The Joe Rogan Experience - #1072 - Joey Diaz

Episode Date: February 1, 2018

Joey “CoCo” Diaz is a Cuban-American stand up comedian and actor. Joey also hosts his own podcast called “The Church of What’s Happening Now” available on Spotify.

Not show up, so I'm flying him out after Luke Rockhold. I'm going to do a podcast with him with subtitles in Spanish, and I'm bringing him up here on Friday. What? Yeah, I got a company to do it for me in Spanish with subtitles. And then I'm going to bring him up here on Friday, and we're going to have a three-way about Cuba and what it was like to wrestle and the whole thing, if you don't mind.

I don't know if you mind. So I'll do mine about subtitles just in Espanol. So no, it will not clash with you. Dude, the three of us together would be the greatest podcast ever. Because I can interpret and you would be a real MMA.

You could really talk about underhooks in Russia. That's a fantastic idea. Early training in Cuba where they shipped them. Because they shipped you off when you were a young kid. They do? That's what a lot of people don't know. Yeah, they look at you and they go,

Pelotero, you don't have a choice. They look at you and they go, Duarte Luchadero, and that's it. Now they take you at a certain age or they either send you to Nicaragua or Russia. And you train. And that's why a lot of Cubans are judokas, because they go to Russia and learn judo. Wow.

So he's going to tell you how they shipped them off. And they don't just tell your mom, like, we're taking them tomorrow. It's always been interesting to me because the Cubans and the Russians in particular were always thought of as being very technical, really the Russians. Russians are super technical. That was what a lot of people attributed George St. Pierre's success in wrestling. You know, George didn't wrestle in college or in high school, but he trained with a bunch of Russian nationals in Montreal

and apparently phenomenal wrestlers. They have this incredible wrestling program. Like when you see, when you see Nurmagomedov, the way he mauls people inside the octagon, like what in the fuck? Like that is like a perfect example of that like style of super hard, super technical wrestling. They're so good at it. There's so many.

You see, you know, you see Lomachenko used to be a wrestler? There's a video of Lomachenko. It looks like he's doing Sambo. It looks like he's got a gi on. And it's him and some other cat. And he's like 11 years old or something like that. So his father put him in everything. His father made him.

You know who Lomachenko is, right? Yes, yes. One of the best boxers ever. Literally one of the most technically beautiful to watch boxers that's ever lived. But this guy used to wrestle, yes. he'll do this shit. This is like pretty recent. Like he showed some of his wrestling moves. But the other one was him when he was a little boy. Like he's really technical, man. He knows how to wrestle. This is legit. Like when you see the way he's moving his body,

he's not faking that. He's done that a bunch of times. And yeah, this is one when he's a little kid, man. It's crazy. It says Greco-Roman wrestling, but they're wearing a gi, so I'm not exactly sure what it is. But he gets his kid and gets behind him and sends him for a ride.

So he's always been an amazing athlete. Like, I think there's something to that. There's something to his father had an idea. It's a crazy idea. His father took him out of boxing and put him into dance for like several years. Ukrainian traditional dance style, apparently. They were talking about it on one of those HBO shows. For like four years.

I think it was the HBO show. But for four years, I think, he just danced. Can you imagine that? His father's like, you want to learn how to box? You got to dance. And now nobody's got footwork. Have you ever seen him Joey yes you've seen like this highlight reel yeah it's insane it's insane it's insane Jamie pull up a

little highlight reel because my daughter goes to ballet and 80% of the class is Russian so I was thinking about it yes that was watching the movements the last parade movement I'm like Jesus Christ if people did ballet did you and I was thinking the GSP well you know me I'm like, Jesus Christ, if people did ballet, could you? And I was thinking of the GSP. Like, you know me. I'm like, GSP probably fucking does ballet. Like, you know what I'm saying? Yeah, he would.

That's what people do. It would be good for you. It's great footwork. This guy is the wizard of footwork. It's crazy because he's like right in front of you. But he's one step ahead of you at every turn. Like, he knows what you're going to do right while you're doing it. He's moving in a way that you can't move.

He's in front of you, and then he's not. It's crazy. He's one of the most technical boxers I've ever seen. Just an amazing stylistic achievement, like what he can do with his body. His style is totally unique. I mean, a lot of guys have done it. A lot of guys have unique. I mean, a lot of guys have done it. A lot of guys have moved in and out. A lot of guys have done it.

But he's doing it at such a high level, such a high level that it makes people confused. Guys quit in their corner. They're like, what in the fuck? And I really think a lot of it probably had to do with his father's cross training, and particularly with the dance. I mean, think about how effortlessly he goes like steps around guys i mean he's got some incredible control of his feet but it makes sense that like you would learn how to move your feet in a specific way that weren't the way you weren't

learn how to move your hands in a specific way right like think about a guy like floyd mayweather right his hand combinations with his upper body they're so precise it's like that that that that right but with his legs is he as precise is he as precise moving with his legs as is with his hands or is he 60 or 70 or 80 percent lomachenko is probably perfectly proportioned for his style with his ability to move but also his ability to box and hit you well. He's got both things going on at the same time with next level angles. So that's what I was saying to you.

When you're young in Cuba, they pick you. It's not like you wake up and go, I want to be a wrestler. No, they look at you and go, you look like you could go wrestle. And like what I was hearing back from them in the early 70s was, like, they just took you from your family. Right. And that was part of your training.

You know, then they put you in their go-ahead, you know, where you train in, like, their army. Have you talked to y'all about this? Could. You will? Yeah. Like, no, we've discussed what this thing is. I already have graphics on the podcast. Whoa.

So I figured that I'd put them up, and we'll do a podcast in Spanish with fucking subtitles, like an English film, like a Jelini movie, whatever, one of those movies people think are unique. Okay, here you have it. That would be genius. Because his English is too rough for me, and I know what he's trying to say and the frustration in his face. He's trying to say, I love you.

I love you. Michael Bisbing. So now he did a tape the other day of him in Cuba waiting for Bisbing in Cuba. Oh, no. He went to Cuba. Bisbing went to Cuba? No. Romero's back. Right. He's in Cuba, but what is the... See if you can find him. Michael Bisbing.

Oh, he's nuts. He's nuts. He's nuts. He's nuts. He's fighting Rockhold now. Which is a tremendous fight on the 10th, right? That's a crazy fight. That's a crazy fight. Very good fight.

It's a very good fight. Rockhold, when he's on, is super dangerous. Rockhold made one slip up against Bisping, but fair play to Bisping. He came into that fight, regardless of where anybody ranked him, like how they felt his chances were. He came into that fight regardless of where anybody ranked him, like how they felt his chances were. He came in swinging. I think he had like 11 days notice, something like that. How many days notice did Michael Bisping get when he fought Luke Rockhold? I want to say it was something crazy low.

It wasn't much time. Luke Rockhold is very, very good. He's a beast. Very's a beast very very good his top game is insane let me tell you something i think when he fought michael bisbee i'm not gonna lie to you i think his focus was a little off maybe two in a way i think he was dating rock stars and hanging out in hollywood i think he's not dating whatever anymore now he's just fucking you know when he beat uh branch he looked great. But his jiu-jitsu's great. Yeah.

He has great kicks. He's great with his hands, his movement. Him against Joel is going to be interesting. Let's get vicious kicks, man. Now, he's four, and he's one, right? So, Luke Rockroft is number one at 185 right now? I believe so. Yeah, I think he's number one contender.

And then Joel's four. Is he four? Yeah. Great fight. And then you got Jacare's back in the mix. Ooh, Jacare with the head kick. You know what's crazy? I always say to you, I don't mean to pronounce his name wrong,

and then Ungayo, right? When he fought Stiopek. Ungano. Ungano, when he fought my man, Immigrant Mentale, like a motherfucker. Yeah, he hits hard and all that stuff like that, but now that dude's still going to be more dangerous now. He's going to fucking take that loss and come back a fucking machine. You got to think how crazy it is that he went from being a guy who was homeless to five years later fighting for the heavyweight title.

This is like a total amount of training. Five years of MMA training, fighting for the heavyweight title. And he's the favorite. He's the favorite over a guy who's already defended it twice. I mean, it's crazy. That's how talented he is. That's how terrifying he is. That's how special he is.

But a loss like that to a guy like that, like to a real champ like Stipe, that lets you realize where the top of the game is. There's a few more things to learn. There's a lot more days to get in and training. But that guy's just begun. He's just begun. Five years ago he didn't know shit. He's way better now than he was

two fights ago. I see the difference. I see the difference in the way he moves. When he fought Overeem, it was significantly different than when I saw him in his first and second fights. His first and second fights, he was very good, but just insanely strong. He would hit guys with these combinations and clean technique too, man. He's not just a physically strong guy. He's also very smart because he's learning to do everything mechanically very good.

It's not like a guy who's only been striking for like three or four years. So they look a little tight and weird, but if they land, they got a lot of power. Nah, man, everything is clean. Like you said, some digging those trenches, Jack. Oh, dude. All that type of work gets you tough, tough. He's just a special athlete. And if he keeps going, man, I mean, boy, that guy learning more.

Think about how little you learn in five years. Most of these guys have way more time in, way more time in wrestling, way more time in kickboxing. The average guy, by the time he gets to the UFC, I would like to know what the number is, like how many years of training and competing they have. But it's got to be more than two. Like he was like right in the UFC and smashing people.

It's an amazing story, man. It's an amazing story. And for a lot of people, the way it ended is a good lesson for martial artists. It's a good lesson. See, even if you were an Nganou fan, you're bummed out that he lost. I appreciate that. I'm an Inganu fan too, but I'm more of a fan of mixed martial arts. I'm a fan of an honest, like, I want to know what it is.

Like, what is this? Like, what's this contest right here? What's actually going on here? What's going on here is phenomenal athletic talent, massive potential, like a super alpha athlete versus one of the toughest guys ever who's been in the game longer, who knows more. He's wrestled. He's been fighting way more. He's been in the trenches way more times. He's had to dig deep.

He knows what it's like to be really hurt and tired in a fight See I appreciate the strategy of like how do you go into fighting a guy like perfect? It was like Rocky against mr. T. Yeah, that's what exactly was like So it was like heart and fucking a little smart stay away from that punch It had to be and I haven't watched the full fight. I was working that night. I'm on the fucking stage. My brother getting hit by Francis Ngannou

with MMA gloves is the worst thing that can happen to a person. He's terrifying. And Stipe got cracked multiple times in that fight. It's not like he didn't get hit. He got cracked.

But he had made up his mind. He was going nowhere. He knew what to do. He'd been there before. That's an incredible lesson just for the overall sport, for mixed martial arts in general. And the lesson is, like, he figured out, like, he had, like, the craziest end of video game character ever, right? Ngannou's like the big boss in a video game. They're like, fuck, I gotta play against this guy.

That's Ngannou. And Stipe figured out how to beat him, being 20 plus pounds lighter than him, way less intimidating in terms of his physical presence, although Stipe's pretty fucking intimidating. But Ngannou's so intimidating. He's so next level. 265, natural,

giant, crazy frame. What is Stipe? When you're next to Stipe, that's when you realize how big he is. It's a big fella. On TV, you don't look that big. When you're next to him, you're like, this guy's a big fuck. He's a big fuck. Watch him walk around. His asset is his mind, though, Joe. Yes, yes. It's his mind.

Come on, dog. That immigrant mentality. We talked about the Wikipedia page. Dog, I told you. Immigrant mentality with American ingenuity. Tell them about the Wikipedia page. Listen, American ingenuity is fucking brilliant. And with the immigrant mentality mixed, like let's say you're still an American,

but your dad could have called you Steve. No, he could still call him Steve Ben-Mayochik to remember where the fuck you came from. You understand me? His father came. That's really weird. Like, the other night, you know, it was on. I almost called you, Joe.

I hate calling you. I almost called you to go, when was the last time you watched Bronx Tale? Oh, you know what? It's been on all week. I watched it a year ago. When he fucking finds him with the guns and he starts smacking the kids in the neighborhood

I still remember people's parents smacking kids in the neighborhood Wow like people's parents coming on go what the fuck are you guys doing get the fuck home? Yeah, like one kid got a kick to the stomach and the father points the other kid and nobody said dick Nobody said dick dick no, I'm watching this. The biker scene. When was the last? Like, I haven't watched Bronx Town 20 years.

It's on AMC at 630. When they locked the door. Now you can't leave. He's eating and shit. And all of a sudden, he hears the bikes and shit. And he walks over. Oh, okay, nice. Like a gentleman.

Yeah, all right, no problem. One beer. And all of a sudden, they do a thing. And he walks up to the guy. You got to leave. No. Now you can right, no problem. One beer. And all of a sudden they do a thing and he walks up to the guy, you got to leave. No, now you can't leave. And Collagero, like that guy named his son Collagero.

Who would do something like that? That means you want your son to have the immigrant mentality. But when they throw that beat on the bikers, that's a true story, bro. Is it? That's a true, true story. Listen, in the 60s, you couldn't have longhand walk around the Bronx.

It just wasn't accepted. Really? Yeah. That hippie shit, that didn't happen in the Bronx in 1965. What if a hippie was walking through the Bronx? They called you dirty hair. They insulted you. They called you a bunch of shit.

And then they threw a beating on you. Wow. And it's hysterical because that scene is so accurate. Because after the adults threw a beating on you, then the neighborhood kids chased you. Like the young kids with sticks. And that's what we'd do. Wow. You know, like the little guys would chase you. Once you were beat up and they took all your money.

It's a classic scene. I was thinking about that. I'm like, actually, I got to call Joe and ask him when the last time. Look at this. Look how bad to the bone. Whether he stole it, Joe, whether he stole the scene. Look at this. You got to leave.

Your man is telling us you got to leave. Just tell him, sonny. Problem is your man here says we're not properly leave. Just tell him, sonny. Like our money ain't green. Very careful for you, too. How cool does come together sound? You got him around, right? Yeah. Oh, this is a great scene.

This is a great song, dog. I forgot about this scene. It's a perfect song, right? Perfect song. When he walks in, it starts in the beginning. Watch this. Is this going to get us kicked off of YouTube? No, no, no, no, no.

As long as we talk over it, we'll do it. Oh, okay. We're not really talking over it. Okay. This is it. Right here. Oh, you again. Uh-oh.

Very nice. Now he's got to leave. I'll tell you when the fuck we leave, all right? Get the fuck away from me. Whoa. Go watch the bites, man. Here it is. Shuts the door.

Uh-oh. Uh-oh. Now you just can't leave. I will never forget the look on their faces. All eight of them. Their faces dropped. All their courage and strength was drained right from their bodies. They had a reputation for breaking up bars.

But they knew that instant they made a fatal mistake. This time they walked into the wrong mistake. This time, they walked into the wrong bar. Come on, you stripy motherfucking cunt! This is real, Joe Rogan. This was 1968 on

fucking Jerome Avenue. Holy shit. So this is a true story? Jesus Christ. This scene is fucking brutal. This is it. This was when this was allowed. Dude.

This is craziness, bro. This was the Bronx in 68, 69. Fuck. And the neighborhood, you know, like the neighborhood would tell you, hurry up, the cops, the people on the third floor would tell you. We could see the cops on the third floor. We could see the bulls coming down the street. You're like, the whole neighborhood was in on it. You know what's interesting to me?

Like, this is all from immigrants, right? Yes. It's all our ancestors. This was what they had to do. Because if not, this also movie is about him dating a black girl. Right. And what that meant. I forgot how good this movie was.

That's right. This movie's brilliant. Yeah. Shout out to Frankie Renzulli. Yeah. This movie's a genius movie. Look at this. Watch my car.

You know. Chaz Palminteri's great in this fucking movie. This is it. This was it. This was it. I forgot how good this was. Now, see the young guys? Now that's us, right?

We're seeing what's going on. Now you take this guy and we would fuck him up, dog. This is crazy. This is like animals. Yeah, this is it. I mean, if we would fuck him up, dog. This is crazy. This is like animals. Yeah, this is it. I mean, if you really stop and think about it. This is it. This is how you were raised.

Italian immigrants, Spanish immigrants. Oh, my God. This is crazy. Crazy. When you think about their one generation removed from people came off a boat. Let me tell you what the other side of this. Here's the other side. Like, all right, the big thing was as we came to move here, Let me tell you what the other side of this. Here's the other side. All right.

The big thing was as we came to move here, I remember he would come to the store, Frank Starr. Mike Starr was your friend, and he would come to the store, and there was a big rumor that Chaz stole these stories from him and put this together. And there was like this little war going on, but not really. From Frankie Renzulli. From Frankie Renzulli. The other gentleman. There was somebody else that was his roommate that turned out to be somebody very big.

But there's a story one time that a biker dude owed Gravano money and Gravano was hitting him and he fell off the sidewalk and broke his leg. So Gravano one night went out and fucking did something like this. Something like with 20 guys, they beat up 8 bikers. I don't know how true it was. But I still remember being 5. and did something like this, something like with 20 guys, they beat up eight bikers or something.

I don't know how true it was. But I still remember being five. Like if I could think, if you could hit me with truth serum, I could go back to being 1968, 1969 in the Bronx. My daughter's five, and my mother would send me from the dry cleaner that she owned to the corner where there was an Italian place that had slices and Italian ice and shit like that. Like, I was allowed to walk to the corner at Mercy's Edge on Tremont Avenue. Like, I think about it. I was looking at my daughter when I was watching Bronx.

I'm going, how different has time changed? Like, I was allowed to go to a liquor store with a note and get my mother Marlboro Reds and bring them back. In that neighborhood. We didn't live there. My mother just had a dry cleaner, and up there was a bookie numbers joint. That's why we had the dry cleaner. We were partners on the dry cleaner. You didn't know that.

No. That's why I got scars on my face. I got bit by a German shepherd as a kid. Those three by one of the eyes, that's what we did. When we came from Cube, I lived on 205 West 88th Street. And after my father died, my mother had a dry cleaner. And that's where we were up. We were up in Jerome Avenue and Tremont and Grand Concourse,

and we had a dry cleaner. And every weekend, I would go up there, and I would sit there with the fucking, I how to dry clean and had black Mike black Mike was the guy that I and everything but he made the best spaghetti in the Bronx so even Italians came to eat black Mike spaghetti really yeah this was uh I knew all that shit when I was a kid. Because when you have a numbers operation, you have to keep moving it around. Right. The cops can't.

So you have to, every three or four weeks, you have to move it around. Explain the numbers to people who don't know what that means. The numbers is the paramutual. It's the last three numbers are the paramutual of the track, which is the amount the track made for the day. which is the amount the track made for the day. So if the track made $686,482, the number for the day is $482. And it comes out as the Brooklyn number. So there's three numbers a day.

There's Brooklyn, the Bronx, and New Jersey. But what happened was that was a big business until the 80s, until the lotto came out. Then the lotto cut that in half. But before that, that was all put in little different immigrant neighborhoods all over New York City because as immigrants, we all want hope. We want that money to get that refrigerator and the stove and shit like that. It's such a weird thing that they would gamble. Just $2 a day.

Remember, $2 a day wins you $1,000. Yeah. I could do a lot in 1975 with $1,000 with two kids. My grandmother was obsessed with the numbers. Yeah. She was obsessed. And she would always have like a number in her head that she thought it was going to be.

And it was like one off or something like that. It was like these stories she would tell you. What would you say to her? What can I say? I was like five. I just remember it very distinctly. My grandmother went to jail for running numbers. In New Jersey?

