The Joe Rogan Experience - #2005 - Tom Segura

Episode Date: July 4, 2023

Tom Segura is a stand-up comic, actor, podcaster, and author. He co-hosts two podcasts, "Your Mom's House," with his wife, comic Christina Pazsitsky, and "Two Bears, One Cave," with comic Bert Kreischer. He's also the host of his own podcast, "Tom Segura en Español," and is the author of "I'd Like to Play Alone, Please: Essays." His new comedy special, "Tom Segura: Sledgehammer," premieres July 4 on Netflix. www.tomsegura.com

The Joe Rogan Experience. Showing by day, Joe Rogan Podcast by night, all day. Yeehaw. What's up, Tommy? What's up, my man? How are you, my brother? What's cracking? I'm super stoked, man. Thanks for having me. Looking good. Looking lean. You fucking stuck with it, man. You fucking stuck with it. Tried to. Yeah, I've been working hard at it, actually. It stuck with it try to yeah i've been working

hard at it actually it's crazy i mean you so you've been so consistent it's amazing isn't it weird how that works that's what uh that's what i've said that to a few people and they're like yeah that's that's what happened i mean i don't know i just keep i think i had this um i don't know if i told you like this mentality before where I would go, if I got to a number on the scale, I thought of it as like a finish line. I didn't realize I was doing it, but I was. I was going, oh, I got there. Right. And then you just kind of go, well, if you're done, you're done.

Yeah. And then you just kind of regress. So I just realized now that it's just, it is, it is every day. It is life. It's life. It's part of life. Yeah. Yeah. If you can think about it that way. Also, you got to think about it like delayed gratitude. Delayed gratitude is a very important concept if you want to have a happy life. You can't just have gratitude in front of your face all the time. You'll just be a mess.

You want delayed gratitude and specifically for your physical health, because you don't feel good in the end of the day. Like, unless you've... When I don't work out, if I have a day that I blow it off, which is rare, but it does happen. Yeah. If I blow it off,

at the end of the day, I feel like a loser. Yeah. I know that's stupid. I know it's stupid, but it's that feeling inside of you that you didn't get ahead. Yeah. You didn't...

It's one thing if it's, like, I need a you didn't get ahead. You didn't, you didn't. It's one thing if it's like I need a rest day. Rest days, I love them. Let me watch TV or watch a movie. Sure. I indulge in those too. And you got to listen to your body on that for sure. And also your mind. Yeah.

I think your mind needs rest days. Yeah. I enjoy a rest day now. Really, I fucking. But if you don't do the things you know you're supposed to do you have that fucking nagging thing in your head and that thing in your head that nagging thing that's hours and hours and hours and hours and hours of your day yeah whereas the workout you could just get 20 minutes in yeah and that that feeling's gone totally just get 20 minutes in there's the there's the i feel like a

loser thing that also but there's also this even like another layer to it Where on days when I don't do anything physical and it's like it's towards the end of the day I kind of go like what's wrong with me? Yeah, and like other like Christina might be like what's going on with you? Mm-hmm And then sometimes it takes me a moment and I'll be like I didn't work out today. Yep. That's what it is. Oh, I go, yeah. So I have like this. Mental health.

Yeah. It's fucking with my head. I also have this, like the anxiety has manifested itself physically. So I just have this like, oh, I didn't exert myself. So it's all together. And I go, that's what it is. So I go, tomorrow morning I just got to get it in right away yeah it's just one of those things like brushing your teeth you got to fucking do it

you don't want to do it you do it then you feel better afterwards like in little bursts of that so I feel every time I get in that stupid cold plunge every time I want to do it every time I do it I don't want to do it always sucks sucks it never feels good we had this thing where we were doing we had to bank episodes of our podcasts. So that means we were going into the studio at like, I don't know, nine or 10 and then just spending the day there. Right. And I knew that when I got home, I'd be wiped. And we got, you know, we got the kids and we got to do dinner and get them ready for it. So I was like, I'm just going to get up.

And so every day I just got up a little earlier. Cold plunge first. So it's like that was my one cough it's the first thing i did which right the fuck right the fuck up and then right to the gym and so that i would i would arrive at the studio in the best mood yeah just like really in a great mood yeah and then i would zip through the day and I mean even they were like wow you're like nice Dude it's like if you could take that in a pill form it would be the most popular pill in the world 100% No question. Yeah. Yeah, and we're not talking about like being a bodybuilder not talking about killing No, just getting your heart pumping getting getting your sweat going, get those muscles moving, exert yourself. Yeah. I can get a fucking pretty good workout in 20 minutes.

You can definitely get your heart going. Yeah. If I'm fucking super pressed for time. You know what's crazy is when I work out right after cold plunging, sometimes you're like, wait, how come I'm not sweating? And you don't realize that your core temperature has dropped like 17 degrees. And you're like, oh. You're at 34 degrees for three minutes. Yeah.

What the fuck? Duh. I work out outside after I do that. Oh, nice. So I do the series of 100 body weight squats and 100 push-ups every morning. And the way I do it is I do it as my warm-up now. It's a good warm-up to do right after you get out of the cold plunge. So by the time I'm done with those, I'm warmed up.

Wow. Yeah. But it's nice to do outside. Yeah, that is cool. It's one of the only times that I really don't mind heat, like real heat, is during workouts. Yeah. I like working out in heat. It's good for you.

I do not like a cold gym. No. When the air conditioning is blasting in a gym. I don't like that. No, I don't like that either. I like, you know, Cronk Gym

where Tommy Hearns used to train? They always kept the temperature very high. They did? Yeah, they kept it like 95 degrees. Yeah, in Detroit.

And the reason, well, Manuel Stewart was a genius, boxing genius, but also a genius physically. He knew. It's just like working out in a sauna.

Like the sauna actually gives you cardiovascular benefit just sitting there because your heart's beating faster because it's trying to, body's trying to cool you off. Right. You're hot as fuck. You know, I've, I've had the heart strap on in the sauna and got up to 147 degrees or excuse me, 147 beats per minute. Just sitting there. Yeah. Just sitting there. Just sitting there. Yeah. What's happening? Especially because you do it in after a workout. Yeah. So I there. Yeah, your body's like, what's happening? Especially because you do it after a workout. Yeah.

So I'm already fucking exhausted. And then I get in that oven for 20 minutes. And at the end of that 20 minutes, my heart is jacked. So you're getting static cardio just sitting there. Just sitting there. So if you're doing a boxing workout and it's 95 degrees, your heart is jacked. Yeah. You're getting really worked out. That's hard.

It's like running with weights on. Yeah. And then imagine that feeling right after that, like when you're done. Yeah, like, ah. The relief. Like a hot yoga class. Remember when we were doing hot yoga? How many did we do?

15 in a month? We did 15. Yeah. That was nice, dude. That was nice. Yeah. Something about leaving those. I went to one here in Austin.

Yeah? Yeah. I went to a hot yoga class, and it was like, you just walk outside, and you're like, this isn't any different. This is the exact same temperature. Yeah, it's just yoga with no AC on. God. Yeah. But you do feel this.

And then the way that a cold drink tastes right after that, it's unreal. Yeah, just water. Yeah, just water. Just the cold water is so good. Yeah. It just feels so good. Do you take electrolytes? I do, every day. Yeah, just water. Just the cold water is so good. It just feels so good. Do you take electrolytes? I do, every day.

Yeah. I travel with the packets and everything. Which ones are you taking? I have liquid IV. Yeah. I take those pouches with me everywhere. Yeah, I take those too. Yeah, and I also take them, I have a big one before bed.

I fill up like a big canteen. Yeah. Do you have to get up to piss in the middle of the night? Yes. That's annoying. It's annoying. Not too, too much. I mean, I don't do it like right before bed,

but like I have an evening one because I remembered even from like high school football in Florida that they would go, if you're cramping, it's too late to start. Like you start taking, it's not going to help you then. It's all about like the prep for it. Right. So like you, that day before you exert yourself, electrolyte boost is what's going to help you more.

So I always try to do it like at night too. That makes sense. Just keeping a steady state in your body. Yeah. Yeah, it should be something that you take every day. But the big thing, dude, like I never hated. I wasn't one of those people who was like I hate the gym or I hate working out. It really is being consistent with food, too.

That's a big thing. I didn't realize how much I – well, I knew I was eating poorly a lot. I just had no sense of portion control. What turned it around? Was it those contests? Was it the weight loss contest? I guess it's a little bit of everything i think actually getting severely injured and and like just being like first of all i think hearing people being like oh you're really gonna fall apart now like now that you're

right you've been injured you're gonna be a mess you're gonna gain like a hundred pounds like people would say that who said that you you bert actually his wife his wife said it too jesus christ but she was just like in the moment saying it but no she wasn't you're gonna gain 100 pounds she was like you're gonna get real fat you're gonna be fatter than my husband yeah we're gonna make fun of you like that's impossible so but it wasn't even just that you know it was like other people too other people like oh yeah i, oh, yeah. I mean, I would see it. Like when I open up Twitter or something, they're like, this dude's about to be a fucking whale. Like, you know?

Wow. Yeah, because they saw you like, well, you're laying in a bed. Right. You know? So I think that kind of started it. And then what happened was my PT was, you know, we were doing all the rehab stuff. And she was the one who was like, are people telling you you're going to get way out of shape? She goes, yeah.

She goes, you know it's going to be the opposite, right? And I was like, what? She goes, you're going to be in the best shape of your life. And I was like, why? She's like, because you're going to be so focused on rehab. And you're going to feel better doing it. And you're just going to want to get. She was the one who, Dr. Karen Joubert.

So we have to break Bert's arm. We have to break multiple limbs. We got to fuck him. We should hit him with a bus. Do you remember the moment of reflection after this last Sober October? We're all out there. We were all going to go do a show. And I said, come do the show with us.

And Bert was like, I can't go out. If I go out, I'm going to drink. And I don't want to drink. I'm really going to get my shit together now. Do you remember that? No, I don't actually.. If I go out, I'm going to drink. And I don't want to drink. I'm really going to get my shit together now. Do you remember that? No, I don't, actually. Where were we here? You might not have been there.

You might not have been why he was saying it. We were right out in front. Oh, because I left a few minutes before, remember? Yeah, that's right. I was like, I got to go put the kids down. Yeah, I was trying to get him to come to the show with us. And he didn't want to do it. Yeah.

You know? He's just like, he likes the party. Hey, the party's great. But I think he partied during October when we had sober October and I still think he had a great fucking time I saw his shows. I thought he was killing it. Yeah, you know, I mean it doesn't Doesn't make it more of a party to get fucked up every night It's just unsustainable That's what I worry about, you know,, when we first did the sober October thing,

that was part of the discussion. We were all like, hey, Burt drinks too much. Yeah. Like, and I smoke too much weed. Let's try to work this out. Yeah. Yeah. Turns out smoking too much weed is like way better for you.

I think it is. He's on a bender right now too Store he's sure he's just grow. He looks like a moon pie a moon pie with a beard He's This Roger that Joey Diaz line where he I go you seen bird he goes. Oh, he's so fat those Chinese guys I go, you've seen Birdie? He goes, oh, he's so fat, I thought he was a Chinese guy. I just watched that.

He's having a good time, though. He is having a good time. I'm very happy for him, too. I'm happy for the movie and these arenas. That festival is a huge success. Watching him do his shows in these arenas and seeing these crowds, I'm like, wow. Yeah. It's pretty wild. It's pretty wild, dude.

It is pretty wild. You know, and you go back to him taking that chance and leaving the Travel Channel. Yeah. It was a big risk on his part, actually. Because that's the equivalent of, because we all knew comics like this. And it's just the reality of what it is. When you start working as a comedian and you have your circle of friends, there's a number of them who like as you start to do road gigs, and these are low paying.

I'm not saying you're not a ticket seller. You're just doing these gigs. And you're like, are you going to do some of these gigs? And they're like, nah, like I have this job. And the job provides the consistency and the comfort. It's reliable. They're like, oh, I'll get my paycheck. Yeah.

And then what happens is you doing these low, like they're making more money than you, right? Because you're doing like the bullshit comic. But then like your comedy starts to get better because you're doing standup all the time. And then you get more opportunities. And then they go like, hey, I want to do that. But like five years have gone by.

Right. And you're like, yeah, but you've been in this day job. Yes. Right? And then all of a sudden, you know, you're getting opportunities to do TV specials or like comics. They want you to just grab their hand. Yeah, yeah.

And take them with you on the road. What happened? You're like, well, you didn't take the leap. Yeah. And Bert kind of had that comfort of that TV show. Yeah. It's a good check. It's not like, it's not a bullshit check.

It's a good living. It's on TV. Yeah. But when he decided, no, no, I got to go make a full leap, that's a leap. Yeah. That's a leap. And then it paid off, obviously, tremendously. Yeah.

You know the story. I called him up when he was on a motorcycle in Vietnam yeah and I was like you gotta quit that job yeah

yeah but I was right I was like you can't just first of all it's just not healthy for you or your family for you to be gone three four months at a time

no it's crazy and I know you're working and you gotta do what you gotta do but it can't it's not good for you no

and also you're just you're not reaching your potential as a stand-up. You're a hilarious guy. Yeah. You're great on podcasts. Totally. That's where you should be focusing your energy. But back when he first got on that show, podcasts were bullshit.

Like, when he first told the machine story on my podcast, who the fuck is watching it? No one's watching it. No, yeah. Podcasts were bullshit. So it was like me saying, go do a podcast. Like, what the fuck? Yeah. I have kids.

I know. What are you talking about? This isn't a job. I can't quit a TV job. Yeah, it sounds insane. Yeah. Yeah. I think I,

because I started to do like bigger shows and selling out clubs back then too and he was like, how is this happening? I was like, you just,

I go, I'm doing standup all the time. I do this podcast every week. I just got a special out and all of it combined together and I was like, you can, I go, I'm doing stand-up all the time. I do this podcast every week. I just got a special out. All of it combined together. And I was like, you can do this too. And he was like, oh, I don't know. And then he was like, and then I remember him telling me.

He's like, I did it. I'm not doing the, I quit. I'm not doing the Travel Channel. Amazing. I'm going to go all in. Well, it worked out luckily. Yeah. Jesus Christ.

Well, I could go the other way too. Yeah. But that thing about guys who don't take the leap i bet that's in every walk of life where people just don't but whatever it is when you're you're not all in but if you're if that's the fucking the haunting thing about the comedy world if you're not all in and someone else is i remember when i was on fear factor so i was uh you know doing stand-up when i could but god damn it i was working a lot i was working a lot it was just it was a lot of hours

and i remember i'd go to the store and i'd run into someone was a full-time comic and they're on the road yeah i just did uh west palm i was there thursday friday saturday i was like oh yeah that sounds so much better sounds like so much more fun yeah they're doing jokes yeah it's just like to me it was like doing stand-up seemed so much better it just seemed like a better life like that's that's what i'm it's more interesting you also have to have a like when i look back at the choices i made early on in stand-up, you know, you actually are in a bit of denial about... How bad you are? Not just how bad you are, how bad your life is.

Like, I mean, I'm not living in a... Like, all my friends with regular jobs have a much better quality of life. But here's the thing. It didn't even bother me really. Yeah, because you wanted it so bad. Yeah, I just wanted it so bad. I'm saying you have a bit of, you have a delusion almost, right?

Like people see where you live and they're like, how much money are you making? But you're used to it. You're so used to it. As long as you're used to it, it's fine. Now one thing would be like say if you had some white-collar job and you're making six figures a year, and then you decided to go to stand-up, and then you were living in the place like you were living in when I met you. Then it would suck a fat dick.

Yeah. Because you'd be like, fuck, now I'm falling apart. It's very difficult for people to downsize with the intention of upsizing eventually. It's almost impossible. It's hard. Yeah. But if that, you would be so much happier if you could kind of get by doing what you like to do. Yeah.

And then you could eventually make more money doing that. But the more money thing, the most important thing is, are you doing what you want to do? Because we don't have much time. We just don't. I'm 55. I'll be 56 in a month. That's 56. That's old as shit.

When I was a kid, I thought 56-year-old people were archaic wrecks that could barely stand up. You know, you're in the doctor's office every couple of weeks. Something's falling apart. Yeah, but look at you, man. You're happy you're thriving luckily luckily i got lucky i hit the the science and knowledge yeah and uh you know fitness world yeah and vitamin supplementation hormone supplementation all of it came right when i got old right it's like i just rode the wave that's true some of this stuff is just like

the luck of timing, right? A hundred percent. Yeah. A hundred percent. Well, also our lives, I think about this all the time. If we were exactly the same guys we are now, but we were at this age in like 1999. We're fucked. It's just a totally different life.

Yeah, totally different life. Yeah. Different life. First of all, no phones. Well, in 99 you had phones. But I mean, imagine 1919. You're fucked. Yeah. Different life. First of all, no phones. Well, in 99 you had phones. Yeah. But, I mean, imagine 1919. You're fucked.

Oh. You're fucked. Life is terrible. Yeah, yeah. Life's shit. Yeah. I mean, we got, as much as people complain about today, we got it fucking super easy. Oh, yeah.

It's very nice. Well, if it was 1919, first of all, when I broke my arm, they'd just be like, we're just going to cut your arm. We'll just saw it off, bite this leather strap. Yeah. That's what happened back then, too. Well, if it was 1919, first of all, when I broke my arm, they'd just be like, we're just going to cut your arm. We'll just saw it off, bite this leather strap. Yeah, that's what happened back then, too. You broke things and they'd be like, well, you're just a cripple. Yeah, you're a cripple now forever. We'll give you this cane

and this wheelbarrow with like, you can just lean on this wheelbarrow and kind of wheel that into town. When did they start setting bones? Ah, fuck it. What year was that? When they stopped hacking people's arms off? I don't know, dude. It's not that long ago, for sure.

Have you ever seen that video of the guy who's playing the banjo and his arm is broken and he never got it fixed? So his arm is like floating around. It's so crazy, dude. Like he's got the detachment between the two bones. This guy, look at this. It never re-healed. No, and I still work and stuff. Yeah. I still work. Look, his broken bones. This guy, look at this. It never re-healed. No, and I still work and stuff.

Yeah. I still work. Look, his butt is still broken in half. I mean, look. No. That is ridiculous. No. But you know how insane that is?

Maybe you can bring that together and play the banjo? Yeah, yeah. Look at this. Wow. When I have it staying, it keeps them straight. You know what I'm saying? That's amazing, dude. Well, that's one word for it.

I mean, imagine how weak that guy is in arm wrestling. I bet you could fuck him up. I mean, can he even open a jar of mayonnaise? Can he fucking, what can he do with that arm? It's really incredible. Because you know what's the thing that's kind of interesting? I had a double whammy, right, when I got injured. I tore my patellar tendon on my leg. Right, at the right at the patellar tendon tear is not like MCL ACL it that leg is completely useless like

there's no hinge anymore right so your knee doesn't you it just hangs right right so you have to reattach the tendon and for that to heal and be able to use it again it takes just just for it to heal takes about two months, then your muscle has atrophied completely, like your quad has completely atrophied. So then you have to learn how to walk and learn how to do steps again, and learn how to like, you know,

it's a complete, complete, like debilitating type of injury. So when I got, and they're both at the same time, so when I got injured, all the people in the hospital, doctors, PTs, they all looked at my arm. They're like, that's not going to be a problem. Right? And you think about it. You're like, yeah, you see people in casts all the time. They're like, you'll be fine with that.

