The Joe Rogan Experience - #1966 - Big Jay Oakerson & Ari Shaffir

Episode Date: April 5, 2023

Big Jay Oakerson is a stand-up comic, on-air personality, and podcaster. He's a host of "The Legion of Skanks", "SDR Show", and "The Bonfire" podcasts, and has a new comedy special, "Dog Belly", premiering April 5 on YouTube. www.bigjaycomedy.com Ari Shaffir is a stand-up comic and the host of "The Skeptic Tank" and "You Be Trippin'" podcasts. His latest special, "Ari Shaffir: Jew," is available now via YouTube.www.arishaffir.com

The Joe Rogan Experience. Train by day, Joe Rogan podcast by night, all day. And we're up. Yeah, the NXIVM cult is the one that I still haven't watched that documentary. I've been watching this doc, I've got a bit about the place that I used, that I bought before I bought the mothership. Yeah. Because it's about a place that was owned by a cult. So I've been watching the documentary on the cult.

It's called Holy hell. It's so fucking crazy. I've been watching it. I've watched it three or four times to try to like find the angles for the bit because the guy who ran it was a gay porn star who was also a hypnotist. It's such a powerful combination. All you wore was Speedos and eyeliner. And this, this dude ran this cult for 20 fucking years.

And they kicked him out and sent him to Hawaii. And now he's running in Hawaii. At the end of the documentary, the guy goes to visit the guy in Hawaii. Now he's old and fucked up looking. He's had a bunch of plastic surgery, like fake cheeks and his lips are done and everything. He looks like a monster. And he's still got these people following around and open the doors for him,

and he sits down and he talks like a guru. Complete con artist. Did they show you his porns? Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. How was he? Oh, yeah, they just block out where the dick is going in the ass. He's pounding this guy from behind,

and then he's doing like a push-up. He's doing like a plank, and this guy is underneath him, and he's holding on to the guy's the guy's holding on to his hips and he's just mouth-fucking this guy. Nice. While his legs are completely suspended in the air.

Oh, he's just, okay, doing workouts. Yeah, he's basically doing a workout. So he's got like in a push-up position like this and his leg is both of his legs are up there like that pointed and he's going like this and just humping this guy's mouth. I mean, the humping this guy's mouth. I mean, this is something that the cult members had found out while he was, you know, that's him. But see, when he got older, he started looking creepy.

You've got to realize this guy started this cult in 1981. He was an extra in Rosemary's Baby. Really? Yeah, that was like his claim to fame. He was just a bad actor. He's got some young bucks with him. Oh, he had all young bucks and young beautiful women too.

Like that's how he attracted the heterosexual men. He had a bunch of young beautiful women but he told them never to have relationships together and then he fucked

all the guys. The move with the NXIVM guy you can get a really good cult going but you're everyone's not going to get the

even Charles Manson they always made it out to these young pretty hippie girls. When you see the pictures can get a really good cult going but you're everyone's not going to get the well even charles manson they always made it out to these these young pretty hippie girls when you see the pictures they're all pretty rough the manson yeah and then the the nexium cult it's the same thing it's like they tell you all the people that were involved and like except for like one girl like most of them were pretty like homely so you're like, yeah, I guess if your cult leader status is to bang a bunch of their okays. Well, this is like headshots after they've left the cult and realized it was over. That girl's the actress.

She's the actress? The bottom left one? Yeah. She's the prettiest. I recognize her. But she's like secretary. Yes. She was like, yes, exactly.

I think she got out of fucking him because she would recruit the girls and brand them. That girl's pretty. That girl's pretty. That's whatchamacallit's daughter. Who? She got involved too. She's not bad. Oh, she's an actress.

She was an actress in those old Falcon Crest type shows. Falcon Crest. Oh, my God. Yeah, like those. Could you imagine being trapped on one of those shows where you got to get a paycheck every week and the paycheck is Wonderful. Oh, I'm gonna say the light making like a hundred grand a week So it's like a burkett for oxenberg's dog. So you're not gonna leave you're not gonna leave but you're like this sucks

I didn't get acting to do this. Yeah, but is it a good career if you're like take a Lorenzo Lamas? Mm-hmm The guy is like, you know small parts in Greece and stuff then he's on Falcon Crest as a heartthrob for a while, which is, I think, network. That's a big network. Then he's renegade for years, probably his most successful thing. Yeah, that was like a syndicated show. Yeah, that was a syndicated show. Beautiful man.

Oh, he was gorgeous in his day. Beautiful man. Yeah. Yeah. Like, what does he look like now? That's him up there. Not bad. Not bad. Still slinging dicks. day beautiful man. Yeah. Yeah, like what does he look like now? That's him up there 63 but major like a younger woman who goes by nerdy blonde on okay? Oh, that's new he already had like a like a big girl like a lady leave him there

He's with for a while. He's with a playboy girl or so. Oh, yeah. Yeah I remember seeing that like she had a ton of plastic surgery and shit, right? Yeah. Lorenzo Lamas. Do you think he ever, if he looked back at himself at 16, 17, 18, whatever,

when he's looking forward, if he's like, that's my career, do you think he'd be happy with that or go, nah, I want something legit? It would really depend on how smart he is.

I've never heard him talk. Or what he did with his money, I guess. Right. But also, how smart is he? Are you stimulated there? Are you just happy to get attention? I bet did with his money, I guess. Right. But also, like, how smart is he? Like, are you stimulated there? Are you just happy to get attention? I bet he's just happy to get attention.

Maybe. Yeah. I think he was more pretty than brilliant. Yeah. Maybe. But, you know, saying with the NXIVM guy and, like, the intelligence of them, it's weird, like, because the different states in life, like, that guy made himself, like, very wealthy in that cult, the NXIVM guy. Oh, he made himself wealthy by... uh in that cult the nexium guy oh he

made himself wealthy by sure yeah because it's a ponzi scheme on top of the sex thing it was most first of all it was a money thing first and foremost it was sex was bonus it was one of those schemes to do like um you know they'd be like put uh like get five more people to join and oh pyramid scheme pyramid scheme for sureramid scheme, for sure. And then once they were in and believed their life was getting better from that, he'd be like, hey, girls, there's a little side project I got going on called, like, you know,

fuck me when I tell you to. Oh, interesting. But weren't they, like, getting branded or something? Yeah, that's what I'm saying. It gets greedy. Those things always go down because you... The guy has too much power and he keeps going over it Well, it's not enough to be like hey. I'm fucking three chicks. There's need this is great

Negan in the Walking Dead you can fuck three chicks and instill you want to bank the guy who worships you his wife I want to see if you can get his wife too, and it's crazy Yeah, and they always wind up doing it too. They get it. I have to comply They don't know what to do like David Koresh, he had a deal where he could fuck everyone's wife. The people that get out of it, like, sitting there and, like, just seeing a guy. Just seeing a guy. I don't know how they stay together. Like, a guy and his wife sitting on a couch while the guy's hysterically crying.

Like, I can't believe I sat in that room and waited for him to fuck you while I, you know. I can believe it. That they stay together? Yeah. Yeah. I can believe guys like that. There's guys like that out there. They're like know. I can believe it. That they stay together? Yeah. Yeah. I can believe guys like, there's guys like that out there. They're like,

the girl can do anything. She can shit in his face. No, but they're all like, oh, well, don't do that. I don't do that to you. There's certain people. And they have to complain about it the whole time.

Yeah, there's always been humans like that. There's like a spectrum of humans. There's always been humans that you could just kind of like push around and do anything to. Yeah. Well, the other one i just watched i said because this guy had no status in life it was an older guy who moved into his like his i think it was his

daughter his daughter would always talk about how great her dad was and he was super involved in like seal team shit and uh with gorbachev and all these like past political dealings. But he's in jail now because the government railroaded him. This is what she would tell all of her dorm mates where, you know, housemates in college. But he rules. He's the best. He comes out of jail and she's like, can he come live here with us for a while? And then over the course of the next few years, like he just turns his daughter's house of

friends into a sex cult with each other. It's wild. Yeah. I heard about that one, too Wow Yeah, well there's a lot of con men out there also what we're talking about before the podcast Yeah, there's a lot of con men out there and con women. There's a lot of con artists Do they con themselves or they think some part of them is doing a good thing? No, like the NXIVM guys like I am teaching them like life skills and building them up. Yeah, I bet they lie to themselves. I bet they say, yeah.

There's a little bit of that in there. Like with this guy, what's fascinating about this holy hell thing, in the beginning, the cult was amazing. Like it just, as it got older, the guy started fucking everybody. Started fucking all the men. That's one of the things that he did as he got older.

Like heterosexual men started fucking them and hypnotizing them. And then on top of that, he started telling people to get plastic surgery So he could see what it looked like like he wanted to get like his cheeks done So he had his followers get the cheeks done what happened with him is he was beautiful when he was young Yeah, that's the guy who made the documentary. That's will Allen. He's the guy made it Oh, but if he got you also was a lot all the people were good-looking

Apparently put his ass on the line. The picture of him like up there with his arms up in the air and everyone's got their hands up, that's him older, but still like ripped

and jacked. But when he was young in the beginning of the documentary, he was a beautiful man. He had like perfect features and this amazing body and he was a ballet dancer

and he put on this fake accent. What accent? Like he was, like he was a guru. Like and he put on this fake accent. What accent? Like he was a guru. Like, I am here to tell you, you are just life. Life is beautiful. You know, that kind of shit.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know, I'm sure the guy, I mean, he's a fucking actor, right? Do you think right away he knows I can never get you to get out, you're not gonna be part of my cult? 100%. He just gets the weakest people.

Yeah, if you stumbled in there first of all. Yeah, oh, they'd take me. He'd be like, you're not our type. No. You gotta be good looking. I'll prove it. You're not that good looking. Yeah. Oh, they'd take me. He'd be like, you're not our type. No. You gotta be good looking. I'll prove it. You're not that good looking. I love you, Jeff.

Take Studio 54. You're not the best looking guy. That's a good point. On Gay Island, I would have trouble there. There would be a problem. Yeah. And then guys like you or I or any of us, we'd be like, what are you doing? Wait a minute.

Yeah. Come on. What's going on there? How do you guys make money? Who's making money? Where's the money going? Yeah, that's what I mean. Yeah. You have a question early on. What's going on? How do you guys make money? Who's making money? Where's the money? I mean, yeah Yeah, you have a question early on their talent is finding people who are lost and don't ask questions exactly We're like I'm sure it's the idea of like when you tell me hear those things like where's the point where you have to go?

Hey, wait, wait. Yeah, wait, I don't that doesn't make sense. They all come from yoga classes Mm-hmm. I know his guys his people he would teach yoga classes in LA and that's how you'd find out You know you if you go to yoga. Yeah, I mean there's a lot of people in yoga There's a spectrum, but there's a certain percentage of guaranteed lost people in yoga classes There's a cross that too. We're also a CrossFit like how much they and another thing That's why it's you too. It wasn't like buying into the they said before I took CrossFit. They were like, you know, some people, ah, it's cultish, dude, it's weird. And I go, I don't even know what that means. I walk in and I do the thing that's on the board that says to do.

At the time, I can do it. And then I go home. But I then did realize, after being there for like a year, I'm like, these guys are having barbecues every weekend. Oh, yeah. And so they really do. They start hanging. And then people, the owner of the CrossFit gym, like there was two guys who owned it, both married guys.

I think both of them started fucking girls in the class. At least one of them did for sure. And the family broke up. And he was very publicly with this much younger girl from class. It was wild. There's going to be a segment of the class that wants the approval of the teacher. Oh, yeah. Like real bad.

This guy, they would call him the teacher. Wow. He had all these different, well, here's the thing. His name was Jaime Gomez. So he had to change it right away. You can't fly with that. Jaime Gomez fixes Toyotas. Yeah.

Jaime Gomez is on the Canelo Alvarez undercard. He doesn't bring you the answers from the universe. That's him when he was already older and looking creepy. Jaime Gomez is on the Canelo Alvarez undercard. He doesn't bring you the answers from the universe. That's him when he was already older and looking creepy. If you go to his name, Jaime Gomez, Rosemary's baby. I think he called himself Michelle back then. He changed his name three times. Four times.

Okay, so he changes his name. That's him right there. Look at that. Which beautiful man. The guy with the white. That's him right there. Like, look at that. Oh, yeah. Like, beautiful man. The one in the white. The guy with the white. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's him and Rosemary's baby. Yeah.

So, you know, so hypnotic, right? Just something about people with beautiful features. They can talk more people into things, right? Perfect skin, right? So this guy is ripped. He's walking around in a Speedo. And he's saying all these things that in the beginning make everybody happy. And he does this thing where he puts them in a med everybody happy and he does this this thing where

he puts them in a meditative state and he touches their forehead he tells them that when he touches their forehead they're going to experience orgasms and feel the universe and these people have they they're legitimately tripping balls because it's the power of suggestion and hypnosis hypnosis so he's hypnotizing these people and then he's putting it like in the beginning of the call it's amazing like no one seems to have a like in the beginning of the cult, it's amazing. Like no one seems to have a problem in the beginning. That's the thing about these things. When you watch the beginning of Wild Wild Country, same shit.

The beginning looks amazing. That's it. I want to join. That's my friend Todd. Todd said that to me. He goes, dude, I want to shut it off after episode one. Season two. That's great.

Let's get out there. He's like, I want to go find them. I want to join. It looks like they're having a good time. Because most people live these fucking miserable lives doing a job they don't like to do. And if someone will tell you, like, you've got a community. We eat together. We pray together.

They all meditate together. They all splash around the water. It looks like they're having a great fucking time. Yeah. But as the guy gets older, he gets creepier. And the cult awareness network goes after him. So he has to leave L.A. in the middle of the night. And he moves to Texas.

And so he sets up shop in Texas. How are they not going to find him in Texas? Change his name again. This is the 90s. Pre-internet. Pre-internet. 90s, bro. This is the 90s, right?

He starts the cult in, like, 81. So in the early 90s, there's these weirdos splashing around in Barton Springs holding hands with this guy who wears Speedos and an eyeliner. Like, what the fuck? And that's where they got him? So he changes his name from Michelle to Andreas. And so Andreas, now he's getting older. He starts getting weird.

And one of the things he starts doing is fucking with his face. He starts like shoving cheek things in and pulling things back and lips. He looks fucking weird. And he just, he's hanging on to like his good looks. And it throws them off because it doesn't fly with his message. Your body is a vessel. Your body is just a vessel. I know you're getting cut up.

You are God. We are all God. But now all of a sudden he's like getting facial surgery. vessel your body is cut up. You are God. We are all God You know it's like and then all of a sudden. He's like getting facial surgery like huh, and then a guy He was more gay than leader Well I gotta get the face More gay than guru he had to get the face done. Yeah, it's a fascinating documentary man But I love all those things. I love when you watch one of these things.

That one, the dude who fucked the whole family in Utah. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. That was great. But you're watching, you're just like, how do I not know about this? Dude, I think there's certain people that, I mean, I think this is why cults work. I think this is why some people become religious zealots and suicide bombers. There's certain people that are just fucking really gullible man yeah you can get them well not one of them ever most of them when they're interviewed

afterwards when they're out they always say that same what line of like i know what cults were yeah and in fact when they would explain to people what was going on they'd be like i know your thing this isn't a cult it's just a bunch of people living together dressing the same doing whatever you know like they talk about it they explain a cult while they keep telling you like it's no it's not that we just all eat in the documentary they were saying well they were joking around that everybody thinks it's a cult and they're like well if we're in a cult at least we're in a good one. And it was for a long time until one guy leaves the cult and sends out a mass email. It's like, hey, man, this guy's been hypnotizing me and fucking me for the past 10 years. Really?

He found out he was being hypnotized. Oh, I mean, he's doing hypnotherapy on them. Wow. Remember in Boston? He's putting them in states. Remember in Boston, that hypnotist? Frank Santos. Yeah, and we saw a door guy pass out.

Yeah. He tried to do the whole room, and a door guy off to the left was just gone, and somebody pointed out to him. Yeah. That door guy would be like a candidate. Yes. Yeah, well, when we used to do Stitches, when Greg Fitzsimmons and I were coming up in Boston, Frank Santos was the fucking man. And we would all go watch, because it was a comedy hypnotism show. It was fun.

And he would put people under. And some people he couldn't put under some people We just in front because you're doing it It's not like you could get hypnotized if you wanted to in a relaxed setting I had it done once it's very interesting And you yeah friend Vinnie Shorman he hypnotizes fighters And he gets to like get to the root of like whatever their conflict in their mind is and try to sort things out Make them perform better. It's not what you're thinking. That's that's why I always don't believe in it It's because not what I'm they're not like you know and your eyes are open like walk that way. Maybe not you

Here's my concern. Maybe some people you can do that, too This is what I think I think what what I experienced was like a different state of mind It seemed like I'm like wow this is like a drug like I'm on a drug I mean this is very strange, but it was very pleasant. And it was very, uh, it was very, I was present and pleasant. It was like, I was right there and I was like looking at things from a different angle. It's almost like I had removed some layers of clothing. That was like my conditioning in life. I got to look at things like this is very much like a psychedelic drug Someone described to me once where I heard actually I think it was on Howard Stern also a hypnotist that came on that does their thing

Said this is essentially in a level hypnotizing If they're listening to this while driving in a car rolls you and they're just like not even thinking they're just kind of like but these Are the it's still a state of hypnosis when you're just kind of driving and not thinking you just yeah Hitting cars you're not in danger of not thinking You're just like You're not hitting cars You're not in danger of crashing You're just like On this complete No memory

Present autopilot Yeah Doesn't that weird you out When you find yourself doing that You're like what the fuck Oh yeah Yeah like I'm doing everything right

I'm on the right road I'm in the right lane I'm not speeding You're like I forgot If the last three lights were green Yeah but how did I Just baby dragging behind you How am I just zoning out

While I'm driving You're like those last lights Were green right I'm not crazy're like Those last lights were green right I'm not crazy Dude it's so frustrating Watching people text and drive And you watch them weave into the room Like pull your fucking phone down

When you drive You can see it You can see it ahead You're like that's a texter for sure God damn it 100% I always want to pull up to them Just look at them

Too dangerous Look at them texting Look at them texting It's fucking jackass You know what I do When they're texting On a red light And they're looking down

I'll just like honk next to them and so they just start going before it's still red. Look up. Well, you don't have to do that now with CarPlay. CarPlay is the shit. You just speak your text? Yeah, man. I do it all the time. I take care of so much shit when I'm on my way to work.

I can say, text Big J. Go fuck yourself. Bam. And it says, go fuck yourself. Send it? And I go, yes. Send it says, go fuck yourself, send it? And I go, yes, send it. Send. I don't know what this, in my car, one time me and Dan Soder were driving somewhere, and I was like, hey Siri, or whatever you got to say. And it was like, hey Siri. And it was like, what would you like me to do?

And Soder just goes, suck my dick. And then the car goes, okay. I have no idea why. It went, okay. Texting suck my dick to Anthony Cumia. I was like, oh. That's hilarious. That's hilarious.

I've never texted Anthony Cumia ever. Hey, suck my dick, by the way. If you have like a shitty microphone in your car, it'll fuck up. Mine does that when it's like, call so-and-so. They're like, calling this other person. You're like, no, no, no, stop, stop, stop. Mine, I wear those little AirPods, and sometimes I pick up the wrong ones. I have ones that I have for the sauna, and then ones for real world.

And the ones for the sauna, they get cooked. They go bad. Yeah, they go bad. So the microphone's bad. I'm bad yeah they go bad so like the microphone's bad i'm talking to people they're like where the fuck are you i'm like all right this mic's bad it's cooked it's over so get sweat in it and shit and it gets fucked up but they still play music like you can still listen to audiobooks on them they never that never dies but the microphone's gone yeah and so if i do that like hey siri call ari shafir it's like you

know texting greg could be anybody like yeah yeah it doesn't know what the fuck you're saying And so if I do that, like, hey, Siri, call Ari Shafir, it's like, you know, texting Greg for 10 minutes. It's like, yeah. It doesn't know what the fuck you're saying. Aaron Snapper. It'll play a book for you. I like it'll just keep guessing wrong, though. It never goes, I don't get it. You gotta understand.

What are you saying? One day it's gonna talk to you, like, hey, Jay, is that really what you want to say to your friend? Why don't you reconsider it? Think about this. Suck my dick, really? To Anthony Cumia? Are you ready to burn that bridge?

Do you think perhaps that Anthony Cumia is gay and are you gay? Is that what you're trying to say with the text? Can I get some context? Is this more about you than him? What if you opt in for AI to give you advice? That would be interesting. What if you opt in for that? Like high mathematical probability advice? Yeah,, what if you opt in for that? Like high mathematical probability advice?

Yeah, yeah. If you opt in. So if you say, text Anthony Cumia, suck my dick. And it's like, Big Jay, what are we doing? I need some context here, first of all. Why are we doing this? Are you saying suck my dick because that's what you would like him to do? And are you gay?

Or are you being insulting? Is this known as possibly rasphobic classic projection is this what you want do you really want to put that energy out there in the world I the voice AI is gonna be a problem does it sound like yeah that's gonna be because we made that joke when Soder left the bonfire like they gave us that program there you look and you just type whatever and sodas voice will say any anything fucking crazy still on anything it's

crazy this full podcast of me having podcasts of people that I never talked to like Steve Jobs there's a whole conversation with me and Steve Jobs apparently the people just did on a I think they did it all on a I they can do anything now it's over like it's over like any idea of what is or is not the truth, it's going to become a real problem. Do we have a date on it? Because I feel like I heard about it one day. Chat GPS. Well, it just keeps going.

I mean, it's four right now. It's going to get to five. What, level? Yeah. It's like different levels. Like, early VR versus now is like miles difference. Nobody's getting nauseous anymore. Fuck, I just had a question.

I can't remember what it was. No, I feel like it's... What were we just talking about? It hasn't changed as much. Catchy PT going forward. Yeah, no. AI making decisions for you or giving you suggestions.

I'm not going to remember. But it has something to do with it. The voice podcast that looked like you? Oh, yeah, using my voice. Oh, no, this is what it was. That fucking TikTok banok ban like what is this actual law that bill has nothing to do with tiktok yeah yeah there's nothing to do with it's it's all about having power to restrict access to like what's the deal with tiktok let's figure

out what it is like a fucking evil well first of all they nailed it adam curry doesn't think they are adam curry's perspective when i talked to him, and Adam Curry's brilliant. He said he thinks that they're eating tech in America's lunch, and they're trying to block them out because it's a Chinese-owned company. And because they're saying that China's scooping up all the data, guess what? He goes, that's exactly what these other companies are doing. They're all scooping up your data. The idea that your data is going to China is a problem. What does that mean it goes to China like because China is represents competition and they developed an app. That's the most addictive app ever

Curry MTV original VJ huge tech guy. He's the fucking original podcaster. He's the pod father. He's number one It's why yeah, he's a couple things. He, he's super, like, deep in on the internet, man. And so, yeah, it seems the same. It seems it's just an app that they're making money off ads. But I will say what I've never seen before, because Christine, my girlfriend, is, like... She's on it nonstop. And I really, like...

