The James Donald Forbes McCann Catamaran Plan - TULSA GOLDFISH

Episode Date: October 2, 2024

Peep the visual component: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCX8puwySi2vmz0YxCqoYMCg/videosJoin the 500 club: https://www.patreon.com/jdfmccannGIGS, Houston, Chicago, Tulsa: www.jdfmccann.comGET YOUR PAMPHLET TODAY: https://www.jdfmccann.com/pamphletGSTK out now on YoutuBe: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XivuZOzcUUsBuy the books: https://www.jdfmccann.com/books Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Thank you for listening to this episode of the James Donald Forbes McCann Catamaran Plan. If you'd like to listen to bonus episodes, go sign up to the Patreon. That's patreon.clom. Clom? Ah, we f***ed it. Anyway, look, you'll find a way. Catamaran Home! Can Indigenous ways of knowing help kids cope with online bullying? At the University of British Columbia,

we believe that they can. Dr. Johanna Sam and her team are researching how both Indigenous and non-Indigenous youth cope with cyber aggression, working to bridge the diversity gap in child psychology research. At UBC, our researchers are answering today's most pressing questions.

To learn how we're moving the world forward, visit ubc.ca forward happens here. ACAST powers the world's best podcasts. Here's a show that we recommend. I'm Jessie Kirkshank, and on my podcast, Phone a Friend, I break down the biggest stories in pop culture, but when I have questions, I get to phone by a tween. Facebook is like a node.

That's what my grandma's on. Thank God Phone a Friend with Jesse Crookshank is not available on Facebook. It's out now wherever you get your podcasts. Acast helps creators launch, grow, and monetize their podcasts everywhere. Acast.com. Oh, excuse me, I didn't see you there. Hello and welcome to this episode of the James Donald Forbes McCann Catamaran Plan. Live with a stunning visual element from the studio, which I...

I bought a desk! There's a desk now. There's posters that I plan on using. There's a printer on which I can print out very important things. There's a beer that's not technically part of the office, but I'm finding that to help things go down a little more smoothly. And we have serious important things to talk about now that I'm here in this beautiful room, at this beautiful desk, with a beautiful visual component,

full speed ahead to boat ownership. So many vital, just drawing a little bit on my hand, so many vital things to talk about today. I'm the James Donald Fools McCann catamaran, playing the show where I, James Donald Fools McCann, am trying to raise enough money to buy a boat. Number one, Tulsa and Houston. by a boat, number one, Tulsa and Houston. We begin the journey towards boat ownership greatness and the taking over of America by becoming a big comedy superstar with two gigs, Tulsa, October 6, and Houston, October 13.

You can go to www.jdfmccann.com slash gigs. Or you can follow the link below. And yeah, come to those shows. If you're in Tulsa or Houston or the areas nearby, boy, oh, boy, wowee, I'd love to have you there. Oh, so many exciting things happening today on the episode. We'll be looking at the, well, we already looked at the digs. That was item of business number one. The new digs.

We still have the nautical theme put up by Wonderful Eve. I have this lamp. I have the pamphlets up there. There's an updated pamphlet coming. The printer. So many wonderful things on the printer. I have this horse

in a tuxedo jacket playing probably a double bass. A double bass. Possibly a cello, but I think a double bass. A white horse in a tuxedo jacket playing a large stringed instrument. maybe it's a very small horse

and that's meant to be a violin but I saw that and I thought I think that's what we're all about here on the James Donald for some can catamaran plan boat ownership absolutely and on the road to boat ownership, a horse in a tuxedo jacket, I like it, all right, I'm putting it over there, I had it on the desk earlier, and then I thought, well, then either I'm looking at it, and you're looking at the backside of the horse, or I'm, you know, I'm looking at the backside of the horse, and you get to enjoy, this way, or I'm looking at the backside of the horse and you get to enjoy it. This way, I won't be distracted by the horse and you can still enjoy it.

So much to talk about today. Big meeting underway right now on the James Donald Forbes McCann Catamaran plan. New digs. Item of business number one. We've already got to it. Item of business number two. Plug upcoming shows. Well, we did that, didn't we?

