The Joe Rogan Experience - #117 - Eddie Bravo

Episode Date: June 28, 2011

Joe sits down with Eddie Bravo.

You were gentle with the sound today too. Are there people that are on the fence about the fleshlight but that 15%? I was like, you know, when I heard the 15% I just jumped on it. Maybe. Maybe there's a few frugal master builders out there. I ignore 15% fucking off. That never makes a difference. Even when I was a broke ass motherfucker, 15% off never meant shit.

Really? Not 15. It ain't gonna make me get up out of my fucking chair and call somebody and order some shit. Oh, it made me. 30 pence? I'm a member of all the coupon websites. And if I had a flashlight web 15% off, fuck yeah, I'm like free shipping. That to me is like, oh, I got extra free something.

Whoa. Okay. I think everybody thinks differently when it comes to money. I think you're a lot like me in that you would rather not think about it at all. I don't want to think about that at all. You think about it as much as you have to. If it's 50% off, I'm like, well, how much is it? Would you consider yourself, be honest, it's totally cool,

would you consider yourself a really big tipper? Yes. Oh, really? Yeah. Like 20%? Usually guys that are into coupons. I don't know that many guys into coupons, but usually guys that are into coupons usually generally don't tip.

Well, I consider more of like that's human and, you know, like I'm helping somebody out compared to like, fuck, if I can get $20 off Amazon, I'm going to do that. Fuck Amazon in the ass. Yeah. Or, you know, Amazon's actually hooking you up and giving you a way to make. What is the reason for coupons? I mean, is it just to see what happens when they offer people less money for things? Well, I don't know. The grocery stores have changed. They used to be relying on coupons i mean is it just to see what happens when when they offer people less money for things well i don't know the grocery stores have changed they used to be relying on coupons now if you don't if you go to a grocery store without one of those cards you're pretty much paying a good

15 20 percent more than you would if you didn't have a card on you what's so what's the benefit in that for them because for uh for those people that aren't uh loyal they just come in and just spend money and i can charge them more. I think coupons and advertising, when you put up a billboard and it said, call now 15%, it doesn't mean shit to them. It's just a reason to have an ad. They don't have a storyline for an ad. So let's just say 15% off. We'll blow that up.

It doesn't really matter. It's a reason to get the logo out. That makes sense that it's sort of like an advertising move. But I've always thought it was probably to see, maybe our shit's too expensive. Maybe we could actually make more money if we sold more of them at a lesser price. Well, it probably also averages out.

If you have a product that's $20, but you could also charge $30 for it, then the averages out the people that use the coupons would probably make it more like $25. Probably there's some economics major right now pulling his fucking hair out right now. You don't know what you're talking about. I know. Total morons.

By the way, did we say this is Eddie Bravo? Dude, we just opened the show with coupons. Yeah. Holy fuck. Damn it. It's a new day. Ari's not even here. Damn.

Yeah, I've never been one to – whenever I go to Ralph's or something like that, and they always say, you know, Ralph's is our local supermarket. Do you want to have a Ralph's card? I'm like, no, I don't want another fucking card. I don't want another card. If I have a free shake on a Robex card or something, I'll just throw that away. I'm just so not good with coupons.

You guys need to start keeping all that stuff in a little bag. You've got to worry about it that stuff in a little bag you gotta like worry about it it's a different mindset Eddie and I have this it's a modified stoner mindset we get a lot of shit done but you and I are both the same way in that if we don't have to think about something

I'm not gonna think about it and if it's not gonna make a difference in my life I don't give a fuck if I'm not gonna feel it I'm not gonna physically feel the difference I need to do that the difference? No. Come on. I need to do that, I guess, in certain. It's good, man.

It helps you. You need to save money. Oh, yeah. I need to make sure. Well, how about if you just didn't smoke fucking cigarettes, cancer boy? Yeah. Just throw those fucking things away. You'd have a lot of extra money.

Yeah. That's a terrible fucking drug, man. You know, that is the number one thing. When anyone ever talks anything about politicians caring, I just say, why the fuck don't they ever talk about cigarettes? When was the last time you heard Obama talk about everyone should quit smoking? Getting on TV, talking about the 400,000 people. Sure, but doesn't he try to quit?

Or hasn't he tried to quit? Yeah, everyone has. You know what? I'll be honest. Every now and then I have a cigarette. I don't have a problem with cigarettes being legal. Yeah, every now and then. You a cigarette. I don't have a problem with cigarettes being legal. Yeah, it's a, you know, every now and then. You know what it does when you get high and you throw a cigarette on top of that after?

You've been having those menthol cigarettes. For five minutes you get like a big head buzz. That's pretty fucking cool. You've been having those menthol cigarettes, I can tell. I really like cigars. And cigars are, you know, essentially it's just pure nicotine that you're smoking, you know. So it's probably the same buzz that you get off of a cigarette in one way or another. I don't recommend it, but I have full control of my body.

I've been drinking since I was 14, probably younger than that. And I never drink alone. I'm not an alcoholic. I only drink in social situations. And if I don't drink for four or five months, I'm not an alcoholic. But you rage hard in social situations. if i don't drink for four or five months you know i'm not an alcoholic you rage hard in social situations oh yeah i wrote a blog about you dude i'm a temporary drunk yeah well you what you have is um you you have the ability to control your impulses and even though your impulses might be crazy you know you have ability to put them in check whereas a lot of

people when they start drinking and black out and become another person, those people, they can't just not do it again the next day. The next day comes around, they have a couple drinks, and they can't step aside. You can stop at two drinks. How about the pizza story in Phoenix, remember? Oh, yeah, man.

We were out, okay? We were hammered. 2005, I did the improv in Phoenix, in Tempe, rather. We had a great old time. Went out, got our party on, got our drink on. We were hammered, and we were at a pizza place, and it's 2 o'clock in the fucking morning, and Eddie Bravo was on the Atkins diet,

but he's blackout drunk, blackout drunk, and he still won't eat his crusts. Oh, yeah, that's right. Greasy Tony's. Yeah, Greasy Tony's. God rest his soul, Greasy Tony. Greasy tony passed away last year i was fucking committed to that shit i also remember your cheat day was ridiculous though you have a sundae with pizza inside of it chocolate sauce anything you can think of you're just dudes are famous for the cheat days there's

a dude who trains with bj penn i apologize i forgot his name he's a wrestler and he would put pictures of his shit online because it was so ridiculous. He would go to McDonald's and get a quarter pounder. And then he would go to Krispy Kreme and he would cut a donut in half. And he put the cheeseburger in between the donut. Oh, man. He was just fucking up some food. That cheap.

When you're on the Atkins diet and you're restricting carbs, you think about bread like every day. Sometimes you dream about bread and you're thinking about that Sunday. And you're thinking about food so much. Wednesday think about bread like every day. Sometimes you dream about bread and you're thinking about that Sunday and you're thinking about food so much. Wednesday, I'm like, damn,

all that matters to me is just a couple more days. Hold on. And I did it for almost three years where I was looking forward to that Sunday. Oh, man.

And when I would wake up and stuff my face and I'm like, it's 11 o'clock in the morning. I'm stuffed and it's my cheat day I've been waiting for this all week I want to get hungry again I start smoking a lot of pot getting

the cushiest of cushions you ever throw up I'm sure I did wow I mean you had to have some of the shit I saw you eat was just ridiculous I even on my fattest day never ate and then I would extend it to Saturday night I go I'm gonna start early and then for like after a year i started saturday night and all day sunday that's right you did yes you waited till midnight and then i just and then i did that for about a year i would start saturday night and midnight and just go off right and take it all the way through sunday then it started saturday afternoon around six ufc know, we're eating before the UFC. Okay. Then it just became, let's just do Saturday and Sunday and let's not think about it no more.

Let's just wake up Saturday, fuck it. And then when I added Friday night, that's when it started. I was like, enough's enough. It was opposite cheat day. I was like, I'm not going to get crazy with it. Now I'm not going to suffer. And I'm like, it's not even making a difference now. Yeah, you were doing that for a long time.

I miss those days. That was fun. But you were so insane with it. I was a machine. Very disciplined. Yeah, you would just eat lettuce. I remember you were eating bunny food. You were just eating chopped lettuce.

For a long time. Yeah. People thought, I lost so much weight. People thought, I remember at Abu Dhabi 2005, like people on the internet were saying that man is he a heroin addict because Henzo said something Henzo said something like

on the internet where they thought I was on like drugs were you growing your hair out then no you hadn't done that yet no no

it was spiking the way it is now and I was really skinny and it was from the Atkins diet and people at Abu Dhabi thought I was on heroin that's a true story people were on the underground talking shit And I was really skinny, and it was from the Atkins diet, and people at Abu Dhabi thought I was on heroin. That's a true story.

People were on the underground talking shit. Oh, he's on heroin. He looks like shit. The crazy thing is how much you train. You train a lot, but you would eat so bad that you would gain weight. You would just go off burritos, and you would just go off. Yeah. So now I'm on a diet part of the day. Part of the day?

How much of the day? A good 65, 70%. Well, as long as you just maintain, you know, it's when you let yourself go and then you got to get fucking skinny again. That's what happens with dudes. It would happen with girls. It happens with everybody. That's the hardest thing is getting back in shape.

You know, it's not staying in shape. Staying in shape is not that bad. You get some momentum, you keep it going. The one thing that's helped me a lot though is my girlfriend cooks for me all the time now. She moved in, so I rarely go out.

Before, man, in the middle of Hollywood, I had choices. That was all night. You want Carl's Jr.? You want Jack in the Box? You can get Wendy's all night. There's so much Taco Bells right there.

You have so many choices in it. All I got to do is get in my car. And what, what, what got me fat was the place I lived at before you, it was terrible parking. You had to, sometimes you had to park four blocks down the street just to get a parking. So if I had a good parking, when I got home after jujitsu, I wouldn't, didn't want to lose that parking. It wasn't worth it. That Carl's Jr. was not worth losing my parking. But then once I got my own official parking, man, you could leave at any time. Just right there at three in the morning, ready to go. Yeah, that's right. Your place used to be brutal for parking.

Yeah. You did not miss that shit. How do people live like that? That sucks. That's terrible. My friend lives like that, and I'm thinking, what if he had to poop really bad, and you couldn't find a parking spot, and he like just shit your pants it's like what we were talking about with uh all the area around the improv everywhere you go on those side streets it's all residential only parking

and like you're literally not even allowed to park there they're just they're just saying sorry even though this is the street there's no room for regular people you have to live here to park your fucking car here because we fucked up and we put too many people in one spot. You can't park. That's ridiculous, man. That's the worst thing in the world about when you do sets in Hollywood. I used to park my car in the improv. I used to let the valets park it, but they let some fucking chick. She was drunk, man, and she fucked up my car. She was pulling it out of a spot and it was a really tight little area and she just turned her wheel and hit the gas and just jacked my fucking car and she didn't have no insurance. And I'm like, why am I letting these people park my car? They're obviously not looking after my shit. So I stopped doing that.

You know what that reminded me of? Back in like 2002 when you tore your knee and you couldn't drive your NSX and I had to drive it for you. Oh, yeah, you had to drive me. You were so mad at me. He doesn't know how to drive a stick. He was really mad at me. He wasn't really mad at you. Shit. He kept, like, putting it in neutral on the highway and then dropping it down.

It was an NSX that had a lot of horsepower, man. I wasn't used to it. I was driving caravans and shit up to that point. That's hilarious. And 1972 Ford Courier. Eddie was so funny, because've never been seen someone so like breaking down the effect the car has on girls his knee just tore he's sitting in his car i'm trying to help him and he's fucking he's got pain here and he's like fuck he's grinding my clutch he's

fucking my clutch up and his knee i'm taking him to like emergencies uh not surgery it was a we had to go to get an MRI. Yeah. The doctor gave me an MRI immediately. Were you screaming on the top of your lungs? Because when I fucked my knee up, I was just screaming in tears. This was a bad one. I've had a bunch of different knee injuries,

but the most painful one is ironically the one that healed the quickest. That's the meniscus one. Once they did the meniscus surgery, it was like six weeks later, I was on the mat again. But when I had my ACL torn, both times it's not that painful, not nearly as painful. The meniscus is what's really painful. The ACL just kind of snaps and it's fucked and it hurts a little bit. And then you can't move your legs wobbling. You're like, what the fuck? And then you go to a doctor and they go, you don't have a ligament anymore. You have to get an artificial ligament put in

place. And it takes six months before you totally heal up. But the pain is nothing. It's like, it's not that big a deal. The pain of the meniscus tear, I had what's called a bucket handle tear. And it's called a bucket handle because you know how a bucket handle can like flip up and it can like stop like in the center, in the center position. Well, that's what it's like. It's like the handle of a bucket, like literally peels up and gets locked in place. So the sliver of meniscus is locked. And it's tearing. And it's just excruciating fucking soft tissue pain. It's really painful. I don't know what this is called. Where the top bone and the bottom bone.

I twist my leg weird. And it hit each other. The thing in the middle. I guess the knee socket or something. Snapped out of place. And the top bone hit the bottom bone. And then snapped right back Didn't you say it's still fucked up?

It still wobbles on you? Yeah, it still feels like it's going to happen again all the time I'm so paranoid Because when that happened I was filming a home video And in the video you could just hear me scream Like Bloody Mary Bloody Mary?

Bloody Murder I'm thinking of a different thing. Get that video and post it. Yeah, you have that shit? It's one of those videos my dad has on some VHS tape somewhere. We need to fucking scour your dad's closets. We need to have a video for this story, son. I never finished the video, too.

So did you break a ligament? Do you know what you did? He said that, I mean, this was a long time ago, but he said, you know, he told me what happened and I had to wear like this cast thing for a long time, maybe like six months or something like that. Damn. Ever since then. Six months, huh? Yeah, it was a while. Wow.

Yeah, the body is so goddamn fragile. I was in, we were in Pittsburgh and we were watching dudes on motorcycles with no helmets. They don't have a helmet law there. Just watching them drive around like, God, you silly fuck. Like, your body's so fragile, you don't even know. If you knew what could happen to your head if you hit the ground,

would you be willing to roll those dice? Would you really be willing to just get on a bike with a bunch of people and trust them not to slam into you? Trust them not to smash your fucking head off the concrete. Really? You're going to just trust them? The problem with motorcycles is that the reason you get it is because you want chicks to see you on the motorcycle. On the helmet, they can't see you.

So that's why those Harley guys, they found a loophole. They just put a little cap on the fucking top. They want their face exposed, man. It always goes to that with you. It always goes to impressing chicks. We're in that NSX. We're driving around. I'm in fucking pain.

Eddie's driving and dropping it down fourth gear on the highway, and she doesn't know what the fuck he's doing, right? And while he's looking around, he's like, damn, chicks are looking at me, man. Girls are looking at me. They never look at me in my fucking Bronco. Dude, bitches are looking at me. Look at that bitch right there. She's looking at me, man.

She's looking at me right now. Explco. Dude, bitches are looking at me. Look at that bitch right there. She's looking at me, man. She's looking at me right now. Explore. Explore. I'm sorry. Dude, when we would drive your Barracuda, the big fish, your catfish. Sick fish. Sick fish. Yeah.

Old men wanted to suck your dick. They were like pulling up going, oh, everybody that was, you know, have you ever been in this car driving around? Oh, yeah. Everybody says Says holy shit Like 15 year old dudes That are rappers and shit Look over and

Trip out You know It's too ridiculous It's too much It sounds like a Tyrannosaurus Rex It sounded like machine guns When you rub it Yeah

How does it sound Do it I forget Boom You used to have that My friend just did a photo shoot With Kit From the original Knight Rider car From the 80's though A photo shoot With Kit from the original Knight Rider car

From the 80's though A photo shoot with Kit? Yeah and I was like thinking wow Some guy owns Kit and he rents it out I think it's an Asian businessman And he rents it out and I'm thinking wow They actually let Kit mix with porn That's weird to me

I guess they don't have control over Kit's image anymore Yeah isn't that weird though? I think after 25 years It's like public domain or something. I wonder if it is. Some things are, right? Aren't some movies public domain? Like books are public domain after a certain amount of time? Yeah, like Huck Finn.

Yeah, how many years is it? I think the only movies are the Kung Fu Theater. I think you can do anything you want with those movies. You can start your own TV station and just put nothing but Kung Fu through. And nobody would do shit. No one owns them. It costs, dude, it costs more

to just keep the license going than they're worth. Really? So no one owns them, literally? You can't, nobody, yeah, nobody owns them. Really? Nobody owns them,

the public domain. How many movies, you think? Dude, I'm not an expert in this, but I'm pretty damn sure. Nobody, the public, once they're public domain, you think? Dude, I'm not an expert in this, but I'm pretty damn sure. What's their public domain? You've got to get this shit registered every 25 years or so. And if there's no one there to register, and most of those guys are in China,

and they're dead from the triads and shit. I had a friend of mine from my old Taekwondo days, my friend Larry Jones. Larry Jones was a fiend for Chinese Kung Fu movies. And he would always go, and he would come to the gym the next day. Oh man, I saw this badass Shaolin. He's Shaolin seven months. He would like, every week it would be some new fucking Kung Fu movie that he just saw and loved.

And he would get together with a bunch of his friends from the gym. And they would all go watch these kung fu movies. They'd get excited and watch these. They were like real fighters. They were going to watch these shitty kung fu movies and I tried to watch them.

I never got into them. I tried, man. I sat down with them. I tried to watch them. That's the problem. Anybody who got Bruce Lee first is not into kung fu theater. I don't think so.

I tried. You know what I mean? I think, I don't know what it is really. That's just my guess. But after seeing Bruce Lee, you're like, fuck these guys. Everyone's trying to, I mean, there was Bruce Lies out there. How about that?

Bruce Lies. There was more than one, right? How many Bruce Lies were there? How famous was he? Yes. Was he famous? Like in China? Was he going to the club, popping bottles?

You know what I mean? For a couple years, he probably got laid. He was like Dan Cortez. That's how dumb these people think the people are. That they could just put a fake Bruce Lee up and a good percentage of them are not even going to know the difference. Is it because he was almost playing a character,

would you think? Maybe he was almost like a James Bond. Well, when they put out Game of Death, they only had 10 minutes of that movie with Bruce Lee. The whole movie is not Bruce Lee. If you watch Game of Death, the beginning is, but the beginning of Game of Death is the

end of Return of the Dragon. They start with the Chuck Norris fight, so it looks like a Bruce Lee movie. But that's another movie. So they replayed that scene again, the exact same footage? That's how Game of Death starts. The only thing that's Bruce Lee is the end, where he goes up

and fights fights Kareem Abdul-Jabbar that's all him but everything the whole movie is an imposter I need to see that wow

I need to see that again too dude it's hilarious and there's in the beginning there's a scene where the fake Bruce Lee is sitting at his

dressing room because this is how they started it they start the movie with the fight with Chuck Norris in Return of the Dragon and then the movie is about a famous super martial arts superstar loosely based on bruce lee so once all the credits are over and the fight's over

they go cut and then bruce lee a fake bruce lee walks off set like all of a sudden that was just a movie that fight scene and it's about a famous actor and the Chinese tribes are trying to control him or whatever. So from that point on, it's a fake Bruce Lee the whole time. He's sitting in his dressing room. He's talking to this guy, this mafia guy. And they put a picture, a still picture, like right where his head's at. There's a still picture. So it's a picture of Bruce Lee.

