The Jefferson Fisher Podcast - How to Talk to Someone With Tourette Syndrome ft. Baylen Dupree

Episode Date: August 28, 2026

*Note: there are unmuted curse words in today's episode* Today, I sit down with Baylen Dupree for a conversation about Tourette syndrome, neurodivergence, and what good communication actually looks like when someone experiences the world differently than you do. Baylen opens up about the things people often misunderstand about Tourette’s, the communication challenges she’s had to navigate in relationships and everyday life, and what she wishes more people understood about interacting with someone who is neurodivergent. We also talk about conflict, overstimulation, speaking up for what you need, and how the people closest to you can learn to communicate with you better. This is a conversation about understanding people beyond what you see on the surface—and becoming a more thoughtful communicator in the process. Join me on Supercast for ad-free episodes, bonus content, and AMAs: https://jefferson.supercast.com/ Leave me a voicemail to be featured on the show! https://www.jeffersonfisher.com/ask-jefferson  Order The Next Conversation Workbook: https://www.jeffersonfisher.com/workbook Thank you to our sponsors: AG1. Visit https://drinkag1.com/jefferson. Save an extra 20% on your first subscription order of AG1 Next Gen, AG1 Pro, or AG1 Essentials by going to https://drinkag1.com/jefferson and using code BACK2ROUTINE. Cozy Earth. Upgrade Your Every Day. Get 20% off at cozyearth.com/jefferson or use code JEFFERSON at check out. BetterHelp. Click https://betterhelp.com/jeffersonfisher for a discount on your first month of therapy. Order my book, The Next Conversation, or listen to the full audiobook today. Like what you hear? Don’t forget to subscribe and leave a 5-star review! Suggest a topic or ask a question for me to answer on the show!  Want a FREE communication tip each week? Click here to join my newsletter.  Join My School of Communication Watch my podcast on YouTube  Follow me on Instagram  Follow me on TikTok Follow me on LinkedIn Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Your husband, remember me of his name? Colin. Yeah. Yeah. And so when you're talking to him, is there like, is there something he does in particular that helps center you or helps smooth conversation or conflict? When we first started dating, I was like, I have these attacks that happen. and I would just prefer if you weren't in the room. And he was like, why?

And I was like, I'm just embarrassed by them. I don't like anybody to see them. Very vulnerable. They're very hard for people to watch because I'm hurting myself. And he's like, well, I want to be there for you. Like, I don't want you to like deal with this by yourself. So we started having joint tick attacks together. Not a lot of people you date have Tourette's syndrome.

When we think. of ticks. I, you know, I've heard of Tourette's. And so in the words or phrases that there are verbal things that it's like almost to understand like a sneeze that you just, it's totally involuntary. And what comes out isn't chosen. It's just what's what comes out. And then the same way with motor skills at ticks. So I have people I know who they'll either, they just thing where they clear their throat right before they talk every single time and they don't even know that they're really doing it. So how intentional for those who go, I mean, can you choose the words that you have? No. Yeah. I don't really get to

choose. So you get a premonetory urge before you tick so you know kind of you get a feeling. So you kind of know what you're going to say or do. However, when I say that to people, they also think, so you're able to control it and I'm not able to because they're not things that I'm thinking of. They're not things. They're not thoughts. Right. They're not like I say a fat ass and I see one. Like it's not like that.

Or a sign of an inner belief. Yes. No, no inner belief, no inner thoughts. Like I've had people get offended by the things that I've said and I'd be like, okay, like it's completely involuntary. It means absolutely nothing towards you or towards. the type of person you are. But I have very little control when it comes to certain ticks. I've learned certain techniques. There's a thing called CBIT therapy, cognitive behavioral intervention for ticks. And I use a lot of those techniques regularly. So when I'm in my apartment or I'm in my home, I call it my

safe space to tick. So I'm as loud as possible or sometimes I'm also as quiet as possible because I'm so calm in that environment. Yeah. I also am curious kind of on these foundations. for people who know nothing about Tourette's. We know it's involuntary. We know it encompasses a spectrum in which there are ticks from verbal to motor. So we can talk about nonverbals like facial expressions to scrunching of the face or grimaces or neck motions or anything like that to actually saying words that have nothing to do at all with what's either in your brain or what you believe or what you know. So any of that can be something that. is on that spectrum of Tourette's.

When does it, is it something you're born with or something that develops over time? So Tourette's is technically hereditary, but there's also not enough information to know how it manifests and how it starts just because there is people like me where Tourette's doesn't run in my family, but tick disorders run in my family, OCD runs in my family, depression, addiction, all of those things. like there's the way I like to describe Tourette's is there's an iceberg and you only see what's at the top, which is the Tourette's. But everything underneath the water and underneath everything, there's all these comorbidities. I also struggle with OCD, anxiety, bipolar, ADHD, all these other conditions that also attach itself to Touret.