She wouldn't rat them out, so they put her in jail. So she made sweaters, gave sweaters to the guards. Mrs. D, she's the nicest lady. How did you feel that your grandmother had done time? What did you think? We didn't find out until I was probably like, I wonder when I found out. I think maybe I found out in my teenage years. And I was like, what?

What the fuck? People would go to see her. Like, where is, I don't want to say my grandma's name out of respect, but people would say, you know, where is she? And she's, oh, she went to visit her cousin, or she went to see her aunt. And she was, you know, she was in the pokey for, like, six months. I forget how much time it was, but every time we would go over there, there was, like, some new excuse. See, in New Jersey, they put you in jail for gambling. In New York City, they don't.

They give you a ticket. You know, they would give you like a ticket and shit in those days. I don't know what it's like now. This fucking, they'll throw you in jail for weed now in New York City. I don't fucking know. My grandmother was one of the few people I've ever known where I legitimately thought they had intuition. She has weird intuition. She would do things.

It was real weird. Like when my mother was a kid, there was a rainstorm. It was like a real bad rainstorm. And for whatever reason, my grandmother decided to wake my mother up, take her out of her bed, and bring her downstairs.

Some crazy hunch that she had. The ceilings collapsed. Like right above the bed where my mom was sleeping so like pieces of you know it wasn't a lot it was just chunks of plaster but like you know three or four pretty significant pieces of plaster fell off of the ceiling it was rain came through it the whole deal like the ceiling gave out somehow or another she had this idea in her head and it could be because she knew that the ceiling was fucked up and she knew it was raining hard, and it was probably going to give in anyway.

Or, she might have had intuition. Everyone was always convinced it was intuition. Everyone was always convinced she's a little bit psychic. It was always weird. It was always weird around there. She had a monkey. Did I tell you about her monkey? She had a monkey, Chi-Chi. In New Jersey?

Yes, in Newark, New Jersey. She had a monkey named Chi-Chi. And Chi-Chi would bite everybody but my grandma. My grandfather made her keep the monkey in the attic. Yo, my grandma was crazy. She had a monkey. It would open up packages of gum and chew gum. Do you know how or where the fuck she got it from? She bought it.

She bought a monkey. Yo, I'm telling you, my grandma was crazy. Listen, Italian people had butchers in those days, and they'd get you anything. Alligator, pigeon. She kept a monkey in the house, man. Do you understand how crazy this is? Do you remember the monkey? Yes!

Chi-Chi! The monkey's name was Chi-Chi! Did he bite you? No, he never bit me, but he bit my sister. He bit my sister. Yeah, Chi-Chi would fuck you up. I think he bit my sister. I think he tried to bite my sister. I think Chi Chi would fuck you up. I think he bit my sister. I think he tried to bite my sister.

I think it was one of those things. He might have bit my cousin. Someone in our family got bit. Where was she from, though? I never touched him. I couldn't even get close. Was that the Irish side or the Italian side? No, the Italian side.

Yeah, they're nuts. She was crazy. And once you give, no disrespect, but once you give those lunatics that option that they do have intuition, you're done. You're fucking done. They start giving you the fish eyes. Dude, don't do shit. You got to listen to them. Her cooking was from another planet.

It's from another planet. It was like pure immigrant cooking. Like the pasta, the lasagna. You just sit there and go, holy shit, just perfect. Just knew exactly what's supposed to be in there. She'd bake her own, like she would make her own macaroni. She'd make her own ravioli. She would stuff her own ravioli.

She'd be out there rolling and flattening out flour and shit. Throwing the flour on top of it, flattening it out. She was a wizard. Don't you get a monkey call a cheat? Just out of respect. A little monkey and keep it here, dog. Out of respect for grandma. My grandma was a special lady. She was powerful. Yeah, once you give those

like I, listen, when I was a kid, man, I went to my buddy's judo school. I didn't join. I just went down there to see what it was like. And it was hidden in Union City. It was on 7th Street. But I knew that my stepdad played cards on 9th Street on Wednesdays. Wow.

Okay. I knew my stepdad played cards down there. They played Baccarat. Okay. And they'd gamble in this little club. And I had to be maybe 10, but because I grew up how I grew up, with the numbers, I always had my eyes out as a kid. When I went to judo that night at the end, I got in the bus to go back,

and I noticed unmarked police cars. And I went home that night, and look, bro, you know me, dog. Get Christy Love used to be a show on ABC about a black chick that knew martial arts. They tried to capitalize on her with her sister. And she was good-looking with an afro, and she was a cop. And she'd come in and do karate moves. So on Wednesday nights at 9 or 10 o'clock,

you caught me at home watching Get Christy Love. I'll never forget that my stepdad was leaving that night. And for some reason, I go, you gonna play around tonight? And he looked at me. He was getting dressed, a suit on. He had like the Billy Bats suit on and shit. You're going to play cards with five men.

Why are you getting dressed to the nines? Right. And I said to him, I said, hey, man, today I went down there to go to Martin's Judo School. And I saw a bunch of unmarked cards down there. If I was you, I wouldn't go out to that. And he fucking just looked at me. He said, I love you, and he walked down the stairs. He got in the car, started it, opened the garage, bro.

And 10 minutes later, I heard the car turn off, and the garage closed, and he came up, and he goes, I think you're right. And he made Sundays for me and him, and next morning, that card place, it got raided. So now they would listen to me when I was excited I had these fucking morons under my spell but you want me to tell you what else I did Joe Rogan like this is me and like me and my stepdad had this weird relation I got to an age where I wanted my mother

for myself you know what the feeling is Joe Right. We've all gone through it when you lose a dad and your mom remarries. There comes a day that he's not going to tell you what's going on anymore, and you know what? I just want you to know that I'm the motherfucker that runs this joint. You might be sleeping with my mom, but I run this motherfucker. So once I gave him that advice, like it for a while there him and i were going to float i kept stealing his coins from the sandals he had this san lazaro thing and that was everything to him so he had this big bottle of like scotch that was empty and he would put silver dollars

in there and i would steal him and from time to time he would come home and go that bottle's looking light somebody's stealing mike i destroyed his mind for years because he was a very particular man so he had different bundles of money i gotta tell you something i respect him today because i saw him get out of the joint and i saw what he did with bookmaking and how he became partners on a butcher shop. Oh, he started businesses? He started different businesses. So after I saved that night with the Baccarat, he would listen to me. And then one day I went and I signed up for Biddy Basketball in Union City. And they used to give, you know, like now if you sign your kid up, you've got to pay $80.

Right. In those days, you just show up with an address. Right. And they gave you a T-shirt. They put you on the team, and they gave me a number. They said, like, Union City Department of Recreation. It was a purple shirt. My number was 57.

I walked in the house, and he goes, what do you got there? And I go, oh, I joined the basketball thing. And he goes, what number is it? And he goes, 57. Cubans, again, are very superstitious. 57. He goes, put a number on that and he picked up the phone I go 5 he called

some guy and he goes give me 557 for $10 guess what happened Joe Rogan the number came out now I really had him under my spell right get the fuck out of here I had this motherfucker at the age of 12 so he would listen to me and shit

how old was the guy? My stepfather, Juan, at the time, was 47. Did not drink. Can you imagine? Did not drink. Did not do drugs. Carried a straight razor, Joe Rogan. A straight razor to cut people with?

Yeah. He used to wear carpenter pants with the straight razor. At this point, the guy had money. He would have a gold chain. He'd wear a Chinese T-shirt, which a lot of people do not know what it is. That's what real pimps wear. They're silk, handmade shirts from China

that you wear, and they have three little buttons. But when you're a real motherfucking Spick, you cut those buttons, and you get your initials, and you put them in gold with diamonds in it. That's how Spicks ran in those days whoa and uh once i had him there joe rogan i had him he trusted me he trusted my eyes so one night we're in union city and i fucking went somewhere and on the walk back there's a place called pastoral music and it was next to the new moon chinese restaurant and i saw a bunch of unmarked cars.

And I'll never forget that I went back to the bar, and I told him, I said, dog, I saw three unmarked, like I had him. Right. And I go, I seen three unmarked cars up the corner. He was very always scared of the phone. Even though he was a bookmaker, he never used a phone, Joe Rogan. Never used a phone, and he would never have a conversation close to a phone. This is because he always felt he did not like phones.

He did everything like a pigeon. He would write the numbers on a little piece of paper, real small, and fold them up and put them in his hat. And if he ever saw cops, he would just eat the piece of fucking paper. He didn't give a fuck. He always had the piece of paper somewhere close. Sometimes he would put it in his ring. This motherfucker was a savage, dog.

Oh, my God. So that night the cops were going to jump on us on the bar. But it was for a drug thing. It wasn't for him. But when I went back, I told them, listen, the cops are up the corner. And me and him, he grabbed me by the hand, and him and I walked from 29th and Bergen Line to 58th and Bergen Line down to Hudson, telling different bar owners that there was going to be a raid. Like, that's how untrustworthy he was of phones.

And by the time we got back to the bar, we got raided. And there was a dude in there. His name was Monina. Right? Monina is those crazy Cubans that are abacua. Monina means good man. Like, you're my bro. Yeah, they're abacua.

What does that mean? They don't eat pussy. Oh. They don't eat pussy and they fucking, you can't fuck around with animals because of St. Lazarus and all that shit. Oh, they have a very specific religion? Yeah, they have. It's a manhood. They were longshoremen in Cuba. Wow. And they maintain

order. So if you fuck up, they come over and fuck you up. But he had a wig. I'll never forget this. The guy Monina had a wig and the cops were there and they threw him. I'm like 12, dog. I'm up against the wall. They're searching me, too. They're searching my stepdad. They got my mom and they went to Monina and they threw them and i'm like 12 dog i'm up against the wall they're searching me too they're searching my stepdad they got my mom and they went to monina and they searched him and the

cop looked at his wig and he goes check the wig and they pulled the wig off and he had a little aluminum foil with cocaine oh my god oh my That's hilarious. That whole bookmaking numbers world is fucking nuts that I grew up in. I love it still. I love it. I wonder what it's like now. There's no business in it. Well, it's unfortunate because you think about how many bets are placed. Oh, Jesus Christ.

I mean, there's so much money. There's so much money out there. People love to gamble. Fucking games. When games are on, people love to gamble. What do you think is spent this weekend? Jamie, come on, Jamie. But here's my question, Joey. Like, why is that a problem?

Like, what's helping us by letting them regulate that shit? Like, why? Why do you have to have a license to gamble? Why? You know, if you think someone's not paying their taxes and you can prove it, is it because it's money?

It's cash that's being thrown around mostly? Like, why is that an issue? The government's not getting their peace? It seems ridiculous that grown adults could tell other grown adults they can't gamble. But you can here. But you can't there. Oh, gambling is one of those things like legalization of marijuana, like legalization

of fucking cocaine, like legalization of anything, bro. You know what? There's going to be fucking winners and there's going to be fucking losers, my friends. Two years ago, Connecticut did an expose on 60 Minutes about women who have just lost their fucking minds gambling at Mohican Sun because they installed, no disrespect to Mohican Sun or casino industries, they installed these type of slot machines that could just fuck with your mind. What? So these women were going down there and losing fucking mortgages, houses, you know.

Sounds like a John Waters movie. No, dog. It was just something that, listen. That's crazy. Listen, let's get something out of the way here. The biggest percentage of degenerate gamblers are usually women. Really? Let's look this fucking percentage up here.

Wow. Women go fucking deep. It's a fucking deep. It's a fucking hole. They don't give a fuck about nothing. They fucking play cards. Women fucking bang it out. And they bang it out while you're at work, Joe Rogan, while I'm at work.

They start with a horse. Then they go to this. You know, those little tours they do in Jersey. When Atlantic went you know when Atlantic City was Atlantic City you went to Union City right you pay 15 bucks to get on a bus they gave you a coupon book and when you get to Atlantic City give it $15 and quarters back so they're basically driving you to fucking gamble and drive back I believe in gambling I believe in making a living I believe that it's an itch. It's an illness, whatever.

But when you're losing your house, there's got... That's where... I want to know where... That's where it bothers me. It's just like cocaine. It's just like drug abuse. It's just like the opiate problem. It's just like anything fucking else. It could fucking... You and

I both know people who have lost their fucking lives gambling Okay, you've seen people in pool halls. You see how they get your rogan There's no difference in the drug addict than the gambling addict not at all. No difference It's just as scary too because they're conscious It's like if you see the drug addict you see him he's shooting up or whatever it is and you see him conscious. It's like if you see the drug addict, you see him, he's shooting up or whatever it is, and you see him fainting, you go, ah, that poor bastard. But when you see

a guy who's fully in the grips of gambling, trying to figure out how to get his money back, and he's all jazzed up with adrenaline, he doesn't understand why. See, there's gamblers like Michael Jordan, then there's gamblers like Joey Diaz. There's gamblers who have the means to gamble, and that is

a fucking killer also. Like a Michael Jordan. Like a Michael Jordan. And I'm not saying nothing bad about Michael Jordan. He loves to gamble. These are just accusations that you hear that he even bets on his own one-on-one basketball games. He was very competitive. Oh, yeah.

But now how Joey Diaz was doing it, not how people. Charles Barkley lost nearly $30 million gambling, it says. Yeah. Jesus, Charles. How much money does Charles Barkley have? How many people did you grow up with that were like Joey Diaz? Now, that had the means that were 19 years old. Yeah.

Okay, and one night they put a 10-time bet in on a fucking Knick game, and they won $50. When you're 19, $50 is a lot of fucking money. That's a lot of fucking money. So now you think you got the world by the ball, so you do it again on Friday, Saturday, and now you enter this world, Joe Rogan, that gets dark. Instead of the drug addiction or the alcohol addiction, every morning you wake up like, is today my lucky day?

It's like the people who go to the 7-Eleven every day and you're trying to just get a pack of rolling papers. You're just in a rush. You just left Jiu-Jitsu. You just want rolling papers and water. And there's a guy in front of you and he's telling you, give me three 68s, four 64s, and this poor fucking whatever gives him 20 lottery tickets, and it's $118. This is what this guy's doing every day, seven fucking days a week, my friend. And he might be winning $200 a fucking week, but every week he's getting deeper and deeper into a fucking hole. Because in your mind, you think today's your lucky day. And it's never your lucky. I was in that hole when I was 19, dog. And I saw a friend lose

$80,000 when you're 18 years old and he had to get three jobs. And I never really fucked with that again. I learned that addiction. That shit left my world early. You know who's a degenerate loser gambler? Who? John Gotti. Who? He won it because they

brag. Right. That's their conversation. How much they made and how much they lost. Get away from me. You have no fucking idea. If I had fucking Michigan in the hook, I would have made $30,000. They lose $80,000, $90,000, $200,000 a weekend. The system is designed to bury the degenerate gambler.

Like from August 15th. Look at this. John Gotti's secret obsession that waged 600 bets in Scrabble and a $3,000 Monopoly buy-in. You have no idea, guys. The degeneracy. For like seven months, I played this fucking ugly game, Joe, that I would start. I knew the action. I knew that you had to bet on Monday nights and try to win. And you know what? I lost every week.

And all these people who sell you information, listen, Arch Lietzer played the fucking game and lost. Pete Rose bet and lost. Even Michael Jordan bet and lost. There's rumors that that's why he was asked to play baseball for a few years because it was a cover-up. Again, I did not write this. This is just things I hear

on the road. Everybody has a fucking... Bro, gambling grabs you fucking weird, bro. Weird. And it grabbed me for a long time. I kept thinking that was the day

and I kept betting 40 times. What's up, Jamie? If they had a problem playing Scrabble, they would call up the Parker Brothers hotline like mobsters would

to dispute the rules and have them explain what was going on. What's the fucking rule? Lamechia is a word. He's playing with not- Stamechcia is a word he's playing Monopoly stamincia is a word Joe stamincia is not a word stamincia is a word

wiki dude he told me I saw stamincia that's why they were getting into arguments garbage man what's a real word garbage man cafe you know. Oh, my God.

Gambling is a fucking nightmare. And once you get caught in the web and Joe Rogan shuts me down, then I start putting bets with Jamie. And then pretty soon, I start fucking dipping into accounts. And pretty soon, now you're done. Now you get forced into a bad hand.

I told you that I was a backer on the road for a while, my friend Johnny B. When I started making money doing stand-up, I'd put together a little bankroll, and me and him would go places and gamble. And he would win or lose. Sometimes he'd win, sometimes he'd lose. But it was just being in action. It was fun, you know, that kind of gambling. I was never good enough to like play those guys, but I could play

like people that were like my level and you'd bet like 20 bucks or maybe if you want to get crazy, bet like 50 bucks. I never bet like a lot of money gambling on pool, but it makes you think more. It makes you play like way more serious. It's good for your game. And if you can have a friendly sparring partner that you play friendly games, like maybe a race to seven for 20 bucks. So it costs you probably in any city pool

halls. I don't know what the rate is per hour, but they gotta be at least 20 bucks an hour. Once and for all, I want you to break it down for me. I walk into a pool hall with Jamie. I got 10 G's cash in my pocket. Jamie's my main man. How do I exactly make money?

And why is it that the people in the room pass money around? And how does that money get dispersed? It's real simple. Everybody puts, like you put in. I'm in for 100 hundred james my boy like it depends on who's putting it together because they might decide to just pool in all their money like everybody put in on one side pool in money and you know and and back this guy or they might be betting on the side they might not even be playing the game there's always side bets side

bets are probably more like if you had a bet, if you had a big pool game, there used to be a place called West End Billiards, I think, in New Jersey. West End. I think it was called, see if you find West End Billiards. It was a world famous pool hall. We would take the drive

from New York to go down to New Jersey to this famous pool hall that would have these serious high-level professionals play there. And real high-level hustlers from all over the country would go there for big money games. You'd go there and watch people play for $5,000, $10,000. I mean, the best in the world would be there all the time. I got to play against some of the best in the world. They killed me, but I got to play against them. Like real good guys.

You just enter the tournament. Say if you and I are in the tournament and you are Efren Reyes, the greatest of all time, or Earl Strickland, or Johnny Archer, and I'm just Joe Rogan. I barely can play. It doesn't matter. I put my money up. I enter the tournament. I can play against you.

Unless it's a huge, huge, like, where you have to get invited. So now does Joey Diaz come on the side and go, listen, I'm putting three to one odds on this? Sure. Some people definitely do. So that's a side bet. Yes. Side bets all over the place. I don't know how the pool works.

I got $100 on Archer. You know, oh, you've never seen this Diaz kid play. I got $100 on Diaz. And dudes will go, I'll take that. I'll take that. And then you just work it out. And everybody works it out. But sometimes guys will get together and back somebody too.

Like say you've got a friend that's a really good player, and this guy's coming in from out of town, and he wants to take a crack at him. Well, he wants to play $100 sets. Okay, and then you have to think how many barrels do we have? You pool all your money together. Okay, we've got four barrels. That means if he wants to play sets, we can lose four times. So you have to be able to lose a

couple, gain a couple. Like if you're going to really play a guy out, these guys would play 10, 12 hours. Then we keep going back and forth and back and forth. It's crazy. Like I've seen guys and you would see him the next day, they'd still be playing. You'd go there in the morning, they'd be playing all through the night. I don't know what the fuck they were on most likely some sort of amphetamines that was a big thing in the pool world for a while guys would just break each other with gambling it would just it would be about who quits it wouldn't be about who won it's very rarely about like you know like you would you would be you would be frowned upon highly if you left on top. So if you're ahead by 500 bucks and you want to quit me and I'm still ready to keep playing,

I still got more money, man. Let me win my money back. If you just walked away, nope, I've got what I wanted. I'm going to leave now. Like that would be, you'd be what's called bad action. What about guys? I got two kids. I got to get up at seven and go bring them to school.

