The Joe Rogan Experience - #174 - Eddie Bravo, Dr. Steve Graham

Episode Date: January 9, 2012

Joe sits down with Eddie Bravo and Dr. Steve Graham.

All I got was an all day. I was having the most amazing Onnit experience right there, watching Aubrey in the background, and then you talking about Onnit products at the exact same time. You were having an experience? Onnit AlphaBrain. That was pretty... Was it weird?

Yeah. You're high, buddy. You're high. You just smoked a giant bong rep, and you're talking about AlphaBrain? AlphaBrain didn't do that Sorry, how dare you I'm sure that your text message What is that? That's Zelda Zelda yeah, you know you could change your text tones by going in

Like choosing a ringtones on your phone and you can go to the store and buy your own Notifications on it and everything like they have everything. Yeah, my phone just vibrates. I'm not one of those annoying shitheads that has his phone fucking going off with little Zelda alarms. Well, you don't use it as an alarm or anything, do you? I do. When I use it for an alarm, the standard alarm is fine with me. I don't need to hear some sort of... Do you hear a specific song when you wake up?

Is that what you do? Well, it's the opening theme to Zelda. That's how you wake up? Yeah. So when you're in a hotel room, you're like, oh, life is a game. I wake up in fairy room. I don't even know what Zelda is. I've heard the name,

but I've never played it. You play all those wacky little... No, that was one from when I was a kid. Yeah. That's like, you know, you grew up with the old Nintendo, and that's one of the games that came with type thing.

Eddie Bravo's in the house. Yeah. That was a sweet video, man. Thank you very much, man. It was was really sweet that's got a lot of hits already right there's like 50 something thousand hits fifty four thousand as of January 9th I'm sure after this podcast it'll go over a hundred thousand yeah that's a that's a badass thing to be able to do to do do common with a bunch of friends that also do jiu-jitsu. Everybody in my band, everybody, my guitar player, Tim,

both my rappers, Compella and Alex, and Alder, the DJ, they're all my brown belts. They're all in the band. So when we play live, don't fucking spit. So when we play live, don't fucking spit. You know, because not only is everyone on stage a trained assassin, but most of the people in the audience are like my students, too. So it's filled with our own little secret service.

Well, if somebody wanted to start a gang war between jiu-jitsu schools, that's what they do. Come to one of your shows. It would be like an old Karate Kid movie. Yeah, and the guest rapper on that song, Raka, he's been doing jiu-jitsu for about 10 years now at the Gracie Academy in Torrance with Henner, Heron, and Halleck. And we just hooked up one night.

It was just one night. We dropped that verse one night in the studio. He showed up, and we got hooked up by a guy named Adisa. He hooked us up. He's a hip hop journalist who also trains up at half Gracie's. He's really, he's really good at jujitsu as well. He, he linked us up and we just, we're just sitting in the studio and I played him a couple tracks and I wanted him to pick the best of the three. I knew he was going to pick this one, though, because this was my favorite song as well. So he was down for it, and we thought, what the hell is this going to be about? And it just had to be about jiu-jitsu.

I mean, he did jiu-jitsu. And Adisa's— Did you guys do anything about any other subjects besides jiu-jitsu? Oh, yeah. Most of our songs have nothing to do with jiu-jitsu. No, but you guys did a bunch of songs together. No, no, just me and Raka. That was our only song.

That's the only song we worked on. And we just thought, you know, because Adisa, I was looking at it as me producing a rapper. But Adisa, the guy who hooked us up, was looking at it. It's like, dude, you know what's going on? It's 10th Planet producing a song for Gracie Jujitsu. It's 10th Planet and Gracie coming together. And I'm like, I guess. I guess that's right.

Most people have no idea what this means. There's a bunch of different schools of jiu-jitsu, and there's disputes and rivalries and shit. Have you ever seen anybody get put in a double knee bar? A double knee bar? Double knee bar. Yes, that's a Russian cowboy. Not in an MMA fight, but that's the Russian cowboy.

Check this out. I'm going to show you. Play that video. Play Cyborg's first fight. First of all, yeah, I forwarded to you. If you don't know, there's this woman who's like this fucking badass

MMA fighter. Her name is Christine Cyborg Santos, and she's a fucking killer, man. I mean, she's fun to watch. She could probably beat dudes, like professional fighters. Yeah, she's terrifying. I mean, she's a fucking badass. She's super tough tough and she's like really really yoked you know she's like super built well she got popped for uh some sort of um um metabolite we're going to talk to a doctor

about it in a couple of minutes uh she got popped for this some sort of metabolite and apparently what she's saying is somebody gave her something in training and she didn't know what it was and they said it would help her cut weight, you know, which is, you know, very possible. But what we're looking at right now is a video. And what is the name of the video, Brian? It is that. Erika Pais versus Christina Cyborg.

What is the way you spell that chick's name? E-R-I-C-A, last word, P-A-E-S, versus Christine Cyborg. Well, this is her first MMA fight. And if you watch the fight, like if you're watching it and you see her body, it's a totally different body. She's a girl. Look, you see the chick is going to get her, she's going to get gotten a double knee bar. That's how she loses the fight.

But she fights a jiu-jitsu girl from a Brazilian top team. And so the chick has side control on her right now. And if you look at Cyborg's body, like, look at her legs. Those are a woman's legs. Cyborg's the one on the ground? Cyborg's the big one standing up. Oh, okay. I mean, look at her body.

I mean, she's obviously in shape, but it's nothing like she looks now. Look at that. Look at that. That's a woman's body. You see what I'm saying? Like the shoulders, the arms. The way she looks now is so much more muscular and so much more masculine.

Look at that. She's tapping there. I mean, oh, she's going to tap again. Look at this bitch got her a double knee bar. Look at that. Isn't that crazy? That's the Russian cowboy. That's what it's called?

Yeah. Call it Thursday. Now, I'm not a doctor, and I can't tell you what the fuck she did. I love watching that chick fight. I'll tell you that. I don't know what she takes. I can't say that, but I'm a fan of Cyborg. I think she's awesome to watch fight, man.

She's so aggressive, and her Muay Thai is so ruthless, you know? I love watching chicks like that fight. She fights, to me, she fights like a female Vanderlei, you know? I love watching chicks like that fight. She fights, to me, she fights like a female Vanderlei, you know? And I don't know what you can do with just your body. I don't know. I don't know what a chick can do. I don't know how strong they can get. I mean, maybe when she

was in that video, she never lifted any weights at all, and then she, you know, after she got double knee barred, she said, fuck this, I'm gonna start throwing some tires around and shit and get bigger. But, man, I don't know. So we're going to talk to a doctor. And this doctor is going to explain everything.

Did you get his shit? Her arms were kind of cut in that fight, though. She wasn't completely. Here, I'll forward it to you, Brian. Hold on. Yeah, no, I mean, but it's a totally different person. Yeah. I mean, didn't it look like a totally different body?

Yes. She's definitely massive now. Yeah. She's, uh, she's much harder, you know, much, uh, much, uh, Is her name Cyborg back then? I don't know. Her husband's name is Cyborg. She's married to another badass, a dude who fights for Strikeforce,

who's a legend. He had a fight with Melvin Manhoef, man. You ever watch that fight? The cyborg Manhoef fight? It was from Cage Rage. God damn, it was awesome. God damn, it was a fucking crazy fight. They just went back and forth.

I did see it, but I don't remember. Holy shit. I believe Manhoef won. But it was a fucking war. A crazy war. One of the best stand-up battles, I think't remember. Holy shit. I believe Manhoef won. But it was a fucking war. A crazy war. One of the best stand-up battles, I think, ever. Him, a cyborg. Wow, what's up?

You're crazy. You and your sound effects. Nobody likes those. You need to stop it with those sound effects. Hello? Steve, we're calling you right now.'s up brother i'm here we're uh we're uh live on the podcast with dr graham dr graham first of all what's up buddy how are you brother i'm doing real well joe thanks um what's up steve this is eddie

this is eddie what's up man can you not hear us? Eddie, how are you doing? How are things? Everything's beautiful, man. Our Skype connection is not so good. I'm on a sofa. Is there something better when I do that? No, it's fine right now. Hey, so we wanted to ask you about this since we just uncovered, actually, someone sent me, Mike Russell just sent me thanks to Mike, just sent me

a video of Cyborg's first fight and man you should see the difference, it's really crazy, she was much thinner, she really put on weight, you know and she got caught for some sort of a metabolite or something

inside of her system, now how does that work man, how does that work? She said that it came from a dietary supplement that someone was giving her something to help cut weight, which is totally possible, right? Like somebody can give you something, and you think that it's a diuretic, and it turns out it's some sort of a steroid. If you're not paying attention to the things people are giving you, that is possible, right? I feel it is possible, yeah. things people are giving you. That is possible, right?

I feel it is possible, yeah. I did a Google search, best I could, for any products that might contain tenosylol, and at least commercially available. I didn't find anything that was commercially available. Now, somebody might have something compounded that has tenosylol in it, which is entirely possible, but I imagine it would have to have a reasonable amount because for it to have any significant benefits, you probably have to give it at least 25 milligrams a day. It acts as a diuretic, too, by the way. It's not just a cutting agent to help people lose fat without losing muscle, particularly

in the latter phases of a steroid stack. So what they're saying actually makes sense, that Stenosolol could be used to cut weight. Yes, absolutely. And it is used to cut weight without losing muscle mass. So what it does is, like, as you diet and starve yourself and dehydrate yourself, your muscle stays thick? That's correct, and hard. Stenosolol is kind of used specifically not for gaining a lot of muscle mass,

but for making the muscle mass that you currently have real defined and hardened. Huh. So would it be something that a chick might take because she doesn't want to take anything that turns into a man? In fact, it is the anabolic steroid of choice for chicks. And is it because of that, because it doesn't make them too manly? Yes, it has very little androgenic effect, turning into giving you man-like features.

It also doesn't change to estrogen. It doesn't aromatize to estrogen, which would cause you to retain water like the other steroids do. So it has all the components to it for a woman and for a guy who, in the latter phase before some kind of competition, wants to lose weight and not to compromise the muscle mass and the strength that they have put on. So you're saying this compound doesn't make you look like a man?

Not as much, you're saying this compound doesn't make you look like a man? Not as much, you're saying. Compared to the other hormones, the other anabolic hormones, it is very non-masculinizing. That and Anabar are the two that are the most gentle. Now, how much mass can a woman put on on that kind of stuff? Can she get to a build like Cyborg? Or does Cyborg just have, I mean, what is your take? You see a woman like that.

Is that just a woman who has great genetics, who started lifting weights and put on all that mass? Or is there something else going on? Well, if I didn't know, if you just put a picture of somebody in front of me that kind of looked like Cyborg the way she did years ago and the way she does now. Wow. I know nothing about her.

I'd say that's probably a person that has used at least a number of stacked anabolic agents, which a windstraw would probably be one of them, at least at the end of each cycle. You know, if it wasn't for her original photos and video, I wouldn't lean towards that as much. Looking at that original video, it's so radically different, like the thickness in her body and her shoulders and everything like that. How much mass can a woman put on? I mean, is it possible that she can be the way she's built?

You mean how much mass can a person put on without steroid help? Yes. That's probably very genetically limited I can't tell you specifically but from person to person there's a genetic limitation on that you know you can only you can't increase the number of muscle cells that you have without using growth hormone but all the anabolic steroids including testosterone project to increase the size of the muscle cells that you have by the time you reach maturity. To have such significant thickness and muscle gain without help, it's possible, but there's a genetic limitation to it.

And this is the big difference between men and women. I've seen men put on way more weight than that. Totally legit with no steroids at all. Absolutely. I'm not saying it can't be done. I'm just saying that for every individual person, there's probably a different genetic limitation as to how much they're able to put on

naturally. Yeah, there's a photo of her we're looking at right now, man, where she just looks like a shaved wild ape. She's got her mouth open, and she's screaming, and she's a badass chick, though, man. She can fucking fight her ass off. You know, it's kind of unfortunate that this has happened. You know, the last thing anybody wants to see is chicks taking things to start looking like men.

And we don't know whether or not she did or not. If she says that somebody gave her something, I mean, who the fuck knows, man? Somebody might have been giving her something this whole time, and she didn't even know what she was taking. Look at the size of her. My God. We're looking at a photo of her. Yeah, we're looking at a photo.

Oh, like somebody can compound it and just stick it in their Wheaties, and she doesn't even know? We're looking at a photo. Like somebody can compound it and just stick it in their Wheaties, and she doesn't even know. We're looking at photos. Here's a dietary agent, her trainer or someone says, hey, I have a compounding pharmacist. He says this stuff will make you lose a good deal of weight without compromising your muscles and stuff like that. Okay, sure, I'll take that.

Her body is incredible, man. You would love to have a body like that, wouldn't you, Eddie? I would love to have body like that wouldn't you eddie i would love it i think the crazy thing is that not that she got popped but why it took so long i mean so you you think for sure she was on some shit of course of course i think serena williams this is why i wouldn't say that i I think Serena Williams could get as big as her and not be on. Wait a minute. Did one of the Williams get popped? Do one of the Williams gets popped for steroids?

Hold on a second. Before I say that. First of all, I don't. I like the, you know, that that people have athletes, fighters. They have a way to recover from. They train so hard, man. I have nothing. i have nothing i have nothing against this is anybody taking performance enhancers this is what happened one of the one of

the sisters uh she ducked a mandatory drug test they showed up at her house for mandatory drug tests and she called the police she called the police and then hid in her safe room yeah she has a safe room in her house. Wow, a genius. Yeah, that's a girl. It's the steroid room. Who knows? But I mean, you look at... You can't draw any conclusion from that.

Yeah, well, yeah. Damn it. I was going to say that I think they're all natural, but you know, man, you talk to some people that are like super cynical. There's some people

that are involved in like high-end athletics that will tell you that no one's all natural, that every single guy at the highest levels of the sport is doing something. I know you have experience in the sport, and just professional athletics as well. For people who don't know, Steve was on the U.S. ski team.

He's been an athlete his whole life. I've known Steve since the early 80s when Steve got into taekwondo, and I met him back in Boston. So you've been around combat sports for fucking decades and decades. So what is your take on it? I mean, what percentage of people do you think are on things? I would say at the highest end of each sport, I would probably say a large percentage, probably the majority,

are on some kind of either performance-enhancing drugs or at least to the extent that it helps them heal from injuries, which is really so common in combat sports. I mean, gosh, everything gets ripped apart and broken. Would you prefer, as a doctor, as a professional who understands the risks and rewards, as a professional who understands the risks and rewards, would you prefer things like steroids to be able to be prescribed by doctors so that people can recover from injuries quicker and then have them approved by athletic commissions

for things like that? Do you think that it could be regulated or do you think it should just be outright banned totally? They should go deep with testing and get into, like which way do you lean do you lean towards like making things a little bit more liberal or do you lean towards eliminating any sort of performance enhancing drugs well i'd make it more liberal if it's a one or the other i'd definitely go towards being more liberal you know under supervision and if

the athletic associations uh the different state athletic commissions and the athletic associations, the different state athletic commissions, and the World Anti-Doping Association, and the IIAF, the International Association of Athletic Generations, all got together and said, hey, at the level these people are competing at and working at on their own,

they're tearing their bodies down. And if we can establish a limit, and just like WADA does and the Olympics do, like Serena Williams, they show up at your door and you've got to take tests. And if you miss more than a couple, then it's presumed that you're screwing them. But I think optimizing levels of these anabolic steroids, natural levels of them, is probably the way to go. I mean, nothing in the abuse range, because that's bad for your heart, liver, and multiple other things.

So I certainly lean way towards optimization of those hormones. So you believe that they should be used judiciously, that someone should be monitoring it, and that it can be actual an aid to athletic performance without being what you would think of as cheating or hyperhuman is that what you're saying exactly exactly yep that's a weird thing to define though because you know why i always looked at there's some guys you look at like a guy like quentin rampage jackson that guy obviously has a lot of testosterone i mean he just is a really

he's got a fantastic build for mma You know, he's got this iron jaw. You look at his face. I mean, that guy's jaw is wider than anybody's in the UFC. I mean, nobody takes a better punch than Quentin. That's a fucking man. You know what I'm saying? Tamden McCrory did not get the same genetics that Quentin Jackson got. Tamden McCrory got a whole different set of genetics.