I'm going to ask a question. I do not know the answer to is. Tourette's considered a neurodivergent behavior? Yes, you are neurodivergent if you have Tourette's. Okay. I have a lot of people who listen to my advice who say, look, I am, I'm neurodivergent. And your advice sounds great, Jefferson, but I have no idea how to apply that in my life. And so I want to first understand what is the right way, the right way first, to apply to a approach somebody, communicate with somebody who has threats?

The easiest way is to pretend like it doesn't exist. So there are some things that I say that are very funny. And when I'm laughing, I find it appropriate for other people to laugh. But when I'm not, I don't find it appropriate. There's been times where before I met my husband, I went on dates and I would smash my head off the table and this, the other person would laugh. And I'd be like, well, that's not really acceptable. but the easiest way to approach somebody with Tourette's is to pretend like it doesn't exist.

And then as they tick, if you're talking as they tick to continue talking, I get asked that probably every time I meet somebody. What's that? What question? To keep talk, like, yeah. One of the best ways. Yes.

But just to treat them like everybody else, like it's very, very easy to like get disoriented and think it's like funny or you think it's like a joke or like think it's hilarious, but there's another part of it that people just don't see. And the part that like I don't show is the nasty part. It's the ugly part. It's the part that makes me really, really insecure and is really, really hard to deal with because it's more than just sayings.

It's more than just phrases. Like, I don't know how you want to word it, but it's more than just vocal tics. Like I've smashed snow globes off my head. I've never personally had a tick send me to the ER, but I've had several friends that have gone to the ER because they're ticks, but that's a different story for a different time. Okay, so what I'm hearing is when you're dealing with somebody

who is, who has ticks in particular, maybe anybody on, I don't want to say anybody on the neurodivergent spectrum or scale, I do want to say for sure with Touretre. is to one just continue to talk as if none of that's happening because in reality that's not would it be fair to say in reality that's not really them like that's you are not the ticks you get what I mean so like that says that's that's not you from the standpoint of you are not Tourette's yet there is like you said there is a lot more going underneath so what's the best way to handle that just act as if they

don't happen now that doesn't mean you can't be lighthearted and if you say something that's objectively funny mm-hmm objectively laugh, but don't treat it as though that is who they are. Is that fair to say? Yes. Okay. Perfectly said. So then let's talk about now we know the right way.

What's the wrong way to approach someone who has to write? There's a lot of different ways. A lot of people think it is funny to, for example, if I was never on social media and I never had a platform, would you video me in public and laugh and joke around? would you still call me Tourette's girl? Would you say my ticks to me? Because as soon as you say somebody's ticks to them, depending on there's different things, there's echolalia and all these other attachments

that come on to Tourette's that I don't really have the ability to talk about just because they don't know them that well. So when you say certain ticks, I have echolalia where if somebody repeats my ticks, then I say it back. It's a huge trigger. But I would say them, like, I've been approached thousands of times, and I've had a lot of good people, but I've also had a lot of bad people.

And before I was on social media, I worked at a grocery store, and I had people come in. I had on my little name tag that, hello, my name is I have Tourette syndrome because when people would come in, they would mock me, they would make fun of me. they'd, I even got to one point, it was right after COVID and some guy refused to be cashed out by me because he didn't want to get what I had. So he walked around the store with his shirt up. He complained, he was screaming. He was on the floor, banging on the floor. He's like, get me out of here, get me out of here. And luckily, he made a huge scene to the point where somebody else checked him out because he was banging on the floor telling me that he refused service from me. And I was like, I don't know what to do.

Yeah. And he walked by me and held his shirt over his head. And he said, like, you shouldn't be out in public. And I was like, okay. Yeah, maybe he needs to be a different form of checked out too, probably, because I feel like that's, yeah, that would be hard. But there's a lot of, I imagine there's more bad ways to approach, a negative way to approach somebody.

There, there is. And like, I also want to share the time that I went and I got an award. I got a Gracie award. And it's a very proud moment for me because all of my hard work and sharing my life and being so vulnerable pays off. Wonderful. And when I was there, some girl said, the hostess said, everyone, please take your seats. And I, like, I was with a group of people and I said, take a dick.

And he goes, the guy there goes, what are you talking about? And I said, oh, I have. Tourette syndrome. Like it's just, it's just like that sometimes. Right, which is, it was a verbal tick. Yes. And he goes, I'm going to use that as an excuse next time. And I was like, no, no, no, no, this is an excuse. Like, I have this condition. And he goes, yeah, yeah, that's what I'm going to say next time. And I was like, okay. So now it's in between people not thinking it's real and making it a joke. But there's a lot of different ways to not approach somebody. And being rude is, and disrespectful isn't one of them. Like, it's just human courtesy

to approach somebody and not be disrespectful. So it's very interesting. Like, I don't know, definitely the older crowd doesn't really like my condition. Let's just put it that way. I've had a lot of people come up to me in public. Tell me to stop. Stop what I'm doing. The noise is really loud. It's bothering them. It's inappropriate. Yes, it's inappropriate. There's children here. I'm like, if anything, there's going to be somewhere in the world where your son or your daughter runs into somebody that has the same condition as me. And you,

hiding them isn't going to help anything. You are. What a chance to actually learn something. Yeah, a teaching moment for them because it's that this is, this is life. It's the world. And people look different and act different and treat people different. Like the world is filled with oysters. So.