You can see the guy's shoulders are moving. It's a moving picture. That's how bad it was. Wow. And everyone believes it. God, I want to see this. Everyone believes it. I was seven years old when that shit came out.

And did you know the difference? You didn't know the difference? I didn't know the difference. Wow. They fooled me. They fooled the kids. That's genius. Maybe back then that special effect actually fooled adults too.

And the whole movie he's got big shades on and they never get any close up. It's always from the side and he's got big shades on. Wow. I wonder how much that movie cost. Buck fitty. How much did that cost to make? They probably made a fuck load of money with it too, right? Because people probably thought.

It was a major movie. They didn't have fucking Yelp back then. They didn't have Fandora. You know what I mean? You can't like find out how bad a movie was by just going online. Like now, now you find out real quick if a movie's a piece of shit. It could be out a couple hours and people are already freaking out about it.

Even before, because people get screeners. They get previews before. People go to previews. You can't sneak a shitty movie through anymore. But back in that day, I bet it took weeks before everybody figured out that movie sucked. Game of death?

To kids, I thought it was great because the end is movie sucked. Game of Death? Yeah. To kids, I thought it was great because the end is a classic. It's still Bruce Lee. The end is strong. He fights Dan Inosano, Kareem Abdul-Jabbar, some Taekwondo guy. All that shit's beautiful. Yeah. That was pretty badass. And that's really the only scene people remember when they watch it as a kid.

You remember Game of Death? He's fighting Kareem Abdul-Jabbar. That's really all you remember. You don't remember all the bullshit in shit but when me and my friends would talk about the best bruce lee move move ever to what the the best bruce lee movie ever was actually done by the fake bruce lee a guy was holding him a guy was holding him like this he came from behind and held him and the fake bruce lee did a backflip, kicked him, and landed back on his feet. It was a fake Bruce Lee?

The fake Bruce Lee from Game of Death. The guy was holding him like this. He was behind him, and he did a backflip, kicked him, and then landed on his feet. I wonder if that one dude, if he still goes around. You remember that scene? You remember Game of Death? He looked like Bruce Lee.

It's not Bruce Lee. It's me. We need a documentary on the fake Bruce Lee. Bruce Lyle. All of us. Well, we need a documentary on the guy who did that flip. But there was cuts in it. So it wasn't like one thing.

There was some cuts in it. So it wasn't just some wild kamikaze type shit. But that was in the top three of best Bruce Lee moves ever. And it wasn't even him. When I met Chuck Norris, it was one of the few times in my life where I was genuinely freaked out. Like I'm shaking his hand

I'm going to meet him and he knows who I am he's talking to me and I'm like holy shit this is Chuck Norris. Like this is really Chuck Norris.

And the thing I thought about was that movie with him and Bruce Lee. I'm like this motherfucker fought Bruce Lee in a movie. You know what I'm saying?

I mean that is a crazy scene too. He's like the badass karate guy and Bruce Lee in a movie. You know what I'm saying? I mean, that is a crazy scene, too. He's like the badass karate guy, and Bruce Lee and him go at it. Holy shit, that was a good scene. It was hard to top Bruce Lee. Yeah, impossible. Just his face. I used to like Chuck Norris

because Chuck Norris was down with Bruce Lee by association. I'm like, even though Chuck Norris wasn't as dynamic as Bruce Lee, he was still in a Bruce Lee movie. And there was some cool shit about him because he was American. He wore cowboy boots and a fucking cowboy hat and he'd jack guys up. Sort of like

a karate but American style. I thought he was alright. He was alright. Lomolf McQuaid, him and David Carradine. Come on, son. Do you remember Billy Jack? Yes, I do. The cowboy with the roundhouse kicks. I think he was known for his roundhouse. Remember he would tell the guy, I'm going to put this foot upside your head, and there's not a thing you can do about it.

I remember thinking at the time, wow, that is fucking a white guy talking shit. But he wasn't really white. He was an American Indian. Nobody under 30 remembers Billy Jack. Nobody. Nobody knows Billy Jack. And Billy Jack, there was always these hippie bitches that were like around him bothering him

all the time you know he would like take care of the hippies and he was like half Indian or something wasn't he I don't

fucking know something along those lines that'd be cool if Chuck Norris flew around in Airwolf you know like that was his modes of transportation

if he flew around in a giant helicopter from the 80s remember those when did we ever talk about this it seems like we did where helicopters were really popular in the 80s and there those, did we ever talk about those? It seems like we did. Where helicopters were really popular in the 80s

and there was like Blue Thunder, Airwolf, and there was all these sitcoms about helicopters. Drama shows. Drama shows. Yeah, what the fuck was that about? Fucking helicopters. It's like, you know, it's like sort of we were talking about Knight Rider,

a fucking, you know, a show about a car. Right. But at least that car talked. This back then was just like, no, that's just a badass helicopter. Yeah, right? Remember it was Roy Schreider

using Blue Thunder? Yeah, Blue Thunder. That fucking stupid movie about a giant helicopter. Crazy. What the fuck, man? It's amazing when you go back just a couple of decades

and look at the shit that people were willing to tolerate. People were so stupid. You know, if you want evolution, man, you need to look no further than human television. Look at TV shows from like the 50s. Go try to watch like Andy Rooney. I was watching a clip online.

It was from the Andy Griffith show, and it was Jack Nicholson. Jack Nicholson was playing a bad guy. And Ron Howard was in it When he was a little boy Before he was Opie Pre-Ope He was Opie on Happy Days

What was he on the other show? On the Andy Griffith show He was the little brat kid He was a little boy And Jack Nicholson is there And it's like And it's so stupid It's just so obviously dumb

You know It's like if you had it on today You would just Start throwing shit at the TV Go what the fuck Kind of acting is What the fuck Kind of show is this

Who wrote this stupid thing But back then That shit flew That was That was entertainment I can't watch Fucking anything In black and white

Except for Twilight Zone I can still watch that Cause it It didn't watch fucking anything in black and white except for Twilight Zone I can still watch that because it didn't have they never had they sometimes had happy endings but you never knew if it was going to be

a bad ending sad ending happy ending I love that but one show 99.9 of everything back then to me

in my opinion sucked you're right I love Lucy every now and then you watch that there was some clever writing in I Love Lucy. I mean, that thing stood the test of time.

You're still showing it now. It's still on now. You're right. Most things suck, but there's a few that fucking, that really stand out still, like The Hustler. You ever watch The Hustler with Jackie Gleason and Paul Newman? Oh, the movie. Yeah, with who the fuck played Bert? The guy from shit, I forget.

But a very famous actor as well. And it's fucking incredible. Piper Laurie, that woman, she played a chick in the movie. It's a fucking great story. It's a good, well-acted movie. And it's from like 1963. There's a few. Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf?

That's Elizabeth Taylor back when she was hot as fuck. Elizabeth Taylor was hot as fuck back then. And Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf is a badass fucking movie that completely holds the test of time. If you watch that movie today, you'll be like, whoa, that was a good goddamn movie. And it was like from 1960 or something like that. There's a few movies from back then where they really nailed it.

They really got it right. Do you remember that movie? I forget the name of it. I think Joe Piscopo during his big, when he was kind of famous in the early 80s. And it used to have this little documentary in the middle. Johnny Dangerously? Is that the name of it?

Yeah. Johnny Dangerously was, what the fuck is his name? Joe Piscopo? Yeah, Joe Piscopo. And what was the other guy? The guy was Batman, the first Batman. Michael Keaton? Michael Keaton, yeah.

And remember the cartoon? As a kid, I remember thinking how cool this was that your penis in you and it was like this animated cartoon of this penis and two balls walking around and stuff i don't remember that yeah you gotta check out this penis sometime it's pretty george c scott was the other guy who was in the hustler it's a fucking great movie and that's 1961 man it's not even 63 61 they were idiots back then god damn they were stupid really man i mean it's it's a good movie but even though it's a good movie you could still tell like how goofy people were back then look at richard nixon you watch him talk if your bullshit radar doesn't go off when you're watching richard nixon just any kind of speech

it like it's like George W. Bush. Same thing. That's what I was going to say. If you can't say that because of Bush. The real problem with lying politicians is there's a lot of fucking dumb people out there, man. Yeah. George W. Bush is the master. For sure, he's the master of the dummies.

But Richard Nixon was pretty bad, too. Everyone else is not that bad. Bill Clinton, smooth. Obama, smooth as hell. Even Ronald Reagan was smooth as hell. Richard Carter, he sounds like he's a smart guy. Richard Carter. Jimmy Carter.

Richard Carter. Yeah, you know, that fucking guy. By the way, Opie Riz. Richard Nixon, he sounded like a smart guy, but he sounded paranoid and insincere in everything he said. Richard Nixon? Richard Nixon. Yeah, he was a piece of shit.

He was a terrible person. He was one of those guys that got away with shit back in the time where you could get away with anything. You know, the days before they killed Kennedy, you know, till Nixon's era and you go deep into Reagan, people were getting away with all kinds of crazy shit that you can never get away with now. And they got away with a lot of dirty fucking politics back then, too. What Nixon did was totally standard stuff. What he got impeached for at Watergate was something they all did, man. We've been doing that to the Russians forever.

You know, I have a buddy, I guess we shouldn't say his name, who used to work for the U.S. Embassy in Russia. And he would find all these, it was like standard. They would find all these audio detection devices all over the place or audio recording devices where the Russians were listening into them. They found these Russian things that they made were so complicated that they operated on the swaying of the building, that that's what powered them. The swaying of the building. That that's what powered them.

The swaying of the building back and forth actually charged them up and powered them. Wow. So they had no external source of power. They were like, this was so complicated. He's like, when they found that stuff, he's like, we didn't even know this shit existed. So that's been standard. People have been spying on people and listening in to people. That's just what they do. Every fucking politician, every president did it. You don't think Kennedy did it? Everybody likes to look at Kennedy like he's this rosy, beautiful figure from our liberal past, but Kennedy And there was all sorts of people that were just like the Tea Party people are today

trying to get rid of Obama, going crazy about the democratically elected president, the Democrat president, rather. They were doing the same thing for Kennedy. They were wanted for treason. They'd make posters with Kennedy's face on it. Nobody likes to think about that shit because it happened so long ago. And what about the fact that he was, out of all the presidents that

have ever existed, he's the one who had the worst reputation as far as womanizing. Oh, yeah. Dude, if they found out what he was doing today, he was probably just straight Clinton-ing bitches. Clinton. More than Clinton. You think he was?

Oh, yeah. I shouldn't say Clinton-ing, because what a Clinton move is, Clinton moves, you get a girl alone, you just whip your cock out. And then they scream and fucking run away from you and freak out, and you go to jail. That's a Clinton move. He's the only president

that probably rocked it that way. He's probably Obama-ing that shit. Tearing that shit up. Obama's probably not doing anything. Presidents should be smart. If they're going to fuck around with these interns, offer them and their family a spot in the underground cities when shit goes down. They ain't going to say

shit. Eddie Brown was a firm believer in the underground cities. They're building them. It's not that much of a secret. Oh, yeah. I mean, I've seen underground bunkers and bases and shit like that, but you're a believer in that shit. You want to go there if the shit goes down? I'm trying to teach jujitsu to CIA agents to hook me up.

Hook me up. Give me a couple of VIP passes. hook me up hook me up give me a couple VIP passes dude the moment the moment

the first the first atomic bomb blows or the first asteroid hits I want to be under that thing I want to be

at the epicenter wherever that bomb goes off I want to be at the part where all they find of you is a shadow that's what I want to be

I want to be right there you don't want to live in the fuck that I'm not down with some Mad Max shit I don't want to be killing people want to be right there. You don't want to live in the Mad Max times? Fuck that. I'm not down with some Mad Max shit. I don't want to be killing people with axes and stuff. Imagine being sick and not having hospitals to go to.

Fuck that. That's going to definitely suck. I agree with you there. But if the bomb drops in New Mexico and we're feeling the fallout here but you're still alive, what do you do? Blow your head up? No. No. Look, I'm going to follow my human instincts and keep on keeping on.

head up no no look i'm gonna i'm gonna follow my human instincts and keep on keeping on but if i had to choose between living a life of fucking cancer and radiation and zombies or getting hit in the head by a meteor i'll take getting hit in the head by a meteor what's your take on the zombie situation it's funny how many fucking shows and movies and things there's people that believe they're real there's a radio show where they're talking about preparing against zombies well yeah i mean what The reason why is because we know about so many parasitic animals in the animal kingdom that change the host

and turn the host into something that it's not. There's an aquatic worm we've talked about before. Take a drink if you're playing the podcast drinking game. We've talked about it before. It reprograms a grasshopper's brain, this aquatic worm. It infests the grasshopper, reprograms its brain, and then convinces the grasshopper to drown. Convinces it to jump in the water and drown so that it can be born.

And it busts out of this thing's body cavity. It makes it commit suicide. So we know that there's all sorts of parasites that change the host and get the host to do their bidding. And we also know about rabies. We know that dogs get rabies. That's a wrap, son. They're dead. That's it.

You got to kill that dog. They don't even cure them. You can't cure a dog from rabies. You got to kill that fucking thing. And if you get rabies, you could die too. So rabies will turn a dog into a vicious fucking animal, like your own pet. I had a dog that had distemper once and it tried to bite me, man. A Doberman Pinscher.

Doberman Pinscher snapping at me. I was like 12 years old. I was stuck in my living room with this dog that was sick. And I realized like halfway through, like looking at this dog's eyes, there's something wrong here. I'm like, this thing is really going to get me. This is my dog. My dog's going to kill me.

Wow. I really thought it was going to kill me. We had to get the dog put down. It was scary shit. But what about people that are dead, they're buried, and then they crawl out of the dirt? Those people are retarded. That's not going to happen.

That's not a zombie like that. But what could happen is, you know, look, there's all these people that are getting their heads chopped off and frozen. You know about all that? Cryogenics? You know about all that shit? Yes, I've heard about it. Well, there's people that are getting their whole bodies frozen as well, like Walt Disney did, apparently. They freeze your whole body so that one day they can bring you back.

I believe that. And then regenerate your body tissue. I believe it. Well, that one day they can bring you back. I believe that. And then regenerate your body tissue. I believe it. Well, that might be when zombies happen. Yeah. Because maybe your soul's long gone, and all of a sudden you just got this tissue with no consciousness that needs food all the time and eats anything in front of it. And just grab a person and just start eating you if you don't feed it. That's why I don't want to be cremated.

That's the exact reason. I want to come back to life as a zombie. You want to do that? I think your soul can kill people. You're so rude. I'm not going to kill people. I could to come back to life as a zombie. You want to do that? Fuck yeah. I'm not going to kill people. I could be a cool zombie. Zombies all live on human flesh, bro. Do you not listen to the movie or pay attention?

What about the soul comes back? I got to go back. Walt Disney's going to be alive in a couple seconds. I got to go back. Maybe. Maybe they would be the first generation of people that came back with a memory of the afterlife. Because when Kenny died,

he came back. Yeah. Remember when he was playing video games in heaven to kill the Mormons? Right. Yeah, but Kenny died

like a hundred times. Yeah. That's ridiculous. But within the episode, he came back to life. That's never happened. Oh. Oh, really?

Yeah. Hmm. Yeah, every week he just came back and no one said a word about it. Robot Chicken, they had an episode where Walt Disney comes back to life and he became like this monster that just ate Puerto Rican babies. It's pretty funny.

The real possibility is the possibility that was expressed in that 28 Days Later, that someone comes out with some fucking genetically altered super virus that attacks the human body and literally turns you into some fucking freaky crazed monster animal thing like those 28 Days of the Ghost. Those fucking movies were awesome, man. Especially 28 Weeks Later was okay. It was alright. It was pretty good.

It was pretty good, but it was following one of the greatest horror movies of all time. There was no way it could fucking really top that. That thought is very terrifying to people. The thought that one day you wake up and the whole world's fucked and there's people out there and when you're sleeping, they're coming and they have axes and shit and they want to eat you. It's a terrible fucking thought.

People eating human flesh, it's been documented very recently that they think that it was done like ritualistically for thousands and thousands of years. And that people have been eating people like whether they killed them in battle or that small children, they found small children with tool marks on their bodies that they're positive inside their brains, in the brain cavity, that they're positive with someone scooping and scraping out their brains and cutting off their meat and eating it. So people have been, yeah, people have been preying on other people for forever.

Look, man, when people are starving to death, you know, if you're living like thousands and thousands of years before written language and people are starving to death and you're a bunch of fucking skin-wearing savages and you look over the hill and there's a bunch of other skin-wearing savages, you look back at your babies that are screaming in agony because there's no food in their body and you say i'm just gonna go kill these motherfuckers and eat them and people did that shit i bet they did that shit all the time they probably ate their own babies too they did eat their i'm sure they did animals do it all the time if animals do it for sure somewhere a human before it became the human

being of circa 2011 for sure someone someone did everything that an animal's done animals always eat babies i had hamsters man and they got a wet tail i think it was what it's called it's a disease i was a little kid and all of a sudden our sweet mama hamster started eating her fucking babies man and eating them brains first like just attacking the brain my mom was like get out of the room i don't want you seeing this get out of here and i had a peek in and see and this fucking hamster is just holding on to her babies and just brain are you kidding oh dude it was fucking deep man i didn't know that was a real thing dude it was deep it was so hard to watch

i was i couldn't believe what i was seeing this This mama hamster that I always loved. We had the mama and the baby boy and they got together and they made babies and the baby somehow or another got this fucking disease and the mother just killed them in front of us. Killed them and ate them, bro. It was fucked. I never looked at that bitch the same way again. She was

no longer my friend. You're rocking it to a different set of rules. I can't just pick you up and pet you now i want to bash your brains on the sidewalk you fucking creep you baby eating creep you know what the fuck man did you ever have those balls where you put the hamster in and it would like go around the circle and stuff like that yeah you know like they rolled around and everything i was so mad at my sister once and i didn't know she had her hamster in the ball. And so I'm like, how did I take this?

And I kicked it really hard, thinking I was just going to break the ball. The hamster just flew right out of it, though. And it was okay, but it was the most scariest thing ever. It lived? Yeah, but it was so gross. You know when you're a kid and you see something disgusting and you're just like, I'm not going to look at it.