Tamden McCrory's a bad motherfucker, and he can fight his ass off. You know, as is, you know, you could come up with a dozen different guys that are you just don't have that kind of build is it fair that someone naturally gets a crazy build is it fair that some dudes are you know built like vinnie magalhaes you know vinnie magalhaes is a fucking god he's a greek god you look at the way that guy's, and then other dudes just get some dorky, goofy body with wide hips and narrow shoulders and shit. If those guys have to compete together, how fair is that? Well, I think there's a way to equalize the playing field.

Van Henderson is a really true, I believe, hypo-gonad, and he has the pass by the UFC, or at least had one, to at least normalize his testosterone. There are some people out there who have truly deficiency in some of the hormones. That puts them at a selective disadvantage at the other end of the spectrum compared to those people who are abusing the steroids and then getting a selective advantage over the rest of the field. I think if by routine and judicious monitoring,

everybody were allowed to be put in the good end of the normal range, that would eliminate a lot of confusion and equalize this playing field that can be abused. Steve, what do you think about when you hear about guys like Dan Henderson or other guys who their body stops producing hormones at a young age? And then I've heard it said by trainers and people who, you know, have a lot of experience in it that they think it's related to wrestling. They think it's related to cutting a lot of weight and overtraining in wrestling practice for so many years.

And that something happens and your body starts shutting down certain systems because you're overtaxing them. And he said it's really common with wrestlers. Do you think that that's possible? I've never read any peer-reviewed literature in the sports medicine literature that shows that. And that's what the different sports medicine specialties are all about. So you think it's just rumors? I would say perhaps many of the wrestlers may have used steroids in the past, and that's the reason that now their production of testosterone normally has been shot to heck.

Well, we know that's the case for some fighters, right? And that's actually one stipulation that the Nevada State Athletic Commission has before issuing a pass for people to use testosterone. You have to have not have been popped for abusing steroids in the past. That makes entire sense. abusing steroids in the past. That makes entire sense. Yeah, because some folks, apparently they do so much that their balls shut down, right?

Exactly correct. In fact, some of the pro-drugs that are sold that supposedly are pro-drugs for testosterone wind up burning out the cells called interstitial cells of labig in your testicles. Those are the ones that are responsible for the production of testosterone. They basically have used so much of this pro-hormone, causing your interstitial cells to spit out so much testosterone, for lack of a better description, just plain burnout, so that when you're off anything, your natural production is a zilch. So they're basically just redlining their body and blowing their engine.

Right? Great analogy, yeah. They're blowing their dick engine. That's what's going on. How dare you blow your dick engine for some bigger biceps. So you're at the forefront of this shit. How do you think this is going to go? I mean, you know, when I hear, like, NFL players talk about doing new tests

where they're going to test for human growth hormone, I'm like, get the fuck out of here, man. Look at the size of those guys. You don't think those guys are on growth hormone? Those guys must be on it. Yeah, come on, man. You can't go backwards. So we're going to have NFL players feel like they were in the 60s?

You know, you're not going to have that. No, I don't want to happen. It's not going to happen. So what's going to happen here? I mean, is it just posturing when they talk about changing the laws? I mean, everybody knows how many different big baseball players were on steroids. Everybody knows about Mark McGuire and Sammy Sosa. I'm not optimistic about the changes because I think it's all related to political correctness.

You know, the same reason, for example, that testosterone, a natural substance produced in our body, without which we do very, very badly, both women and men need testosterone, but they've made testosterone into a controlled substance, like Vicodin and Norco-Lortab, norco or lortab and an hgh human growth hormone is the only medicine in all the medicines that are available for us to use in the united states that is has a specific label on it by the fda that it cannot be used for off-label purposes uh meaning anything other than a child who is failing to grow because of low growth hormone. And all the medicines you can use for off-label purposes, you can use it for other indications other than which it was brought to market for.

And this is... Growth hormone, no. Is this in every state? Is this in every state or no? Well, that's across the country, yes. But at date, that growth hormone can't be used for off-label purposes. Wow. Some states are really beginning to enforce that now, I believe because the FDA is about to hammer down.

I think California is the first state in which it's really, really become difficult to find anyone who prescribes HGH for anti-aging purposes. I find that fascinating in the age where cigarettes are legal. I just think that's one of the funniest things. It's just so stupid that they would be spending any time going after stuff that makes you a better athlete. They're going to eliminate that and not eliminate cigarettes. As Brian lights up, his mind is so weak you can't even say cigarette. He just starts smoking. I'm talking about natural stuff. I mean, testosterone and growth hormone aren't natural.

Your body produces them. Yeah. If you were low on your thyroid and you felt like crap because you go to your doctor and says, oh, gee, look, you diagnosed you as being hypothyroid, let's give you a little thyroid and you start to feel great and you feel like you should be feeling.

But for whatever reason, the mindset for things like testosterone and growth hormone aren't there. It has to do with baseball and people feeling fucked over. They passed a bunch of silly laws because a bunch of people felt like Mark McGuire cheated. He cheated at the awesome game. He ruined what it is to be an American. You know, they're still hounding after Barry Bonds.

Leave Barry Bonds the fuck alone. What do you care? You know, and there was, oh, they're going to get him for perjury. He shouldn't lie in court. They shouldn't ask him what he put in his body. It's none of your fucking business. How about that? That's exactly right.

How about that? Welcome to America, you fuckhead. You know what I put in my body. Yeah, you know, and especially in baseball, man. Who gives a shit? Yeah, you shouldn't encourage kids to take things that are dangerous. You know, that's absolutely true. And the problem is if a kid wants to be a natural baseball player

and they have to deal with all these guys that are on the sauce, you know, then, you know, it is kind of unfair for the kid who wants to be natural. What is the solution for that, Steve? Well, as I said, it's not a simple one, but I think allowing everybody to at least optimize all their hormones. So you know that

everyone's allowed to take the hormones up to the high end of the normal range for their age, anyway. And that way you eliminate the possibility of abuse, at least, you know least eliminate it, but you decrease it. You bring those other folks who might be lagging in their production up to a similar

level. The variable of your own natural hormone production is eliminated. You eliminate that variable. Everyone's about the same level. And then it's training, athletic abilities and practice. So you think because this stuff exists, because there are these absolute real effective performance enhancers, there's almost no way to get rid of them, take them out of the system. When people have used them and use them successfully, and they figured out a way to mask them. There's almost no way to keep people from taking them. Is that the case? Well, they're also, I mean, they're manufactured by pharmaceutical companies for people who

have wasting diseases, AIDS, anemias, terrible burns and injuries and things like that. So there are many valid medical uses, and that's why they're made by the pharmaceutical companies. But then once we find out that it makes you a better baseball player, we go, no, no, no, no, no. Precisely. It's so interesting, man. What do you think it is? Is it men afraid of dudes becoming the Ubermunch

and go out there and fucking all the women? Is that what it is? You don't want some guy taking steroids and growth hormone and becoming some giant gorilla fucker? I think it's just ignorance. I mean, complete ignorance by people and it's like a bad word and ignorance

and fear of what they don't know or they don't understand. If they knew about it and understood it and presented a reasonable case to the most reasonable people. If even small doses of steroids create long-term problems, Brian, what the fuck are you doing? what can happen when extreme doses are involved?

Brian, shut that shit up. If even small doses of... If even small doses of... was about to find out. Jesus, Brian. Sorry. Why are you fucking with things, man? You guys on the phone.

Anyway, Steve, thank you very much for your insight into this matter. Is there anything else you'd like to say about this stuff? Oh, shoot. Like I said, I think that the bad light has been cast on things that shouldn't necessarily have a bad light cast on it. It's too bad about

his recent suspension because this increases the bad light on something that is actually pretty good. you know, hormones in the right amounts. In the right amounts, but do you agree with this cyborg thing? How do you feel about women taking male hormones if she did, in fact, do that? Well, if she, in fact, did it to the extent that it appears she did, I don't agree with that because I believe with those dosages, she's hurting her heart and her liver and a number of other systems in her body.

If it hurts, I always wondered that, if it hurts a woman to do that, to take male hormones, then how does chastity bono become chas bono? Don't they just pump her up with testosterone? Isn't that exactly what the process is? That's correct. Yeah. Testosterone and a genitoplasty. Whoa, stop right there.

A surgically created penis. Shut the fuck up. Can we get some shots of those? Does it feel the same? Wait a minute, wait a minute. Wait a minute, wait a minute. I didn't know they did that. I thought she just took a lot of steroids and she grew a larger clit and she used that.

I don't know, actually. Oh, for her case. But there is an option where they turn the vagina into a penis. I've never heard of that. Oh, hell yeah. Really? Hell yeah. I've heard the penis into a vagina.

I've heard that one, but I didn't know the vagina to the penis. How does that process work? That's got to be so hard. It doesn't really function to get an erection. They have hydraulics that you can use to make it have an erection. So you have to press hydraulics. You have orgasm the same way. I bet you don't.

What could that look like? Is there any way we can see what that looks like? You know how the girls have pussy boners sometimes? Let's see it. Maybe they just pump that shit up and get it. Can we get pictures? I don't want to see those pictures, man. Just have pussy boners. Maybe they just pump that shit up, you know and get it Can we get pictures? Just Google pussy boner butthole. Oh, yeah, are you we can't see Really yeah, whoa, so you deflate your balls into your your new new dick

You deflate your balls into your new dick? Yeah. What is a good, healthy dick with a saggy, empty set of balls underneath it? I'd feel like a goddamn fraud. If you were having sex and you were slapping an empty beach ball in her ass, slap, slap, slap. A deflated beach ball. Yeah, you don't want your balls to be like that. You want your balls to be meaty and full.

Can I ask him about my elbow? Yeah, Brian is a problem. One for the other. Brian has a problem he wants to ask you about. I'm pretty sure it's probably cancer because he smokes so much. He's got cancer of his elbow, I think. Lately, my elbow has been really sore. Not like hurting, but if I touch it, I can feel it's been really sore like not not like hurting but like if I touch it I could feel

it's kind of sore and then I've been working out lately and I've noticed like my I could barely it's like 50% off what I usually can like lift uh and it it just hurts like if I touch a certain part of it it's just like wow that that kind of hurts you think you know is that a staph infection? It's in the inside, like towards my heart. That's golfer's elbow. That's medial epicondylitis. Sounds very much like that. It's one of the

repetitive motion diseases. And it's an inflammation. It's tendonitis. It's the epicondyle, the area around the inside of the elbow there. It's inflammation from repetitive motion. Is that the arm you beat off with? It's the arm that I podcast with.

It's my podcasting arm. You hurt your arm podcasting. That's a sure sign you need to work out. This jelly-bodied motherfucker, you hurt your arm moving a mouse. So is that something I should just try not to use for a while and take like Advil or something? Exactly. What you want to do is if whatever it is that you're doing that's making it happen, you want to throttle back on it, then you want to take the therapeutic doses

of a non-steroidal. If you're taking ibuprofen, you want to take 800 milligrams a day, three times, or rather 800 milligrams, three times a day for about 10 days. And if you don't tweak it by doing something like hard exercise, then using heat as often as is practical. If you tweak it by doing something, you want to ice it for a day or two after that, and then

go to exclusively heat. And what brand of tampons should I buy? I thought it was wrong. Lately he just uses socks. He's trying to avoid it and pretend it's not really happening. It's like 800 mil. That's good. Thank you very much for that because I've been

working out on it unfortunately and I think I really messed it up because now it just really hurts. If that doesn't work, you get some Kenalog injections in it. It usually breaks the cycle. Not special K. Don't get special work, you get some Kenalog injections in it. Okay. That usually breaks the cycle. Yeah, not special K. Don't get special K, you fuck. Not special K.

Steve, you're the fucking man. Thanks for all your insight. We really appreciate you letting us know what the inside scoop is on all this stuff and breaking it down scientifically for us, sir. Thank you, Steve. Thanks, guys. Good to talk with you. Thank you, my brother.

Take care. Bye. And that And Steve That's the first time We've ever had anybody Call in on the podcast Yep

Perfect time That was great Not really That's the second time Oh yeah Hanato But that was Not through the lines

Where we hear it in the headsets It was different Oh you're right Yeah Man It is kind of crazy That a girl can do that To her body

It is amazing. Did you see that while the doctor was on the phone, the video of the guy with the arm that he was injecting and just started bleeding? Yeah, well, you know what that guy's doing? He's shooting an oil into his arms that makes his arms swell up like that. Oh, like a silicone? Yeah, something along those lines. Like there's a lot of guys that get addicted to it, and they have these crazy arms that don't even look like real muscles. They look insane.

Are they called something? Are they like, yo, check out my bump? No, they pretend that it's muscle. Dudes do it to their chests. There's a crazy Brazilian guy in a video, and he's dancing. He had that done to his chest and his biceps, and he's dancing to this Brazilian music. It's pretty funny. And he's got tits,its and unarmed tits he's got arm tits too because it's like

liquid it's really weird it's a it's a thing a weird thing that they do it's i think it's called synthol i think that's what it's called and they just inject this oil into their body and it makes their muscles bigger it doesn't make you any stronger it just gives you these giant biceps and giant triceps just makes you look really bizarre i got a pretty cool steroid story yeah one of my fighters like maybe five years ago i got him a meeting with the head of pride the head of pride i don't know i know i know this story we sat down uh and at the time my fighter was probably 175 that's what he was walking so we were thinking you know introduce him to the man uh and try to get in at 55 in in pride i think it was 60 right 60 60 that's right so that's what we were thinking usually

cut weight and fight and he's he was 5 11 and uh the guy the pride guy said uh we'd like you have good look we'd like you uh but what you weigh and he said 175 and he goes but i can cut to 160 easy no we want you 185 190 and like we were like we were stumped like what the hell how do we what do you say to that we want he wants us to gain weight and uh you know homeboy was like no i i will i can't i'm not gonna go how am i gonna do that because we want you 185 and i told him i go yeah yeah yeah we'll do it we'll do it like we'll just get you in man we'll figure it out later. But in Japan, they encourage steroids, which is crazy. Well, it's just that one organization, right? I don't know if they have any tests for steroids in Japan.

Do they? For Shudo, do they test for steroids? I don't think they test at all. Well, they tested, but they didn't do anything, apparently. Is it illegal? So they do test and they go along with the charade? I don't know. You know, you'd have to ask them.

Like if you talk to Vanderlei, he says that he got tested every time he did Pride. But what I understand is, yeah, they tested people. This is coming from people who managed fighters who fought over there, but they don't do anything with it. And even if they wanted to, like, say you tested hot, they could, you know, pull out a test and say,

oh, you tested hot and then use it against you. But for the most part, they didn't do anything about it isn't it insane that everybody involved in generally everybody you you gotta know i mean that you gotta say you gotta guess that everybody involved in major sports like especially football like all the coaches and everybody in the you know high up they all know there's their athletes are doing steroids and they test but if they wanted to they could bust everybody they'll just random test anytime they just wanted to come down and put their foot down it's like they're it's like they're it's like uh the drug war in columbia they're stopping a couple you know every now and then

they'll bust a cartel every now and then. They know everybody's aware that most of the drugs are getting through. 90% of the drugs are getting through. And most of them are probably coming from, you know, through our own government. But we pretend that, you know, that they're making a difference. You know, they pretend that every now and then they'll put out a fire in the jungles of Colombia or Peru. They'll find a camp that is abandoned. They already got all their shit done, but they burn it so they can't use it again. It's incredible.

But back to the steroid thing. It's like the whole steroid thing. Don't admit it. Always deny it. Pretend like the regulations and all the steroid tests are actually keeping people from doing steroids. I don't think they are. I think most professional athletes, in my opinion, I think you have to do it if you

want to compete at the upper levels. I don't think you have to. Some guys don't have to. Like John Jones, I don't believe he's on anything. I believe him. He says he's not on anything. I believe it. Yeah. I think, I mean, he um i i think you know i mean take supplements probably takes glutamine i know he takes glutamine i know he takes you know you know multivitamins and shit like that but

there's some guys that need more help you know and did that does that mean they shouldn't be able to compete at the highest levels and that's where the real question is it should it all be 100 natural i think i think the sport itself if it was legal i think the sport itself, if it was legal, I think the sport itself would regulate it. Because we know if, let's say, Cyborg wanted to be 190 pounds, she could do that easily. But the sport will regulate your weight. You're not going to get too crazy with it anyways. You're not going to get like a bodybuilder who's 220 pounds. Well, I don't know you can say that because look at Alistair Overeem.

Alistair Overeem. Alistair Overeem he was at one point in time 205 that's what he fought at. 203 actually pride weight and walked around who knows what he weighed. He weighed more. He's a skinny guy but he had to cut weight for sure. Killed his endurance. Now Alistair is 260

fucking 3 pounds. But he could be 310 if he wanted to. He's tall enough. He has the frame. If he wanted to be, he could be a massive 320 pound guy. You look at him, man. He is a superhero. I don't think anybody has a problem with that. His weight works for his build.

