The Jamie Kern Lima Show - “Life-Changing” COMMENCEMENT SPEECH “I Dare YOU…To Believe in YOU!” Jamie Kern Lima | WSU 2025

Starting point is 00:00:00 Hi, I'm Jamie, and I am so excited that you're here today. And welcome to a special episode of the Jamie Kern Lima Show podcast. I am so excited for today's episode. And if you're craving a boost of inspiration and hope, if you're in need of the words, stories, lessons and tools to get unstuck and to ignite belief in yourself, well this is your episode and it's called I Dare You. I Dare You to Believe in You. See that's the title of the commencement speech I just wrote and shared with the

Starting point is 00:00:41 incredible graduates at my alma mater, Washington State University. And the words and message are so universal that even though I wrote them, I myself needed to hear them too. And I hope today these words speak to your soul and feel like they're exactly for you because they are. And whether you're listening for yourself today or because someone who cares about you

Starting point is 00:01:08 sent this episode to you, I wanna say welcome to the Jamie Kern Lima Show podcast family and please make sure you take two seconds and click the follow or subscribe button on the app you're listening or watching on. That way you'll be the very first to get new episodes of the show. And please make sure to share this episode

Starting point is 00:01:29 with everyone who needs inspiration in their lives. And make sure to share it with every recent or upcoming graduate that you know. It's called I Dare You to Believe in You. And when you do, watch what happens. No one can tell you your dreams are too big. History is written by the ones who dare to be first. You will have ideas.

Starting point is 00:02:01 You will have ideas that others don't understand yet. You'll have dreams that scare even you. You'll be called crazy before you're called brilliant. And what I want you to remember is these words every time that happens. You're not crazy, you're just first. You're not crazy, you're just first. You're not crazy, you're just first. Class of 2025, when fear whispers you're not enough, you say back, watch me. When rejection stings, you're not ready, you answer, I was born ready. You are capable, you are resilient,

Starting point is 00:02:43 you are needed. Not someday, not if you become more perfect right now. Exactly as you are. You are worthy of daring. And class of 2025, today I dare you. I dare you to believe in the power of your dreams. I dare you to believe that you have what it takes. I dare you to believe in the power of your dreams. I dare you to believe that you have what it takes. I dare you to believe you are more than qualified. I dare you to fail. And I dare you to believe that you're worthy of getting back up again and again.

Starting point is 00:03:19 And I dare you to be first because you already are. And what I know for sure and what I'm living proof of I dare you to be first because you already are. And what I know for sure and what I'm living proof of is you can go from underestimated to unstoppable. You have everything you need inside of you right now to do that. And if you want to change the world, I dare you to believe in you and then watch what happens. I love you too. I am so honored, so grateful to be here. President Cantwell,

Starting point is 00:04:07 faculty, alumni, families, friends, and most importantly, the powerful, resilient, history-making class of 2025. Congratulations! Congratulations! Today is your day and in a powerful way it's also your beginning and I know firsthand that beginnings can feel scary because it wasn't that many years ago where I sat right here in this exact stadium about to graduate. I was filled with big hopes and dreams and while I wore a cap and gown inside of this room I wore an apron outside of the room while waitressing at Denny's just down the road from here to pay for tuition And I had no idea that one day I would build a billion dollar company from my living room. Right?

Starting point is 00:05:12 In fact, I spent most of my time actually wondering if my big goals and dreams were even possible for someone like me. I was broke, I was filled with so much self-doubt. I worried that my past mistakes might somehow disqualify me from my dreams. I wasn't super well connected, I wasn't certain, but what I had and what you have right now

Starting point is 00:05:44 is something far more powerful. The power of possibility that's already inside of you right now and today I wanna talk to that part of you. The part that's wondering, am I ready? Am I enough? Can these wild and crazy dreams I have, the ones I don't even tell anyone else about, can they really happen for someone like me?