Tulsa, October 6th. That's this. It's like in one week. Less than that. It's like five days. And Houston, October 13th. Houston. And there will be more.

There will be more on Houston. I'll plug that show more fully. I'm going to flag. I'm going to do a spoiler alert for the end of this episode is that we're bringing back fish of the week it'll be the goldfish it's going to be a stunning end to the episode and then of course we must discuss

the 500 Club which listeners to the audio only version of the podcast will be all too familiar with and for people joining us exclusively on the visual, what a shock and a surprise coming up there. Tulsa, I wanted to find some facts out about Tulsa, ahead of going to Tulsa, and instead I just read about the Tulsa Race Massacre of 1921, the single worst incident of racial violence in American history. And that was pretty grim. So I moved on from that quick smart.

Here are some famous people from Tulsa. Hanson. Leon Russell. Going down the wall. That's Leon Russell. And they hold up. Cornell West. Who's that very energetic black dude who's always saying exciting things. Did you know that he was from Tulsa?

You did now. Bill Hader. Who doesn't like Bill Hader? Nobody. And the wrestler slash, I think he was a defensive tackle, Goldberg. Goldberg's from Tulsa. And I'll tell you who else is from Tulsa. And this was a wormhole that I went down ahead of my trip to Tulsa.

And I'd like to find out more about this while I'm in Tulsa this weekend. Granville Oral Roberts. That was born in 1918 and lived on through to... Hello? Excuse me, that's the printer. The printer makes small noises sometimes. I was born in 1918 and lived on through to... Hello? Oh, excuse me. That's the printer. The printer makes small noises sometimes. I'm a little agitated.

I just... I took the kids all day so that my wife could sort out some storage things with the bedroom. The family's back. The family was in Australia for like six weeks and they're back now. And so I just took the kids all day so she could help get the things planned. And I... It was great. It was great. It was a great day. No one was frustrated.

There wasn't definitely screaming in traffic for 40 minutes. Granville Oral Roberts. He died in 2009. He was an American charismatic Christian televangelist, one of the first to propagate prosperity gospel theology, which is, I think, of all the theologies, my very least favorite theology. But there are some facts about his life, specifically the construction of the towers,

I think it's the third largest tower in all of Oklahoma. So even bigger than at least two towers in Oklahoma City, the CityPlex towers. So he got a vision. This televangelist, he had a vision to build a hospital. And the plan for the hospital was that you would faith heal people, but also use modern medicine. Little column A, little column a little column b and the state didn't want him doing it but he prayed on it and his partners gave him money and they ran out of money while building this huge beautiful hospital and according to a fundraiser

letter on in 1980 roberts prayed for guidance in front of the unfinished hospital. He claimed that a 900-foot-tall Our Lord encouraged him to continue the project, and Our Lord said, according to Roberts, he said, I told you I would speak to your partners, and through them I will build it. Roberts described the vision, When I opened my eyes, there he stood, some 900 feet tall, looking at me. His eyes, oh his eyes! He stood a full 300 feet taller than the 600 foot tall city of faith, which is what the, I guess, cityplex towers were called at the time.

People were skeptical. People were skeptical of Oral, but he did raise the funds, revealing inspiration from God, instructing them how to finance the project. He said, give it to me in multiples of seven. I want $7, $77, $777, and then God would bless the people giving him the money abundantly, presumably with more money, because he was a prosperity gospel guy. We round the corner now into some exciting things that then happen with the hospital. It accepts its first patient in 1981. It gets off the ground. It's not a hit. Maybe it's not a hit because people were just so healthy in Tulsa,

but I think people probably didn't want to go there. In 1986, the city of faith was losing over $10 million a year. In 87, costs spiral out of control roberts goes on television and he says god's going to call him home if they don't get eight million dollars and it says on the wikipedia that i took this from call him home brackets a euphemism for death he's saying i'm gonna die if i don't get eight million dollars for this hospital i think this would make a terrific movie i don't think anyone's made this a movie yet they meet the donations goal but again this hospital is losing 10 million a year so they need eight million dollars to keep the lights on still losing 10 million a year they reach it but he starts looking for people to buy

out the facility and then only eight years after it opened it was at 25 million dollars in debt it was closed last patient leaves in on the 16th of october 1989 most of the complex was converted to office space and they changed it to cityplex towers now here's here's the coda to the movie that i really enjoyed here's another thing as well They had a huge statue that I've looked up of. It was like bronze praying hands. It's gorgeous. They've since moved it to his university, which I think is doing a bit better. Wonder how their football team does.

