The Jefferson Fisher Podcast - Stop Giving Your Best To Everyone Else ft. Thomas Rhett

Episode Date: June 9, 2026

Thomas Rhett has spent more than a decade at the top of country music, but this conversation goes far beyond music. We talk about fatherhood, marriage, faith, success, and the lessons he's learning in this season of life. Thomas opens up about raising five kids, protecting family time in the middle of a demanding career, and why some of the most important decisions he's made have been the opportunities he chose to turn down. This is a conversation about priorities, perspective, and making sure the people you love most get the best version of you. Leave me a voicemail to be featured on the show! https://www.jeffersonfisher.com/ask-jefferson  Join me on Supercast for ad-free episodes, bonus content, and AMAs: https://jefferson.supercast.com/ Order The Next Conversation Workbook: https://www.jeffersonfisher.com/workbook Thank you to our sponsors: Cozy Earth. Upgrade Your Every Day. Get 20% off at cozyearth.com/jefferson or use code JEFFERSON at check out. Upwork. Visit https://Upwork.com right now to post your job for free and connect with expert freelancers who can help you grow faster without adding full-time overhead. LMNT. Head to https://drinkLMNT.com/jefferson to try risk free.  BetterHelp. Click https://betterhelp.com/jeffersonfisher for a discount on your first month of therapy. Order my book, The Next Conversation, or listen to the full audiobook today. Like what you hear? Don’t forget to subscribe and leave a 5-star review! Suggest a topic or ask a question for me to answer on the show!  Want a FREE communication tip each week? Click here to join my newsletter.  Join My School of Communication Watch my podcast on YouTube  Follow me on Instagram  Follow me on TikTok Follow me on LinkedIn Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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free of charge. BetMGM operates pursuant to an operating agreement with Eye Gaming Ontario. I want to be known and loved the most by the people that love and know me the most. You know what I'm saying? That's so good. And it's like your best self in front of complete strangers, but you're your worst version of yourself in front of the people that admire and respect you the most. Or my family getting the best version of me. And that's like, buddy.

That is the whole, the world loves to talk about work-life balance. Yeah. I don't believe in it. Yeah. I don't. What do you believe? I believe that you have to sort of be 100% committed where your feet are. Now, I have to say congratulations.

Thank you. For what? Your son. My son. That's right. The biggest thing that would be going on right now. Like the number one thing that could be going on now. Just how is it being...

Have a son. Dude, it's incredible. I mean, you know, I feel like when babies are under six months, it's hard to fully tell personality or anything. But he's like, he's eight weeks, and he's like one of those babies. He was huge. He was 10 pounds when he came out. And now he's like 13 pounds.

And so he's like, he's like, like he's already doing things that a five-month-old should be doing at eight weeks, which is why. Like he's smiling. He's like eye-contacting. Like, I feel like his little personality is coming out. And I don't remember my other kids having that much personality at eight weeks old. Yeah.

He's already in like six to nine-month clothing. That's unbelievable. Nice. I think he's going to be a linebacker. For sure. He did not get that from me. I don't really know what gene that came from. He came from somebody.

Yeah. I was a nice, like, slot receiver. You know what I mean? 145 pounds. He's probably going to be huge. But, um, it's been amazing. bro i'll be honest with you for the first 10 years as being a parent i just sort of accepted the fact that we weren't going to have a boy and i was good with it like i always wanted a boy but the more

girls we started having i was like i can i can do this this girl yeah you have four four daughters that's right yeah and uh man i just um i don't know i just never thought it was in the cards and uh this you know obviously last year the lord kind of opened up some wild doors for us and we got pregnant and I think Lauren has it, my wife Lauren, has it in her phone of like 20 different people that called her before we got pregnant and during our pregnancy that said, hey, even people she hadn't talked to in a long time. There's like, hey, I just had this crazy dream that you're pregnant with a boy. That's awesome. Like 20 recorded dreams. Like our kids had some, our friends had some. And so we all, like, we didn't find out until the day of the birth, which we've never done that

on any of the other kids. And for all of you listening, I highly recommend it. Really? Yeah, because there's no surprises in this world. That's at all. most ultimate surprise. It's the ultimate surprise. And so watching a little boy come out was one of the coolest moments of my life. That's awesome, man. But it's awesome. Super, super happy for you all. That's fantastic. So my son is eight. Okay, cool. And I know is now your son, how many months now?

Two months. Yeah, okay. So, like, he's already at the perfect age. So, like, talking to him about, like, the weather. Yeah, and stuff of, like, this. First thing you got to know is the dad is, like, you got to have the radar, like, immediately. like my dad can just whip out the radar at any moment. I'm just like, this is a cell that's coming in. It's only going to last a few minutes. Yeah. You have to know weather.

You have to know a few things about life. Sports, how to change a wool. That's true. Yeah. And my dad didn't, my dad was like, this is how to handle stuff in the courtroom. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, that was, that was his way of an oil change. Yeah.

So what was it? Can I ask you? Am I allowed to ask you a question? I don't do podcasts a lot. I don't know if you know this, but we're just chilling. Okay, cool. Yeah. So like, when you grow up with a dad,

this a lawyer. Yeah. Did you ever win any argument, like, growing up, like, if he ever, like, laid a law down or, like, a rule, did you ever try to, like, combat that rule? And did he come out at you, like, law your dad or just dad? Just dad. Okay, that's great. Just dad.