He's doing great. So the sport, his division, his frame, that'll regulate. He's not going to go out of control. Dudes that are using an MMA, they're not going to try. They're trying to cut weight. Bob Sapp is the argument to that, obviously. One dude, couple dudes, whatever.

There's always going to be guys like that. So you think guys like that should just be legal? I think steroids should be legal. That's what I think. Do you think they should be regulated, though? Should there be anybody that watches them and makes sure you're not going Bob Sapp style? Or do you think a guy should be allowed to just whack it out and just take it deep? There's not—no one's regulating how many cigarettes you can smoke.

You can smoke as many cigarettes as you want. What is worse? Do you think steroids are worse than cigarettes? Fuck no. Misuse? Yes. You think so? Yeah, you misuse cigarettes.

Wow. You just have a little bit of goober in the morning. You misuse steroids. You could probably do some permanent little bit of goober in the morning. You misuse steroids. You could probably do some permanent damage. Are you basing this on any research whatsoever? No, I mean, like, if you get a kid that's 14 years old, he can misuse steroids pretty quick. Okay, that's a good point. If you misuse cigarettes at 14, you're just going to become addicted to cigarettes.

Well, you said when you said children is a good point. The developmental process really can get fucked up if you are a child and you start introducing introducing hormones and a lot of high school kids apparently take roids a lot of people in high school do that's crazy how about that uh kid back in the house you know he's probably 20 now but back when he was like 10 hercules he was on the house hercules can we see that yeah his parents were giving him roids for sure right yeah 100 they went to jail for it yeah they they caught him giving him something poor kid kid. That's sad shit. Little Hercules. Right. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. He was fucking swole and he was a little tiny kid, man.

Scary shit. It's crazy how everyone's got to pretend like it's, you know, no one's doing it. Only a select few are doing it. Well, I don't think, Holy shit. Look at that. Yeah. We're looking at the video of the kid. He's built like a brick shithouse and he's a tiny little kid. It's really kind of nuts. He's got like a full eight pack.

Wow. And I guess his dad was the one who was training him and getting him to do shit. He doesn't look that big. You know, he's got all the sauce. He's completely off. He got off of it. But I think he had like real problems. I don't know what he's up to I'm sure Yeah, I mean I think his body was all fucked up. You know you're a little kid, and you're getting fed roids I Heard of a dude. I think was one of Joey Diaz's friends who gave his dog steroids

Had a rot wire with giant muscles you could know. No, it wasn't Joey Diaz. It was somebody else. God damn it. I don't remember who it was. Joey Diaz. It wasn't Joey Diaz. No, it wasn't Joey Diaz. It was one of Joey Diaz's friends,

but it wasn't him. It was somebody else's friend. But they gave their Rottweiler steroids. And it was a giant fucking Rottweiler. You could do that, man. You know what's crazy is, Cyborg gets busted for steroids and now dana's saying that he might like scrap the division because there's not enough chicks

at that weight you would think with all the fat chicks in this country you would think there'd be a whole shitload of fat chicks white trash bitches yeah you know what i mean you think there'd be a whole shitload well i think that you know a lot of women with cyborg at the helm at the the top of the weight class they didn't want a fighter i don't think there'd be a whole shitload? Well, I think that a lot of women with Cyborg at the helm, at the top of the weight class, they didn't want to fight her. I don't think there's a lot of women that they just look at what they can do with their body and they look at what Cyborg can do with her body. Just period.

Who cares what she's doing? I don't know what she's doing. They didn't want to fight that girl. That girl's too tough. She's too scary. There's a girl named- She scared the fuck out of everybody. There's a girl named Gabby Garcia.

She's huge. She's killing it. Oh, a girl named Gabby Garcia. She's huge. Oh, she's the Brazilian chick, right? She's the Brazilian chick. She's a heavyweight. Can you put up Gabby Garcia jiu-jitsu? Isn't she like over 200 pounds? She's massive. She smashes everybody.

How much does she weigh? You know, it's crazy that for a chick, maybe she weighs 200 pounds weighs 200 pounds wow you know god damn i'm not sure what she weighs but for a chick 190 pounds is mammoth and now is she on the sauce i think she's just kind of fat she's just a big girl yeah just a big giant girl that squashes chicks i think yeah she destroys well one of the things that dana oh, my God. She's lost a lot of weight, though. She used to be, she's like in super shape now. Look at her hands. She's got giant fucking hands, dude. Wow.

Is there another shot of her? Wow, dude. She's got MG and action patch in there. Dude, that's crazy. Is there a shot of her naked? Or in shorts or something? I don't think that's her, buddy. It's the juiu-jitsu one

Click on that one Wow that sucks Wow it's a big girl So she just dominates the heavyweight division Yeah you would just think there'd be so So many chicks at that weight But they're gonna trash the division Well I think like I said

They were afraid of Cyborg When you see a woman that just puts everyone into a fucking coma. Did you see her last fight? Like 16 second knockout. She just comes running at these chicks and Vanderlei silvers them. You know, she's like, you know, Vanderlei was the essential quintessential shoot to box fighter in the early 2000s. And that's what she is for women fighters. She just fucking comes at you, man.

Guns blazing. I love watching that chick fight. But, you know, who knows? You know, when you saw Vanderlei, like, in his prime, you know, like the Vanderlei-Sakuraba fights, Vanderlei-Quinton-Jackson fights in his prime. God, man. Who was more fun to watch than Vanderlei?

He was the best, dude. He would just fuck you get guaranteed someone was getting fucked up in a vanderley silver fight you never saw a vanderley silver fight where vanderley was just holding on to people or laying on top of them and trying to eke out the w that motherfucker would just throw himself into the fire you know he would just come blazing it guys wild crazy fucking haymaker punches and most people just couldn't deal with the pressure it was just too nuts and i think that's exactly what's going on with the cyborg chick but now that she's if she was doing something and they

caught her and now they can keep her from doing something she'll be like a woman again she'll be like a strong woman instead of what she's like right now, which is like a strong man, you know? I just want to say something real quick. Gabby, I didn't, you know, I forgot that you lost weight and you're in great shape now. You look great. Keep it up. I think you used to be overweight. My memory

may be a little foggy, but you look great now. Keep it up. I'm a big fan. I just wanted to clear that up. Yeah, you got to be careful sometimes to say things. Yeah, she looks great. No, she looks great. I didn't realize.

You know, I forgot. That's right. She lost weight. She got into shape. She's like big country because big country used to be fat. He's lost a lot of weight. And, you know, he said that he didn't change his diet at all. It's all just lifting weights.

That makes sense. That's what he said. That makes sense. Like, keep lifting weights. You look great. Well, he should be lifting weights. That makes sense. That's what he said. That makes sense. Like, keep lifting weights. You look great. Well, he should be lifting weights anyway. I mean, really, he could lose so much weight and compete in lower weight classes if he wants to. If he wants to fight at heavyweight, you know, for him, it's a struggle.

He's got to put on as much muscle as he can. He could get down at 205. Yeah. And just like Fedor, I think Fedor should be shredded and ripped at 205. And he would, you know, it's crazy how you could lose two, three fights in a row. Like, and then you win a couple and then you're back in the mix because he's back in the mix. Fedor? Yeah.

Really? I think he's hell yeah. I don't think so. Monson and Ishii. It's like, who cares about those two wins? Yes. Yes. But you got to look at his losses.

He lost a big foot. So fucking what? That guy was huge. So what? That doesn't say that he's washed up. And then he loses to Dan Henderson. He was beating Dan Henderson. So fucking what? That guy was huge. So what? That doesn't say that he's washed up. And then he loses to Dan Henderson. He was beating Dan Henderson.

He fucked up. And anybody that gets connected with anybody. I wouldn't say he was beating Dan Henderson because he really didn't do anything to him. I would say it was a fight. Yes. It was a good fight. I wouldn't say he was beating him because I don't think he did anything to him. He wasn't beating him, but he had him hurt. Call it whatever you want.

Well, he knocked him down, but I think it was more of a slip than anything when I watched it. And Henderson made the most of the situation. I mean, when he was on the bottom, he got out of it so quick. When he got under him and then hit him with that uppercut, man, that was beautiful. Yeah, definitely. But you getting knocked out by Henderson doesn't mean that you're washed up. It's true. You know what I mean?

It's true. Henderson can knock out anybody. You lose into a black belt that's gigantic and there's a big weight advantage. That's not saying that you're washed up. You know, in this sport, man, you could lose two, three fights in a row. Bam. And people are calling, you know, calling for your head. I think Fedor is still very much in the mix.

I think that he should get serious with his weight and shred down and get to 205 and yeah fuck that division up i think fedor is still in the mix and when you look at when you look at this this brings us to the fight you don't think john jones would just totally own him i don't know i don't know and you know what if john jones beat him that still doesn't mean fedor's washed up you know i would love to see like fedor versus machida that would be badass yeah remember fedor fugida yeah that was the shit. The fight's really, really quick. It's like a minute long. They just came out fucking...

Is it only a minute long? Yeah, it's like a minute and a half long. It's real short. Look up Fedor versus Fujita. Fujita. Yeah. Fedor back in the Pride days, he was destroying people, but the level of competition was nowhere near what it's like today.

It's amazing how quick it's changed. You know, with Alistair, with Alistair, Cain Velasquez, Junior Dos Santos, just those three. Like, holy shit. Yeah. Those three can fuck with anybody throughout the history of the heavyweight division. All of a sudden, the heavyweight division is stacked, stacked, stacked. Damn. And Shane Carwin, once he gets healthy, Shane Carwin healthy just right away they blast fedor versus fujita this was uh fujita was big back

then i think this was like 2000 looks so different or something 2003 2005 maybe fujita fought in uh a pro wrestling match in new years for japan and he don't look nothing like this anymore. He's lost all his muscle mass. He's just a guy with normal-sized shoulders and a barrel chest. He was the great Jap hope at this point. Fedor would just smash guys. And that was the kicks on the ground as well.

There's something about kicks on the ground that made shit a little crazier. And then right here, check out this takedown defense. Fujita has got him in a single. He went for a double. And this takedown defense is awesome. Look at this. Yeah. His takedown defense. Fujita has got him in a single. He went for a double. And this takedown defense is awesome. Look at this. Yeah, his takedown defense is nasty. And he's throwing punches at him while he's trying to take him down.

He got rocked right there. Fujita landed a left hook. And this is really the first time I think we've seen Fedor get rocked just right there where he wobbled. Yeah, look at that. Whoa. He is on wobbly feet The crowd's going nuts The Japanese never go crazy Look at the background

If it was a better striker He would have been done there Yeah If somebody knew how to push away Because Fedor took it to the ground The mistake here was Fujita wanted to take him to the ground He should have stayed up with him

Yeah for sure And Fedor let him take him to the ground He's going to recover in the guard Now he's standing up Again with the takedown defense. Look at this. Yeah, that Sambo background is great. Look how he pops up.

He's on his ass, but look how he pops up again. And he's still wobbly. He's still wobbly. But look how he comes back. This is classic. Look at this body kick by Fedor. Watch. Boom, boom, boom.

Body kick. Boom. And then left hook and then right hand. He would throw fucking bombs at dudes. He was a killer. Oh, he got the rear naked with no hooks. No hooks. Look at that. Fell back and now he gets the hooks. Nice. That's the same rear naked the way

he did Tim Sylvia where he grips it right underneath your esophagus. Gable grips it. Boom. And goes right into your throat with that. Yep. Yeah. He's in the back in those days when, you know, Dana keeps saying Fedor sucks. He said it in some interview recently. What do you think of Fedor? He's like, Fedor sucks. He said it in some interview recently. What do you think of Fedor?

He was like, Fedor sucks. Yeah. I can't believe he says that. It's incredible. Well, you know, it's part of it. He had to deal with the management and all the nonsense. They were trying to have a co-promotion with the UFC. And the UFC is like, are you crazy?

You're going to take half the promotion because you have one guy and you think this guy's the greatest ever? And Dana said it to him. He says, look, this guy loses one fight. One guy punches him. One guy catches him. And you know what can happen. It can happen to anybody in this crazy sport.

And he's not worth anything. Get him in the fucking UFC right away. Let's do this. Stop your fucking co-promotion. Stop your crazy talk. But they couldn't put it together. And then whoever was managing Fedor, boy, did they fuck they fuck up boy did they miss out on a lot of money and dude we could have saw fedor versus brock do you know how nutty that could have been that could have been very very interesting

you know brock is if you had the brock before his diverticulitis surgery you know i don't i don't know uh what that took out of him but uh it's also the factor that it was Overeem that was hitting him in the body. He's the most vicious knee striker in the fucking sport. When Overeem gets a hold of you in the clinch and those knees come, that's a different kind of knee, man. That is a different experience.

That knee's coming way faster than you thought it would. It's hitting you way harder than you thought it would. When I watch Overeem knee people to the body, it's just, it's so intense, man. The power in that guy's knees, it's so next level. You know, he would have done that, he could have done that to Brock at any stage in Brock's life, I believe,

if Brock couldn't have got the takedown. You know, what's interesting about that fight was that was the first fight that Brock Overeem fought a couple weeks ago. That was the first fight that brock overring fight a couple weeks ago that was the first ufc that i've seen as a spectator in vegas is since 2003 or two oh wow that was the first one i was so wasted i got so drunk everyone's buying me shots dudes from toronto are buying me shots yeah i'm like drinking blue moon beers all night i blacked out at the end of the night, passed out in the hotel. I woke up.

I knew Overeem won, but I didn't know exactly how he won. But I knew he won. I had no recollection of Nick Diaz, Donald Cerrone at all. Really? I didn't know how that went at all, man. I saw a photo,

and I thought you were tripping on acid because you look so fucked up. Yeah, man. I was having so much fun. The greatest show ever invented. The Indian came out, dog. Yeah, the Indian came out in full force, man. I scalped a couple motherf. Yeah, man. I was having so much fun. The greatest show ever invented. The Indian came out, dog. Yeah, the Indian came out in full force, man. I scalped a couple motherfuckers, too.

Hey, hey, hey, hey. For those that don't know, that's what Joey Diaz always said about Eddie Bravo. Give him a couple of drinks and that Indian comes out. Because apparently, according to Joey Diaz, Indians and Mexicans are related. It's all the same bloodline, dog And, you know If I drink too much There's a lot of people that have

Indians inside of them that come out If the Indian comes out If the Indian comes out Odds are I'm gonna forget 95% of the night I've been in some situations with Eddie Where I had to hold his fucking hand And walk him home

What about Germany? Germany Well, there's a couple different ones How about England Eddie where I had to hold his fucking hand and walk him home. What about Germany? Germany was a couple of different ones. How about England? When I had to wake you up, we were banging on the fucking door, banging on his door, man. I had security come out because I thought he might be dead. We're in England for the UFC. Yeah, we were in for the UFC. It's time to take the flight.

And I always say, hey, man, we got a flight in like an hour. You're cool? You're going to pack? Yeah, man, I'm fucking fine. Because we try to stay up all night. We try to stay up all night so we can sleep on the plane. So it's in the morning, and we got to go. The car is waiting for us.

I'm like, shit, we got to get to that airport early. It's an international flight. We got passports and shit. Bang, bang, bang. Knock on the door. No Eddie. Bang, bang, bang. Knock on the door.

No Eddie. Call a cell phone. No Eddie. Go downstairs. Have the desk call his cell phone No Eddie Go downstairs Have the phone The desk Call his room No answer So I said listen

I'm worried about my friend's safety He was He was intoxicated last night You know I want to make sure that he's okay Can you open the door They open the door This motherfucker is sleeping

With the lights on The lights were on And he's on the bed Completely unconscious With his fucking Cowboy boots on just asleep in there and i go eddie eddie and then you you open up your eyes you go what's up dude it's just like that simple that simple it's me and two security dudes and we're screaming ed Eddie! Eddie! And you just pop your head up. What's up, dude?

You were blasted. Like nothing. Nothing, man. You were blasted. I had to help you stuff your shit. I remember you had a shoe in your backpack. And you're like, why do I have a shoe in my backpack? That's the Indian right there. He's gone right there.

Oh, my God. Your brain is swimming in a world of soup. I was fucking hammered. Alcohol soup. I was hammered, dude. Oh, my God. Look at is swimming in a world of soup. I was fucking hammered. Alcohol soup. I was hammered, dude. Oh, my God. Look at you. Look at that face.

