The Joe Rogan Experience - #1332 - Annie Lederman

Episode Date: August 7, 2019

Annie Lederman is a stand up comedian. She is also the host of "MEANSPIRATION" podcast on Spotify.

hmm hello Annie hello the leopard theme you have leopard jackets today you have a leopard top is this just coincidental or is there something to this well I'm a little bit white trash and I want everyone no I don't know I I liked I liked married with children you can pull this up you don't have to I'm a little bit uh I know I'm trying to get comfortable. Are you comfortable? I don't know. Am I? I'm nervous. You seem comfortable. Am I supposed to be not nervous?

You're fine. I'm with the king. Anyway, okay. So Leopard. Leopard. I like Married with Children. I don't know. You like Married with Children?

Peg Bundy? Well, I was going to go for Kelly, but thank you. I like Dumb and Slutty. No. I do have my friend who started pegging her boyfriend in my phone as Peg Bundy. Whoa. That's her name. She started pegging her boyfriend.

She got a new boyfriend. Whose idea? His. I think he's gay, honestly. For sure. Listen, if you get pegged, I'm not saying you're gay for sure, but this guy. This guy's gay. This guy, I think, is gay.

And what does she think? They broke up. She thinks he's gay. Oh, Jesus Christ., is gay. And what does she think? They broke up. She thinks he's gay. Oh, Jesus Christ. They broke up. Why did they break up? He was emotionally unavailable because he's gay. Wow.

I think he's looking for something with a dick. So, was there other signs? With him that he might be... I don't know. I think that he just was not... Maybe he's just an emotionally unavailable guy, but he seemed to have a lot of issues around wanting to get dicks in his house. So it seems like maybe he needs to try maybe a less plastic one.

Yeah. Well, he probably is already trying it, don't you think? Maybe. I mean, I don't think he just... Why would you waste your time with a rubber dick strapped to a woman if you could just go get maybe jesus jesus made some christian stuff like you just can't oh yeah i don't take the real dick yeah maybe it's like internalized homophobia probably or maybe he's just like transitionary like maybe two years now he'll look back and go god i used to make girls fuck me in the ass i'm

such a dickhead why did i do that i should have just come out yeah or maybe he likes the feminine aspects of a woman and the rock hard cock part of a dude there's a lot of people that like that he needs to get there needs to be like uh well i guess that's what uh he needs a hermaphrodite yes well whitney cummings was telling me that those sex robots, you know, you saw her special with the menisex robot, that they're really popular where they have a woman's body and a dick. Those ones are really popular. All right.

All right. That's a good answer. You get to live your... You're just greedy. You just want everything. Inside, outside, give it to me. I had a guy call into my podcast about his wife won't peg him enough and he's a cuck but she won't yeah but she like she like she like

makes love to him while she pegs him and he wants to be just destroyed you know jesus christ and he he's a cuck but he she won't fuck black guys so he's just he's like i'm like i feel like for what you want you should be very grateful you have this woman that's pretty down but there's always more so i'm wondering if he just wants more or if it's all the same with but just that's how it is with people if you go back to the early days of porn it was basically just pizza delivery men and sorority girls and and sex and everybody had a bush but then you look at today everyone's gagging and slapping and choking and spitting and not choking on pubes and it's there was none of that back then now it's

like standard you know it's like everything keeps getting pushed boundaries keep getting pushed everyone's getting the fish hook poor aziz it's fucking. Aziz watched the wrong porn. Aziz? Remember when he got in trouble? Yeah. What a disaster. Have you seen a special? I haven't watched it yet. I watched a clip and it shot so bad.

It's like you see him and then you see people behind him in the backstage area milling around. And he's on a seat it's so dumb it's like there's there's doors open in the back and then people walking behind the doors it's like some odd artistic choice to try to be like it doesn't matter that i'm up here yeah like it's no big deal life still goes on even though i'm up here which means you were thinking that life doesn't go on and you wanted to show people that life goes on dude that's deep you were you were insecure about how narcissistic you are and then you tried to fight it well i was thinking it was the director's choice or was the director who was the director was it spike jones yeah i think he tried to do something

crafty which you know is kind of interesting in any other format i mean it'd be interesting if it was a conversation it was just uh you know two people talking and they're in a public square and you see people milling around behind them. That's not distracting. But with stand-up, the more things you have to think about other than what the person's saying, the more it's going to take away from what the person's saying. Yeah, it does feel weird to just – I mean, I go on with the leopard print jacket sometimes, but I like to dig myself a little hole. Yeah, but the leopard print jacket is just cool. It's just funny. It's not distracting.

It's just here she is. I like, you know, I have my toy sword. I don't know if you've been around for any of those sets. You have a toy sword? Sometimes I bring one on. You know, it's late at night. You got to wake them up. You got to wake them up.

Like a buccaneer sword? Just a plastic sword from the toy store. I spend a lot of time with props. i have fake blood on me most times i don't know when there's gonna i'm gonna be inspired to take a funny picture to make a pratfall to make a pratfall did you see the pratfalls that we did me and uh steven randolph one of the door guys at the comedy store when was this they they posted on the comedy store thing we did no i did we challenged each other to three pratfalls it's so embarrassing listen after brody died i was like i'm going all out i'm experimenting i'm having as much fun as i can you know obviously it's about jokes but sometimes you gotta really just you gotta just have your time up there the brody one was hard on everybody

oh that was the worst didn't make any sense that was one that it just like felt like swallowing a dry rock yeah like how like how's that guy gone it just feel he was just such a big presence and then it it's sad to i don't want to talk too much about ayahuasca on here because i know that's what everyone does but um i did and when and when i did trip on ayahuasca it was right after that and it helped me a lot with that because I kept thinking about how sad it was that he couldn't feel us like hugging him. We loved him. Brody was loved. Like, we loved that man. He was our brother, you know.

And that was the sad part. Well, I mean, I just feel like there's no way any of us could ever understand what's in anybody else's brain. You know, I don't know what's in yours. You don't know what's in anybody else's brain you know i don't know what's in yours you don't know what's in mine it's like they're we we assume that there's a similar thing happening inside our head as other people's heads and i think that's wildly incorrect and i think some people are just in pain all the time yeah and there's not much you can do as a friend to help them you know i mean i felt the same way about Bourdain when Bourdain died. It was just...

I don't get it. I just don't understand how someone who's so loved, he has this amazing job, he has a beautiful daughter, and he has this life that's extraordinary and very interesting and deep, and he gets to meet these fascinating people

and travel the world and expose people to all these incredible artists and culinary artists and yet still didn't couldn't take it didn't want to be here for whatever reason and i just think about it it's like so they're they're okay you know they're off wherever we go or whatever happens they've transcended came back they're floating around somewhere. But it's like selfishly, I'm like, I want more Brody. Of course. I want him back. Of course, yeah.

And then you see people, they just fade. Each year goes by, which is going to happen to all of us. But luckily he had a lot of catchphrases. A lot of stuff online. I love the poster in the back of the store. Oh, I love it. I kiss it every time I walk by it. Do you really? Yeah, I'm not touching it anymore.

Yeah, I lick it. I give it my herpes. Wow! I don't have herpes yet, Joe Rogan audience. But if you do, it's on that. It's okay. And honestly, if you have it, it's fine. When are they going to have a vaccination for herpes?

They must have one already. They've got to. Do you think the government's keeping it from us? Sure. What do you think, conspiracy theorist? Jamie's not a conspiracy you think conspiracy theorist yes he is why do you say that because he already sparked up when we talked about the aliens thing with oh did he bring up ohio no i left it all out but he got his eyes there's just something there's a spark they have conspiracy yeah they have a little spark in their eye when they he perked up he kegeled his asshole a little bit when i. Conspiracy theories? Yeah, they have a little spark in their eye. He perked up.

He kegeled his asshole a little bit when I brought it up. Yeah, but it was really funny. The last question I asked him was about UFOs. Just kind of almost as a joke, but just as a goodbye, to keep it silly. That's all I'm reading. It's in fucking hundreds of articles. It's all Bernie Sanders says he will tell the world about aliens if he becomes president that's the thing that they took out of that well it's smart of him

it feels like trump straws it's like smart if bernie had said it if bernie had brought it up i would have been like that is a brilliant tactic but don't you think the people that believe in aliens are already going to vote for or that are the most hung up on it no no you don't think they're the same no no i think they they vary wildly conspiracy theorists are left wing right wing and the alien one is different than any other one and i think there's a lot more people that are um that are alien lovers that cross both sides i think it's just one of those things where you like alien lovers guys that fuck aliens no no that's i'll only that's alien fuckers you're holding out to people manhattan yeah do people claim that i bet you they do oh for sure do you know there's people really into bigfoot

sexually there's like all these novels written about uh bigfoot just go date a tall armenian no no it's not that hard they're to Glendale. They're everywhere. Go to the Galleria. There's Bigfoot. This is a very localized reference. There's Bigfoot porn. You get it. Bigfoot, or I do get it.

Bigfoot erotica. Yeah. I mean, it's like really common. What if he had a small dick? Like you always hear about the really tall guys with the tiny dicks. And when I say hear about them, you hear about them. See, look at this. Seduced by Bigfoot.

Ooh. And ravaged. Look at it. Come for Bigfoot. Virginia Wade. Bigfoot bitch. Narrated by Lolita Young. Wait a minute.

Narrated? You mean this is an audio book? You know what they say. The bigger the Bigfoot, the bigger the- Bear in the bones? What is that? I like a guy with a really hairy dick. You know?

Really? Like you like to... People say... Listen. People say they don't like too much hair on balls. I say get it all the way under the shaft. Look at this. Up to the tip.

Boughing Bigfoot? What is happening? I feel like I know... I like that her name's Ann L. Oh, wait, wait, wait. Gay Bigfoot. Look at this. Last row.

Ann L. Probes. What is gay Bigfoot? Last row. Look, he's smoking cigarette after he fucked look at that all right here what the fuck a mouthful of sasquatch i feel like i've met that man that looks like one of the door guys at the comedy store that's one of the door guys that got fired this is a whole genre of erotica there's a bunch of women that write these books number 13 this virginia wade lady is uh she's

apparently very prolific with her bigfoot erotica she writes quite a few of these how many does she have well that was 13 at least 13 come for bigfoot come for bigfoot number 13 she just makes shit up then there i was walking the dog and the dog had a heart attack next thing Bigfoot's dick is in my mouth I have a good pun Harry and the Hummersons Henderson Don't think Harry and the Think it out loud

And then just I was sounding it out I can't read Everyone leave me alone What did you expect me To come on in here And fucking smart So there's at least

13 books I bet Virginia Wade Lives in a fucking Giant mansion Drives around in a Roll Elrond Hubbard It's probably a books. I bet Virginia Wade lives in a fucking giant mansion, drives around in a Rolls. I think the L. Ron Hubbard. That's probably a dude. No.

I bet it's with that Bigfoot 5 Baby. Come for Bigfoot Baby? What is that? See that one? Come for Bigfoot. 5 Baby. Why does it say Baby? See that?

Seymour, right-hand side, all the way to the right, all the way to the right, all the way to the right, up above it. There you go Bam What is that? What the fuck is that? Maybe they have a Bigfoot baby It looks like a

Cuminsider one So she's got Let's find out Google Google Virginia Wade's Bigfoot Is that her right there?

She looks normal It might have been Is that a photo of her? Go back Go back It was a different book They were talking about The boff for Bigfoot

Is that her? Is that Virginia Wade? That's a normal looking lady that might not be oh amazon polls buffed yeah by bigfoot romance novels from shelves what why are they censoring bigfoot porn yeah that is uh look at the might have been her gif okay why don't why didn't anyone tell me about these literary treasures oh my god I thought for a second The long but interesting read was about the book This is a long but interesting read Why are they pulling it Why are they pulling this

Stay at home mother from Colorado Of course she is No real writing experience You don't even have to be good She spent all day waxing her nipples She couldn't get to come to terms with her hairy body And then she realized all she needed was to find her match she says i get this crazy idea for a story so she sat down and wrote the entire book in an hour more of a novella there's

no fucking there's no second draft that's what i love to hear by my for my authors you wrote this all in one draft she said just 12 000 words in a matter of weeks she's been considered trying to sell it to a mainstream publisher instead she went directly to amazon's kindle direct publishing an online platform for self-publishing 70 royalty rate for authors i think she sold a fuck load yeah i had to go viral here's the line from it if you want i don't think he's monogamous. But what's Bigfoot? Nah.

So click on that Bigfoot insider monster porn Amazon crackdown link. So let's find out what the fuck is going on here. Why would they crack down on that? Ew, ad blocker. You son of a bitch. Okay, what's it saying here? Yeah, this dude's so hot. Author Virginia Wade's fiction debut follows a group of women who embark on a week-long

camping trip to Mount Hood National Forest. They are in the shadow of Oregon's highest mountains. They're kidnapped and sexually assaulted by a mysterious woodland creature. What the hell is that thing? Asked one protagonist. That's some good writing. It's fucking Bigfoot, hissed Shelly. He's real, for fuck's sake.