That leg, that's going to be your problem. And it ended up being the opposite. Really? Oh, that's right, because of the nerve damage. I still have problems. Yeah? I still have nerve issues. Yeah. How bad is it now? Well, you know, an interesting thing. Remember we did sober October. You remember like I showed you me doing pushups with my shirt off. So like

my left rhomboid wasn't even firing. Right. So what happens is when you're, when you have like a muscle, a nerve sends a signal to your muscle. If there's nerve trouble going to that muscle, the muscle just doesn't fire. So when I was doing push ups because that wasn't firing, you have other muscles that compensate. That's the way your body works. Right. So like if you're going like this and that rhomboid doesn't fire, then like your lat starts to pick up for it. Oh, right. So it's like and it's doing it like unbeknownst like your lat starts to pick up for it. Oh. Right? And it's doing it like unbeknownst to your mind.

It's just doing it on its own. So I had like insane – it took me like six months to recover from the 100 push-ups a day. Wow. Because I wasn't able to use like the full strength of my body to do a normal push-up. Is it firing now? It's firing now because I actually have been, like, treating. I went to this place called Wired, and they put these, like. Oh, yeah, neuromuscular stimulation. Yeah.

Yeah, that's really good. That helped a lot. Electrical, rather. Electrical muscular stimulation. That EMS stuff is really good for injury recovery. That has helped me quite a bit. But I still, the thing that I have is, like great, like weird, I don't know how to even describe it, arm pain. When like if I try to like, if we were to like, if I was to jam you like this, like hands, it sends an incredibly painful signal through my arm.

Especially like the bicep tendon, things like that. So I'm just always like, I'm trying new things. I do different things in the gym. I do treatments like that so I'm just always like I'm trying new things I do different things in the gym I do treatments like that I'm going to get another nerve analysis done where they send these

signals through your arm have you done any hyperbaric chamber stuff no you should do that yeah I've heard that that's supposed to be very good with people

with nerve issues I'm going to try it you know it's double the atmosphere yeah you just sit in there right you can just read a book

yeah yeah I'll try that it's very relaxing it's no big deal but it's really just sitting there right you can just read a book yeah yeah i'll try that it's very relaxing it's no big deal but it's funny though because you think oh broken arm just throw a cast on that thing and you'll be done no and it's been yeah it's been a couple years it's not completely healed that's crazy yeah yeah injuries the one good thing about injuries is when you do get over them if you could remember because, because when you're injured, you're like, God damn it. Why wasn't I appreciating being healthy? Same way I feel when I'm sick. you know, about a little over a year ago, I realized that I was just regressing again.

And that was actually the big turning point for me. It was that I had kind of recovered for the most part from the injuries. And I was like, okay, I'm like healthy again. And I felt myself regressing again. I went to shoot this thing and I was like, I just saw myself. I was like, oh, I'm going backwards again. It bothered me. Is it food? I think it was food, yeah. Yeah.

But I just, I kind of was like, oh, I can't go back again. Dude, that carnivore diet kills all that. Really? You just can't overeat. You don't overeat. It's wild. Are you doing that right now? Yeah.

It's wild. I know when to stop eating. It's like if I am eating, say, like a steak and mashed potatoes and French fries and other stuff and bread, bread and butter, I'll just keep eating the mashed potatoes. Even after I'm done eating steak, I'll keep eating fries. I'll have another piece of bread. And all that stuff is just empty calories. Yeah, it's carbohydrates. It's not empty, but it's just, it's unnecessary. You're eating more than your body's going to burn off. And you're just, it's just for me, it's gluttony. What's a normal day for your eating? Like what do you, what's breakfast?

Today was a Neil guy steaks and bacon. So I cooked a couple of these small Neil guy steak. Neil guy's an antelope that I shot in Texas. So I fried that and fried, I fried bacon first. And then I cooked the Neil guy and bacon fat. Cause you need fat. Neil guy's a very lean animal. And if you're in a, you know, a a fat burning state which is what i'm in right now

yeah you have to have some sort of fats so like i like avocado oil um i'd like some of that primal kitchen mayonnaise it's made with avocado oil i'm not like avoiding vegetables per se but i'm 100 i'm avoiding bread and pasta and all that other bullshit and just when i if i have like i'll have a piece of asparagus every now and then I mean, but I'm not like thinking about Vegetables I take a shit ton of vitamins you take fruit and take yeah eat fruit when I want to yeah But most of my meals are steak and eggs most of my meals most of my meals are steak steak egg steak bacon That's most of my meals and I feel fucking great. It's what's wild is joint pain

That's most of my meals. And I feel fucking great. What's wild is joint pain. Like I've had a left knee that's been fucked with me forever. And I don't feel anything now. It's been two months on this diet, two plus months now. And it's like it just accelerated the healing. You feel way better. I think when you're eating a lot of shit, your body is in a state of inflammation.

Like I think most people are in, you know, there there's a scale of how much inflammation your body is carrying. And you don't think about inflammation because it's just how you are. And you're not eating anything crazy. I had spaghetti for dinner and I had a Subway sandwich for lunch. I'm not eating McDonald's. And you think you're not eating inflammation-causing foods, but you are. And you don't realize it until you cut those out of your diet. So much sugar.

I think it's sugar, but I also think there's a lot going on with wheat. I think with the complex glutens, and there could possibly be something with glyphosate. There's a lot of people that- What's glyphosate? Glyphosate is Roundup. That's that chemical that they spray on weeds that they found something like 94% of people have it in their blood. And the pesticide apologist will say, oh, it's just a small number. It's fucking poison. It's 100% cancer causing poison and 94% of the people have it in their body.

And by the way, if they're measuring it and you're getting an average of what these people have in it, well, who's, what's the high end? Yeah. There's gotta be some zeros too, right? There's gotta be people who only eat organic and they don't have any in them. So what's the high end?

Like how bad off are those people? What are people that, how about people that work on a farm? Like what's their- And they're just breathing that in all day. What's their fucking blood work look like? Yeah. Like what, you know blood work look like? Yeah.

Like what? You know, there's a better way to do it and they don't want to do it the better way because it's more expensive and it's difficult, you know, like to do a regenerative farm. But if you do it this way with Roundup and they use it everywhere, there's like, this stuff is fucking sketchy. Yeah. I've never really spent time thinking much about how wheat affects me personally. You know what I mean? Like I've never been the one that I do think about a lot is sugar. Yeah.

And also because I'm somebody who I can just, I have to just deny myself because I get into like a pattern. Right, right, right. If I give myself like, and, like – and also it's like there's this thing where you realize that you can really kind of fall into peer pressure kind of situation. Oh, for sure. You know, you're just like you're hanging out and you're like, try one of these.

And you go like, okay. And you like it, whatever, some pastry or something. And then you see it tomorrow and you're like, that was good yesterday. I'm going to get it today. And then I get into a pattern where i just i have to deny myself you get excited about yeah that mouth pleasure i do you know what i used to get for chocolate croissants buddy i used to be with you do you know where we used to get them buddy at the fucking terminal five delta when it when that was they had that place i remember I remember I would get off the plane with

you. Yeah. And it was coming back to LA. It was on the way back. Yeah. And we would arrive in the morning and you're like, these are fucking good. And I was like, mm-hmm. And then you're like, it's just one.

I can do this. And I was like, yeah, me too. I would think that we're the same. So I'd shove one down my throat. I was like, Joe's right. These are good. Go home and go to a fucking bakery and be like, can I get a dozen chocolate croissants? I mean, yeah, dude.

That might be my favorite treat of all. Chocolate croissants are pretty damn good. The buttery ones with the real, the mushy chocolate inside. Bro, I was just in Paris. Ooh, Paris. I've been to a national channel. Je n'ai pas les pas français. But I was, I always talk about,

I mean, I do have an affection for croissants. I really do. They're awesome. And I was like, we're in Paris. I was talking about, I was like, oh, I gotta sample some croissants in Paris. My fucking tour manager went out one morning, comes back, and he goes, I got something for you. I go, what?

He goes, I went and picked up the best croissants in Paris. Wow. And he gave me a sampling of these croissants. How good were they? They were unbelievable. They looked pretty damn good. Yeah. They were so unbelievable. Look at you, right?

You know how to say them? Well, I stammered through it. Chocolat. Yeah. I think they told me that in Paris, they say chocolatine for a chocolate croissant. They don't say it. They don't say it.

We don't say a croissant de chocolat. We say chocolatine. I said, okay. Chocolatine. Yeah, but we were definitely tearing him up in Paris. France is falling apart right now. Isn't that wild? Is it?

Did you see what's going on? I mean, when I was there, there was- The riots? Oh, when I was there, there was big riots.

Big ones. Have you seen the riots from the police kill the guy? No. When I was there, it was about the retirement age. Oh, this is way worse.

This is way, way worse. This is the last few days. What is the issue? This is the last few days. What is the issue? Somebody got murdered. There's been fucking gunfire in the streets, lighting businesses on fire for like five days. It's been like the purge. Some of the videos are insane.

French teen shot by police officer pleads with rioters to stop the violence. So something happened. I don't know the details of the story, but the police shot some guy. During a riot? No. Oh. I think they shot him in a – was it a traffic stop? I don't know.

It says police standoff. Oh. Tensions erupt in Paris suburb after a 17-year-old delivery driver is killed in a police standoff. I don't know what happened. He was shot and killed by a police officer Tuesday in a Paris suburb. According to the family's lawyer, the death unleashed tensions between angry residents setting barricades on fire and police firing tear gas. Police officer was detained on suspicion of manslaughter. According to the prosecutor's office in the Paris suburb of Nanterre, it said the shooting took place during a traffic check. The victim was wounded by a gunshot and died at the scene.

The prosecutor's office said in a statement a passenger in the car was briefly detained and released. The police are searching for another passenger who fled. So what was it that happened? Do we know what happened? Okay. we know what happened okay the lawyer cited a video reported to be of the incident circulating online that shows two police officers leaning into the driver's side window of a yellow car before the vehicle pulls away and one officer fires towards the driver the car is later seen crashed into a post nearby so they tried to take off and he shot them so is this what prompted

these riots though yes okay. Isn't that crazy that description of what happened in the traffic stop seems so routine here. Like you all, like there's an endless series of videos that you can watch of something similar to that. Yes. That's always, it always feels like it's very US. Yeah. Like we always have incidents in traffic stops. Sure. Which are, you know, I'm not saying blame is always one way or the other. It's, you know, sometimes it's the person in the car, sometimes it's the... Sure. But that just seems like a really routine thing here.

You know what people have to think about with cops? I know it's very hard to do if you're not a cop, but I want you to try. You know that feeling that you get when you're driving on the highway? There's a reason why people get road rage. Road rage, rather. There's a reason why they get road rage, too. Yeah, there is. There's a reason why they get road rage. And the, rather. There's a reason why they get road rage, too. Yeah, there is. There's a reason why they get road rage.

And the reason why they get road rage is when you are on the road and you're driving, you're in a heightened state because your car is going 60 miles an hour. So you're ready at any time to hit the brakes, to change lanes. So you're in this heightened state. And then when someone does something, like, you fucking idiot. Yeah. Jesus Christ. Yeah. Where you would never do that. Like like it took me a while to realize this

I forget where I read it and then when I read I was like duh Because I was always like how come nobody treats people like that when they're walking yeah No one ever does that you're protected by someone gets in front of you when you're walking Oh the guy got in front of me. It's not an issue at all, but in the car Yeah, fucking asshole fucking shit fucking cut in front of me. Yeah, that's issue at all, but in the car you're like, fucking asshole. Fucking piece of shit. You fucking cut in front of me. That's what it is because you're at a heightened state. Now, imagine being a cop and every time you pull someone over, we've all seen those videos of cops getting shot. We've all seen those videos of cops pulling people over and then the windows explode and people fire on them. We've all seen those. They've seen them too. They know people

who've been shot. They have no idea who you are. They have no idea what's going on. So when they come up to that car, they are at a heightened state. They have to be. They are literally, to a criminal, they're the professional enemy.

Their job is to be the enemy of the criminal. It's a fucking crazy position to be in in society. And we don't treat it with enough respect. And when the consequence when it when it goes badly all we think about is that officer that's a representative of all police officers but it's not true it's true i think a lot of people too it's it's kind of hard like a lot of people they go into getting pulled over with a heightened sense of emotion themselves sure which if you are that person getting pulled over for a heightened sense of emotion themselves sure which if you are that

person getting pulled over for whatever you got pulled over for if that's your like mentality in that moment you are actually going to escalate things you are as the person 100 and and it does take an effort to go okay this guy like you, he's walking up here in a heightened state. Yeah. Like I can diffuse things. I can diffuse them. Yes. By how I conduct this.

Yes. But some people, you know, first you have the people that are like the legal scholars who want to lecture the police officer on his rights. Like, yeah, you can do that, man. Or there's the, I have friends even. I have friends who are like, I hate cops. Cops are all pigs. And I've watched them speak to police officers in a way where I'm like, Jesus Christ, man.

Like, it's so disrespectful. So stupid. I go, yeah. I go, but you are making this worse. Right. That's a human being. Yeah, yeah. Like, when you fucking interact a little bit you don't know them yeah you don't get on your knees right but you know just like he's doing his thing just like let's try to let's try to smooth this thing out let's not try to make it worse try to make it better yeah exactly if i

ever have an interaction with a cop it's's always, how you doing, sir? Yeah. What's happening, brother? Everything good? Yeah. I want it smooth and easy. Completely. Yeah. And just that whole, but I fucking, those kind of generalizations, all cops are pigs, like, fuck off. No, it's not good. Fuck off.

I don't like those generalizations with anything. Women are stupid. Shut, fuck off. Fuck off. Fuck off. No. It's just annoying. No, you're like, most women are stupid.

No. But if you go into this. Yeah, like that. Any interaction with a fucking retail worker, a fucking auto mechanic, anything. Any interaction. And sometimes, I think if this comes with age, sometimes you do meet a real piece of shit. Oh, yeah. Like, it can be a police officer it can be

the mechanic it can be car salesman the cars oh fuck the car salesman flight attendant yeah and i used to take i used to i would say i call it take the bait more right feel the rage be become like escalate things yeah well yeah i'll be like i mean i've said some regrettable things you know because but i mean like i think with age now some one of the things that happens is you go like i you know i think this person sucks and internally and i go i'm just like i had a i had a flight where i've been I don't know, a million flights, right? And it was early morning cross-country flight. And the flight attendant, I was like, she was like, you want breakfast?

I was like, well, I'm going to zonk out here, so maybe when I wake up in a little while. And she goes, no. She goes, it's breakfast now. Whoa. And I looked at her, and I was like, I was just processing. I was like, that's like, it was super rude. When did that change? Pandemic?

Did they just fire a bunch of people that had been there for a long time and hire a bunch of new people and pay them less? I have a real trigger, too, for like disrespect or even perceived disrespect, you know, where I, I then become like, I've, I mean, I almost got arrested at an airport one, one time for this, you know, I ended up calling the TSA agent a pig, but, but again, that was a few years ago, but this was like this, I looked at her and I was like, and in my mind I was, I was, I could have said like escalated things. And I just thought, I go, you know what? I don't know why she's an asshole. I don't know what's going on.

I just went, yeah, I think I'm just going to sleep. I go, I'm just going to sleep. She's like, okay. I just walked away. And she was clearly rude. And I'd never been spoken. Most flight attendants, when you go, I'm just going to sleep, they're like, yeah, I'll check on you later, see if you want to eat then.

Yeah. We'll keep it warm for you. Yeah. She was so rude, but I just was like, just why make this a thing, you know? I was just like, I go, I'm just going to sleep. It might be hard to find people to do that now. Yeah.

You know? Yeah. Yeah, no, they have huge, the biggest issue in commercial air travel right now is staffing. Really? It's still staffing. Really? Absolutely.

It's still staffing. It's why you're finding an incredible number of delays. It's not just staffing for airlines. It's also staffing at air traffic control. So all that is together. If you fly commercially, you'll notice that, I mean, it is a miracle to board and take off and land on time. Almost everything is delayed. It is delayed. You have a lot of times everything is functioning well, then you get there. I can't tell you how many flights are just like, well, everything's ready to go.

And they're like, yeah, the crew's not here. Crew's here. This crew has to swap out. They've maxed out their hours. Now we're waiting for a new crew. This is like over and over. And then it happens at air traffic control where they are not fully staffed yet either. So this just is a huge delay thing.

I mean, commercial travel just needs to be revamped. Well, Pete Buttigieg is doing a great job. Yeah, sure. They're doing great. He's the best. He's the best at it. He's handling it. Don't worry. He's got it covered. Who's this? Pete Buttigieg.

Oh, yeah. That's my guy. Is he the guy? He's the guy in charge of transportation. That's a fucking shit show. He's in charge of the fucking trains He's the guy in charge of transportation. He's in charge of the fucking trains flying off the rails. You've done a terrible job, Pete. So was it during COVID? Did people get fired and then they decided to do other things and they never took the jobs again?

Some people got fired. Some people, I mean, I think more people were even just let go like you know there's a lot of places like that had to shut down their operations they had no more revenue coming in so they let people go and then you've seen what happened with what's what happened with uh commercial real estate commercial real estate is upside down in this country is it yes you know why? Why? Because people don't want to go to offices still anymore. Yeah, they want to do remote work. They want to do remote work.

They want to work in their pajamas and jerk off. So the people who, if you have these big commercial buildings, I mean, it used to be like this huge asset to own this commercial real estate, and now it's like a liability because you have empty offices, dude. You have empty offices all over the country and you can't fill them up. You can't force people. Then there's companies that have just, I know somebody that owns a company that said, he goes, I like a lot of people goes, I wanted people to come here. I want them in the office.

And he was met with, like, such total resistance because I just realized I had to allow it. Like, if we were going to continue to operate. Wow. So he just gave in to his employees going, no, we don't want to do that. Wow. Yeah. And it's a sizable operation he has.

Wow. So people just say, no, I want to work at home. Yeah, and And it's a sizable operation he has. Wow. So people just say, no, I want to work at home. Yeah. And they're like, and I've been working and I'm effective. And to a degree, they are like in his case, he's like, you know, the work was getting done. I just prefer to have everybody operating the way we normally had. But he was like, everybody was like, no. I used to do an hour and a half commute every day.

I haven't done that now in two years. I don't want to do it again. And then he had to go like, okay. As long as they're disciplined and as long as they're actually effective, I could see that. Then you've got this stupid-ass office. What do we do with this place with all these offices? Hence why this commercial interstate business is like in the shitter. Wow.

I wonder what happens with that because it doesn't seem like that's going to change. But there are a lot of CEOs that are supposedly pushing back on all this stuff. I keep reading articles every day. The interesting thing is you know how people always adapt, right? Nothing just goes.

If something's losing money, people don't just go, well, I guess we'll just lose money forever. So there is going to be a point, and maybe it's happening now, where you're going to start seeing something done with this commercial property. Like if things stay vacant, they're not just going to hold on to that for 15 years. Yeah. They're going to turn that into something. I was reading some dipshit comedian on Twitter saying that they should turn all that into housing. Great.