How durable are hamsters? How durable are hamsters? How durable are hamsters? This motherfucker is filming a video and he falls down screaming like a little bitch just because he twisted your knee in a funny way. And this hamster, you kick it across the room and it's okay. Yeah, in a ball. Doesn't even need to go to the doctor. Yeah, hamsters. So speaking of people and their affection for animals,

I was in Pittsburgh this last weekend for the UFC, and it was the same time as a furry convention. And I don't know if you're aware of this, because I certainly as fuck wasn't. I had heard of the term furry. I'd heard it like very, very abstractly. I never sat down and had a conversation with anyone about it. It was just something that I'd maybe heard on the news or maybe saw, you know, an article on the internet or something that I never paid attention. I was like, oh, there's some people that have a thing

about wearing animal clothes and maybe they have sex with animal clothes on. I had no idea of the depth of this hobby or I don't know what the fuck you would call it, you know, this fascination, this thing that these people have, and this is what a furry does. What a furry is, is they want to look like a cartoon animal, like Bugs Bunny, I think the term's anthropomorphic, and what that means is, you know, human characteristics in an animal's body, and so they like Wile E. Coyote because he stands up straight and looks like a person. That's the shit they're into. So they dress in these costumes

that make them look like animated cartoon people that are animals, like dog costumes and fox costumes and coyote costumes. They look like mascots or things from an amusement park. Yes, exactly. Mascots is the perfect way to describe them. They look like mascots or things from an amusement park. Mascots is the perfect way to describe them. They look like mascots. And I guess a lot of them are wearing mascot outfits.

That's where they get these things from. And all they do the whole weekend is get together and play like they're animals. They don't talk. They have their own language of grunts and certain things that mean certain noises. Like they've created like a sub language, like a fake language. And when they were staying at the Westin Hotel in Pittsburgh, they sold out every fucking room in the hotel. Okay. So there's like 600 rooms in Pittsburgh at the Westin.

They're all furries. And they requested a giant litter box in the front lobby. That's so awesome. They requested that the Westin put in a fucking litter box. So front lobby. That's so awesome. They requested that the Westin put in a fucking litter box. So this is what these people do.

They go and get litter boxes and they bring them up in their room and they take shits in their litter boxes. They don't use the toilet and they don't wash. They like to,

if you don't, if you don't wash, you stink like an animal. And that's what they're trying to do. They're trying to smell like animals. Not all of them.

Some of them. Is it mostly zoos? No, no, no. There's women in it too. There's varying degrees of depth to how far you go into this thing. How ugly are the chicks? I don't know. You can't see. You can't see. They're wearing this fucking crazy outfit. The whole time? Yeah, you don't know what their bodies look like, man. They don't talk

so you don't know. You just know she's wearing a girl's outfit. So you assume it's a girl. And they have sex with their outfits on. And they have the opening in their crotchotch they like undo it or velcro or zipper or whatever the fuck they do whip their shit out and just bang each other right there with their outfits on they fuck all the time they fuck crazy yeah my girlfriend's actually before i even heard about this my girlfriend's been actually recently trying to get me to go to a furry party and she's like you know we won't have to have sex with anybody else and no one will know

who you are and we can just fuck. It's like an orgy by a bunch of furries. Your girlfriend wants you to bang her in front of a bunch of other freaks that aren't showering

and they're shitting in litter boxes and they're wearing... And she's just for the experience. And part of me almost would do it because no one would know

who you are and stuff like that and you see all these other... But I think just seeing a bunch of people fucking in costumes like that would be worth it i don't know it's like so bad some of them wear diapers too that's the other guy at the counter at the hotel was saying that it's a real horror show excuse me a real horror show for the maids the poor maids go in there after these freaks have left oh god these litter boxes and bowls of milk everywhere. They order

bowls of milk from the hotel and they have them bring it up in a giant bowl and they drink it out of a bowl like a dog. I'd be a bunny. Yeah, I would be a bunny. You're into rabbits all the time. Eddie looks into my backyard and he sees this rabbit running around and he's like, oh my god!

Look, it's a bunny! You got a bunny! And he runs and chases it. And you're like, oh my God, look, it's a bunny. You got a bunny. And he runs and chases it. And you're like, oh, he's so sweet. I love bunnies, bro. I love them. That's so funny.

People would think that that's a joke. No, that's for real, man. Do you think you could kill a bunny to eat it? Of course you could. Fuck no. Have you ever ate a bunny?

If I was starving, maybe. No, man. I don't even like those people say rabbit stew jokes and all that shit. I don't think that's funny. Really? You really have that much of an affection for rabbits?

Man, that's a little loving creature, man. I mean, we have a relationship going on. And, man, I love that fucking thing, man. I love rabbits. They look so cute. They're so fucking beautiful. And you know what? They don't meow.

They don't bark. They don't make any noise. And they love massages, man. Who doesn't love massages? But you know what? Cats love massages, and they ask for it. They're more flamboyant in the way they ask for it. But I pet a cat for, I have two cats.

I pet them for 30 seconds to a minute. They're gone. They don't want to massage no more. Not the bunny. He's willing to go all night. I could pet him. He seconds to a minute. They're gone. They don't want to massage no more. Not the bunny. He's willing to go all night. I could pet him. He ain't going nowhere. You know my cat, Spaz.

That cat, you could pet that cat for 100 days in a row. Oh, really? Not my cat. My cat, I pet him for 30 seconds and they're gone. It's on how they're raised. If they're raised with people all the time, like my cat's been with me since she was a kitten. So from the time she was little, it's all like, meow, meow, what's up, meow, meow, and pets, and every day it's affection.

So she associates people with affection. But if you're around a cat and you just go to work all day and you barely pay attention to that fucking cat, then the cat's like, yeah, you can pet me. Eh, I'm done with you. I got other shit to do. It's all how the cat grows up. Bunnies are so cute that even their poop is cute.

But the problem is that... It doesn't dry, it doesn't stink. You know, that was on Fear Factor. We were trying to get people to eat bunny poop. That was one of the things rejected by the network. That's bullshit. Maybe they... I would eat it.

They would say, drink your own piss, too. That was another one the network rejected. Rabbit shit don't stink, for real. You would eat it? I would totally eat it. Non-fat milk. My ex-girlfriend had a bunny, and the one thing I did notice, the negative part,

was that there was bunny shit everywhere. Like, little rabbit rabbit turds everywhere you pick them up with your hand they're like raisins yeah yeah wow how weird i love that motherfucker i have a whole room dedicated to him you have a room in your house dedicated it's all him he's got a whole room he doesn't even know he's captured i leave i leave the gate open because the gate goes around the whole room because we can't let him chew the baseboard so it it's a room, but there's a gate all the way around in the room. And we leave the gate open. He doesn't want to leave. He hates leaving that motherfucker.

I got a castle for him. I got a UFO for him. Do you have a car? I got his pod. Just get a little, like, bunch of cars. I build tunnels for him. You would make a great dad, dude. You don't even know.

The love that you have for this bunny is pretty fun. It's interesting to see. But the love that you have for this bunny is pretty fun it's interesting to see but the love that you would have for a kid would really freak you the fuck out yeah for sure you'd be like fuck that bunny yeah you would yeah you would animals take a quick backseat to your every woman that says that like when she has a kid i had you know i almost had i thought i had a kid for a few months you know that kid, he's 15 now. And I don't even want to talk about it. Whoa.

Just open up the door and close it on people. Did you meet him at a bar? No. Actually, what happened is an ex-girlfriend of mine when I was 26, she got pregnant. I thought it was by her, you know, I thought her new boyfriend got her pregnant. But there was a kind of gray area when she got pregnant. I was like, hmm, I think, you know, maybe it could be mine. She had a baby.

Her sister calls me up and says, hey, Moretta had the baby. You should come down and check it out. This could be yours. like mine she goes it looks kind of mexican because she was what they thought their whole family thought it looked mexican that's so i came down and i'm like oh my god i have a son i totally didn't want it i'd broken up with her like it was around nine ten months ago or maybe longer and i didn't want to have anything broken up with her like it was around nine ten months ago or maybe longer and I didn't want to have anything to do with her I mean we were done

I had a new girlfriend I was moving on and now this kid could be mine I went to the hospital looked at the kid and all babies looked the same to me I'm like you guys think

it looks Mexican I don't know they go yes look look at his face I'm like he looks like me so I go let's take a DNA test then but you had to wait

three months before you could pull the amount of blood that you need to take the test. So I had to wait three months. So I broke up with the girl that I was with. And I, you know, I said, this is my son. I want to be around for the first three months, you know, so I'm going to treat him like my son. So for three months, he, he was my son. And by the third month, when it was, we were almost ready to take the test. I don't, I wanted him to be mine so bad. I'm like, man, I got my son. And by the third month, when we were almost ready to take the test, I wanted him to be mine so bad. I'm like, man, I got a son. It's three months.

Let's do this. Like, I was ready to do it. Let's go. And then it turned out, obviously, that he wasn't mine. And I stuck around for a while. And then me and the girlfriend broke up a couple times. And we would separate and come back and see him because I was in love with him. But it was like a six-month stretch when came back and he was around two after we'd break up. He's around two.

And when I got to the house, he looked at me and he didn't recognize me. He wasn't sure. And his mom was like, look, he's the one who took you to the zoo. And we're looking at zoo pictures and he's like looking at the zoo pictures and then looking at me. And he's like, he's maybe like, you know, a year and a half. And that look right there. I'm like, man, I got to bolt now. Yeah, now's the time to do it. He didn't even know who I am anymore.

I love this little kid. And he doesn't even know who I am. I'm gone. This was the guy in the picture? No, he was in jail. Wow. Yeah, that guy was in jail. So anyways, long story short, of course I think about him every now and then.

I'm like like you know I was in love with that kid I would have definitely he's 15 now he's 15 now he should teach him jiu jitsu I found him on Facebook and

I went through all the names that it could be I went through a bunch of guys and sent them messages I was like you know what I'm gonna

I'm gonna look for this guy wow so I found him holy shit and so I thought you know we went back and forth a little bit on Facebook. Did you tell him the story?

No. We never talked about it. Whoa. So he doesn't know. No. His mom's remarried. They got a little happy family going. I don't want to cause any problems or anything like that.

I just wanted to touch base. And, you know, he lives like five or six hours away up north and and and i i um i got a hold of the nearest jujitsu school around where he lives and i said man you're interested in taking jujitsu it's a paragon it's a jeff glove you know jeff glover some paragon it's a paragon affiliate got a hold of the guy. I said, you know, I told everyone he's my nephew. I didn't really want to get into details. It doesn't really matter. He's not my nephew, but I thought he was my son for a while. I thought, you know what? I'm going to get him

into jiu-jitsu. He's all into it, man. He's obsessed. Oh, wow. That's awesome. He's all obsessed with it. He loves it. Wow, what a crazy story. That's really cool, man. Did you ever think what would happen if you decided to just stick around with that little dude? Yeah, man. I do. I do. It's really cool, man. Did you ever think what would happen if you decided to just stick around with that little dude? Yeah, man. I do.

I do. Because at that point, within those first three months, that was my boy. I treated him like, you know, he was my son. He could be my son. I thought he could be. Deep down, I was thinking, I mean, everyone's saying he looks like me. I don't think he looks like me. don't think he looks like me that's it everyone's saying

he looks Mexican it's so funny he's so white now you know I didn't even know Eddie was Mexican I thought he was fucking with me for like the first two years because at the comedy store

you were like I'm half Mexican I'm like no you're not I'm full Mexican or you said something like that to me he used to say he was half yeah you said something else

half Japanese and half Eskimo was a famous one maybe he said half Japanese half Mexican or something yeah I used and half eskimo was a famous one yeah he said half japanese half mexican or something yeah i used to say that when i was a teenager just because i was an idiot and i wanted to see who would believe it and i'm like wow people believe anything dude you used to do that with a lot of things you used to like tell people crazy stories and see how far you can go with it man it still happens i mean the whole the whole the whole uh why do you get into doing that man do you have a hard time not doing if you look if

you look at the kwatu and then you look at and then you look at uh what we did on the joe show like with uh uh 10 foot screws 10 foot screws let me tell people there's something you don't know let me tell you what we did we were in denver and i was doing stand-up and eddie and tate and brian and duncan we were all hanging out and we were walking and we went through this little shopping area that what is it the six street mall is that what it's called whatever the mall is whatever street it is anyway we're going to this downtown shopping area and we see a wig store 2005 2005 was it and just as a goof we decided to go in this wig store and then first of all we were high as fuck and somewhere in this wig store

we came up with the idea of having a fake band and that you guys were all going to wear these wigs so we everyone bought wigs tate had this crazy afro wig and you had this crazy wig and everyone decided that we were going to play a band called 10 foot screws and we even announced the band like as having an after party in town so people thought that it was like a real band and eddie goes on stage i get off stage the show's over eddie goes on stage with his fucking wig on and sunglasses we have video of it still right yeah there was a whole show yeah joe show episode stuff which episode is it seven seven yeah how do people find that one just type in joe show seven but you know it's actually all the episodes were on your

website but since you move the servers now everything's kind of weird it was they were probably getting too much bandwidth um well the premise premise of it was Joe wanted to put together a reality show based on him going to all these clubs across the nation and his posse. And me, Tate, Brian, Duncan, Ari, even Larry back then. We were all... Larry's our producer. What do you think? We were all...

He was the producer. That's what Joe's show was. It was an actual reality show. He's the origin of the word powerful. When you hear me say powerful, it's all because there's one dude, our friend Larry. So the show was called The Joe Show.

You had it on your website. We did about 11 or 12 episodes or something. And episode seven, we were in Denver. We were trying to come up with a premise. And then it was all about, we just formed a band. So Joe's on stage. And the way we sold it was Duncan would get on stage and would say,

who's going to the 10-foot screws show tonight? That's what we're called, 10-foot screws. And that was Brian's idea. And so we wanted to, so Duncan was getting everybody in the audience used to the fact that we got 10-foot screws backstage, and they're playing a big show at the Holodome next to the El Pollo. El Pollo Loco.

6'3 to El Pollo Loco. So people were like, oh, shit, there's a concert tonight. I didn't know about this. 10-foot screws, are they big? So then was Ari there, too? Who else? Ari wasn't there. Ari wasn't there for this.

So Duncan was selling it. He was like the host, and he was selling it. We got 10-foot screws tomorrow. We're going to give away some tickets. So I got a stack of half-off drinks on Tuesday night. I got two stacks of them. And Duncan introduced me. I was the lead singer.

I was the total douchebag lead singer. I was just basically playing the singer of Oasis backstage. So I got up on stage and said, who wants these tickets to the show tomorrow backstage they were going nuts

so like Paul Stanley I divided the crowd to one side and I said just like Paul Stanley I go okay this side let me hear the noise I go one two

let me hear the noise they went and then I stopped them and I go this side it was just a total Paul Stanley 1985 rip off most bands do it. Dude, find that.

Find that and cue it up. Just that part of it. Because it was so ridiculous. When I threw those tickets into the audience, dudes were flying headfirst over tables that were scrambling only to find that there were Tuesday night half-off drinks. And you're some crazy man wearing a wig for a band that doesn't exist. Yeah, so when the concert let out, people had to walk by backstage.

It was weird. The club was set up weird. They were walking out next to backstage. So we had the door open, and dudes were walking by going, where's that band? So we grabbed one dude, and we pulled in maybe three dudes, and we pulled them, closed the door. Now they're backstage with 10-foot screws. And me and Tate are just total douchebags. We're total douchebags.

Do you remember those fucking questions you guys, now that I'm thinking about it? It was a great show. The guy who got down on his knees? Yes.

Remember that? He wanted to, he was just down to do whatever to hang out with the band. He didn't, he thought we were a real band so we got him

to do crazy shit. He just wanted to hang out with the band so we go, we're going to have to get on your knees. Okay, you're going to have to pray for us. Pray with us.

Like, you know, bands sometimes pray before they go out. Thank you, Jesus. And he would repeat, thank you, Jesus. And you said, for this dick I'm about to suck. And then he jumped up and ran away. You remember? And then Tate was, he was like six foot four. He was so intimidated.

The guy didn't want to, like, fire back. Right. Because Tate's sitting there looking like a monster, you know you know he was scared and then we got girls back there he probably thought that you were about to try to get him to suck your dick like he really probably thought that i mean you think about it you're some fucking wacko living in colorado you know some dude who's willing to go to some green room for some band that he doesn't even know never heard of before some band that doesn't even exist he's on his knees praying back and forth to you. In his head, when you said that for this dick

I'm about to suck, he probably thought, oh, I fucked up. I done fucked up. I'll do it, but damn, I'm not going to like it. That was a great episode too. And then the other good episode was when we were in Boston. Remember in Boston and Ari and Duncan,

they both sold to the audience. They opened up and they said backstage we're auditioning for the Joe Rogan live story that they're going to film. And we're looking for guys to play Joe Rogan. We want authentic guys from Boston. So the guys in the audience are thinking, oh shit, they're auditioning to play

Joe Rogan? I think I could do it. You could do it, honey. You could do it. So people lined up and we had a fake audition. Like, I could do it. You could do it, honey. You could do it. So people lined up, and we had a fake audition. Like, I'm this badass. You probably shouldn't talk about this, because I think what you did was illegal. Was it? Yeah. I'm pretty sure what you did is totally illegal.

I'm sorry. Yeah. This didn't really happen. We deny this. Oh, yeah. Yeah. This is all in another dimension. We deny this.

We deny this. In a parallel universe. Eddie Bravo does not seek to get sued at this moment in time. This is all fiction. Duncan was the director? Never happened. He never happened. This didn't take place.

You can't be saying this. For sure? Did you just fart? I think probably. You just farted. No, I did not. I know. I smell it too.

No, I did not. Man, we need some air conditioning up in this mug. Did you fart? You wouldn't do that, would you? That's Eddie farting. Listen, this is not helping the podcast at all. Not one moment. JoJo 7 is unfoundable.

Unfindable? Well, we have it somewhere, right? Did you Google it somewhere? Yeah, it's not even on Google anymore. The location it was on was on your website. But do you have the raw video still? I'm sure I do on backups. Listen, son.

You might not have it. You may have lost that. Is there a chance that you lost that forever yes Brian how sad I really doubt it well I've had a hard drive die on me recently we need to find that man because that was that was a classic for sure somebody saved it oh it's gotta be someone out there that say i'm 100 sure i have it but it's just finding it those aren't those things don't make me laugh anymore those tricking people things like jackass type things no i shouldn't say jackass like punked type things they don't make me laugh anymore they used to make me laugh you know i used to think oh this guy's getting fucked over like the jamie kennedy

experiment i thought that show was hilarious. That is hilarious. Guys Gone Nuts used to make me laugh. But now I don't want to watch that stuff. I don't want to watch people get lied to. I don't know what it is. I became a pussy. I became super sensitive. I don't like watching that.

Yeah. I'm like, you know, you're taking advantage of somebody for entertainment. That's not entertaining. I like my Poohberry Fleshlight joke. That gets me every time somebody does that. Poohberry Fleshlight? Yeah, I told you this. I have a fleshlight joke. That gets me every time somebody does that.

Poo berry fleshlight? Yeah, I told you this. I have a fleshlight at my house, and then this guy gave me this thing called liquid ass. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's poured in the poo berry. You make people smell your fucking poo berry fleshlight. I don't make it. I'm just like, hey, you should try the new poo berry fleshlight.

It smells like blueberries. That's not that funny. It is funny when you see him do it, though. I've seen it. I've seen it. I've seen it on video. You think in real life it's funnier? Just because you get to watch the real sick and... I don't know.