No, she stops herself now, but the fact that you're in a position where you have to stop yourself, and, like, she can't wait for me to go to the bathroom or whatever so she can just start seeing more of them and i i'm genuinely afraid to try but i almost like almost like the same way i want to try crack once like see what all the hubbub is about i want to go on and be like is it getting i'm not into watching bite-sized videos it's not my thing what it does is it finds what you're into and one of the ways I know that is my 12 year old and my 14 year old have fucking completely different feeds.

They talk about it. Like my 12 year old is into like weird facts and strange things. All kinds of stuff that the 14 year old's not into. The 14 year old's into like dress up videos. It's like they're all people are in a different shit and that's what it'll find your thing. It's like really good at that. But it's also also super invasive. But then the question is, how much do we know, other than what we found out from Twitter,

how much do we know about what these other companies are doing? You just sign up for someone's app. How about when you're talking about something, and then you see a Google ad for it? What happened there? We all know by now. What the fuck is going on? You can turn that off. You can turn that.

That's actually a function. If you go into, like, Facebook on your phone, all of them, you put turn microphone off. It's an option. So it doesn't do that. If you turn the microphone off, though, the app doesn't do almost anything. It's just annoying. It makes you almost keep it on. That's the only reason I have it on.

It hobbles it. Yeah. It hobbles it so it can listen to you constantly. That's too far. Following shopping habits or something, it's like maybe. That's way too far. What about like an Alexa helps you solve a crime because it was recording or something? I hate that.

If we didn't know, if this whole thing with Edward Snowden didn't come down, we would, and that was a long time ago, if you really stop and think about it. We would have no fucking idea that there was a government full-scale surveillance program that was on the American people. Like, on everybody. Like, they could spy

on anybody. They don't have to have warrants anymore. They're just, they can do whatever they want. They can get all your emails, all your voicemails. Like, that is wild shit And we found out about it because a guy told everybody and then had to hide in Russia Damn, I scrapped 30 billion images from Facebook and other social media sites and gave them to cops. Oh my god Yeah, it's back to a perpetual police lineup. Oh, so no more of that. They're not in the system. They're not in the system.

Look at that. 30 billion images from Facebook and social media sites and gave them to police. So now they have your name and your face. So if you have a fake ID, if you get pulled over, they know exactly who you are. And they can run that through some fucking computer that has a database of everything. That was a big thing. Social media, everything you've ever done. That's so much deeper than DNA evidence because they would say that if someone didn't have their

DNA in the city that you couldn't find something. It was their first time crime and they weren't now. You could be like, did you buy a shovel recently? You're in the system if you have a phone. What is this TikTok law? Because people are freaking out about it and people are telling me that I have to look into it confusion is calling it the tiktok law for the restrict act is what it's not listed in there right i'm sorry but it's you know that's

like uh don't say gay bill never really says don't say gay in any of it yeah that was a misleading one yeah it's very misleading but that's also kind of how it's being sold to people as like this is what's going to stop the bad tiktok stuff Right, it's like hey tick-tock is not mentioned in here. So why it won't do that at all So what's so this is what instead of like just going after tick tick-tock. They're making this sweeping act and the restrict act is described as a Systematic framework for addressing technology-based threats to the security and safety of Americans. That sounds ominous. It grants the Secretary of Commerce the authority to review transactions by certain foreign entities who offer information and communications technologies, products, and services in order to identify, investigate, and mitigate undue and unacceptable risks to the national security

of the United States or its citizens. This includes, but not limited to, impact the country's critical infrastructure and digital economy, sabotage or subversion of ICTS in the United States. Boy, that could be interpreted a lot of ways. Any which way. CTS in the United States. Boy, that could be interpreted a lot of ways. Interference and manipulation of federal elections, which could mean you're just skeptical or you're gullible and you bought into some conspiracy theories and you're talking about them.

And instead of just being able to just talk like a nonsense person, you get jacked. So it's kind of like subverting the press. Undermining the democratic process to steer policy and regulatory decisions in favor of the strategic objectives of a foreign adversary to the detriment of the national security of the United States. It's like, man, this is all so open to interpretation. Like, think of those things. Impact the country's critical infrastructure and digital economy. That's easy to do you can impact it

What what if you impacted in a positive way? Like what are you saying impact it the digital economy like how do they what have you done? Do you promote a certain coin and it blows up? impacted Yeah, I mean if you if someone like, think about these Bitcoin guys. If Elon posts a Dogecoin image, immediately Dogecoin goes up, right? Doesn't that impact the digital economy? So what does that mean?

So what if he says the crypto is bullshit because he believes it? Well, doesn't that impact the digital economy? Yeah, they could arrest him. And are they talking about the digital economy that exists now, or are they talking about a centralized digital currency, which is what China does, or which is what they want to do? Are they saying that Elon Musk will be illegal for him to pump Dogecoin? I don't know what they're saying.

The problem is the way that's, I mean, obviously I'm not a lawyer, but the way that's written, scroll back down so I can read that, the way that's written, impact to down so I can read that. The way that's written. Yeah. Impact to the country's critical infrastructure and digital economy. And digital economy is included in there. Like, what does that mean? I don't know.

I've never made money digitally. Yeah. But look at this. So this thing, information, communications, technologies, products or services. Right. So this is this is ICTS. This thing, information, communications, technologies, products, or services, right? So this is ICTS. Sabotage or subversion of ICTS in the United States. What's ICTS again? So it's information, communications, technologies, products, or services, right?

Okay. So in order to identify, investigate, and mitigate undue and unacceptable risk to the national security of the United States. So if you did something that's so subversion. So imagine if you said, I think these people are full of shit. And I think, you know, what they're trying to do is gain control of the United States. And I think we should resist that. That would fall into that. And they're selling it as TikTok is doing this.

TikTok is diverting our elections or TikTok is diverting our economy. They're not're selling it as TikTok is doing this. TikTok is subverting our elections or TikTok is subverting our economy. They're not even selling it that way. They're not even selling it that way. These countries are the foreign adversaries that may do bad stuff. So they're like, it's a risk that they're going to do something bad with this.

Yeah, like they've listed using a VPN as a way to subvert that, which would be illegal and you get a gigantic fine and maybe 20 years in prison. To use a VPN as a way to subvert that, which would be illegal. And you get a gigantic fine. You'd be 20 years in prison. To use a VPN here? Ugh, how do you still— Imagine. They're going to criminalize that?

Imagine they're going to criminalize VPNs. I'm always told to get a VPN. You should get a VPN. Potentially criminalizing the use of a VPN service or sideloading to access services blocked from doing business in the united states under the act due to the text stating that no person may cause or aid a bad council command induced procure permit or approve of the doing of any act that violates the orders issued under the act what oh that's so confusing bro they're trying to gain more power. This is creepy.

This is not good. And I just got to hope that people wise up and don't pass this. Does it seem like this is something they're passing? I don't know that it's gotten that far. I know it's been proposed. Do you think there's an order to it where it's like first we bill China as going after Hong Kong and Taiwan. Now we see them as the enemy. Now a business associated with them. We can get rid of that now.

Yeah, I don't know, man. I mean, the problem is TikTok zombifies people, so if you take it away, they're going to revolt. Yeah, they won't. I don't think you have to take it away, but I think that act has nothing to do with TikTok. If people have legitimate concerns that people are abusing and overusing TikTok,

that's a conversation people should have. Sure. But if this, this is not that. It's not because of that. It's not because everyone's using it too much. This is about what they're getting when you use it. Yeah. All that stuff seemed very vague to me.

Obviously I'm an idiot, but all that stuff seems very vague when they're reading out like what they can get you for. Yeah. And that last thing about acts that are listed as impermissible under the act or whatever the fuck the wording was like, what the fuck is you covering all the bases? It seems like it's so open to interpretation. Now, imagine if something like that existed during the pandemic. Yeah.

In the beginning of pandemic where people go, you know, I don't know if these fucking masks work. You know, you would immediately get. That's against the public health. That's against that. That's right. That's exactly what they're saying. Now we know they don't work.

So then it was, we think that you can still get sick even if you get vaccinated. Immediately, you would get banned from things. So this was in place. Well, this guy got it. Been gone. A meme guy got found guilty for posting memes. I don't know the exact details of his quote. He got found guilty? Yeah, they found him guilty. And then what? What does that. I don't know the exact details of his court. I found guilty

Yeah, they found him guilty. What what does that mean? You know the man this guy? He it was a very subtle parody of Hillary Clinton. He was like I'm trying to say With this thing like to Hillary voters. They could just stay home and text your vote into this number. Wasn't that it? Parody yeah, they took it seriously or somebody said, can you believe this is happening? They found the dude who did it and they fucking arrested him. He tweeted that out. Avoid the line, vote from home. Text Hillary

to 59925. Vote for Hillary and be a part of history. Amazing. I mean, amazing. Amazing. He was convicted today by a federal jury in Brooklyn of charge of conspiracy against the rights. It's the context.

You took away the context of the parody. That's just subverting. If you believe that was true, don't vote anyway, man. You shouldn't get a vote. You shouldn't get a vote. You shouldn't be able to vote if you get duped by that. Yeah. Was there a line?

Oh, nice. Why would anybody wait in line? We're worried about old people, right? Yeah. But at a certain point in time, should you really still be voting? If you can't drive without murdering a bunch of people at a fair, you cannot vote. There's this recent conversation that Biden had with Don Lemon. Yeah.

Have you seen it? No. There's this recent conversation where he's like like he asked him if he's been vaccinated it's very strange he has now i don't know again i don't know if this is real here's the problem i didn't watch it when it came out and with ai now you don't know if it's really more you don't know what the fuck is real i love it i love the idea that we're not going to believe anything in pictures it's only gonna be a real life but this is like a video of biden like stammering like we can't find what he's talking about and he's kind of drifting and talking about different things and none of it makes any sense to anybody how long goes it from

no it works yeah that's it you you got the vaccination yeah are you are you okay i mean you see no it works or you you know or or the mom and dad or the neighbor or when you go to church or when you're. No, I really mean it. There are trusted interlocutors. Think of the people if your kid wanted to find out whether or not there were there's a man on the moon or whatever, you know, something. Or, you know, whether those aliens are here or not. Who are the people they talk to beyond the kids who love talking about it? I do feel sympathy. I feel like when I smoke too much pop before a show and I go on a tangent in the middle of a joke and don't know where I'm going.

Oh, yeah. That's how he sounds. Those are fun. Yeah. And I'm not saying, no, listen, for real, though. But wait, you were though. But wait. What was that? You were there.

What was that? What was that? I don't know. Like at that point in time, should you still be voting? Yeah. Like if it wasn't the president. I mean, if you can show, like, should we, I don't want to restrict anybody's right to vote, right?

Nobody does. Yeah. But if you're like some fucking crazy crackpot QAnon person and you've got an uncle that can't read anymore and you take him in there to vote. We're going to fucking vote. We're going to give him a migratory tail of grain. You know, you like start writing things in and like. Also.

How about a voting exit? If you can't vote until you're 18, maybe you have to stop when you're like 80. Yeah, these laws aren't going to affect you. They're going to affect us. Yeah. I mean, stop being in line. Yeah.

Every day's a gift, bitch. Just live it out. Yeah. I mean, stop being in line. Yeah. Every day's a gift, bitch. Just live it out. The video was edited just a little bit, apparently. Oh, for sure. Oh, how much was it edited? They're trying to find out. That's all you need. You can't believe any of it. Amazing, though. That's amazing. It looks so seamless. Yeah, he was telling, he went into a story. He was answering his question, but then he

went into a story, and they took out that part, I guess. Oh, what cunts. Just to make him look rambling. He pumpers around plenty, though. He pumpers around plenty. At some point, let's say you have the dad in a family who's leading it, then he becomes a little older and he starts going senile. At some point, all the kids are like, we don't have to listen to him anymore, right?

Yeah, you got to take care of him now. Now it's like we got to take care of dad or else he drives a lawnmower on the highway. You have to take care of dad. The other chicks are taking over at this point. I have friends that have dads that are compromised. It's a real problem. It's like you can't leave them alone. They don't know where they're going.

They'll just get in the car and drive. They'll, you know, go someplace and forget how to get home. And they don't want to get out the keys. Well, they don't want to stop living their life. And then sometimes you have to, you know, put them in a place where there's going to be medical supervisors watching over them because they they don't know what's going on how awful is it like horrible bruce willis oh my god knows it's coming well he's not even there yet

it's like yeah it's like what yeah it's incurable what he's got he's pretty fucked up he's got something called aphasia and then there's's also some other diagnosis that he got recently, like some form of dementia. No. Yeah, some neurodegenerative type deal. Bruce fucking Willis? Yeah, it won't get better. And he's aware that over the next probably year, I guess, or so,

he's going to become not aware of what's going on around him. God, what causes that? It's something with a- What would you do? Would you just go into senility or would you like handle it i would try mushrooms yeah because you know the neurodegenerative process of like any kind of a disease like that i would imagine when you talk about what is the there's a thing that mushrooms can do change your neural pathway lion's mane and um golden teachers and um and psilocybin.

They apparently can help to grow neurons, which is very, very unusual. There's something about it. Psychedelic drugs actually help neurons in the brain sprout new dendrites, which look like branches on a tree, to increase communication between cells. These drugs can increase neural outgrowth. They can increase the branching of neurons. They can increase your synapses. So I would imagine, if it can do that, that there's probably some benefit if someone's got something wrong with their mind. And it seems like it's feeding the mind.

Maybe. It's worth a try. Yeah, it's worth a try. May as well. Dude, that's the greatest theory of all time is Terrence McKenna's stoned ape theory. They just evolved them?

You think that's how people became people? That we were primates and we stumbled upon mushrooms and we started eating them and then we became better hunters. We got smarter.

If it does that, doesn't that make sense? If you're a monkey and you're eating mushrooms all the time, you probably figure out things. I'd like to imagine it happened instantly, where the mushrooms, the monkeys eat it, and then just suddenly like, what?

Whoa. There's a video on that. You just got back? Like, yeah, what the fuck? There's a video. Although no one I know who tastes- Yeah, this dude, Bob Seska, he made a video. Nobody I know who drinks tons and tons of mushrooms, though, seems like they're evolving.

Yeah, true. I know. That's a very good point their fashion stops changing they never seem like no dude i'm above you yeah you gotta help you know what you have it already oh that's it yeah some of them no no no no that's a very good likeness of you joe that's not it i'm gonna i'll find it i'm sorry jamie i'll find it. I'm sorry, Jamie. I'll find it. Talk amongst yourselves. Well, we got Big Jay Special coming out right now. Oh, shit. Dog belly.

Coming out right now. How excited are you, Jay? I'm so excited. Ari came in and showed me everything I would have never known how to do at all in special making. That's the funniest when I tell people is that when Ari was like, I'll help you. I was like alright So I guess now we start the process of Hiring the first of what 50 people we have to hire Clue so you just gotta hire a producer yeah, he's like how do you find a lighting guy?

I'm like no we don't someone else do I have to go to a boom microphone store interview them Yeah, but yeah Ari walked me so yeah yeah i'm pumped man this is uh when was your last one hold on we'll talk no that's not it it's not god damn it this is crazy i have so many videos on my phone i'm such an idiot oh i found it i found it i found it here it goes here it goes bob seska i uh actually had him make this back in like man I want to say like the 90s it might have been like 2000 or something like that or 2001

a chimp instantly changing did you get it it's the stone deep theory like go full screen it's made it one time. What? Oh, shit. My name is Steve. How dope is that? Damn, that's cool.

Okay, I fucked up. I fucked up. That's not Bob Seska. That's not the one he made for me. That's a different one. But that one's awesome. Who did that? Can you find out who made that?

If that's possible? That was on Comedy Central. It's funny. It's on Comedy Central, and then the video underneath of it said, like, it was, why the stoned ape theory is bad. It was such a funny. It was on Comedy Central, first of all. Like, relax. The Bob Seska one, now I remember, was different. It had, like, aliens first of all. Relax. The Bob Seska one

now I remember was different. It had aliens and laser beams. That one was cool. Do you remember that one? No, this one was cool. That one was dope as fuck, but that was not the one that I had anything to do with. But that's Terrence McKenna's theory. He thinks that they just started eating mushrooms and figuring things out. It's

backed by climate science because that was, at the time, there's a giant jump in human brain size over a period of like two million years the human brain doubles which is bananas apparently and so what it coincides with the tip tank trip tank trip tank stoned ape theory but is that just the website that has it hosted? It was a show on... Oh, that was the show called Trip Tank? That fucking thing's awesome. So he thinks that

this time, this period of two million years, it coincides with these rainforests receding in the grasslands. And so the food sources change because then there's cows shitting in the grass and then they're looking for different things to eat and they flip over cow patties and find bugs and shit to eat. They've always done that.

They think they ate the mushrooms, too. They tried them. And when they ate them, they realized it makes them see better. It increases visual acuity in low doses, and it also makes you horny. It produces synesthesia, which helps cultivate language. Dennis McKenna has the best descriptive of it because he's, you know, he's Terrence's brother who's like this legit scientist, a genius. And the way he breaks it down, he talks about the way psilocybin interacts with the brain is really perfectly aligned with something that would make the brain grow if primates just kept eating it and evolved into what we are now.

We might be a combination of animal and mushroom. Say that from another planet. Joe, you can't eat them. I can't. That's what I was going to say. You're saying all these beautiful things it does, it makes your brain grow. What happens to you?

It's the connective tissue of language. And if I eat them, they just grow. The texture and taste. Nothing to do with all the magic of them get candies It's I know I will that's what I'll do like yeah, generally, but like it is funny They don't think I'm actually throw them right back up on pure text nothing to do with the poison in them or anything. Yeah, it's dusty Yeah, I like them They're good taste like I like a chicken gristle in my mouth, I go gag over a trash can for five minutes. I like just the straight mushroom because you know what you're getting, too.

You're not fucking around with some ground up pills that some hippie made. That's why I never understand edibles to me. Was it point one or one? I had a bit about that. When someone's made a batch of weed brownies or something, you go, well, what if all the weeds and what? How do you fucking possibly know that? Yeah. They don't. Each one's 30 grand. Someone's made a batch of weed brownies or something. You go, well, what if all the weeds? How do you fucking possibly know that? Yeah, they don't.

Each one's 30 grams. You had a bit about it with the 1X, 2X, 3X days? Yeah, because I had a bit about the gummy bear. When the guy told me to take just the leg, I go, what? I'm like, why the fuck are you selling whole bears? It's so ridiculous. They were so strong. You remember those gummies?

Gummies hermanos. Bro, they were so strong. They ruled ridiculous they were so strong you remember those gummies hermanos bro they were so strong but that's what i'm saying if you know is there possibly no weed in the no arm no no no no no no no they they those guys they had it down those guys just were trying to kill you dude i gave my brother i gave my brother one he wasn't like from a legal place and he came to meet me one day and I gave him, I'm like, this one, dude. The next day, the whole family, two different families are coming over for Passover or something. The next day, he's like, hey, did you take that gummy back?

I'm like, no. He goes, oh shit, I can't find it. I'm like, dude, there's like eight seven-year-olds in this house. You have to find that gummy right now. It's really dangerous. One of the kids had it and he was hiding it. Oh my god. He had it and he was hiding it. Imagine if he just ate it. Thank god he was a little

hoarder. Yeah. It's amazing what weed... That's a nice way of calling us Jews. I've never gotten the kind of high from like edibles or weed though that's like hallucinogenic almost. No, I mean, do you remember when you gave Ralph Sutton, my co-host on SDR Show, he's Lewis' co-owner of gas digital

Ralph he took okay one of the stars Okay, stars of death that you gave him and same thing and he went home And I was like but the description of something where he was like I felt like I was on a reality show I thought there were cameras watching me and I'm like from fucking weed You ever see the video when Joey Diaz doses Owen Benjamin on the show with it Yeah, Joe Joe made a video like I cracked them Joey look there's a real thing with that, you know. Alex Berenson wrote a book called Tell Your Children. And it's all about instances of psychotic breaks and schizophrenic breaks from people that are heavy marijuana users.

There's like a something that happens to some people where maybe they have a tendency to schizophrenia or maybe a tendency. I think it's that, yeah. And then a high dose of weed just pushes them over the edge and i've seen it happen i know people that have lost their shit they're not the same and they don't come back they're not coming back they're not coming back yeah because most of them they keep smoking it too i know one guy who came back one guy came back one guy was like hell i'm just watching the fbi's on my i'm like dude you're a fucking middle act like what are you talking about but he came back he came back.

He came back. He just stopped smoking weed for a long time. And he was one day like, wow, that was pretty crazy shit. I can't give any more details. But it was, he's alright. But I know another guy who came back too. You ever talk to Shane Moss about his like... That's who I was

thinking of. I think 30 days, he did what every day mushrooms okay and then he like covered himself with some mud that wouldn't let the mushrooms breathe out of him and he went to another place yeah i saw him way later and it was like dude i know this sounds crazy but mathematicians are coming up to me telling me that i figured it out i know i realistically i know but but i'm telling you these mathematicians are telling me that I figured it out. I know, I realistically, I know, but I'm telling you, these mathematicians are telling me. I have all the answers. Oh, boy. Yeah. It was wild.

He's back now, but like... Talking to somebody who's disconnected is... Odd. It's so odd. It's also trying. Like, it's very, like, it's funny for a second. Not funny, but it's almost like amusing for a second how, like, out of it they are, and then it's terrifying that that could happen to someone's brain. Didn't Huberman just post something?

Someone told me that, oh, Tulsi Gabbard told me this. Huberman just posted something about marijuana in high doses with kids is leading to an alarming number of mental illness problems. Really? I can see that. They're not done developing? Yeah, I don't remember what he wrote. I didn't read it. I had a couple of cocktails

and I'm listening to a conversation. Did you guys smoke or do whatever when you were still growing? No, I didn't. You didn't for sure, right? No. I did not. I mean, I did.

I had a couple of... Like over the... From age... You know, from teenage years to 30 years old, I probably smoked pot five times. No, but I mean like 12 to 17. Nothing. No, I didn't do anything.

Yeah, me neither. That was the years that I was martial arts. So I very rarely did anything. I mean, if I had a beer, I felt guilty. My dad smoked pot and I thought that's why he didn't show up a lot. And so I didn't smoke pot until I was that's why he didn't show up a lot and so I didn't smoke pot so I was in my 20s and then drinking I just I had one of those like tried a sip young and thought it was so gross that I was like I couldn't imagine

yeah and then also when you're young you watch people get drunk and it's like that rookie drunk where I'm like I'd rather not be that guy at the party right right we gotta start teaching our kids how to drink right it's an embarrassment every time. Well, it's a thing you do when you make things prohibitive. Yeah. You prohibit them. It's like Catholic school girls when we were kids.

They were always the girls that wanted to get with guys the quickest. They were just trapped in this world of all girls wearing skirts, no guys around them. And they got out of there, they're like maniacs. Like everybody knows. Like that kind of suppression doesn't work on people. People don't like being told what to do. They come from that core group of people. Ari, I wouldn't say it like that. I would say that

those young ladies are hungry for the cock. The world gold stars are from that group. Have you ever seen the drinking that the I think it's a website, it's called Texas Street Fights. Oh,, no, it's just essentially It's always on WorldStarHipHop to 6th Street is just chock full of gigantic women fighting until their fat

Guns come out. So and it seems like all the cops do is go in and Like from a distance, pepper spray the group. So it's just these women fighting and ass cheeks out. And then you see, like, this spray of, like, piss coming in. Girl fights. Girl fights. Look at the rest of them just eating. Just wanted to eat their.

Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, Jesus Christ. I don't want to watch this, man. These are really good cameras. You should. You should walk outside once in a while. It's happening.

It's at 6th Street. It's wide. I got the front. Over by the. I don't you should you just walk outside once at all. It's happening It's that six tree gets why about the front over by the I don't like by the highway I don't I should like your head hits a pavement. It's not fair I like the idea of them and then it's very quickly like a reality check we go someone could get fucked up Yeah, really fucked up man. Yeah, super dangerous. It's so dumb Like but and it's just booze. It's always booze. It's definitely up, man. It's super dangerous. It's so dumb. But entertain. It's just booze. It's always booze. It's definitely Coke, too. Yeah.

Coke starts that shit. Let's not discount Coke. Yeah. It's just fucking so dumb. But people just, when I was here, it was for Moon Tower last time. We were at that burger place, P. Terry's, waiting in line. And they're like, that's particularly the outside of that place. It's like a late night spot

that is just always drama going on. And there was like preppy white dudes in some kind of an argument with Latino girls. The girls' boyfriends were almost telling,

like the Hispanic guys were almost like, stop. Leave it alone. Whatever the problem is, the dudes were kind of just over it. Like, who cares?

And the lady just kept cursing out this like tall leave it alone. Whatever the problem is, the dudes were kind of just over it. Like, who cares? And the lady just kept cursing out this, like, tall, nerdy kid. And then she went over, and he was just like, all right, like, shut up. Like, enough already. And she took her phone and, I mean, hit him. I've never seen something like this happen before. She hit him right across the forehead, and he was kind of like, it didn't seem like it hurt him that much at first. He was like, whoa, hey.

And then you just saw the line. The blood? Like form, yeah. It started running down. You're like, yo, she split him. Wow. Hard. And they drag it.

And then, but this is what's amazing. This is Texas, dude, which I love. While that's happening, we're like, oh, shit. And they're like, number 68, Oreo milkshake. Oreo shake. They see it every weekend. Dude, having a girl like that in your life can get you killed. Dude, my ex-wife, one of our early dates.

Or get you put in jail for killing somebody, like one of those guys. Yeah. We went outside, me and Lister and Cantor were out there, and we saw a guy holding a purse and a girl trying to wrestle it from him. Oh, my God. And then Cantor's like, we got to go out and say something. And so we went out. They were like, ma'am, are you all right?

She goes, mind your own fucking business. And then Cantor's like, dude, she's going to get you killed. And then we just walked back in. Yeah, you never. Who said you should do that? I stayed inside. Unless it gets violent. Protecting the women.

Unless it gets violent, I'm not doing shit. Just screaming and arguing? Because they'll go after you. That's what cops always say. Almost 100% of the time. Backstory. Yeah. Almost 100%. Anytime you've been...

Yeah, to be that guy, I don't think I've done it, but I've definitely watched it backfire quick. It's fucking dangerous. I mean, it's like, hey, dude, I think the lady wants to be left alone. And she's like, fuck off. That's what cops say. Cops say when they show up, sometimes the women will attack them. We're fighting.

Get out of here. Yeah, it's fucking scary. I was just wearing them out. I was getting ready to take the late rounds. People lose their fucking minds when they fight with each other. The cops always say that the scariest thing is going to a domestic case. Yeah. Oh, yeah.

Who knows? It's the most emotion, yeah. Both of them are fucking drunk. Someone's got a gun. Guy runs into the room. You don't know what the fuck to do. You're a cop. You're standing there.

The guy comes out with the gun. Oh, Jesus fucking Christ. You shoot him? Like, what are you doing here? I think the fear of that situation, though. How scary is that? Because he's so enraged because of his fucking wife. Oh, my God.

And you're a cop. You've got to fucking assess this instantaneously. What the fuck? You get some information from the phone on the way in. The office tells you. But once you get there, like, fuck. I'd lay everybody on the floor instantly every time, no matter what. Get on your fucking face.

Get on your fucking face right now. Israeli in them. That's the Israeli in them. Clear every room and then be like, all right let's talk navy seals stop yep exactly take no chances well you'd kill a lot more people that way by doing that yeah for sure because people would definitely like fight back some people can calm people down some people can calm people down i'm not that guy but some people you can't calm down and some people like you can get into some guys on pcp and they're fucking full rage.

Oh, you're holding a gun on them. They don't give a shit. Yeah, wow. You're not going to be able to calm them down. Well, some people also want to die. There's that. And, like, they want to die by cop. That's a real thing, too.

Suicide by cop? Yeah, that's a real thing. It's grand. Yeah, they give it to them, too. Yeah. They give it to them. I mean, and for the cop, the cop's got to deal with that. I know. It's funny. uh man i forget what it was i was watching years ago it was a guy that was trying to do that suicide by cop and they had uh it wasn't even anymore like oh it was

in america they had a sniper oh jesus christ like uh a roof like a rooftop away across the street or something. And he was describing when the guy was holding the gun, and he just noticed that he mimicked the motion more than once. Kind of naturally, he kept doing the same thing with the gun. And the fourth time he raised the gun up, he shoots the gun out of his hand. Oh, my God. And then the guy just goes and lays down.

Oh, wow. Pretty wild. Oh, I saw that. I remember that now. That's insane. Damn. Because his face, he wanted to die, but when that got shot out of his hands, he just realized how he's like, holy shit, what the fuck just happened? Yeah, you don't even know what you're asking for.

That kind of a skill is- What a shot. That's crazy. He's like, I might as well just try it. Yeah, there it is. Oh, that guy's prone, too. Nice. Oh, jeez, he shot it right out of his fucking hand.

What the... Mikey McKiernan? He looks like... Shot it right out of his hand. He looks like Mickey from the series. That guy's so lucky he has fingers. He's lucky in every way, shape, and... That guy should play the lottery right after that.

Right? You're a lucky bitch. Yeah. You should be dead. You shouldn't have any fingers. If it was Dog the Bounty Hunter arresting him, he would have let him get some lottery tickets. He would hold their cigarette for them while they smoke,

like handcuffed. Oh, would he really? Talk to him about God. He'd let him look at his wife's big fat titties. Big fat ones. Rest in peace to those big fat titties. Oh, she's dead? Yeah, I think he's already moved on to another chick.

What do you want him to do, wait? No. He's dogged the bounty hunter. She was awesome, though. First of all. She was awesome. How old is that guy? How old is Dog?

Probably close to 70. Yeah, I mean. If I had to guess. It's a hard life. You're fucking banging on doors, getting fugitives. I can't believe. Every day is a risk. I can't believe for the, let's say, class of people they were,

that there's not a loose picture of Beth Chapman's titties in the world at all. He's 70. The dude's 70. Look at him with his hair, with the sunglasses. What an amazing picture. He never lost that fucking hair. That is such an American person.

Oh my lord. I mean, Doc the Bounty Hunter might be the most American guy that's ever lived. Look at the gold chain hanging from his neck. The Oakleys. The Oakleys. He's got a Ric Flair chest. The bleach blonde, long ass, beautiful hair for an old dude. Beautiful hair.

For an old dude? I mean, he's got some rocker hair from the 80s. Red skin. He's got some poison hair. Look at his skin. Leather. Leathery. Fuck your sunscreen.

Wait. Dog the Bounty Hunter's never even touched sunscreen. It's got some poison hair. Look at his skin. Leather. Leathery. Fuck your sunscreen. Wait. Dog the Bounty Hunter's never even touched sunscreen. Touched sunscreen. It's got chemicals in it. That dude is just taking sun in the mug. Yep. What was the recent crime that he jumped in on, put his name out there? Was it the-

Yeah, yeah. What happened? Was it the Petito? He was looking for the kid who killed a missing in Florida with a girlfriend. Oh, yeah, yeah. The guy, the van life, the van life couple.

They wound up dead, right? They wound up, he killed her and killed himself? No. They just show news and it's just Dog the Bounty Hunter

knocking on doors with a piece of paper like, have you seen this? He just went solo boots to the ground in America somewhere. With the cameras

conveniently knowing where he was. We'll find out. What are the odds that they know where you're just exactly in the middle of a city What does it say he's knocking on doors? Yeah, do you know this guy goes? Yeah, everyone does he's on the news Yeah, that was a scary case They which one was that they got pulled over by the cops Yeah, and they had been in some sort of a domestic squabble again domestic fights right and uh something i don't know what the

details were of it but the cops let them go well in the rarest of situations and then they did what in the rarest of situations they i don't thought i don't think this happens a lot but the girl was crying and telling her story, and then the guy was telling his side of the story, like, behind the cops, and the cops were definitely, like, more on his world of, like, it's chicks, right? I mean, we're in small spaces, you know, they act, and he's like, yeah, sure. I mean, they're not, I don't want to sandbag the cops and say, but it is, like, for whatever's going on, she was hyper-emotional and screaming and crying,

and he was, like, kind of, like like bickering about whatever you know this this and then they just they let him go and then what they do probably a sociopath right yeah yeah he probably figured out a con the cops and to be the killer he killed her right I killed her and I either he killed himself it's hard to know because I think like the alligators got to him. Oh shit I think I think when they found his body he had been consumed. Oh, yeah, he was all yeah I think some things had consumed it might be pigs too. There's a lot of wild pigs out there But the pigs you'll eat everything they'll eat your bones man

They'll eat everything if you leave a body where pigs are that's the thing about They'll eat everything if you leave a body where pigs are that's the thing about friends like how he snatch on Tony It killed Tony yesterday. We asked if that was a good way to kill people he said remains were described as skeletal We're confirmed using dental records. Oh Brian laundry. That's a different one. That's the guy The Brian laundry yeah So he was consumed so it probably wasn't pigs. It was probably rats. He was found. No, gators would swallow you whole. Yeah, good point.

He was found, dare I say, through no help of Dog the Bounty Hunter. Yeah, remember when they couldn't find him? There was a national manhunt on for him. Yeah. And he was just out in the woods. Well, not the woods. The Everglades are so crazy. Yeah.

Do you know the Everglades, 99% of all the mammals are missing? Really? 99%. Yeah. Dude, I went. You know how when you% of all the mammals are missing? Really 99% yeah, dude I went you know how we were driving on the highway You'll stop like there's a green belt or some hike or something so I did that at a rest stop in Florida though driving across the state and to go into the woods you have to open up a giant gate That's like 20 feet high then a barrier like the Berlin Wall then another 20 foot high Fence and you go in and there's like a path and a sign and it said like

don't do this alone. There's fucking panthers everywhere. So you have to be with somebody and then I just turn around and left. So they're probably thriving but they need stuff to eat and the problem is everything's been killed by pythons. Pythons. There's a half a

million pythons that are in the Everglades right now. And there's also people spotted Nile crocodiles. They don't think the Nile crocodiles are a breeding pair. They think somebody might have had one and let it loose. And if that's the case, it survived. But they have a shoot on sight. Like if you see Nile crocodiles. Invasive.

They get 20 feet long and they eat fucking zebras. Damn. I mean, those things are giant. Well, they show those things that are walking across golf courses and stuff. No, no, no. These are way scarier because crocodiles will eat you. Alligators will leave you the fuck alone for the most part. They could eat you.

They might eat you if you're swimming. Right. But crocodiles will go after you. Like they eat people. Like crocodiles in Africa, the Nile crocodiles that we're talking about, my friend Jim Shockey, he's a professional hunter, they sent him to Africa

to kill these crocodiles because they were killing so many villagers. Everyone in the village was missing a hand. Is that the one where the boat turns over? Is those crocodiles

in the boat and they just keep pulling the boat down? That was the guy in a kayak. Yeah, that was in some magazine. That story.'s 45 years long and then he think it flips it over Yeah The crocodile swam up to the kayak flipped it over and pulled him out of the kayak and swallowed him whole but what else legs were Still in there. He's pulling it out. Yeah, I just keep sinking like has been chewed alive brother. They are

Monsters they are monsters and here's the crazy thing the pythons are such monsters that they're eating the alligators though Pythons they what they found a dead python with a 12-foot alligator inside of its body. I just saw that it's Bananas yeah, they I mean think thought it could I don't know how big the other was I might have exaggerated It's a good place to get rid of a body the glades. That's where those oh my god Who's gonna go walk by it. No one's walking by it. That's where those kids from that bully movie, there was a true story of that, they dumped in the Everglades.

And the only reason they got caught is because they were young, dumb teenagers who just kept telling people. Oh, God. They just kept telling people. They kept telling people. Like one person would go, he goes, all right, don't tell anybody else, but we all killed the bully yesterday.

Of course they did. And they couldn't stop telling. That's my favorite. That movie is made by that Larry Clark guy who makes all of the... Gummo? Yes, like Gummo, like those kind of Harmony Corrine type guys.

They make all those like shitty kid movies. And so the movie's made to be, it's very sexually explicit. It's a very attractive cast. And then when you look into the story at all and they show it, it's like a fat Samoan guy. Everyone's like a Florida pig that they thought they were gonna be.

I'm like, what are all these sexy kids fucking and killing each other for? And they're just outcast, awful looking people. Yeah, the ones who have no other options. This is my friend group. That's so interesting. Michael Pitt was a character in that. That handsome son of a bitch Bijou Phillips is Rachel minor That's always weird when they have a movie and you see what the real person looked like and then you see them like when

What's her face Catherine Zeta-Jones? Played Giselle de bronc Blanco. Yeah Blanco, you know cocaine Queen that crazy bitch from the godmother Oh, yeah, she's terrifying and she was in those cocaine Cowboys documentary. Yeah, when then you see Catherine Zeta-Jones The fucking son playing her how about they couldn't they do that that scream We're just switches right at the end of blow they couldn with movie makeup, and all the time in the world, they couldn't make Johnny Depp as ugly as George Young. They just couldn't do it.

He shines through everything. He's too perfect. So does, somebody saw that in the movie theaters, and they went to that picture of him, and somebody went, throw Mama from the train, and then they realized he does absolutely look like throw Mama from the train. Mama Fratelli.

Oh, really? That's great. Yeah, dude. He was really great. And again, he was gorgeous Johnny Depp the whole movie. Remember when they got that hot lady to play Monster? What's her name? Oh, yeah.

Charlize Theron. Do you think the rest of Hollywood is like, can you just hire one of the ugly ones? Why do you have to hire the hot one? No one fights for the ugly people to get their roles. Why are you hiring pretties to play our roles? She has to get gross to do this. Who was it that put on the movie for The Dark Knight? Not The Dark Knight, The Batman.

The new Batman. Was it Colin Farrell? That handsome fella? He was the penguin. Oh, the penguin, yeah, yeah. Yeah, see what they did with him? What did he do? He doesn't look any...

Well, that's a good one. But Charlize Theron actually turned herself ugly for that movie. She's hot as fuck. So movie. She's hot as fuck. So hot. She's hot as fuck. I've seen her in real life. She's fucking hot. And she decided to gain like 100 pounds or whatever the fuck it is and shave her eyebrows off and make herself look like shit.

What did I ask you to look up? Yeah, this guy. So he played the penguin. He's a handsome fella. And they put some crazy shit on him and got rid of his hair and made his face prosthetic. Give him like a fat face. Like that's him in the penguin. I mean, he don't look anything like himself.

But that's just prosthetics. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Charlize Theron just did it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Big difference. Big difference. Those people that do that, like for a movie.

Remember the machinist when he became like an un-orexic? Damn. It's killing Tom Hanks. Does he have like bad diabetes and shit from doing that from like from what I think from like jumping up and down Waits for characters really yeah Yeah, he had a bad cheesesteak What is uh what we're just Googling. Oh, whether or not Tom Hanks really has diabetes.

That doesn't make sense. We'd say kidney problems, maybe. Maybe it's that. But I think it's like his health has been like. Oh, he has a family history of diabetes. So he's always had it. Did he go up and down for roles a lot? He would be thinner, yeah, for sure.

I mean, especially, he was a little older. He did, like, cast away and had to get, like, gaunt. Well, I know McConaughey. You know what I mean? He's been, like, heavy, yeah. When McConaughey did Dallas Buyers Club, he got fucked up. Yeah. That hurt him.

Yeah, that hurt him. He had a hard time, like, recovering from that. Like, you're basically on death's door. You know, you're letting your body eat itself. That what happened it's people don't realize how scary that is like for a person to do that for a movie like for a movie i know it's so inconsequential really just to entertain people for two hours like what homeboy did with the machinists christian bale he got to death's door man you ever see that that? Oh, yeah. Yeah, he was a while. Oh bad Yeah, I was crazy even worse than McConaughey did in Dallas Buyers Club

Yeah, but seems to take his shirt off and all spindly like that Yeah, but he came and played Batman like six months later. He got on those Well, I mean it was that that was after American Psycho where he was like jack jacked Yeah, but it's just that image of him in the machinist like that that like with his arms are splayed by like a bird so in it below that yeah that one like dude he looks like he's on death's door like that looks like a person who's been starved in a concentration camp look at him he must have been so proud of himself when he was doing that suck in thing he was like it's very crazy to do but he seems to be okay with it but like I said, I know McConaughey really got hurt from Dallas Buyers Club

He had a really hard time getting back from that It's not a joke man your body's eating itself like to do that for a movie So it's one thing to get fat like mark Mark Wahlberg got fat for a movie recently really Yeah, I just ate like fucking 30,000 calories a day and he gained 30 pounds, big gut. But then he lost it again. So that's not good for you. But it's still probably better for you than almost dying of starvation. Yeah. Like I'd rather be that.

Yeah. And that you could fucking with this. I mean, he's obviously a very disciplined guy. He's going to lose the weight and get back. Also, he's not that bad. But it's not as dangerous. Does he have a third nipple? It's not good, though. Does he? I does he think his third nipple? Let's see

Yeah, yeah, that's a third mole you fucker. No It's got the little white in the middle come on. It's a third nipple This is a my friends in high school same thing this is a conspiracy theory that is unfounded. That's for sure I bet looked it up. I bet someone who said that before unfounded conspiracy theories. We've. I bet looked it up. Someone has said that before. Unfounded conspiracy theories. We've had the proof. We cannot have those. We saw the proof. This is what the original

does Donnie have the same third nipple? Is this a thing in the family? Is that what Wahlbergers is doing? That's a third nip for sure. This guy's got a third nipple. It is a third nipple.

Wow. Did you already know this? It's fine. Mark Wahlberg third nipple. You knew. No. I saw it. You just saw it.

Wow. Would you assume that a vain man would get that removed, or maybe that's the best one to suck on? Ooh. The most sensitive. Yeah. Maybe that little one is wild. Yeah.

The god nipple. Oh, like a clit nipple. Yeah, a clit nipple. It tells the future. Yeah, that one's the one. Just rub it. Rub it. It's like when the teacher put his thumb on their head

and made them go to ecstasy. Just tweak that one nipple reaction like the tightening of the aerial and the loosening up together Yeah, why is it ever a full nipple? It's always just like Over right like an extra fingers not like the biggest finger the Danny DeVito if you have two thumbs Well, how would you know which one it is? The Danny DeVito nipple. If you have two thumbs. How would you know which one it is? Yeah.

Wait, yeah, maybe it's like, no, no, this is the fake nipple. This was my second. You know, if you lose a pinky, you lose like the majority of the power in your hand. No. Like a large amount. I think it's something like 50% of the strength of your hand. Imagine how strong you'd be if you had all index fingers. All index in this finger.

Like, this is a bitch-ass finger. Yeah, pinky doesn't do much. And it takes away 50% of your power. This little finger works out all the fucking time. It's still weak as fuck. Look at this little bitch. Nothing. It's only good for making you look gay while you drink, too.

But these fingers are strong as fuck. And that's, like, imagine if you had a hand of only these fingers. Yeah. Like, what is this pinky doing? How close are we to that? Like, is it, am I using that very often? Do I need a dainty, I can do dainty shit with with these why do I have a dainty little bitch ass finger makes the base of my wiener feel thick

Okay, use Propagation of the taper down effect Yeah propagation of the of the yeah the taper down effect gentle yeah if you're a gentleman you jerk off like you're drinking tea with a pinky out yeah

remember when this was the worst social thing you could do by accident have a pinky out oh no your friends would mock you

we saw it yeah I think that might be just us that might be a comedian's thing that's how you are going to do it

if regular guys are drinking coffee I bet they do this all the time. They don't even think about it. Yeah, exactly. They don't think someone's going to jump all over them and mock them. Why would that be a problem? The comedian Pete Dominick told me a story years ago in Vegas about, I don't know if

it was somebody finding out that somebody else in the school jerked off different than everybody or him. But it was like, but you know the rumor those those bullshit rumors that go around every school some girl had a dog eat her pussy and someone jerked off in school or something um this was the whatever got caught jerking off in school whoever the kid was and when everyone was making fun of them they're like ah you see steve was jerking off in school and he said one kid was like yeah steve you did you were jerking off in school. And he said, one kid was like, yeah, Steve, you were jerking off. And he goes, that's when everyone just goes, hang on, Steve. Wait, what?

He was doing what, though? What is this knuckles up thing you're doing, you fucking weirdo? That's how you find out. He goes, oh, you guys are jerking off. No, no, no. He was on top one second, bottom the next second. That's hilarious. Isn't that funny that we'll judge someone on the bottom the next second. That's hilarious. Isn't that funny that we'll judge someone on the method they use to jerk off?

Yeah, like you're out of the group. How weird is that? How weird is that this bothers you? Yeah, because you don't jerk off with anybody. Why should it even matter? It seems like hyper-aggressive. I've seen it in pornography and it bothers me. And I say, he's doing it wrong, which isn't true.

But if it works, get you there I'm like nah you don't even know the sweet pure pleasure of going the other way it's like a guy who's got an unorthodox pitch also though he might like his pressure low because again we're talking about the pinky finger versus the right finger

how low are we talking about? I feel like if you're doing it this way, you're more fucking a hole that's empty on the other side where you can fuck the full pussy of your fist the other direction. You could also just be like rubbing the dick against your hand, no pressure, for slower. That's crazy. Is it crazy to enjoy what you're doing? No, what you're doing is crazy. Like you're cradling it.

Yeah, you're cradling it. Just, you know, that's what Rock the Cradle of Love was about. I've heard stories of guys whose, like, their jerk-off is to, like, have their- Slow down. Fuck their own thigh in bed, basically. No, no, no. Don't do that. That was me when I was little.

I would just rub it against my jeans. Don't do that. Is that another restrict act they're going to get us for spreading bad information? That's bad information. What if they take away that? Yeah. Imagine if that fucking act passes through and they go through old podcasts. Everybody bad information? That's bad information. What if they take away that act? Yeah. Imagine if that fucking act passes through and they go through old podcasts. Everybody's going to jail. Oh boy, I'm fucked.

Everyone's going to jail. Yeah. If you said anything negative about a candidate. Anything negative about the government. Cause like it's still up, so it's still doing the thing. Yeah, the whole thing is spooky, man. It's spooky that they just keep wanting more and more control. It's just like we were talking about with cult leaders.