For homeless people. Yeah, that is very popular. That's really good if you don't own the building, you fucking communist. Yeah. What are you talking about? I mean, I got to say that also reminds me of this, you know, and I know this will be unpopular for a lot of people to hear. But the idea of forgiving student loans, it's a fantastic theory. But one thing that nobody considers who is a huge advocate of that is, okay, so somebody owns that debt. That debt is owned.

So are you saying, when you say forgive, who are you saying will, are you saying that the government will just pay all of that debt? Do you have an idea the amount of debt that that is? Somebody owns the debt. So if you go forgive the debt, to what degree? Like are you just saying erase it? It doesn't just disappear. The debt is owned.

Right. So when you say just pay it, who? Who are you saying will pay it? In taxes? Right. Everybody is going to pay it then. Right. So the'll pay it in taxes right everybody's gonna pay it then right so that that just doesn't get erased is my point but there is a bizarre issue with student loan debt that student loan debt is the only

debt that you can't declare bankruptcy yeah that part is that's crazy that's crazy crazy that doesn't make any sense but when you say forgive it you it's not just like I think a lot of people say that and they go I just don't want to pay this yeah of course I understand that. Yeah. But you realize that somebody has to pay it. That just, it doesn't just go into the sky.

Right. Somebody owns that debt. So who's going to pay it? It's, if you say that the, the government will forgive student loans. I mean, that amount has to be in like the trillions.

I wonder what it is. Let's find out. What's the collective student loan debt in the United States as of 2020? I do know there is a differentiation in this conversation that it's federal student loan debt, not private student loan debt, which is a big difference. Okay. That's companies that do own that debt versus like the government that granted- So this is just federal student loans.

I'm pretty sure of that. Okay, so there's two different types of loan debt. So I'd want to know what it is compared to the military industrial complex budget. Oh, yeah. Right. That budget is astronomical. As a budget boy, they accidentally paid an extra $6 billion to Ukraine. They're like, whoops.

Whoopsie. See, with this statement, I don't know if this is differentiating that either. It says it's $1.78 trillion in student loan debt. That's a lot, dude. That's more than people owe on any other type of debt in the U.S. except for mortgages, though the Biden administration is trying to forgive hundreds of billions of dollars in student loan balances. That's more than people owe on any other type of debt in the U.S., well, except for mortgages.

But, I mean, isn't that, like, you see what I'm saying? Like, if you just say, hey, erase this debt. Okay. I mean, I get that. But you do understand that that has to come from somewhere. Right. It's not just them going. It's not air debt.

Yeah. That is both. That is federal and private together. Okay. So that's all of it. $1.75 trillion. Click on that so we can see what it says there. It says on average, it says cost of college has steadily increased over the last 30 years.

That time frame tuition costs at public four-year colleges grew from $4,160 to dollars to ten thousand seven hundred forty and from nineteen thousand three sixty to thirty eight thousand seventy it's crazy at private nonprofit institutions adjusted for inflation all costs have risen So is the need for student loans and other forms of financial aid? Imagine if you're a person that makes a hundred grand a year and your kid is going to school and it costs Thirty eight thousand dollars a year and then your kid gets out and they get a $50,000 a year job and you realize they're never going to pay this back. It's insane. What they're doing, it is...

That's what they wanted to get rid of. It says 92% of all student debt are federal student loans. The remaining amount is private student loans. Okay, so it's a trillion. It's a trillion plus. Yeah. That's a lot, dude. It's a lot.

And so how much have we spent on Ukraine and how much are we going to spend on Ukraine? But here's the thing. Like if you forgave that debt, wouldn't that spark the economy? Wouldn't like if people have more money, the thing about when people have more money, people spend more money. When people spend more money, the economy does better. If people are straddled with student loan debt, I got to think that somehow or another cripples the economy. I don't think you're wrong in theory about that. I mean, it would seem that like you'd obviously have more to do. Yeah.

You could do more with your money. And it's not like you're giving people money. You're just absolving them of debt. Which is a huge one. The real problem is the whole predatory student loan situation. Yeah. That's a real problem. And it's also a real problem to saddle down a 17-year-old with debt that they will keep for the rest of their life.

And they hit you at that same time at the student union with your first credit card. And they're like, just use this. And it's got 29.9%. Yeah. You're like, okay. You don't know what the fuck you're using. And you need to do it to build your credit. I need to.

I need to build my credit. I'm going to buy a car. You're paying $26 a month for a coffee you bought. It's crazy. It is crazy. Yeah. The whole thing is insane, but it's insane that we do it to kids. Because, you know, kids don't have a sense of the future.

They just don't. They've only been alive for 18 years. 18 years is not enough time to figure out what kind of debt you're going to be in when you're 70. Don't you wonder, too, why, why, when we're in. Don't you wonder, too, why when we're in school, and it's still not a thing when kids are in school, we don't really teach them about money? You don't learn shit about money. You don't learn shit.

I'm saying at any level, elementary school, high school. We don't learn shit about anything you need to manage life. No. You're basically learning how to say words and not form sentences. You don't learn about money? You don't learn about nutrition? Nope. Nothing about that.

You don't learn about thinking. No. I mean, you know how many kids could be saved from a lifetime of bullshit if you just explain to them why jealousy, why it affects them? Sure, emotions. Yeah, explain that these are just natural human emotions that we evolve, but you have to learn how to conquer that. And you learn how to, you learn that,

like one of the most amazing, it seems like it's something you should be taught in like middle school, is feel feelings. Let them sit. Yes, yeah. When you feel jealous, you're not supposed to never feel jealous. Right.

But you learn to go, okay, that's the feeling. Yeah. And this is why I feel jealous about it. But you learn to go, okay, that's the feeling. Yeah. I'm feeling, and this is why I feel jealous about it. And guess what? All feelings, they, they dissipate, but you, it's, they get worse. They extend when you fight them, when you resist you, I don't want to feel it. And you, and you don't want to actually process the feeling and deal with it. I mean, having that understanding that all those emotions are natural to have, it's like, it really is something that could serve you so much better to learn younger.

I don't want to learn that at 40. Teach me that at 13. Right. You know? Yeah. It would make high school a lot easier to deal with. Yeah. I mean, they should teach kids the value of exercise in terms of mental health, the benefits that it has on that.

Nope. You have to figure that out on your own. Yeah. You figure that out through trial and error, through your own life. Totally. Yeah, nobody's teaching, unless you're listening to podcasts,

nobody's teaching you that in school. How to think. No, no one's teaching you how to think. And no one's teaching, no one who you admire, who lives a good life, is teaching you how they do it. Yeah.

You know, that's another thing. People are real stingy with, you know, their own personal success formulas. Oh, yeah. Well, that's one of my big, like stingy with their own personal success formulas. Oh, yeah. Well, that's one of my big, like the litmus test for a good person. When I go, this is a cool motherfucker, is people who are willing to share information. It's a really like, it's a gauge for a solid person.

Yeah. It's when you go like, how did you build this studio? There's the person who goes, it takes work. I had my guys. And you're like, all right. That's them going like, I'm not going to tell you. Right. That's mine.

Exactly. And then there's a person who's like, here's his card. Give him a call. He's awesome. It's like people who share information, whatever it is, are the people who don't have that insecurity that like, well, if you have it, then it's no longer mine. Right. And by the way, it's only good.

It's good for the person. Like say if it's someone who does something, you need a mechanic. I have the best fucking mechanic in Austin. This guy's a shit. Yeah. I'll tell you about him. I'll fucking, you know, and then if you do that

and then he gets work. Yeah. And then he goes, oh, Joe says you're awesome. Oh, that's nice. He feels good. Isn't that amazing, though, how people, some people are like, no, that's my mechanic. Yeah, but if I call, if I give you him, I need my fucking car worked on first. First, yeah.

First. Okay? It's such a stupid thing. So you got to tell me if you're going to bring your car in, because if I need my car worked on, I called first. It's gross. It's just famine. on, I called first. It's gross. It's just famine. The famine mentality. Yeah.

It's common in everything. It's a stupid mindset. But it also comes from being around groups of people that think that way. If you get fortunate enough to be around someone who doesn't think that way, I'm very fortunate in martial arts because in martial arts it's a very meritocracy based thing where and it's also you need really good people to get good yeah so everybody like cherishes and and and also respects and celebrates people that are really good yeah cuz it's like it's good for everybody it is it's all that's good in comedy too when you see someone killing you like damn go watch this guy watch

this guy yeah fuck yeah and then you get a juice you get a little juice out of it yeah if you look at it the right way yeah you do watching great stand-up is like medicinal it is inspiring yes yes it makes and it makes you go like i mean i think i told you this that like when i was at the club and atel was in town it was just a great reminder not just watching him on stage, which was fantastic, but just hanging out with him. It just took me like, it actually took me back to like, oh yes, like hanging out with somebody like this in the green room reminds you of all the things you love about doing standup. The green room at that club has been the greatest thing that I've ever experienced. Yeah, it's been great. Because I knew, well, first of all, I knew the setup was perfect because both rooms are right next to the, the green room is in the center.

In the middle, yeah. In the center. It's literally, I mean, you can go from the green room onto the little stage in 30 seconds. Yeah. And then you can go downstairs to get to the other one and you're watching on the monitors and you got the balcony. Yeah. It's so centrally located.

It's so perfect. Yeah. And you're above, you can go watch the show from the balcony yeah it's so centrally located it's so perfect yeah and you you're above you can go watch the show from the balcony yeah so anytime like you know shane gills is on stage go out there and watch a set we'll watch the set and you go back inside and everybody's laughing it's fucking amazing the hang is so good yeah it's all about the hang because that was the you know as we used to always say that about the store, too, is that what was the best part of the store?

You go to the parking lot. Yeah. Standing in the parking lot. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And just shooting the shit with people. But this is, we have a parking lot with a bar. Yeah. And a private bathroom.

Yeah. It's like the whole thing is set up. It's nice. It's awesome. It's so nice. But just to be able to be around those guys all the time. Rich Voss was in last week. Yeah.

Oh, my God, he's fun. I think Tony Woods is there this weekend. I was trying to, because I only came in for the night, but I was trying to make it last night and I got delayed. I couldn't come in. Is Tony Woods there this weekend? Tony Woods is a funny motherfucker. Tony Woods is so funny.

Oh, my God, he's so good. I was so excited to get him in here. He went to the Vulcan. That fucking guy went on stage at the Vulcan that fucking guy went went on on stage The Vulcan was some shit that he was just talking about in the green room like and something not a bit Yeah, organic. Yeah, and then went on stage. It was killing for five minutes with it. Yeah, just so smooth So what a veteran Tony was a veteran when I met him yeah so I met him in like 92

91 somewhere around there and no and no like arrogance about that guy sends me bible verses yeah sends me bible verses

and tells me God bless me all the time all the time dude there he is people don't even know he's so good folks if you get this

when is this coming out is this coming out tomorrow tomorrow yeah so if you get this, when is this coming out? Is this coming out tomorrow? Tomorrow. Yeah, so if you get this July 7th through 9th, Tony Woods at the Mothership. It's probably already sold out. Can't recommend it enough. He's so good.

I did Shoreline Amphitheater in Northern California, I think that's what it's called, just north of San Francisco, with Chappelle and like a lineup, you know, like a festival style lineup. Dude, Tony Woods went up like fifth and did, I don't know, 20 minutes, 18, 20 minutes. And it was 22,000 people. He got a standing ovation and the rest of us just looked at each other and we were like, Oh shit. We all had to go after him.

We were like, fuck. And he got off and I go, what the fuck was that? I mean, standing ovation. He goes, it was a college set. Because it was like a set that he did at college. He goes, it was a college set. I go, what the fuck, man? What are you talking about?

It's a college. That's how calm he is. But also, Chappelle fans know, like real hardcore Chappelle fans know, that Dave was really inspired by Tony. And Tony took him under his wing. Dave was like a teenager. A teenager. In D.C.

Yeah, and they've been friends for decades. I'm so glad the internet sort of brought Tony Woods back in people's mind. You guys don't know. If you have not seen this guy, truly a masterful stand-up. Masterful. And the best guy. Yeah.

He's on the podcast Thursday? Thursday. So fucking funny. I love that guy. But he's the sweetest guy in the world, man. The funny thing is, he's probably done what I just described to you so many times that if you brought it up to him,

he'd be like, yeah you know I'm out there killing but it's that guy that has a total lack of promotion he doesn't promote he has zero promotion in him he doesn't promote anything yeah unfortunately because the talent levels through the fucking roof he's one of the best comics on earth totally I have 20 on earth I bet he. He's one of the best comics on earth. Totally. Top 20 on earth. I bet he could also, is one of the guys who legitimately, like at your club, if he wanted to,

could do like five different sets. Oh yeah. Yeah, yeah. Oh yeah, he's been around forever. And he just, he's got material and everything. That's my theme park set, man. Yeah.

Oh, okay. Oh, that's Cowboys are in Town. You know. You're like know what the fuck is that your new hour that's from 96 okay yeah

no he's a murderer yeah it's so good but you know it's like that's the beautiful thing about this business is you will run into

those guys that are much more talented than they are popular it's interesting and then you run into people that are much more popular than they are talented yes people's interesting. And then you run into people that are much more popular than they are talented. People that are really good at staying popular.

That's a skill set. That's what you realize the longer you do this. And I think that is only relevant in the internet age, in the age of this where like people, there are people who always have that thing of like they know how to get people talking about them and juiced up about them. And it becomes the, it becomes like the thing that they actually worked on.

Right. What have you been working on? They're like staying popular. Right. Like in my promotions. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

It's a big thing. But then you look at their standup and you go, do you got to do that with that stuff? I remember, I remember like an early version of this where this guy was like, can you get me on stage at this club? And he had, I kind of knew, I didn't know him well. I probably should have listened to my own

inner dialogue about that. But I was like, you know, you feel the pressure when the person's right in front of you so i go all right so the club owner is there and i go can my friend do a spot and they're like is he good and i'm like yeah so he goes up and he he pretty much just eats shit, right? And I was like, fuck. And so, of course, the club guy is like, the fuck was that? And I'm like, I don't know.

So I talk to him, and I go, dude, you know, he goes, if you'll let me do another set on the Late Show, I'll do a different set. And I was like, so I go, let him do a different set on the Late Show. And the club owner's like, are you sure? And I'm like, yeah. And here's the thing. How many years in were you? A few, not many.

Not now. And I go, no, no, no. And I go, all right right here's the thing the reason I even brought this up is that the guy this is years ago had like the best website I'd ever seen at the time I was like this website's fucking amazing and like all his marketing tools were incredible yeah you know like he had like cool business card and like you went to his site and you were like shit it looks like you locate yeah dude like his site looked like fucking nike building you know i was like this thing is fucking rad you know and he goes up on the second the first second set not

only does he eat shit but he does the same set as like as the first right and i go dude you did the same shit and he was just like, ah, yeah. And I could see he was in the... And I actually left it. I go, all your shit is cool. Your website. I go, you got to work more on what you're doing on stage. Like, that's your priority.

Don't you think, though, that that's like a distraction because they're not working on that other stuff? A thousand percent. So they concentrate on the promotion because they're not working on that other stuff. A thousand percent. So they, they concentrate on the promotion because they're distracting themselves from the fact they're not working on the difficult stuff. And not only is that a hundred percent true, but there's so many parallels in life to that. Sure. We can all go like, I'm working on this thing to avoid this thing. Yes. And then you can, and especially if you get good at the side thing and then people go like, oh, wow. Yeah. Your cooking really has gotten incredible.

You're just like not working on anything else, you know? It's very easy to do. Very easy. And we can all trick ourselves. Very easy to trick yourself. Yeah, it's very easy to do. With stand-up, it's incredibly easy to be like, I'm working on this other project, though. Right. And you can make excuses. I did, I'm working on this other project, though. Right.

And you can make excuses. I did that when I was on news radio, for sure. I was doing the same set for like two years. I wasn't fixing anything. Kills you internally. Killed me. Killed me, just my ability. I wasn't connected to the material anymore.

I was just saying it, you know? And then I had one set in front of some producers and I bombed, ate shit, and then I really felt bad. I really felt, because I knew why I ate shit. I just,

I knew I had a flat set which was not connected. It wasn't, and I knew I wasn't working on it. I hadn't written anything in a long time and then I bore down and I got way better.

Like, within six months, I was killing. I was doing all this new shit. I was completely reinvigorated. I was also getting better sets too. The set I bombed, it was like 1 a.m. in the main room where you cannot be sucky. You have to grab those people and hang onto them.

They have to know you're really and hang on to them you have to agree they have to know you're good they've seen everything it's one o'clock in the morning horrible in hollywood and i was you know going on after people that were way better than me i just ate shirt yeah you need those sets though they're so good for you those fucking bombs it's like heartbreak too you need those it sounds like a terrible counterintuitive thing to feel bad is good for you. But you need perspective. And the real perspective only comes the hard way. Disappointment.

Yeah, disappointment. Heartbreak, like you said. Failure. Heartbreak is a real good one. Yeah, failure. Yeah, you fail. Failure in a relationship. Failure in a friendship. Failure in a business venture. Failure. Yeah, you fail. Failure in a relationship, failure in a friendship, failure in a business venture, failure artistically, failure athletically.

Failure, failure, failure. Yeah, that shit right there. Dude, when you were saying the patella, I had a patella tendon graft on my left knee when I got my ACL reconstructed. And they took a slice of the patella. They were like, don't worry about it. The thing's really big. I was like, now I'm thinking about it. I'm like, how big is it?

And you know my snap. It blows out. He goes like 90, forget the, 93% of patellar tendon tears happen at a connection point. In other words, you know, there's two points of connection, either on the patella or on the what is it the tibia it might be incorrect yeah he's like you're snapped in the middle he goes which just takes a tremendous amount of force which makes sense and when you think about how because i was leaping he's like leaping as hard as you can right and you retired and you'd fucked it up a couple of days before right i fucked it up earlier that day oh jesus and so and he's like he's like fucked it up a couple of days before, right? I'd fucked it up earlier that day. Oh, Jesus.

And so, and he's like, so it's a really weird, like it's an unusual place to tear. Injuries, bro. Injuries, yeah. I've had so many. Yeah. But you know what? That's another good thing about martial arts and jujitsu. It's like I understand like there's stuff you have to do to make sure you don't get injured as often.

That's one of the reasons why I stay strong. I don't want to be weak. When you're weak, you get hurt. And old people, that's one of the major reasons why they fall down is just they're feeble. There's an interesting video, not a video, photography series of cross sections of people's anatomy done through MRI. So they show a 70 year old sedentary person next to a 70 year old triathlete. It's wild. They show a 40 year old sedentary person next to a 40 year old triathlete. And there's all these, I mean, obviously I'm not saying you have to be a triathlete but just being strong being strong enough to do stuff is so important the only way you get that way is lifting weights and working out the only thing i keep preaching to my friends

my family circle of people i'm around especially guys guys and women i want to make that point too women too is you have to have resistance, weight resistance. People get into their, when they hear that, they keep thinking like tremendously heavy weight. Like, oh, I'm not going to be a power lifter. And you're like, no shit. Yeah. And you shouldn't even try to be.