That's the end of drunk. What about Texas? The best story is Germany, man. It was so fucked up that you had to write a blog about it. Germany was so crazy. Yeah, Texas, too. Well, here's Germany. In Germany, it was like, I don't know, maybe like we had to leave at like 7 o'clock in the morning.

And at 5 o'clock in the morning, I talked to Eddie on the phone. I go, dude, what are you doing, man? I go, we got to leave in like two hours. I'm going to power through. I'm going to power through. I go, you're going to power through? I go, are you still awake? Yeah, dude, don't worry about it.

I was out partying. He was still out partying. So I go downstairs. I eat breakfast. And I say, all right, let't worry about it. I was out partying. Yeah, he was still out partying. So I go downstairs. I eat breakfast. And I say, all right, let me go get Eddie. I can't get him. He's not in his room. He's not answering his phone.

Same thing. I have them open up his door. He's not in his room. He's gone. So I'm like, shit, where the fuck could he be? So then I go downstairs, and I look around, and I keep calling his phone. He's not answering. And finally, I say to the guy that's

taking care of the cars, I said, you got a car for Joe Rogan? And the guy says, oh yeah, he left. And I go, what? And he goes, he left. I go, no, no, no, I'm Joe Rogan. You guys have a car for me. He goes, oh my god, somebody already said they were Joe Rogan and they left.

I go, who the fuck? What do you look like? He goes, I had long hair and tattoos. I i'm like motherfucker eddie told them that he was me he's in this car blacked out drunk blacked out it's already an hour on the road let me let me let me take it from here now what happened was i had partied all night man me and jason uk jason mcnabb we he was just getting me hammered all night. And I don't remember. The last thing I remember was taking shots at some club. It was the last thing.

And then fast forward to me waking up in the back of this car with my backpack and my suitcase in the back of this car. And Joe Rogan is calling me. So I wake up. It's bright. I'm like, in the back of this car, and Joe Rogan is calling me. So I wake up. It's bright. I'm like, how the fuck did I get back here? Joe's calling me. And I answer. And I'm like, Joe?

He goes, you fucking took my car. I hung up the phone. I asked the driver. I'm like, where are we going? He's like, dude, we're on the Autobahn, dude. He's flying down the Autobahn. He looks back. He's like, we're going to the airport. I'm like, oh, shit're on the Autobahn, dude. He's flying down the Autobahn. He looks back. He's like, we're going to the airport.

I'm like, oh, shit. How the fuck did this happen? So I'm trying to remember what the fuck happened. And I open up my backpack. And I always put my shoes, my extra shoes in my suitcase. Always. I pack a certain way all the time. There's one shoe in my backpack.

And I always keep my computer in my backpack. I'm like, where's my computer? My computer is in my backpack and I and I always keep my computer in my backpack like where's my computer my computer is in my suitcase so in a drunken stupor I just must have just grabbed everything put shit in like a zombie pack shit up like a fucking idiot and I woke I wake up in the back of the car and then I find Joe kept calling and I didn't know what to say I didn't know what the fuck was going on I needed time to think so I finally answered I go dude i'm sorry i don't know how this happened i have no idea how i ended up in the back of this car we get you know and he ended up getting a cab and at the airport joe was so mad at me he wouldn't talk to me he was so pissed it was just so ridiculous it was this is like it

was the second time in a row we went traveling internationally. The second time I had to babysit him. It was from England to this. It was just like, Jesus, man. He had to write a blog about it. Yeah. Well, you're the first guy that I ever met where I used to say, people say, oh, man, I black out when I get drunk. Shut up, bitch. You ain't blacking out.

You're just pretending you're blacking out because it makes it convenient. I didn't understand blacking out because I don't black out. I drink and I get drunk, but I remember. Sometimes it's a shitty slideshow if i'm really hammered but i still remember most of the stuff that happened well me and brian have gotten faded a lot on the road when we used to you know we used to go on the road to film your comedy show and do the joe show the whole school time and brian would get up he would do something stupid i would get up i would do something stupid there's always the bottle service Yeah there's We were One of us were getting too fucked up Right

And then finally Joe got fucked up And this is at the House of Blues Like maybe four years ago And at this point I've seen Joe show at least His stand up comedy At least 15,000 times

We've talked about this a bunch of times Oh didn't we In the podcast Have we Yeah this The Texas one's my favorite What happened in Texas I don't even know the full story about I don't know if you even want to talk about that We've talked about this a bunch of times in the podcast. Have we? Yeah. The Texas one's my favorite. What happened in Texas?

I don't even know the full story about, I don't know if you even want to talk about that. Eddie's blackout Texas story. Which one are you talking about? Hold on. Try to remember. Does it involve girls? I don't. It was when you partied with our friend.

Okay. Shut the fuck up. I don't even know what you're talking about. It was like two years ago. It was like two or three years ago. We partied with a friend and you woke up and you. Oh, that the fuck up. I don't even know what you're talking about. It was like two years ago. It was like two or three years ago. We parted with a friend, and you woke up, and you... Oh, that one. Oh, that's right. That one.

Yes. Yeah. That was pretty crazy. I'm going to stay on that one. Okay. That was crazy. That was... That's my favorite one.

Austin, right? Yeah, yeah. Oh, yeah. Yeah, that was pretty fucking crazy. Yeah, you scared some people. You scared some people there. Yeah. I always think about that one.

Every time somebody says Eddie's. Well, you know, I've seen the Indian come out, man. Like I said, I never used to think that it was real. I used to think that people would say that they black out drunk and like, come on, man. But I've looked into Eddie's eyes and I see gerbils. I see gerbil eyes. Like, you ever look at a gerbil's eyes? They're just black and dark and you don't know what's going on there.

Mostly nothing. You know what it's all about? Those shark eyes. I am not an alcoholic. I don't, like, drink every day or anything. But some, you know, in social situations, I'll have some drinks, and 95% of the time I keep it under control. But every now and then, like, again, I was just so happy to be at the UFC

in the audience watching in Vegas. I hadn't done that in, like, 10 years. It was amazing. It was an amazing experience. Yeah, that's how they tricked me into working for the UFC in the audience watching in Vegas and done that in like 10 years. It was amazing. It was an amazing experience. Yeah, that's how they tricked me into working for the UFC. We had so much fun watching the first few. That's the best. Oh, man.

Yeah. We had a good time. I love the UFC so much. I love it so much. That's why I quit. Because when I was working for the UFC, I was in a production booth watching, you know, and on monitors and stuff. And I wanted to get drunk. It was great when you were sitting it on monitors and stuff, and I wanted to get drunk and fucking scream.

It was great when you were sitting next to me, man, when you were doing the fight analysis. That was cool. We had some cool conversations. Those were fun ones where you scored fights. Yeah, that was fun. You were great at that shit, too. I think that that was a great feature, too, because you had a really intelligent argument for why this guy should have won or that guy should have won.

And it was, you know, sometimes when you're commentating, you know, you're calling stuff, but you're not really calculating and scoring at the same time necessarily. But when you're just scoring and then you're writing all the stuff down, you had a little extra insight. You know, I thought that was a good thing. That was fun. Those are the fun ones, man,. You got to sit next to me.

Once they stuck your ass in the booth. Once you called Randy Chuck or Chuck Randy. Congratulations, Chuck. I said that to Randy. Yeah, whoopsies. And I didn't even realize it. That's one of those things. I walked out of the octagon and go, dude, you said congratulations, Chuck.

I go, no. Someone told me that. Then I went up to Joe. I'm like, dude, did I say congratulations to Chuck? He goes, yeah, bro. I was like, my heart just sank into my ball sack. Oh, yeah. That's a tough gig, man.

That interviewing fighters after the fight. I've done it so long that it comes pretty easily and have a bunch of sort of go-to things. But my whole purpose is to just try to get them to express what the you know key moments of the fight was there anything that happened that freaked you out was there anything that was unusual what was the game plan just get them to kind of like give their thought and let give let them give shout outs their sponsors and thanks to their coaches and shit like that but you know it's fucking it's it's tough man you're you're on

live tv a lot of people aren't used to doing that. And you're thinking about it. We went through a gang of different people, remember? Yeah, that's the tough spot, post-fight interview. Because you can't, you could have some go-to generic shit if you can't think of anything. And everyone does. But everyone knows now what's the go-to stuff. But you have to wait until the fight is over to come up with something.

And now you have two minutes. The fight was just over. Now you have two minutes to come up with a question that the whole world is going to agree generally on asking. That's a good question. Man, that's hard. And sometimes there's nothing to say. Like the Korean zombie knocks out Mark Hominick in eight seconds.

What can you say? The only thing you can say is, did you ever think this was going to happen? What was the plan? Man, congratulations, thing you say is did you ever think this was going to happen you know like what was the plan you know man congratulations awesome performance but did you see that happening you know that's like one of those things that that fight was like one of those fights where like you're like what like mma can be so crazy sometimes that's like you see mark hominick he goes five rounds with jose aldo who's like the most scary striker in the division i mean leg kicks the fuck out of Uriah Faber's leg

till the whole thing looks like a purple salami. You know, his whole leg was like, it was like salami. It was like stuffed. It was like packed and a little swollen and shit. And then Korean Zombie takes him out in eight seconds. It's like, wow, what a nutty sport. It's so hard to predict. Anything can happen in that fucking sport, man.

It's just a wild- that fucking sport man it's just it's a just a wild ass fucking sport you know it's so uh so unpredictable you know like you know how many people predicted brock over overeem even dana dana i did i predicted i thought you know i thought we'd never seen overeem against a big wrestler and i'm like if he if he can't stuff the takedown he's gonna be in a lot of trouble. But, man, once he stuffed that takedown, he stuffed the first one. You know, it wasn't even like a real power double. Brock didn't really go at him.

I wonder if Brock was, like, worried about the knees. That's probably what it was, right? Why do you think he retired? Did he retire because of the disease? Well, first of all, who knows? You know, you'd have to ask him. And second of all, I got to think'd have to ask him and second of all i gotta think that you have surgery on your fucking intestines and then a few months later they're

getting kneed by alistair ovarian i don't see how that can be good you know and what's his face eric paulson quote um posted something um somebody put it up on the underground that uh brock didn't need to be taking those shots That his body's not healed yet You know, makes sense to me, man I don't know how quick you heal up I mean, you might feel healed up But are you healed up enough to take an Alistair Overeem liver kick?

I mean, your whole insides got operated on They removed 12 inches of his colon What is the recovery time for something like that Where you're back to 100 if you're ever back to 100 i don't know it's just it would all be speculation you know i think he might come back really i think after time if you look at the history of boxing it's not like he's made you know 100 million dollars has he has he made like 100 million not 100 million but he's made several million i'm sure the ufc's paid him well, and he does really well pay-per-view.

Like his last fight, the Overeem fight was over $800,000, I believe, as independently being reported. The UFC is a private company, so they don't have to give the report. So I think it's kind of a sketchy number. It's often not completely accurate, but there's sources, and sources have estimates, and the estimate was really high, that they did something like 800,000, which is attributable to Brock's popularity.

At the end of the day, Brock Lesnar's a fucking goddamn superstar. Yeah. It just seems like in boxing, these guys, the guys that have made tens of millions each fight, it seems like they just keep coming back, a combination of they need money, like they got busted in taxes or something, they blew all their money, or they just come back just for the machismo well brock is not that guy

first of all he's not like a flashy guy you ever see the car he drives he drives like a little toyota tursell like a little red toyota yeah really it's ridiculous wow yeah he lives in a rural house with the only reason why he got television is so that he could get hunting shows and he uh he got the internet or he doesn't even have the internet rather and he just goes hunting that's what he likes to do he hunts and farms and he likes like being with his family and he's just a different kind of dude i think he was really burned out by that wrestling life the life of pro wrestling i think all that travel and all those injuries i mean that guy had some serious fucking injuries.

There's a video of him jumping off the top rope and flipping, and he misses the flip and lands on his head. Do we have that? Have you ever seen that video? I haven't seen it. I think it's Brock Lesnar shooting Star Press, I think it's called. Dude, it is the most ridiculous shit you've ever seen in your life. You don't even know how a man can survive something like this. He essentially does a flip and lands on his head

and is still conscious. I think this is a bold statement, but I'm going to say this. If somebody brought up Brock Lesnar the right way, watch this shit. Yeah, look at the size of him. Oh, shit. That was fucked up.

Look at him holding his head, man. Damn. Did he get taken out on a stretcher? Oh! That could have killed his ass easily. Oh, my God. Look at that. Wow.

How long was he out for that? Did he need surgery? I don't know, man. Did he have neck surgery or something? I don't know. But when you look at that, you're like, how is he not paralyzed? Jesus Christ. What an athlete.

Is there video of him, like, running on his hands? I don't know if there's video of it, but he can do it. That's incredible. That's what I've heard. I think that Brock Lesnar could have been one of the all-time greats if they brought him up the right way. I think, really, what they fucked up with Brock Lesnar is that they jumped him right away into the UFC.

First fight in, he's fighting a former heavyweight champion. Ridiculous. I think if they were smart, if Brock Lesnar had, I mean, Brock Lesnar believes in himself, and he obviously thought that he was the baddest motherfucker on earth, and he obviously thought he was just going to go in there and take everybody down and smash them in the fucking face. But if he had a confidant, a really intelligent person that's going to stand back and go, listen, dude, you have shitty stand-up. You know, you're standing.

You're a powerful puncher. You're a powerful guy, but do you think you could have a kickboxing fight with Remy Bonjasky? No? Well, until you can have a kickboxing fight with Remy Bonjasky, you shouldn't be fighting anybody who can kickbox like Remy Bonjasky. So what are we doing jumping you into a fight with a guy like Alistair Overeem when you're still relatively a novice at striking? You've got to dedicate yourself to Muay Thai.

He should have been going to fucking Thailand. They should have had that guy doing camps in Thailand. And, you know, they had him working with Comprido. His fucking jiu-jitsu was getting nasty. You know, you saw that with the Shane Carwin finish. When he finished Shane Carwin, he did it perfect. You know, he's such a powerful dude. His jiu-jitsu could have been awesome if he just fully dedicated himself to it.

But when a guy gets beat up like he did in the Shane Carwin fight and then rebounds and then gets beat up in the Cain Velasquez fight and then gets beat up in the Alistair Overeem fight, at a certain point in time, that guy's not going to want to do that anymore. And I don't think it needed to happen that way because those deficits that he had all could have been shored up. The guy's not going to want to do that anymore. And I don't think it needed to happen that way. Because those deficits that he had all could have been shored up. The guy's a fucking super athlete. If you taught him

how to really kickbox, if you brought him to Ernesto Hoost, and he spent a couple months in Holland, or brought those guys to Minnesota and have him train up there, that guy if he had taken a few years and slowly worked his way through tougher

and tougher opponents, I think he could have been one of the best of all time. But it's just like Cain Velasquez or just like any of these guys. If they immediately jumped into the deep end and fought the toughest guys in their first fight ever, you're not going to do as good. You're not going to develop your skills as well. You've

always said this, that it's really hard for guys once they've made it to hone their skills or add other skills. It becomes very difficult because guys don't want to get tapped out. Guys don't want to get beat up and kickboxing. Because they're famous now. Yeah. It's tough, man.

There's a lot of UFC fighters out there that just, they won't just walk into a room and just wrestle and, you know, do ju-jitsu with just anybody because you know they don't want to get tapped out it's and then there's some that just don't give a fuck yeah those are the best guys yeah i've seen rico rico rodriguez let himself get put in bad positions and and tap you know because he couldn't get out of them but i know rico i know how good rico is we go like let himself get in spots he's working on some shit he's you know i've seen him just get into you know just jump into class and just start rolling with people you know um going to thailand and going to amsterdam that's when someone does that when a fighter does that it usually comes off a

loss and their striking was exposed that's the they're trying to do the best thing they could do for their striking you really should every fighter should do the best possible thing they could do for their striking not necessarily just train. Every fighter should do the best possible thing they could do for their striking. Not necessarily just train with your buddy because he'll hold pads for you. You've got to constantly evolve your striking. And the same thing with the wrestling. You've got to find the best. What I would do for wrestling if I was a fighter, what I would do is because,

you know, the hardest thing for a wrestler to do is, is, uh, transition into MMA, like time, those takedowns with a punching and the striking. And the best guy that that's ever lived with to do that as GSP, you know, if you're not studying GSP, if you're not studying the way he's taken dudes down, he's got that down to a science.