You should be out in the pool hall, motherfucker. With two kids, you're not playing that kind of pool. There ain't nobody with two kids playing that level pool in pool halls like gambling and hustling. There's a pool hall. Maybe now there are. There's actually a few guys. I take that back. There's a few guys with kids that are top of the food chain.

There's a pool hall a mile from my house. Whenever I go into Hollywood now, I can't do Laurel and no more so I gotta go a long way and I get off on victory just to see it fucking always fell with degenerates I'm petrified to pull in there some places were home to me you know what I'm talking about right next to the strip club is that on victory victory right when you exit there there's a strip club right next to a pool well I know the only good one in this area. Well, I shouldn't say the only good one. The only good one I know of is House of Billiards in Sherman Oaks, like this area.

That place is great. You've been on the 101. Have you seen what that place is? You took me there a couple times to eat. We did comedy there. Remember Hollywood Billiards? You took me there on Hollywood Boulevard. It's fucking a building.

What is it now? Go there next time. What does it look like? Joe, next time I drove by and I was like, oh my God, that used to be, we did comedy there. Dude, we did comedy there. Joe took me to eat there with Ari a couple times. We played pool there a bunch of times. A bunch of times.

A bunch of times. That place was great. It's fucking done. That whole area is completely different. That's where I met Crazy Max Eberle. Really? Yeah, that dude can play some fucking pool. So when you

play Max Eberle, how much do I have to put up? Do I still put up one to one? Yeah, I would get tortured. You would have to bet that I would go to... You're never going to bet on me. A guy like Max Eberle, he's top of the food chain as far as his technique and delivery. He could win a world championship tournament, like legitimately.

He's that good. I have no chance. Like if we play 12 games, I might win a couple. I might get lucky and win a few. Maybe I'll win four. He's going to win way more. He's going to get to 12 for sure, quicker. It'd be a terrible bet. The bet would be how many games do I get to? That would be the bet.

If you say you'll never get past three, because a guy like Max Abbey can run 10 racks in a row, and I'm not exaggerating. I've seen him do it. Blam! Breaks, runs 10 racks in a row. To the point where you're sitting there. He did it in Vegas. We were all hanging out. I think it was, man,

was it Ari? I forget who came with me. Actually, you guys were going to the Italian place. Yes. That place was amazing. And that's exactly where Max was playing. He would break and run out on guys, and they would just get frustrated. They'd be like, what the fuck, man?

They just didn't get to shoot. We watched him. He was gambling some guy. And when the set was over, the guy was just pissed off. Because Max just wouldn't miss. It was crazy. Just watch him. He was gambling some guy. And when the set was over, the guy was just pissed off because Max just wouldn't miss. It was crazy. Just watch him. He's playing a guy that really just wanted to take a chance and play like a top of the food chain guy. And he gambled with him.

But just watching the difference between a kid who can play a little pool, who's pretty good, versus a world championship caliber pool player. They're so precise like his technique is so clean and his angles are perfect and he's just effort effortlessly moving the cue ball on the table to where he wants it he sees clusters and problems way in advance and breaks them up it's so high level that's my boy that's max alberly he taught me how to play pool uh not that i didn't already play it before i met him but he taught me how to play pool. Not that I didn't already play it before I met him, but he taught me how to play it way better, way better. He made my game way more technical.

He was explaining things that I was just guessing before, and he was explaining what was wrong with my approach and what's a better way to do it. He's a wizard when it comes to technique. He can make a living going from pool hall to pool hall or no way because he's that good. He's an artist too, fortunately for Max. He makes pretty cool

artwork. Some of it's probably on his Instagram page. I thought he did pool cues or something. No, no, no. Who's that friend that does pool cues? Who does pool cues? Somebody along the way said he makes like fucking 8G pool cues ivory eric crisp that's my boy eric from sugar tree somewhere somebody that's what i play with i play with his cue

his cue is uh he's a wizard man he's a guy who's like really into like the grains of woods he's really into like patterns and he thinks of like to him wood is like mesmerizing he finds like the most beautiful pieces of wood and combines them together and they have to have a certain harmonic frequency like he drops them on the cement floor just like dink dink like he wants to hear a certain sound from the wood otherwise he won't use it he's like finding logs on the side of the highway and shit and recognizing some weird hardwood that no one's ever used before. And he cuts it up and makes a cue out of it. He's a wizard.

Like his cues are for Danny. He doesn't give a fuck. He makes as many as he wants. He will, you know, sometimes I don't make them for a while. Makes him for his friends. Won't let me pay for one.

I have to, I have to pay for everything just to not feel terrible. He's like the nicest guy ever. Play some fucking pool, too. So I don't even know when this podcast started and when it began. It's on. It's happening. But it's funny. Before we started, we were talking about $4.8 billion

on the Super Bowl. Oh my God. 3% will happen in Nevada. That's it. Only 3%. So is most of it online? Online. What's that Chris Christie 3%. So is most of it online? Online. What's that Chris Christie thing you pulled up earlier, Jamie? Listen, G, online and banks. Banks. There's still people who are like, you know, they got a ton of loot.

Chris Christie goes to the Supreme Court on sports betting. Is he trying to get sports betting legalized? They passed something in New Jersey, I think in 2011, to allow betting in sports, but it's still only allowed in Vegas because of whatever law there is. I'm backing your team, Chris. All right? So he has a Supreme Court case going. Might have a few problems, but we all do.

There's 17 states also with him on this. I think they want to do it. So he opposed it? They want it again. They want betting again because they have an NHL team in Vegas, and that's always been like the logic is that there'll be some issue, whatever. You can't be betting where there's sports being played

because someone will throw the game. Everybody should be able to bet. Every city. You should be able to do whatever you want. As long as they tax you and you're... Exactly. You're an adult. What are you going to do, man? What the fuck are you going to do? And these games, though, I'm fascinated by these games you say are hypnotizing ladies and they're going crazy, losing all their money.

There was a 60-minute. They did a whole piece on it? They did a whole piece on these games that are, like, laser-ish. You know, and people were actually, but the percentage was higher amongst women because of its... So let me explain something to you. Because of its... You know, it's just uh it's like video games only gambling it's very fucking so addictive like a video game but also gambling very gambling so

that's what their beef was to remove these type of games because i'm telling you since i was a kid i always i first off I lived with my mother. She had a lot of problems. She had a lot of great issues. But she was a degenerate gambler on baseball. Between the Boston Red Sox and the New York Mets, they killed her. They killed her. And I saw the decline.

I saw a person watch two baseball games at the same time. Remember in those days you didn't have split screen and direct TV. So if you were Puerto Rican, you took one TV and you put it on top of the other TV and you got fucking NBC and you had cable when it came with the cord. Remember when HBO still had the cord to the fucking thing and it was a thing with a box that you pressed and you switched three levels? In those

days, maybe. There was no and there was no ABA package or NBA package. You got like one other game. So we would pray that it would be the Boston Red Sox and she would watch both fucking games and gamble at the same time. Not even that, the numbers.

If she had a dream about a goat, bam. If she had a dream about going back to Cuba, bam. That sounds so much like my family. If she had a dream about seeing her daughter, bam, it was a number. They would call her. They would call her at a quarter to three because she had all those contacts. So that was that gambling.

Then there was the track addiction which started at Aqueduct in the afternoon. If the sun was shining, that was an excuse to go to Aqueduct for my mother. Let me go to Aqueduct. I'll see you at three after school. And she'd be there at 3.

But the whole time she'd be scratching because the Meadowlands started at 8. So she knew she'd catch the Meadowlands at 8. So guess what happens then if you lose the 8 o'clock Meadowlands? What? You haul your ass to Yonkers with the death of death. This is where you go to before you go to a pool hall to sell your blood. You go to Yonkers Raceway.

Do you understand me? Have you ever been to Yonkers Raceway? I've heard of it. Yeah, you leave there at a quarter to one. Where do you think you're going? You're either going to sell your soul or give your blood so you go shoot pool because you're saving the day.

You cannot go home a loser. Right, right. And there's all-day gambling. Oh, my God. So that was her thing. So I also grew up in an Italian family that the mother was a joe. It was like a fucking act. It was like an act.

She had three kids. They were tremendous kids. I knew the husband. He worked for a big corporation. They drove a nice car. They were tremendous kids. I knew the husband. He worked for a big corporation. They drove a nice car. They went to church. But on Saturdays, when I go over there, I would always go, where's your mom? And they'd go, my mom plays cards with the Rogans and this name.

But as I got older one day, somebody said to me, don't. Be careful when you go over there. Why? They might shoot that lady in the head. She was like 600 pounds. I mean, when I was a kid, I was like 13, and somebody came to me and said, be careful when you go over there

because the mom's a little bit on those card games. And as I got older. Imagine being scared for your life from a card game. Imagine being scared for your life. Well, it was a different game. That's how they sucked you in. So a lot of the people, now I also grew up with men degenerate gamblers, but I know all the symptoms.

I know the itch. This thing on 60 Minutes just spoke about this addiction with a computer thing with women. That was it. That was really interesting. But I know how it fucking creeps up on you it's not a couple years ago it's called slot machines the big gamble oh so it's just slot machines in general these have a slot machines computer one yes they have an effect on women in particular maybe man the fuck up ladies how about How about that? No, dog.

Here's my take on this whole gambling thing. Like, you remember horse betting in New York? Like, you'd go to the horse. Off-track betting. Yeah, it was right there. Right there. They made that for a reason. Yeah.

I mean, they're just trying to make it legal. This is legal. Come on, this is legal. It's not legal. It's to take a piece, Joe Rubin. Yeah. No, I'm saying that. They want their piece. Have you been to a medical marijuana store recently?

No, I haven't. Okay. What are they like? If it's $60, your tab is now $76. Because of taxes? It's $16 in taxes if you buy something for $60. The thing about weed, though, is it goes so far. Think about how much, like, $100 worth of weed goes.

You could be on the moon for three days. For three days. Wow. And they're going to sell those 200 milligram stars until people go down the fucking end. Wow. Or the DEA comes in and shuts them down. They don't give a fuck. There's two.

Like if you're on Ventura Boulevard, you got to be really cool because you're done. I don't think there's anything wrong with having a limit on the number of milligrams if that's going to keep it legal. And that's also probably for a lot of people. They did create a black market. That's it. You know how much it's going to cost the stars of that dude

to stay open? How much? A half a mil. Oh my God. Because it's 70 grand just for the license sheet money. They take that paper up front They're like Led Zeppelin. They're like Peter Grant in 1975 but look the economy is gonna improve and they're still gonna kill it. Oh, no, no The economy is gonna improve kind of but I'll tell you what how much are they gonna take right off the top? They're gonna take it bang it. They got they look the Colorado's thing and said listen, we're coming in with steroids

We're coming in with THT Forget what they're doing. Listen, we're coming in with steroids. We're coming in with THT. Forget what they're doing. Listen to what we're doing. Just to set shop now, we don't care if you've been in business or not. Just to set up shop, we got to get a piece of the action. It would be fine if they worked deals out with banks and made it easy and acceptable for these guys. Oh, it's going to be acceptable now. But it's right. In a lot of places, it wasn't, they were dealing in cash.

They hired, especially in Colorado in the early days, they had to hire a lot of like spec ops guy. I love saying spec ops. Like I know what the fuck I'm talking about. Just sounds cool. Um, they, they would hire like former seals and shit and they would have to carry the, the, uh, the money to the bank because everybody knew there was like giant sums of cash. So it made it very dangerous.

They weren't allowing them to use banks or credit cards, rather. They weren't allowing them to sell weed with credit cards. But they were selling weed and credit cards in L.A., medical, in the 90s. The hot store, when you turned me on to my license, the hot store at the time, which they're not there no more, that dude at the height of it was walking out of there every day with 25 grand by himself and his wife.

Wow, that's dangerous. But you know what? He was as dumb as fuck. When the DA came, he had half that cash and a safe right there and there. They just swooped on it. I know a guy who got shot. He was a really nice guy and he used to work at the Engle then and there. They just swooped on it. I know a guy who got shot. He was a really nice guy, and he used to work at the Englewood Wellness Center.

And this was the early days of the medical legalization. It was like, I want to say it's like somewhere around 1999, somewhere in that range, 2000, 1999. And he apparently was coming out with a big bag of cash and someone shot him right in the stomach. Took his money. They didn't take care of themselves. Took all the cash. There was nothing he could do.

You got to hire people. Yeah, you got to hire people. You got to hire people. You know, I see amateur mistakes constantly. Yeah, I saw this, Jamie. I see amateur mistakes constantly. For example, the store I'm talking about, he lost everything, Joe Rogan.

You want me to tell you why he lost everything? Any weed he got, this guy was an exotic guy himself. Like he was a head. When you're a head, you love when somebody brings you. So he bought as much as he could. I love that expression, a head. He was a head. Nobody uses that anymore. They don't use that anymore. So what he would do is when you walked into this place,

he would have 60 weeds on the wall and he kept all his weed on the property. When the feds came, it was like stealing. He had everything there. Everything was there wide in the open. You have to have an apartment, and you have to have an amount. Six ounces is all you should have of one weed. If Jamie comes in and he wants eight ounces, give me ten minutes. I got a pigeon that'll bring it over here in five minutes. Right across the street there. I got a little apartment with some stash there.

You have a couple safes. If the cops ain't going to let you deposit, you've got to be fucking creative. If you read all these guys' stories, the hardest thing. Joe Rogan, you ready for this expression? The hardest thing is what to do with all the cash. Think about that problem, Joe Rogan. It's a real problem. No, no.

Think about this room filled with $100. What was the movie I just watched? Escobar. Oh, no, no, no, no, no. Think about this room filled with $100. What was the movie I just watched? Escobar. Oh, no, no, no, no, no. I was just on a plane. When you're on a plane and Tom Cruise is on, you got to give him the benefit of the doubt. I got an edible in me. I watched the Barry Seal thing.

How was it? It's not an Academy Award winner, but it's very interesting when we're just burying money, Joe Rogan. $4 million a shot. Like me and you are in the yard, just burying money, Joe Rogan. Four million a shot. Like me and you are in the yard. Like, burying money. Like a suitcase with hundred dollar bills falling out of it and you don't give a Frenchman's fuck. I always wanted

to know this. Snopes this. Did Barry Seale die with George Bush's phone number in his pocket? That's what they always said. And he died. They shot him on the way to the trial with George Bush's phone number in his pocket. That's what they always said. And he died. They shot him on the way to the trial with George Bush's phone number in his pocket. Bro, he was top notch, that guy. He had it all. He seen it, bro. He took

pictures of them loading a fucking plane in Nicaragua with Escobar and the top aide in Nicaragua. They had him by the fucking balls. No matter what, that took balls. Fuck yeah, it did.

They fucked him in the ass. They told him that they wouldn't release the pictures. Then they released the pictures, which was douche. And that's why the guy got shot. That's fucked up. They should have taken him and hidden him. He fucking. Interesting, though.

They assassinated that guy. That's a 100% assassination in connection to some sort of illegal government. It was the fucking, what illegal? What are you talking about? That was Escobar that sent the bird a message. They had a deal where Barry Seals could land though, right? Like it wasn't part of the thing was with the people

on the ground. On the ground. That was in Arkansas, right? But here's the problem. This is where Eddie Bravo comes in. Right. They were landing in those Everglades, and don't quote me on this. Right. Eddie broke it down for me, and somebody else broke it down for me, to be honest with you. And they were allowing that on your boy's clock, Clinton's clock. That's the theory.

That's the whole thing. That's what Joey Diaz drops out. Right. I don't know nothing about that. Let me tell you the truth, because the truth is fascinating. The truth is two boys were murdered, and the coroner, the official report they gave to the parents was that they had fallen asleep on the train tracks. So the parents pay for some sort of an autopsy, and it's revealed that the kid had been stabbed and that one of them had been stabbed. And then they find out that around that same area was where those guys would drop their

drugs before they landed. They would parachute down their drugs. They would, they would like, and they would land. And these guys, they would drop points where they would put their shit and then someone else would come by and pick it up on the ground. Yeah, you had coordinates. Right. And these kids apparently saw something they weren't supposed to see, so they fucking murdered

these kids with knives. And then the coroner was all in on it. So they had to conduct some sort of independent. So that is what got this whole Barry Seals thing going. It was this lady trying to figure out, this parent trying to figure out what happened to their kids. It's a fucking crazy story. You have to imagine, okay,

that these guys were getting, you know, let's just draw a number. I mean, I'm just an idiot, but let's just draw a number. They were probably getting $4,000 per kilo. What would they put on those planes? And they were sending five of those planes over a day and dropping them in Louisiana. Listen, I told you a thousand times on the podcast.

In 83, they found a bear dead next to a duffel bag filled with cocaine in Aspen, Colorado in the mountains. Because they were dropping the fucking coke in the mountains. And the bear ate the the mountains and the bear ate the coke and he fucking OD'd his heart blew up oh what does this say okay Barry Seal Seal had organized a sting operation where he managed to get photographs of Pablo Escobar helping Nicaraguan soldiers to load 1200 kilos of cocaine onto a seat 123 military plane soon afterwards Reagan went on television with the photograph to denounce Sandinistas as drug smuggling, corrupting, dot, dot, dot.

That's how much he was getting for that fucking load. $4,800,000 for one load. For one fucking load. Now here's the tricky thing. God damn. Here's what really pisses me the fuck off. That I see narcos and I see everything, but now this is your Uncle Joey talking to you, Joe Rogan. Please show me the good side. That I see narcos and I see everything.

But now this is your Uncle Joey talking to you, Joe Rogan. Please show me the good side of Pablo Escobar. No, no, no. I'm not going to. No, no. There's no good side to Pablo Escobar. This ain't Lee Harvey Weinstein. This is a story that we have never brought up. But you have to assume, okay, you see all these shows and the whole fucking thing.

And they were in bed for sure with nicaragua yeah now who else was in bed with nicaragua let me ask you this do you think that it is the actual cia or is it people or if it when it was let's not even say cia dea fbi made a bunch of fucking letters put them together is it the actual organization, whichever one it is, that's bringing it in? Are they complicit or are they just cowboys? See, the theory's always been that there's been these few cowboys, corrupt guys. Maybe they get too close to drug deals, too close to the drug deal. And then sometimes they get seduced.

Like there's many, many stories of undercover cops getting seduced by the actual lifestyle of being a criminal. Young kids, they probably did a little crime themselves here or there. They see some cops doing some dirty shit. They see them some, you know, there was that thing that came out about, was it Baltimore? What is the city where cops had came out in trial, they had kept toy guns on them to plant at the scene of a crime? Like if they just decided to shoot somebody, they'd plant a fucking toy gun.

We're talking in the big picture. The big world picture, as an intelligent individual as you are, it was plain and simple. The CIA wanted a piece of their action, and the DEA was tricked into going down to really control the war. You can't be this. I'm not saying you. As an American, you can't be this dumb. After all the research that we've done. Right.

