The Joe Rogan Experience - #2179 - Bridget Phetasy

Episode Date: July 24, 2024

Bridget Phetasy is a writer and stand-up comedian. She hosts the podcast “Walk-Ins Welcome” and co-hosts the podcast “Factory Settings” with her husband Jeren Montgomery. She also leads the YouTube program “Dumpster Fire.” www.phetasy.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

The Joe Rogan Experience. Trained by day, Joe Rogan podcast by night, all day. Do you have a new phone? What year is that one? This one is like one of the rehabbed ones. Those are still good though. Like which number? Which number is it? 13 I think. Oh, those are still good. I have an 11 that's still good though. Like which number is it? 13 I think. Oh those are still good. I have an 11 that's still good. I keep an 11 for one of my numbers.

Okay. One of my bullshit numbers. For what? There's certain people you can't give the real number to. Oh yeah. Why would you even give them a number though? You're like a straightforward guy. I guess you have to sometimes.

Sometimes you have to communicate with people. But you want a phone that you just stick in a fucking drawer somewhere. Yeah and check like once a month if that Yeah It just gets crazy where so many relationships become like completely transactional and You know like every time someone texts you they want something and it's just so frustrating I can see it even being your friend. I can see it from a fucking mile away now. People will be like, hey, Bridge.

I'm like, I'm not introducing you to Joe. Leave me alone. All my friends have a story. If somebody has a business idea, they think I'm gonna help them sell skateboards. If someone's like, hey, let's get coffee. It's been too long. I'm like, nope sell skateboards if someone's like hey, let's get coffee. It's been too long. I'm like nope

Not doing it I had a friend from high school reach out randomly hey bridge nope I See it. I see it from a mile away now. I'm like what is it like to be you? It's odd cuz I'm just like you know like an outer asteroid in the universe, but imagine being like the planet itself. I've managed to stay myself, which is shocking. Yeah, you have. But I have really good friends.

My friends are really good friends. And I think you have friends who take the piss out of you. And they've been my friends for 20, 30 years. Yeah. Like Joey and I have been friends for almost 30 years. Yeah. 27 years or 28 years. It might be 30 now, fuck.

I might have met him in 94. It helps to have like, I was asking my husband right before I left about a tweet I was gonna send out and he's like, meh. And I was like, is this too much? a tweet I was gonna send out and he's like meh and I was like is this too much and then I was like fine he's like oh what do you just want me to like clap for you yeah you definitely need someone who's not impressed no not impressed at all at the very least maybe not impressed but also not bullshitting you no right well not bullshit yeah anyone he like suffers no

fools that's great that ensures that you won't live in a world of compromise no Bullshitting you know right on that bullshit. Yeah, I'll bullshit anyone he likes suffers. No fools That's great that ensures that you won't live in a world of compromise now You know some people are okay. They just fuck up every now, and then you have to tell him hey man Don't lie to me. Yeah, you don't have to lie. Yeah, don't do that Yeah, you know, but it's just this weird thing that people fall back on Bullshitting and lying they just fall back on it, and they don't even know they're doing it to themselves You you will have less respect for yourself. You'll yeah, it's not worth it. No, it's not worth it Cuz he you you just create these things that aren't real in your life these relationships these friendships that are based on reality

You know if a person can't handle the truth, you can't tell them, hey, that sucks. You got to work on this. You got to change this. You got to do that. If you don't do that, it's not going to get any better. Like, what? I thought it was the best book ever written. No, no. I mean, I've had all my favorite editors have been so hard on me. I want honest criticism. Yeah. You know, like write jokes for your haters You know write jokes to turn them over like that was pretty good one fucker You know you Stand hope told me once that he writes jokes like a defense attorney. Oh interesting Yeah, he examines his jokes as if he was like prosecuting them

It's great. That's very funny. It's very similar to mine. When I said I write jokes for haters. Yeah. You got to look at it like a hater sometimes. Yeah. Because you can get too in love with your stuff. Yeah. It's too easy. It's too easy to get in love with your stuff. The audience will tell you to. Well, that's the difference between comedy and other things. Yeah. It's hard if you're just a journalist. You know, you're just writing, you kind of believe your opinion makes sense. And all of them are doing the same thing. Like almost all of them, except for the independent ones, they're almost all doing the same things. They're saying, they're expressing their thoughts to a very particular group of people, and

they're also lying about another group of people almost always. Yeah. Like the right does it and the left does it. Yeah, it's all fan fiction. Yeah, it is fan fiction. Like the right does it with liberals because liberals aren't Antifa. Liberals aren't the people that are lighting Starbucks on fire and shooting cops. That's not liberals.

That is just a thing that has existed in a team where you allow anyone to join a team. So if you have something where anybody can join the team, right, which is basically what being a liberal or a conservative is, anyone can join the team. They don't like the sluts, Joe. Everybody loves sluts. Not the conservatives. They just don't, not publicly. Yeah, exactly. They don't like the sluts Joe

Party hard, but they do it for Jesus. I know they do it for Jesus. I'm just saying publicly. Yeah Yeah, yeah, those sluts out of our party. It's the same thing though, man I'm telling you it's the same thing if you were in Antifa or if you are Patriot front You're you I could have got either one of you fucks. You just got to get them early, get them when they're vulnerable, talk them into a very specific ideology. You know who's your problem? The Jews. And next thing you know, they think the Jews really are all their problems. And they kind of meet on that. They're kind of shaking hands. Yeah, yeah, yeah. They get together with the Jews, with now, which is odd, right? Because of Palestine and Gaza, that's where it's kind of come around. Like that moment in time, it's like everybody's mad at the Jews now. It's like, fuck.

I mean, that's the ancient conspiracy theory of all conspiracy theories, that it's the Jews' fault. This is like one of the oldest conspiracy theories of mankind. Well, the Jews make it real tough to join. They're one of the more interesting religions. Like, if you want to join, my uncle joined. My uncle converted to Judaism. He married a nice Jewish lady. I kind of want to convert. Go for it. I kind of do. It's a lot of work.

Let's see what's up. Let's see what new information you get. You'll tell me, right? You'll get the new memos. You'll get part of that Proton mail list. But he had to work really hard at it. And I met a lady he was converting to. I was doing a show once for Syfy, where I was trying to get people to, maybe it was for the Man Show.

I don't remember what it was for. Wait, were you show. Yeah. Yeah, I was an extra on the man show I was in the second generation Right, okay I was in the first I was an extra in the first but what we were trying to do is I was trying to get People to convert me. So I'd go to all these different religious groups and say like Well, what I want to know who's got the best deal. Like, what sounds the best? Like everyone got me.

It opened my eyes. It did. Because I got to see what I believe are genuinely kind people who want a good result for human beings. They really do. And a lot of them really genuinely believe that their structure, their ideology and way of thinking is really the path to happiness, which is ultimately like the path to God. You know, without breaking it down to cult-like thinking and how people get absorbed in ideas that are untenable, that just don't make any sense, they're completely ridiculous, but they're scientifically minded people who attach themselves to that if it's a part of their religion. Without that, what everybody wants is something good and they think that the way to have something good for the people that join is to sort of

demonize the people that aren't joining or demonize the other ones. It's a tribal thing. But it's just like all these little patterns of human thinking that we have. People have it with everything. You see with cell phones, you know, you see with Android people versus iPhone people, it's just a normal human tribal characteristic that's embedded in our DNA, that if we don't address and recognize we're not going to overcome the hurdle because we're going to pretending as if it doesn't exist and as if your side is right and the other side is wrong and not just looking at it like, oh we're stuck in a blue versus red, white versus black, one versus zero. It's just a tribal thing that exists in the way we operate.

And we have to be aware of it and not get mad at people for falling into it because it's normal to fall into it. It's literally a pattern that's embedded in the code that makes you a human being. It's how we created cities. It's why we're here today. It's interesting because I've been reading that,

rereading my favorite book, Trickster Makes This World, and how the trickster- Who wrote that? Lewis Hyde. It's all about trick- What a great title. Oh, it's so good. But it's saved me at a point because I didn't really, I had a hard time, and I think this is,

this is where like Jordan Peterson is so good talking about archetypes, knowing kind of the archetypes. And I didn't really know my role, and I read this book and I was like, oh. Can you tell me the name of it again? I'm gonna get it. Trickster Makes This World. Trickster Makes This World.

It's so brilliant, but they're. Sounds cool. Actually, one of the quotes that I put in your card is from that book. And it's one of my favorite quotes ever. It's all about he who dupes others and who is also duped himself. He's creator nor destroyer.

It's like, this is, the people I've noticed who have stayed the most, I mean, sane is a term I'm using loosely. The people I've noticed, it's like comedians, people who are kinda like tricksters. They've managed to kind of ride the waves of the past eight years because I think they're not too attached.

And in this book he talks about how it was, there was all this trickster mythology like coyote and hermies and then it got kind of turned into the devil and it became evil versus good. And when that happened, when the loss of that mythology in the culture happened, it became much more black and white and like this kind of dualistic, like you said, tribal thinking without all of this gray area that,

I do feel like I look around like Malice and all the people, most of the people who I've been hanging out with and know Have been kind of having a blast for like eight years Everyone first I watched everyone on the left loser mind then people on the right lots It was like I was having the same conversations for four years with the left Then I was like all the people on the right I was gonna be fine. It's not the end of the world and then here we are again here

We are here we are again and the only people that make any sense to the ones who aren't on either team The the people that say things like you know as a conservative I I love you're a fucking human being don't say it that way don't think it that way there's a there's a bunch of things that you believed but don't put yourself in a fucking group because there's probably a bunch of stuff that the left agrees with that you would probably agree with too yeah and you can't be you can't be resistant to those ideas simply because they're attached to people you've decided are the enemy. They might be right.

They might be right about welfare. They might be right about, hey, maybe kids shouldn't ever be fucking starving. As a group of humans that live together on this one little patch of dirt called North America, maybe we should agree that since we have this gigantic amount of money, that no kids should be hungry. How about that? And then, since we got that done, hey, how about regular people? How about no people should fucking starve?

Regardless of whether or not you think people are lazy or this and that, how much would we solve if no one could possibly starve? We set up free restaurants or free kitchens in every city. But we have, we should have really good ones and massive ones. Like for real, food should be free for a lot of people.

If we're this rich as a country. We're pretty rich. So let's have no babies starve, no babies be malnourished, nobody starves to death. I mean health too, healthcare would be 100%. You shouldn't be going bankrupt. But you have to revamp the whole thing. You would have to get to the real nitty gritty like, why are you prescribing this?

Who's making money off of this? How did this happen? How many ads did you guys run? What did the ad say? What are the studies? What are all the studies? Not just the ones you submitted. What's the actual data instead of the data

that's reviewed by the pharmaceutical company and then given to the scientists in the report when they do their peer review? When that was explained to me, I was like, hey, you guys are making too much money. You're getting crazy. This is what it is. You went above and beyond the rules

because you have too much power and influence But also you do great stuff. Yeah, they also they make life-saving saving drugs Also, they stop a lot of diseases also see like there's a lot of good there Yeah, you can't say the pharmaceutical drug companies are all evil bitch. They keep us alive in a lot of respects Yeah, they do. They do people healthy. They've saved people from depression There's like a lot of good that pharmaceutical drugs and the drunk companies have done. They've saved people have diabetes There's a lot of good a lot of good. So let's say that they're all evil. No, it's fucking money people It's easier to do that though, too

Because you don't have to really come up with a solution if everyone's just at each other's throats. Well, there's not enough oversight. If there was real oversight, objective oversight by people who actually knew what they were doing, they would never let them get away with just prescribing a bunch of stuff that they knew was going to have a negative effect. Like the Vioxx scandal. That's part of the whole scandal was that they knew that people were going to have these effects, these side effects that were very bad they knew

it they talked about it in emails these knuckleheads fucking so stupid they said they were gonna have some problems but we also think we're gonna do well they're explaining all the like this you know cardiopulmonary cardiovascular all those different blood clotting problems I have a friend who had a fucking stroke and he took that stuff. No. He was in his 30s. Oh, wow. Yeah, he was in his 30s. A martial arts champion.

Yeah, I'm glad I'm kind of stupid and I just am like a clown. Yeah. I'm not like smart enough to fix these problems. I can I can observe them and experience them on my own and see that it does behoove these people to just have everybody fighting so that they don't actually have to come up with, like politicians in particular, they don't have to come up with real solutions, they can just be like, it's the other guy forever. If you ever lived in a house that has black mold.

No, thank God, because that shit will destroy you. It'll destroy you. Yeah. I've had a couple friends who have had problems with black mold, and it's really interesting. And usually what happens is they get sick, and they're sick all the time, and they can't figure out why they're sick. And they're tired. They're really tired. They're just worn out all the time. And then finally, they get their house examined and somebody probably suggested to them and then oh Jesus Christ your walls are filled with black mold and a lot of times it's like a leaky pipe or something a leaky pipe and there's water in the walls and all the moisture and in Texas it gets crazy they get it they get it bad out here

but when you have that you have to burn the fucking house down, essentially. You have to cut out all the walls. It's a very invasive process. Remember that guy, Tom Lycus? Remember Tom Lycus, who's a radio DJ in LA? It sounds familiar. Oh, yeah. Yep, yep, yep.

Yeah, he had Flash Fridays where girls would pull their tits out or he would tell people they're useless on the phone. Remember that guy? He had that. That happened to him and he was explaining it to me. He said it was horrific that like he's just sick all the time, couldn't figure out what was up. And it's hard to get out of your system. Yep, hard to get out of your system. It wrecks your health and it takes a long time to recover just from the effects of it. It's essentially a breathing poison every day and who knows what it actually does overall that you're not going to recover from.