Starting point is 00:06:11 And my challenge for you today is this. I dare you. I dare you to believe in you. And I'm gonna share three stories stories and they're not just about my journey, they're about yours. Because what changed my life can change yours too if you dare to claim it. And I believe the future belongs to those who are willing to dare, who are willing to dare to believe in themselves, who are willing to dare to fail, and who are willing to dare to be

Starting point is 00:06:55 first. And right now I want to ask you to dare to imagine what would you do if you fully believed in you? I have learned time and time again that it is so important to dare to believe even when it feels like no one else does. Growing up, I would watch Oprah in my living room every single day, and I would dream of one day like her sharing other people's stories with the world. So after WSU and after grad school, long before I created it Cosmetics, I chased a dream to

Starting point is 00:07:35 become a TV news anchor. I sent out countless audition tapes, but the rejection letters kept flooding in, many saying, you're great on camera but your skin isn't. I have rosacea, it gets really bright red, it's bumpy, and no makeup would cover it. And I was told again and again that I wasn't the right look for the job. But I kept going and I landed an internship at CAP TV in Yakima, Washington, where, yep, where I actually worked for free.

Starting point is 00:08:09 I borrowed my Aunt Karen's station wagon to be able to drive to and from work. She's actually right up here in the audience today. I remember the door panel, it would fall off any time I took it through the car wash. But I was so grateful, y'all. I was so grateful and I was determined. And eventually I got hired as the main morning anchor

Starting point is 00:08:29 at KNDU TV in Tri-Cities, Washington, Tri-Cities, and then the weekend anchor at KPTV in Portland, Oregon. And I thought, one day I'm gonna host a show so big I can interview Oprah. And y'all, I envisioned it, I prayed for it, but what I didn't realize was that my dreams were about to take a huge tumble and a big detour. And while anchoring the news live one day, I heard in my earpiece from the producer, there's something on your face.

Starting point is 00:09:00 There's something on your face. You need to wipe it off. You need to wipe it off. You need to wipe it off." So I glanced down during the commercial break and I saw the makeup was all breaking up. If you imagine the way desert clay kind of cracks and breaks up and the bright red was coming through, which was all my rosacea. So I tried to cover it up with makeup during the commercial break and it didn't work. And that actually turned into what became a really long season of

Starting point is 00:09:28 Self-doubt where every time I'd be live on television. I'd be thinking am I gonna get fired and I'd always hear in my earpiece Jamie it's still there. It's still there. I Literally thought every single time I was at work I was gonna get fired and I would spend most of my paycheck just trying to find makeup that would work and nothing did. And then one day I felt this whisper, maybe you've had whispers in your life too, I felt this whisper that said if you cannot find anything that works for you why don't you figure out how to create something that does. So my gut, my intuition, my knowing said you can do this. You can

Starting point is 00:10:06 start a business and figure out how do you find the best chemist and how do you make an amazing product that's gonna help so many other people too. But my self-doubt said, oh but you got no money, you don't know anyone in the beauty industry, you are not qualified. And I made the decision to dare to trust my gut, to trust my knowing over my self-doubt. And my husband, Paolo, also right up here in the audience today, my husband Paolo and I, we both quit our jobs, we poured everything we had into starting a company called It Cosmetics in our living room. Now, what I didn't know was from the moment

Starting point is 00:10:50 that we went all in, it would be more than three years, more than three years before we could even afford to pay ourselves a single penny, and hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of rejections and no's. And during this journey, I realized even though there were thousands of beauty companies out there in existence, I had never seen one showing a model that looked like me, that had real serious skin issues. And I also realized, maybe you've had this experience too, growing up I used to love seeing those beauty ads. I loved them. I always aspired to look that way but deep down inside they always made me

Starting point is 00:11:30 feel like I wasn't enough. So when we launched It Cosmetics I had this huge kind of crazy at the time wild vision to try to change the entire beauty industry by instead of using those like airbrush, Photoshopped images and models, I wanted to use real people like me, every age and shape and size and skin tone and skin challenge and call them beautiful models and mean it, but it wasn't being done yet. So nobody thought it would work, especially the experts.

Starting point is 00:12:04 Every retail store said no. Sephora, Ulta, QVC, all the department stores, all of them said women will not buy products from images like this. And they'd always say that they'll only buy products from images of unattainable aspiration. Those were always the words that they would use, which means you cannot even look like that because it's not even real. And I was like, well, maybe people are sick and tired of buying products from people that don't look like them.