Yeah. Like it starts off, they're kinda okay, and then after a while they go crazy, and then they push it to see how far they can do it. I think that's a pattern with human beings. I think that's a pattern in the government. I think that's a pattern in cults. Comedy centuries do that when they were like, hey, this material, we own the material forever, not just the recording. And then you'd have to go, no.

And they're like, okay, well, we had to ask. You had to try. Yeah, and it's like, why even try? try yeah, well the problem is you're an artist and when you mix art with business stuff gets very Slippery I hate it. I don't know how to do any of it business Yeah, you're pretty much useless with that

Yeah, but it's also one of the reasons why you're so fucking funny. Yeah. Oh, thank you. I think that's, it all goes together, man. I don't think those people that are like really good

at crunching numbers are the funniest folks. You should have seen this. It was like, Jay, I need your notes on this edit. And he's like, okay, well, you know, I've got to see my daughter tomorrow.

I was like, Jay, put it on and watch it now. I did not want to watch it. Oh, my God. I didn't want to do anything. I did not want to watch it. Sometimes on the edits, it doesn't matter now. It's out now, and I've seen it, and I'm very happy with it.

But sometimes I go, we need your notes on the edits. And I'd go to click the email and watch it again, and I would see Ari's copious notes, his wonderful notes. And I would go, I'm almost one at random. I go, I don't know how I feel about his third note, but I pretty much agree with all. I was going to call you guys, but it's all pretty much that. Yeah, let a friend edit it. That's a good move, actually.

He did, eventually. Someone who's a good editor, let a friend edit it. Yeah, we got Cotter to edit it. Not a bad idea. He was right on everything you say when you go, I don't know about this. And I go, sure. You know better than I do. Like, let's do it.

Yeah. Well, we set the club up so that you could film there all the time. We set the club up so there's three angles in every room. There's going to be a lot of specials. Yeah, that's the goal. The goal is to let people, like, look, everybody knows now, and Ari, you're a great testament to that. You need one fucking banging special on YouTube, and then you're off to the races. People can see it.

It's legit. Everyone hears everybody on podcasts. Matt Edgar says this. You introduce a friend on a podcast, hey, he's a really funny guy, really funny guy, and then you're at home going, can you prove that? Right. Is there any proof of that out there? Well, at a certain point, they trust you. Like, I've never lied once

Like I've had a lot of people that I really I like them, but they're just not that funny right. I just can't I Can't help you yeah, you know it's like Whatever it is, but but when you put out a thing it's doing comedy as long as I have is seeing somebody It's not fun who's seeing somebody especially when you like them and like a friend you're like Oh, I don't know if you have like the basic. No. Like, because even people. Basic what? Like habit? A good example I've been doing comedy longer than Lewis and Dave. Yeah.

From Skanks. And like, but when I when I was like, you know, whatever eight years in and they were just starting Someone's going hard. I'd watch them. When it was eight years I'd watch them and they would like and they were just starting. Someone's going hard. I'd watch them. When it was eight years, I'd watch them. And they were funny on stage, but it wasn't like they,

I saw what their lack of experience was in it. But I could see right away, I'm like, now you guys have like, I wasn't worried about them. I was like, you guys are going to be fine. You're a very funny guy. I don't know what level they go to necessarily, but I was like, you'll be around comedy. You're not a lunatic. Yeah, and then there's some people where you're like, damn. I love this guy Then you watched him you go. Oh

Zero chance such a nice person It's unfortunate, you know sometimes you become friends with them before you see their set yeah And then do you see them in there? So they want to you know want to, you know, hey, you know, I know you're doing a show in Minneapolis. I'm actually from there. I'd love to open for you. Like, yeah, we got a problem.

I just booked somebody. I'm already there. I'm already there. I'm already there. I'm already there. I'm already there. No, no, no. You kind of have to have a real conversation with them.

Otherwise, it's going to keep coming up. But you got to kind of figure out a way to say it in a way that's... Fortunately, I haven't had to do that to too many people. Yeah, I'm not that person at all. Just take it. Yeah, I mean... Absolutely take it. I never asked someone if I could go with them on the road.

I never did. And all the guys that I took on the road with me, I asked. You know? Thank you. I asked Ari. Ari was like a doorman. You know? He was a dude that I knew at the club that was just starting out, and I knew he had potential.

Like, I would see his late night sets, and every now and then, he'd hit a spark, and I'd be like, ah! It was just like you were figuring it out. And then I took you to Denver one time. Denver. You were murdered. That was my first road thing.

Murdered. The Denver Comedy Works. It was the first time Ari was ever in front of 350 people who were so happy to see a show. It was like, what the fuck is comedy? And he murdered. He murdered. That's a high bar to sit. It was so fun.

Yeah. Everybody that shows up at Comedy Works is like, it's my first show. I'm like, oh, they won't be as good as this. Well, you had been running with Waiton, right?

Because you'd been doing those late night spots where if you're a beginner and you're going on after like five killers in a row, the audience just leaves. Like,

big chunks of them leave and you get this like dead sort of crap. Oh, all of my New York chops are, I followed Dave Attell. I said, I followed Dave Attell at the Comedy Cellar for 10 years straight, 12 years straight. dead sort of oh all of my yeah all my new york chops are i followed david tell i said i followed david tell the comedy seller for 10 years 12 years straight every night what could it did

that's the only way but it's funny you almost say the same thing it was uh like a tell asked me if i wanted to go on the road with him and start doing stuff and then he would call me to wow yeah i would feel weird to go right can i do whatever i would never ask anybody no fucking way you can't ask someone will ask you it's like if you ask it becomes a thing and now now someone's not hiring you because they want to they're hiring you because you asked yeah you know i mean it's not like we don't know you're a professional comedian you know if you ever need anybody's a funny one but How many people can you take on the road? I can't find a comic. What do you mean if I ever need one?

Also work that John Carden's a comic from here in Austin. He was in Phoenix before this, and he's opened for me one time there. We've never lived in the same state or anything, but he's on the road with me a ton. We just connect. That weekend, he does a killer job. I'm happy to promote him. It's like going on vacation with someone. I want to go on vacation with you. We go on vacation. We're going to have a killer job. I'm happy to promote them. It's like going on vacation with someone. I want to go on vacation with you.

We go on vacation. We're going to have a good time. If you and I just went to Maui and just fucking drank pina coladas and fucked around the ocean, we'd have a great time. We'd have laughs all day long. But not all comics. Some comics, if you went to Maui with you, like, yeah, man, I'm going to go to the gym. You'd be in your room watching fucking Netflix. Just waiting.

In paradise going ugh You know like some people you don't want to talk to we was anchored for four days, and we did our show We did fun show though, it was fun two shows do we have to do in one night? No, it was another place. We waited in a turned out bus in between shows. It was dope. They were like robust people. Like I was impressed with them. Like everyone had character. It was very interesting.

Anchorage is wild. Like the level of character that the average guy has in Anchorage is above normal. Because they're around fucking moose and bears and it's frozen half the year. They all carry candles in their car because if it goes off they gotta like blankets and candles you keep blankets and candles in your car those i used to go that was one of the first places fuck dude that was one of the first places that choku charlie's out there that would headline me every year so before i was almost going anywhere in like the lower 48 i was like like a regular there like every year i would go they would have me i love that place the chaos of that particular place choku charlie's

was insane it was like a powder keg that never went off it was a hip-hop room an electronic dance club upstairs downstairs like a like a honky-tonk band and then they have another room that might have like a pretty big actual like metal band i think godsmack had played there at one point it's like a couple hundred people and it was looked like a log cabin from outside like very unassuming one of my favorite guys i ever interviewed on the show is this guy john reeves who owns a place called the bone yard in Alaska and this place in Alaska is this one spot that for whatever reason has tons and tons of bones giant woolly mammoth tusks they've found animals from that area that weren't even

supposed to be living there these different fucking lions and cats and bears and all these I mean insane amounts And it's a small area. It's just a few acres. And he's got other areas on his, he has an enormous property. He's like a mining guy. He's very wealthy, but like down to earth, like a regular dude, smoke cigarettes on the podcast. He's fun fucking dude. So he tells a story about how they dumped a bunch of fossils in the east river because they didn't have any storage from them fossils that came from his his land and so he was trying to get it back and he got all these these this paperwork that shows where it was dumped so then he gives it out to the internet on the podcast so then these guys start swimming

around in the fucking river in the east river and one of them finds a step bison jawbone so it's proof that some of that stuff did get into the East River at least that piece did so this guy finds it diving looking around the bottom of the East River in that fucking toxic river

and they pull out this thing so he pulls out this thing lips are exposed in that shit yeah man his lips well exposed in that shit. Yeah, man. Oh. His lips. Well, he had the scuba thing on before.

See, he's got the thing that goes on his mouth. He took it off when he got out of the water, but that's a step bison jawbone. That's crazy. Yeah, so that means- I'm not assuming, by the way. I would be like- Well, that's a piece of it. This isn't money. Yeah.

It looks like, when you see the full version, that lady has it in her hand. So what does that mean? That it's there? See the full version, that lady has it in her hand. So what does that mean? See the full version? That lady has it in her hand. That's what it looks like when it's fully connected. So that was a deceased bison's jawbone. So they have a shit ton of those out in this boneyard. And this is something that they found in the East River.

So what his story, it seems at least to be proved correct is that someone at one point in time dumped a bunch of these like Priceless fossils into the East River the East River because they just have any storage and like the 1930s was it was it something like That was like the 1930s with those much later for some reason because you haul bill was a Marshall here, and they didn't even understand. We got a bunch of these. Fucking dump them. Dump them.

They didn't understand how crazy it was what they had. One of the times I was in Alaska, they took me and Dave Smith actually to the animal preserve area out there by the glacier. I'll tell you what. Being a person who really mostly saw wild animals only in a zoo before, the animals there, while majestic, are very pretty worse for the wear. Like when you see a moose, it's not like a beautiful, like it is, you know, the hordes,

but when you get up to them, there's like scabs, like real like they've been in a fight or something. They were nursing an eagle back to health. Yeah, like real wilderness animals are like fucking, they're living a life. They don't live long either, man. Yeah, this shit's around all the time. Did you see that video of these two dirt bike riders and One of them fucks up and rides his dirt bike past a bear's den No, and doesn't realize it until the bear comes charging out of the den Adam

No, oh my god. Um, let me find it Jamieie you got it you got it look at that jamie look at this bro are you fucking kidding me oh my god oh my god oh my god we crashed him right there yeah look at this holy shit oh my god wow that guy revved his engine and that's probably what scared it off the buddy's video dude that is death that is death oh you know how terrifying that was when they show that like people have been hit by like tiger i saw a video the other day it was like family was attacked by maybe it was a panther or something or a puma or something like that but like it looks like when you especially when you see the hits they're always just it almost looks they're playful

playing with you but yeah it's so powerful this from a tiger would just rip your face entirely off yeah it's like tyson trying to pity patty you don't understand you literally don't have any weapons they have weapons on every hand and they have their faces a weapon and their bite strength is so superior yours You couldn't even imagine it and they're so much stronger pound for pound than we are you're just playing defense You're not gonna win you're trying to survive. Did you have a regular house cat that like you have a situation with? He starts like swinging it. Yeah, I had a house cat that was feral Yeah, and i had to get him fixed because he was pissing in my house it was one of those things he was just spraying all

over my house like he was feral i got him when he was a kitten so like a friend she found a bunch of them underneath the apartment building and her and her boyfriend gave them out to people and i took one of them so i had this kitten and i had a like literally i had to stay with it for was like for several days alone in one of the bedrooms in my house to get it to be comfortable enough with me that it would let me touch it. I would go near it. It would hiss at me. Climb the fucking drapes.

It was wild. I was like, what am I doing? Why did you take it home? Because I was like, I was committed to this. I was like, I'm going to make this work out. I'm going to make this work out. And so these cats, like, when they start pissing in the house, you have to to get them fixed because now they're going to do that all the time. And I had to get them right when he first started doing it.

I saw him do it. He lifted up his ass and he sprayed all over my bathroom like you little motherfucker. On purpose. So I call my veterinarian and he says, how feral? I go, he's fucking crazy feral. I go, I'm the only one who can pet him. And he's like, oh, my God. But the guy, he's my friend. He's Dr. Craig. He was the shit and so he goes you're gonna have to capture it

So I got it in the bathroom and it's hissing at me and jumping on the counters like it knows I'm doing something and so I throw a blanket over this fucking and I wrap him up in a blanket and I put him in a Hamper and I take him to the doctor and I'm like, good luck. You could have the hamper in the back. Good luck. He calls me when the operation's over because it was right down the street from my house. How did you do it?

I go, how did you do it? He's like, we managed. It was not easy. He's like, Jesus fucking Christ. I go, I know. He was a fun guy. He was like, Jesus fucking Christ. I go, yeah, he's a fun guy He was a Jesus fucking Christ. I go. Yeah, he's he's feral but I could pick him up I could pick him up, but he would purr okay?

Like purr louder than any cat ever purred like so happy that he was okay He was safe like programmed in his mind when he was a bitty bitty tiny Baby was like the world is a scary place for a feral cat the world is a scary place you still have the cat no he's dead now but became completely domesticated not really it was only me that was really yeah it was it everybody else no one else could touch him wow i could go up to him i go come on man come on man i pick him up and he'd be all right like you would even look at me like tense up when i would come near him but he knew I'm like come on man. Come on Like the purring was so loud it was like so appreciative like it was like sobbing love

You know I'm a new pet person. I never you just got the first dog gave a shit ever and I I never Was that I didn't understand, but I definitely didn't have a full grip on when people were like what even when Ari got a dog I remember when Ari first got his dog. You didn't give a shit about my dog. No, no, no. You always said don't bring him, don't put him in the back seat. He's got hair. You care more about the hair than the dog.

A lot of hair. I still care about the hair with my own dog. It's a thing. Well, my dog's a golden retriever. It's fucking crazy hair. It's everywhere. Yeah. Always everywhere.

Especially the summer. I'm changing on that and getting much less. Caring. Like wigged out about that it's so worth it just say it's so worth it is what the thing is but it took took us a couple months me and the dog to get like it was never that i thought the dog was off it was the cutest dog i loved but for the first couple months i was like i think we made a mistake in getting a dog i was like yo i don't think I was prepared

for what this was gonna be you had a bad dog too he'd come to barbecues and he'd always be up there with a hot dog in his mouth like get the fuck down and you tie him up and you find a way around and he'd like get a paw just to get some fucking nuts how old was she when that was happening six months

you can't do that she's a little over one now but like even now she's like calming down Get some fucking nuts. How old was she when that was happening? Six months. You can't do that. But that's just. She's a little. No. She's a little over one now. But even now she's calming down. She's great. But I never had that kind of feeling with an animal before.

It's totally different. But imagine asking a six month old child to figure that out. Oh my God. You wouldn't. But they can't get onto the table. That's the thing. Is that the dogs can move. Incredibly agile.

Yeah. The dogs can move. Yeah. They're fucking awesome. I love them. I'm's the thing. The dogs can move. Incredibly agile. For a six month old. Yeah, they're fucking awesome. I'm trying to fucking cook. The grill. Literally on the grill and he's jumping up trying to get it. But wouldn't you? Everybody loves you. You're a puppy. Wouldn't you think that that's yours?

I'm going to get that food. That fucking hot dog smells delicious. Imagine what a hot dog smells like to a dog. A hot dog smells good to you. Imagine what it smells like to a dog. It dog smells good to you Imagine what it smells like to a dog It must be unstoppable Because dog food doesn't smell good It's grotesque But I'll tell you what I bought

So they started opening dispensaries now in New York And when I was in line They got me CBD Dog treats And I mean It's so Taking them away now a little bit more Because dog treats. And I mean, it's so... Taking them away now a little bit more

because it's addictive to me how fun it is. Because you can give her this thing. If you give her a whole biscuit, which is, by the way, the servings, you give them a... It's like a dog treat. It's a little bone or whatever. She eats. She takes it like a ritual. She takes it over to a certain spot and chomps on it,

drops some of it picks It up goes and then you're almost like she doesn't seem like anything and then 15 minutes later She starts aimlessly walking around the living room, and then it's just a dropout into sleep wherever she's at and just like down Like if you try to wait you like hey Dawkins, she's like she really does like the one I like like the bloodshot I'm like what? Man that shit. I've never seen something work so much. It's amazing. I wonder if it's what how it affects them They're just yeah, I know if she stayed and by the way, she stopped falling asleep So if that's why I said I was pulling them away cuz she's gonna she's not falling asleep She's getting used to she's staying awake, but she's being loopy.

Do you know what I mean? She's just looking at you weird. It's hilarious. I think dogs can definitely get high. Yeah, for sure. You know how I know? Because do you remember my dog, Lucy? Yeah, I think so.

She was the dog that I had. It was a rescue dog. Some friends of mine, they found this dog that was eating out of garbage cans, and they said, she's so sweet, but she's covered in mange. So in mange so i said oh okay you even go hunting for your dogs i just went no it's like somebody called me up with a terrible sob story they know i'm a pussy and so i i had to i see this dog and she's so sweet and she has mange all over her body and so i took her in and just feeding her like within a short amount of time the the mange like completely went away but what and she was a great dog but one day joey diaz and i were doing bong hits in my office

and the dog was under the desk and i didn't think about it we were just there's actually a photo on the internet of joey with a sleeveless shirt on, holding a big handful of weed. It's from that day. See if you can find that picture, because it's a famous picture. That's the picture. So that's me and Joey. That's me and Joey in my office doing bong hits. I bought like an ounce of weed, so look at that.

That was back when I was buying weed from uh the dispensary in irvine or in um oh fuck when there's like two of them what was the it was it a bad it was a bad neighborhood i'm trying to remember the neighborhood god damn it i forgot i'll remember i'll remember but so that was the day so we'd got there and gotten just fucking barbecued and um the dog was underneath the desk and then she was oh so sketched out afterwards i was like you okay but she had all this trauma for when she was young and she was you know homeless and eating out of garbage cans and shit on drugs again it all came back but i guess dogs like that are probably terrified they're gonna go back to that

life right you start getting paranoid right you're terrified you're gonna be on the streets again why do you bring the friend over? Yeah. Well, it's got to be to take me away. But imagine a dog not having any idea why all of a sudden it's like hyper freaked out about everything. Yeah.

Well, the senses in general, I've never witnessed before. I'm blown away by like she, like friends of ours who have dogs that she like is with a lot. If we're like, like Justin's house, he's got a dog they play all the time. If we're blocks away,

but in the area of town, she perks up. That's like the dog. I don't know what it is. It seems like an impossibility, but she tends to seem to recognize from a car, just like being down in a car.

Yeah, they know it. Not seeing from smell or something, she just pops up like we're near that dog. That's wild. That is wild. Yeah Well, I mean, I don't know how else she could possibly you know, I mean she's like down They have a pretty crazy coincidence weird connection with people. Yeah, it's very weird Bandit let us the cells front door from the from the elevator After after six months gone when she wasn't even she was six months old to a year old and then remember where it's not there Yeah, dude my dog cuddles with me when I watch TV sometimes like he lies next to me

He puts his head on my chest. Yeah, and I sit there and petting them It's like you're watching like a nice show and you have this beautiful love moment with this animal It's just the world That's just so sweet and all they want is just to be loved and to love you I just lean up and gives me kisses sometimes. We could love you, too. I think always knows Sometimes you gotta pee like no I gotta stay here I find always knows moments while I'm petting and I go you are the best decision we ever made you are the bet Oh fuck she bit through that leather chair over there

best decision we ever made you are the bet oh fuck she bit through that leather chair over there when they're puppies a scary thing is like extension cords that's scary if they bite an electrical cord and get electrocuted whoa yeah that's fucking scary that that happens to dogs sometimes we never had that yeah you got to be careful with those little fuckers they don't know what to chew and what not to do and you got to give them things to chew. That's very important. You got to give them chew toys, toys to bite on. Yeah, they have to be animals still. Because my dog's a retriever.

He brings over a toy when he comes to say hi. Like, if someone comes over the house, he runs and gets his toy. I got to get a toy. Presents it. Like, he always has to have a toy. Like, he brings a toy to say hi to everybody. It's hilarious. I thought I was, the way dogs play with each other also,

I thought I was going to have enemy after enemy on the street. But two people barely giving a shit, me smoking a cigarette and some guy on the phone while we just look away, let our dogs, what only looks like fight to the death. But that's their playing. I'm like, is everyone okay with this? And you don't have to talk to the other person

It's just like it's crazy. He's got like oh, hey our dogs gonna Pussies whatever and just let it happen for a minute some dogs. You gotta be careful though. Yeah There's a lot of you know a lot of people with pitbulls little they'll fight dogs So they'll fight dogs and they get close to them They don't even know why just out of instinct Even if you train them the stairs you have to have like a really good trainer to curb that Do your dogs do you remember the we there when the girl from the? So there was a waitress at a comedy club Who got a rescue dog like a pitbull and then one of the other waitstresses went over there like her friend went over there to like?

Meet the new dog and everything and like they said the dog was the sweetest dog you know she had her for whatever couple days and like disfigured her for life no yeah i mean she's a gorgeous girl and she got handled she she it was handled pretty well she's still a gorgeous chick but i mean like it's definitely oh my god um but i mean it affected her forever it was like like wild. Like emergency plastic surgery type shit. Well, you know, Whitney's always adopting wild animals. Those dogs are humongous. She's like, me and my dogs, I'm like, put them away. Whitney got like half her ear bitten off once.

What? Yeah. She goes, oh, the dog didn't even mean to do it. It's like they don't even know what they're doing. They don't know their strength. I'm like, your dog bit your ear off. That's an issue. But she kept the dog.

Now she's into horses. She got it stitched up. Oh, she's always been into horses. Is Annie Cock big enough? That lady loves dogs. She loves dogs. She's always got a bunch of rescue dogs she's taking care of. She, like, fosters dogs and then finds them homes and shit.

Can I just say, speaking of rabid dogs? Yeah, that's her after she got her ear bit off. Oh, my God. Shit. Yeah. But they put it back on. But they sewed it back on and I'm fine. She's so

crazy. She's a lunatic. She's a full lunatic. She's a full lunatic. Isn't she? She's at the mothership this weekend, isn't she? I think she is. Oh yeah. I just saw her. She did the premiere for the, uh, she produced the Burt Rocher roast. Yeah. Nice. Yeah, she's,

that's a wild lady. She's all, fuck it, I was thinking this did, yeah. Nice. Yeah, she's, that's a wild lady. She's all, fucking, I was thinking this yesterday, too. She's a, getting to know her more lately in the last few years, like, she's a boss chick. She runs shit. She really runs shit. She runs shit, yeah. It's impressive. She's an impressive person, yeah. Very impressive.