Yeah. Yeah. Everyone's different. Some of us harder to crack you in this, that's for sure. But always the pearl, right. How much energy, Bealin goes into keeping it together when it comes to being in public? I would say a lot. I have like this hierarchy above my head that I'm supposed to like act a certain way or like if I'm out in public too long.

I've had people approach me and tell me, well, I've been, staring at you for the last 20 minutes and you haven't ticked at all. And it's also just, it's just, I'm always looking for cameras to be videoed me because that's in the back of my head from the very beginning. I'm always looking for somebody to, that's there to hurt my feelings. Like, I'm always on high alert, no matter where I go, just because I never really know how I'm going to be treated. It's always either a good or a really, really bad. And it's, It's just really hard to tell every single time I go out, so it's definitely like I'm always on my best behavior.

That sounds really hard, Baylon. It can be. It definitely can be. There's definitely days where I choose not to go outside or I choose not to leave my apartment. Yeah. But that's to be worked on. It's something that continue to move through. And I think you do a beautiful job with that.

Thank you. I love the perspective that you have on the this and so I just I know we have more conversation and go with telling you I'm really enjoying it and I think you're approaching this all the the right way and I can feel I mean you're just a genuine person thank you so much yeah and so I'm really really grateful for to continue this conversation with you when we we talk about relationships and communication there's a lot of advice that I give on how to improve relationships and friendships on life by changing the way you use words. How has it been? You know, congratulations on the marriage.

That's incredible. That was like, what, a month ago? A little over a month ago. That's awesome. Very cool. Thank you. What have you relationships you'll find more and more? There's a lot more conflicts. And I know y'all dated for a long time before you got married. What is that dynamic like in terms of now you have a relationship, now you're married, and now you're having married conflict or arguments. How has that dynamic been with the challenges that are presented by TICS? My husband does a great job with every challenge that comes his way with my condition. And being there and supporting me, I never feel like I'm alone in any certain way. But there is a lot of challenges when it comes to it, just because.

because there's a lot of things that set my ticks off. There's a lot of triggers, and there's a lot of things that maybe we could disagree on, but also at the end of the day, it's better for my condition to not do this or not do that or not probably surround myself with those people or be around, like, we've had conversations about friends and them saying things about my ticks and who I am and me being a downgrade. So it's just there's just been some conflict in some areas like that. that, but we navigate it perfectly and the best way we can. We have gotten prior relationship advice before getting relationship counseling before getting

married, which I feel like definitely helped out a lot because when you're married, there's a lot of things that can happen that you didn't think could possibly happen, like with kids and family and life and house and all these things. And you may not really know that you have that side of you until kids, until you start having kids or until somebody loses a job. And it's like trying to realize that we still choose each other through it all is the most important thing. And I feel like the one thing that's helped us the most is we keep God at the center of our relationship. No matter what, no matter the conflict, no matter anything.

But we've also really learned that when we're when we're having a bit of a tizzy, we do like breaks. We'll be like, okay, I just let's come. back to this, let's resolve this in 10 minutes. You go play video games. I'm going to listen to music. Let's figure this out later. Like, we just need a break because then when it starts, when you start getting mad and emotions start coming out, you say things that you probably will regret later on. And we just learned that that doesn't really work out in the long run. But I'm really glad that we were able to get the counseling before we got married because it definitely has helped us a lot. Like,

it's so nice. And like we had a we had a great relationship before. It was the best test grade I've ever gotten in my entire life. That's awesome. But it also just goes to show that like good people and good relationships can go through therapy and come out with a stronger relationship than they did before. Oh, marriage counseling is it's amazing. Highly recommended. It's amazing. And it sets a good foundation, let's say. It is it is far from the only thing you can do once once you're married, you gotta you gotta there's a lot of maintenance to be in it and i'm i'm really excited i think y'all are sending yourself up for a wonderful beautiful marriage so thank you so congratulations to that thank you um i want to talk about real quick um your husband and for those who remember me of his name

yeah yeah and so when god damn when you're talking to him is there like is there something he does in particular that helps center you or helps smooth conversation or conflict. My favorite thing about him is the fact that he has every single quality that I do not have, every good quality, obviously. He balances you. Yes, he's the ying to my yang. So, like, certain times where I get really overstimulated in, like, environments and, like, I have social anxiety, surprisingly, like, in big groups and big crowds. and like I just don't really feel like I belong.

So I get really, really quiet. And my ticks get really, really bad. Or sometimes they get really, really good depending on the environment, depending on the people. And he'll always just be there to be like, it's okay. Like we can go home. We can stay here. It's totally up to you.

