The Joe Rogan Experience - #2396 - Andrew Schulz

Episode Date: October 18, 2025

Andrew Schulz is a stand-up comic, actor, and podcaster. He's the host of the "Flagrant" podcast with Akaash Singh, and the "Brilliant Idiots" podcast with Charlamagne Tha God.www.theandrewschulz.comhttps://www.youtube.com/theandrewschulz Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Joe Rogan podcast checking out The Joe Rogan Experience Train by day, Joe Rogan podcast by night All day I've probably going to play something for you You've been getting into AI music at all? Music, a little, a little, a little. Listen to this.

Yeah. They're taking 50-cent songs I knew you were going to, that I heard. You've heard many men, right? Yeah, it's incredible. Have you heard what-up gangster? No, no, let me do it. No, you haven't. The many men one is fantastic. The many men's amazing.

Hold up, hold up. Hold up. Hold on. Hold on. Oh, my bad. My bad. What's this? You got to hear this.

You got to hear this. What a blood? What? What I'm cousin? What? What a blood? Wait till you hear this flow. Here we go

Here we go I'm not I'm not the type of I'm not the type of bed sitting tight on my chest I'm the type of stuff you connect when the coke price climb up you're going to connect when the coke price climbs Gangsters for my cuts Yeah, they know me

I grew up around Nick's that weren't really homies son of Jesus stash it was The Maca blasted D's come through We dump diesel Go

Go Go! This is fantastic. So good. How much of this is, like, one prompt, or is there, like, a guy working with... Jamie's the answer to that, because Jamie's done a bunch of them. Yeah. Yeah, like, how much of this is, like, actually editing and somebody who understands producing music, like, constantly prompt it?

No. Prompt five words. Holy shit. Say 1950s soul music. It's so easy. And it put in the lyrics. You want a cigar. Let's burn a cigar.

Let's burn one down, man. Oh, man. 50. 50's a man. Let's be toxic rich dudes. Yes, let's do it. When are we started? Have we started?

Yeah, we're rolling. We're rolling. Are these your personal ones? No, these are from foundation cigars. These are, I don't know what they're called, but these are fucking legit. my man what happened to yours i still have those those are nice oh those are great yeah we got a nice little box right here i just opened this box the other day there nice foundation where are these from uh probably nicaragua i think that's where he's got his thing hey i got him what's the rules on

that about nicaragua no oh oh that's okay yeah It's like a man taking you shopping. You're 50 saying that about to me. Why are you going to take me shopping for? And then he looked at Meek Mills Post and they were wearing the same shirt. And with Diddy and Meek were wearing the same shirt, he's like, see, that's why I don't let him take me shop. 50's so funny. But you realize how good his lyrics are when you can't run through AI.

Like you revisit the lyrics. Like the many men lyrics are fantastic. Yeah. Man's song, it almost works better. Right? It's like a, what is that? Like 50s? Soul.

Soul. Yeah. Well, if that dude was a real dude, he would be the biggest fucking artist on earth right now. If that was his song, if it wasn't written by 50, it was his song, and he put it out right now, everybody would be like, oh, my God. Who the fuck is this guy? Yeah.

He just picture him looking like, just perfect, like, Cat Williams type suit on stage, you know, just going off. sweating, wiping his head with a towel, full blast. Yeah, just like Southern Deacon. Fucking 9,000 RPMs. Bha, what up, blood. I just love the idea of like you working out to 50 soul, 50 cents. Oh, I do.

Yeah, I do all the time. Yeah, yeah, working in there with Wu Tang. With Wu Tang's my favorite workout music. Yeah, Big Daddy Kane. Yeah, you like all that. Eric B and Rakim. Yeah, Kooji rap. Have you ever talked?

to, do you ever listen to EPMD? Oh, fuck yeah. You ever talk to like Eric Serman? No, never have. No, never have. Yeah. I love those guys. I can't believe you in 50 have never connected it. Like I know everybody... I met him once. I interviewed him from UFC long time ago. Where?

I don't remember. It might have been Vegas. It was a UFC event in Vegas and he was there. I don't know if he was releasing something or whatever it was. I sat next to him and... That shit is harsh. It's good, right? That's a good one, but that's a strong one. That's a Maduro. Yeah. Yeah. I like them robust.

I bet. Yeah. I'm glad I lit my own. Okay, wait. So wait, you met him? You were at the UFC fight and you spoke to him. There was a UFC event. This is how long ago?

A long time ago, man. I had hair. So it had to be pretty... There it is right there. Oh, so this is like when he's in the middle of his stuff with... Oh, I mean, I got to say this is probably 2007 or something like that. But he was always involved with something. He was always beefing with somebody.

Yeah, that was the funny thing, because when we were in, uh, he's in that street fighter movie, so when we were in Australia filming, like, I saw the guys with him. And like, I recognized like a couple, like, it was a security, but they didn't look like, like, like, one guy looked like actual professional security. And I was like, I was like, oh, that's, that's, that guy looks like that's his real job being security, not what I'm used to seeing 50 with. Right. And, uh, he goes, yeah, man, can't get in the country with felonies, bro.

I had to bring the clean ones. So, like, the real people that he has around. Wow. You've got to bring clean security. Clean security. Professionals. There's different levels of professionals. Yeah.

Well, there's people that know things. Yeah. Sometimes you go to, like, a city or state, and you need to know those things. Yeah, you need to know things. Some people need to know things. Sometimes you've got to check in with folks, too. That's the thing. Your guys are the best of it.

Your guys hit me up. They were like, yeah, there's some crazy chick online. She says she wants to kill you. so just don't go to New Mexico. And I was like, all right, bet, I won't do that. They're like, she said she wanted to kill somebody else. I don't even say their names. I don't want to give him any heat.

But, like, yeah, as long as you don't go to New Mexico, it should be good. I'm like, no plans. Allegedly. Yeah. Yeah, it's wild times. Wild times. Mm-hmm.

Wild times when people celebrate people getting killed now. Like, that never happened before. Like, even when someone bad got killed before, you're like, oh, wow, that's kind of crazy. I've been thinking a lot about this. Yeah. And I think that, like, I don't think we all exist in the same reality anymore. Not on some multiverse shit, but, like, just, like, how we see the world. Yes.

Yes. And it's, like, especially with Charlie's death, because I was in Australia when it happened, so, like, I had time. Like, I wasn't doing pods. I wasn't doing stand-up. I'm just, like, sitting around in a trailer all to this movie. So, like, started watching, like, a bunch of his stuff. Also, I want to say he did something really cool. Like, I didn't really know him, but, like, you'd DM a couple times, but he saw a headline

about me once, and he DM me. And, like, I don't even have a relationship with this guy. He goes, this headline looks a little weird. Like, I know we don't really know each other, but, like, is this what you meant? And, like, there are people who I know that I've considered colleagues that haven't even afforded that to me. Yeah. They just ran with a headline and, like, made a video, got clicks, views, or whatever like that. Right.

This guy, I don't even know, hits me up and goes, is this what you meant? Yeah. Very cool. I met him once at a gun range. Oh, really? Yeah. I met him at Taryn Tactical. So I was down there training.

You know, do you know what Terran fact was? This is the one where you see, like, a lot of, like, uh, celebs. The one where you see celebs. He trained Keanu Reeves for John Wick. He's the man. Like, Terran Butler is like a multiple time world champion shooter of those, you know, the events that they have where it's timed or a shooter ready. Yeah.

Um, so I met him there. It seemed like a real nice guy. You know, I didn't know anything about him back then. I didn't know much about his beliefs and views that were controversial. Versial until after he got killed and then people started sending me stuff and I was like okay What's the context of this? Yeah, he shouldn't have said it that way. There were there was some ones that we've talked about before One specifically, you know, but it look the fucking guy first of all was 31 years old Yeah, right when I was 31. Thank God there wasn't like Twitter or especially when I was 21. Oh my God. Thank God. Yeah, thank God. You know, judge

I'm watching, like, that's not like that Nick Fuentes kid. He's like 26, like, thank God. It didn't exist when I was fucking 21. Dude, yeah. I was a fucking moron. I was a complete moron, like most people, especially if you grow up around morons. But I think he said a few things that if I was his friend,

I would say, don't say it like that. I know what you're trying to say. But don't ever say when I go into a cockpit, I hope that the pilot, if he's black, is qualified. I know what you're trying to say. You shouldn't hire underqualified pilots. Yeah. But saying it like that...

Just because of the color of their skins. He's probably not hanging out with black people, not knowing how offensive that's going to be for them, how you got to go. That's not what I meant. Like, you got to, that's not what I meant before you say it. Yeah. You got to run it through the filter, like, what am I trying to say? Yeah.

We all don't want unqualified people to do dangerous fucking jobs, period. It doesn't matter what race they are. If all of a sudden white people became a minority and they had to start hiring dopey whites, You'd be upset. And he makes that argument a lot. Like, he makes it with sports. You know, he's like, all right, if the NFL is going to be 50% black and, you know. Right, right, right.

So, but again, like, the context is taken out. Yes. And I think that's what happened. Like, the algorithm flattens all of us into a two-dimensional person. And, like, only the views that tap into, you know, your biggest insecurities, your biggest fears. Not the views. Only, like, the lines we say or the videos, whatever, that tap into those things. Or what terrible things you want confirm.

Exactly, exactly. Things you won't confirm. Like, that's what the algorithm does. And, like, I realized that when I was doing, like, a promo tour for life, my last special, right? I would go on a couple pods that, like, and, like, maybe, like, 10, 15, 20 minutes into the conversation, I would realize, like, oh, wow, they have a very different view of me than me. The New York Times one. No, well, the New York Times one, I was, like, expecting it for sure. But even when I went on Dax's podcast, Dax knew me.

but his co-host, I was like, oh, she has an idea of me that's, like, cultivated by the internet and headlines. Cartoonish. Exactly. And it's just a flattened version, right? It's like, there's really no humanity in it. It's just these are the things that people are saying that I'm saying with no context.

Right. And then you just create an archetype. And, like, I think in a lot of ways that's the Charlie thing to the furthest extreme, right? It's just like, if you're on the right, there's one version of Charlie. If you're on the left, there's another version of Charlie. Right.

And when he died, this person that you saw as like a good, God-fearing man, you're, like, heartbroken by it. And then on the left, this person you saw that was, like, bigoted or hateful, you're like, okay, I'm not really heartbroken by it. Some people are even crazy enough to be like, he deserved it or this is what you get, right? But they can only have that feeling

if he's completely dehumanized the version of him that they see all the time. That happens to you. It happens to me. It happens to, like, anybody who's on the internet talking, you know, for a few hours a week. And when I saw that shit, and especially I saw like that, this visceral reaction to Charlie, that's what so's the insanity in the country because the people on the left are seeing the people on the right be heartbroken, but they're like, why are you heartbroken over this guy who's a bigot? And the people on the right are saying the people on the left celebrating, they're like, why are you celebrating the death this God-fearing family man?

And both sides just think each other is absolutely insane. Yeah. When in reality, he's neither of those cartoons. Right. Right? Yeah. So, yeah, it was just, the life thing, when I was talking to those people, I was like, you know, 20 or 30 minutes in the conversation, they're like, oh, wow, like, yeah, you're not kind of who I thought you were. Right.

I'm like, yeah, because you let people, you let people tell you who I was in 30-second clips. Yeah. It's not like I have four hours of podcasting every single week that you can indulge in to figure it out. What do they try to label you as? Like, what is the, what's the angle they take on you? Is it you're heterosexual. Oh, you're heterosexual. And I hate it.

Heterosexual is a real problem in this day and age. Yeah, no, no, it's a, yeah, I think that like... Manosphere, podcast bros. I think there's like Roganverse, like, Manosphere, like... And I think that this is kind of a new iteration post-election. So I think what a lot of people are struggling with the fact is, they're trying to, like, find a way that the Democrats lost the election without taking any accountability for, like, what they were doing. Right. So it's like, oh, because he went on Rogan and Schultz and Theo's podcast.

That's the reason why he won. It's like, no, they kind of ran a dead guy that was very unpopular, and then they ran a woman that can't really talk that well in front of the camera. And they have an open border for four years that freaked everybody out. Sure, sure, but like in New York, people aren't really worried about the open border.

Oh, they were. You don't think they were? I talked to a lot of people in New York. They were upset about the migrants that had been shipped there, that they were putting it up in the Roosevelt Hotel and how crazy that was. The mind crisis, for sure, like, New York, I think, like, affected people.

I'm not saying it didn't. But like, I don't think that there. they attach it to the border. I think they're more just like, well, just don't send them here. You know what I mean? Like, you know, just keep them down there or whatever. Like, you guys chose to live near the border.

Do you remember when they sent them to Martha's Vineyard? Oh, yeah. They sent them to Martha's Vineyard. Like, get, yeah, get the fuck out of here. They moved about so quick. Martha's Vineyard is all liberals, bro. It's all super rich Mercedes driving limo people. It's the NIMBY.

What is it called? Not in my backyard. Exactly. Right? That's like there. And there's a, you know, Ezra Klein, do you know, Ezra? And like, Ezra did a great piece. And it's so funny because, like, he's trying to be reasonable right now.

He's, like, trying to have. And they're calling them a right way. And I keep hitting them up. And I'm like, bro, you're doing the right thing when there are groups that, like, hate you because you're actually trying to, like, win an election. You're trying to be reasonable. He had this whole thing about, like, hey, the reason why they can build a lot of buildings in Texas and why we can't in Los Angeles is because they're restrictive laws.

And people are like, this guy's an animal. And I was just like, all right, buddy. I don't know what to do. So I understand that frustration. Shit, I've felt it a million different times. Like you try to be nuanced and reasonable. There's really no place on the internet for it. Because why would the algorithm reward anything nuanced and reasonable?

That's not entertaining. I want to see Nick Fuentes talk shit. Right. Do you know what I don't want to see like a thoughtful take from some like TV host? You want Sam Hyde. I'm get wild, Sam. Yeah, get wild. Now, does it mean that I agree with these things?

No. No, but the algorithm doesn't know what you agree with or not. They just know what you click on, share. It's part of the fun of the internet in general is that it's not regulated. So when wild people break through and everybody goes, Bro, what was the first thing we did with SORA? You got MLK giving a speech and a Down syndrome kid walks up and goes peanut butter. Right, right.

Well, how about those video? where they had like Trump playing in a band and like there was a like Clinton was on the saxophone did you ever see those no oh my god but like this incredible we're gonna make they're playing credence clear rata revival together i mean i still like it when the down syndrome kid comes up and it just says paid it's all good it's guilt free because he's not a real person right he's made up right right right right okay you can laugh at him we can laugh because it's not a real person right but uh that brings to like what about a i down syndrome porn the sounds would be crazy I mean, we gotta see it just for the sounds

Right? Did they just announce That was Is Open AI doing an erotica version? Peanut butter No, yeah, they said they wouldn't censor it They're like, it's not our job to be the moral police Oh, well then it's over

Then it's Andrew Schultz porn all day long So that's a crazy thing Can they do, hey, bro You handsome devil? Hey, the mustache? Isn't it isn't moral police of the world after erotica chat GPT post blows up. So that's the thing.

Can you do it? Can you make porn with us? Or can you just make it with like random? 100% can't with you. What about you? We can't make form of you. Me too. I just want you to feel it.

He hit me with the Spider-Man me and me. You make porn with you. Do it. Get them. Well, it's going to be a real problem with female celebrities. It already has been a problem. They face-swapped Natalie Portman onto porn star's bodies. Remember they were doing we were kids with Photoshop.

The second Photoshop came out. Yep, yep, yep. There was, like, tons of porn. Who's the lady that ran for president from Alaska? Oh, Sarah Palin. Yeah, Sarah Palin was like every single porn video. Yeah. So, yeah, why would they not do it?

They're doing it 100%. Well, the real thing, you know... We won't be upset as long as, like, we're throwing it down. Like, we'll be upset if, like, our wives are in it. Right, that would be an issue. But if somebody makes a porn where I got, like, a huge cock and I'm just fucking shit up. But the problem is it's going to be your wife getting teamed on. It won't even be like...

Why are we putting these things out there in the world? Why you keep giving them ideas? The Internet is a dangerous place, and it always ends up with me getting fucked. Yeah, the world's dark right now with this, because there's no rules and people are just, it's sort of like if you gave the world matches for the first time. And they're like, I could just start a fire. Do you think they did that initially when they create a fire? They're like, we need some rules for this shit. We just can't let everybody.

For sure, should. I mean, I thought about that before. Was that like the original gun control? How weird is it that I don't even have to have a license to have one of the most powerful forces in the world with the palm of my hand? And I could be six. Okay. Imagine after the Chicago fire, right? Like 80% of the city is decimated.

I don't even know what year that is. Probably 1800s or something like that. Did they say, hmm, maybe we're going to take matches away from these motherfuckers. Or like fireplaces or something. Right. I bet they didn't let you build a house out of wood anymore. All that's made out of woods. Yeah, but we need concrete or something.

No, that's not why they did that. that. Why'd they do it? Probably for structural rigidity and like from the cold it's better if you have like I would imagine there's a bunch of reasons to make something out of brick.

It's more, it's hard to get into. It won't light on fire. Concrete is, I mean they're making by the way, they probably should do this a long time ago but they're making fireproof houses now in like Malibu and places like that, rich people. Yeah. You would imagine like if you're

living in a place that like once the fire hits no one's stopping shit so you know they just busted somebody for that i know i saw that like the person who started the fire yeah it wasn't in palisades it was like the one that connected to it or something like that something like that but this dude was like really into fires like he he had a bunch of chat gpt prompts about fires and that's an interesting autism right there it's a weird one man you could have had trains or dinosaurs but you got fires bro there was one guy where they arrested. He had a fake fire truck, and he was at the Palisades fire.

He was a convicted arsonist. How much Tyler and all your mom take that you end up wanted a fake fire truck? He bought a fire truck. Oh, so a real fire truck. Yeah, he bought a fire truck, painted the logo on it, whatever, and then drove it to the Palisades where the fires were. Oh, and they started the fires, but nobody suspected it. They don't know if he started fires.

They don't know, but they do know that this arsonist was at the fires with a fire truck. And they're like, you're not a fireman, dude. In fact, you're the opposite of a fireman. That's the thing. That's why it's kind of, it's like a brilliant disguise. Yeah. Well, in the middle of the chaos, you know, Huberman filmed a bunch of guys lighting fires.

He said it was nuts. He said there was like teams of people running around starting fires while the fires are going on. Yeah. He said he watched people do it. People were screaming at him and honking their horn. They arrested people that were doing it. So once chaos breaks, it's like,

They did a study a while back where they parked a car on the campus of Stanford, and they parked a car, I think it was in the Bronx. The car in the Bronx got stripped immediately. They had families coming in and taking the battery and, like, openly. They had cameras on it. The car in Stanford didn't get fucked with at all. They left it alone until someone broke. They said, let's just mix this up and break one of the windows. So they smashed the window

And then within a day It was like stripped apart Yeah The guy that was going in They caught him at a checkpoint But I think they're alluding That he was probably going to go try to Rob the houses

Because it's a bunch of tools That they say were using burglary Interesting Well he's probably trying to do that too I mean he's a piece of shit But wasn't he already An arsonist before this? Yeah he's just an all around piece of shit

It's not like hey I'm an arsonist But I'm not a fucking thief I wouldn't steal jewelry Come on I saw people just running out of people's houses with TVs like people were filming it from the street Yeah Just break it in kicking the door in

Just running in teams that people would mask on Yeah Yeah robin somebody's personal home feels different I mean it's fucked up to just break into a Kmart Or any of those things like But you see how like Oh it's way different You could get caught up in like a

I don't know I don't call it the excitement But like you know You're a little fucking kid and something's going down. You're like, all right, let's get after it. Yeah. But, like, bringing into somebody's home is a little. It's horrible.

Yeah. It's evil. Yeah, because there's, like, a person behind it, whereas, like, Kmart is, like, this corporation. Also, they're always going to know you were in their home. Like, for rest of their life. Yeah. They live with that trauma.

Well, as long as they're back in that house, they're going to know that when the fires broke out, you kicked in their front door and ransacked their house, and now they're sitting in it. If their house didn't burn down, now they're sitting in the house. The house probably burned down. Yeah. Which is, I guess, their logic is, like,

in there now otherwise there's going to be a puddle of shit on the ground instead of a Rolex let's go get it yeah you know yeah it's crazy how like the fires weren't even that long ago I know it wasn't that long ago and they but they haven't even touched a house Adam Carolla just did a video about it what do you say he first of all he called it Corolla called it a long time ago because Corolla's been involved in construction his whole life right so he knows how hard it is to get permits to build in the Palisades it's like no one is going to rebuild this is but they haven't even touched it.

Yeah, but I think they just said that they're going to start, like, stripping back some of that legislation. Exactly. They're going to start putting low-income housing up there. This is what happened with, I think it was in, like, I think it was in Philadelphia, right? I think it was, there was like a bridge that collapsed. You remember this? Was this in Philly, Pennsylvania?

And I think the governor was like, okay, we have to rebuild this because obviously there's going to be, like, huge traffic situations. Like, we just need this thing. This is just how humans are going to kind of get around. And so they stripped all legislation, and they were able to put it up in a matter of weeks, if I'm not mistaken. Jamie, you know what I'm talking about? Yeah. I know what you're talking about.