Yeah, there it is. Look at the cross section. So the top is the guy who has the workout schedule. And it's all muscle. And then the bottom is just mostly who has the workout schedule. And it's all muscle. And then the bottom is just mostly fat, the same size leg. And there's just this weak-ass, bitch-ass muscle around the fat. Yeah. When I see that, I want to leg kick him.

That bottom one, just imagine what kind of damage you would do if you were slamming a shin into that. When you're in the hotel gyms, and sometimes you see these dudes of all ages, but I would say starting at like 40 into the 70s is the guy who walks in with kind of like the beginning of dropped head syndrome. Uh-huh. Like this, and immediately you know this guy is going to the elliptical or treadmill. Mm-hmm. Because that guy doesn't lift weights.

And all you have to do, like not all you have to do, but if you want to avoid that path, weight training. Yeah. Start lifting weights. Yeah. Have some type of resistance training. Put your body under that stress, your muscles and your skeletal structure under the stress of picking up something and resisting. Build your muscle. Yeah. structure under the stress of picking up something and resisting build your muscle yeah i have like

this conversation with my cousins and my siblings and my friends all the time who i i see on the path of like not touching weights yeah like dude it's not gonna you're not gonna be fine just doing the elliptical right it's gonna deteriorate even guys that i know that do jujitsu especially as they get into their 40s i always tell tell them, you're not working out? Other than training, you're only doing jujitsu? And they're like, yeah, I go, dude, at least once a week you should be lifting weights. At least once a week. You really should be doing it a little bit every day.

The key is a little every day. That's the Pavel Tatsalin method. the Pavel Tatsalin method. You know, I think if you can, if you're doing something else like jujitsu, you really, you can get by with a couple of workouts in the morning and a couple of workouts in the afternoon where you're not even killing yourself. You just like doing some kettle bells, doing some chin-ups, doing some push-ups, but you're making your body do these things. Even if you do only one set of chin-ups, you do 10 chin-ups, do 20 dips, do 20 push-ups, do 20 body weight squats. Just do that. Just do that. Just that. That's weight. It's your physical weight, your body weight. And if you can get some kettlebells, get some kettlebells and do

10 clean presses each side. It's not a lot. It'll take you two minutes. Do it in the morning, do it at night, do it twice. If you do that all the time, your body just gets accustomed to doing that all the time. And then you develop tissue that protects your joints and your tendons get stronger. And then, you know, you have the ability to do stuff. Yeah. But you could tell, I mean, like those scans are wild, obviously. Wild. You're seeing the real thing.

Yeah. But when I see just like regular dudes that are older and you see the guy that is active, it really blows you away. Just the way that they stand. Yeah. They stand a different way. Yeah, man. Their shoulders are back and you go, oh, man, this guy. Yeah, this guy's been active for 40 years.

Yeah. And the guy that is fucking walking down the hall like this. I always find those dads this i always find those dads i always find those dads that like when i have these parent teacher things i'm like that guy lifts weights yeah hey buddy yeah yeah you click this i met this jack dude the other day i was like you're my new friend left out the 40 year old it looks the same yeah the 40 year old triathlete i was trying to explain that but but that was just, yeah. It's basically the same. Same amount of muscle tissue.

That's incredible. Yeah. Was that at a parent-teacher thing? Yeah, super jack guy. T-shirt, shorts. I was like, look at you, buddy. We're hanging in there. That's cool.

That's the thing, though, is you actually start to be drawn to people like that. Oh, yeah. I know that guy's fucking put in the work like a guy who can be that fit at 55 years old when I see him I'm like alright it's a winner I can hang out with that guy

I wanna hang out with that winner winner mentality yeah that guy knows how to do it if you're still you haven't quit now and you know you're driving a Porsche so you have money

so like okay why you haven't laid back now okay you gotta get that Porsche that's my buddy yeah yeah I just you you know You haven't laid back now? Okay. I've got to get that portion. That's my buddy. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I just, you know, you cannot do it.

You don't have to. But if you want your life to be better, it's one of those things. It has to be done. Yeah, and you guys, like, who are in their 50s are just going to, you're going to be the guys that in your 60s and 70s people go like, you're fucking 65? Yeah. Holy shit. Yeah, there was this dude that was training with Tim Kennedy a couple months back. He posted on his Instagram. And then his dad came.

His dad was 70, six pack, fit as fuck. Really? This is wild, 70. Okay. Canary in the coal mine. That's what I used to say about Stallone. He was my canary in the coal mine. Yeah.

He still gets after it. He got fat as fuck though at one point in time. He did. Yeah, he got a giant belly. I don't know if that was for a movie. He did. Is that for a movie? Yeah, there was a movie where he plays either a police officer or a security guard, and they told him.

You got to get fat. You got to get fat. He did. He was like, I was eating pancakes every day. Wow. That's a rough thing to do when you're 70. I think. This was actually, it was a little while ago for this one.

So maybe we're thinking about two different movies. Oh, no, no, no. I remember that. I remember that. That was a very good movie. What movie was that? There's like a flood or something, right? What was that movie?

Copland. That was a very good movie and he was very good in it. He was. He can act. Yeah, he can. But I remember watching him talk about gaining weight for that. So you're saying a different one. No, it's recent. It's recent. He was on the beach. I think he was going through a divorce. He was probably drinking gaining weight for that. Right. So you're saying a different one. No, it's recent.

Oh, okay. It's recent. He was on the beach. I think he was going through a divorce. He was probably drinking a lot of beer. Oh, pfft. Okay. Because he got divorced for a little while.

He did? He was getting divorced and he stopped getting... Yeah. Why do I know this? But it was Sylvester Stallone belly on beach. He was real fat on the beach. See, we're used to him looking like in that picture where he's got the t-shirt. Yeah.

How old is he now? Two. Yeah. That's not even a good, that's not even a bad one. Some of the other ones are like, yeah, there he is. Like, he's a fucking huge belly. Yeah. That's beer, son.

That's beer and lasagna. Yeah. That's what that is. That's giving in to them guinea instincts. Yeah. For sure. them guinea instincts yeah for sure dude when we went to the bronx we went to uh uh new jersey had a ufc a month ago is this the sandwich thing yes it was so good you know that like my salivary glands watching like a dog i think one of my favorite like when you talk about your favorite

things to eat for me like an ital towel an Italian sub like a joke with all the meat this this guy Giovanni from GNR deli in the Bronx this is these are really crazy yes oh my god that one right there I think that was chicken chicken cutlet with sun-dried peppers and frets fresh mozzarella yeah and that's just one of them but there was a bunch of different sandwiches that he made this was in the Bronx yeah that's my man Tommy jr. and this was one that they made with pork was fantastic do these people know how to eat Italians know how to eat they go

hard and this guy Giovanni you go to his see that one in the back that's the what they call the Bronx godfather That's fucking sensational. It's the greatest Italian sub I've ever had in my life. It was so good, dude I overate so hardcore. Yeah, I ate and we they gave us so they're so generous They gave us like a tray of sandwiches and we brought him to the UFC So I was telling all the other on-air guys Mike, you know DC DC loves his food. Yeah, I was like come have a sandwich Yeah, they grabbed look at my fat face I was telling all the other on-air guys, I'm like, you know, D.C. D.C. loves his food. Oh, yeah. I was like, come have a sandwich. He was like, oh, shit. Oh, yeah.

They grabbed, look at my fat face. Yeah. That looks amazing. Yeah. So I'll go off the rails, bro. Yeah. I'll go off the rails every now and then. Come on.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I went out to dinner with Matt Serra and John Rollo the other day. So it was three guineas at Red Ash. So I had to go off the rails. I had the bone marrow with the garlic bread. But I'll do that one meal maybe a week, but mostly not. Yeah. Well, you can't.

I mean, if you do it all the time, it's a disaster. You just have to make sure you don't do it all the time. That's the thing. When I take people to Red Ash, I turn into like an ambassador. I'm like, please, show them what you guys do. And I have them bring like 10 dishes. Well, we've had a bunch of employee meetings there, especially before we started the club,

sort of bonding meetings. It's hard to not indulge at Red Ash. It's amazing. And we would tell them, just have the chef bring over anything and everything. And they would just bring over plates and stuff. It's incredible. It was amazing.

I can't wait to go back, actually. Yeah, it's a great place. Well, Austin is amazing for food and stuff. It's incredible. It was amazing. I can't wait to go back, actually. Yeah, it's a great place. Well, Austin is amazing for food. Yeah. It's amazing. It's such a good place for food. There's so many good restaurants here. Popping up all the time.

Is there already good places? And they keep having new shit here. It just keeps opening that you're like, oh my God. Have you been to Lonesome Dove? I have not. Oh my God. So good. What's the...

It's so good. They sell rattlesnake sausage. They serve good they have they sell rattlesnake sausage they serve i should say rattlesnake sausage a lot of wild game dishes there's a southern one that i went to here so fucking good i went with philip um philip lee what was the name of it um i gotta look it up okay i'll ask him there's there's so many places here man Yeah I mean his places too Oh yeah No his places are insane That Sushi by Scratch Out in

Where's that at? What's You go here Fix Fixy No I've heard that place is the shit too though Is it Ola May? Is that

Could that be it? Oh I think I don't know That Fixy That place is supposed to be fantastic. Did you say Fixie or Fix? How do you say it? Whatever it is, F-I-X-E.

Texas is probably Fixie. All right, that place is fantastic. There's so many good places out here. Have you been to ABBA? Yes. That place is great, too. Yes. Amazing.

Olame, there you go. That's it. Olame, yeah. Bro, that place is outstanding. Damn, son. That's outstanding. Amazing. They're Olamay. There you go. That's it. Olamay. Bro. Yeah. That place is outstanding. Damn, son. That's outstanding. Damn. Yeah.

Ooh. So, so good. Yeah, I went to NADC Burger last night. Which one? NADC Burger. Oh, Not a Damn Chance Burger. It's Phillip's Burger Place. It might be the best burger on earth.

So good. Oh, yeah. That's his too. It might be the best burger on earth. The only person in contention is the Golden Tiger. I want to eat two. Golden Tiger's pretty fucking good too. That one I have not been to.

And I almost got it after the club one night. Phillip told me it was the greatest burger he's ever had. That's why Phillip decided to make NADC Burger. Really?

He wanted to like perfect the American cheeseburger. Golden Tiger, is it downtown? Eastside? Yeah, Eastside. That's, is it downtown? East side? Yeah, east side. That's open late, right? Yeah, real late.

It's like a food truck and it has outdoor seating. It's amazing. I got to try it. It's so good. Fuck. I think it might be also one of my favorite, favorite things in the world is just a simply made cheeseburger. Oh, yeah.

Yeah. Last time I was there, I ate three cheeseburgers and a chicken sandwich. At Golden Tiger? Yeah. Three? Three. And a chicken sandwich. And a chicken sandwich. Fried chicken?

I might have been high. Yeah, that was an off-the-rails moment. I have my off-the-rails moments. Yeah. Phenomenal. See, that looks so good. I, like, anything fried now just ruins me. And I don't think another thing I absolutely love is a fried chicken sandwich.

You know what I really miss? Fried chicken and waffles at Roscoe's. Oh, Roscoe's. Come on, man. L.A. staple. Yeah, with the hot sauce on the chicken and the maple syrup on the waffles and the butter. Slice it up. Hope you don't get shot.

Eat it all. Look at that. Oh, man. Woo. That food is so good. It's so good. It's a wild place, too. You go there, there's a lot of people.

Like, last time I was there, there was a lot of people I knew there. A lot of comics. Yeah. A lot of dudes. Last time I was there, there was a lot of people I knew there. A lot of comics. Yeah. A lot of dudes from the store were there. I was like, this is... It's such a classic L.A. place. Yeah. Was it on Union?

Well, there's one that was near us. I say us. When we had Sunset and Gower. Yeah, that's right. It was radio. It was right down the street. So we used to get it for lunch there. It's the shit.

And yet, it's one of those things, the first time you hear it, you're like, what are you talking about? Why would you make chicken with waffles? It doesn't even make sense. And then you sit there. And yet it's one of those things the first time you hear it, you're like, what are you talking about? Why would you make chicken with waffles? It doesn't even make sense. And then you sit there. And you eat it. But it's also like the perfect chicken. Like your chicken's off the charts.

Yeah, fried chicken. But it's also, it's like that recipe. They got it down. They've been doing it forever. Yeah. They know exactly how to serve you a Roscoe's fried chicken. Yeah. You eat it like, oh, this is what I was waiting for.

Yeah, and then the sugar rush waffle. And the fucking butter. Yeah. Oh, oh. And then you dip the chicken in the fucking, oh. Maybe a little hot sauce too. Fuck it, let's go. Woo.

I need naps right after that. Naps. Yeah, your insulin crashes. Your whole body's like, what? It's all done. Your sugar crashes. What are you doing to us? What is this? And then you think, though, that there's whole body's like, what? Your sugar crashes. What are you doing to me? What is this?

And you think, though, that there's people who eat like that every day. Every day. I remember one time I had a double cheeseburger with fries and a large milkshake. It was like a large milkshake. And by the time I finished a large milkshake, I literally felt like I got poisoned. Yeah. I was like, oh. Oh. Yeah. It felt terrible. got poisoned. I was like, oh. Oh.

Yeah. It felt terrible. Of course. It was not worth it. No. There's no, it's the wildest trick your body does to you is to, especially with like a big, heavy sugar meal. Yeah.

Your body tricks you into thinking it's good while you're doing it. It does. It's totally a trick. You know that when you eat to capacity feeling and you're like, I feel sick? I think I ate like that every day for 15 years. Yeah, that's my number one problem. Yeah, I was like. But I don't do that when I eat the carnivore diet.

I don't do it. Meat has a high level of satiety, I think is the word, which means you get satiated real quickly. You know, when your body's at enough, you're like, yeah, you've had enough. You've had enough. Yeah. It's good. Then you just look over at that freezer and you're like, is there ice cream in there?

You guys got ice cream? Got to earn that ice cream, son. Ice cream is a... Yeah. That's... That's a hard one. Oh, yeah. Ice cream's good.

I'll get a whole fucking pint of that shit. I'll get in there. Yeah. I'll do the shit where, like, I see them, you know, at the grocery store. And I start grabbing. And then all of a sudden, like, the next day, Christine will be like, are there six different pints of ice cream in there? I'm like, I don't know. The kids are here.

They might like them. They're like, what are you talking about? The kids are here. The kids ate ice cream. Yeah. Yeah. Me, it was mint chocolate chip. Really?

Yeah. I actually love chocolate chip, chocolate chip. Really? Yeah. I actually love chocolate chip not mint. Really? Yes. I like chocolate chip not mint too. Yeah, that shit's my, that is my absolute favorite. I remember the first time I got high with Eddie, he took me to, we went to Baskin Robbins and I had an ice cream sundae and I was like, this is the greatest thing the world has ever

invented. A hot fudge sundae. Bro. I was like,udge sundae. Bro. I was like, it was insane. Oh. Whatever the fuck marijuana does to your senses, like, especially your sense of taste, it's insane. Oh, yeah. We used to, in college, we used to get high out of our minds.

Like, full bong rips, joints, like, just eyes bleeding. And then we would take a blender put in like a whole tub of ice cream milk and then scoops of peanut butter oh blend that up and it just felt like you were drinking peanut butter oh and when you're high and i would do it until i vomited i would drink them until i puked. Because there's no alarm that goes off. It goes stop. You're like, no, it's too. You feel like a dog, like an animal.

If you leave a dog around the food at once, it just eats until it's sick. Your body has to be so confused as to what form this food is taking too. If you're having a milkshake, there's so much sugar. And it's frozen and there's milk. Like what is this? What is this? The fuck is this? Your body has no reference. Like if your body's eating an apple, like this is a very sweet apple, but it's an apple.

I know what to do with this. Your body's eating that. It's like what the fuck is this? What is this? What is this? It's not, yeah. Like an ice cold Coca-Cola. Oh my God, your body's like give me more of that. What the fuck is this? What is this? It's not, yeah. Like an ice cold Coca-Cola. Oh my God, your body's like, give me more of that.

What the fuck is that? Also that, everyone's, we all know it, that formula at McDonald's. Why that's the best tasting Coke and Diet Coke on the planet. Why? They have it, because what happens is when you're an establishment like a restaurant, you get, you you get a formula. Like the gun has a blend. And there's definitely a different formula at McDonald's.

Oh, has there been anything written about this? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, interesting. I didn't know that. If you drive by a McDonald's and you get a Diet Coke, you'll be like, what the fuck? Okay. Typically, restaurants get their soda syrups in plastic bags, but Coca-Cola does something different for McDonald's.

The fast food chain gets their Coke syrup delivered in stainless steel tanks. According to the New York Times, the material keeps the soda fresher and your tongue can taste the difference. A thousand percent it can. Right. But is it a more potent blend or is it just because it's in the tanks? I don't know, but it does taste so much better. It says their filtration system is top tier.

It is superior. Wow, there's all these articles about it being superior. And I would say both. Like regular Coke, all of a sudden you're like, oh, man. McDonald's has an article. McDonald's does. It says, there are many reasons that Coca-Cola tastes so great at McDonald's. We simply follow the guidelines set by Coca-Cola and take steps to ensure that we serve a high-quality fountain beverage.

Well, congratulations. You do that. Yes. The water and Coca-Cola syrup are pre-chilled before entering our fountain dispensers with the ratio syrup set to allow for ice to melt. Oh, so that it doesn't get watered down with the ice. So they are making it stronger. That's smart. Doesn't this tell you something, though though that how everything is in the details

Yeah, I mean like yeah This is something that probably a restaurant would be like the coca-cola would say you should do this and they go whatever right? You know like whatever we'll just we'll just put it in the gun and and but I believe that McDonald's Sticks to that because it is consistent and it is so much different tasting even what they said about their straws Yeah, so their straws. Yeah. So their straws are typically wider than the typical straw. So you have a different amount coming in.

Yeah. Give it to me. Right in my face hole, you fuckheads. Fuck my mouth with Coke. Yeah. Yeah. Big old fat tube of it. So fucking good.

Extra syrupy, because what if the ice melts? Yeah. What if the ice melts? Even their ice is better there. They have better ice? They have better ice? They have better ice. They have filtered water, they said. There you go.

By the way, we're not paid by McDonald's for this. No. I don't even eat that stuff. But if I did, it's filet-o-fishes. Filet-o-fish. I could eat five of those fuckers. Really? I love filets-o-fishes.

I don't even know what that is. McDonald's has this thing, too, where there's a temperature swing where it goes from being the best thing you can eat at that moment to like this is dog food. You're like, throw this down. I was in California a few months ago, and I had a quarter pounder. It was actually quite a while ago, 10 months ago. And I had a quarter pounder for the first time in fucking forever.

But I was starving, and I had to eat, and I was headed to the airport, and I'm like, I'm just pulling this drive-thru real quick. I get a quarter pounder. It's so sweet. Yeah. Like, I could taste the sugar in a quarter pounder. Their bread even is, I think, sweet. Yeah, it tasted like a pastry.

Yeah. I was like, this is interesting. It was very good. Yeah. I enjoyed it. I really did. I'm a quarter pounder fan. Yeah.