Like, you let me know where you stand. It's very much helpful in a lot of different ways. There's a lot of different things that he does. But ever since we started dating about three and a half years ago, I tell it and I say it over and over again, he's my medicine. He, everything that he does calms me just by being there next to me, especially when I go and I have busy days or I have long days or I'm just at home and I feel lonely because he goes to work every day. And I stay at home and I watch the dogs. But there's a lot of different ways where he helps the little things that I'm not very good at and I have anxiety about.

It's definitely good because I definitely don't want somebody that's exactly like me. So. Well, I think that's just those are all relationships. I can say that's the same for me. Is there something in particular that he's had to either learn or unlearn when it comes to communicating with you? Yes. And there's also things that I've also had to learn too. Like when we get into fights, I'm the yeller and nobody would probably surprise that.

But I've also toned that back and I've kind of come to a realization of like, I can't do that. Like this isn't healthy. This isn't good. But like also I've moved past that and we've moved past that. But what was the question? Yeah. No, I think it's, well, I'll have to ask myself. It's something that either he's had to learn or you've had to learn or unlearn my communication.

And for example, like, to help maybe get your mind spinning on it, for me and my wife, right? I've had to learn that often when we're in a spat, what do you call it, tizzy? Yeah, we're tizzy. Yeah, we're tizzy. I have to, even when I want to break and we're like, okay, we need a time out, I still have to just use the words, like, we're going to be okay. We're going to get through this. I need to take a time out and we're going to have to take break and calm down.

But she needs to hear even before the break, we're going to be okay. Otherwise, in that break, it can be more harmful than helpful in that situation. And that's something that we've had to learn. And I'm curious from y'all's perspective, your perspective, is there something not only you've had to learn as a couple of how to communicate, but specifically whether there are ways that communicate that would either hurt or smooth over some of the challenges you have in communication? I would also say one of the one of my weak points is communicating. I've gotten better at it. That's also one of the things I've learned through the relationship that I get very quiet.

I get very like my opinion doesn't matter. I just would rather move on, say sorry, forget about it and just go on with the rest of our day. I'm a very forgiving person. Like, you could shoot me in the right foot and I would forgive you. Like, I really would. I mean that from the bottom of my heart. I'm not saying, do it.

Yeah, yeah. But I'm very, very easily forgiven. Forgiving. And so when we get into fights, I'm usually the first person to be like, let's just, let's just worry about this another day. Like, we're fine. Everything's fine.

but him telling me that everything's going to be fine helps. That was a great example. It gave me examples to live off of. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because I'm not the best at communicating. I'm not. I've gotten way better at it. We've been dating for three and a half years.

So I've gotten way better. But it's definitely something that we both had to learn together because the way that I would respond and then the way that he would react just wouldn't go well. So it was learning to give time. but also learn that you're going to be okay after the timeouts. And we're going to come back and find a resolution and we're going to be okay. Like we always have worked through everything and we're going to continue to work through everything. But I would say I'm not the strongest communicator.

And he does a great job at being patient with the fact that I'm not a good communicator. He probably asked me six or seven times if I'm fine. Like we went out to a bar last night and I was like, everything's fine, everything's fine. And I kept saying that and I was like, everything's not fine. Like, it's so crowded here. Like, I want to leave. And then I told him that. He's like, okay, let's go. Let's go. So it's just using my voice and communicating is really hard for me. Yeah, I hear that. I'll tell you what this is what I do, because I know he's back there, is there'll be times when Sierra will tell me like, I'm fine and I know she's not fine. I know. And so because we've been around each other that long,

And so what I typically will ask is, will you tell me about it later? Mm-hmm. And that's when she'll almost always say yes. Okay. And that's when it's like, okay, I'm, I have relieved her of having to give the like, put on this performance of everything's okay when it's really not, you know, she's either not comfortable. This is a situation you want to get out of.

Maybe it's a stuffy restaurant. Yeah. And sometimes you don't want to have to talk about it in front everybody or bring up the conversation because I have so much anxiety about going to restaurants and people video in and recording our conversations. Like everything like that because we're in the public eye, so everything's kind of just out there for grabs for everybody. Yeah, no, yeah.

It's definitely the public can either be really kind or pretty rough. Mm-hmm. Before we keep going, a quick word from AG1. I will admit it, I do not always hit my nutritional requirements. Why? Because life gets busy. And when life gets busy, I often find myself going to the things that are easy habits. to stack. That's why I choose AG1, just one scoop in cold water in the morning, and I know that I'm setting myself up with something that's going to support my nutritional goals and my gut health.

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and now let's keep going. When you're in a lot of, let's say the high end of the conflict, you say that you might be the person who first raises their voice. Right. Does that, out of curiosity, does that aggravate? I don't know if that's the right word, Baylon. Is that create more problems in communicating with ticks? Or does that actually, doesn't have any bearing at all? It doesn't have any bearing at all.