I remember that story. And they're like, how long would this take if we didn't strip all the legislation? They're like 16 to 18 months. So you did in three weeks compared to 16 and 18 months. And I think this is where people get, like, frustrated with all the bureaucracy and the red tape. Now, I also believe in some red tape. Like, I live in New York City. There's somebody renovating above us right now.

I got a kid. You know what I mean? So it's like I would like a little red tape to make sure they're just not hammering 24 hours a day. Right. We live on top of each other. You live in Texas. There's probably, you don't even see your neighbor. You could have a little less red tape.

Right. But then we get to a point in New York where it's like, okay, is it impossible to renovate ever? Maybe that's too much. But there needs to be some in different situations. 100%. I completely agree. I got in a conversation about that a long time ago with Dave Rubin. where we were talking about regulations for construction sites

that you don't you don't need inspectors and I was like oh my god yeah that's the bro they'll put they'll put the cancer in the kids cereal yeah they don't give a fuck like if you don't regulate the food they'll put anything in it well that's so you need to have somebody looking after it's in it right now this is this RFK junior shit where they're turning him into a quack and these companies are gonna go under if they have to follow these regulations they're following them already in Canada exactly it's like it's like Same factory

Same fruit loops And now we gotta feel bad for Kellogg's Right We're like oh my god They're not gonna make it Poor Kellogg's Didn't Newsom Just veto a bill

That would stop forever chemicals There was a bill that was stopped Forever chemicals being used on I think cooking utensils Like there's certain Like non-stick cookware That has forever chemicals on it You're scraping it with like a metal spatula

It'll probably get in your diet Not good I think they were banning it Why would he do that? He vetoed a California bill banning cookware with PFAS's forever chemicals. He says the bill would cause sudden product shift sparking debate among chefs, lawmakers, and environmentalists. No, no, the bill stops poison, bro. The bill stops poison for going into human bodies.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. You profit monster. Yeah, did you? You fucking profit monster. Did you see, there's a guy named Van Lathan was asking him about eight people. Pack, did you see this? He just says something... Interesting.

Yeah, yeah. It's just so interesting. I mean, it's not something I... I don't think about it. I don't... It's just interesting. It's interesting. I'm interested.

I'm interesting. Now I'm interested. Now I'm interested. Yeah, when is he coming on? He's talking some shit on Twitter. I know. It's like you think that's going to work? Like, that's so stupid.

Like, this is such a bad look. It's such a bad choice. There's a little desperation in it. But it's just stupid. It's like, this is a bad strategy. Like, I probably would have had him on. Yeah. But now I'm like, no, what are you doing?

There is a fun version where you just do it and cook him, you know? He'll cook himself. I mean, that seems to be already happening. All you have to do is just ask him questions. Yeah, it's like, why are people leaving? Why do you say this thing all the time where you rattle off all the good things about California? When anybody says something bad about California, it's like, number one in Fortune 500 companies, number one in higher education, number one. It was all that shit before you were there.

It was all that shit forever. It's because the weather's perfect, man. It has nothing to do with you. California is an unbelievable state. This is just what we have to call. It's like the place in the oceans, two hours apart. It's unbelievable. Yeah, it's nuts.

It's probably in terms of like one place, if you had to live in one state for the rest of your life, one state for the rest of your life, you could never move. And that was the only place you could live. It's California. It's like not even a question. Yeah, it's perfect. If you want snow, you can have snow. If you want to be in San Diego and the beach all day, you have the San Diego the beach.

You could surf, you could snow, but you could do whatever the fuck you want. You want to be a farmer. Go farm. You got all kinds of parts of San Francisco, all kinds of parts of Oakland, all kinds of parts of, you know, the San Fernando Valley. It's so different. It's like there's so many different ways you can live in California. But they're fucking problems and people are leaving.

Like, if people are leaving the place you're in charge of, don't be upset if people are critical of how you've been managing it. Yeah. Like Hollywood, I've been talking to, like, people who are making films. Like, the producers are films, not like the actors, right? Like, the actual people who are putting the money up to make films, right? Because they'll give you the real. Right.

Like, we're filming in Australia. I'm like, guys, why the fuck are we filming in Australia? Like, Australia is nice, but why the fuck are we here? And they're like, you can't make a movie in Hollywood. I go, what do you mean you can't make? They go, you can't. I go, where was Hollywood on the list of places we could film? I'll give me the number.

And they're like, not even top 10. Not even top 10. Wow. It was Australia you get 60% off in taxes or something like that. 60. 60. We're talking about if you're making like a $10 million rom-com, that's one thing. If you're making a $100 million, $200 million film, 60% off in taxes.

Yeah. So something's happened at L.A. And it's fucked up because I look at L.A. kind of like a college football town, but college football is the film industry. And it's like if you don't nurture that, I'm not worried about the actors. It's like there's a guys who do the lighting. They do transpo.

These are guys who are like, they're like working class guys. They made good money. Don't get me wrong. That goes away. The crew that came out to film, like a lot of the crew that came out to film in Australia was from L.A.

And a lot of them have moved out of L.A. They moved to like San Diego. Like my boy Nick was AD. He's like, yeah, there's just no work in L.A. right now. So we'll travel for the job. And then I just live the rest of my time in San Diego. That's a problem. Netflix just built this like billion dollar fucking

studio in Jersey. Did you see this? No. So like they're going to start taking production over there. I'm just saying like you have the industry that everybody knows Los Angeles for. What other thing do we know L.A. for? That's it. It's being famous. Music, movies. Yeah. It's all L.A. That's all L.A. is. I don't even know what music is coming out of there anymore. Like when we were kids, you think about like what those iconic like rock and roll venues. Right. Well, it's also a town of lost children, right? Like One of the problems with L.A. is, like, if you wanted to talk about a town that doesn't have, like, an emotional base that's healthy, like, the main motivation of a good percentage of the people that came out there is to just to get attention to make up for a shitty childhood. Like, that's the main, the main population. L.A. is attention to make up for a shitty childhood. New York is money to make up for a shitty childhood.

Yes! That's really what it is. Yes. It's like New York is the hedge funds of the banks because it's like, okay, my dad wasn't around, my mom hated me, but I'm going to make a billion dollars. Yeah, my mom was on pills and barely there and, you know. I've developed enough sociopath. Dad's a sociopath.

I could be this fucking hedge fund guy that's going to take over the world. That's what they believe. And then L.A. is the same thing, but it's just pads in the back. I want people to love me. Yeah, it's both two different versions of American Psycho. Yeah. I'm trying to wonder, like, which. one is worse.

New York is better because at least they have more information. They have more things they can talk to you about. What I say, yeah, what I always say about New York is like, we still appreciate greatness even if you're not, even if you're not wealthy. So like the best skateboarder

is really cool in New York. Yeah. The best street artist is really cool. Right, right, right. Whereas I think L.A. Because it's built around the entertainment industry, it's like whatever's hot. You could have a dog shit movie, but if it's biggest movie you're the guy yeah and because there is that dependence on like star power over there uh-huh where i think is new york is like the kind of dependence is the banks

like the industry doesn't rely so like we get to masquerade as like really enjoying artists right like like you could be a bad motherfucker and be playing in like subway tunnels and people like oh this guy's right and some guys do like make it out of there like that like charlie crockett busking i believe it's called well yeah charlie crockett used to just pull up and charlie You don't know what Charlie Crockett is? Did they do a 50s version of his music? No, no, no, no. That's the only way I know.

No, he does like a 50s version of his music. Oh. He's like a country guy who was a street kid. Oh. Yeah, man. My bad, Charlie? He's a bad motherfucker. My bad, brother.

He's really good, man. I was not familiar with your game. He's got a voice where you're like, oh, this guy's seen some shit. Oh, really? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

His, so he used to. This is fire. He would sing on fucking. and subway cars. He would sing, you know, in the tunnels. Yeah. He would do his shit on street corners. He was, like, homeless for a long time.

Yeah. And now he's killing it. Yeah. Very, very interesting guy. But that's New York, right? He was in New York doing country music outside. Yeah. You can do stuff like that in New York and people like, look at this bad motherfucker. That's the thing.

You do it in L.A., they're like, you fucking loser. You're never going to be Bruce Brinkstein. They don't, whatever it is. They don't care about the best pool player in L.A. No But New York There's like a little bubble that you could exist in Where you're like the king of the fucking castle

It's true L.A has no pool halls And it's just like another version It's like everything is geared around Entertainment and I get it That's it's like if you're the coach of the football team In Ohio State like you're the guy Yeah

But I think it's kind of cool in New York That you have these little bubbles Where you know people really value This niche thing that you do Well New York has strong communities of bubbles The pool thing is a good example Because L.A. at one time Had Hollywood billiards, which was a 24-hour pool hall

That was filled with hustlers It was like a notorious place Like if you were a New York pool player And you were coming to L.A., you went to Hollywood And you went downstairs And there was all these like, you could get a game And you could get a game with some fucking killers Pool Hall is the same, bro.

It's underground A lot of them It's like at least back Robb. That was Chelsea. Chelsea Village was underground too Like some of the big that was in the New York City. 86 was it, I think at one point it was Amsterdam, but it was upstairs. And then there was another one on 86 Street on the east side that was downstairs.

Oh, yeah. The downstairs one's probably shiftier. That was the one that Nikki Schulman, the guy I was telling you about that I went to middle school with, an elementary school. Oh, he would go to that one? We would just go during lunch, and I was like, why is this guy like this place? There was hundreds of pool halls in the 90s when I lived in New York. Hundreds. You'd go to these like 24-hour Chinese joints.

Yeah, yeah. You go in Chinatown. There's killer place. and they could barely speak English. But my point is, L.A. only had one. My boy, this Chinese kid, we called him Cowboy. We went to, he was at our school. I mean, like, the kid had the strongest Chinese accent.

I think he was born in America. It was crazy. It was like, I didn't even understand. I was like, this guy's got to be putting it on. He lived in, like, the Chinese version of, like, the projects in Chinatown, right? And he had a pool table in his apartment. there's no room in the apartment it's the projects right like i'm watching his mom like skirt around the pool table half the shots you came to do but like the obsession was unreal and cowboy was

was legit yeah yeah you need a place to practice in the dark when no one's looking yeah that's the thing about pool players you want to get good when no one's watching so you could sneak up on people oh yeah yeah so they they have this idea how good you play but you play a lot better than that you got to be able to practice in silence yeah but now with the internet you can't hustle anymore. I feel like... No, there's no hustling anymore. There's like maybe a few guys that could pull it off on idiots, but amongst high-level guys, you can... Everybody knows.

All the action is knocked. My point was there's only one place in all of L.A. Right. L.A. had 20 million people. There was one place that was pretty good. Yeah. There was a place in the valley. There was a couple places in, like, when you start going out towards Santa Barbara,

there was a few places, but as far as... as like the volume of New York City it was not even close it was New York, Connecticut New Jersey they were all filled with legendary pool hall we used to play at West End Billiards in New Jersey they had a weekly tournament with like

pros it was in Elizabeth New Jersey super sketchy area super sketchy but you would go there and you'd see Steve Miserac playing Rodney Morris two world class world championship level pool players in this shitty ass fucking weird spot with a diner counter there it was it was it was they were everywhere it's a

cool world the pool world oh it's a great world i remember i was here forget what it was but like you had a guy down here i don't know if he just did the pod but he was like an o g and i think he like commentates maybe now but jeremy jones that's my boy yeah and uh he could hold court like he was He's a funny dude. He's a storyteller. Yeah, he's a funny dude. He was on the podcast, too. He had some great fucking stories.

Yeah, that was cool. And he, that dude won the U.S. Open. The U.S. Open's the pool tournament where it's the U.S. Open, but people come from everywhere. Yeah. Like, people come from all around the world. Taiwan, Germany, all over the place to play in that tournament. That's the big one. And Jeremy won that shit.

He won that shit. That's how good he plays. Hearing his stories about, like, going, like being, like, essentially like a traveling pool hustler and like popping into a town where you heard there was some game and you travel with like a couple other people one guy would like sense it out he would go play a couple games see who's there and then Jeremy would just come in and just clean up

for two weeks straight and then you're out of there yep it is and you play like you suck at first that's right yeah the first week you just let people beat up on you a little bit and then the second week you eat their lunch depends on how thick your bank roll is you know like if you could start off like just you only got like a hundred 50 to lose, you know, like you have your gambling money. Like, what can we fuck with before we start getting into real money?

Because if you want to get somebody on the hook, you don't want to get them on the hook for $100. You want to get them on the hook for $5,000. Hook means you want them to have the confidence that they'll beat you? Well, when they're on the hook is when they're fucked. Right. So you let them win a few games and then you say, let's bet some fucking real money. And, you know, you look nervous and shit. And then you get a game for $5,000.

You're like, okay, here we go. And then you loosen up, then all of a sudden the stroke is smooth. And he's like, what the fuck happened? It's like midway through that game when someone realizes they're being hustled. Oh, they get mad. I've been there. I've been there. Not with me.

I was never good enough to hustle people. But my friend Johnny was a professional pool hustler. My friend Johnny was a homeless guy. Not the guy from Connecticut? No, that's Tommy. Tommy. Tommy was different. Tommy wasn't as crazy as Johnny.

Tommy's clean and sober. He has been, like, he smokes a little weed. but like his whole life he never drank never did drugs right and he was an elite pool player but johnny was the johnny actually used to play at the subways too he used to go down he was a musician so he would he would had a little keyboard and shit that was one of the ways that he made money but he would hustle people that's how i met him he tried to hustle me yeah he just comes over and he starts you know talking like dude you play pretty good you want to play some and i was like what we talking about man did you have the defenses up like right away i knew i can smell a predator

I was like, get the fuck out of here. He only became friends. So he sees it. Do you respect the hustle? 100%. Okay, so within pool, someone trying to hustle you, it's not seen as, it's not seen as like an act of aggression at all. It's just like, this is part of the game. Part of the fun.

Yeah. It's part of the fun. Oh, so you almost appreciate when someone's trying to. 100% because you don't know. Like, is this guy fucking with me? Do you play good? Do you play good? And you don't know.

Did you ever see the movie The Color of Money? There's a scene where Paul Newman and Forrest Whitaker. Forrest Whitaker hustles Paul Newman. And he, at one point in time, Paul Newman goes, are you a hustler? Are you a hustler? Because Paul Newman, in the movie The Hustler, was the guy who did that to other people. He pretended he sucked. And then he would eventually get all their money.

And he goes, and Forrest Whitaker looks at him, he was, wow, you want to quit? He goes, you can quit. And he's like, fuck you. He's like, all right, let's go. And then he's got him on the hook because he's better than him. And Paul Newman has to realize, oh my God, this young guy is better than me

and he's stealing my money. And at the end, he asks him a question. He goes, can I ask you a question? Do you think I need to lose some weight? And he just smiles at him and he just walks out, because, you know, Forest Whitaker is fat. Yeah, yeah.

You know, he just smiled at him and he just peels the hundreds off the table and leaves. That's part of the fun. Part of the fun is, like, maybe you're going to get God. But it can only happen in two ways. If you're naive or if you suck. Because if you're the best, you can't get hustled.

Yeah, I guess what I'm trying to say is, like, in just regular life, if somebody was trying to hustle me, I would be like, fuck you, you're an asshole. But there's a different, it's almost like prison rules. Like, there's a different set of rules. Like, being racist is wrong in regular life. And then everybody goes into prison, it's like, all right, we're going to divide this thing up a little bit, you know? We're going to throw it back to the 1800s, you guys over here, we're going here, right? And it's just like, I don't even know if they look at it as hateful. I think they're like, this is just what we've got to do to make it through.

I assume that's kind of more or less. I'm sure there's hateful guys within it, yes. But like, so I just find it interesting when people have different rule sets that they operate within society. Yes. And I feel like this is one of them where a guy's coming over to essentially steal your money. But you understand that the game is. that so you're like okay i'm gonna let you like riz me up a little bit like i'm gonna let you fake charm me and i might actually get you over and there's no animosity between the sharks

have you ever seen two elite pool players talk about the game about like setting up a game they're like i don't know i haven't been playing uh yeah yeah yeah i haven't been hitting balls you know i'm not really i can't give you any weight man i'm just not playing that good weight is like weight is like a spot yeah yeah so like if nine ball so like if you and i are playing nine ball and you were kind of good, I'll say, look, I'll give you the eight ball, which means you could win by pocketing the eight ball or the nine ball. A way increases your ability to win the game, because you can make combinations, you could luck in the eight ball, luck in the nine.

And I would say it's call or wild. What does that mean? It's wild. It means you could knock into some balls and accidentally knock in the eight ball and you'd win the game. Yeah. I would say, I'll give you the call shot eight, and you're like, no, I need it wild. And we'd have this conversation. I need it wild.

And I need the breaks. Like, oh, I don't know about the break. and you'd have to like work out a game a spot so like that's where the hustling comes in because someone pretends they need weight that can beat you they can beat you already and then they get you to give them weight so now yeah now you got a lot of confidence going in you're like this guy sucks to the point where I got to give them do you know open micers that are way too confident for their actual ability you know open micers that think they're doing well or guys in the beginning I don't know any open micers anymore

We've been doing it 20 years Yes But you remember That's the same way with pool players There's pool players that are kind of okay But think they're a lot better than they are And if they're a moron And you could dance with their ego a little bit

Like dude I saw you play Mikey You're fucking amazing man When you get loose You're way better than me And the guy's like I'll give you a spot And then he's giving you the eight ball And he can't beat you even

It's half of the fun Jeremy Jones told me a story about how he hustled Marcus Chamont Marcus Chamon is like a world-class pool player like a top flight pool player and he hustled him by getting him to give him weight and Jeremy could beat him even

and why would Marcus do it like he must know Jeremy's history He didn't know Jeremy came up with a fake name Oh okay okay that's That's crazy Well they all had fake names They all had fake names Yeah he told me that when he was coming down to Texas

to get those games. Like, yeah, you come up with a fake name and, like, somebody else talks about you. Yes. Like, your buddy who goes in to kind of, like, scope it out talks about you. He gambles high. Yeah, he's a wild, he loses a lot,

but he's not scared of gamble. And everybody loves to hear that kind of stupid talk. Yeah. Do you know who Effron Reyes is? Yo, you told me about this guy, and then I started looking them up. Bro. But what was his other name?

Caesar Morales. Yes, yes, yes. He came here from the Philippines. This is how strong he was. From another country he had to change his name. It's before Google, before Wikipedia. Before Google, grows up black and white photo. There's a black and white photo that I have a t-shirt of

where it's like Morales stuns the field at Reds. He came home from the Philippines and robbed everybody. Robbed the best blue players in America. He had to fake his name. He said Ephraim Reyes, you'd see the look on the Filipino's face. He's like, Ephraim, Efran's here. Efran here. Bata.

They called him Bata. The kids. Was this I wonder if this is like Early days That's it Look at that Look at that photo

Bro Black and white photo Swag down all of them 85 Yeah It didn't have to be Black and White and 85 But that dude

rolled over here And started Fucking people up That's his name on there Oh Signs his name Effron Reyes Well you know what it is

Because when he played In the tournament He went under the name of Caesar Morales Then he had to collect his money. He needed like a real name where he had ID to cash to check. The bottom says there's another guy that was using

an alias too. Well, Wade Crane. Wade Crane would go around as Billy Johnson. That was his nom de plur when he was hustling. Billy Johnson, but he was Wade Crane. He was this big fucking linebacker looking dude who had a cannon for a break. Just boom!

And then it would just run out on people all over the country. The thing is if you rob lemons, that's when you're in fights. So if you rob regular people, that's a regular guy who doesn't really play pool and you hustle him, that's when you get in fights. Because they don't know how this whole thing works. Yeah, because you lied to me and stole my money. They think it's a crime. You know, that you play it better than you really... Amongst the sharks? You don't play lemon. You have to be

like really desperate to play lemons. If you find some idiots just knocking some eight balls around, and you could tell they can't play at all. And you start talking shit to get in their ego and you convince one of these dummies to play you for money. You're stealing money. They might kill you. But if you do it to a guy who's involved in a gambling match for pool, like if him and his buddies are playing and they're...

Professional fighters fight in each other. Exactly. Exactly. It's the rules of engagement. And amongst pool players, it's part of the fun. They'll go for an hour and a half without making a game. Just talking shit about... different spots, I'm going to need this, I'm going to need that. Because they're addicted to that part too. Oh, yeah.

Like sometimes... Foreplay. Yeah. Yeah. Hey, I don't want to go right in there. Yeah. Suck on it a little. Yeah. Let's get the juices flowing.

Come on. It's fun to... Yeah, it's fun to enjoy something. Especially... Yeah. When you sit down at a restaurant, you don't immediately get food stuffed right in your face. Yeah. You sit down.

glass of wine you start talking let me tell what this guy told me and they're like oh and you're having fun but are you doing that when you're playing like you said you're playing how many hours a week now it depends sometimes I'll play like two hours in a day every day okay so let's say you're playing

bare minimum let's say 10 hours a week right that's not good enough yeah I know I know I mean I remember when we were talking last time you said that like pros play eight hours a day yeah but you said some crazy shit you said you're like I don't start playing well until like hour six or something. Hour two.