Horror filled her eyes with a huge c dash dash dash i'm saying that says cock corn in the book his feet are fucked up with decidedly un-pc title like come for bigfoot cum of course it's just the first of 16 fiction ebooks wade a pen name, has written about the legendary, but best sometimes known as Sasquatch. Each legendary beast, each detailing a series of graphic and often violent sexual encounters between an ape-like creature and her female lovers. Okay. Wade has made an exceptional living writing these stories. Wow. Okay, but why did they take him down?

This reminds me of my friend from middle school's boyfriend who was Sicilian. He was just so hairy and he looked... It's been downloaded more than 100,000 times. Holy shit. That's five bucks. That means she made $500,000 for the flip machine book. For one hour of work. Well, she made 70% of it at least.

Do you think... I bet you the other books didn't take as long either. Wow. During her best months, she's netting 30,000 or more in a month writing Bigfoot jerk off books. Wow. Taken by pirates. Oh, she branched off into other genres. It's all just getting fucked. Taken by pirates.

Seduced by the dark lord. It's like getting fucked fucked taken by pirates seduced by the dark lord it's like getting fucked by demons and pirates and hilarious i'm getting traumatized a traumatic thing is coming up for me right now it's weird do you want to hear it what my mom wrote romance novels when i was shut the fuck yeah they were they were. No, I didn't read them. They were never published? So it was really just a fuck journal. You read your mom's fuck journal? I didn't read it, but she had romance novels around, and I was really good at skimming to the sex scenes.

I knew how to flip through, flick my bean to it. So your mom wrote... She was a part of this thing called Romance Writers of America. And she actually won awards. And then she never followed through. So she could have published the book and probably had success. And then she had a whole, it was like a whole suspense romance. Selena's Revenge was what it was called.

Selena? Like the singer? No, but that's really funny. She came back to fuck Bigfoot. No, she fucks the girl killed her makes her eat oh yeah she's dead i like that lady that little weirdo i mean i don't like her because she killed her but she was she's like a real weird i mean the girl killed the obsessed like you know she reminds me of she reminds me of i definitely don't like her but she um she reminds me of the little woman from, okay, I can't remember.

What's it called? David Lynch. That show. Which one? Twin Peaks. Which one? Wasn't there a little lady in it? I don't remember Twin Peaks very well.

I only watched a few episodes way back in the day. But I just remember usually from the TV movie with Jennifer Lopez in it. Did she play Selena? She played Selena. That was her big break. Really? She was a fly girl. Yeah.

And then she got super hot and that big ass was exposed to us in Selena outfits. That's interesting. But why did that girl kill her? She was her assistant, right? Yeah, she was just such a big fan. I think she was just obsessed with her. So she killed her because she was a big fan. People are fucking crazy.

That doesn't make sense. She probably hated her because she made her wash her laundry and shit. She was her assistant, right? Or I think she was the head of her fan club. Assistants get weird with people. Do you ever hear the David Spade story? His assistant tasered him and fucking tied him up and shit.

Oh my God. Wound up going to jail yeah i guess was it a girl or a guy a guy was he trying to fuck him i don't think so i think he just hated him oh my god i feel like spade would be a nice employer but maybe not maybe not maybe he is now he's got taste up wow i didn't know that yeah yeah yeah see if you can find that story spades had some shit happened he got catfished he's he gets catfished he got catfished but he told it on the norm mcdonald show who catfished him someone catfished him he thought he had met this model on twitter

and then he saw the model in real life and was like hey twitter and she's like what are you talking about he said something oh so embarrassing sp's cool as shit Here goes David Spade's assistant pleads guilty to assault Make that larger please Oh my god David Spade's former assistant pleaded guilty To assaulting the comedian with a stun gun

And agreed to seek counseling for drug and psychological problems Beverly Hills Superior Court Judge Eldon Fox also sentenced David Warren Skippy Malloy on Thursday to five years probation. That's it. Do not hire someone named Skippy. Ordered him to stay at least 100 yards away from Spade and perform 480 hours of community service. If somebody tased me, I want more than community service. Because that's a threat and they tied you up and shit.

How did it end? Wait a minute. It says David Spade, 36. What was this, in the 20s? 2001. Shut the fuck up. Really? That's the beginning article, 2001, right here.

Okay. Oh, my God. He tied him up. I wonder how the story ended. How did he get out of it? Is he just really good with untying knots? I get the guy Tired of fucking him

And getting shocked Says he was angry In a psychotic state Due to cocaine The morning of the attack Dun dun dun I mean I've done coke before

I don't think I've been Like let me tie up my boss And taser him You've never done coke With David Spade You're right Or around him Yeah

Maybe he's You know Telling you to take the dog out And you're like, I can't do this anymore. I can't. I'm too hyper. You said the co-star of the NBC sitcom Just Shoot Me and the new movie Joe Dirt said at the time that Malloy, a 30-year-old aspiring actor, was a friend who is obviously mentally troubled right now.

Wow. And I'm more shocked by Joe Dirt as a new movie. Yeah. We're digging back. 2001. We are digging back. Well, fuck. That seems like a long time ago,

but you know what doesn't seem like a long time ago? 2009. You say 2009, like, oh, that just happened. Nope. 10 years. A decade. Like 1960 to 1970 Seems like forever

70 to 80 Seems like forever 80 to 90 Seems like forever But 2009 to 2019 For whatever fucking reason Seems real close Yeah and it's not

It's not It's not close 10 whole years You Style will show you that too Cause I was I was born in 83 I'm 36

And the younger kids right now Are dressing like I dressed in high school Like it's cycled back around They're in my styles Yeah but that's then 2009 to 2019 Is there a difference in style? Yeah

This is coming from someone that's zero style Yeah there is What is it? It's okay from 2009 um i would say 2009 was maybe when they had started having this one okay wait i have to remember where i was in life i just moved to new york people were wearing i don't know i had lived in santa fe and i was drinking a lot So I definitely I quit drinking in 2009 I still have never been

In Santa Fe It's hard comedy then Santa Fe is supposed to be A weird place That's where I met Tate Fletcher Hollow Caveman Coffee

I met Tate in In Santa Fe He used to come in With a bunch of sober dudes After a meeting I don't know if I'm supposed To say this but Whatever

He's pretty open about it But he I mean it was the truth They were so annoying I was like a drunk I was wasted At this cowboy bar To wear a cowboy outfit you have to you have to that's your uniform really being a waitress is not humiliating enough you also have to dress just have a john deere hat on no you have to wear you had to wear a cowboy hat and you had to have a

shirt that had yolks on it oh if you worked there if you worked there not when you went in yeah that would be crazy That would be crazy But so Tate would come in With a bunch of people And they just wouldn't Order alcohol I mean it was just like Low sales

High maintenance It was like Who is this fucking guy He's so big and ridiculous And then I was talking to him I hadn't quit drinking I didn't quit drinking

Until I moved out of Santa Fe But I told him I wanted to do comedy And he made them Turn the karaoke Night into a comedy show For me Really

Yeah and I got to do comedy that's the first time you ever went up yeah wow did you have things prepared yeah no kidding yeah and then hammered yeah and then and then i moved to new york to do comedy and i was i crashed my motor i had a little scooter a yamaha zuma and i crashed it because i would drive drunk all the time that was my happy place like to this day it really was honestly that feeling like driving wasted on a scooter was the wind blowing through your hair because you're not wearing a helmet the thing about scooters is you don't really think you can kill anybody else so it's not that bad to drive drunk yeah but you can you can get in the way of someone else you can do anything i fucked myself up so bad i woke up just

had blacked out completely. My face was split open. I had road rash all over my tits. This was Father's Day 2008. You don't remember falling? I don't. All I remembered, I just remembered like little pieces. I remembered that someone helped me.

I woke up. I was living at my friend's house. I woke up at the house. He was staying at his girlfriend's house, so I was there alone. But my chin was split open. I'd been wearing a dress. And it looked like my throat had been slit. like there was just blood all the way down it road rash all over my tits all over this side of my arms my knees like i just was fucked up just face planted just face split open i just i went i peeled out and like just went chin

first and everything and then i remembered that someone who didn't a girl that didn't like me had helped me that's all i could remember it was someone who usually hated me helped me wow and then so i went out i went to the hospital i called my roommate he came back um i went to the hospital they i got nine stitches and i was still wasted i was still so hammered and the doctor kept going were you drinking and i kept going just between us he's like yeah i went nope i was like i'm not going to fucking jail you motherfucker i was like no you just crashed my scooter it's crazy he didn't know that i didn't wake up to drink through the pain so um so then i got the stitches and i was friends with all the cops in santa fe because i was an alcoholic so that's a really good plan you gotta befriend them so they don't arrest you and uh

they had told me if they had caught me because i ended up finding my scooter on the side of the road my friend drove me around so i found out where i had peeled out and there was like a bunch of loose gravel so i just peeled out on the gravel and the cops said that they would have arrested me for an aggregate aggravated dui because i hurt myself i'd injured myself that's what an aggravated DUI because I hurt myself. I'd injured myself. That's what an aggravated DUI is? That's what they said back then. I mean, I was still wasted when they said that. That's worse? Have you hurt yourself?

Yeah, because I had to go to the hospital and stuff. You would think you got a little punishment in there. Yeah. Well, so then I didn't learn the lesson. I went out drinking that night with the stitches in my face. And my line was I would carry Neosporin around and ask guys if they wanted to rub Neosporin on my titties. Like I almost lost a nipple. I mean, it got so close.

Yeah, I looked crazy, but I was a drunk. So I was like, woo, fun girl. They used to call me fun girl Annie behind my back. And I thought they were. I thought it was like a cool. They're making fun of me. So anyway, so then I went out that night and I saw this guy with a puppy and I started playing with the puppy. And I was like, oh, your puppy's so cute.

And he goes, do you not remember me? And I'm like, I've never met you before. And he goes, last night I helped you. You crashed your scooter. And I was like, oh, fuck. And he's like, I ride a motorcycle. So I didn't want to call the cops or anything because I know you would have gotten in trouble. And I was like, who helped me?

And he's like, some girl. So then my friend called me. He's like, my boss told me. So it was my friend's boss from this hotel that i used to get wasted at he was the bartender so she hated me because i would just go get hammered at their nice establishment do you look back on those days with any fondness because you're sober now you're all um clean yeah i mean i think i have a wealth of stories i was a juvenile delinquent and i had so many childhood traumas and abuses and weird things that happened i was running for my life in jersey city when i was 15 from like a fake modeling agent who was like a six foot eight drag queen

named mahogany running for my life this is a long good i just have a lot of stories and not a story you can brush over all right what happened you right. What happened? You were 15? So I was, I had gone to- Mahogany? Mahogany, yeah. So I had gone to John Robert Powers Modeling School, one of those like fake modeling schools. Well, you pay like 200 bucks

and they make like a compilation headshot. Yeah, you like go, they give you classes in modeling. Like that's a thing. It's like you either like are weirdly, weird looking alien hot and tall and skinny or not. Yeah. Or you're not.

I mean, I maybe could have done commercials or something. I was cute, but I, I, I also had very low self-esteem. It was just such a weird, it was such a weird thing to be doing. So, um, and I had been a tomboy up until that point. So we go, I go to this modeling thing and then we went to paid more money to go to like a modeling convention. And then they had actual modeling agencies and then they had just random people that I guess paid to be there. So mahogany was one of them. And my mom's like super liberal.

And so she likes anything that's like a little on the fringe that she could brag about at her book club or whatever. If that sounds like I'm angry, I not angry i've forgiven my mother but um so they ended up they're like we want to take your daughter for two weeks and we'll send her out on auditions and stuff over spring break and we have this nice place in jersey 15 yeah your mom let mahogany take you for two weeks so many more stories joe jesus fucking christ yeah no there was my mother did not have anything bad happen to her when she was growing up she was adopted by a very nice family and she went to a nice boarding school and stuff and nothing happened to her did she read the newspaper she didn't read the newspaper i don't think much so she it just she didn't she wasn't aware

so anyway so then okay so i was i went to this place in jersey city in jersey city i don't know how it is now but it was fucking crazy back then it's still fucking it was fucking crazy so we were in this one uh little condo and it was mahogany and then there was like some other people that were there none of us were really that I mean I probably was like the hottest but I was pretty I mean I don't know I think I was cute I don't think I was like a I don't think I was a model and uh I don't think that was my future maybe I could have done something but um the only person that I had really bonded with was this 23 year old guy chris who was this black guy from i don't know where he was from but he was really cool he was really nice

and he was a little creepy like he would say things like if i was your age but he never was trying to fuck me or anything but he kind of was protecting me and at some point mahogany got mad and there was it was fake like i just he would make me go buy him weed on the corner and stuff and it's just a fake thing my parents paid like 1500 to send me to this thing and he would i think he sent me out for to be a i had to go into new york by myself on the train at 15 wearing the sluttiest clothes ever to this thing to and then he would tell me pretend you're lying say you're 21 to be an extra on like sex in the city and stuff. It just wasn't real.