He's got more. And I was saying this in class the other day, he's got more takedowns in MMA than probably anybody. Yeah, well, he has totally dedicated himself to wrestling. The same way he solely dedicated himself to karate. It's more than that, though. It's wrestling, but he's got a rhythm and he's got a timing. He's throwing combinations.

He's shooting at the right time because he's got to avoid the strikes. And that's what every wrestler needs to do is study GSP. Take all of his takedowns in the UFC. If you just took all of his takedowns and put them together in one DVD, you study that shit like football players study other teams and their tendencies and what they're doing. That's what they do at the elite levels in all major sports is they study film. They study what's going on. And if you're not studying GSP, you're not doing the most you can do. He is the best.

He's taking everybody down. There's not anybody out there that he hasn't taken down. And he's a really good striker, too, but he's not relying on his striking. He's just striking just the time that power double that he always does he does it on everybody you know you got to be studying that well what he's doing is everything what gsp is doing is everything his guard is nasty his kicks are nasty his punches are nasty i don't think we've even seen his guard too much maybe just i mean i i can't did he catch matt hughes from his guard no what did he catch him he caught him

in an arm bar it wasn't from his guard um i think he was in the mount and he was kind of rolling off or something it wasn't that's a that's a good question i don't know exactly how he said it took down cost check man that's incredible i mean obviously that's not a wrestling match because it's uh bj penn was hard as to take down their first fight man it's like when he shoots for that double he jumps like he's got this incredible leapfrog ability where he grabs you no matter how much you sprawl he's just gonna take you up in the air you're not even touching the ground there's a lot of technical shit going on the way he's merged striking and takedowns is unbelievable study him study dominant cruise dominant cruise it has this unique striking style that's working and

we've seen one guy already emulate it uh Gustafsson he's emulating and he's made it work as well too yeah you know that there might be something there you know you know movement a lot of extreme movement very difficult to time you know one of the things about GSP is how fucking powerful his legs are he could drive through dudes you know when you see him when he gets into the octagon he's warming up he's like sprinting across the the octagon is the spring in that motherfucker's legs you know the way he's able to do that i don't know what it would have as box jumping you know i know he does a lot of those uh hurdle jumping and shit i don't know what exactly he's doing to get that kind of spring, but, you know, I mean, that enhances everything. Brian, what is that?

Is that your fucking phone? No. What's that meowing? I think it's coming from outside. That ain't a cat, man. You just touched something. You had some shit going on up there, motherfucker. Yeah.

You know, when you watch the guy kick, man, I mean, that's a lot of that. All of his power comes from that spring that slam like when that matt hughes highlight that brian just showed when he hit that switch kick and kicked him in the head you know he's got so much snap into everything you know yeah dominic cruz has got a very unique fighting style and it's working it's crazy that him and uriah are going to go at it again that should be very interesting it's going to be very interesting what do you think's going to happen uriah is tougher than ever now it's yeah you know it's who knows that's a complete toss-up they're both amazing yeah well the second fight was an amazing back and forth fight super close

too and i guess they're gonna coach the ultimate fighter now good move i like that yeah well these 135 pound guys the smaller guys they're like to me the the most uh exciting guys 35 145 those guys you know but it's kind of funny that like he just jumps right back in you know and then there's another dude hannon barrow have you seen that guy fight has he fought in the UFC? Yeah, he's fought a few times. Is he Brazilian?

Yeah. Fuck, he's awesome, man. Let's see him. How do you spell his name? Hennon Barau. It's R-E-N-A-N.

Let me see if I can find a video online. He's one of those Nova and Yao guys. Yeah, the lighter weight divisions are, they're going to get flooded with Asians because right now MMA in Asia is exploding. Brian, this is a highlight Hennon Burrell video. It's R-E-N-A-N-B-A-R-A-O. And he's one of these dudes that's coming out of Brazil.

One of these Nova União guys. Like, there's so many good guys in that camp. Like, Diego Nunes, Jose Aldo. All these dudes that are in that camp with this dude. That's like a, they got a fucking pressure cooker, man. You know what I like about Diego Nunes? How do you say his first name again? Henan.

R-E-N-A-N. I love Diego Nunes. Barão. B-A-R-A-O. His striking. Nunez. Baral, B-A-R-A-L. His striking, his kicks. You know, you look at someone like that, if you're not throwing kicks like Diego Nunez and like Kung Lee,

there's a part of the game that, you know, that you need to work on. Yeah. They're proving, guys like Diego Nunez, right? Yeah. Guys like him and Kung Lee and John Jonesones they're proving that there's a lot to work on when it comes to stand up there's a lot of kicks that you need to work on yeah well you know there's other things that are effective you know that we still haven't seen axe kicks very

rarely do we see an axe kick also some guy did throw that in a recent fight it was a real quick youtube clip you probably saw where a guy hit a dude in the face of a 360 roundhouse kick yeah well he threw an axe kick before that that guy was a some sort of a karate fighter you could tell by the way he's throwing his kicks he just had serious power to him and there's been a couple guys at least two maybe three or four capoeira style kicks which are the craziest kicks land in mma if you go to YouTube and punch up... Yeah, those are wheel kicks. It's a spinning wheel kick. Crazy MMA KO. This guy, this Hennon Baralke, he's one of the best at 135.

And whoever fights... I mean, he's just like Aldo. Very similar, man. Really explosive, though, and crazy knees. And awesome jiu-jitsu as well. Whoever fights him next it's going to be very interesting because whoever wins the Dominic Cruz, Uriah

Faber rubber match they're going to have to fight this kid, I think. Most likely. I mean this kid just... So he blew up in Shudo? Just beat Brad Pickett in tremendous fashion. He fought in Shudo. He fought everywhere, man. This guy fought everywhere. But he's awesome. He's got crazy knees, man.

He throws his knees out of nowhere. There's one. Boom. Yeah, and his jiu-jitsu is nasty. There's so many guys now with great black belted jiu-jitsu and they're vicious strikers. So many dudes. Especially in Brazil. There's Nova União guys.

So many of those guys are killer strikers. And you know who I'm excited about this weekend, man? Toquinho. Mike Misenzio is fighting Paul Harris. Man, how is that guy going to avoid Paul Harris? You know? Misenzio's going to have to box and move, man. He's going to have to box and move.

Misenzio's a good wrestler, though, right? He's like a brown belt in jiu-jitsu, isn't he? To be honest, I don't know that much about him. Yeah, he's a tough guy. You know, he have to stick and move stick and move yeah paul harris is you don't want that guy grabbing a hold of a fucking leg yeah he's the best in my opinion at leg locks in uh in the ufc iminari and him are real close you know the iminari is pretty goddamn badass yeah you know but as, but as far as in the UFC, Paul Harris is the best at leg locks. He just dives on those. For sure.

M&R has some wild leg lock finishes. We haven't. There's so many guys out there that are amazing at leg locks. And we haven't really seen anyone win a championship with leg locks, you know. The closest we've seen is like Frank Mir with that knee bar against Brock. Imanari's had so many heel hooks. God damn it, he's got so many. I would say that Imanari's the best at heel hooks.

That's what I would say. But definitely Paul Harris is up there, especially in the UFC. In the UFC, he's probably the best leg lock guy, no doubt. Yeah, you know, what's his face? Best leg lock guy, no doubt. Yeah, you know, what's his face? Brock Lesnar is actually very lucky that Steve Mazzagati didn't fuck up to the point where Frank Mir broke his leg. Because Frank Mir could have broke his fucking leg easily.

You know, he was tapping, and Mazzagati still did not get Frank to let go. And Frank was still yanking on his knee. You think of all the shit that Frank has done. Frank has broke more bones in the UFC than anybody. He broke Roberto Traven's arm in his first fight. He broke Tim Sylvia's forearm in half. Some shit I never saw before. And then he breaks fucking Minotauro's upper arm in half. And he almost broke Pete Williams's shoulder off.

Yeah, that's right. Yeah. What was that crazy submission that he had? It was like an inverted key lock. That was like 2002. Yeah. What was that that he hit him with? It was an Americana from the guard.

Yeah. He like overhooked his arm and torqued it and put, where did he put his shin? His left shin. Yeah. He put it across his belly. The left shin across the belly. Where did he put his shin? His left shin. Yeah. He put it across his belly. The left shin across the belly. And where's the right shin? Across the outside to keep him from moving.

Right. And he twisted him. Yeah. He had the left shin across that. And the right shin was on the outside of the left side of that guy's body. And the right calf was pushing in. And the shin was pushing out. And he was like bent sideways.

And he yanked his arm. That was a dope ass submission. It's like catching. You catch those arm bars when you have a full overhook, and then the guy tries to pull out of the overhook, but he only gets halfway out, and then you torque it right there. It's really hard to set up. You just got to take it when that window of opportunity presents itself in a split second. Frank Miras, really, that guy's gone through the craziest whirlwind you know you talk about like the beginning of that guy's career you know he

came out guns blazing you know he was like one of the best guys then he gets beat up by ian freeman remember he was going for that heel hook and he just committed to the heel hook and ian freeman just pounded him out you know he was committed two hands to one leg and ian just kept punching him in the face while he was going for it. And then he tried to get up, and he face-planted. I mean, he was just completely out of it. So then he's got to rebuild himself, and then he comes back again. Then he gets in that motorcycle accident, you know, and fuck, he's gone for, like, over a year, right?

And then when he comes back, he's still not the same, can't train right, he's got pain in his legs. He lost a patepano. Yeah, he got stopped by patepono right didn't he yeah he got stopped by brandon vera yep yep he the pettipano fight was strange because he had pettipano in half guard when you would think that frank muir would have took him down yeah his pettipano is a jiu jitsu guy great jiu-jitsu Fighter and he was on top of Frank and Frank had him in half guard. He just got pounded on Yeah, it's kind of amazing that that Frank Rebounded from that like so ferociously it was it was you know, people were thinking that his Yeah, he was never gonna he's never gonna be the same again

Meanwhile the the best days are yet to come Yeah then you look later like the Czech Czech-Congo knockout, and then he strangles him when he blasts him with that left hand and then puts him to sleep with the guillotine. And then, of course, the Minotaur fight. First one and the second one. Both of them were crazy.

Even though he won both fights, I would love to see a third match. I would like to see a third match just because it was awesome. Minotaur had him in all sorts of trouble man he had Frank Mir dazed yeah if he and then apparently the referee saying don't hit the back of the head and he was you know trying to finish him that's when he decided to go for the guillotine yeah that was the beginning but I think he wanted to prove something with jitsu too like I'm beating this guy up he's out let me just put a guillotine you know he thought he was just so confident. He fucked up.

God, that's going to haunt him. His arm's going to be fucked for a long time, too. He's got plates in there and everything. That was the first time I've ever saw a guy's upper arm get shattered like that. It snapped. Like, you could see something was wrong. Something, whether it dislocated. You couldn't tell what happened.

But there was a pop and a shift. And Minotaur, like, looked down at his arm, like, sideways. It was like, oh, he knew it was fucked minotaur was probably the one of the worst guys on the planet to tap you know what i mean as far as like he does he never taps so he doesn't know when to tap like guys that get tapped all the time they get they become black belts at tapping like i know when to tap yeah i don't want to get hurt yeah i know exactly when to tap but he doesn't he's like what am i supposed to tap? I never tap. That's funny.

He probably thought he could get out of it somehow or another, you know. But when a guy like Frank Mir, he's too fucking big. When you got a guy that big, that much power, that much strength and technique on top of it. Perfect technique and power and strength. And you know that roll that he did when he caught the Kimura when he was on top and Minotaur rolled him? He does that on purpose. That's how he gets out of the half guard he over commits the Kimura and he actually goes down on his forehead so that the guy will be inclined to roll him and he just keeps the momentum going and rolls him over again and winds up in the perfect position to finish Rafael Mendez

a huge jiu-jitsu star he does that all the time I'm working that into my game too it's nice it's good to get up from the bottom from that. I like that from half guard. You can get up from the bottom from that if you can catch it. You've got to be careful that you don't give up that deep hook. If a guy's got a good arm bar counter when you're going for the Kimura.

When you're going for a Kimura, you've got to make sure the guy doesn't turn it around on you. If he spins the right way, just like Carlos Newton Pele, old school pride fight. Pele had Carlos Newton in a Kimura, and Carlos Newton turned it around on him. And same thing with Matt Hughes and GSP back in the day. And, of course, Sakuraba and Conan. Yes.

That was the first time we saw a Brazilian jiu-jitsu black belt get tapped. That was huge. Yeah. Sakuraba, this crazy Japanese guy, was undersized. He was only like 190 pounds. Fought Conan, who was fucking enormous. Giant dude, all tattooed up, scary motherfucker. You know?

Yeah. He was the great Brazilian hope for a while, Conan. Yeah, he was. He was like one of the only Brazilians who was huge, and he was a black belt in jiu-jitsu. Yeah, but when Maury Smith head kicked him, that changed a lot of things. Maury Smith was the first guy to bring high-level kickboxing to MMA. Dude did not know what was up.

He was leg kicking him, leg kicking him, and they were like, okay, ow, what the fuck, how do I get out of this? And boom, head kick coming. He was like taking candy from a baby when he was first compete That was the first head kick in the in pretty much and then a pretty much first head kick chaos tell about it It also shows what a nice guy Maurice is dude It was just clearly out and Maurice got like right in front of him It's like come on man, and the doc stopped it was like listen this shit's over the crazy thing is that Conan never hit the ground

Yeah, stop that he was still standing from one head, and he kind of like caught himself on the fence, but he was out. And when they called the fight, he raised his hand like he thought he won. Yeah, he thought he won. That's right. I totally forgot about that. You know, Maury Smith is fighting again.

He's 51 years old. He's fighting Tim Haig. Wow. Yeah. 51, man. Isn't that crazy? Damn. Yeah. What do you think about that it's unfortunate i wish he had a successful coaching career and he didn't have to do that you know i don't think a guy

should be taking that kind of punishment deep into his 50s or in 40s 50s you know i think a lot of these guys uh you know maurice is a perfect example of a guy who was big in the sport he was the heavyweight champion back when you know know, it was no one understood it. Nobody, there wasn't that many guys in it. It wasn't a big sport. It was banned from cable. We were only on satellite TV back then. When Maurice beat Mark Coleman, to me,

that was like one of the upsets, the greatest upsets ever in MMA history. Absolutely. You know, I was there for that, dude. I couldn't believe how calm Maurice was. And you know what Maurice always says? Maurice is like you know um kickboxing is way harder than this and I go it is and he goes yeah he goes kickboxing you're

gonna get fucked up guaranteed he goes these guys they don't know how to punch they know how to kick he goes all you have to do is have good cardio I was like wow like that's ridiculous I was like this guy's gonna go fight Mark Coleman and that was his attitude and the pre-fight little montage of him they interview him and they show him working out they showed him running stairs yeah that was his attitude and the pre-fight little montage of him they interview him and they show him working out they showed him running stairs yeah that was his shit yeah he was running stairs yeah and Mark Coleman was like picking up picking dudes up and slamming them well Maurice was one of the first guys to have like really high level cardio and he actually uh instilled that in Frank Shamrock too Frank Shamrock also was one of the first guys that had really high

level cardio and what those guys made sure is that they could keep, like, a pace that you couldn't keep up with. That's the Nick Diaz strategy. What Nick Diaz does is put a pace on dudes that you're just not going to be able to keep up with, and we're going to start running, and I'm going to force you to run at my pace. You could pretend that you could run at this pace for 15 minutes, but we both know you can't.

So, you know, I'll see you in, like, seven minutes or something, whenever I'm going to be beating your ass. It might be five minutes from now. It might be seven. Whatever. There's going to come a time where you're not going to be able to deal with this pace I'm putting on you, and you're going to start to wilt. And that's what happens to dudes.

They just can't believe how deep he can take it. Did you see that shot someone put up on the Internet of Nate Diaz-Ceroni before the last round? Like they're about to. Oh, when Nate Diaz is double fingering him? last round. Like they're about to... Oh, when Nate Diaz is double fingering him? Yeah, and then they cut to Cerrone, and Cerrone is like, he's out of gas. He's done. Well, he got fucked up in that first round.

He got really outboxed in that first round. That's what it is, man. And Nate's got... He had the highest accuracy rate that we ever measured on CompuStrike. I got to see that. It was more than... I see it was more than eight i think was more than 82 percent which is crazy 82 of your punches landing that's that's really

ridiculous like no one has that kind of accuracy that dude is just getting really good man him and his brother at the same time but they're like peaking you know they're both like turning corners you know i mean i was impressed with uh with nick and all of his strike force fights but when he came over and just just outboxed bj like that i mean that was just wow i never saw bj get beat up on his feet like that we never saw that before we saw bj get beat up on the ground held down and beat up but we never saw a guy just you know just put it to him like that over and over again and And BJ recently complained about it. It was kind of crazy.