So he was able to disconnect the two. No, they're one. They're like, they're like, so I'm a fifth generation attorney. So just everybody throughout my family, through DAs, federal judges, you name it. And so you didn't win an argument. You just got taught a lesson. That's what that was. Yeah, yeah, yeah, exactly.

You had a plea deal. That's a clue I'm putting it. And so he would teach me not in terms of this is what you do. He used what they call the Socratic method, which in law school is you ask questions to teach the lesson. Whoa. And so. Like Jesus.

Exactly. So it was almost very parable-esque where he would, instead of me getting upset, and what you would hope a dad would do or get mad with you or get mad at you. He didn't really show anger. He showed disappointment, of course.

Which almost makes even more mad. Which was terrifying. You know, it was just like, oh my God, pit in my stomach. But he used a lot of questions. And so he would always... His thing was he would teach me the other side of the argument.

So if I was mad at my mom about something and I would want to come to him, I'm not going to find any comfort there. He's going to say, well, what do you think She's thinking in that moment. Now, how's your mom? What do you think she's, what do you think she's afraid of right now? Like, he would always flip it to the question.

Yeah. It didn't feel good as a kid. Sure. Because I'm like, come on. Like, you don't like. But now's a grown man. What a toolbox. Oh, my gosh.

Yeah. Now it's, I'm trying that with my son. How's that going? He's equally as frustrated about it. He didn't, he didn't really enjoy it. Now, like, with yours, you know, your dad's songwriter, singer songwriter. And did you feel like that was? just part of your natural calling, you saw it, you grew up with it.

Like, I feel like your life is just a toy box of 90s country. Like that's just like, that's what you grew up in. Definitely. I mean, my dad, I was born in Valda, Georgia, really small town, South Georgia. We had more than a Chili's, I will say that. We had a little bit more than Chili's. So a metropolis, basically. Yeah.

And then when I was one, we moved to San Antonio. Thank you. And that was my dad, my mom and dad went to UGA, University of Georgia. I played football there for a year, and then they had me at 19. And we moved to Texas. My dad did, you remember Fiesta, Texas? Do I remember Fiesta, Texas? Yeah, I didn't live there long enough to know if, like, everybody was like, you know Fiesta Texas.

Okay, so we stayed, my dad had, attorneys have to have continuing legal education credit every year. And so, which means it could be at a hotel or something. Okay. Well, we didn't have enough money to, like, go on vacation. So what we did was if you went on the CLE and brought your family, then it got paid for, by whatever the firm. Gotcha. And so we would say at the Hill Country Hyatt,

which was right next to Fiesta, Texas. And that was my vacation, only vacation, for a good solid 11 years. That was it. And it was fantastic. I bet. I was too young to remember it, but I've seen pictures.

And my dad basically got hired by some talent agency to basically go and do like George Strait covers at Fiesta, Texas. And so he did that. And I guess, like, someone was there that sort of thought he had talent. And so, moved to Nashville when I was four.

He signed a record deal with this company called Deca, and they're not around anymore. But so I moved to Nashville at four, and so I grew up in a little town called Hendersonville, Tennessee, which was like, what used to be 20 minutes north of here. Now it's like an hour north of here. Traffic. Traffic.

And so I grew up with a dad that during his like artist career, he would tour 200, 250 days a year. I mean, just always gone. And so I would. would always ask my dad, like, can I go on the road? Can I go on the road? Can I go on the road?

And I've been singing since I was like four. I mean, I could, I was like a walking jukebox in psychoppedia. I knew every song on, on country radio. And my first instrument actually was the drums. I loved to play the drums. And so I loved getting on the bus for my dad to go play whatever, you know,

fair festival he was going to play. And I would get up and play Sweet Home Alabama and you're the cute kid. Mary Jane's last dance on the drums. Nice. Okay, okay. And I just remember being like, this is awesome you know um and uh and so that kind of morphed into like i had a couple little bands

you know in fifth grade six right here like a flip flops right like a punk rock band yeah and uh my dad's brother was always a production engineer slash like front of house guy and so he recorded uh my very first album yeah in my dad's living room we recorded five songs uh played one show nice that 10 people attended and uh i knew that i always sort of had that bug i loved to to just entertain people. Like my sister and I would always, you know, make up like little skits, and my dad would film and we'd write scripts out and stuff.

And so I always... Huh? You have you and your sister? How many siblings do you have? So I've got a wide range. So my sister is four years younger than me. Okay. My parents divorced when I was nine.

Okay. Both got remarried. So my mom and my stepdad have a brother of mine. He's 21 years old, just turned 21. And my dad and my stepmother have a six-year-old son. Okay. So I have... That's quite a range.

Yeah, yeah. But anyway, you know, going through high school and stuff, I always played the talent shows. I was always like the lead and the Christmas play or whatever we did at school. And so I always love to be on stage. And I just love to make people smile and make people laugh and dance. And so when I got to college, I never really thought I could make a career of it. And so I went to Lipscomb University here in Nashville. Yeah.

Was headed towards a communications degree. Hey. But for me, it was the fastest route out. It was the easiest to major. I did marketing in business school for the same reason. Just get me out of here, please. Yeah, get me out. And then my sophomore year, my dad had completely kind of quit his artistry career

and just pursued full-time songwriting. And so him and a group of guys were having a lot of success in like the early 2000s, sort of like when Broke Country sort of entered the world like Luke Brines and the Jason Aldeens. And my speakers go boom-boom kind of. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. And so, like, they were called the Peach Pickers. That was her little writing group.