There was nothing real about it. It was a total scam. So I was starting to catch on to that and I was supposed to be there for maybe 10 days, I think. And they had these next door neighbors, Shorty, this little Puerto Rican lady.

I don't, she was a girl, I smoked blunt with her. But, so this guy, Chris, was kind of protecting me and he would go into the city with me and then all of a sudden,

Mahogany didn't like how close we were so he separated us and he said you can't see each other anymore and I was like well I don't feel safe if I can't talk to this guy I just would rather go home I want to call my parents I don't think this is real this seems like bullshit and a scam and he was like you can't talk to your parents and he locked the door and took the phone away from me so I packed all my shit up and I threw it out the window and I yelled down to shorty I was like yo I'm gonna run so grab my shit and then the guy one of the other kids that was staying at the modeling place knew the situation so he went down and bumped into the door unlocked it without him noticing and distracted him and I just jetted out of the fucking house and he started chasing me I was like screaming I was like call the cops help me help me and I was wearing a tube top my like 15 year old titties i had nipple rings were like

hanging i mean i looked like a prostitute the cops ended up coming and they thought i was a prostitute mahogany got me at one point i was hiding under cars for my life like i thought i was gonna get killed i was like screaming people were just watering their plants like what the fuck you're hiding under cars yeah because he was chasing me so i was trying to hide and he finally got me he was like get in the house like you're ruining my scam pretty much and then he scratched my arm but that's all and then the cops came and arrested both of us thought he was my pimp thought i was a prostitute i come from like a like a middle class when you came home um well they came to the cops and then the cops told them that they should arrest my parents

yeah they're like we should and i think they the cops told them that they should arrest my parents. Yeah. They're like, we should. And I think they just were in denial about it or whatever. They should arrest them for a day at least. Yeah, they didn't. And then more stuff happened after that. What? They made more mistakes?

Yeah. But it's okay. We all make mistakes. I love my family. That's cool. They're good now. But I also look at all these things. No, I really have had to do a lot of

work on it because to forgive them yeah because well i blame myself for all of it for most of it which was my defense mechanism like the stuff i had some stuff happen with a teacher in high school too right after that actually it was about six months after that happened and uh you know is this a therapy session i don't want to do a therapy session i don't want to do that but anyway you had asked me about am i happy about these things and so the point that i'm coming to but the point that i'm coming to is i am happy with them i'm so happy with like where my life is now that i can't be mad about any of these other things do you know what i mean like they're they're like exciting and now they're funny because i didn't get hurt that's what i'm saying

like looking back on the wild fucking hilarious yeah there's some crazy shit there's some romance to it if you survive i flashed a chain gang once on my motor scooter and then it didn't start and i had to like put my shirt down and keep walking like it's hilarious i did crazy shit and i came out like genuinely i feel good you know i'm happy with my life so it's good thank you for getting me getting me off of that path by the way well it's just everyone that i know that's funny is fucked up and had something go wrong it's just that's how and it's like how you get through it and then your insight once you get on the other end you persevere and then you don't blame people you don't like go around being mad at the world i think it's it's easier to be um i don't know it's just well some of the most

hilarious people did blame people yeah i guess that's kinnison yeah kinnison was always you know screaming about his ex-wives yeah you know that's true that's funny too i just for my own personal sanity cannot run around angry at everyone well Well, you don't need to be. I mean, it's not necessary. And especially now that you're sober, which obviously Kenneth's never got. Were you friends with him? No, no, never, no. Never met him.

Saw him live a few times. Once at work, once when I was working, I was working at Great Woods Center for the Performing Arts. Oh, cool. it's like a amphitheater in mansfield what were you doing selling phone kicks no security oh cool yeah and i got to see cosby there ronnie dangerfield got to see a few people were you did you want to do comedy yet um i was 19 i probably had thought about it a little bit. Maybe it had been in my head slightly, but I didn't really start thinking about it until I was 20. Did you feel embarrassed when you had that thought at first? Of doing comedy?

Yeah. No, but I did feel like it was preposterous. Yeah. disastrous yeah i did feel like um look it's such a difficult way to make it like i remember my girlfriend when i was 21 her dad was mocking this idea that i was going to be a comedian like i remember him smart guy well you know the odds were not in your favor no they're not in anybody's favor but i remember that's what he was saying you know that like who makes it how many people make it as a comedian and even if you do make it how much money do you what he was saying. How many people make it as a comedian? Even if you do make it, how much money do you make?

He was a doctor. That's so funny. He was really angry. He just felt like I was a waste of his daughter's time. It was really funny. Is he still alive? Let's get him on the podcast. I have no idea.

He's probably not. Doctors don't live that long, a lot of them. My doctor died. It was sad when he died. I was like, I trusted you. Well, there's a great book called dead doctors don't lie by this guy joel wallach and what a lot of it has to do with nutrition and it's about mineral deficiencies and vitamin deficiencies and doctors who abuse drugs and it's essentially talking about how people rely on doctors for advice about health yeah when in reality doctors are good at very specific things

like if you're a podiatrist you're good at fixing feet if you're you know an orthopedic surgeon you're good at knees and shoulders and shit but you probably don't know a fuckload about nutrition yeah and you really don't understand like the mechanisms of your body's absorptions of nutrients and minerals and vitamins and one of the things that i've learned from doing this podcast is to understand that even like what i the cursory understanding of it that i have you have to go through fucking hours and hours and hours of reading and watching documentaries and listening to experts and i still have to go back over and over and over it again so i've talked to doctors before and they've been like super dismissive about even taking vitamins

and i get angry at them i'm like what well i think all you need is a balanced diet i'm like well you're retarded like what are you talking about that's a and by that way i don't mean someone with down syndrome that is a retarded way in slowed down you are you're you have a diminished capacity for advancement you're slowing down the reality of the progress of nutritional science yes this is a stupid thing you're doing right now you're giving me bad advice you really don't know what the fuck you're talking about i get angry i'm like why would you say that like this is don't tell me that there's no benefit to taking vitamins when there's a fucking ass load of studies yeah there's data and science and it's all provable do you think he's spend thousands of hours researching this stuff and

trying to figure out what the fuck is good for you and what's not good for you and some chubby asshole with a fucking skinny fat body is telling me that all you need is a balanced diet i'm like bitch what's your diet yeah you ain't got a balance and do you think that they're just doing that because they don't get money out of their out of the vitamins no no they don't have they just don't feel like reading up on the new stuff but they haven't they haven't decided to pursue it that's all it is i mean and if they did pursue it they'd realize it's a fucking bottomless pit of information yeah from essential fatty acids to different kinds of proteins and absorption of plant-based proteins versus animal-based proteins what's the benefit of grass-fed beef over regular beef it's a fucking endless stream of yeah i mean

if you follow someone like dr ronda Patrick, you realize really quickly that she is in the heart of this shit 24 hours a day, seven days a week, and she's still learning things. It never ends. It never ends. I mean, we, and also it varies. What's good for you is not necessarily good for me. Your diet might not be as effective as my diet.

I only eat elk. Is that bad? That's good. That's good for everybody. All I eat is elk all day. It'll turn you into a fucking savage. Some fucking elk, dude. I'm going to give you some.

I got some waiting for you. A fanny pack and some goddamn elk. That's why I'm on here. What kind of cooking setup do you have at your place? I just have just a stove. Do you have a frying pan, like cast iron frying pan? Yeah, I do. Do you know how to cook?

Are you a good cook? I'm all right. Decent? Okay. I'm decent. I'll hook you up with some elk I do. Do you know how to cook? Are you a good cook? I'm all right. Decent? Okay. I'm decent. I'll hook you up with some elk sausage. We'll start with that. I'll give you a recipe, how to cook it correctly.

Do you have a thermometer? I'm really into Bigfoot porn. Can you not say elk sausage in front of me? I don't have a meat thermometer. No? Okay. Well, that's good for elk sausage. It's fine.

You'll get a sense of when it's good. I can't you want want me because i didn't get to it well you were talking about milk sausage bro i'm sorry i'm insulting her no it's just bigfoot dick elk sausage i don't know why i wouldn't draw those two i wouldn't pull those together why you wouldn't yeah why why would i not have one of them is an undulate the other one is a legendary primate oh my god you're really getting stuck on semantics here listen you're the one who cracked the joke let me just make some fucking jokes i just got accused of doing a therapy session and now i'm telling jokes i'm feeling triggered are you feeling judged no no, but I'm not feeling judged. But everybody that I know that has had those wild, drunken days

that has come out on the other side, there's something nostalgic about it. You look back and you go, huh, I made it through that. Have you been to an AA meeting? It's like the good old times in AA. Or I always felt like people were either telling these stories that were so insane and i was like i'm not an alcoholic or they were like i was like that's pussy shit like you know get out of here you're not even cool enough to be here like

celebrity rehab right did you ever watch that show uh-uh one of the best parts about it was eric roberts you know julia roberts brother it's been a bunch of movies he uh was there for weed addiction yeah and everybody else is having the fucking dt's they're on the floor in the fetal position shaking he's reading the paper he's losing weight he's getting his shit done he's on a treadmill it was so ridiculous like some people you know their stories are a joke i did quit smoking weed and it did make things a lot easier like laundry just little things I was like oh that was maybe making things I would always smoke weed before I would clean my apartment and

that was like seven years to get my apartment clean yeah it can get distracting it doesn't it does not affect me well yeah well when I do things like if I want to clean my office I just have like the thing like this is what we're doing now and I find that even listening to music is not good oh yeah i find i used to listen to podcasts while i clean my office but then i find that i would be like pausing and listening to a particular part then i'd want to rewind it i'm like oh i'm fucking with myself here i'm distracting right and then that's a weird defense mechanism too because i do that all the time too i'm always multitasking and i always have to be doing three

things at once it's like why yeah because it's gonna make me i'm gonna slow down so much i might have to like deal with my own shit yeah so like writing too like sometimes i write listening to music but most of the time it's better without music with lyrics yeah yeah sometimes lyrics and sometimes foreign music i like foreign music because i don't know what they're saying what kind brazilian i like a lot of brazilian music i like a lot of spanish music I like a lot of Spanish music. Some Bollywood or what? I listen to some of that. All right.

You know Dollar Mende? Do you know who Dollar Mende is? No? You don't know Dollar Mende? Oh, he's amazing. He's really cool. I just listen to a lot of Elton John. That's what I'm into right now.

That's why I like to wear all my crazy things, too. I like to Elton John that shit. I'm going to play you some Dollar Mende. Let me hear it. I'll play it on my phone. You think we get banned? 100%. 100%? before even if we oh because you can't yeah yeah how do you spell his name d-a there it is dollar mending um what does this say the song is not currently available in your country or region oh my god

i love it now i'm really into it i want that shit what is that oh here it goes we can't hear it we can't hear it we can't hear it we can't hear it that's actually a woman getting fucked by big even the guy yelling yes Okay. Welcome to the wonderful world of the internet. Anyway, I like Dollar Mendy. It sounds cool. Is his name Dollar? D-A-H. Hold on.

I would like it better if it was like the dollar symbol. D-A-L-E-R-M-E-H-N-D-I. But I think he got arrested for human trafficking. But can you still like his work? That's a problem. Like, I was at, Dave Chappelle and I did some shows the other day. Oh, yeah. And we had a DJ, and the DJ was playing all this Michael Jackson music.

And he is so good. Yeah, he's great. Even though he's a fucking pedophile. Allegedly. Most likely. Yeah. Pretty probably. Yeah. Definitely did something wrong. so good yeah he's great though he's a fucking pedophile allegedly most likely yeah pretty probably yeah definitely did something wrong yeah even though it's still fucking great yeah but also he's dead yeah so what if you don't listen to his music you're punishing what are you punishing okay the man's dead right but even if he wasn't dead like if ted bundy had some great poetry would you want to read it would you enjoy it um no i don't know probably not yeah yeah

i mean i don't know this i really don't know what michael jackson did i don't know and i don't think anybody does it's so he did it too yeah but there's a lot of fucking weirdness to it for sure yeah holding hands with little boys and i know it's really uncomfortable just like inappropriate boundaries and that's enough to like molest a kid honestly just having that inappropriate this blurred thing between kids and grown-ups it's not good yeah you hold hands with your nieces and nephews and that makes sense your children that makes sense but if you're a 55 year old man and you're holding hands with 11 year old boy in dubai yeah that's weird i gotta get i gotta get suspicious yeah i gotta question whether i'm gonna enjoy this song that i'm enjoying right now

but it was so good i was listening to the music i was like god damn this guy was amazing yeah so exceptional but there's no way he wasn't molested. I mean, doesn't he seem so molested? Well, in the interest of beating a fucking dead horse, I have talked about this many times in the podcast where I think that he was a castrato, which is someone who was castrated when he was very young to preserve his high-pitched voice. Then his doctor, the same doctor that killed him, came out later. This is long after I predicted this, and said that he was chemically castrated to preserve his voice. So he confirmed what I was saying.