BJ said something about, what was that weak-ass shit you tried wearing me out, like trying to wear out the smaller man. I thought we were going to scrap from the beginning. And it's crazy. He had some crazy complaint about the way Nick Diaz fought him, that he didn't fight him the manly way. He had a couple complaints complaints, a couple of things like after the fight, Nick Diaz went up to Jason Perillo. Yeah. And talk some shit. Yeah. What did he say? I don't know.

But there's video of it. And he was pissed off at that. He was pissed off at what happened at the weigh ins. That pissed him off. And then he saw the fight And saw that I didn't see it But I don't know if it happened or not But he's claiming that Nick Diaz was holding the fence And that kind of shit I don't know man

I hate to see It done that way I just hate to see it I hate to see it come up with any sort of excuses I could see you saying Listen I think your attitude sucks and I want to do it again. You know, you beat me the first time. I want to do it again. It's a crazy fucking sport.

You got to be a crazy animal to get in there for, you know, what? What BJ said. So what? Like, there's people on the underground like, oh, I'm I'm no longer a fan of BJ. He just lost a fan. Like, dude, give me a fucking break. These guys are crazy animals. They're super emotional.

You know how fucking insane you have to be? Yeah, you got to be a wild person to be doing that in the first place, man. Yeah, so, yeah, of course he's going to say some shit. So what? I'll be a, if there was video of BJ sucking someone's dick, I would still be a fan for the rest of my life What if he was doing a terrible job? What if he was sucking someone's dick

And it was just awful? He was dragging his teeth And he was crying a lot I would like him more I'd go, you know what? He doesn't look like he does this very often Okay, okay What if you found a video of BJ sucking dick

And he was doing it like a champion? What if he was just working the ball? Really good I would still respect him even more I would still respect him Hey man, if you're gonna suck a dick be good at it right that's like some good old fashioned american work ethic yeah you know obviously we're joking yeah my point is you you're not gonna like bj penn because he's fucking emotional over a loss well i mean people people are real sensitive to people coming up with excuses. And because people recognize

that that is some sort of a weakness. And people are hypercritical of fighters because fighters, when you're on television, you're like a Superman and you're held up to the highest ideals. We want you to have the highest character. We want you to be funny and charming and we want you to be a lethal assassin.

We want you to be the leader. We want you to be the highest character. We want you to be funny and charming, and we want you to be a lethal assassin. We want you to be the leader. We want you to be the uber person, the best person possible. And when we see a flaw, a flaw like that in a fighter is magnified. You know, if that was a flaw between two chicks that got in a fight at work, and one girl pulled the girl's hair and punched her in the face in the toilet, and the other girl's like, bitch, why are you holding on my hair? You know, you think that's the only way you could beat me is hold my hair? And everybody's like, let it go, let it go. you know you think that's the only way you could beat me is hold my hair and everybody's like let it go let it go you know it could you know it

could be the same sort of conversation and no one would really judge it they would go oh yeah well she got a little crazy she's all emotional but because it's a professional fighter and a super champion like bj two division champion all-time great bj penna is a straight hall of famer no doubt about it he's one of the greatest mixed martial arts guys ever. You go back to his greatest performances, like the Diego Sanchez fight, flawless. The Kenny Florian fight, flawless. The Sean Shurt fight, flawless. Yeah, you know, BJ Penn is the only dude that's going up in weight to fight the best.

To fight anybody. He's fighting the best. Everybody is killing themselves to get as light as possible. They're losing 20 pounds, 15 pounds. BJ is the only guy not going up in weight because there have been fighters to go up in weight. Like Anderson Silva did it. He fought James Irvin.

You know, that takes a lot of balls. BJ fought heavyweight, bro. Yeah, he fought Liotta when Liotta was a heavyweight. BJ, whether he wins or loses, he's, I mean. He's awesome. Nobody has bigger balls than BJ. And you know, and Nick Diaz,

people are like, oh, he has a bad attitude. I hate that shit. He's flipping everybody off. I'm like, man, we need that in the sport. I like that. You know, he's flipped off

so many goddamn people. It's like, it's almost like he's saying, hello, how you doing? It's like, big deal. That's just Nick Diaz. That's his shit. Now imagine if he made the perfect blowjob to on top of all that.

I love Nick Diaz's attitude. There was this one video that I posted on Twitter recently. You know, it was like a cartoon type picture type thing of an interview he did. And he's talking about weed and all that shit. It was amazing. It was so entertaining. I would way rather watch a Nick Diaz interview than a lot of motherfuckers out there. You know what I mean?

There's a lot of guys out there who go, yeah, this is my best training camp. I trained really hard for this. Got my wrestling together. I'm going to go out there and, you know, may the best man win. Fuck that. I mean, everybody says that.

This was a great fight. We should welcome the bad attitude that Nick Diaz and Nate Diaz bring to the sport. It's entertaining. You remember this one? The one where BJ tapped Matt Hughes when he got his back? That was BJ. The post-fight interview is the best. BJ was dominant, man.

God damn, he was good. Look how good that fight was. Look at that pass. Fuck, he was awesome. Yeah, BJ is an all-time great man. You'll never hear me say a bad thing about BJ. But if I was in his corner, if I was one of his boys and I was hanging with him, I would say, you know what, there's a way to address this.

Is this in Japan? That's not the way to address it. There's a way to address this. Look at this. Yeah, people forget about this. He fucked Gomi up, dude. When Gomi was the man, he brought Gomi over to his backyard and beat the shit out of him, all right? When Gomi was, nobody wanted to fight Gomi up, dude. When Gomi was the man, he brought Gomi over to his backyard and beat the shit out of him, all right?

When Gomi was, nobody wanted to fight Gomi. When Gomi was like one of the top lightweights in the world, BJ flew him to fucking Japan and had him fight on Rumble on the Rock and just owned him. He was the first guy to really own Takanori Gomi. Took his back and just fucked him up. He arm-triangled Dwayne Ludwig. Dwayne Ludwig, that was nice.

Yeah, easy, man. Look, BJ, and this was after he had left the UFC, man. fucked him up the arm triangle dwayne ludwig dwayne ludwig that was nice yeah easy man look bj and this was what after he had left the ufc man you know i was still a fan you know they were having lawsuits and shit i'm like i don't give a fuck dude i know there's some legal shit involved but i'm a goddamn bj penn fan that guy can fight look at this shit oh my, my God. Yeah, dude. He was a killer, dude. But you know what, man? Look at that. That's the craziest one, the Gomi fight. Look at Gomi.

Gomi is just jacked and bloody. That was Joe Stevenson. No, that was Gomi. He got them both the same way. Well, I'm looking at this screen, bro. Oh, you're a little behind. He got Gomi first. Sorry.

Yeah, we're like a two-second delay away from each other. This was the fuck. That was a scary one right there, man. Yeah, BJ Penn is an all-time great, man. But he, you know, you shouldn't. I just don't agree with the way he did it. You know, if he wanted to say something to Nick Diaz, it should be calculated and it should be, you know, more reserved.

I like it because now there might be a rematch yeah maybe let's see the rematch i would love to see part two are you kidding i would rather see them fight at a lighter weight where bj is more comfortable i don't know if nick could lose the way i would love it either way if they went up to 200 i would love it i think for bj though it'd be best if he fought him at a lighter weight but i don't know if nick nias can make a lighter weight anymore nick's pretty goddamn big you know he looks he looks like a full blown 170 now i mean he's thick as fuck he looked a lot bigger than bj when they were in the cage together he's got a pace man it's just it's kind of crazy i'm fascinated by those dudes that are like super

cardio freaks you know because it really is the right thing to do because they know that they can just keep coming at you keep coming coming at you, keep coming at you, and eventually you just can't keep up. You just can't keep up. You know what's crazy? I saw a video of, like a home video of Nick and Nate, and they're like in full Lance Armstrong gear, and it's so weird because to me,

or to the world, they would appear like in, to dress, I would think they would dress like cholos, you know, like gang bangs, right? You would think that they would dress like cholos. You know, like gangbangers. Right? You would think that they would always be with their, you know, with their gangsters. But they're not gangbangers. They're just badasses. You know what I'm saying?

Like, you don't need an outfit. Their attitude appears to be that way. Oh, you know, don't be scared, homie. That's what, like, gangbangers say in shit. Sort of, man. Stockton and all that shit. The thing is, most gangbangers are kind of, I mean, a lot of them at least, they're not down to fight on TV like that. They're not down to expose themselves.

What percentage of gangbangers would be willing to have an MMA career like Nate Diaz and Nick Diaz? You would need some serious discipline to be that kind of a fighter. Dude, they don't even know that it exists. They don't have cable. Come on.

Gangbangers don't have cable? No, they're poor. They're that poor? They steal a lot of things and then they get cable, cable i think and then they find out about fights i think you're crazy i think they're on the streets man i don't think they're watching tv on saturday nights i think they're out there gangbanging doing gangbang related activities you grew up in santa ana how close is that to gangbang area? Well, the neighborhood I was in was all Mexican. Santa Ana is in Orange County, and most of Santa Ana was white. And most of Orange County was white, and Santa Ana was like the East LA of Orange County. That's where they put all the gardeners and the people that clean the house. Everyone lived in Santa Ana.

So it was like all Mexican. But in my block, we were all Mexican. All the kids growing up, we were into rock. You know, we were like, we weren't, we were surrounded by Cholos, but our block, we were into Rush and, you know, Kiss, obviously. And everyone had their own band, Van Halen. Everyone had their own band that they were into. We were, you know, playing football.

We were into taking the bus to the beach and, you know, boogie boarding. And we were into white people stuff. We weren't really into gang banging stuff. White people stuff. Yeah. Didn't you do like something crazy, like switch schools and well, just to get out of the. Yeah. Well, in in elementary school.

It was it was mostly Mexican, but there wasn't any gangbangers in elementary. It starts in sixth grade when you go to junior high. Everything starts to shift. When I went to junior high, which was sixth, seventh, and eighth, my aunt was very popular, and she was in the eighth grade. My mom and my grandma were having kids around the same time. I grew up with two aunts who were the same age.

She was in eighth grade, real popular and beautiful, and I was in sixth grade. Everybody in my family, they dressed like gangbangers just so they wouldn't be fucked with. My brother dressed like a gangbanger and claimed a gang, middle side, just so he wouldn't get fucked with. I chose to go to school, and I'm like, dude, I'm going to go in ocean Pacific stuff

and lightning bolt like surfer type uh clothing and when i got there everyone you know there was the blacks and there was the mexicans you had to dress like a gangbanger everyone might and my aunt dressed like a chola but she wasn't a gangbanger but you just had to dress like one so just everyone leaves you alone how weird is that yeah just to blend in high school is fucking terrifying man just a blend in and i refused to blend in and never and i'll never forget steve calhoun came up to me and people didn't like me because you mezge man why are you dressing like a white boy you mezge man don't forget that i'm like oh shit man this is it got hairy sounds like a black joey diaz yeah don't forget where you come

from yeah it got hairy and um this is what this is what happened was I started dating a girl in the seventh grade and a girl in the seventh grade never dates dudes in the sixth grade but since I got I was instantly popular because my aunt Patty in the eighth grade was like she was the most popular chick everybody loved her like oh look at his nephew you know so that Sabrinarina was the seventh grade that i started dating but i when i broke up with her to date a sixth grader margaret sabrina the seventh grader was so like she felt so betrayed and she felt uh that she got guys to try to kick my ass now i had these dudes like pulling me behind like the uh like the locker room and threatened to kick my ass because she's it got too hairy and I decided

that I was going to transfer myself to an all-white school clear across town I had to use my aunt's address and my mom had no idea she had zero idea I just told my mom oh I'm going to a new school next year it's you know it's better education my mom was okay cool so when my when I signed up for this new school I was like leaving leaving my old life and all of a sudden I'm in, okay, cool. So when I signed up for this new school, I was like leaving my old life and all of a sudden I'm in a school that's all white and I'm like a full-blown loner, zero friends. And that became really, really hard too, man, being a fucking loner at a school.

So I went from being too popular where people wanted to fuck me up that I had to transfer myself to another school. Now I'm at a school, no one wants to fuck me up. But I had to transfer myself to another school. Now I'm in a school. No one wants to fuck me up. No one even notices me. I'm a total loner loser in the seventh grade. It was a sad times.

This is your life, Eddie Bravo. This is your life. Dude, lunch. Did you think about high school, man? That is the scariest time of your life. It's the most insecure time of your life. The most terrifying time of your life. You got to do a bunch of your life. Yeah. The most terrifying time of your life. You gotta do a bunch of shit you don't want to do every day.

You go into classes. They're teaching you boring shit. You're not doing well at it. So they're telling you you're gonna be a loser. At least for me. And you know your fucking future is in jeopardy, man. You don't know what the fucking future holds. And you're trying to not get your ass kicked everywhere. Yeah. I was so lucky I skated through high school with

minimal physical confrontation. But the so lucky. I skated through high school with minimal physical confrontation. But the most important one I lost, most important one was this dude who was just, we're just, we're kind of friendly, but not really. It wasn't like we're buddies, but it was like, hey man, I'd say hey man to him, you know, in the hallway. And he was joking around with his buddies and he wrestled me to the ground. He like flipped me to the ground, like got me like, a headlock and gave me a hip toss. And didn't hurt me.

Just sat on top of me. And I couldn't get up. And I was like, God damn. I felt so humiliated. I was, like, 14 or 15. I think I was 14. And I said, well, I got to learn how to fucking wrestle. This is ridiculous.

I couldn't believe that this dude could do that to me. And thank God he didn't, like, do it. He didn't decide to just beat me up once he held me down. He just, he was laughing about it. You know, he was, he just clowned me, you know? And I was like, wow, I, I'm a little bitch. I need to learn how to deal with this shit. You know, those are important, man.

There's a video, an article that I read recently said, never trust a man who's never been punched in the face. And you know, it's not fucking fortunate, but God damn it. It's true. You know, never trust a dude who's never been tested. in the face and you know it's not fucking fortunate but god damn it it's true you know never trust a dude who's never been tested you know i mean think about how easy it is you know we always talk about this how easy it is to hang out with jujitsu guys like most good jujitsu guys are really free of ego and bullshit they usually pretty fucking chill deal with yeah to do jujitsu

generally in the beginning at least you have to have a very small ego because you're going to get tapped out. Well, you have to have control of it. I wouldn't say you have to have a small one, but you have to have control of it. You can't be a bitch. I mean, that's really what it is. To get good at it, you're going to tangle with dudes. You better have some fucking character. There's some people that never face adversity.

They never face physical adversity, and they're terrified of it. They never face physical adversity and they're terrified of it they never face mental adversity the adversity they've had some sort of an easy non testing job and that's that's how they function in and out of every day and when you're in that situation you're like a fucking car that's never been pushed past 50 you don't even know how to drive that thing you don't even know what the fuck's happening your wheels shaking and it's making noise and there's fucking smoke coming out of the back you know you don't even know how to drive that thing you don't even know what the fuck's happening your wheels shaking and it's making noise and there's fucking smoke coming out of the back you know you don't even know what the fuck can do with your body when it gets into a bad situation it's it's hard to it's hard to appreciate the amount of character development that a person needs to be a man with

personal sovereignty you know to be a man who's like in control of his own shit. There's a lot of goddamn personal maintenance that has to go on, you know, and one of them is you kind of kind of know what you're dealing with. You got to know what you're dealing with as far as your body goes. You got to know what you're dealing with as far as your personality goes. Like how much can you keep your shit together under stress? How much can you focus on on victory and staying calm and following strategy and not freaking out in the moment? There's a lot of different things that go on in your head when you have to manage things

at a high level in any sort of martial arts situation that there's a lot of people that never experienced that in their life. You experience on a regular basis some life or death battles with another man who's really good at jujitsu. You know, you were telling me about this dude that had just come into the school, and, you know, you had some good rolls with him, you know, and you were showing him some rubber guard stuff that he hadn't seen before. And, you know, when you were talking to me about it, I'm like,

this is a really funny conversation because essentially what you're saying is, like, oh, a train killer came into town today and me and the train killer, well, he killed some of my students and they practiced on each other, they practiced killing each other and he got them first and then I got him a bunch of times and showed him some shit. It was a real fun role. We were talking about how fun it was. But meanwhile, what you did was you just fought to the death

and you just tap before the death okay you would have killed me all right let's start again i mean what a nutty thing because you're catching this dude in chokes right catching this dude in triangles and rear naked chokes and shit like that you're essentially killing him i mean he had he's saying all right all right that would have been death yeah you know that's it you know what a weird thing to experience you experience that every day every day and it can be a last thing to experience. You experience that every day. Every day. And it can be a last-minute decision.