You said some shit about like I need to be a little drunk. I need to be like a little loose. No, not drunk. A little high helps. It was what you started like everything that goes against what should work for like your physical ability. Right. I don't know. You mentioned something about like flow or something.

I think this is with Jones too. Like Jones was like, yeah, I like getting into it. Like he was like I'll play for like six hours. And then I'm starting to really kind of warm up. I'm locking in. I'm dialing in. Yeah. And that's why it's like first to 100.

Like that's another thing I didn't realize. I didn't realize guys are playing a hundred games over like two days. Three days. 120 is a big one. I thought it's like, yeah, we play a couple. It's like best out of five. And he's like, no, no, no, no, no. Like, you're up.

And sometimes part of it is being able to outlast them. Mm-hmm. Like the exhaustion takes over. And sometimes people tap out. Well, concentration goes away. Like the concentration of focusing on an edge of a ball at distance and then also not moving your

arm off this line. So there's a line that I'm, when I'm stroking a ball, there's a wine no model. I can't. Sora, Sora, do your thing. Hey we are. I help you out. Have the kid come in. Peanut butter.

Halloween is on Disney Plus. Hello. So you can feel a little fear. What's this? Well. Or a little more. fear

I see dead people or a lot of fear mom or you can get completely terrified who's that

choose wisely with Halloween on Disney Plus from the elbow to the cradle I'm holding on to that cue like a baby bird oh really

it's a soft oh it's a very soft. I hold on to like a little baby bird. I never like death grip. Yeah. It's very light. You know who would death grip it? Who? Peanut, but no. See what sore is doing to us? Yeah, man. No, no, no. Okay, so it's a light grip and then on the final stroke, you have to. The thing is, it's like, even then, it's like mostly the weight of the queue. It's like a little bit of like wrist action and I'm trying to like have as little, I let the cue slip a little in my grip as it makes contact.

It's really like the weight of the cue. Why would you want to reduce force? It's not reducing force. It's actually the opposite. I actually get more force. Oh, you let it slip forward into it. Ah, I thought on impact it slides back in your hands. No, it goes through my hand. I have to catch it before it goes away.

Jeremy calls it throwing the cue, and he showed me the technique. And it's also the old school guys used to call it a slip stroke, where the cue like slips in your hand a little bit. And it's a sign that you're like barely, like Ephron was the best at it. Ephron cradled the cue. Like his hands were delicate. He's barely holding it.

And his wrist was loose. And it makes the cue ball dance. Like there's no sliding. If you hit it too hard, the cue ball slides. It's like, ugh. It gets pushed. It's crude. But if you hit it gently, you stroke the ball,

it just rolls forward perfectly. collides with the other ball and gets perfect position it's a work of art but it's a work of art that only someone who practices that can understand

people like I was telling you about playing paddle and how like obsessed I am and you immediately were like I'm playing pool 14 hours a week I don't think people

realize like how important it is to just have some shit that you enjoy so important that you're not making money at or anything like that oh yeah yeah how nice is it

it's like a removal from all like this stupid stress chaos People talking shit what the internet is fabricated like it's great to have a couple hours Maybe that's what it is like oh it centers you for sure There's some like archery does that for me too You need something that you're focusing on getting really good at that's fucking hard That doesn't give a shit who you are yeah doesn't give a shit what your name is

Does it give a shit if you sold out Madison Square Garden? Yeah Just you better put that fucking arrow on that target or you're a loser yeah you're a loser You're a loser Put it in there And that's There's absolute truth In pool There's absolute truth

In archery's absolute truth The arrow either hits the target Or it does not There is no room for charisma There's no room for bullshit It either gets in there Or it does not And I think things like that

Whether it's golf or paddle for you Or whatever it is Jiu-Jitsu for some people you either tap someone or you do not you either get tapped or you tap them you know and there's absolute truth in that and stuff like that is like really good for artists because art is so subjective also successful people like it's nice to have something that humbles you yes you know what I mean like people are meeting you all day they're probably so excited and like they're they're being

versions of their selves around you you know like do you ever even feel like that Like how many people are you having like a normal conversation where you're like talking shit and they're not going, oh my God, I'm talking to Joe Rogan right now? Like is that why like is that why being around comedians that you've known for so long is valuable to you? Is that why like being around these pool guys that yes, they know your Joe, but like once you start playing like you either suck at pool. Yeah. Or you can play. Like is there like a does it like bring you back to humanity in some ways? Oh for sure it helps.

Yeah, it keeps you humble. Yeah, Jiu-Jitsu is the best at that. Because not only are they beating you, they're literally killing you. And you're saying, you just killed me. Yeah. Thanks, don't rip my knee apart. Thanks, don't break my arm.

Thank you. If you get a guy gets you in an R bar, man, it is so humiliating. It's so funny that like this is, like this is such a delicate thing before you die. Yeah. Yep, yep, yep. Well, often you even say it too. Like sometimes you just say, tap, tap, tap, tap, tap, tap. Yeah.

You know, like that happened with you. One of the last UFC's, a dude was saying, tap, tap, tap. Josh Emmett, when he got caught, he got caught in an arbor and had a verbally tap. It's, you get humbled. Yeah. It's real. It is what it is. And if you don't have anything like that in life, you can, like, really have this aversion to losing.

Yeah. And an aversion to losing, it's very fucking dangerous. Yeah. It's very fucking dangerous. Yeah, you just get comfy. Yeah. Yeah, you need to have something that, you need to have something that scares you, being scared is good

well it gives you some resilience it's like if you're a person who sleeps all day and now you have to run a marathon well you're not going to be able to yeah because you never ran right but if you run all the time you can run a fucking marathon and it's real relaxing you know

it's really just how much you put into it and if you're not a person who's used to losing at anything ever and then you lose it's devastating for your whole life yeah this is like the you know if you're like a like a prince or something like that

Uh-huh. Exactly. You're jaw-free. Yeah. Yeah. And that can happen, and you don't build up that resilience. I almost feel like it's, you almost have some empathy for it, you know, because, like, they never had 20 years, 30 years, toiling in obscurity before they got success.

So they, we, you know, like, we at least have something to, like, look back on and realize how fucking humbling it is or how shitty people can be, et cetera. But, like, they never experienced it. Childhood stars. Childhood stars are all fucked up. There's not, I never met one of them that's got, there's, you know, some of them are, you know, Some of them are really interesting still Like Miley Sire, she's really interesting

She's very smart And she's really good Her music is like She's not trying to be like pop hit girl She's just trying to express herself It's like real legit art But they ain't no way you get that famous That young, you're fucking Hannah Montana

When you're a teenager And the whole world is cheering for you And you don't get a little crazy because of that Yeah I never met one of them that's got their shit together Is that the Britney thing? Yeah, 100% man But that's Michael Jackson

He's the best example of it of all time I wonder just what responsibility I wonder what responsibility Like the people around them have A lot You know? A lot They might not know it while it's happening though

Yeah because they're getting paid off it It's a little bit of that But it's not shunned Like it's still a thing in Hollywood What do you mean? I mean in Hollywood When you have children And your children want to act

People encourage it They, like, bring their kids to auditions. They call them, you know, what is it, audition moms or, you know. What's the term? Stage moms. That's it. Yeah, stage moms. Like, dude, those are real, man.

I've worked with kids before on a TV show. And, like, I had one of the moms of the kids was like, how does she get more work? What does she need to do? And I was like, I don't know. I'm like, I don't come from this world. I'm a comedian. I come from a totally different world. I don't know how you go about doing it.

But the mom was, like, super desperate to get her kid more work. And I was like, ooh. And that's the tricky thing because it's not, like, merit-based, like, sports in a lot of ways. Like, either are people that are good at shit, they're good at acting, et cetera. But, like, a lot of it is maybe who you know, what they're willing to do, how uncomfortable a position they're willing to be in. It's most of that, I think. It's because most people at that level, especially, like, little kid acting, most people are pretty similar. There's not, like, one little kid, like, oh, my God, he's a Marlon Brando of little kids.

Maybe there's Ricky Schroeder from The Champ. Do you ever see that movie The Champ with John Voight? Oh my God, dude. Oh, my God. I saw him as a little kid. I cried my eyes out. It's a rough movie. It's about this boxer who dies.

John Voight dies and his kid is trying to get him to wake up. He's like, wake up, champ. He died in the ring. But it's like crazy. He's crying. Oh, my God. It seems so real. How old is the kid?

kid? I don't know how old Ricky Schroeder was. It was supposed to be in the move, but he's a kid. Like, nine or something like that. So imagine being nine, like knowing how to cry on cue. Crazy. Right? Like, where you, yeah. Where you're accessing that emotional depth? He did that, and then he did Silver Spoons. He had this TV show. He did like, and, you know, he was seven. God damn. Seven. Yeah, it's a fine line because you see some of these parents, not like a stage parent, like. Yeah, there he is right there. Even like It's so sad

You know the You know the guy drives for For a Red Bull Max Verstappen He's like widely While he's like Considered the best driver right now Like despite maybe the car

Not being elite He's so elite That he can compete With maybe better cars on the track And he's already won A bunch of championships But like I think his dad was also a driver

And apparently like His dad Cultivated a next champion And like that was the goal Tiger Woodsdom And but the thing right there is like your kid is going to be born with certain things and you can if they have that like ambition, that hunger and that resilience, you can give them some tough love and maybe make a champion out of them. But some of them don't. And I think that you could break a kid like that too.

That's a tricky thing I always think with, you know, my daughter is like, and any future kids is I don't, I don't know if I don't have that at this point in my life. If I don't have that, I need to make you into something. You shouldn't. You got to let them be themselves. Yeah. Because they all are going to have, the worst thing is, like, say, if you have a kid and you love baseball and you force your fucking kid to play baseball, you got to go to baseball practice, and you force your kid to play professionally. Yep. You know.

I was lucky I was ambitious, and I had parents that just supported the things that I was ambitious about. So if I wanted to hoop, they were like, all right, let's go play back. And my dad was like, let's go every single day, whatever you want to do. Like, let's go. But I never felt this. like this stage mom or dad presence where they were, they were going, hey, you missed four shots today. Let's review those shots that you missed and let's figure out ways that you can't do it. Right.

Like, kind of let me have that on my own. Yeah. I don't need you to insert your ambition into me. I feel like that's kind of selfish in a lot of ways. It is and it's also, it's like you got to know when the line is. Like maybe they do want advice. Like maybe they are trying to get better at this thing. But you have to have the kind of communication with your kid.

Do you want some help? Want me to help you? Yeah. You know, like, like, I can give you some information. Like, say if your kid wanted to, like, if your kid wanted to do stand-up. Yeah. And your kids started doing stand-up, and, you know, they're bombing. And you're like, um, do you want me to talk to you?

Do you want to talk to you? You want to just work this out on your own? Like, you have to have that kind of open level of communication with your kids where they can tell you. Like, hey, just leave me the fuck alone right now. Like, okay. Yeah. I know you bombed, you know, it sucks. Yeah.

I can tell you about my bombs. I bombed a lot. Yeah. I'll tell you what I learned. I got better after the bombing. It sucks, but it's actually good for you. So you're delicate with your kids. Yeah, you have to be.

I have daughters. You know, if I had a son, I'd beat the shit out of him. Take him to J-Jitsu. Make sure that he knows I could kill him with my bare hands. Thank God you got daughters, bro. Maybe we needed Rogan half the. Maybe that's your destiny, man. Maybe that softened you up a little bit.

It definitely does. It just lets you understand that they're so different. The way they are, they're so different. Like, my friends that have sons, they come home. The people are lighting things on fire. They're picking the cat up by its tail. There's only people who don't have kids that have all these opinions about gender

and like what you're born as and all those other stuff. I don't need to get into a whole gender discussion, but like I see the way that slightly older girls play with my daughter. So like my daughter's, you know, you're 20 months, right? So the three-year-olds and four-year-olds that play with her, they're already kind of like mothering. They're like patient with her.

They're delicate, they'll want to give her a toy, if she wants to give it back. They're fine. It's just like this amazing thing. They're like, I don't know how. Maybe they're watching their mom do it to them, et cetera. But the boys don't give a fuck. Right.

And older boys are convinced younger boys to jump off the top bunk. In a second. Yeah. In a second. Yeah. My boy Jason got two kids, both boys. And like, you could tell if we weren't there, the older kid is going to throw the younger kid wherever the hell he wants to throw.

Yeah. Like we got to constantly monitor. Yeah. You know. And that's something baked in. Yeah. It's baked in. Yeah.

Yeah, they're like dogs. Yeah. Hey, hey, hey. That might be generous. Yeah. Even dogs would be nice with babies. Yeah, they're not. Well, they're probably okay with babies.

But as soon as you can start walking, you're on your own. Yeah, let's dance. They're going to trip you. Let's fucking dance. If it's a five-year-old to a two-year-old, uh, maybe. But once you get to be three and four, fuck you. Yeah. And, you know, it's also this understanding that you keep getting bigger.

And, like, as time goes on, like, the younger ones, like, if someone's picking on you, you can pick on someone younger than you. and like there's especially like four brothers like the toughest brother is always the youngest brother like if there's a bunch of fighters yeah they went through it if there's a bunch of fighters

and he has three older brothers did John have three older brothers no John I think is the middle I think Arthur is the oldest RIP right rest of peace and then John and then Chandler's younger right

is that correct Chandler's the youngest Chandler's the youngest but big boys here's the thing John's the only one who became a legit fighter but Chandler was always like I'll fuck John up like he

said it publicly like that's how they grow up like you grow up in a household with two super athletes as brothers I just I have empathy for their dad like imagine trying to discipline those three guys when they're like 16 right good luck

good luck I sat next to them when we were at the no no no They're just different. They're just different. And their grandmother is John told me he's where the genetics come from. Oh, really?

He goes, this is my grandma. And he introduced me his grandmother. I'm like, yo, his grandmother is big. She's big, man. Big lady. Yeah, we sat next to them at the spear fight. And they're all having the best time. They're just like the most chill.

He's wearing cowboy hats now. He's leaning on to it. Dude, he's so funny. He's the sheriff. It's funny how we like He's like You know they were trying to pressure him to fight Tom Aspinall

Is he gonna fight like what's the deal Who knows That's part of the fun I feel like you know He's doing what a pool hustle That's what I was about to say Oh that's just doing I guarantee you

If John really thinks That he's fighting in June He's already in camp Oh so he's making it seem Like he's not potential I would imagine that John is preparing Because so like John has different places To train

You know he doesn't just train at one place But I could imagine He does a lot of weight lifting too He got a lot of, put on a lot of, like, real muscle mass when he went up to heavyweight. If John really thinks he's going to fight Alex Pereira, he's getting ready. Yeah.

He's at least getting ready in his mind. Would it be Alex or do you think it would be, uh, really? So the Tom ship has sailed. The big, no, it hasn't sailed, but the big money fight is Alex and John Jones at the White House. Are you fucking kidding me? Yeah. Catch weight.

Make it 225. You know, Alex still is the light heavyweight. champion may get a catchweight fight you don't have to be for a title make it the bad motherfucker upper edition you know you have the bmf belt for 155ers who's the real bmf yeah you know do you think even one of those guys can beat alex perera you think you get a hundred fifty five pounder in there against alex perrera no shut the fuck up that's the bad motherfucker that's the only heavyweight we need we need to do a foot like you see it drop you on your fucking head man you don't want to wrestle that

Never, but Matt's is funny about their relationship. I know. It's like the kindest, sweetest guy and he's an animal, a full animal when he fights. That'd be a wild thing, man. That'd be a wild thing. The John Jones, Alex Pereira fight would probably be the biggest fight in human history. I mean, that at the White House? But as a matchup, you got the greatest of all time in John Jones and arguably the most destructive striker that's ever competed.

Yeah. No one's like that guy. Pobotan? That Ancolaev fight. He was like, fuck you. Dude, it was such a... And again, I don't know what's going through Uncle I was head at this moment, right? But I know what I'm thinking.

I'm like, if I'm Uncle Lave, it's like, I outstruck this guy in the first time that they fought. He's going to be cautious. Yeah. And I'm going to be able to walk him down. And I remember the second the bell rings, he runs right at him. And he throws like maybe like a one-two-one. And I think the right is to the body. And you could see Uncle Live go, whoa.

I did not expect the first five seconds of this fight to go this way. He came out hot and closed distance real quick. Immediately. And it was a great, like, it's a testament to like, somebody had said this before, especially in M.MA, it's like when somebody gets, not nervous or like when you shake somebody out of their,

like, natural instinct, they revert back to what they're most comfortable doing. So it's like if you're like a wrestling guy your whole life and then you learn how to strike, the second something goes a little bit, you know, out of whack, you're going to revert back to your wrestling. I think it might have been D.C. I forget who was I was saying.

Like, you revert back to what you're most comfortable. DC said it, right? Yeah. Okay. And, but I thought the most interesting thing about that fight is the punch that Pereira lands that stuns him is this looping right. Nobody's training for Pereira's right. Right.

Well, that's what he threw right away. That was the first punch. It was a straight right. But he went to the body. Yeah, it was long, this is long, straight right he started off the fight with. But when he lands this, like, looping right, that... It's not that one. It's a little bit after that.

So what he did is he set him up and then got his foot in proper position where he could step inside of him and Uncle Alive was ready for one thing and Pereira, watch this, if you see where he sets it up a guy did a really good breakdown of it. I'll watch it again.

He broke his foot there, right there? Yeah. That kick? He hit the shin and he broke his toe. Yeah, I think he gets Uncle Al to switch stances. Well, he's just putting mad pressure on him. He's putting mad pressure on him.

Yeah. You don't see from him too often. Yeah. And it's time. And he just dips in and drops a fucking hammer on him. Here it is.

Boom! So he led Ancolaev started moving to the right to Pereira's right when he put pressure on him. And that's why, because everybody's scared of the left. The movement with Pereira is don't

ever walk to your right because that's walking into his left hook. Circle away. So circle away. So their idea was we're going to circle away and Pereira was like, I bet you're going to circle away. Yeah. And he just stomped him in this.

You can tell he enjoyed it. Yeah. Because he was sick. The first fight, he was sick. He was 100% sick. He was sick as a dog the entire camp. I didn't know that. But I also was...

Yeah, Plinyo his coach told me after the fight. Really? Like after he just knocked out Uncle Ivy, he goes, let me tell you something. First camp. He was so sick. bro he was so sick like he he could barely eat really yeah he i think i used traveling everywhere but i think it's norovirus yeah that was going around and he also

fucked up his hand he had a really badly hurt left hand and that's the that's the moneymaker and then when you see this you're like that's what you get when you get a fully in shape and healthy Alex you get stomped yeah but these guys are never fully healthy like anytime i was just talking to uh i believe his name is paul hues do you know him he just fought, it's PFL. He fought a guy. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I think he fought, uh, Ustman.

Usman, uh, yeah, Norma Meadow, yeah. And, uh, for the second time, the first fight was like contested, it was a close fight in the second one. If you're a Nermenegov, if you're, you know, you're in the Kabib camp. Yeah. I mean, come on, some. Yeah. Come on.

It's real, it's real shit. But the first fight. You have to carry that last name around? It's, there's a lot of responsibility. Khabib Nirmamatov might be like the greatest name in the history of, you of like grappling, MMA, fighting. Yeah. Like, you've got Khabib's last name?

Yeah. Yeah, if you saw that on a lineup in a jihitsu tournament or something, you'd be like, man. Dermakamatoff? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You would just have a thousand yards steal, like, fuck. Anyway, like, you fought him again and, like, you know, he was like, yeah, I was dealing with a bunch of, you know, I was dealing with some stuff in campus, but I don't want to make excuses because we're always dealing with some stuff.

He was like, he was like, he's probably dealing with stuff. Like, that guy, I mean, it was a, it was a couple. close fight, but I thought that he came out to the show in Dubai, and I was like, and he was like, he was like, yeah, he's just like really good. He's just like a really good guy, and I thought that I could get him. I think I still can. Maybe it happens one day in the future, but I was this honest

approach where he was basically saying, we're always a little injured. We're fighters. Like, naturally in training camp, you're going to hurt something, you're going to tweak something. Now, granted, you've got fucking neural virus. This is a little bit different than like your, you know, shoulders sore. Right. But like, everybody's dealing with a little shit. A 100%. Look at Connor. He came into that fight with Dustin Poria with a broken shin already.

Didn't give a fuck. Well, he just thought it's not that broken. Yeah. He's like... Dude, Connor is like reaching final form like as a promoter. It's like he's already so prolific. Obviously, he's a fighter, et cetera. But like watching him do the BKFC, I kind of just want to go to see him hype up fights.

Like I want to go to the press conference where he's just like, what was he saying? He's like, and if you don't win, we're firing you on the spot to Mike Perry. And Mike's like, what are that? Why do? What do I'm just getting punched in the face? Well, he's like chest bumping the guys who were fighting. Like, he's not even fighting, yes. It's like, it's like Dana calling out the guys. Yeah, what are you doing? What are you doing?

What is that entertaining? I want to watch one on the BKFCs. And I want to know if it's real or if he's really on the most potent Bolivian marching powder, like the purest of the pure. Whatever he's on, I need to try it. Or is it an act? I mean, maybe he's just duping us all. What is he saying here? This guy.