Now, whether this doctor is telling the truth or not. So with castration, are you not able to get a boner? I don't believe so. Oh, my God. So he maybe wasn't molesting them but he was just he could have been just being weird with them i don't know who maybe he didn't do anything with them maybe he just wanted to be a child maybe his childhood was stripped from him because he was famous from the time he was five fucking years old and his father did something yeah it definitely

was a weird life according to the doctor his his father did did something to him like chemical castration is what they do to pedophiles. They'll do it to pedophiles so that they can never get erections. And it basically stops your body's production of testosterone and kills your testes. And they do it with some chemical injection. And apparently, according to the doctor, that's what they did to Michael Jackson, which you think about his voice, it makes sense.

Because his voice was insane. It was so high pitched and if you listen to like castratos those uh there's there's only a few recordings of actual castratos but it was a common practice not common it wasn't like everybody did it but it was a practice that was done to young boys to preserve their high-pitched voice where they're fucking castrate what a word horrible castrato but they did it i mean people would let their children get their balls chopped their high-pitched voice where they would fucking castrate them. What a word. Horrible. Castrata. But they did it, I mean,

people would let their children get their balls chopped off just so they could sing good and they would, you know, it'd be very valuable to them. How long ago was that? Well,

there's a recording so the recording, I don't think they had recordings until like the late 1800s. I don't believe. There was a lot of dance back in the day.

A lot of boys dancing for kings. When was that? The last one was 1922. 1922 was the last Castrato recording? And how old was that dude? So he's probably born in the 1800s or something? He died in that same year, so I don't know. But it's a thing.

He died never nutting, but always beautiful singing. Have you ever heard it? He had the voice of an angel. We can't play that either, right? No, you should listen to it, though. That sounds so upsetting to listen to. It is upsetting. It's haunting. Yeah, you can't enjoy that.

Yeah, I played it for a friend of mine the other night, and he was like, what? And I was like, look, you've got to listen to this. And I played it, and he's like, is that fucking real? And he's like, it sounds like someone did something to someone. And you're like, aww. Maybe people should jerk off to it in honor of the man. He was 63 when he died in 1922.

He was born in 1958, and those recordings were done in 1902 to 1904, so that makes them 40s. Yeah, he was in his 40s when he was recording those. You said 1958? You mean he was born in 1858? 1858 is when he was born, I'm sorry, yeah. And died in 1922. Wow.

Yeah, the whole thing's dark. The look you gave me during my circle jerk idea was rude. What look did I give you? You gave me a, come on, bitch, circle jerk for the... I was saying to... Are you dwelling on the look? Are you projecting? Listen, I know this is uncomfortable

for you and you're nervous to be here, but I'm your friend and I love you and I want you to be happy. You want me to be happy? Yes, I know. You are so nice. I'm not looking to trip you up. The king. Come on. The king. You know I love you. I know. I love you too. Thank you so much for having me. I really do appreciate it. I'm not looking to trip you up. The king. Come on. The king. You know I love you. I know I love you too. Thank you so much for having me. I really do appreciate it.

I am trying to be chill. It's just like a cool. Are you weirded out by this? By being here? I'm not weirded out. I'm trying to be in the moment. I like to be funny impulsively. It's my impulse to always tell jokes and stuff.

And this is a more chill, less jokey. You can be jokey. Okay, now there's pressure to be joking you're overthinking this shit too much i'm not overthinking anything i'm being chill and normal everyone relax two cups of coffee i have two cups of coffee one's calling me a cunt what is uh one of them one of them is caveman what's the other one this is caveman and this is a cunt mug i got it for my dad then i got one for myself too you got it for my dad and then I got one for myself too. You got it for your dad? Yeah, as a joke. Well, my dad and I, it also looks like it says aunt.

We one time, we went to, we were at the post office. My dad's very funny. He reminds me of Catty Daddy actually. Oh really? The Kyle Dunnigan thing. By the way, that fucking thing is hilarious that you guys are doing. I know, it's funny. Are you doing more of those?

Yeah, we recorded one and then it just wasn't funny. It wasn't. We have to rethink it. Don't want to put out. We don't want to disappoint with Catty Day 2. But the one you did do, the one you did put out is hilarious. Yeah. That was fun.

Yeah. He's so funny. He's hilarious. But so my dad and I were at the post office and mailing something out. And I was taking a while to mail something out. And we're just jokingly antagonistic. My dad's like, come on. I was like, dad, leave me alone.

I'm not done. We're just joking with each other. And this old woman who's been observing, she goes to leave. And then she just pivots before she leaves and turns around. She goes, you know what, young lady? You're a real itch. An itch. An itch. And my dad goes i think you

mean an aunt which is fucking one of our best stories my daddy's funny so she doesn't realize you're just joking around she didn't get we were just joking she was like oh you're being so and it's like did you tell her hey this is my dad we're just joking around no my dad said she's an aunt we laughed so i think she got it yeah well she was leaving when he said it yeah and we just were like crying and the fact that someone like needs to stop you and put you in your place yeah it's just so silly but it's like she was old what does she know i'm sure i'm just gonna try really hard to not be one of those old people what do you think you're gonna be like as an old lady i think i'm gonna peak i'm excited well i'm i'm trying really hard to i'm trying really hard to be in the moment and appreciate each new age and not get anything in my face or do anything like that anything in your

face well you know except cum shots obviously no i mean like uh you know oh you know i don't yeah try not to do anything too crazy it's just it's fighting an inevitable thing and i think it's a gift to age you know it's we get to be different every day. My mom was, she worked at this organization called Gray Panthers, which. Gray Panthers? Yeah, it was for old people. Old people that like to fuck? Old people that like to fuck.

I mean, I'm sure they like to fuck. But Maggie Coon. Maggie Coon was the woman's name, which I know there's a little bit of a parallel between Gray Panthers, Black Panthers. Raccoons? Her last name is Coon. Oh. Yeah. But it was spelled differently. woman's name which i know there's a little bit of a parallel between gray panthers black panthers her last name is yeah but it was spelled differently um but so she was this it was in philadelphia and she was uh she like died when she was 90 maybe 89 but we used to hang out with her all the time and she had dated famously dated like a 40 year old i think in her 80s or something hollow so i think she was fucking was she pegging him she might have been pegging him i don't know if she could peg at that point she had a lot of hats

and a lot of cats down he could peg oh he can peg himself yeah you remember uh elizabeth taylor it was like she married a series of gay guys before she died oh yeah yeah i think that happens to really pretty old ladies that you know well they just want a man to tell them they're beautiful. I've been just showered with compliments by gay men. Yeah, I think they go through menopause too, and they probably give up on the idea of sex. Yeah. They just want pretty men around them.

Yeah. I mean, not that her gays were that pretty. I've had prettier gays. I've definitely been the last. I've been the last puss for a couple guys. The last puss before gay? Yeah. Really?

And then one guy got married and shit i was sure he was i sure i was sure it was his last listen just because he got married doesn't mean he's not good yeah that's a good point i know but he guys would gay men would reach out to him they would try to touch him and i was like he was always wearing a suit we lived in santa fe i'm like why are you wearing a suit like slap his their hands like not until he comes out he's mine i knew i mean i was like there's no way he used to always want to have like threesomes with other guys like there was always i remember we invited my one friend in we were just drinking so much we called uh we called um jack daniels oj so we didn't feel weird and we're like pass the oj we're just like fucking shit faced all the time

chugging we went to this college at my college and i'm going out of business just this little school in santa fe just hammered and uh my friend who i worked at a restaurant with a guy friend he wanted to hook up with me so he's like sweet so he like hops into bed with us and then he leaves and the next day he's like he kept looking me in the eye and he kept looking at me he kept trying to make eye contact with me so he was boning you and your boyfriend's like i don't know if he ended up boning me i think he would just he hopped in the hopped out pretty quick what does that mean because he got freaked out because he kept looking at him he gave it i don't know if it actually i mean we were in full blackouts at that point i don't remember anything i really feel like i'm five years

younger than i am because i just blacked out five years you should write about those days i know i will be a hilarious book there were so many i have so many crazy stories and it's funny because i always thought everyone else had them i really thought everyone else had this crazy i'm like you didn't steal cars when you were like you didn't do all these things that never happened to you have you thought about writing a book yeah but there'll be it's also a great like comedy writing exercise yeah i know i want to tell these stories on stage to more yeah flash in the chain gang was i mean there's just been so many i drew some pictures

i draw too so i haven't drawn in a while but i drew like a coloring book once that i never followed through with but it was uh lessons from a chubby alcoholic and it was just different like true scenes from my drinking days just fucking crazy the shit i did so how did you stop uh well tate that actually brings me back to tate so i moved to new york i wanted to do stand-up so bad i just done that one thing at the cowgirl in santa fe and i liked it i really i i was nervous and i don't remember i'm sure it was like all abortion jokes i don't really remember but then i do remember my first set after that um i remember all the beginning ones so the first one was when I got to New York I moved to New York to do stand-up I crashed my scooter so

I wanted to move to LA I had met people out in LA and I thought that was where I wanted to go but because I kept drinking and driving I was like I have a drinking and driving problem I have to go somewhere where I can't drive so I moved to New York, thank God, because I think I really, I think it helped me really push and get really strong before I came out here. So I moved to New York. I wanted to do standup. I was just drinking. I was partying. I have so many friends that I just met on benders, like random shit. I was just doing insane things, day drinking, just way more drunk than everyone else. I left my drinking buddies in Santa Fe and everyone everyone else was kind of like what are you up to so i was staying on my friend's couch and i wanted to do stand-up and so finally she was like look i'm let's just go to an open mic i'll go with you and i was like all right so i got all my jokes ready we go to an open mic um i go up i drop my

set list and then i completely black out. I'm so nervous. I'm in this basement at this place called Cake Shop. My friend Caperlamp was the host of it. Or was she the host yet? I don't know. Anyway, I got up on stage and completely bombed. I just started yelling at everyone. I just started yelling at all of these comics.

Like, fuck you, you piece of shit. I don't know what happened. And then I sat down at the bar, and I'd already quit Jaeger. Jaeger was the first thing I quit. So I was sitting at the bar and some guy came up, this comic who I did not like or think was funny or want anything to do with. And he kept buying me drinks. He was buying me shots of Jaeger. And I was like, look, man, I'm like struggling with drinking. I really like I can't really say no to a drink, but please stop buying them for me.

He just kept buying them. Like I just was, you know, I wasn't going to stop. And so he stop buying them for me he just kept buying them like i just was you know i wasn't gonna stop and so he kept buying them and then so then i ended up waking up on his air mattress this is after my first open mic waking up on his air mattress fully clothed didn't fuck him or anything just like trapped somewhere in bushwick it was snowing i was like where am i what am i doing i looked around his apartment i'm like all i want to do is be a comedian i was so sure that's what i wanted to do i was spending all this time drinking getting fucked up second set ever this was my second yeah this was when i had moved to new york was my first one in new york what it made you so sure that you wanted to be a comedian i just never wanted to do anything else

and when i think but you'd only had one set at a karaoke bar and then the second set where you screamed and told everybody to fuck off what was it that made you think that you could do it um i just i don't know i just never wanted to do anything else i just didn't have another there was no other plan i had been a special ed teacher i had done a go-go dancer i'd worked at the bars i'd done all that stuff i just never i just always i just felt like if i could do it i could do it i mean i guess it's a little bit of that delusion and that but i just i never but i knew that i wouldn't be able to do i knew there were obstacles in my way and i knew that

drinking was one of them i had talked to a comic before uh that set at the open mic and he had said just try not to his advice to me was try not to hook up with the with the guys at open mics because you're going to get a reputation when you're just trying to be respected so he had said that to me that's good advice i think it was great advice because it's also there's no time for that right this was my whole hustle also what are the odds that person's going to follow through if you follow through and become a comic what are the odds that they are yeah you might get hitched up to some fucking loser yeah you definitely don't want to get hitched up but it also was i needed to put all my energy i was in an i'm barely in a place now to be in a relationship So it's like this was 11 years ago

So I I When I woke up on that guy's air mattress I was like fuck like I already broke The thing that I wanted to do And I was already you know from all my like weird Sexual assaulty stuff when I was younger I just didn't have a good relationship with sex

Drinking didn't help with it You know everything was just out of control And I have this thing now this like precious thing that I want so bad so you know crashing my scooter almost dying all that shit wasn't enough but stand-up really was that's what I wanted so I went to my friend's house and I called Tate I just called Tate. I was like, I just want to do this, and I want to quit drinking. And so he told me to go to meetings and just try it out. Do you remember your first meeting? Yeah, I went to one.