It makes me giggle. Seeing somebody's face when they're smelling poop just makes me giggle. It used to make me laugh. That kind of shit used to make me laugh. It doesn't make me laugh as much anymore. The premise has got to be good. If there's a good premise, you can't just... It's got to be deep and good.

The best one recently is Tebe, Jason Tebow, his girlfriend Danielle. She never did it, so she opened it up and she smelled it. She's like, oh, it smells like a homeless person's underwear or something like that. And then I'm like, put your finger in it. And I had just poured a new fresh thing of liquid ass inside of it. So she puts her finger in it and it gets all over her hand and her whole hand smells like poop. You're 12 years old. This guy's 36 years old.

Can you believe that? He's a 36-year-old, 12-year-old. I love it. Let me see your ID. I don't believe it. He is. I'm not lying to you. This motherfucker's going to be dressing up like Winnie the Pooh next week, banging his

girlfriend and a room full of strangers. She's going to be dressed up like a little fox. Would you admit, though, that that's going to be interesting to see? Oh, yeah. Listen listen i would go no doubt about it especially if you know i knew for sure that the crotch and the ass of my thing was zipped up right nobody could get at me right you know i would go i would just think they'd be crazy though man i think they just do that shit to each other and they just like it could get like really uncomfortable i think some of them are probably pretty normal.

But I think whenever you get an opportunity to completely pretend to be somebody else, you get to dress up in some outfit. You don't even talk. Everyone agrees to not talk. You get to see, like, how wacky some minds are. Some people's brains are fucking fried, you know. And you kind of put yourself at the mercy of being around those people without being able to filter them socially. at the mercy of being around those people without being able to filter them socially. You know, if we're all sitting around talking, after five, ten minutes, we all kind of figure out where each other's, you know, vibes coming from. We might do something that surprises us, you know, if you find out someone's a little weirder

than you thought, but for the most part, you get a kind of vibe, and some people get a vibe immediately, okay, I don't want to talk to that guy. Well, when that guy's dressed up like Wile E. Coyote, you don't ever get that vibe. Yeah, you're going to have that one Wile E. Coyote guy walking around, creeping everybody out. Yeah. Maybe that's what excites him. Fuck yeah.

I bet a lot of them... Look, I think that would be a great thing for a serial killer. A great thing for a serial killer would be go and hang around with a bunch of other people that are dressing up like this fucking weirdo outfit, this weirdo animal thing, and you could wear one of those weirdo animal things and just infiltrate them and then hang out with them in a way that other people are never willing to hang out with you.

The bunny serial killer. Yeah. Don't you think, like, I would assume that most serial killers, like if you were around them, you'd be tripped out by them. Like most of them, like you would get a weird vibe from them. Most of them, right? Wouldn't you assume? I mean, do you think that serial killers would be able to just like sneak on by you or do you think you would get like a weird vibe from them, most of them, right? Wouldn't you assume? I mean, do you think that serial killers would be able to just sneak on by you,

or do you think you would get a weird vibe from them? I think I would definitely be able to get a weird vibe from somebody, but then, of course, I have no idea. You have no idea, right? It's all speculation. Especially if you have a lot of friends. The more friends you have

and the more people you come in contact with, you can spot those in a second. People that look at IDs all the time, you can spot them. You just see good ones all day, and you see this one's different, this one's different, and it's not the same. Yeah, you're right. If you have a bunch of different friends, and you run a bunch of different people, and if you're honest, that to me, I think, is the big one.

If you're a real honest person, and you're honest in the way you communicate with people, you pick up deceptive behavior very quickly, because it just seems off. You have your guard down, you're relaxed, you're open. And then you see something that's like just not quite real. There's something about what you're saying that seems like bullshit. I think psychedelics also helps that sense too because you actually see the person's inner soul at certain points of doing psychedelics where you can see their energy.

And ever since you see that or feel that feeling, I think you kind of have that feeling in the back of your head. Do you ever go to movies when you're high? Yeah, absolutely. You know how when you can tell that they're acting bad?

Yeah. Dude, I saw The Hulk, the Eric Bana Hulk. And Eric Bana's a great actor, don't get me wrong. He's in that movie Chopper. He's a bad motherfucker in that movie.

But in The Hulk, there was some scenes where he didn't really have much to do and it didn't seem like he was the most focused you know there's a few scenes where him and this chick are talking and i'm listening to the two of them talking like this is so not real like i remember in the movie theater going this is like some of the worst acting ever this is so fake it seems like so you're not committed to what you're saying you're not thinking about what you're saying but it's because thinking about what you're saying.

But it's because of the we. That we just lets you tune into it. But it's that way with a conversation too. You've been high before when you feel like someone's lying to you. It feels like even more so. It's even more shocking and weird. If you're vulnerable and you're a little high, maybe you get a little touch of paranoia. And then you realize that someone's lying to you, you're like, ugh.

It just feels fucking gross. Yes. Yes. Yes. Let's you tune in to that. Eddie's thinking about bunnies right now. He's thinking about that 15-year-old kid. I'm thinking about, I don't know how to break this to you, though, but these are fake, bro. Dude.

The glass skulls are fake? Dude, dude, I got it from Amazon.com, okay? It's guaranteed. It's legit. What are the worst conspiracy theories out there? Crystal Skull? Or Bigfoot? Oh, no, Bigfoot's not a bad one, man. You know, there's an Animal Channel show right now.

It's called Finding Bigfoot or something like that on the Animal Planet or Animal Channel. Yeah, I've seen the commercials. Because of one video. I was in Spokane this past weekend, and as we're landing in the spokane airport you know you're looking at all like the forest and the pine trees and and you know i started thinking about sasquatch i'm like i'm gonna ask the guys at my seminar

what they think you know so in the beginning of the seminar i go by show of hands who believes in sasquatch this is the kind of jujitsu school that Eddie's running. This is how he starts off his fucking seminars. I wanted to know this. Sure. Nobody raised their hand. So I'm like, shit, none of you guys

believe in Sasquatches? Holy shit. So I'm thinking right there, okay, if these people live here in Spokane, small city, in the woods,

if they don't believe it, then a couple guys start going, well, you know, you never know because of this and because of that. And I go, wait a minute. So you're saying you kind of believe it.

And I go, okay. By show of hands, who thinks that maybe they exist? They all raise their hands. Whoa. They all. I go, really? They just didn't want to raise their hands initially because they didn't want, you know, they were probably ridiculed in school. Well, here's some weird facts.

First of all, there's 250 different native american names for sasquatch 250 different names for this big hairy man that lives in the woods and the primary uh the the big predominant you know uh group of sightings is in the pacific northwest do you think if they had the internet back then one back then it would only be one name, right? As 250 people talked about it, and they all made up their own name. Well, no, they had a bunch of different languages, too. I like Sasquatch the best.

That's the Indian name, right? Sasquatch? I like Henry. The reason why it's interesting is because so many different names exist for it, because there's no other mythical creatures in the Native American, I don't think they have a mythology that has like, maybe different Indians

do, and some of them do and some don't, but for the most part I don't think it's like the Greeks had all these fake gods and all these different, you know, the Griffins and all these different things that they had created. There was obviously a lot of fiction going on. I don't think there's that much fiction in the Native American folklore. So when there's all these different names for this one animal, it makes you go, hmm, maybe there was a thing like that at one point in time. And then there's so many fucking sightings of these things. And that makes you go, hmm, maybe, well, what the fuck would it be? You know, how could there be an ape that no one's ever heard of? Then you find out that it's not an ape that no one's ever heard of.

There actually was an eight-foot-tall, erect, giant ape called Gicantopithecus that actually lived in Asia, and lived in Asia as recently as 100,000 years ago. And they think that this thing may have come down the Bering Strait along with Native Americans. When people first came to America, 10,000 years ago, half of North America was under a mile-high sheet of ice. So there was a connection, actually, between us and Russia and Asia. And animals would come across that connection, the Bering Strait. And that's how people supposedly got here. And they think that it's very possible that at one point in time,

this now extinct animal that they know exists made that trip as well. This animal, they say it definitely exists. It wasn't just like a really tall person. No, it's called Gigantopithecus. They found this thing because they found an extraordinarily large tooth in one of these Chinese markets somewhere. And it was a tooth that they knew was a primate tooth,

but it was so large they couldn't believe that it was a human's. And so they tried to figure out what it was, early man, what the fuck it was. And then they found some other bones and then eventually discovered that there was an actual animal called Gigantopithecus. So what about the argument that you don't find bones or cartilage? You don't find bears either, man. Ever?

You don't find dead bears. Who eats the bones? If there's a small population of them, if there's a small population of them and one of them died, things that die, there's a video, a time-lapse video of Africa, which is obviously much more predatory than the Pacific Northwest. But in this time-lapse video of Africa, an elephant dies, and these hyenas start tearing this elephant apart, and even some lions actually scavenged a little bit.

The thing's gone in three days. In 72 hours, it's gone. There's nothing. Nothing exists. And it's a fucking elephant. Who's eating the bones? Everything. They're all just chewing everything up.

They all just take things away. The hyenasenas smash bones. Hyenas, they have some of the most powerful bites in the animal kingdom. And the reason why is because they're scavengers. They smash bones and bite off chunks of meat from the bones. Hyenas are just ruthless cunts. They're the fucking total cunts of the animal kingdom. They're just mean, vicious, fucking horrible animals that screech and laugh.

And the females are larger than the males. The reason being is because the males are so evil, they eat their babies all the time. So to keep the males from eating the babies, the females have to be larger than the males. And the females have a fake dick. They have a giant faux penis. And they mount the males and dominate them with this fake dick. It's a giant arm hanging from between their

legs. It's the creepiest shit you've ever seen. This giant female, who's bigger than the male, humps the male and dominates him. It's a matriarchal society. I want a fake dick. You got a real one though, Brian. I want two. If you look up Gigantopithecus though, they have

skulls of this thing. That's interesting. I didn't even know about that. I thought it was just like a caveman. Well, you know, they don't have a full skull, you know, but they have enough that they piece together what it would look like. You know, they have bones and various, you know, parts of jaws and stuff like that. Why no video? Yeah. They don't exist anymore.

They probably don't exist anymore. They probably did exist, like, maybe even just a few hundred years ago, and they probably died off. Or there even just a few hundred years ago, and they probably died off. Or there might be a few of them out there. It's really possible. The thing, if you went to Spokane, you know that as you fly over that Pacific Northwest,

it really occurs to you how fucking dense that shit is. There is so much forest up there. It's hard for you to wrap your head around. It's hard for you to wrap your head around over an hour of flying through the air, and it's still forest. And that's what it is up there. I mean, it's some dense you to wrap your head around over an hour of flying through the air and it's still forest and that's what it is up there i mean it's some dense dense shit so if you think that they've absolutely done a survey and an account of everything that lives in that forest you're crazy there's no way they have they just killed a fucking uh jaguar or a panther rather in

connecticut they thought that there was no panthers on the East Coast for a long time. The last one, I believe they killed in New Hampshire in like the 1800s. You know, when the settlers first came to the East Coast, they eradicated most of the mountain lions. But they just killed one in Connecticut, 140 pounder. And they saw, there was a spotting of one in New York, 20 miles away from that. Could have been the same panther because they're known to travel like 100 miles in a day sometimes. So it could have been the same panther that went 20 miles away. But they don't know where this thing came from.

It could have been a pet. It could have been a pet. But it also could have been something that was living in the fucking woods. It's really possible. They did used to exist. They're so hard to find, man. I saw one when I lived in Colorado, but

it's fairly rare to see one. I've talked to people who lived in Colorado for years and never saw one. But there's plenty of people that have. But they've got a documented population of thousands of mountain lions up there. It's not like they're scarce. They're just kind of crafty.

They're crafty animals. And that's way more populated than the Pacific Northwest. You know, if you're living in a place like, you know, Spokane or any of those areas where they have those Sasquatch sightings, it's always like Northern California. It's always like the rainforest, man. There's some fucking sounds that these guys have recorded. And it could be hoaxes.

But people who have studied these sounds, like primatologists have studied these sounds. There's some fucking sounds that these guys have recorded. And it could be hoaxes. But people who have studied these sounds, like primatologists have studied these sounds. They said they're primate in nature. You know, they don't know what the fuck it is. But these guys are camping out in the woods and they hear these screams and these screeches in the night. Who knows? The thing that has me curious is that there's an actual animal. And there's pictures of this thing.

Look at this. This is Gigantopithecus. I mean, look at it. It's a goddamn Bigfoot, man. I mean, the real animal is a Bigfoot. It's an animal that absolutely existed. That hoax was based off of, probably. It could be.

It could be, man. It could be. It could very well be a hoax, for sure. Or it could be there's a big fucking ape out there. But the thing is, if it did exist, bro, here's the thing. If that that fucking thing existed it would be in a cage right next to the gorilla at the zoo and nobody would give a fuck it's because it's a mystery that's so intoxicating to people we have this weird thing where we want things that are secret we want things that we don't know yet oh i don't know is it real is it real And we want to uncover these fucking secrets, this deep desire to do that more than to accumulate knowledge. Like people have a much, much stronger

desire to find secrets like ghosts, something retarded like that. Like who the fuck cares? Ghosts have never killed anybody. You know, you don't get anything from ghosts. You know, you can't record them on film. Everybody that sees them, they all sound like they're full of shit. You know, you really believe in ghosts, man? You're gonna dedicate your time to ghosts? Seriously. But what I was gonna say is, when there's all this shit out there that is real, and it's fascinating,

some incredible shit that they're discovering, you know, they believe that there may be small black holes traveling through our galaxy and that can pass right through the sun. They can go through the sun. And we wouldn't even notice it. We would see a little blip, a little blip out there,

and they would just pass right through the sun. They know that there's a fucking RV-sized asteroid that just whizzed by our planet just the other day. Just yesterday, I think it was. Like, really close, between us and the moon. It went fucking flying by in the same orbit the same place as satellites are that's how close it was it's rv sized i mean you know that's pretty small as far as as far as asteroids go but if it hit if it hit a city or something like that yeah but that would

have gone through our our whatever shit atmosphere yeah atmosphere burned out maybe depends on what it's made out of they don't all burn out the really scary ones are the ones that are made out of iron yeah you know the there's some there's some that are made i mean comets when you see the trail of a comet that's because it's mostly ice you know that's water that's there's so much fucking water and comets at that trail is actually the the water vapor like coming off this giant fucking hunk of ice those are not nearly as terrifying as the ones that are all iron you know the ones that are all water and all sorts of other shit, you know, as they're getting close, a lot of it's going to go away. But, you know, even when it blows up in the atmosphere, even when it erodes in the

atmosphere, sometimes it still produces insane damage, man. Like there's an area of the Soviet Union that was hit by a meteor in, I think it was the turn of the century, and it's called Tunguska. You know, that's the area. And there's photos of just flattened miles and miles of trees. I mean, it just is fucked. Like, they got hit by a nuclear bomb, man. And there was no actual asteroid. By the time it got to Earth, it had been eaten up by the atmosphere.

Those fucking things are terrifying, man. I want to know if a ghost kills a ghost, then you die and you're on the same level as the ghost. Can you then kill that ghost and he goes into another ghost level? You mean if a ghost kills a person, you become a ghost? Can you kick that ghost's ass for killing you? Yeah, and then you kill the ghost in the ghost world. You can't kill ghosts, though. Has a ghost ever died in a movie?

That's the thing about ghosts that's so scary. You can get rid of, though. Has a ghost ever died in a movie? That's the thing about ghosts that's so scary. You can get rid of them if you have a good priest. A good priest who loves his mother. But if you don't have that, the fuck, man? You can't kill them. You have to be able to kill a ghost in a ghost level. You never can kill them. It has to be a third ghost thing. Bullets go right through them, dude.

You can't kill them, bro. That ghost level would be really crowded then. The thing about ghosts is that they have to trick you into dying. You have to get scared and fall down flights of stairs and shit. You have to get scared and back up into an open elevator shaft. That's how ghosts kill you. They can't really do shit. They're just bluffers.

You know what's funny? Ghost Hunters is a real TV show. One? One? There's like a bunch of them, man. There's more than one. Dude, there's a ton of ghost shows. There's a ton of ghost shows. And they're all exactly the same. It's all a bunch of them. There's more than one. Dude, there's a ton of ghost shows. There's a ton of ghost shows.

And they're all exactly the same. It's all three stupid white people. And occasionally there's a black guy with glasses. And they're in a basement. And they have night vision on. And then they go, did you hear that? And then they cut the commercial. And then they play music.

I'm like, why are you playing music? Cut the fucking music out. And then they edit. There's nothing to see here. That's the thing about a ghost. There's nothing to see here that's the thing about a ghost there's nothing to see here you can fucking look all day no one's the most you have is like some weird image you know a whispery image and again it's only interesting because it's unknown it's only interesting because people think there might be a ghost might be real it's a secret thing it might be real how crazy is i mean it. It might be real. How crazy is... I mean, it all depends on

what you define as a ghost. You know, something that isn't in this plane or whatever. But, you know, when you talk science, the smartest motherfuckers that have ever lived were the Nazi scientists. They invented missiles. They were so far ahead of everyone else in science and technology.

Dosis gut. You know what I'm saying? When they went down, Russians raced in and took half their scientists. The Americans took the other scientists. Yeah, a lot of people don't even know that our space program is based entirely on Nazi science. They were the smartest motherfuckers. Yeah, word of Von Braun. And they were down. I mean, according to ancient aliens, I don't know.

According to ancient aliens. That is maybe know if... According to ancient aliens... That is maybe the worst reference you could ever say. It's like, according to Wikipedia, you are a fucking Skull and Bones member. Aren't you going to have that dude on your show? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm very excited about it. Be nice to him. No, I am being nice. He's a nice guy. I like the guy.

Well, you just said it's the worst. Because it's a show. It's an entertainment show. I mean, he talks about Atlantis maybe being a spaceship that flew off in the sky. Of course it was. Maybe it's a rabbit and it ate a giant magical carrot and that created the end of the Atlantean Empire. Did you see the episode about the Nazis, though? Yes, I did. It was fascinating.

It was fascinating, the actual facts of what the Nazis were into. And a lot of what they were into is like ancient Hindu scriptures, like the Vimanas. They studied all these, you know, Vimanas were like these flying things in ancient Hindu scriptures that from thousands and thousands of years ago, these flying ships that people have always tried to interpret. Like, what the fuck did they mean by this? And the Nazi scientists were

fascinated by all that stuff. They were very much into the occult and very much into the idea of ancient knowledge. And you could throw that aside and say they were silly if it wasn't for the incredible technological capabilities that they had back then. BMW, they made engines for Nazis, man.

I mean, Volkswagen, that's the car for the people. There was so much. They made incredible rockets. Their rocketry was so far ahead of anything in the rest of the world. They were the innovators when it comes to the field of rocketry and space travel. How about Wernher von Braun? Yeah. Wernher von Braun and Hermann Oberth are both quoted as saying all that technology came from help from beings from another solar system.