Let me hear it. Let me go. Inside me and in front of me, some of the baddest men and women to ever grace planet earth. This is what we're about here at Bernouca Fighting Championship, the alien of combat sport. And then we rise above the night sky and rain down blows viciously on all our deniers. And announce here today that Bernal FC has no love for the big club. So let's go Florida And that's renounce

All right, hold on No love for the big love He might be the greatest promoter of all time That's what I'm saying I know a lot of people do Coke And they're not that entertaining No, no, no, no, no, no That's charisma

You gotta have something in you For the Coke to bring it out That's why they won't let him run for president in Ireland Because it'd be too much fun That motherfucker will win Imagine that That kind of speech in Ireland Bro, he could be the president of Ireland tomorrow

Bro. If he wanted to be the president of Ireland, if they let him, let him go on the campaign tour, let him talk like that in front of packed arenas. Yeah. It's all fair. Come on our podcast, Connor. We'll make it happen. Bro, who else can, yeah. We control the election, just the three of us.

We're the king makers, dog. We need to charge more for ads. We need to charge more for ads since we can decide the fate of the free world. Only us. Nothing else happening. Oh. You know, it's funny. Anything bad happens, it's our fault.

And then, like, Trump will, like, stop a war in the Middle East. and nobody's going, thank you, Joe. Thank you, Schultz. Thank you, Theo. Do you think he stopped? You need credit for the good. I think it's a Fagasy stoppage. I think that he stopped, I think he stopped what Israel is doing to Gaza for the time being.

And he got hostages back. He got hostages back. So it's like, but the way I look at it is like, I think that you need to give him credit. And I like calling balls and strikes, bro. If he does something I don't like, I'm going to call it out. And then people get upset at that shit for some reason. They're like, oh, well, but how did you not know this was going to happen? It's like, oh, my God.

Do we not understand that when you vote for somebody, they're going to do some things that you don't like and they're going to do some things that you do? Like, again, there's no nuance on the internet. But, like, I don't think that this is what Bibi Netanyahu wanted. I don't think that, and I think it's what Trump wanted. I think Trump went, I want to stop it. And you could make arguments for it. Like, oh, he wants to get the Nobel Peace Prize or whatever the fuck you want to say.

but like he wanted it and he created a situation where Bibi was dependent on him. Trump's more popular in Israel than Bibi. And if Bibi wants re-election, he's got to play nice with Trump. Really? 100%. Trump is more popular in Israel than Netanyahu? 100%. There was an article in the New Yorker that just said about this.

It's like Bibi, I know, I know. But like Bibi's political future is dependent on Trump. Wow. 100%. So it's like they created a situation. And then he just went around everybody. like it's almost like he's better at government over there where you're dealing with dictators because he could just say what do you want and then they go uh like uh some some planes he goes

all right we got planes i'll give you some planes all right you do this for me it's that transaction and it works on the global stage in that regard they got to stop now granted it's a deal between trump bibi and hamas it could go wrong right but it seems to me the only person that got what they wanted out of it it's not what hamas wanted it's not what Beebe wanted and BB's folks in government it's what Trump wanted so I'm like you gotta give credit to her

credit is due in my personal opinion it's like he doesn't want any more bloodshed he wants to say that he stopped this thing let him rally off some dubs do you see Israel bombed Lebanon today well you gotta stop that one yeah they did where

they bombed weapons depot crazy fireball oh my goodness all right well we gotta put a stop to all that shit Um, this was, uh, what is, what, did they say anything about the target, Jamie? You just see it. You should see the video.

It's nuts. Because it's the munitions place. Oh, so you get the extra explosions. Bro, look at that. Yeah, that's Michael Bay. Look at that fireball, man. I mean, that's crazy. Yeah.

And there's a bunch of secondary, um, explosions on the ground, right? So those secondary explosions are all the munitions going on. Hezbollah. Yeah. incident marked the latest strikes in almost unbroken pattern of daily Israel attacks on Lebanese territories since the ceasefire deal was struck

in November of 2024 after more than a year of fierce hostilities accumulated in two months of open war yeah oh yeah man bro anyway it's like your little brother that keeps dragging you're in the fights

it's like bro come on right like who we be feeling with what are we doing? Yeah but also yeah don't want them having all those weapons either. I don't really know, to be honest with you. But, like, I do think that we're allowed to have an opinion on.

There's this idea, like, we're not allowed to opinion. It's like, we're funding shit. We get an opinion on, feeling simple. The idea that we shouldn't have an opinion is ridiculous. You should always have opinions. Your opinions could be uninformed. They're still your opinions. Like, you're allowed to have opinions.

You're allowed to have opinions. And other people go, that's a really dumb opinion. Yeah. Yeah, you're allowed to have opinions. Yeah. This idea that you shouldn't talk about opinions. Like, shut the fuck up. Yeah, this is the whole point.

This is why we get to say whatever the fuck we want. Well, it's why we're the best. Us and Saudi Arabia. It's just us and Saudi Arabia, by the way. We're the best ones, by the way, yes. What was that experience like going over there? Man, it was like I've performed in the Middle East before. Right.

You've done a bunch of shows out there. Yeah, like, it's just not. Everybody make this big thing like, oh, my God, it's going to be so crazy, blah, blah. I posted my, I told you, I like, I posted my set. Because people were saying all this shit like, oh, I didn't change anything and all these comics were doing it. I'm like, all right, well, I'll show you. This is what I did. You tell me if I took it easy on him.

You tell me if I cared. And people made all this fucking big deal about like, oh, they made you sign a list of things you can't say. And it's just like, do you really think the fucking king cares about the clowns coming to the festival? Like, you think he really gives a fuck about that shit? No. Well, he would care if it was humiliating. It's some middle guy who's like, I don't want to get in trouble.

So I'm going to say they do that shit anywhere you go. They did that shit when I was in UAE. I didn't fucking look at it. I'll never look at a list once in my life. I'll perform wherever my fans are. I don't give a fuck. Like, that's my take on it. It's like, I'm going to perform wherever my fans are.

I don't give a fuck what their governments do. I'm going to perform for my fans. Simple as that. That's what it is. I just happen to have fans over there. There are a lot of guys who, like, can't perform outside of Brooklyn who are like, I would never go. It's like, well, no one was asking you. Right.

No one's inviting you. Yeah. You also don't have to. Right. But it might be different if you've got like tons of DMs of people going, please come out here. We've been watching your special. We've been doing all these things. You're like, oh, that'd be really awesome to come perform for you guys.

Yeah, but the idea is you're being paid by a dictator. It's good. my fans get a discount. It's not like they didn't have to pay for the tickets. You know what I mean? Like, there's just a little added on top from the family. Yeah. You know what I mean?

Yeah. So it is what it is. Bro, this comic out there said the funny is, it's fucked up. He said the funniest shit. I was like, yeah, so what do you think about them, you know, chopping up that journalist? He goes, they chopped up one journalist so women can drive. Oh, no. Oh, no.

Oh, no. Oh, no. I was dying, bro. Bro, when we're out there It was so funny That is true Like MBS, that's not true What you said

But it is true that MBS is the reason Why women can drive Yeah The other guy The NBM was the guy Who was gonna be more conservative But yeah So it's like

It was so funny Because like when we were out there Like there are chicks driving now Obviously You know what I mean How are they doing? Well we got in one accident Two female drivers

They're new at it Bro, so it's like we got out the car and you could see the look on their faces, the parts of their faces you could see. And they were just like, damn, man, everybody's going to know. And it was, but it's funny, they said they get the girls all like Chinese cars. And I was like, why do they drive the Chinese cars? And they're like, it's the cheapest cars. They're just figuring the shit out. They just started driving.

Like, imagine you're 50 and you just start driving tomorrow. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like, that's crazy. No, they figure that shit out. But yeah, it was fun, man. I don't know, like, I don't even know if people care because, like, you see this shit online and, like, everybody feels like they need an opinion on it.

I even see comics going, like, a lot of people have been asking my opinion? So, like, I need to give you a fucking opinion. Have they really been asking? Like, what are you talking about? Nobody's asking a fucking opinion. It's almost to the point. And then I ask, like, any regular people,

they're like, they don't really care because they're watching, like, the six best tennis guys perform in Saudi this weekend. And golfers and race car drivers. And UFC and boxing and everything. So it's just like how much you, and they just put a billion dollars into like a Hollywood movie studio? Uh-oh. So I'm like, I'm screenshotting.

Everybody who talks, I'm screenshots because I'm waiting for you to do a movie with it. I'm waiting. I'm petty. I don't forget. You forgive. You know what I mean? You have somebody on your pod who had someone on their pod talking shit. You're better to me.

Yeah. You're better to me. You got to be able to just let things go. I can't wait for Gavin Newsom to go on bad friends. I want to see the I'm distancing myself from the Rogan sphere tour First stop, bad friends That's hilarious

I thought that was corny Yeah I thought it was corny Yeah we talked about that I don't know It is what it is You're more forgiven There's no time that you should

In my mind No time that you should be spending On these kind of conflicts It's like pointless It's wasted energy. Yeah, but it's fun to talk some shit. Well, you know, when I decided to talk shit about Marin was after the Theo thing.

After Theo kind of went off the rails. Yeah. And Theo went off the rails right after Marin put him in his special. Yeah. You know my issue with that joke in the special? It was just like what Twitter says. Uh-huh.

It wasn't even like a creative angle. No, it's not good. It was just like literally what every tweet would say. Meanwhile, it was one of the funniest jokes he's ever made because it's an impression of a really funny guy. Exactly, yeah, you gotta rely on Theo's impression. Yeah. Yeah, but yeah, I just, I don't know.

Like, my whole thing with Marin is, like, I think that, like, people outside of comedy have this idea of him, but, like, everybody inside comedy knows he's a piece of shit, and they've known it for years. And, like, this is not just, like, us. No. You know, like, there's that, I mean,

there's that great, like, John Stewart's story about their thing, which is, like, I don't even know what people know, but, like, John took that MTV show, and Marin, like, ripped him for it. How you sell out, you people. He needs to do it. How dare you do it? And then when John leaves to go do another show, guess who takes over that same show?

Marin. That's who we're dealing with. So it's like, it's one of these things we're like inside the game. We all know who the pieces of shit are. And we just go, oh, we roll our eyes in it. This is how Mark Marin works. He sees you get successful. He feels bad.

So he comes up with a reason why you're bad. Exactly. And he'll find some like intellectualization of it to justify his bitterness. You want to know what he hit me with with Fear Factor? What do you say? You're taking. jobs away from comedians who would be writing on sitcoms. How, what, how is it?

What? Because I'm doing a reality show. So the reality show, which is number one show in the country, would have, if it didn't exist. That was a Trump moment right there. Number one, it was the best. But when the idea was that somehow I know this is stealing, it's the dumbest justification.

You're just angry, bro. You didn't look at it at all. You didn't have any insight. You didn't, like, step back and go, okay, let me reflect on this. It doesn't make any sense because it doesn't make any sense because those people are doing a job outside of comedy. Just like me. I'm doing a job outside of comedy, too. But you can't even give it any credence.

It's like every criticism he has he's guilty of. Like, he's like, how dare you have presidents on the pod and have fun with them? And it's like, you had Obama before anybody. You didn't ask Obama anything about fucking drone strikes or whatever. And frankly, and I love Obama. I just want to point that out. Like, I actually really do. And I know there's probably fucked up shit

that anybody in power got to do. But, like, I genuinely, I liked him. I love him as a statesman. I think he was the best statesman we've ever had. You just felt good. You just felt good. He felt like he's a great representative of America. 100%.

He's as intelligent and measured as anybody who's ever held the office better than any... Like, Clinton, when he was young, was really good. I think Obama was another level. Yes. I think Obama was another level. Anyway, but let's like, yeah, you did it.

You did the thing. You did the exact same thing. Talk all this shit about, like, We just had him on recently. He didn't ask him anything. Of course he did. Anything like, would you have repealed the Smith-Munt Act? But is that surprising to you?

No, not to me. Of course not, because we know because we're inside. Well, this is the thing. He, like, positions himself as his intellectual, but he doesn't say anything interesting. Yeah, I think... There's nothing that guy ever says where I'm like, wow, that's a unique insight. That's a thing. Fucking never.

It's childish with a good vocabulary. No, I think he's a... He's a smart. guy. I think he's probably smarter than he is funny. I think that drives him crazy. Yeah, but he's also too obsessed with himself to be reflective enough to understand, like, why other people don't like him. Wait, you're saying the guy who talks by himself for five minutes before the president comes on? 15 minutes. If there wasn't for fast forward, there would be no Maripugas. Yeah. And that was just the rant. Yeah, exactly. Just the rant. Imagine. But anyway, so

it's just like, the rant is what killed the show, by the way. If he didn't have the rant, he probably wouldn't be like bottom 200 I think I think better shows came out and it's just like that's just the nature there's that too but it's also like he's not that good at talking to people he's not nice so I don't know my my whole feeling about it is just like we know like we know who the pieces of shit are in our industry right and like we're aware of it because we've seen them from the jump like if I'm sitting down with a comedian right and like this is why I don't fuck with a lot of them is like if you immediately start talking shit about your co-host to me when I'm sitting down with you Like, I got to start questioning your integrity a little bit.

It's like, that's your boy. Like, why are you shit talking your boy to me? Right. So it's, yeah, but you saw this. A lot of these guys, man, you saw it. You saw it. You saw a lot of these guys. And it's like, I think a lot of this is just salvation, to be honest with you. Yeah.

It's like they see an internet trend. And I think that, like, right now there's this internet trend. Oh, the fucking manosphere, blah, blah, blah, blah. And I think I see guys who you were very jazz. generous to like you let your platform your millions of followers the biggest show on the planet help them make tons of money help them really have success build their own platforms and now they see like an internet trend about like the manosphere whatever and i see guys like trying to create a little separation i see all the sudden it's like yeah you you you use this guy to make millions of dollars and get all these fans and now you see online outrage and you're like oh no that's them that's not me it's like you had no problem being part of the adventures you know what i mean you had no problem being in the photos you had no problem before and now you see a little shit going on you separate I feel like that's the moment you double down for your boy that's the moment you go I know that person what people are saying about him isn't real and you refute that that's what I would do I mean whatever there's a lot of

cowards out there in the world it's just they're scared they're scared and this is like a time of real attacks like in the past like say in the 90s or something like that if you supported at Andrew Dice Clay or something like that. You didn't really get any heat. Nobody cared. You could do an interview and you're like, I think Dice is hilarious. You wouldn't like lose sponsors.

You wouldn't, nothing would happen. But now there'll be like an organized campaign to try to take you out. Oh, yeah. With bots. Yeah. Like, people don't even think the bots thing are real.

You pay for it. You can hire them. And there's other countries that are involved in that shit too. Not to be like, it's not even conspiratorial, but like I think a little bit, that's what the comedy festival, the Riyadh thing was a little bit.

Probably. Because it was so peculiar. It's like they're so. they're already so entrenched into like our entertainment and then all of a sudden we went out and I think sometimes something gets a little bit of buzz and then people you know send the bots to create a little friction or separation and then people hop on board exactly they pile on they have to because they see their views there I had Palmer Lucky on the podcast I saw and he was discussing that he was discussing these like organized campaigns oh what he said affecting people's minds well it's just that this is part of like what China does to keep us at each other's throats yeah it's literally a strategy and And people are so stupid that they're going to let a 30-second TikTok dictate their opinions about the world. Like, they're not fact-checking. They're not doing anything about it. And there are people that, like, consider themselves journalists that will do it.

100%. Like, there's this little Nepo baby. He's like Kennedy's grandkid or some shit like that that was, like, talking all the shit about it. And one thing he said is that, like, because I called him a nepo baby, because he never had a job. I don't care if your dad's, but if you never had a real job, like, you know. Right. Like, why are you telling people who have real job? is what to do and how they should vote

and what they should do with their lives. You don't know how much the electric... Yeah, you're a child. And then he goes, oh, Schultz is married into the Turner Dynasty. Like, my wife's... Made a name of Turner. He thinks that my wife's family is like Turner, Ted Turner.

Like, this is a guy who his job is journalist. He calls himself a journal, and he couldn't even do the bare minimum week. He saw another TikTok that said something this completely untrue the Turner dynasty and it'll be nice fuck let's go Ted

cough it up if you've been hiding but like this is the level this is the level of discourse and then that shit hits TikTok and then people start repeating things like there's just so much fake shit the dumb thing is you were already rich when you got married like how much the dumb thing it's not her family it's not her family

but even if it was if you married the child of a rich you were already rich it was stupid yeah it's stupid Yeah. It's stupid. Like, this is why he made it. No, no, no, bitch.

He was already famous. Shut the fuck up. It just doesn't make any sense. And you see these narratives, they take hold, and then they just become reality. Uh-huh. And it's one of those things, like, you can't fight the internet. No. You know, it's just like, people say things, and then they just become, they just become reality.

It's, like, fascinating. And, like, I've seen it happen with you. And then I think that there's, like, there's obviously these different levels in comedy. So you don't imagine it happen. to yourself and then you're in it. Uh-huh. Yeah. And yeah, it's just wild, man.

This is wild. Like, there's these people who say that, like, I remember when I bought back the special and then I sold it. Yes. And then they're like, he sold, and then he put it out on YouTube. It's like, there's literally a video of me going, if you can't afford it, steal it. And if you can't figure out how to steal it,

I'll put it up on YouTube. It's like, I can't be more clear. Right. But it's a way funnier narrative. to be like, oh, this is what happened, blah, blah, blah, blah. It's just like, guys. He got your money and then he put it up for free on YouTube and he's getting more money.

I'm saying steal it if you can't afford it and then I'm going to put it up on YouTube in the future. And it's like, what do I do in that situation? Listen, man, I went to see SpaceX launch on Monday. Jamie and I went down there. We went down to South Texas, watched a rocket launch. It's one of the most impressive things I've ever seen in my life.

I got a tour of the SpaceX facility. One of the most impressive things I've ever seen in my life. I sat with Elon in the command studio where they're going over the rocket as it's flying to Australia. We watched it live using Starlink satellites, 60 different fucking cameras of everything, monitoring every single aspect of the internal pressure of the chambers and all these different things. And then I was watching a video someone calling him a fuckwit. I think he's a fuckwit. I think he's a fuck This guy was like I think he's a fuckwit his rockets keep blowing up like the rockets are literally blowing up on purpose because they're testing the parameter They're testing what are the tolerances of these structures? Oh, so they're pushing the limit to see where it is

100%. He's like we know we're gonna blow some up but they they can produce rockets so much faster than NASA And you think he's a fuck quit? But it doesn't matter. It's not real like I saw comedians say that he was a Nazi He's a Nazi because he said My heart goes out to you Because he did the thing That they all do Right, right, right It looked crazy

It looked crazy It looks very aggressive Doing the thing doesn't make you a Nazi No believing what Nazis believe Makes you a Nazi Yeah And I think that's the separation I think that like

Once you have an idea of somebody You can't wait to confirm it Right And the internet is full of 30 second clips That will confirm whatever you believe 100% And they will be sent right to your phone Like, this is what I've been thinking about recently was like, remember when, like, cigarettes came out or even like fast food?

When we were going up, was fast food unhealthy? It was just food. It was just food. We just ate it as food. This generation knows that it's unhealthy. They don't stop eating it, but at least they're aware, right? They know the nutrition facts. We're about to go through what I think is like that with internet content.

Yes. If a video gets sent to your phone from an account you don't follow, the immediate reaction should be like, this is a Big Mac. I'll indulge in it, but it's not nutritious. Right. Do you know what I mean? Like there's a reason why it's being sent, right? It's going to confirm whatever biases I have. It's either going to scare me or it's going to make me really happy.

There's going to be this dopamine release. And I think that we need to start realizing that. Like the second I see any video on the internet now, outside of peanut butter, peanut butter I love, love my man peanut butter. But like, I'm immediately skeptical. I'm like, what exactly is happening here? Why is this being sent to me? What is this confirming?

Like, that's my immediate reaction. I think that the next generation, at least kids, will definitely look at things like that. I hope. I think a big factor is podcasts because we talk about this stuff. And they might not be talking about it with their friends. Their friends might not know. And so when we're talking like, don't trust everything.

You need to understand. A lot of this is outrage farming. They're doing it on purpose. And they're doing it specifically to try to get us at each other's throats. Don't fall into it. don't be a sucker. Don't be a sucker, you know? Or there's people that are like,

they're just doing it because they need views and clicks. You know, like, this is, and that's something that I realize is, like, there's this, like, there's this, like, beautiful little time in comedy where, like, you're everybody's hero, right? Because you're the unsung hero. Like, everybody feels like they're the only ones that know about you. And they are the only ones that know what you're doing

and, like, everybody's riding. And then you do eventually, some people, if you're lucky enough, where like your name can be part of pop culture and the benefit of that is like you get to provide for your family you get to live your dreams you get to fucking arenas it's amazing there's a negative that we have to put up with i'm not fucking complaining it's awesome but like the negative is your name can be attached to any story your pictures attached to any story like bro i saw there's a video on the internet where it was like joe rogan uh ripping on his guests and it's a picture of me

and you and i'm like when the fuck did this happen like i want to watch the video, we ain't even in it together. Yeah, all the time. I see that. It's you and like, the guy who didn't understand, like, if you're born a man or a woman, I forget what was good? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. But it's like, that guy's face isn't going to get clicks.