I think it was the Lower East Side. And the guy sharing was talking about it. He's like, I always knew I had a problem because when I was two, I took all of the Tylenol. And I was like, what are you talking about? Any kid with a childproof thing is just going to eat the pills I remember kind of judging him and being like whatever but it was good to have that community then because I needed to detach myself from like the partiers and all

that lifestyle so I did go to I did 90 and 90 I did a meeting every day for 90 days and then I I never went back some people actually learn how to do stand-up from those meetings there was a guy named I got a bomb there was a guy named Dave. I learned how to bomb. There was a guy named Dave Fitzgerald who was a really funny comedian back in Boston. And he learned how to do stand-up from making hilarious stories out of his drunk days. Because he was a fucking raging alcoholic. Yeah.

And he did the same thing. Just quit and then started doing stand-up literally learned How to do it Yeah For a meeting Because he would tell These crazy stories About being blacked out Drunk and fucked up And being in gun fights You know

High speed chases And all this nuts If you had alcohol to shit Crazy stuff goes down Oh yeah But those guys Many of them Learn how to do stand up

Yeah you're standing up In front of an audience I was brought up Quaker too So our church was You stand up and speak And everyone just sits there In silence and watches you Yeah What's that like which one's quaker that's the oat box oat box everyone's like gets it confused with amish which has nothing to do with amish what's

the difference it's just a very chill christianity so it's were those the pilgrims pacifist pilgrims quakers no i don't think they were the they were um when did quakerism start i don't know pacifists yeah they're pacifists they believe that god's in the form of an inner light that's in everyone and everything so why would you fight i mean i agree with that just from hallucinogens and shit too but um it's something i struggle with like i have to look back at you know childhood predators and i'm like can i i have to forgive these people because they are from the same light i guess what is the what's the wacky thing um quakers are well it's just

very it's just you sit in silence so the churches there's two types there's programmed and unprogrammed i was unprogrammed which is the super chill one there's no bible talk there's no preacher there's nothing you just sit in benches facing each other my meeting house had these old creaky explain what are you talking about so it's like a it's a meeting house that you meet up with on sundays yeah or you look down at your hands you don't really look at each other but you you sit there's facing benches and then there's you know benches here so you are kind of all looking at it you're facing each other and what do you do you sit in silence and then if you feel moved to speak it's supposed to be god speaking through you but if you just feel moved to speak

at all you just stand up and you say whatever you want wow and so you're not reading scripture i mean some people every once in a while someone would do that growing up but i went to a quaker school too and we were little kids we used to have to sit in silence for like 45 minutes which was impossible it's such bad ad it was insane i would wear shirts that had like things on it i could play with like i had a shirt with a phone and it had like a cord and I would just wear it and I would set alarms and sit on my alarm so it wouldn't go off. I just had to be doing stuff. It was crazy.

You're just so little and you're just sitting there silently. People are so bored. Little kids get so bored, you know, and what's the first thing they do? They try to medicate them because they're so bored. Well, I got medicated too. We did Ritalin and stuff. Oh no. But when I was older, i don't feel like it

affected me they put me on antidepressants a little bit but i was pretty good at being like i don't want to do these things you don't feel like it affected you to be on ritalin but i didn't take it for that long how long did you take it for i don't know i don't think i took it for that long ali mccroskey duh she was talking about it last night i love her love her too she was talking about how like that same shit happened to her when she was a kid it last night love her love her too she was talking about how like that same shit happened to her when she was a kid just yeah bouncing off the walls and they medicate you yeah it's so it is interesting because it is i can only imagine what it's like to be a parent you just there's all this information coming at you and you're dealing with your own shit a lot

of people didn't go through their healing process or anything too so it must be so hard to be a parent it's just got to be crazy i think about it i never wanted to have a kid until i did some hallucinogens and then i was like maybe i want to have a kid you'd be a great mom yeah i think i would but i'm just dealing with all my heal i'm dealing with all my i just want to make sure i'm not in a place i i was very angry in the past and it's something that i work on a lot i just wouldn't want to redo patterns and stuff like that. But I do think because I've had, I had such a traumatic stuff.

I think I would be, I think I could protect my kids in a good way. The Quakers are allowed to medicate their kids. That's part of the doctrine. Yeah, you can, there's no doubt. I mean,

it's pretty loose. It's like, you can do whatever you want. There was one guy that wore his like Jewish stuff to a meeting. I went to meeting after the election. I went a little bit little bit i was like maybe i want to go back to church what the quaker church yeah i just 2016 yeah because i just was it just triggered a lot of things in me and and uh i went real crazy for a second i just had a lot of trauma that i wasn't dealing with when trump won it wasn't this is embarrassing okay i was hanging out with a lot of

anyway what happened i just got really like i got really mad i don't know i got really mad i just wasn't i wasn't um dealing with stuff and it just kind of pushed all this stuff forward for me and how so what do you mean by just like some sexual assault stuff just came up like i think a lot of people that were angry and were marching around and stuff or had some personal triggers that had happened for them oh so because of like the grabbing by the pussy talk yeah and then you read it and then i read up on it and it's not what it seems and i don't know i just i you know there was a lot of hysteria and it just triggered it just triggered a lot of my shit but I'm glad it did because it helped me get through a lot of stuff and I definitely I think have a different view on those things now and I you know I was

running around so mad at who I'm like who am I mad at I did a lot of like when it first happened I was like fuck man I did that for about three months thank god I got out of that but really angry and just projecting and pissed and all this stuff and it's like there's a few there's a few men i'm mad at right there's a few i'm certainly not mad at men but there are a few from your past yeah you know and that was something i had to deal with and i had to learn to compartmentalize that and not make it this broad thing i hate when people do that's so upsetting so upsetting. The drinking days? The drinking days and from my childhood. You know, I had some fucked up shit happen. But, you know, it's just important for me to not blame a large group of people that have nothing to do with my trauma. And it's also when I get triggered, what I needed to learn was that's my responsibility to handle my trigger.

And I can't just be running around like this unsheathed sword. I mean, I can, but I'm going to cut everyone around me. Yeah, the thing that people do when they blame everyone that's part of that group. It's so common. You remember there was a real problem a few months back where Liam Neeson was talking about one of his friends that had gotten something that happened where a black guy had done something, murdered one of his friends, raped one of his friends, something awful. I think it was rape.

And so he would go out at night with a bat looking for a black guy to start trouble. And he talked about it. Everybody was furious at him. Yeah. And he's saying like, look, I didn't do anything and I was in a terrible state of mind. I'm just being honest about this. I'm not proud of this.

It was one of the most embarrassing and darkest moments of my life, but I did it. Right. And not letting people express those things and talk about it and say away, because I am embarrassed

that I got so man-hating. I mean, it's, you know, there's a couple of podcasts I did where I was like, fuck man, you know, and I, that hurts people people i hurt people by saying that i mean but whatever no but people have lashed out on me for stuff like that but it's like i don't fucking

i don't have the capacity to hate an entire group of people and i certainly like i have brothers i have my dad i don't don't you think so sometimes you say things and that's not really what you mean yeah and then you're expressing anger of course and then i think right now what's going on and i've checked out of a lot of stuff i don't pay attention to a lot of things anymore because it was just like the news you mean yeah it's just like not it's not real i don't read twitter i don't i just don't do it it's like i gotta focus on what i can do and how i can feel good and how i can i just want to make people laugh have a good time make people feel good i want to feel good and how I can, I just want to make people laugh, have a good time, make people feel good. I want to feel good. It's like, I can't do that if I'm in this constant state of taking in all this information that's just pushing my buttons,

pushing my buttons. Well, yeah, some of it's not going to be, but some certainly is. And if you're not controlling the, like you have a mental diet too. And that's something that people don't think of all the time. You know, I don't remember who who described it that way but it's the best way of describing it you have a physical diet and if you have a poor physical diet your body's sick yeah but if you have a poor mental diet your mind is sick yeah you're taking in nonsense all the time and fights you know i had bernie sanders on yesterday and who that guy is running for Oh, he kind of looks like my dad. A little bit. Okay, cool. And I briefly looked into the comments of one of the posts, and so many fucking people are so goddamn toxic. Yep. They're just battling it out left and right and misrepresenting his position and misrepresenting.

Someone was calling me an alt-right white supremacist white nationalist like what in the fuck that's so hot they said that i had a t-shirt so they said someone said that i had someone what is this storm front or something like that what is that white supremacist page storm front or something they said i had the founder of storm front on my part what the fuck are you talking about you just make are you a proud boy no i'm so proud of those guys i had gavin mcgivin who gavin who is the founder of the proud boys i had him on before but i had him on before there was a proud boys i didn't even know what the fuck yeah but also why can't you talk to a person i i asked him about it and i was critical i was criticizing him i was like

you can't just claim you're gonna have violence with people it's it's so fucking dumb and then all the proud boy shit that happened with violence came far after that but people are like blaming me for having him on i don't even know what the fuck it is he's the co-founder of vice it's also just it's also interesting don't you want to hear the other side like don't you want to hear everyone's opinions and everyone's thoughts don't you want to try to understand and come to a common ground Don't you want to hear the other side? Like, don't you want to hear everyone's opinions and everyone's thoughts? Don't you want to try to understand and come to a common ground? Don't you want to realize, like, I'm not religious really or anything, but it's like we are all God's children. Like, there's missing this whole thing.

It's this fight against each other. Yes, but no. Okay. The problem is there's a lot of these people that do go on shows and try to reinvent themselves in a disingenuous way. And they try to whitewash what they're doing or whitewash their past and to that point i mean the idea is that you're helping them recruit people okay before he was on my podcast though there was no recruit there was no people for him to recruit to so people need to understand like he wasn't there was nothing

like i had a mom because it was this guy who was funny and he used to do a lot of interesting videos right he fucked up when he started that group and he fucked up when he was calling for violence and telling people to choke a bitch and punch people and grab these people and he was doing it in response to the violence that antifa was was pushing on right-wing people that would have these meetings and they would show up. Yeah, doing like the clown mirror back at them. It's all- Being crazy, yeah.

It was all poorly thought out. But the idea that that makes you a white nationalist because you talk to someone- Because you talk to them, yeah. It's so fucking stupid. But it's like this is the world we live in and everything's so polarized. It's like you're left or right. You're black or white. You're one or zero.

It's like there's no gray area. They also freeze you in the one moment that you said the thing and then there's no before or after there's no growth there's nothing it's like you're fucking out yeah they just look for this quote trap and just that's it you said that you said that like no like i clarified i expanded i took it back i revisited it like there's a lot of things that people do when you talk or you just you know you say things like you say things like you don't even know what the fuck you're going to say when you're saying it yeah and then you go that doesn't make sense and then you re re clarify and when you're talking a long foreign conversation and like this in a podcast and someone wants to take a snippet out of it and i just decide that that's who you are it's nuts it doesn't make any sense and it's this is the world we're living in today everybody wants to paint everyone is toxic yeah

everyone you want to paint so many people i should say want to paint people as being a problem or a negative thing and it's like this is the twitter world where 20% of the people make 80% of the posts. And so many of them are fucking losers. And it's also, it's such a, you're giving all of your power out to outward. You're not paying attention to yourself. You're blaming others. You're trying to change the world around you. You're trying to create a safe space through other people.

Like, do you know how unhappy you're going to be in your life if you're expecting other people to come cower to all of your demands and do all of your stuff everyone's dealing with their own fucking shit they're not trying to be happy part of it what's what they're trying to do is somehow or another score points and rack up you know and and distract themselves from their own life by focusing on these external issues that they think are critical and super important and some of them are obviously running for president whoever's going to be president's very important issue and most of the time like 95 percent of the time i avoid comments but for whatever reason i just found myself flipping through it because i wanted to see what the people think about bernie yeah i'm like oh what a mistake you can't look you can't

look it seems worse though it seems like every time i check if i if i don't check twitter for four months and then i check it it's like whoa is that if things accelerated this much or people are so angry at so many different things and just they they paint people in such character caricature like aoc she is a woman who i don't think they're i don't think i've ever seen anybody work so people work so hard to mischaracterize her or paint her in in a horrible light and i'm like look she says things that i don't agree with yeah why is everyone so fucking angry like what is this well people will put all their thing on things on you know they have these beliefs and like definitely when i was in my hole like you know when i was extra angry and feeling you know you have these beliefs and like definitely when i was in my hole like you know

when i was extra angry and feeling you know you you have this whole system around you and you know you can't hear the other side and you have to like yes everyone has to be a villain in that or they they're either with you or against you and i don't know it's just to me it's just unhealthy i had to tap out i stopped paying attention to a lot of stuff and i don't know if that makes me ignorant i just got to live a happy life no i don't think it does make you angry i don't think it's a an effective way to communicate i think it's a really piss poor way to communicate and i think it it fosters rage more than anything yeah there's something about being able to talk to people where you don't have social cues you don't have empathy you're not looking at them and people say the meanest nastiest shit to each other and it's insulting people and dunking on people is more

important than actual communication well it's attention too so it's you know they're maybe trying to impress their other buddies that are on there they're trying to get those extra little likes right they're like the the main point would be they want to get your attention holy shit they got joe rogan's attention that's so cool you know they just want to feel alive or whatever and that's you know people have their own process i try to not take anything personally it's like you don't know me if you don't like me like that's weird you don't know me you shouldn't really have that much of an opinion it's like not finding your validation you can't find the good stuff or the bad stuff in the comments you can't well if you look at the

comments for good things it's just as bad as looking up for bad things yeah i mean some people think it's a good idea to gauge like whether or not the conversation was effective whether or not you could have done something better to navigate it more efficiently or more um more entertaining for the make it more entertaining for the people that are listening looking for the constructive criticism yeah i mean there can be some of that from some people the problem is you're trying to manage all this data at scale right you're dealing with thousands and thousands of humans that are chiming in and a lot of them are deeply unhappy yeah a lot of people that are commenting on things that are just really frustrated with their lives like imagine if someone saw or listened to you when you're like fuck man and yeah and they're like oh that's who she is right exactly and you see they see you on here laughing

and being silly yeah like wait a minute who's this bitch yeah you know like that doesn't make any sense that's not the same person yeah well you're not the same person you're not the same person who you were six months ago i know we grow in yeah hopefully yeah i hope so i mean i do i try to do a lot of work on myself um i stopped watching this was huge for me i was watching a lot of true crime oh jesus i was watching like date lines stuff like that all these things and i mean that is fucking toxic people are obsessed with it they're obsessed with it and i just started to realize i know a friend of mine had there was one about her sister. And once I saw that and I just realized like, this is not good.