I just, that's the first way that I used to, like, respond just because I'd just say everything's fine, everything's fine. And I'd just let it build up. And then I'd be like, okay, everything's not fine, actually. I'm going to tell you what's fucking wrong. All right. So it was just like a buildup of everything, but now I've learned, like, through three and a half years, like, I'm still learning. But to just say what's on my mind, let him know what's going on. Like, now I'll tell him and be like, I have a lot of things.

anxiety right now. I have a lot of anxiety. Yeah. And he's like, do you want to tell him about it? I'm like, no, no, maybe, maybe later. Right. So it's, it's, it's, we've definitely had those same conversations as well. Well, good. Well, keep those up because they don't, they don't, they don't get any easier. They don't stop. Yeah, they don't, they don't, they don't stop. So I want us to think for a second, uh, of somebody who's listening, bailing who they know, they know that they know that they're neurodivergent and they know that they've, they've, they have particular challenges when it comes to how others either perceive them or how they handle

communication what's something that you would tell that person that you've learned about yourself that could help them you think one thing i can tell people is that comparison is the thief of joy and that we are only given one life on this earth and it's very easily can be taken away from us at any moment or any time. Being neurodivergent is not easy, but it also is a superpower in the craziest way. You have a lot of things that a lot of people don't have and you have what I like to call, well, superpower, because you're different and you're unique and there's nobody out there like you. You can think that there is or you can want to be somebody else, but God created you for you. for you to be yourself and create your own dream and your own story and your own chapters in your life.

So the best advice I can give to people is in a world full of people that want to be everybody, be yourself. Because you never know where it's going to take you. And it's so important to share your story, regardless of if it's on social media, if it's with somebody in an elevator, you never really know how that story or their life will impact you. For example, I was just, I just got back from West Palm Beach. We did from our honeymoon. And this lady come up and she's like, I'm just so sorry to interrupt you.

I'm just so sorry. I have to take a photo with you. And I was like, oh my God, of course. Like, no, no, no, no, like, no, like, my husband died a month ago. And he loved you. He loved you. And I was like, well, I'm glad that we met. This is like meant to be.

Yeah. So I'm glad that I was able to be a piece in your husband's life that made him smile and made him laugh. And I was able to be that for him and for you. And I'm glad that we were able to meet and have this connection. And it was just really, really beautiful. It was just really beautiful. Yeah, I don't know. So just share your story.

Share your story. You never really know how it will be impactful. I mean, that girl changed my viewing on a lot of different things. makes me think like when you're reminded that somebody you love and you hear another story of that person that's sitting right next to you, their person's gone. It like makes you think like, oh my God, like I should give him an extra hug right now. Or I should tell him like, oh my God, you look handsome. You look like anything to like just truly remind yourself that life is so precious and it can be taken away at any moment. I was going to ask this earlier, Baylon, about what age did the

tick start for you? So I was around six or seven and I noticed some neck movements and looking back. I used to like, like go like this a lot to my legs and I always felt like I had to and I couldn't stop doing it. But I never really knew that that was a tick until probably like three years ago until I went to the like started realizing, oh my God, like this is the other ticks that I have as well. So they started around six or seven but they they weren't both. It was only motor. Um, then they went away and then they came back around 15, 16, right before COVID. They were very, very mild. I had a throat clearing tick and I had like a neck twitch like that.

But I would say they got worse during COVID and now they're kind of getting to a point where they're a lot better than what they used to be. I mean, five years ago, my parents were feeding me. So it was really rough. Because it just became hard. It became really hard. I wasn't able to get the food in my mouth. I would throw the food. I would throw the forks. I would stab myself with the forks. I would I remember one time I got

I got in trouble because I hit my mom in the head with a frying pan. That will do it. Yeah, that will do it. She was not happy. I felt terrible like so terrible. And obviously like when I hit you in the head with the frying pan probably at arm speed, you're not really going to feel that good. So I went downstairs and I was like, she hates me. My mom hates me. Yeah, but she didn't. No, she didn't. But it was definitely like what people like obviously through bailin out loud, you get to see like my journey and my progress and my life. But what people don't realize is nobody ever saw how bad it actually got other than my family and Colin. Nobody really knows how bad it really looked and how bad it got.

I was having maybe three tick attacks a day, which is like an excessive amount of ticks. in a period of time, either vocal or motor or both, but you just never know how long they're going to last. So, like, I've had, like, two-hour tick attacks, like smashing my head against the floor. Sounds exhausting. It is exhausting. And then you...

And, like, physically tiring, is what I mean. It is. It definitely is. And then sometimes it gets so complex that, like, it looks like I'm having a seizure on the floor, but it's not. And that's something I imagine Collins had to learn. Multiple. There's been multiple times that like when we first started dating,

I was like, I have these attacks that happen. And I would just prefer if you weren't in the room. And he was like, why? And I was like, I'm just embarrassed by them. I don't like anybody to see them. Very vulnerable. They're very hard for people to watch because I'm hurting myself. And he's like, well, I want to be there for you.

