The Joe Rogan Experience - #1092 - Mary Lynn Rajskub

Episode Date: March 14, 2018

Mary Lynn Rajskub is a stand up comedian and actress.

Anything. Anything. Life. Four, three, two, one. Live. And we're here with the Arnold Schwarzenegger of comedy. Marilyn Rice Cobb. How many people have ever, on one shot, spelled your name right?

Or pronounced it right? Never. It's kind of exciting now that you mention it. Because they're going to introduce me and it's just... It just gives an instant obstacle. Like when you were coming up as a comic, there had to be a big issue. Like for the emcee to bring you up, or the DJ, when they bring you up, if you were the emcee? The DJ or the emcee.

I don't know. I never really looked at it that way. Well, somebody had to introduce you. Yeah. Right? Someone was introducing me. looked at it that way well somebody had to introduce you yeah right like someone was introducing me i think i was in such a a bubble i didn't really and i wasn't on the road hardcore and i wasn't i don't know i wasn't identifying with uh me as a performer so much what does that

mean that means i was doing performance art and people were laughing. I didn't know why they were laughing. Right? I moved to L.A. and I was like, yeah, let's do shows. Like, I didn't know. I didn't think about it as like, you're introducing me. I'm a performer. I would say only in the past couple of years have I done the road proper.

But I came in the back alley for everything for comedy for for acting like if I had come to LA with a stack of headshots like hey I'm ready for acting it would have never happened I just came with a group of people like I want to do some live shows I'm like no business being in LA no business just doing weird weird shows because that's what I was compelled to do. I could not have done it had I said, all right, you're going to do acting and performing, especially not comedy.

I didn't identify with that at all. I had to figure out why people were laughing. That's fascinating. So when you first got into show business, what was the goal? It's a weird word, show business. Isn't she a special lady?

I'm audition ready today, by the way. You notice I have a good brow and a good eye shadow line. I'm such a woman. I'm really more of a woman now than I've ever been. What's that about? What's that about what's that about yeah just growing up letting it go i look back on my 20s and i'm like you were a hot like what was wrong with you but i was so incapable of anything like so socially i mean i still am but i'm much much better now but it's Awkward, you're saying? Yeah, awkward and just, but that's.

I don't find you awkward. Thank you. So I think it's odd. Like every time I've talked to you, we've had very fun, comfortable conversations. I never found you to be awkward. I don't find you to be awkward either. Maybe we just don't make each other awkward. Is that weird?

My mind just went to an Instagram app. Oh oh that was creep-tastic in my own mind that one that goes in close and does the little stars get programmed sorry it's all right but i honestly don't find you to be awkward like every time i've ever talked to you it's been very very comfortable very easy i agree but i would also say that's kind of a recent development that you and I are speaking. Well, it's when I started coming back to the comedy store. Yes. Which was what? A couple years ago?

Yeah. Three now? I guess three. Something. 14. November of 14, I think it was. Because we've been in each other's orbit since news radio. Yeah, but we didn't really get a chance to like

yeah hang out or be friends yeah till the store you know that's such an interesting little community right it's like everybody just kind of like yeah like when i talk about a positive community like i was just explaining this to someone the other day like when i first started going there in 1994 there was a lot of conflict between comedians there's like comedians that didn't like comedians like oh this guy doesn't like this guy and she doesn't like her and they all fucking yeah duked it out with each other a little bit there's none of that now yeah think about how supportive that place is it's amazing like everybody's friendly yeah i love it like there might be a hundred of us there on a regular basis, like, in and out, doing Sunday through Monday. Yeah.

And there's no conflicts. It's really fucking cool. I'm sure you've talked about this a million times. Did you ever stop going there for a chunk of time? I stopped for seven years. Oh, okay. Yeah. I stopped for seven years after I had that dispute with Carlos Macia.

Yeah. after I had that dispute with Carlos Macia. Yeah, that was when he was way more popular than me, like especially as a comic, and the comedy store took his side, and I was like, alright, fuck you guys. And I took off.

It wasn't really the comedy store either. It was this one guy who was the manager. Because Mitzi, actually, I called Mitzi and gave her the whole rundown of what was going on. I told her, and she's like, well, you just stay away from them. And then she gave me a spot that night, and then they called me up two hours later to tell me that I was banned. So I said, wait a minute, I just talked to Mitzi.

She gave me a spot. She told me when to go up. So if she's not running the store, who's deciding I'm banned? You are? What are you doing? Do you guys understand what this is? This is like a little, you're having a little battle

for whether or not you're going to let people profit off of crime. This is really what's happening. You have thought crime. You have intellectual crime. You have plagiarism. And you're allowing one person,

knowingly allowing them to profit off it and no one's doing anything about it so when one of us does something about it then you're going to punish that person you're basically highlighting everything that everyone was afraid of that's a good point what is like what were the what was the reason for your being banned because you were well because on their end of it like what was because we had made a video with me and Carlos arguing on stage, and then we put it online. Oh, right, okay. So they decided that this was somehow or another in violation

that should have been kept inside the club. And I'm like, you don't get it. You weren't protecting us. No one was protecting us. My fucking agent stumped me. Over that? Oh, yeah, over that. Yeah, I was with gersh they dropped me

holy we had they'd call me up to tell me they essentially in this long roundabout way were trying to say that i either had to apologize or they couldn't work with me anymore that was the gist of it and i had to make them spell it out okay let me say this really clear you tell me if this is what you're saying you're saying you want me to apologize or you can't work with me anymore. Well, we're done. You know, there's no apology and we're never going to work together. I appreciate everything you've done for me. And I was really nice to the guy who was, it wasn't his idea, my agent. So you're a great guy. I see you. I'm giving you a hug, but you guys have to understand that you're making a choice that's going to affect the rest of your life.

This isn't just a small thing. You only have a few. How many years do you have in this life? Well, this year is going to be highlighted by this decision. This is going to be a big. Why did the agent take that stand? Did they represent him as well? Oh, okay.

All right. So they needed to make nice. Well, he made way more money than me. So he was way more valuable to them. And so I'm like, you got to make, this is, you sell art. That's all you guys do. Okay, you're not making anything. You're just, if Mary Lynn comes up with a show, if this guy has a tour, if she's doing a this or he's writing a book, you make money off art.

That's who you make money off. Now, here you know a guy stealing other people's art. And your answer to that is we got to stop people that are exposing it. Did he ever change? I don't know. Not that it even matters. I hope he did. He's got to find Jesus.

Did he ever acknowledge it that he did it? Sort of. Yeah, sort of. And then he kind of took it back. It's hard to admit. Should I try one of these? Should I try this? Are that he did it? Sort of. Yeah, sort of, and then he kind of took it back. It's hard to admit. Should I try one of these? Should I try this? Are you ready for it?

Is it insane? I should only have like one sip, right? Fucking crazy. Do you know my friend Tate? Tate Fletcher? Uh-uh. You've probably seen him around the store before. Big giant gorilla.

It's his company. They're very good. I'm going to try it. Don't drink the whole thing, Mary Lynn. I like it, but I'm going to- You can do it. Can you drink a grande coffee? Yeah.

That's about a grande. Coffee's'm gonna do it if it's a grande coffee yeah that's about a grande coffee's worth of caffeine but it's strong no I gotta go workout I gotta go on your isolation tank find yourself I just found myself and I peed that's okay um so you started out as a performance artist like that was your idea what did you want to a performance artist. Like that was your idea. What did you want to do? That was your big idea. I went to art school for painting. And I got really frustrated when people started to critique the paintings. And I was supposed to be getting more serious in art school and more conceptual. And everyone was doing something

different and everyone was critiquing it in a different way and none of it made sense to me. And then the idea of having to sell that object that you made. So you're going to make something that's useless. I mean, it makes it sound like I don't like or appreciate art. I just, for me, I didn't, I couldn't grasp what the next thing to do was you know you're poor you're in art school you're making something and then you have to go sell and market that thing and uh i also was frustrated and kind of like boiling inside and needed to express myself so i started doing performance art in school. And then when you say performance art,

that's a pretty open-ended description, right? Oh, it's so open-ended. There were so many like weird performance art things that would happen. We, I mean, we had performance art class.

There was the guy that like taped his genitals to the side and put on lipstick in a mirror. And that was his performance art piece or the girl that like and we would all sit there and watch it oh my god that's so weird did you see his genitals did he go naked and pull it aside or how did he do that that's a really good question i like how your mind just went there you're like what actually happened i think i blocked it out because i think you could probably get away with doing that or the guise of it being something you're doing, you know, in a class somewhere.

Yes. Yeah. Yes. You could get away with that. So pervy. I think I was focused on his beautiful lips. I was trying to be polite and not look down there. Another woman was obese and her piece was she had pre-set up,

we weren't where she was doing the performance, butter pats in like dominoes, like, you know, Her piece was she had pre-set up, we weren't, where she was doing the performance, butter pats in like dominoes, like a few thousand of them in a line. And she was obese and she crawled on the ground. She didn't actually eat them, but it was something. That's weird. My mind kind of drops off. I remember specific parts of it, but I don't remember.

I think she just was collecting the butter pieces and crawling. And that was her performance piece another guy uh the uh this was i went to detroit and then finished in san francisco and san francisco is known for being a real uh performance art history a lot of the you know the most famous performance artists nobody knows where that was the scene was in san francisco so uh it was two-story, really beautiful campus overlooking. You could see Lombard Street on one side. You could see the water on the other side. Another guy's piece was to jump from the second story to a tree.

That he may or may not have made the jump. And that was his art piece. His art piece is jumping from a window to a tree? Yeah. What the fuck i know this other guy the room where we had our class he had a bread machine this was back you know bread machines were new technology had a bread maker you know those machines you can make a i guess it just does the dough right right maybe it bakes it i think it just needs the dough and then you bake it or i don't know if you bake it in the machine.

No, you bake it in the machine. It's all coming back to me. He bakes it in the machine. We come into the classroom as he's baking it. There's always like a reveal in these pieces, right? So we come in. He's taken plaster from the wall and put it in the bread. He's fed us the bread.

Half of us get it. Half of us don't. What? And there's plaster in the bread half of us get it half of us don't and there's plaster in the bread why do you put plaster in his bread it was something about communism some get the bread some don't but even if you get the bread, there's plaster in it. So in your face. What the fuck? Oh, my God. See, there's something about like performance art and slam poetry. I did slam poetry, too.

That was one of my. But you did. You know I did. Here's the best part. I got zeros. You got zeros? Yeah. You didn't get any.

Why? I never really wrote any poetry. I was just into the performance of it. And I... So you didn't have a poem? I think I was doing comedy. Oh, no. And they wanted a reel. And I was doing like an awkward thing.

I mean, which was very real for me. But I think I just wanted to express... I also had an ex-boyfriend who... He said that comedy was his life. This was when I was like 19. And I think I attached to people. I thought he was the shit because he would be rude to people. That was his version of comedy.

It was like bossing people around. Or one of his bits was having a whistle and directing traffic. I mean, really adolescent. But for some reason, I was really attracted to him. And I wanted to be him anybody who was like extroverted or something that i wanted that's i was attracted to that right so so he was like comedy is my life and i do this open mic and i was like i'm gonna do that open mic and i had taped like phrases to my body and phrases from commercials

or snippets of conversation that I had heard, and I went up and I started reading them. And then I would improvise a little bit, and I'd be like, waxy buildup or whatever, and just repeating, just letting it all filter through and come out my mouth for five minutes of whatever the open mic was. And I started getting laughter, but it was like awkward laughter after the fact of that uncomfortable, like, what is she doing?

But my commitment level was so high that the fact that it didn't make any sense just caused laughter, right? Right, right, right. Well, that works sometimes with just even with comics. Yes, absolutely. There's a lot of people that are just really odd. And if you saw them, you would get it. But if you saw what they wrote on paper or what they said just written down on paper, you would be like, what?