All the research that we've done with General Nort. He was in on the package with Barry Seal. The whole fucking thing. And here's where it gets even deeper. Let's talk about the deep subject that nobody ever even looked at. And you have to think of because I heard this story a thousand times. There was a guy by the name of Carlos

Lader that he got crazy. You know, they show him getting his dick sucked on the radio in Columbia and everything and all these TV shows. No. He was on an island snorting coke with long hair, talking like Jim Morrison

and having fucking threesomes and the fucking... Because Fidel would come in and ask you, because they were... He was a serious man. I'd be very nervous in the presence of a guy like that. Leder said in front of

Congress that he was getting 800,000. He was giving Fidel 800,000 a shipload to come in under his flag at the time. Could you imagine being in the presence of Fidel Castro? Just being in his presence. Like if he was, you know, in his prime. If you're in the room with him in his prime, knowing how he ran Cuba. You have no idea. How he took it over.

You have no idea. He would be terrifying to be as a cuban-american you have to hate the guy i have to hate him but as a man that thinks you have to see what his path was crazy again that's where my man tj english comes in with a van and i horn. The revolution, how he started it, in three different places at once. The revolution that just wasn't eight monkeys that put on gorilla suits and went to the mountains of Cuba. He came to Jersey first, got arrested.

Went to Tampa, got arrested. He was already passing out flyers. They always confuse Lee Harvey, I was all no it wasn't Lee Harvey Giving out pamphlets. It was for Del Castro. Give it up. That's a joke. Please don't quote the CIA It's a joke. I'm not writing. Yeah, Fidel Castro was in Union City, New Jersey I can't tell you the dates But I could have my friend call into the podcast and tell you the story about

Fidel talking to his mother on a daily when she would wait to get on the bus she was an irish girl in union city and she goes i knew fidel in 19 52 and union city just think of what he did to the italians he kicked everybody out he's like i got him he goes i got your casino your casino's now. It was a very brilliant move. He started in the mountains. He fucking, you know, he just took over little villages. And then he changed their minds. Because, first of all, it wasn't an easy thing for them to do. Batista was really fucking the country.

He had really divided the country. You have no idea what racism was till you were in Cuba in 1955. Black people weren't allowed in casinos. You have no idea. These poor people today, everybody's crying about. You have no idea what black rights were in Cuba for those black fucking people. They got no rights. So those people were poor. There was such a high level of, you see all these people dancing, but on the other side, there was fucking famine. Like people were fucking dying. So they wanted a change. Fidel came in there as a hero. First of all, he came in as Cuba was going to change, but then he switched it on him and he aligned with Russia and he became a communist.

But then he switched it on him, and he aligned with Russia, and he became a communist. That's what made it worse. That's what made it worse. Racism and hunger has always existed in Cuba. It did. That was the problem, that they always showed that party side of Cuba. But that other side of the island, bro, there was people starving. Wow.

And Batista, come on. Batista. How did they keep up the tobacco production? That I don't know. I don't know. They still, think of that, Joey. Through all that, they had the best cigars in the world. But people are complaining now that they're not the same cigars. Some people are complaining, but a lot of people are getting

frauds, apparently. Apparently when you buy Cuban cigars from untrusty people, you could definitely get some fakes. Because now they're talking about how the soil isn't rich. People will go there. Somebody's an expert. Oh, Bobby Kelly. Bobby Kelly's a real expert. He was on Ari Shaffir's

podcast. They were talking about cigars. Bobby Kelly really knows his shit. He was going in depth about how many fake cigars there are and how he could even kind of taste a fake Cuban he smoked so many cigars and he thought maybe one of Ari's was fake he's like it might be fake and he goes no I think this is real I think this is like it's like he's like that discerning about that shit huh there's a lot of weird freaks when it comes

to cigars like people are super into them they get they get you high as fuck, too. This is something that people aren't talking about. You smoke a cigar, you're like, woo! There's so much nicotine in that thing. And then you add the Cuban coffee to it. Oh, my God. Always. That's how the whole process is supposed to go down, with the Cuban coffee and the fucking cigar. And you go deep, deep, deep.

Yeah. And all you need is a little taste of an edible and a half an alpha brain, and you'll be there. You'll get there, Jack. Dave Chappelle smokes it sometimes with cigarettes in it. We did it the other night in the back of the comedy store with cigarette. Tobacco and a cigar with THC. Woo.

You get elevated. It was interesting. I got one time from San Francisco to Reno. One time from San Francisco to Reno, the cops were looking for me in San Francisco. And you go down to any of those tourist districts, and they have like a bus that'll take you to Reno. So I just jumped on the bus to Reno with this chick. And this is 1985, and we're sitting on the bus and there's this egyptian kid i'll never forget this and the back of the you could smoke on the bus in those days cigarettes so he had rolled

a blunt with hash weed and tobacco in it guys and i had never done that before guys i'm not gonna lie i had never even i took two hits of that fucking thing, dog. I had a puke in that bathroom. I got high as fuck. But that combination together, the tobacco, the weed, the hash, he had the real hash on him. Choo-choo. Yeah, that's too much for Uncle Joey. That's a bit much for Uncle Joey, Jack.

The first time I ever smoked a spliff was with Charlie Murphy. Charlie Murphy rolled them. His cousin Richard rolled them, too. Charlie could roll. He would take Swisher Sweets, old school, you know, any kind of cigar paper, and they would turn it into a joint with the cigar paper, which is like you inhale weed. You never really inhale those cigars. You just kind of get them in your mouth, and you taste it, then you blow it out.

But when you take a drag of weed, you open your lungs up and fill your lungs with the smoke. Cigar smoke is too harsh for that. You don't smoke like that for the most part. Most people don't. But when you do it with pot, you do. So you get this crazy blast of nicotine and a crazy blast of weed. And you're like, wow. It's very different than just weed.

I think I smoked, yeah, last night on the podcast. I took two hits off. A friend of mine gave me one of those. I like those. And it was pretty fucking intense. Scared of them. I'm scared of them. Very nice.

I'm scared of them. I like the ones with cigarettes in them. I'm scared. No, no, no. I don't want no smoking. No, I'm scared I might like the ones with cigarettes in them. I'm scared. No, no, no. I don't want no smoking. No, I'm not smoking cigarettes, but the ones with cigarettes in them, it's an interesting little high. It's like, ooh, this is a new door to the room. It's interesting.

See, that's what, like smoking, one of the hardest things I ever gave up was smoking cigarettes after you smoke a joint. Right. That is just pure brilliance. When you hit a fucking joint and you take a little sip of coffee and after you smoke that two toots, you light up a Marlboro, it's life fucking changing, bro. I know a lot of people love them after a real good meal. Well, it's the whole package.

Is that what it is? Oh, my God. Let me ask you. A meal. A meal. A joint. And then a cigarette. And then another cigarette and a cup of coffee on top of that and some dessert.

Then another cigarette. You have no fucking idea. Cigarettes scare the shit out of me. Oh, please. They scare the shit out of everybody. I can't smoke them. Tony's hooked. My blood pressure will be 2,000 over 80.

Tony says he can quit at any time. No, you cannot. No, you cannot. I don't think so, little fella. And you know what? What was the best? What I realized was two years ago I shot something and I smoked that night. I asked one of the camera guys, let me fucking give me a cigarette.

And that next morning was when I realized how really fucking bad they are You felt terrible. Oh, how many do you have one to two cigarettes two Marlboro lights? And I was fine that night you did one night at a comedy club And I was like what the fuck is going on like every now and then I want to smoke the fuck No, no, I'll never do it again after that night in Chicago. I'll never do it again I took one of Tony's once before his show. It's interesting. Cigarettes are interesting.

It does a weird little thing to your brain. Yes, it does. Yes, it does. One of the reasons why I did it is because I read something about nootropics. Talking about different vitamins, like what's good for brain function. And one of the things they said, that nicotine, nicotine is actually a nootropic. is actually a nootropic and that they found that some people

under the use of tobacco, with the use of tobacco, they achieve like an elevated state of like certain functions of the brain. Like it actually has some sort of

a small measurable effect. So it really does stimulate the way your brain works. See, for me, it's different. I have to, it's the combination. Yeah. That's for me.

Like I don't, I wouldn't just enjoy right now. A cigarette by itself. But the cigarette with the weed. But if that coffee was brewing hot right now, and it was maybe 60 degrees outside with a little bit of wind and sunlight. Well, you know when you stand out in the sun, you're warm. But when you're in the breeze, you're a little cool. Yeah. You go outside, and a good joint of some fucking tremendous reefer with the sun hitting your face, and you take a nice hit of a cigarette, all combined, or even, like, I like what I do.

I'll do a cup of coffee. I'll pop a fucking number and then a little nicotine gum to give you a little guts, some blood pressure medication on top of that. All together, it all works out. You know what I'm saying? If you take them apart, nothing really happens. I get it. But together, that's where you put the befungo in.

Yeah. For me, it's a small shot of Jack Daniels and one to two hits of a joint before a comedy store set. Tremendous. Tremendous. Just a little tap. To tasteendous. Just a little tap. To taste, yeah. Just a little, yikes!

One hit is really preferred. It's a smart move. Two hits is if you're feeling. I did a tequila the other night. Three points, not bad. Oh, with your Weight Watchers. How long you doing the Weight Watchers? How long have you been doing it did I started December 9th. I

Went from 309 to 296 so far excellent, but you know what bro. Here's the stupid thing Joe Rogan Here's the dumbest thing in the world. I got sick and tired of people saying how clean that diet was you don't know dick Until you go to Weight Watchers. Listen, you only take with the new Weight Watchers is? You ready? It's different? It's Mike Dolce. Oh, okay. Chicken breast. Right. Chicken breast. I come to your house tonight and you go,

Joey, what do you want? Give me two chicken breasts. Just the marination. I got to watch how you marinate it. Right. Ougats. Zero points. Zero.

Piece of salmon. Zero. Ougats. Beans. All types. Zero. Corn. Zero. What costs costs money or what costs points beef beef beef does 19 for emporisted pussies over there no no no no no no but if you look at it if you look at it bro check this out you know you do uh jujitsu, 30 minutes, 16 fucking points.

They fit it in. You get extra points. You add points. See, I try thinking about it. I'm going, wait a second, guys. That's smart. Wait a second, guys. I'm doing kettlebells. I'm swinging bats. I'm hitting the bag. I'm walking around the park. I'm still gaining weight. Something's not right. So it's like the butter.

I don't use butter no more. I could eat my piece of wheat toast with my eggs. Oh, you ready for this one? You'd be better off the other way. Ready for this one? You'd be better off throwing away the toast and just eating the butter. I don't like it. I got to have my toast.

Yeah, but eat the butter. Butter's good for you, especially if it's grass-fed butter. Here's the thing. I get egg yolks. Egg yolks are great. Yeah. I eat egg yolks. No egg whites.

I cut around them. You had a bit about that. No, no. There's a thing in the news yesterday where they were saying that people only eating egg whites is a tremendous health disservice. Listen, five years ago,

don't take a fucking moron to tight. Twenty years ago, nobody was getting concussions, nobody was getting soft, nobody was getting their feelings hurt, especially men. All of a sudden, I saw people started eating egg whites, and I saw a big rise in people having a hard time getting their wives pregnant. All of a sudden, I saw commercials about erectile dysfunction.

Men never talked about having. Men talked about, dog, I did some bloating all night, and I didn't get my dick hard. Now, all of a sudden, there's a commercial on national TV, on primetime, some fucking guy saying that. And all of a sudden, they started dropping that low testosterone shit.

And I'm telling you, dog, one thing about Uncle Joey, I've always loved egg yolks. I don't even like mixing them. I think it's bad for... Really? I don't even like scrambled eggs. think it's bad for I don't even like scrambled eggs I'll eat them if you make them if you make them nice to me with a little sour cream

and a little milk and do it I like it but I don't like just prison I gotta see the yolk I gotta rule when you take me for breakfast I always gotta see the yolk so I cut around it the other day the waitress said to me you've been coming here for a long time you do not touch the white and she to me, you've been coming here for a long time.

You do not touch the white. And she goes, I mean, you do not touch it. I have become like a surgeon with that knife. I get the yolk perfectly. I take that wheat toast now. I don't even eat the whole two slices of wheat toast. I only eat a half a wheat toast. I take one egg yolk and put it on one side, and I eat the whole thing like Robert De Niro ate the fucking egg in Angel Heart when he wanted to scare Mickey Rourke.

That's how I do it. I put a piece of bacon in my mouth, and then I take the other piece of wheat toast, put the egg yolk on that. I take the other piece of bacon, and I eat my fruit, and that's fucking it. That's beautiful. I got to other piece of bacon and I eat my fruit and that's fucking it. That's beautiful. I gotta eat the egg yolk though. And you can eat three egg yolks, but you can also scramble four eggs, get a tortilla, put black beans in it

and salsa. All that costs you is the fucking tortilla, dog. Four points for the tortilla. You can have a four fucking point breakfast. I need a bowl of fruit and get brand fucking new, dog. It's amazing. Look at this scene.

That's a great scene. This is a great scene. He's the devil with his creepy fingernails. Remember? De Niro was such a motherfucker. These two guys were such motherfuckers. It's so funny how crazy. I don't believe in that mumbo jumbo.

I mean that that. These guys were the best, man. He just told them, do you believe that the egg is the symbol of the soul in some religions look at you see how scary phenomenal but his face when he's eating that egg show me that again that's a brick but look at mickey rourke's face handsome fella yeah but poor fucking mickey look at his face. Not exaggerated. That's the devil.

That's about as good as a human being is ever going to do an impression of what the devil would look like if he was a human being. Seriously? Yeah, he wouldn't be freaking you out. Who else played the devil? Al Pacino? Yeah, Al Pacino. When he would do those crazy devil rants. Run around.

Remember? It was all that. Every movie had to have a rant. I'm sick and fucking tired! Right? He went through a whole period of time where his rants were so powerful. They're like, ow, ow, ow. Here's where we're going to put the rant. Right here.

His rants were fucking phenomenal. I mean, Al Pacino is Scarface, right? I mean, who has more epic screaming rants in film history than Al Pacino? I'd say zero. I'm going to tell you something else about Al Pacino. Look at him. Nobody's hit a bitch as hard ever on TV than Al Pacino. He smacked his sister in scarface and he smacked that

chicken the godfather when she told him she had an abortion yeah like really yeah he really had a blast dude it looks scary like he looks like he hit her like if it looks like if you're an actress and you never got hit like that before you'd be like oh my god remember steve mcgreen and ali mcgraw yeah that was real that was that was. That wasn't even supposed to be in the scene, right? No, he smacked her just out of principle. Have you ever seen that scene, Jamie? Oh, we showed it before. We showed it before.

You're so repetitive. No, no, no, no, no. That's weed, folks. That's what you get. You get the fun stuff, but you also get shit memory about a thousand million hours. I also heard that fucking De Niro played a good Dracula. Oh, yeah. You saw that movie?

Oh, no. No, Gary Oldman. Gary Oldman. I'm very sorry. No, but didn't De Niro play the Dracula in. Oh, yeah. You saw that movie? Oh, no. No, Gary Oldman. No, no, Gary Oldman. I'm very sorry. No, but didn't De Niro play the Dracula in something? No, he played Frankenstein. De Niro played Frankenstein once. Was he any good? It was a terrible movie.

It was one of those ones where you're like, wait, what? It was weird. Actually, he was pretty good as a monster, though. These are all the actors that played the devil in different movies. What was Kaiser Sosa? He wasn't the devil, right? Yeah. Was he?

Sure. Wow, a lot of people. Jennifer Love Hewitt played the devil? Jesus Christ. John Ritter played the devil? John Ritter did a couple episodes

of News Radio. Look at that dude. At least one. Hold on, hold on. Look at Vincent Price, bro. Vincent Price was fucking just amazing. Hold on, hold on. Look at Vincent Price, bro. Vincent Price was fucking just amazing. He really was, man.

Some of those movies, he did like two movies that really scared the shit out of me. Yeah, what did he do? Which movies did he do? Oh, man. There were two movies. I'm trying to remember. There was a lot of like really fun movies back then

that if you watch today you're like what the fuck he was definitely on batman right what was he on batman um house on haunted hill there's there's his thing house of wax that was a big one house of wax was a big one the last man on earth he was always the it was like thought of as that like real good creepy actor guy who's good in scary movies what's his IMDB I wonder if he was yeah yeah yeah was if he was in that price he was in something funny how a guy gets like synonymous with a genre of movies? Like Vincent Price, you think of, oh, scary movies. There's a few guys like that.

You think of their name, oh, scary movie. John Romero, scary movie. Dawn of the Dead. That's film. No TV on there? That's his name, right? John Romero? No, John Romero did what?

George Romero. John Romero is a guy who was a game developer in the early days of Doom. He was with id Software, like Doom and Quake and those kind of games. Now, George Romero was the guy that, on paper, officially started this whole zombie fucking shit. Pretty much, right? When we were kids, he had Dawn of the Dead and the other one. Dog, he has a scene in one of those. It had to be 1975.

I was maybe 12 years old, maybe 13. One of those came out, and we took a hit of acid, and we all went to the movie theater on a Saturday, take the number one bus to Jersey City, and they would play two of these movies, Dawn of the Dead and something else creepy. Night of the Living Dead. Or something fucking creeped out.

Night of the Living Dead was the first one. And there's one scene where the black guy's going for the helicopter and he just chops his head off. Jesus fucking Christ, did I run out of there. Those both movies were scared the living shit out of me. I don't know how many times I took the number one bus to go to Jersey City, to Journal Square. There was a movie theater, dog. That's where I saw Richard Pryor live at the Sunset Strip the first time on a Friday night.

I got stabbed. Jesus Christ. You got stabbed? I got cut. I still got the scar. That's where I saw. Jesus Christ. You got stabbed? I got cut. I still got the scar. That's where I saw the Pink Panther movies. That was my first genre into getting high and going to the movies. Like I knew I couldn't go to the movies in North Bergen or Jersey City, we could get on the bus, cause a little drama,

get a six-pack, split it four ways, and smoke a joint and go into those movies and giggle and act like an asshole. We also went down to the sea to groove tube and Kentucky Fried Movie. Kentucky Fried Movie was a genre that started before Saturday Night Live. And it was a movie put together by a bunch of sketches. But one of the famous sketches is they're in a courtroom. And there's a gorilla fucking people up. Yeah, they would just say different stupid things.

And the fucking guy gets... Yeah, there was nudity. They had titties. Yeah, they didn't fuck around. You could never do this movie today. This is on YouTube, by the way. This was on HBO when we were kids. Don't be a rat, Jamie.

Oh my God, look at this. Yeah, this was on HBO. So you had to talk your mother into getting HBO because Groove Tube or Kentucky Fried Movie was gonna be on. And they were hilarious. You could never have this movie today. Yes, you could.

I'm getting triggered. Yes, you could. You could do this movie. They don hilarious. You could never have this movie today. Yes, you could. I'm getting triggered. Yes, you could. You could do this movie. They don't have the balls to do this movie today. Girls are getting pied in the ass. Look at this. Look at this. Look at this shit.

This is crazy. You can never do this in a movie today. In a regular movie, they would never allow that. Catholic high school girls in trouble, and the guy's banging a girl in the shower, and you see her tits pressing up against the glass. Legitimately see everything. American Pie was not, I mean, it's not a sketch thing, but it wasn't too far different. No, but even American Pie, I think you'd struggle to do that now.

I think the climate shift is so bad. No, no, no. There's still a part of America that loves this type of humor. Joe Rogan, no. Do you know they took F1 grid girls out of Formula 1 racing? The grid girls? Like hot women? No, no, no.