Oh, nice. Not little. They're big writing group. Right. And literally, dude, I mean, you couldn't turn on the radio for more than 20 minutes without hearing two or three songs that they had written for artists. It was nuts. That's wild.

I was, like, in some cover bands in college. And then one day, I just asked my dad. I was like, can I come sit in on these writing sessions? I just don't understand it, really. Like, I just want to watch how y'all do this. And it really is just like this. Yeah. Hanging out.

Somebody starts playing a little chord on the game. guitar and you're like hey i had this idea that i wrote down on my phone yesterday and i'm just like whoa so this is how it works and um offered up some of my you know terrible lyrics into the room and um fast forward a couple months i played a gig downtown with my dad and uh there was a guy there that offered me a developmental publishing deal nice because he thought i had some talent and um from then on dude i started writing with a bunch of other people who were just getting going and got my first cut ever with jason al-dine that was like 2011 yeah on his my kind of party album if you remember that record um yeah yeah and and and And then I started to get a bunch of cuts as a songwriter.

And then one thing led to another. I started playing for record labels, got offered a few deals and signed my first record deal at 21. And here I am 16, 16 years later. Was it like the first ones? That's my first number one song. And you've had 20 number one. 25.

Nuts. It doesn't feel real. Does everything that was going to happen? No, absolutely not. If you asked my wife, my wife was banking on it not working. Yeah. She was like, this is cute. Yeah, this is fun.

Yeah, go try your little record deal. Dude, okay, I love that because the first video I ever made, and you don't know, I'd make videos in my car. Yeah. My wife said, go be my little influencer. That was like her first thing. And so like, never make that support, yeah. Yeah, you really, she really. Yeah, it's like, ugh.

So there you go. She goes, go, go do your little artistry stuff. Yeah, so we did the premarital counseling deal, and we got married at 22 years old. And our marriage counselor, my wife graduated from the University of Tennessee. with a nursing degree. We all high school sweethearts? Sort of. We've known each other since first grade, and we dated in high school a little bit,

and then we broke up and then didn't get back together until a little bit later. We were high school sweethearts. Cool. But it sounds like you, like, wonder back, and you're like, it's always been you. It was always her. It's always her. It was always her. It really was.

So we got married at 22, and our marriage counselor advised Lauren to not pursue her nursing thing for just one year. She was like, I think y'all just really need to be together. Because the first year of your touring is an absolute nightmare. You're gone. I mean, I think we played 280 shows that year or something. So my wife rode the bus with me and my seven other band dudes for an entire year. And that year was over, she was like, I have put my time in. I'm done with the road.

But, yeah, so I put two singles out before it goes like this that did okay. But it goes like this was my first number one. And then, man, wildly, like I'm thinking about it now, I think we only had one miss. Right? There's only one single I put out radio. Is that right? Why?

During the end of my whole career. I didn't want to get a number one. Correct. Well, besides the first two. Yeah, there was one that I put out in the middle of my career that didn't go number one, but it like it streamed and sold like it was number one. That's unreal. I remember calling radio stations.

Yeah. Like, hey, can you play this? Why aren't you playing this? Oh. What's the deal? What's wrong with you? They were just like, it's just a little like not, doesn't fit. the box and I was like all right

that's fair you know agree to disagree agree to disagree but that was a lot of the songs in my career man I um on my second record dude I put this song out called crash and burn that was just super just not what country radio was playing at all and when that song went number one in a song called make me want to

it sort of carved this like weird unique lane for me where the songs were sort of so off kilter but I think people recognized my voice and so I've kind of made a living off of kind of always playing a little bit outside the lane of what quote unquote, you know, country radio is. You've definitely, you've definitely found your own. Found the lane. Yeah.

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I absolutely love them. CozyEarth.com slash Jefferson. Use the coach Jefferson. for up to 20% off. And now let's keep going. I'm going to ask you a question that this is a selfish question. Okay. So in a different life, I would have been a songwriter.

Great, you still can be. It's true. We're not done. And I can be a lawyer. There we go. Oh, let's go. We'll just switch. Switch trades.

So I grew up James Taylor, Jim Crocee. Like that was singer songwriter era. For sure. How does, when you're in that room for the first time, the, and with your dad and guys, is it like super nerve-wracking when you're around people who, know how to write songs and you're like actually i think it might be cool to add in this and they're like totally like how did they how do they politely kind of say no but no or like how does that

walk me through that process yeah but it still happens like i was i mean i don't i hate the the term professional i hold fully loosely yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah i'm walk me through that what yeah i mean the thing that we do now is if we if we hear a line from someone who even is a great songwriter. And they say something and we're like, oh, that's cool.

That's it. You know what I mean? That's like the polite way of saying that's not the line. Yeah. Oh, that's cool. That's cool.

That's cool. Yeah. Anyway, you know, but when you're an unexperienced writer like I was in that room, even just having the courage to speak is what is horrifying.

I mean, it's like stepping on the first tee box at Augusta. It has to be. You know what I mean? I think of like when ever I see, um, any bluegrass circles. Yeah.