You might have a little bit of an injury. But, you know, I'm making my ear guards. I'm going to roll a little bit. Just going to go light. Just going to go light. And you just get out there, and you'll just practice killing people. Yeah, going light, you might kill someone. Yeah.

Once or twice. I'm such a retard. That's what fucked me up, man. I'm sitting here talking to you, ladies and gentlemen, and I have such a retard That's what fucked me up I'm sitting here talking to you ladies and gentlemen And I have such a pain in my back I hurt it so bad That I've got numbness at the tip of a couple of my fingers And it's because

I hurt my back doing Jiu Jitsu And I still rolled I just went back in And a bunch of dudes were yanking on my neck And it got way worse And then it got to the point where it's swelling, and it impedes on your nerves. It actually presses against your ulnar nerve, which is the one that goes down your elbow into the little. So my arm's feeling it.

We both got tweeted the exact same Black Keys tweet the other day. But mine came in a madly way, bro. I know, but we. How did your injury come again? Moving a mouse? Sleeping or crying, one of the two. No, but seriously. Yeah, then we both. How did your ear injury come again? Moving a mouse? Sleeping or crying, one of the two. No, but seriously.

Yeah, then we both. He went to Starbucks and got the Black Keys album. I was like, ah, is that Starbucks? Got the Black Keys album. And then I didn't see that. And literally almost 12 hours later, I did the exact same, almost word-to-word tweet that you did. Well, people accused me of being sponsored. They accused me of being sponsored by Starbucks.

You see, you're being sponsored by Starbucks or the Black Keys keys dude like not just one person and i was like oh wow like you guys think i would do that like that's so insincere like if i you know sell the on it stuff or i sell the fleshlight like it's 100 sincere i'll never fake sell you some shit and if someone's paying me to to you know to sell some shit it'll be just like i do the flashlight commercial it'll be very obvious this is what this is what i think about the product and i'll never try to sell anything that i don't that i don't believe in but but it wouldn't it's pretty amazing that starbucks has become my new music store i buy more music from starbucks now than any other place yeah well everything else i buy i buy on digital form i

buy on itunes it's for everything but yeah like an i haven't had a physical copy i didn't even know how my fucking cd player in my car worked i never i never used it you have to press a button to load it i've never done it i'm shoving it in there and fuck yeah i don't use it i use the ipod it's the shit man i was working a record store at 17 when CDs first got introduced. It was mostly vinyl. This is like a music plus was a big chain. And they had videos. What year is this?

1988. Who would have ever believed that they would become irrelevant? Yeah. That there's no need for music stores anymore. They don't exist anymore. No. Where the fuck? Have you ever been to one?

I don't know where to buy stickers or band t-shirts now either. It was on.com, bitch. I know, but there was more to just the music store. I liked going to the music store because they had everything. And then used CDs to me was so awesome back in the day. Just being able to pick up some shit you normally wouldn't buy because it was $2. Was it Virgin that had those stations? Yeah. Where you would go and they would show you the CD? I loved that. Yeah. They all did that.

But you would always have to wait for a fucking headphone because everybody would just be... They thought that was their edge. This is how we're gonna do it. Who's gonna fuck with us? There was another one. Boom.

They go under. There was one that did it where they had... It was later. I forget what the name of the music place was. But you sat down. It was in Studio City.

You sat down and they had a screen in front of you. And you could like toggle through things. It was like buttons. You could pick like what album you wanted and what song off what album and you could do it all like there were a whole library of what's available was like right in front of you. That was pretty good. But it was cool because you would like find out about guys, find out about people you never heard about. Like Ari tweeted some girl the other day I don't remember her name I wish I remember I'll

have to ask him I'll ask him during the podcast we'll get to the root of this he tweeted about some girl giving him a boner and then I went to the music and this chick had like 1 million 500,000 fucking hits on this song so it's obviously like a super famous song and And she's hot as fuck. And she's singing. It's really kind of hypnotic. I'm like, wow. I never even heard of this chick.

Like, how weird is this? Like, there's someone out there like that. How many goddamn artists are there? Dude, there's tons of artists. I'm a music fiend. And I can't keep up with the artists that they pump out every year. There's so many. Yeah, how many dudes have just struggled

to try to navigate the waters? That's the fucking crazy thing about the music business. There's a lot of shit you gotta go through to get a record on the radio. That seems to be all locked up, you know? And now it's different. Everybody's on iTunes up you know and now you know it's different everybody's on itunes you know and anybody can get on itunes that's the craziest thing is is like i was telling you yesterday just having my song on itunes along with coldplay and jay-z

it's like all right there in the same shit record labels are so useless now they really are what do they do now they get you on mtv i guess and and uh radio airplay is still huge too but you know it's we keep moving towards itunes and getting your own shit and people aren't it seems like the record labels are coming becoming more and more irrelevant well you know now that louis ck released his cd or his dvd rather on. Well, you know, now that Louis C.K. released his CD, or his DVD, rather, on the Internet directly, a lot of people are thinking that other comics are going to start doing the same, too. And I think I'm going to do it that way. I think if it's feasible, it's financially feasible,

I'm going to probably try to do it in Atlanta in April. That's what it looks like. You make all the money. Yeah. Well, not only that. Here's the most important thing. It just goes directly to your fans, and it's only five bucks.

All the stuff about getting it on TV and all the stuff about getting it through this channel and that channel and finding advertising for it and justifying the budget, all that stuff's gone now. You don't have to worry about that. You don't have to worry about anybody else's input, which I got to say, when I did my last one, the Spike TV people were fucking awesome. We had zero meetings about my material were fucking awesome we had zero meetings about my material zero we had zero meetings about what i was going to do they just let me go that that was the the most the talking monkeys in space one was the most open anybody had ever

given me spike was awesome and the ufc produced it and they were awesome it was so easy baby blow jobs that's that didn't make it right no i didn't i didn't like the way it came out i uh you know i edit my things down that's one that might not ever make it there's a few there's a few uh few killer bits throughout my history that somehow or another never never wound their way onto cds like um arnold the arnold bit hasn't been on one cd right no i don't think it's on anything no and i don't think um hugh hefner got in anything oh it did it got on that weird dvd that i made from texas that no one's ever seen so and that was a not that wasn't even a good version of hugh hefner that was like the early hugh what was that dv called dvd called

belly of the beast oh i remember that one that was an that one. Anna Nicole Smith made it on both of them. Damn, that's a good one. Belly of the Beast, that's a good deal. That's like early kiss. You know what I mean? That's like early kiss. Yeah, Kevin Booth produced that for me, and that was a huge honor for me, because he was like Bill Hicks' producer, he's Bill Hicks' buddy, and the fact that he wanted to

do my stuff, I was like, wow. But, you know, back then I really wasn't doing nearly as much comedy as I have been now. Was the tiger bit on Belly of the Beast? I think so. I think so, yeah. I had the tiger bit early. That will always be my favorite Joe Rogan bit. Well, that bit was

the only bit that in the history of my act where I had to change my act because of the bit twice. Once I had to change my act because of the bit because it was bombing so bad. I thought there was no there's nowhere that this was going to get good this bit is going to eat me it's going to i got to get rid of it it's it's fucking me up sometimes you commit to a good idea and then the good idea somewhere along the line of development process falls apart and then it's not funny anymore but you're still committing to it so you have to do this bit and

while you're doing this bit no one's laughing it's just weird and then somewhere along the line i realized that what i was doing was i was doing the bit was about these watching tigers fuck and that it makes you feel like so inadequate when you watch these wild predators and they're just just fucking on television there's no warning about it and i realized that the only way what i'm doing right now is I'm explaining how these tigers are fucking. And the people are not feeling it. They're not feeling it. What I got to do is be the tiger. You got to be that tiger.

You got to throw yourself into that thing where, well, he's fucking and he's just, you know. I forget the words of the bit, but, you know, the point of it was that it was so primal. You know, there was nothing no your tiger voice is amazing yeah yeah i just decided to be you you got to think like you're like an animal i mean i think it's look the the narrow perception of that animal it must be pretty fucking simple fuck kill sleep that's the menu was part of the bit and that's what i was thinking like when i was thinking if you're thinking like a tiger there's not a whole lot of variables going on they're not worried about politics and shit they got laser beam focus on fucking and killing you know and they're giant

you know you got to think like that way and then then the bit became so strong that i had to put it at the end because it was in the middle i put in the middle because it was dying you know i would do it and then it would eat a dick and then i would still have my good stuff to pull myself out and maybe I could joke around about how it was pretty funny to me when I was writing it. And then I'd pull myself out of it. But then it got to be a point where I couldn't leave it in the middle because it was just slaying.

Once I figured out how to be the tiger and I would do this violent fuck thing where throw the fucking stool down and roar. I can't do it. I can't make the noise. Oh, you can't make the noise. Come on. It won't sound right on these microphones. It'll blow it out too, right? No. I can't do it. I can't make the noise. Oh, you can't make the noise. Come on. It won't sound right on these microphones. It'll blow it out too, right? No. I think you

could do it. Meow. Meow. Meow. Pfft. Pfft. Pfft. You gotta do the bit. I can't. I don't even remember how to do it.

I would ruin it. I would ruin it. I don't know how to do it anymore. Come on. I don't even remember how to do it. Come on. I would ruin it. I would ruin it. I don't know how to do it anymore. It's the end of my first CD, I'm Going to Be Dead Someday. You know, male tigers, they fuck like eight times a day. How many times a day? Well, they can fuck, I don't know, dozens. They can fuck dozens of times a day. That's amazing.

Just a certain part of the year, right? Not like all year round, right? Yeah, when the female's in heat. There he goes, when the female's in heat. There he goes, when the female's in heat. Like, what's the commentary? I don't remember the bit. When the female's in heat. I gotta abandon my bits when I stop doing them and when I abandon them and I stop doing them. There's some of them

that I can never go back to. I've come back to some of them, but it was sketchy about how they really went. Noah's Ark. One time, yeah, I pulled Noah's Ark out because they keep yelling it out. And one time I pulled out Anna Nicole Smith but I think I left some chunks out. No, you did it for the most part. That was pretty good.

For the most part. But that's a timing bit. That's a bit where you've got to have perfect timing, so you've got to know exactly what the next word is. That, to me, was one of my favorite bits ever. I'm thinking about your tiger voice. Disney should use you for the fucking next Lion King 2 or something. You would make an excellent voiceover animal guy.

But you just got to think that you're the animal. Remember the wolf you did? Like the on the phone, the wolf on the phone? We did this thing. Yeah, we did this thing once on Fear Factor recently. We blindfolded contestants and we walked them into this room because we have to like measure with the cameras the cameras have to block where everybody is so they move them slowly in place while blindfolded so while these people are blindfolded I'm going they record it why they should play that I got people

freaking out man can you get that I get it? I got people freaking out man Can you get that footage? I can sound like a fucking dog Like a wolf A wolf breathing Would you get that footage? That's amazing Do the breathing

Like the growling wolf You sound like a Tyrannosaurus Rex Dude you sound like a tyrannosaurus rex dude someone has got to use you in some fucking animation man you got some crazy voices and nobody does joey diaz it's i can just i can go deep and and find the root i can find the root of that noise the the animal noises you just gotta that's the key to it you gotta be that animal joey diaz uh doing hosting fear factor how would he host fear factor we've done this a million The animal noises. You just got to, that's the key to it. You got to be that animal. Joey Diaz hosting Fear Factor. How would he host Fear Factor? We've done this a million times.

Oh, on the show? On the podcast? No, you and me. That's what I'm saying. That's hilarious. You six cocksuckers have been brought here from all over the country for one reason. Stare fear in the eyes. You compete for $50,000, whatever, whatever.

You know this shit, bitch. While you're busting my balls. Could you imagine watching Joey host a straight show like that? That would be awesome. Him not giving a fuck. You know, the unfortunate thing is you would never get the real Joey. You can never put Joey on a traditional network show and get the real essence of who Joey is.

You got to just let him go. It's got to be like this. You got to let him. If you put him in that little Return of the Death Knuckle movie we did. We just gave. All that shit was all Joey. We just gave him a situation. We're like, we're two cops.

We're going to walk up to you and you're talking about Bruce Lee. And all that shit he came up with. And that's how you get the best Joey Diaz. Let him write his own shit. And for people who don't know that, that's a funny fucking movie, man. What was that? What inspired that? And say, how do people see it?

Return of Death Knuckle? Return of the Death Knuckle. Return of the Death Knuckle. It's like a rush hour spoof. It's ridiculous. It's very silly. It's very silly, but it was fun, man. It was a fun, well-made, fun little movie.

Cristo Garcia was the producer, director. He put it all together. And me, Renato, and Cristo, we producer director. He put it all together. And me, um, Hanato and Cristo, we all wrote it and put it together. Originally it was going to be the Joey karate story, but Joey couldn't do it.

Then we, we made, uh, Hanato the lead villain. Then Joey came back and did a little cameo anyway. So the fucking Joe Diaz speech of Jet Li over Bruce Lee, you know, he's like, what the fuck is this Jet Li yeah

that was that's an all-time classic that was really Joey right that was Joey talking that's the best you can't write for Joey anybody trying to write for Joey you know you're not gonna get the best Joey let him be himself give him a situation let him ad-lib there's no way you're gonna write something funnier than Joey yeah Yeah. Being himself, it's impossible. You got to write material, though, when you do Joey impressions. You got to keep material coming. You can always have new things to say. Oh, man.

Joey Diaz is one of those dudes where you just go, what pieces have to fall in place perfectly to create that guy? You know? To create such a jovial, fun dude to be around with the wildest fucking stories but made it through alive and he's a sweetheart of a guy with like nine cats well you think he has like 11 now doesn't he like 11 yeah 11 that's ridiculous but he's just he's a sweetheart of a guy the funniest thing he did in return of the death knuckles at the very end outtakes we you

know we filmed that shit guerrilla style and this this uh black bum like he's like a crackhead insane dude passes by you know people thought that was an actor like that was not an act it was just perfect and Joey just vibed with them and a lot of people most people probably say that's the funniest part of the whole movie he just killed it at the very end. Outtakes. Joey Diaz is an all-time classic. One of the beautiful things about this podcast is exposing people to all these guys like Joey and Burt Kreischer and Duncan and you and Ari and Brian Callen, for sure. There's no other resource that we've ever had like this.

We could provide some entertaining thing for free for people. Yeah, it's all free. Yeah, and then they get to see all these crazy motherfuckers and peer into that world. You don't realize, man, how many people just have no cool, fun shit around them. They're not experiencing a cool, fun life. And they hear someone live in a cool, fun life, and it's inspiring. It feels good. It feels like they can figure out a way. There's got to be a way to tune into that frequency too.

I hear it. I hear the frequency. And now with Twitter, we're able to all work together now. Because what Twitter is kind of turning into for me, and I know it is for you because we get tagged in the same shit is like people people are sending us different videos different news articles like a crazy shit and if we pick which ones to retweet to all our fans so it's like it's like they're actually helping us out like I want people to keep sending me crazy shit that's I learn more shit through Twitter people sending me shit on Twitter than anywhere else it's it's amazing yeah no doubt yeah i think it's the best resource i've ever had ever

they always send us they always tag us in the same shit it's like conspiracy yeah conspiracy yeah crop circles crop circles aliens chemtrails people send me chemtrails shit all the time i'm only going to retweet the the real good ones some of you guys are sending shit like one line in the sky That's good. So send me the good shit. We're like I want to see at least five lines by the line. Come on Well chemtrail over Stockholm. It's one fucking line. What am I gonna do with that? Come on man. Don't send me one line I watch a lot of those crop circle documentaries. That is one of the biggest mysteries to me. That is fascinating.

Crazy shit. Because for the most part, I think there's a lot of them that people have created, obviously. There's a lot of artists, and it's kind of cool that they're doing that. They're making these weird patterns. But then there's some that almost defy explanation. And when I mean almost defy explanation explanation i mean a person could have done it but man if they really did do it first of all fucking bravo because you've created one of the best works of geometric art available on the planet and you've done it somehow or another

on this giant field of corn or wheat or whatever the fuck it is by pressing things down there's some of them that are amazing they're just just, if it is just a person, if it is just a person, then it's a stellar work of art. I mean, if it is just a person doing it or a group of people, but if it's something else, if it's some sort of technology or something that's creating some of these patterns, because I know that there's, I don't know how much of this is woo-woo bullshit

because these guys that are into it have so much invested in it you know when you uh when you hear about someone like that's like a circle uh studier or a circle expert they've been studying circles their whole life and they've been you know finding out all the different various anomalies that happen inside of the circles and look there's a different radioactive reading apparently that's horseshit A lot of that. Apparently, the radioactive reading, like, for some reason, like, plants give out radiation. Like, all sorts of different things give out radiation. They give out a certain frequency of radiation.