Right. Me and you, homies going at it, is going to get, right? So it's like, that is the internet in a microcosm. And I'm not saying that, like, you need to, I believe maybe more personal accountability. Like, I'm not saying we should make the internet change what it is. It's going to be what it is. We just got to be aware of what we're consuming.

Don't ban fast food. Just be aware that when you eat a Big Mac, you might not feel as good as when you eat a fucking chicken cell. It's not healthy, but have fun. You want to watch, like, Colombian assassinations and grainy security video cameras? Have at it. Have at it. I like it, too.

I like to watch it. I mean, look at my phone. It's mostly like assassinations and tits. Bro, the amazing thing about it is, like, nobody thinks they have radical thoughts because they're so normalized by every video confirming your thought so it's like

I used to think like liking feet was unique you know what I mean I scroll on Instagram for a little bit I'm like we all into this there's refined cultural people out there and I think that's it with every political idea that's it with every cultural idea

we are 100% rewarded in what we think and then people say shit out loud and then it becomes like a crazy story. Yes. Yeah. Honestly, I think that's what happened to a lot of folks with Riyadh is that like there was a lot of comics that were in that like stage before pop culture and they got their

first experience of like internet backlash because they're like. Like Jessica Kershon. Jessica who's fucking hilarious. Hilarious. Like literally hilarious. I've had her on a bunch of times. The lover. Lesbian.

Very funny. Jewish. Super nice person. Apparently crushed out there. Yeah. I heard you got a standing ovation. Crushed. Yeah.

Okay. And like, to me, I'm like, I've maybe made a different view of these things. It's like, I think that, like, Western culture is so addictive. Like, once you get a taste of this shit, like, this is what you want. And I think there's a version of looking at this thing where, like, in 10 years later, they go, yeah, we need to, we need to have more of this. And we need to have more people making fun of us. And we need have more people making fun of themselves. And this is beautiful, like, cultural exchange.

That maybe that's, like, looking through rose color glasses, but that's how I look at these things. Yeah. And I'm going. And then she's like, she's experiencing that backlash because she never has. And I think she goes, I toiled in obscurity for decades, being hilarious but not having a fan base. I finally got one. And then you feel that internet backlash. You think that's real.

And you're like, oh, my God, I'm going to lose everything that I've always dreamed. I need to address this. When in reality, if you put your head down for two weeks. Goes away. Nobody will care. Yeah. There's a tennis story. That's Chris Rock's quote.

What does he say? I've heard somebody say something similar with that. He says. I thought you told me that, actually. I thought you said, like, I just don't look at my phone. Well, I don't. I don't, but Chris's take on it was wait two weeks before you respond to anything.

Yeah. And most likely to blow away. If it's still around after two weeks, then address it. Make a comedy special about it. Yeah, he went in a year. He stude. He stude on that shit. He kind of milked it in the best way

because if you think about it, he got to tour that thing for a year and everybody was showing up to those shows because they're like, oh, I need to say. But people were filming it, though. That was the problem. Some people pulled out their fucking phone to ruin the fun yeah but i get why he's like i might as well tour this shit i'm not gonna just

address it right now let's go 100% also cook it like make sure that bit is fucking you got the right seasoning in there you get that fucking thing over the stove make that sunday sauce baby let's go make that ragu let's go yeah it's a it's a it's a weird time for comedy man it's a fun time for comedy arie shafir said it best what he said he said comedy's dangerous again yeah this is Ari loves. He loves chaos. That silly motherfucker. He loves when things go side. I love chaos too, but not that much.

He likes when the city burns down because he'll put out a backpack and go to Asia. Yeah, he gets to just dip. He really dips. He's dipped right now. I don't know where he is. He's hiding somewhere in the world. He'll dip for like three, four months. He throws his phone away. He ruins our text message thread

because we've got to protect our parks. He turned their whole thing green. So I opened up a new text message thread that's called Fuck Ari. So it's just me and Norman and Jane. It's like he's a legit wild boy, but he said it right. He said comedy's dangerous again.

And it is dangerous. But it's only dangerous if you let it be. Like for people like Jessica, I wish she'd talked to me. I would have said, don't listen to anybody. Don't read the comments. Fuck those people. What you're doing is the Lakota people had a term

called a Hayoka. and a Hayoka was a special member of society that made fun of everybody. It was an important part of their culture. He made fun of the chief. He made fun of the chief's wife. He made fun of everyone. And the idea was if you couldn't mock something

that it was bullshit. And so he was stress testing all of these different things. So it was called a sacred clown. That was their definition of what a Hayoka is. This is like built into American culture. American culture specifically. It's like why I want. Trump to do the, what's that little, like, a news dinner?

Yeah, White House Press. Correspondence dinner. It's like, why I want him to do it because, look, we have a relationship with government in America that from its inception is antagonistic. Yes. Right? Like, we fought the war because we're like, you don't get to tell us what to do. And then we set up systems of government that basically stopped one person from telling

us what to do. And then we have this great thing where once a year, the guy who's in charge, the most powerful guy gets humbled in front of all of us and it's this beautiful thing that is like uniquely American. I know there's somebody right now is in France. We've been doing this forever. Shut the fuck up. It to me it's uniquely us. It's our thing. And I love the idea of like humbling our heroes. It's why roasts work. It's by seeing like Tom Brady, whoever it was like on the roast and the more powerful, the more successful, the more that they've got. We like that kind of humbling because we have that antagonistic relationship

with the people in charge or even our heroes. It's a beautiful fucking thing and afterwards we kind of embrace those people even more. We appreciate that you were taken to your knees if you will in that moment. Did you ever see when Jeff Ross in Comedy Central they roasted Trump?

Yeah, yeah, I've seen obviously clips from me. He had a conversation with Trump. He said, hey, when they're going after you, just laugh, you got to laugh, you got a smile. If they look over at you and you've got a serious look on your face, it's not good. He's like, okay. Yeah, you're right.

They realized. He was like, yeah, you got to laugh at off. You got to let it go. You got to let it go. And, you know, that's the White House press correspondence in it. You got to be able to let it go. Let it go. Let it rip.

Make fun of them. Make fun of everybody. Make fun of the press corps. But it's this beautiful, humbling thing. But the thing about Trump is like the White House press correspondence thing is literally why he became president in the first place. Yeah, I remember that. When Obama was like, here's one thing that I am that you'll never be,

president of the United States. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, if that's how it works, Trump will never have free health care. You'll never do that, I promise you. You'll never stop every war.

Right, that's what you have to do. You have to challenge them. But yeah, I just, I think those things are really important. I just think they're important, like, cultural institutions for us specifically. It doesn't work the same in other places that don't have that kind of antagonistic relationship with government. Right. There are places that they just do not have it. Like, they actually have, like, a really grateful and appreciative relationship.

Or their government doesn't have any free speech law, like England. Like, what England's going through right now is crazy. That's the thing I was trying to tell people is, like, when people keep talking about free speech, it's like, stop acting like that's the norm. We're the unique ones. Yes. In Canada, they don't have free speech. They have free freedom of expression or something like that. Yeah, but it's carved out with, like, certain things like hate crimes or hate speech.

I mean hate speech is weird because it's very subjective who defines it was hate exactly right so it's like and I remember when them truckers were protesting they were freezing the accounts like there's just yeah it's just a uniquely you know American thing which is amazing and we need to like protect it at all cost 100% and we need to protect it and propagate it through the world and that's why we should get upset when England starts cracking down on free speech because that's a disease and if that's a disease and if that's a disease spreads and if England falls and all of a sudden England is essentially a totalitarian dictatorship if they're a totalitarian dictatorship we're in real fucking trouble man I don't think we are but I get what that I get that logic like I get this idea

that like things are trendy no we aren't right now no I mean like even I hear what you're saying like and trends do build steam and then people ask for it and they see other things working I get that like I think that makes sense like functionally in the world you know what I mean but like my shit is like I care about American free speech that's

what I go for. I'm an American. I want us to be all good. If the other countries want to get on board with it, all right, get on board with it. That'd be great. The problem is they bring that shit over here. Just like when people... Keep that shit over there. Let me tell you something. In the night, like, 2015, 16, when I started talking shit about college campuses, people like, what are you worried about these kids on college campuses with these Marxist ideas?

I was like, they're going to graduate. Like, I'm a person who sees like where things are moving, which is why I got out of California so early. I was like, I see where this is going. You've got to get the fuck out now. This is not good. And I'm like, they're going to get out of this school. They're going to start working for corporations. And it's going to flood the country with these nonsensical ideas.

They're going to be positions of power? 100%. 100%. And like these corporations are going to bend to whatever makes them the most money. Right, which is why it's dangerous if England goes. If England goes, if England completely falls, like, they just pass the digital or they're trying to force the digital ID on people and they have arrested 12,000 people for social media post and some of them are just critical about the amount of immigration that's coming in and they're putting them in jail for this.

Yeah. So if that is a trend and that starts spreading through Europe and they lock those people down because those people don't have guns. They don't have free speech laws. They don't have any of the things that protect us. Yeah. So you're worried about them in terms of it becoming a trend and then impacting us. Exactly. Because if it becomes a trend for the entire world and we're the only, and they're like the problem, the consequences of free speech is an unsafe society. We have to protect the marginalized groups. You know how that ends? That ends with a military dictatorship and all those people that help them get into play, all those leftists, they all get killed because they're the people that are going to resist the government having this kind

of tyrannical power that they helped them get in the first place. That's what Castro did. That's what they all do. They use the leftists to get into positions of power and then once they take over, they kill everybody. Fuck you. Okay, that's a fair argument that you're bringing out how it could impact us. It's a wolf with a grandma outfit on. Yeah, yeah. That's what it is.

Yeah, it's big mama's house. Yeah, it's... Tyler Perry presents. Marxism for Americans. But no, I hear that because I guess my initial thing on initially was like, yo, if you guys want free speech, fight for it. Like, we fought for it. Like, people shed blood for it.

They constantly are fighting for it, nonstop. You guys go fight for it. Vote those people out first. Don't fucking... No, no, no, I don't mean... That's one of the problem is, like, saying that. I know if I say that, then they'll think. I meant more like America, like, as a nation state has constantly fought to maintain this thing

and went through incredibly difficult times to do it because it's like a core tenant to our belief and our identity. And if other countries want that, they have to put in that same effort through politics. I'm not saying go be violent. Right, right, right, right. But the way we fought for it was like, we fought for it. We banged out. It's like, yeah. Banged out.

It got rough. But we're wild boys. That's why I'm not worried about like in, like we are the collection of the craziest people on the planet. Bro, England used to be the wildest motherfuckers on Earth. One island took over most of the world. And now they're just arguing with wigs on. Like, what the fuck happened?

Do you know what? Like, does this happen every country? Do you see the guy with a wig that sentenced the guy to, 20 months of custodial service Because he was complaining about immigrants Have you seen that video? No But it is the craziest video

Because it's 2025 or 24 And it's a guy wearing a wig Who's sentencing a guy for a 20-month sentence Who just made a post criticizing immigrants Yeah Well what was he saying about the immigrants Well he was talking about these gangs Of guys are coming in from the places

They bombed the fuck out of Because that's the real problem be upset at all. Yeah. Why would they be worried about it? Listen, you got to listen to this guy. See if you can find that video with that guy. Because it's him wearing the wig is so crazy.

Yeah. And while he's saying something that's so insane in the age of the internet and it's on TikTok. Bro, this is like, oh, I don't care what they cut out of it. Like, just him saying it, I don't care what context it is. He's reading off the guy's tweets and then saying, because of what you said, I have, have no choice but to sentence you to jail yeah people to participate in attacks on a hotel housing asylum seekers comments that encouraged was over comments that encouraged every man their dog should be smashing the fuck at a Britannia hotel uh the judge quotes one

of his parlor posts responding to the user who said if i'm down if you are lad so that he was starting oh so he was inciting violence yeah i mean Don't tell people to go hurt people. Your motivation became clear when you informed the police here promoted the idea of attacking the Britannia hotels, a result of angered, frustration, immigration problems in the country. So what was his post, though? Oh, this is it?

You want to say that you do not want your money going to immigrants who rape our kids and get priority. The judge later said the overall effect of your post was to incite violence toward the building and therefore towards those in the hotel. It was not only the refugees and asylum seekers who were likely to be affected by your post, but also the hotel managers,

the night porters and those who worked within the hotel that's actually reasonable that in that case i see what you're saying um i don't yeah so incitement to violence is illegal even in america right like it's like it's a different thing than just freedom of speech yeah so that's that is different yeah you shouldn't tell people to hurt people the guy wearing the wig yeah it makes it look insane it's like what what what what like you have to have a special outfit for me to take you seriously because if you're just like a regular guy yeah and you're saying uh you're you're saying uh you're you were inciting violence. And then the guy go, yeah, but do you know what the people in that hotel did?

Yeah. But let me tell you what they've done. Let me tell you those, those cats, they've raped your underage girls, they're grooming gangs, they live there, they're getting priority, they're getting paid our money, they're on the dole. Like, you could even have a conversation. Yeah. This guy's yelling out to the abyss on parlor.

Yeah. Because he doesn't know where else to go. Yeah. And this guy's go, well, the solution to that is I put you in a cage. Yeah. Look at those on his wig. Put the, put the thing on so you can hear this. of the tax us hard-working people earn when it could be put to better use.

Come over here with no work visa, no trade to their name, and sit down and doce, and then there's more people being put out homeless each year. They get top-band priority on housing. You went on to say that you did not want your money going to implement. immigrants who, quote, rape our kids and get priority, end quote. Although you said that you had no intention of carrying out any act of violence, there can be no doubt that you were inciting others to do so. Otherwise, why post the comment?

You expressed remorse, but by that time it was too late. For the offence of publishing written material, in order to stir up racial hatred, there are sentencing guidelines which I must and will follow. The maximum sentence is seven years' imprisonment. In my judgment, this comes close to harm category one. However, for the purposes of this sentence, I will treat you as falling into category two, since there was no. direct encouragement towards activity which threatens or endangers life. However, you fall towards the top of Category 2. For a Category 2 a offense, the starting point is two years imprisonment with a range between one and four years custody. In

mitigation, I take into account your plea of guilty for which you will receive full credit of one-third following your earlier admissions. I take account of the contents of the references from your mother, friend and employer. These can only be of limited value in the current circumstances, as can the contents of the pre-sentence report. I take account, too, of your expression of remorse, your lack of convictions which are racially aggravated. As is recognized on your behalf, this offense is so serious that an immediate custodial sentence is unavoidable. The sentence that I pass has been reduced by one-third to reflect your guilty plea. The sentence is one of 20 months' imprisonment.

In response to... This is tricky because the guy did incite violence, but... Yeah. You shouldn't be doing it. You know, you should have, you shouldn't be doing it. I think a lot of people are very naive of what the impact of a post, if they're an anonymous person. Yeah. You know, they're very naive of how that's going to be perceived.

And, you know, they're just venting like they would be venting at the barbershop, right? If they're hanging out the barbershop, like, fuck those people. Someone should go over there and kick their ass. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. People are looking for, people also looking for community.

They're looking to feel, like, validated in there. beliefs like it also pretty it is pretty wild that these people are coming over to europe and even to america as a direct result of military campaigns so that that's the other thing i found so funny is that like they're not going over there because where they live is awesome and like there's reasons why it's not awesome and there needs to be a little accountability for that like i heard even like british comedians they were like you know shitting on uh you know doing the the Saudi or even like shows in the Middle East and they're like, they employ people at slave wages, et cetera, build it.

And it's just like, guys, I wonder what happened. I wonder what country did something to India back in the day that created a scenario where those people might have to leave their country to get a job to afford to provide food for their whole families back in India. I wonder what country might have plundered India and stripped it of all of its wealth. for fucking, I don't even know how long, that created this scenario. Like, you can't just remove yourself from that.

Have you ever read that book about that one corporation? Yeah, what is it? The, uh, that basically the, that turned India into a country, like a factory, essentially. Yeah, literally. Well, what was it? Was that not a... God, I forget the name of it. I read the book a while ago.

I saw like a YouTube video on this. Well, I should say I listened to it. I listened to the book a while ago. I can't remember the name of the corporation. Jamie, you got to hold this down. It is a crazy story. story, though, and that's England. So you guys, your ancestor did it.

You know, the chickens have come home to roost. Yeah, it doesn't mean that you have to be okay with it. But you have to at least be understanding of, like, how this scenario was created. Yeah. Yeah. But it's also, clearly they're letting them in. And they're letting them in. And the thing is like, oh, we've got to do something to stop this violence.

Now we have Rise of East India Company. That's it. The Anarchy. The relentless rise of the East India Company. Crazy book. Oh, dude. And it's all real. Like what fucking Leopold did to the Congo?

Oh, God. It's like 25 million people that were killed. Oh, God. Yeah. The Congo thing is nuts, man, because a bunch of these settlers thought that they were going to live in the Congo and they set up these beautiful mansions. And the forest just swallowed it up. Yeah, it's amazing. Yeah.

Just let them know you're not welcome. One of the truly wild places in the world. There are still images of these places, these like Elizabethan, is that the type of architecture that are just completely sweet. swallowed by the jungle. And what's crazy is the wildest part of the world is where we need to go to get the minerals to make the batteries in your cell phone. Maybe that's why it's the wildest?

No, no, no, it was always wild. It's wild because it's like inhospitable. I mean, they have the largest chimpanzees in the world there. They have those Bondo apes there in the Congo. Yeah. This place called Beely. Okay. They have this one subset of chimpanzees that's really large.

And they call them lion killers. They have two different types of chimps that the locals describe tree beaters and lion killers the lion killers they sleep on the ground like gorillas they don't give a fuck they don't have to hide in trees they're like come get me bitch they're like six foot tall

upright chimpanzees like you know that Michael Crichton book Congo you ever no no he they made a movie Crichton is Jurassic Park yes Crichton made a movie is kind of a goofy movie about the Congo and the Congo in the movie there's these like gray

chimpanzees that are huge and obviously that's not real but that's what they're based on It's based on this one subset of chimpanzees that actually has a crest on its skull like a gorilla. So, you know, gorillas have such large mandible because all they eat is vegetables that they have this. This is the Michael Crichton movie. It was kind of goofy. Look at these big silly gorillas.

Oh, wow. And they fucked this dude up. They look so bad. Oh, wow. But the book is a lot better. But in reality, there's a thing called a Bondo ape. And there's a, I guess, is a Swedish or Swedish. wildlife photographer named Carl Armand who became obsessed with this animal and started

catching it in camera traps and there was photos of these guys that see if you can find the photo of the guys at the airport where they shot one so these guys look at these guys but that's not it no no no the one above it no no yeah that it that's it look at the size of that fucking thing look at the size of that thing it's like a gorilla-sized chimpanzee and there's different photos of them on camera traps where they're... Holy shit. No, that's a... That's an orangutan, I think.

No. Or a gorilla. But they have video these things now. They know that they're a subset of chimpanzees. That's not a really big one. That looks like it's just a big chimp. But the idea is that this place is like rugged. I mean, this

is leopards and it's scary. There's a lot of rugged places. I just feel like when there's a place that's resource rich there's going to be a lot of conflict around oh well that's the amazon too yeah same kind of situation like really wild pristine jungle and then people are hacking it down because they're they want to make cattle farms and you know log but like isn't it to the best interests of the parties that are invested in the resources there for there not to be social cohesion like it's easier to manage if everybody's fighting because if there is social cohesion you have a situation like

what is it rhodesia which just basically goes hey we're going to going to be a great country, by the way, and we're going to take back our mining rights, and we're going to make sure that we own our resources, and then we're going to educate our people, and we're going to have high GDP. Like, there's a pretty amazing story that's tied into it. And they're like, okay, well, we can't let that happen in the Congo. We've got to keep this shit a little bit chaotic. Yes.

Because aren't there like, especially with the battery stuff, aren't there like only nine different mines for that? And like China owns seven or something. Something like that. I don't know how many mines there are, but China owns a bunch of them. And, you know, that's a Siddharth Kara, wrote a book on it. He came in, and he got undercover footage that shows these people with babies on their back, pulling cobalt out of the ground with, like, a mask over their face, like a bandana,

to protect themselves from the toxic fumes. I'm performing there next week. Bye! I look forward to David Cross's blog about it. My favorite posts, the people who are not invited and don't have to even go. I really wouldn't. He probably wouldn't. David probably wouldn't, you know.

We'll see. There's a thing. We'll see. Yeah, I remember when David Cross wrote a letter to Larry the cable guy. He was shitting on Larry the cable guy and like an open letter. And at the like the bottom of the post, it was like from New York City. He signed it like from New York City. I saw him getting upset that Norman farted on his podcast.

The Mark Norman farted. Yeah, and like telling him that a fart isn't funny. And once I see you do that I'm just like, what are you been talking about? Well, for the norman is funny, period. Yeah. So if he's funny and he also farts, okay, who cares? Well, also, farts are funny.

And Norman said it, he's like, that wasn't a joke. That was not funny. And the normans says, a sound came out of my butt. That's always funny. It's funny when a baby does it. It's funny when an adult does it. It is the funny. What are we fucking talking about here?