They took them out, and now they're petitioning to take octagon girls out. And ring card girls. They're saying, like, we need to stop this. They're like, what are you talking about? This is how we make a living, stupid. Like, what? It's the ejectification of women. I think if you can have Chippendales, and you can have, I think you should have ring card boys.

See who gets hired. Joey, what happened? I am just. These people are crazy. People are losing their mind. You made a point the other day with those two young men that, and I don't want to quote you. You said something about that. There's a somebody got mad at people

with the vagina hats. Black women are mad at vagina hats. Transgender supporters were mad because it represents the Women's March and not everyone who's a woman has a vagina. That was their upset. It's transphobic. As much as

an American as you are, I'm fucking done. I'm done. I'm done. I don't know what else to do anymore. I mean, three months ago some guy came out with a brilliant movie Stephen King that scared everybody. Did he not? It was the number one film about a clown.

And all of a sudden there was a parade. They got together. Clown you know they got together clowns marched in protection of clowns because ever since that movie came out a bunch of clowns lost their jobs oh my god in the spring like they were booked for the fall so they blow you know we're getting to something now that's just totally out of control i read the amy schumer thing with Anzi Ansari. I read you know, you try to not avoid everything but it's right in front of you.

Every day there's something else. You're just waiting for the fucking shoe to drop every day. I am going to continue to be who I am, Joe Rogan, on stage and off stage. I don't really give a fuck about sensitivity. I can't. I'm a stand- stage. I don't really give a fuck about Sensitivity can't I'm a stand-up. I can't I don't have time. I feel you I think about it I would I also watched the podcast of you

with Brendan and Brian and you talked about something that didn't happen to no no it did happen to me where I was at a child children school at a fair, and I tried to turn it into a bit. I just couldn't sell it to be funny. A kid was playing in front of me, and I could tell there was something not right with the child, and some other child called him a faggot.

And the kid's mother came out, and she goes, He's not a faggot. He's a transgender. And then the mother came up to me. I'm high as fuck how old were you two weeks this is three months ago okay this is three months ago at a park you know before you go to those events you get tuned up okay and you put visine in your eyes and you go down there you try to be as nice as you can as a parent but you try to avoid talking to a lot of people your wife does all the talking you just sit there and wave the people Hi, how are you? Who do you think's gonna win Machida? Yeah, Machida, and you just you're just watching the girls

You know I'm saying right you try to do that But there's always something at those events that you get back in the car with your wife and go Mrs. Rogan what the fuck was that about then they'll break it down for you. Tell me I'm lying to you Yeah, and every fucking thing Mrs. Rogan, what the fuck was that about? And then they'll break it down for you. Tommy, I'm lying to you. At every fucking thing, it's like you were talking about the people who believe in the earth, that there was no Adam and Eve. That's what I'm starting to, when you were telling that bit, I didn't know what the fuck you were talking about.

I go, who does he hang out with, this poor bastard? Who does he hang out with, this poor bastard? But now that I have a child that's five, I'm getting out to see different people's views that are my age. And this lady came up to me and gave me a whole earbeat how the kid is 15, they have him on medication, and he's known he was a woman since he was nine. But then she fucked up Joe Rogan. She said she always wanted a girl anyway. Oh, Jesus.

But you guys are talking about something about there was somebody that got in trouble for a three-year-old, giving them blockers. I don't know nothing about that world. I know nothing. Owen Benjamin. Got in trouble. Got fired from his agency. They dropped him because he was tweeting a bunch of shit about someone using hormone blockers on a three-year-old.

He's like, this is crazy. What I listened to that day and where I live, I thought my head was going to blow up. And when she came over and explained why he was going to be a trend. And again, I have nothing against transgenders or anything. If a kid is behaving, here's my thing. If a kid's behaving a certain way, let him keep behaving that way. You don't have to fucking throw hormones in the mix.

You don't even know what's going to happen when you do that. You're going to change who he is. So you're telling me that he has this urge to take hormones that are not native in his body in the same amounts. He's just urged to do this, so we should just let him do it. No, he has an urge to be identified as a woman. Like, you don't even have to do anything to do that. If you just decide you identify as a woman, most people are going to be cool with it. We're saying that a child has to

take some chemicals in the middle of their developmental cycle. This is the only way we can do this. This is the smart way? This is the smart way. When they're 6 or 16 or whatever it is. That's crazy. That doesn't make sense from a developmental standpoint. I'm not a scientist, but I understand enough about

the stages that the human being goes through before it reaches adulthood and you're not really completely formed until you're like 20 years old or 25 years old or something like that it's like the frontal cortex doesn't form to your 25 so your decision-making is always a little weird you know what the fuck they want to be a 15 but you definitely don't know it's six or a three no He said she said that he knew it nine come on And I went home and I told my wife my wife said well you gotta watch a show every week on A&E There's a show about kids that wanna you know Make the China listen it doesn't matter

It's just that I'm trying to I'm trying to tell you that I'm finding out about shit now that But you know what's weird. It's like Why why does if someone feels a certain way, they feel they are a certain way. Why do they have to take chemicals to achieve a new state? Like, what is, it's like they identify with being a woman, so they have to take chemicals to reach this state. I think, man, if I was a person who's a transgender person listening to me talk, I'd be like, shut the fuck up. You don't know shit about that.

I bet a lot of you cheered if you're listening to this. But all I'm saying is that this is a very unusual situation. It's very unusual. I don't think it's a bad thing. But I think that doing it to someone who really can't fully make up their mind yet just seems insanely risky. And what could happen to the kid could be terrible. And people have made successful transitions when they transitioned in their 30s. You don't have to do it when you're six.

If you want to be a transgender person in your 30s, sure. Or when you're 20s. Or whenever we decide that a human being is rationally capable of making full life decisions that are as dramatic as that. That's what I thought that day. I was like, who the fuck makes a good decision at 16? Nobody does, man. Or at 21 or 25.

But that doesn't mean that someone at 16 who thinks they're a woman couldn't absolutely become one later and be super happy with it. I'm not saying that's not possible either. Like, everything's possible. There's a thing for everybody. And if that is what you feel like is your thing, you want to be that. It's who you identify with. And you have every right.

You have every right to do that. So what you're saying, bro, you know how many fucking drugs I did between 16 and 20? A lot. It's not funny. You did a lot of drugs from the time I met you. The fact that you were on a heavier schedule before that. No, but I'm talking about, I tried to stay away.

I was a karate guy like you. And the kids from karate, on Saturdays, they were geeks. We either went to a martial art festival, we competed, or we went to a karate movie, or we went to a Honda martial arts supply.

I remember those places. So we saved our money. Like, do you want to go to the movies and see the five deadly hands? No, no. We got to save our money. We're going to Honda next week to buy a Kabuto Tanfa. Like we would always buy the ones that you'd hold with the

Just so you know, I don't fuck around with your money. What are you drawing? What are you drawing? Do you know how to write Chinese letters? Yeah, if you look at those old Chinese things, they all had this on it. That's how you wrote karate. That's how you wrote a karate, like that.

So you would, I knew all about this. You would buy the handle that I would hold. The ones when you were in Taekwondo. And they had the wood at the top. And they had four inches of canvas and you would stand in front of it and you'd be a makiwara. And it would have like your knuckles. These guys would really condition their knuckles.

Oh my God. We would save our money. We were geeks. That's what we did at 12. But they had little goombas in my neighborhood and when they were 12 they did something completely different. They went behind the school and they would roll one joint and

put it in a piece of glass tube and light it up and we would drink Boone's Farm. The fruit shit and I'd get pukey so I didn't know who to hang out with. So I would have to be like a double agent. That was a tough job for me as a 12 year old. I liked hanging out with my

karate geeks. You know what I'm saying? I liked going to competitions, I liked doing forms, I liked doing the semi-contact competitions where you couldn't kick above the head. Yeah, those are good for kids. But you don't like it anyway, but you still kick the kid and get disqualified. But fuck it, I kicked him in the jaw, did you see?

People did that. This is when life was simple for me. So I had to make a decision, because the Kung Fu kids didn't get no pussy. They just weren't into pussy. They would talk about girls and they maybe had a crush on the girl in the 430 class, but they never asked her to come to any of the events. My other buddies were into pussy. So eventually I cut the karate fucking geeks out and I started hanging out with the little

druggies, and you make your transition. And from those developmental ages, like, I tried to hide my drug use. I tried to hide it, especially the marijuana use. For two or three years, it was just marijuana. Wow. Then once I became a freshman,

and I didn't start basketball my freshman year, I decided to, let's venture out into this acid thing. Let's venture out into this mescaline thing. It was a different name. It was mescaline, but it really wasn't mescaline, Joe Rogan. It was a little tablet. No, it wasn't even peyote. It was a little thing.

Aren't they the same? Excuse me? Isn't it a similar even peyote. It was a little thing. Aren't they the same? Excuse me? Isn't it a similar compound? Peyote. Yeah, yeah. But mescaline is what they sell you in the South. Right. They supposedly put it in tequila or something.

That's mescal, right? Yeah. This is something that two little fucking white kids made in a pill. It was rat poison with something else and something else. And it was very tiny. It was maybe a little size of this that's it and it came in aluminum foil even smaller than that wow even smaller than that way smaller that little thing that that's it you paid eighty dollars for it and you got a hundred of

those and you struggled for three dollars a piece and that would fuck you up for six hours with a two-hour haze in between, an hour buffer and an hour to come down. And I did that for three or four months. Then they introduced me to THC Crystal, which is snorting. They sold it as, what we do is we get a bunch of stems and seeds

from the reefer, we put it in a pot pot and we boil that pot. And whatever separates from the stems and the seeds that goes to the sides, we scrape that off. And that's where you snort in your nose. Oh, my God. So I had like a personal karate rule that I would always just smoke it and do the mescaline, but I was never going to put nothing in my nose.

Oh, you had a rule like a drug addict put something in their nose. Right, like that's it. That's a complete different range. I'll never shoot heroin and I'll never put nothing in my nose. Especially as a karate man. As a karate man. I had karate morals. I was just straight away with the reefer.

And then I finally ended up snorting that fucking Gorilla Biscuit shit. Because that's what it was. It was angel dust. They just told you. And I went on an angel dust tear. Like every Sunday me and my friend Carlos Perez would buy a six pack

of Michelob. He only liked Michelob. He asked the good friends, tonight is kind of special to appear with the beer will pour must say something more yeah yeah call it tonight that's low and brow did a little brow what we talking about Michelob Michelob no we were one right we would drink low and brow low and brow that one we would get a six pack of lowow and fucking snort a $10 package of TAT Crystal. My mother would go to the track on Sundays, so I knew she wouldn't come back till seven.

So me and him would snort it. As soon as my mother stepped foot in that car at 11, me and him would have it and we'd snort it and then fucking just sit around like and be fucking zombies all day Yeah, but that was a development and then I went after my mom died I just wanted an acid tear for fucking a year or all different types of God knows What was in those goddamn things god fucking knows what's going on here? The one brow commercial. Oh, this is Look at this commercial.

Oh, my God. Look at that guy. How about a Lowen Brow? Wow! This is like a sketch. It's a truly great American beer. Why doesn't it have an American name, motherfucker? What, are you embarrassed?

Are you embarrassed to be from here? American beer low and proud Fuckin fuck I used to drink low and brows shit actually it is an American beer right? That's like steep Amy Ocha keep your fucking real name. That's as American as it gets It's still around make a little brown. I don't know but if they said Loan breath that was their name and they started the beer company, and they didn't change their name That's as American as it gets so I'm wrong. I should shut the fuck up. It's even looking up. It's a German brewery Liars liars

Liars lying about American American made apparently they make a lot of American American plants make a lot of cars now that you think are Japanese cars Like Toyota Tundras they make them in Texas think are Japanese cars. Like Toyota Tundras, they make them in Texas. They make a bunch of them in Ohio, too. Yeah. Honda's, Nissan's.

That's weird, right? Like, if you think you're buying a Honda, you think you're definitely buying a Japanese car. If you think you're buying some American cars, it might be a Mexican car. How crazy is that? Like, what company's making their cars down in Mexico? I think they closed a couple plants. I think Toyota was down there and somebody else for a while. But here's the thing.

If they put them down in Mexico but they gave them American money, like the levels of American money that's in Mexico, they would stop doing it. It's a lot, actually. Wow, look at all these different ones. Chrysler has three plants. Ford has three plants. GM has four plants.

Mazda has one they do it down there because it's cheaper which i guess they have to do what they got to do and i'm sure it helps the community because i know it does i know people that have had manufacturing down in these countries and they do it for the cheap but it does help the people like there's some places that don't have much but what's arguable is like why is living like a western person so important when these people have been living their own way for thousands of years it just they just didn't have like all the crazy infrastructure and all the shit that we had they didn't have the crazy cities and you know other than a few cities in mexico like mexico city so they would

go and put these plants in like why is it doing i, I don't I'm all for people being able to work. But is that better? Is that better than the way they were living before when they were living like indigenous people or living like villagers or living like trades people or whatever they did to get by? I don't know. Maybe it is better. Maybe it's let's go back to the whole situation here. I still remember because I'm a little older than you, I still remember where it was kind of starting to get taboo if you bought a foreign car. Yeah. Like, I'm that old, ladies and gentlemen. I remember that. I still remember the mid-70s. I still remember when Toyota advertised

or Nissan advertised the car for $19.95. And I would go, wait a second, I got $40 in the bank. I could buy one of those. It was $1,900, stupid, like a Corolla or something. And I still remember there was a time in this country when if you were the first person on this block, if you showed up with a foreign car,

you got a little bit of grief. You got a little bit of grief. You got a little bit of grief. And then it felt like they sold themselves. It felt like we dropped the ball at some point as Americans. I don't know what happened in Detroit and all that stuff. I know that where's the highest population to Puerto Rico in this country? I don't know. You think it's the Bronx, but it's not.

It's a suburb outside of Cleveland. Why? Because in the 50s, they took a bunch of Puerto Ricans and put them into this suburb to work at the car plants. All the car plants shut down there. We ended up going other places and whatever and blah, blah, blah, and blah, blah, blah. And then the farming cars started kicking our fucking ass Why again? I don't know was it the workmanship? Was it the quality all I know is if I got a fucking Toyota I could drive it for 80,000 miles without

Stopping to get gas you know saying right you as a consumer as an American you want to buy American products and you want to buy American-made products. You know, so there's a couple places now, like, beside Mexico, where we have places now, like in Indiana. We have, like, Toyota has a couple places, and they should bring it back. I mean, fuck it. Let some, you know, so we trade.

We get some of Toyota's stuff, which is, what kind of car are they? Are they Japanese or Chinese? They're Japanese. Japanese. Yeah. And let some of our shit get made over there. That's part of, is it NAFTA? That's North American. North American Free Trade Agreement. So I don't know.

That's just, I think, I'm just talking on my ass here, but I think that's just us, Mexico and Canada. So when we build a car in Mexico, it's a lot cheaper to develop that car because of the rate that they pay them. Yeah, they pay people less. They pay people less. It's cheaper to get land.

These people don't have anything else going on down there or not as much going on down there, obviously, as they do in America and some heavily populated cities. And so they can offer people much less money. And there's a lot of plants that do that. That's they can offer people much less money. And they do. There's a lot of plants that do that. That's funny. But here's the thing. Like it's the real question is,

do you think that this is just going to elevate these people and they're eventually going to catch up with the Western world and live the way that we're living right now in the United States? Like there's ultimately a possibility of that. Or are we saying, well, we're always going to have these people that we treat less good and we're just always going to keep them in that position. They're never going to get any better. I mean, which one is it? It's either one of those two things or, I mean, it could possibly be that people just want shit cheaper so bad they don't care. They

don't care. They don't care if a guy's making a dollar a week or whatever the fuck they make. How much do they make? If you had to guess. If you guess, how much does someone in an automobile plant in Mexico make as opposed to an American worker? I'm sure someone must have done some sort of a study. It's weird, man, because if they were doing the exact same thing on this patch of dirt, we would go, what? You can't pay that little. Then you say, oh, but down there, everything's cheaper.

And they're giving these people an opportunity. Why is it better? Here's the question. Why is it better than the way they've always been living? In Mexico, $2 per hour workers make $40,000 SUVs. $2 an hour. Jesus Christ.

Can you imagine a person working all day and you hand them $16? You, sir, are a person working all day and you hand them $16? You, sir, are a piece of shit. Could you imagine? Guy busts his ass on an assembly line all day. You give him $16. Fuck you.

That's crazy. Started at $1.10 an hour. Oh, my God, $1 an hour. You make more in prison. That is ridiculous. And that's Mexican money or that's American money? A dollar a day, two dollars an hour. Maybe it's like the translated.

Joe, we're getting fucked for more labels. That's insane. But it's just, the idea is that if you're always going to be able to, you've got to always be able to make more money. Like these people have this idea in a lot of these corporations of unlimited growth. They just want to constantly be growing, growing, growing. Some people think it's a very dangerous idea. Because your bottom line for your company is to always outdo every quarter. At a certain time, people start getting desperate. And they start cutting environmental corners or cutting research corners or doing

whatever the fuck they have to do to keep their bottom line down and keep their profits coming in and that's what you could say about like these prescription drug companies people want to think that these companies are evil they're companies their job is to make money okay and they're caught up in a storm where they're allowed to make legal money. And this legal money is fucking substantial. It's a giant amount of money these pharmaceutical companies are making on opiates. So people are dying left and right, Joey. Left and right.

This is one of the craziest unspoken epidemics the human race has seen. Joe Rogan, how long I know you. Forever. I'll tell you the truth on everything. I still talk to my drug dealers. They were good to me when I needed them. And from month to month, I still talk to the Armenian.

And I still talk to Don Sleazy. In fact, Don Sleazy just did a big movie. He got a couple lines in a big movie. That's awesome. They do what they do. I do what I do. I have a family. I got a call from the Armenian.

I saw him at Rouse. You have a bit you used to do about the Armenian? That's one of my favorite bits. I saw the Armenian at Rouse. He gave me a hug. I saw him with his kids. The kids are huge now. You don't know how many times I met him with his kids,

and he would put an eight ball in my hand. I've been in that position. So now I had groceries, and I hugged him. And he goes, do you mind if I call you later? You know, and I go, sure, call me, whatever you want. And he goes, where do you live? And I told him, he goes, I live here. Can I meet you?

I want to ask you a question. I didn't know. I thought he was going to ask me if I still did blow. I didn't know. You know, I'm good. I'm good. And when I went to meet him, what he wanted to know was, he goes, you're a comedian, and I just wanted to ask if you knew anybody who could get pills.

And I go, I got Xanax at the house. You're free to take them. He goes, no, no, no, no. I'm talking pain, oxy, whatever. or whatever again i shook his hand i gave him a hug i don't know nobody right right yeah a week later i told him i'd ask because i do know a guy kind of saw the white dude in hollywood right and i called him like a week later the armenian called me and he goes and i go you know i'm sorry on. And I went and I looked and I called this white dude and he called me back. And he said, give me a couple days.

You know, and he called me back. And what he told me was mind-boggling. What did he tell you? The prices. How much he's getting? Of what you pay for pharmaceutical. just getting of what you pay for pharmaceutical he hit me back and he told me three numbers on the phone with three different names of what this guy had and i'm not a drug dealer i called the armenian and i just said listen this is what he told me this is what he wants and the guy goes

okay you don't tell him in a week i get a thousand of them i could not believe the amount of money for these pills really you know i never was a big pill head but oh my god the black market for pills is fucking ginormous and i knew this kid in hollywood would come through i know him 15 years He's a big jujitsu guy. Well, they opened up a door and they can't close it. It is mind boggling what you pay for pills. Well, you know what happened, right? You know where it all started? Well, this is what happened.