They were channeling. They were channeling information. Yeah. To build UFOs. They built four different models of UFOs. And they're saying they were getting the information, anti-gravity information by the Vril Society, which Hitler was a part of.

And they were running the Nazis, the Vril Society. And it was all based on channeling from another solar system. There were this chick, I forget her name, Maria Ostich was the head medium and she was channeling ancient Sumerian texts and then they bring in a dude who can transcribe it. She had no idea what she was writing. It was an

ancient Sumerian text and there's instructions on how to build UFOs. They built four of them. It's on record. Hanabu 1, Hanabu 2, Hanabu 3. They built UFOs and they're saying I mean theyobu 3. They built UFOs. And they're saying... You mean they built spaceships.

They built UFOs. Well, UFOs are unidentified. Yeah, well, yeah, they built anti-gravity. So a lot of the sightings in the 40s and 50s and probably even to today are all based, or not all, but I'm sure a lot of them were German UFOs. Right, but when they say that they built something that's anti-gravity, that can't really be proven because we can't do anti-gravity today. So because we can't do anti-gravity, we don't have a working model that they actually had that we could fly around in.

A lot of that is speculation. But we do know that they were coming up with some weird-shaped aircrafts. I mean, there's some photos of them with these saucer-looking Nazi ships, like actual, undisputable photos. But they didn't fly. Who knows? I could make a spaceship. Well, who knows if they flew or not?

I don't know. Do you know that they didn't fly? No, but I'm not saying they did fly. I mean, back then, I really doubt it. They had four models. They had four models. Well, they had planes, man. I mean, they could make one of those fucking things fly,

which is just a jet engine. Right. You know, I don't know if it would, obviously, be any good. I mean, it might suck. Maybe that's why they stopped using it. There's a funny picture online of Adolf Hitler with an alien. I think he's just misunderstood. Adolf Hitler.

Dude, don't even say shit like that on my podcast, bitch. Didn't you pay attention to what happened to fucking Tracy Morgan? I was talking about Charlie Chaplin. There's all these weird photos of these fucking these things that the Nazis built man I don't know how many of these photos are hoaxes

and how many of them are legit but it's pretty fascinating man to me the most fascinating part is that they were using mediums to channel aliens from another source

but how do we know that that's true is that an ancient aliens thing? And, you know, you could... You know, it was probably the U.S. government. Yes. What are you doing? What am I looking for?

The what society? The Vril Society. V-R-I-L. Society. Yeah, it makes me wonder if maybe they were just really dumb. Yeah, we're talking to aliens, but they were really talking to our government.

And we're like, oh, yeah? Yeah. Well, you know, you can poo-p poo all you want the idea of secret societies, but the bottom line is almost every single fucking president has been a part of one of those fucking things in high school or in college. Yeah. That skull and bone shit is so disturbing that these people get together in college and decide to run shit based on, you know, this, this bond that they make when they're in college. But it completely makes sense.

If you pay attention to how people operate, man, especially if you could, I mean, the best way to keep something secret, really keep something secret, is to have a bunch of people who belong to some exclusive group and they won't rat anything out. It's like a group of buddies who will talk about man law. You don't say shit about nothing, nothing. What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas. this is that on a huge level you know

skull and bones is basically what happens in vegas stays in vegas on the biggest level possible raping the world causing wars doing all this crazy shit and doing it under this premise of we're all a part of this group that agrees to be running the world in secret what happens in iraq stays in iraq and they're putting they're asking you know they're asking each other to join this thing and that agrees to be running the world in secret. What happens in Iraq stays in Iraq. And they're asking each other to join this thing. And so to join it, they make them do some really embarrassing shit. You hear different stories from suck cocks to let guys piss in their mouth, all sorts of weird shit, and they get it all on film.

And this is how you become a member in this group. Everyone has to do these things. Dress up like a diaper, let dude shit in your hair. Just the most fucked up thing possible. And they film it so that they always have you. But who the fuck knows? That sounds like some shit that you're saying in your mom's basement and there's wood paneling on the wall and you're doing bong rips.

You're like, dude, and then they totally make you eat shit. Really? Yeah, man, that's what my cousin said. My cousin said that was real. Eddie, did you like Super 8? It was alright. Really? Yeah, man. That's what my cousin said. My cousin said that was real. Eddie, did you like Super 8? It was all right. It was all right, yeah. That's how I felt, too.

People got mad at me. We talked about it last week. I gave some spoilers away. I would see it. I'd see it again. I mean, if I didn't know any better, if I didn't know the plot, I would go see it.

It was a fun ride. The fat kid is a great actor. All those kids are pretty amazing. They were good, man. Elliot, too, was good. They're probably going to be spectacular fuck-ups later in their life. Bank on them. They're probably going to be amazing.

They're probably going to be Macaulay Culkin-esque. They're all going to be on Dr. Drew's show. If you watch the new episodes, Joey Diaz swears it's the best. Oh, Celebrity Rehab's already out? Yes. Started out. I noticed, I don't know, I looked on my DVR the other day. There was a couple of them. So I was like, oh, Jesus, here we go again. I out? Yes. Oh. I noticed, I don't know, I looked on my DVR the other day. There was a couple of them.

So I was like, oh, Jesus, here we go again. I love that show. It's my favorite. Lindsay Lohan's dad's on it. And Amy Fisher. Is he really? Yeah. Oh, wow.

Amy Fisher, the chick who got famous by shooting someone, she's on it. Like, she's a celebrity. She shot and married Joe Buttafuoco in the fucking face. And that made her a celebrity. That's hilarious. What kind of a weird world are we living in man where every fucking show is real housewives and teen moms and mob wives and what the fuck are we doing man you want to see real shit it's not even real shit we want to rise at the ufc and all reality shows that's like real shit we don't want to see fighting movies put out a fighting movie

most of those reality shows are bullshit you know know that as much as anybody. Yeah, but we think it's real. Most people think it's real. You know what I think it is? I think our lives are becoming more and more complex and people are more and more stressful and they have more and more real problems and they want to be distracted with a problem that they can focus on

that they have absolutely no stake in. So they could watch people with their drama and get mad at each other and crazy and screaming and this girl's fucking his wife and he's going fucking crazy and they're going bankrupt. But meanwhile, you personally have zero stake in it. So you can sit there and watch it and get totally caught up in it. And your life doesn't fall apart.

It's like cathartic. Makes sense. Totally makes sense, right? That's what I think is going down. If you want real proof that there's an apocalypse coming down, it's what the fuck is on TV. That's the real proof. The real proof is mob wives. The real proof is Real Housewives of New Jersey.

You watch these morons living their retarded life. They're non-introspective, no common sense, not thinking, egotistical, under the microscope and can't handle it the spotlights on them they don't know what the fuck to do they're acting crazy you hear their nonsense

talking that's the sign that's the sign it's all going down that's the sign Eddie Bravo you know what we should do Joe we should try to get tickets

to that Comic Con that's coming up fuck yeah I would love to go down there and start some shit we should speak we should speak at Comic Con

about podcasts totally like we're experts we should speak speak. We should speak at Comic-Con about podcasts. Totally. Like we're experts. We should speak. Somebody asked me to speak at the Zeitgeist Movement. There's a Zeitgeist thing, September 11th, 2011. You want to go? Where is it at?

I don't know. It's in LA. There's a series of them. Zeitgeist Media Event. They asked me to speak at it. Which I'm down, but the problem is, man, with all of these things, whenever you claim that you fucking got the answers, whether it's Zeitgeist or whether it's Scientology, I don't want to equate Zeitgeist with Scientology, but it's too late, I already did. They don't have the answers, man. And everybody's saying, if you look at, there's a website called Zeitgeist Debunked,

and there's a lot of shit that they got wrong, man, just straight wrong. Of course. When it comes to, even when it comes to the way they were backing up the history of religion, they got all these things wrong with Mithra, and it's been corrected on all these different websites, all the things that they got incorrect about. But they're so confident in these points of view that they can put these points of view out.

Is Zeitgeist anti-God? No, no, no, no, not at all. No, Zeitgeist is pretty interesting. There's a lot of Zeitgeist that I believe in. It's 9-1-1, right? A lot of it's 9-1-1. And also I have a problem with it, where there's things, when they talk about the towers

and how the towers fell. I just farted this time. This time was me. That was me. If you smell this fart. Don't run away, Brian. Don't be scared. Anyway, you're using this as an excuse to get up.

Did you fart? No, I did. I actually just had to go to the bathroom. It wasn't even bad. But since somebody didn't own up for the last one, I felt like I should own up for this one. I didn't fart, man. Okay, man. Maybe it was Brian.

Maybe it was Brian. Maybe it was Brian. It wasn't me. My cat's in here somewhere. And by the way, she took a nasty shit in that litter box in the bathroom. It might be that. Just wafting out here. When you guys shit, what percentage is explosive and which percentage is solid loaves? Well, I've been eating a lot of lettuce lately and I've also been drinking this new thing,

this vegetable drink. It's amazing, man. I got this Vitamix. You know, Kevin James lost 80 fucking pounds, right? Yeah, I heard.. It's amazing, man. I got this Vitamix. You know, Kevin James lost 80 fucking pounds, right? Kevin James looked great, dude. His face is skinny. He looks so healthy. He looks like vibrant.

It's crazy. And he got on this. He doesn't look chubby at all? Well, he's still got a gut. He's still, I mean, look, dude, he was 300 fucking pounds. He's got extra skin, you know, but he's in way better shape than. Awesome. It's almost since I met him.

You know, I met him in 91, maybe, somewhere around then. And this is about as healthy as I've ever seen him, as far as like his diet and what he's doing. And he got this Vitamix thing, and he swears by it, man. He's like, he told me about this book. Some woman wrote this book on, you know, how you're supposed to eat vegetables. And the problem is, you know, your body spends so much time digesting food and breaking food down that it causes a lot, it uses up a lot of energy so she has this

she tells you to take this blender and you blend all your vegetables together so I blend like kale and I blend cucumbers and I blend like a pear and then some ginger and some celery, a bunch of shit together into this drink that looks like the Hulk's loads.

That's what it looks like. Just this green, crazy drink. And I drink this shit. And first of all, my shit flows out of me like a river. So you explode? No, nicely. Just nicely. Just slides out.

Like if you were logging on a river and it was a nice, strong current to the river and you unloaded a whole truckload of logs into this river to take them downhill and they just went ah just travel downhill that's what it's like when i take a shit my my logs just travel downhill ah plop plop plop plop she comes out nice and so you don't ever have explosive no no that's probably mexican five percent how much you know what that is eddie that 100 what that is it's a food allergy uh you should get tested with food allergies

they'll test everything and give you a percentage up and down that how allergic you are of everything explosive shit it's food hours yeah yeah you'll be surprised after you eat your body because it's after i eat yeah yeah it's probably most likely bread i bet you have a food allergy to bread and then that might not be like you can't eat bread, but it could definitely be. Talk into the microphone more. Amazing. I think a lot of people have an analogy to gluten. Jeff's wife has an analogy to that.

Yeah, that's exactly what it probably is, man. Yeah, it's a real common one. Apparently, it's not that good for your body to be eating bread. Apparently, bread, even though it fills you up, you know, bread is great for poor people. You take your wheat and you make your bread and it fills your belly and it gives you carbohydrates. Apparently, your body doesn't like breaking it down. Especially processed white flour. Apparently, that's just glue.

You know, it's just like funky glue. Like, you're supposed to eat like Ezekiel bread. Like, Ezekiel bread is really good for you. I love that shit. I have Ezekiel bread with peanut butter in it. I don't even feel like I'm doing anything bad. You know, I don't feel like if I have a peanut butter and jelly sandwich on whole wheat bread, I'm like, how much sugar is in this, man?

This is all sugar, you know? But if I have like some Ezekiel bread with like some natural peanut butter, I don't feel bad at all. It's fucking terrific for you. Nice to eat that bread all the time.

It's great. Can we have a moment of silence for Fogo de Chão? I love that place. A what? A moment of silence? Why don't you fucking go? There's one in Los Angeles.

I was gonna say, I went there two days ago. Did you? God, guys. We need to do another death squad trip there. This is what we're gonna do, guys. We need to do another Death Squad trip there. This is what we're going to do, folks. We're going to take a trip to the Salton Sea.

Eddie and I talked about it. As soon as Eddie showed up, I got a book here on the Salton Sea, and I got two documentaries sitting on my desk because being the retard that I am, whenever a subject comes up on the podcast or that I get set hip to, I get fascinated by it. And the Salton Sea is the thing that I've been so fascinated by lately. And apparently Eddie says that Sonny Bono was the guy that was trying to And the Salton Sea is the thing that I've been... I'm so fascinated by it lately. And apparently, Eddie says that Sonny Bono

was the guy that was trying to save the Salton Sea. Trying to bring it back. And apparently, it can be brought back. Yeah. It could be fixed. According to the documentary, they... Which documentary is this? Is it any of those?

This one, Plagues and Pleasures of the Salton Sea. Plagues and Pleasures of the Salton Sea. Isn't that a John Waters documentary? I'm not sure, but it's amazing. I think it is. You gotta see that. Plagues and Pleasures on the Salton Sea. Yeah, I just received it.

Somebody sent me a video online. They linked it to me on Twitter. And I retweeted it. Yeah, go ahead, open it. It was a while back, maybe a couple weeks ago. And I watched this video online about this ocean inside. I mean, almost like an ocean. This huge man-made lake inside of California's

coast. And I was like, what the fuck? This is nuts, man. And then it talks about how toxic it became because of the runoff from all these different farms and that it got saltier and saltier to the point where a lot of the animals and the fish just fucking died and these people still lived there and it flooded out their house. And the city got flooded, yeah.

It got flooded and that's what fucked everything up. And when you see it, man, you're like, what the fuck? It looks like some crazy it looks like some Mad Max shit like we were talking about. It looks like Armageddon. Yeah, so we're gonna do a Death Squad photo shoot from out there. That's what we do. People live there.

There's 400 people that live there. That's incredible. It's cheap as fuck. You can buy a house or property for like man, it was a three. It's cheap as fuck. You can buy a house or property for like man, it was a three. It was probably $3,000. How much time does it take to drive out there? It takes about

two hours. We should build a Death Squad studio at the Salton Sea and just do once a month Salton Sea shows. If I could buy a house for $3,000 No, you could probably buy 300 houses. It might be 300, but I think it's 3,000.

Some of the people that they show that live there, seriously, they're like crazy homeless people. Like meth heads. Yeah. Well, that's okay.

As long as we don't leave any equipment behind. But what if we have a place, we set it up, we get some couches in there and shit, get an internet connection, bring our laptops

so we don't really have to have equipment there. We bring our laptops and our mixer, set that shit up, and do a weekly or a monthly show from the salton sea it's scary i mean there was a thriving mini french riviera right in california two hours away i think it's the biggest man-made lake in the country yeah and it's the biggest body of water in california it was thriving in the 50s Yeah. And it's huge. The biggest body of water in California. It was thriving in the 50s.

They were building all these condos and houses. People were moving out there. It was amazing. They were like, fuck Palm Springs. You ain't got no goddamn lake. They were going to salt and sea. And then they had a big flood. Like the levees broke and all this shit.

Because it was all man-made. Flooded everything out. People freaked out. And there's still people today that are living there that were waiting for it to come back. They were back, they remember the good old days. Wow. And it's dark.

It's like, it really is a ghost town. It reminds me of California. I remember Brad Pitt and David Duchovny. Remember the movie California? And they go through ghost towns. It's like this. Oh, dude, you've driven from California to Vegas before. You've done that, right?

Didn't you go with me when we drove and you and me and Dimitri and we stopped off in one of those little ghost towns where they had like a fake gunfight? Do you remember that shit? That wasn't me. It wasn't you? No.

It was me and Dimitri then. We were headed to Vegas to see the K-1. We went to K-1 with Dimitri. A couple times. We did a couple K-1 trips. Well, back then, there was no UFC in Vegas.

This is how old school we're going. There was no UFC in Vegas, so Eddie and I would want to go see fights. We'd have to go see K-1 in Vegas. Scott Coker used to promote K-1 in Vegas. And there's hardly no one there. It's a tiny little ballroom. The Bellagio.

A ballroom. It's like it was as big as where Tough Enough is. Yes. Just like that. Exactly. People don't know what Tough Enough is. Tough Enough is a local amateur show in Vegas. And we would go down there and there'd be, you know, a few hundred people and you'd get to see fucking Peter Ertz. Peter Ertz fought Stefan

Leko. You know, like high level, top of the food chain K-1 guys were going at it, man. There were some great fucking fights. The K-1 in Vegas was awesome. They should bring that back. I tried to talk to Dana about that. I tried to say, dude, man, maybe you should fucking get involved in K-1. Bring K-1 in. I'm telling you, think about what's the most

exciting aspect of the UFC. It's striking, right? You get the best strikers in the world. Look, I love watching Abu Dhabi. I love watching Marcelo Garcia and Pablo Popovich go after it. I love watching Jacare and Hadja Gracie go after it in Abu Dhabi because they're the elite of the elite grapplers. I also like watching elite of the elite strikers, you know, in just straight up striking. There's a lot of guys, you don't get to see their full striking skills in the UFC because they're always worried about getting taken down. They're always worried about getting submitted. They're always worrying about, you know, dealing with

certain things. So it's hard for them to relax and just get into the striking. But if you watch like that K1 Max, you ever watch that shit, dude? I'll be honest with you, man. I try to watch it. It's hard to watch it. Is it really? Yeah, I'm not that into it, man. I try to. Maybe it's because you don't have a striking background, man. Maybe that's what it is. To me, it's exciting as fuck. That's all I watch. When I watch fights, when I have the garage, you know, I have the setup in the garage when I work out, all I watch is K-1

Max. That's all I watch. It's hard for me. And Badr Hari fights. I watch that crazy motherfucker. Those fights are wild, dude. All that fucking just straight stand-up, man man when they're leg kicking the shit out of each other and flying knees and dude you can't watch that that doesn't sound exciting i can't i want to i want to like it but it's boring as hell wow that's so weird i want to it's got to be because that's not your background because like look i like watching pool

i watch professional pool i got hours of pool on my laptop i got like maybe 10 15 hours of pool matches on my laptop at any given time so if i'm ever in an airport by myself oh i'll watch mika eminem play f and reyes and i'll sit there and watch a pool match that i already know the the result you gotta you gotta be god i watch it happily i want to if i'm gonna watch striking it's gotta it's gotta there's gotta be a threat of the fight going to the ground I mean

if I'm gonna watch striking it's gonna be Chet Congo and Pat Berry that's what I'm gonna watch you know what I mean there's a threat of going down they were on the floor

they didn't stop it I mean that fight could have been stopped two different times easily was that not the craziest end of a fight

you have ever seen ever that's the greatest comeback in the history of combat sports I was watching it with a friend who doesn't train. He was just telling me right before the match, he goes,

I hate it when a fighter hurts another fighter and he goes down and then he jumps in his guard and then tries to knock him out. Why doesn't he just let him get up and stand up? I go, well, a lot of times when a guy's hurt, he throws haymakers and if you catch one of those haymakers while you think you have him hurt,

so many fights can just turn at the blink of an eye. You want to get him on the ground. You know, your natural instinct is, I got him hurt. Let me put him in a spot where there's no way he's going to knock me out. Exactly. So people just, that's a natural instinct. I got you hurt. Let me ground and pound you now.