That doesn't make any sense. Yeah. Well, I thought you were going to say, which is a similar point, that it comes in the pause and after what they're saying even if it doesn't make any sense but you're saying sometimes people write things and it makes its own sense when you hear them say it yeah yeah i mean and but it's also just about being fully committed yes yes yes yeah and those pauses yeah that gives you especially if something's really absurd gives you that opportunity to go what yeah you don't want to just hammer them over the head with it. So you just started doing that,

and how did it lead to actual stand-up stand-up? It was a really fun time in San Francisco because the comedy clubs were closing, so a lot of comics were coming to these open mic poetry rooms, and one of my favorite rooms was in this bar. And also I was from the suburbs of Detroit, and so just being in San Francisco, that was a real city and a friendly city, you know, like it's small enough and it's beautiful and they have a real arts scene. And it was the first time that I had seen like a real counterculture and people that would hang out in coffee shops and a lot of young people that looked like I did.

that looked like I did. So I'd go to bars for this open mic and there'd be, you know, like a transvestite who was semi homeless, but was, you know, made up who was like reading her poetry. And I was like, I'm in like, I'm done. And I had no money. And I would sit and crouch on the floor and drink like a half a beer and be like oh this is crazy and i would watch her read from her journal and i did a similar thing where i would just and it was always i didn't i didn't know my own mind or my own thoughts really so i would write down random words and i would perform it i mean and still now it's you know i've progressed a bit but it's like it informs you how the audience reacts or it begins to and And I just love seeing all these different people and what they thought they were saying

versus what they were really saying and what their intended effect was and how people were really seeing them. Anyway, so comics started dropping into these rooms, like Patton Oswalt and Jeremy Kramer and Blaine Kepatch and Greg Barrett, all these uh Ron Lynch people that were more uh San Francisco affiliated that were there at that time would start doing these open mic nights um but because a comic is so versed in their own voice that watching them was so I was

like oh that they know how to speak and they're more polished. And then that was attractive to me. So I kind of gravitated towards, and there were all these alternative rooms that weren't comedy clubs. And that was like, I loved that. I just loved it.

Because there was room for mistakes. There was room for the in-between. It was like the real alt scene of that time. Yeah. That alt scene is interesting. It's always interesting when like a little branch of a style of comedy breaks off. You know? And some people do it because that's like it feels more true to them.

Right. And then some people do it because it seems like the cool hip thing to do. And then some people it's just a combination of both, right? The alt scene's an interesting scene. You know, because it also is attached to that one place that doesn't pay anybody. The UCB. Yeah. I was always like, wait, what?

Oh, you mean because they're making money and no one else is making money? Yeah. I was always like, what? Huh? Like, how does that make sense? People don't get paid at comedy clubs as well. Well, sure they do. Comedy store pays you.

You mean like 25 bucks? 25 bucks for regular sets, and then you get a lot more than that if you do the main room. Right. The main room, they pay you real money. So you're saying why doesn't UCB throw 25 bucks to to people you have to pay of something people are paying to go there right paying for gas they're they're traveling there right you're selling tickets to see them do their art right yeah but if you're gonna take that line then everybody should be paid a lot more there should be a genuine

percentage it's really only the car like going back to that argument from the Comedy Store yeah yeah these but that was it's a legit argument yeah it's not It's really only the comedy store. We're like going back to that argument from the comedy store from the 70s. But it's a legit argument. I mean, it's not legit that, look, this is where we live, and it's a really important place to work out. Right. So we need it, and we want it to be there. Yeah. And they pay you a little bit, but if they didn't pay you anything, like the comedy store went UCB and just didn't pay anybody anything.

Oh, that's interesting. So you're saying even that little amount isn't important. It's something. Yeah. Like, especially it was important when the club wasn't making any money. So if the club, I mean, the old days of the OR, you know, you got that $25. Like, look, they're giving $25 to

15 people. Fine. How much money are they really making? I get what you're saying. Because UCB, you're saying, has that vibe of like, hey, it's a workshop. And you're like, you guys are making money off of it. They're opening up new places. Right. I mean, this is a business, right?

I'm not telling them what to do or telling anybody who performs what to do. I've performed there before. Right. It's just, it's kind of weird. It's like these festivals. I got invited to one of those festivals once. They offered to give me a pass, like a gold pass where I could watch all the other acts. That's what they were going to pay me with. They weren't going going to fly me they weren't going to put up right in a hotel they weren't going to give me any money it reminds me of that thing in steve

martin's book where he's where he made that choice and again very different time very different scene where he's like i'm only headlining for money like he made that conscious choice that would not work now and like you said we you know i work out in town i don't expect to get paid but it does it makes a difference that the comedy store there's a that system that is in place really works you know it's like i'm a paid regular that was a big deal yeah because i remember i had been on on the road doing comedy really for the first time in the club proper even though i had tons of stage time but you know back connecting it back to that alt scene where it would be a different thing every time and

i didn't not quite know what i was saying so you know in the past four years was when i did the six shows per weekend and you're like i'm your entertainment for the night and i you know learned how to do that like right when people came out to see you yes and like don't mumble tell them what you're talking about repeat your theme you know smile talk to people uh you know i learned how to do that and um what was my point do you feel in any way confined by that because your beginnings were so sort of free. I think it's like a reverse. The confinement of that is serving me because I needed to do that. It took me, I went about it like completely opposite.

I was so organic that now I'm finally getting some structure. I'm like for the first time like, oh, that's a joke. I heard a joke. I honestly was like, like I said, I had no idea why people were laughing I knew I liked it, but I wasn't exactly sure where it was gonna come and I knew That I had a deep connection to it. You know, that's what propelled me to do it I had a need to do it. Mm-hmm. It was the only thing and it kind of saved me I needed to I mean not to get all

overly dramatic but comedy kind of saved you performing yeah because i just was really um didn't know how to express myself and it's still to this day is like an ever kind of deepening thing you know yeah it's a very weird discipline right yeah it's a weird thing to uh get involved with you know chase down these ideas and try to figure out how to flesh them out and do you structure you feel like you were always um because i see you as somebody who's like so powerful and such such a strong point of view and strong belief system. Do you feel like you've always kind of been that way? No, I don't think so. I think comedy for sure makes you chase down those ideas.

Like what is your real feelings on things? Yeah. Because you're thinking about things so often. And then as you're saying things, you're thinking about people's reaction to them. That's a big one. A big one is that comedy has allowed me to really pay attention to other people's reaction to them. That's a big one. A big one is that comedy has allowed me to really pay attention to other people's reactions more than like, I think I wanted to, because I think if I had my own way and I had nothing to do with standup, I probably would be way more antisocial,

way more guarded and protected and way more insecure because I hadn't answered those questions. I didn't pose them on myself because they made me uncomfortable. Yeah. So what stand up allowed me to do is like, I wasn't the most outgoing person. Really? Yeah, yeah. I was very insecure. And even so, I'd get like social anxiety.

I've talked about this before, but I would like talking to a bank teller. I'd know that I'm next to talk to the bank teller and I'd kind of freak out. I wouldn't know how to, I wouldn't exactly know how to talk and say things and do it right. But it changed from teaching martial arts. When I started teaching martial arts, I learned how to project in front of like

this big room full of people, which is something I never imagined I was going to do. Any public speaking before that, it was never on the menu. I never even thought about it. But when I taught classes, I had to teach them. And I was teaching, like, in universities. I taught at BU.

And I taught at some other places, some other gyms and stuff. And, you know, you have to get these people's attention. You have to be clear. And you have to have confidence. But I knew what I was doing with martial arts. Right. I was just going to ask you that. It probably helped a lot.

For sure. Even if you were nervous, you were like, let the skill kind of take over. Yeah. We would oftentimes, if we opened up a new school somewhere, we'd do a demonstration

and then we'd give a speech afterwards, explain what the martial arts were but we'd do a demonstration first. People would hold boards and shit and you'd kick them and stuff like that which we never did in real life. We only did for demonstrations.

We never trained that way. But my point was like getting into standup, I didn't have a particularly clean point of view. I think I was 21 years old. I was thinking I was a moron. You know, I didn't have any life experience other than martial arts and girls. Like that was all I could talk about. And I didn't, I knew martial arts weren't really funny.

So it was just relationship stuff. But, um. um hey guys how about when we hit that block we don't really do that am I right what's up with us kicking those blocks of wood guys I mean seriously yeah I mean I had a a similar thing of it it helps yeah to just even say anything and to be like oh i exist i have a voice and i'm just now starting to i mean i have a lot of material that's true but i'm just now kind of starting to build that deeper um the belief system thing you know like i talk about my personal life and there are kernels of things in there but it's it's scary to kind of come out yeah but it's fun because that's what people want you know that's what like that's what gets it going and that's what gets everybody

excited and that's what uh it's cool yeah you know what comedy has taught me one really important thing as a person you you're not done. Like there's no done. There's no like you're a finished product. Yeah, I did it. No, you're changed depending upon your attitude about how you look at your very existence right now. Like it can shift within an hour. It can shift back and forth.

It can shift in a day or two. It's like if you take a few weeks off of stand-up. I was just going to ask you that. Is it hard for you to get back? Yeah, it always feels weird. I haven't done it very often. But I did it a couple of times in my career where I got like surgery or something like that. And I had to take some time off.

And then I got burnt out once, maybe like five years ago. And I took three months off. That was crazy. That was real weird. But then when I got back into it it it was before i came back to the store too so it was a real issue with me like going on stage like the improv never felt like home it was like a place to fuck around it's a nice club but it never i didn't hang out there it just felt weird didn't feel the same so i'd just do a set there and then i'd get out of here

so i was missing like the camaraderie aspect of it and i just finished a special and i just didn't want to do anything for a while i wanted to chill and so i took like three months off but then when i came back i came back with uh like a lot of purpose like i really was enthusiastic about i'd been thinking about coming back for like a couple of weeks before i actually did it but um you you're always working at it, like always. It's always, you're always in the process of like reaffirming, thinking things through, understanding who you are. You know, it varies with your health, varies with how you're eating. It varies with who's in your life.

Like your comedy radically varies, like how you interface with an audience radically, how you look at yourself, all that varies so much. It's never done. Have you ever been on stage and just been, not angry, but not enjoying, kind of not wanting to be on stage, and it shows in your performance,

or do you always get out of it through performing? Or speaking it? You can get upset. There was a woman who kept heckling me in the front row of the comedy store. Just interrupting. Just stopping bits before I had a chance to explain them. And then finally I had to kick her out. And it was so annoying.

The way she did it, it was so entitled. Like she was entitled to voice out her opinion in the middle. It was a but I was doing this chunk Last year on my last special about this guy who broke into the White House That a guy just broke into the White House You would think there would be all these things in place to keep someone from breaking the White House The guy just humped across the lawn ran across the lawn got to the front door There was only a girl sitting there one unarmed girl by herself he smacked her the ground and just ran to the white house and i had this whole bit about whose idea it was to have this leave a girl by herself i think i've

seen you yeah and then i said that this is the part like this lady interrupted me um i said you know a lot of people think that women can do everything men can do right and i go well that doesn't make sense because men can't even do everything men can do. So I was in the middle of saying that doesn't even make sense because, and the joke is, and I explained to her, I go, the joke is, lady, I've met Shaquille O'Neal, and his dick is where my face is. And if the White House is experiencing a shack attack,

I'm the wrong dude to save the world. He's going to run me over but you know and that i tried to explain that and like she just wanted to interrupt anything that had to do with men or women so that was annoying and i did not have a good set that night because it was like jesus christ just get the fuck out of here and had a kid and she apparently had done that to some guys that were on before and she was so drunk when i was looking at her their eyes weren't focusing it's just some smart lady that was drunk that thought she could stop what she thought was sexism probably because she was drunk but there's a difference between like you then overcoming it and being like haha that was awesome and then the feeling of i think

what i'm that was tense yeah like where you're of, I think what I'm... I was tense. Yeah, like where you're just inside your own head going, I don't want to be here. Like that sucked. Like it's not fun. It wasn't that. It was just like, I shouldn't have allowed myself to get so upset. But I came into the stage upset. That was part of the problem is that I had a crazy day

with a lot of fucked up things happened. And I carried that energy onto the stage. There was a lot of weird shit that happened in my life that day. It was just like enough, enough, fucking enough. And then her. Yeah.