This is finding entertainment out of these really real things that have happened to people in this pain. And I have had fucked up things happen. I've had friends have fucked up things happen. I've seen these things. I don't need to bring awareness to this. I know that. And, um, well, a lot of women get into those true crime shows. It's like dramatic and everything, but it's not.

It's real. These are real things that happen to people. But is it because you want to know that that's out there so you can prepare yourself or so you can be aware? Like what is the appeal? Because apparently, see, fine if this is true, but I remember reading this, that true crime shows sort of skew in their demographics more female than male. Like, the more females are into true crime shows than male. Yeah, I don't know. I just, I think it's like a beginning, middle, and end to a story.

Like, there's a whole plot line, and then they catch the person, and the way the editing is, and they have the interviews. Well, for a lot of the episodes, they will. Sometimes they catch them before they kill them, and that's disappointing. But it's just very... Young women are the biggest true crime buffs, and here's why. If you're even remotely interested in true crime story, oh, in true crime, boy, have the last couple years been good to you? First, there was the mega hit podcast serial which launched october 2014

several months later the hbo released the jinx six episode documentary blah blah blah captivating these um as captivating these programs were for the general public one group in particular has become particularly enthusiastic about the genre young women hmm it's weird and a lot of the victims are young women it's like well i don't know what it is hmm i don't and a lot of the victims are young women it's like I don't know what it is hmm I don't know

what's sort of like according to Dr. Howard Foreman a forensic psychiatrist at Montefiore Medical Center the trend is rooted in empathy by the time you

get to adulthood women are able to empathize with a greater degree than men on average Foreman tells Tech Insider this may lead to true crime being more a greater degree than men on average foreman tells tech inside of this may lead to true crime being more interesting to women than men simply because if you empathize

more with the victim it may be more relevant to you and more gripping and then if you empathize with the murderer you're in some trouble yeah like oh he did a good job it just was too i don't know it just got so dark and weird and yeah i had a guy in my when i was living with my ex-boyfriend in this in this uh apartment building there was this really weird kid who was so overly familiar and just really weird with me and i felt i really felt threatened by him i felt really uncomfortable with him i told the landlord you know my boyfriend was traveling a lot for work and stuff so i was alone a lot i had a bat he was like maybe 18 and you felt threatened by him he just was weird he was off asperger's eve very weird like

very just the way he looked at me was weird he overly complimented me in an inappropriate way i would set up boundaries he would keep coming he to, I was bringing my laundry up to my apartment and my boyfriend was out of town and he, the kid lived on a different floor than me. And he goes, oh, let me take your laundry. I go, no, no. And he goes, oh, let me take it. I go, no, I don't need your help. Very clear. And then he he the door opens to the elevator he tries to take my laundry i go no and then i get off the elevator and i start walking and he starts following me and i go you don't live on this floor and he goes oh sometimes i get off here and walk up i go no you don't you're not supposed to be on this floor and then i pretended to go into someone else's apartment because i couldn't let him know where i lived and then he left so that's when i called tate again

and he set me up with sc Epstein at 10th Planet, and that's when I started doing jujitsu, because I'm like, nobody's fucking with me anymore. There's no, I cannot control my surroundings. I cannot control that. All I can do is control my ability to. You don't live in the same building you were in? Jesus Christ.

Yeah, that's the thing that women have to deal with, and I have experienced it to a far lesser degree with creepy dudes who want to follow me in hotels oh yeah you have i've seen people people are so weird with you yeah it's weird they want to follow you in hotels though yeah like guys follow me into the elevator and want to come to my room like hey yeah they want to watch you jerk off they're like louie me please leave me alone once i'm near them they just want to stay close to me. People come up to you and they're so excited.

This is their moment. They're shivering. They're shaking. I watch it all the time. I told you I want to do a reaction where they just should have our faces, your friends' faces when people are approaching you. We're just all like, oh, my God. I mean, they do it on a smaller scale with other people too but i mean

you really have it they're always unfolding a paper they've always got something they need to share with you like this is their big chance to tell you whatever the thing is that they need to tell you i mean it is really their moment you're a part of people's biggest moment of their life all day long the biggest one is when they have a business pitch uh-huh it's the most frustrating i've seen it i'm like listen we are not going into business together yeah how do you know if you don't hear it because i don't have time to do what i'm doing already like and i'm already selling fanny packs i can't do more super busy with the fanny pack business higherprimate.com go there for all your fanny pack needs i died when

you told me you sold fanny packs yeahanny packs every month i have to keep restocking you're the king i don't even get it i sell a lot of fucking fanny packs they sell it crazy but they're really high quality i was living out of my car when you told me that it's a company called roots from canada they make them super high quality leather and i just get them to print it with a high higher primate logo on them but you know how I found out about this company and their excellent fanny packs? Did it involve anal sex? No, Dice Clay. Oh my God.

Dice Clay had a fanny pack on and I said, where did you get that glorious fanny pack? He's like, oh, you like it? Oh! And he showed it to me and I said,

this is fucking excellent. Can I go through? It's roots. There's nothing in there. There's nothing good. Chapstick? Yeah. It's CBD chapstick cbd huh that's the only one i fuck with i took some before i came so i didn't freak the fuck out does that help you oh there's something in here okay you're so rich joe you're so rich i was living in my car next to parking next to one of your cars that's it

right there see that roots fanny pack that's where i learned about it oh my god got the fucking beautiful fanny pack and then so what's the what makes yours yours well i bought it from the roots company i had them produce them for me and it's hard to see because it's kind of this is an older one so i've had this one for a few years but there's the higher primate logo that's embossed in the um can you get one that says annie fanny no but you can make it joe bring it somewhere will you let me some money yeah i will will you let me some money to make my fanny pack glitter on it it's uh yeah i should do like a craft thing it'll be fun should we have a

craft yeah we'll do a little craft show that's not hard puffy paints just do it with glue you paint it with glue and then you you sprinkle glitter all over it. Yeah. The glue will stick to glitter. I'm very glittery. Yeah, there you go. I don't think so. I try to wear hearts, though.

Dude, that's a good look for you. I'm trying to Elton John it. I watch this video of Elton John live all the time at- What are you showing me, Jamie? Guys, the trend of wearing them up here like this. How do you feel about that? Those people are cowards. They're young.

No, no, no, no, no. They can throw their. They're young. No, no, no, no, no. They can throw their- No, no, no, no, no, no, no. They are cowards. They don't want to wear it as a fanny pack. So they wear it over their shoulder because they're cowards. Yeah, and if a hot girl comes that doesn't like fanny packs, they can throw their elbow into it and pretend they're injured. No.

That's not what they're doing. I got to laugh. It's not a sling. They're doing it because they want the functionality of a fanny pack, but they don't want the social stigma. They're cowards. Well, it's a new, yeah, it's like the Jaden Smith. What's the Jaden Smith? I don't know.

It's like he would wear that. Would he? It's the younger, this is the younger generation. They've taken our fanny packs and they've made them into something else. Isn't he non-binary? Maybe. What is it saying at the bottom of that goofy picture with that coward and see-through iridescent zip okay fuck don't have a see-through bag by the way nobody wants

to see your tampons hide your purse maybe i don't know you never know with these young boys these days they're very woke they are woke they're so polite i was but there's all these women that want to get choked by bigfoot so i was reading this thing about yale and that yale put tampons in the men's room because they said not everyone who menstruates is a woman and i'm like yes they are i thought maybe they worked for diarrhea no yes everyone who menstruates is a woman scientifically we're getting i'm a woman right now can you tell wacky yeah it is it is a weird thing that's happening oh my god i'll call anyone whatever they want it's just a weird yeah i will too i have no problem i want i would i would love to make you happy as long as it doesn't it's so wacky well chapelle said that thing on his special where he said uh

um to what degree do i have to partake in your self-esteem right that's a good way of looking on it yeah yeah i mean it's but it's not just that it's it's an enforcement there's like an authoritarian enforcement of certain language and certain ways of communicating with people yeah you know there is a goddamn hilarious thing that tim pool posted up of a communist meeting where this woman is calling everyone comrades and this guy is like could everyone please stop moving because could you guys please stop moving because i have severe add and all this moving is really distracting me and the woman goes all right thank you comrade duly noted and then the guy goes please can you stop using gendered language when you say that it's very it's very offensive and like it is woke gone this is what i was saying

before about how it's like if you're expecting the world to accommodate to you, like your safe space is inside yourself. You fool. It's inside you. You don't have control of the outside world. This is people trying to control the language of everyone around them. And then saying it's unsafe if they don't follow your new vocabulary. That's an unfair thing. Do you find it?

And you're unfulfilling. It's an Asian lady. And he said, this can't be real. It's like two days ago he put it me uh sam harris reminded me of it it was real fucking howling laughing about it it's it's just it's like parody it's like the onion is not ridiculous enough i know like these people are more ridiculous than the most ridiculous parody like you can't even mock it but do you think that it is them

trying to see what they can get away with yes yes they're little kids how far can i go they're plain make-believe they're they're i'm a chicken you know someone was someone said this to me i can't remember what it was but that all of the the words the keywords that people are using now like triggered safe space they're autistic terms they're terms that people use with autistic children. Let's hear this. Play this. If we want to defeat capitalism, we are going to need a party that will organize working people to fight for the demands that we want and to win socialism.

Thank you so much. Quick point of privilege. Quick point of personal privilege. Guys, first of all, James Jackson, Sacramento, he, him. I just want to say can we please keep the chatter to a minimum I'm one of the people who's very very prone to sensory overload there's a lot of whispering and chatter going on it's making it very difficult for me to focus I know it's we're all fresh and ready to

go but can we please just keep the chatter to a minimum it's affecting my ability to focus thank you thank you. Okay, is there a speaker against name, chapter, pronoun? Point of personal privilege. Yes. Please do not use gendered language to address everyone. Okay. Look at that red-headed monster.

Where is he? Right in the lower right-hand corner with the halter top or whatever the fuck it is. See that with the red head red hair the crazy red hair that's the one that jumped up that's the he him she he's wearing that red so he's wearing that red so when he gets his period do not use gendered language this is this is where we're at we're at we're in nonsense land and people are acting like this is normal you're a bunch of babies what do you give a fuck if someone says yeah who cares what people said about you girls

say girls i could be there say girls i don't care this is you're you're crazy please do not use gendered language what how does that change anything and by the way if you can't if you can't deal with a bunch of people moving around and making noises and shit. Just stop. Just stop. Get the fuck out of there. Don't force everybody else to deal with your fucking weak mind. Go home. Go home.

Watch this on YouTube. Eat a steak. Do some squats. Eat a steak. Eat some elk. Get your fucking life in order, pipsqueak. All right. Go fuck a goddamn Bigfoot.

Go write a Bigfoot fuck book and make millions. What is this seminar about about being an asshole communism it's just it's just so it's like playing on this thing too where it's like i want people to feel good i was a special ed teacher i've done all these things the special ed kids wouldn't have been talking like this asking for all these things and well this is what they with these kids are calling socialism right like this is what i mean everyone has to be like super, super sensitive and aware of every single fucking thing they do.

And every single fucking thing that everybody around them does, everybody has to comply. And it keeps you a victim too, because it's impossible for that to happen. So no one's ever going to comply to everything you say. There's always going to be one person, even if they don't, even if they want to,

maybe they were listening to something else and they didn't know that that's what they were supposed to do or whatever. So then there's always going to be, you're always going to be a victim of something. Someone's always said the wrong thing. They've always done the wrong thing. And all of your worth is from something outside of yourself. And you now don't have to deal with your own. But also it ramps up what used to be acceptable a year ago.