I don't know what they're doing, but it's fucking delicious. That's the thing I think you really notice about certain foods when you stay away from them for a while. Is that when you reintroduce them, you go, oh, I didn't realize that I was, this tastes way different. Yeah, way different. I thought it was going to taste like an In-N-Out cheeseburger. Yeah. Like a cheeseburger. Like In-N-Out is the gold standard for me.

For fast food places, you can't fuck with In-N-Out. But they have a standard. And Five Guys. They have standards. I mean with In-N-Out. But they have a standard. And Five Guys. In-N-Out has high standards. Whether or not they are for your palate, you can't negate that they have high standards. Some people hate their fries.

How can you hate their fries? You see them chop the potatoes in the back. I just wish they did it in beef tallow because they're doing some bullshit seed oils. That's what they- Yeah, I'm sure. What does In-N-Out use oil for their fries? Everybody uses canola oil, which is basically industrial lubricant.

That stuff was invented to lube up machines. Really? Sunflower oil. Sunflower oil. Same shit. Yeah. You're not supposed to get that much sunflower oil in your body at one point in time. It's not normal.

But they definitely, I've seen them. It sounds healthy, doesn't it? It does, actually. Sunflower sounds good. That shit's not healthy. They watch them. They're chopping the produce right there. Oh, yeah.

Right in front of you. Right in front of you. The meat is fresh. It's not frozen. And you can taste it. Nice biblical verse on the bottom of the cup. Oh, that's so sweet. It's beautiful. You know what I love? Flying Dutchmans. Yeah. Yeah, that's what I it. Nice biblical verse on the bottom of the cup. Oh, that's so sweet. It's beautiful.

You know what I love? Flying Dutchmans. Yeah. Yeah, that's what I get. Yeah, that's what I get. The secret menu is really fascinating. I know, it's wild. Animal style and all that jazz.

Yeah, nothing's on, not printed though. Yeah, how do you find that out? You don't know somebody. Yeah, somebody told me about it the first time, and then I Googled it, and it's much more extensive than you, it's not like two or three things. Oh yeah, it's a shit ton of things. It's a lot of things, yeah. Things I've never even heard of before. Yeah, it told me about it the first time, and then I Googled it, and it's much more extensive than you. It's not like two or three things. Oh, yeah, it's a shit ton of things. It's a lot of things, yeah. Things I've never even heard of before.

Yeah, it's a lot. Yeah. Yeah, but it's fucking delicious. Mm-hmm. I'm a fan. I'm a fan. I also love it. But it is such a different taste, though, than a McDonald's burger.

McDonald's burger is like, it was sweet. I'd like to know how many grams of sugar is how many grams of sugars in a quarter pounder? It's gotta be I'm telling you it's gotta be from that bread to that. It's gotta be from everything It seems like it's from the ketchup to it seemed like the condiments had some sugar sugar content Yeah, just tasted like it had sugar in it. Like I'm real sensitive to that. So I eat it my room. It was good though I also love a chick-fil-a sandwich. I, I love a Chick-fil-A. Yeah. I love your wife's joke about them. She's so funny, man. Yeah, she's great.

Oh, she's so funny. Ten grams. Ten grams of sugar. Eight of it's added, though, so that might be the bread. Okay, so it's two natural and eight added, so it must be eight grams of sugar in the bread. Yeah. Yeah. That's in a quarter powder? Yeah, that's kind of a lot.

Yeah. Like a really sugary drink. Maybe it's the ketchup, even. Yeah, that's what I was saying, too. I felt like the ketchup was kind of sweet. So it's probably the bun and the ketchup. Good, though. So good.

It's a good move to put that eight grams in there. Yeah. It's so fucking good. It makes it more delicious. If you're only looking for something delicious. You ever heard of the McDonald's secret menu? No. What?

They have some weird shit on here like this. The Land, Sea, and Air Burger? It's a fish fillet, chicken, and burger. Whoa. The difference is, though, I feel like if you- They'll stab you if you order that. Yeah, if you order that, first of all, I think they'd be like, the fuck are you talking about look at this mccrape the mcgangbang shut the fuck up no way come on i swear are you serious i don't know which place is gonna really know about them but

i've seen people ask like they follow through with a video and go ask for some of this stuff what there's a weird viral thing going on right now with them because they have a grimace milkshake yeah people are making some crazy videos about what happened to me after I drank this crazy milkshake. Oh, like Red Band did with... 100%. Remember what Red Band did with Pepsi Spice? No. Did you never knew about that?

No. It's the greatest troll Red Band ever pulled off. Really? Red Band bought pepsispice.com, and then he documented his enjoying delicious Pepsi spice. And so as he's drinking Pepsi spice, he's losing weight. He's getting blood in his diarrhea. He's dying at the end.

He's making videos. This is like young red band, Pepsi spice project promo. I don't know what this has to do with anything. What does it have to do with Pepsi? Is he blowing himself? Yeah, he's in the bathroom doing stuff. So he's filming himself drinking Pepsi Spice with himself. So anyway, he bought PepsiSpice.com, and he had to give it to Pepsi after a while.

Oh, really? But I mean, I think it still exists somewhere online But they they came to him. They were like hey you motherfucker. We'll kill you Because he's kicked it went viral you know at the time like whatever viral is in the year 2001 imagine like the threat from a corporation like that the Pepsi spice project for it. The Pepsi Spice Project. Wow.

Yeah. It's very funny. Wade continues to add, I liked the stamp yesterday. I'm afraid to have sex. I keep thinking that my over-caffeinated sperm would blow a hole through the back of a girl's head. What? It's so stupid. It's so stupid. But that's the funnest thing

to do is a stupid bit. That's Red Band. He loves silly shit. Yeah. So for him, it was like the ultimate platform to find a non-sophisticated company that doesn't recognize the internet. So you didn't buy pepsispice.com before you released Pepsi Spice, you fucking idiots. Fucking idiots. Yeah.

Back then, companies didn't even care about websites. What's a website? We sell Pepsi. Even now, people still can hose. Like then companies didn't even care about websites. What's a website? We sell Pepsi. Even now people still can like hose. You see it on social media where they'll grab a Twitter handle and the company hasn't locked it down yet.

Right. People tweet like they're from that company. Well, people are tweeting like they're from Bud Light now because there's Bud Light underscore. So they're making these very subtle commercials that are like almost as like nothing goes with wieners like Bud Light. Wow. And it's like two hot dogs. I didn't realize. And people are like, what is this?

Is this real? Is this a parody account? It is a parody account. But it's subtle. I didn't realize that that, what's it called? I didn't realize that that, what's it called, them people abandoning it would be that, It's crazy.

It really has stuck. I saw an article about revenue and the share that they have of the market and how it has totally taken a shift. Like $26 billion. That's crazy. Yeah. They really $26 billion. That's crazy. Yeah. They really, really did. That's the word I was looking for. They were boycotting it.

Yeah. And then the trans movement got mad that they didn't support Dylan Mulvaney. So a lot of like LBGTQ and whatever the other letters are, those bars stopped carrying Bud Light. So it's really- Because they felt like Bud Light didn't back them up. And then there was video footage of them sponsoring a pride parade. So it's like a Bud Light parade truck with a bunch of people dancing around like, we

like to fuck guys too. And I'm like, I'm a girl. Yeah. I like to fuck girls. Like, it's whatever it is. It's like, they're like dancing around inside this. Yeah.

So now they're advertising in front of the pride people. And so then the people are like, Oh, they're fucking doubling down. It's like, they can't win. No. So the pride people are mad.

How weird is it? When you say pride, people immediately think of gay pride means gay how wild is that yeah that they did that yeah they own like it's it's it's kane velasquez has brown pride tattooed on his chest yeah now people like what are you trying to say he's gay brown what's that what are you trying to say you know it used to be you were proud right now now it's gay it's meant it definitely means queer. Wild. Pride month.

Queer month. Imagine. You don't even have to say gay pride anymore. Yeah. You say pride month. How insidious. They snuck it in. They slowly took over pride.

Like, they took over the rainbow. Yeah. Rainbows are, that is, it's so funny to think that University of Hawaii used to have rainbows on their helmets. Can't have it anymore. Well, also. Too think... Too beautiful. I think the football team was like, can we get something else? Like, it was not even related

to gay. They were like... Shouldn't we be the Tiger Sharks? Yeah, it's like, give us... And they finally changed it. What do they know? Well, I forget what the... But they put a more badass design on the helmets. But for years, it was a rainbow. Wow. Because it was like, Hawaii! And they were like, come on, man, we're supposed're supposed to be out to yeah that was on the side of a

helmet now it's the like on the bottom it's like that h you know isn't that crazy though that the rainbow has become i mean it it's a it's gay rainbow's a gay thing it was a gay yeah yeah i mean that's what it is now pride it's a's a gay thing. The word is, like, if you say you have straight pride, people are like, really? Yeah, of course. Do you really? Do you really? Yeah, you should. First of all, why?

You're 99% of the people. Proud to be straight. Fuck you proud of. Yeah. Fuck you proud of. Like, they had a straight pride parade. And I was like, if I was a gay guy trying to fuck a guy in the closet, that's where I would go. Totally, totally. I'd go to that straight pride parade and see who's a guy in the closet, that's where I would go. Totally.

I'd go to that straight pride parade and see who's yelling the loudest. Let me see who I can get over here. You want to argue? It is such a weird time, man. Such a weird time because, unfortunately, because of social media, now anything that you you can you can form an identity around it and then it can be like your identity in terms of like your source of like how you view yourself in the world you no longer view yourself in the world as just a human being that's just accepted for whatever you're interested in now you're in like a very specific category or group and then there's other people in that group and you you think there's people that are opposed to you and there are

people that are opposed to them yeah so then then you're in conflict now you're part of a gang you know it's gonna go after those people that are against us fuck them it's wild yeah it's exhausting too exhausting exhausting and people want to fight. They want to argue about shit. Don't you just feel like, I mean, I don't know, I get such mental fatigue from a lot of this stuff. I just feel like I'm an observer and I kind of put it to the side and go, I just, I can't, you can't entertain and ingest every one of these things going on. Well, that's if you're a conspiracy theorist. Yeah.

This is this is the real conspiracy. The conspiracy is have as many social problems as possible to distract people, get distracted by the people concentrate on, whether it's a pandemic, whether it's masks, vaccines, pride, trans movement, drag shows. Sponsor drag shows for kids if you want people to get mad and want people to get distracted. Right, right. Sponsor that. Let them focus on that. Get people to think that it's a good idea to do that and watch the outrage. Get people to think that the oceans are going to be boiling in five years.

Right. Get people to think that if we don't change... That was one of the things that Greta Thunberg said five years ago, that we'll all be dead. In five years? Well, it's five years later. And we're not all dead. So you're definitely wrong, and you're 16. So why are they flying you out to Ukraine? Like, what's

going on? So there's so many of these fucking social distractions that are in our face all day long about everything. And I feel like sometimes that's what I feel like about Supreme Court rulings. We're going to take away Roe v. Wade. And everybody's like, what the fuck? What?

Yeah. What? And that's another one. And then that one becomes a thing that people identify as the most important problem that they have to solve. And while all this is going on, money's getting moved around. Decisions are getting made. Yeah. And it's a is going on, money's getting moved around, decisions are getting made. Yeah. And it's a brilliant cover for wild shit. Yeah. Because all you have to do ever really is

follow the money on anything. Yeah. And you see what's actually happening and everything else is a distraction to that. Bro, I've been following this Hunter Biden shit. You see the new, he was smoking crack while he's driving 175 miles an hour to Vegas in a Porsche? Yeah, but to be fair, it was a Turbo S and those are thrilling to drive. Oh yeah, I can imagine. It's probably easy to get 175 in that fucking car. Easy. Those are amazing. That's a rocket ship.

It really is. That is a rocket ship. Those are incredible. And the way that thing handles, oh my goodness. You get behind the Turbo S and tell me you don't want to hit 175. Yeah. Especially if there's like no one there. Not only that, if there's hookers at the Turbo S and tell me you don't want to hit 175. Especially if there's, like— No one there. Not only that. If there's hookers at the end of it.

And you're on crack. Yeah. And he's smoking crack while he's driving 175. Wow. Now, he really has substantial issues. I mean, with—because I'm saying I— Or he's lived the dream. What's the dream?

Yeah. What's the dream? If you're a fucking total degenerate, what's the dream? Smoking crack, getting hookers, driving fast as fuck, and making millions of dollars through illegal activity because your dad's rich. 175. But also this fucking thing of like, he's always filmed doing this. He films himself.

That's what I'm saying. Self-imposed. So then he posted it. No, no, no They I think they found it but who knows what's real anymore? That's another problem like any video you see today going through so he's going through the desert doing uh-huh Yeah, but a lot of people do do that. Yeah. No, no, I know people are it's a famous place for people driving fast That's booking though. That's oh, yeah I've hit a hundred and a little over

That's booking, though. That's different. Oh, yeah. He's booking. I've hit 100 and a little over. Mm-hmm. 175 is really- 175 is insane. Things are coming so quick.

That's really, really moving, man. I mean, what's the top end of that car? It's probably like 200. Yeah. Probably like a little over that. But yeah. 175 is so fast. Shit.

Life in the Fast Lane. How reckless Hunter Biden photographed himself driving, and he's photographing it while he's going 172. God. While behind the wheel of his Porsche en route to days-long Vegas bender with prostitutes and pictured himself smoking crack while behind the wheel. Wow. Oh, so it was back in 2018, but he just released it.

Oh, leave him alone. It was just a few years ago. Damn. It was years ago. Look at him. Imagine partying with that dude. I almost had a chance to get that guy on the podcast. Really?

Yeah, man. They reached out when his memoir was coming out, but then all the shit hit the fan about him. I was like, nah, I'm not really interested. And then I started reading all the stuff he did. I was like, oh, my God, he's insane. Yeah, that's crazy. Yeah, look at that. Hot.

He's driving in a residential neighborhood smoking crack. Well, he's in a residential neighborhood. And that's no turbo. So that's, is that, what is that? Oh, that's a turbo S. No, I meant like if the odometer was, if that one is. I think that's a different car. Yeah.

Yeah, look at it. Well, it's an automatic too. But it says manual, see, M. It might have a manual setting. Yeah, he's in D and then maybe. But it's an automatic, too. But it says manual. See? M. It might have a manual setting. Yeah, he's in D and then maybe. Who fucking has a... Do they have... I don't know.

Yeah, because they let you, like, head it over. Right. Power shifters. I don't know if that's the same car. I don't know if it is, either. Jeez. Woo, hoes. In different area codes.

Why would you film it? Because he's having a party. That's true. When he's an old man, he wants to look back. Yeah, I didn't go to Bohemian Grove, but you know what I did? I smoked street crack with hookers in Vietnam. Oh, there's a... Tells a prostitute he had a laptop stolen.

Oh, no. And then he's talking to her while he's recording it? Well, that dude was off the charts, out of his mind. Yeah, Crackle at Crack is... I mean, he was out of his mind. I mean, he was basically like Ray Liotta looking for helicopters all day long. I talked to one time about Dr. Drew, because, you know, he's worked with so many drug users, about the different drugs, right, and, like, how they can affect your brain.

drugs right and like how they can affect your affect your brain and he said that there's certain drugs that most people most could like do try and and basically you could try it and you might be able to just be like i did that and go on with your life, right? Right. And not have an addiction. And of course, he's not saying to do that. Right. He's saying it's possible. But he said the one that has the highest probability to switch something in most people's brains where the chemical composition, it's like a light switch hits where you'll never be the same is crack. It's like a light switch hits where you'll never be the same as crack.

He said crack, people that are completely fine trying this and trying that. He said that's the one where you can do it and just everything, forever your brain has changed and will be basically in the pursuit of crack. The next Sober October we should do. Do crack. We should smoke crack before October. Like right before it. See who cannot smoke crack through the whole month of October. That'd be a real challenge. I don't think it would.

Norman said he smoked crack once. He said he hated it. But what Drew was saying is that like- Oh, but no, no, no. Wait a minute. Norman ate crack because he thought it was Molly. Remember? Remember? Yeah. Someone gave him crack and he thought it was Molly remember remember

yeah someone gave him crack and he thought it was Molly really and so he just ate it with his girlfriend at the Louvre in Paris at the Louvre in Paris

yeah was it the Eiffel Tower or the Louvre one of them places they're in Paris so he's having a he's like hey we're gonna have

a good time take this Molly I got off a fucking stranger and it's crack fuck I'm like Norman why are you doing drugs off of strangers yeah yeah but then he ate it and ari tried to give me some acid once off a stranger no i'm gonna have some of this acid you want some i go you're gonna give me acid from a stranger

i go do you know how that story turns out i didn't give a fuck yeah or you don't give a fuck i have a business to run yeah I have employees. I have a family. People thirsting on stage. Yeah. You don't even have kids, you fuckhead. Yeah. I'm not doing straight acid with you. No way.

If you do that acid, and then tomorrow I'll do that acid if you're still alive. Yeah, yeah. Tell me how that went. Yeah. Did he do it? He probably did. He did it. Yeah.

Yeah, we went to see Roger Waters. It was fine. Yeah. Yeah. It was pretty good acid. Pretty good. Missed out on the best time. Yeah, for sure. He wasn't a giggle fest. He did cry a bunch. He did. Yeah. Yeah. It was a pretty good hazard. Pretty good. Missed out on the best time. Yeah, for sure.

He wasn't a giggle fest. He did cry a bunch. He did? Yeah. He cried at how amazing the Roger Waters show was. It made me uncomfortable. Yeah, but he was on hazard. He was fine.

I know, but I was like, why is he so sad? Jamie locked up. It was so good. Roger Waters was so good. They do. Oh, yeah. Oh, it was so good. And then we all hung out afterwards.

Yeah, I was so jealous. You texted me that day or the day before. Roger Waters is my homie. No, I know. We text each other all the time. I wanted to go. You asked me, and I was out of town. I was like, fuck, I would love to do that.

It's one of the weirdest of my homies. My famous homies that text me every now and then. I get a text from Roger Waters. I'm like, holy shit, man. Yeah. That's Roger fucking fucking waters man yeah first time i made out with a girl when i was 13 i heard comfortably numb and yeah and now he's sending you texts become comfortably numb oh my god what a band what a band what a fucking artist he is. And a guy who's a really well-thought-out guy, really well-versed in international affairs. Yeah, he's definitely not just spouting bullshit. He's not that old, rich guy who is detached and just famous now.

He's not that guy at all. He's a real artist. He can play pool, too. Can he? Yeah. Yeah, he plays good. Yeah, he plays good. Yeah, he plays good. Yeah, he wanted to play.

Oh, really? He's like, I'll play you some pool. Come on, let's play pool. I was like, you play pool? He's like, I play very good. I was like, no fucking way. I was like, holy shit, Roger Waters can play some pool. He knows how to move the rock.

Does he have a set-up table at the shows and everything? Yeah, but I got a fucking, the problem with this table out here is like, if you don't know what that is, it's a, it's a, it's like a gimmick table almost. Oh. It's, it's a super tight pro table. Yours? Yeah. Mine has four inch pockets.

So like if you're like used to regular pool tables. What do they have? Five, five and a half. Oh. Yeah. And a bar. Yeah. Yeah.