Like, I don't want you to like deal with this by yourself. So we started, having joint tick attacks together. So he'd come and just help me and hold me and just tell me that everything was okay. And it was definitely something that I needed in those times and that they still do happen, but they're very rare. And it's definitely something, again, that he's had to adjust to and learn because not a lot of people you date have Tourette syndrome.

But he's also had to learn that like during these attacks, like he has to go get ice. He has to be very supportive. He has to be very aware. Definitely keep an eye out that nothing bad is going to happen because nobody really wants that. I don't want a trip to the ER at all. Yeah. Then it becomes an element of safety. Mm-hmm.

Yeah. Beilin, I would love if we would put our mind to the person listening who feels like they not only can relate to you, maybe not even relate to you on having Tourette's. but also there's other challenges that certainly impact their communication. What I heard from you one is it's best to just continue on as if it's not even a thing. So that's probably number one. Is there a number two? Don't mock them. Mock. Don't mock them. Don't repeat their tics. You mean like whatever they say, don't say it back?

Don't say it back. Or, yeah, probably don't say it back or mimic their tics. Like, I I worked at a coffee shop and my boss at the time I was dealing with a lot of ticks and I had to quit my job. And he was like, oh, I'm Baylon. Oh, I'm Baylon. And I was like, okay. Well, now you literally lost me. And he would like, he just had no idea what it was. He had no idea what I was dealing with. He would call like every week and be like, are you coming back to your job? And I was like, I can't. You disrespect me, so I'm not going to. Oh, yeah. Well, that's incredibly insensitive.

Yeah. There's also an element of be educated, educate yourself. But I would say the last thing is two. Two last things. People with Tourette's don't tick 24-7. They just don't. So people assuming that people with Tourette's tick 24-7, and a lot of people assume that Tourette's is only cussing.

and it's called corpolaelia. And corpolaelia is only in about 10% of people that have Tourette's. So it's very misunderstood and very misinformed that a lot of people with Tourette's, all they do is swear. When I first got diagnosed with Tourette's, I didn't swear. I didn't cuss. I had very, very mild tics.

And then I came home from Thanksgiving break, and my brothers were playing video games outside my room. room and all I heard were bad things. So I caught on to it and it's just stuck sense. Mm-hmm. One, and I think what Colin does well is incredible amount of patience. That's what it sounds like. Two, continue to just act as if they're not happening. Three, don't mimic them. Mm-hmm. And I guess the last one you wanted to add was knowing that, that there are different types and there's, I think this goes kind of to that iceberg thing

you were talking about earlier. There's a whole lot more going on than just what you're thinking of and maybe probably even what people on social media think of it is just the phrases. And there's a whole lot more that goes on to it. I would say that definitely and I think a lot of people, when I share my life on social media, I do the best way I can, but there's a lot of things that I miss.

I miss a lot of my good days and I miss a lot of days where I have more motor ticks than I do vocal ticks. I mean, I'm only human. I'm trying my best. Trying to show the world what it's like for me to live with the condition. But I do wish that people understood that my motor ticks are actually worse than my vocal ticks. Like, even for me to walk down the hallway earlier from where we were staying to the elevators that was like 10 doors took us like, 10 minutes to walk down because I kept ticking. And it's like, again, he has to be very patient.

Like, I don't want him to get annoyed. I don't want to hear any huffing or like things like that. Just because, like, I know that it's a lot. I personally know I'm the one that's dealing with it. I'm the one that's having to have you be so patient. So like, it's another thing that we've had to learn that like it just, it does take a lot of patience and I give him a lot of grace, but also a a lot of people don't understand is that in a relationship in order for it to work, you have to be patient with the other person as well. And it goes both ways. He's very patient with me, but I'm also very patient with him and very loving towards him the same way that he is towards me. And he is a little bit extra patient with me because he has to be. But it's out of love. It's not out of I'm holding him

hostage to do it. Like he's not duct tape underneath my bed. Like he's not. He's not. Right. Yeah. We've talked about what, and I'm going to use me as the case study here of, I'm trying to think of, if we ask the question of, okay, how do you communicate with somebody with threats? What I understand it is you talk to them just like anybody else. I've just, when they have ticks, you just continue to react as nothing's going on. Now, there's a lot of different people who have a lot of different things when it comes to any neurodivergent behavior. So I don't think. it's it's all apples to apples, right? Everybody has their own, their own thing. And so, but when we're talking about Tick specifically, the best thing you do is just to talk them like anybody else. Mm-hmm. Treat them like everyone else.

Talk to them like everyone else, act like they're everyone else. Like, we're- That means argue with them like anybody else, right? I mean, like, even handle conflict, they're not somebody that you need to kind of handle, with oven mitts. You know what I mean? Yeah, we're humans too. And I think a lot of people don't see that. They see us as like animals and don't belong in society.