Starting point is 00:12:33 But I wanted to change that. I wanted to change it for every little kid who was about to start seeing those ads and start doubting themselves and every grown person who still does. It is scary to trust yourself, especially when no one else around you seems to think you're right.

Starting point is 00:12:53 After a few years of non-stop nos, a huge moment happened. You see, I'd always dreamed of launching our products on QVC, which is a live television shopping channel. It's broadcast to more than 100 million homes across the country. And when you have a product, QVC is huge. It's a huge deal because you can actually sell more there on QVC in a 10-minute window

Starting point is 00:13:19 than in most store chains nationwide for an entire year. So it's massive. And I had gotten word that the head of QVC Beauty, a guy named Alan Burke, he's like a living legend, he wanted to have a call. And I thought, I have been sending them our products for years, so many samples for years. And right now, as we're down to no money left,

Starting point is 00:13:42 and we had no idea how we were going to keep going. I was like, this is it. This is finally it. This could change everything for us. And when I got the call, I was so pumped up. I was actually pacing around our entire office, which was our living room, and I was like power posing. I was like trying to tell myself they'd be lucky to have us. And I got the call and he said, hello, Jamie, this is Alan Burke with QVC. And he said, listen, I want to call you myself and let you know that we received your samples,

Starting point is 00:14:16 all of them, and I wanted to tell you myself, I met with the entire buying team and it's unanimous, you are not the right fit for QVC or for our customers. And I remember standing there, y'all we were so close to bankruptcy at that moment. I remember tears start streaming down my face and I went into pitching I'm like oh but Alan we are the right fit. I told him all the reasons why and he thanked me for loving QVC and said it's a no I Wanted it to be a yes so bad at the time

Starting point is 00:14:51 I've been getting so many rejections for years, and I truly hoped this would be it But we kept going kept going and kept going barely keeping the company alive, and we continued to get rejection after rejection. One potential investor who we were really hoping would be our saving grace, he even ended the meeting by saying, congratulations, this is a really great product, you should be really, really proud. But to be honest with you, I just don't think women will buy makeup from someone who looks like you with your body and your weight. That one, y'all, I cried in my bed for three days straight after.

Starting point is 00:15:37 But every time I would get another rejection, I would meditate or pray and I would keep getting this feeling deep inside that said, you're supposed to keep going. You need to dare to lean on your faith. You need to dare to believe even when it feels like no one else is. And I would write these words in my journal. Champions aren't made when the game is easy and you are a champion. And what I know right now as I stand here, what I know for sure is that each and every one of you is born to be a champion too and today is the day to decide to dare to believe that for yourself. It's true. After years of rejections and more rejections and more rejections and no's, a moment, a

Starting point is 00:16:41 huge moment, it finally happened. We got one single yes that had the power to change everything. QVC finally gave us a yes and I learned we would get one shot live on QVC to present our product in this 10-minute window and either hit their sales goal, which is massive, or not come back. And I learned I'd have to sell over 6,000 units of our product in a 10-minute window, live on air. And y'all, we were doing one to two orders a day

Starting point is 00:17:15 on our website, OK? But we said yes, and we went all in, and we hired third-party consultants who are amazing. They help a lot of people, but they told me if I had a shot at succeeding, we wouldn't use need to use what they called beautiful models to demonstrate our product and our one big shot, which to them meant they all had no skin issues,

Starting point is 00:17:38 the same skin tone, and they look like they were barely 18. But I knew doing that, doing what everyone else was doing, isn't what I was created for. And it's not what you're created for either. And I knew that I'd rather play my heart out fully to change the beauty industry. Even if we tried and sold nothing, I'd rather stand for something than sell a whole ton of product but stand for nothing. So in my

Starting point is 00:18:11 one big shot when it came it took everything I had inside of me to dare to believe and I went for it. In my one big shot while we were teetering on bankruptcy and after years of hearing no's, I cast models of all ages to demonstrate our product. One in her 70s with hyperpigmentation, one in her 20s who was dealing with acne, models of all skin tones, skin challenges like me, I even wiped my makeup off to show my bright red bumpy skin on live TV. Everything was on the line.