During the 1990s, CityPlex was the home of Commercial Financial Services, a large debt collection agency. Here's the fun bit. The debt collection agency filed a high-profile bankruptcy in 1998. Is that not funny? Imagine being another debt collection agency calling a debt collection agency because the debt collection agency isn't, come on, folks, the movie writes itself. Doesn't come on. Folks, the movie writes itself. I'm coming to Tulsa.

I'm coming to Tulsa on the 6th of October. I hope to see you there. I hope to go for a trip to go and see those towers. The goldfish is what we'll be talking about today on Fish of the Week. Fish of the week. Fish of the week. Carassius oratus, the gilded carp is what that translates to. This fish was first spawned in China

as so many fish presumably were. It was selectively bred for its golden colour more than a thousand years ago. And you'll be thinking ah, James, that'll be the Song Dynasty. And their more than a thousand years ago and you'll be thinking ah james that'll be the song dynasty who uh and their color was like a yellow gold i'll bet that it was the song dynasty that bred that fish and that they didn't want anyone else having the special gold fish you damn right about

that that's exactly what happened that's exactly what happened and then it was still cool even though like normal people outside the imperial family had the goldfish i've been reading about the goldfish in europe it became a gift that husbands would give to their wives at the start of the marriage i think this was in the 15th, and it was a sign of the prosperity to come. Ah, now we have a fish that is gold, but soon we will have gold, and that too shall be gold. But then it was pretty easy to breed goldfish, and then just everyone had them, and they stopped doing it because it didn't mean the same thing anymore. Here's a goldfish myth.

They have short memories, and do you know why that's a myth? It's not true. Fact. Goldfish have a memory span of at least three months. They can differentiate between different people. They have favorites and they can even remember the time of day that they're supposed to eat. Someone get Mensa on the phone. These goldfish need to be enrolled stat. Now, like most fish, be enrolled stat now like most fish they are opportunistic feeders and they do not stop eating on their own accord so just one of the many things that i have in common with the goldfish overfeeding can be deleterious to their health and it blocks the intestines especially with very strange goldfish and another weird fact about goldfish eating is that in captivity,

they sometimes eat children. Let's play a game now. The game is called Which of these goldfish is most offensive to God? It's not this goldfish. That's for sure. That's a normal goldfish. It's not this goldfish, that's for sure. That's a normal goldfish. It's not this goldfish either.

That's a differently coloured, fairly normal looking goldfish. Again, these have been selectively bred to have different characteristics and some of them get pretty kooky. This goldfish, one of its fins have disappeared and it has an overgrown anal fin. I didn't know about anal fins before being on this particular Wikipedia deep dive. You don't want to dive too deep or the goldfish will be crushed. They need to be at a normal sort of water density.

Are you ready? This is definitely a goldfish that offends God. What are we doing? You think that one's bad? Check out this one. Whoa! Why are we doing that to the eyes? Why do we need to continually breed animals

that we've already made look cute and passive until they are in obvious pain? I draw your attention, possibly for the first time on this podcast, to a pug's skull. This is what the pug looks like. This is its skull. I don't like what they're doing to these goldfish with these horrifying looking eyes.