My doctor, when I was getting diagnosed with Tourette syndrome, I have Tourette syndrome, stupid, pointed at my mom and said, look at her. She can't do anything. She can't drive. She can't work. She shouldn't go to school. She does not even fit in society. So I was already viewed as a lot of.

less of a human being because of my condition. And a lot of society sees that as well. And I feel like with the show and with spreading awareness, it's helped a lot from what I've noticed, from me going on social media to me starting a TV show, it's definitely changed the dynamic of meeting people. When actually the show was, you do a pilot, so you do a little trailer video to start off the show

and you send it to like people in New York, City to like watch over. And the all the comments we got back from it was, oh my God, she actually has it. She actually has it. Like we are, everybody thought I was faking it there. And they all wanted to watch more because they thought I was faking it. But now since the show has come out, people now know that like she's got a real condition. Like, I mean, TLC isn't going to put me on their show with a fake condition. Like people are just, people are just out of this. world crazy. Well, that. You can't help crazy. That's going to happen. No. No, you can't. But also at the same time, like, let them be them and I'm going to be me and keep doing what I'm doing.

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Meaning if you could go back in time, Bealin, and talk to that, let's say, 11-year-old. I'd give her a big fat hug. Yeah, big fat hug. And what else would you give her? A lot of love. Because back then I was very different. I don't know, I was very insecure. I was, I was just a different person.

Like, it was going through puberty. I was the youngest person to get my period in my grade. I was the tallest person in my grade. I, it's difficult being a girl and being 11. And just, I mean, that period, that alone is hard enough. And then adding in, I moved schools, so I left all my friends because, my dad's job. And so we took that path and we moved and that was really, really hard to transfer

schools in the middle of the year and try to find a friend group and everybody had a friend group and everybody had a click and everybody had friends. And I had nobody. So it was really, really hard to like start from scratch and like do all of those things that like normal people probably wouldn't have to do. Like I moved around twice, three times. So starting different schools, meeting different friends, different people, different cultures. It's beautiful. It's amazing, but it's hard at the same time because you're so young, but also I don't regret anything that my dad did. He did what was best for us and what was best to put food on the table. And maybe back then I held it against him, but I don't now.

I never would because he's that shaped me into knowing the reality of the world. I lived in a small town. Everybody knew each other. Everybody knew everyone's drama. I moved to Georgia. I get this beautiful cultural reset and almost just like a like a like my lens was cleaned. Like it was a different world. I loved it.

I loved the Bible Belt. I loved people. I loved meeting everybody. But I would give Baylon a younger like younger me a hug just because she was so insecure. She was so worried. she thought she would just never be loved. So I'd definitely give her a hug. Yeah, I would too. Tell her she's made it really far. Yeah. Yeah. What would you, what about the Baylon who's, you know, realizing the, that there are ticks and that there are things that other people don't

have? It was definitely very difficult to realize that when I was like 15, 16, and I went to the doctor and I found out I had Tourette's. I was like, oh, like, this is like, serious. Like, I had no idea. Like, I knew I had Tourette's, but like, I had no idea that it could be this bad or look this bad. And it got to a place where I left all my friends because I didn't want to reintroduce myself. I never left the house. I still went to college, but I didn't graduate just because when I was at the college, when I was going through the nursing program, they told me, you're just the, you're just the, talk of the school, nobody knows how you're going to be able to do it. And I was like, okay, I'm paying you $20,000 to tell me that you don't know how I'm going to be. Okay. Okay. And then she sent after we had class, she like was like, bailin, I really need to talk to you privately. And I was

like, okay. And she goes, if you're going to want to be a nurse, you're going to have to stop talking like that. And I was like, you mean ticking. And she's like, you're going to have to stop that. And I was like, aren't you a nurse? Like, what are we doing here? And at the same college, I went to, I went to go get blood work done and they couldn't do it because of my condition. I went to go get a COVID test done. They couldn't do it because of my condition and I had to give it to myself. So just the ticks. Just the ticks. And I looked at her at that same day and I was like, the same people you're telling me that I can't do it, I can't be a nurse because of my ticks, your same nursing students can't treat me like a human being.

because of my condition. Yeah. That's what you're saying is you're teaching your students the wrong way of life, the wrong way of trying to be a nurse. Like I just, I don't get it. But would you tell that person who's realizing and got diagnosed with Tourette's, what would you tell that what would, who would today's, let me phrase that, what would today's Baylon say to that person? You're a rock star. Yeah. You're a rock star. You're a rock star. You're crushing. it, you're moving forward, you're starting social media, you're being vulnerable. And I feel like that's also a superpower. I'm going to get a tattoo that somebody told me one of my fans, my supporters.

They were like, you're so strong enough to be vulnerable. And I was like, I'm going to get that right here. That's a good one. I like that. So it just has always stuck with me. And I would just tell myself that I'm doing the best I can. I can and that there's brighter days and that we can make it out of it just because I didn't really want to be alive during that stage.

Yeah. So. I can't even imagine. So strong enough to be vulnerable. That's beautiful. Thank you. Thanks for sharing that with me. Of course.

What is sort of become your default phrase or sentence when you're in public and you have a tick and somebody is reaction? to it in some way when it's now become a more public thing? It depends because I am not the type person for confrontation. I won't do it. I'll just straight up leave. My husband, though, loves confrontation, loves talking to people, and loves telling them and putting them in their place. So he will usually do it for me.