And I know for sure that there's... You see even strikers do that all the time, man. Yes, exactly. They get on the inside. Real strikers. Yeah, they'll climb in a guy's guard. see even strikers do that all the time, man. Yes, exactly. They get on the inside. Real strikers. Yeah, they'll climb in a guy's guard. We were just talking about that and it happened. Yeah, yeah.

If Pat Barry would have just took him down and pounded him on the ground, that wouldn't have happened. Did you ever see Diego Corrales and Castillo? No. You never saw that fight? It was the boxing equivalent to that. Jose Luis Castillo and Diego Corrales. Diego Corrales was fucked up, he was getting dropped and battered, it looked like the fight was almost stopped, bang, he connects

and Corrales goes out, it was just like that, I mean, almost, except there was knockdowns and he counted, the excitement level of this was higher, because there was no counting, you know, it was like the fight was almost over at any second, and literally, Dan Mergliana got on top of them, was gonna touch them and stop the fight. Like he had his hands over them to stop the fight. But then Chet Congo went for a single and he changed his mind. Like a brilliant decision.

A lot of people said, oh, they should have stopped that fight. The fuck they should have stopped that fight. Look who won. He won by knockout. There's no way he should have stopped his fight. He still wanted to fight. He still could fight.

He still could win. And he did win. So there's no way they should have stopped that fight early. still wanted to fight. He still could fight. He still could win. And he did win. So there's no way they should have stopped that fight early. It was the absolute perfect stoppage. Look, you had to stop the fight

once Pat Barry was out because Pat Barry was unconscious. That's why I hate early stoppages. Oh, it's the worst. I'm like, oh, let him take an extra shot. They understand the danger. They're in there

because they're crazy freaks. I agree with you. I don't like seeing a guy getting blasted when he's already hurt because i know what it does to them i know the physiological effect did you see hey pull this up man pull this up roy jones jr can't say spectacular you're gonna listen to this man this is traveling all over the internet this is a really uncomfortable thing i saw it on my headphones yeah you'll see it you'll hear it in your headphones you don't have to see it because it headphones? Yeah, you'll hear it on your headphones.

You don't have to see it because it's just Roy Jones doing commentary and he can't say the word spectacular. He just got knocked the fuck out by a Russian guy. A Russian guy battered him in the 12th round. When white guys start knocking you out, you know it's over. It's done. Listen, play it. This is going to freak you out. Listen to Roy Jones.

She's starting to slip. Listen to this. Play it. Play it. This is going to freak you out. Listen to Roy Jones. She's starting to slip. Listen to this. We're hearing this. Roy Jones Jr. and Roy, what is it about Canelo Alvarez that has this region and this country starstruck? Well, it's just like we said. He's different.

He's something spectacular. He's different because he has different color hair. He has different color skin. Wow. That's crazy. If you different because he has different color hair. He has different color skin. Wow. That's crazy. Wow. That's the beginning.

If you see it on video, it's even more noticeable. Like, he really was. Yeah, and, you know, what's dark about it all, man, is that Roy Jones was the guy who never wanted to get hit. Roy Jones was the guy who never wanted to fight really dangerous fighters because he was always worried about brain damage because he was buddies with Gerald McClellan. Gerald McClellan was one of the best fucking middleweights and light heavyweights

ever gerald mcclellan was a fucking animal but in his prime he got in a fight with nigel ben and he caught a lot of weight for that fight and during the fight the fight was ugly and he blasted nigel ben in the first round but nigel ben had mad heart and nigel ben hung in there and was Benn in the first round, but Nigel Benn had mad heart, and Nigel Benn hung in there, and was there in the second and third, and they fought like dogs, dude, and they head-butted, and they clashed heads, and at one time, Nigel Benn and him clashed heads after Nigel Benn was jacking him with some punches, like, they were just going after it, man, and he, Gerald McClellan took a knee, he went down and took a knee, and then quit, and then sat down in his corner, and everybody was like, whoa, what the fuck is going on? And then he just collapsed.

Like, he was obviously done. Like, his brain was starting to bleed and he had realized that something was terribly wrong. So he tried to, like, you know, stop. He tried to sit down. Like, so much that a guy like him, who's just a furious killer, watched, like, the Gerald McClellan-Julian Jackson fight. Julian Jackson, rather. If you want to see some crazy, barbaric, top-of-the-food-chain KO action boxers going at it,

because Julian Jackson was one of the hardest punchers ever, and Gerald McClellan fucked him up. And it's a crazy fight. It's a fun boxing fight to watch. So Roy Jones Jr. saw that, man, and never wanted to be that guy. He was always scared that he would be like Gerald McClellan, man. He was always scared that he would have some serious McClellan man he was always scared that he would have some serious brain damage and he would get really badly hurt so he never took any damage

man he fought so smart and his reflexes were so good up until he fought Antonio Tarver he never really got fucked up and then he beat John Ruiz he went all the way up to heavyweight and who knows what he did to get to heavyweight cuz he was like 200 pounds and shredded and that's not normal usually when you do that you're doing some sort of testosterone or something you're taking something and when what a lot of people don't realize especially like fighters they don't know who to turn to they get their advice from you know from either shitty doctors or they get their advice from bodybuilders that are their friends or something like that what what people don't understand about hormones is if you jolt your body,

you make your body like hyper-testosterone levels where they're far above normal, what happens is afterwards your shit crashes. So when you get off this testosterone, if you take some crazy amount of testosterone into your system, your balls shut down. So you need double the time that you were on that shit to recover. So say if you went on a cycle and you were Roy Jones, this is hypothetically speaking, and decided to gain 20 pounds of muscle.

If you were on a cycle of steroids for three months, you need six months just to get your shit down to a normal level again. Your shit is fucked up, man. Your balls aren't working anymore. You're doing something that your body's not supposed to have. Your body's not supposed to have these levels in it. And so when your body has those levels, it shuts off natural production. And it takes a while for that shit to kick back in.

And if you watch the difference between Roy Jones' body from the Antonio Tarver fight to the John Ruiz fight. The John Ruiz fight, he fought at heavyweight. And the next fight is at light heavyweight. And he was, like, smooth. He looked like he had no muscle tone. He just didn't look good, man. He looked slow. And Antonio Tarver knocked him the

fuck out. And that was the first time he ever got knocked out. And from that point on, it was all downhill. And then he fought Glenn Johnson. And Glenn Johnson fucked him up. Glenn Johnson knocked him unconscious. Dead, stiff-legged, you know, just, you know, that arms up in the air when they're just out cold like that. Glenn Johnson did that to him. And ever since then, man, it's been a slow slide. You know, he fought scared against Hopkins. He didn't, he didn't go after Hopkins. He just was happy to win a decision or happy to rather to lose a decision and did not get knocked out. He never tried to win that fight. You know, Hopkins was just too good for him. And, you know, and then he fought that guy, Danny Green in Australia, he got knocked out in the first round. And then he fought this Russian dude and got knocked the fuck out in the last round and

it was ugly dude he froze up like halfway like like was crumbling and the referee the guy looks at the referee and the referee wouldn't stop it so he goes all right bang while he's crumpling while like Roy Jones is essentially slowly crumpling. This dude tees off with two full power shots and he face plants, completely unconscious. And so then he goes on HBO a couple weeks later and he can't say spectacular. We are watching the slow slide. We are watching everything that that guy was terrified of

when he was a 20-year-old phenom, when he was on top of the world lighting people up. What about that rap song that he did? Dude, you've got to talk in the microphone of the world lighting people up. What about that rap song that he did? Can we find that? Dude, put it... You gotta talk in the microphone. We can't hear you.

You know that rap song? Yeah, y'all must have forgot. Yeah, we need to hear that for 30 seconds. No, I don't think we can, man. Now that we're on Sirius, we're on Sirius Satellite Radio, we're not allowed

to play music anymore. At all? We get sued. Did you see this shit? Yeah, the Nebraska power plant is about to get fucking flooded. Here's a question. Why... Have you seen this shit? Look at the pictures. plant is about to get fucking flooded. Here's a question. Have you seen this shit?

Look at the pictures. Obviously, they have flooding problems here. Show Eddie that photo because that's just a trip. You have to see the photo. That's a nuclear power plant, bro. Why isn't there a wall at least the size of maybe 10 times the height of the current wall around that whole entire place if it's near water or the ability to get flooded well there's a lot of floods going on man that nobody ever anticipated you know what we're finding out right now with japan and what we're finding out with this as well is there's

there's not they didn't do a whole lot of what ifs when they built these fucking things right you know they first of all they don't have any options to shut them down if they don't have any power when they lost the backup generators in japan and everything got flooded out by the tsunami, they had essentially eight hours before that thing started melting down. They're fucked. There's no way to stop it. They made these crazy things,

these fusion or fission reactors, whatever they are, fusion or fission, which one is it, nuclear fusion? I think it's fusion. Fusion? Whatever the fuck it is, this incredible amount of energy in this one isolated area,

and they can't stop it. They don't know how to stop it. What's going energy in this one, you know, one isolated area, and they can't stop it. They don't know how to stop it. Those, what's going on in Japan right now, man, Michio Kaku just wrote a really fascinating and terrifying article about it, about how there are three complete meltdowns in those plants in Japan. And, you know, there's people online that are in denial about this for some reason. Like, someone in my message board was, you know, on a thread about this was like, oh, you know, on a thread about this was like, oh, you know, you're giving out misinformation about Japan.

It's not that bad. Like the fuck it's not, man. There's video online on YouTube of people that live miles and miles away that have taken Geiger counters and they walk around with the Geiger counter on

and then they take the Geiger counter and they put the Geiger counter on the ground and that's when it's fucking terrifying because in the air when you walk it around

it looks like, yeah, it's a little radioactive but not too bad. But then when you put fucking terrifying because in the air when you walk it around it looks like yeah it's a little radiated radioactive but not too bad but then when you put the fucking thing on the ground there's a couple videos like this you see that the fucking levels are off the charts like way into the levels where people aren't supposed to be anywhere near seriously yeah and it's on the ground man it's on the fucking ground because that's where apparently the the all the the radioactivity collects it collects on the ground so this guy takes this this geiger counter and puts it on the ground so i'm freaking out man so i bought some geiger counters on amazon i try to buy some geiger counters are you serious yeah especially after we had the conversation about rocket dine yeah rocket dine which is only

you know fucking 10 miles from here or something like that i had a total meltdown supposedly in the 50s that's probably where the zombies would start right in japan yeah dude i think what we should do with japan is we should help those fucking people that are anywhere near that place help them get out and then use that as a place to store the world's garbage that place my idea that's not your idea i've been saying that on stage for weeks bitch yeah and i said are you i'm the one that said that like dare you like two podcasts ago i said that i was like we should use nuclear places to put all our trash you don't remember that dude i said that too all right you think you said that before me yeah yeah i did but no it's not sure you said that before me before i

said it on stage 100 i doubt that bitch no because when i said you're like that's actually a really good idea he might be right now that i think about it yeah either way it's a perfect idea it's a perfect idea yeah i think it's an awesome idea Whoever's idea it was Maybe it was yours I smoke too much weed If it was your idea Ninja zombies Ninja zombies

There's a movie right there A spot where we could just dump garbage Garbage Right into the hole of it Fly over in a helicopter And just drop it right into the What would happen? Well hopefully this

What is that thing called That's making a black hole Hopefully it turns into A really bad black hole And then we could just put the garbage down the black hole. The Large Hadron Collider, so we could litter in other galaxies? That's a terrible idea. That would be awesome.

All these Ewoks crying. You know they have hypernovas in space. They find these hypernovas that are basically these really super powerful novas that have these jets of energy spraying out in either direction. What if that was garbage? What if we got really close, we saw cans and shit and rubbers, and it turns out that all that shit spraying out

was the garbage of another dimension. They had figured out how to launch all of their garbage with a rocket ship into black holes. The planet's all clean. The planet's super clean. They all walk around with a portable connection to that black hole. I saw another thing that I see, and I'm going to report on this because this is number nine for me. This is the ninth time I've seen this.

A fucking guy in a Prius throwing a cigarette out the window. God damn, that drives me crazy. This motherfucker pulled into an organic foods parking lot or an organic food store, gets out of his Prius and throws his fucking cigarette on the ground. I'm like, you cunt. You dumb, dumb, dumb cunt. You stupid fuck.

What kind of a person goes so far to think they're helping the environment by buying a Prius? He had a ponytail on, so he's like, I'm living natural. I'm going to go get

some natural organic food and I'm just going to throw my cigarette right there. I think that was a king of the hill episode did it really do it king of the hill he started working at a whole foods and it was similar to that did he throw cigarettes out the window at whole foods they had priuses and they were they were just constantly contradicting themselves like yeah well it's people man i've seen nine times now nine times i've seen a guy in a Prius throw a cigarette

out the window. Nine. Over the course of my entire life, this is the ninth guy. I've been documenting them. The last one was in San Francisco.

The last one in San Francisco, I saw two in a weekend I was there. I was there Thursday through Sunday working at Cobb's and I saw two guys in their fucking Priuses

throw cigarettes out the window. That's incredible. It's incredible. You should videotape it. Put it on YouTube. You never know to have your fucking camera out. Like, there's a guy in a Prius.

Let's follow him. He's smoking. I know he's got this fuck. He's going to throw it out the fucking window. Gizmodo also has an article about LSD being used to treat what they call suicide headaches, which are people that have really bad headaches to the point where they almost want to kill themselves, like migraines times a billion, right? So these two psychiatrists have been giving LSD to these patients.

And I think they said like almost all the patients, all six patients reported a decrease in the number of cluster attacks, and five said this effect lasted for months after they had taken LSD. Well, if they had the right dosage of LSD, if you could administer it in a laboratory and you knew exactly what you were getting, there was an article really recently that said that MDMA, which is ecstasy, and LSD are far closer to being available for prescription

than anybody would really imagine. Really? Yeah, far closer. I tell you, man. For therapeutic use. That is one of the most beautiful drugs in the world. It's incredible. Molly, pure ecstasy or whatever it is.

I can't get enough of it. But what's weird is recently I bought some ecstasy, and I didn't feel the same of normal ecstasy feeling. And you came in talking like Roy Jones. Allegedly. And so I was telling this other guy I know, I'm like, hey, yeah, so I got this stuff It looked like Molly, but the guy said it was Ecstasy And it did this

This was my effects on it He goes, oh yeah, that's bath salts People are actually selling that as Ecstasy a lot in LA right now Oh, so you did that bath salt shit? You did that meth shit? Bath salt in the house You're retarded, man, you're just doing whatever people give you And what's funny is it felt it felt

like ecstasy like it started like oh okay here it goes i'm feeling good feeling it i guess i'm tired good night it was it almost got to the point so it got like euphoric and then euphoric body kind of feeling good kind of kind of like the ecstasy feeling but then it just fizzles off does every ecstasy have that that that next day blah feeling well i was using i was using on it labs.com's uh roll on and roll off so i had no feeling the next day i felt fine this is this stuff really works the on it stuff i gave that shit that uh the nootropic formula eddie you know we're making a brain pill oh i gotta talk about this we're making a brain pill we're making a nootropic no no I got to talk about this. We're making a brain pill. We're making a nootropic. No, no, no. Me and Chris Marcus, Chris Marcus doing all the work. I'm going to help promote it. But he started a laboratory when he left Fleshlight,

started a laboratory for, he's been on the podcast a bunch of times and twice. And he decided to come up with his own business. And one of them was that there's a bunch of different nootropics, a bunch of different like supplements that can aid in brain function and what he did is combine all the best ones and put them together dude they give you the craziest well that's when i had the arnold schwarzenegger arnold schwarzenegger dream my girlfriend i have been letting her have some of it nightmares really just intense nightmares and i didn't have nightmares but i had intense dreams yeah after, your girlfriend's terrified. After you said that,

I started actually realizing, oh, it's because of that. Is it like when you go to health food stores, they have like bottles of brain factors? No, they're not, well, it may be like that, but this is going to be much stronger. This stuff is like super. Larry had one called Brain Factors

and it had like ginkgo biloba and everything for the brain all in one formula. I don't know what his levels were and what stuff he had as opposed to what stuff Chris has had. I would like to look at the two of them. But whatever it is, this shit that Chris has put together, he's thoroughly researched this and come up with this incredible formula. It really fucking works.

First of all, the really freaky thing is, man, you don't get tired on this shit. That's the weird thing. Like, if I travel all the way across the country, you would figure by the time I get there five hours later, I'm exhausted, right? But when I take these fucking pills, man, we did a show on Friday, we flew a red eye, all right, landed Friday morning, I didn't sleep at all, I slept a little bit on the plane, I ate something, got in the shower, went to the UFC weigh-ins, went from the weigh-ins to got some food, ate food, worked over my material, went over some of my material, got with Joey, we smoked a joint, went on stage, then did our show.

Afterwards, went to hang out with Ralphie May. Afterwards, went to a strip club. Afterwards, came back to the hotel, and I'm still awake. I'm like, how the fuck am I awake? And then I realized, I took six of those fucking pills. Six? I took three earlier. Yeah, because I was exhausted.

I took three in the morning because i was exhausted i took three in the morning and then three like an hour before the show wow dog i was figuring some shit out man that the the crazy thing is when you have dreams the dreams are super vivid and you can remember them man it's because your mind's uh whatever receptor is awake something's awake that's usually not awake because that's like when we were talking about nicotine where it keeps your nicotine receptors in your head awake when you're on, you know, do a patch while you're sleeping. Whatever's in that shit

has something that it's reacting to and keeping it awake. Well, what I was impressed with is that I had some good ideas and I didn't want to get up and write them down and I actually remembered them. Oh, really? That never happens. Yeah. That never happens. I feel sharper definitely. I was going over that video. You know, there's that video. Have you seen it online of the Miss USA pageant?

Contestants they asking them about evolution. Yeah. Have you seen it? Yeah I saw pull that shit up cuz it's fucking fascinating Pull it up and we'll just we'll play a little bit of it because it's the most ridiculous shit ever They get these girls and all of them from the deep south all of them don't believe in evolution They're all like and what I don't believe in evolution, you're all like, well, I don't believe in evolution. And I'm thinking while I'm there, of course you don't believe in evolution. You're 20 years old. Nobody's ever caveman fucked you. Nobody ever gorilla fucked you. You don't know what darkness really is. You don't know that there's shades to man. There's a whole progression. There's a fucking spectrum of human behavior from really civilized and beautiful

and nice to barbaric and animalistic. And That shit's because we came from fucking animals, hooker. You just haven't experienced that yet in your little cute life with your sash on. I remembered it all vividly when I woke up in the morning. We don't really have to see it. It's really low-hanging fruit.