Now is unacceptable. A year from now, it'll be something else. After a while, you won't even be able to say colored you're gonna have to say the c word right you're gonna have to say you can't say people of color which is a psc isn't people of color that's what that is a weird one like yeah like the ncaa or um naacp rather national association for the advancement of colored people which is bananas like you can't say that you can't even say that anymore it's like so dumb it's such a weird thing and also people i feel like if people stopped having attachment to words you could stop having them mean anything like they wouldn't hurt you well the lenny bruce

talked about that in the 60s it was one of his bits in the 60s he would he would call people by a bunch of ethnic slurs and then say, you know, the problem with not saying these words is that if you say these words enough time, they lose all their meaning and it's not going to hurt some kid's feelings. I'm paraphrasing. But this is the opposite of that. And you know what they did to him? Nothing. They turned him into a woman and Miss Maisel. Oh.

They rerouted him. What do you think of that show? They rebooted him. I've watched a little bit. think it's good i haven't watched um but it is weird right mrs mazel is him yeah she's the mother i auditioned for that and then when i saw her tits in the front i'm like my tits auditioned for her tits that's like amazing no but in the first scene she showed her tits i was like all right thank you thank you for getting me that audition i don't understand what you're. She showed her tits in the first scene.

Right. And I didn't realize that that was going to be in the scene. They didn't make me go topless or whatever, but I was honored to have been in the same audition pool as- Oh, okay. As Rachel Brosnahan and her big juicy tits. She looks great. She looks great.

She's really funny. She's good. She's a great actress. She is hilarious. But I was talking to a male comic who was really funny, and he was was like i don't like that fucking show because there was no woman like that back yeah there's no superman either man like what the fuck are you talking about there's no walking dead rick didn't kill any zombies yeah guess what it's all fake like does it really freak you out there was a woman comic like they're not saying it's a show about comedy right it's a funny show

about comedy you should be excited that there's a show about stand-up comedy in the 1950s and 60s. It's fucking great. Yeah. So what do you care if they made up a woman? Like, why? Well, they're not getting represented. The white men. It's not even that.

It's like a historical thing. Yeah. It was bothering him historically. It is that they are intersecting with real things that happened happen so i can see where that's a little annoying i don't want to bring up elton john again but i did see rocket man and it is it was weird when they were not if there are things that happened and you're why do you say bring up elton john again because i keep bringing him up yeah you just didn't even when did you bring him up earlier i've just been talking about him the whole time did she no i said i listened to elton john a lot did you yeah i

watched this one live video of him a lot i don't think you said that i wear it did did she no i listen to elton john a lot did you yeah i watched this one live video of him a lot i don't think you said that where i did did you yeah i forgot okay that's okay um i can only be expected to be listened to 20 of the time what was wrong with rocket man well it's just he didn't write the lyrics which they said but then the whole movie was like trying to force these life events into the lyrics so it was like but he didn't write it so he didn't write it so it just wasn't it didn't feel real i would have rather have heard more shit about when he married that woman and stuff he married a woman yeah he married a woman whoa yeah how frustrated was she she must have been really horny just sliding around in there she She probably didn't know.

She's probably rich. But I think probably maybe it was just a beard situation, you know? Yeah, I'm sure. But also. There's got to be a lot of those. There's a lot of guys that want to believe that they can be straight, you know? That's why they buy the Whitney Cummings dick doll. Ah!

But that's where, like, that all Pray the Gay Away stuff is. Oh, yeah. Have you ever heard of those pray the gay away camps where these guys are sitting around holding men with boners they literally get hard-ons holding you and telling you you're not gay yeah like hey what the fuck's going on back yeah it's fucking crazy it's like it's so wild to not be like just lean into what you are your happiness your joy yeah but think about yourself you were raised a quaker what if you raised some wildly homophobic christian you know anybody who does that is a satan worshiper and you're gonna go burn in hell and you live with all this guilt and sin feeling like that shame that you're

rotten or whatever i mean i definitely have my own shame and i know probably everyone carries them with them i can't imagine on that scale that sucks that is probably one of the biggest ones if you're raised christian though if you're raised like serious christian especially fundamental you know like it's one of the worst sins to lay with another man and and just dealing with it the dick that they must get at those camps though oh my god i mean they must just be pounding each other out they probably come so quick because they can't believe they're actually doing it. They're just like, and then they have that camaraderie in the fact that they both are trying to not be this thing. Oh, my God. I'm getting horny just talking about it, honestly.

I have a new genre. It's not Bigfoot. We have to work through this. I mean, I'm not gay and you're not gay, even though we just fucked. I know, just crying in each other's gay arms. What a sneaky trick if you believe in god that god did god said listen you cannot have sex with men but you're gonna want nothing you're really gonna want it you're gonna want that all day you're gonna see their juicy assholes all day you want it more than food you want it more than water you just want dick and butt dick and butt dude dick butt firemen and fucking cops

and construction workers and indians and cowboys and then a band's gonna come out and they're all gonna play each part and you're gonna have to try to not fuck them and then you can't even go to the ymca anymore yeah it's i mean if you really believe in jesus and you really believe that you shouldn't be gay but you are gay what a dirty trick god has played on you must be terrible i just feel like there's nothing more dangerous than repressed that's gotta be where cancer not just homosexuality but repressing any sort of feelings like that sure it's gotta be what cancer is well repressed sexuality is always strange like when i was in high school there was always these girls from catholic school and girls from catholic school that went to all girls

catholic schools were the biggest hoes i know they could anal doesn't count they couldn't wait to get some dick because it was so forbidden it was a forbidden fruit they just would get so excited they couldn't believe it was real just fighting off these hormones it's just a such a terrible trick to play on a young person yeah to tell them that their body is dirty and awful and that these thoughts that are just prevalent omnipresent in their mind are the wicked ways of the devil and that which you resist persists you know you're just thinking about that fucking butthole all day. Fucking sucking a dick. Fat, juicy hog.

You just can't have it. Yeah, I mean. It's terrible. It's really bad. It's also weird. If you're out there, listen. Let's just say, let God give you a hall pass. Go fucking asshole.

Yes. Go fucking asshole. Go suck a dick. Or just move to Boys Town and realize you're going to be fine. There's a group of them. They get together and they have a great old time there's a parade and they're so happy if you go down that street it's so happy they're free they don't even their shoulders are exposed like there's just tank tops everywhere just hair shaved anything you want just every time i love going i feel invisible

it's amazing i love i could just i could walk bottomless and they would just i've talked to gay guys so they get mad that straight guys or and straight girls are going to gay clubs now to hang out that it's like a weird thing cultural appropriation yes talk to martindale well i could see where you'd be like where you'd be like hey this was like our place to fuck and now you're here like you're wearing glitter yeah get the fuck you're wearing rainbows remember dimitri martin had that joke about where he's like um gays just get i can't i'm paraphrasing but gays just get rainbows that's not fair you just get fractured light like greedy greedy gays i mean this is what back in the day when you could say stuff like that yeah i had a bit about that was pretty similar about that they it was

because of duck dynasty one of the guys from duck dynasty was giving i don't get it i don't understand what gate and my bit was like listen you should shut the fuck up or the gay people will take over camo the same way they took the rainbow oh that's so funny they own the rainbow the rainbow used to be leprechauns used to be lucky charms guy yeah now it's gay people to the point where if i came on stage with a fucking rainbow t-shirt on people would be like i knew it i knew it we've been waiting for this moment i fucking knew it but um the idea was that if uh like what all the gay guys would have to do is start every gay porn in a duck blind. Oh, my God.

Every gay porn would start with a... That's so funny. They're wearing camo and they're duck hunting. And then someone would come in, a black guy would come in and go, something about duck hunting made me horny. That like duck whistle thing? Oh, my God. My friend worked on, my friend Mike, who I stayed with, worked on Duck Dynasty.

So he knows all those guys. What does he say? That seemed like a trip. Are they butt fucking all the time when no one i don't think so but you know it is funny when you take just a family and then you make them stars and they you know they cross between reality and yeah all that stuff and then they go crazy and then they all of a sudden they're on their own and they get interviewed and they say something really crazy do you know what i mean yeah the minute they're not yeah some tmz guy puts a camera in their face yeah are they still doing that show i don't think so how could they stop it seems like it was just printing money yeah i wonder i mean maybe they are i know my friend doesn't work for them anymore but yeah are they still doing duck dynasty yeah i don't know i give him the credit for duck dynasty whether he wants or not I don't think so.

Yeah, I don't know how. I give him the credit for Duck Dynasty, whether he wants it or not. I don't know how that show. Final episode, March 29th, 2017. How does that show end, ever? It feels like a smart producer should step in and go, hey, guys, it's been a couple of years. I'm sure you've had a lot of wacky stories. Falls asleep with a cigarette in their mouth.

I don't know. It's gone. All of years. I'm sure you've had a lot of wacky stories. Someone falls asleep with a cigarette in their mouth. I don't know. It's gone. All that camo gone. It's weird. If you watch that show, it's like there's nothing compelling about it at all, but it was an enormous hit. Yeah. Just a bunch of people doing duck stuff. There is something about reality TV, though, where you're just like, it's so thoughtless.

Yeah. You just don't have to. You're just being taken on this dumb dumb ride and you're just like it's just it's nothing happening it's like all right mate next thing you know you're watching people dissect a storage container yeah but you know what i really like is survivor that one i still like survivor i still like survivor i think is the number one reality show because it's making people it's taking away all of their comforts and they still have to communicate with each other play games with each other they have to they're starving they have to do these physical it's still you're watching people be like tested and put what season is that on oh my god my god There's so many seasons

It's like season 1 million I've seen all of them It's so good I don't pay attention To them fully So I can rewatch them At some point I've watched them

A couple times That show was on Before Fear Factor So we started Fear Factor in 2001 So that show was Probably on in 2000 Yeah

And 19 years later It's in the 30s now 30 seasons Or something 33rd yeah i'm embarrassed i don't know because that's how much is it still a hit yeah it's amazing listen people either are on to survivor or they're not well they've actually done 38 episodes or seasons somehow it says but this is the 30th yeah they do several a year now is it uh still jeff probst it's still jeff probst he's still the host? It's still Jeff Probst. He's still the host. He's still under the radar. Like, Jeff Probst just, like, gets those checks and stays home.

And, yeah, but here's the deal. I've seen him driving around. He had his little summer fedora. He was riding in his Prius. I was like, so safe. He drives a Prius? This was, like, three years ago. I saw him driving around.

Stockpiling all the cheese? Yeah, maybe he's rich dad, poor dad. No, I mean, he must have all his money just stocked away. He's driving around in a Prius. I love the show. It's so good. Maybe he knows that they could take this away from him at any moment. If somebody replaced him, would you notice?

Is he an integral part of the show? I think people would be upset. They would be upset. People would be upset. What if Mario Lopez took his spot? I think people would be very upset. I think they'd be extra upset. What if Adam Carolla took a spot?

They would get canceled. People would be like, Trump, no! Is he a Trump supporter? I think so. Adam? I think so. But I don't know for, listen, I don't know for sure. I don't want to call anyone anything.

I think he's conservative. I think he is a Trump supporter, though. Some people get conservative when they start making money, though. Listen, everyone has the right to be whatever the fuck they are oh you think i think so what about nazis they have the more of a right a third right i don't think that's right i think it's something that's a different word right what does that even mean what is third reich i don't know i don't even literally don't i mean i know what the third reich is but i don't even know what it means take a guess i literally have no idea what that means i know it means the nazis right i don't know third reich but what does it mean

can german but isn't that a funny thing like that's like third reich is like everyone knows nazis but no one knows what the fuck that means. The etymology. Yeah. You with the big words. I know a few. What does it mean? Third regime or empire or third realm. Huh. So the third version of the Nazi party? First was the Holy Roman Empire, which lasted until 1806.

The second would be 1871 to 1918. And this was the third. Interesting. So they were just just they were considering themselves to be the third rulers of the world like the romans interesting yeah what a mess and the crazy thing is that that was not that long ago it was not that long not even 100 years ago not that long ago at all have you ever seen the video of hitler tweaking at the 1936 Olympics. Twerking? Tweak. Like speed. He was on serious speed. We were with Brian Moses.

Brian Moses was saying that Hitler was into bull semen. And I was like, what? And he's like, yeah. And then we found out that taurine, which is in Red Bull, actually is from bull semen. Oh, my God. That's so fun. That's why I like Red Bull. Look at this.

That's Hitler. Tweaking. Oh, my God. look at him go. He is straight up tweaking at the Olympics. So he was on all kinds of crazy speed. And then we read this thing about how he was incredibly fatigued and almost dying. And he got injected with testosterone and cocaine and oxycodone. Wasn't going to make that dick grow.