You know, and man, if I was, I might have to jump in on a, I would just be terrified if like you're going in there. I will say that's more nerve-wracking. If you're just kind of an okay guitar player

hopping in with a bunch of professional bluegrass players, I just wouldn't play. But in a writing room, so you have a little more, it's different. It's a little bit, okay, it's more laid back there. Yeah, because you just physically can't be as good as those bluegrass guys. I feel like in communication, we say,

yeah, that's crazy. Like, things that aren't crazy, but we don't want to say that's most of my conversations with a stranger you know what i mean you don't want to say like that was kind of useless information i don't know what to do with that whoa yeah that's crazy that means i could care that's exactly that's it's saying thank you for the nothing you just gave me is what it really but it's like similar it's very similar thank you for that help that heaping help of nothing but i do think with songwriting everyone has their own unique style i mean just like in law i would imagine not every lawyer goes about the courtroom the exact same way like no in the same with parenting like

Your dad definitely parented different than I'm parenting now, but I cannot wait to adopt the way that your dad parented into my children. But in songwriting, dude, everybody just has their own style and their own brand,

and unless you're writing with people that have the grace to allow you to say some stupid stuff, you're never going to get any better. Because if you don't say it, it's definitely not going to be put in the song. So you might as well to say it. So we start off every session

by saying, hello, there are no dumb ideas in this room. I like that. Yeah. Because you almost have to leave the ego at the door. Yeah. You're going to go through

a lot of terribleness in every session I don't care how good you are to get to something that's like that's great

and I feel that's life I would say that's life yes right now how does I want to pick that up for here you are the sun

which hits different than girls but you love your girls yeah you love your son you have all your kids yeah for me

I feel like I've lived different lives and each one I learn just a little bit more and each one I get a little bit more proud of who I am on what I'm doing and how I'm showing up.

Yeah. You find like, in this season, this stage of your life right now is your favorite. Do I feel like this is my favorite? Yeah. Yes. Yeah, I mean, yes. I'm my most true self today than I have ever been. Yeah, I love that.

And I think you're going to say that, hopefully, every decade. Yeah, you don't want to be like, oh, this is all right. Well, it was really good. I was way better dude at 25 than I don't know. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I think if you can't say that every few years and you really have not, you're not doing any work on yourself. And I think it's, you have to do, you have to continue to do work on yourself. I mean, I told my 10 year old daughter the other night and we got in the

bed and, um, she was saying something like, why are you, I'm trying to remember how she phrased this. Like, why do I get in trouble for things, but like, but like linen doesn't, our six year old. And I'm like, baby, unfortunately and unfortunately, you are the oldest. Right. Right. So with that comes great responsibility. With that comes, you're going to do things before, everybody else gets to do them. On the flip side of that, this is the first time I'm dealing with it. Yeah. You know what I'm saying?

I've never had a 10-year-old before. So I'm learning this in real time with you. You know what I'm saying? Because you know the whole model of like the youngest kid always got like less. Dude, I'm the oldest of four. Yeah. Yeah. You kind of are envious of your younger brothers and sisters.

For sure. And they were envious to me. You know, I couldn't wait to get my driver's license and just run to the store and get bread. Correct. You know what I mean? But the youngest got to just. Totally. It was me who,

Saturday mornings had to go with dad to go pick up sticks. Right. From the yard, they were still watching cartoons. But even think about how you hold your first child compared to how you hold your, for me, my fifth child. Oh, yeah. Like my first child, it was like, holy graham. Yeah, you don't want to.

My fifth child, I'm like, hey, hey, I'm mowing the grass. Come here, you know what I'm saying? It's just like you, every kid becomes less fragile and you start to understand that, like, oh, these beings, these creatures are so resilient and so much tougher than we ever give them credit for. Yeah. But the mental emotional side of it is like, Like with every kid, I feel like I just become more like, okay, I've experienced this problem before. Yeah.

We've been here. We've been through the lying. We've been through the deception. We've been through all the stuff to where now I'm like, I know exactly how to deal with this with you. Right. Whereas like the oldest kid, you're literally learning it as they're learning it. Yeah. You know what I'm saying?

It's a blessing and a curse of being the oldest child, which I am too. Yeah. And I think that's the same way with marriage, man. 100%. We've been, this will be 15 years for us. Cool. And I was, I forgot who I was talking to. Oh, thank you.

It's a huge feat. Yeah. But it has only been, even in these past two years, or I could say even in the last year, or six months or whatever, always seems to be the better version. Totally. Because, and I, who was, I forgot who was I talking to, who was like, but y'all been married 15 years. I was like, that doesn't mean you got to figure it out. Like, you need even more runway to try and figure things out. Like, it's not like, oh, you already have things figured out.

No. I'm, and I have to imagine this is like in, for you as a musician, like you're singing about the things you're learning about what you're going through right now. I get to teach things that I'm still learning. Totally. Conflict, how to handle disagreements. I'm getting a daily lesson of that every day. Yeah. And so it is, has to be this impression of you.

Do you feel like there are times when it's easier to write it in a song than actually say it to her? Sometimes. But I want to speak to something that you just. said because I feel like that is why you are having the success that you're having is because, yes, there are people that want to go to someone that has figured it all out. Yeah. But I think people relate so much more to someone that, like, has wisdom, but is also actively going through the thing that they're talking about. Right. You know what I mean? Like being able to say, I'm still battling with this, but yet here's some ways I'm working on it. Yeah.