Like it might actually take like years off your life, like who knows? But the point was it's really hard to get rid of it. It's so invasive and I think that's where money is today. Money is with pharmaceutical drugs, money is with politics. It's like we could all agree, I think we could all agree that the way the pharmaceutical drug company should work is they should be very careful about what they prescribe and they should be very careful about side effects and they should be very careful about what is addictive and not addictive and what should be prescribed openly and regularly and what

should not be for the greater good of humanity. And even if they did that, even if they did that that they would still make ungodly amounts of money that's what's so crazy about all this but it wouldn't be the maximum amount of money and when you have a publicly shared company it's your responsibility to the shareholders to make the most money yeah and you make more money every quarter you know you want to keep going let's go let's go let's go let's go planes are falling out of the sky It's also where you get a private jet. You got a let's fucking go like and the thing is

That's been attached Unfortunately to our health and then you get people that and you know they fucking advocate for public health and they look super unhealthy They're telling you the only solution is bang bang bang and the only solution is generally tied to something they have invested in. Yeah. It's fucking crazy but it's black mold. It's black mold. It is. That's what it is. And like the resistance to getting stock trading out of politics, you know, like you shouldn't be able to affect the stock and trade on it the policy about a company and then be able to make it's like Millions and millions of money. Have you seen the Nancy Pelosi one with a questioner? No, you know, I feel oh my god. Yeah, I have seen it finds it

This is fucking amazing because she's all stammering She looks like she's a little drunk already and then they hit her with it. She's like, huh? What I think we should be able to participate but I think she I have It's amazing how badly she handles it. They they're they're so rich. It's crazy. Crazy bitch How are you hundred millionaires you get paid like a hundred seventy thousand dollars a year and you're worth hundreds of billions of dollars. That is so wild It is very Rome ask, you know, it's amazing. It's amazing. They do it right in front of you I'm not jerking off. I'm not jerking off. It's raining out They come right in your face and they're like, so crazy

It's so crazy because there's so many of them and then nobody talks about it The other ones don't talk about it because then you look at the list and it's like black bipartisan yeah it's both here you go it's blue it's red yeah some of the Republicans are making the most oh yeah no I don't know to this second one any we have a responsibility to report in the stock on the stock but stock, but I'm not familiar with that five month view, but if people aren't reporting, they should be. Why should they be there?

This is a free market and people, we have a free market economy, they should be able to participate in that. That's such bullshit saying that it's a free market it's not when you're manipulate when you know you're gonna pass laws and those laws are gonna affect a company it's gonna make the stock go up like that's crazy okay yeah that is a free market I guess yeah that's crazy if you could fucking go to jail for insider trading like what is that what come like what is that?

What come on? What is that? You know Martha Stewart's watching this like these motherfuckers? Well, we figured that out the other day Martha Stewart did not go to jail for insider trading She went into jail for lying to an investigator. She's lying under oath. They all lie though Was she lying under oath or was she just lying when questioned? She's lying right now. Was she lying under oath or was she just lying when questioned? Something like that. Yeah, something like that. So that's why she went to jail for, but that's like a little trick they do.

You know, they get you to start talking and then, you know, you don't tell the truth about something. Have you ever talked to Doug? Do you know Doug? Doug? Who's Doug? Right away you're lying. Right away you're lying.

And for her, I don't even think it was a lot of money, which is really crazy. Right away you're lying. Right away you're lying. For her I don't even think it was a lot of money which is really crazy. She would have only lost like a certain amount of money. She's super duper rich. You're not Doug. Yeah, you're like, huh who the fuck is Doug? Fucking what? You're lying.

We see you texting Doug right here. Oh no. Not Doug. And then you think like Signal is really encrypted. I thought his name was Douglas. They're showing you the fucking things from signal Why were you doing on an encrypted app? How did you read it wait a minute? Just ridiculous you believe any of these apps are really no none of them are encrypted. They're I think they are a honey pod

They're all honey. I think they are encrypted, but I don't think that matters to fucking CIA or the NSA or whoever wants to read Your shit shooter. I was like give me whatever phone that we can get into it Yeah, we can get into his phone like what the fuck are you talking about bitch you get into Elon Musk's phone They got into it. No, they couldn't get into it on the field, but they went back to Quantico And they got a software update and then they got into it like oh the software update the old software update. That's what they're calling these days They crashed all the planes the other day or whatever like they were like Oh is this software update like that it took it one software. It's like stop all global flights I read like the ultimate of ultimate conspiracies. Oh, I want to hear it.

Give it to me. Please let America know I've done zero research into this. And I just saw a tweet. And the tweet was essentially saying that this company was owned by a Ukrainian billionaire. Oh, here we go. It's Zelensky. This company that, what's it called crowd strike crowd strike that

crashed the entire internet for all the fucking airlines Was owned by some rich ukrainian guy. This is like this grant grand conspiracy. There's so many good conspiracies go on If you're in a conspiracies, it's like murder mystery podcasts No, it's like that meme with the guy from where it's like There's so many and by the way, so many of them have become so I had how about the phone call? Which phone call the phone call with Kamala Harris and and he's on speakerphone, but they found him now There's video yeah, that's what I'm saying There's video. Yeah, that's what I'm saying.

Listen, I'm not saying that he's not really that's not really Joe Biden. That's a guy in a CIA makeup suit walk up the stairs. I'm not saying that, but they can do that. Wait, so what's the conspiracy about CrowdStrike? That I don't understand. That, oh, I don't know. I didn't read into it. I know. I never do. By some Ukrainian billionaire It's like do you know this is on this tie. I see your button

Hunter Biden and And there's Galeen Maxwell in the plains Christ I can't keep up with this season. I can't I season every night with the episode ends. I sit in my couch I go what are they gonna do next? You're like I'm afraid to turn it off I was talking to my sister on the way and I was like and she was going off about something and She's like I was like, oh, did you see that? This kid might have had ties to the FBI. She's like he did I'm like, I don't know

I saw a tweet, but I'm like, I don't know. I saw a tweet, but I'm just going to tell you that he did. Let's send it to Jamie for further investigation. So the allegation is that this kid had been visited multiple times. See they got cell phone data. So they got geo tracking data and some phone call had some phone had been visiting him and going back to Washington DC on multiple times and that this this they got him thing had been happening near the FBI location. I know I have it here somewhere I know I have it

saved but god damn it so many people are sending me this shit today that I can't keep up. Oh, it's Tim. Tim sent it here. I'm gonna send it to you. Me and Tim Dillon are going back and forth all day on conspiracies. That's like Landau and I. Dave Landau, all day long.

We're just like. He's a fun dude. Oh my god, my favorite human. One of my favorite humans. He's just a good, like he, when I got back into comedy he started letting me open for him and his crowds are amazing first of all. The guy's been on the road for like 20 years but watching him it's like he's good at everything. I don't understand he's good at act outs, he's good at

crowd work, he's good at like coming up with shit that day from the news cycle. Like the guy is like, it's actually, he's one of the most underrated comics. Well, I think there's a lot of comics that for whatever reason, they never caught a break. They never caught a thing that got them out there that people got to see them, but they're really good. Yeah.

He's doing mothership though. I'm excited. Oh yeah, he's doing it. The weekend a friend of mine was gone. I'm opening for him. She was telling me that's in October? It's the endhip though. I'm excited. Oh yeah, he's doing it. The weekend a friend of mine was gone. I'm opening for him. She was telling me that's in October? It's the end of August. Oh. Yeah.

Right, right, right. Last weekend in August. That's right. September 1st is when my friend's going. Yeah. It's going to be fun. Yeah. He's just like a joy to watch.

And his humor's so dark. He's a good dude to hang out with too. He's so good. He's a good person. Oh here it is. Oh my god, this needs to be shared everywhere immediately. The Heritage Foundation. First of all, red flags all over the place. First of all, who the fuck is this? What's the Heritage Foundation? They're like the, you know, Project 2025 people. Oh, I love it. They got Jesus on speed dial. The Heritage Foundation just

released cell phone data of a mysterious figure who made frequent trips between Trump shooter Thomas Matthew Crooks home and a building in DC near an FBI office. Well, you know what? My house is fairly close to a Taco Deli, but there's really no connection. What does that mean? You know what I'm saying? I love it. Nine devices were identified in the analysis linking to both his home and work. Oh Well, no, it's not out Jamie

So here's the thing when they I had this guy on my podcast Walk-ins welcome back during the BLM stuff, and he said all of it Jamie get back to open the glink There's no link. No I went to this oversight committee's plate I was looking for their original tweets about it. Do they have the Heritage Foundation has a post about it on their website? I never saw from Heritage Foundation. Can you go there without catching prices? Oh you know the guy I had coach T. Okay. So I had him on my podcast and he said all the guys who were marching in BLM were either homosexuals or actors

He's like there are no black men who are marching in this and he was like not like Like heterosexual black men. He said this I lost a sponsor for it. Whoa, cuz coach T said that you lost a sponsor Yeah, cuz they were like that out Opinions what he's a black man. He can't say what he also he's funny Hilarious and he probably laughed when he said it right and the cell phone data came out because they can track all of us all The time and it turned out it was like he was deadly accurate Misinformation or people confused about their identity, that's what he said People and people in entertainment,

homosexuals are people confused about their identity. That's hilarious. What is this, Jamie? Heritage Foundation tweeted this oversight project thing that says, assassination info drop. So it says, four hours of congressional testimony later, and we still have more information about the assassination attempt on former President Trump from X and oversight PR than the Secret Service DHS or the FBI. We found the assassin's connections to our in-depth analysis of mobile ADD-DAT data tracker

to track the movements of Crooks and his associates. To do this, we tracked devices that regularly visited both Crooks' home and place of work and followed them. So think about what they're saying here, though. Analysis of mobile ad data. So the ads are tracking you every step of the way, wherever you are. And it's just open about it.

When my husband was certain, the ads outed my husband looking for a ring for me I started getting ads for rings. No, no, it's creepy shit. Well, we were talking about the other day Jamie What was oh purses so someone was explaining to me? My wife is explaining to me like what purses and why people like certain purses and purses are like all the brands Exclusive like you have to develop a relationship You have to develop a relationship with a person selling the purse in order to get one of those purses You can't even get the ones that are on the show

I can't go buy that now like it's like Rolex is like yeah, if you want to a Rolex or you can't just buy a Rolex I don't know. No, sir. We don't have anything sale. You have a giant store What the fuck is this so I was talking about it with her and then all of a sudden I started getting these purse ads Yeah, on my mind knows what Google so it's listening But it's just listening. Yeah, yeah, and you know we just accept that also knows who's in the same room together So I knew my husband was looking for rings for me, and then I started getting ads for the ring dirty rats It's a fucking rat, but the thing is like how do they get that? That's I think that's like the the available. Yeah a lot of it. I think are you pay I pay I think you pay so you can pay and then plug in a phone number

I've thought about asking if we can do an investigation like this just for funsies to see like what data can we get yeah? Let's do that. Let's track. Jamie all day long Which massage power Jamie's going to to get that. We can pick someone and find him. Some willing participant. If you see, I mean, for real, but that's creepy because then they just have to find your phone number, Jamie, and they'll know what your route is based on ad tracking data, which is crazy. That seems like a huge security liability.

I brought up to, I was talking to someone out in the lobby, the new journal app on the iPhone, which is like iOS 17 or 18. It keeps giving me prompts. Oh, fuck that thing. To like, you know, write in your journal. I was looking through it yesterday. It's broken down by like where I go, what I was doing there, and then it knows it's like, do you want to write about your golf day at this place for Monday?

Oh, it's a dirty little spot. You were out to lunch here lunch here like how about your day at work with Marshall and the dogs is like Dirty little spy. How does that work? Dirty little spy. I wrote a whole piece about those menstrual tracking apps because I had one back when I was dating my husband and then I was like hey can I sign you up just to see how weird this is and he's like this is fucking creepy I don't want to know that you're like in your luteal phase or whatever. And I have to be nice to you. And it like gives him tips like shoot. Like, oh, no, not tips.

You know, it'd be great though, if you had like a real female heavy government and, you know, they would all have coinciding menstrual cycles if they all work together all the time. And then you could like get all their Data and figure out exactly when this shit is about to hit the fan And you could like run the stock market that way you can like make bets because when the shits gonna hit the fan They're gonna be fucking angry things gonna go sideways. You're gonna have a dip in productivity You have people resigning something's gonna go wrong This is all this stuff the left is very worried about

with like JD Vance, cause allegedly he's like big and I don't know if this is true, America, I don't know if this is true. He's allegedly into like the menstrual tracking and you know, these billionaires are getting behind these apps so that they can like, and there's a lot of fear. What do they want from that?

There's a lot of fear with like the states that don't allow abortion because now they wanna pull up your records and see if you might, I don't fucking know, I read these things and I'm like, I don't know what's true or not or what's just being hyperbolic so that people freak out about this stuff. But there's a whole industry in this now,

like a whole menstrual tracking. Jesus Christ. I was listening to a podcast the other day, and I never knew why women's cycles synced up. But here's my question, what do they want from it? What do they want from that data? What? What are these guys that are tracking menstrual cycles?

Well, it's generally presented as something that's good for the women because then you can eat and work out with their cycle because if you are in perimenopause or premenopause or you're in the prime of your life, you want to do different things at different times in your cycle and different foods are better. Hormones for women are nuts. Dudes just have what, you've got one? Women have like three that are constantly interacting and all it's so depending on what,

they just haven't done as many studies. So now they're trying to say like, oh, it's good to know where you are so that you can support yourself. Allegedly all these guys want this for like, Handmaid's Tale, I don't know. That's what I'm asking, what do the guys want it for? This is a conspiracy.

The article I'm reading says that there was a new regulation, HHS files a new regulation under HIPAA to limit law enforcement access to medical records tied to reproductive health. So they go all the way down to saying, local police agencies might simply take it upon themselves to pull the records to see who had unexplained disruptions in their menstrual cycles. To find out if someone crossed state borders to get an abortion.