These are, these are four like. Yeah, and a bar. Yeah. Yeah, these are four, like... So it's for, like, good shit playing. Yeah, yeah. That's what the pros play on? Dominguez, cut. It's, like, the perfect... It's, like, it's a gold crown. You still do it a lot?

Oh, every day. I'm not the junkie. I'm a junkie. Oh, you are? I've got a problem. I didn't realize that. Yeah, two of my security guys are good. Oh, really?

Yeah, yeah, we play hard. Nice. Yeah. Yeah. I didn't realize that. Yeah, two of my security guys are good. Oh, really? Yeah, yeah, we play hard. Nice. Yeah. Yeah, I don't know. We battle. Yeah, we have good, yeah, I'm getting better. I'm probably playing better now than I've ever played. Really?

Yeah, I'm playing really good. When did you start getting into it? Well, I tore my ACL when I was like 22, and that's when I first started playing pool. Oh, okay. because I couldn't do martial arts anymore it was fucked up for a while and then I got surgery yeah I had to get surgery but I didn't get surgery for like it was a while maybe more than six months and then um then there's a long rehab the ACL reconstruction was a long rehab for me um but I but I wasn't doing martial arts at the time at all so all i was doing was

going to the gym like i went to like a regular you know fitness gym and i just lift some weights do the stair machine you know it was rehabbing my knee all by myself and then you know because i kind of knew what to do just doing mostly body weight squats and slowly building up my ability and being smart about it and then during the time i got obsessed with pool i just fucking obsessed a buddy of mine worked at a pool hall he had a part-time job at a pool hall this guy was a my comic friend john and so we used to play all the time we both kind of sucked you know it was fun just talking shit laughing playing and we do gigs together and stuff and then i started meeting really good players and then i started playing all the time

and then i started then i had a real problem to the point where my manager goes i think you're spending more time thinking about pool than you are about comedy i was like fuck you're right yeah i knew he was right i knew he was right because i was playing in tournaments like several times a week wow yeah oh it was a problem i was playing eight hours a day eight hours a day wow i never knew this about you every day every day if Eight hours a day. Wow. Every day. I never knew this about you. Every day. Every day. If pool was a legitimate profession at the time,

like back then it was very hard to make a living. And then there was this camel tour, and it wound up being a shit show, and a lot of people didn't get the money. You would have gotten into it. 100%. If I could have been a professional pool player, I was obsessed. I loved it.

You know why? Because the balls don't give a fuck. They don't give a fuck who's watching. They don't give a fuck how cool you are. They don't give a fuck what you're dressed like. They don't give a fuck if somebody likes you. If you make that shot, you make that shot. And to keep your nerves together and navigate around the table was a puzzle to me.

I was fascinated by it because it's just this, this you're in tune with these balls colliding with these other balls and trying to find the proper angle and plotting out the table in advance to get the good angle and the next ball to get the good angle on the next ball. It was just obsessive. Did you, did you get into trick shots and all that too? Nope.

Couldn't give a fuck. Get out of here with that shit. I didn't want to learn it. I don't care. It doesn't mean anything. It was just about cleaning the table. If you get a trick shot and you get to kill yourself if you don't make it, then I'll watch. Okay.

There's no consequences. There's no consequences if you miss a trick shot. I don't give a fuck if you miss a trick shot. I don't give a fuck if you miss a trick shot. I don't give a fuck if you make it. It's kind of cool to see someone has a really powerful draw stroke, and they can do these crazy trick shots. But you're talking about just... It's nonsense.

What you really want to see is people playing pool at the highest level. You have to keep your nerve. Pool players consider... Because I know there's multiple games. I've played amateur, obviously, like hanging out. But some people play, what, eight ball? What's the standard game called? Well, there's two main rotation games, and there's one big gambling game.

The big gambling game is a game called One Pocket. And the reason why it's a big gambling game is because it's a very complicated game. It's boring to watch unless you're a real aficionado that can never put it on television. And what one pocket is, is say if this is the pool table. I have this pocket here on the right-hand side. You have this pocket here on the left-hand side. And I only can make balls in this one pocket. You can only make balls in that pocket.

And so there's 15 balls. There's 15 balls in that pocket. And so there's 15 balls. Yeah. There's 15 balls in a rack. So when someone makes eight, that means they've made more than half, so they won the game. And then to make handicaps, like say if you and I were playing and you don't play as good as me, I'd say, okay, I have to make 10 balls. You only have to make five. We'll do it something like that. Or I have to make 13 balls.

You only have to make two. Yeah. People make crazy matches like that in that way and they gamble for a lot of money i've seen one pocket games for thousands and thousands of dollars yeah big money now that's not but that sounds like what like legit players play but most people play most people play nine ball well in leagues a lot of people play eight ball okay like a lot of bar table eight ball. Okay. Like a lot of bar table eight ball. Yeah.

Which is a little complicated because bar table eight ball, you have to have really good cue ball control because you're dealing with a lot of clusters. So you have to know how to move the ball around. Right. It seems easier because you don't have long shots because the table's small, and it is. It's easier for that. But it's harder for position play because you have very small room for error. Yeah. And so you develop a real good sense of where the cue ball is going.

A lot of bar table players have a real solid cue ball. And then there is tournament play. And tournament play is generally, usually either eight ball or nine ball rather and ten ball for the pros. So it's a rotation game. Nine ball I'm familiar with. Nine ball, the balls are wild. Right. So nine ball, you break, you make the nine ball on the break, that's a game. Nine ball I'm familiar with. Nine ball, the balls are wild. So nine ball, you break,

you make the nine ball on the break, that's a game. You won. You make a one-nine combination, you win. Ten ball, no balls are wild. So unless you play it wild. There's different ways people can play, but generally speaking, it's call shot. You have to call every shot you make. So the one, if you're making a one-five combination, you call the five-ball combination. No bullshit. No bullshit. Yeah. You can get lucky occasionally.

And the way you get lucky is, say, if you call that corner pocket and you miss but it bounces off the rail, hits the other rail, and comes back in that corner pocket, it still counts. It still counts. It's a fluke. You got the luckiest of lucky, but only because you actually called the pocket. I got you. It really shouldn't even count then.

You should really say how you do it, but that's not how it works. Yeah. And then there's games where you play the 10 ball counts on the break, and that's a win, but most of the times they don't. Most of the time they spot it. You have more, I realize this, I've realized this over time, but even now, you have more obsessions than most people I know, I think. Yeah, I got a lot of them.

than most people I know, I think. Yeah, I got a lot of them. But, like, a lot of people have none or maybe, like, one. But, like, you are kind of obsessed with a number of things. Yeah, I could get obsessed with anything. Anything good. But, I mean, like, you're kind of obsessed with stand-up. You've definitely been obsessed with jiu-jitsu.

You're kind of obsessed with archery. Yeah, I just came from the archery shop. Yeah. That's a lot. I mean, it's a lot of different disciplines that you're, or, you know, things that you are trying to master. I'm mentally ill. Yeah. Fitness.

That's another one. Yeah. But I'm mentally ill in a very productive way. That's true. Yeah. It's not a mental illness where it wrecks my life. It enhances my life. Yeah.

But it's just, I know how to like focus on it. It's like, it's like like focus it's like it's like like it's say it's like saying i have a 900 horsepower engine that's why i keep crashing all the time yeah like no you need to know how to handle 900 horsepower if you know how to handle 900 horsepower and you're a race car driver then you have a massive advantage yeah because then you have all this horsepower yeah you you could fucking go that's me yeah it's just like i just have to find things to put that in if i's just like I just have to find things to put that in

if I'm just like sitting around doing nothing my brain just starts plotting chaos I just start thinking dark things I just start plotting

scenarios it's not good I don't I can't I don't trust my brain to be by itself you know it's like

that's why for me it's easier like when I say just fucking work out just go do it you'll feel better I know it's why for me it's easier to like when I say just fucking work out. Just go do it. You'll feel better. I Know it's easier for me to say that yeah, it's easier for me to say that cuz I'm crazy Yeah, because I have to do it. I know I have to do it I go out there and I do whatever I have to do and then I can manage all that other stuff But if I don't I can get locked into when I was playing pool for eight hours a day, or I used to get into video games like that, or I'd play video games or

jujitsu. The thing about jujitsu is you can't really do it all day long. Your body breaks down. Yeah. I did as much as I could, but your body starts to break down. What's a good session for like- Couple hours. Couple hours. Couple hours. Yeah. You know, you do like an hour of drills and then you probably roll for an hour. Yeah. But yeah yeah more than that your body's you're so beat an hour of trying to stop people from strangling you and breaking your arm

and fucking ripping your neck off your head yeah it's fucking exhausting that's real work it's exhausting yeah you get so tired that's why jiu-jitsu people are so chill yeah they get it all out they don't have nothing you meet them in real life, they're like, hi. They have no bravado, chest puffiness. They're just fucking chilled out. Yeah. I mean, the bit of boxing stuff I've done, too, it's completely exhausting, too. Same thing. Yeah, same thing.

You meet a boxer in real life, they're generally pretty fucking chilled out. Yeah. Especially when it's training all the time. Yeah. That training is crazy. chilled out. Especially when it's training all the time. There's nothing for me quite like hitting a bag for a workout that puts me in a great state

of mind. Like a great mood. Doing rounds on a bag. By the time I'm done, I feel so good. It gets everything out. Smiley. I'm all happy. Yeah. It just drains all that monkey energy out of. Yeah. It just drains all that monkey energy out of my body. It just drains all that caveman out.

And when you hit clean combos. Boom. Boom. Boom. Boom. Boom. Boom. At the end, you're like, oh, I can't.

Yeah. It's good. It's a good feeling. I like going ham. Yeah. Yeah. It's fun. Well, you're doing the kicks, too.

Yeah. Yeah. Finally, I can do them Well, you're doing the kicks too. Yeah. Yeah. Finally, I could do them again. My knee's back. It took forever. That's another thing that happened with this fucking diet. It's like whatever weird joint pains I was having just went away. Really?

I used to have occasional joint pain in my right knee too. Gone. Don't feel it at all. Not at all. Same workouts. Same stuff. I think I was carrying around a bunch of inflammation just from eating i mean mostly clean mostly clean you know but i'll eat

four cheeseburgers one night or mostly clean i'll have a fucking large bowl of spaghetti mostly clean but every now and then i'll go off the rails to not going off the rails at all remember one day i just felt like shit and i just decided was last time. I felt really good physically I was like there's a time that I did that carnivore diet. Yeah, so I'm like, let me do that again The thing that's most astonishing to me is the mental benefits of it when your brain is running on ketones It's a different feeling. It's a feeling like you're on a nootropic. It's like you're on alpha brain It's it's a feeling like you're on a nootropic. It's like you're on a alpha brain. It's, it's a feeling like you get like a little extra room for thinking. Yeah. A little extra room for forming

sentences, for just even comprehension, understanding. I have more mental energy. I think it's a more efficient form of energy than carbohydrates are. I did find that, um, you know, I would, I'd have that I'd have joint pain, and when I was at the house and I'd feel that way, that was another benefit of that feeling after cold plunging was alleviating. Oh, yeah. My knees would be sore from hitting the bike for a while or squats,

and then you're like, damn, it really does feel alleviated. Oh, yeah, your body loves that. Let's get that inflammation out of there. There's a lot of people that talk about there not being scientific benefit. And I literally hear it in their voice, that they're trying not to go in there. Yeah.

Let's just say it doesn't do anything for you physically. What it does for you mentally is inarguable. It's inarguable. There's real science behind it. It ramps up your dopamine by 200% and it lasts for hours. Yeah. And the epinephrine or epinephrine. And it carries through the rest of your day. No, and that's why I was, for me, a big proponent of in the morning. Yeah. Start your day that way. Fuck yeah. It's a great way to warm up too.

It wakes you up and then I warm up through, I make my body get warm while it's freezing. Yeah, I mean that morning fog that we all feel, I mean I keep telling people, there's no cup of coffee like that 30 fucking five degree water. Nothing. There's nothing that will get you going like that. Nothing. I mean, you can experience a version of it if you've ever jumped into like a lake or something, you know, like in a cool, like that feeling you're like, whoa, dude, I was kind of

burnt out the other day. I did, know bunch of podcasts in a row and then I Had real hard work out that day, and I was just crashed and I came home. I was like man I got two shows tonight whoo. I got a I got a get I'm gonna get in the tank I'm gonna get in the cold, and I just got in there for three minutes. I got out I was like whoa. Yes fucking go yeah Yeah, I went to the the club, and they're like why so fucking energetic. Oh dude. I went to the club and they're like, why are you so fucking energetic? I go, dude, I was tired today. I was crashing.

And then I got in that cold plunge. Now I feel fucking fantastic. Game changer. Game changer. Yeah. Yeah, and just get, if you only have a bathtub, get a bathtub, fill it with cold water, throw some ice in there. Just do it. It doesn't have to be complicated.

Yeah, you really will feel amazing. Throw some ice in there. Just do it. It doesn't have to be complicated. Yeah, you really will feel amazing. Yeah. And the fun thing is I've had people come over and, you know, you can't help it. You're talking about it. They see it.

They're like, what is that? And I talk to them and then there's people who go, fuck that. Like they're like, I'm not doing that. Almost everybody. Yeah. And then I've had friends that go like, all right, I want to try it. And they get excited about it. And everyone who's actually gone through and done it

has a huge smile on their face afterwards. Yeah, they start laughing afterwards. Yeah, they love it. I paid my daughter and her friends $1,000 for every minute they can go in there for. What? See, of 11-year-olds. Did they do it?

Yes. Really? Freaking, trying to get $1,000 bucks and I peeled off 10 crisp hundreds. And then they were laughing and giggling and the parents were like, what are you doing? I'm like, it's fun. It's fun. It's okay.

Are you sure? Like, yeah, it's fun. Everybody had a good time. That's cool. I did it for fun. At 11 too. Yes. That's like giving an 11 year old a hundred thousand dollars.

Yes. I was like, what am I going to do? That's why I wanted to do it. But it's also, they were all laughing afterwards. Yeah. It was like everyone was laughing. am i that's why i wanted to do it i was like but it's also it's they were all laughing afterwards yeah it was like everyone was laughing and that's fucking cool it was fun that they did it because it's a hard thing to do sure but yeah that's not just a minute yeah you can do it grand he could i told tony i'd give him a thousand dollars for every minute did he do it he won't do it he won't go tony he can make 10 grand he's like no body fat he'll experience it differently than most people.

He's so lean. His balls would crawl right up into his nostrils. Yeah, up into his vagina. He's so thin, like, lean. Yeah, he's very lean. Yeah. He's a little hummingbird. Yeah, he really is.

He's go, go, go. Amazing. That show we did with him was incredible. Insane. go go go amazing that show we did with him was incredible insane

the fact that that Kill Tony started out in the belly room at the comedy store to a half filled crowd where they were just kind of finding their legs

and I remember doing it back then to seeing it now where they did it in front of that sold out Moody Theater yeah

look at that that photo was insane when he's on stage like that the roar from the crowd was fucking incredible it was incredible we had he was sitting on my lap david lucas and ron white it was amazing it was but it was also like it felt so good to see yeah this show become yeah you know this immensely popular thing they're doing doing the fucking HEB Arena for New Year's Eve.

Right. And I, like, I'd done the show before at the clubs, you know, at, like, the store and the Vulcan. And when he's, like, I'm doing it at ACL, I was like, really? I kind of didn't really understand what it would be. Dude, that show really was a flawlessly entertaining show. It was amazing. It was really, it was so, I told him this, like it was so well produced.

Yeah. Like you guys put, like there was, it felt like this is a show that you guys put on in this space every week. Right. It was like flawlessly done from the music, you know the visuals the video

yeah I mean they had graphics for everybody coming out and it was like timed well it was incredible

it was really good it was incredible yeah yeah Holtzman went up and crushed it's so nice having him here

so ridiculous it's so nice having him here it's so nice yeah it's awesome that he's here now also watching people try to figure him out like what the fuck like people don't know where they're getting into they don't know these are jokes yeah do you understand i don't really believe these things he's such a nice guy too he's the best yeah he's a sweetheart yeah and you know

finally he feels like he has a place where he can go up and he has big crowds and he's appreciated he's having a great time it's really cool yeah the club you've built is amazing dude it's pretty wild dude it's pretty wild it's wild it's just weird when even when i'm there i'm like is this real fucking it's a real treat what chapter of the simulation am i in yeah it's fucking it's a real treat. What chapter of the simulation am I in? Yeah. It's fucking... It's a fun thing to have here, man. Well, it's beautiful what's become of this community now. It's like a surreal, thriving comedy community. I also think that having two open mic nights a week is huge.

Yeah. I love that Bottom of the Barrel show you guys do. That's a fun one. It's perfect with Brian hosting it too. Yeah. Brian's the man. Such a great guy. I'm so happy he's out here.

He's filming his special At the Mothership in August. He is? Mm-hmm. He's one of my favorite comedians. He's fantastic. Yeah. I knew it the first time I saw him too. There's weird things like that where you can see someone

and you're like, hey, wait a minute. Yeah, he was a Tommy Buns recommendation. Yeah. Yeah, you recommended like hey wait a minute yeah he was a tommy buns recommendation yeah yeah you recommended him to me yeah i was like i'll check him out and the moment i saw i was like oh okay this guy's good as soon as i saw him yeah there's also specials i was thinking about that like i remember watching specials and just knowing first time uh netflix sent me in of Burt's first special for them. And I told him, I was like, you're definitely going to go to theaters. And he was like, really?

I go, 100%. I could just tell watching. First time I was watching Nate Bargatze's first one on there, I paused it at like 15 minutes. And I was like, you're about to go do Big Rooms. He was like, I hope so. I go, no, definitely. Nate Bargatze just sold out 19,000 seats. Yeah, at like the Bridgestone or whatever it's called.

Yeah. I mean, I feel like you watched them. And I felt the same thing when I saw Shane's YouTube special. I remember I go, dude, it was like after the 15-minute mark, I was like, oh, I'm really into it. Like I could tell the way I was watching it. I was like I'm really into like I could tell the way I was watching it I was like

oh this is really good yeah and I watched the whole thing I was like I'd never sit through specials I was just laughing the whole time I was like

these are all such good like I was so engaged so entertained laughing I was like this is this is legit a really good special

yeah you can just tell sometimes yeah you can tell sometimes it's nice. It's a good time for comedy. A lot of good comedy going on. Shane's new shit's funnier than ever. It's way funnier than his YouTube special.

Really? His YouTube special was amazing. His new shit is fucking insane. That's great. It's insane. I think that shoots soon. I think that's what it is. He just shot it.

Oh, he shot it? He just shot it in San Diego. Oh, great. Yeah. Like last week. That'll be huge for him. Yeah. It's amazing what that YouTube one did for him, though.

I know. It's a wild time. Did you see that Roseanne's podcast with Theo got pulled from YouTube for hate speech? That's so funny. I had something with them like a year or two ago. This is so insane. I'm going to send this to you, Jamie, so we can go over what it is that got them banned. Because it's so crazy.

I can't even understand it. I don't even understand how this could possibly be real. I'm going to send it to you here. So here is the thing on Twitter. He put it on Twitter now because that's really the only place you could put something like that if it gets pulled from YouTube, which is.