Is now palatable for the person that has not even begun to work on it. I totally agree with that. You know what I mean? Yeah, absolutely. It's like a lot of the times I feel like the world can just focus on the battle you've been. For sure. The battle you've been in and there are times where you presented with the opportunity to say, yeah, but let me tell you about my victory. That's right. Let me tell you how I came out of it. Let me tell you how I can share of, you think that's bad. I got way worse. Yeah. And let me tell you how I got out of it. Well, just the power of testimony. Oh, of any kind. Yeah. You know what I'm saying? Yeah, to know that somebody else has already been in that with you. Yeah. Which is why I think everyone needs an old friend. The oldest of friends.

Everyone needs an old man. A dude needs an old man and a woman needs an old woman in their lives that they talk to once a month on the phone. Hands down. I have several. Yeah. I've always been like an old soul. For sure. But that, well, I definitely have some old people that I call up when things are going on. I call it, we call it in my circles of having a bucket. So you'll call a buddy and just go, I need a bucket. And that means just lay it all out there. Don't dump it all. Yeah, dump it all out there, and then you start to sift it and sort it. That's right. But you've got to hear from people who've been through it.

Otherwise, you lose it. I always feel of, makes me think of growing up, we would have our golf tournaments in high school. The reason I liked going to golf tournaments in high school was because, and I wasn't any good at golf back then, but you got out of school. But we'd go to McDonald's early in the morning, and they just came out with, I think, the McGrittle. Yeah. What a great day.

I was so good It's so good But there would always be this Like round table of old men Just meeting to talk about whatever And I just want That's what I want And more than likely they have been talking

In that same setting for 40 years At least And crazy like how the problems Or the successes continue to change Over that course of time You know what I mean? Like my wife and I have been A part of a Bible study now for eight years

Which I'm learning is very long long time to be in a Bible study. I would say, yeah, with all like the small group kind of era and everything. I mean, between our seven couples in our group, we have like 30 children. Oh, that's a lot, dude. Yeah. So like, just like homeschool them while you're in Bible study. No, no. I mean, like, literally like the amount of like effort we have all put in to be like, hey, Mondays are non-negotiable. Right. It's pretty fascinating to like look back at eight years. But like we, you know, we, I don't know if you journal or anything. I'm a terrible journaler. But like even just like, when I say, Yeah, I mean, I'm pretty bad at it.

Like, looking back at, like, what the prayer requests were. Yeah. Compared to what, first of all, what prayers were answered, and now, like, what are our prayer requests now are so different than they were seven years ago. Perspective growing. Yeah, growing with a group of people that are doing life similarly as such a blessing to me.

And I find that even, one, absolutely, too. I do that a lot with Sierra and I, the things that I can look back we prayed for a year ago, or the conversations we've even had six months ago. Totally. And the way that that's been tracked. And either things that we thought were a big deal got handled. You know,

and the things that we thought were the biggest thing that was going on. Yeah. We missed it. Isn't that so funny? Yeah. But why do we continue to think that the things moving forward are still such a big deal? Yeah.

You know what I'm saying? Like, think about all the battles you went through and now you can look back at them and laugh, but you're still sort of doing the same things. Yes. But for some reason, you can't laugh about them in the moment. Right. They still become this like world crumbling thing that when you make it through, you're like, oh, this is just like all the other world crumbling things that happened in the last decade.

Right. Are you, like, I always, I don't know the dynamic between you and Lauren of like, I'm the, it's going to be fine. She's the, we're going to have to plan out every single scenario. And she's thought about it a million times more than I ever have. Yeah. Do you find, like, how do your personalities balance each other? I'm your wife. Oh, yeah.

And my wife is you. She's just like, it's going to be fun. We're going to be good. Yeah, which I feel like that's kind of the biggest work I've been trying to do on myself is like, because I do know that my, you know, over attention to things. Like my wife would say I have a lack of attention to detail. But I have a lack of attention and detail of things that I don't care about. But if I care about them, I have like an oath.

CD attention to the detail. Like, I'm like, what are we, you know, if we're going on like a vacation, Lauren's like, we'll just figure it out when we get there. I'm like, no, we're going to Italy. Like, you have to plan Italy. You can't just, you can't just show up in Rome. We're definitely swapped. And be like, we're just going to, I don't know, we'll try this gelato out.

Exactly. Can we get on the phone with the travel agent? Yeah, yeah. Maybe in next week. I'm like, no, like today. Yeah, right. You know. So I would say I'm a lot like life.

I definitely, I'm a lot like your wife. That definitely vibes. I think this is good for our relationship. I can already see what's going to work out. Yeah. Before we keep going, I want to take a moment to tell you about Upwork. You grow, you and your business, grow not by doing more things, but by doing the right things and letting go of the rest. And I know what I struggle with sometimes in several businesses that I've begun is that delegation is a problem because I would rather sometimes spend way too long, too many hours trying to look up how to do something or work some other platform when I could have just gone down. Upwork. Upwork has a selection of, seriously, some of the best freelancers out there for everything you could possibly want to do. I'm talking about data and analytics, software and development,