Like, obviously. It's funny. It's funny because you're like, oh, no. And then he just dropped the N-word on the podcast. and not Norman Cross. And then Norman's like, you're going to cut that out? He's like, no, you don't have to cut it out. It has the AH.

And it's like, oh, well, thank you, white guy. You tell us what N-words were allowed to say. Yeah, you can tell us where the comedians are not allowed to perform, but you tell the black community what N-words you're allowed to say. Yeah. It's kind of hilarious. You know, there's a hard N-word in Bob Dylan's Hurricane. You know a song, The Hurricane about Ruben Carter?

I got a little hurricane story. You want to hear? Really? Yeah. You met that guy? No. My dad interviewed his lawyer. Ruben Carter's lawyer?

Yeah. Really? And his lawyer says, his lawyer says, off the record. My dad goes, yeah. He goes, he did that shit. I probably should have to say it right now, but the lawyer. does my dad He just made it all racial

Yeah, that's hilarious Who knows? Maybe the lawyer's wrong. Or maybe he's right. Maybe he's right. Good song. Didn't they have a movie about it? Yeah. Oh yeah, and in the movie

there's like a really racist cop That's like targeting him through the whole movie And apparently the guy was a total construct Oh really? Yeah, yeah, yeah There wasn't like one cop Who was like really interested He was chasing him

They use it as a vehicle to push the storyline, which I always think is gross when you're doing something about a historical person. Yeah. I think that's gross. Yeah. But if you're going to have an obligation, though. If you're making a movie about a historical person, you can't have a character that moves your plot along that didn't exist.

I mean. Because now you're changing history for a lot of dumbasses who don't read a book. I mean, that's what the people who... Which is most of us. That's what the people who fucking... you know dictate what history is you know i was talking i was talking sort of but they're just doing it to make the movie better yes exactly they're doing it that's their their their responsibility is to make money yeah i was talking to Shane about this and we were just talking

about like like uh ancient histories like I don't fuck with the ancient history and I'm like why not he goes nobody really knows what fucking augustus said to this guy like people just making it up and like writing it down afterwards he's like you really kind of barely even know what happened 50 years ago or like a hundred years ago And I think that's one of the reasons why, if you get into, like, antiquity, it's so interesting because it's just been, like, mythologized. Yeah. So everything is so much more remarkable and amazing, and the people are so much more resilient because they've been retelling the story for 2,000 years. If you want people to listen to that story, you've got to make it interesting.

Yeah. No doubt. Yeah, you've got to make it interesting. And the thing is also you have to remember it, and then you have to tell it to people before anybody even figures out how to write things down. Yeah. So they're saying it for a thousand years. before they even write it down yeah that's my issue with the bible well i think the bible is a historical account of something yeah and i think uh one of the real problems with the bible is as you get older

and older with the bible things get weirder and weirder and weirder so it's like what was the original story like if you get to the dead sea scrolls the dead sea scrolls are bananas and there's stuff in the dead sea scrolls like if you get like uh had rep luna you know anna paulina luna on the podcast, and she was talking to me about the book of Enoch. She goes, you ever read that? But that's not included in the canonized. Here's why. Because of rabbis. A bunch of rabbis said it didn't align with the Torah, and so they yanked

it out. But it's an original biblical text, or at least a part of the original religious text that they found in the sea, in the Dead Sea Scrolls, in Coomron. When they found those clay tablets, the book of Enoch was in there, along with the book of Isaiah. We need to call Wesley Hop. The book of

Inok is nuts. I talked to Wesop about it. That's the Giants one. It's not just the giants. It's aliens. It's about the watchers who came down and mated with human beings. Bro, I'm reading it right now. I know you are. I already know. Bananas.

She told me to read it. And she was like, she's like, you have to read this. It's nuts. And what did Weshoft say? Did he said there's a legitimacy? Yeah, it's 100% of legitimate text. It's legitimate religious text. But they decided not to include it because it's so nuts and because it goes against, like,

the writings of the Torah. Right, right. But it was a few rabbis. Just a few rabbis. Like, if the book of Enoch was included in the Bible, it changes the whole story of the human race. Why would the rabbis decide what goes into the Christian? Because back then they had that kind of power. They just decided that it doesn't get included in the canon.

This is a long time ago. But yeah, I mean, this is like around, well, who decided to canonize Bible, right? This is a like Constantine time, right? Well, that's for the New Testament, right? And so with the Old Testament, you've got to, West Huff would be the guy to ask all these questions. Oh, wait, Enoch was included in the Old Testament. Oh, it's old as fuck. Oh, okay, God, God, God, God.

Not always is it old as fuck. When they found. it, they also found a version of the book of Isaiah. This is one of the things that Wes Huff told me that was really fascinating. They found a version of the book of Isaiah that is verbatim, the same as a version of Isaiah that was a thousand years later, which they thought was the original. Unbelievable. That's what's crazy. For 1,000 years, they maintain the exact same story verbatim, writing it down and passing it on. And the book of Enoch's in there with that. And the book of Enoch is bananas.

Yeah, I think we might need to do a little deep dive on the book of Enoch. The book of Enoch, it says that these watchers came down and made it with human beings and created a race of giants called the Nephilim who consumed and destroyed everything in front of them. Gee, that sounds like people. Yeah. That sounds a lot like people. If you got a bunch of little chimps and then you got these tall aliens and they make a fucking seven foot man. A Viking who's like chopping off heads and lighting villages on fire and has this undesirable, unstoppable desire for conquest. That's humans.

The Nephilim sounds like humans. Exactly. So they're not giants. We are the giants. And then what if the other folks? They might have been giants. Like, it's hard to say. But what if the other folks were the Neanderthals?

Because there was a time where we're living together, right? Right. Well, they were here before us, allegedly. Well, this is the question is like, where did humans come from? Yeah. This is the real question. This is a really interesting show on PBS right now called Human, where this lady goes on this journey of, it's like she's, what is her degree in? Is she an anthropologist?

I believe she's an anthropologist, or maybe some sort of biologist, but she goes over the history of the human species. It's very interesting. The migration from across the Bering Land Bridge into North America, when the oldest people started coming here, where they, how they came here. Fascinating stuff, but that's one of those things. Like, if you think ancient history is filled with horseshit, like ancient human history, like of the humans, that's the woman's name. I don't want to fuck up her name.

Ella Al-Shamahi. And it's on BBC and PBS. Really good shot. I just started watching it. She's a paleontologist, Grean genetics and taxonomy and biodiversity. But they just found. recently a human skull that pushes the date of humans back another 500,000 years. Yeah.

So it's like all they know is what they find in the fossil record, and there's so little fossil record, and then they keep finding new things. Yeah. Like they just found Denisovans in like 2010. What is that? What's this? Total new branch of the human tree. It's called Dennis.

Denisovans. Denisovans. Yeah, they found like a bunch of teeth, I think, in Asia. And they're like, what the fuck is this? So, or maybe it was Russia. So there's that. There's the one that they found in China, the bighead people. Yeah, that's the one I said is.

That's real recent. That's real recent. I forget what that one's called. We've done this a million times, but I always forget. But so they're always finding these new versions of humans. So how many of them really were there? But if there's a bunch of science experiments, if aliens are coming down and I'm like, let's try them where they're short and really powerful and they only eat meat. And that's Neanderthals.

Like, stop, this one's not a good design. This is not a good design. We need them a little more frail so they invent things. Because the brutes don't invent anything. Yeah, more frontal cortex. Yeah, well, the Neanderthals had bigger brains than us. That's what's interesting. So then what part of our brain was specifically different?

See, we have a very... Our idea of them is that they were dumb and they couldn't talk and that they were brutes. But it doesn't seem like that's true. In fact, it seems like they had art, they definitely had tools, and they had language, and they might have been as smart as us. They were just different. And maybe us being a little weaker is what made us smarter, you know? Made us work collectively. Maybe we're a little more alien, just a touch.

Right. There's a little too much salt nuts, stew. Let's add a touch more of us. And, you know, it seems like the hairy, you know, five foot seven, two hundred pound fucking savages with big eyes that might be. might be able to see at night because it looks like they might have had night vision. They have huge eyeballs, man. The Neanderthal eye sockets way bigger than ours. Their skulls thicker, their bones are more dense.

They might have had night vision, like a dog. You know how dogs, their eyes glow when the headlights hit them? They might have had that same ability. Hmm. I mean, yeah, I don't know why. That design's too, that design's too sketchy. It's just not working. They can see at night and then they go hunting other people.

This is too much. But then we hunted them. Maybe. We might have just fucked them. I also heard we fucked him. You had that joke, right? You're like, I got a little bit of, yeah. One more time with the monkey.

But in terms of like the stories, like, all right, you know what a comic gets off stage and like they think they killed but they bombed? Right. Like there could be people telling those stories in the books. There could be. Like, meaning what their rendition of what happens. is in the book and that is what they truly believed happen they might not even be delusional

I mean they are delusional but like that's what they saw and that's what happened to them and history is always written by the winners exactly yeah my version of the Bible story back in the day I used to have this bit about Noah's Ark I was like the problem with the Bible

is people are full of shit and that story sucks yeah like it's that simple it's like people lie all the time I've never met any politician or any person who's in charge of anything that's, like, really important that I would say never lies.

So if you were back then where there's zero accountability, zero video, zero anything, they can't even write. Well, that's where the cross-referencing makes sense, right? It's like, that's when you've got a bunch of different people

saying the same thing or similar things. You start to go, okay, maybe this did happen. But I don't know. There's something, there is something about it. You know, like, every time I go to church

and, like, whatever, something about the music, I get, like, emotional. And I've tried to, like, reflect on and I understand, like, what it is. I don't know if it's, like, seeing people submit to this power that's greater than them. There's just, like, I get this really emotional about it. I don't know what the hell it is.

Well, it's a combined shared experience that you're having with all the people that are in that building, too. Yeah. There's something to that. And I'm just, like, watching, yeah. Like, maybe it's, like, maybe I'm a little cynical and skeptical, and, like, I can get caught up in the raw emotion. emotion of submitting to something that you cannot control and maybe there's a part of me that

that really kind of envies that and wants to in the same way that like but because you have a lot of control I don't know if I have any but like no you do you have a lot of discipline and a person yes yeah but a person who like yourself there's a lot of discipline and a lot of work ethic that doesn't come without control over yourself yes and you want to submit and give into something sometimes and there's something beautiful in that and like seeing people do it so willingly like I get fucking emotional it's yeah it's and uh yeah i i've thought about a lot i don't know what it is but it happens almost every time and it's specifically with the music yeah well i think music is a very powerful thing i mean that's when we were playing what up gangsta i mean come on man we're like we're both

on a drug dude there's a your whole body starts moving you're like oh come on i was talking to this guy he's a photographer for um f1 he's been doing for like 30 years and uh he you know he's been to he literally takes off one race a year to go to, like, this music festival. He just loves music. And, like, I asked him if he saw Oasis, because, you know, Oasis is back. And you're a fan of Oasis?

Yeah, love them. And what's so interesting is happening, like, with Oasis specifically is, right now we don't live in, like, the monoculture anymore. You know, like, there's a thousand different silos and everybody thinks that, like, the thing happening in their world

is the most important thing. There's no, like, universal new rock star. Like, Justin Bieber might have been, like, the last person that was, like, a musician that everybody knows. There's a K-pop band that none of us can name the guys. Right. They're the biggest band in the world.

Exactly. But like back in the day, especially when we were growing up, there were bands that were just Metallica, like performing in Russia, you know, like these things were just kind of, there was a monoculture. And then the internet has divided that, and that just is what it is. But what's kind of interesting is, I feel like people are, the people who did experience monoculture, they're going back to these, like, nostalgic events. It's like why existing IP movies are the only movies that work, right?

It's like they want to feel those moments when we all were experiencing the same thing at the same time. And like I'm seeing these like Oasis clips. Like all my boys, I was on a show of all my boys went to go see Oasis. And like there's a really interesting thing. The lead singer, I guess,

is it Noel or Liam is the lead singer? I'm such like a casual. Doesn't matter. Like he's just wearing a track suit. Like he's just wearing like fucking like the most thing. And like to me, I'm like that's the most rock star shit. Wearing the big flamboyant thing was rock star when everybody was wearing suits

but now that everybody is big fly boy just showing up in a fucking hoodie to your fucking stadium show it just lets you know like I'll do whatever I'm gonna be the day and we're gonna throw it back to you 100,000 people at the same time waving

yeah I don't know I like oh my god what I saw that will for real were that good damn so what do we have to do cut that part out yeah let's cut that part we were just singing an oasis song unfortunately you can't hear it because of tyranny tyranny fascism but it's

i don't know like i love comics throwing out that word too that's a funny one throwing out fascism nobody even knows what that fucking word means that's the most annoying thing nobody knows the definition of that shit there's a few people online that are like political uh debaters that know the definition of that word but what it is is like you're bad that's it yeah you're just it yeah you're just You're bad. You're an asshole. I'm going to call you an asshole politically. These are bad.

Yeah. And I want to sound smart when I'm calling you an asshole. I disagree with the things that you're doing. So I'm going to use this word that neither of us really know the definition of. Because if you call me a fascist, I can't really say I'm not because I don't know what the fuck that shit is. Well, that's the problem with things like Antifa. Well, of course you're anti-fascist. Yeah.

It's a pretty good thing. Yeah. It's like the Patriot Act. Oh, we all? Patriot. Take my rights. Of course I'm a patriot. Take away my rights.

It's like every time a politician Like pushes a bill That's like the don't hurt women bill Yes You know But all it is is like tax incentives For some group And that's why Trump is so ridiculous

The big beautiful bill It's like everything is marked Like why you're gonna be too big It's beautiful It's big But that's the That's the political game man It's a stupid fucking game

It is a stupid game To base your entire personality And identity about That is the weird part and people do yeah oh it's everything people do and they're they're in a life or death struggle every four years like settle down because it's a zero-sum game power is a zero-sum game yeah right it's just like if i think that this person is going to completely change my life and complete strip me of everything i have anybody that supports that person and that person are completely evil right

and then once you think someone's evil you can do anything to them right well the people that have an argument about that are Mexican immigrants, especially the children of Mexican immigrants who maybe their family, maybe they're illegal because they were born here, but their parents aren't and they realize their parents might get kicked out. Like, that's scary. It's fucked up. That's scary. Yeah, I don't like the ice stuff at all.

It's not just bad. It's bad for them. And I don't know how they don't realize that this is the worst look ever. It's also a bad look for ice. Yeah. Like, ice itself is a very important institution. Yeah. Like you want to make sure that you have a government program that can enforce the borders and also like remove people that are here illegally especially people that are doing criminal activity like this is an institution that we shouldn't malign. This is one that we should be proud of. This is a good thing. But then when every video coming out is like seeing these people being like torn their families and all this kind of stuff, it's like yeah, you're going to have a lot of animosity towards these groups. I know we're having this conversation right now. There's already people getting a video going to well this is what you guys wanted. This is like no one of the things I actually

talk to Trump about is like how can we not do this like what can we do how do we have these people living here for fucking 10 years they're paying taxes like why don't we give them a pathway to citizenship and I specifically was like you own hotels you've employed these people right you know they're good people right like if you like we're entertainers like we work in fucking restaurants you know what I mean like we know we work with these people and you see them grinding like I don't know yeah that's a very frustrating thing I think their problem with it is multifaceted but I think one of the issues is the way the census works.

Because the way the census works, you get congressional seats based on the amount of people that live in an area, regardless of whether or not those people are citizens. So, yeah, and that nuts? So if you have import, so like I say if you import... How do you prove that they're there then if they're illegal? Because you get... The census doesn't check to see your legality. It just counts the number of people that live in a residence. But how do you count it?

Like, they have to fill the census out, right? Why would they fill it out if they're here illegally? Um, that's a good question, but it's, they know. They know based on employment. They know it's like there's a bunch of different, uh, points of, uh, of data that they get it from. That's a good question. But the point is, it doesn't matter if they're illegal. So if you fill out a sentence and you're illegal, it doesn't matter. It's, it just matters how many people are in this area. And that dictates how many congressional seats you get. So there's a political advantage. Also, if you encourage these people to fill out the census because it's politically beneficial. to your party, right? Especially if you help those people get in. So if you invited them into this country, actually flew them out to that place, put them up in hotels, that kind of deal, then you can get more congressional seats because you have more human beings. So that's the argument. Like a lot of people chalk it up to, they're giving these people voting rights. And it's like, no, that's not what's happening. They're actually increasing the amount of representatives you could have in a certain

district. They are. But then we went over this yesterday in Tim Walsh's state in Minnesota. They actually passed a law where they give them driver's licenses and they could use those driver's licenses to vote it's not legal but someone could break the law and do it with those driver's license the problem is they know that some people have

there definitely have been instances where illegal aliens have voted for whatever election so the question is did they move them there for congressional seats did they move them there for cheap labor did they move them there because

if they pay for these people and give them ABT cards and then eventually they devise a pathway to citizenship, if they get like a Democrat in in four years, we have to take care of our community regardless of whether you, if you're a good person, a hardworking person, we want you to join Team America. And that's how I feel. That's how I feel. And so then all of a sudden those people who you gave EBT cards, put them up in the Roosevelt now those people are voting right and obviously they're going to vote for the people

who have protected them and i wouldn't blame them for that at all especially now this is why it's politically dangerous for the republicans because this support of ice and seeing that that you just lost the whole latino base right yeah except the hardcore cubans so don't go to fuck yeah yeah yeah you're like we ain't voting democrat that was the joke i had it's like the second they put their foot on dry land they're like we got to stop this immigration this is this is too much guy this is too much. Especially from communist countries. Get the fuck out of here with those ideas. 100%. They've experienced

communism and that's why they embrace materialism. Cubans love Cuban links. Big ass gold chains to let a motherfucker know I got some cheddar. Right? Because in their country you get what they give you and that's it. I heard a good quote. You know

Carlos Slim is? You've heard of Carlos Slim. He's like a telecommunication magnet. He's like, well, he's got in Mexico but they all over the world. He's like, you know, super billionaire. And apparently, you know, this is a secondhand, but like he's this guy who, I don't know what he looks like, but I'm aware of his name. He's incredibly powerful, incredibly successful. What a great name. Carlos, amazing, right? And it sounds like a pool player, right?

It sounds like he's related to iceberg. The guy who wrote the, I know well. He wrote a book on Pippin. That book is terrifying. Like, I was like, how do I make sure these guys don't meet my wife you know what i'm like it's fucking horrified that book but um but yeah he had an interesting thing about like i'm always impressed by these guys who have all this power but they don't want any of the limelight like i don't know what he looks like but i know in the name and i know he's involved in everything yeah and uh apparently he said something like um even billionaires can be new to money implying that like a lot of the guys that we see we hear the guys that are all over the place like they're new to this and they're new to this and they

on some level want it to be known that they got it. Right. And the people who've maybe done it for, you know, legacy generations, they're like, you actually get yourself in more trouble the more people know. Oh, for sure. Right? But it's hard to like be broke and then get some money and not want to flex it. Well, even if you don't want to flex it, if you just have it,

like if you're Jeff Bezos, you're out in the middle of the Caribbean, you know, with Lauren Sanchez chilling on a yacht, there's someone with a drone taking photos of you. You also do your wedding in Venice. Like, you want to flex it. That was flexing. You want to flexing. That was her, I bet. Yeah.

She was like, I want a big. Oh, wait. You don't think Jeff wanted to do his second wedding in Venice? With a bunch of celebrities. Invite every famous person on Earth. The Kardashian show up. You met three times. Yeah.

Illarious. But that's what happens, bro. So the wedding is the wife's party. Right. And you kind of got to go, too. You're like, damn, we got a good. Oh, I thought you're talking about Jeff going to his own wedding. Oh, yeah, that too.

Yeah. Do I have to go? This feels like your thing. Are you sure I have to do it? I have to support you in this venture. Yeah. Yeah. Like if you get invited to that and you're like one of their fucking friends, you're like, oh, great.

Yeah. Fly to Venice and be a part of the zoo. See, that's how you, that's like, that's how like kind of we would feel about it. But there are certain people who are like, I think they almost define themselves by those invitations. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. For what? I think I define myself being able to miss the wedding. well there's also a thing that we actually make stuff ourselves rather than have to get hired to go make us stuff you know like you'll do a movie occasionally if you want to but you make your own comedy you make your own podcast you make your own stuff when you're an actor and you don't make your own stuff and you've got to appear in other people's stuff there's a whole different layer of bullshit that you have to dance with there's a reliance yeah there's a reliance yeah there's a reliance

And then there's also like a currency of being current, you know, and you have hot. Yep, yep, yep, you got to be a part of that. Yeah, and that's when, you know, one of the things you see about comics that lash out of people, it's a good example of this, is like, once you've got no currency, that's when you start lashing out. Yeah. Because you've got to get attention some way. Yeah. And you're not getting it through your art. So what's the way to get it?