First of all, they're obviously very addictive. Second of all, something happened in Florida where they allowed people to get multiple prescriptions. Pain clinics everywhere. It was basically what off-track betting is for gambling. That was heroin sales. It was just heroin sales. Joey, everybody's got an ache. Sometimes my fucking neck bothers me after a couple of podcasts.

I need to get a little Oxy. My back just can't sleep. Here you go. Have some Oxy. They would have a pharmacy attached to a little oxy. My back just, I can't sleep. Here you go. Have some oxy. They would have a pharmacy attached to a doctor's office. Town of 3,200 was flooded with nearly 21 million pain pills as addiction crisis worsened, lawmakers say. Whoa. A town of 3,200 people was flooded with 21 million pain pills.

Town of West Virginia. Jesus Christ. 21 million pain pills. This is the town of West Virginia. Jesus Christ. People in those towns, like from the wild and wonderful wests of West Virginia. What is that? The whites of West Virginia.

Remember that? Wild and wonderful whites. What kind of pills do they eat? Wild and wonderful whites of West Virginia. Oxys, Xanax, whatever the fuck you got. No, I got the little ones. I got the little ones for anxiety. You know when I get anxiety, I get them lately before I get, like if I haven't gone on the road for a while. Oh, really?

That Thursday morning, oh my God, Joe Rogan, as I'm getting ready, I keep thinking like I'm fucking not packing right. Right. I forgot something. I forgot the holes in the sleep apnea. And I've been biting half of it. And you know what? I even fall asleep. I get on the plane, I fall asleep.

But on the road, people give me weird, creepy things. And it's hilarious. So now I just go to WebDemD and you look for pill indicator. And if it's something good, I'll save it. And at least I got it. If I ever have an emergency

or if I'm lonely one night or something, you pop one all these little pills on the you know but when dog when they told me to like I knew when I was a kid I would go to central to Washington Square Park and I could get 8 10 milligram

Valium with the V in the middle that's the real deal when you get a fucking pill and they got a V in the middle cut That's the real deal when you get a fucking pill and they got a V in the middle cut out. That's the shit. That's the shit. Those are the McDaddy's. I could get eight of those for $10

and they were 10 milligrams. Here's the question. Do you think if it was legal, more or less people would have used it or the same? Why are you? What is this, trick points? No, I'm curious.

I'm curious what you think. Gambling, drugs, pills. You give people the green light, dog. We're fucking creatures of habit. We're all going to fucking go. Some of us are going to control it. Listen, there's some people that get knee surgery and neck surgery like yourself. And you've thrown away the Vicodin. And there's other people that get knee surgery and neck surgery like yourself, and you've thrown away the Vicodin.

And there's other people that take that prescription, and two years later, they're shooting heroin. Yeah. I don't understand it. I think people feel pain different. We all have different holes in our genes, bro. Well, there's some people that like pain. I'm not one of them, but there's some people that genuinely like it. They get pleasure out of it.

What kind of pain do you like? I mean, what kind of pain? I don't think this is what I'm saying. No, no, no. This is the question. I think they think there are syndromes where, and it's probably fairly common in terms of not just one person. It's like several people that could point out that, uh, experience actual like pleasure,

like a serotonin burst from certain amounts of pain. They don't feel, I don't think they feel it the way we feel it. And so they're always trying to do things to themselves. And they say that some of the people that get a lot of piercings have that. Some people that get a lot of tattoos have that. They start to want to feel it more. So they want to burn it into themselves. And I'm obviously not a psychologist, but it's apparently a pretty common theory.

Another thing I want to talk to you about, I watched a podcast. I can't believe I have to say I'm not a psychologist. I watched a podcast where you were talking about, because I wanted to really tell you the truth, the podcast where you were talking about that maybe some of John Jones' actions were caused by head injuries. Could easily have been. I'll tell you what. Not caused by, not caused by. Whatever, could easily have been. Could be a factor. I'll tell you what. Not caused by. Not caused by. Could easily have been.

Could be a factor. I got to tell you something, Joe Rogan. Again, let's go back to abuse from gambling or pills. The mind with cocaine is a very tricky mind. Oh, yeah. And it takes a year off. I'm just telling you this from experience because I learned a lot about nootropics from you.

I don't really know much about it. But Romanosky sent me two of his jugs about nootropics from you i don't really know much about it but romanoski sent me two of his jugs it's the shit that neuro one the orange juice yeah that's the shit that got me into nootropics when i got off cocaine that came in the mail and i really drank and i didn't tell nobody my secret because i knew especially for a guy like me you know john j Jones is 26 years old. He's a phenomenal fighter. I didn't think it really had anything to do with anything. I think it was that good. When you're on cocaine in that year afterward,

cocaine takes the pleasure patterns out of your mind, out of your brain, out of that side. The serotonin, the melatonin, I don't know. Don't correct me on this. But I feel that it took me a year to 18 months for me to become a human again. And I haven't gotten hit in the head, not since I was about 13. I got beat up by the guy. I tried the mug, and I got hit in the head with a flashlight. It really took me 18 months to embrace humanity again.

Yeah. I want you to remember that. I want you to think of that morning, what happened in Santa Fe when he ran the light and he ran away from that. Where was he, Jamie? Do you think he just woke up and was going to church? No, he was out from the night before.

Yeah, he could very well have been out from the night before. There's no pleasure. It takes your mind a long time. No, he was out from the night before. Yeah, he could very well have been out from the night before. There's no pleasure. It takes your mind a long time. What's the thing? When I get off the juice, I got to do something for my balls to grow again? You'd have to take something called clomiphene. Okay, and what happens?

There's a couple different ones, apparently. It's an estrogen blocker. It blocks your estrogen. That's actually one of the things that John tested positive for tested positive okay so how long would it take for me to get my balls back again it'd take you a little while they think it's about half the amount of time that you were doing it okay say if you were if that's why you're only supposed to go on like a short cycle unless you're a crazy bodybuilder guy those guys just stay on all the time same thing with the cocaine bro i thought about your statement and i went home and started writing and thinking. I got off in November of 2007.

It took me a year and a half just to become a human being, to realize I was fat. I was 400 pounds. I needed to go to Weight Watchers. It took me 18 months to realize I had to marry my wife. It took me a long time for my brain to think normal like anybody else did. Right. So I want you to take that into consideration. Oh, I definitely do.

I know what you're saying. I agree, too. It took me a long time. You know, when you do blow, when you go on stage, if I do blow three nights in a week and I go on stage, I have no control, Joe Rogan. I'm looking at you in the face. You see me on stage, I have no control, Joe Rogan. I'm looking at you in the face. Do you see me on stage? I have no control. I have no connection from my brain to what's coming out of my mouth. I can't. Now you're going, are you speaking Tourette's? No. It

was empty words. There was no passion behind it. That's why it wasn't funny. You know what you said to me? You said it blocks love. It blocks the love. Yeah. That's it. The love in between the cocaine and my words is gone. Well, that's what stimulants do.

Stimulants ramp up the aggression and the impulsiveness. And they ramp up your fearlessness. They ramp up your courage. You get disproportionate. They ramp up your courage. You get disproportionate. They ramp up your ego. Like some stimulants on some people. Some people, obviously, look, there's people that can handle booze. There's people that can't handle even a little booze.

And I think that's the same with stimulants. I think that's the same with pretty much everything, almost every life experience, in fact. I think there's some people that can handle things and some people that can't. And some people that can't at first and they eventually learn to. Someone sent me something about Rodney Dangerfield. It was fucking great, man. Oh, from the New York Times? The Relentless thing. Yeah, it was great.

Great article. John Dudley sent it to me. Fucking A. It was amazing. Yeah, I read that. Really good. It's amazing. It's amazing. Oh, no.

Tate Fletcher. Tate Fletcher sent it to me. That was great. It was Tate. Shout out to Tate Fletcher. Where is Tate? Oh, no. Tate Fletcher. Tate Fletcher sent it to me. That was great. It was Tate. Shout out to Tate Fletcher. Where is Tate? Oh, damn. Letter of Recommendation, Rodney Dangerfield.

It is an amazing piece. Who wrote this? What is the name of the gentleman? Alex Halbert-Statt. Alex, you made a masterpiece. That's a fucking hell of an article about one of the greatest of all time when it comes to stand-up comedy. that's a fucking hell of an article about.

One of the greatest of all time when it comes to stand-up comedy and he just talks about the evolution of Rodney Dangerfield and how it wasn't until he was in his 50s that he really fucking got it together. It became the great stand-up that we know him as and his process for boiling down his material. Joey, it's a fucking amazing article.

Doug, I read it two times tonight. Look, I get tears in my eyes. Yeah, me too. So what do you want to do? We're going to do this special? Yes? We're going to do a special? Yes, we're going to do a special. I'm going to direct your comedy special. We're just going to figure out when to do it and where to do it. June at the

Ice House. The Ice House is the place. I think that's the place. Four shows. Let's do six shows. Let's do six. Let's do six. I want to do two Thursday, two Friday, two Saturday. Boom! I want to get those crazy weeknight savages. It's a different kind of animal that goes out on Thursday night.

One hour. They're a little more ramped up. We're going for one hour, 15 minutes. You're going to go crazy is what we're going to do. I just want to, we're going to capture the real Joey Diaz experience, and we're going to put together a special. That's it. We're done.

June in Ice House. We'll give everybody the details, but this is the first special that I've ever even attempted to do something with other than my own. Thank you very much for the opportunity. You would be the guy that I would do it with. Let's go fucking crazy. Yeah.

I think this is the time for you. I think the name of it is Immigrant Mentality. Immigrant Mentality's perfect. That's perfect. Out of respect for Stipe Meoci. That's perfect. And myself. That's a perfect name. Immigrant Mentality's the perfect fucking name. That's theipe Meoci. That's perfect. That's a perfect name.

Immigrant Mentality is the perfect fucking name. That's the name of the album. Okay, beautiful. I'm already in process to writing. I'm ready to go. I think the Ice House is the place. We've been there a million times. It's home.

It's family. Oh my God, it's home. Yeah, it's a great place to film. And when that place gets rocking, holy shit. It's perfectly designed. I'm going to Colorado. I'm flying in a day early. I'm interviewing Antonio Lodizio.

I'm going to go show people where I kidnapped Bella. I'm going to show people the halfway house. I'm going to walk around Boulder. I'm going to tape all that. I'm going to have that up this fucking spring. I got some shit I'm playing. I want to do like a little mixtape type of stand-up drop. We got to let these motherfuckers know what Joey Deer is.

Yeah, I'm ready to shoot this special. I had a great time in Charlotte, man. I knew you were in Durham. You and I were discussing the comedy scene in North Carolina. It's amazing. I just want to thank you people. And the week before that, I was in Austin and that place

is like, this last time I got emotional in Austin. Like, I don't know how many times I drove from Houston to Austin to do the open mic on Wednesday, Joe Rogan, in that little stage. I could tell you, looking at your face five times, and now I was headlining and selling the place out. I just didn't walk in there, dog. I did the open mic for Margie, and she would tell me, you're too dirty for me to walk in. You know what I'm saying? And now me and Margie, the Austin is fucking, it's really weird to see the growth of cities,

but not only that, to see the growth of comedy in these cities. Portland, Oregon, like that's what happened, that's how Fidel took over Cuba. Just little growth in these cities. Portland, Oregon, that's what happened. That's how Fidel took over Cuba. Just little growth in different areas. And the internet. The internet has made people more aware of comedy. 15 years ago, we would go to Houston and be excited.

We would go to New York and maybe three other places. Everything else was just a regular town. Now, every town is excited about Joe Rogan, Bert Kreischer, fucking the girl. What's the Chinese girl? Amy Wong. Ali Wong. Ali Wong.

Yeah, there's a lot of great comedy. Bill Burr. Everybody's fucking excited about people coming to town. You know, we've seen this growth. Like, it's been an amazing thing. See, I got into comedy on the tail end. When I got into comedy, people were telling me, it's over, kid, because five years before that,

MCs were getting $1,500 plus air, and features were getting $2,500 plus air, and headliners were getting $5,000 plus air. And all of a sudden, when I got in it, I still remember the first notes he gave us was, before you guys get into comedy, I want you to tell you what happened to the bubble. It busted. And he broke down what comics were getting paid. I didn't give a fuck.

He was just trying to discourage us. Yeah, he's wrong. He's wrong. You know what the bubble is? Not writing jokes. Yeah, that's it. That was the bubble. That was the bubble is? Not writing jokes. Yeah, that's it. That was the bubble. That was the bubble.

That was the bubble. That was the bubble in Boston. I'm almost positive. I don't know. People blame it on the excess of comedy on television at the time. I don't believe that because the great ones are still there. I think what happened was there was a lot of guys that were really, really, really, really fucking funny because they had taken their act and polished that motherfucker like a diamond.

And they brought it to you, and it was just perfect. It was a perfect act, but it didn't change. It was a perfect piece of work, but they didn't write more. Some guys did, but not enough guys did. And so people would keep coming back to the shows. They'd be able to say the jokes word for word, year after year. Like they'd go to see some guys, they would do the same act year after year and they never left'd go to see some guys. They would do the same act year after year. And they never left Boston. And it's a very unfortunate thing because, like, when it comes to, like, proficiency level, there's guys like Steve Sweeney that used to kill in a way that you're like,

oh, my God. What's the guy that used to drink the White Russians in a container? Don motherfucking Gavin. Don Gavin's one of the greatest ever. There were four guys out in Boston when I started that you heard about. Your boy, too, at the time was packing some heat. Lenny was killing it. And what's the guy that had the shows?

He was funny in 91, bro. Anthony Clark. Yeah, 91, 92. Anthony Clark was fucking throwing heat up on that stage. Murder. He used to fill the Faneuil Hall Club with all screaming chicks. I never saw anything like it because he was cute, you know, and he would be silly on stage. Girls loved him.

I mean, to the point where that place would be overrun with girls. It would be like 80-20 girls in this Faneuil Hall comedy connection. We'd be like, what the fuck? Like, what other comic brings in girls like this that love him? And then here's another one. They'd see his same bits over and over and over again. They didn't care. They would fine with it. It's's weird it was a weird time what fucked everybody

up was people would go to see someone special like kinnison did a special and then he tried to do the material from the special on a show and the people already knew the material and they were like yelling out bits and fucking up bits and i think comics then started realizing, once you do a real special and put it on HBO or something like that and it makes you famous, you've got to throw that shit away and write a completely new set. By the time you get out. That's why it's so tough now. Tard.

Because you're trying to develop your hour on the road. Then you put your hour on the road and you go out and follow a week to promote that hour and you've got the same half hour of that hour, and you got half hour of that hour, unless you're fucking Harry Houdini. So now I'm preparing for that already. What I went through after the last time was a big fucking lesson. Everybody has that lesson. Tom is going through that right now.

Tom just put his out. That's it, yeah. And those weeks when you're putting that out, just stay home. Just stay home. Don't embarrass yourself. Don't try to do something. Stay home and get weeks when you're putting that out just stay home. Yeah, just stay home Don't embarrass you don't try to do something stay home and get 15 minute bits of the shot And once you get six of those 15 minute bits, then you go out and put 45 together you start from scratch and then What you still got 30 35 minutes once you shot your bed? You know once you shot that 15 minutes you still got 35 minutes to work on again.

There's no shame. Fucking your boy is an animal. He stays home for a fucking year to work on an hour and then goes out. Russell. Russell Peter? Yeah. He stays home for a long time. Shout out.

He still does some gigs on the road being MCs and just talks to the crowd. Fucks with him. Bro, shout out to our little pet partner Friday Night, selling out the Staples. Only the second comic to do it. Who sold out the Staples? Gabriel. Did he really? Jesus Christ.

Friday Night. That's like 20,000 people. It's a Laker game. That's a Laker game. Gabriel Iglesias sold out a Laker game. Friday Night at the Staples Center. Him and Kevin Hart are the only ones to do it. Fucking animal. How the fuck do you sell out? Gabriel's are the only ones to do it. Fucking animal.

How the fuck do you sell out? Gabriel's murdering it. Here's why. He's funny. Anybody can go see him. You can take your kids to see him, your mom to see him. He's a nice guy.

Everybody loves him. You're getting what you want to see. You're getting a funny comedian having a good time. Tell them about the fucking Staples Center. Sell it out the fucking Staples Center. How many thousands? I want to say that's at least like 18,000 people. I think that might be 20.

It might be 20,000. I think that place is giant. Here's the beautiful thing. I still remember him paying me $35 on a Wednesday night to go do the bicycle club, and he would host. Wow. How many people? 21,000. Jesus Christ.

Christ almighty, Joe Rogan. Oh, my God. That's so many people. My head hurts. He's up there telling jokes. Oh, my God. That's so many people. My head hurts. He's up there telling jokes. 21,000 people. Powerful Gabriel Iglesias. Holy shit.

That's nuts. That is fucking nuts. Yeah, but there's so many. That's the height of comedy. Yeah, he's right at the top right now, him and Kevin Hart, in terms of being able to do that. Especially being able to do that in L.A. He's a hero in L.A. He's done more shows consecutively at the Ice House and sold out

like fucking 10 years ago he was doing that he would do like Monday shows Tuesday shows two shows Wednesday two shows he would just fucking crank them out man he was taking people out to breakfast after his shows on Christmas Eve he still does two

shows on Christmas Eve that's amazing he could do shows at 3 in the afternoon. He would do shows at the Ice House whenever he wanted, and they'd be packed. 3 in the afternoon, fuck it, pack, let's go. People wanted to see it. Have a couple of drinks, watch some funny comedy. Why not?

Thank God. Just the amount of people that are going out to comedy. I'm just honored to be a part of this whole thing. You know, Joey, you and I have known each other for a long time now, and so we've seen like a couple of waves. Oh, my God. No, no, nothing like this. How the fuck were you at the Wiltern sold out in New Year's and Chappelle and John Mayer at the fucking forum? They were sold out, too.

He was sold out, but he did a warm up the night before somewhere else. Like, let's just try it out just to see if it works. And that sold out too. Like, people are out and about, Jack. Yeah. People are out and about. Well, we're very, very lucky to have Dave out there right now. Like, doing a lot of comedy.

Like, he's top of the food chain and he's doing a lot of comedy. Did two specials last year and two specials this year. And they're fucking good, man. They're good. No, no, no. They're very good. That one he did from DC, that is a really good special. That's a really good one.

I enjoyed the shit out of that. I enjoyed the belly room too. Yeah, I love that too. I enjoyed them. I haven't seen that one 100% yet though. How about for years every agent told you the belly room wouldn't work? It's not going to work. You dumb fuck.

They're silly. The belly room, when you get into a groove in the belly room. Okay, let me break something down here. At the comedy store, and again, you're going to go, we heard this. Guys, no, you haven't heard this one. Because I just found this one out fucking three weeks ago when you got sick that night and I covered for you in the belly room. You had the flu and

they called me and I went to the belly flu and I heard to the belly room and I had this certain energy going in the belly room and it just wasn't doing it. The belly room doesn't require the belly room doesn't require the belly room

doesn't require the efficiency that the original room requires. How so? So you want to slow it down a little bit in the belly room? Is that what you're saying? Okay, so I'm sparring with you and we're not doing 50%.