Whoa! Okay. It's nuts. Yeah. Oh my God. Imagine your own menstrual cycle isn't private information Nothing's private, but imagine that yeah Imagine like someone can sneak in and say what happened and you have to explain you had a fucking miscarriage to some asshole Who's accusing you of driving to Ohio or wherever the fuck? Yeah, go imagine I mean that just imagine those conversations if you're a person who had a miscarriage. Oh, yeah I mean imagine you're married major you're married and happy you were trying to have a kid and you had a miscarriage and some

Fucking asshole is that your front door? Accusing you of getting an abortion. Yeah to deal with this Christian fucking cult member with a clipboard, you know Aggressively accusing you of killing your baby. Yeah. It stems from what they call the Dobbs decision, which changes the rights of states. So Dobbs decision tore away the constitutional right to privacy and bodily autonomy by giving

states increased rights to limit and even outlaw abortions. Fortunately, the decision did not ban abortions nationwide. So then they were saying that some of these new regulations could allow them to go even further and check, like do whatever they have to do to check, kind of. They're trying to stop that. Isn't it crazy that one of our biggest arguments as a country is whether or not you should be allowed to kill a baby. Isn't that crazy? I love you. That really is what it is. And I'm not a pro-life person.

I don't think it's my decision. I don't think I have the right. It's too weird. Especially if I'm not involved, like I'm a politician. I'm looking at a person and deciding whether or not they should have to have that baby or not it's like it seems crazy because it seems like it's one of those weird human things where are you saying the moment of conception it's a baby like if it's three cells and you know for a fact that's when you can't shut that down like you what but then if

you ever go to the bodies exhibit that's fucking yeah exhibit that I talk about Yeah, and they have a babies they have babies at every stage and they see you see him at six weeks eight weeks ten weeks first of all How'd you get those? Right. Yeah, second of all it Really like puts it in perspective and it changes like this idea and you just putting it in a box a woman's right to choose right yeah definitely not my not my place but look at that look what we're saying look we're saying the choices like what we look what we're like advocating for I think most

American like when you pull Americans it's very much I think where I end up landing they're squishing on it and it's like pro-life in the sheets, like pro-choice in the streets, pro-life in the sheets. Like a lot of women are like, I wouldn't get an abortion, but I don't wanna stop someone else from doing that. But to hear that, and then there's a slippery slope of allowing people to tell you you can't get an abortion, right, especially allowing men to tell women

that they're not even remotely connected to, that they can't have an abortion. It's like a weird body autonomy thing. And it's like... That's what I mean. And a lot of them want to exclude crazy things like a child that is like never gonna live, like unviable, or it could be a threat to the woman. There's some sort of a medical issue. It could be a threat to the woman's life unless they abort the baby. And even then, they're like, no. Let God sort it out. Like, hey... Well, they'll make exceptions for this, allegedly, but the doctors are worried often about losing their license

in states where it's highly regulated, so you end up... It's sketchy. It's scary. Yeah, it's sketchy. And I don't think, like, you know, it's a slippery slope to like get the jab too. You know, you, I don't think you have to have some kind of bodily autonomy, but I understand the argument too from the moral perspective. I had this woman in a stepman on my podcast and she's brilliant and she was like, you know, it's a hard conversation because it is a moral, like if you're not conflicted about it, you're not thinking deeply about it

because it is a life and as someone like Ben Shapiro would say, left untouched, that would be a baby. And I think, was it Burr who had that like brilliant bit? Brilliant bit, brilliant bit, yeah. Lily has a brilliant bit on it too. It's um. It's complicated. It's complicated.

Yeah, I understand the fight for it, you know, if that is where you lie. Yeah, but this thing of having people track your fucking cycle. Yeah, no, the cycle. And seeing a regular, and having like crazy, like bow tie wearing Christian guys do it. You know what I'm saying?

I just love that in your mind they're like these like, hello! Pray the gay away type dudes. Pray the gay away. You know, there's, you know, they can, they mask themselves in a blanket of virtue through religion the same way a lot of woke people do by being mean cunts and thinking they're doing it to be like progressive or.

Well they have their own version of Pray the Gateway. It's the same, yeah, they do. But they're doing what they're doing by wrapping themselves up in these ideas of Christianity. It's just allowing like people's worst instincts to be able to be justified. Instincts to control people and dominate people and destroy people.

People have weird instincts to just destroy people. Yep, and people do have weird things about women. Like there is just a very, it is very strange to think, I don't know, are there, other than like the jab, when people were like, you gotta get the jab, I can't think of, I don't know and maybe I'm wrong, is there like a comparable scenario where men's bodies are kind of like this battlefield?

None, nothing, nothing remotely close. Nothing's remotely close. And again. No one has any control over men's bodies. I mean the only thing they can tell you is don't take steroids, which they do. But who's going to jail for that? Yeah.

And also there's testosterone therapy that people get. Yeah. That's, it's not steroids, but that's, no one's stopping you from doing that. Because it's beneficial and helps people. Awesome. It's great. It's great stuff.

It helps people. It helps your body retain its vitality. And you don't want a broken down old fucking shitty body. It's really that simple. And everybody attaches testosterone to douchebaggishness and I totally get, I totally get where that's coming from. Douchebaggery, shitty behavior, unnecessary aggression. Yes, 100%.

But not always. And it's like all things. It's like, yeah, cars, people drive recklessly and they drive drunk and they cause accidents. Right, but not always. So let like yeah, cars, people drive recklessly and they drive drunk and they cause accidents. Right, but not always. So let's not ban cars. Let's not automatically assume that all things masculine are bad. This is a stupid thing. It's so unhealthy too. Also, ladies, that's what you like. That is what you like. Ladies.

I know you don't want to admit it, but that's what you like. That is what you like. Ladies. I know you don't want to admit it, but that's what you like. You just like it when it's nice. That's all it is. Kinda, yeah. Yeah, you just don't want it mean, and you don't want it ruining civilization, and that's what it does,

because it ruins civilization. Like if wars were all women, there'd be no fights. There'd be very few, there'd be a few brawls in like Wendy's at two o'clock in the morning. There would be no real war. It's not the same thing. You know what I'm saying? But I'm saying if there was wars, if entire populations were all women, I mean no men,

men don't exist. So women exist only in the form that they exist today, right? Let's pretend they don't need men and they just exist like this. There'd be fucking zero war. What do you think about this argument though that the other thing that's destroying civilization right now is not having enough men dying in wars? Boo! Like you have all these men who generally

would be kind of sacrificing these wars historically who are, and now they're all just like keyboard warriors who hate, you know, they're incels basically. There's an argument that people make about we need to put them back in the coal mines. They need to get back to. I've got a much easier solution, jujitsu. Yeah, or that.

It should be mandatory. You know how you learn how to read? You should learn how to strangle people. Both? Both sexes. Yes, definitely. Well, jujitsu is the absolute best self-defense for women. 100%. There are women that are 130 pounds that can put you to fucking sleep if you're a big grown man.

They will fucking strangle you. They will take your back, you won't be able to stop it, and they will get their hooks in and they'll put you to sleep. That's a 100% fact. You just need a fighting chance to get away. Yeah, but you also need to be able to defend yourself. And like one of the best things about jiu-jitsu is the guard and learning how to fight off of your back. Now if you're a woman and some guy takes you down and tackles you, learning how to effectively defend yourself off your back is fucking huge.

It's absolutely huge because technique can overcome physical strength Yeah, it really can especially in that position I want to learn how to shield with their shins They learn how to grab at the biceps and the shoulders and prevent you from using your strength They learn how to get under hooks and to go behind you, they learn how to defend themselves. Do you know if there's a place in Austin that does like women's self defense? 100%. Okay, because I don't want women's self defense. I'm not disparaging women's self defense classes, but what my feeling is is that you should learn how to actually fight. Okay. I think there's, I used to, I

used to teach Taekwondo at Boston University and then they had this women's self-defense class They're gonna do there too, and I got a chance to watch it And I was like none of this is gonna work no this is gonna when I was taking a Gracie and Beverly Hills it was Jiu-jitsu, but it was specifically like you get grabbed from behind. Oh, yeah, the gracies do a different thing though Yeah, so you you were learning how to fight, but it was specifically like generally how you're in a car You're this is my this is the reason why I'm saying this Knowing how to do something is not enough. It's just not enough. You have to train it and you have to train

It has to be automatic. Yes. You have to train it all the time Yeah If you don't train it all the time when the thing happens, you'll have to think you don't want to have to train it all the time. If you don't train it all the time, when the thing happens, you'll have to think. You don't want to have to think. Right? No, it has to be like muscle memory. Yes. One of the best things about jiu-jitsu is when you're rolling in the class, the person who

you are sparring against is generally going close to 100% of their strength. When there's certain positions, like there's certain things that they're doing to you where they are using all their might to try to achieve a dominant position, a passing of a guard, a finishing up of a submission, they're closing up a submission, that is, you're accustomed to that. So it's a normal thing.

So you're not, when you do sparring and karate class, you kinda touch each other. So when somebody really fucking blasts you you're not it's not you're not used to that and you might freak out right jujitsu It becomes automatic Okay, is the absolute best martial art for people because if you're in a physical struggle with someone if some guy grabs you at A bar and the bar table behind you falls over and you're on your back You you know exactly what to do. You don't even think.

You're in the middle of chaos and it's as easy as tying your shoe. You know exactly what to do, but it's because you've done it a thousand times. This is like shooting though too. It's why you've gotta train. You should train everything. Everything that you do that's important to you.

Everything, everything. It's standup comedy. You have to do a lot of sets. If you don't do a lot of sets, you don't feel sharp. You have to feel sharp. Yep. It's been so fun to get back because I was, I kinda convinced myself maybe I just had a 10-year phase.

Of comedy? No. And then my friend, Ariel Isaac-Norman, who runs a Gay Enough show, she's amazing, and she was like, just come, do one set, and see how you feel. And I was like, I don't know, I'm a mom now. Maybe that was just my lesbian summer that I had, or whatever, and she was like, just try it and see.

She's like, you can lie to yourself about this, but once you're a comedian, good luck getting that out. And once I got up, I was like, God damn it, I gotta do this now. And it's not something you can just do. You've gotta do it. Well, also you feel the puzzle again. I love the puzzle!

You feel the puzzle, you go on stage, you're working the puzzle out, and you're like, okay, I'm in. It's so humbling too. I just love eating shit and being like, I't know is it was funny someone is like why are you doing that I'm like well I can either be a successful pundit or a failed comedian and I'd rather be a failed comedian. Well even the successful pundit is not mutually exclusive. No. You call him Jimmy Dorr? He does both. Jimmy's great though. Jimmy's smart though.

Such a funny stand-up too. Yeah. He did stand up at the club when he was in town podcast. I haven't seen him live in forever He was really funny. Yeah, it's really sharp. Yep. Yeah, it's been nice guy, too Yeah, I've always wanted to I don't know him. I've always wanted me a sweetheart. Yeah, he's a really nice guy Every every interaction I've had with him has been pleasant, but I never goes He goes so hard like he knows a lot though. He does he's constant well He's him and he's ruined Kurt Metzger Kurt Metzger is like so far down the conspiracy rabbit hole now I know every fucking conspiracy Kurt Metzger's balls in oh yeah And he just freaked out by everything because he didn't know all this stuff till he started working with Jimmy

He started working with Jimmy's like Jesus Christ And now he's just like he's just in every time I have I find anything that's fucked up I send it to him to get him worked up Kurt yes And he sends me like these walls of text. You wanna see these walls of text? Have you ever seen them? No. Have you ever been texting with Kurt? I wish. Let me show you Kurt Mesker wall of text.

When they were here doing their show. Look at these walls of text. Look at these. Look at these walls of texts. Watch these. I'll get you a good one here. Here we go. Here's a good one. Look at this wall. Oh wow. He's just fucking... Here's another good one. Here's another good wall. He just he'll like just go at you guys like a joke writing machine No genius. Yeah, he's a genius. Yeah, I mean his mind just he has a like, you know when they open dance Yeah, he's such a great joke writer it's such a fun dude to hang out with. But the tweet walls are fucking insane.

Their thing that they did at Mothership that he and Kyle did. I was, that shit is genius too. Donnie Ginn is one of those guys where you want to talk about someone who's like not appreciated for how good he is. And a genius. True genius. His face swaps of Trump. Did you ever see the one with Trump and Caitlyn Jenner? They're having sex? No. I think that was the one that they wouldn't let on Comedy Central.

Because, you know, briefly, he was going to do a thing on Comedy Central with the face swaps, but they're too good on Instagram. They're too good. Like he's too free. Yeah. And the craziness is the freedom. Yeah. Good like he's too free. Yeah, and the the craziness is the freedom Yeah, you know like did you ever see the one where Caitlyn Jenner? Was explaining about her new vagina that she got to the girls and how she masturbates with it with a weed wacker

It's like the whole thing is so it's so horrible It's so crazy and the girls are like what? Like you've seen it. He's got the Kardashians of background fight fight now, please Jamie. He's Baby, he does the best Caitlyn Jenner. It's fucking insane. He does the best Trump They were when they did the land acknowledgement. It was like a picture of you kicking like The audience had no idea what to make of this We need to do a land acknowledgement. I was like watching NPR at Mothership.

It was so good. Do you remember when they used to announce what color the clothes they were wearing? Oh, yeah. My pronouns are she, her, and I'm in a blue dress. Didn't Kamala do that? Yes, yes, yes. Yeah.

They only did it for like a few weeks and they're like too much too much So stupid that even people in their party were like what the fuck are you doing? What the fuck are you doing? That's like if you like right-winger started going. My name is Bob. I'm a patriot and I believe in Jesus Christ like everybody Hey, hey, hey, hey Bob. We're just talking about the infrastructure. We just we're just gonna fix the road Bob calm down Bob My name is Bob. Yeah Just just resist resist resist You know that's what Ben Shapiro told me what that like you should just not do it and and that it's like one of those things like you might want to murder someone but you shouldn't because it's a sin. I'm like yo, I think it's dead. You met any gay guys? You know any gay guys?

Just clench that b-hole and pray. But first of all, what are they supposed to do? Pretend they like girls? Have you met gay guys? Like I actually don't know any gay guys. met gay guys like I said, okay? They actually they're real okay It's like thinking that a bear is a fucking teddy bear an actual gay guys a real thing leave them the fuck alone Let them fuck guys you weirdo you bowtie wearing clipboard having fucking weirdo. What do you care? What do you care? They want to fuck each other who it's like here? I feel like we're surrounded by pearl clutchers, you know? Everywhere I turn, it's pearl clutchers. It's also why is that pleasure so forbidden?