You have to figure out some way to be current. So find out what is current. and then shit all over it and get the people who think Elon's a fuck with he's a fuck wit yeah get those people and they're like yeah

fuck Schultz yeah fuck Rogan fuck everybody but yeah I mean that's the that's got to be the worst thing is like

to be a comic that only gets attention when you talk about comedy right like you want to get attention from your jokes you want people to like you for the funny things you said

you want to have a really interesting point that nobody else thought of yeah hilarious or something fucking stupid and silly that's hilarious like that's what we love right and like that's what you actually really want but like when the only reason anybody's talking about you is because you're shitting on your colleagues right like that's what's bothering you in the world but I think I think that's what happened with just the whole like what's happening right now with the comedy economy it's like I think people are feeling I think I think young

comics are probably feeling a little bit like concerned that they don't know the way forward right they also don't know whether or not they're being forced to participate paid in these pylons or whether they should back off. And then they get pressure and they don't know what to do. I got young guys and young women a lot more slack than I do the O'Gs, these people that have been around for a long time. You should know what it's like to be attacked and you should know that this is not fair. It's not cool.

And you also should, if you have an opinion on what these people are doing with whatever, whether it's Riyadh or have some kind of compassion. for these people as human beings and as colleagues and be charitable. Be charitable. That's what I try to do. I try to be very charitable

when I talk about anybody that I'm not like in a like a real serious like a Mark Maren type thing with. That guy I'm like, fuck you. You're a problem. But he made his bed. Yeah, he made his, well, he made his bed

and the Theo thing just really drove me crazy because Theo is the sweetest fucking human being. I love him to death. You think that Maren wants to be talking about another comedian? Like, do you think that... The thing is that's...

You remember what comics would all they talk about is like airline seats and travel? It's because that's all they knew because they were on the road every weekend. Because that's all they think about. That's all he thinks about is other people doing better than him. So that's what he wants to attack.

Where's your thoughts on Gaza? Oh, I haven't heard him say anything about that one. Kind of weird. Yeah. There was some crazy... The actual official tally is like $60,000. people dead but they it's going to be more than that oh there's Stephen Dossinger uh had a thing on

his page where there's some human rights group that estimates it to be as high as 400,000 yeah because I don't think they count missing as dead yet no I mean there's no way they know you look at all that rubble and bro okay so there's that but then there's also what Hamas is doing right now yeah in in Gaza which is crazy these executions and tortures of people that they think collaborated with Israel yeah Horific. Horific. Me and Tommy Segura have a text thread that we go back and forth with literally the worst shit we find every day.

It's like a trauma thread. And I sent him one. Tom just needs to feel something, huh? Tom just needs to feel. He just needs to feel. That's why I sent him these things. You've got to show him the worst shit ever. He's like, all right.

I am human. Yeah, I sent him one. He was like, that one was rough. I'm like, yeah, yeah, yeah. They were breaking this guy's bones with boulder. They had this guy blindfolded and he was sitting down and they took this enormous rock and threw it on his shin

and snapped his shin in half and this guy screaming and then they take his arm and they stretch his arm out and this guy hits it with his giant bat and crushes his arm It's horrific. It is so crazy what they're doing and they're doing it on Samsung 4K video

on a cell phone And kids can see it. Anybody can see it My kids saw the Charlie Kirk assassination That's bro You know it's like I didn't want to see it and then someone sent it to me i think tom sent it to me actually yeah and i'm like all right let me see and i watch i was like oh god but that's yeah that's the that's the that's the tricky thing right now is because i think that like as far as we've been comedians there's been like a clear

path of how to make it it didn't mean that it was accessible to everybody but like when you're growing up i'm sure it's like get an HBO special when i'm coming up it was HBO and then it transitioned to come on the joe rogan podcast and that was the thing and Did it mean every single comedian that came on here became a millionaire? No. But a lot fucking did. You got a look. You got a look and you got an audience that was interested and curious and like

If you were legit, if you were Shane Gillis, if you were you were Ari Shafir, whatever it was, you popped off. Hundreds of people, right? And we saw it like instantaneously. It was like, you come on and then your podcast would go number one afterwards. Like you remember this, right? And it was like, okay, so then comics were like, okay, wow, there's a pathway forward. and then like the clip economy and the YouTube specials and these things start happen and then people are like okay I do that that's how I go poppin then kill Tony

erupts and it's like oh shit if I can get a spot on kill Tony then I can make it yeah and I think that like now people are going okay I might not be the right fit for kill Tony because the character based things really explode more than like say a traditional comic it's like okay I don't do that it's like I don't know how I can even get on Joe and if I do get on Joe can I be on enough for the audience we'll see it I put a YouTube special out, but like it seems like there's hundreds of YouTube specials out. So it's like, I don't know if that's going to be the thing that breaks me. So I think that the younger comics are kind of experiencing this thing where they're like,

I don't know the pathway forward. And someone's going to invent some shit. Someone's going to do the thing that I did that you did where you just try something new and then it catches on and fucking that dominates what it is. But like, I think they're in this period where they're like, I don't know what to do. And when you don't know what to do and you're not where you want to be, that's where I think the bitterness starts to come back. Well, you also don't know what the path forward is and if it's ever going to arrive for you or if you're just going to be like on the outside forever.

So you're to toiling an obscurity and then you're just and then you start to feel resentful. Then you start to feel angry. Before you might feel resentful and angry, but you're like, you know what? There might be a chance. Joe could see me. He'll bring me on his podcast and then I could have all this fucking success. And it's like, so I do empathize with that like anger, but the knee-jerk reaction to just shit on everything and try to shit on the scene and like shit on Austin. or like shit on these things.

I don't think they realize that that's not going to get them any closer. It will get them like immediate attention. A bunch of their comedian friends around them we're going to click and like and do these things. But it's not going to be that long-term sustained career. You don't build a fan base by going, I don't like that place.

You also alienate the newest scene in the world. You alienate people who actually help you. This is the thing. You're making a fake version of what the scene is too. But that, I mean, that's the internet, right? That's the crazy thing. It's like you have to say, You have to have an N-word joke

You have to have you know You have to go on and have a trans joke And this is just the same thing It's beat you know the problem is It's a walled garden Austin is a walled garden Like if you're on the outside You see all these people having so much fun in the garden

You're like I can't even I'm not even in there Fuck those people It's not it's not but it's an appearance of a walled garden Exactly and then I think that there's like people On another level up We were saying earlier that are like seeing These like people talk shit about it And they're getting concerned that it could like

negatively impact them in a way. So they're doing this like, it's the most pussy shit. They're like trying to create a little distance. Not too much where they can't call you and say, hey, I got a pocket. Oh, you mean, Andrew Santino?

Yeah, like not too much where it's like, oh, I'd like to come on your pot, but I'll have a guy who's going to shit on you for the whole fucking episode and not give you pushback. It's like, and it's not just him. Like, I've seen other people do it. And it's just like, dude, dude,

you're going to go through some cancel shit later, all these guys. They're going to go through some later. And they had a guy that they could call that would bring them on the biggest platform in the world and let them explain themselves have their back like you will do it i would still do that with santino of course you would that's your boy that's your boy i love him he's a fucking amazing hang that was a bad move that was a bad move in my opinion he felt like look mark is irrelevant

he's yelling these things out like let him rant everyone's going to know what he's doing but i don't think everybody in the outside they don't because they don't know comedy they don't and it looks like you're co-sying at all and it looks like that you're okay with this and they i'm fine with you having him on like I would have Marin on but we're gonna go at it like Akash calls him out he's just like come on you pussy let's talk you ain't shit yeah so it's like it's like but it's like yeah but also defend your boy and that's also important because at at a baseline people don't want to see people abandon their friends at like a baseline human thing right even if you got your friends back when he's going through some shit even if you disagree with that person

did like baseline human you go yeah I kind of would want that guy as a friend. There was a video of Trump on Letterman when, I think it's Letterman, I'm pretty sure it's Letterman, Trump when Mike Tyson got convicted. And, bro, it was like the most unpopular opinion in the world because I think his attorneys were terrible. They had the worst defense I've ever heard in my life. This girl came up to his room at 1 a.m.

They said she was dancing a few hours later. She was hanging out with people, having a good time. She came over, took off her panty shield in his bathroom. And she'd also accused someone of rape that wasn't, it was unjustly accused of rape before that. She had done it before. She had done the same thing before. You know, I don't know what the fuck happened there. Obviously, I don't.

But that was his boy, and he defended his boy. He said, look, we don't know. We don't know what happened. And he said it on Letterman. I respect that shit. And he was like, whoa. And a lot of people in the comments did, too. Like, wow.

And Tyson got his back. You know that. Yes, always has. It's also decades later. Always has. Yeah, it's a different, I don't, to me, I'm like, I thought this is normal. Like, I thought this is. Because you're a man.

I don't know. That's the thing. There's a lot of these people that are like a salamander that's never gone through its final developmental changes. And they're stuck in like an adolescent stage of evolution forever. Yeah. There's men that are like that. But that are, you know.

I don't know. And maybe it's because I know guys like you and like Charlemagne who like, I see them going through shit and I see people like will try to like get me to talk to it's like it ain't gonna happen yeah like I know these people as human beings you know a 30 second TikTok of them so if you want to have that conversation we're gonna have it but like you're not gonna like the way it goes because these people are my friends like real friends right not like colleagues there are people who were colleagues with right but like my real friends you guys write my wedding right and you've been in my way like my wedding wasn't like a comedy hangout right

it was people who I am close to you know what I mean like by the way it's one of the only weddings I've ever been and I respected that took a COVID test took a COVID test you were so upset about it too you're like here bitch you're like I'm free of it bitch I was already over well that I don't even know if I had been

the beginning of being cancelled about the COVID stuff I was like it was just starting yeah can I pee real quick yeah yeah let's pee we're back we're back when Tony got into it the first one with the Asian thing when he got into that.

People didn't know the, he was totally, not always he set up, people don't know the full context of it. This guy did this whole set of like, it was like real bad comedy and it was, why do you hate Asians? Everybody hates Asians. And so Tony gets up and makes fun of them for being Chinese afterwards.

They take that, they run with it. Tony fortunately had a video of that guy's set and released it along with his full set. Well, you see, this is just what he does. He's just fucking around. And then he kills. He kills for the entire set. And he released that.

And then the cancellation basically died off. But when he was going through it, man, I was really worried about him, like genuinely worried about him. He thought his life was over. He had never experienced anything like that before. And then I took him with me to Salt Lake City. And it was only, God, I guess a week and a half. He took off one weekend.

We did a show in Houston. And he's like, I just, I don't think I can. Go on stage. I'll just take this weekend off. I'm going to pay you anyway. I go, I'll pay you. Just relax. And then we'll do Salt Lake City. Right. I just just just I know you're going through it. Just so then he went on stage one night at the Vulcan. He's like, dude, I think I could do. I'm back. I'm back. And so then people didn't know that he was going to be with me in Salt Lake City. So we're in the back of the room and I announce the opening act. And I said, ladies and gentlemen, one of my best friends, Tony, Hanchcliff. And they went, yeah, they stood up. arms raised like fuck yeah it was part of it was because I was supporting him he was going through it was public it was in the middle of everything and he went up and destroyed the love that he got from those people and then he went and just ran with it and he had material on it he was already talking about it and it says it was beautiful but it was beautiful to watch him realize like oh I'm going to be okay the internet is not reality right And he had that moment in real time. But he also had you having his back. Like that's the, and I think people see that also. Like, I think there's people in the crowd to see that.

And I think on a primal level, they go, man, if I got caught up in some fuck shit, I would really like it if my friend had my back. Yeah. If people were saying things about me that my friends know were false and they use their platforms to talk or, you know, put me on or whatever it is, I think deep down viscerally they go, oh, that's a good guy. You got to try to, like, help. people, you know, I tried to get Steve Renazizi on when that 9-11 stuff happened, and he decided to go on Stern instead. Yeah.

And I was like, okay, but I'm telling you, if I have you on, I can navigate it a little more compassionately. But I don't think at the time he understood where podcasts were versus where Stern was at the time. Stern was still stern in his eyes, but it wasn't stern in terms of, like, to reach. Yeah. And even if it was, he's not going to handle you the same way I'm going to handle you. Yeah. Like, I'm going to give you all the room in the world to express yourself and I'm going to be as charitable as possible. And I'm going to put myself in a position where I could imagine if I made up a story and then I got stuck with it.

Like, oh, no. You know, and what is the way forward with that? Well, I guess the way forward, he eventually had to address it and talk about it on stage and, you know. But you can help people. It really does work. If you have a platform and someone's going through something, you really can save their world. You can.

Especially if you show that you have support and you love them and you talk about it and talk about what a great person they are. Like Tony's one of my favorite people ever. Tony's great, man. And he has this massive thing. And naturally, we want to pick at the people that are incredibly successful.

It's just like human nature fucking Taylor Swift gets it. You know what I mean? Bro, here's the thing. Kill Tony wasn't that big back then. No, no, no, back then. I'm saying even now. Yeah, but now, well, the thing is the second cancellation, like after he did the-

Puerto Rico thing, he was already ready. He was like, I've been through this fucking storm before. I'm just going to tie down these sales and ride this motherfucker out. But if he hadn't been through that, that would have been even more devastating because then you're getting canceled by CNN. New York Times and you know they had stories pre-written ready to go blaming the loss of Trump on Tony Hinchcliffe and then the Latino vote went up he's 15% he said Tony said the first night he slept was the night that I endorsed Trump for real yeah and he literally said dude that was the first night he goes I think it's going to be okay now wow which is crazy because that's part of the reasons why I did it probably yeah yeah it's like We're going to get Tony out of here. We've got to protect Tony. Yeah.

If Trump doesn't get away. You didn't even need to. The Puerto Ricans were like, we got this. Well, Puerto Ricans take a joke better than anybody on the planet. That is a great shit-talking community. They talk shit to each other. Especially in New York. They're not going to be censored by anything.

Now, what I would have told Zoni and what I said to him is, like, I wish you had told me like what the set is because, like, New Yorkers have this idea of Puerto Rico as this, like, beautiful Caribbean island. It's like our first vacation in New York when we go to a fancy place. It's Puerto Rico. So I think when he was connecting it to the island of garbage, which I knew where he's going. There was like an island of garbage floating in the... Pacific.

Yeah. Atlantic? No, it's the Pacific. Right. So it was actually, he was bringing it to something that was a popular story like a year or two ago. But New Yorkers don't know what the fuck is floating. You know what I mean? Like, we're just like, yo, Puerto Rico's...

So I think that they were just like, oh, that was weird. We don't see Puerto Rico in that way. Well, not necessary because that joke. murders when he did it at Madison Square Garden when he's opening from me. Oh, really? Fucking murdered. Okay, fair enough.

Murdered. Because it's just a joke. The thing is, it's just a joke. But it's also, Puerto Rico, if you don't know, has a massive garbage problem. Oh, I didn't know. Because they have a landfill issue because they don't have much land.

It's like all these fucking tourists come over there with their fucking water bottles. And they got a huge hole in the ground that's overflowing with trash. At the end of the day, it's a fucking joke. It's a joke. It's a joke. done there.

That's the thing. If he was running that joke by me, I'd be like, no. That's not the one. That's what I'm saying. That's not the one. That's not the one. That's not the one. I told him not to do it, period.

Yeah. I was like, there's no upside to this. Yeah. This is a, it's not going to be a comedy crowd. And meanwhile, he goes on after some guy has got this crazy. We've got to take back Americanals. That's the thing. Even doing comedy in that environment is like the trickiest thing.

And like, I do think like in general, like us just having politicians on and like even going to the rally. It's like, I think what's happened is that we've politicized ourselves and like we've brought ourselves into the game of politics, which is the ugliest game. Yeah.

Like, it is the ugliest game. Because it's that zero sum shit we were saying earlier. It's just like, this is, people really believe it's life or death. Uh-huh. Dude, I was pushing my daughter in a stroller, right?

And a lady goes, hey, this is in New York. She goes, hey, didn't you have Trump on your podcast? And I was like, I already know what's going. I'm like, yeah, yeah, he was on a podcast. And she's like,

well I hope your daughter has a good life I'm like bitch you live in Tribeca you know what do you think is happening over here your husband works for fucking Goldman you know what do you think he's voting for but like that type of vitriolic hate to a stranger on the street what did you say to her I said

I go I go oh do you have a daughter because she just looked lonely and I really wanted her to be like no and then I was just going to lower the fucking boom. And then she was like, yeah, I have two. And I was like, okay, well, I hope they have good lives. Ha ha ha ha.

She out crowdworked me. Yeah. I was like, show like, I was like in shock. Like, I'm like with, like, there's a, I'm with a child. Like, why are you talking to me in the street? Like, I saw a video of a lady getting out of a cyber truck in New Jersey and some woman yelled out, are you fucking racist? You racist?

She's like, what? Yeah. Somebody just gave me a ride It was an Uber No, she got a ride from somebody He had a cyber truck She got out of the car And, you know

And some lady started calling her a racist Out of nowhere There's insane people Oh yeah There's like and they've always been here And they've always been here And they're even more rooted in their insanity Because it's rewarded

Every time they go on their phone Yes Like their crazy opinions are just like Yeah you're right about that opinion Here's evidence 30 seconds at a time And they're dumb so they don't realize what it's doing to them.

So they're on that fucking shit all day long, getting aggravated. And they're desperate for community. Their whole identity is this community. God forbid they have a dissenting opinion. All of a sudden, that community is going to ostracize them. It's literally what happened to, like, Ezra. Like, Ezra's actually trying to have real conversations.

Like, he believes in what Democrats can do and think that they're the best for government. And he's like, how can we make this happen? And then there are people that would be, like, his biggest supporters. The second, he moves a little bit away, it's, I can't believe he's turning into a right-wing grifter. They're calling Ezra Klein a right-wing grifter. Yeah. Or Elon Musk, a fuck-wit.

Yeah, it's the same thing. You're never going to make everybody happy. And as your profile increases, the number of ignorant people that are paying attention and commenting on you increases. Yes. It is, and so it's just numbers. Yeah, it's like the percentage doesn't change, but the amount changes. Drastically.

Because you have so many more people watching. Well, especially if there's an event. Like, if you had Trump on the podcast, that's the event, and then ignorant people just start yapping out their opinion. And I want them to have opinions. I think it's a beautiful thing. I'll never tell anybody not to say anything. But, like, the funniest thing about the Trump pot is that, like, initially it was

Kamala's campaign and the Democrats, like, loving the interview. Because Trump said that thing. It was a really fascinating thing that happened because both sides were going, oh, this is awesome. And I was like, holy shit. What did he say? He goes, he says one of the funny things ever. He goes, he goes, I'm basically an honest person.

And then he says it to me and I just laugh because I'm like, that's, I laugh for a few reasons. Like, one, I laugh because it's a hilarious thing to say. It's very funny. But two, it's like actually the most honest thing to say. Like if I'm deconstructing it, it's like anybody who goes, I've never told a lie. You're like, you're a fucking liar. You just told one. But saying you're basically.

basically honest is like, yeah, I pretty much mostly tell the truth. Yeah. You know, sometimes I say Melania looks skinnier than she does. You know, whatever the fuck. Whatever it is. You know what it? But like, it's, I don't know. It was just the funniest thing. Or the Epstein files is a hoax. Bro, the fucking Epstein thing is just, nothing but a hoax. It's just, it's just, I don't even understand. I don't get it. I don't get it. It's, it is the easiest political victory. Like, if you, if you just do it. It is, but it isn't. Here's the thing. Yeah. I'm not supporting anything. Just be really clear, ladies and gentlemen.

But if you are, if you have relationships with all these insanely wealthy people that are going to be severely impacted by this, like this is the ultimate political football. Because I don't know what the numbers are. I don't know who the people are. But I've heard things. And if those things are true, you're dealing with some of the most powerful people in the world, some of the wealthiest people in the world. They got to go down.

Yeah, well, it depends on what they did, right? It's like, did you go over there and have sex with a 24-year-old and do Coke? Or did you go- Totally fine. Right. Or did you go over there? But here's- You want that out? I would want that out.

If I was attached- You wouldn't want that out because, like, how do you, you're connected to pedophilia. No matter what. Oh, right. Because you're like, she was 24 and then someone's going to go, well, did you idea? And you're like, well, no, I didn't idea her. But did you see underage girls? Were you there?

Are you complicit? So you don't want to even be around it. Right. Well, you can't be around it. I mean, the guy 100% had sexual relationships with underage girls, at least in Florida. Convicted. And convicted. Yeah.

And so that, and you knew that when you were meeting him. That's the Bill Gates thing. That's the craziest. Not only Bill Gates, the Stephanopolis guy. Like a bunch of them went over there. A lot of people went over there. A lot of scientists went over there. And I think those guys thought they were going over there for this beautiful place where you can go.

this guy's donating money to science you're hanging out with movie stars this intellectual discourse so tell me about string theory well it's really fascinating one things we've learned and you're having cocktails like this place is great and then you can get your dick sucked it's like a ditty party for nerds exactly and a lot of people went to those parties

yeah I don't want to say Asan Amad's joke what is that? I don't want to say a joke I don't want to ruin his joke shout of Asan man Asson's great he's got a great joke that compares it to Diddy he's filming a special soon too Yes, he is. I'm very excited for him, man.

This weekend. Oh, really? So this coming up. This upcoming weekend at the mothership. No, no, it's at the Black Rabbit. Black Rabbit. So make sure you guys go check that out. He is great.