Starting point is 00:18:48 And right as I was standing there, right as I was standing there in the QVC studios about to go live, I learned you are not even guaranteed your 10 minutes. See, they know by the second what's selling and they know if you're hitting the sales numbers or not. So you could be a minute or two in and you if you're not hitting the sales goals you might think you still have eight minutes left but all of a sudden your clock jumps down to one minute and you're done. So I learned that. No pressure right? I remember walking in I remember the moment the giant on-air light went on

Starting point is 00:19:24 right on the cameras and the the moment the giant on-air light went on right on the cameras and the countdown clock, the giant countdown clock started and it said 9 59, 9 58. I remember the moment my bare face came up on national television. I had on two pairs of Spanx, not because I cared how I looked but I was sweating so much that I didn't want to sweat through my dress on national television It was so stressed. I remember walking over the models live on TV every age and shape and size and skin tone and skin challenge and calling them beautiful and meaning it this early in every ounce of my being and I knew that We were a few minutes in,

Starting point is 00:20:05 I didn't know how we were doing, but I knew I wasn't cut yet. I was like, okay, okay. And then I remember y'all at the nine minute mark, we had one minute to go. And I hear the host say, the deep shade is almost sold out. The tan shade is almost gone.

Starting point is 00:20:20 And at the 10 minute mark, the giant sold out sign came up across the screen, which was wild. I start crying. Yeah, it's crazy. I start crying on national television and they cut from me and went to Dyson vacuum or something. My best friend Jackie, who I met right here at Wazoo, she was modeling. She had a full tattoo on her forearm. We covered it up with the makeup. So good. She starts crying. And then I remember my husband, Paolo,

Starting point is 00:20:51 he comes rushing through the double doors of the studio and I was just sobbing and I was like, real women have spoken. And I thought he was gonna come hug me, right? He comes up to me and he just looks at me and he puts his fist in the air and he's like, we're not going bankrupt. And I was like, ah.

Starting point is 00:21:12 And he's right there. And that one airing turned into more than 250 shows a year, year after year, we grew to more than 1,000 employees and became the largest beauty brand in QV's He's history. Just crazy. What everyone else said would never work changed everything And here's what I hope you let take root. There will be moments, maybe even right after today, when people will underestimate you. There will be moments when even the people who you love might suggest playing smaller, safer. But you have a choice. Will you listen to the world's doubt?

Starting point is 00:22:06 Or will you dare to believe in yourself anyway? Because the biggest breakthroughs in life happen not when someone else believes in you, but when you finally believe in yourself. Daring to trust yourself, daring to believe in the power that's inside of you, this will change your life. This is what allows you to live in alignment with your assignment when it comes to the calling and the purpose that only you have in this world. It's also so important to dare to fail and to redefine what that means. I wish I could tell you that the road to your dreams will be easy, but the truth is, it

Starting point is 00:22:49 most likely won't be. You're going to get rejected. You're going to fall down. You're going to question yourself. I know because I lived it when I stood just three feet away from that major investor and I was struggling, hoping our company would survive and I really thought, oh my gosh, he's going to save this and then he told me, women won't buy makeup from someone who looks like you. I could have let those words define me.

Starting point is 00:23:19 I could have made that rejection and failure mean I wasn't enough. But instead, I made the decision to choose to assign a different meaning to rejection every time it happened. And you can do this right now in your life too. See, for years, I would think, oh, failure meant I didn't have what it takes. But I decided to believe I have the power to make it mean whatever I want it to. And so do you. So when I would get painful rejections, even when they stung, I would intentionally decide

Starting point is 00:23:54 to pull from a toolbox of meanings that I had created that would empower me instead of make me feel defeated. Meanings that I believe to this day are true of rejection and failure. And here's a few in case you wanna add them to your toolbox today too. I believe rejection does not mean I failed, it means I'm victorious because I'm one of the brave ones willing to go for it, and so are you.