It's not right. Something should be done. Here's another fun fact about selectively bred goldfish is they can no longer breed naturally, some of them, due to their altered shape. They have to be artificially bred with hand stripping, which I think is pulling the goldfish ejaculate and eggs out and mixing them up to make beautiful new little goldfish,

and that can also hurt goldfish. Important goldfish facts for goldfish owners. Fish bowls are detrimental to the health of the goldfish and are prohibited by animal welfare legislation in several places. Practice of using bowls as permanent fish housing originated from a misunderstanding. See, the Chinese used to have great big ponds for their goldfish, and then to get the goldfish out so everybody could have a look at it,

and it's presumably freaky eyes, you would put it in a small, what would we call that? Fishbowl. Just so we could all have a look, and then you put it back in the big one. But we in the West, we've misunderstood that beautiful Chinese practice, and we just keep them in goldfish bowls. And that's obviously very wrong. If you have a goldfish in a bowl, fix it. It's oh so naughty and possibly illegal for the goldfish. Who was I thinking of who speaks like that? It'sames brown when he's full of cocaine on a cnn

interview it's this look of like oh i'm enjoying what i'm saying there was no need for me to voice that but i wanted you to know that that's my favorite interview anyone's ever done we misunderstood the chinese isn't that terrible we did the same thing with foot binding. We made our feet bigger. Goldfish kept in aquariums, like mini aquariums, like a bowl. They suffer from death, disease, stunting. They stunting out here.

And then I get bored. I'm bored of talking about goldfish. What I want to talk about now is the 500 Club, and we spoke about this on the podcast, which is just audio, and you can go and listen to that. There have been a couple come out since we had a visual one

with the great Sean Gardini. Ladies and gentlemen, the 500 Club, the Patreon for the James Donald Forbes McCain Catamaran Plan where there are special secret episodes and, you know, just satisfaction in helping another man raise enough money to buy a boat. It's going really beautifully. Thank you for asking. Well, we're almost at 500 members.

And in true televangelist style, I think it's time to start well we already have started it's the 500 club this is a club only available to the first 500 members of the james donald forrest mccann catamaran plan patreon which you can join up to now there's about 50 spots left and it's filling up fast what do we get for being in the 500 club i'll tell you you'll get the beautiful 500 club certificate that i made myself on canva and it's got a digital signature by me you can print that out put that up and as soon as we've got over 500 members on the patreon i'm ripping the 500 club certificate offline so that is only meritoriously available for the first 500 members of that club.

You get so many things on the Patreon. Do join the Patreon if you enjoy the show and you'd like a little more. And of course, once we get over 500, I've already started thinking about the 1,000 club. I'm looking forward to thinking about the things we'll be able to do in this room. I'm looking forward to it, yes indeed. On this wall, we'll be putting the top Patreons, the people who are most contributing to the James Donnell Fools of Cancun Catamaran Plan bankroll, saving up enough money to buy a boat, $500,000.

Their faces will go on this wall. We actually have too many faces, I think, for the size that I was planning on printing them out at. So faces might gradually get smaller. There's another good reason to jump on that. James Olfors, we can't catamaran plan Patreon. Oh, mercy me, I'm taking the zin out. I got scotch tape. Patreon. Oh, mercy me. I'm taking the zin out. Ah. Ah. Ah.

I got scotch tape. They don't call it scotch tape. No, they do. I got scotch tape so I can pin those pictures to the wall with beautiful scotch tape. I tried to buy Blu-Tack at the Office Depot and they didn't have it. And what was more concerning is they didn't know what i was

talking about at all and i'm told that there's a similar product you can buy at walmart and perhaps the hobby lobby but to not have blu-tack at an office shop was so confronting to me as an australian that i exploded nah seriously folks let's's make sure I've got to fix that so that doesn't start turning off. Big things coming up on the pod. Recorded a glorious interview. That'll be coming out soon with a very famous, beautiful person. And, well, I'll have that come out this week. So there's two coming out this week. So this one can be a little shorter. Unless there's anything at all that I wanted to speak about here on the James Donald Fultzman Academy of Rant Plan,

I don't think there is. Now these post-it notes, I was going to use them to put up the plans on the wall, and I will. A book of poems, an album, the movie, the second movie. That's all I've got in the tank, I think. Can I run a hoe? Oh, I could do some affirmations. Might be nice to do some affirmations might be nice to do some affirmations we should close the show on affirmations

people like that in our new top professional digs I'll tell you what made it possible for me to come in here and do this podcast we got a new air conditioner, the old air conditioner wasn't working and the other thing that made it possible for me to come in here and do the show is, you might be able to see the bed there is that people have been coming and staying and that no one's staying here anymore.