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Let's keep going. I want to talk for a moment on the idea of you've had a lot of songs about women, marriage, specifically a woman, your wife. And you almost in some way become a model for marriage in culture, in news or whatever celebrity is. How hard is that? What's that like when you feel like, hold up, wait, we're just as normal as everybody else. And all of a sudden, we're, people actually care more about our marriage than actually being in it. Yeah. It's a, it's a weird. juxtaposition you know i was actually having this conversation earlier um but like when you know being in the limelight quote unquote or being like a quote unquote like celebrity yeah you you know

you know the world sort of develops this um this framework that you that you that they pin you under you know what i'm saying they decide for you they kind of decide for you of just kind of like if you were and maybe i'm wrong on this but i would like to think that if you went out if you went out in Nashville right now and polled a hundred people but hey when when I say the name Thomas Rhett what do you think of they'd be like oh his wife yeah you know what I'm saying right okay what else his kid his beautiful kids yeah yeah yeah like okay what else music no you know what I'm saying maybe doesn't he sing doesn't he sing exactly and so and maybe I'm wrong on that but I would I would like to believe that that is more than likely what people will think of when they think of me and so it's like it has been

this interesting kind of change especially like you know social media has been around for a minute now, but now it literally is all, like podcast, social media is our way that we, that we project. This is the way we, you know, market all the stuff. And so for me, it's been interesting to find this balance of like, okay, well, when I post a picture of like my family on Easter Sunday, it's going to get a she load of engagement. Right. But if I post a picture or a video of a new song, maybe it's not going to connect as much. And so for me, I have to find this like weird balance of like, but I still do this for a living. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know what I'm saying? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Because I think people have sort of labeled our family like, I mean, couple goals. Yeah. You know, dream family goals. Right. All this kind of stuff. And so when that is your perception, you sort of innately come back in your house. And when things are not going well, you're like, you kind of in your mind go, but I thought we were the perfect family. Right.

I thought I was the perfect husband. Exactly. Everybody thinks I am. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Everybody says I am. Everybody says I am. Yeah. And so it is fascinating, dude.

because we live such a normal life. Like, as normal as we can. Yeah. To have done the things that we've gotten to do. Yes. I would like to think that we are very normal. I understand that some of our ways of traveling are different. Right.

And some of the places we stay are different. But, like, I feel like we are so insanely normal. And my kids think that we are so insanely normal that when we go places and people want to take pictures with me and our kids are just like, what the frick is happening now? Yeah. Right. My six-year-old was like, why these people like you? Yeah, I've had that. And I'm like, well, you know, do you know that I sing?

Right, exactly. I mean, yeah. Yeah. But like, and? You know what I mean? And so, like, I'm trying in this season to, like, kind of really teach my kids, really what do I do for a living? Because it's fascinating if you were to ask your kid, hey, what does daddy do for a living?

Right, exactly. I'd be curious to hear their response. We always say, Daddy just helps people. That's it. Right. Because when they stop and my daughter's very vocal and she'd be like, do you know her? Yeah, exactly. You know what I mean?

And I'm like, well, kind of. Yeah. Yeah, we know each other, and daddy holds, you know, like, but that's kind of... But they also think, like, my kids think that because I'm a singer, that I just have everyone's phone number. Oh, I love it. And that, and that whoever can come over for lunch tomorrow. Right. Oh, there we go.

You know what I mean? Yeah, I get that. Last, I think it was last week, or maybe it was Easter Sunday, one of my kids was like, do you think the Jonas brothers are going to come tomorrow for Easter? And I'm like, no? No, probably not. There's a marshmallow coming? Yeah. And I'm like, yeah.

And so I'm trying to, like, I'm trying to like, I'm trying to like, I'm trying to come to, like really take them through the wheeze of like what i actually do for a living yeah like singing is this much of it right writing is this much of it yeah uh planning meetings are this much of it all the stuff and so now that they they're starting to understand that oh my job is more than just singing now all of a sudden my kids are like my 10 year old other night was like well i want to be a designer and i'm going to design design dresses i want to be the CEO of my company i was like where do you learn the word CEO she was like i'm going to live in paris for a year oh there then i'm going to move to london and i'm going to have eight kids yeah yeah yeah that's awesome

Perfect. And how old is she? She's 10. Yeah, I love that. Yeah. I love that. My six-year-old last night was like, I think I'm going to move to California for a little bit. And then maybe, if you're still in Tennessee, maybe I might come say hi.

Yeah. And then I was like, okay. Yeah. She's already thought this way out, way farther than I need to. I was like, you mean you're not going to stay with me? Yeah. Like, she's like, no. Totally.

Why would I do that? But no, back to your question. I think it's just like perception versus reality is a tough battle. Yeah. I'll share like mine. I will, here I have a platform where I talk about how to have good communication and how to handle conflict and arguments in model recovery. And how do you repair after an argument?

And then it's really easy to get into a disagreement because you're married to another human. And it's like, well, okay, Mr. Communication Expert. You know what I'm saying? And then it's like it has to be hard. too of here y'all are put in this hashtag couple goals and then because you're married and human you get into an argument all of a sudden it's wait we're hashtag couple goals what are we doing and then it's easy to because you got kids and it's bath time and it's whatever else yeah and i think to that there's a there's a there's a quote that says um what does it say uh blet or shoot uh cursed is the man who is a

profit overseas but a burden in his own home. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't know who wrote that, but it's pretty brilliant to me. And it's like, it's like what kind of capacity and what space are you giving to use your talents in your workplace, but not for sure in your house. Was it Paul? I think it was, it might have been like in Romans. I think it was a romance.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. What a guy. What a pal. What a fellow. But yeah, dude. I mean, it's, it's like, it's so easy for like me to sit here with you and just be like the nicest dude in the world. Right.