It was like weird shit with friends and a couple of weird business things. It was like a compounding day. And then this lady was hammered and just, and I gave her the bed. I tried to talk her into just release. And I explained her, this is how the bit would have gone. If you didn't interrupt, I go, okay, get it. See, I'm going to her into just release. And I explained to her, this is how the bit would have gone if you didn't interrupt. I go, okay, get it.

See, I'm going to say something outrageous. Then I'm going to say something more fucked up about myself. This is what I do. So I did it again. And she interrupted again. I'm like, get the fuck out. Just get out. Just get out.

But I was really upset. And you shouldn't really get upset. So when you allow yourself to get really upset upset it's usually because you came into it unbalanced and again right it's always you're not you're never done like you might think well i understand how to behave now i've got my together i get it but you don't you do you get it right now but if you let it slip you won't get it tomorrow if you have the wrong attitude or the wrong approach and the wrong dude cuts you off. You're like, fuck off.

Like, ah, where'd that come from? Shit. You know? And going back to what we were talking about earlier, when you said you're not awkward, I,

two things. you are, you're much more of a teddy bear now than you used to be. Don't you think? I've never thought of myself as a teddy bear, but well, when I see you now now you're just like you're just not i'm not saying you weren't like this before but you just are so like positive and

loving loving and kind of like you know you can feel it whereas and you know there's a lot of baggage in the past and and we never not baggage but like i was like oh that guy hates women oh that guy hates me but that was also when duncan was hanging out with you you know he and i just broke up so that was the baggage i was referring to but like oh yeah i just thought you know you have such a strong energy that i was like oh that guy and i not that i it's weird because i wasn't like i just, I just never pictured us talking easily. Yeah. I'm not saying that it wouldn't have happened then because it just didn't,

but I was like, whoa, what's up with that dude? I get it. I've said on stage a bunch of times that I look like a sexist. Like I look like I would be a dick. That's what I look like. There's not much you can do. If you lift weights and you have a fat head, you look like a dick. I just, that's what I look like. You know, there's like not much you could do. But if you lift weights and you have a fat head, you know, you look like a dickhead. There's just, right?

There's no way around it. What was that thing? I was like kind of watching some of your recent podcasts where it was like, what are the shirts that are feminine for? Oh, the future is feminine. The future is feminine. I want to wear, I want to wear the future is masculine and you wear the future is feminine. The future is feminine. I want to wear I want to wear

the future is masculine and you wear the future is feminine and then we just walk around like for whatever that image of yourself I'm like the equal

but opposite. Like if I built my compound it'd be like crystals and lavender and soft. You know what the problem with that statement

the future is feminine is is the problem with that statement The future is feminine is Is the problem with every single statement You cannot boil down the future To one fucking sentence You just can't It's preposterous I would like to just wear the future is masculine And just not acknowledge it

What's up Yeah the future is masculine guys Get used to it You should roll a pack of cigarettes in one of your sleeves. Like the Fonz. Fuck you, man. Is that masculine for you? Yeah, no, it makes no sense.

No, it's silly. Oh, and then the other thing that when I was talking about going on the road, which I was going to mention coming back to the store, because I was there in the 90s too, and it was just like a terrible place and a bad vibe. Weird vibe, right? Dark and dank. What year did you get there?

I moved to L.A. in 94, and I was in San Francisco for a couple years before that. 94 or 95 or something like that. Did you perform at the clubs in San Francisco as well? I did bars. Did you do the punchline? You did bars? I never did the punchline have you still done it have you done it since I have yeah it's great amazing it's great I love this is amazing I love

it yeah Cobbs was a little strange big ceiling it's so big and the people are way back there that are in the balcony they're way back oh my gosh hi hi back there my husband who like he used to before we had a child he used to come see my one-woman show that I did. I think he came like every, anyway, he saw me at Cobb's and he sat back there. And it was a great assessment because he goes, you've gotten really good because I had been on the road. But he goes, that's a really hard room because these people, especially that late show, like they've just had dinner and they're there and it's so dark. And it's like a room i don't know some people love it but it's a room that's sort of seen its heyday at a different time

that it would be packed out i don't know maybe you like it if you pack it out and they're there to see you i do like that room but it's a different room than it used to be i used to do the old cobs that's where i met um man i did uh that's where i met al magical al magical started working together in like 1990 fucking eight or something really yeah it was a long time ago but um the old one was tiny like just a little bit bigger than the belly room i mean it was like i like that like a hundred seats or something like that was really ridiculously small i think i might be off by a little. It might be like 130, but they would stuff everybody in there to get 130,

and it was this tiny little club, and I used to work it, even though it would actually, I could make less money there than I could at the Punchline. I liked it better. I was like, this place is better. It's grimy. It's tiny,

and then Tom Sawyer, the guy who ran it, was a huge comedy nerd like the dude really loved comedy and so i liked that and i'm like good he's supporting good comedy fuck it so i started going there so then when they turned it to the new place i was like this is the opposite of what you guys right you guys were the most intimate club and now you're like one of the most cavernous that makes sense because yeah clubs have be like, they've got to be right on top of you. Oh, I was going to say, I came back from going on the road for the first time and doing the six shows and I was on 24, which I love that we're just full on comedy shop talking, by

the way. We do that all the time. I do that all the time. Does it feel unusual no no i know i like it i like it um i just got a little self-conscious for a minute like anyway the rooms and the ceiling and this is interesting funny thing but it's i think people enjoy it too because they like hearing people who are professionals talk about what makes it good and what makes it and then when they're there themselves like oh yeah the room's kind of

high in this place. Oh, this place is intimate. Okay, so I was on, you gave me the confidence to get back in it. So I was on 24 when it came back and we filmed in London because it had been done for like two years and they brought it back. And it was the end of that airing

and it was the first time I was going on the road as a comic. So because my face was on tv and people are super into 24 my show's packed out the first time I had ever gone on the road right my first 45 50 minute show and I first hit the stage at like side splitters Tampa or whatever you know it's like you all your shows are sold out and um first of all, my opener and my middle are like, this is great. It's sold out.

But then when they got on the stage, they come off, they're like, your audience is weird because they're 24 fans and they were, they don't come out to clubs. Right. Like I would sometimes have somebody sitting like with a, this guy had an article of clothing that I had worn in season three.

So I'm like trying to do comedy. Like, okay. Like you just want me to sign your thing. But you know, and my approach was, cause I'm in my own head. So I'm like trying to do comedy, like, okay, like you just want me to sign your thing. But you know, and my approach was, cause I'm in my own head. So I'm like,

hi, so my name is Mary Lynn and doing, doing my, like I'm uncomfortable and that's where my comedy comes from. And the whole vibe was like, what, you know, like you're a TV star.

Like we came to see you and I, and I had to adjust and like, take that in and then not only take it in, but talk about it, you know, like, you know, and I would just be like Jack Bauer and they'd be like, like losing their shit. And like, I would just make somebody in the audience, like you're my Jack Bauer. And then I just, you know, had to make it like five, 10, 15 minutes of like, let's talk about it because it was such an amazing thing. You know, and it was to me too, but I had this whole, that was the only drama I had ever been on.

And I had this whole other world of comedy that I had been doing, but the intersection of that was just like bizarre. But then I, you know, like you said, you're never done and you never know what's going to happen and you adjust to it. So I would do the 24 stuff

and then I would go into my stuff. That's my stuff about my life and my personal life and you adjust to it. So I would do the 24 stuff and then I would go into my stuff. That's my stuff about my life and my personal life and my point of view. And, uh, then that became really gratifying, you know, once I sort of brought them in, like did the thing that they needed to hear about, which is also part of my life. So, you know, how long did it take before they stopped coming to see you because you're from 24 and started coming to see you because you're a funny comic? Oh, I'm still waiting for that to happen.

I'm still hoping for a career in comedy. No, seriously. Well, then it dropped off, right? So I did that same circuit a year and a half later, and there would be some super fans, there would be some comedy fans, and there would be some people that didn't know why the hell they were there so so then i would have yeah the guy that knows me from always sunny in philadelphia the lady that knows me from 24 and

the guy who's out of his mind on drugs going you're not funny and i'm like you know that this poor person's like she's a superstar like why is she in this shithole and the other guy's like i don't know who she is and that guy's guy's like, you don't get what I get because she's from Always Sunny in Philadelphia. And then I would pit them against each other. I'm like,

she doesn't get it, but you get it. And it's like, oh, the burden of being so versatile, you know? It's such a cross to bear. It must have been

a fun transition though once you got through the initial stages because a lot of people would have bailed. Like a lot of people, okay, fuck doing the road.

This is just too crazy. It's too weird. I it i mean it sucks but i love it it's awesome but it's it's sort of changed who you are then right like who what you think of yourself you're like a real comic now yeah yeah i can't you know for so many years i had that little like oh you haven't done the road like you haven't really done it and now i'm like no i i know how to do this fuck there's so many people that don't do the road that i wish would leave you know oh my god you got to experience it you got to go out there you but they don't want to do like the shitty road well you have to do the shitty road i also learned something about myself the shitty road um because i would i would not have a car and i'd take the hotel that they gave me that would be by the freeway that would be not even near the city and a little bit from the club and I just hole up and then I

it took me a while to realize like oh you like that like I like a certain amount of suffering and like uh so shitty here I'm gonna go like walk along the freeway and then you know someone would be like why don't you why didn't you get a car like i don't know i just walked over to chili's for lunch and uh along the grass on the side of the freeway i like it i like it so you actually like the dinginess of weird cities is that what you're saying yeah or i don't know. The part of me likes the shittiness of it. Just a, like there was one, I don't know why there was one hotel room that had like a,

a dining room table for 10 and like this big, these big plastic flowers with dust all over them. And this weird hot plate with foil on it and a walk-in closet. But it was the shittiest, most run down like who's who's partying in here like who's fancy hotel suite is this it couldn't have been shittier and it was yeah i guess it's just fascinating and and i i like being comfortable you know i like having my things but i guess i like that too yeah i like feeling

the pain of that whatever whatever i'm just not being comfortable but also because it's in contrast to your life in l.a right i mean yeah tv star got some cash right so then you uh all the time i see those pictures on your Instagram. You just throw it on the road. Diamonds and gold. Just throwing it up in the air. Your thing is isolation tank. Mine is I get in one of those blowers where the money,

that's what I do in the morning. I just get in my little room. I'm like, money. It's just a cyclone of hundreds. Surround me. I get a money massage. Yeah, it's so great But when you're in the road

And you're in like a shitty hotel In Pittsburgh It's in the middle of January You look out and the sky is like a Shitty dark smoky grey There's not even a hint of sun It's noon you look out Nothing

Everybody's got this look on their face Everybody's just sourpuss You're just wiping dust off the window so i like that weird air conditioning or heater that doesn't really work and just my favorite is the ones that crank on yeah yeah yeah in the middle of the night you can't control them fucking asshole i once had a lady in a hotel room. How did this go? She was the receptionist. God, it's all a blur.

I don't even remember what city it is. One of those low mid hotels. She calls me. I'm napping. It's like after you do the radio or something, I'm napping. Oh, hi. There's a fan down here with a bottle of wine for you. Can I send him up? Swear to God. I've never felt more unsafe or on the verge of a breakdown. you're the gateway between but it was such a small town and it was such a foreign concept to her to me I was like

that's inherent right you're the protection that I have should I send him up a stranger who stopped at the hotel with a bottle of wine he's got a bottle of drugs for you should I send him up

seems like a good move and then you know what i did as i actually took his i could hear him in the background going no no that's okay like he actually was a nice guy but nice enough of a person that would do that wanted to bring a bottle of wine that was i think that was her idea and so then i started like instead of going what the fuck are you talking about? I just went, okay, well, I'll come down and get it. And then I came down and met him. But it was so unsettling. And that was her idea.

It wasn't his idea. But instead of saying, don't do that and setting her straight, I took the middle road. How well did you go back to sleep after that? Not so good, right? I drank that bottle of wine and had the best show of my life. You were hungover at the show. Yeah, that's creepy. Ali Wong has a great bit.