For a lot of people that are like pro-lifers, gay sex should be your favorite sex. Because nobody's going to have a baby, there's going to be no abortions. You know how many abortions the gay community has? Fucking zero. If everyone's going to hell, for sure they should get a pass. At least they haven't killed any fucking babies. Right? So is it okay if gay guys massage each other? Is that okay?

Oh, that's fine. Oh yeah, yeah, you can give each other back rubs and foot rubs and butt rubs. Fine, but just don't touch the dick. That's crazy. That is absolutely crazy. Ariel has a joke about this. That is absolutely crazy. If you can get a job, if you're a gay dude, you can get a job rubbing backs and butts and feet for $50 an hour or you could rub dicks for $150.

Like, it seems like it's quicker, you know? Get to the point, make your money. Who cares? What do you care? Do you wanna touch his feet? You don't, right? You're doing it for money. You don't wanna touch his dick either. The argument I guess would be it was like a slippery slope to all the gender stuff.

Well, it's a slippery slope, here it is. Yeah, I don't know if I found the right one. Let's just try it, let's just try it. Well, that was it. We're mad at you, we're mad at you. Why? Ah, shit, I forgot. We forgot.

Hey Ken! Dad, you need new tennis shorts. Why? The part said everyone could see your hoon nannies at eye. Oh, maybe because I put too much of Kylie's lip puffer on my lips. That goes on the lips on your face Are you serious? I paid 80 grand for that cooch. So maybe everyone should see it

You're embarrassed your asshole Yeah, you gotta push it it's a lock yeah, we until I buzz you. Okay, push it. Why did you open it? There was a weird buzzing noise. Yeah, that means open the door. It's a lock. You have to wait until I buzz you, Jesus Christ. I love him so much. I love him. He's just not right. This is better than anything that Comedy Central has over in South Park.

No, yeah. And they fucked it up. Yeah. And the thing is, when they were doing it over there, here's the problem. First of all, they were using better technology. So, and I think that's what, one of the things that makes it fun is how shitty it looks Yeah, you know because you don't really think it's Kim Kardashian. You don't really think it's Caitlyn Jenner The stuff he does is perfect. They were doing it with like high-end stuff. All right, and it's kind of a creepy

Right, right. I think the one with Caitlyn Jenner having sex with Trump. It might not it might be one of those like lost Recordings, maybe he I don't yeah. I don't think he's ever even released it. It's Hilarious I should have smarties hilarious. I've got my friend as it pretty sure trumps on the bottom. Yeah If I remember correctly There I don't know these networks are done. Like, how, what? Unfortunately, they're hamstrung, right? They're hamstrung by their format, they're hamstrung by the fact that-

The investors. They have to have commercials every five to seven minutes. They're hamstrung by that. Then they're hamstrung by the fact that they're on commercial television, so there's language restrictions and content restrictions. You're not gonna take a risk. The people that are the producers and the executives,

they're the ones who get to make the decisions as to whether or not you should take a risk. And generally speaking, unless a show is really successful, like South Park, South Park, they stay out of the conversation, like leave those fucking guys alone. They're geniuses. Let them do what they're gonna do. Let them do what they're gonna do,

and it's gonna be amazing. But if you're a beginner, they're not gonna do that. No. They're not gonna take that chance. And because they're not gonna take that chance and because they're not gonna take that chance because they have this weird relationship with their advertisers And they can't be free they're never gonna be able to compete with someone like Kyle No, and why would he you would have to offer him a lot of money to even make that worth it? Yeah, but even if you did you'd have to let him do that Yeah, like the thing is about Kyle's like if Kyle was on the staff of a regular Comedy Central show, you know, as a writer or producer, he would not be able to shine. You got to leave him alone.

Well, this is why I think Shane dodged a huge bullet. Yes. Because man, how hamstrung he would have been working. He would have still done his shit. Of course. He would have gotten heat and people got mad at him, but he would have been the same guy He's yeah But I still think like you get rained even the one that he did when he was a guest the funniest Sketch of his they didn't air it. Yeah. Yeah, but that's just they don't want to there's there's like no There's like real internal cockfighting. Yeah on that show the people No, there's like real internal cockfighting on that show that people have explained about like who's sketches get picked and who's not get picked.

And there's been a lot of accusations of like certain writers taking premises from younger writers. That's what Jim Brewer said. Like they have a database of stuff they're working on and then someone would just see what you're working on and then steal it and write something. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. Phil Hartman told me about that, too. Yeah, Phil Hartman told me there's all these,

it's weirdly competitive and backstabby. He was a harsh, like when Phil first came over to News Radio, it took him a while to just relax and be friends with us. Yeah. Because he almost thought of us as being like fellow cast members on SNL. So this is like this combative sort of distance relationship. Interesting. And the cast of News Radio wasn't like that at all. We were all getting drunk together and having fun and laughing.

It seems like it's competitive SNL. Oh yeah. Yeah. It's not just competitive. It's like backstabby competitive according to Jim Brewer. He hated it. He just could not deal with the way that things were done. It's like high pressure too and very stressful. It's also a prestigious position that people are fighting for. You're a writer on SNL, you're a producer on SNL. This is like you're in that hungry part of your career where you're making things happen

and you're competing with all these other people. When it was good, it was great. Oh, but it's only great when you have wild people who you let do funny things. Yeah. You can't do a lot of the things that they used to do. Oh, God, no. It was like Chevy Chase and Richard Pryor, when they were like, I'm going to say a word and tell me what you think.

Yeah. What's the first word that comes out of your mouth? It's like, you couldn't, there's no chance in hell comes out of your mouth? It's like you couldn't there's no You couldn't do any of that now you might be able to land shark You know, but like even the fucking samurai thing that John Belushi's yeah, you couldn't do that because it's cultural appropriation You can't be a Japanese guy They they're broken, but do you think Hollywood is, like with AI and all this, do you think that it stands a chance?

Yeah, it'll make awesome movies. They're still gonna make movies, but they're gonna make movies entirely on a computer. The people that are gonna be fucked are the actors and the writers. They're fucked. And then the animators, they're fucked. They're fucked.

Everybody's fucked. All these special effects houses, you're fucked. Everybody's fucked. There's not effects houses, you're fucked. Yeah. Everybody's fucked. There's not a chance in hell that you survive. They won't just use the technology to... They don't need you. Improve. If a studio is making films,

all they're gonna need is algorithms. They all kinda look like they're made by algorithms already. What's gonna happen is they're gonna do that, and then the number one movie in the world is gonna be a movie that a kid made on his cell phone. He's gonna make it with editing it on fucking iMovie on his phone or whatever it is and he's gonna make it off of his cell phone

and it's gonna be like the Blair Witch project. Or like Napoleon Dynamite. It's so real. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, but special effects and all that shit, that's out the window. Yeah, I don't know, it seems like my friends who are still in Hollywood and LA,

they've been, we've been talking and they're like, the wheels are coming off the bus out here, like they had a strike and they're like, and we never recovered really, and now the work is drying up because they are just using AI. Well, it's not just that, they're gonna be able

to make real films real quick for real cheap. And they're gonna do it and it's gonna cripple that business. And if those films make any money, if they're any good, if people like them, it's gonna be so strange, man. So many jobs are gonna be useless. We are literally giving birth to our successor.

And we're all like, oh, Meta's got an AI now. Let's get some questions. Do you use AI at all? Zero. I have a Samsung Galaxy S24 Ultra that has some AI features that I thought were interesting. One of them was you can go to a website and it will summarize the website for you. That's kind of cool.

And there's some other things it does. It summarizes notes for you, transcribes notes, but other than that. There's good things like for transcription, stuff like that. I think that it is useful. It can do it in no time at all. probably should ask it questions, but it is about things if I have questions about a subject I asked I was sending Tony a screenshot because I was asking it about the I asked it about the top comedy Podcasts and kill Tony wasn't on there and I was like it's it's shadow banning you Yeah, I was doing that I asked this AI search engine that I've used, you.com.

Well, for sure some of them are curated. Some of the results are curated, just like Google results are curated. It's very difficult to get certain stories now. If you try to Google certain stories, things that have happened in the past, very hard to find. And it seems like DuckDuckGo has been compromised too. Oh no, not DuckDuckGo.

Yeah, I used to think that it was really Go, but it just seems to mirror the results of Google now. So where do you go? Where it didn't use to refer to any weird stuff. There's Brave. Brave has a search engine that I think is, with no algorithm. It's not, I don't think it's curated. I think there's a few other ones that you can go to that are like small and search engines.

Like they're all tied into the same thing, right? They're all tied into this great database in the world. I just don't know, I don't know what's going on behind the scenes that if you Google certain things, it will only give you positive things about a person. And if you Google other people, it'll only give you positive things about a person, and if you Google other people, it'll only give you negative things. Yeah, doesn't it seem though like tech

is shifting a little more rightward? No, only X. But I mean, didn't frickin' Zuckerberg the other day come out and be like, that was the most badass, or was that AI? No, no, it was real, he said that. But how much of a say do you really think Zuckerberg has over the entire business of Metta?

Right. Yeah, he's the owner, the CEO, the big dog, but he's also one human being. Hunting people in Maui. He's just, look, yeah, he's doing jujitsu. He's really into a lot of fun things. Yeah. You know, he's having a good time, right? Yeah. I mean, he's doing jujitsu. He's really into a lot of fun things. You know, he's having a good time, right? I mean, he's not there every day.

For sure, people are getting shadow banned, and it's not like he's behind the scenes pulling the triggers. It's a company, and it's a giant, huge company that is, like all these companies, heavily influenced by advertiser dollars. Yeah, Dumpster Fire, we get that a lot from people. We get emails constantly that they've been unsubscribed.

Like, I get one a day. And we've reached out to YouTube and been like, hey, why does this happen? They're like, well, if you can get a screen recording of that happening. I'm like, so someone's supposed to record themselves being unsubscribed, like this is impossible, then maybe they'll investigate it.

And Dumpster Fire is, you know, we're kind of like, like my friend the other day was like, the shit you say on that show, like I'm like, we're fine flying under the radar. It's okay. Yeah, but you're not, no one is. Even people that are kind of flying under the radar. They're not There's they know the the algorithms picking up things you say oh, yeah

They know they know what you're talking about and they don't like when people are questioning certain narratives No, no, no, and we it's funny. I like our slogan for dumpster fires We make burgers out your sacred cows, and it is so funny back to like our tribalism thing Everyone has like their thing. Yeah, where you'll say something. They're like, haha. We love you in the minute You're like and then blah blah blah and they're like Take how dare you and that's all they hear That was your thing. I'm sorry. I stepped on your third rail. Yeah. Yeah You need rubber shoes, bitch

Yeah, yeah, you need rubber shoes, bitch. Yeah. The whole thing is stupid. And it's very unfortunate there's no real competitors like a Twitter that's just a video thing like YouTube is. He's trying though. Yeah, I mean, maybe he'll be able to do it. It's possible if anybody's going to do it, Twitter's going to do it. He's going to do it.

I mean, thank God we would not know the president wasn't dead. No, I'm just kidding. I'm just spreading conspiracy. Do you think that that's a guy in a suit? Let's watch the video. Are you okay? Biden, no, I got something in my eye. You want to get it out?

No, no, no, no, it's nothing. You want to put some water in there? No, I think it's actually just a cigar ash. Do you want, do you have eye drops? No, don't worry about it. I'm fine. I'm a mom now. Find a video of, I know, thanks mom.

I want to show the video of Biden walking up the stairs of Air Force One. Walked a little too sprily for my money. But can we talk about just how objectively insane this is right now? That we're arguing whether or not the president is really alive? But also, like, everything that's happened in the past, what is it, 10, 11 days? And there's a large, we were all talking about this before he started recording, there's a large population of people who are acting like this is all just normal. Like, oh, what's the big deal? All the like people who were probably still

wearing masks, they're all like, oh, what's the big deal? This is, I'm like, if this was Trump and he was install, like if just parties, and this was happening with Republicans, it would be literally Hitler going on the end of democracy. It's fucking Banana Town. Zoom in this fake Biden real quick. Just kidding. Go full screen. Not him. He has no idea where he is.

This is sad. He's walking pretty good. I don't know. This is sad. Or that's a 40 year old guy in a suit But Nearly got assassinated has there been those hands was a young hands he dropped out of the race with a notes apology like I Want to analyze this like the Patterson Gilman bigfoot footage? Yeah, what is these gate I want to study his gate compared to the other. Yeah, I want to see his gate. I want to study his gate with fucking AI software.

Hey, chat GPT. Tell me if this is the real Joe Biden based on how he walks. I did see someone put... It also could be fake. They put the audio of the phone call in to like 11 labs and it said it was like 98% chance it wasn't real. Yes. Yeah, I sent that to...

Yeah. Let me send that to you too, Jamie. When I texted you about Yeah, let me send that to you too, Jamie. When I texted you about Trump, it was like, I was like, is this the first, it's fucked up that we even live in a time where all of our first reaction, which rightfully is, is this real? Like when I heard about Trump, I was like, is this AI? Yeah, everything seems fake. People were thinking that, I mean, wasn't, didn't that one lady, um, tweet that she thought that, uh, Trump only got shot in the head so he doesn't go to jail. Wait. Oh, so it was him. She was trying to, I'll tell you right in a second after I sent that thing to

Jamie. Um, this is, I mean, I get kind of turned on by all the chaos cause I come from it. Like I do, I'm like, please stop. I'm going to start masturbating to Twitter. It's too much. It's just too hot. It's so crazy. It's just like every day it's crazier.

OK, who it is? Gail Helt. She said, so it says, this is like Aaron Rupert said, Nancy Mace apparently said this. I guess it was on one of those news channels. Donald Trump literally took a bullet for our country and this lady posts, no he didn't, he was hit with a bullet because he's desperate to stay out of prison.