Starting point is 00:24:29 Rejection is redirection. Another one is it's happening just not yet. I host a podcast called the Jamie Curlema Show and by the way the first guest I had on my show was Oprah. She did her first ever three-hour interview in her career, still processing that. And I love the podcast because there are so many great life lessons that guests have shared on the show that I've been added to my toolbox. And I think about them daily. One of them that I want to share today is from the interview I did recently with Megan, Duchess of Sussex, where she talked about the power of adding the word yet to the end of sentences. Instead of saying I got rejected and didn't get the job, say I didn't get the job yet. I haven't gotten

Starting point is 00:25:10 my book published yet. My idea or my art or business hasn't gotten traction yet. And this next definition is one of my all-time favorites because I believe this is a universal truth, no matter if you practice any particular faith or not, but if you have had that person who said the most painful thing to you, or maybe the job you thought you wanted says, no, you're not the right fit.

Starting point is 00:25:41 Maybe that person pulled the rug out from underneath you and betrayed your trust. This applies to all kinds of rejections. When that happens to me and it happens to all of us, I pull this definition from the toolbox. Rejection is God's protection. You could say rejection's the universe's protection. See, I believe your creator will block your value from

Starting point is 00:26:06 people who are not assigned to your destiny. And this belief helps me never take rejection personally. And when you don't take rejection or failures personally, it becomes a whole lot easier to dare to fail. In my journey, eventually after enough nos, after enough nights wondering if we would make it, after enough rejections to wallpaper my entire apartment, I kept getting back up every time I got knocked down and we kept going and we kept growing. And in 2016, L'Oreal, the biggest beauty company in the entire world, knew we had created something unlike what other people were doing. What I was told over and over

Starting point is 00:26:52 would never work had become one of the largest beauty companies in the country. And in 2016, L'Oreal paid 1.2 billion dollars cash to buy the company I started in my living room and they made me the first woman to hold a CEO title of any brand in their 100 plus year history. So I went from waitressing at Denny's, and I love that job, by the way, actually celebrate there all the time to this day. But I went from waitressing with a big dream and a whole lot of self-doubt to CEO of leading a billion dollar company. I don't care how many no's you get, The key is to never let anyone else's doubt about you turn into doubt in your own head.

Starting point is 00:27:51 Their doubt doesn't get to define your destiny. Anyone else's no doesn't get to define your yes. The pain of failure is temporary. But the regret of giving up lasts forever. And every no you hear is simply evidence that you're brave enough to be in the game. That your dream is worth failing for. Your purpose is worth falling for. And your calling is worth fighting for. Failure doesn't disqualify you. Failure actually qualifies you for greatness when you dare to go for it. Oh and remember the head of QVC Beauty,

Starting point is 00:28:37 Alan Burke, who said you're not the right fit for QVC or for our customers? Well shortly after we launched onto QVC, he became one of my greatest mentors and dearest friends. And he still is to this day. He had been there for decades. And shortly after we launched on QVC, he retired. And then we hired him in a paid position on our advisory board. So the guy that rejected me was now working for me, right?

Starting point is 00:29:10 Like, no one. No one. No one. No one. No one. No one. No one. No one.

Starting point is 00:29:17 No one. No one. I don't know who needs to hear this today, but no one can tell you you are not the right fit. And my hope and my prayer is that you never tell yourself that. Because here's what I know for sure. When you dare to believe in the power of your dreams,

Starting point is 00:29:34 people might underestimate you. They might say you don't have what it takes. They might even call you unqualified, but one day they'll call you genius. People might doubt you or even call you unqualified, but one day they'll call you genius. People might doubt you or even call you hurtful names behind your back. And then one day they're calling you for advice. They might say, you don't come from the right family. Your parents didn't go to college. You don't pray the right way. You're,

Starting point is 00:29:59 you're too tall. You're too short. You're too young. You're too old. Your body's not right. Your, your cheeks are too red, then one day they're bragging to people how they met you. They might call you rejected and then one day they just might end up calling you boss. And let me get really really today, because I'm a Coug and we keep it real. They might call you, hey waitress, hurry up, man, I need my bill, while you're busting your butt, filled with self-doubt, trying to pay your WSU tuition. Then one day, they call you commencement speaker on WSU's stage in a stadium filled with the most diverse and powerful class of first generation students in WSU's history.