I'm not going to do it justice. And I don't want to paraphrase it either. And I don't want to tell anybody what it's about. But it's essentially the difference between life for a woman comic on the road versus a male comic you know it's a big difference yeah the uh the danger level like that's like guys that get to get obsessed with you you know want to bring you wine and shit and like that stuff that's got to be weird i had another guy it was the guy who held the sweater he's like it's your sweater from season three so he bought it somehow online he bought it and then after the sweater he's like it's your sweater from season three so you bought it somehow online

he bought it and then after the show he won he showed me i don't know what's wrong with me because i'm like he was a really nice guy like this is a terrible situation but i for whatever reason i'm like he needs me to listen to him right now and i stood there like what is wrong with me he had two thick photo books of the thousands of dollars of memorabilia and the pictures of all the items and the itemized of shit from the show. And again, I'm there. I'm looking around like, anybody seeing this? Just me and him? Okay, yeah, you guys continue cleaning.

Because that's the weird thing, too. Because I'm a superstar on one end. But on the other end, it's like, not really. I don't have the money. I'm not bringing anyone with me. I'm, you know, I'm like a regular headliner on the road. Most places do have security though, right? Most places. Yeah, sure.

Yeah. They just probably weren't aware that they should be paying attention. Yeah, maybe they thought that's a friend of hers. It's also a weird thing. Like, when do you you step in the guy's got a bunch of books filled with memorabilia okay like when that seems okay like that doesn't like it's just a he's a very very very enthusiastic fan yes but like at what point in time is everybody go hey hey hey hey what and you know ultimately i'm glad i did it because i feel like i validated him even though I wanted to go like, what happened? You spent $75,000 on all this stuff.

But what can you do? So I was like, this is great. You can give him a lock of your hair. You did a really good job. She just reached out with a pair of scissors. This is for you. And if you're listening, you did do a really good job. And you have a lot of really cool stuff that no one else has.

There you go. And i'm happy for you was it's always weird when you're a comic too and you're or you're comedian in nature and um you you do something that's not comedic right yeah like if you're a comedian and you do a drama show like 24 was basically like a drama right yeah it's one of the most serious shows ever ever right super drama i think i messed up no i should have just rolled into another drama she's like i had to open my mouth and show everybody how not a computer genius i am like what is wrong with me? I've set up obstacles. You know we're from 24.

What? Welcome, the comedy stylings of... Do you remember when Richard Belzer got on Law & Order? Oh, yeah. And everybody was like, what? And then stop being funny. Like, he doesn't do any comedy anymore, I don't think. Right.

I think that show... I gotta clean up my act should i only be funny now or should i get on another drama well i think you should stay funny just be the funny just do that oh i never completed this whatever the story of going through being on the road and then coming back to the store and thinking like i got it because I've been on the road, right? Right. Coming back, doing the main room, don't got it at all. Dry mouth, terrible set. Guy in the front row is miming falling asleep and mouthing to me how boring I am because I'm like, wow, it was intense.

But that's also the beauty of the store because you're like, oh, that was one thing on the road and this is another thing like you got to go deeper and get real It's running with a weight vest on that's what I describe it You can run fast with a weight vest on if your legs are strong But otherwise you're gonna be fucked. Yeah, I love it. No. Yeah, it's It's an intense place. I remember you and I were talking about something there once, like fairly recently, like within the last year. Were you like, I don't know what I'm doing?

Oh, yeah, I told you. I'm like, I'm quitting. I quit. Were you serious? I couldn't tell if you were serious. Yeah, of course, deadly. That's me every six days. Or if I take more than two days off, I'm like, I'm done.

I don't need to talk to anybody or go anywhere or do anything like I'm done like that's my nature that's what I fight with what brings you back what gets you from there to fuck it I'll just go do it I just force myself but you don't have a 100% confidence in your future resolve. Like, you don't. No. In the future, do you think there's going to come a time where just a week turns into a month, turns into a year? It could.

And then 24 again comes on. Didn't they do 24 with the black guy? Yes. Wasn't that recent? Yes. Is that still okay? Is a black guy? Wasn't that recent? Yes. Is that still okay? Is it still good? No, it's done.

Yeah, they did it with a whole new cast. Yeah. I think it went one season. Well, that's what happens, fucking white people. You ruined it. Thanks, white people. Thanks, white people. You didn't promote it good enough.

You promoted it great for Kiefer Sutherland. Oh, I didn't understand where you're going with that. Yeah. Black actor, and you fucking half-ass and cancel it before people grew to love it. I think that was a pretty tough... Act to follow? Yeah. Yeah, I'm sure.

Yeah, people get angry when you redo something. Yeah. You know, you call it the same thing. Like, fuck off. It's not 24. I'm going to come up with another name. Huh? Yeah, i think that was a hard the world's in trouble starring i like that super cool black guy who was the guy that played the cory hawkins is that right don't know who that gentleman yeah he's great um they fucked him yeah white people fucked them over. White people. Yeah. Yeah. I hate white people.

That's my take on it. So are you going to do a special, you think? I'd like to. I'd like to. You should. I want, yes. I think you're very funny. Thanks, girl.

I do. Thank you. I do. I think you're hilarious. I'm glad you're doing it still. When you were telling me that, that you were going to quit, I was like, you know. You were my angel that night. You really were.

You lifted me up from the depths. I love that you're like, were you serious? I'm like, no, you lifted me up from the depths of hell. Well, I could tell you were really down. I was like, that's crazy. I know who's funny. You're hilarious. And you're really nice.

You know? So I was like, you know. It's a weird thing to do. It's a. You're hilarious. And you're really nice. You know? So it was like, you know. It's a weird thing to do. It's a weird thing to do. And maybe you don't have to. None of us do it, really. I mean, there's going to come a point in time in my life where I'm probably like, I'm not going to do this anymore.

But for right now. But that's cool that you love the live show as much as you do. It's the struggle. I really enjoy struggling. I do. I think it's very important. It's very important for my balance as a person, especially me. I have maniacal genetics.

My brain just has to be constantly overrun with things to think about and do. My brain just wants to go. Just come up. Let's go. We need more fucking stimulation. Let's go. It always needs something. So what I do is just stuff it, fill it with information, work it out,

get it to run hills and do jujitsu and yoga and burn that motherfucker out so that I could be calm. And so a lot of what people notice today versus how I was like 20 years ago is it's just I understand myself better. I'm better at managing my, like whatever are the things that make you you, I'm better at managing those to be very positive, to just be just overall,

and my attitude is very different too. It's overall just nicer to people. And how did you become nicer just realized that when i'm at my best that's who i am and the only variation between that and when i'm at wait do you think you weren't nice before yeah i was nice i just wasn't as nice as i am now i've always been nice but i've always been nice i'm quicker to pull the trigger back then right you know and I'm less much you remember we're at the Comedy Store this was pretty recently

and that guy came into the bathroom when I was in there you totally pulled like the best male like strong guy it was it was so good you You're like, because I think the guy was like on coke or a combo of something. And again, it's like, do I not have regard for my own being? Because a part of me kind of left my body and was like, wow, this guy is crazy. Because he's like, give me a kiss. And it's like in the women's bathroom. Right, right, right. And then I think someone, he had done it to someone else. So it was kind of going around. And then I ran into you and I was like, yeah, that just happened right right and then i think someone he had done it to

someone else so it was kind of going around and then i ran into you and i was like yeah that just happened to me and you were like what where is he and you were immediately like i'm gonna beat his ass but simultaneously you were like get security to get this guy it was so awesome well that guy was a creep it was so creepy i was upset that i wasn't there as it was happening. I know. Yeah. That's unfortunate that you're always going to have to. But I rarely enjoy that response that you had. I was like, that was awesome.

I like this. You rarely enjoy it. I could be a lady after all. I just don't know how to do it. I miss the boat. But I think the only reason why you can enjoy it is because it is in stark contrast to how I behave when people are nice. So you realize there's a difference, right? It's like it's break glass in case of emergency. That was an emergency.

This is a real creep it's cool to see that so many coked up assholes at that fucking store lately there's so many coked up weirdos are there coke must be making a comeback in hollywood it must be i'm kind of like put my blinders onto it probably should there's a lot of people with fucking bright eyes and ideas and business plans ideas theyas. They want to fucking pitch you some things. By the way, that's what I need. If you're the overactive, I'm the opposite. Like, if I see a bed out of the corner of my eye, I'm like, oh, that could be great right now.

Like, that's my avoidance tactic. Just like, just go to sleep. Yeah, I can't do that. It doesn't work. I just lie there and think. But my sort of road is discovering, like, my hidden anger core, I'm like, oh, like, peeling off the layers of, like, oh, she's uncomfortable. She's quiet.

She doesn't react. And it's like, no, no, no, they're in there. You've just buried them, like, all of your feelings in, like, politeness. And so that's, comedy has helped me with that, too. Because early on, I was, like, way too reactive. I'd be like, oh, what do you think? Like talking to an audience member, it's like, no, you're in control. Like you tell them where it's going, you steer it.

Like, yes, you can listen to it. But so that's it's teaching me that as well. How to like drive the train instead of like, I'm going to be open to you and listen and go wherever you want me to go, you know, and just react to you. There's also like, there's a weird feedback loop thing going on there because people like it when you go, oh, well, what do you think? So you like the fact that they like that you do that. And then you avoid the conflict that way. But then you have to swallow it for the rest of the day. It's, you know.

Totally. That's so true yeah well i mean it's like i said like being a person and being a comic very similar in that you're never done you're just never done you know you're always trying to fix that thing always trying to tweak it make it a little better and then that's like one of the big arguments for writing new material too the idea is that every time you write a new act especially when you have to like release a special or something like that you're going to be better because you you understand comedy better than you did two years ago you're just going to be better if you've really been paying attention and you really are looking at it correctly you're going

to be better but god it's so hard because you're right you want to avoid it you want to go to that bed it's right there it's right there raylan so comfy so cozy pets cats fluff pillow oh you get your pets in the bed with you oh yeah i had to keep them out because my allergies but then when they sneak in and surround me what are you allergic to everything you have cats and dogs and you're allergic to them yeah my husband got the cat that's what put it over the edge i had two dogs for the longest time and i ignored it and then it's the weather and the cat and i just went over this edge where i always had like this really bad cold and then i finally had to go and i tried all the uh organic things and i finally had to go and i tried all the uh organic things and i

finally had to go and get the like twice a week but when they tested it it was like everything just like paper and pollen and pets and uh paper you're allergic to paper yeah wow uh but then i got those shots twice a week and what the shots do i kind of miss my allergist we would have little four minute chats. It's like you're inoculating. So you start doing a little bit and then you build up your tolerance. So they can inoculate you for cat dander? Mm-hmm. Really? Yeah. That's what an allergy shot is. I didn't even know that there were allergy shots.

Yeah. And it's like a little cocktail of like all the things, cocktail for me of all the things that I'm allergic to and then i just build up my tolerance wow so now if you're around a cat nothing yeah i cuddle him no shit we make out well you make out yeah and it used to be if a cat just like licked you or touched your hand or something like that you would get like a little little rub like a little red area. Yeah. Or like, yeah, inflamed. Yeah, one of my daughters is allergic to cats. We had to figure it out. Took a while.

She'd like wake up with puffy eyes and then we got her tested and realized it was a cat. So what'd you do? She takes a pill. No, no. The cat went to my other daughter, my oldest daughter.

Oh, okay. So she's got it at her apartment. I used to be allergic to feathers. I remember sleeping over someone's house. It depends on like where my system is daughter my oldest oh okay so she's got it in her apartment i used to be allergic to feathers i remember sleeping over someone's house it depends on like where my system is of how it affects me sometimes yeah like laying on a feather pillow yeah yeah whoa i know people that are allergic to like like styrofoam i've heard of people allergic to like certain types of plastic and shit yeah just coming in contact with certain plastics make them break out.