Yeah, she's smart as fuck, man. Maybe too smart. She's, like, one time I was having a conversation with her, like, out of nowhere. She calls me up. She goes, I was having a conversation with her like out of nowhere she calls me up she goes I'm producing a documentary on violence what the fuck are you doing what are you doing

how do you have time for this she told me about that wild Italian thing that they do like once a year where it's like MMA mixed with like rugby have you seen that what is it called Cherico or something A year where it's like MMA mixed with like sock like rugby what have you seen it? Oh, yeah, yeah Yeah, weird. What is it called Cherokee or something? I forget the name of it. It's some weird big gang fight

It's a big thing to see it and she told me about this She's like have you heard of this I go no what is this and so she was doing a documentary on violence and This was one of the the subjects was MMA fights and and this stuff. So it's basically it's like some kind of a ball game, but they beat the fuck out of each other. Yeah, Calcio. Yeah, that's what it is. Calcio

Storico. That's it. I don't know if I'm saying that right, even though I'm Italian. But these guys just beat the fuck out of each other, man. They throw down bare knuckle. They throw leg kicks and shit. I mean. It's their Ellis mania.

And I don't think there's anybody that stops the fights either. They just let it go until they're knocked out. I think they just decide not to kill each other. Look at this. But there's something. They said there's a game to it, and then the game stops and a fight starts. Yeah. It's just wild, man.

Look at those guys. Everybody's holding somebody down. Yeah. They hold them down. They're beating people up from the mount. And there's so many of them. Look at those guys. Everybody's holding somebody down. Yeah, they hold them down. They're beating people up from the mount. And there's so many of them. Look how many guys are on the field. Look, that guy's in full guard down there. And there's another guy who's got a guy in side control.

Wow. This is crazy. So I found out about this from Whitney. This was called... You would think that I would know about that. That was close. Yeah, exactly. I mean, that's like, essentially... That was called Smear the Queer in Philadelphia. Smear the Queer was a good one. Yeah.

Kill the cow. Ever do a hug the pole? Smear the Queer. I'll be honest with you. Kill the cow hurt more if I was holding the ball. Kill that cow. You're like, shut up, guys. You're not sensitive.

Smear the Queer. I'll be the queer. Did you ever do a hug the pole in like 21 or something? Where if you lose, you have to hug the basketball pole and whoever won gets to whip the basketball at your ass? No, we had a game called Suicide that was like a wall-ball-based game, but it was like something if the ball touched you

and you didn't catch it. It's a tennis ball always. You had to run to the wall and touch it and say suicide. But while you were making until that happened everybody else could pick up the ball and we're just trying to zing it at you as hard as they could and then if you if you pushed out and said if someone called you out for like saying suicide before you touched the wall yeah then they got a free peg which means you had to stand like a firing line And I'll tell you The fear is

There was some Randy Johnson like sidearm guys And it was almost worse When it would miss because the fear When you'd hear like the air being split As it like zips by your head And just misses you is nuts Jesus Christ Philly there was no internet yet

Crazy fucking people Our porn was all analog back then If back to go back and get those guys That were on the skyscrapers building those skyscrapers eat lunch remember those guys anglin Yeah, if you get those guys and drop them off in a tech conference In 2020 they were probably like what the fuck happened to men? What is this? You didn't even carry a lunch bag. Imagine if you just transported those guys to the future. Essentially 100 years.

The concept that someone wears a suit every day. Just looking at these guys with their pronouns on their badges. What the fuck happened? Oh, yeah. He, him? No, that's gone for sure. Roger with the man face and the man body? Oh, yeah. He, him? No, that's gone. For sure. What are we talking about? Work. Roger with the man face and the man body has he, him in his badge?

Yeah, he goes, I believe it. Everybody's doing this now? They'd be like, what is? Like, what the fuck happened? Also electricity. Also, like, you know, how come you guys have so much food? Bidets. Yeah. Bidets have a lot of food.

Food's everywhere. Bidets will blow their mind. Yeah. Look at this guy. You've seen this guyidets also. A lot of food. Bidets will blow their mind. Yeah. Look at this guy. Have you seen this guy? In the 1980s? What? Yeah.

Now we're stuck. Look at this motherfucker. Wow. Bro. And wait till the watch. Watch when he calms down. That's what's even crazier. Watch this.

What's he doing? Don't see that. He shimmies down, bro. No, no. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Watch this. This is in the 1980s. What?

Look at this. I'm having it happen right now I'm having a half athlete. I have a physical reality Oh, yeah, you should fucking physical like I'm saying my legs feel like gummy. I watched it slow down He's a fucking animal look at him the strength and the skill Along with the courage to be up there where one fuck look at him climb. There's not a dude Are you fucking shitting me? Are you fucking shitting me? Are you fucking shitting me? Jesus Christ this guy's a construction worker and he's like an athlete look at oh wow He's I don't know if you should climbing athlete. He's got a fucking tool bag on dude

He's doing this while he's got a tool bag on this is insanity He's doing this while he's got a tool bag on this is insanity How does this guy practice? Here's my question because you can't just how did you get good at this on the job? You ever see it go bad? How many guys would die? They do They have to You never seen it go bad?

You never seen it go bad? Show them like on the ground floor But to do this to do this come on man who the fuck is doing this? That's a different state of mind Bro are you out of your fucking mind? That guy could take over the world What are you even doing up there? There's nothing going on up there

What's the point? Stop, nothing there for you My hands are swinging Mine are too Have you seen the picture of the guy That took the photo of those guys sitting on that What's he doing? To take the camera

He's got his head under a car Bro, this guy's an animal That took the photo of those guys sitting on that. What's he doing 30s? No to take the camera Bro this guy's an animal look at him out there, but have you ever seen this kind of stuff go bad? There's a video like the pull-ups the pull-ups the one on the side of the building is nuts And you see him and you see when he's when he can't do pull-ups or struggle He starts to show you and he's trying to get his leg up. Yeah, I mean at some point to accept like shit It's happening. He doesn't do that last pull-up, and he's like, oh, you don't get up after that. And it's like, um. Well, you know, doing that, like hanging on a ledge and getting all the way up to the top is not easy. Even if you can do a pull-up.

To get up to the top where you can get your body weight over the side. To get your arm above it and pull yourself up and to have that kind of whole different muscle up strength oh my god look at that guy he's just standing there oh my god take these pictures Jesus Christ these guys are animals they're napping they're fucking napping Wow they're napping on a beam oh my god that's so insane my My feet are twitching. My feet are twitching. My fucking feet

are sweaty right now. That's what I said. He's brought a radio up. The guy brought a radio. He's smoking a cigarette. But back then, so many people were dead by the time they were 15.

Yeah, I got six months left anyway. Their wives only had missionary sex for procreation. There was one they were going home to. He goes,

you know what, I'm just going to lay. I'm in the middle of this. I'm going to stare death in to. He goes, you know what? I'm just going to lay. I'm in the middle of this book. I'm going to stare death in the eye every day. So when I go home, I'm happy to be bored. In the middle of this book about the early days of cities and how fucking filthy the streets were and how many diseases there were.

People stacked on top of each other. It's horrific, man. You think about what life was like back then. I mean, those fucking people did not live long. No. Dirt roads and stuff. It was a hard life, man. You think about what life was like back then. I mean, those fucking people did not live long. No. Dirt roads and stuff. It was a hard life, man. Living in an urban environment.

Disease everywhere. Black plague any day. 19 and 10. How fucking horrible that would be. No AC. No constant AC. Steam cars going down the road. Or bucket out your window to get supplies and bring it back up.

Shit everywhere. Oh, shit. Shantytowns everywhere. Like, during the Great Depression, they had shantytowns everywhere. Like, we think that this is an unusual thing. Oh, right. You have people camping in the streets. You ever go back and watch those images of the Depression? Fucking

shantytowns all outside of cities. No fucking running water. Raw sewage. Ugh. People stacked in apartment tenements on top of each other with no ventilation. It smells like shit when you walk in there. Bad plumbing. No plumbing. Outdoor porta-potties for fucking everybody in the neighborhood.

It's just disease. And outhouses. They said the plague was coming back in LA, in the homeless community. Oh, yeah. They said. What was it? Which disease was it? I don't know.

They always say the plague. The plague, yeah. The plague, yeah. The plague, yeah. The plague, yeah. The plague, yeah. The plague, yeah. The plague, yeah. The plague, yeah. The plague, yeah. The plague, yeah. The plague, yeah. The plague, yeah. The plague, yeah. The plague, yeah. No, it was something wild. It was something like, that's still, I said what was it? Which which disease was it? I don't know they would say the plague Urosis no was something wild it was something like that's still yeah, I barely even remember hearing about that Yeah, what was it Jamie? It wasn't like rickets. It was like a medieval. Yeah. Yeah, it was one of them weird chronic plague And people like well, you just got a hands-off. Well, you know, these people are unhoused. Yeah, I Like to have my house cuz I live in an apartment. People don't like that. That doesn't count.

Remember that conspiracy from the documentary about that hotel in L.A. that all the homeless outside were getting tuberculosis, and they thought it was because the girl who died in the tank. Do you remember this? Oh, yeah. She went missing. And they were like, she was studying tuberculosis in college Maybe she was a biological weapon to get to get to the homeless outside of that hotel

That's a deep yeah, what a conspiracy no she was off her meds. Yeah, she's just what is it crazy? I hate that They stretch out four episodes of something where each one was like well was it a ghost they go no it wasn't a ghost It was a real person. Yeah, no, it wasn't a ghost. It was a real person. But what is she looking at? There was clearly another person. And then the explanation of the, watch all the lights or it stops on all these floors or something.

And it was like, yeah, she came in and just whacked. So it's not crazy. Yeah. The wait time for the doors to close. Everything just added up and the whole documentary came around to like, ah, she was just a whack job, jumped in a- Well, she got off her meds. Her family knew that she was medicated. She decided to go to downtown LA and stay in this wacky hotel.

I think that's the hotel I jumped off at. But see, while they're doing all of that research and trying to figure out in the investigation, when they came with that answer her family was like yeah That's up. That's something some she probably get naked and jump into a Before yeah, yeah, that makes sense yep, they weren't even like suspicious they were like oh, right Some people are out there. They're crazy We got out there. We got a push J special. Yeah, people are pushing it. Yeah, pushing it hard How excited are you now?

It's the first one in seven years, buddy. What are you, directing the conversation? I don't know. We've got to push it a little bit. We're going to talk about it. That's his dog belly. Dog belly. Big Jay Overson, available right now on YouTube.

That's both our dog's bellies. Where'd you film that? We did it at Skank Fest, Vegas. I like the fucking set. Last year. Yeah, they did an amazing job. You look like you're ready to alhamdulillah and blow up a building leading the charge yeah no it's all we did it at skank fest two shows it was uh awesome look at your hair you sexy bitch i know it's poor ari ari thought

it just grew out and i've been on the road so much i haven't been able to get it done again red and ari didn't know that and when he showed up in the town today he red streaked the side of his hair. That's like a solidarity funny sign. Beautiful. And I don't have it. Oh I like it Ari. I'm not so I'm not such a fan. No? How come? I think you started shaving your whole head bro. Off. Yeah. Yeah maybe. Sh shave that that nonsense on the side anyway I got a bad to pay it doesn't look that bad. I gotta let it go. But yeah, what? Funny yeah, you hated it. I didn't normally wear this hair

David Lucas is so funny roasting Tony go after each other. Yeah. Oh my god. They go after each other It's as hard as I ever laugh Yeah Tony go after each other. Yeah. Oh, my God. They go after each other. It's as hard as I ever laugh. Yeah. Because, like, someone has to be, like, really killing, but they'll do it for, like, five minutes. Where you're, like, for five minutes, you're just holding your side where they go back and forth at each other. Off the cuff. Yeah, great. Man, they must be sitting around all... I know Tony does.

I bet all day Monday, he's sitting around smoking pot, trying to think of things he could say to David Lucas. And then also come up with some yeah for sure. I guarantee he's doing that little psycho I guarantee you every week. They probably both do it. They probably sit around think of what kind of mean shit They're gonna say to each other. Yeah, it is funny I will say instinct on a bike you loved it instinctually when I see David now like if I'm doing kill Tony And I see he's he's gonna go on I start right away Just like looking at everything on him just to be like I have something He's the best of that yeah him and Tony are the fucking perfect most of a the way Mooney used to drink like champagne just like

Like he's always too good to talk about your part. League is casual. Mooney was the king of casual with that little tiny bottle of champagne. Oh, bitch, please. And he would take a sip of the champagne. He would hit punch lines and take a sip of the champagne. Yeah. Paul Mooney. That was hilarious. Paul Mooney, man.

That was the funniest realization I've ever had of like I should have known all along on Paul Mooney being gay was that standing outside of Caroline's and I'm just like facing away from the building and someone said, they were like, oh, this time there's a story. Something happened with him. His boyfriend or something was mad at him. Paul Mooney's like, boyfriend? I go, yeah. I went, Paul Mooney's gay? And then they turned me around and it's his headshot He's got little circle glasses a hat that has fringes on it, and it's tied around his chin

Yeah, there it is He's gay the whole time. It was wild seeing on stage before you like look at him My brother was like how come it only talks about the one thing and not at all about the other thing it was nuts yeah he never really did just like oh about being gay yeah well in the era that he came up you gotta remember like he was one of prior's guys he was one of prior's writers and you know like r-i-d-e-r he was a writer yeah yeah he was he was a great comic yeah i mean he really was but I don't think he ever got his due no white people didn't know him

I didn't know he was till comedy we always like he was the guy at the comedy store that like when he would go on stage like especially

after something happened he always had material on it really good material he always was like anytime some shit went down he wrote something

Paul Mooney wrote something and he would go he had a bit about the spirit airlines crash no it wasn't spirit airlines it was some janky airlines that crashed into the swamp yeah and he was talking he was talking about this woman clutching her purse while alligators eating her and it was like the fucking it was such a funny bit man it was It was like right after it happened. Like right after it happened. And he set it up. It was masterfully the way he set it up.

So everyone's just laughing at these victims. It was so good. But it was like, it was so good. It was right after the tragedy. So, you know, I mean, you know, whatever you feel about tasteless jokes after tragedies. The fact that this guy went up and did that like a day later and it was funny as fuck. It was really funny. Do you think he didn't get his due ultimately because of his personality

or do you think his personality developed because of not getting his due? I don't know. I've met him several times and even done shows with him at Caroline's years ago and he was never very nice at all, like in almost any way. Mooney has a crust that you have to get through to get his trust, and once you get his trust, he is very kind. You had to compliment him. I saw him talk to an HBO guy in the back.

It wasn't just that, man. It wasn't just that. He had to respect you. You know, it was like, you know, Mooney was like, he'd been around a long time. He'd seen a lot of shit. He was a part of Richard Pryor's golden age. And now here he is in the year 2005 hanging out with me and Ari.

That was a long time. He saw some guy from HBO and he's like, Paul, how you been? Just a fucking fake, like all of them. He goes, how you been? He's like, I've been good. How about you? Like, he wasn't even playing pretend. And he was just like, he just kept going like, yeah, we got to do something.

So he goes, oh, do we? And he goes, yeah. He goes, I got to get your number. I don't have a pen. Do you? He goes, no, motherfucker, I don't. Do you? The guy's just like, that sounds like Paul Mooney.

Yeah, he didn't give a fuck, dude. No, motherfucker, I don't. When that guy liked you, it was a badge of honor. Yeah. He was laughing in the back of the room one time when I was on stage That's pretty nice. It was the nicest thing ever and then he told me I was funny. I was like oh my god Thank you. Yes, Patrice. He was gonna hate you like everybody's worried that Paul Mooney was gonna Hate him, but you can imagine this guy was around in the 70s and here

He is 35 years later watching us young fucking snot-n nose idiots the 15th. Yeah, it was my though Was it wealthy was he like yeah? I don't know he's too old DC Sold out the improv all the time back then it was still a great comment Yeah, when he would when he would go up and major at all watch him we would all three hours to He would go on forever. He's gone for a long set if you wanted to if you always going late. It's nice No, he But he was always going late. It was nice. No, he was a great comic. I mean, I wonder what the writing process was with him and Pryor. I wonder what that was like.

I wonder how they did it back then. Yeah. You know? I bet they just sat there and wrote. Maybe. Maybe they did a lot of drugs. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Did you have to let your ears breathe?

I got to go to the bathroom again. Go to the bathroom. Go to the bathroom. Man, it's been neat a lot of drugs yeah yeah yeah did you play your ears breathe the thing i gotta go to the bathroom again go to the bathroom that's my ghost man it's been a lot lately yesterday i totally over modulated i over hydrated oh yeah they gave us when we were leaving the club yesterday they gave us liquid iv yeah like it's like eight bottles of water in one bottle of water i think it's like two sure it's like two it's like it hydrates you the peter attia was explaining. I think it's like two. Sure. It's like two. It hydrates you. Peter Atiyah was explaining it to me. There's an actual formula that it works with like 16 ounces of water. Like it doubles the hydration.

I don't understand it. Sure. I just drank it. I'm too fucking stupid. Yeah, I just drank it. It's filled with electrolytes and it tastes good. And it's good for you. It's really good after workouts.

After sauna. I got that Mike Tyson, well, the student glass brand, but the Mike Tyson version of the gravity bong thing. Oh, Jesus Christ. Have you seen that? No, but Jamie had one in here. We were all terrified of it. Really? Yeah, but get the fucking thing away from me.

It's awesome. I'm sure it is. It's pretty awesome. If you wouldn't just get obliterated and melt into the couch. Do you dab? I stopped. Well, more than anything else, the process is so

like, I never got into the ritual of it. I feel like it's a lot to go through to have coughing that's violent. Oh, and then there was you know, did you see I went down. I almost passed out on Legion of Skanks doing dabs. No, I didn't see. That's on know, did you see I went down. I almost passed out on Legion of Skanks doing dabs. No, I didn't see.

That's on YouTube. You can see me going down. It's like what's happening. How did you do? Well, here's what it was. I did almost every time I would do the dab, part of like, wait, pause it for a second. Anytime I've done a dab, if it's a good dab, I would see it as like, I'd get that feeling where I'd cough and I'd almost be like, you know,

the room's got to kind of like come together for a second. You know what I mean? You're almost dizzy. Yeah. But I thought that was kind of like the fun of the high of it. And on this one, I do that. That's happening. I'm on a podcast, so I'm trying not to cough violently.

I'm keeping my coughs in. And while I'm doing that, my next inhale is Lewis just turns and hands me another dab. So I just do it all over again. I didn't breathe. And you see my head start going, and my hand starts like shit. It looks scary.

Oh, my God. A lot of people that were going, you know, everyone diagnoses you after this happens, of course, but I just almost passed out. No. You don't remember this, Ari? No. Look at Mullen.

Mullen can already tell something's up. What was it like? Like, what were you experiencing right here? I was aware still. Weirdly. But what was it like? Like, what were you experiencing? Look at Dave realize.

And he's like, no, wait. No, he's joking. And I'm fine immediately again Oh my god, I thought you were acting I really thought you were doing a bit. I'm back When I was what I was experiencing I I knew my head was going down, but I was almost, I just thought I was kind of like going down and coughing. And then my, and I heard Lewis go, Jay. And I was like, yes.

Why is the crowd behind you guys? They're going to be on camera. What? Instead of us facing them. Well, because, oh, they, but they project the show and all the stuff to the audience. Oh. Oh, but they project the show and all the stuff to the audience. Oh.

So in front of us, they're seeing a screen of us and all of the stuff we do. Meanwhile, you're right in front of them. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That seems ridiculous. It's like watching a Twitch stream. Yeah, don't do that. I never really thought of it that way. That sucks for the people that are there. Didn't we used to face the audience, or do they sit all around us?

Bro, you can figure that out. You guys can figure that out. Put cameras in a better spot. Oh, Harrington. Facing the audience? Yeah, you can have that out. You guys can figure that out. Put cameras in a better spot. Oh, Harrington's... Facing the audience? Yeah, you can have cameras facing the audience if you want to. Well, Lewis, you've heard it here. You should have the... Rogan says you're failing. Bobby's cursing this guy right now.

The people talking should be facing the audience. I agree. I agree. It's done badly right now. That's ridiculous. Your back is behind you? Why are they there? What, are you a priest? Why are they there? Are they behind you? Let me give you Lewis' theory on that. I know there actually is one, and I don't heavily disagree Behind you. Why are you a priest? Theory on that I know there actually is one and I don't heavily disagree with it the show is also for the you know the

People majority of people taking it in our watch live watching from home. Mm-hmm. So the idea is saying to play to Like each other more than play when you're staring at the crowd, you tend to go, and we did do that. So when we did face the audience, we would do a lot more like trying to, and not paying attention to each other in a conversation. On one hand, do you know what kind of courage it takes

to turn your back to your fucking crowd? Yeah, you're not wrong. Hundreds of people, and you're talking mad shit, and there's people behind you. It is an added element of danger. Well, it's also in a club where sometimes through the cracks comes somebody

who just came to the club and was like, there happens to be a... Because we're sold out pretty much weeks in advance. But they'll be... We've had like two weeks ago. Thank God they tend to be pretty cool usually where they quietly leave but we'll end up calling it out anyway. They'll be like, this is not for me. Yeah, but there was a lady

from Canada and her 17-year-old son was with her. Are we trying to is not for me Yeah, but like there was a guy a lady from Canada and her like 17 year old son Was with her we try to get him high yeah, yeah, you were on that episode But like she ended up being super cool, but they had no idea what they were walking to we lucked out that She was like a cool mom. Yeah We were like says hi we've decided you go smoke weed and he's like can I Imagine not knowing what you're doing? You walk into a Legion of Skanks show. It's crazy.

It's actually, we've yelled at the club for that before. Like, hey, don't do that to people. Because then when they're upset with us, I still kind of feel for them. Like, well, if you didn't want to see something like this, you should have to watch this. It's not their fault. You should have to watch this. It's not their fault. They should have been warned going in there.

They should have been warned. They should have been like, this is not a ticket. It's not been warned going in there. They should have been warned Like they went over and they it's it's being a good thing But it is cool when they catch up though, and then I'll go with this But there is times when people leave and you're like you can see their faces You're like, why would you have put them like you found a stand-up show after thing? Yes, I stay it's not a stand-up show. They came to watch a stand-up show and you go Well, there's this other thing and without giving him enough like it could go pretty haywire in there you're gonna hear nutty shit in one episode he had to lube up a gun and lewis had

to shove it up jay's ass yeah right there in front of everybody imagine just a random coming in for a comedy show and you're like what the fuck's going on my daughter's my daughter when she was uh turned 19 she was almost like, can I come? Like Legion of Skaggs. Oh, my God. Well, she's my daughter. And so, like, for the most part, I'm like, she gets with this comedy. Do you know what I mean?

And I was like, it's not so much the material that we're talking about that's going to get me. Now, what happened with Lewis and Dave, which I fully understand, too, they were coming to me a couple times. And they were like, hey, like, you you gotta stop letting her come to the show. I'm like, she's an adult, dude. She wants to come. I'm almost like, you guys kind of have to get used to the idea that she's an adult.

And then what they said made me, they were like, yeah, but dude, we're seeing that four-year-old little girl over there that we've known since she was a kid. And he's like, it's gonna make me not tell a story that I want to tell. For sure.