So they pulled the whole episode though. They pulled the whole episode for this, for this clip. So we're going to watch this clip. And this is, it's really, I just don't understand how someone could think that this kind of censorship is okay. Well, hopefully like they'll go through the, if you go through the flagging process.

I don't know. Let's go. He can't post for a week. Go full screen, please. In 2012, one of my platform things was I will outlaw bullshit. Yeah. Because, you know,

and I know that horrified people because what will they do now? Right. They're addicted to it. They'd rather have that than food or a happy family they're so addicted to their fucking bullshit it's true huh but you know comics i think we're the less free speech art form and as long as we're performing things end as bad as they could be you know i think that's true as long as we're performing things aren't as bad as they could be. Yeah. And that's always been the case throughout time,

like with jesters or with people that we try and speak up and share. There's always been a ceiling on speech, hasn't there, in a way? Of course. Nobody wants to hear the real truth. They're horrified now. They're ready to go with bullshit. It's easier. Like for the real truth, and I'm glad that they did set up all

these guidelines so that we only are allowed to speak the truth and the truth is that biden got 81 million votes by winning 36 counties and that is just incredible it really really is. And that of these 81 million supporters who gave him more more votes than any president has ever gotten before, he came with a mandate from these 81 million voters. And, you know, I'm just glad that they were very careful to make sure that nobody could detract from that proven truth. You know what I mean? Like, what do you mean? Like that nobody... The deal's not getting in? Yeah.

That they mandated that that was the truth and that nobody could say, well, what about... No. Oh, it was made a mandate. Yeah. Oh, I didn't know that. So the government made it a mandate? Yeah, because, you know, YouTube did

and so did all the social... Oh, so you can't speak, you can't even speak on that in those platforms? No, you can't say, you know... That it wasn't? You can't say that, like, you know, there was election... The election was rigged, or... Yeah, that's all a lie. The election was not rigged.

36 counties can give you 81 million votes. Right. That's a fact. So it wasn't rigged? Of course not. Yeah. 36 counties have 81 million people in them. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

See? That's the truth. And don't you dare say anything against it or you'll be off YouTube, Facebook, Twitter, and all the other ones because there's such a thing as the truth and facts and we have to stick to it. And, you know. It's scary.

And that is the truth. And nobody died in the Holocaust either. That's the truth. It should happen. Six million Jews should die right now because they cause all the problems in the world, but it never happened. But it never happened. Yeah.

Mandated. Well, you're part Jewish, right? She is 100%. I'm all Jewish. You're all Jewish. 100%. And a lot of Hollywood is Jewish, yeah? It's like a lot of Hollywood is a Jewish business, really.

Well, they started Hollywood. Yeah. Right. So was it weird that- Just like rap. Black people started rap. Yeah. So I wouldn't go over there and try to get in rap and weird just like rap black people started rap yeah so I wouldn't go over there and try to get in rap and go all these black people you know go on Saturday Night Live like Dave Chappelle uh I'm just saying a lot of black people are in control of rap right

hello well you went there you try to get in show business of course it's Jewish but know, and people should be glad that it's Jewish, too, because if Jews were not controlling Hollywood, all you'd have was fucking fishing shows. Yeah. See what I'm saying? That's hilarious. So that. That's kind of a full ride. That got them pulled. The episode pulled and he can't post for a week and it's a strike against his account mm-hmm it's all based on the actual Holocaust line for

sure it has to be but she's she's Jewish she is she it's obvious she's Jewish she's always been Jewish it's also obvious if you're listening that when she says yeah but the hawk I meant like that many Jews should die and that she said it after she said this thing where she's clearly poking fun at Biden saying, but by the way, I think you can make 81 million if you win those counties. I don't know the math.

I don't know the math. Is that real? Like what is a, how many counties did Biden win? Does that matter? Look, if you don't think that people voted for Biden because they hated Trump and that 81 million people hated Trump, you're not paying attention. Yes, it's it's like, I don't know if there was some shenanigans with the election. I guarantee you it wasn't zero percent.

Yeah. Like if you said, like, how much voter fraud was it? It's never zero. But it's never zero. That's the point. It's never zero. zero but it but it's never zero that's the point ever it's it's never zero but it's also in i mean if you do all the research that you can the valid studies and the reports even from like hardcore pro republican counties that it's it's like fractional voter fraud people like to right

it's probably zealots that work inside the organization that figured out a way to like, oh, this county's got to hide these ballots. It's not substantial. It was a very small amount of counties. I don't know about 36 being accurate. OK, so with over 81 million votes, Biden received the most votes of any presidential candidate in history. history is also true that he won a record low number of counties, but counties vary by population size from those with a few hundred people to others with millions of residents. So county wins don't correlate with popular vote. Right. But if you only win 30, if you have 81 million votes and 31 counties, how many? 36. 36 counties? That's what she was saying. In this it says that he won 477 counties and Trump won 2,000 counties or something.

Oh, so he won 477. Yeah. That's a lot more than 31. It's different than what she was saying. Okay. So why would she say that? She probably got just that information wrong. 509 versus 2,500.

Oh, so he won 509 counties. That's a lot of counties. That makes sense. Look, I know people that voted for Biden that wish they didn't now. Yeah. But I do know a lot of people voted for Biden. I don't know whether or not. Look, there's some real problems with these voting machines.

I mean, the other thing that that article is saying right there that you're looking at is that Trump won like 2,400 counties. Right. So it's a substantially higher number of counties, but he's also winning a lot of those counties in like rural areas. Yeah, like they were saying. Yeah. Yeah. But there was a thing that they just released about the Dominion voting system, that it's susceptible to being hacked. What was that?

See if you can find that. There's something that just got released about the Dominion system. Did I tell you about when we got one, by the way, YouTube struck us? Struck you guys? For what? We had a guest on.

This was like on an old podcast. This was like a couple years ago. And the guest, I think it was Derek Delgado. I think that's how you say his name. I don't want to get it wrong. But he was telling me about growing up and how he was getting taunted at school. This is like a serious conversation.

And he's like, yeah, you know, getting bullied at school. Kids are calling me a fag, blah, blah, blah. Took the episode down, hate speech. Wow. But he's telling the story about being bullied. Georgia won't update vulnerable Dominion software until after 2024 election. See, that was it. There's something about the software being vulnerable.

This is on CNN. Georgia election officials have been aware of existing vulnerabilities in the state's voting software for more than two years, but continue to insist the system is safe and won't be updated until after 2024, according to a report that was unsealed this week as part of a controversial court case in Georgia. The report's findings focus on weaknesses in software for certain Dominion voting machines. Those weaknesses were previously verified by federal cybersecurity officials who urged election officials across the country to update their systems. systems. A lawyer for Georgia's top election official, Republican Secretary of State Brad Raffensperger, recently told a federal court that officials would forego installing Dominion security patches until after the 2024 presidential election. Why? The election officials, Georgia

election officials insist that it's highly unlikely that the vulnerabilities will be exploited in real attacks. Well, when you have fucking write about it on CNN, doesn't that make it more likely? I mean, yeah. Why are you sharing this? Upgrading the system would be a massive undertaking and our election officials are evaluating the scope of and time required for the project. Mike Hassinger, a spokesperson for the Georgia Secretary of State's office told CNN when asked about the delay. So they might do it. And also we're spending this time evaluating. Right. It's extremely unlikely that any bad actor will be able to exploit our voting systems in the real world. The system is secure. Oh, well, if you say so. Gabriel Sterling, a top election official in the

Georgia Secretary of State's office, said in a press release from earlier this month, adding that safeguards are already in place to mitigate these hypothetical scenarios from happening. Well, I'll sleep like a baby now. Yeah. George is fine. Yeah, man. They're people, right?

And the same kind of fucking people that don't put their syrup in a chilled container and don't have an extra big straw. Yeah. Those fucking people, they work for Jack in the Box. That's right. That's right. You get that bullshit ass Diet Coke. This seems like you'll reference this article when something does happen. Yeah. Those fucking people, they work for Jack in the Box. That's right. That's right. You get that bullshit ass Diet Coke. This seems like you'll reference this article when something does happen.

Yeah. And the system is exploited. And they'll go, well, we weren't aware. Well, that's the first that I've even heard of them even sharing how vulnerable their system is. I've never heard that. The systems are vulnerable because they're electronic. Yeah. And I would imagine like all systems

yeah electronic yeah it's a computer system people get in but that was a big thing with the republicans this is a republican too right this is a republican yeah but that was a big thing with the republicans back when dubby was president because there was people that thought that john kerry should have won remember that that was the the dangling ch that? That was the dangling chads. Remember that shit? Yeah, dangling chads was, was it Kerry and then George W.? Wasn't it? Yeah, I think it was Kerry.

Or was it him and Gore? Maybe it was Gore. There's a slightly different thing in the chat. Yeah, I think it was Gore. There's something with voting machines in Ohio. There's a giant book with tons of data about this that I've found way since and after the fact. But it was too late. They were fact, but it was like too late. They were like, sorry, it's too late. Everything's already happened.

Okay, look at this. In 2006, scroll back down, scroll back down. In 2006, Ohio became the poster child for bad election administration when two lengthy reports examining, say that word. Cuyahoga. Cuyahoga County's election procedures uncovered multiple

serious problems. The county lost 812 voter access cards that allowed a voter to cast a ballot on machines. It also lost 313 keys to the memory card compartments where the votes are stored on the machines. Oh, Jesus Christ. And pick up the memory cards that contain the votes. Wow. They hired taxi drivers. They hired taxi drivers to drive to election precincts and pick up the memory cards that contain the votes. Wow. They hired taxi drivers. They hired taxi drivers to drive to election precincts and pick up the memory cards that contain the votes. Taxi drivers. Cracked out

taxi drivers. In Cleveland. In Cleveland. In Cuyahoga County, it's Cleveland. So there was a documentary that HBO had on called Hacking Democracy, and it was about the Diebold machines. Do you remember the Diebold machines? I remember that name. I don't remember when that was. Diebold is a company that made voter machines. I think they made ATMs too. Because I remember seeing an ATM machine and thinking about that documentary. But they showed in the documentary that the machines were exploitable by a third party and that there was a third party access. It's like a third party could alter the vote. And they altered the vote on the machine on the show.

On the show. They showed on the show how they did it. But we didn't have widespread abuse of this in the last election. I mean, from everything that I've read and seen, it's not been reported that this is, even from, like I'm saying, from Republican counties. It's not something that I've heard where it's compelling enough for me to say that I know that that's what happened. U.S. finds no evidence flaws in Dominion voting machines were ever exploited.

Well, if they're really good at exploiting it, would you know that you got exploited? And if you were exploited, would you tell everybody they were exploited and Trump should have actually won? When that guy's been screaming like a maniac for four years? Yeah, he sure has. They stole my election. They stole my election. Yeah. It was a rigged election. Rigged.

Even if it wasn't rigged. He's still saying it. But even if it wasn't rigged, let's say it wasn't rigged. Let's say it was a fair and that's who won and that's how it was going to be. Biden won. For sure it was rigged by the media for sure just the hunter biden laptop case and the russia collusion case just those two things yeah just those two narratives that they knew were not true that they pushed out in front of everybody and that we know you know had to do with trying to get rid of Trump. That was a big that's that that is over reporting and one under reporting.

Yeah. Yeah. That is in many ways. That's that's an attempt to manipulation. It's manipulation of a public narrative. It's manipulation of what the people think is real and not real. Everybody thought he was in collusion with Russia. It's what everybody thought. It's what they were. There was all these mainstream, except Fox News. They were the only ones that weren't pushing it. Everybody else was pushing it. Yeah, it was sold hard. Yeah.

And it was not true. And it's proven to be not true. And then there's the Hunter Biden laptop thing, which they knew was true. And they said wasn't true. And they told you that they stopped people from sharing it on social media. They stopped people from sharing on Twitter. Zuckerberg sat in that very chair and said the FBI contacted Facebook and told them that it was Russian disinformation. They were getting a bunch of Russian disinformation.

So they limited the spread of that. I don't know how they did it. I don't know exactly what they did to limit the distribution of that. The FBI is involved in that. It's wild shit, dude. It's pretty wild. It's wild shit, and no one cares. No one's up in arms.

No one's freaking out. Because that is a way that you're going to rig an election without rigging an election. Yeah. Whether you like that guy or not, we have to follow the rules. We have to. And if we don't follow the rules because we don't like somebody and we break the law because we don't like somebody, we don't want them to win. No, I agree.

Now this is banana republic shit. Yeah, that's not cool at all. That's scary. And the fact that they were willing to do that and that there's no oversight, that no one can stop them from doing that. And then there's no punishment for them doing that. It also speaks to how much he's despised by this. Despised. I mean, it's how much he's despised by this. Despised.

I mean, it's really at a level. He fucked up. Well, he was, I mean, you remember there was a time where Chuck Schumer was on one of those shows talking about how stupid it is to attack the intelligence community. I mean, he was openly saying it. Like, they have 18 ways to Sunday to get you.

Yeah. Yeah, and guess what? That's what they did, you know? And, but the fact that they did it, like, it's not good because it's the same thing that I feel about, like the censorship thing with social media. If someone is spreading some sort of fake information on purpose to hurt other people, that's one thing. But if someone is just saying something that you don't like them to say, or something that's disputed, or something that seems to not be agreed upon by certain people, but then there are also experts in the field that do agree,

you've got to let people talk that through. Because if you don't, and you silence debate, and it turns out you were wrong, like the Hunter Biden laptop story or like Russia, if you were wrong and you were ruining people's social media channels, ruining people's YouTube channels, ruining public discourse, changing the way people think about something, well, you have a responsibility to not do that again. Sure. Now you know you did that. And this is why that is dangerous. Censorship is always dangerous. And then when they censor and it's undeniable, you usually just get a lower third. Yeah.

Sorry, whoops. We didn't mean to do that. We fucked up. Yeah, I mean, it's gross. It's gross, and they don't understand that it undermines something that is already a problem, and that's public belief in mainstream media. that is already a problem. And that's public belief in mainstream media.

The general public has lost a tremendous amount of faith in the news and what they're saying and what's true and experts and all sorts of things. And then it was all exaggerated greatly by the pandemic. That blew, people that were just hardcore lefties are now like moving to Texas. Yeah. People that were like, I am getting out of here. This is fucking crazy.

I see where this goes now. A huge shift has happened. And people that are like closet Republicans now that come up to me because they think I'm one. They tell me I'm voting red. And I'm like, well, I don't want, I just, that's not what you have to do. You just got to get good people that really actually do care and aren't bought and paid for and actually have a fucking, a plan to unite people and not strengthen this one side to fight against the other side, but bring everybody together. Make everybody realize our differences are so small in comparison to the things we have in common, the things we want, the things that will help everyone's life.

Yeah. And then we have to think that way. We have to think as a collective group. We have to think of as a community. A lot of people just don't want to think that somebody can have differing points of view about a range of topics. Yep. So they go like, oh, if you are pro-gun, that means you must be pro all these other things, right?

And you're like, not everybody really falls into that. People have all different types of points of views. It can be about any number of things. It can be fiscally, how the government should spend money. It could be about your civil rights. It can be, yeah, it could be guns and abortion. But that's not what defines people. No, it shouldn't.

Yeah, it could be guns and abortion, but that's not what defines people. No, it shouldn't. But it does because there's these predetermined patterns of thinking and ideas that people adopt when they join an ideology, whether they join a progressive ideology or a conservative ideology. In order to be in the group, you have to espouse a certain amount of things. And I see people say it when they might not even believe it. Oh, that's the big one. That's the one that actually is kind of the most disheartening. Yeah. Is when you talk to somebody, you can see it in person and they, and they're just saying the right thing. Yep. Like this is, this is in, this is what my group says to say. And you can just look them in the

eyes and you don't even believe what you're saying right now. Yeah. The real one with me is, uh, Republicans and gay rights. The, that are anti-gay rights that are Republican, they think that all gay people are groomers. Some people are just people who love people of the same sex. Yeah. That has always existed. That's just what makes them come. That's the only thing about them. Well, and they're in love. No, but I'm saying when you go like, what's at the foundation of this?

It's that what arouses somebody is just different than what arouses you. That's it. And they've existed throughout history. Yeah. The idea that there's something wrong with that just because you don't like it. Yeah. That to me is nuts from the people that are supposed to be about personal choice and freedom. Yeah.

That's what drives me nuts. You don't think that somebody else deserves to be in love with who they love? Well, just imagine if- And come super hard inside of them? Yeah. But imagine if it was the gay thing that you had to do and heterosexuality was rare. Yeah. And heterosexuality was like, look at these fucking losers breeding.

What are you going to have a baby, you fucking idiots? Like, oh my God. Like, you know, that would be horrible. That's exactly what it's like Okay, that's the difference. No, it's crazy that we're even having that conversation I feel like they have to have that some some people especially if they want to Attract the the religious people the very like devout Christians. Yeah, there's a lot of people that feel like You have to take yeah is the dumbest dance ever dance ever it really is it just doesn't make any sense

They should be everybody in every community should be judged on an individual basis Shouldn't say oh the the straight people do this the gays do that like that's stupid Yeah, that's stupid and to say you don't want them to have the same rights that you have that's bananas Yeah, that even exists. It's bananas. Yeah, that even exists. It's crazy. And it's still being discussed. Yeah. The people are talking about rescinding gay marriage.

Now that they got rid of Roe v. Wade, they're talking about getting, like, you're out of your fucking mind? What does that get you? I think it's one of those things, like we were talking about before. Like, if you were a conspiracy theorist, you wanted people to be upset about things, it's one more social hot button. It's a giant distraction. And now you're not paying attention to things hot button. It's a giant distraction. And now you're not paying attention to things that matter. It's a giant distraction. And anybody that wants to argue that, they should be forced to argue it with someone who makes this rational sort of argument against it. It's stupid. It's stupid

from a perspective of someone who values freedom. We know gay people. We know a lot of gay people. They love it. They love cock. They love it. They can't wait to get a fat cock in their mouth. Well, how could you not? They're delicious. I heard. Yeah.

I heard they're delicious. I've heard too. But to say that that's a choice, like you're out of your fucking mind. Yeah. It's just, it's not. I mean, it may be with some people and that's fine too. Do whatever the fuck you want. If you want to just try it out, try it out.

Try it out. That guy. RPC. He's really mad at me. He's mad at you? So mad at me. Why? I thought he came on your show. He's your friend. He's flipped. When did he flip? In the last couple of months. What happened? Did you do something different? No, he's just like, he first

calls me in every post, he calls me Tom Ham Sandwich Segura. So that's what he writes. Why Ham Sandwich? I don't know. I don't know. That's funny. But every post he's like, okay, Tom Ham Sandwich.

He goes, you didn't write that book. I wrote a book. He's like, you didn't write that book. It's all fake story. Like, just like. Oh, so he's schizophrenic? Yeah. And he's just like, I don't, you know.

Well, the kind of guy who invites guys to come over his house and beat him up and fuck him. Piss him and beat, yeah. What does he invite him to do? Piss on him, beat him, fuck him. Try it out. Try it out. Just give it a try. And he tells them like they could stay in his house.

Yeah. You get a free lease and a key. There's food. You can bring friends. Did anybody take him up on that? I don't think so. Really? Yeah.