Am I making this up? It feels like bullshit. I got the EpiPen once. Whoa. From getting the shots. That was really exciting. So you got the shots, your body went into shock because of all the allergic shocks. Yeah.

And then they had a fucking boom right in the thigh. Yeah. And my allergist was like, he did it in my arm but he he said i i didn't even raise it that much but i went home and i was reading and i'm like god i itchy oh i must i must have been sweating like i worked out and i need i didn't for like a full 10 minutes i wasn't conscious i was just subconsciously going man i gotta go take a shower or something and And then I lifted up and it was like, like traveling. And then I just was like, I'm having an attack. Like I need a Benadryl.

I'm like, no one was listening to me. And I'm like, I think I need a Benadryl. And I didn't, I was looking for the Benadryl, couldn't find it, called my allergist. And he goes, yeah, just come here right now. And then I drove there just like so scared because I could feel it traveling. And I'm, like, you know, panicking but also trying to, like, manage. Like, when you panic and it's a good thing because you have to act fast. And then I thought, oh, are my eyes going to close up?

Is my throat going to close up? And then went in there, full-on EpiPen. This is awesome. It was really good. It felt like it honestly felt like I was about to go on stage. Ooh, like a rush. Yeah, it was kind of great feeling but it's almost like it like feels like tinny and like real trebly like like you get like for a few seconds.

Tinny and trebly. That's interesting. Yeah, like not even caffeine, like beyond caffeine. But yeah, like a pure adrenaline. It felt like a real exciting stand-up show. Like, wow, I'm really excited to go on stage right now. And that immediately stops the allergic reaction? Yeah. Wow, that's incredible. I like it. What do you got? That's what it is? The Ep the allergic reaction? Yeah. Wow. That's incredible.

I liked it. What do you got? That's what it is? Epipen? Oh, wow. That's crazy. I've done that on an episode of 24 where the character dies and Epipen in the heart and they wake back up. So epinephrine is adrenaline. Wow.

It was awesome. I liked it. I would do it every day if I could. You should do it every day. It's a hormone neurotransmitter and medication. Epinephrine is normally produced by both the adrenal glands and certain neurons. It plays an important role in the fight or flight response by increasing blood flow to the muscles. That's the tinny treble feel. Oh, wow. Pupil dilation.

Wow. And then that other stuff that you get from cold shock proteins, that's nupil dilation. Wow. And then that other stuff that you get from cold shock proteins, that's norepinephrine. Is that what that is? Yeah, it sounds right. What's that? Dr. Rhonda Patrick, she's a giant proponent of sauna and also of cryotherapy. And she was talking about the benefits of cold shock proteins. And one of them is your body freaks out when you go into those cryotherapy chambers

because it's like 250 degrees below zero. So you get this big, powerful burst of norepinephrine. You get cold shock proteins, these cytokines, because your body's trying to react to the fact that you have this massive cold environment that you're just trapped in. It's like so fucking cold. Your body freaks out. And it produces this really radical anti-inflammation process.

And one of them is this stuff. Okay. That's what I was like. Wait, what? It's also known as noradrenaline. Oh, it's also known. Oh. Oh, because adrenaline is epinephrine. Okay.

So noradrenaline, it makes you feel so good. It's like one of the reasons why I really like going to the cryo chamber, just to get out. So you know how to feel. Yeah, you get out. You're like, whoa. So you're putting your body under stress, and then it releases that. Yeah. Yeah, Dr. Rhonda Patrick is also a big proponent of that in the sauna, and that's why I installed that sauna here.

But did you call it a protein? Yeah, heat shock proteins. Heat shock proteins and cold shock proteins. It's like proteins that are produced by your body to deal with the effects of extreme heat or cold. So your body reacts to stress. Like too much heat will kill you for sure. Too much cold will kill you for sure. But a little bit is actually very good for you because your body has a response to that.

And that response sort of invigorates your entire system kind of speaks to what we're talking about performing and uh feeling stressing yourself going through that stress in order to um yeah i listened to a chunk of that yoel and um joey diaz yeah which by the way was, the way you guys communicated. That was like a beautiful thing. It's pretty cool. But, yeah, the pyramid of... Athletics.

Yeah. And you're every day and you're living there. It just made me think about my own life, which, you know, my parents worked really hard to, like, make me comfortable. And here's your TV and you go to school and you come home from school. And here's your TV and you go to school and you come home from school and how that's the goal in like suburban life is to just be comfortable. We don't realize it, but this is all because people before us weren't. We're just only living in the environment where people are supposed to be comfortable. But, you know, just two generations back, everyone's an immigrant and everyone's really concerned about starving.

So I have to go back to the 1920s. Everyone's worried about fucking dying. There were millions of people died like even during world war ii millions of people died by starvation that was a real concern i remember you saying to him you're like yeah it produced it produces really good athletes it might not be like the nicest situation but there's no way you get really nice situations that produce the world's best combat sports athletes. It just doesn't happen. You have to be strong as fuck. Mentally, physically, you have to have experienced adversity on a level that most people can never comprehend. So that when the shit hits the fan, that you could look at the other guy on the other side of the cage like Yoel Romero does and goes, I'm going to go fuck you up. Because I've been through everything already. Even then, the other guy on the other side of the cage, like Yoel Romero does, and goes, I'm going to go fuck you up.

Because I've been through everything already. And even then, the other guy's the same way. So it doesn't even work. Yeah, I don't really relate to that. Like trying to fuck up the other dude and going through so much adversity. Well, my point of view is like, I'm going to do my chores,

and I'm so comfortable right now. Now I'm going to do my chores, and I'm so comfortable right now. Now I'm going to deliberately make myself uncomfortable in order to do what I know is good for me and that I enjoy doing and that I want to have success in. And that takes me to another place in my life. But it's, you know, I do it in a very small way, you know? You do, but it's still really honestly the same thing. What Yoel's doing and what you're doing is the same thing. You're doing something very difficult that you struggle to do it. It's hard.

You push yourself. But it's recognizing that you want to do it. Yes. And then through doing it, you get a little bit better at everything. Did he talk about, I only watched the first chunk of it. Did he talk about his desire to do that or not? Yeah. You know, like. Yeah. Yeah, he definitely how does that how does that match with kind of being put in that system i think you asked that early on too

was like how do they choose how do you choose is just someone who is what if you have the natural ability but you don't want to do it well then you won't perform and if you don't perform you get knocked out of the system so there is the desire along with it. There has to be. To be as good as he is, there has to be desire to compete. He wanted to be a boxer initially, he said, but his father was a boxer. I think his brother is a world champion boxer as well.

He's just a genetic freak. Like, there's genetics in Cuba, and he was explaining it to me too during the podcast. He was like, anybody that thinks that everyone's on steroids, just go to Cuba, where everybody's so poor, and look at the regular people. Just the regular people. Forget about the athletes. He said, I'll take you to Cuba for two weeks, and you'll come back.

You're like, I get it. I get it. There's just... Really? It was a slave colony. They had a hard life. I mean, they're Africans that speak Spanish, and they live on an island that's off the coast of Florida. I mean, it's a crazy that's their Africans that speak Spanish and they live on an island. That's off the coast of Florida I mean, it's a crazy spot

the whole thing's crazy and was run by a dictator forever and they had some of the best athletes in the world in boxing in judo in wrestling just world-class athletes that had mental toughness the likes of I mean it's hard for the average person even comprehend what those people are capable of. And a lot of it is because of that really brutal system that you all talked about on the podcast. Amazing stuff. Yeah. Amazing.

Just imagining that this guy went through that. It's fascinating because that's not what I want to do. It's not what you want to do. Right. But you just think like that. There's a person out there that can do that. And look what happens on the other end. You get that guy.

Like, oh, Jesus. You just be in the room with him. It's just, he's like a fucking superhero. It's like, Jesus. That is the product of genetics, ruthless training, ruthless environment. You know, one of the most complex and sophisticated sports training systems in the world. With boxing and with wrestling and with judo. I mean're just phenomenal over there it's cool it's really inspiring in a different way for someone like me like i don't relate necessarily to what he does is like foreign

and amazing but through my own life it's like oh i can be not comfortable. And that's why it seems like a contradiction, but it's not. That's what we're supposed to be doing. And when you get through that, you have a sense of satisfaction. And then your comfort feels better. It wasn't something that was introduced to me or taught to me, really. I mean, I did sports a little bit. Did you figure it out just through the pursuit? Yeah, I don't there was nothing that I really committed to that much or knew how to or if I did it was maybe one small aspect it wasn't really a

Thing it was you know, the messaging was try to get by try to try to get some shitty job you know it wasn't um it's weird because you know it's not not like woe is me but like just knowing that even that you had choices that you could try to be something great right that wasn't really something that was discussed or on the table well wasn't that isn't that that's one aspect of alt comedy like they're not a lot of people that talk about success or the process of it's more of like playing everything low-key right or like a sarcasm yes or a yeah it's not like that's the yes, yes, of being a hipster, is that you've got that distance.

You're not really... That's why I love the Comedy Store as well, because it's like... The opposite. It's the opposite. It's like, what's your thing? Yeah. And everyone's super honest and open

about, like, bombings and good sets and bad sets and jokes that just fell right in their face. Like, that back bar area is so brutal where the people just come back there and go, oh, I just ate a fat plate of shit. Like, people are just so honest about it when they come downstairs, you know? It's a great place.

I feel super fortunate, you know? Yeah. I missed it so much, coming back. I mean, there's a place for that sarcasm in the... Sure. Tom Segura does that all the time, he's also sincere as well yeah there's a there's a thing that's a it's an insecurity it's like a defense mechanism and that's what a lot of people do it for they pretend they're above it all but no one's above

it all man you can't don't pretend you're above all it's ridiculous you do it for fun but pretending you're actually above it all you're missing out like nobody believes you first of all it's like pretending you're above it all. It's ridiculous. You can do it for fun, but pretending you're actually above it all, you're missing out. Like, nobody believes you, first of all. It's like pretending you're psychic or you know magic. Nobody fucking believes you. All right, so you keep that act going. Keep your fucking fake mustache on and your cape and your top hat. I feel that's silly.

Like, doing it occasionally every now and then is fun. We all do it to each other all the time. It's doing it occasionally every now and then. It's fun. We all do it to each other all the time. But if you have a complete lack of ability to communicate sincerely, that's not being hip or cool. That's a defense mechanism. And it's a stupid one because you don't have much time.

You have 100 years if you're lucky. They go by like that. If you have $100, you spend $1 a day before you know it, you're fucking broke. That's life. My son was like, how old was Michael Jackson when he died? I was like, ah, in his 50s. He was like, oh, okay. Like that sounded right to him.

I'm like, people don't die until much later. Basically, that's me. Well, Michael Jackson's the craziest case of all time, right? Because they were administering anesthesia every night so he could go to sleep. Dude. Dude. I was playing that. I was playing I Want to Be Starting Something and Thriller in the car on the way, taking my son to school, and I start crying just because it's like, how do you explain what he was and how monumental what he did was.

Like I can remember seeing him dancing to Billie Jean and like how kind of like broke the mold for music and the persona that he had and that level of creativity. Yeah, it was weird. And then to be in the car with this, with my kid who doesn't really knows the name, but didn't, you know. Right. It's just, that's not part of his life.

Maybe you should introduce him to that movie, that documentary. What was that one documentary they did? This Is It? Yeah. Oh, yeah. That's right. Yeah. Does that get into the drugs and stuff?