Because she's there. And I go, fair enough. And then as a little, do you remember this? As a little, yeah, she wished she could come. But as a little cherry on top that made it easier to explain to her that we're going to take a break from her coming for a while, was that night, out of nowhere, Byron, who ended up becoming the intern from the intern contest sucked his own dick on stage and looking over my 19 year old daughter like this like

all right point taking guys i'll keep her out of here on stage on stage jesus By the way, he sucked. Is that legal? This is going to impress you more. That might get you in trouble. No, they put a curtain up eventually. Like legitimately. Well, on stage, anything goes.

I don't think so. Performance art. Yeah, I figured something like that. It depends on where this is. Yeah. You might have just admitted to a crime. It was in his mouth. I understand that. Like legitimately have just admitted to a crime. It was in his mouth. I understand that.

Like legitimately, this might be a crime. Are you allowed to blow yourself in front of people? Let's find out. I feel like it's the same as masturbation. Do you think it'd be worse than that? Crime-wise? I don't know. Because it's so weird.

Well, here's the crazy thing. He sucked his own dick while it was soft. Oh, my God. That's impressive. That's insane. Did he dangle it into his head or did he come down on it. It's funny. I was wearing I said to Lewis I wonder if you had any opinions or thoughts on Gigi Allen, which this is a very similar like stage show of just insanity Yeah, shit, and stuff. I

He's such a I've been watching like these documentaries on him lately or these are like short films people have made It's funny what I thought was cool when I was younger. As an older performer, I like you have the picture out there of Jim Morrison, his mugshot and stuff. When I watched The Doors when I was younger, I thought it was the coolest thing because

his defiance and he might not even show up. And the piano player's got to sing all the songs because he's drunk with Jefferson Airplane somewhere. And as an adult performer, you're like, hey, Jerkoff, show up and do your show. You know what I mean?

Like, there's an audience waiting. Yeah. Like, there's a coolness to it, but like, same thing, G.G. Allen, like, I get you want to put on a big show, but I don't know if chucking shit at the people in the audience is, like, the way to handle it. But meanwhile, some people are like, bro, I got pelted with Gigi shit.

Fuck yes! They probably just made it on their friend. Fuck yes! You did it! Pink eye forever. Well, they always tell you, all the documentaries go, well, there was Gigi, there was Kevin, and Kevin was a sweetheart. You're like, that was like a character because he's lost in it. I. I mean he was that was a character just a piece of shit was his character

I mean a deplorable piece of shit That's the thing always be like my mother didn't give a shit about man Shat himself on stage and smeared it on his face in the name of Punk. How do you even shit yourself on set standing? No, buddy. There's videos of this. He just goes into the audience. Yeah. What's funny is- Go back to that picture.

They love him. Look at that picture. Look at his tattoo. What does it say? Life sucks, scum fuck. Life sucks, scum fuck. Smearing shit on your face. And then the other side says, fuck something.

Fuck something. Bro, I don't. It says, fuck you. that is not totally a character What's funny is they talked to his mom and stuff because this story is always like you know my mom the parents didn't give a shit About me and my dad was this and and fuck you That's why I'm angry and his mom's like no just shows pictures of him and his brother They're both in the band as like kids, just like on like horses. It's like, you know, like they were like fine.

Like a bunch of like Massachusetts kids. And what happened? He started getting attention to drugs probably is the ultimate answer. He probably got the drugs and was just like started getting, but I mean like. You peeing again? No, I'm going to get some coffee. Unfixable or like unrelenting, like terrible terrible like all this stuff he's in trouble for like beating up a woman publicly like at NYU he does that there's video of that of him just like

taking a chick and like throwing her around the room and like just whatever no I think a girl was like you know challenging his because I guess he kept saying he was going to kill himself on stage. But he moved the date a lot. He would kick the can down the road. That year would go by. He'd be like, Halloween and next year, I'm going to blow myself and I commit suicide and take as

many as I can with me. Young Shepard Smith covering it live. Look at Shepard Smith. Look how cute he was. Happened at the club Space Fish behind me last night. A band called G.G. Allen and the Murder Junkies performing at a club that prides itself in its words

on having shows on the cutting edge. People paid $7 to watch a man defecate into his own hand while he was nude. And that is just the beginning. He also looks down like, that was good. I'll also give you a, I'll also give G.G. Allen, I'll give him credit, G.G. Allen, too,

because he has a tiny, tiny pecker, and he walks around with it. I mean, real small. He never presented it well. He was actually off the stage. He was right down here off the stage. Isn't it amazing that that would be the number one concern, the size of his dick? This guy's shitting in his hand and smearing it in his face on stage.

And we're like, yeah, look at his little dick. That's what I'm saying. Boy, the courage to stand in front of people with that dick. Imagine being a smell in that place. Oh, God. You know, a lot of people say speaking publicly is people's biggest fear. I'd say shitting publicly. I'd say shitting. Yeah. I'd say standing shitting. And then smearing it on your face. God. Oh, my God. You know, a lot of people say speaking publicly is people's biggest fear. I'd say shitting publicly. I'd say shit.

Yeah. I'd say standing shit. And then smearing it on your face. God. Oh, my God. Oh, yeah. His drummer always played naked, too. He was Shepard Smith.

He was a space case. Orlando. He's live from Orlando. He's got to love this story. Goddamn. That's funny. The one that I saw, he goes into the audience, and I said, it's funny when they all are there for him,

but they don't want to get the gross shit on him. So as soon as he, like, approaches, jumps down the audience, they make, like, these circles around him to give him space. And then he, like, he turns around, bends over, and just rips a couple logs, bends down, starts picking it up in his mouth. Oh, my God, this is insane. Covers himself.

Oh, Jesus Christ, he shit in his hand and threw it into the audience. Oh, he rubs it up in his mouth. Oh, my God. This is insane. No. Oh, Jesus Christ. He put his shit in his hand and threw it into the audience. He rubbed it all over his chest. That's not the word. Dude, his face. Bro, this is so bad. And then he runs into the audience. You see the audience.

They're like, but they're still trying to watch, but they're in the hallways and stuff. Is there? What? Oh, my God. Just stop. Stop. Stop. Stop.

There's no music going. I'm not back, Jamie. Boomerang that. I'm going a bad Jamie. Boomerang that. I'm going to throw up. Oh, my God. Imagine being in the Pharaoh. In pictures, it's bad. The smell would be around you.

It would just be, ugh. Imagine getting hit in the face with Gigi's shit. And you're already sweating. And you didn't know. No. Maybe my shit himself is definitely going to throw it at me. Only the Farrah Abraham shit video is the more impressive what's that video the teen mom lady who just is so like wrapped in the point you know she is right farrah abraham

she was like an mtv's teen mom girl she was like the first one that was like famous from that yeah it just turned into she did some porn scenes she has like only fans now but she's known for being a mother she put a video out i guess like someone just leaked it, but it was her doing an OnlyFans thing or something. And it's her just turning around with her completely plastic body and ripping off two foot of uncut shit. It's not pornographic. It's like an oddly satisfying video. You ever see those where it's like when they cut lip perfect like things off and shit. It's what you're like when it's done you go Satisfying videos

Everything she ate came out for sure. Jesus Christ. It's impressive. Do you think if someone knows they're going to do that, they hold it in as long as they can? To get it longer and longer. To just really make sure you're getting the full package out in one shipment. I don't know if you could plan for an unbroken two foot of shit. Some people do it regularly.

I don't think you can plan for it, but you probably increase your odds if you can just... Just hold it in. Tighten it. Make it more like a sausage. They say if you drink celery juice, your jizz will be thick and shoot far, but maybe it won't.

Right. How would you know? Jamie found what? Jizz? Celery juice? Oh, the video of her shitting? For sure you found it. Oh my God.

Don't show me. Okay, show me. All right. Okay, show me. I can walk you through this. It's pretty good. She's pretty. Don't show me. Okay, show me. I can walk you through this. It's pretty good. She's pretty. She's so hot. Yeah, you can play from there. Now what you're going to see first, Joe, is when he turns around, there's a cork of shit that was probably

blocking the path. That comes out first. That just fires right out. Jesus Christ, dude. How much do you think you have to pay to get someone to poop in front of the camera? Not enough. Is this TikTok? This is not TikTok, no. So there's the cork. And here,

easily 12 inches. What? Two full feet. Oh my God, it's more than two feet, bro. He's coming. Stop. That's enough. That was all of it. Imagine wanting someone to do that. I want you to shit for me I don't know. I have to assume its control more than sexual you naughty girl shit for me

It's got to be control over sexual yeah, but I think maybe it's a naughty thing It's so not boys are like shit is so wrong. No. I don't know it's boys are like. Shit is so wrong. Naughty. I don't know. It's funny. I can watch that and laugh at it. I don't get that disturbed by it. No chance would I watch that in person. I'd be like, no, no, no, no, no. It's too much.

Too many senses involved. Yeah. It's also, it's a thing that's built into us to avoid plagues and disease. You're supposed to get away from it. You shouldn't touch it. Get away from that. That's diseases. You have to wipe your hands.

Isn't that crazy? Stuff that comes out of your body will kill people. That's how toxic it is. The stuff that comes out of your body gets in water, and then someone drinks that water, people are dead. She was selling for $5,000. $5,000 for stinky poop that comes out of me. Oh, wow.

People are offering her $5,000 for poop. She's going to keep doing shit. I was just like, I don't even think that that could go in the mail. I was then questioned whether or not it was really a joke, reminding her that she went to sell her poop slime on her Sophia's website. What is that? Her and Sophia's website. There is other.

Her and Sophia's website. Looks like she was selling it. Should we sell her poop? What a great, I mean, recycling situation. I think that's really dangerous. I don't know if that's, this seems like it's almost a joke. Oh. That's fake.

Yeah, that's fake. Who was Farrah Abraham? What do I know her name from? She was a team. She was a David Tells underground. She was one of the audience like celebrities. Oh, really? Remember the underground.

I think she tried to do comedy for a second, as often will happen. Didn't Stormy Daniels try to do comedy I think so it's everyone's fallback plan it's the lowest level of anything else more respect it's the lowest level of respect isn't that better for us though

a porn star can just do it comedy tour soon please tell me there's a video of her doing comedy please don't show it no plastic surgery Tom Brady can just do it. Comedy tour soon. Farrah Abraham. Please tell me there's a video of her doing comedy. Please. Don't show it. No plastic surgery. We will have to be honest.

So don't show it. Don't show it, Jamie. I'm out. Because I can save for myself, though. Well, I mean, I just, if you had a video of you pooping, you would imagine, like, man, this has got to be worth a lot of money. I can't just poop for 5,000 bucks. i'll tell you what there's a there's a money maker a high level recession a high high level like well-known porn star who i know no when we were interviewing her during maybe it was these were quarantine numbers but during the quarantine we

interviewed her over zoom and uh she was saying that she's doing a lot of OnlyFans, like private one-on-one stuff now, because we're not filming movies or anything right now. And I was like, really? I go, has anyone asked you to shit on camera? She goes, no, not really. She goes, but I mean, that would be like, she's like, that would be a lot.

And I was like, really? I go, how much? She goes, I mean, like shit, that'd be like 500 bucks at least. Yo. I'm like, yeah. I was almost like, go ahead, do it, I'll Venmo you right now. No way that's possible.

500 bucks. You gotta do it anyway. It's just where you're doing it. It's a buyer's market. Yeah. You're gonna flush it for zero dollars I have a question if you went on to only friends Yeah Can you just find people to follow or do you just only find two people find people from this?

Instagram you mean like what yeah, how do you how does someone because you can't search people right? I think you can you can search you can? I think you can. You can search people? Yeah, but I think finding people on OnlyFans would not be the allure to me. The allure would be to find them in the wild. And then you find out, oh, you can see this person naked. For sure. But you've got to think, a lot of these fitness girls that have huge OnlyFans followings, right? Most of those guys, they find out about them some is there a message So how do they finding each other they finding out about them on Instagram like is it a Facebook thing?

It's gotta be it's social media. It's also social media I think join me Instagram and that crazy like if you know girls got a great body Oh, she has to do is like work out just work out on camera and do different stuff every day And you'll get a millions of followers. You know put on make millions and millions of followers the funniest thing look hot do squats yeah a very fun thing we do is to look at like uh hot girl instagrams and just look at the comments under any like picture it's like the guys who just you're awesome but not just you're awesome it's like they call her baby and stuff because Oh, baby, glad to see you're wearing that red bathing suit again. No idea that's creepy.

So sad. Those girls live in a life of having to watch over their shoulder for fucking lunatics. Oh, yeah. The amount of stalkers that must be after them. You're constantly photographing where you're at. And they all think they're in with you. They think they kind of know you. I think this is the pipeline that started up.

Yeah, because they call them that. They're like hey babies like you know pools hot on Twitch yeah there's a it's not only fans and it's not what cam girls do but they hang out in pools and hot tubs and talk to this oh yeah we talked about this before yeah that gets them onto their only fans or whatever right yeah you know the podcast porn thing on OnlyFans? They do a podcast. A couple does a podcast with another girl, and then they fuck on OnlyFans right afterwards. We lost podcast of the year at the AVNs to that guy.

Oh, really? It's the Adam 22. That's a hilarious idea. Yeah. Adam 22. If you're going to make porn, that's a good idea. That's the Adam 22 guy. It's the whole fucking thing is so interesting.

People are very against it, but they can't say why. They just feel like this is bad for society or something. I'm thoroughly hypocritical on it. The SDR show that I do interviews them a lot, porn stars, and they come on to do that old shock job. It's like squirting contest kind of thing. Especially if I become friendly with them at all in any kind of way you right away You're like damn man. This is like a it's a fucking dark world. It's just yeah, I don't see where it's not like

like dark in some way and like everyone who's out of it at some point has some like I Guess any job, but you know, it's like this guy is a monster of a person So I'll never be in a room with that. You know, that kind of shit. And you're like, damn, man. It never seems to end. Yeah, but like in a regular job, a bad boss just like yells at you in front of everybody. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I hate that guy. This one's like fucking you. Ew. Jesus. But the whole world's like, he's fucking you. A bunch of the girls are probably showing up on drugs. There's so many like things happening. Yeah.

Do you know what I mean? And the higher level of professionalism probably from the girl, the less kind of sexy. You know what I mean? When this person comes in and goes, okay, where do I sign? This guy's fucking me? Okay, let's go. Be hard, please. Do you think they do it?

They can't be like that. Absolutely. Show some professionalism. Really? Sure, yeah. Wow. Do you think they do it? They can't be like that Show some professionalism I think girls instinctually From hearing stories And everything Don't fully understand Sometimes how a guy's

How a boner works Because a girl getting upset That you're not getting hard Fast enough or you weren't somehow hard The second they like pulled a titty out or something when it's like what's wrong as soon as you do that like it's never happening

all I'm doing is staring at it going like she's so let down she wants you know nothing's more counterproductive to what they're trying to get done it's like no attempt at doing it like especially when it comes out of like the last sexy try like do you like this do you want me to do this and you go's good, and they go you like that he goes well, then what's happening? Don't say that oh my god, you don't like this what's going on?

You must want everyone just put your socks back on we're going home so So aggressive find yourself a cab Show yourself out, please. Imagine wanting a very specific reaction from a girl like that. Imagine if a girl's attracted to her, her tits poke out. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Wouldn't that be wild?

It's kind of a crazed thing with men. It's kind of crazy. We grow. Yeah. Yeah. You can see. Well, they have a reaction, too, but you can't just go like, thing with with men it's it's kind of crazy we grow yeah yeah it's some oh yeah that's it's you could see well they have a reaction too but you can't just go like hey miss i'm just checking to see if you like me just go to the front of her pants dry as a biscuit sorry but it's just right that's wild that that needs to happen in order to have sex and make babies it's wild that that

that thing needs to change because like some animals have like a bone there. They have like a penis. Yeah, like deers have a penis bone. Like a lot of animals have bones. Yeah, is there ever in the wild fucking where they can't get it up? I don't think so. I don't think they can survive that way. So I think they're hard all the time. They just poke it out. Or when it's necessary,

when it's needed. I don't think it's like I don't think a horse looks at like a mare and is like, mmm. Well, they definitely get horny when the other ones are in heat, right?

Yeah. But the thing is that they can hit it so quick because they have a bone. Yeah. They just pound in there and go.

Yeah, you ever seen, like Steve Rinella gave me one to stir coffee with. It's like a little. Dick bone? Dick bone, yeah. You have fun friends.

Different animals. How many different animals have dick bones? I already got me a record player once. We had that walrus one. Yeah, we had a walrus one. We still have that. We have a giant walrus dick bone. Oh, it's curved, too.

It couldn't even go in straight. Swims in you. That's a hard-ass thing, too, man. That's a heavy thing. That's how walruses fuck. I'm happy that chick is holding-ass thing too man. That's a Heavy thing that's how walrus is so happy that chick is holding it Just like a double-sided dildo yeah, you ever seen a whale's dick with carved whales. No preposterous I thought you'd room. Really? Oh, my God. I've never seen a whale's dick. I didn't realize that's hilarious. Wait, the walrus bone is used for doing what?

It's like clubbing something? No, getting that dick in there, son. This one is like penis-shaped. Oh, what, they use it as a club? Is that what it says? Baculum. Yeah, baculum is what the penis bone is. That's the technical name.

That's got to be weird when you're in your second coat of shellac on your walrus dick. Walrus dick club. How nuts is that? They have a bone in their body. But if you think about it, like if you've got a mate quick, predators are after you. You can't just, you've got a walrus? Like your odds of escaping sharks suck already. That's a whale's dick? Blue whale penis. so long it's so hairy because it's hairy deal with it it's got a violin end

i would imagine that where is it on their body where they can mount that's a good question i think they probably have to go under and like bang it from underneath it's gotta be from behind yeah they have to go underneath. They have to go like, I would imagine they have to go like this. Like, here's the girl, and the male goes, and gets under there, and goes like that. God, this is video of whales fucking. Gets under her, and they match it.

And they just smash it up. And it slides in there for a little bit. I think we all would have seen a picture of an upside-down whale. Yeah, fucking. I've never seen that. I've seen whales, they can go in the water and do all kinds of crazy shit. Is it coming from behind like a refueling jet? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I would say.

Underneath and upside down. Underneath. Yeah, there must be video. Maybe they know to both go down in the water and they do it together. Is it spraying semen in the water and it swims through it? No, no, no. That's how fish do it. These are mammals. So mammals have to breed and they give birth to their young, whereas

fish just jizz eggs. Don't worry, Ari. These whales are all about the cream pie. They're all about it. They're naturally cream pie animals. Oh, wow. Oh, that's what they do. Upside down. You're right. Okay, wow. Look at that.

That's it. She flips over and he's got to keep her in spot. Oh, it's what they do. Upside down. You're right. Okay, wow. Look at that. That's it. Whoa. And she flips over, and he's got to keep her in spot. Oh, it's a scramble, because they're both real horny, and they can't stay in position, because they don't have arms. Because they don't have arms. Yeah. Wow.

There he goes. Oh, it's it. Bam! It's it. Cha-pow! There you go. He's hitting it from the side. I pictured missionary.

Look at this. Giant whale dick. Oh, now they're married. There you go. Now they have babies. Now they're the happy couple. It's wild how smart those fucking things are. Those things are smart as shit.

You ever see them save a walrus they were fucking with when they trained their kids? Yeah, they'll save it if they don't really want to eat it. If one's not fully dead, they'll put it back. Yeah, if they don't want to eat it. They also know how to use ice shelves. So, like, one of them will get up to an ice shelf, and they'll tip it. Yeah. So that the thing slides to them.

So they get their massive body, and then they're just sliding towards death. They're just, they're super intelligent. I went whale watching once in South Africa, and then you pay all this money and no whales. They don't give you your money back. Sorry, man, no whale. If you want to see whales, Hawaii is a great place to see them. You'll always see them there.

Whenever the time is that they're there for breeding or whatever it is, why they're there. There's parts of the year. I think it's around November, if I remember correct, but I'm not sure if I do. I've been there a few times where I've seen them. It's amazing. You see them in the water splashing.

You can take a boat towards them. When I was in South Africa, we went to Seal Island, which is that only place where the sharks breach. Oh, whoa. To like jump and grab the seals. That was pretty wild. Really? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I haven't seen that.

It's pretty wild. Jimmy? Yeah, it's the only place where they, because the seals are all up on like this kind of, it's like barge almost, and they just jump out and grab them. Oh. In Alaska?

I love when they slide right at them. The only place in the world where they breach the sharks. I didn't even know sharks go to Alaska. Not Alaska, that was South Africa. Oh, South Africa. I thought you said Alaska. Not Alaska. That was South Africa. Oh, South Africa. I thought it was Alaska. That's how good this weed is. How close is it to legalizing here?

I don't know. Someone told me yesterday that there's something like... Look at these fucking monsters. They're so scary. Just beating it around. I mean, what is scarier than sharks? Just smashing things with their teeth. I saw a video of those guys fishing recently.

They had their fish right at the, I think it was a giant tuna, right at the edge of the boat. Yeah. And a great white just comes and steals it right at the last second. No, I haven't seen that. Yeah, they didn't jump off. Next, please. They had to go just jump backwards like, what the fuck?

Motherfucker, dude. Yeah. Those things are so goddamn terrifying. What a perfect eating machine. Rows of teeth. If one falls out, they get another one. Look at this. Holy fuck, dude.

Right there. My mother. Holy fuck. Right there. Wow. Look, this is amazing. He could have fallen over. He could have gotten dragged in. Yeah, right here, fuck. Right there. Wow. Look, this is amazing. He could have fallen over. He could have gotten dragged in.

Yeah, right here they had no idea. Yeah. This is amazing. Now they know. And he's like, Jesus Christ. That's a big one, too, man. Yeah, my mom, when I was younger, went on like a, her and one of her friends, like girlfriends, went to the Bahamas to go be young girls I guess and I went to go stay

with family in Florida and that night we went to go see in the theater Jaws 4 and my mom told me that day she was like this is like no cell phones or anything it's like house phone you call once a day and my mom was like oh we're getting ready to go on a banana boat today and do whatever

and it's going to be fun and then that night I went to go see Jaws 4 with my uncle and Jaws particularly I didn't know what a banana boat today and do whatever and it's going to be fun. And then that night I went to go see Jaws 4 with my uncle and Jaws particularly. I didn't know what a banana boat was when she said it. But in that movie there's a scene

where the banana boat and that's when he shows up to the Bahamas Jaws and eats everybody off of a banana boat. And I just cried the rest of the night. I was like nine.

Oh my God, that's awful. You couldn't get a hold. It wasn't like there's no where to call. Look how bad it looks. Oh my God, those movies awful. You couldn't get a horror. It wasn't like there's no recall. Look how bad it looks. Oh, my God. Those movies were so bad.

Like, once it got to Jaws 4, like, how nutty did it get? Do you remember the storyline? Yeah. Well, you go from one of the greatest horror movies of all time, Jaws 1. And by the time you get to Jaws 3D, it's a disaster. Jaws 2 was a stretch. Jaws 2 was wacky. He's just standing in place, the shark.

How many people were in Jaws 2? How many of the original people? You lost the captain because he died. Captain died. That guy was the shit. Roy Schreider, the wife. So Roy and the wife are back for two. It's like one of the younger guys because he was like, something happened to me last year.