And then went and talked Mussolini out of leaving the war. Because Mussolini wanted to get the fuck out of World War II. And Hitler went and just talked at him for five hours. Just, ah, all coked up and oxycodoned out and bull cum dripping down his throat. Oh, my God. Yeah. How did he extract the bull cum I don't know

But bull semen Apparently has This taurine stuff in it And they extract taurine From some other method To make the taurine It's in red bull Actually that's what

The guys at the Pray the gay away camp do That's their Take it away from the tap They're extracting it If you suck a bull's dick You deserve all that Well do you remember

I always think about that horse oh yeah in zoo the documentary that documentary is amazing that video of the i'm so trying and the part that i'm traumatized by is not the fucking part okay no and do you remember the scene okay so he gets up on the bucket right and then you know they need like several people to grab this giant horse cog and put in his ass and then the horse rams him only once and then he goes this is the part that got me he goes he looks back and he goes did he come

like he was so concerned if the horse came I was like oh my god yeah and the guy made a noise like like a noise where you're dying cause you got fucked to death by a horse he was he died so soon after and then his friend goes too much too much like did you get too much did you get too much horse dick and he did he died

if you look at the math the size of a horse dick oh i have the size of a body cavity it's like where is it going yeah what's getting out of the way to make room for that dick oh boy they dropped him off at the at the hospital they rolled him out he was bleeding he bled out he had bled out from his asshole and that's how he died happy i don't think he did you don't think he was like maybe this was worth it i don't think if the horse had come do you think he would have been worth it he would have thought it was worth it the horse did come but do you know that this whole thing they had hundreds and hundreds of hours of footage of him getting fucked by donkeys and horses and a bunch of other people that these people had met online and the zoophilia right is the the medical

terminology for someone who's sexually attracted to farm animals and so or animals period and so these people all met online in some chat room and then decided to get together in washington state where it was still legal to fuck animals there's like only a few states where it's okay it's so funny that you had there has to be a law yeah there has to be a law are you just so happy that's not what you're into i'm just like i just wake up so grateful and blessed i go thank god right could you imagine if that was your your oh thank god thank you you can't control that right if you get some like some people are in defeat some people are into getting fucked oh segwaying into feet huh yes people are in defeat have you heard i've heard they're in defeat i can't believe it well i was reading up on it that it's the part

of the brain that that handles your genitals and your feet are right next they're adjacent so sometimes the why they think that the wires get crossed because and the guy that studied it was a guy who um studied uh phantom limb syndrome and he was so he was following these people's brains where they would feel that they still had a foot or whatever and some guys would get horny it would get their brain so it was just like crossed huh we get horny thinking of their own knot foot it's hilarious how you pixelate your feet and all those pictures really it's funny how'd that get started they just people were they started a wiki feet account for me i just didn't know if my feet were a thing

i just didn't know i thought i was just walking around in you know in slides didn't know i was walking around i may as well just have been bottomless i may as well have just been wearing like pajama bottoms with the ass flap backwards open just put i mean my little feet pussies just walking around so then um once people i noticed the wiki feet thing and then people were dming me all the time to see my feet and i just was like you don't get this if you talk to her dms? Whitney shares DMs with us sometimes. That's so funny. There's a group chat I'm in with Nick Swartzen, Crystalia, and Whitney,

and she'll post pictures of her DMs. It's like, what in the fuck? Yeah, they're wild. I do a thing on my podcast and on my live stream sometimes where I sage my pussy at the end of the night. Sage it? I get sage,

and I just, yeah, I just to break the the negative dick cords that were sent to me the unwanted dick cords from all these dudes i'm like yeah put your dick cords away nice but you know people are pervs what are you gonna do i just make fun of them but it's more guys that are pervs than girls that are pervs with stuff like feet and stuff yeah i guess they're a thing that girls are into that's kind of gross money it's so gross but that makes sense like money can keep you don't like your job some people are into like a guy with money fat guy some people are into i don't know it's people are into all different things but but not in the same way it's not the same you're right it's not the same some

guys are into fat girls too but there's a big difference between that and feet men are just very gross you're gross but it's biologically your between that and feet men are just very gross you're gross but it's biologically your dicks are just you're just ruled your dicks are just dragging you through the world right and it's just got to be acknowledged we can't pretend this isn't a thing true just dragging you it's just that's not we're like breastfeeding and shit we're thinking about other shit in uh archery there's a term called uh front of center, meaning how much weight is in the front of the arrow. It determines how much penetration the arrow will have on an animal. I'm getting so horny.

This is so weird. What are you talking about? It's like the thing with dicks. It's like dicks are like your front of center. It's like dragging you forward. No, they're just – I feel like you guys should be like holding yourselves back through doorways because your dicks are pulling you through things. And it makes life a lot easier when you just realize that. But I think it's like I just have only grown up a girl, so I just didn't.

I knew, obviously, because I've had a lot of sexual attention even very young. But it's just like your dicks are a thing. They're a fucking thing. Well, there's a reason why there's 7 billion people. It's not because of it's not necessarily because women are that horny right i think it's just dudes are trying so hard to fuck i know your body's compelled i mean this is a evolutionary thing and it used to be really hard to stay alive yeah not that long ago yeah and now it's really easy and we're kind

of left with the burden of this shift. Yeah, we haven't. Our brains and our biology hasn't really caught up to the fact that we don't need to have as many people as we used to. We used to have a 50% mortality rate amongst children. It was very difficult to survive. And I think that's also well- That was just in China, too. think that's also that was just in china too you're seeing more shifting with um you know like like those those guys in that video these beta guys the one guy calling out for people to stop being distracting and the other one calling out for people to stop using gendered language like

who are they well they wouldn't survive if there was a uh you know the roman army was invading like they would have never made i wonder who's fucking them nobody nobody maybe they're just men that aren't driven by that you know no that's not true that's just as good as they can get they just genes circumstances they're getting attention and stuff from it yes it's a mess they're a mess it's so weird how much survival how much of our like caveman shit is still there and how much of the survival stuff like i've been doing a listening to a lot of therapy podcasts there's this one called the adult chair it's this woman michelle chalfant and she's just it's all about dealing like with your inner child and then all and all of your instincts she has like the adolescent chair and the adult chair and your adolescent chair is

all of your ego and your emotions and your fight fight or flight like all of that the stuff that you do the procrastination whatever is your problem like why is that happening there's something that's coming from either your child chair or something from your childhood or things like socially when you have social anxiety and panic attacks and stuff so much of it could be just back from in the days if you were excommunicated from your tribe like you would die yes if you weren't a part of the club you would fucking die whitney cummings we're still in that that that's the reason why people are afraid of public speaking is that when you were speaking in front of a group you were trying to save your life you were trying to plead your case for the most part unless you were the leader of tribe, most of the people were just trying to say,

please, I didn't know and don't kill me. Is that how you feel walking around? Me? No. No, but some people do. At the comedy store, people are like, merciful king. No. You know how I feel walking around?

I feel like they don't have anybody. Here's the way to put it. When you are listening to someone all the time and that person's in your ear, that person becomes like a weird part of your life. And then you meet them and you're like, whoa, this is crazy that you're right here. I've experienced that. When I first met Anthony Bourdain, I was weirded out. I was like, I can't believe you're right here.

This is so weird. And I've gotten used to that Over time But still It's strange When I meet famous people Yeah You know

When I meet And it's even weirder When I meet famous people And they know me I'm like Yeah Okay Yeah

And then we become famous people together Like hi famous person Let's hug it out Yeah I've seen that before It's fucking strange When two famous people just see And then you're just already

You're already in this weird club Of famous people It's strange Yeah Automatically famous people just see and then you're just already you're already in this weird club of famous people it's strange yeah automatically famous people club well it's it's not a normal state and it's not i mean and people that are that enjoy the podcast it becomes a part of their life and maybe it benefits them and maybe they start getting motivated and cleaning up their life and start being healthier and exercising and eating better. And then it becomes almost like a religion kind of thing. Because it becomes the thing that you think of in terms of how to benefit your life, how to live in a positive way.

You think about the things you learned on the podcast almost like you would look at a religious doctrine. You look at the teachings of Christ. You look at the teachings of Moses you know you look at the teachings of moses or you look at like oh what ronda patrick said right yes oh well you know what graham hancock was talking your voice is like in their head you're like a unhired coach well there's a little bit of that it's and it's also represents my own quest to try to figure out my own life and to do it publicly and explain what i've learned and how i failed what i've gotten better at it helps other people when you hear that because you go okay i'm not

alone like i'm because people think that if like your life is in order right now that it's always been like that so i think it really helps people to hear like oh i used to be a fucking loser yeah and i did and i used to be scared to talk to bank tellers and it was true yeah i used to be a fucking loser. Yeah. And I did. And I used to be scared to talk to bank tellers. And it was true. Yeah. I used to be weirded out socially. I was very strange. Now can they hear your voice over the cha-ching, cha-ching, cha-ching?

Cha-ching? Because you're rich. Oh. That's in your head. You're so rich. You're my richest friend. Am I? Probably.

I'm guessing. Probably. I can't imagine who's richer. Well, someday you'll be rich too. And we'll laugh. I can't wait. We'll laugh together.'ll be rich too i can't wait we'll laugh you have laughed at me before will you get those same kind of glasses but surround them with diamonds because yeah i want to get jewels i could see those how long do you think it's going to take

to surround them with diamonds yeah just order them you don't even think about it because you're too busy doing other things i'm so busy yes so busy are you uh culture appropriating with those hoop earrings? Because I don't think that's. Have you heard my joke about that? No. About how I got accused of cultural appropriation for wearing these hoops? It's hilarious.

Because. Who accused you? My best friend. She's black. But I did. I did slide them off her neck. She's African. I do want to be a part of her tribe.

That's the joke. That is the craziest shit When they stretch their neck out With those things I know I'm like This is when you can get mad At the Jenners for cultural preparation Is when they have the lip plate

You know what I mean When they come with the Stretched out thing Surrey women Yeah It's just Cultural preparation's a weird I don't know

I think we should All be dressing alike I think it's cool That we all should be I think people should be I mean you shouldn't be like Disrespecting's culture and stuff, but I don't know what. It just seems like.

Most of what we're calling cultural appropriation today is people looking for a reason to complain. Yeah. Cultural appropriation is one of the reasons why cities are so interesting because we share each other's food. We share each other's clothes and listen to each other's music and, you know, wear each other's jewelry. It's nonsense. And what's interesting is like how many people from America are upset about things,

but then when people from China or Japan find out that we're wearing Japanese geisha clothes. We also do bukkake? They're so pissed. No, they like it. They're happy. But there is, wouldn't you? I feel like there's been times where I've just done stuff online. I'll have a bit or whatever, and then someone else starts doing it and you don't you get mad at that well that's different not a bit not a joke i mean just like a thing i'm doing

well that's different because then you feel like someone's copying you you know whatever i just make another time but then some people some people get mad like oh i'm doing a podcast now he's doing a podcast so you copy me like hey fuck face you don't own podcasts that's ridiculous i have a podcast that's called the joe rogan experience that's fine i've literally had that conversation with people where they were like mad but now he's doing a podcast i'm like what are you talking about stupid there's 600 000 also it just doesn't have to do with you just focus aim your arrow bitch like handle your own life it's it's so with your own shit i have lived as a victim for many years it's there is a benefit to it because you're always fed it you know if you are looking at the world like you're a victim

you will be given everything you need please don't stop using gender exactly you're gonna be so everyone's gonna be disappointing you everyone's gonna be upsetting you or you can just accept some fucking responsibility and it feels so good you know it feels good it does feel good yeah i mean it feels good to be calm and to to just be at peace and you know there's a lot of work involved in that you gotta fucking you gotta meditate you gotta iron out your own stuff you gotta exercise It's a progress Work in progress Yes we all are I'm fucking trying man We all are

I'm fucking trying I have to wrap this up If anybody wants to see you You are at the Comedy Store On a regular basis You got any other dates I'm at the Comedy Store On a regular basis

I'm at the Blue Room In Missouri What's the Blue Room? Let's look it up right now Is it a city in Missouri? Or is it just You have to find it in the state It's a Blue Room? Let's look it up right now. Is it a city in Missouri or is it just you have to find it in the state?

It's a big state. Is there a place? Let's look it up. All right. I should have had this ready. You don't even know where you are? When is this? It's Springfield, Missouri.

Talk in the microphone. It's in Springfield, Missouri. When is that? It is not this weekend, next weekend. It is on August 17th and 18th do you have a website where people can find i do annieletterman.com and annie letterman on instagram instagram i'm also at go bananas october the third weekend in october which one go bananas in cincinnati beautiful um the end of october second to last weekend i should have Which one? Go Bananas in Cincinnati. Beautiful.

The end of October, second to last weekend. I should have filed these already. And my new podcast. Yes. Me Inspiration on all things comedy. What is it called? Me Inspiration? Me Inspiration, yeah.

Okay. Annie, thank you. Thank you, Joe. Good to see you, my friend. I'll see you at the store. Yeah, I'll see you tonight. Bye, everybody. Bye, guys.

That was fun.