We're doing 30 now. Right. In the belly room if we 50, it's a little too aggressive. The two right there, the energy's right there. I learned this after 20 fucking years of doing spots there. Remember, the belly room was where I learned to story tell. Before that, I was rushing to the punchline and not getting the joke out. The belly room was where I learned to sit back a little bit and explain what the fuck it is you're trying to tell us.

Why you just kept telling me, what are you just saying? There's no segue here. There's nothing, Joey. Right. You're just eating some girl's asshole. It's great. We don't want to hear that. We want to hear how you got there.

I learned that in 99 in the belly room, fucking around. And I went back up there a couple weeks ago. For me, the main room, I got to come out like a fuck. In the main room, I got to come out like Mike Tyson when he beat up, who did he beat up in Atlantic City? Knocked him out in 57 seconds. He was part of one of the brothers with the mouthpiece. Leon Spinks.

Michael Spinks. I eat dick in the main room unless I come out jabbing, crossing. One, two. It's a different room. I got to come out one, two in the main room. Right. In the original room, the gauge is who you're following. I've got to follow Chris D'Elia.

Who came out this year? Who came out against Travis with a flying sidekick? Oh, Fabrizio Verdugo. I've got to come out with a flying sidekick at the original room. This is how people break it down for you. In the original room, you've got to follow Joe Rogan, Chris D'Elia, or Bill Burrow like I had a couple weeks ago. I got to come out from the curtain and throw a flying sidekick upward, which hasn't been done since Bruce Lee and the Chinese Connection. Me and you would usually do a flying sidekick from an evil ground.

No, I got to go upward. That's the comedy in the fucking original room. That's where you see me go bananas. Where you see me at my best, like crazy, red in the face, about to have a heart attack, pitching your heart out on stage.

You have to come out with a flying psychic. That's a crazy move. You're going up vertical or a tremendous up. You're on your back kick and and you've got to get on my shoulders and kick up and try to get in the jaw. That's the original room. The belly room, I could rest on my right hook. I could rest on my one-two.

The belly room you can. I could breathe and just throw one-twos and keep you off me. Deep breathe deep. Get my composure. And even though you hit me with some of those un gallo slugs. Un gallo. Un gallo. If I keep my hands up and stay away from your right, I'll be okay.

That's the belly room. That's why the belly room I always thought would be a great place to shoot a special. You know what's great about the belly room is the same thing that's great about the Ice House annex, the second room? Yes. That's right. There's no room for an act. There's no room for an act. It's too intimate. Like you have to figure out where's the no fat aspect of the bit and you have to be tuned into the

bit. They feel you. I'm doing my 55th birthday up there. Up at the Ice House. What day is that? It's a Saturday. It's the 19th. I can't get the Comedy Store. So I got the original room. I got the small room at the Ice House on the 17th. The 19th.

And then the 18th, I got the original room. I got the belly room at the Comedy Store. And it's the night before George Washington's birthday. So I got people doing that one, too. So I'll turn 55 that weekend. Oh, shit. And working out with Uncle Joey, I only charge $10 or $15. I do that once a month, and I go on the stage two.

And you just fuck around. Everything I write down on a notebook that I don't really know about. And we develop it together up there, and sometimes it's phenomenal. Nine out of ten, it really is phenomenal. It's a good idea. You want me to tell you why? Because I'm at 30%. I purposely eat an edible. Purposely.

I wouldn't do that at the comedy store on a Saturday night. No? No. I purposely eat an edible to take the edge off. Okay. I might even have a shot of alcohol. Whoa. Just one. It's three points. Because I don't need much alcohol. So I'll

do an edible and have a little shot of alcohol at the ice house and tape it. And always get one or two great things, Joe Rogan. I'm not going to tell you I get an hour of greatness, but because you're so relaxed and they know what they're getting.

It's a big difference, Joe. The Comedy Store, listen, how do you sharpen metal? With metal. Comedy Store. Stones. We do a special in June. May, I got to go to the Comedy Store three nights, four nights a week. That's farming.

That's a gym. Who's next? No, no, no, no. D'Elia, get up there. Do takedowns for an hour. Take them down. I don't care how well it's back. That's what you do before you shoot a special.

Don't you think you need all of it, right? You need the sets. You need the writing. You need the sets. You need the writing. You need the working out. Your head's got to be at the right place. Absolutely.

You know what else I think you need? You need friendship. I think that helps. I think that when you said that to me on the phone the other day. And you also know that when I get there, you got to leave some stuff to aggravate me. But I've thought about this many times. Like, who would I be without you guys? Like, who would I be without you?

Who would I be without Eddie? Who would I be without Red Band? Who would I be without Ari? Who would I be without Duncan? Who would I be without Red Band? Who would I be without Ari? Who would I be without Duncan? I think about the same thing. Tom Segura. I think about the same thing. Who would I be?

These people, like Bert, they mean a lot to me. They're very important people. And then there's your family, which is through the moon. That kind of love is very weird. That kind of love is overwhelming how much it changes who you are. The other day you were talking about the tower jikundo the bruce lee book and you were saying that you know a lot of excerpts were stolen and yeah i don't even know if that's true we're not even and that's not the proper word that i used

plagiarized i have a tower joey diaz and half of that tau is what i learned from joe rogan And half of that towel is what I learned from Joe Rogan. The other half of that towel is what I learned from Ari and working with Duncan. None of us are very original. I just kick it up a bit. One thing I love about you is you didn't sell T-shirts after the show. You don't need to do nothing.

When I go into a town, I focus on five shows. I don't want to do your podcast. I don't want to go see the Statue of Liberty. I really don't. You're right. You're there to kick ass. I'm there to go to get a good meal. After the first show, it's a small club. It's sold out.

Let me not go out there and take pictures. Let me focus on the important thing. I'm 55. I got to give you 150 fucking percent. Those are the town. I'm up early. I do my radio. I'm up early to got to give you 150 fucking percent. Right. And those are the towel. You know, I'm up early. I do my radio. I'm up early to get out of there.

Every once in a while on Saturday, you got to have a drink with the audience. Yeah. A little shot on stage or whatever. You know what? I've come to think of myself as what I'm... I'm a piece of three or four of you guys, if you want the truth. Ari, I like Ari's relaxation on stage. Ari takes chances like all three of us love to take chances.

That's why we do what we do. You're not going to get the same hour year after fucking year, not even close. We also have a similar style of mixing everything all up together. Of mixing everything up, yeah. Like Ari does that. Everybody has their own style, man. Yeah. You know, Bruce Lee, he just wanted to teach you how to combine it,

and that's what we're doing right now. For sure. You think I'm Johnny Original? I take a little bit of you. It doesn't mean anything. I learned from Bert. Yeah. I learned from Tom.

I learned from Bill Burr. I learned from Dave. I learned from Tom. I learned from Bill Burr. I learned from Dave Chappelle. And now this is your art. Again, the armbar is the same. Whether I go to you or John, John, you're going to show me the same armbar. It's how I do it. Yep, yep. It's the same point.

It's a really good point. I think there's no way you could ever say any one person is not influenced because every single style of stand-up comedy is in some way or another originated with like the Lenny Bruce's and the Dick Gregory's and the guys who are doing it. Wait, the Dangerfields, guys doing it way back in the day. Even Bob Hope, all those guys, they started this thing. Even Bob Hope, all those guys, they started this thing. You've got to think, the world has had no stand-up comedy up until like what, 150 years ago or something? That's nothing. This shit just started.

And you know who was one of the first guys to do it? Mark motherfucking Twain. Mark motherfucking Twain would do readings of his book, and it was funny, and people would laugh. He was in front of people rocking. He was killing. He was telling stories and reading, and people thought laugh he was in front of people rocking he was killing he's telling stories and reading and people thought he was hilarious he would give speeches and he was hilarious they found somebody before Mark Twain I'm sure but he was a really popular writer three years ago yet days live in proof that that's standard form a form of this art form existed before.

Yeah. In some civilization. I did read that a couple years ago. I'm sure. Storytelling. Yes. There was some story. And because, and now I see myself on stage,

like when I tape my sets now, bro, I hear, I hear a little Joe Rogan. I hear a little Rodney, I hear a little Joe Rogan. I hear a little Rodney. I hear a little Lenny Bruce. I love Lenny Bruce's. Yeah, man. Dig. You know, dig.

I love that Lenny Bruce said shit that you didn't know what the fuck. And it wasn't dirty. No. Just a certain word. Like when I go on stage that, you know, you don't want to know Malukia in the place. Malukia is one of those words. What's he saying? Right, right, right.

Malukia is just bad luck. But that's something Lenny Clark would say to fuck with you. He put the Maluk on me. You know what I'm saying? We were all, we're not plagiarizing or doing anything like that. No, we're influenced. We're influenced. Andizing or doing anything like that. No, we're influenced. We're influenced. And nothing's wrong with that.

One thing that's important is we're all real fans of comedy. I know you're still a fan. You still enjoy watching comedy. I still love it. I go to the fourth wall a lot, Joe Rogan. The fourth wall was what Mickey told Rocky to do. Dog, you know me. I got to take it back to the Rocky movie. Mickey told Rocky to do what? Win, Rocky to do. Dog, you know me. I got to take it back to the Rocky movie.

Mickey told Rocky to do what? Win, Rocky, win! Because he wanted, somebody took, oh, no. I'm sorry. Apollo took Rocky to the dirty gym. Oh, that's right. And said, look at these motherfuckers. Take you back.

No, no, no, no, no. He took him to his own black gym. And he goes, I wanted you to look at these guys so you could look at their eyes. And he goes, remember when your eyes used to be like that rock? Oh, that's right. He goes, remember when your eyes used to be like that rock? So lately I've been going, before I go out in there, I go to the fourth wall in North Hollywood,

and I pay $5 to do five minutes. And the rule is you have to sit there. You know most open mics you do your stage time and you leave? Right. You have to sit there you know most open mics you do your states time and you leave right you have to sit there and watch others well i gotta tell you something the last six weeks i've learned more from watching these open micers than anything because i also realized that where i was when i was one of these guys, I wanted what I had right now. I wanted to be a headliner. I wanted to not be a rich guy, but I wanted to just be funny.

I wanted to be accepted as a comedian. And ever since I've been going to the Fourth Wall, I go there three or four nights a week, Joe Rogan. I pay $5 to do five minutes. I'm no better than anybody else. But the main thing is he asks me when I want to go up, and I always tell him towards the end, because I want to watch these kids. And, Joe, every time I leave that bar, I leave laughing,

and I fucking learn something. Really? And I'm back. No alcohol in there, Joe Rogan. Just fucking eight people watching you do five minutes. I want you to think about when you were doing five minutes and what was going through your heart. I'm just telling you and my heart's beating.

Because I still remember bombing and leaving there thinking, now I'm going to have to get a waiter job or now you're going to have to get a cook job. These guys all have day jobs. They all talk about their shitty jobs. But every time I go to the Fourth Ward, bro, I fucking learn something. I go there some nights. I go to Flapper's.

I go there some nights. I go to the store. I go there some nights. I go to the Ha Ha. I do it that way, but I always go there. And every time I go there, I always go there with, I do it that way. But I always go there, and every time I go there, I always go there with like five minutes planned. Bro, it doesn't even hit the stage.

Because from watching those guys, I learn something, I remember something, and I just come up with this crazy story. So I look at it as like doing kettlebells. Yeah, that's a good way to look at it. I really do. I look at these young guys, and I remember that pain and that confusion that I had. That fucking feeling you had when you were an open mic and your friends were telling you you were funny. But you still had to drive the limo or keep the paper job route or still drop off papers or whatever the fuck job you said you had. You told me the story about meeting at Atlantic's and all that.

of the fuck job you said you had. You told me the story about meeting at Atlantic's and all that. You're still in that crossroads of comedy where you don't know what to do but you know in your fucking heart that you just can't wait to be a headliner. Somebody would just give you a chance.

Back then, I wasn't even thinking I could ever be a headliner. I was just hoping I could make a living. I never thought I'd wind up being successful. And when you mean living, you mean... Food. One bedroom, cable TV. Oh, there was a guy that had a fucking loft.

He was the king. Guy had a loft. They had taken a schoolhouse and turned it into condominiums. This guy, I'll never forget. I looked up to him. I couldn't believe where he was living. DJ Hazard, that's his name.

Hilarious comedian. Oh, my God. Remember DJ? Yeah, sure. Well, DJ has always been a real nice guy. Excellent guy. Very funny. Excellent guy.

Very funny guy. Always has been. But I remember he had like a loft apartment. I remember everybody talked about it. It's like, what? It's got brick walls inside. It's like he was the king. He was living like an adult, but he was, he was a standup comedian. Like

everybody else we had thought about, like, you know, you're living, like you're barely getting by stuffing a bunch of guys into a house. You know, there was a lot of like comedy flop houses or comedians would wind up moving in together or you're living in some shitty apartment that you could barely afford or you live with your girlfriend or something. So it's, it's weird when you go back and think about it, you know? Like, you could have quit at any time. Think about it. Think about your early days when it's terrible and just bombed all the time.

If it wasn't for John Leguizamo. Really? Yeah, I watched him do a set one night at the old Triple N in front of eight or nine people. And in his mind, he was at the Garden Dog. And I was like, I get it now. Bro, where's your Me Too pin? I left it at home.

You know who, one of the most proud moments as a young comedian, when I was at the Comedy Store and I did a set in front of, you know, like literally like maybe five or six people, but I did it as hard as I would do it in a regular room. And I heard in the back Paul Mooney going, laughing in support. You know how Paul Mooney would laugh in support?

And you would go, oh shit, I just got the green light from Paul fucking Mooney. Like Paul Mooney would laugh in support? And you would go, oh shit, I just got the green light from Paul fucking Mooney. Like, Paul Mooney was laughing at my shit. Then he came up to me after the show and he goes, he goes, you're a real comic. He's like, you did that show in front of all those people. And he goes, you knew that there was

five fucking people in that room. You did that show like it was packed. He goes, that's a real comic. He goes, you made me laugh. That's it. That's what you learned at the comic store. But when a guy like Paul Mooney says that's a real comic because you made me laugh that's it that's what you learned at the comedy store but when a guy like Paul Mooney says that to you when you're just coming up

you're like holy shit like I might be able to figure this out I might be able to do this it's big right someone coming up to you you know it's crazy when you do a spot

at the store you know you're in the big leagues bro like no matter where I do a spot when I travel that's one thing when I'm at the store on a Thursday night Tuesday night you know you're in some

fucking good company you're doing something right or you did something right you know it's uh I love when comics are in the room I love laughing at comics I love going to the store a little early and catching two or three great comics and laughing, man.

That makes my fucking night. Whether it's you or even Bobby Lee is so fucking out of his mind on stage. You know, lately we've been getting the Ron Whites and the fucking Bill Burr. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, Ron White, Bill Burr, Ali Wong. There was a lineup last week. Chappelle's there, Ali Wong. There was a lineup last week. Chappelle's there all the time.

There was a lineup last week that was just ridiculous. It's insane. Two weeks ago. The night I saw you down there, that was just ridiculous. Places on fire. I was down. On the way down, I had anxiety. You know, I puked on the car one time on the way down there from the anxiety of going down there and following.

Well, I'm having the surgery at March 5th. For your ear? Yeah. And what do they have to do exactly? Put a tube in there and following. Well, I'm having the surgery at March 5th. For your ear? Yeah. And what do they have to do exactly? Put a tube in there to drain the fluid. What fluid's in your ear? Whatever. It's getting to the point where, listen, bro, for the last six months,

I've been living with plugs when I go to the shower. Now I got to wear earplugs when I go to jiu-jitsu. Why? What's going on with your ears? Because the fluid goes in. I don't know, dog. I stuck a bean in my ear when I was six. I was playing that game,

please don't spill the beans. Then you stuck one in your ear and fucked it up. And I couldn't get it out. I just left it there. Oh, it probably rotted over. It went in there and fucked it up. My mother put hot oil in there. They took it out with a fucking...

Oh, no. Oh, they wrecked your ear. So they wrecked my ear. So today, I get car sick. A doctor didn't take it out? Yeah. I went up to the Jewish hospital on the 60th and Broadway up there. That's hurting my ear just thinking about it.

So now, 50 years later, because of my driving or whatever, now I get car sick. Oh, like equilibrium. So I have to even wear earplugs when I go on walks and it's hot. I got to wear earplugs because if not, the sweat goes in my ear. You know what? I used to get terrible fucking car sickness from trying to read a book in a car. Oh, yeah. You cannot do anything like that in a car.

After a while, you're just like. Oh, especially with reading glasses at this car. Oh, yeah. You cannot do anything like that in a car. After a while, you're just like. Oh, especially with reading glasses at this age. Oh, really? Put reading glasses on and try to read your Twitter, Jack. And come around that turn where the 405 hits the 101 and see what happens to your fucking stomach. It's a weird thing, huh? Motion sickness?

Some people get it all the time. I get it all the time i get it all the time not on planes not i get it if i get high and get on a boat go down to jersey shore get on a boat i'm done i gotta take the pills oh that those pills drama mean that stuff is brutal that stuff is i would rather be seasick than be that tired i'd rather be sick i'll throw up i don't give a fuck that it sucks but at least i don't feel like I'm drugged out. I fell asleep in a diner. Me and my friend Jimmy Gittilio, we went

bluefish fishing on one of those party boats. On the way home, we stopped at a diner to get something to eat. I literally fell asleep, head down on the table. I literally was drugged out. Were you on the Dramamine? Yeah, I was on Dramamine. And I was only like

150 pounds back then 154 pounds that was like what what i was weighing when i was competing and uh i never did anything i didn't do anything i didn't drink i didn't smoke pot and then i didn't do so when that drama beat in my system my sister was like check please it just shut down i I couldn't hear. I had no tolerance at all. I fell completely asleep at a diner. But I tried to take with my friend Jimmy Took. He's way bigger than me. I think I just overdosed.

Let me ask you something. When Harvey Weinstein gets out of rehab and he wants to come on the podcast, would you let him on? I'd let him on if you're coming on, too. Why? Because we're going to have some fun with him. Oh, yeah's hot box him we want that we want the fucking real footage he's got some crazy you can't you can't you can't have him anywhere you know that guy especially in the middle we're joking around folks especially in the middle of a trial because he's in the middle of like a ton of trials when he comes back he's gonna get charged oh for sure something's gonna happen

there's so many different trials in terms of like civil lawsuits and stuff. There's a lot of women saying he did horrible things. It's undoubtedly, there's no way he's going to escape. Something's going to happen. Something. Civic trial, criminal trial, some kind of trial. Yeah, he's going to have civil trials. Absolutely.

We're changing as a species. That's what's happening. And in the way, it's like we're making it up as we go along. There's a lot of rocky things that are happening, a lot of chaos. But there's an awareness of, like, what you should and shouldn't do to human beings in terms of, like, forcing yourself on people and, you know, fucking them when they say no. It's like rape. And the idea that we're still doing that in 2018 and people are doing that at a really high level. It's like, boy.