What was the question? Yeah. No, that's good to know. Yeah, I'm imagining that there is the tendency to feel like anytime you go out in public and you have a tick and they're not familiar, whether it's a restaurant or wherever you go, that you're needing to often apologize a lot. Always. Always.

That has to be tiring. I always apologize. It doesn't really, because I never really know what I'm going to expect. I've had a lot of different backgrounds and background people. Like, I have a background of people coming up to me and not being nice, not being good people. So I always have that in the back of my head. But I do you wish you didn't have to apologize? Do you think you need to apologize to you?

Of course. I need to apologize, especially since like, there's a lot of things that I've done that like I didn't want to do. And I feel bad for doing or I feel bad for saying. And I don't want that person to take it to heart or I don't want that person to be offended. But I always catch myself apologizing. We went out to dinner last night and she was like, oh, what can I get you? And I said, Dick. and she goes, ha ha ha ha ha.

I was like, oh my God, I'm so sorry, I have Tourette's. And she goes, okay. And I was like, okay. So sometimes it helps, sometimes it doesn't, but I always explain myself. I'm always explaining myself, whether it's to an Uber driver, a cashier, somebody out to dinner, a waitress, a bartender, friends, if I have never met them before. I'm always explaining myself. I'm always apologizing. It gets annoying.

Yeah, how does that feel when you're always having to explain yourself? It feels normal now, but back then it always felt like a task. Like I had to do it because I was given so much backlash. I was talked down to. I was treated poorly. Like, say, for example, I don't get into a ride chair and I don't tell them that I have Tourette's. And I say, like, the most outrageous thing, I've had people that, that or pull over on the side of the road and be like, are you talking to me?

And I'm like, no, like I have Tourette's and they'll be like, okay, and then just keep driving, but then stare at me the entire way. Not know what it is. And I have no idea what it is. I've had people say that they can say, do the same things because they can just say they have it to let loose. I've been told, oh, you're so pretty for somebody that's got all that going on with them. And it's like, there's so many comments.

I've been told so many bad things that just always makes me feel like I have to apologize because that's always in the back of my head. I will, I'll have, I'll meet like 20 people in one day and it will be great, but at the end of the night, I'll run into one drunk person that says the wrong thing at the wrong time. Yeah.

And it just takes away from it because it's so, it's what my mind goes to. Like, I love it. the good people but my mind like goes to the bad people like it's so focused on the bad than it is the good so sometimes it's harder to differentiate because we'll go out in public and we'll meet 20 30 people and i'll be like yeah that one person said something that was really rude and he's like i know but don't let it ruin the the good people and i was like i know but she literally told me that she's sorry you're with me like to my face she told me that out to eat what do you want me to say right

Like, it's just things like that where it's just, it's always in my head and I always feel like I have to apologize. Especially in our society today, I definitely always need to apologize. I don't think you're wrong for feeling that way because I do think there's a part of it as a society that you obviously want them to know that there's so much of this that is not intentional. Otherwise, if you don't apologize or you don't say something, they will assume that it is all intentional. So I hear that. And I also hear that how you get through it, all the negative and the hard, is by focusing also on the good. So for the person listening who is neurodivergent or does have ticks and they have challenges of their own is, or would you say, is the mindset of how much there is to be thankful for and focusing on the good rather than.

and focusing on the bad, meaning being somebody who's always half glassful. Definitely. There's just a lot in this world to be grateful for. And I do have this condition. I do struggle with it. I struggle with a lot of other things in my life, but so does everybody. I'm no different than anybody else that walks this earth. We all have struggles, we all have issues, we all have problems. Amen to that. So it's just, It's better to live in the moment than not. I've learned that from not wanting to be alive, obviously, and not wanting to be here, that I like it here. I like it here.

I like Earth. That is a good start. Yeah. So it's definitely taken me a while to get there, but I have so many good things in my life to look up to, like God, my husband, my dogs, my family, my friends, being able to get up every day. and have a new day being able to go for walks and being able to speak and breathe and see and hear and having all of those qualities, I just know my life could be a lot worse,

so I'm very grateful for where it is right now. And again, five years ago, it was the worst it's ever been. And from then, all I've wanted to do is change the way that I've looked at life and change the way that I've looked at myself, because the way that you've tried, treat yourself says a lot about who you are and says a lot about things. So it takes a long time to be confident and embrace yourself and realize that you are unique and

you are special. It takes a lot to get there. It does. It takes time. It takes maturing. It takes growth. And sometimes with growth, you have to be uncomfortable to grow. You just do.

and that's kind of what I've done. That's not kind of what you've done. That's absolutely what you've done. And I believe that not only in the last five years have you come that way, that I'm really excited to see you continue to go and grow and what life looks like for you in the next five years. Thank you so much. Thanks for coming on. Thanks for having me.

This is amazing. You're great. Thank you too. Of course. Thank you so much.