It's just really, really poor, dumb girls that are 20 years old and they're asking about evolution and they're asking about evolution. And they're saying things that they want people to hear. Well, I think Jesus put me here for a purpose because they think that all the people from their church and all the people back home, that's what they would want to hear. You know, when you're 20 years old and you're indoctrinated into the world of religion, what are the odds that you actually have a real opinion of it?

You actually sat down and sorted this shit out. Most of the time, they're just spitting out shit that other people have been saying to them their whole life. 20 years old? The fuck did you know when you were 20? Could you imagine if somebody had you on video talking about what you thought about the world when you were 20? I was an atheist at 20. You got to talk in the mic, bro.

I was an atheist at 20. Yeah. I have videos of me at 20 just smoking weed with a bunch of my friends. That's all I cared about was smoking weed and music. Yeah, well, you were stuck in Ohio too, man. What the fuck? You were in Columbus. What am I doing?

You're all over the place now. Your shit's blowing the fuck up, your 10th planets. Are you ever at home? Are you going out to a different city every week? Are you doing classes at all these places? Tell everybody what you're talking about, man. What you were talking about. You were saying 10th planet yeah jujitsu schools but you you have them all over the place how many do you have now around 30 wow and so you're traveling

pretty much every weekend do a seminar at one of them i'm trying to do two a month and for me vacation is staying in la staying home yeah i like I like being at my house. I love hanging with my bunny and my girlfriend. Just relaxing, go check out a movie. Just doing nothing. I love doing nothing at home. When you have a day

when you don't have to fucking be anywhere. So beautiful. I try to stay home two weekends out of the month. You know? That's why I quit the UFC as well. If I was trying to make it

to my schools and do the UFC, I'd be gone every weekend. Just can't do it. Well, that's good that your schools have become quite successful now. It's so funny. I see your shirt, your logo at all these places. I would be just sitting there going like, oh, my God, the guy has a 10th Planet shirt on.

And it makes me almost want to be like, hey, dude, what's up? I feel like, oh, they all know Eddie. Why don't you just take jiu-jitsu? I got Ari to do it for a year. Well, one, my knee. Two, time. Your knee, is that fucked up? It will pop out of place in jiu-jitsu, probably.

I'm not going to risk that. When was the last time it popped out of place? It only popped out once, and then once it was close popping out where it felt like it did. How long after your actual injury was this that it popped out? Three years, four years. Really? So it was pretty far afterwards. Yeah, yeah. So it's still fucked. it was pretty far afterwards. Yeah, yeah.

So it's still fucked. It was skiing too. And I was like, oh my God, did it just pop out to fucking hurt? Yeah. You got to develop

a higher tolerance to pain, son. I just don't have time for that shit. That's one thing you get from jujitsu, man. You get a high ass tolerance to pain because you're always in pain. You're always getting smashed. Your neck's getting choked.

Your face is getting smushed. You know, like when you get tattooed, like some people get tattooed and they fucking scream in agony. I fell asleep getting smushed. You know, like when you get tattooed, like some people get tattooed and they fucking scream in agony. I fell asleep getting tattooed once, literally knotted out. You get used to putting it out. You get used to putting pain.

And in any martial art, anytime you're hitting things and Muay Thai guys, man, you don't think they get accustomed to pain. Leg kicks always hurt, man. They're going to hurt forever. But you just get accustomed to that. You just deal with it. You know, your legs certainly toughen up, especially your, you know, your thighs toughen up and your shins really toughen up. They actually develop like little micro fractures

over the surface of your shin from clashing into other shins and kicking fucking banana trees and shit like that. Like those, those crazy Thai guys that are constantly kicking like banana trees, they develop like shins that are like weapons, man. You know, there's like a sports science on it where they showed Melcher. God, I forget the last his name. He's a Muay Thai guy, but he's a former world champion, and they had him kick baseball bats, and he was breaking baseball bats with his shins. Dude, dude, it was so crazy to watch.

Just swinging that leg kick into a baseball bat and snapping the handle off. Fuck that, dude. He did two different kinds. He did an ash one, an ash bat, and a maple bat. Because the ash bat apparently is a little easier, so then he moved to the maple one next. Oh, dude.

No, thank you. Yeah, that is... I'm grabbing my shins right now. There's such a difference in striking, the difference between striking and jiu-jitsu. I mean, you can get hurt in both of them for sure. Miguel Torres, former WBC bantamweight champion, posted a picture. Worst BJJ injury ever at my gym. And it's a dude's toe.

His toe got broken. Have you seen it? You have to see it. You need to look at it. A dude's toe got broken and snapped off and the bone was sticking straight out dude it was hardcore and i was like yeah that can happen man dudes can get fucked up but in striking you're much more likely to get roy jonesed in striking that shit is uh that shit's happening on a regular dudes are constantly getting brained you know there's constantly getting knocked out there was a post on the underground the other day.

Some guy was talking about getting knocked out in training and how much it pissed you off. Some new guy came in, didn't really know what he was doing, swang full blast, and he didn't get out of the way, and he got knocked unconscious. Fucking not good, man. When you watch something like Pat Barry and Czech Congo, does that shit register with you?

Do you see that and go, whoa, what's going on inside Pat Barry's head right now? And Czech Congo, as both of them got rained on. Yeah. For a fan, it was amazing, but I would never want to do that. I love watching it, though, but I'm not down for getting hit. It would be awesome if they could fix it. it though but i'm not down for getting hit it'd be awesome if they could fix it you know it's like you know if uh if you tear a knee ligament they can fucking get another ligament stick it in there

and screw it in place and they can fix you up nice you know if you like hurt your brain they go dude don't worry about it we're gonna put you in this chamber it rejuvenates all your brain cells and it's you know you're gonna be a hundred percent a couple weeks what if this chris marcus stuff actually does that i don't think so well what's it's going to be a lot more complicated than some herbs i think i would think that if there's going to be something that regenerates brain tissue that's injured it's going to be something like some nanotechnology something that rehabilitates or you know fixes tissue i should sponsor roy j Jones and see what happens. Oh. He's all speaking Shakespearean off the top of his head. This is spectacular.

He's not even willing to retire. He owes taxes, apparently. He owes $3.5 million in taxes, according to my online sources that I loosely and quickly Googled. How does someone with millions end up on? They don't pay, man. They don't fucking pay. They just don't have a business manager or an accountant? They just get stupid, man.

They get stupid. They get stupid. They just spend all that money, and they have some wacky motherfucker that's handling their money. Just like the kind of guy who would have a wacky motherfucker handling his hormones,

there's a guy that would have a wacky motherfucker handling his money, and that guy tells you, like Wesley Snipes' dude told him, you know, hey, you don't have to pay taxes, man. That shit is unconstitutional. Look, I'll show you the clauses, man.

They ain't even gonna come after you because they don't want anybody to know about this. And they're like, oh yeah, no, they're gonna come after you and you're gonna have to go to jail

for a few years. You know, you're a movie star and all of a sudden you're in jail. He's still in jail? Yeah, man. He's in jail right now.

He's in jail right now. He's gonna be in jail for three years. They want to let people know, hey, we will lock you in a fucking cage, stupid. You need to pay us, and you need to let everybody know that you're paying, and let everybody know that they need to pay.

We all need money to make this fucking thing work. Cops don't work for free. It's not free to fix the highways. We need fucking money. Even if you don't agree with it, even if it's too much, and I agree it is, it's definitely too much.

You got to pay that shit anyway, son. That put you in a fucking cage, right, Brian? Yeah. Didn't you have some tax problems? I still do. What's your tax problems? Now the state's coming after me. What did you do?

I used TurboTax and blindly was like, oh, I have receipts for all this shit, thinking that I would just use my credit card statements. And then I didn't know that credit card statements only go back now like a year. Like if you want to go back in time and look at a statement or something like that, they don't let you go any farther than a year. You can't even find them? No. Really? No, no.

Whoa. So I didn't know that. So I was doing my taxes thinking like, oh, yeah, you know, I got proof of purchase, you know, on my statements. What is that? Like the bank getting together with the fucking absolutely tax people do you think that they conspired they're like this is funny a lot of people out of money man we can get a lot more money that way yeah all these assholes claiming deductibles and shit yeah it's stressful stuff man I've

had a business manager now three years and it relieves so much stress I don't think about shit. If the government came after me, I got all that shit under control. Well, now I just don't do it. Even though I should be writing all this shit off that I do and stuff like that, now I'm just like, you know what, fuck it. I will just do like I do.

Why don't you go to like H&R Block? Because it's like $1,000 or something like that. I don't want to do that shit. Is it $1,000? No, it's a couple hundred bucks, man. Really? H&R Block. I was doing that before I got my business manager.

My girl right now just paid something like $700 at H&R Block to do her taxes. Really? Maybe he just robbed her. Maybe he's like, look at this bitch. I'm going to get her to give me a lot of money. Yeah. I mean, to me, I'd rather, you know,

I hate taxes so much, so I'd rather just go to TurboTax, take 10 minutes and do it, and get it sent away, you know, than having to pay extra and try to find money and do all that crap, which I should do. You need an accountant, man. Yeah, I do. You gotta get one.

It's all so goddamn fucking complicated. It's too stressful to think about that shit. It is so fucking complicated, isn't it? Yo, when my movie drops, I'll go get me an accountant. When your movie drops? Yeah, yeah, yeah. What are you gonna do in the movie? Porn.

Hmm. First person. Does not work any money in porn anymore, dude. You gotta come up With another strategy That strategy would've been The shit in 1993 You could've been Like Peter North

Peter North drives a Ferrari And he did gay porn Yeah How about that How about that He's the only one That got away with doing gay porn He did gay porn

And they're like Alright don't do it again And then he came back And did regular porn From then on out But he did a little gay porn I didn't believe it Like people told me

I was like, no way. Not Peter, man. No way, dude. You know? Because if you're going to have a porn idol, that's the one to have. You know? Dude shoots these giant monster loads.

But then you go and find some videos online of a dude sucking his cock. And you're like, hey, hey, hey. And this dude's boning him in the ass. And you're like, hey, hey, hey. And he tried to say there was like a body double. Son, there ain't no CGI that good.

Did we talk about the Hungriest Butt Award? Yeah. Did we talk about that already? Yeah. We did? Yeah. We talked about it on stage.

I think the second time that you came on. Oh, we did? Really? Yeah. We talked about it on the podcast? Yeah, second time. That is a crazy story.

That's a good story. It is a good story. The quick version of it is that a friend of ours don't say his name we won't say it we didn't do that I think we did

a friend of ours no we didn't we never did how dare you a friend of ours was running a small mixed martial arts corporation and he found

they did an internet search on one of their fighters and they found out that he had won the hungriest butt award and then they googled him there was no google back then this is like the 90s they found some online pictures of him with two dudes treating him like chinese finger how many dicks in your ass do you have to get to get that in that in a year to get that award

like i think it's the criteria it's's a lot of awards are fake anyways. I think it's just what they called a video to sell it. How much money did you give? I don't think there was really like an award show. No, I think he won like AVN. It was AVN Hungriest Butt or something. I think it was the name of a video, the Hungriest Butt Awards or something like that.

It wasn't an actual award that he won? I don't know. I mean, look, we could give out an award for the Hungriest Butt. Porn awards are fake, by the way. Brian wins it, you know. They are. You're in the business. Hey, do you know who the Helio Gracie of gay porn is?

Like, who is the master of, like, who just crushes everybody? Who's the Kelly Slater? For guy gay porn? For gay porn. I don't know anything about guy gay porn. There must be. There must be a Jenna Jameson of gay porn, right? Right, that's fine.

The master of gay porn. Number one male gay porn star. We shouldn Jameson of gay porn, right? Like the master of gay porn. Number one male gay porn star. We shouldn't even be Googling this. This probably puts you on a list. Yeah, right? Male gay porn star. Is there a guy that just stands head and shoulders above everyone else? I don't know.

I don't know. Maybe Twitter would know. I bet if we asked Twitter, Dear Twitter, what is the number one gay male porn star in the world? Is there a Michael Jordan of gay porn? I will read off the first answer. Probably not. You don't think so?

No. I think there's so many, I don't know. I just don't think porn... There's always some Lance Armstrong type motherfucker that figures things out that other people can't. Just rises to the top and becomes famous at a genre where no one else is getting famous. Is there gay gangbangs?

Is there a dude who went to 50 dudes? Do they DP or triple P in the butthole? Do they do that? Why are you asking me? I only watch the double. Brent Corrigan, or this is a woman rather, Ampers, and she says it's

Brent Corrigan that might be her ex-boyfriend. Let's see. Oh yeah, might be her ex-boyfriend. This fucking clown. I'm going to get him on the Joe Rogan podcast. Okay, let's see. He's a male modern

gay pornograph best known for his stage name. There he is. A little fella. What's so special about him? pornograph best known for his stage name hmm yep there he is a little fellow it was already best known for his roles in schoolboy crush uh and velvet mafia he has won six gay vn they have the gavians instead of avians gavian awards including best bottom award two consecutive years do they count the butthole or are they just talking about the shape of the butt?

Best bottom is you being on the bottom taking in the ass. Oh, best bottom. Yeah. They wouldn't say bottom instead of butthole. Jesus Christ. They're pretty open about how they feel. Imagine the after party.

I love his bottom. No, they'd say his asshole. What's the record for gay gangbangs? That's a good question. Is it? What the fuck, Brian? This guy's been in a lot of goddamn movies. Alright, let's find out. What would we

say? Gay gangbang record? Yeah. Gangbang record. Let's see. Grease holds the record for the biggest gay gangbang. Grease the movie? No. That's probably a dude.

This was 780 men. They crush us, regular chicks. Yeah, going nuts on ass, butt, suckers. Wow, 780 men. But not one dude, right? Yeah, just one dude. God damn it. Dude, one dude, right? Yeah. What about one dude? Yeah, just one dude. God damn it.

Dude, I believe they got to crush women because the women are doing like 50, maybe 100 is the record, right? But women have vaginas that are probably more adorable than buttholes. I think the problem is finding these guys that get in line and film it, gay guys, finding that would be hard because it's 10% of the population. It would be hard. But if the numbers weren't a problem, they're willing to ship people in, I think gay porn would crush regular porn and gangbangs. Wow, listen to this, though, man.

Listen to this shit. The most ejaculatory orgasms ever recorded in one hour for a man is 16. 16. In one hour? Orgasms recorded in one hour for a man. Dude, who's that guy? Minus four. The furthest a woman has ever been recorded to ejaculate was 9 feet 29 inches.

Why would it be 9 feet 29 inches? She squirted. 12 inches is a foot. That's stupid. Oh. That doesn't make any sense. A guy came 16 times in an hour? Why does it say 9 feet 29 inches?

Oh. It says 3 meters. Okay. Is that... 3 meters is just 9 feet, right? Isn't it? No, there's 3 feet per meter. Right. Roughly.

Right, so 3 meters is 9 feet. So why is it 9 feet 29 inches? That doesn't make any sense if 12 inches is a foot. Anyway, whatever the fuck this says. The greatest distance ever attained for a jet of semen that has ever been recorded is 18 feet 9 inches.

That's huge. Wow. That had to be Lexington Steel. Horst Schultz. That's the guy's name that shot a load that went 18 feet in the air. That's incredible. Up in the air or across? Either way is fantastic.

It's got to be a distance. No way it could be straight up. Dude, 18 feet is ridiculous. That's incredible. He must have an arc to it, a nice arc, like a McDonald's sign type thing going on. St. Louis. For 18 feet. Did they video it?

I don't know. They must have. I mean, these are all world records. This is the top 10 sex world records. It's on Believe It or Not. The average speed of a man's loads, what would you say your average speed of your loads would be? Like 35 miles an hour.

What do you think, Brian? 82. 28 miles an hour. 28 miles an hour. So you're pretty close. That's pretty close. Do you think if your car drove by, you could tell the difference between a car going 28 miles an hour

and 35 miles an hour? That's pretty fucking close. Having swallowed the most amount of semen ever officially recorded, Michelle Monaghan had 1.7 pints of semen pumped out of her stomach in Los Angeles in July of 1991. Was it pumped out through her ass? That'd be awesome. Dude, 1.7 pints.

But maybe if she had a glass of coconut water, C2O, very delicious, right before, and it mixed in with the loads. Maybe it might have increased the size of the quantity of fluid in her. You know, when she threw up, maybe she was throwing up loads and a Sprite. You don't know, right? Right? What, are they going to test it?

Make sure it's 100% loads? No, they just looked at it and waited. And a slice of pizza. You wouldn't know the difference. Yeah, she just came into one of those big glass baking measurement cups. She just threw up in it. And it was 1.7. The fuck is this podcast comedy?

I don't know. The female gangbang record is owned by a woman named Houston who had intercourse with 620 men. I think that's been beat. Yeah, that's been beat by then. This is some old ass information. 600 guys? Yeah.

That's old. That's a lot. I don't think it really is 600 men, though. I think what they do is they do the same guys and they keep rotating them. And they consider that a different guy each time. Yeah. It's the guy they like. They come and then they come back.

That doesn't count. That's why that's not the real records. Like, who made those records? The same people. So if a girl fucks two dudes and they switch off a couple times, she can say she fucked 15 guys? Right. This doesn't even have gay. It has male gangbang male gangbang world record goes to porn star john doe who

worked himself over 55 women in one day he had five to six ejaculations that's pretty good well yeah 50 chicks meanwhile that guy committed suicide that guy blew his fucking brains out i have four ejaculations the other day within an hour. Yeah, but all of them were like little teardrops. That's incredible. It's funny. Most of them came from your eyes.

I lose the... It becomes really thick and clumpy. Like it's not hatched yet. I'm coming. He counts it when he cries. I'm coming. I'm coming. Was this masturbation?

I'm coming on you with my tears. You fucking bitch. Real sex. Were you on ecstasy? No. You weren't on ecstasy? No, I just have a hot girlfriend that makes me have boners all day. Are you bragging, bro?

No, I'm just saying that literally I can have sex nonstop all day. Did you hear bragging in the air? That first time in my life. What's that smell? That's incredible. It's great. Do you believe him? That's hard to believe.

I don't know anybody like that. That's right, I got it. It's possible. It's all. Do you believe him? That's hard to believe. I don't know anybody like that. That's right, I got it. It's possible. It's all possible, dude. If you were like some super alpha Quentin Jackson looking motherfucker, I might buy it. I might believe it. But maybe all your testosterone is just stored up in your balls. And your body doesn't use any of it for muscle development or behavior or any of that shit.

It's all just in your balls ready to shoot. Seriously, two minutes, like a any of that shit. It's all just in your balls, ready to shoot. Seriously, two minutes, like a minute after I come, if I look at this, Boner comes right back. Just put your fucking pictures of your girlfriend away.

For real? You're making me sad. Seriously. It never goes away. I just have, for the first time in my life, my Boner never goes down. I just can't.

You know why he's saying this? Because he knows his ex-girlfriend listens to the podcast. That's not why. I swear to God, that's not why. You couldn't do that to Taylor? Where's Joey Diaz right now? You couldn't. You know why he's saying this? Because he knows his ex-girlfriend listens to the podcast. That's not why. I swear to God, it's not why. You couldn't do that to Taylor? Where's Joey Diaz right now? You couldn't do that to Taylor?