It's so crazy how a good movie, like Roy Schreider in the first Jaws is amazing because it's a great movie. That old man was the best. But then by the time you get to the other Jaws, is he still amazing? Well, I also, I think,

I might be wrong about this, but I think Jaws, the idea is he took everything from this family because I think in part, does Roy Schreider die in part two? Does he? I don't know if he did. I think one of the, they have two kids. I think one dies in part two in the beginning in an attack.

And then the beginning of the revenge, the Bahamas one, I think it kills his other kid or bites his arm off. Imagine if sharks were like crows, where they recognize people that suck and they target them. Just tell you. Wow. That's what crows do. They see you suck in general? If you do something to crows, they'll fucking squawk when you come around.

If someone shot a crow with a BB gun or something like that and the crow saw it happen and the person was there with the crow, that person get like swooped on by other crows like when they go out the crows will like swoop on them and get in their face like vengeance yeah like trying to fuck with them you ever see the magpie swoop and uh is this two this is the end of two where they kill it with the power cable or some shit like that yeah get out go to the water your power you son of a bitch come on oh I thought this is the end of one oh that's right and it bites it and he throws the Get out, get out of the water Your power You son of a bitch Come on, you son of a bitch Oh, I thought this was the end of one Oh, that's right

And it bites it And he throws the cable in its mouth Come on, come on Your dad's crazy Here it is Oh my god Dad He has to look over

Come on He can hear that far Da-da! Dad! He has to look over. Come on! He can hear that far. Open the line! Stay up! I remember the way they show it. Oh my god, that's the worst special effects of all time. That's so stupid.

That is so stupid. And what a dumb strategy. What if the shark dives under that rope when he comes up his nose just knocks the thing out of your hands do you ever see the ones where the guys are in the shark cage and the car the shark goes through the bottom of the shark cage just destroys it just it was real recent almost got this guy's leg it's like literally goes through the bottom snatching its teeth like inches from this guy's leg. It's like literally goes through the bottom snatching its teeth like inches from this guy's leg.

You're fucking with dinosaurs. What are you doing? Those things have been around for a hundred million years plus. Those fucking things have been around forever. They survived the dinosaurs. They throw chum in the water

to get them to swim around. Bro. And then your legs could stick out of the bottom. Bro, those things are crazy. They're just feeding machines and swimmers. They can't even stop.

They stop and die. Guys like Steve-O and them put like steak in their pants and then jump in. Hook themselves by the chin. Yeah, hook themselves by the chin, jump in, and then accidentally like, remember that one? Look at this. He kicked him in the fucking face. Look at this. Look at this thing goes through the cage.

It's destroyed. He's got to get the fuck out now. Watch this again. Because they put him in a plexiglass cage for some reason. This is so insane that they did this. So insane. And look at that thing. So watch how it comes through the bottom.

Watch this. He thinks he's got something. Wow. Oh, Jesus. It was going for him, man. Yeah. It was going for him. It shattered it.

It was going for him and missed. That's all that was. Jeez. Look at its mouth open. Just smashed it right through the glass. It sees all that fish and thinks this is a big piece of fish that's just sitting there and no one's eating it. Wow.

So I'll just go eat that. And he gets out of the way just in time. Dude, look at that. Just in time. Almost the force pushed him up. Yeah. Like it wasn't even scurrying out of the way. Right.

It was the box breaking and kind of led him slightly to the side and he missed it. God damn. How did that guy survive? How did he get out of there? That is fucking insane. Look, yeah. Yeah, pull him out immediately. That's all those things do, just swim and eat, swim and eat.

Probably just a blank crunching noise in their brain. Probably no instincts at all. Don't care. No, this is good. Is there any evidence of fish being emotional in any way at all? No. Or is it pure? Just live their lives.

This lady said this once. She goes, I eat fish because they don't take care of their kids. I was like, it's true. She's like, yeah, if I need protein, I'll eat fish. I'm not connected to them. I was like, it's true. She's like, yeah, if I need protein, I'll eat fish. I'm not connected to them. I'm like, that's true. I get it. Like if you see like a mama deer taking care of her baby deers,

you're like, I get it. Kosher, you can eat anything. You have to kill everything a certain way except fish. You can eat alive if you want. You can just take a bite out of one. They don't care. So what if you do kosher would mean you would have to eat agriculture animals, right, because you couldn't hunt.

Right. For animals, except fish. But what would you do in a case of like an apocalypse? Would you stick with that? No. Danger. What would people do? Do you have like rules where you're allowed to get out of stuff?

Yeah, if you're going to die, you can do a lot of stuff. Okay. Yeah. You can't rape. Can you eat a person with cheese that's hilarious people eating cheese doesn't go together it's like oh that's the line that's that's our number one right like eating people when people eat people would we eat people well that's like the

Donner party type shit yeah each other stay alive and then they made it so you're on the other side you live but you live cuz you ate your friend yeah it was like yeah a lot of them are waiting for people to die and then eat them and I think some people probably just sacrificed themselves I think some of those people were like let's have a rule where nobody eats their own family. Oh, Jesus Christ. Could you imagine? Is there a circumstance that's not like a dire situation where you would try cooked human flesh in any way?

I'm not really interested in that. Yeah. No. It just doesn't seem like a road you want to go down. What if it's your favorite food? You find out. What if you eat it and you're like, holy shit. The perfect combo. Is this for real people people This is yeah fucking it is delicious the perfect combo of salty and sweet see the menu slow roast the movie the menu

Yeah, that was great great movie great movie. Yeah, it was a wild-ass movie like that's the kind of movie where they would serve you Human flesh mm-hmm. Oh yeah, well the re so that what we brought it up today on the way here He was saying him Bobby Kelly went to a The Copenhagen. It's kind of based on that. And it is. It's so up its own ass. It's hilarious. Where were you guys?

But they do everything great. Denmark. It's in Denmark? Oh, Copenhagen. He just closed. What's it called? Noma. Oh, that's the guy that just decided out of the blue to stop.

Second time. He's like the greatest chef in the world. Second time? First time he stopped, he won the best restaurant in the world like three out of four years and then he was like i'm out and then like a couple years later he came back and then he said like there's no way to do this like by paying everybody enough so he's like you can't make profits that way he goes you're right actually we'll just shut down wow yeah he's like i thought about it this is weird to take advantage of people financially and and then you can't operate otherwise.

What made it the best place? Like, things you would never combine ever? I told you, they used to peel walnuts. Yeah, but I mean- It was a 26-course meal. Experience things, for sure, but I'm saying, like, is it like a mixture of, like- They spared no expense. They didn't overload it with tables.

They, like, moved it out, so you had a great experience. 26 courses. They were like, we have a wine pairing menu, and I was like, okay. And Bobby's like, I'm an alcoholic. And they were like we have a wine pairing menu and I was like okay and Bobby's like I'm alcoholic and they go we got a juice pairing menu for you though and it's just like every everything was taken care of nice yeah it was like two and a half hours how much is it per person $500 that's actually not as bad as I thought though yeah very interesting they have professional chefs peeling walnuts so you don't get the little shells thing stuck in your teeth. Did you enjoy it as much as you enjoyed another really good restaurant?

Like, was it an added part of the experience to have all those courses? Yeah, yeah, yeah. It was an adventure. Fried moss. Ants to mimic citrus. How are the fries? Skin on? And you leave hungry.

That's what everybody says, and it's true. Hmm. What makes the best restaurant in the fries? Skin on? And you leave hungry. That's what everybody says, and it's true. What makes the best restaurant in the world? Oh, is that caviar in a whale stick? Reindeer brain jelly. Wow. What? Oh, everything's local. He started local.

Reindeer brain jelly. Nope. It's all good. No. No, it ain't. Interesting. But it's not very filling. Wait, what are they saying? Hang on there. Beetle made from berry hides and ain't. Interesting. But it's not very filling. Wait, what are they saying?

Hang on there. Beetle made from berry hides and black garlic. Wow, I didn't have that one. Oh, wow. Interesting. Flower pot. Rose-scented cake in the shape of a flower pot. Wow.

Wow. Come on. That's insane. Come on. You're showing off. That's insane. You're just showing off. Okay, duck brain. off. That's insane. You're just showing off. Okay. Duck brain.

Wow. Duck feet candies. Nope. Oh my God. No. What is that one? Nope. Is that chicken feet?

Yeah. Oh, duck feet. I can't get. Fudge. Fudge made from smoked duck fat. Wait, is that, is it just shaped like duck feet? I don't know. Yeah, it's just shaped like duck feet, but I mean that's real

That's insane. Yeah Wow So that's just a different kind of experience. It's all experiential. It's also not bad. It's good, but like it's for the adventure I'm fucking simple yeah, a line. Goodbye, medium rare. Give me a glass of wine. I'm fucking simple. Yeah. Me and Ari went to the blind place in Toronto once. What's that? Complete in the darkness.

What? Complete darkness. Blind waiters and waitresses. What? They lead you to behind a curtain, then another curtain, then another pitch black. They seat you down. They feel your way down. Absolute black. Is that what you ever do?

Au noir? Maybe. I did one in Vietnam once, and then we did this together. So how do you see where you're going? They lead you. They lead you. What if you have to pee?

You tell them and they'll lead you. They'll come back? They'll lead you to the bathroom. How do you know where you're pissing? How do you know when you're done wiping your ass? Maybe. I think they take you out to the lobby. You can't take a dump there.

What? Don't take a dump at a nice restaurant. What if you have to take a dump? You gonna hold it in to get a shit like that lady on OnlyFans? What are you gonna do? You're gonna have to take a dump. hold it in to get a shit like that lady on OnlyFans? True re you've shit in restaurants that are nice before yeah, you're right. I take it back I take it back. You'll have to shit in the dark. See you'd only not do it because it's a blind restaurant Right, that's the only thing and it regular restaurant Of course you take a shit right if you went to Noma and I was like I have to use the rest of shit

I'm not gonna enjoy this. Yeah, I'll beoma. And I was like, I have to use the restroom. I'm not going to enjoy this. I'll be back here. Otherwise I'm going to be holding my shit. 18 minutes. Isn't that why you have a toilet? So I can take a shit? Yeah. But not at that blind place. You'd be like, how do I know when I'm done wiping my ass? You have no idea. What if I accidentally shit in my pants? What if a little pinch of a

log? Maybe they give you light in the bathroom. Maybe they'll lead you to a place where you like to be. Maybe your underwear are destroyed and you have to take them off and smell them. You know? Every time you wipe, you gotta clap your cheeks and see if it makes a mucky noise.

And then maybe you find out where the sink is to wash your fucking hands. They have to have a sink there, too. You have to wash your hands. So then you have to take your underwear and put it in the sink. You smell your underwear and you don't like what you're smelling. You have to wash your hands. So then you have to take your underwear and put it in the sink. Maybe they go in there with you. You smell your underwear and you don't like what you're smelling.

You're pitch black. God damn it. Did I shit my pants? Then you can wash your underwear. Your wet underwear in that sink and hope you got it good. Try it off with paper towels. Why are you trying to save the underwear?

You don't have to worry about aesthetics you gotta worry about smell smell should be problem number one you're gonna need some soap on your underwear

cover it up with some dirt and then as you're leaving the blind people are gonna be like what the fuck were you doing in there man

and they can smell better than regular people so they know oh they know you thought you got it off but you didn't I thought what was weird was when we were eating

if me and Ari would stop talking for a minute like how zone like you can almost like Was like we're like robotically like zone in on Conversations coming from different like play, you know, I mean like listening to other people and you can really hear it like clearly Mm-hmm like but if you could shoot then you can almost go there's also someone behind talking you can like almost focus in it's very weird So you're eating with your hands or are you using forks? You get a fork and knife. Maybe just spoons.

No knife. They give you a knife. Full knife, spoons, yeah. Jesus Christ. There was once we were going to try each other's drink. So we're like, let's try this. Let's pass it. But it's like, you have no idea.

So you're just passing. I'm sliding mine over. I'm sliding. And you're going back and forth, waiting slowly to touch his hand. And I'm like, how am I not getting it? It's that dark. How am I not getting it? It's that dark. How am I not getting it? Pitch black.

And then he goes, how far up are you? I'm like, up? Why are you including up? First of all, it wasn't drinks. It was something on our forks. I wasn't even thinking of that I was doing that, because Ari is definitely down here trying to feel our hand touch. And I'm apparently just just like where's your face

up don't go up at all oh my god that's hilarious it was cool what a novel concept yeah you couldn't tell what you were eating you was just like guessing based on smelling but that's what i thought was interesting i was wrong on almost everything what they do is they they ask you if you want to know or if you want to know or if you want to be surprised. So I was like, we were both just surprised, and they ask you afterwards, what do you think that was? And I mean, like, it was like pork,

and they're like, chicken. Damn. Was that turkey? That was sausage. Everything was like nothing was right, and you're like, if you can't see, it's amazing how much it affected that. Well, none of that affects people that eat fake meat.

Where they think they're eating meat? Yeah. It makes it taste better? If you gave someone one of them fake meat burgers and didn't tell them, how much would they be able to tell? Because most of the time when people are eating a Beyond Meat burger, they know, right? Right. You do it on purpose.

But if you lied to them? Yeah, if you just gave it to them, how much would they know? Especially, they might just think it's a bland burger Yeah, especially if it's got like you put fucking all kinds of sauce and pickles Yeah, I had the the One from Burger King once the impossible Whopper was it it tastes Identical because you realize there's nothing to do with the meat anyway. It's the it's the way they stack that the mayo and whatever I had a quarter pounder like about a year ago

Like I've never eaten one of those and I pulled into I was fucking starving. I'm like, let's go come on Yeah, I would a quarter pounder and fries and I was amazing how sweet it tasted I'm like feels like there's sugar in this like do they put sugar in quarter pounders Oh gotta be God, but I was eating and I was like this is kind of like it was delicious first of all Yeah, but it was also it was like this is kind of like a pastry and a burger at the same time It was so sweet. It was good though. I mean Yeah, I get it It's no one's going like hmm, I learned to like it.

Nine grams of sugar. Nine grams of sugar. That seems like. How much is that next to a roll-up? I don't know what it's in. It could be in the bread. That's nothing compared to like a can of Coke. But it's sweet enough that I was noticing it because most of the time I'm like an in-and-out guy.

I like in-and-out with lettuce wraps. That's the best. It's just meat and cheese. Yeah, with Five Guys makes a mean lettuce wrap, too. Five Guys has the best, though. They're all coming around. Did Wendy's have lettuce wraps now? Five Guys has jalapenos. They have better fries.

Five Guys has those Cajun fries. Five Guys does? Mm-hmm. Skin on, though. Not my jam. I'll take it. Man man Ari's got an old Jewish bladder well it was me yesterday sometimes you just fuck up and you over hydrate yesterday I had a pee three fucking times in the first three hours just drank too much water my age is hitting me that I don't have to pee a

lot but when I have to pee we got to get there now yeah as long as it's just pee when I have to pee I have to go shit dude congratulations to go away in Ferrari that club is thank you

beautiful thanks thanks it's fun everything everybody said it was too which is the energy down here is good right now for comedy

well there's a lot of good people here and a lot of funny people that are actually working there which is fun, too. Well, you guys walked in. You guys, I think Rebecca's down here with the creek and everything.

And, like, it was weird. Like, you know, I'd come down here and do gigs before, like, you came down here. And with the scene changing, there was a little bit of, like, pushback in the beginning. I don't know if it was, like, if you got it on your plate at all but like it was funny like some of the comics in austin you'd be like hey it's like it's becoming a real scene down there and it's like yeah for like this batch of people but you know it's like it seemed like that caused a divide that i didn't know was um not even like uh like there was already that thing in new york i felt like you're always gonna have uh people when there's a lot of shows that only have four or five people,

like the Joe Rogan and Friends shows that I was doing at the Vulcan. The people that are just left out. There's not enough spots. That's part of the reason why we decided to do two open mic nights. So we have open mic night on Sunday and Monday. And then, obviously, there's Kill Tony, which is the cornerstone of the comedy scene because that's where the new people, a lot of times, that's Kill Tony, which is the cornerstone of the comedy scene because that's the new people. A lot of times that's where they get their first set and they're doing it live on fucking YouTube.

It's amazing. It's a great fucking fun show. It was awesome watching you guys on it. Smart to have an open mic right there. They're there for it anyway. Why make them waste their night if they don't get drawn? Exactly. This way, you got a chance to do the open mic.

You got a chance to do Kill Tony. There's another open mic on Sunday. It's like the way it's set up, it's set up to foster new talent too. It's not just set up to take care of existing talent. It's set up so that you create a nice comedy environment where people can go and see guys like Shane Gillis, nice comedy environment where people can go and see guys like Shane Gillis see guys like you guys go up see guys like Greg Fitzsimmons or you know Schultz was here last week. It was fucking amazing like it's they get to see these people coming to tell you

Dave Chappelle show up. Yeah, you know they're getting to see like the cream of the crop come in That's why she's the person the door for that reason to see better comics exactly because it's it's a massive part of the Education so to do we wanted to make sure that that was like a big part of what we were doing Do there's a make sure swarm of employees? Just like all comics. I assume or some level of it. Yeah, just taking care of everything Yeah, I think it's the branch out like if they have a set they can go punch out love that and come back Oh, really? Yeah, if you have a set across town to punch out. Like if they have a set, they can go punch out. Love that. And come back. Oh, really? Yeah, if you have a set across town, just punch out, come back.

That's awesome. Yeah, don't waste the night. Do a set. Yeah, the whole idea is that it's an environment for growing new people and for spreading comedy. A lot of comics, particularly in the beginning, they need something that they can believe in and count on. And you don't necessarily get that if someone's doing these pop-up shows here or there. You're like, how am I included in this? How can I get included in this? And the only way is you have to have open mics.

You have to have open mics. It's the only way. And then on top of open mics, you have to have little satellite rooms. There's got to be a way you can kind of branch out. got a room here He's got a room there and you make this you network with the other comics that are doing that and you put together a fucking Act, but you want to know that there's like what is what's the scene like what what's the community like? How many good comics around here? How can I learn from these people because if you're stuck in a place where you're the funniest guy in town, you're in some weird spot in the middle of nowhere,

you've got to get out of there, right? If you want to grow as a comic, you're not going to grow in a vacuum. You're not going to grow in a vacuum. But do you think, that's what I mean, because it used to be obviously always they'd push you to the coast, New York or L.A. That's kind of like over now. Do you think it's as like here in Nashville is the same difference at this point as far

as like what you're trying to get on stage? I don't know what's going on in Nashville. I mean, Nashville Zanies, which is a great club, has been around forever. It's one of the best in the country. But I don't know what the scene is other than Zanies. I don't know much either. There's a lot of clubs here now. It's bigger here.

It's a lot bigger here. Yeah. There's a lot of clubs here now. It's different. There It's a lot bigger here. There's a lot of clubs here now. It's different. There's a lot of world-class comedians that moved here. It's kind of different. And it's just Slick Clown. I just want to make it a great place for everybody.

Fun for what we love to do. That's what we loved the most about the store was the hang, the camaraderie. We were just always fucking around, always laughing, always having fun. It was already a fun hang. Yeah, and we also watch each other's sets. I like that new thing. We talk about a new bit. It's fun.

But I was at the best, like New York was the best gym is the way I would put it for comedy because of the availability of stage time. And you just kind of keep going up from like 3 p.m. if you wanted to until 2 o'clock in the morning. And I don't think that's even true at all anymore, that you need to be in that scene now at all. That's what I mean. You could really get full-on successful

and never leave your... Hometown? Hometown's the wrong thing, but I said there's just more avenues, I think, now. But you can get up three times, four times a night here. Absolutely. So you can get the spots now. You definitely can here,

especially in that one area. You've got the creek, Creek in the Cave, which is right there, right next to us. Then you've got Vulcan, which is also like half a block away from us. And then you have Red Band's room. Sunset Strip. What is it? Sunset Room? Sunset Strip.

Sunset Room? Sunset Strip. Sunset Strip. Sunset Strip Room. And that's right next to us. And that's 500 seats. Plus bar shows. Yeah.

And then there's plenty of shows. There's also the Velveeta room. Velveeta. I haven't been to that. Ron White says it's a place called the Green Room. That's a small spot that's right over there. So there's a lot of spots. And then you're always going to have the out of town stuff.

You're always going to have someone's doing a comedy show and dripping springs someone's doing a comedy show here There's a bar they're hiring comedians, but the industry is not leaving LA. That's what I wonder if it's gonna I think it would ever because look yeah sure if there's people here man the industry is kind of Podcasts for us the industry is podcasts the industry is podcasts and stand-up That's the industry for us like we think of the industry is like someone's gonna hire us to do something outside of doing stand-up. Yeah, right It's like which is like is that really what you're over? I'll say it's like it sounds like if you which I'm though don't know care about like auditioning for movies or TV stuff It's never been my deal anyway, if it is your deal. That's the place to be sure if that's what you're really it's all zoom

I'm that shit. You just have to find for the final meeting. Yeah, you're not wrong. Yeah, but you got to network. You want to make it as an actor. God, those sickening fucking networking parties. You have to go to those things. Still going on. If you're someone in the beginning, you want the casting people to like you, you want the executives to like you.

You're like, oh, that Jay's a charming guy. He's really fun. Yeah. You know, you go to these things and they'd like you because you'd hang out with them and talk shit industry laughter is the worst trying to have a good time wild literal vampires yep yep literal vampires sucking the youth out of like one new talent just but that's the nature of the gig the nature gig is you got to depend on other people to come up with stuff that you can get credit for.

That's the way that animal feeds. A hundred percent, dude. It's the nature of the gig. And, you know, you have enormous power when you're at a network, like deciding what does and doesn't get on the air. Everyone's going to like you. And it's all so weird. Like, you know, they have these weird sweetheart deals at production companies. At least they did in the sitcom days.

And so, like, a crappy show would be on right after Friends. It would be, like, number two in the ratings. And everybody was like, what the fuck? Because of the lead-in. Because of the lead-in. These are garbage shows. Shows that were just like, oh, Jesus Christ, there was a few of them. They also ran shows.

It was, like, in between Seinfeld and Friends and in between Seinfeld and friends in between Seinfeld and er Paul Sims from news radio Famously called it a shit sandwich It's like what it is. It's like they're sandwiching two good shows Seinfeld and friends So more the idea now of anything like that Abbott Elementary I've never seen it, but I've heard good things about it, and it's staying around that's popular It's a huge, but where does that happen anymore? Where a sitcom should be anyone's endgame anymore. I feel like if it's really good, people always love them.

If someone can come up with a really good, curb your enthusiasm, people always love them. They're always sunny. It was great. They always love them. They're just generally so fucking lame. But they're few and far between. And a lot of times, it's just like, it seems like, I feel like there's no learning from like the mistakes

and I don't know if always sometimes just throwing in like, Let's make you best friends with the X. Retro, like, but I mean that just like, you know what,

this guy was popular at this one point, throw him in another show. John Cryer. John Cryer. Two and a half men. Yeah. It's just a weird life, man.

It's a weird life. George Lopez is back. There was a George Lopez show. Then the other one's called, now it's called Lopez versus Lopez. It's like a lot of the same. You see a commercial for it at a bar sometimes, and it'll come on on mute, and you're just like, this looks like a sketch. It looks like they're playing a sketch of what a sitcom was. It used to be the thing you wanted.