But if I can't take that mentality and bring it back into my house, because it's like the old saying of, I want to be known and love the most by the people that love and know me the most. You know what I'm saying? That's so good. And it's like your best self in front of complete strangers, but you're your worst version of yourself in front of the people that admire and respect you the most. Yeah, there's a question I always try to ask myself, is, are my fans or my family getting the best version of me? And that's like, buddy. That is the whole, the world loves to talk about work-life balance. Yeah.

I don't believe in it. Yeah. I don't. What do you believe? I believe that you have to sort of be 100% committed where your feet are. Yeah. So if you're at home, you have to be 100% that guy. Right.

You know what I mean? Like I think that it's a slippery slope to me to be like, oh, I can take a couple phone calls. Yeah. On a Saturday. Yeah, that's hard. While my kids are playing T-ball in the backyard. Because those couple calls turn into an all-day thing. Yeah.

And then all of a sudden I find myself in my studio. writing a song that it was an idea that came to my brain. And then before I know it, the weekend is over, and I spent no time with my children. Right. Or just a little bit. Yeah. I find, I think you would be somebody who would support this.

The last year in particular, for me, I went by this idea of what's best for the business is what's best for the family and what I have gone through, man. It is bright line red clear to me of, is the opposite. What's best for the family is what's best for the business of like what you're doing right now. What's best for your children? And Lauren is what carries through everything else and how different that is. 100%. Because think about it like this. Like if your job, I'm trying to word this right, if things are right in the home, right? And like you're spending not quantity time. You're spending

quality time with your family. It could be super limited too. Right. Like even if you only get a couple hours a weekend, but it's like very, very, very intentional. That's so much more than you just kind of being there for a week. Just half in it. You know what I'm saying? And so like if your wife feels loved and known, if your kids feel loved and known and seen, all of a sudden when you walk out the door to go to go to work, your family's going, go get them, dad. Right. Compared to, it's that thing. Yeah. Like he's going to do the thing that continues to take away from us. Right. So it makes sense. No, I'm right there with you, man. I'm talking. Because I've, I've lived that too. Before we get going, I want to take a moment to tell you about Element, which, as my kids call it, salty water.

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That was such a bad dad joke. Head to drink element.com slash Jefferson to try it risk-free. That's drinklm-n-t.com slash Jefferson. Let's keep going. I've heard you speak on kind of this transition of things you didn't do as well in marriage and relationship and family. And now you're at a place where you feel like you do well. So what is the thing?

in your mind you felt like you had to unlearn to be where you are now? I was on the phone. I hope she's okay with me sharing this. And if it's not, y'all can just. Yeah, we can cut it out. Whatever. But I was on the phone with Miranda Lambert the other day. Yeah.

She's kind of weirdly always been, not weirdly, she's been an amazing friend ever since I started in this business. Oh, that's cool. I was kind of seven or eight years behind her, so she's always been doing it eight to ten years longer than me. Yeah. So she's always had a 10-year sort of wisdom gap. ahead of me or whatever, and I called her the other day,

just talk about music, the road, touring. Like, at what point do you, like, not do a 50-show tour? Like, at what point do you decide? Maybe we can't sell 20,000 tickets. You know what I was? We were having this conversation, and they started talking about, man, I just feel like I end up just saying yes always,

for the sake of more. And she said, let me just remind you that there's no social thing as a country music emergency. That's good. And I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I freaking love that quote, because it's not just a country music emergency. Yeah.

She was like, you're not a doctor. Like, you're not going into a heart transplant tonight. You're got, you're not curing cancer. You're literally deciding, should I do this podcast or should I not? Yeah. You know what I mean? And when you really zoom out a thousand feet, you kind of go, oh, that's really not a big deal. Yeah.

And more than likely, there will be another opportunity to do something else down the line that matches up better with my schedule. And so I think, The thing that I had to unlearn is that if I said no, eight to ten years ago, which I didn't say no, eight to ten years ago, it was always a yes. I've had to unlearn that just because it's a good opportunity doesn't mean it's the best opportunity. Yeah.

And so I've been very, very fortunate with such an amazing team. Right. That sort of knows where my rankings are on my, like, family work stuff, to where it's like they have done a great job. but just presenting me with a lot of different options. I mean like, hey, we believe that this is great. We believe that this is a lot of good exposure. We believe this.

And so they present the options. And then we haven't done this great, but we have now started trying to do once a month sitting down, not just with me, but with my wife. Because I'm not a good communicator. I'm one of those people that will say yes to a million things and get super fired up about this thing and supervite up about this. And then I get home and I'm like, oh, I really need to talk to Lauren about this stuff.

But as you know, when? Yes. When are we going to do that? Yes. When we get in the bed at night? Yeah, yeah, yeah, it was happening. Are we going to do that? Are we trying to watch Silo, season three?

You know what I'm saying? And it just ends up not getting talked about. And then by the time that whole busy week that we plan gets there, right. Everyone's in shock. You know what I'm saying? Yeah. My wife goes, when did you plan all this?

I'm like, oh, a couple months ago? Yeah. She was like, well, I didn't, I mean, we don't have a babysitter. I'm like, oh, shoot. And then I just scramble. And then I just scramble. and then I become this like very unreliable person. Does that make sense?