And how many years was he doing that for so sad not very long but here's one of the more fucked up things this is something i speculated a long time ago his doctor who went to jail for giving him the anesthesia also testified that michael jackson was chemically castrated by his parents when he was young to preserve his voice that's what i suspected i suspected i talked about on the podcast like years ago, I was saying this, I think he was a castrata, which is they take young boys and they used to do this with opera and they would castrate them at a very young age. And because of that, their body never developed testosterone. So they would develop this high piercing, like

haunting voice. It's very strange. Like we played some of the, there's only a few recordings of actual castratos that are available or castratos. One of those. But when you play them, they're haunting. Because you realize like this is a kid that was castrated as a baby so that he could be a singer. Like this is fucked up. And that's what Michael Jackson's doctor said

they did to Michael. They did it through chemicals. They chemically castrated him. The doctor said they did to Michael they did it through chemicals they chemically castrated him the same way his argument I'm just trying to regulate a situation that was already far gone is that his defense no I mean there's no defense the doctors just fucking you know he's just he killed him I mean killed Michael Jackson let him get anesthesia until he died his defense wasn't that he was just saying there's something else right like michael jackson was up like his parents literally chemically castrated him to preserve his voice because he was the lead singer

of the jackson five when he was a baby and that was part of what was great about him was like oh baby give me one more chance like that voice voice. You got a nice falsetto there. Thank you. That voice was nothing like anything that he would be capable of doing as an adult if he grew into a man. He would have this big old man, I want to get some pussy voice. And people would be like, no. I'm sorry. Where's little Michael? He would have like a, you know, like a Barry White voice or something. Like, fuck, you can't have that.

Like, you're Michael. You know, you're abc it's the easiest one well he may not have gotten that deep with his voice but i guess if you that's to believe be believed that he'd never had the chance i believe it you know why i believe it because his voice didn't sound anything like a regular man's and it didn't sound anything like his brothers his brothers all look like regular grown-ass men Michael Jopson's deep voice that's not deep that's got cold that sounds like John Rivers I was looking it up all those places I'm seeing that story about

him being castrated or like tabloid eats, the sun and that kind of stuff. Right. But it was, wasn't it an interview in like, uh, the, which it was a UK paper. Yeah, no, I just Googled. It was the sun, which is like not the best. That's not the worst, right? The Daily Mail is the worst. Both of them actually.

Are they the same? The equal? Yeah, I would think so. See, I'm hoping that's so true. And the last time you talked about this, got some messages i don't know again i was getting videos like this of showing like examples of his deep talking voices see that's not deep there's a lot of chicks that have way deeper voices yeah listen that's his deep voice come on let me tell you motherfucker you listen to the wrong people.

Yeah, well. I mean, think of how many women have ruthlessly deep voices. Yeah. Right? I could tell you a couple right now, yeah. I think. I think they did it to him. His voice was just phenomenal.

Like, human nature. Like, as an adult. That is such a fucking phenomenal song. It doesn't sound like anything that a regular man is capable of singing. Like the notes that he hits, like that voice that he had was just haunting. Right. I'm trying to think of who else is a natural star who has a high voice.

Well, Prince used to sing in falsetto, but it was very obvious when he was doing it that he was doing it. Yes. Whereas Michael Jackson, like that human Nature song was one of my favorites because it's such a slow, smooth holding of those sounds. These are natural sounds that are coming from him. It's like this natural, warm, affectionate tone to it.

It just doesn't seem like a man's voice. It doesn't seem like a woman's voice either. That seem like a woman's voice either that's my boy you got the right way of talking that's different that's like falsetto dancing you're saying that's like a force like a caricature yeah you could say that dancing that way what is this you feel like dancing puber phonia known as mutational falsetto or functional it's a type of voice disorder characterized by habitual use of high-pitched voice after puberty oh so that some people get that yeah it's like a psychogenic in nature and the other thing is you look at his body he had no muscle like his body was like i mean he was a very active guy dancing all the time

But he wasn't building a dancer. He was built like a stick. You know it was a very very thin guy That's what you would expect from someone who didn't have any testosterone. You wouldn't be able to develop any muscle I'm sticking with my theory. I might have biases but They're mine. They're mine. Okay. I'm sticking with it Dig him up. Make me feel like dig. Dig them up and check the nuts. Dig them up. So, Mary Lynn. Yes.

Is there anything you'd like to talk about? Anything that's important to you in this day and age? Jeez. You can't just turn it over to me. I'm just trying to figure out where you stand on things. Um. What? What?

Uh. What? What? What? What? Um. Told you I? What? Um. Told you I cried to Michael Jackson. Yeah.

Good reason. Uh. I. Think I'm a hypocrite. In what way? The gun control. Uh. March that is happening.

Mm-hmm. Uh. Part of me was like. I had a friend. march that is happening. Part of me was like, I had a friend, a mom, who said, the march is going on right outside our house. Like, who wants to join? And as soon as I clicked on the email

and saw what it was, in the pit of my stomach, I was like, no. No. And then I covered it up with i should do that this would be a really good thing to do and i was then fighting with myself because i was like well you can't have both things at once either you want to march and do that or you don't. Like those are conflicting things.

What was the no? I don't want to do it. I don't think it'll help. But then there's another part of me that really likes when people march because I do think it changes the attitude. Like I'm really happy that the women's march happened and is happening, but I didn't go. And I feel like it's like a dirty secret. And I've started,

I have a bit about it. That's sort of an unformed bit where I say, yeah, I live in Encino because that's where you go to give up. Like next, next time you see me, I'm going to be like, I live in thousand Oaks. I'm allergic to the sun. And I described like the moment I knew I had given up was, and this is just an exploratory, I still don't have it figured out. The moment I knew I had given up was I was making my stay away from my vagina poster with glitter. And then I marched out to the curb and was like, it's too hot.

I don't think they'll be parking at the march. And went back inside. Did you really? Yeah. I mean, that's the joke version. But I was very conflicted and like, oh, I should go. And both times I was doing stuff with my kid and it was, you know, a very small mundane day. And I was like, I'm not doing it.

And then I saw the women that did it and they talked about being in this crowd and how uplifting it was. And I was like, that's amazing. Like, I'm really happy this is happening. really happy this is happening. But yet, why is it because I don't care and I'm weak? Or is it because there's a part of me that believes I don't want to do it and that it's an actual belief? And then I was like, you're a hypocrite. And then I was like, I'm tired.

Can't think about it anymore. But yeah, I don't know. I think all those people. I'm a hypocrite is what I'm saying. I don't know if you're a hypocrite. You just have, you decide. You just decide what you want to do and what you don't want to do. You know, and you didn't want to go march that day.

It doesn't mean you're a hypocrite. It means you just didn't want to do it. You're a hypocrite if you were saying one thing and voting for another. That would make you a hypocrite. That just makes you a person who just decided that's not what you wanted to do. And also, look, it would be nice if you threw your one

into the 600,000 that were marching through the streets of downtown LA, but there's still 600,000 people. Even if you're just watching it from the news and go, you go girl, it's not, you're not helping. You're not helping,

but I don't think you're a hypocrite. It doesn't make you a hypocrite. Does it help? Do you think those big marches? That's what I'm wondering. I think it empowers people. It gets people very excited about the cause. There's a lot of other people that think like-minded,

gets people to watch, gets people to put it on the news. People at home watch it. Maybe people feel like, hey, even though some fucked up things have gone down with Harvey Weinstein and all this other shit, at least it's turning around. Maybe people are bummed out that this guy became the president, but now people are active. Maybe people are paying attention more. Maybe people are more engaged. Absolutely.

So ultimately, it's almost like what we were talking about before. You get past that adversity, and there's actually a benefit to it. And sometimes I think even as a country, we might need that. Because we don't have any war over here. Everything is over there. We don't see it in terms of like right in front of us on a daily basis. But this is like a cultural war and an idea war. And so I think that these things happening right in front of us and having

These uncomfortable moments forces these conversations There's just gonna be peaks and valleys in the conversation where people are rude and people are calm and maybe there's gonna be some breakthroughs But ultimately at least so you're people for a pro-artist. I'm well I'm pro progress and I think that all of this comes from people being dissatisfied with how things are currently so the best way to me is very it's very very inspiring to me that you know those kids came out and are talking and that's like i love that but it's also about guns yes but it's also sad that so so so little is happening yeah there's this it is sad but there's two things that have to be addressed guns have to be addressed for sure but also mental health has to be addressed

we have to address psych medicines we have to address how many of these people whether it's correlation equals causation or not how many of these fucking people have been on psych medicine and the answer is almost all of them. Now, does that mean that they're mentally ill and so that's why they shoot people or that doing these psych meds, a lot of people call the effects of these things very disassociative, that they allow people to do horrific things they might not have been able to do before or inspire them to do that? There's a real argument there. It's not exonerating the people that have done these horrific things or exonerating the people that got the guns in their hands. It's

not doing that, but it is a factor. There's a factor that people aren't taking into consideration because it becomes a one or the other thing. It becomes an either we need more gun control and we need stricter gun control or we need to do something about the effects of psych medication. gun control or we need to do something about the effects of psych medication it's not both and I think it's both I really say well yeah based on how you just presented it it definitely seems like both and it there was an article there was room starting to review but there's an article that was written we I got to remember this that was written recently that was really ridiculous and it was saying contrary to popular belief most of these mass shooters are not

mentally ill well what the fuck defines mentally ill if they're on psych medication they're all on anti-psychotics and psychiatric meds and ssris they're almost all so if they're not mentally ill i thought you're gonna say like how are you how are you shooting people and that in itself that was the next mentally ill yeah if you can just go into a school and shoot 19 children you have to be mentally ill but the point is if they're not mentally ill why are they taking medicine for people who are mentally ill there's a bullshit article and it's an article who knows what the fucking whether it's a contrarian point of view that's designed to get clickbait hits or whether it's someone who's trying to set up a narrative that's contrary to what the

pharmaceutical drugs companies have known for years there's real effects to those things again and they're not always positive and it's a goddamn crapshoot whether or not a pill is going to work for you or not work for you i mean that's why they have abilify abilify is an anti-psychotic they prescribe to people who are on they're on ssris but they think about killing themselves they're like look if you're thinking about killing yourself try this first try to stack these two together maybe that's your mixture and right wasn't it the most number one most prescribed drug in the country see if that's true still a bill of an anti-psychotic was the number one most prescribed drug in the country look Look, we've got a fucking problem.

Now, how many of these people are taking medication because they really need it? I'm sure some of them. How many people are taking medication because drug companies are pushing this shit? Abilify is top-selling U.S. drug. There you go. That's fucking crazy. The top-selling U.S. drug. See this.

Don't blame mental illness. Blame men. Well, that's true, too. No, she's right there too. Like I have a bit that I'm doing about all the different fucked up things that men do. Like it's an anti-men's rights bit. And it's like that, I don't want to do it on the air because I'll fuck it up before my special. But it's that we have to pay attention to like all the shit that we do wrong.

Like men, like when we look like mass shootings is not just, if you want to take credit for the good things that men have done, you have to take credit for all the war. Like that's also what they've done. Men have caused all of it. You know, and in the bit, I go into detail about all these different things. It's a buildup to something else. But this also has to be addressed, that it's always men. That's real too. It's not blaming every man that didn't shoot up a school.

We have to figure out what the fuck is it? What is it, what combination of psych drugs, guns, and being a man is causing this? And if we just want to blame only the tools, that seems to me to be fucking crazy. They also want to blame the NRA. Well, I see in one point because you think the NRA is helping people get drug or get guns rather more easily. I get that. But also, no one who is a member of the NRA has ever committed a mass shooting. So you have to think of that. Well, well, what does that mean? I mean, are you really blaming the group of people that wants gun safety to be paramount and the group of people

that doesn't want their rights to be infringed? Or are you going to attack the group of people that are actually shooting these people? The real problem is the people that have actually done it. And I guarantee you, there's something wrong with every single fucking one of their brains. I'm looking for that bed right about now. Sorry. No, no, no, because everything you're saying, I'm just thinking that the person that shoots a bunch of people, whether they're on psych drugs, whether they have access to a gun, mental health issues, they're isolated to the point where they can do something like that. little statement that someone is isolated is something that we can't address because it's so complicated and it's such the fabric of how we live our lives it's so much easier to like blame

and fight for all these things but how do we fix you know the one guy who's the his brother was just found with all that porn it's like yeah the guy that shot all the people in vegas yeah how do we address just how fucked up people are in general or the horrible story about i'm jumping topics but the horrible story about that i can't even talk about it the couple that had all those kids that they oh yeah they kept locked up in their basement nobody knew nobody said anything people yeah i thought they seemed weird like how do we address our disconnection from each other that we that we're so fucked up there's definitely gonna be people that feel alienated and they always want to,

they see these people having a good time around them and they want to just flip over the game. They want to say, fuck you and burn the whole thing to the ground. There's always going to be people like that. There's a lot of that. What do you mean? They see people having a good time around. They see people that are happy,

that are enjoying life. Like, especially if this kid felt alienated in school and bullied and cast out and targeted. And then he gets free and he sees these people that are having fun. He just wants to go back and just punish everyone. This is a very common theme. People feel real pain.