So I have an office slash guest room. And that's, of course, slash as in jdfmccann.com slash gigs, not office slash guest room as in an instruction to the office to take a knife to the guest room. Wouldn't that be just a terrible thing if that happened? Yes, indeed. Now, look, things are progressing well. I'm trying to be more professional about it all because it's going so damn well. The numbers are going really better than I had anticipated,

better than they had been going in the past. And I think if I can professionalize without losing that beautiful spark that keeps this operation a moving i think i'm actually going to get a boat and i have to start thinking seriously about what i want to do with the boat i have no idea but i thank you for the support i thank you for helping me get that boat. It's probably enough podcast now. Catamaran. Oh, I was going to do the affirmations.

Affirmation. We're going to keep it professional. We're going to keep trying to keep it professional and keep it exciting. I am haunted by the thought that haunted the Romans. There's a drawer in this desk. That wasn't the thought that haunted the Romans. I'm listening to a podcast about the Romans.

They were always worried that as they became more civilized, they'd become less brutal. And the central point there being that as you regiment things and progress, you lose some of the dynamic spark that kept you exciting in the first place. I think of, excuse me, a little burp there. I think of punk music, you know, and your first punk album is probably your best one.

And certainly if you have a successful punk album, the next one might not be as good as the one that came before. Wouldn't mind hearing counter arguments to that. But people, I've heard it said that that's one of the reasons punk music stopped. And rap music kept going because you start out poor in rap music, and then you get rich, and then you can just now rap about how rich you are, and so it creates a virtuous cycle, rather than the vicious downfall of punk music, that you do too well, and then you've sold out, people liking you, makes it collapse, and I am am afraid of that and then i'm also afraid of

being a poser because with this beautiful room i don't have to do the podcast in the car and i think if i i mean not to say that i won't have to do the podcast in the car again there are so many things coming up that will necessitate me doing something like that i just mean to say do you know what i'm saying as you get more successful and structured, you lose a little bit of that thing that made it special in the first place. And we're not going to let that happen. Affirmation. Well, it's not something that you can actually stop happening,

but we're going to try and... We're going to think about it, and then hopefully that'll make some sort of difference. Affirmation! We stay strong and beautiful. Affirmation! Beautiful and strong. Vital.

Affirmation! I'm going to try and be a more patient father. I've been without the children for six weeks, and it was devastating, and it was necessary because we couldn't get the family back here financially and logistically and i had some work here that i had to be here for my wife didn't want to be in the austin heat and that thank god is now beginning to pass got a new air conditioner in here thank you landlord nice to have a good landlord affirmation affirmation Nice to have a good landlord. Affirmation. Affirmation. Affirmation.

Affirmation. Affirmation. I'm going to be a better, more considerate father. And another affirmation. Affirmation. I am going to put more time into this. I really thought that would be enough notes for 40 to 50 minutes of chit-chat, and it's not, because I'm all alone, and that's a foolish way to do a podcast.

And I genuinely don't have anything further to say about Tulsa. I love you, I miss you, I want you, I need you, Catamaran Ho. Goodbye. Here's a show that we recommend. I'm Jessie Crookshank, and on my podcast, Phone a Friend, I break down the biggest stories in pop culture. But when I have questions, I get to phone a friend. I phone my old friend, Dan Levy. You will not die hosting the Hills after show.

I get thirsty for the hot wiggle. I didn't even know a thirsty man until there was all these headlines. And I get schooled by a tween. Facebook is like, no, that's what my grandma's on. Thank God Phone a Friend with Jesse Crookshank is not available on Facebook. It's out now wherever you get your podcasts. Acast helps creators launch, grow, and monetize their podcasts everywhere. Acast.com.