Yeah. In the 90s when I came here i was like holy shit you're on a sitcom like yeah yeah but the real thing good one the real thing development deal or the real thing was having your own sitcom like everybody wanted their own sitcom and you meet these other people that have their own sitcom like whoa you know they're uber you got your own that's when you almost the sign for uh failure though is when the name everyone the seinfeld model people tried to use it. There was a Clegg horn.

Yeah. Yep. Costello. Sue Costello had her own thing. I remember when I was built around direct when I was on news radio. Tom Rhodes had the Tom Rhodes show. He's a teacher. NBC.

I was like, dude, you got your own show. This is crazy. Like I don't Tom from the clubs to see him like internationally from road show that's nuts That was before was that before after he did that talk show Overseas before well before and that ended and he went he got a job offer there, and he just loved the Amsterdam Yeah, stay he still took the long hair when he was oh yeah Tom Rhodes is in the running for coolest guy in comedy. Oh yeah.

We'd have to at least nominate him. What a life. What a life. He's an interesting guy too. You follow him on Instagram. He's always going to these interesting places. He does a lot of traveling, takes photos of it. I never think it's for comedy, but it always is. He's enjoying himself.

Yeah, it's always for comedy. That's wild. I'm going to Pont Yang. It's like, for what? You want to see some famous thing? That's smart though. Do shows. See things.

Book a gig. He had an album that was just bits about local places. Like a Shanghai bit and then a fucking Mongolia bit for in that town or in that place. And it was like 135 minutes. Can you imagine doing comedy for Mongolians and they get mad at you? You cross the line. Like, what? Oh, no.

They jump on archers on horseback coming at you. Bro, you're so fucked. You know how scary that would be? You piss off a dude with a fur hat. Don't piss off Mongols. Puts a dude with a fucking eagle. You get the Fu Manchus. He's got a falcon on his wrist.

Get him. Takes the mask off that fucking monster. Your shoulder pads of skulls. Imagine they turn the lights on that blind menu. That's what you get. No! It's all mongol. It's a horror.

They've been slicing human beings like a fucking ham. Slicing pieces and serving it to you. Jesus. The club is great, though, dude. Thank you. I'm really excited. I did a set in the other room, too. That was fun.

Got a good late night or vibe it's got um a good late night or vibe in the little room the big room is like a it's it's not like the main room but it's not like the or yeah it's kind of like the or on steroids it's just a larger or but it's very the sound it's like it's gonna it's a real honest room it's really good set up great feels like a balcony from on stage but it's very the sound it's like it's gonna it's a real honest room it's really good set up great feels like a balcony from on stage but it's not shout out to louis ck because he gave me some really good advice about like the setup he came while we're in the middle of construction we changed a couple of things because of his uh his advice i love that yeah we lowered the ceiling in the little room um we made the stage The stage was like four feet larger on each side.

He's like, why is it so big? I'm like, yeah, why is it so big? Let's go, chop it up. In the little room? Yeah, I just said, just tell me what you think and I'll do that. And so he's like, lower the ceiling to here, lower the ceiling to there.

And then the other room, like lower it even further in the other room, like okay, lower it. That's funny when someone gives you really expensive advice, he goes, say it and I'll do it. He goes, fuck, I'd get rid of this wall. Damn it. Move it two inches. Yeah.

He just told me what he thought. He was right. He was thinking about it. I was like, yeah, do it. He's like, do it right the first time. I'm like, yep. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Fix it before it opens.

Because I thought it would be okay the way it was, but it wouldn't be optimal. That's the point. You're doing all this construction. Why not make it optimal? It just required a lot more shit. A lot more stuff have to be in place but but i mean man it's just run so right yeah it's great it's awesome it just looks like a like it feels like a club you know like a real old like this one works club have you farmed out like the boss jobs enough that you don't feel like

you have to have weird things with people ever well there's weird things you're always gonna have weird things one of the the great things about that building is the building itself there's something about that building man that there's something about these old old old buildings i feel like they've got there's some memory in that building some abortions late night like when we start that's the story when we started like right away it was like jesus christ it feels like we've been here for like 10 years like everybody was kind of weirded out on their first set because it was just kind of crazy like oh my god we're doing it because we talked about doing it for two years so many years it was around the corner yeah well

you know what happened now you know the cult the cult so i just got in the way slithered out of that fucking deal and i had to get a new place. The building sank under a mound of cum. And that was after I'd already hired everybody. So I had to find another spot. Oh, so you changed places. Oh, yeah, it was going to be out of town. Yeah, the cult place. The cult place that we talked about earlier, that holy hell.

That was the original place. That's so funny. It's haunted by the ghost of cheek implants. Bro, haunted by all the sorrow of people who wasted 20 years doing that following a dude it was so sad at the end of the documentary when we see these people now regretting deeply their time years I gave my life to this man and all I got was butt fucked that's too much for a t-shirt read that in the beginning it was awesome. But it's always the thing.

Just like the government. 1776, in the beginning, it was awesome. It was awesome. You had your Second Amendment. You had your First Amendment. But even like the Charles Mansons, as his mind went since he was the leader, they would have went every direction he wanted to go. If he goes every day, we're going to go out and give flowers to people

and tell them, like, put a smile on your face. But he just started going like, nah, race war. Do you know about that? Do you know the whole story of the Manson story? You should read this book called Chaos from Tom O'Neill. It's Greg Fitzsimmons' neighbor. You know that story? He wrote a book about Manson and the CIA.

Like Manson was like literally trained in LSD. They visited him. This guy, Jolly West, visited him in jail. He was a part of a program they were doing. They dosed him up with acid and then gave him acid to seduce these hippies and taught him strategies for like don't do acid but tell them you did. Then they do it and this is how you control them. He had guided help throughout his time because they were trying to discredit the hippie movement and the anti-war movement

and they were trying to see if they could get a guy to convince hippies to be murderers. Oh, to make them fear hippies? He got arrested. He was on parole. He got arrested multiple times. And when he got arrested, they would always let him go and they would always say, we found out he was above our pay grade. So they were making this is documented in this book called Chaos. got to read this book because this is not like

wild assertions this is a guy who went on this like rabbit hole for 20 years and he uncovered all the evidence about the case and he's like there's real evidence that this mk ultra operation mk ultra mind control shit that manson was a part of that. Really? They were helping him. Where did he get all this acid? He was getting this acid, giving it to these kids. How does he know how to control these people and get them to do things? They taught him how to do it in prison.

They were never in their right mind. That's true. There was never a clear mind in the place. Everyone was burned out. He programmed these people while they were high on acid and got them to kill people. Wow, it worked. He got really vulnerable, very gullllible people you dose them up with acid

I hate your garbage, man Next thing you know you're fucking stabbing people you feel like they're pigs the guy When he did I don't know if it was a Diane sort the one of the ones he did in jail Yeah, and then when it cuts to at one point they go I went on to ask a few more questions that uh he just did whatever and it's kind of like montages him like pointing crazy and then doing like karate like elvis karate at one point he must have been on such a fun level well didn't he there was a thing in the book where he threatened one of the uh beach boys because he wanted to be a musician right you Beach Boys because he wanted to be a musician.

Right, you remember that? Yeah, he wanted to be a musician, it didn't work out for him, so he was trying to kill one of the fucking Beach Boys. I think it was Brian Wilson. To replace him or he was just talking about? To punish him. No, so it was the Beach Boys,

it was Brian Wilson's brother, what are the other Wilson, whatever the Wilson it was, I believe. What did he accuse him of? So I think he just loved getting his drugs and pussy that he would bring around. Who would bring around? Charles Manson. Manson would bring around these chicks and whatever, and they'd party with the guys. And then, you know, I think he gave them like a... I think he brought one of his songs to the Beach Boys and they recorded it.

I think the Beach Boys recorded a song written, co-written at least. Yeah. Learn Never to Love was written by Charles Manson. Yeah. If you've ever heard this fact before without any details, you might think that Manson had some kind of career in the music industry before he went weird. Those murders meant he was connected with a bunch of stars in Los Angeles, right?

But this connection was more than professional. For a while, beach boy Dennis Wilson was actually sharing a house with the Manson family once Manson had already become a cult leader. By a house, we mean Wilson's own house. The family moved in, took over, and Wilson had to flee and abandon all his belongings to escape the family's clutches.

Holy shit. It all started in April 1968 when Wilson picked up a couple of hitchhiking women. Have you ever seen Once Upon a Time in Hollywood? Picture that scene where Brad Pitt's character picks up a Manson follower played by Margaret Qualley. The women of the family use this tactic repeatedly to lure in new followers.

The two hitchhikers offered to come to Wilson's place. Wilson didn't realize they'd take up residence following the one-night stand or that their guru, Charles, and his other followers would move in as well. Holy shit. Read the next paragraph. Margaret Qualley, also Pete Davidson's notch list. God bless him, dude.

Fellow beach boy Brian Wilson would later describe coming to dinner at Dennis' place and seeing him with Manson and a bunch of Manson girls all naked and LSD orgy followed dinner. And when he declined to take part and just went for a shower, a naked Charles tried to join him there and warned him that leaving the group was not an option. Wow. You're fucking us. Oh my God. Leaving the group was not an option. No showers. You're fucking us. Oh, my God. Leaving the group was not an option. No showers. You're fucking us. Oh, my God. Yeah.

And then the first thing. Imagine Charles Manson in your house with a boner telling you it's time to fuck. Get down here. This is not an option. Come on. It's not an option. Yeah, but what it was, I think like. Hold on. Hold on. Look at this. Brian got the hell out of the house that night, but Dennis stayed was, I think like... Hold on, hold on, hold on.

Brian got the hell out of the house that night, but Dennis stayed behind, of course, and for a while he seemed trapped. The family occupied his home for months, racking up close to a million dollars in expenses in today's money, including a large amount just on STD treatments. Dennis publicly spoke highly of Vance

and said he was happy that the family were relieving him of the burden of wealth which sounds truly like something only a cult member would say they were relieving him of the burden you could just give it away wow and then the guy was

the reason he ended up at Sharon Tate's was I guess it was the producer that I think that Dennis guy was eventually like okay man I'll try to get you like a record deal and took it to whoever this producer was and the producer was like not interested I think he dentist guy was eventually like, okay, man, I'll try to get you a record deal. And took it to whoever this producer was. And the producer was like, not interested. I think he was like, not interested. And then moved the next day.

Oh, my God. And so they went to the wrong house. Yeah, he wasn't there to kill Sharon Tate. Jesus Christ. And they just killed everybody in the house. That's so spooky. Wow. He was like, kill whoever is.

Oh, no. Yeah, that was them. That was the Sharon Tate one. Kill everybody in the house. Sharon Tate was a new house. Yeah. Tex Watson The Sharon Tate one was killed. That was Tex Watson. It was a new house, yeah. Tex Watson was the guy who killed most of the people, right? And then there was Squeaky Fromm who tried to kill Nixon.

Yeah, I think. No, no, Ford. She tried to kill Ford, right? Isn't she one of the ones you can like see her talk now and she's like, yeah, that was a weird decade, huh? Some of them are so like. Really? Yeah, I think some of them are so like.

Really just got it back now? Well, I know that she kept going up for parole, and then I'm like, nah, player. You're a little too wild. Stay the fuck in there. There's old ladies now. It's so funny. They're like, yeah. You know.

Yeah, Gerald Ford. It's the 60s, man. She tried to kill Gerald Ford in 75. See if you can find a video of her talking. Oh, wow. Look. Wow. Not bad. Squeaky front. Oh, wow. Look. Wow. Not bad.

Squeaky front. Oh, she's young. Oh, man. But that's the thing, man, with these LSD cults. Like, what they were doing was orchestrated. Like, they were trying to figure out what was possible with LSD. You think they tried to make it? And the best way to figure that out was to get someone to do it on a bunch of hippies and that

way you could discredit the movement at the same time you could also find out what strategies you can employ to get people to follow you and can you get people to murder people right if you if you do this correctly a nice tactic you also get it up to fuck those dumpy broads you are yeah squeaky frump there's real evidence in this book that they ran a clinic in Haight-Ashbury in San Francisco Dosing people we know they were dosing people at at both of us. Yeah, right. They did it at brothels They did this operation midnight climax So these guys would go into these whore houses Try to have sex with the lady the lady would give them a drink and the drink would have acid in it and they'd be tripping balls through a two-way mirror

Wow and they would study these guys that's what's this is squeaky from this is her talking that's not her is no the first one I think was in here yeah I thought, well, maybe I'll bring a gun. And then I said to myself, are you going to shoot him? And I said, I'm going to go see what's necessary. So I had all these thoughts about what I wanted to accomplish, and I just put the gun out and stuck it in there, and there was no bullet in the chamber. A boondorf, a Secret Service agent, grabbed it,

and an interesting thing happened. A guy... You see what I mean, though? ...high on marijuana... He was wearing a yellow suit and when they had me on the ground and I was telling him it's okay, it's okay, it didn't go up, it's okay. The guy walked over and he picked up my hand and I was so relaxed. Then he was talking to me

and the Secret Service agent said, who are you? He was the guy with the beard. I always wanted to talk to him afterward. Whoa. They're like, yeah, well, what is everyone saying? Is that lady out of

jail or did they film this in jail like that, which is really creepy if they did. I think she's out of jail. She must be out of jail. I'm saying out of jail. She must be out of jail. There's no way. If they wanted to do it in jail, they would make it look like you're in jail.

Yeah. That's part of the fun. I would make it look not in jail. Jailhouse interview. They really did go against the law. 100%. Jail clothes. So much more fun.

Yeah. You want jail clothes. They were against all of the ideas of hippies, though. But wasn't that also sort of the thing? They were supposed to be setting people up, right? They were going to go do violent crimes to blame black people to start the war. Yeah, Charles thought he was going to start a race war. But there's a lot of what they were doing was orchestrated by him giving these people acid and

telling them what to do and then him not doing acid and he was like guiding them it's really creepy it's almost wish that before he died he would have told the story of like how all that happened so he was like you're not gonna make me make them do this thing i'll just not take the acid then i'll make them do whatever I want. Yeah, he would, look, first of all, like those killings, he wasn't involved in those, but he might have killed some people. There's some evidence that he probably killed someone somewhere along the line.

And then there was, you know, these people that were just lost kids. Lost kids and getting dosed up with acid by like the lifetime criminal. A guy who was a con man his whole life working in conjunction with the cia if that's true that is a fucking wild thing that happened yeah and that they did it to try to stop the anti-war movement and stop the hippie movement but we know they did certain things like that like i had rick doblin from maps on the other day

and he was explaining how the sweeping Schedule I Act of 1970, a lot of it was designed to stop protests and to stop the Black Panthers and to stop all these other people that were doing all these different things, like the anti-war people, because then they could arrest them. They could arrest them for pot. They could arrest them for mushrooms. They could arrest them, and this is Schedule I shit now. You're all fucked.

All the people that thought it was okay to take acid Nope now you're going to jail and they could just round up everybody with these new Say hey, they want assets and people like okay We'll scatter to like how committed are you to the cause if everybody's getting locked up by the government you get the fuck out of town You abandoned ship and start a real job a lot of people probably bailed on it. Oh, that's probably wanted to do many Uncredited Manson family members. And they do. They pop up in documentaries. They go, yeah, you can see me in the back of one picture.

My name's Cliff. There's just some guy. We had a lot of family members. Yeah, that's what I'm saying. There's just some other guy who wasn't there that night. He goes, no, I was back at the place getting some pussy from this new girl. I heard they went out and killed somebody. That's pretty nuts.

Yeah, right. What a crazy time. Yeah, right. But you got out. What a crazy time too, right? Because you're relying on newspapers, right? That's where you're getting your information from. And, you know,

there's a little briefing on the five o'clock news. Nobody knows what the fuck is going on. You're hearing word of mouth, right? And you find out that these people

are getting murdered in the Hollywood Hills by hippies. You're like, what? We got to get rid of these hippies. What're like what we got everybody's hippies what exactly? It's so scary. They're doing ass in the murder people It's a perfect plan if you really can get a guy like Manson and convince him that he's got to do this for you And that's why he's free like we have you you're free like he gets arrested they get him out look you owe me you piece

Of shit you understand me like and then get him to do these things Get him to commit crimes get him to murder people get him to What's there they were after that Polish artist right? Wojciech Wieckowski, yeah for what wasn't weren't they trying to kill him the man so was yeah, or was he like Accidentally at the house, but he got murdered too in that in the Sharon Tate house Yeah, yeah, everyone in there was it was just like a kill whoever was there Indiscriminately at the house, but he got murdered too in that in the Sharon Tate house. Yeah Yeah, everyone in there was it was just like a kill whoever was there I think Manson found out when they went home that it was like hey that producer guy you're pissed off wasn't there

I'm gonna turn it he just moved. Oh, that's right. That's right So was it was he trying that murder was that murder was pissing off? About saying the guy who was like I'm not interested in your music I don't care And then he wasn't even there. It would seem like it was Dennis Wilson brought him to it's like okay fine Like you know that's you're hooking me up so much like here's a producer and when the producer was like not interested I think he got mad at Dennis Wilson and Dennis Wilson was like like only like bring you to the guy No, and like and then so his thing was to have them go kill him that night and his family Dennis Wilson was like, I can only bring you to the guy. And so his thing was to have them go kill him that night and his family.

Dennis Wilson? No, the producer. And he was just in an Airbnb. The producer just happened to move. Wow. Oh, my God. They caught him on a day that he was moving, or his address was listed wrong or something. It was just like...

Right. I think you rented the house out, right? Or something like that? Yeah, because they just moved in and Roman Polanski was off doing whatever. Fuck. Doing whatever. They said that's what killed the 60s,

the spirit of the 60s. That was it. There was a lot of those things that happened, but it was very orchestrated. The fact that they were able to make everything Schedule 1, we still have those things Schedule 1. Oh, it's so annoying. It's so long later. It's 50 years years later and those things are still schedule one it doesn't make any sense

also 60s so much young deaf in like or important to people like in society at the time so like right the 27 club and all those people kind of going down like that killed the spirit of the 60s too you know i mean like everyone was just gone like oh i guess this lifestyle is not good yeah you're like like this is a fun life of taking drugs and getting you know acid and it's like oh everyone's fucking dying they're fucking killing beetles yeah they're killing the beetles yeah then when did they kill john that was 80 though that was in it was in the 80s. It was late. It was 1980 Right outside his apartment building right outside. Jesus Christ. She still lives there. Jesus Christ. They wiped out move. Yeah, I'm a move That's other she still lives there. I think so. Maybe just sold it. Maybe that was like a clever real estate ploy

Yeah, it's worth more now, you know like American Psycho style everyone the American Psycho He goes back to that. It was in the book, too. It's even more graphic. But he goes back to one of his apartments where he left a body, and it's missing. It's all cleaned up. It's all cleaned up, and the real estate agent's looking at him very funny. Uh-huh.

So what are you doing here? What does it say? She still lives in the apartment building along with her and her son, Sean. Wow. She lives with her. It's probably dope. Sean Lennon's like 45 years old now. Yeah.

Probably a dope apartment. I don't see Elizabeth's mom. Maybe they enjoy it. Is that okay, Ari? It's not, is what I'm saying. Chibi doesn't like bringing girls home. I have to imagine he breastfeeds still. Maybe.

Maybe. He's like the chubby DJ one, right? Is that the world record? We didn't know it. All this time, that's what's been going on. I love those ones. I love those. He's been going for the Guinness Book.

Of longest breast feedings. What is the Guinness Book of longest time breast feeding? Not an individual session, but when did you stop? Keep it going. Stop lactating. Because it's weird when you hear about kids that are five. You're like, what? Mommy.

Boop. What happened? He's how old? If they keep sucking sucking it will eventually It won't stop on its own. I'll keep going. I think it'll keep going I would imagine it would probably help keep it going eventually your body be like bitch you had a baby five years ago Like what are we doing? Anything legal that can get involved if your

mother when you were 17 was like he still drinks from the till you get arrested is that sexual at that point you say this is just this is not sexual at all they broke breastfeeding records breastfeed their children are 13 shut the fuck up mitzvah. Until their children are 13. Wow. Until their children are teenagers. They can do crossovers. That seems a little insane. 12-year-olds are pretty fucking smart. They know that's weird.

Hey, Mom, I'm getting ready to learn my bar mitzvah haftorah. Oh, the kid's going through puberty. Look at this. Her son, Mason, is already going through puberty. But for this duo, there's no reason to end their breastfeeding relationship. They have had many occasions where people have said things to them or gave them dirty looks. Was he sucking on her tit at the airport? It's going to be odd.

It's going to be odd for people. Her son, we're in line at a movie theater waiting to purchase their tickets and decided it was time for a breastfeeding session. That's just showing off. Holy shit. That's showing off. That's big d off. Holy shit. That's showing off. That's big dicking. Come on, go to the bathroom. It is not surprising that people found it to be a little awkward.

The ticket clerk shouted at her from behind the desk. Oh, my God. To them, her no. Oh, to them, her no. I don't know what they spelled wrong. That she needed to stop doing that Mullen became angry because of his comment and told him I am a mother and I have every right to feed my child in public love it more lots of

women are afraid to breastfeed in public now because that's the same thing oh my god I love it what a kid oh my god so. Oh, my God. That's so weird. Wait in line for Star Wars. If I saw a lady and a 13-year-old boy going into one of those pods at the airport to breastfeed, I'd rather find out he's fucking her. Yeah. For sure. I would be less disturbed than if it was his mom and he's sucking on his mom's tit. Right? Yeah.

That's the Oedipus thing. How do you go to school? That's homeschooling for sure. You can't go to school and you're going to get a boner at that age. That's one of the weirdest things that a mother's son, you know in bonobos, bonobos fuck everybody. Everybody fucks everybody. But the mothers won't fuck their sons. Interesting.

Everyone's got a line. Everybody fucks everybody. Dads fuck all their kids. They fuck their brother. They fuck their sister. They fuck everybody. But the mother's like, get. Everybody fucks everybody. Dads fuck all their kids. They fuck their brother. They fuck their sister. They fuck everybody. But the mother's like, get the fuck away from me. Interesting. The aristocrats.

Shall we? Let's wrap this up. Yeah. Jay, congratulations on your special. You're fucking hilarious. I'm very excited to work with you tonight. We're going to have a good time. Oh, yeah.

Ari, we're going to have a good fucking time. Doing my storytelling show tonight? Yes, sir. That's going Yeah. Yeah. All right. We're gonna have a good fucking do my storytelling show tonight Yes, sir Fuck yeah, right. All right Anything else to plug other than the specials on YouTube? It's available right now Such big J. Oh, cuz it's my first production credit for the fuck. Did you just say what those words they flew to you? I don't even remember YouTube.com slash big J. Oh there you go there we go slow down

look at that you look beautiful up there yeah Ari's Ari jumped in man it was pretty amazing he helped so much so I hope he's proud of it I am very proud of it

you killed it was great and yeah I'm excited for y'all to see it man please tell friends share it beautiful

comment thank you so much my pleasure brother bye