Starting point is 00:30:52 No one can tell you your dreams are too big. Turn to your neighbor sitting next to you and say, I dare you to dream big. Turn to the neighbor on your other side and say you've got this. Lastly, lastly it is so important to dare to be first, even when it feels lonely. When you dare to be who you truly are, when you dare to do things authentically to you, by definition, they've never been done before. Because there's only one of you in the entire universe. So when you dare to trust yourself

Starting point is 00:31:43 and do it the way only you can, you're first. You're the first ever only you, so do not be surprised if not everyone gets it or gets you. Because there's never been a you before. And I promise you that the things that maybe others think are odd or quirky or wrong with you are actually the things that are most right with you. If I had listened every time someone told me to change what I was doing to succeed there is no chance I'd be here talking with you today. And when

Starting point is 00:32:16 you share an idea, I want you to remember this, when you share an idea that's never been done before people will often doubt that it's gonna work. That's how it so often feels when you're first. And here's why this matters. If you're willing to be first, to be brave enough to be misunderstood for a while, you can change everything. Not just for yourself, but for every single one who's coming after you. Because history is written by the ones who dare to be first. You will have ideas that others don't understand yet. You'll have dreams that scare even you. You'll be called crazy before you're called brilliant. And what I want you to remember is these words every time that happens. You're not crazy, you're just first.

Starting point is 00:33:18 You're not crazy, you're just first. Class of 2025, when fear whispers you're not enough, you say back, watch me. When rejection stings, you're not ready, you answer, I was born ready. You are capable, you are resilient, you are needed. Not someday, not if you become more perfect right now, exactly as you are. When you wonder if you are crazy for dreaming so big, remember the world doesn't need more people playing small. The world needs more people who dare to believe in the power of their dreams, the ones who know that Denny's dreams can become billion-dollar realities,

Starting point is 00:34:04 the ones who know that rejection is not defeat, it's victory. The ones who know that they were never crazy, they were just first. You are worthy of daring and class of 2025, today I dare you. I dare you to believe in the power of your dreams. I dare you to believe that you have what it takes. I dare you to believe you are more than qualified. I dare you to fail. And I dare you to believe that you're worthy of getting back up again and again.

Starting point is 00:34:42 And I dare you to be first because you already are and what I know for sure and what I'm living proof of is you can go from underestimated to unstoppable. You have everything you need inside in you and then watch what happens. Thank you and congratulations Class of 2025! Go Cougs! I love you! Who you spend time around is so important as energy is contagious and so is self-belief. And I'd love to hang out with you even more, especially if you could use an extra dose of inspiration. Which is exactly why I've created my free weekly newsletter that's also a love letter

Starting point is 00:35:51 to you, delivered straight to your inbox each and every Tuesday morning from me. If you haven't signed up to make sure that you get it each week, just go to JamieKernlima.com to make sure you're on the list and you'll get your One on One with Jamie weekly newsletter and get ready to believe in you. If you're tired of hearing the bad news every single day and need some inspiration, some tips, tools, joy and love hitting your inbox, I'm your girl. Subscribe at JamieKernLima.com or in the link in the show notes. Welcome to the Jamie Kern Lima show.

Starting point is 00:36:29 Oprah, how have you defied the odds? Her show is unlike any I've ever done. A revelation. When you listen, it feels like a hug, but your brain and your spirit and your heart is like, wow. Melinda French Gates. When I look into Jamie, I'm like, wow, I'm going to be a star. I'm going to be a star. I'm going to be a star.

Starting point is 00:36:37 I'm going to be a star. I'm going to be a star. I'm going to be a star. I'm going to be a star. I'm going to be a star. I'm going to be a star. I'm going to be a star. I'm going to be a star. I'm going to be a star. I'm going to be a star. I'm going to be a star. I'm going to be a star. When you listen, it feels like a hug, but your brain and your spirit and your heart is like, wow.

Starting point is 00:36:46 Melinda French Gates. When I look into Jamie's eyes, I feel like I am on some other cosmic level with her. I could see the light around her. She's infused with light. Imagine overcoming self-doubt, learning to believe in yourself and trust yourself and know you are enough. Welcome to the Jamie Kern Lima show.

The Jamie Kern Lima Show - “Life-Changing” COMMENCEMENT SPEECH “I Dare YOU…To Believe in YOU!” Jamie Kern Lima | WSU 2025

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