Dude, I lived that, okay? Okay, okay. Yeah, like in the last six months, all right? Because what would happen is they would say, of course, my scale, much smaller on tour and everything else. Of they'd ask me, can you be on this show, podcast, whatever? And I go, yeah, yeah, yeah. And then, or I'd say, hold off. And then I'd ask Sierra, and she'd be like, oh, that's Ruby's dance recital.

You know, like, or this is not a dancer song, but like, this is a program at school. I'm getting stressed out. Yeah, and I'm like, oh, it is, okay. And then I'd have to go tell somebody that's not a good date, and then they'd have to come back with a different date. And it was like, they just put me in a impossible position. And so what we've done is now Sierra is like the number one filter.

Yeah. Of protecting her job is chief number one of like any schedule things, any publicity things. any of your stuff like that once a month meeting or whatever, it all runs through her. And so it's, I don't let me make a scheduling decision because her brain has the capacity to handle all the tabs. For sure. And open and that just makes my life and our life like that much better

when we're able to do that. Yeah, 100% man. I do have to tell you this number one song that gets played on my house is you're nothing else with Forrest Frank. Oh, sick. Dude, my kids love. We all. Every morning.

Same. Every morning is for a string. Same. And so I have to say. There's not much like inspiring music out there that feels like you're listening to Fettywop at the same time. You know what I'm saying? You can just blast on a Monday morning. Right, right.

It's just age appropriate for everybody. Yeah, exactly. And so I'll be making eggs just going, man, I don't know. This is. That's right. Yeah. I do have to say, I am encouraged and proud to see what I have seen. and that is more leaning into your faith

and being more, I think just more God-focused in your message, and I think that something, as somebody watching from the outside, man, I'm so proud, dude. I think that's just awesome because that's hard. That's really hard of like, what do you, what if you're not the Thomas Wrett that people fell in love with 13 years ago or whatever?

And, like, you're in these different life, stages and phases and you're in different phase of marriage and everything and some a lot of that too is faith for sure yeah man it's you know it's it's always been a part of me i mean ever ever since i was young like i mean i think i got i got baptized when i was eight i'm not totally sure i knew what it meant yeah i think when i got married like right at that age yeah and then but i don't mean i've always believed but i don't think that my like faith got really real until i was like a sophomore in college and then you know when i got on the road it was always a part of me but it never was as like um never was as vocal yeah you know um and for some reason i don't know what it is

about the human brain turning 30 like do you know the science behind is like is my brain fully developed now yeah i don't think so i think i think we're just coming online yeah i don't i don't know if it was it was either turning 30 or me turning 30 during covid you know covid warped me. Yeah. Like in the worst way and in the best way humanly possible. I think that like that year, as hard as it was, God did so many things in my life that year that I did not know they were happening

while they were happening. Right. Even just like that year, I felt like so much of my identity and what I did was completely stripped away from me. Mm-hmm. You know what I'm saying? Yeah. I was talking to Harry about this other day, but the things that we did for money that

year were so hilarious. Yeah. Like the sponsorship deals we did, I played on Zoom calls for corporate companies, like 10,000 people, and you can't see any of them. They're just in your basement alone. Just jamming. And they would like unmute it and you would hear like that, you know, and you're like, what the frick are we doing? What's happening? But, you know, when you were in the middle of COVID, you really, I really did not believe that we were ever going to ever be able to go do anything ever again.

Like I was so warped. And but God, like every month would just keep stripping me and keep stripping me and keep stripping me. and keep stripping me and just remind me like, hey, first and foremost, you're a husband. Hey, first and foremost, you're a father. Hey, first and foremost, you're a son, you're a friend,

and then comes this thing. Singer. Right. I was at a conference last week. You ever heard John Maxwell speak? I have. Buddy. Like, I don't know if you're a fan or not,

but like the way that he kind of presented this to me was pretty wild, or maybe not to me, but it was just like as part of a conference and he was just like, I guess when he was kind of getting going early on in his career. He had a mentor that flew out to meet him.

And he was like, hey, John, and, you know, it sounds like things are going pretty well. You know, a lot of people are coming to church and all that kind of stuff. He was like, yeah, and it sounds like when you deliver sermons, people like it a lot. And they're like, yeah, we're getting a pretty good reaction, you know? And he was like, I bet you think you're pretty amazing, don't you?

It was like, I don't know. He was like, let me remind you, you are not amazing. Yeah. You're not amazing. Your gifts are amazing. but those gifts were given freely to you. And that was a huge message that I felt like I learned during COVID is like, I guess it's me, it's my voice, it's my songs, it's all that stuff,

but those are all gifts that were given to me freely. You know what I'm saying? So good. And so I don't even remember what we were talking about, but I guess like after COVID was when I just sort of, I couldn't really not be vocal about my faith anymore. Yeah. And I'm not a preacher by any means.

You don't got to be, man. I'm not a preacher. You don't got to be. You just got to follow him. But the more I read and the more I walked, just more intimately with the Lord, it just started flowing out of me differently than it had before COVID. Well, I know you have a lot of music that's inside of you still and things that I think you're going to bring out and it's not going to be you. It's going to be your gifts that do it.

That's right. I'm going to look forward to watching it, man. Thanks, man. Yeah, thank you, buddy. I really, really appreciate it. It was just all the best to you and your family, and especially your new son. Thanks, congratulations. I appreciate it.

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