Now supposedly these are deleted tweets, so this might be bullshit. So we have to find out that because the Russians are always trying to keep us at each other's throats, ladies and gentlemen, and then there's the it for Chan trolls and so that might not even be a real tweet Yeah, so it's fine. If that's a real tweet. Otherwise, I'm gonna make you cut that out so we don't get sued Who is gail hate first of all Helped gail helts HELT. Why would you get sued? By who? People sue you if you read a fake tweet. Oh, with their name on it. What Twitter account should I look up? The Twitter account. Hold on, sorry. This is amazing. I know. Hilarious. It's G-H-E-L-T.

It's G H E L T But it feels like the Trump things already out of the news cycle, oh yeah, what's the big deal you just got shot in the head Yeah, no press conference nothing did you get rid of her account That's the lady yeah So that's that's the that's the claim. CIA analyst. CIA analyst. Honeypot. Don't click on it.

What? So she killed her account after this. This is weird. Yeah. And do you know that Biden, when he announced that he was not going to seek reelection, it was National Ice Cream Day. Boo!

Ha ha ha! I was like, we live in a simulation. Look, okay, context morons. The point was that no, he didn't take a bullet for his country. The point was that he's running to stay out of prison and thus is why he took a bullet. No one believes he set himself up

and you're a fool for trying to twist this into that. Uh, Gaslight, you didn't say it very well if that's what you meant. What? I guess she must have deleted her account. Yeah, you did not say it very well if that's what you meant. If that is what you were trying to say, well, you did a bad job of expressing yourself. You can't call people morons because you literally said that he was hit with a bullet because he's desperate to stay out of prison.

Like that can be interpreted in a lot of ways. This is the end of days. So here's the thing about the AI voice thing. So play this. Okay, now listen. Let's just go on old 11 Labs and see if that's really all they probably used for this. So blue. see if that's really all they probably used for this. So I love it. nerds cannot be stopped. Very likely probability 98% they didn't even really try.

But but he's 98 speak tomorrow to like soon. He's 98 speak to mark to like soon the fucking makeup is gonna speak That 40 year old guy would have them 40 year old hands like I had young man hands He didn't have dead man hands. Oh, I don't know. I don't know but here's the thing If you have a letter like that, okay And this is how he resigns he resignss or says he's not going to run again with a letter. The letter does not have a presidential seal on it. And the letter has a digital signature on it. Right. That's what it was. Right. Okay. Maybe. But before that, before he got COVID, didn't he say that he wasn't going to quit? He did. Right. So. So they killed him. Well, there's been a lot of weird stuff. haven't seen him since then right and then he gets kovat

And then all of a sudden he says he can't and they also said they gave him ten doses of Pax lovid Is that true? Google that because I read that on my that might be some Russian troll shit because they might be saying like they're waiting for doctors They go that would kill him. Why do you give him ten doses? That's fucking insane They're like well, We couldn't kill Trump He might have been exposing a glitch where every few times that app says that it anything was created by it oh Well here's one way to find out why don't we take a segment of us talking right now? Upload it and see if it thinks that we're AI can we do that I can't do that

Upload it and see if it thinks that we're AI. Can we do that? I can't do that How come because we're recording it right now. I have to stop recording it Can we stop recording for just five seconds and then do that? I don't take you know, no Can I record something on your phone and then maybe you upload it to that? I'm just curious. I could get a like imagine. I could get an older podcast and do it. Oh, yeah do that Yeah, pull a chunk up there Let's see. What's up with that? How funny would that be? People would be like then here's the new conspiracy Joe Rogan is AI the government created him That's the whole reason why that show became popular

There is no fucking way they would allow that show to say the crazy shit. They did it's all ops It's all undercover deep ops. Everything's in our controlled opposition That was what they all said about me when I came on the scene when I started writing and talking they were like She's a deep state plant sent to undermine conservatism. Are you know, here's the thing If you were on the outside looking in you probably would think that that's the case But if you want to pay attention to the way this whole administration is going, pay attention to Green, St. Peter, whatever the fucking name is, the White House press secretary accidentally tweeting Trump's post from her account, wrong account, remember that? This is incompetence.

If you look at like the crew of people that's responsible for the press in the White House, they're all like young kids. They're all young kids, first job, and she's their boss, okay? And then you look at that guy that was the fucking Sam Brinton that was stealing women's clothes and he was in charge of nuclear energy. Everywhere you look, Pete Buttigieg, all these people, it's incompetence. Oh, I know. It's massive incompetence glued together. I don't think there's- It's secret service.

I don't think there's a grand I don't think there's a grand plan I think this is what my husband always says a bunch of really incompetent people scheming and clump and banging heads and not knowing what to do and Arguing with each other and afraid to lose their jobs chaos and a dude who's 40 years old in a Biden suit and that's And also the deep state conspiring behind all of it to make it look like it's just these incompetent dummies you know that everybody's somehow or another like some sort of a plant but this is where I could tell you where you would understand me and believe me I think

most of the things that you think are like deep state are not I think this whole thing is way more chaotic than we give it credit for it's not as easy as like they're manipulating us They're controlling us. Yeah, they're fucking trying for sure, but it's not working anymore. And that's part of the problem, right? It's not like before in the past. No one had Internet search access to how much money Nancy Pelosi was making like all right. They just did it. They were doing it forever They just did it that way and no one knew right except the people that also did it right they were doing it, too That's which is why they never call each other out. They're all a bunch of criminals So now that we all know that like this is all

Everything's been exposed to the point where they want to keep justifying the way they're doing things They got to be very clever about it. So I can't wait to find out the results, whether or not I'm AI. You are AI. Whew. Imagine, if the world is a simulation, I might be AI. I was talking to a family member about just the incompetence and secret service stuff and hiring these people, and they're at a, and they're firemen, basically.

And they were telling me that they had to hire like an actual, he's like none of these are lies. They had to hire an autistic kid. And he's like this kid hides in the bathroom and takes naps during the day. But once you kind of hire these neurodivergent people or whatever, you can't really fire them. So they had to like track it and like keep,

and he said another guy they hired who was like something wasn't right, got into a minor fender bender in one of the trucks and like froze up, and he's like, this is a first responder who froze up when they got into and wouldn't get out of the truck. And he's like, I'm not making any of this up. He's like, how am I supposed to fucking work with this shit?

That's crazy. And he was saying the same thing about the Secret Service and all that. He's like, this is a woman who, like, she was like Buds with gel, and she was like from Pepsi before. And instead of putting like some Marine in charge. OK, look, they ran the sample very unlikely. So it was

right. Probability of 2.0%. It's very unlikely this audio was generated with 11 labs. Now we need to do it a few times and see if it keeps doing it. Try it a few times but now we also need to do an AI generator. But hold on a second, that makes sense. Like that means it's accurate. So what I was said the this guy said This is the guy who made the original tweet, right? This is the guy who posted the goofy little glitch that makes 11 lab say his voice was AI generated once every few tests Okay, this is the guy who posted the goofy little glitch Okay, so this was a funny shower thought which yourselves and the entire internet placed a near infinite more about of thought.

What? This person is drawn. This person is out of their fucking mind. Into than I did. Please carry about your business and stop harassing even about being- Did fucking AI write this? Maybe. You could-

Yours truly, the guy whose cringey jokes often go way too far and the internet scares me, please help. Okay. I think he was just fucking around. Maybe. But the point is that we can't listen to anything he's saying now and take it seriously. The other thing though sounded like AI to me. It sounded like there's a weird-

If you could play it again- Timmy. Well no, there's a weird... If you could play it again. Timmy. Well, no. There's a weird fake expression. There's a smell. Like when you hear it, there's a smell. Like there's a bunch... I know yesterday's news is surprising and it's hard for you to hear, but it was the right

thing to do. I know it's hard because you poured your heart and soul into me. It just seems there's something, the heart and soul into me. It's something into me. It's like, it's a robot talking. It's ex machina. It's not a person. Yeah, but it's like triggering your uncanny valley.

100%. It's triggering my bullshit meter. Now I 100% am only saying this because he's missing. He's not missing. If I had not seen, except for the guy in the suit, if there was a time where there was no question about whether Joe Biden was alive and I heard that, I would go, oh, that's probably Joe Biden. Just for full disclosure. Do you think that some accident will happen, or like, oh, a medical emergency before the speech?

Well, that's what Alex Jones is saying. Alex Jones is saying they failed to kill Trump, so now they're going to kill Biden because they can't have him run against Trump, because he can't beat Trump. But if Trump got shot, Biden would win in a landslide. I was playing something that I think was used on me about it was Alex I think and my husband's like turn that off He's like Bridget. I can send you a 17th tweet thread debunking the first two minutes of that from a guy in the army I'm like, okay, my husband's like needs to get red-pilled. He's he's just a skeptic He thinks he doesn't attribute to malice what he can attribute to He doesn't attribute to malice what he can attribute to

Incompetence he well that's smart, but also malice is real so you have to look at both and you can't be biased in one side Well, I think that's why we make a good balance. Yeah, I'm like no it's a conspiracy Well, I don't think everything's a conspiracy because I know that some conspiracies that I've personally been accused of being involved in aren't real So I'm like, okay, so people are just suspicious. I think there's a lot of suspicion and also rightly so. Right. How can you not be? Conspiracies are 100 percent real. By the way, I can probably think of three episodes that you and I have done where we talked about how Biden was too old and we got called conspiracy

theorists for saying that. I had a text message from a friend who was saying, don't you know that Biden has a stutter? I go, when did he get this stutter? Because if you go and listen to him when he was running for president in 1988, he spoke smooth. Smooth as silk. We could check this out.

This person says they recreated the phone call using AI. And apparently it sounds a lot like it, if you want to see. Okay. And then go on to when they went into and I've been honored and That's not him. That's somebody else's voice. Hmm. All right. So that wasn't Joe Biden.

Okay. I mean, maybe they're trying to prove a point. But either way, we know for sure that AI is real. AI can make you say basically anything they want to say. We've done it with me. Oh yeah. You know who does it all the time? Duncan. Duncan will have like Tony Hinchcliffe apologizing for things that he never did and admitting that he's a rainy street assassin.

I love Duncan. I love his stand up too. It's just like, I love his long, like I want to be in his brain. I want to crawl into his brain. You know what, nobody's in there. You can't get in there. I want to crawl into his brain and look around. You get a contact high, just smelling his brain.

But he did a thing with Johnny Pemberton where Johnny Pemberton pretended to be like a CIA undercover agent or something like that. They changed his voice. They changed his appearance, they changed everything in video, in real time. So he's taught, so it's, you know what Johnny looks like? So it's Johnny Pemberton, he looks like a 12 year old kid and he looks like a completely different person. He's saying absolutely ridiculous shit and it sounds like this other person's voice and

this is all like you could be you know Morgan Freeman yeah you could start talking and they could have AI take your voice convert it to Morgan Freeman's voice take your image take every expression you make opening your mouth every smile you make and convert it to Morgan Freeman doing the exact same thing this is why there's no pictures of my kid on the internet. There was this creepy video going around and they took all these pictures of this nine-year-old and it was in Norway somewhere and they grew her up, had her talking, had her,

and because of parents had posted all this stuff and she was asking for them to come. It, my most judgy mom opinion, and I don't have many, is we know too much to be doing to put our kids online like before they're able to like whatever was there because it's not there it's it's not they can't understand what you're doing first of all with AI yeah you can't know how there's the shit they do in Japan they're having like a huge problem with like turning these images people are putting of

their kids into child porn. Of course. It's like a huge fucking problem. Of course, they're doing that with everybody. I guarantee you, every fucking human being that is out there on Facebook and Instagram, someone's turning you into a porno film. Yeah, I don't know, I'm just, I, it's crazy. It's crazy. I mean they that was a big problem with celebrities, right? They were taking celebrities and face-swapping them and turning them into porn stars

Yeah, and there's no I mean there was like a whole thing in Beverly Hills about all these there were these teenagers were doing it To each other as like, you know, they were all just being me teens and it's crazy I don't know how you even, and there aren't laws against it, which there should be, but I don't even know how you litigate it. They would have to get ahead of it. And they can't. It's too late.

No, they can't. All the technology's out there, and then there's also not enough people that understand it that are in the government. And it's like whack-a-mole, like you just, you get rid of one and it pops up 10 other places. Right, and how are you gonna get rid of the ones that are in other countries? Yeah going to know it's not going to it's not He's just uses a fucking VPN log into that other country. Yeah download it. No, it's bad. It's wild

No, it's wild. It's only gonna get wilder. Yeah, this is like I mean Elon talks about this all the time like how it's just the dawn of this. Yeah and talks about this all the time, like how it's just the dawn of this. Yeah. This is the dawning of the age of Aquarius. Did you see his video yesterday with Jordan? Which one? Where he was talking about what happened to his kid

and how- You mean Elon. Elon, yeah. Yeah, yeah, I did see that, yeah. It was emotional. It's horrible. Yeah, I think a lot of people have become kind of, I mean, for lack of a better word, red-pilled by that kind of stuff.

And they should be. Yeah. The new California thing. Ugh! Didn't you, explain to people what it is. I mean. It's so nuts, you hear it and you go, there's no way they did this.

There's no way they took away power from the parents. Yeah, but. There's no way they don't inform the parents. That, I mean, that had kind of been going on, but now they've just put it into law that you essentially don't have to, you know, the people who would fight against it would say, oh, they're outing these kids to their parents, but basically a kid can go in and call themselves Jack if they're Jill at home home and the school doesn't have to tell the parents that they're identifying as a boy, that they're, they're doing that, they're dressing,

that they're being called by a completely different name. There's no requirement. It's just so crazy to me. And I'm sure Scott Wiener is behind this because he's behind every creepy ass bill in that state. It's crazy to me that you are telling adults to keep secrets about the kids from the parents. Like that's generally something that's a huge red flag. It's a huge red flag and you're also you have activists who are teachers. That's a fact. Yeah.