How do we change that theme? How do we help people who are in pain? You're going to have to do a lot of things, right? Because think of the people that had their children locked up. Who are these monsters and how did they have a kid? How is it so hard to get a car license and it's easy as fuck to have a kid and raise another member of our culture, of our society, our community?

How is that possible? You've introduced a poison and toxic member to our community because you did a terrible job of raising them. And one of the oldest ones went to college and and then they would i can't remember i think it was a dude would come out and the mom would be waiting for him and like so the oldest one was out in the world and still no one could help like whatever mind melds they had on this one was out and he didn't say that his younger brothers and sisters were locked up? I guess. Oh, God.

He should be in jail. Yeah, I don't know the whole, the details of that. I mean, it's not, I guess it's not his fault. He's probably like beyond fucked in the head. Yeah. But just the fact that he could keep that a secret, it's like, what? It's horrific. keep that a secret it's like what it's horrific but and you and you just think about i mean how many people are fucked by the time they have children like it's not even that they're doing

a bad job of it they're incapable of doing a good job of it they're too fucked up they're too fucked up from their own upbringing but they still get horny i mean that's just that's just what happens in this world. People like to have sex. They have sex. Boom, there's a person. Got to raise it, but I'm fucked up and I love meth. What do you do?

Fucking men. Am I right? Yeah, it's fucking men. It's everybody. It's definitely men, though. And that's my issue with all this masculine bullshit is a lot of these guys that are proclaiming masculinity are really bitches. And that real men wouldn't be doing this stuff in the first place. You would look past most of this stuff in the first place. You know, there's a lot of people in this world that don't have personal sovereignty whether it's men or

women and they're not they're not raised correctly and then they didn't go on a beneficial path through life that left them in the current state where they're they're a helpful member of our community see this is the show about family values yeah that's what you're really about it is about community values like friendship you know like what we're talking about the comedy store friendships giant it's very important and some people don't have any fucking friends and that's a dark place to be bullied your whole life don't have any friends you're on medication you're all fucked up and you're one of those guys out there that just wants to go out with a bang you know just want to walk into a mall with a fucking

shotgun and go out with a bang there's a lot of people that think like that. They just don't have the courage to do it I mean even going back to that one night that we when I said, I don't know if I can do it I mean, it's a smaller example, but but still Valid, you know and you just looked at me and said you can you're good like you're doing it or you know whatever your response was those little moments of like Those are big a real connection yeah when you know someone really does care about you and someone really does like you and we're not you know talking every day it was just a moment of kindness and commonality and seeing that other person we fixed it everybody we fixed it we did it well i never had i never knew that

you didn't think well of me or or of me i did you know i never felt like i was just intimidated by you and i didn't i well i didn't know you but i just like your vibe to me was like uh-oh like he doesn't like me very much that's not but that wasn't because i'm talking years ago though this probably would have been 2000 whatever right when right but it was never anything where like i didn't like you i'm sure i probably was not even really on your radar or not even a thing of not liking or liking that i know we never really had any interactions. No, I just felt your power. I took it personally. I felt your power.

That's pretty silly. Well, we got through that too. Yeah, we did. So if you do a special, when do you think you'd be gearing up for that? Have you thought through it? Like you'd be ready in a year? Be ready in a month? Oh my gosh.

Too much? No. Where's the bed? Where's that bed? Where's that bed? Nappy nap nap. I have to figure out, because so many comics I know do it themselves. Yeah.

I think I could have the material I want fairly within the next six months, but then I need to figure out the how. The how. The how. There's a few companies that do that now. I need to make it first. Right? That's how you do it.

Yeah, definitely. Just make it. Yeah, that's not a bad move. Just making it first is not a bad move, because when you just make it first, not a bad move because when you just make it first then you can just sort of sell it somewhere and if it's good everybody's always looking for new comedy you know there's we were just talking earlier about amazon scared a little bit scared because i i teed up for it when i first went on the road and had had an hour and then um

my manager at the time i think tried to sell it on a high level. This was before Netflix is what it is now. It was a few years back when they were first started doing ours, I think. And they were like, no. And then she, you know, all the top tier people were like, no, like no one knows her as a comic. Like we're not buying it. And then she was like, let me sell it at the second tier. And they were like, no.

And this whole time I was like, I should have just done it myself. But I think I've been lucky enough to get a lot of acting jobs. So whenever I'm like being my self-starter and then a carrot comes along, I'm like, I'll do that acting job. That'll work. So I've never had to sort of grind it out in that way and that's why it scares me so then that when it didn't sell at that time i just went oh i should have done that myself and now i'm tired of this material and then you know time passes i'm like

maybe it's for the best because you know once i do that then i'm really out there as that it might be a commitment issue on my part. I know that feeling. I know what you mean. It's just hard. It's hard to just fucking dig your heels in and decide to do something that's tough like that. And then also the financial investment. If you decide to do it yourself,

you've got to spend a lot of money and hire a crew and make sure the director doesn't fuck it up and make sure it all comes out well. You know? Who do I know that did one and they fucked up the shooting of it and he had to wind up putting it online? Was it Rory Albanese?

Did he say that he did one that someone fucked up and he wound up putting it online? I think Rory hasn't released his yet. He was thinking about doing it soon. Some of it was him. Somebody else then. Kurt Metzger? Whatever.

Someone funny. Did you do yours yourself yourself I did one of them myself yeah I know I've done two of them two of them myself yeah um but the best was last year doing it with Netflix that was the best because they're just so easy they're just like go ahead they just let you do it yeah whatever you want they're like we like. They're just like, go ahead. They just let you do it? Yeah. Whatever you want. They're like, we like it. Yay. That's awesome. There was like zero feedback. You know? They just wanted to make sure it was an hour long.

Not too long. Not too short. I kind of want to do a 15 minute special because I have this thing that I've done for years and I don't do it very often, but it's so dumb. It's like, hey guys, take a break. Hey ladies, fucking guys. Am I right? Ladies right ladies take a break what's up with these bitches but for like but for 15 minutes like what's up with

bitches and their scented candles they're always like smell this try these sheets uh guys take a break ladies guys give us a ring if you want to but like just have the whole thing be that that's funny I like it 15 minutes that's just something they're doing now right

that's what I heard yeah no I mean I would love to do an hour for sure but that's more of a commitment to things

and ideas you wanted to have some girth yeah well you could definitely do it but we were also talking about

how Amazon's doing specials now too they did Bob Saget special and they air they also talking about how Amazon's doing specials now, too. They did a Bob Saget special, and they bought a bunch of other people's specials. They bought Brian Cowan's special. They bought all those specials from CISO. All those specials are now on Amazon. Yeah.

A lot of places for you, Mary Lynn. Just do it is what you're saying? Just do it, for sure. Yeah, the only terrifying thing is once you do it, then you have to write new material. That's where it gets scary. Because then you're left without weapons. You start from scratch. And you've got to grind and dig

and claw your way back up to the top of the hill. Oh, oh, oh, oh. You've never done that before, huh? A special? Well, a special when you have to abandon all the material and start from scratch. No, as you were saying that, I was thinking, because I've done one-woman shows. But I'm still pulling from that show.

Because if it's stuff that I still like, I'll pull it up. I have stuff about my son being an infant, and he's nine years old. I'll talk about my C-section. If it's late at the comedy store i'm like let's get into it because i know they don't want to hear it i'm like let me let's talk about it it's 1 a.m let's talk about the c-section those 1 a.m sets those are strength training that's like running with weights on like a weight vest weights on your back and like ankle weights too i've learned to really love them it took me so long to just even leave the house.

I would be standing there at the comedy store like... I had to train myself to be like, this is part of it. You have to be awake. You have to want to be here. It was a weird psychological... Part of me is like, I just want to do my set. But then I'm resenting that I'm out of the house. Like, I'm some sort of princess or something.

How dare. It's like, no, you made this choice. But connecting the want with what it is. I don't know. I mean, I've talked to other people who are like, well, don't do midnight shows. But clearly, I wanted it. clearly i wanted it and i wanted it at the comedy store and once i got used to it i was like this is the best like i love doing those late spots not that i wouldn't mind an 8 p.m shot or a shot you want 8 45 shot in my slot every once in a while yeah nitro

yeah it makes you talk I'm only I didn't even get halfway through I'm taking it easy well then you're about 135 milligrams

caffeine in it's good it's not bad right it's really good like espresso do you drink that kind of stuff yes black coffee

yeah I'll go I go both ways strong I like a latte strong woman I like a latte too do you. I like a latte, too. Do you like a latte with vanilla sweetener and shit in it? No, no.

A bunch of sugar? No. No? No. No, like a straight up nonfat. I'll do it all. I'll drink a vanilla latte. I won't turn my nose at it.

I'll do a shot of espresso. Yeah, it's all yummy. Yeah. You're kind of on a path of self-improvement through comedy. Do you realize that? I like that. It seems like it, right? Yeah.

Like you seem like more empowered by this. I definitely am. Yeah, that's true, isn't it? It is. It is. It's helping me. He's saying it so reluctantly. So disappointed. It's saying so reluctantly. So disappointed.

Such a strange thing. Well, it's what it is. You're fighting your alt roots. So it is. You're fighting the smugness and the sarcasm. You're fighting it.

Fighting sincerity. Sincerity. Self-improvement. Oh gosh. Is that what I'm doing? Sure. I'm like, oh, if I could just get on a pilot, then I wouldn't have to work anymore. No commitment.

You just zone out. You're not even there. You know, like you do your best, but it's not even your writing. Whatever. So much easier. So much easier. If you're on a good sitcom. Oh, girl, you're dropping some logic

when i was on news radio when i tried to get on a pilot so bad yeah go on when it was smooth so easy to show up script good got a couple good lines remember them deliver them sit in the makeup chair what's wrong with that boom nothing text coming in someone's bringing you a drink doesn't feel as good it's not as good problem is you already killed mary lynn you've already crossed over into the dark lands when you kill like saturday night on the road and you're fucking crushing right when you put it all together and you remember those dark days and you first start doing it again and now you're killing yeah how good does that feel it feels great it's amazing but then i will it i'll chip away like how long will i let that feel

great you know maybe till the next morning and then i then it starts all over again then you gotta do it again yeah you have to that's that's the thing there's never a point where you're like, oh, I made it. Let me sit down. There's no... That place doesn't exist. Well... You always have the bed. Don't worry. You can always take those naps. It's always there.

You can always enjoy those naps. That pillow's always there. You got it now with all your shots? The cat can crawl in bed with you? No problem. I mean, I still have a lot of fear with it. Even last night, how was your stand-up on the spot? It was great.

I loved it so much. I spent the entire day going, why did I do this? I'm not clever enough. Like, I can't think of jokes. I'm like, just say the opposite. Just get angry. Go on a rant. Like, I'm coming up with all devices because I'm like, you won't write a joke on the spot.

You don't know how to write. Your brain doesn't work like that. Like, a crazy person. A nightmare. A living nightmare. I spent the day going, oh, really? Oh, you're going to just come up with jokes on the spot? Like, good luck with that.

The voice in my head, once I got there, it was delightful. I was like, oh, this is my real life. This isn't the life in my head. It was a delight. Yeah. I had to call my friend afterwards and go, I think I just experienced pleasure. I hate to say this, but that was pleasurable.

Well, that room in particular, that set, I hate to say this, but that was pleasurable. Well, that room in particular, that set, for people who don't know, Stand Up On The Spot is Jeremiah Watkins' show. He used to have a show called Thunder Pussy. Yeah, I guess I didn't explain it. Oh, really? Yeah, that was the same show, but they called it Thunder Pussy for some reason. Now, what you do is you go on stage, and people just have suggestions.