And apparently, that changes when things are squashed and smashed, which totally makes sense. Yeah, that's an awesome one. But, you know, that could have been done, right? That could have been done by a person. Yeah, that looks easily like a person I told amazing you think they're all Brian. I don't think they all I don't think they all but they I would say the majority That are yes. Look at this. Look at this fucking thing Look at this largest crop circle ever it measures

1738 feet by 470 something feet. That's almost twice the length of the Titanic. Jesus Christ. Holy shit. For a man to create this colossal-sized crop circle, I'm guessing it would take a 100-man team weeks to plan and weeks to complete. Or 10 guys with a tractor. The Firefox man with a crop circle was 220 feet diameter. It took under two weeks to plan.

It was completed in two days by 12 students at Oregon State. See? So look, they created this one, and that's a pretty beautiful one. But it's not the same. It's not that great. It's not that great. Look at this. The crop circle you're about to see was made in approximately seven minutes.

It was 1,033 feet long and 500 feet wide, and it was made in seven minutes. Hit that guy's volume. Scandies Field, and the field next to it was the Rape, and the wheat field next to that by Golden Ball Field. Hit that guy's volume. What's with this gay music? This is not the same thing. There's two musics playing on. This is a... Hit pause on him. That's his music?

Who the fuck engineered this piece of shit? People that want you to believe that crop circles are real. Yeah, is this like mystical music? To make me think you're serious? We talked about that for a few minutes and wondered if there was something in it. I felt that maybe there's a connection, but we didn't know anything at that point. And it was around that time that Wynne realized he had to go and change his tapes over because they run for four hours in the vehicle.

So he went down to the vehicle and changed the tapes and came back up. We sat there for about another 20 minutes, and just as some of the light began to creep in from the east, could see a very very power imperceptible shadow on the field so i asked wind to look through his light that guy doesn't sound sincere to me no it doesn't sound sincere to me at all it sounds like he's telling a story yeah he doesn't sound like a guy who has any emotional investment in this story. Oh, wait, you know what, man? I've heard this is a hoax.

There's a video of a crop circle being created. I've heard this is a hoax. Look at that. Holy shit. This is the formation that was made in that field that night. My God, look at that thing. It's a bunch of circles. That's an easy one. Yeah, that totally looks like man-made.

It's still amazing. Look at that. 160 circles over two acres. Joe, Burning Man's only once a year. All these guys have to do something all the other days, all right? Is that what it is? That's totally what it is. Well, this is one of the ones that I would say is unquestionably a, I mean, I would say, yeah.

Yeah, it's a bunch of circles. I would say if I had a bet, I would say, yeah, people made this. There's a difference between the ones that are just a bunch of circles that are, you know, you just make a bunch of circles a different size. And then there's some that aren't circles. There are some crazy ass circles. See if you can pull up some photos of, you know, crop circles, some really crazy ones. There's a documentary that you and I watched.

Do you remember it? Something about, it was a crop circle documentary. I've watched quite a few. Yeah. I don't remember their names. I don't remember their names. It's such a waste of time. You know, it's such a funny thing to like to trip on, you know, me.

But the people that are into them, man a man god they're into them they're into them like a religion there's some that are not explainable man there's some that are how the fuck you can't even draw this shit you're gonna have people out there stomping on cornfield well the other thing is that some of them the growth nodes that things have exploded that instead of being bent and snapped over what they had had actually done is they had been exploded like some sort of an energy, like a microwave energy. It caused them to expand and pop like they boiled and popped. I don't know if that's true, though.

The problem is I don't know if there's been any real widespread accredited, you know, know studies you know something somewhere where someone who is an expert in the field expert in radiation expert in plants I don't know I don't know how many studies have really been done on the crop circles so I'm talking on my ass but look at that thing god damn I think it would be hilarious if they were made by aliens, though. If that's what aliens decided to do. Just to fuck with us. Let's just make designs in their food.

You know, this is the first contact. Well, how long should we do it for? Do it for decades. Do it and do it on such a grand scale that at a certain point in time, they have to kind of admit that there's no way a person could have done it you know look at that right yeah okay that's a perfect example come on that was oh my god back back that went up a little bit brian jesus christ jesus christ we're looking at this incredible pattern and it has so many pieces to it it's this really amazing huge geometric pattern and it's so intricate and all the lines are like perfectly placed like look at it oh it's incredible

math hippies yeah for sure i mean if if someone did this they would have to be like a serious uh expert in geometry they have to be in a serious expert in geometry. They would have to be a fucking badass. That's awesome too. That's beautiful. I mean, some of them... That one, you know, that could be made. That's an incredible... That's our solar system minus the Earth.

We got nothing. That's kind of boring. That's amazing. That's dope. That's dope. That's pretty dope. I mean, there's some really cool art that they create out there. If it really is just people doing it, it's fucking awesome. But it would be really weird if it was a technology.

Imagine if this was some satellite shit they figured out how to do a long time ago. Yeah. They blast it from space. Yeah. And it just puts this signal onto the ground. And they figured out a long time ago that they can do this in fields. Yeah, definitely. You know what's fucked up, though, dude?

There's evidence that this shit had happened long, long, long before there was even cameras. In fact, there's a newspaper article from, I think, the 1600s. Look at that. That show a devil with a sickle making a crop circle. So before the internet, a lot of people are probably really bored, you know, and they just had farms everywhere and they're like, hey, let's just make some designs in the corn, you know. Could be.

Yeah, it could be. Or could be aliens make designs in food. Could you imagine going back to like stupid when people were riding on horses and shit and you were on a hill and you looked down into this field and you saw this intense geometric pattern like that carved into the field? Could you imagine it was back in the old days before computers and you saw something like that one,

that crazy starburst thing? You'd be like, what? You wouldn't even know what the fuck that was, man. You would assume that it would be some sort of witchcraft. Yeah. They have a picture of the devil, and the devil's got a sickle, and he's moving through the field, pressing down shit. I mean, what was that?

You think that was just kids flattening corn out back then? It was probably bored people. I mean, they had to do something. What if there's some nutty, like, natural phenomenon, and we don't know what it is, but it creates geometric patterns in plants. Just, like, blast them out. It only takes, like, a second.

But it only happens rarely, so they can't measure it. They don't know what the fuck it is. But it doesn't fuck anything else up. But if it lands on a street nothing happens it's just no pattern but if it lands on a field brian turn your gay phone ringing off it's the clock your fucking clock meows at the time oh my god what is wrong with you i somebody sent this to me throw it in the garbage How dare you You're a grown man, Brian

That is not doing wonders for your testosterone I guarantee you Your balls shrink a little bit Every time that cat meows You realize that's your fucking clog Oh hey Joe I'm nominated for a producer Of this podcast and another podcast

By the Shorty Awards What by the Shorty Awards. What's the Shorty Awards? I don't know. I have no idea. But I guess it's pretty big because, like, if you go to their website, like, Conan got one and, like, a bunch of, like, legit people, you know, like, received them and actually went to the thing. So are you campaigning for this? Is that what's going on?

I've never actually tried, but I'm like, hey, this will get me a Wikipedia page. Will it really? Yeah. You're upset at this Wikipedia thing. How come you can't get a Wikipedia page? I'm not important enough. I got to win a Shorty Award. Is that what it is?

Wait a minute. Can't anybody just put up a Wikipedia page? No, it gets taken down if people don't find it's important enough. Really? People, not me, but people have put up Wikipedia pages for me in proper format, and they just get taken down to me at like, they're like, who cares?

You know, that's hard. You're, you're kind of censored. And so if you, if you vote for me for the shorty word, just go to death squad dot TV. You're really obsessed with Wikipedia,

aren't you? And just vote. It seems like somebody at Wikipedia doesn't like you, Brian. That'll happen soon. Is that what's going on? You got like 40,000 followers or something, right?

I don't know. What's going on, Brian? Well, who did you, what did you do to somebody at Wikipedia? I did,000 followers or something, right? I don't know. What's going on, Brian? What did you do to somebody at Wikipedia? I did nothing. You did something to piss them off. I just didn't do enough. I think they listened to this fucking podcast.

That's what's going on. You got a hater. You think it's a hater at Wikipedia? No, I just think they're right. I think they are very censored. Like, it's not Wikipedia you think is an open thing that anyone can get on there, but honestly, unless you don't have articles written about you, you don't have shorty awards, you don't have any of that stuff. Shorty awards?

You just decided that that's going to be your salvation. Shorty award is going to be in. So, Joe, if you want to help me get a shorty award. Okay, Brian, if you really want a shorty award. Oh, Eddie Bravo's got to get out of here. So, let's just wrap this bitch up. All right. Bravo's got to get out of here.

So let's just wrap this bitch up. All right. If you are interested in learning the manly art of jujitsu and learning some character and some discipline and learning a martial arts, OK, become a fucking real man. Step up. Only takes about a year to two to become an expert at putting people to sleep. It doesn't take that long. And anybody can do it. Women do it.

Children do it. You put in a year. It's your half. You'll get in great shape and you'll learn how to subdue someone in case anything happens like someone threatens your family or whatever um your kids you'll have the ability within a year or two to subdue someone and put them out control them or put them to sleep you don't hurt them it's gentle and you know you avoid nasty situations punch them in their fucking face and i could teach you how to poison somebody in five minutes you have to teach them a lesson brian let's show you how to shoot you with a dart yeah like a native um go to uh

10thplanetjiujitsu.com 10thplanetjj yeah 10thplanetjj.com the main school is in hollywood we're there all the time as soon as i'm up, as soon as my fingers aren't numb. I don't think that's a good thing. I got 30 schools worldwide, including Melbourne, even Korea, Germany, a bunch in the United States, a couple in Canada. But Eddie's teaching in Hollywood all the time. He's always there. If you're ever in town, you could always fly in town, learn some lessons, too. A lot of dudes do that.

They come in from all over the world. We got friends that come in from Australia. We got friends that come in from Australia. We got friends who come in from Japan. We got friends who come in all the time to come to the headquarters. And if you're not near any 10th Planet Jiu-Jitsu school, just go to your local BJJ school. It doesn't matter. And if you want to learn some 10th Planet specific techniques, on my website I put up every technique I teach at my home school.

I videotape every single technique, put it up on my website, I put up every technique I teach at my home school. I videotape every single technique, put it up on my website, and for $4.99 a month, you have complete access to the 10-point system. So all the lessons. So even if you don't have a jiu-jitsu school in your area, you just get you and your brother, a couple friends, put some mats in the garage. The stuff that's online, can they download it to their phone or anything like that?

Not yet. But you can watch it on your phone. You can watch it on your phone. Yeah, you can watch everything. Streams on your phone. All the techniques I teach. Does it work on an iPhone? Does it work on everything?

It works on an iPhone. Yep, yep. iPhone, but you know. So it's like HTML5, right? Is that what it is? Because iPhones still can't do those. They can't do the flash format. I don't know what the technical format is.

I'm not a computer geek. I'm not a computer geek, but it does work. You can watch my techniques from an iPhone. Beautiful. Beautiful. And there's a discount offer if people mention the podcast. You mention the podcast, you sign a six-month contract, you get the first two months free.

How do you beat that? Can't beat that, bitches. Can't beat that. And that's for headquarters in Hollywood. Yes. We're on Santa Monica Boulevard, and I should be back in about two weeks, hopefully. Hopefully two weeks of resting. This thing will be healed up.

Do you have one in Columbus, Ohio? No. Nothing in Ohio yet. No, but I know there's a Hellsing Gracie joint in Ohio. Yeah. Tony's era. Find any school in town you know what i mean it's like it doesn't all you know as long as there's a dude in there that's at least a purple belt you know what i mean this is just fun to learn it's like it's one of the the best ways to exert energy and you you come out of it completely relaxed you get rid of all

your monkey aggression yep it's good for you and I hear over and over again from emails and Twitter, all these people that have started jiu-jitsu since they listened to the podcast, people that started eating healthy. I mean, I hear all these success stories. It's really kind of crazy. I didn't start out to be a motivational speaker, but if you guys get motivated by anything that happens on the podcast, it's just even better.

But it's the coolest thing to hear. I've had so many tweets from people that said they in the past six months there's a whole uh page um a thread rather on my message board that's dedicated to people having their lives changed by the podcast and it's pretty fucking humbling and i i just want everybody to know that i it's not anything that i planned in any way shape or form but um i'm honored and i i i don't take it lightly at all and. I find it a huge honor, but I also treat it as a serious responsibility. I think that when you have a bunch of people listening to you, you have to be 100% legit and 100% honest and as pure with your thoughts and intentions as you can.

So I try to keep it real as much as possible. So when I hear something like that and people tell me that, you know, hey, you know, since I listen to your podcast, now I started to do jujitsu. I started taking care of myself and I'm eating healthy. I'm drinking kale shakes. I lost 20 pounds. I feel great. I fucking love that.

I hear that all the time, too, man. From the podcast. From the podcast. It's beautiful. So many guys. Anybody could do jujitsu. Yeah. Anybody can get in shape, man.

Anybody. You can take care of your body. Anybody can be healthy. You can be. Anybody can get in shape, man. You can take care of your body. Anybody can be healthy. You can be healthier. And healthier works better, man. Your mind works better. You feel better. You feel freer.

You don't feel burdened by the shitty feeling of being out of shape, the shitty feeling of having bad foods in your system. Taking care of yourself, taking supplements, like AlphaBrain from Onnit.com. That's O-N-N-I-T. Just wrap this bitch up. Eddie's gotta get out of here. Love you bitches. Anyway. Thank you to the

Fleshlight for sponsoring the show. Oh, August excuse me. August? August. Damn, boy. I'm not even planning in advance. I'm trying to get this shit out quick and I'm stumbling. January 27th, Chicago Theater. Duncan Trussell, Joey Diaz, and me. It's selling out fast. We still have

we opened up the tops. We opened up the bottom is completely sold out and there's a top balcony and there's some tickets still available. They're going quick. We're going to have a fucking blast. I can't wait to do that. We also have some posters that were commissioned by Mike Maxwell. He made some posters

for the thing. We're going to work that out too. And so we should be selling his artwork at the Chicago Theater. He made something specifically for that show. And it's pretty cool. It's a poster of me and Duncan and Joey. And I'll put that up on Twitter with his permission once we have solidified our arrangement. And so the Chicago Theater, that is January 27th. And there's some tickets still available, but they are going fast.

So if you want in, jump on it, bitches. We're going to have a fucking good time. It's exactly where the weigh-ins are too, which is awesome, because I'm there for the UFC as well, so I'm going to emcee the weigh-ins, and then we're just going to fucking hang out right there. That's where the show is that night. Thank you to The Fleshlight. If you are interested in masturbating with a device that feels better than your hand,

then I suggest you investigate the Fleshlight. It's a top quality device, and Brian and I both give it two thumbs up. Yeah. Go to JoeRogan.net, click on the link for the Fleshlight, enter in the code name Rogan, and you will save 15% off the number one sex toy for men. And also, thank you to Onnit.com, makers of Alpha Brain, Alpha Brain Source, which will soon be available in all these countries where you're being oppressed by the man. And they also make Shroom Tech Sport, Shroom Tech Immune,

two different mushroom supplements that I enjoy, the Shroom Tech Sport being for athletics and the Immune being a complicated mushroom symbiosis with your body and your immune system, then you need to go to onnit.com, O-N-N-I-T, for all the juicy details. And as always, from onnit.com, if you don't like it, it's free, okay?

When you order something, you will get a 100% money-back guarantee if you are not satisfied with the product. If you think the product is too expensive, I urge you to go online and copy our recipe. Copy the exact ingredients, buy the stuff in bulk, and make it your own and save yourself some money. I swear, I am much more concerned with people not feeling ripped off. I already said this once today, so I won't say it again. So thanks for everything.

Our intentions are pure. We're moving in the right direction. 2012, bitches. The Mayan calendar's coming to an end. And we're going to be okay. I think we're going to be fine. We're going to have some fun. I'll see you freaks later.

Bye. Thank you. Bye. Bye. Bye.