That's a fact. A lot of the teachers are teachers specifically because they want to be able to influence young kids That's a fact. Yeah, and some of them are really good teachers and they have this idea They're gonna help these kids and influence these kids in a positive way And some of them are fucking crazy people that are locked into an ideology and they want to convert these kids into that Ideology, you have five years old and six year old kids. You shouldn't have fucking pride flags in the school That's ridiculous. If you have this big pride display in the school and everyone's wearing rainbows, you are incentivizing kids to think that going in one direction or the other is better.

You're pushing them. You're influencing them in a weird way and you might be a fucking crazy person. Well, it's also like Helen Joy said, she had this brilliant clip. She was talking about how there's no way out. If you're a parent who's supported this, like every time you hear about somebody who's advocating for this, legislating it, legislating kids being able to get puberty blockers or whatever, it's somebody who has a kid of their own. And she was saying such a brilliant clip

She was basically saying like you they're doubling down because it's that or admit that they've done a horrific thing to their child, right? Yeah, that's what it is It's no it's the same thing with people that got kovat and got vaccine injured and didn't want to tell people Does that happen a lot a lot? Yeah. Oh, I know people that got vaccine injured. Chris Cuomo. Oh, right. Right. Right. vaccine injured and didn't talk about it until CNN fired him. You know, he's like, Guess what? I'm one of you. He's like, fires is not paying for my checks anymore. Yeah, the whole thing is just a again, a normal pattern of human behavior and thinking and this, this whole queer transA, B, I, T plus thing,

it's all attached to an ideology. And the crazy thing for a lot of gay people is they are looking at this trans thing, a lot of gay people that I talk to, they think it's homophobic. They think a lot of these guys who think that they're girls will eventually just be gay men. And that a lot of them go through it during puberty and when you are telling them that they really are going to live their authentic self and you're saying

things like this. Pray the gay away. It is a very similar thing. It's the same thing. That is the same thing. It's conversion therapy. I did a whole piece, How Pride Lost the Public, and I interviewed Douglas Murray, all these brilliant, I wish I could have just posted every interview I did with all these individuals because they're all so brilliant, but these guys have all been sound, and women have all been sounding the alarm, and lesbians are really getting erased.

You go on a lesbian app and it's like, I joked on Dumpster Fire in like 2019 that we're on our way to like suck my dick bigot and now we're here, like we've been there for years. It's a lot of men who identify as being a woman who say they're a lesbian. Yeah. Which is crazy. They're not even, but my lesbian friends are like,

they're not even identifying. They're just straight up men on the lesbian app saying like I'm I'm a lesbian. Yeah Yeah, they're not even trying to look like you want to date with them and they just have lipstick on hi like what I? like girls We try to say you fucking bigot. I'll fuck you in your ass like wait What are you saying? It's not good. It's so nuts. And it's also like these, some of these people who identifies women, they think that because they're women it's okay to punch other women.

And I've seen a lot of that. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. I've seen a lot of that. Yeah, yeah. Like trans women getting in fist fights with biological women, like what is going on here? This is so crazy it's it's I think it's lost a lot of support though don't you think do you feel like it has or not yeah it's lost a giant chunk but there's still a lot of really

confused people that don't know what's going on they read mainstream newspapers and rarely they work in a bubble. Generally, it's like a liberal bubble. They work in a bubble that's also influenced by DEI. It's also influenced by the culture of the workforce in general. And then these people, they don't hear everything. They don't get all the data. They don't have time to research these things, so it takes them a lot longer to catch on that what a lot of this is, is mentally ill people that are trying to infiltrate into women's spaces.

That's a lot of it. So you have people that have legitimate gender dysphoria that really wanna be identifying as a woman, and then you have creeps. And to not identify the creeps and to pretend the creeps don't exist, you're not fucking helping anybody. By the way. You should be protecting these women in prisons You should it's like rape shelters and women shelters

You just have these guys who are like to think that someone who's a predator and has committed crimes wouldn't try and Manipulate the system. Yeah, it's, oh, I don't understand that willful. After we get off there, I'll tell you my bit about it. Because it's so stupid. The whole thing is so nuts. It's just so nuts that it's so pervasive that it's actually made its way into prisons. Well, it made its way into,

remember the Supreme Court lady when they asked her, Katanji Brown Jackson? Oh yeah, and couldn't answer what a woman is. Yeah, but all these people should be on record. The problem that we're having is that people need to push anyone who's saying, oh, this is just gender affirming care. So what exactly is that? I want you on record explaining what that is.

So you're okay with giving kids puberty blockers so that they may not be able to have children or orgasms or X amount of things. Have you had any, I've talked to a lot of people in the past however many years that I've done my podcast and the ones that sat with me the most and the most upsetting are all the detransitioners, the kid detransitioners I've had on the podcast. They're, those interviews are so hard and upsetting and it is fucking

criminal that there is even more than like ten and they're churning them out. Yeah and there's the number of gender affirmation care clinics that exist in this country. But by the way Europe is like pushing back against it and we're not and a lot of it is because Europe does have the You know like universe. Yeah, so they actually have to follow science because otherwise they're all paying for it. Exactly Yeah, and here's just like I captured money grab like you to start Well you and not just that but what you alluded to earlier that you have to take All those people that had done this now. They're in trouble. Yeah, like now people can get sued the lawsuits can I hope they get sued. Well, that's the only literally in this country that feeds off of money

It's the only way that's gonna stop it. Yeah, listen. You have to recognize folks that this is a country that did Lobotomies. Yeah until what? 1965 or something like that Something crazy like that. I don't know. I don't know. It might have been like 68. I think it was 1968 Google Jamie, when do they end lobotomies they did Who knows how many thousands of lobotomies? Well, that's like all the women who got put in mental wards for hysteria. 67 67.

Yeah, that's not that long. That's not that long. No, no. So they it had to end with the death of the person it was performed on. That was it. They're like enough. Don't scramble brains.

Like, listen, we fucked up one person. We made a few really cool people. Walter Jackson Freeman the second what What portal of hell does that guy find himself in today? When did he die he died in 72? So is his idea So he died shortly after it was made illegal. He fucking missed it. He missed prosecution the idea that he performed 3,500 lobotomies. He scrambled the brains of 3,500 people

and 490 of them died as a result of the treatment. Do they still do electroshock therapy? Yep, yep. 490 people died and the rest of them just got turned into vegetables. So 310 just got turned into fucking squash. Oh my god. So crazy. How many people were lobotomized in the 50s? Almost 20,000. Oh my god. Performing in the United States and proportionally more in the United Kingdom. A large number of patients were gay men." Oh my god. They scrambled their brain to get the gay out of there. That's worse than pray the gay away. Yeah, scramble the gay away. Jesus Christ.

Scalpel the gay away. Jesus Christ. Yikes. Oh man. Oh my god. No. What was that movie Pie where he gives himself a lobotomy or whatever at the spoiler Oh my god Where he gives himself a lobotomy or whatever at the spoiler alert You see that put pie no that movie he gave himself up. I feel like at the end of that movie I don't want to spoil it It might have just spoiled it Yeah, thinking of some guy that invented something insane Somewhere in the UK and eventually he was tried for being gay

It's like on the tip in the back of my brain I'm like that guy remember that guy remember that story some guy this like incredible That's it That's it. That's the robot thing. Yeah. Yeah. So has Lex passed that yet? No, Lex is a robot. Pull that up. Pull that up like what happened to him. Okay, so here it is. There are a number of high profile arrests and trials, including that of scientist, mathematician and wartime code breaker Alan Turing convicted in 1952 of gross indecency. He accepted treatment with female hormones, chemical castration, as an alternative to prison. Turing committed suicide in 54. What? Oh my god. How crazy. Again, not that long ago. Not that long ago. And that sounds today insane. Yeah. And guess what, you fucks. That's what it's going to sound like 50 years from now when people start talking about what you did to kids.

Yeah, no. And they're all growing up. This is crazy. Yep. Homosexuality remained illegal until 1967 in England and Wales. And until 1980 in Scotland. Holy shit, Scotland. When?

1866, marriage was defined as between a man and a woman preventing future same-sex marriages. So they put a law in the books in 1866 in Scotland over a hundred years later. What about here though? When did it become... That's a good question. Well I remember in 2013... In the United States. 2013 Democrats were saying that it should be between a man and woman that's what marriage is marriage but it was illegal in the States wasn't it yeah yeah but imagine that imagine Democrats saying should be between a man and woman 2003 yeah that's whoa wow we are way behind Scotland sorry Scotland sorry to give you your hard time.

You guys are so far ahead of us. I was feeling like we were pretty behind Scotland. 2003, I was on Fear Factor. 2003, gay rights proponents had another bit of happy news. You know, Supreme Court in Lawrence

versus Texas struck down the state's anti-sodomy law. Oh, okay So wasn't like illegal to be gay was illegal to do gay stuff. I mean same thing No, you have to do the Ben Shapiro method. You can be gay. Just don't do it. Oh My god, yeah, but so it was never illegal to be gay in the United States Of course it was it had to been absolutely illegal But no just joking aside sodomy laws are that makes it being gay illegal aren't there still some on the books There's still like weird

Sodomy and profanity laws that are on the books and probably some You said some weird. I wouldn't be mass. No, they have weird stuff on the books. I remember reading about this. I don't know if they still have it, but the reason you couldn't have sororities in certain places is because like seven, no, it was considered like a coven. Like too many women living in a house.

Bunch of witches, they're smart. They probably want to track their menstrual cycles. It's fucking dirty witches. So this podcast I was listening to, she was saying that, I've never known this, I've always wondered, but her, I guess she's some like neuroscientist woman, and I can't remember her name right now. She was saying that it's because men would have to impregnate as many people as they could because if they went out and hunted, sometimes they wouldn't even come back.

They'd go like find another similar tribe and just stay with them. Jesus. And so they had to, in order to like keep up the population, they had to make sure that they could impregnate as many women at the same time. And that's why women's cycles sync up.

Hmm. I always thought it was just like people being competitive. Like one woman was like, if I'm'm gonna bleed you're all gonna fucking bleed It's all interesting theories because you know so many of the things That people did back in the day were based on this fact that human beings didn't live very long, right? And that infant mortality was really high, you know, like they had a lot of Fertility rituals that yeah back then. Yeah. Yeah, I Think my name is the Irish goddess of fertility

Which explains how I got pregnant in 43 You want a fun law for Texas? Yes prohibited possession of more than six dildos Yeah, you greedy the obscene you don't even have six holes you greedy fuck obscene device laws declares it a crime to possess six or more obscene devices or Identical or similar obscene articles so you can have like six butt fuck magazines But I think you can still get married as cousins in certain states to Look at this these infernal states too. Like 26 states. Hold on, hold on. Go back. Look at this. These infernal devices include dildos, so in Texas you can legally own more guns. Wait, what site is this? This

is an article on mental floss and it's like top 10 weird sex laws that are still in place. Let me finish this sentence. So in Texas you can legally own more guns and display them in public than you can sex toys, as some dildo wielding campaigners have pointed out. I don't want to know what that dildo get married in Nebraska if your partner is a sexually transmitted disease You get the herbs that's a wrap you can't cohabitate, North Carolina You can't have a person hold on We have a person with with a partner if the couple is unmarried what yeah It's illegal to live with a partner if the couple is unmarried. What? Yeah. It's illegal to live with a partner if the couple's unmarried. So you can't live in North Carolina with a boyfriend or girlfriend? For real?

You can't have sex with them in six states? Six! Which states? Utah. Idaho, Illinois, Massachusetts, Mississippi, and South Carolina. Hilarious. In South Carolina, a false promise of marriage can land you in jail. This is how I hear this. Still in fornication laws that basically decree all forms of non-marital sex illegal, but these laws are rarely enforced. I love fucking get rid of them. Why you got laws on whether or not people can jerk each other off?

Don't flaunt your booby pillows in Kern County, California. Ooh, what's up in Kern County? It's indecent. Oh, booby pillows. Thousand feet of a highway. What does that mean? Flashing your titties on the side of the road. I think literal like, the tit pillow, like a boob pillow.

Like a pillow that looks like a boob. Like boobs. Boob pillows, or just boobs? It might have been a thing at some point. Public articles. I think they're boobs. Hold on, public sale of articles depicting female breasts No, it is a bill pillow. Yeah

Stuffed objects known as booby pills. I've seen booty pillows, so you can't so those are illegal and so they the problem is passerby's can't talk about the Mississippi you can't sell them by the side of the road Can't talk about polygamy in Mississippi. You can't sell them by the side of the road. That's what the law is. What the fuck were booby pillows for? I've never heard of them until 13 seconds ago. Is it just a...

I don't know. I mean, this is just stupid. It's just, look, got some tits. Like guys who have rubber nuts hanging from their fucking trail hitch. It's also just north of LA, apparently. Is it legal to have rubber nuts hanging from your trail hitch? Is that legal in Texas let's find out that only even count as a dildo that's just your Saturday big things in Texas on the side of your wheels they like come out have you seen these oh I don't know if you're allowed to yeah yeah I found

out about those those are crazy those on his Cadillac they're I saw a car with them. I'm like what the fuck yeah That doesn't seem like it's aerodynamic. It's not good for your neighbors either. I saw them on a truck Well, you definitely could scratch someone yeah, or pop their tires 100% yeah, yeah, that seems like some Texas shit I've been here. I've been here now Have we talked since I've been here. I've been here now Have we talked since I've been here since Almost a year like a little over a year. I don't think you've been on the podcast in the last year Oh been since you moved here. Oh, yeah, California dwelling back then Yeah, this is I love it. I love it. It's great out here. Yeah, I love it

but I also love like all the friends I have and the friends that are here and everybody's coming here and Making friends out in the burbs like people are moving out though They said that they're leaving 23 more people for the first time left Austin then moved here That's good. The rents will go down and stuff. They won't go down. No, they're going down doom spiral No, no, no, they did, they passed a housing thing and they're actually going down. They passed a bill? To like open up for building more housing

and the rents are going down in Austin. Every time you hear about people getting, a lot of my friends have gotten rent like deductions in the past year. Really? And a lot of people are leaving. I had two people in my little basic bitch suburb. They were like in the Facebook community,

which I love just, I love it. It's like the drama. I love just watching it. They were like, we're getting the fuck out of here. I'm going back to California. And I was like, where are you going? Thank you. They're like, it's too hot.