Where's Taylor Vixen? All day? Oh, God. No. No. It's a different thing, right, Brian? It's different. It's love this time.

You never find. Doom, doom, doom, doom. Whoa, what the fuck are you doing, man? Tech guy. Oh, it's so hot in here. That's pretty doing, man? Tech guy. Oh, it's so hot in here. That's pretty impressive, man. It really is. Yeah, well, I just thought it was weird

because I never thought it was possible in my life. Like, I've always wondered how, like, guys in porn do it and stuff like that. She's sneaking some Viagra in your drink, son. It might be because, like, I've already said that. I think she's, like, doing that. Do you think she's sneaking it in there? Maybe she got tired of you.

Like, remember you say you would fall asleep Because you were too tired to go down on her and then fall asleep Because you were too tired to do anything You'd do her and then you'd fall asleep You talked about it on the podcast Not her Yes you did My current girlfriend

Yes you did What'd I say? You said she was horny and you were too tired to have sex with her So you would go down on her No that was one time That was one time One time One time

Maybe that time she's like I I'm tired of this shit. I want to get fucked. And so she started crumpling up Viagra. I'm going to cook for you tonight, honey. She made you a nice Viagra meatloaf. In like 2001, I got third row tickets to The Cure. I was so jazzed. Remember Born Again, that stripper?

Sure. It was a long time ago. He just dated a stripper that was a Born Again Christian, so he would call her Born Again. Yeah, that was her nickname, Born Again. It's a long time ago. We were going. She was a stripper that was a born again Christian so you'd call her born again. Yeah, that was her nickname, born again. That's hilarious. So anyways,

she was only stripping just to pay for school but she was like hardcore Christian. It was ridiculous. It was ridiculous. But we were going to the Cure so I'm like,

I need some ecstasy for this concert. So I meet up with my buddy in the afternoon to get some ecstasy and I always have vitamin I meet up with my buddy in the afternoon to get some ecstasy and I always have vitamin bottles with me and I put them in my vitamin bottles and I go when I eat I'm going to take them out of the vitamin bottle and you know eat and take my vitamins. It's one o'clock I go to El Pollo Loco we're sitting we're going to leave around seven. I eat my chicken

sitting there watching TV and I just got really horny. I just looked at her and I'm like, I'm a fucking beast. Fuck this chick. So I threw her in the bed. I'm fucking the shit out of her. I'm like, God damn. It feels like I'm on ecstasy.

And I go, oh my God. I jumped off the bed, went, opened up my vitamin bottle. I was like, fuck. Are you fucking serious? I took two hits of ecstasy. I took hers too. I forgot to pull them out of my vitamins.

I didn't know I was on ecstasy until right in the middle of sex. That's hilarious. It was incredible sex. I'm like, it's like I'm on E, man. That's funny. I flew off that bed. I thought that E is supposed to kill your boner. Didn't you say that you would take Viagra and E together? Because you would call it fuck to see.

After a while. After a while, it kills your boner. But not in the beginning. In the beginning, you get really, really horny. But if you want to go. E? Because when you're on E, yeah. Well, people are different.

No, no, people are different. Like for me, if, you know, back in the days when every now and then I'd pop an E pill, I would get a boner really quick. How many times have you done E in your life? How many times? Man, back when I was younger, I probably did E maybe 40 times. Whoa. Oh, my God.

Is that a lot? That explains a lot, dude. That explains a lot. What do you mean it explains a lot? It was when I was younger. This motherfucker is taking shit he doesn't even know what it is. He's taking bath salts. Yeah.

You got to get your shit from reputable sources. You need to find some friendly person that works at a club somewhere. But ecstasy is bad, okay? I don't. It kills your brain. It for sure does. Pure ecstasy is not bad. The MDMA.

The problem is is that you don't know what you're taking yeah bath salt boy shit exactly that stuff's supposed to be really

have you seen this crocodile shit the shit that they're taking in the Soviet Union they're shooting it up and it's making your skin rot away there's all these

photos of people with their bones hanging off literally your bones exposed from wherever they shot it up like their flesh has deteriorated

to the point where their bones are exposed. It's crazy to look at, man. It's gross. What a weird world we live in, man. People will take some drug that will make your skin literally rot off your body. People will take some shit

that they think is ecstasy and it turns out to be some weird fucking amphetamine that somebody made in the lab. Who knows what the fuck it's going to do to you. And it's not the end. They're going to keep coming up with more and more of these things. Kill off the dummies.

Yeah, these bath salts. That's you, bro. You took that shit. Does that scare you when you think of that? No. That you could have taken something really nutty? No. When you buy stuff like that, if you buy ecstasy, doesn't that scare you?

You never know. You might get it from some dude. Yeah, it is scary. Have you heard about this cocaine that's making people's fucking flesh rot have you heard about this shit no there's some cocaine there's bad cocaine that's in california it's in new york and it's uh treated with some livestock dewormer that's what they cut it with and you know let me look it up right now because it's fucking crazy are you serious? Yeah.

Yeah, it's cocaine, bad cocaine in Los Angeles and New York City, tainted with some sort of a, here it is, a livestock dewormer. Yeah, it's really fucked up. And what happens to you when you do it? They're getting really bad noses, ears, and cheeks develop ugly purple swatches of dead skin. This is like, it's called Levamisole. That's the stuff. And the dealers are cutting it with this shit.

And they say like 90% of the cocaine in New York and California is contaminated with this shit. 90% of the cocaine in California. Excuse me, 70%. The U.S. Department of Justice is reporting this. Okay, by the way, this 70%. The U.S. Department of Justice is reporting this. Okay, by the way, this is just the U.S. Department of Justice. They might just be saying this to cut out the cocaine business. They're saying up to 70% of the cocaine in the U.S. is contaminated with this lavamisol,

which is cheap and widely available and commonly used for deworming livestock. Whoa. What the fuck, man? What are they doing? You would think that that would be something that someone who hates cocaine users would do. You would think that that would be someone

who actually wants to stop people from using cocaine. They would mix it in there so that people would stop coming back. You know what I'm saying? Why would you do that if you're trying to sell more cocaine? That almost seems like something the government would do, man. Sounds like the whole story's probably fake, and they're just putting it out there to scare you, like people on Pirate Bay, like, oh, there's a virus in this file.

I don't know. Maybe, but it's on LA Weekly. Seems like they would do their due diligence, don't you think? Yeah. LA Weekly, definitely. Don't you think? Yeah. You fell asleep on me, you motherfucker. No, I'm just... You're thinking about your girlfriend's ass right now. I just said LA Weekly. Yeah, definitely. What do you think? Yeah. You fell asleep on me, you motherfucker.

No, I'm just... You're thinking about your girlfriend's ass right now. No, I just said LA Weekly. Yeah, definitely. What do you think, Eddie? Do you think that they would do this? Who the fuck would do this? Do you think this is the government?

Who knows? Do you see the UFO videos over London? Do you believe in those? Did you see that? I saw... What does that look like to you? I just... There's so many videos like that.

It looks like CGI to me. It's too convenient. The way it's set set up is too convenient there's a bunch of people standing there looking up and everybody's looking up and they're catching these things and they fly in and out of the clouds i've seen it but you know what really makes me think that it's it's uh too convenient the guy film looks up films some of the ufos and then looks down at all these people watching which is the fucking last thing that you would do if you actually thought you saw real UFOs flying through the air. You would keep the fucking camera on them.

You wouldn't want to turn it and point it down at all these people watching. Maybe. Maybe you don't know what the hell it is. Like, look, everyone's tripping out. Yeah, but he showed that before. He showed everybody looking up at the sky, and then he catches this. So then he catches this.

Actors? Yeah, I think it's fake. People get a kick they were all actors? Yeah, I think it's fake. People get a kick out of doing shit like that. They think it's cute. So much fake shit on the internet now. That's one of the fun things about the internet, trying to figure out what's fake and what's not. Brian's the master at that shit. He calls fakes.

He calls fakes better than anybody. But sometimes he's off. Sometimes it's just sound sync problems, and it looks fake. Look at this cocaine shit. Look at what it's doing to these people. It's making their skin rot off.

It's like making their ear turn like blue and black. Your skin's fucking falling off. That's from cocaine? Yep. Oh my God. Yeah.

Some people have suffered permanent scarring on their body from this shit. I got the good shit. Make your nose fall off. This message is brought to you by Prescription Pills.

What is that shit? What's it called? It's called Levamisole. Levamisole? Yeah. L-E-V-A-M-I-S-O-L-E. Levamisole. It's bad for you, kids.

And on that note, I think this fucking podcast started off real strong. And then somewhere or another, we lost a lot of steam. We got into gay porn. It's always after two hours. It was my fault. We got into gay porn. It's always after two hours. It was my fault. We got into gay porn, and Brian started reminiscing about his girlfriend. Aw, look at her pictures. Tomorrow, somebody, I'm not sure, somebody will be on the podcast.

The guy from Ancient Aliens is coming on the podcast, and he's coming on at the end of July. It'll be July 27th. And his name is Giorgio, and this is a tough one to pronounce, T-S-O-U-K-A-L-O-S. I think the T is silent. Yeah. Tsoukalos. Tsoukalos, maybe?

Tsoukalos? Giorgio Tsoukalos. And he's the guy from Ancient Aliens with the crazy hair who's a self-professed wacky alien loving bastard because that's what I called him and he said

yes guilty as charged he's cool as fuck I like him and I'm excited to have him on because we're going to talk about some weird shit

you should probably be in on that one man I would love to ask some questions yeah you should probably be in on that one that would be a fun conversation

July 27th yeah we might have to bring you in on that one we might have to bring Eddie Bravo in with the alien dude i would be honored yeah because no one loves aliens more than you and him you and him together would be a fucking oh yeah we fuck people up tsunami of alien love don't you have like aliens all over your logos and you're

sure i don't necessarily believe in them i don't have any aliens in my logos well my whole logo is an alien and flying saucers and aliens are assholes i'm down i'd love i love you have more ufo dvds than i do sure you have like 200 of them i've got everything that but that's why i don't believe in them i i've seen so much stuff i think the way i look at it and this is not not that i don't believe in them because it's not that i don't believe in them i don't not believe i don't believe ufos don't exist i don't believe that my my mind is open about it but i'm not convinced either way but the way i look at it is like everyone's got a goddamn camera with a on their phone everyone does now you would think that if there if i meet a thousand people okay out of every thousand people

that i meet at least 10 of them are fucking morons like extreme morons right if you meet a thousand wouldn't you say 10 are just complete idiots at least pathological liars completely fucked up right a good solid 10 right so i would think that if there's that many people that are idiots and fucked up and then you look at the number of ufo stories like what are the numbers the numbers like are similar to what you would expect from a population of retards like a small population you look at the smartest people in the planet you look at the smartest people on the opposite end of the spectrum warner von braun and herman obert there were rocket scientists they not only believe in aliens they're saying our technology came from messages from beans from other solar systems. That's what they're saying. Yeah, I would have to talk to them.

That's what they're saying. I believe that. You can get a quote. Go Warner Von Braun quote beans from UFO, beans from other worlds. His exact quote is beans from other worlds helped us. Yeah, I've seen that. I've seen that written,

but who knows what that really is what he said. It's so hard when a dude's dead and he died in 1977. You know, who the fuck knows what he actually said, you know? Well, you know, he's quoted as saying it, so. Maybe. Yeah, maybe, but.

Yeah. Two different guys? No, I think, look, it is entirely possible. If it's proven that the quote was actually legit, like, yes, here's the video of him actually saying it, then what happens at that point? That's pretty convincing evidence. Maybe.

Or maybe he's a troll. Maybe Wernher von Braun is a big Nazi troll. I mean, the thing about Wernher von Braun is he was the head of Nazi, of NASA, rather, but he was a confirmed Nazi. And the Simon Wiesenthal Center said if that guy was alive today, they would prosecute him for crimes against humanity.

So, who the fuck knows? He could have been trolling. But, I don't believe that it's impossible. It's definitely possible. So I'm looking forward to having this Giorgio dude on. It should be a fascinating conversation. I want to find out how his brain works, man. Because he says a lot of crazy stuff. I want to know.

He seems almost like he could be a character. Maybe a little bit. Maybe. Maybe it's fun. Maybe some of it's sexy. Sexy? Yeah, it's sexy. It's sexy to believe in Bigfoot.

It's sexy to believe in aliens. It's sexy to believe in all that shit. It's interesting. Who the fuck knows? But that's coming up. I don't know who's going to be on tomorrow, but we'll get somebody. And then maybe Thursday is going to be my friend Jan Ervin. You know Jan, the dude who wrote all the books

on mushrooms and religion. The problem is he's got the flu, and I don't want the fucking flu. Let's give him a couple weeks. He's the guy that turned you on to Terrence McKenna. Yeah, he turned me on to a lot of things. He's a fascinating cat. He's a real odd duck.

And he's written two books now on psychedelics and religion. And he was with us when we first did DMT, right? He was with us when you had that crazy bad trip. The first one was horrible. Yeah, it was pretty bad. Screaming and yelling. Eddie fucked up and he ate food right

before he went on his trip, which you're never supposed to do. You're not supposed to have anything in your stomach when you go on the trip because your body kind of freaks out. So he, in the middle of this trip, which you're never supposed to do. You're not supposed to have anything in your stomach when you go on the trip because your body kind of freaks out. So he, in the middle of this trip, gets up and I have to help him get to the sink and he threw up in the sink. You hurled in the sink. Didn't I throw up all over the floor?

No, no, no. You made it to the sink. You made it to the sink. You don't even remember the story that could, right? It's probably really... I don't remember where I threw up. I just don't remember exactly. I thought it was Edie Bergel the whole time too.

I was like, wow, Joe's hanging out with edie bergel because when whoever wrote this whole story on your message board didn't put eddie bravo right that was yawn yeah yawn changed the names of everything yeah and i thought it was edie bergel and i'm like why did you change it was a johnny rotten i think it was johnny rotten maybe it was either yawn or johnny rotten changed the names of everything in the sink in your little bar right yeah yeah yeah that's what you threw up yeah And then I looked up at you and I remember, because I was screaming, and I looked up at you and I'm like,

I'm alright, don't worry about me. That was like me letting you know, just let me fucking throw up, let me scream, I'm going to be fine. Well, the thing about bad trips is the real bad trips happen when you're trying to control the experience. The whole idea is to just let go and let this journey happen. You've got to trust in the psychedelic, but you were fighting to control the experience. The whole idea is to just let go and let this journey happen.

You've got to trust in the psychedelic, but you were fighting it tooth and claw, and it was ugly. That first time was a disaster. Shazam. This Friday night, July 1st, we will all be in Las Vegas, Brian included.

So if you want to hug Brian, come on down. We met this dude who had a fucking Death Squad tattoo, your little logo. This guy had a tattoo I think there's four people now with it that's crazy and

there's a few that have the higher primary tattoos too and there's a bunch of how many 10th planet tattoos are there now there's a bunch man that's not ridiculous we're causing people to

get ink on their skin burning people's skin no we're not the death squad tattoo is awesome man making it prettier this Friday night we will all be at Mandalay Bay

it's going to be Joey Diaz Ari Shafir me and Doug Benson is goingalay Bay. It's going to be Joey Diaz, Ari Shafir, me, and Doug Benson's going to stop by. He's going to do a guest set. And Brian, if we get him drunk enough, we might push him in front of the microphone. I'm going to push you on at the end, the very end. You're going to come out and talk to the crowd,

do some Q&A, some Q&A when you're on acid. So that's this Friday night. And then next weekend, we are in Irvine at the Irvine Improv. And that should be fun as fuck. That is, yeah, Irvine is great. That is, the Irvine weekend is the 7th, 8th, or the 8th, 9th, and 10th of July. So that's it, bitches.

Thanks for tuning in, everybody. And we will see you all tomorrow. Thank you. And thanks to the Fleshlight. Can I? Yeah, yeah. Oh. Sure. If you go to JoeRogan tomorrow. Thank you. And thanks to the Fleshlight. Can I? Yeah, yeah, sure. If you go to joerogan.net,

click on the link for the Fleshlight, enter in the code name ROGAN, you get 15% off the number one sex toy for men. Go ahead, fella. Shoot some loads in it knowing that you have saved a couple dollars. I got a seminar in El Paso, Texas,

July 23rd, I think. That shit's right close to the border, right? And next week is the 10th Planet Cruise. I don't know if it's too late, but we're going on a cruise, man. What is this? Pacific Ocean. Next Monday to Friday.

Holy shit. Where do you start? Where does it start? I think LA. I don't know too much about it because- Who's organized it? Donna and Amy from Legends. They put it all together.

Wow. We got 70 guys going. 70 guys. What are the chances dudes are going to buttfuck each other? A lot of people are bringing their wives, actually. A lot of people are bringing their wives and their girlfriends. That cuts down a little. Still 50 guys. So that's next Monday.

I'm not sure, again, if it's too late or not, but if you go to 10thplanetjj.com on the forum, there's information up there. And also 10thplanetcruise.com. Dude, that sounds fucking awesome. That's going to be fun, man. You scared that anybody might freak out that someone taps somebody and then they just throw them overboard? Can you imagine being on that cruise with your wife?

Like, hey, happy anniversary. Oh, what the fuck is going on here? 70 train killers. I'm going to teach a seminar. Danny's going to teach seminars. On the boat. On the boat. God damn it.

We're going to have seminars on the boat. It's like the Gracie thing. We didn't invent this. The Gracies. Oh, the Gracies do a Gracie cruise? Yep. Danny's going to teach seminars. On the boat. On the boat. God damn. We're going to have seminars on the boat. It's like the Gracie thing. We didn't invent this. The Gracie's. Oh, the Gracie's do a Gracie cruise? Yep. They have a Gracie cruise. Wow.

We need to do a death squad cruise. How cool would that be? Yeah, I don't want to go on a boat and be stuck, be scared. What if there's some weirdos on the boat and they know where your cabin is and knock on the door? Eddie, can I win a little bit of a card from the master? You've got to get the VIP suite. Oh, VIP suite.

All right, folks. Thank you, Mr. Bravo. Thank you. Follow Eddie on Twitter. Eddie Bravo on it. Eddie, can I, I want to learn the love of art from you, master. You gotta get the VIP suite. Oh, VIP suite. All right, folks. Thank you, Mr. Bravo. Thank you. Follow Eddie on Twitter. Eddie Bravo on Twitter. E-D-D-I-E. Bravo. Just how it's spelled.

You know how it works. Brian is Red Band and you can also subscribe to the Death Squad series of podcasts that Brian hosts on iTunes. It's called Death Squad

and it's Sam Tripoli's podcast, Tom Segura's podcast, Ari Shafir's podcast, and a bunch of other different ones every now and then. They're throwing in new ones into the mix, but they're very entertaining

and fun, especially if you're into liquid ass and people sticking fingers in other people's fleshlights. Thank you, everybody. See you tomorrow. Holla.