I make people put their hands up. I point to someone, and then they give you a suggestion and right away you just start talking about it. And I have some real potential leads for bits from last night, like two solid ones. What I do is I don't want to, but I do. When I get home, I'm fucking tired. I've had a long day, but I still sit in front of the computer and I play the recordings and I go back over the bed good have to that's good have to it's part of the

job have to clean your room it's like those things like gotta brush your teeth I don't want to go to sleep brush your fucking teeth gotta do it and so you know how many I'm sure this is fairly normal how many sets I have in my phone that I've never listened to. Yeah, that's fairly normal. Yeah. I listen to them all. You have to. Damn, that's good. The only time I don't listen to them all is when I'm on the road and I'm doing four sets. And then do you erase it after? No, I don't have anything.

You save it. Yeah, I'll show you. I got all these bitches in here. Look. And you've listened to all of them and they stay there. Yeah, look at them all. How do you know which one to go back to for stuff? I look for the date.

You don't really. Yeah, I mark them. I edit the name, see at the bottom. How do you know which one to go back to for stuff? I look for the date. You don't really. Yeah, I mark them. I edit the name, see at the bottom of the names. Oh, that's good. Yeah. But then you won't know,

how do you remember which bit in this one? You just kind of loosely? I just record it and I go over it with a notebook. But the thing with me is, the big thing is,

I know when something happened. Like if I do a set and I'm like, okay, I went like, okay, I went on a totally different chain of thought. Yes. And if this branch of the bit might be a new bit, I have to listen to that bit again.

Yes. And so I'll clearly go over there and make sure. So common sense, but it's so hard to do. It's discipline. Yeah, you're giving me the training right now of the stuff that's like, obviously, you remember when you went off on that thing, go back and listen to it and write it down. Think about the things that you've said today that have helped you, right?

Like how you've had to speak clearly, do all these things. And what did that come from? Well, that comes from trial and error and focus. Like you're focusing on your act because of that. That next level of focusing on your act is being like super diligent about recordings and writing. And that's what a lot of comics don't do. There's a lot of comics that think they're grinding and they'll say that I'm

out there. I'm doing a lot of sets. They're not writing any new material though. You can't, you have to write, you have to actually write. That's what I believe. Maybe,

maybe you can just write all on stage. it makes sense because you can trick yourself into thinking that you're grinding it out. And maybe you are doing a lot of sets and maybe even though you're doing the same set, you're doing it differently. So you can, and that's, it's, that's fine. That's its own thing, but you're not going to come up with new stuff from that. You're doing something, but are you doing like everything you could be doing? It's like, it's like anything else. The more time and enthusiasm you put on

something, the better you're going to get at it. If you're a guy, like say if you're a bowler and you only like to bowl 40 minutes a day, but you want to be the best in the world, you're not going to be, I don't care what you want. But the time and enthusiasm is that tricky part that goes back to like discipline. Well, also I was trying to make a bigger jump which is how do you connect to being enthusiastic if you don't well think about how you were bummed out about your set right and you got to the store and you had to trick your brain into being more present and more pumped up for your set right and then when you did it was a joy i guess i'm trying to connect it to what we were talking about earlier about people who get isolated and don't

have friends and don't have a feedback and don't have those like tendrils of like being able to make that leap so that it you know you start like eating yourself alive and well i think with everything it's like little steps. You never climb out of the barrel, right? Yeah. If you're 300 pounds, do not run a marathon, right? Right. Walk around the block.

And if you're a person who's been living your life with a bunch of fucking negative thinking in your head, take steps in the right direction, you know? Take a step, but then you have to acknowledge that step. Like, oh, something nice happened to me today. I need to remember that. Yeah, I need to remember it, and I need to build on that, you know, take a step, but then you have to acknowledge that step. Like, Oh, something nice happened to me today. I need to remember that. Yeah. I need to remember it. And I need to build on that, you know, and you can do that. Anybody can do that. You could just do it incrementally. I had a great podcast with this guy, David Goggins. Did you, um, you've heard of him? So, um, he's a Navy SEAL who was also a famous endurance athlete. Yes. Yes. I heard a

bit of that. And he was talking about how, you know, he was a fat loser who kept making excuses for himself and just like drinking chocolate milkshakes every day and working for an exterminator. And he was fat as fuck. And he just decided, I don't want to do this anymore. And he had these moments where he went running. He ran three quarters of a mile. Then he turned around and walked back home.

That was his first time running. Like it wasn't quick that he became this guy who runs 100 miles at a time. How many fucking 100 milers did he do in a year? Wasn't it crazy? He was doing them every week or every two weeks or something like that. A week or every two weeks. My favorite attitude. It was insane.

Because he played it for it. He showed us the website. And he was like, these are all the ones he did in a year. And it's like, what the fuck? Every week or two weeks, he was it for it. He showed us the website and he was like, these are all the ones he did in a year. And I was like, what the fuck? Like every week or two weeks he was running 100 miles like in the mountains and shit.

100. That's a 24 hour race. Yeah. And he was doing it every week. That's fucking insane. But this guy started out running three quarters of a mile and then he quit

and turned around and walked back home because he was fat and he was eating milkshakes every day. Like that's the same guy. He, with these little incremental steps and then just deciding this is who I am now. I'm a guy who does what I say I'm supposed to do and I'm fucking serious.

I'm going to change my life. Now he's shredded. The guy's a fucking animal. I mean, he's just a pure machine made out of motivation and discipline. You don't get more discipline than that guy now. But he wasn't at one point in time in his life. And by him expressing that on the podcast, this really inspirational podcast, I think it gives everybody hope because you like to think that,

oh, that guy who is really good at this thing or that guy who's really mentally tough or this girl who's super disciplined who just accomplishes thing after thing. She's always been like that. No, no, no. No, no, no. Nobody's always been like that. No one has. You start off fucking up.

You fail. You move up. You figure it out. You make some mistakes. You fall back. You get back up. You go, well, that's not me. I'm me now.

I realize don't do that anymore. Now, instead, don't quit after three quarters of a mile. Now we're going to drink water instead of drinking chocolate shakes. We're going to eat healthy food. And tomorrow we're going to do a whole fucking mile. Let's do it. And then you do that mile like, holy shit, I did it. Mark it down.

Write it down. Did a mile. And then maybe take a day off. And then maybe the next day try to do it again. And then build. With everything. With comedy. With fucking, I'm sure that's the case

with music with with everything and to recognize that that's your choice yeah if i think of myself there are some mornings where i'm like i'm gonna sit and have a latte and you know in other mornings where i'm gonna work out those are all my choices like maybe that one day you're gonna be that person that just kind of sits there and stares out the window um you know that would not be work towards my hundred miles that I'm trying to run. But it might be a day where you daydream and come up with an amazing idea. And I kind of loved that I spent the day leading up to that stand up on the spot. Actually, I thought we had our podcast was yesterday. I had to go back into my text and I kind of like, you know how you do when you like have something to do at one.

So like at 11, you're like, well, I can't completely go do something else. So I kind of just agonized. And then it was like 12 and I looked and I was like, oh, it's not even today. So now I'm like kind of like, you know, didn't do stuff I could have done for a couple hours. And now, you know, I thought we were podcasting. So now I have all that time. I didn't do stuff I could have done for a couple hours. And now I thought we were podcasting. So now I have all that time. So I'm just like, well, I have that stand up on the spot show tonight.

So I really was just. I love when you do you. You do your lips first. She's terrible. And you're looking down. Like, could I have worked out? Yeah. But no, I'm just this lady. Here she is.

Who's a pretty girl? Who's a pretty girl? Yeah, so I weirdly, but it was kind of a productive day because then when I got to the end and was so appreciative, it made me so aware of the nightmare of my own head that I was very I was very conscious of what I what I was doing yeah not that got me to that then when it was so easy it really was like waking up from a bad dream when you're like oh this is life it's not that being engaged and being present and going to do this thing. It was nothing like what I was beating myself up. Like, why are you doing that?

What is that? What is that? And also you've done so many shows, but I wasn't even acknowledging that history. I was just stewing in almost because I had the time and I just let that run rampant in my head, that voice of like, oh, really? You think you can construct a joke

good luck you know like what why right why did i just feed that monster yeah it's just a common strategy that people do to avoid accomplishing things right and. And you do it subconsciously to give yourself a little bit of a break because the pressure of like being disciplined and doing things, it's hard. It weighs on you. Right. So then that becomes an excuse to not.

We were talking before the podcast about yoga and I was saying how when I did that 15 days in a month thing, I decided to end it with nine days in a row. So I just did nine days. I ended like a week early. I finished like a week earlier, like five days early,

but I did nine fucking days of yoga in a row to end it. And I was like, this is crazy. I never would have thought not only that I could do it. I mean, I know I could physically do it. It's not impossible, but I didn't think that ever like follow through and do that. It just seems too extreme. And that was the Bikram, the hour I could physically do it. It's not impossible. But I didn't think that I'd ever, like, follow through and do that.

It just seems too extreme. And that was the Bikram? The hour and a half? Yeah. Which people are like, oh, I do it every day. I've did 60 days in a row. Yeah, but I do, like, eight other things. Right.

It's not easy to carve out an hour and a half of fucking sweating your dick off in this hot box. You mean you're doing your other workout? Oh, yeah. I'm still lifting weights. Oh, you're adding that in. Yeah, I'm still doing that, too. I'm not just doing yoga. And I'm also doing writing and the podcast and whatever UFC shit I have to do.

I made myself do it too. But in doing so, I realized like, oh, you just got to just do it. Like you just got to say you're going to do it and just do it. Like I did a thing a while back in like 2009, but when I was writing, um, I was getting ready to do my comedy central special at the time, or it was on spike TV, then on comedy central. I, um, I wrote every day for a month in my, in my blog. I just decided I'm going to, and I committed to it online. I said, I'm going to write every day for a month. And in doing that, I'm i could do that like you just gotta do let's it has to be just a thing you do like oh i brush my teeth

oh i comb my hair oh i write oh i get up and i run an aisle i i get up and i lift weights for an hour whatever the fuck it is did your did that yoga tip you one way or the other like make you more thirsty or more like tired or more in the day yeah it definitely makes you thirsty you fucking sweat so much like you almost i i feel like i couldn't drink coffee i just was like i need oranges and water and lemons and oranges and water but you sweat so much but does that did that affect your other workout that you do like was your was your body just like, stop. No. Drink a bunch of water. No, I mean, it's easier because if I was going to do the yoga, I would just do stuff like lifting weights or something that night.

And lifting weights is... As opposed to running? Yeah, sometimes I'd run. I'd like to run, though, in the morning and do yoga later. Like, maybe I'll run at 8 and then do yoga at 10.30. I've done that. Because it's not a cardio thing really you know yoga and also like i like doing yoga when my legs are burnt out because then like i get more flexibility out of them i feel like your tissues get really beat up and then they become more pliable if you just force past that little pain barrier you know i really like lifting weights and then going to yoga is amazing.

If you do like squats and stuff like that, because your legs get like super warmed up and it just feels like they're exhausted and you just kind of pull that tissue apart easier. Yes. Yes. Hashtag yes. Hashtag fuck yeah. All right, Marilyn, should we wrap this up? Yeah. I'm glad we did yes. Hashtag fuck yeah. All right, Mary Lynn. Should we wrap this up?

Yeah. I'm glad we did it. Me too. Shall we do it again? We should do this again. I'd love to, yeah. I would love to have you on. Have you thought about doing one of your own?

Oh my gosh, I'm going to leave here today going, I got a podcast, I got a special, and I'm doing yoga twice a day. You should do a podcast for sure. You could do it. I would like to. Let's talk about it the second time you come back. Okay. Okay. Thanks. Goodbye. You could do it. I would like to. Let's talk about the second time you come back. Okay. Okay.

Thanks. Goodbye. Goodbye. Ladies and gentlemen, goodbye. Goodbye. Bye. I gotta, um...