And they're like Sacramento. I'm like, what's up? Like Sacramento, I thought it'd be like the beach or something, but how different is Sacramento from it's pretty hot But it's a dry heat. It's a different kind of notice and people I don't know a lot of Californians came here and are leaving Just cuz the heat yeah I know pussies. I know it's nothing. It's really not that bad. My husband loves it. We're out there We are friend become became really good friends with the side surfs.

You know, they did. The cake people. And they're like our good homies, and we celebrate. We like our living such a, it's such a like, weirdly American life. Like we go to the, we go have like barbecues, and you know, our kids play like it's so,

I'm not looking over my shoulder for like crazy people every second. There's a reason why people move to the suburbs. No, the suburbs are great. Yeah. When you have kids. Especially if you want quiet. Oh, they're so quiet out there.

That's what you want. Yeah. You're better off with a little bit of quiet. And you can see the stars like my My daughter is just like obsessed with space. She's like that is that sat she knows all the planets. She's just like She's thriving which is all I can ask for is I want to live about an hour outside. Yeah, me too, but I can't we're out and drive in for shows and that's it Yeah, I can't I can't yet

I mean this was big we got because my husband was like let's go further and I was like that will be Like one hour out and then drive in for shows and that's it. Yeah, I can't. I can't yet. I mean this was big. We got, cause my husband was like, let's go further. And I was like, that will be prohibitive to everything I want to do. And so we had to kind of split the difference. He would be further out. There's plenty of good spots to live out here though. It's good.

You know, you can live a half hour outside and still be cool. Like where Red Band lives, it's real quiet. I'm up by them. Yeah, it's great. It's great. It's beautiful out there too. Yeah. And there's lots of great restaurants. It's like, it's a nice place to live. It's also like a really amazing place to do comedy now. Oh, the scene is so... It's the first time in our lifetime where a scene has emerged. I wonder why. Um, so weird. Crazy. Who's behind that no it's it is actually

Doing it and like being around all the young hungry like it's I've fallen in love with it in a way that I did When I first started it, you know, it's just seen how and it's also just so diverse actually Ideologically diverse Austin is a weird place. You just don't, with all of the, like your audiences, they're all tourists, and then the local audiences, you never really know. It's not like when I was in LA, I kinda knew what I was dealing with, or if you were outside of, you know, in Valencia,

you knew also what you were dealing with. Here, you're like, it's a smatter. It's truly like a purple kind of town. It's an interesting place. Yeah, it's exciting. It's just wayatter, it's truly like a purple kind of town. It's an interesting place. Yeah, it's exciting. It's just way better than California, where we were living. We're living also in a place that was captured by the entertainment industry, and that, you realize,

that has a toxic radioactive glow that affects everything it touches. It does. Whether you think you're in the music business, or you think you're in the entertainment business, or you think you're in the entertainment business, or you, I'm not a performer, I'm not trying to get famous, everyone's affected by what you're trying to accomplish. All the people on the outside that work

in other supportive industries, like that place is defined by the main goal of people that move there, is to somehow or another make it. Right, right. Here it feels very art devoted. You know, it has that Austin kind of like keep it weird and the people seem very, that's the other thing I've noticed, everyone's very supportive. It's not so like cutthroat and it felt, I don't know, it doesn't feel. Well, comedy's like that now. You know, comedy's

like it's not what it used to be. It used to be very cutthroaty. But we realized somewhere along the line that we became, we're assets, we're not like competitors. And the competitors are good. The people that are like rising up, they give you inspiration to do better. It's all good for you. But there's like room, that's the thing that feels like you go to all these different shows.

You know Homeless Pimp? He's doing a whole documentary on the scene. It's really cool. He's like going out to open mics with like young people who moved here, people who have been in 20 years who are moving here. It's really cool. Yeah.

Well, a lot of people that like weren't getting the attention that they deserve somewhere else came here and now they're thriving. Like Brian Holtzman, perfect example. Brian Holtzman was just not getting the love he deserved and now he's got sold out shows. Yeah. And people come to see him because he's crazy.

It's like they want to see. And there's a lot of Tyler Fisher is another one. Yeah. These guys weren't getting any attention where they were and they're really good. You know, and there's more of those. There's a lot more out there. Metzger, Metzger is another one.

Metzger. Yeah. That's why I'm like, we need land out here. Metzger moved here. Oh yes? Yeah, he's here now. No, he told me why I'm like, we need land out here. Metzger moved here. Oh yes? Yeah, he's here now. No, he told me when I saw him, we went out to dinner when they were in town

and he said that they were thinking about it. He's here now. Oh nice. Yeah, I'm so happy. Kim's here now too. Nice, yeah. She just did a show, Kill Tony last night. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah.

And announced it. Yep. She's the newest Austin resident. Yep. Yeah. Kim has a real chance. She has a real chance. Kim went up in front of me in, she's from Orlando and I was doing a gig in Orlando

she's gonna be there visiting her family. She asked to do a set. I'm like yeah for sure. I'm like I was sat and watched. She fucking murdered. I mean murdered. I would have thought she was gonna be way further ahead in her career. Yeah. I think it was like eight years ago, like eight years later. But sometimes people, they're not quite focused the right way, nothing kind of catches, and she went to New York for a while, but now she's out here.

She's got a real chance. Yeah, I love her. We were just in the green room together. She's very funny. Dying, laughing. Very funny. Yep, I'm excited. It's just like it feels, when I first moved to LA

and was in the scene and it was, I had Troy Conrad on my podcast and we were talking about when we were like, when it was like Tuesday nights and Roast Battle was starting and Kill Tony was starting and you were back and it was like this electric time at the Comedy Store and he was saying, you were aware like this is special at the comedy store and he was saying, you know, you were aware,

like this is special, you're capturing something special. And I feel that way about now too. There's just something special happening in Austin with comedy and scene. It feels, that was the thing about LA, I'm like, I feel like I'm driving around a city on hospice. It just feels like a city that's like not doing well. And here it's vibrant and there's growth

and there's all kinds of different scenes and there's tech and there's like, it's just so much live music, it feels very vibrant and alive. Well, a lot of it is because people were just fed up with California and they moved out here and they all came together. And it's all these similarly minded people that wanted to be free to do the fun thing and then really also extra appreciated it now that it was taken away from them for a

while. And then now they have the best place to do it ever. Yeah, and it feels very, it's probably more libertarian than anything else. Yeah, you know, it's more libertarian There's very few conservatives in comedy and even the liberals They're not if you want to be good like you can't be you can't be like full leftist. I can't do it It's so you're handcuffing yourself. It's like running with weights on like, what are you doing? What are you trying to do? You try like you can talk about stuff that you believe in on podcasts, but you're doing a specific art form.

Stand-up comedy is a very specific art form. And the goal is to make people laugh. They're there for comedy. It's not stand-up proselytizing. You know, it's not stand-up virtue clapter. I did a joke about Andrew Tate once, and I got like clapped around. I was like, I'm never doing that joke

Done yeah, it's funny. I don't ever want clapper Oh God some people love it. They just lean towards it and like their punchlines are like spaced out for clapper Yeah, but that's like you're you're evangelizing yeah, they're just not good. That's all it is. They're just not good at comedy I don't want to evangelize. I don Yeah, they're just not good. That's all it is. They're just not good at comedy. I don't want to evangelize. I don't want to. But they're only evangelizing because they're not good at comedy, right? They're not evangelizing because they have the really unique perspective that is like, that people listen to, like Bill Hicks or something.

You go, wow. Oh my god, I never thought about it that way. No. It's clunky dog shit idea from a lazy person that's not good at comedy. And the reason why you suck at this whole virtue signaling thing is the same reason why you suck at comedy. Like you don't have unique thoughts.

You haven't examined your mind enough. You haven't really tried to figure out what's actually funny versus what you want the audience to think of you, which is a lot of what people are doing. Yeah, my good faith interpretation, I guess, would be that they are believers. Like, they're actually believers in their ideology or whatever, and they don't really realize they're proselytizing. They think that they're making jokes about informative

tech. Right, but you have to always run that. You gotta always run that through this filter. And the filter is, if you're not good at comedy, and you don't have a career in comedy, and you're struggling in comedy, trying to get better at comedy, you are constantly trying to get positive reactions from the audience. And if you can't get positive reactions through humor, you will get it through saying something that you think everybody believes in. Right, right, I see. So it's a trick.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's just a shitty trick. It's like a shortcut. It's a shitty trick that works. Yeah, yeah. It's like wearing lipstick and shitting in the women's room. It's a shitty trick that works. It doesn't mean that everybody doesn't know what the fuck is going on, you know? So there's one, like there's also kind of a just goofy alt scene that I love, and there's Ryar Cameron. She works, I think she works in Mothership, but I've seen her at Creek in the Cave.

She has a Thursday night, and she does this bit. I am obsessed with it, about how she's like a deer. It is. Don't give away the bit. I'm not gonna give it away. It's so, no one could do this bit. It's only her, but she is, like, she's so original, so adorable, and like, we must protect her at all costs.

She's just, every time she gets up, and the audience never knows what, cause they just don't know, like, what to do all the time with her. Which is the, I'll be in the back just dying laughing, and the audience is like, what is happening right now? But she is, I mean, she's so special.

She's so special. That's awesome. Yeah. Yeah, there's a lot of different kind of comedy. That's what I love. Yeah, it's a real meritocracy, you know? And one of the things that Adam, when Adam came over from the comedy store,

he was dealing with a lot of pressure. People were saying, why don't you have X amount of blank on the lineup? X amount of women, X amount of gay people with a lot of pressure. People were saying, why don't you have X amount of blank on the lineup, X amount of women, X amount of gay people, X amount of trans, people were really giving him a hard time about everything. And he was worried that he was gonna get in trouble, like people were gonna attack him

and write articles about him. And when he came here, specifically I said, dude, everybody's welcome, but they have to be funny. It's really that simple, It's a complete meritocracy. We're not going to say, let's get more women. No, we're going to give all the women that want a chance to go on open mic nights. Everybody has a chance.

You go up, if you get better, you get asked to do showcase shows. There's a real genuine system. And having a genuine talent coordinator like Adam, who really watches watches he sits down the boat Oh, yeah, I was there last night watching sense. He watches people progress. He watches the door people progress He watches all the new people coming from out of town great feedback Like I love that premise like it's so helpful, you know, this is someone who watches this shit all day long

Someone whose best friends ignore McDonald. Yeah. He really understands comedy. Oh yeah, and also he's hilarious when I sit there back there with him. Oh, he's very funny. He'll make these comments that are funnier than anything that people are saying on stage. Very funny, he can hang. But the point is he really cares about his job,

and his job is free of all the mandates. Yeah. All he has to do is find funny people. Yeah. And look at what happens when you do that. The lineup is so diverse. If you look at all the different people on like showcase nights and different people, like you're going to see every type of gay, straight, black, white, Asian, tall, short, fat, skinny, everything. Whatever the fuck from different parts of

the world, all you have to do is be good at this thing we're all trying to do. We don't care. You're one of the family, no matter what you are, as long as you can do this thing we're doing. And if you can't do this thing we're doing, either figure it out, or I don't know what to tell you. And there's so much opportunity. There are so many shows now. It is crazy.

It's like, yeah, it's amazing. There's like Black Rabbit, and that room is amazing. There's Creek in the Caves. Just five rooms on one street. It's like it's it's yeah, it's amazing. There's like black rabbit and there that room is amazing There's five rigging the game one Street. Yeah, it's not yeah. Yeah. Yeah, it's beautiful And people can walk from and do set the setting guys are doing four or five sets a night Yeah, it's like New York. It is it is it's a it's a unique thing and it's only just begun Yeah, I mean it's only existed for a couple years You know really there was a small scene here was a few good comics that were here and you know, they just didn't have the same push And they also didn't have the same group of killers. They didn't have Shane Gillis move into town

Tim Dillon's got a place here. It's like Tony's here. Brian Simpson's here. Ron White is here It's like there's so Tom Sager is here Christina Christina peas here. It's like there's so, Tom Segura's here. Christina P's here. There's so many fucking people. I'm trying to talk Barton to move in here. We're trying to lure Whitney to come here. Yeah, Whitney's a tough cookie to crack. She did do a joke the other day on Instagram though about how she's like, this is why I'm leaving,

and it was like a perfect time. Yeah, I saw that. I was like, come! Other than how straight men left. Yeah, she'll come eventually. There's where we've got more and more that are coming and there's plenty room for everybody. There's a lot of sets, we do two shows a night in each room.

It's a lot of fun. It's so much fun. And the staff at that place is amazing. I mean, I'm obsessed with Carrie. She is like a woman so close to my heart, I would go to war for her. And all the whole staff is so, like they seem so, they're like happy to be there,

they're so lovely, they're so cool. I don't know, it's like a nice, it's a good vibe. It's not. Yeah, we stole the heart of the Comedy Store. We stole all the best people. We didn't steal them though, they were all unemployed. It was really perfect timing. It wasn't like we poached them from the comedy store when the comedy store needed them. They needed a job and the comedy store wasn't going to be open for another year and a half.

Like those people all came over here when there was nothing going on and they were all now they're employed. And the way we did it, it was almost like the universe wanted it to happen like the universe wanted all these little things to Fall into place to motivate people to get the fuck out of there all these things that fall into place where all of a sudden You're in this town and there's buildings that are available. There's like all these buildings available I know but you we I remember so vividly doing your podcast in 2020 I think was May of 2020, because it was like in the height of another crazy cycle like right now, and you were like, I have a vision. You had a vision as much as like, oh,

it all kind of lined up and like you said on that podcast, I have a vision, you just knew. Yeah, I shouldn't have visions like that. I shouldn't even believe in that. Not like a vision like I saw God. I mean like. No, no, no, no. I mean I'm saying like even like,

yeah I had an idea. Yeah. I had an idea. Yeah. I mean is that. But I probably should have just done it and not told everybody. Telled everybody I had a vision.