But I had creepy things when I moved to this fucking town. Of course. Right off the bat. As soon as I got here, I heard the creepiest fucking things. Yeah. And the more you got into like the movies, like I heard even creepier things and i saw creepy behavior and listen man you never want to call a spade a spade because you get in trouble but you look at kevin what's his name spark wasn't that which guy kevin spacey kevin spacey you can't tell he sucks dick

part-time you never knew he would suck a dick part-time if you looked at kevin spacey if you look at that dude lee harvey weinstein you can't tell that that dude would make you suck a dick part time if you looked at Kevin Spacey if you look at that fucking dude Lee Harvey Weinstein you can't tell that that dude would make you suck his dick before think about that and all these people took pictures with him what happened to the fucking agents that actually sent you on that mission to Lee Harvey's

fucking hotel room I want to know where the fuck they are they didn't know that Lee Harvey was going to come out with a massage and ask you to suck his fucking dick or watch him naked. Bro, we knew for a long fucking time. Everybody knew. When there's a fucking gap, when you have a dream and you have power, a lot of things can happen.

I mean, I'm no fucking Liberace, but I got my dick sucked at the comedy store just because of being a comedian and somebody thought that you had supernatural powers. It's fucking crazy. And if you don't know about fucking Hollywood, listen, man, they've been fucking people till they're dead for years.

Look at this fucking Marilyn Monroe. They killed that bitch and you don't know who else was a dirty motherfucker that fucking Liberace Yeah, that guy was making you sign contracts making you fucking have plastic surgery making you have plastic Are you fucking kidding me? There's been some creepy fucking shit in this town that people got away with for fucking zillions of years And now and I'll tell you what man.'m all for the movement I'm all for it

I have a daughter you have daughters I have sisters I got friends I'll tell you what fucking bothers me the most I'll tell you the only thing that bothers me out of this

you know what bro who was in Papillon with Steve McQueen I don't remember Dustin Hoffman was he? if he finger banged you in 73 shut the fuck up

alright shut the fuck up people change I'm not the same guy who kidnapped Kent Bell in 1987 I'm not sorry Joe

I'm not so how you gonna come back at me about something I did in 1987 I was a different guy I was doing blow I'd ask you to finger bang you. You can't do that.

That I don't want to do. Don't end somebody's fucking career because he stuck a finger in your ass in 92 and now it came back to you through the skill of amnesia. You can't do that to me. You want to call me out personally? Call me the fuck out. Call me at home and go, hey man, in 94 when you asked me if you could eat my asshole, you were wrong. Listen, I was doing an eight

ball a day. What do you want from me, all right? I resolved that issue. That I understand. But don't call me out on something I did in 1972. People fucking change, bro. That's what pissed me off. There's some giant gaps we're talking about. For Jeremy Piven, it was

1985. And don't fucking call me out. Before you call me out, call me out with a friend. But you're talking about at what level, though? If it gets to rape, and you've been holding it in this whole time. Listen, where I come from, that's not even allowed. That word never entered my mind, ever. I'm talking about if I was coked out of the bar one night, and I went up to you and I told you your titties were banging. Right.

And I want to put a coke rock in your asshole. Right. You can't come at me for something in 1988 because I used to do it every other night. That was my opening line. Listen, your asshole's on fire. What's it going to take for me to stick my tongue in that fucking thing and make that thing jigger? You know, you're not going to, You're not gonna get a piece of ass by selling somebody real estate. You gotta

sell them dick. Well, the ones that it works on, that's the ones you want. Like, if you can go up to a gal and say that to her. Yeah, when I was doing coke, you gotta write me off. If I knew you were a girl, and I knew you did coke, and you had that certain look in your eye. What's the

coke look? The coke look that is... When you do cocaine, you do dirty fucking things. So when you look at a girl that's doing cocaine, and she's like, if she suggests to you that she's going back to your hotel with you, it's on. Nobody goes back to their hotel with you when they have a boyfriend if you're doing coke. It's on. The percentages keep

getting go higher and higher. Well, coke apparently makes people promiscuous, right? Right. Makes people go fucking bananas. They're going to suck your dick. You take somebody's wife up to your hotel room and it's 6 a.m. and she's doing coke with you you'll notice that one of the times she comes out of the bathroom the button will be opened you know

what i'm saying then the next time she comes out she'll come out to tell you a story and her pants will come out and she'll butt them in front of you little things start to happen to give you signs and pretty soon you're like listen nothing nothing take for nothing. Take off your pants. Let me see you play with your pussy a little bit. That's what gets me right now is the 20-year call-out, the 30-year call-out. Man, you're going to ruin Dustin Auburn's career. He was giving out foot rubs. He was asking, acting creepy.

But you know what, bro? Part of that shit, we allow that creepiness in society. We turn our fucking heads. You follow what I'm saying to you? I'm sure you're not the type to ever turn your head. I'm not the type to turn my head,

but I notice it. I notice it. The cocaine thing is a real interesting one because you see people making crazy decisions. Just real nutty fucking decisions bro you're selling toning men of tone and you're messing with your whole system so your whole system's delusional i remember going out like after a long night and not sleeping okay now there comes to a point where you have this paranoia where you don't leave the house

but now there comes to a paranoia that you're gonna leave the house. But now there comes to a paranoia that you're going to leave the house and bump into somebody. And guess what? Sometimes you actually do. You go to a 7-Eleven to get a soda, and you bump into somebody who's in the same predicament as you. That happened to me once. I went by Gavin's.

I think I was staying with Ralphie, and I went by Gavin's. And on the first floor, there was this chick that used to be a stripper, and she had a daughter that was about 13, kind of ugly. She looked like Pavarotti. We used to call her Pavarotti because she had thick fucking eyebrows and shit. But her mother was kind of a freak, and I got up like I was up all night. It was like 9 in the morning, and I was about to call my drug dealer to get a package at 11 to keep the party alive,

and I bumped into that animal in the stairway. And she asked me, like, do you know where I can get some coke right now? I was on my way. And that chick was engaged. I'll never forget that she was engaged. And I go, I'm on my way right now. And she goes, do you want to split a gram? I go, yeah, yeah, let's split a gram.

It was like 30 bucks. We went over there. We split the fucking gram. We went back. Her daughter was sleeping. So we had to do the coke in the hallway on the first floor. All right, under the stairway. You know what I'm saying?

Right. And after we did two blanks, we were just thinking. They were looking at each other. And she was like, don't even ask. I just told the guy that was bothering me all night that I wouldn't give him sex. I was like, listen, it's 10 in the morning. You got to do something here. We got to do something.

And I started swapping spit. Well, the next thing you know, she's sucking the helmet. And when I went to cum, she goes, don't do that. And I came on her jeans. Like it was all over her jeans. It's 1130 in the morning. You come on some of these jeans, you're coked up. I felt like a piece of shit.

That's not the worst of it. I see her three nights later at El Compadre. And she's with her boyfriend. I'm like, oh, no. And her boyfriend comes over to me. He goes, hey, man, we might have a problem here. And I'm like, what's going on? He goes, my girl's a little bit angry at you.

I don't know what happened, but I think you should apologize. I felt like going, I came on her pants after she sucked my dick. That's what happened. Did she tell you that? Like, that's how crazy the coke world is. Oh, my God. Like, she told her boyfriend she was angry at me. It's none of your business why.

So he came over to me. He goes, I don't know what's going on. You're a nice guy. I don't know what's going on. I feel like going, you know why? She blew me 11 in the morning. Then I came on her jeans. I shot a load on her jeans.

She couldn't fucking. You know what? What do you spray on your jeans to get shit off? I shot a load on the jeans. She couldn't fucking, you know what? What do you spray on your jeans to get shit off? I'm going to shout it out. She couldn't shout out that sperm if she fucking wanted to. That old coke sperm. No vitamins in my system.

I weighed 380 pounds. Those jeans were stained for life, dog. Those jeans were stained for life, Doug. I did the dumbest shit on all those drugs. The dumbest shit. And especially the year it took me to get off it. What's going on?

Someone at our door. Oh, okay. Who the fuck is this? Paging me at 546 in the morning. Crack a donning. What's going on? Is it FedEx? Probably.

Someone dropping something off. Anyway. What's up, my brother? Nothing. We got to get out of here. Eventually. All right. I'm going to leave eventually. I'm good.

I'm having a good time. It was good to see you. It was good to see you, too, man. Jamie, my man, I thought about you when I saw fucking the Crimson Tide come back against them. I thought about you. Who'd you bet? That one, yeah. I lost on that one.

Tell me the truth. I tried parlaying some stuff on that one. Oh, you fuck. I don't go straight up. You love those sucker bets. For sure. You got to go straight up. It's winning the lottery.

Why win 20 bucks when you can win 200? No, because I'd rather raise my percentage and bet one and double up on it and just worry about one. Why am I sweating two moves? Who the fuck am I to sweat two moves? I don't want to get in that long game. Oh, my God. Fall too deep like you were talking about the whole show. Who the fuck is this?

What's the next fight on the card? It's too exciting. We got some great cards to go over. The Rockhold Romero fight. That's a great one. Rockhold Romero, and then you got March 7th, Khabib against Tony Ferguson. Holy shit. In Brooklyn.

Coming at you from all directions. That's going to be a pain. In Brooklyn, New York. Are you doing a show that weekend in Brooklyn? Isn't it April? It's April, right? April. What's the exact date?

April 7th, I believe. Yeah. I think it's April. Fuck. Yeah, that's a crazy fight. That is a horrible time I'm having surgery. That's a Rockham Sockham Robots fight. Yeah, that's a crazy fight. That is a horrible time I'm having surgery. That's a rock-em-sock-em robots fight. Yeah, 223.

That's a who-the-fuck-knows fight. You know? That's one of those fights where you're like, ooh, that's going to be a crazy one. Tony Ferguson's a bad motherfucker, and Khabib Nurmagomedov is already one of the scariest guys I've ever seen compete. Ever.

Malls people. Already. This is his first shot at the title. Just stop and think what happens if that fucking savage gets the title. That guy smashes people. What he did to Edson Barbosa was supernatural. It's like he's not even the same thing. You said something during that fight that said it all.

There was one point in the fight that you said, look at the look. In Edson's face. Edson's face. Yeah. And I've had that look, and that's when you're getting chased by 18 people. He had a look that he didn't know what to do. He had no hope.

He went into a survival situation. Like when you see a deer that's getting attacked by a crocodile or something, they have this survival thing where you're just trying to survive. Obviously, a deer is not the same. That's a terrible analogy. Hold on, let me correct this. What I think is that Barboza had realized that there's no way he's going to beat this guy on the ground.

It's not even close. I think if he went into that fight, he probably thought he'd be able to stuff more takedowns and probably be able to get back off his feet because he was doing that with a lot of guys in camp. But once that guy gets a hold of you, there's an acceptance that certain fighters go through where they're locked

down like, holy shit. They're just drained from this animal mauling them. Trying to retain their energy. Trying to recharge their battery. Trying to get back in it. And you gotta realize, that guy, Edson Barbosa, is one of the best fucking kickers ever. Ever. He's one of the best kickers ever.

That fucking guy is the fastest switch kick I've ever seen in my life. Outside of, like, professional Muay Thai, like, San Chai or Buu Kao or something like that, he's got a world-class left leg kick. I mean, whoo! He's fast as fuck. He couldn't keep that guy off him. That's how scary that guy is.

There was a look on his face to me where he drilled for hours. He drilled takedown defense. He drilled everything there was, but he never drilled this. He couldn't do it. There was one point where he looked and he was like, wait a second.

I've done everything I can. I even trained with the Giants, taking me down for a week. Different animal. I never felt this. Different animal. I don't know how he keeps you down either. His control on that side is fucking something that is...

There's certain guys that have a grappling skill that it's very hard to see when you look at it. Even if you're a skillful grappler yourself, you're looking at someone, you're like, why is he able to do that to everybody? What is he doing differently? Why is this one guy being able to do certain things that other people can't do?

And there's a few of those guys out there. When you watch them, you just go, Jesus. Like, what the fuck? But Khabib's the number one guy in that category because he's never been defeated. He's had one moment of adversity in the octagon. He got clipped by a punch from Michael Johnson. I can't think of a single round he's lost. Not off the top of my head at least.

I mean, he may have lost rounds on some judges' scorecards, but he's essentially mauled every motherfucker they put in front of him. He's an animal. So this guy versus Tony, it's a phenomenal fight because Tony is a savage, and Tony fights very well off of his back. He is a seriously dangerous guard. You can't sleep on him. He's durable as fuck.

He can knock you out. He never gets tired, and he's as game as they come. And he's a fucking champ right now. He's the interim champ. You know, when he beat Kevin Lee with a triangle, You beat a top guy like Kevin Lee with a fucking triangle. That's a big move Tony's dangerous nasty darts chokes his darts choke is one of the best I believe is great, but he wasn't ready for Tony bro Kevin Lee is sick to staff

Unquestionably yeah him. He wasn't. Tony is too high level. That was too... You could see in the second round. Perhaps. I would like to see that fight again. You have to say that because that's how it went down. That's how I saw it, yeah. But I think that if you wanted to have them fight again,

and Kevin Lee can go into that fight healthy, I think you'd see a very different fight. I don't think you would see Tony... I'm not saying that you would see Tony lose or Kevin win, but I would think you would see a Kevin Lee that could sustain his performance longer. I think being drained from staff is just, there's no

if and I've had it before, it's the worst. Your body, it's not the worst, but it's not good. Your body goes into a very weakened state. You are not the same thing. You're just not. If you're a real professional, you can go out there and do your job, and a lot of guys have. A lot of guys have fought and won. Luke Rockhold beat Chris

Weidman on antibiotics. How about that? He was fighting off staff when he beat Chris fucking Weidman. That's how good Luke Rockhold is. Guys have done it, but that's not him at 100%. He won at 70 or 80 or whatever the fuck it was. There's no doubt about it.

Staph infections and antibiotics both fuck you up. And Kevin Lee, I believe, opted to not take the antibiotics until after the fight. So he didn't want to weaken his system. But he's still weakened by the staph. Fuck. Fuck all that shit. Demetrius Johnson versus TJ Dillashaw. Super fight targeted for UFC 226 and co-main event.

Oh, shit. Where's 226 at? I don't know. July, Vegas. Oh, shit. With the Stipe DC fight. Oh, shit. That's a big card.

Let me tell you something, bro. They got some good cards coming up. McGregor's kept sleeping. Don't sleep, motherfucker. This game might run right by you, shit. These motherfucking fights are getting better and better now again. I would love to see Steve Baby become a superstar. Me too.

I think he deserves it. And I think you look at where that guy is right now. What is more American than this guy? Like you said, with his immigrant name, what is more American than a guy who works right now as a fireman while he's the UFC heavyweight champion of the world? He's a good dude, bro. He's a great dude. He's a good dude.

And broke the record. He's a very good dude. Broke the record for the most defenses. Yeah, he's a very good dude. And beat the scariest contender we've seen in a decade. You know, again, I watch the podcast a lot, and you had those guys on. You were talking about the Tower of Jeet Kune Do. And I think that a lot of people really miss out on the main thing.

And this is what you miss out with me and everybody. I miss out with you? No, no, no. I don't. You mean other people, you mean? Yeah. Like whenever I watch these Bruce Lee fucking things and I see these kids of the 30 talking about Bruce Lee, I get sick to my stomach because Bruce lee didn't bring martial arts to this

country and he gave immigrants hope bro i was a kid i'd just come from cuba the green hornet on sunday nights i would throw you out the window to watch that show when i was five and then they canceled them and then he came back with the first one that's supposed to be Fist of Fury, but some argue that was a flat. That didn't do that good. That introduced him. It was the one in 71, The Chinese Connection,

when I was eight. That was a great movie. That really put this country over. If you were, it didn't mean you were a tough guy. How many, on YouTube, how many black guys are there that think they're Chinese and they got wisdom? What was the guy who used to send you videos of? Yeah, I forget the guy's name, but there's a bunch of those guys.

Bruce didn't make people tougher. He gave immigrants, blacks blacks he gave them hope how many black dudes started dressing like bruce lee and you know doing crazy shit and wearing kung fu outfits kung fu outfits you know everybody's wrong about bruce lee because i saw it and i saw his death and i saw how people would go to chinatown because there was no internet fighters still today when they go to seattle they go to his, they go to his grave. I went to his grave. I went to his grave, took a picture, and gave it to Eddie Griffin.

That's why Eddie Griffin will always be indebted to me because I gave him a picture of Bruce Lee's grave. That's hilarious. Bruce Lee, when he died, there was no internet. They didn't report Bruce Lee's death on the news. How did people find out about it? You found out a week later when the Chinese newspaper hit New York. And then in Chinatown, it came out through Chinatown. When I heard about it, I was forced to go to Chinatown and get the paperwork with the pictures. It was an open casket in China.

And the open casket was glass around him and him nobody believed Bruce Lee was dead then after the dragon came out everybody made a million dollars and nobody said nothing but his death fucked people up like you know

Bruce Lee gave hope because the Vietnam war was going on and there was something else going on in this country That people don't remember that destroyed this country. You know what shot this country down what when the Beatles broke up? Jesus fucking Christ did people lose their mind so you always get into arguments with people Let's up one's a good band. Yeah, but wait till the Beatles get back together bitch because they were always threatening you with the Beatles dog I like Jethro Tull. Yeah, but they're not nothing compared to the Beatles So until John Lennon got shot then those people had a voice fuck you and the Beatles bitch You know, you're a springsteen is the man. You know what you would love what go to the Mirage show the Beatles Cirque du Soleil

show. It's called Love. It's fucking incredible. When did you go? Incredible. A couple weeks ago. You were there doing stand-up? I was there with my family. Okay. And I wanted to see the Cirque du Soleil show. It's supposed to be amazing. Right. I see the original Cirque du Soleil. Well, there's a gang of them now. Nobody remembers,

bro. When the Beatles broke up, this country went to a tough time. You have no fucking idea. No, you don't have any idea if you're young. You have no fucking idea. It's hard to really put it in perspective. When the Beatles let it be out and they ended it with Let It Be, dog, that was it.

People were cracked. White people were cracked, Jack. Fucking incredible song. When you think about when John died, when John Lennon died, what happened in New York that Sunday you think about that? That was amazing to look at now. He was on another level the whole band was on another level. They were very psychedelic Bruce Lee came in at the perfect The Beatles were breaking up Muhammad Ali Ali. Muhammad Ali. But also in 1973, this is a very interesting fact. At $15 ticket sales, at $15, $12, $10 ticket sales, this country grossed $3 billion in concerts.

Really? Go watch the 70s on CNN, the one one about music i can't say i'm surprised so much good music came out of that time that era everybody was on tour they had a list of who was on tour wow zeppelin the stones uh the who when i was in high school we always went to concerts you always when i was in concerts we were high school we went to the jay giles band yes we wouldn't see the who i saw johnny winter i saw jethro tull i saw george thoroughgood and the destroyers he did a 50 50 tour in 1981 that dude he did 50 states in 50 days that was the big thing to do uh george thoroughgood and the destroyers dude people forgot about jay giles band jay giggles band that was people forgot about Jay Giles' band. Jay Giggles' band.

People forgot about Freeze Frame, Angel is a Centerfold. He was married to Faye Dunaway, that singer. Whatever his fucking name. Peter Wolfe. Peter Wolfe was tremendous. He was a bad motherfucker. All right, Joey, I got to wrap this bitch up. I got shit to do.

I love you, motherfucker. Thank you for doing it. So we're going to do this in June. June. Let's do it. We're planning on it right now, folks. We'll keep you guys updated, but I'm going to direct and put together Joey Diaz's comedy special. We're going to let motherfuckers know.

Immigrant Mentality, coming soon. See you, bye. Immigrant Mentality. Bye, everybody. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you, brother. You talked to Shonda already?

Yeah.