That's how you know you're crazy. And he gives out his full address and phone number in post. Like, full. Like, here's my full address. Wow. Here's my phone number. Just come over. He's trying to get raped.

Yeah. Oh, he literally asks for it. Oh, that's him. Did you ever hear about the drug called Reequip? Mm-mm. Reequip is a drug that was a parkinson's medication and this guy was this guy won a court case against i believe it was galaxo smith klein because he took this stuff he was a normal heterosexual guy he took this stuff and became a gay sex and gambling addict he was having all

these crazy it's a i think it's called a dopamine agonist. I think that's what the- To change his brain chemistry. It did something to him where he could not stop gambling and sucking cock. And he was picking up guys off of Craigslist, and he was having impromptu meetings, and he got raped by two different guys. Sounds like a great excuse to try something else out. That's what I'm saying. But apparently, this is not unheard of, so much so that he actually won in court. Really? Yeah, see if you can find the court case.

I have the court case. I was trying to find the wording of what he... Yeah, so this guy just couldn't stop gambling. He was off the fucking rails with gambling and just wanted to fuck guys and meet guys and chance crazy, dangerous encounters. He was into danger. And it was all because his brain chemistry changed from his drug. Yeah. Something happened

when he got on his Parkinson's drug. So he was a Parkinson's patient? Yes, he was a Parkinson's patient. Holy shit. Yeah. So he's got a little shaky hand. Next thing you know, he's sucking cock and playing bingo. He just fucking fell all in. Jesus Christ. All in, man.

Loving husband who claimed Parkinson's drug turned him into a gay sex addict wins $160,000 compensation in French court. But he's French. Yeah, of course. You never know. He said it turned him into a gambler and sex addict who sold his children's toys for cash.

His wife, who stood by him throughout, was with him as he wept with relief in court after the ruling. Imagine if a fucking drug does that to you. A Parkinson's sufferer has won a six-figure payout against a drug giant after his medication turned him into a gay sex and gambling addict. Jesus.

By the way, not a lot of money. $160,000 to get fucked by a bunch of dudes? To take 100 loads, yeah. Yeah, how many did he get? Within two years of taking the drug ReEquip, he was so addicted to both his vices, he sold his children's toys to raise money and advertised himself on the internet for sex

He's now been given 160 thousand dollars in damages after a court in how do you say that? Wren Wren Wren Wren Wren France upheld his claims Wild that was it. Is that him? I think that's him right there. Yeah, that's the guy look at oh my god The deal what a look of regret. Yeah, look at that guy's face. He's him right there. That's the guy? Oh, my God. What a look of regret. Yeah. Look at that guy's face. He's like, Jesus Christ.

Come taste bad. What the fuck did you make me do? Poor guy. Jesus. Oh, man. Woo. Okay, what does it say about the drug itself? Oh, they increased the damages.

Yeah. Okay, hold on a second. The court increased the level of damage to $197,468.83 euros after finding out there was serious, precise, and corroborated evidence to blame his transformation

on ReEquip. Wow. Yeah. It's been a seven-year battle with our limited means to recognition of the fact that GSK lied to us and shattered our lives.

What does it say about the drug? Scroll down. Does it say anything about the drug or how the drug does that? I would want to know how it does that. What is that stuff? Well, it looks like he said it. Oh, my God. It says, in total, he gambled away a total of 82,000 euros.

So he still only made 80 grand. Mostly placing internet bets on horse races and engaged in frantic search for gay sex. Frantic. He began exhibiting himself on the internet websites and arranging encounters, one of which results in him being raped. I thought he was raped twice. Jesus. Once. He said his family had not understood what was going on at first, but his behavior turned to normal when he stumbled upon a website that made the link between re-equip and addictions in 2005,

and he stopped taking the drug. He said, my life was hell. It still is because you cannot forget a catastrophe like that. Look at his face. You can't fake that. No. It also feels like if you're gay curious, you can blame it on re-equip. You can get your hands on some.

He said the court had heard warnings that re reequip side effects had been made public in 2006 mr. Jambert said the GSK should have informed patients earlier He can conceded that reequip was a good medicine and offered undeniable solutions to people with Parkinson's disease hmm Okay, during the trial GlaxoSmithKline said it had serious doubts that Mr. Jambor had developed his addictions after taking the drug. Hmm. I would have serious doubts, too, if I fought something in court for seven years. But, I mean, for the court to agree?

Is this another one? Well, so that article was from 2012, I guess, when it happened. This is like a more update from 2015. But this is Pfizer. This is them. Pfizer settles lawsuits. Do they own GlaxoSmithKline now? I don't know.

This could be a similar drug or something different. That's why I was kind of, I didn't click this one first. Okay. It says Pfizer settles lawsuits tying sex and gambling addictions to dopamine meds. Class action litigation brought by patients who claim drug maker did not adequately warn them of the side effects of drugs they were taking to treat their Parkinson's disease or restless leg syndrome while this kind of litigation is routine The side effects were not instead patients are told were said the drugs created addictions They didn't previously have patients said rather the drugs created addictions

They didn't previously have causing them to gamble with their life savings or become obsessed with shopping or sex. Holy shit So it's definitely triggering. Yeah. The confidential settlement with 172 patients said to be for millions of dollars was approved by a judge in federal court in Australia. The financial review reports, although payments were delayed until they were assessed by an independent review. Pfizer had agreed to the settlement late last year ahead of the trial of cases brought by

people who took Pfizer's Cabasur and Dostinex between 1996 and 2010 to treat tremors associated with Parkinson's disease or RLS. That makes sense if you've got a neuro... Yeah, dopamine agonist. Drugs work by providing dopamine agonists that imitate the effects of dopamine in the brain, something Parkinson's patients lack. Wow. A study published last year in JAMA Internal Medicine found that the psychiatric side effects of uncontrollable urges were not as rare as first believed. It found they occurred in at least 10% of patients, but said they probably were underreported because patients were ashamed to talk about what they had done. That makes sense. Yeah.

That makes sense. That's so terrifying. Okay, yeah. Will Smith-Klein, UCB's Nupro, and Meropex from Boeinger Ingelheim? Boeinger Ingelheim. Boeinger Ingelheim. The German company was sued by a New York man some years back who said that taking the drug had turned him into a pathological gambler who ruined him as he gambled away $3 million. Fuck. Wow. Fuck.

Wow. Wow. I'd never heard about that. Gambling addicts are wild to be around, man. You saw Uncut Gems, right? Yeah. Adam Sandler movie? Yeah, he was great in that.

Great. Great movie, though. But what a great movie to show what those people are like. If you've ever been around one of those people. I've talked to a couple, and they just talk about the impossible to quit draw. I know one that's like, it is substantial. Sports? I know a sports guy, and I know a blackjack guy.

Oh, yeah? How bad? Unbelievable. Does he have money? Not anymore. Oh, boy. Millions. Millions.

Dana White's a degenerate gambler. Yeah. He gets kicked out of casinos for winning too much. I remember I saw a video about it. Yeah. Like how some of the casinos were like, uh-uh. The one thing I've learned is I liked- Isn't that funny that they could do that?

Yeah. You're too good at this. You know the other thing that's fucking hilarious about like, we did some blackjack on tour and in different casinos all over the place.

It's like, you put your money down and it's like, whoop, give you your chips, right? And a couple times I came out ahead, like had good,

blackjack really, I mean there are, there's by the book. But you realize you get good shoes, you know? Like a shoe is like what they pull the cards from. You just get – like you really do get good shoes and bad shoes. Like you're just – every time you're just – you're winning. And then there's shoes where you're like every hand you lose, right? And you're playing by the book or maybe you're taking risks.

It's like that dealer keeps hitting 20 or 21 based on pulling out the cards and then there's times where it happens to you but these days where you come out ahead you know you win five grand seven you're like oh that's great then you go to cash out and they're like i had the casinos go where did you win this i'm like what are you fucking talking about where did i win this here and they're like which where what game were you playing i'm like blackjack? I'm like, what are you fucking talking about? Where did I win this? Here. And they're like, which, what game were you playing? And I'm like, blackjack. Where?

I'm like, fucking right over there. Hold on. Calling people, you know, verifying. Why did you win? Yeah.

And then they go, all right, hold on. All right, you need to fill out, now you need to fill out this information. You gotta give them

all your information. Give us your ID. I mean, you're sitting there 20 minutes later like, am I gonna get this money? And they're like, yeah, hold on. And then another guy comes in the back and talks to them.

They talk in private. Okay. It's like a 20, 30-minute thing to get paid. Then they give you your cash. And then the funny thing is we noticed this a couple times when I would win. We're all walking as a group back to the hotel. And like a pit boss cuts us off and they're like how you doing and you're like good they're like

do you want to come over here and they're yeah they're trying to get you to come right back right away it's like you won and they don't want you to you know like well we have this we private table over here if you guys want to keep playing how much are we talking about I mean less than 10,000 winning. Wow. But like thousands, right? Yeah. So it's not, no, it's not affecting their bottom line. But it's just like this whole thing of you go,

well, first of all, this is really hard to get paid. I think this would be like a simple, here's the chips, your chips. This is not Vegas. No, this wasn't Vegas. Yeah, I think that's the thing. I think there's some Fagazi casinos out there. And then they go like, why don't you just keep playing? Wow. And you're like, okay. I think I'm that's the thing and then they go to gaze you can see knows out there and then they go like why don't you just keep playing Wow okay I

think I'm good for the day and like okay well you know just come back whenever you're ready if you want to come back really soon that'd be great Wow yeah they're trying to get you to stay they want they don't want that they don't want that loss yeah yeah no Vegas definitely also if you're a gambling junkie and someone comes up to you and you're like, I'm going to do this. I'm going to get out of here with this money. Like one, the pull's strong, but I can go.

And then someone comes along and goes, why don't you play right here? And you're like, why don't I play right here? Why don't I bet it all on one fucking hand? That fucking feeling, too. It is funny how a couple times I went to the high limit room. And I'm still, you know, this is not crazy numbers. But I would put like a few hundred down, and you win, you're like, whoa.

You get that hit, and then you double it, you know? So then you kind of go, holding onto the guy next to you, like, ah, and you win again. Oh, my pocket cup. And you start, you see how, if you're wired for that, yeah, that could be. Especially the craps table. I don't understand craps, but you're the life of the party if you're winning people money.

They're having the best time. It's fucking Ibiza over there. Oh, rolling dice. Let's go. Screaming, cheering. Yeah. You got to know how to play that game, too. You know we're, oh, yeah.

That game is fucking complicated. The low ball and the high yo. What are you saying? How did you learn this? Like, this is a complicated game to get in on. All these little side bets within the bet. Yeah. You know, there's the come line.

Which is hilarious. Yeah, I know. It's literally called the come line. The come line. And then they go, that's all you need to know. But then you play with someone who knows, and they're doing 10 other side bets. How is it still called the come line? I don't know.

First guy ever. What does it mean? What does it mean? Blue is load there. What is it still called the come line? I don't know. First guy ever. What does it mean? What does it mean? Blue is load there. What does it mean? Find out. Why is it the come line? I think I've read this before and it didn't make any sense. I don't know. I don't know what that means. It's probably like the Flintstones. Like gay old time. Old timey.

I know a guy. Different way of talking. The come is a bet made by a player after the point is established. By placing a wager and the come, the wager will travel to the box number which is rolled next. To win a come bet, the number that the wager traveled to must roll a second time before a seven. I think you're betting on point hitting again, essentially, but I might have overcomplicated. Do you want a come or not? I'm too dumb for

that game i'm too dumb and disinterested i know a guy who won 60 grand doing that just a fucking saturday night do you know what he's doing yeah how do you learn i guess how much add would kick in if you were at a craps lesson i would not remember any of it i'd be like i think it's probably just over and over seeing it you start to go okay and then you get like the confidence to do that come bet but then those side bets is like really where it's

I think the problem with it too is like you're betting against the table a lot too because I think it hits if it's 7 or 11 and that's craps so people don't even want to think about that a lot of times but sometimes you'll find a rebel who comes up to the table and just throws a bunch of money on that come bet, and you're like, hey, what is this fucking guy doing?

And then it hits, and you're like, well, he's not wrong, but fuck, he's going against everybody else on the table. It is a silly amount of money, though. You can play a come bet only after a point is made on a come out roll. It's more complicated. But you don't have to place a pass line bet. Okay. You win if the next roll is a seven or 11,

or if the come point is repeated before a seven, you lose if the next roll is a two, three, 12, or if a seven is rolled before the come point is repeated. Right. Wow. I watched it explained on a YouTube video.

Like it was a YouTube YouTube for a moron. Here's how to play this game. Did they explain it the way that I would understand it? Well, at the end, I was like, I'm definitely not playing Grylls. I was like, this is way too fucking... I won money and played for four and a half hours one night. Yeah? I have no idea how I was winning money.

Did you win a good amount? At the time, for me, it was a ton. I was like, I can go buy an Xbox now. I was so happy. I just copied some guy that had way more money than everybody else in the table i was i'm doing whatever he does and hopefully i'll figure it out wow i never figured it out and i've lost a ton of money back thinking it's really fun time is that the best game to play if you know what you're doing or is blackjack oh definitely craps really craps is higher end well craps can the multiples i think are are much crazier much crazier you see the payouts and craps and they're

they're fucking bananas blackjack is just the best odds you have yeah blackjack is really you know there's strategy like i said there's playing by the book but you know there is just a real luck situation. Like, it's not that much strategy involved to, like, flipping over and you have 20. And the dealer's like, I got eight. I mean, it's just. It's not knowing what's next, which is so exciting. Yeah, yeah, yeah. This thing, this card, this might be it.

This might be it. Hit me. And I found that, like, if I do if i do 20 bet there's just no rush right you know i just go like cool right and you get to 100 and you're like yeah cool get to 500 then you start to go this is real money i lose 10 of these yeah yeah that's that's that starts to get you but then when you win that you're like yeah it's so stupid so it's stupid it's so stupid i remember when I used to do gigs in Connecticut. I went to this casino in Connecticut.

It's like one of them fucking, you know, one of those weird casinos. It's very nice for where it is. Yeah. And you're wandering around there. I'm like, what paid for this? What paid for this? Yeah. People like me don't know what the fuck they're doing.

Banging on slot machines. I don't even know if they have slot machines in Connecticut There's some casinos like in California where you can only play certain games. Yeah, there's rules about that Yeah, a lot of rules, but poker casinos some of those things you go like Are you still make a lot of money playing poker are you? Himself playing pills. Yes, that's a skill. That's a skill game. That's a skill game I know there's a lot of poker places in L.A. Yeah.

You know, there's like the Bicycle Club. There's underground games. Oh, yeah. I know about a couple games where people play real money. Yeah, Callen knows some people who do that. L.A. has a number of those. Yeah. Underground games with ballers.

The crazy thing is, like, these guys will just gamble you into a corner where you're talking about so much money you have to fold. Yeah. Like so much money. Yeah. They'll just keep upping it. He said there's games where people are gambling millions of dollars. That's fucking –

Wow, and they're real players. Yeah. Scary. Yeah. I'm staying away from that shit. I saw Philip was playing poker online the other night. Yeah. He did pretty good. Is he good? Yeah. He's playing here. Yeah. Scary. Yeah. I'm staying away from that shit. I saw Philip was playing poker online the other night. Yeah. He did pretty good.

Is he good? Yeah. He's playing here. And his wife. They're both legit poker players. There's a tournament here. I think there was like 100 grand in the pot or something like that. When I was a pool player, there was always like pool players who liked playing cards

and pool players who hated card players because card games took away from action. Yeah. Because when gambling addicts didn't want to play pool because they wanted to play cards. They wanted to play gin rummy. Oh.

That takes away. They'd gamble on that. Yeah. God damn it. Yeah. You'd be mad watching a game break out. If you told me right now

there's a blackjack game we could go play, I'd go play right now. Really? Yeah. It'd be fun. It'd get a little itchy. Yeah, it'd be fun.

Yeah. Dana White won $7 million one night. What White won $7 million one night. What? He lost a million one night. Lost a million. But he won seven? Won seven.

I think that was the night they kicked him out of the Palms. I mean- That's when they pulled the UFC from the Palms. What kind of hands is he playing for that? Who fucking knows? He's very rich, right? So for a guy like that, it's got to be juicy to get him excited. Yeah, so for a guy like that, but it's got to be juicy to get him excited. I stood around one time at the

at the win And I just watched the guy who was alone at the table His lady was right next to him and he was just doing $10,000 a hand and I was like God Just watching them go like boop. No 10. Oh my god 10 I mean, I was like that just gives. That just gives me anxiety just sitting there. Yeah. Watching that, I was like, oh, my God. Because it's so addictive. It's so addictive.

And he wasn't reacting to wins or losses. Oh, boy. He was just like, that can't be good. No. That can't be good. No. He's broken. I got to pee real bad.

Yeah. You want to wrap it up? Sure. I have a special out. I should say that. I haven't even mentioned it. We haven't even talked about it. No.

It's out to the, well, this day that it comes out. It'll be the 4th of July. It's my fifth special. It's called S mentioned it. We haven't even talked about it. No. It's out to tomorrow. Well, this day it comes out. It'll be the 4th of July. It's my fifth special. It's called Sledgehammer. Look at you, you handsome devil. Do you notice the difference when you look back at your old ones? Do you ever see Netflix recommends? Look at that old one and go, holy shit, look at me now.

That's dramatic, yeah. Look at you, you fucking handsome prick. That's in November. I'm 10 or 12 pounds more there. Wow. You look great. Thanks, man. And the special's awesome. I mean mean your fucking set is so tight you know what it was too Joe is that extra year I did an extra year

yeah pandemic obviously influenced that but it made me realize how much better this hour is yeah than any hour I've done yeah I toured another year with it. Yeah. I mean, that's a long time. Tight. My last show of this whole tour, I did 303 shows on this tour. That is so bananas. It's fucking bananas. What a great name, though. I'm coming everywhere.

Yeah, it's a good tour name. Was in Iceland. My last show was in Reykjavik. Sledgehammer. Yeah. Why Sledgehammer? My dick compared to my son's just looks like a sledgehammer.

Netflix. my dick compared to my son's his looks like a sledge but Netflix yeah it's on Netflix now it was I realized something I was like it was the very final show and I had

I mean it's a wildly different hour on the 303rd show than the first one right like probably 40 minutes different but I I was in such control i realized that on that last show that like i was doing like i did you know i opened

with like some local stuff and i did some stuff i wrote in europe because i was touring europe and then i got into like the meat of the hour set and i was like yeah this is when you tour for that long and do this many shows that you're like i've've like, I just owned it in a way that I was aware of it. I was like, I just own this. I think it's a numbers thing. I really do. I think it's like what, you know, in the Malcolm Gladwell book about the Beatles when they played in Hamburg. The thousands of hours.

Thousands of hours. Thousands of shows. Listen, it's awesome. I'm super happy for you. Thank you. Thanks. I hope you guys enjoy it. It was a really fun special. I hope you enjoy it. Bye, everybody. Yeah, thousands of shows. Listen, it's awesome. I'm super happy for you. Thank you. Thanks, I hope you guys enjoy it. It was a really fun special.

I hope you enjoy it. Bye, everybody. Thanks, guys. Happy Fourth of July.