I wonder how much of that, because people believe in that, right? They believe in vision boards and manifesting things. This was this podcast I was listening to. She's all about this, like it's the mirror neurons and you put it into the world. But also I think you have to get people excited about an idea.

So whether it's an idea or a vision or whatever you want to call it People need to be it helps to have people kind of excited But I don't think you I think you said that and then just went and did it I don't think you were like on every podcast talking about your vision. No, but here's the other thing I'm saying it's like the number one thing that I've been most successful at I had zero vision for that's this Yeah, zero vision when people like did you anticipate it was ever gonna be the way it is Like no no no never thought about it never dreamed never tried Wasn't just kept doing it. That's it some of it too is just like

Consistency and right place right time. There's a lot of those things. That's why like I should believe in fate I really should and you don't I don't what do you believe in? I don't know. I'm not sure I'm not sure if it's there's like I don't know what it is I don't I don't think it's as simple as fate because I don't think it's truly determined. I think there's possibilities and these possibilities they open up and Your energy and your thoughts sort of synchronize with these possibilities and that's what excites you and it expands and then you follow up on your your instincts and your like you like what's

the the correct way to approach this and then you put more energy and more intensity into it and then it all accelerates and other people sort of join in and you collect like-minded people that also have their thoughts and their energy and they push towards this thing and when you're doing it right good things happen and that's what I think it is and so I should think it's fate but I also think it's a it's not a manipulation of the right word it's a, it's not a manipulation, not the right word, it's a synchronization with your, whoever you really are, like whatever your real thoughts are, whatever your real intention is, what you're trying to do.

I get that. It's like this synchronation with all of it, as much as it is like a vision of like, we're gonna have the best comedy club in the world like We didn't really think that now we thought we were going to just open up a club and let's hope it works Yeah, my goal was like let's not go broke right? I don't want to lose any money. That's all my goal was No, it's really like stated like we talk about it like I'm not trying to make money I'm 100% trying to not lose money and that's it Yeah, and everything else is gravy and then set it up right for the comedians

So the most important thing is to look if I care about comedy, which I clearly do Let's set up the best possible environment for comedy to thrive. Yeah, and it'd be great for everybody Yeah, I remember like I I I understand that I feel like so much of it is like getting out of your own way too. When I first started comedy, I would get these opportunities that I would say no to because I told myself I wasn't ready, et cetera, et cetera.

And this time I'm like, I'm just saying yes, I'm gonna say yes. And not get out of here and just say yes. Like yes, thank you. And Colin Quinn asked me to open for him and I was like Like yes, thank you. And Colin asked me, Colin Quinn asked me to open for him and I was like, yes, thank you. And I was terrified and I was like, I have such bad stage fright as it is,

just ever since I got sober, it's something I deal with. Cause I used to be drunk all the time and I didn't know until I got sober. So you get drunk on stage? I would be drunk before I even got up, but I got sober and was like, fuck, I have stage fright. And it's so bad, Joe, it's so bad that I'll be like, maybe my dog will die.

Maybe there will be, like when the planes were all getting grounded, I'm like, maybe Colin was stuck in New York, like, terrified. So you were trying to avoid the show. And I have to just put that aside, put it all aside. I truly just had to like, I pray get turn it over and it's like it's not about me It's about just like getting out of my way. My job is to like it's It's so an antenna and it's so just like these people want to have fun. Yeah, and and someone sent me the clip of

Because I think my like audience knew I was nervous. I didn't announce it or anything, but I did in my little subscriber community. And someone sent me the clip of you and Sam talking about stand up and how you still got nervous. You were saying I stretch and breathe and I, but Sam said he has a tattoo, this is fun. And I was like, I wrote it on my set list. and breathe and I, but Sam said he has a tattoo this is fun.

Yeah. And I was like, I wrote it on my set list. I'm like, it fucking saved me. Like it was like two days before. I'm like, I'm just gonna. Have fun. Have fun. Yeah.

And I had so much fun. Like you can see it on my face in the pictures. I love them. And Troy was there and it was like, I had so much fun. It makes sense to have stage fright. If you used to get drunk all it was like But it makes sense to have stage fright if you used to get drunk all the time It also makes sense to have stage fright if you haven't done a lot of comedy So yeah, it was a long time before you did comedy again. Like how much time did you take off? I mean for three years three years. Yeah, it's a long time. Okay, baby. Yeah long time

Yeah, but then I did I have been grinding again just quietly working towards you know more and more and more and and it's it's like It's been Ten months, you know, so it was like not like I just got back and was like, alright Yes, if that was the case, I would have said no and was like, all right, yes. If that was the case, I would have said no. You know, I have too much respect for you and Adam

and all of these other comedians, every other comedian that I know. To not be ready. Yeah. To know that like, okay, I can probably handle this. Well, you know, even like Chris Rock, like one of the all time greats, he took years off. Yeah.

And then when he came back, he had to kind of find his thing. I mean, I'm a different person. So I also had to write completely all-new material. It wasn't like I could just rely on old stuff. It doesn't even connect. I've moved. I'm a married woman.

Can't be like, back when I was giving blow jobs. Yeah, so it's been. And it's very humbling to it. It was giving blow jobs. Yeah, so it's been, and it's very humbling to, it was weird too, I can see why people who do it, take a break, start doing something else, get a name doing something else, and then come back to comedy, it's like, I'm a beginner, I feel like a beginner.

And not beginner, I know what I do wrong. The difference is I know when I'm doing something wrong, I know what I'm doing wrong. Well, we used to always see that at the Comedy Store. We used to always see people like sitcom stars who would come in and they were like, I'm going to try to start doing comedy again. And they'd get stacked in there against a bunch of assassins.

And it would be rough. Like Kramer, Michael Richardson, he was doing that. Like after Seinfeld, he went a little crazy. I think, no, no, no,, he was doing that. After Seinfeld, he went a little crazy. I think, now, now, now, now, now. I think that had something to do with that. But he was at the comic store and it was weird, because he would go on after real comics.

And then he would be falling around on stage and it was improvised and it wasn't really, it wasn't, it's not 1978 anymore. No, no, and it's like. The world's a different place, man. Yeah, and just having like, that's the, again, it was just like a ego, like having to put aside like, okay, like whatever.

But also. I'll take three minutes, I'll take five minutes, I'll take, I'll drive however, like that beginner's mind was so necessary and and even like opening for killers like land out just being able to like Have you know it's a confidence thing too you have to just like get hit with that over and over and over again Yeah, you have to do the numbers. Yeah, you have to get back in shape again If you haven't ran in five years, you can't run a marathon. You have to start doing runs around the block.

And I love it. It's been so, yeah, I love it. I was like, fuck. What's a fun time for comedy too, because the world's on fire? Yeah, well, that's great. There's so much crazy shit. And that's the thing, I did it because it's the only time

I feel sane. I mean, I feel sane a lot, but when I get on stage and I'm talking, it's like my mind is like zen. There's just a calm, you know? That's interesting. I feel very present in that like conversation you're having. It's just, I don't know, there's nothing.

Yeah, I think it's just, I think I fought it for a long time. Like I just didn't, I was like, I don't know, there's nothing. Yeah, I think it's just, I think I fought it for a long time. Like I just didn't, I was like, I don't have what it takes. I don't have the chops. I don't have the talent. All this shit, but it's like, just get it out. It's garbage. It's a hard thing to do. You know, people don't like hard things. They'll come up with reasons why they don't do hard things. It's funny, Francis Nganu, who's a former UFC heavyweight champion, he was talking about people going to school because they're trying to avoid a job.

The way he said it, it was like, sometimes they're just avoiding working until they're staying in school. You're getting your second PhD. It's exactly what it is. It's true. And you're still doing something, but you are avoiding. And those are the people that wind up teaching, which is even crazier because they've never really experienced the real world. They're shaping young people to prepare them for the

real world. It's going to be really interesting to see what happens if Trump gets into office, how much gets changed, how much the society shifts, because it does seem like society is shifting away from all the woke stuff and the left wing. And even people that were like former lifelong Democrats, like Bill Ackman and all these people that are talking about voting for Trump, Elon, all these people that are talking about like this, what we have to fight against. But then they're going to realize like the right wing, they're trying to track your periods Well and try to bring Jesus back into the schools I've learned from being very wrong on this podcast many times and having the entire world tell me about it. Um that

Like she raised a hundred million dollars in a day Kamala right there's a much of it came from Satan $100 million in a day, come on. Right. How much of it came from Satan? You mean Hillary Clinton? No, it's Satan, Satan. Maybe it is Hillary. Satan, Satan. Like, where's that money coming from?

Allegedly a lot of first time donors. Okay, maybe, maybe. Maybe, maybe people were that dumb. Maybe they never heard her talk. Maybe they don't care. Maybe it's blue no matter who. Last time we were talking I think it was like there's gonna be a red wave and then I was like

That one wasn't true. It's interesting. Well, I underestimated how much the abortion thing would would play into it Yeah, that plays into it a lot But it almost feels like that's all engineered to keep us like at each other's throats like nothing ever resolved like there's one of the things that they were thinking when they were banning abortions was gay marriage was gonna be next. And some people have openly stated that, gay marriage should be next,

and that that's the thing that they do wanna stop next. And I'm like, this seems fake. It seems like if you really care about that, that seems crazy. I think what you care about is consistently keeping people at each other's throats. Right, I wrote this like piece that went crazy viral, it was like trending on Twitter, it was very unexpected about divorce, just coming from divorce. And I was like, hey, divorce sucks, just, and my point was kind of

like even as an adult with a kid, I didn't realize how much of an effect it has even later in life when you have your own kids. Things like my siblings have had to deal with. And people, the reaction was like crazy, but then that kind of counter reaction was from the left. They were like, and this is when they're coming after divorce laws and they're trying to say that you base, like they're trying to get rid of no fault divorce

and they're trying to make it so women need to get approval to get divorced. Is that you saying that they were lumping you into the day? Well, they were saying that I was, I mean, this is like the blue and on stuff where it's like, oh, you're just, they were like, you were paid, how much did the evangelicals pay you to write this piece? I'm like, yes, the evangelicals years ago, I got, my parents got divorced and I became a deep state plant so that I could write this piece to undermine the divorce laws. That's exactly right. I mean, it's like craziness, but this is... But I think a lot of those people aren't even real people. I think a lot of that is bots.

Bots. And a lot of that is, like, does, I mean, you have to really consider that. Oh, I definitely do. Which is why I think it's really foolish for people to engage in any sort of disagreements online I think so much of the conversation is pushed in one way or another by people that aren't even real people Oh, right, I think those bot farms. Yeah, like all the With all the phones. It's not just that They show you that but you don't think our government's doing that. You're out of your fucking mind.

If you don't think that they are online posing as progressives, having these complex sites with AI-generated photos of their family, they are. Every government does it, and the goal is to divide and conquer. The best way to conquer is to keep us at each other's throats. The best way to keep infringing on our rights is to have you agree with this infringement Because this infringement goes against those people that you oppose which are the people on the other team Yeah And that's the dirty dirty dirty trick that people fall for every goddamn time and that's what leads to the downfall of civilizations

How do we get out of it? mushrooms I'll be the only way I don don't know, maybe aliens land. Maybe Donald Trump takes over and everybody starts doing bong hits out of a fucking American eagle flag thing. What's it called, freedom bong? A freedom bong?

Yeah. I'll vote for whoever stops those freaking wind farms off the coast. That's my, that's my. The wind thing's nuts. They should have gone down the road of nuclear power plants a long fucking time ago The thing is people are afraid of them because of Chernobyl and Three Mile Island and they're not like that anymore They're not only they're not like that anymore. It is literally the greenest source of energy that we have

They know how to shut them down now. There's ways to avoid it There's even companies that are investing in making batteries out of the waste to avoid it. There's even companies that are investing in making batteries out of the waste. Did you see all this stuff like with Nantucket? The beaches were all closed because one of the turbines fell and then the beach was like getting fiberglass and there's dead whales on Black Island and all up and down. I'm like this is a- What are the dead whales from? From the fucking wind from, Schellenberger covers all this. He taught, he's been doing a whole documentary. It's because it's fucking with all their They're like so sonar stuff and it gives off this vibration and it is an equal like these are the fucking save the whales people And they're kid this is killing the whales and it like you know the whales with the sound

Oh, it's an ecological disaster these things. They should not be allowed. They should be shut down I don't know how they even got through and it's just, it is. They don't even generate that much electricity. One percent. I was watching all the hearings in Nantucket because they never got to vote on it either. This is another one of those things that just like people were like, yeah, we need tax cuts and for our company it's GE and I think it was GE. And so they were like, this is one percent of it.

It generates like one% extra energy for us It's nothing there was a boat that got attacked by a whale today a Boat that got flipped over by a whale an actual whale flipped over a boat like yeah blue whale or an orca I don't know what kind of whale but a big-ass whale a whale whale What happens see a whale capsizes a boat off the coast of Rye, New Hampshire Tuesday. Watch that again, because it's crazy. This whale just jumps up and smashes this boat

and flips it over and that guy falls in the water and this kid's like, let me get the fuck out of here. Like I don't know what happened and why the whales are attacking boats. Is that saying Yellowstone's biscuit basin erupts? Excuse me? See the explore.stone's biscuit basin erupts? Excuse me? See the explore. Biscuit basin erupts.

Is Yellowstone fucking blasting? Oh yeah, that's great, that's next. Yellowstone's gonna blow. Supervolcano, whales are attacking people. Let's wrap this up. All right. I love you, you're awesome. I love you too.

It's great to see you always, I'm glad you're enjoying it here. I love it, love you and thank you. Tell everybody your podcast where they can get dumpster fire. Just go to fetishy.com It's all there. We just took it all phetasy.com or and subscribe to our YouTube Bridget Phetasy. That would be the best thing you can do All right Alright, bye everybody. Bye!