And that guy works hard. I've known him since he was a doorman at the comedy store. Yeah. Him and Derek do the solid show together. Yep. Yep. So I got to know Asan. No, Assan's great, man.

They have a great pod, man. Super smart, dude, too. But yeah, that's a very interesting guy. Great Green Room hang. That's, yeah. That's the other thing. It's like, uh, just being able to hang just being able to fucking hang is like people think about like oh

what are all these competitive advantages that how do you do that the other it's just like can you fucking hang out right can you sit down on a couch and can we bust balls are we fun it's that easy yeah are you fun are you easy do are you a happy person yeah good to get along with yeah that makes it so easy yeah it's like it's like it's like simple things that you learn in high school you know there's have you ever experienced where like there's a guy who's a fun hang and you haven't seen him on stage yet, and you're like, I hope he's funny. Yes. Because I like hanging with you.

Oh, there was some bad examples of that at the comedy store where I saw someone set and I was like, oh, no, I can't be friends with you. Like, this is too. Fitzsimmons and I were laughing about that once. We saw this person go on stage and then afterwards we went into the back parking lot and Greg's like, well, I can't be friends with them anymore. Greg cracks me the fuck up, dude. Is Greg from Boston?

He's a Boston guy, right? We started out together. Like within a week of each other I've been friends with that dude for like 35 fucking years Maybe more Yeah Greg is Greg's still in L.A. right? Yes, unfortunately

Dude Greg was there when I fucking I did some like I did some it was like a halfway house show Or something like that I don't know I was just at the store and they just asked me He was like do you want to pop on this one And it was like Greg was Joey

And I was like yeah sure I'll go do it And I did it and I was doing these like I did some downsets syndrome but it was kind of like long to be honest with you oh that was you hear this story down syndrome group i had no clue because they told me half house so i was like oh it's guys who were like drug acts alcoholics yeah and i did like a long bit about it and what didn't grow great like everything was kind of good up until that moment and then it kind of went south and i was like oh that was weird and i and i get on stage and joe he's like waiting there or gregg i forget

which was like what the hell are you doing and i was like i don't know like i thought it was going well and then it just kind of tank he's like yeah because it's all of them they're out there No, this is like a charity show or a benefit for it. It's like, you've got to let me know that. Yeah, you should let people know that. I had a very similar thing happened. I had a bit about how, like, there's certain words that are offensive, but wouldn't it be better if instead of, like, banning these words,

if, like, the government issued, like, retard tags, like, hunting tags, like, you get five a year. He just got to know when to use them, you know? And these people were just... This is fascism. government quotas? It wasn't even a quota. But I would be like, you do not want to go outside on December 31st with all the retard tags are going

because everybody's got three extra retard tags. We got to use them. Can't let these things go to waste. They don't roll over. But I did it there and people are like, oh, I was like, what? What's wrong? And then afterwards they told me, I was like, how about a heads up? Wait, you did it also?

Yes. How many of these benefits are they doing at the comedy store? It takes a lot of money. That's fair enough. You know. Yeah. It's an education thing. But I fucked up, too.

Same thing. And then I was like, oh, why didn't you tell me? I felt something in the... I felt it. Bro, I felt it. It was like, it just went south. And the look was like, does he not know? I think they thought that I didn't...

I don't think they thought I was being edgy. They thought you didn't know. They were like, oh, he doesn't know. Right, right, right. You know? And so they're like, they have a sour. Like, oh, no, he doesn't know. It's like if somebody was talking to someone in the crowd before and everybody knows about that person.

And then you're doing something completely unrelated and they're like, oh yeah he doesn't know that like she just lost her husband yeah i'm just doing my five minute widow bit yeah but that's the fun stuff yeah that's what that's what that's what charlemagne loves he's just so he's like at his core he's like a real like comedian at his core like to the point like he'll love bomb he like watching people bomb he like really likes that he think it's i think it's like a full emotion to him and uh so at the end of the the show in rehab we brought alex media who's on the show and he had to do one joke in front of everybody and like the joke is pretty good is a black dude and he's like you know it's cool to be here you know i'll be honest like i see these

outfits and uh it's the only time i'm surrounded by guys in uh in white sheets that i don't feel like they're gonna kill me something like that like some little cutesy joke and then uh charlemagne goes nah bro like they're treating you like the autistic kid that gets going in the fourth quarter the ball boy for that joke wasn't it bro he's like uh-uh-uh they think that you have autism and they're giving you a shot at the end of the season uh that's funny that's funny yeah he's a funny dude there's a lot of funny people that don't get into comedy it's interesting i've known quite a few that are like man you're really a comedian and you never really got after it you know there's a bunch of people like that i used to work for a guy was a private investigator yeah was the funniest

fucking dude I had ever been around in my life. And I was trying to be a comedian at the time. I was an open micer. I was 21. And his name was Dick Dolan. Dave Dolan rather. He'd call himself Dynamite Dickless Dave Dolan. That was his name. He's like, whenever I have a mess.

I have a phone that I kept. It's an iPhone like 10 or some shit like that. And I kept that phone just because I have a voicemail on there from him before he died. He's like, Joe Rogan, it's Dynamite Dickless Dave Dolan. how you doing buddy and like he was just a funny fucking dude he was hilarious and I would

we would catch mostly people that were doing insurance fraud oh he was a private investigator and I worked for him and the way I worked for him yeah yeah I was looking for a job and different things to do to make money while I was doing stand-up and he had this ad for it was a private investigator investigator's assistant I was like ooh that's sounds exciting really what it was is he lost his license drunk driving and he needed someone to drive his car around because he still had to work and so I met him and he was friend or his cousin was Bill Downs who owned the comedy connection so he was relate like we just we hit it no it was in Boston at the

time oh and then it eventually went to Fanio Hall and then now it's the Wilbur Theater but that was oh wow Bill Blumen Wright eventually bought it from them but Bill Downs and Paul Barclay were the original owners of the comedy connection. And so I, and I was like, how are you not a comedian? Like, you're the funniest fucking guy I know. He was, he's not interested. He was just funny. But he would, like, we would, like, catch people doing stuff.

Most of it was, like, insurance fraud. But we'd have to, like, wait for them in front of their house at, like, 4 o'clock in the morning for them to get up and have, like, a fake job. Yeah. Where they were, like, pretend to be disabled. Oh, I've hurt my back at work, but really they were roofing somewhere, and we would catch them. And so we would be just in the car, just me and him. And we would just talk a shit.

And I would be crying. And I remember I was dating this girl, and I went over her place afterwards. I was like, this guy is so much funnier than me. And he has no desire to be a comedian. It's like, it's weird. Like he's a natural comic. Just funny all the time. You know, I don't give a fuck.

I'm never getting married. You know, he's like, he was cheating on his girlfriends, didn't care. He let them know. He's like, I'm not, I'm not changing. He acted like a drunk even when he was sober. Yeah, yeah. Even when he was sober, he was like, he kept that whole, we're on a bender mentality. He just was sober.

And rode that bitch right into the rocks, rode that fucking boat right into the shore. God bless him. And then died. God bless him. Yeah, he was a fun dude, man. Like one of the most fun people I've ever been friends with. in my life some of the most naturally funny people i think aren't comedians yes a lot in the hang and it's a different like when you got to do it on stage there's different expectations and it changes

thing but like just in the hang yeah they're just they're almost like unaware of they're funny right they're not even trying to make you laugh right you know it's just kind of yeah it's like effortless to them and some of them you know that do try to do comedy like that never figure out how to translate it which is really weird i think i think it's a it's almost too easy for them in conversation so they don't do the work to transition it to stage. Or they have this idea of what they're supposed

to be on stage and it's very different than what they are with their friends. That's the first thing I tell young comics that ask for advice. I just go, how are you funniest around the people you're most comfortable with? Like, are you telling stories? Are you self-deprecating? Are you kind of roasting? Like, the people you're most comfortable with, how are you funny?

And that, I think, is like, the easiest way to access, like, your voice or whatever we call it and then just add 10 years of trying to figure that out yeah but like you're right some people like try to put on a cadence of what they think a stand-up will talk about and it's normal in the beginning like you're just trying to figure the shit out you sound like a tell exactly like in new york everybody sound like a tell like when i was coming up atel was even the way that they would do act out sounds it was all versions of a tell and like naturally you're going to

gravitate to the best guy right and what he's doing and i'm sure like in l-a everybody was trying to be dane or something like that's a bunch of guys who are trying to be chapelle chappelle yeah yeah and It's like, yeah, that makes sense. Patrice would say that your, his babies. He's got a bunch of babies out there. Oh, I mean, I was a baby of Patrice, for sure. Like, I remember seeing him and just going like, oh, my God, this is, this is the highest form. Joey Diaz was the best example of a guy who one day figured it out.

Joey Diaz was the funniest guy in the parking lot. The funniest. The funniest. The funniest. If you were in the back bar, he was the funniest. He was holding court. Everybody was dying. We were falling on the ground laughing.

When he would get on stage. he would try to be a comedian. He would try to, like, set up punchline, tell a joke, I got a little joke for you. And then one day, he gave up. He gave up on being cast in movies. He gave up on the dream of having a sitcom, and he got real fat.

Like, when I first met Joey, he was built like a linebacker. He was a tank, and he was fresh out of jail. You know, it was a different Joey. Jail beef. It was Scary Joey. Yeah. And Scary Joey gave in to Fat Joey,

and then Mitzi Shortstar called him Fat Baby, and that's all she would put him on on the lineup. It wouldn't be Joey Diaz it would be Fat Baby. She wanted to call him Fat Baby. Oh, so he would lean into this. She had this idea

of changing his name to Fat Baby. You know, she named people, right? She named Carlos Mencia. What do you mean? She came up with that name. That's not his real name? No, it's not his real name. His name is Ned.

It's like Ned Holness or something like that. She came up with the idea of him having that name. Yeah. That was part of the whole video of me, like, exposing him. Yeah.

I was like, you're not even Mexican. And the Mexicans in the crowd were like, what? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, he's close. Honduran. Yeah. Yeah, half German, half Honduran. But whatever it is.

It's a bus stop. The thing is Mitsy named him. Yeah. And so Mitzie would name people. Yeah. And she wanted to name Joey, fat baby. And so the old lineups, I got some old lineups from the comedy store, and one of them that says, fat baby.

I love it. I love it. But when he got fat, dude, when he started not giving a fuck and he would go on stage all of a sudden he went from not having good sets you know to kind of maybe it was a pretty good set to destroy liberating destroy he was free yeah he got free and he became the guy on stage that he was in the back it was also around the time where marijuana medical marijuana started like really popping off in l.A so joey was on like 500 milligram sheba choose all day I'm just obliterated, obliterated, and dosing people on his podcast and ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha.

He was just a full-on maniac, and the absolute best guy to take on the road with you. There was no one better. You'd take them on the road with you. You guarantee you were having a party everywhere you go. There's a party at dinner. It's a party hanging out at the hotel afterwards. It's a party. Joey Diaz is there.

We're having fun. And, you know, and you just figured. out how to be that guy on stage and then he became Joey Diaz. But it was like everybody watched it happen like, whoa, I never seen anybody just figure it out like that where like you went from being a four or

a five to a ten. Immediately. To attend where people are lining up in the back of the room going, what the fuck man? Holy shit. Did something happen like, did something happen culturally where what he was doing was refreshing too? Or do you really think

he just changed? He figured it out. He just didn't, he stopped, I stopped giving a fuck. Yeah. I stopped giving a fuck of those fucking people. Yeah. I was worried about those people. You're going to give me a job. I want a job.

I was a fucking convict. Yeah. I had to be careful. Yeah. You know, and then all of a sudden, he's like, these people ain't giving me shit. Fuck these people. Yeah. You know, and it was like right around the time, ironically, that he did the longest yard.

So he started getting movies, started getting all kinds of things. That's what always happens. Because he didn't give a fuck anymore. And all of a sudden he was just so funny. Yeah. That was undeniable. And then when you're undeniable, all those opportunities. opportunities pop up.

That's the other thing. It's like, I think there's, sometimes I hear comics talk about, like, the importance of networking. And I'm like, it's so easy to network when you're funny. Yeah. Like, once you're funny, people want to talk to you. Like, once they admire what you're doing on that stage, they want to hang out. The people that are not funny, now you've got to fucking hang out every single second

and network. But the worst is the networking people that aren't funny that are always trying to get work. And you're like, hey, if I wanted to give you work, I would have. Yeah. Like, you're doing the wrong kind of work. You're doing the network work and not doing the why am I not funny enough work. Yeah. What's missing?

Why don't I have an audience? Like, why do people not want to go see me again? Like, what is that? Yeah. I mean, yeah, they will see you again if you give them a good show. If you give them a good show. But if you don't, there's a lot of comedy out there, kids. There is a lot of comedy out there.

Yeah, I don't know. That's why, like, I'm, like, kind of strict on you just got to give them something new every time you go in. Like, I feel strongly about it because it's like, if they see the same thing twice, and I'm talking about when I'm going out on a tour. To a new, yeah, to a new market that you've been to. Yeah, it's very important.

It's expensive. Yeah. Like, shit is, it's not cheap to go out to a show. Right. Like, so if they're getting a babysitter, they're doing the whole thing, and then they see the thing they saw before, it's like maybe they have a good time,

but there's a little part of them they feel maybe taking advantage of it some way. Well, some of them don't want to see bits again. Like, that's like the hot pockets thing with Gaffigan. But I feel like they want to, see that and a bunch of other stuff yes like if you're giving them 45 of just new heat that they haven't heard before and then at the end you tell the machine story they love it yeah and then you get to live in the nostalgia that you get to take your friend that you told this story to or this

joke it's so funny I hope he does it and then you get to watch them experience it yeah it's like sharing a clip with them on Instagram and just watching them laugh right so you get to experience that but like the whole hour no you got to have something new like we gotta we got to we got to we You got to get, at least for me, I'm like, that is, that's why I take time off. I'm like, I need... Well, that's the difference between comedy and music, right? That's why music is so wild. Music, I don't want your new shit.

Right. Stop with the new songs, Rolling Stones. Imagine Oasis is doing a whole new album. You know what I mean? You could go, here's a new one, but I need to hear the hits. Right. And that, yeah, music just has so much more, like, such a great shelf life. Mm-hmm.

It's just, if a song is high... There's such a self-life, they have cover bands. And we want to watch them? Yeah. Yeah, I remember anytime in LA there was a cover band for What the fuck was it?

It was some 80s cover band? I don't know, they were just playing all these fun little 80s hits and it was a thing that it would like sell out like people would go to one of these venues and they go and they enjoy and they dress up in stupid 80s shit

It became almost like what is that music What is that movie that people would go see in the East Village Rocky Harbour picture show Remember that? You're almost like part of the performance in a way You're leaning into this

This this customization of what's happening Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, I mean, I don't know. It's a different art form, obviously. But that's the beautiful things like something could go down today You know, and then you can go on stage with it tonight And everybody's like, oh shit.

That's, I actually, I almost like don't like it when there's nothing to talk about initially. Right. Like, I would rather, like, the thing. A new thing. We talk about it for at least a minute, and then we're on the same page. Because the first minute of comedy, like, it is an odd thing. I'm on a stage.

You're all sitting. Yeah. I'm going to talk as if we're having a conversation, but you're not really allowed to talk. Right. A minute in, we forget that. Right. You know, it's like you're watching Top Gun or something, and you're like, I'm real. This is real, and I'm in the movie.

But that first minute, but what's great is when there is some sort of controversy or some big news story and like everybody's thinking about it they're going is he going to talk about it like i'm sure anytime you went through something and the first time you hit the stage you can feel them yeah like waiting for you to address it yeah yeah yeah yeah oh that's the best that's the best yeah that's the best well that was tony after you know his cancellation like he went in hot and he can his bits tightened up too because he knew couldn't have any fat no because now people are waiting for you to fail yeah they want you to fall in your face yeah i think that's a good I think that's good to have.

Oh, yeah. You shouldn't get comfy. Oh, yeah, it's real good. You need some haters. Yeah, it's motivation. Yeah. I'm going to make this show so sharp that you're going to have to make, you're going to have to say something else. Or not, or, you know, look stupid.

Yeah, but they're never going to not say something, but they'll be like, oh, but it's this, but it's that. But it's like, you're not going to talk about the thing that we all care about. Yeah, yeah, exactly. There's one thing we all care about, paldle. You're so addicted. I saw your bag. I was like, what's in the bag? I'm going to play with your boy after this.

What are you playing with? Woody Harrelson is like big into it. Oh, yeah, he is. Yeah, yeah, yeah. He loves it. So we're going to go play. I think he's like, you know, building a club out here. What's he building?

A paddle club? Yeah, I think where he's invested in one of the clubs that's going out here. That's amazing. People get upset. It's like golf in that way. Like, people just get obsessed with it. Yeah. Yeah.

You got to pick the things that you get obsessed with, though. You can't have too many of those things. I know because our wives won't allow it. Yeah. Also, life is just, you don't have so much time. Unfortunately, my things take a lot of time. Like, the pool one takes a lot of time. Being in the forest.

Yeah, it takes a lot of time. It takes a week. Yeah. I love when I text you, like, out of the blue, and I just get a picture of you in, like, a foxhole. You just be like this fucking sweaty, grainy pictures. Oh, I sent you a picture of me hunting pigs. Yeah, yeah.

I was in a ground blind. That's it, yeah. I'm in a ground blind right now. Yeah. And you're still talking shit? Yeah. I had cell phone service talking shit

while I was waiting for pigs to come out Where was it? That was in Texas Yeah, that was out of here, man Yeah You need to get rid of them, right? Aren't they like... Oh yeah, they're a real problem

I got a lease Where me and a bunch of buddies Have a lease on this big piece Of hunting land Yeah And we go out there And you know, it's You literally have to kill pigs

And you turn them into sausage And then I give it to my boys I bring it down to the mothership I brought them coolers of elk beet the other night and everybody's like grabbing elk sausage bringing home sending me pictures them cooking it that clip of you and and burr when you gave burr the elk meat i think it was on like a kill tony at the store or something oh yeah yeah yeah does it make you aggressive and then they're just like no no joe you're fucking maniac was wrong with you're so high for him to

be like yes yes Tony said it did I gave him some elk meat and then he went on stage at the fucking trump rally no it was the other night The other night I gave him some, and he's like, dude, I ate it. I got all this energy. I just felt it. It's like a wild... I go, yeah, exactly.

Like, you're eating the essence of a wild forest horse. Yeah. A forest horse that has swords growing out of its head. Yeah. It's got spears growing out of its fucking head. Screaming in the woods. That was the other thing. When you did R-Pod, there was like a compilation of the animal sounds you make,

which is the funniest fucking clip I've ever seen. Like, you were gay... Because we got high. You came in hot. Like, you had the mushrooms rolling. We were smoking. And then you just started talking about bears. And all of us are just, like, open mouth.

They're like, these fucking claws are calling. The wild world is, like, you should be in touch with that. Everybody should be in touch with that. People have a ridiculous idea what the wild world is. A buddy mine sent me a video that his buddy took of he's in Colorado and he's driving down the street. I'll send it to you, Jamie. He's in Colorado driving. driving down the street

and he sees a fucking mountain lion take out a deer right on the side of the fucking highway. I'm going to send this to you, Jamie, right now. This is like... I'm domesticated. Any of these people that, like, oh, mount lions are in part

and they're part of the ecosystem. These are wild monsters that live in the... Do you see the one that I got in the lobby? Do you see the mountain line in the lobby? The big stuffed mountain line. But the one you've always had. No, no, no. The mountain line is new.

The actual mountline. I didn't see it. My friend Adam Green Tree shot it in Colorado. Okay. And it was killing cows, like slaughtering cows on this ranch in Colorado. Like this, look at this. This is the side of, give me some volume on this. Listen to this.

Look at this deer. This mountain lion's got it by the neck. Oh, man. Oh, man. And he's trying to drag his wave free. Oh, he got out. And then this dude helped him with the horn. Every now and then, the good guys win.

Isn't that crazy? But that's on the side of the road in Colorado. Like, that could be a hiker. 100%. 100%. That could be a hiker. It's a little lady, some small lady, some 100-pound lady that's walking around, you know.

Are they the good guys, though? I've thought about that. The mountain lines? No, the deer. No. Like the prey... No, they're food. Yeah, but it's like...

They've evolved to escape these guys, and that's why they're still around. Right. So they have a competitive advantage over the predators or else they just wouldn't exist. No. But I guess what I'm trying to say is like... They don't have an advantage. They're just hard to kill. Okay, they're hard to kill, but they've evolved to be hard to kill.

But they get killed every day. Sure, sure, sure, sure. But like, a lot of times they're going for the weak. They're going for the wounded or going for the babies. Because if you go for, like, the big dogs, it's going to be more difficult. They're going to expend more energy to kill them. Right. But I look at the predators and I'm like, they can't eat grass.

Right. Like, they would love to eat grass. Grass is an easier life. It's everywhere. Unfortunately, they have to go attack these animals that have the swords coming out of their head. Right. So there is a version where I look at it, I'm like, who's really burdened here? Yeah, but the deer don't have the swords coming out of their head to fight off mountain lions.

It's just to... They don't use them for mountain lions. They use them to fight each other. It's just to fuck females. Yeah, it's just a dominance thing so they could show the females that they're the dominant males. They have the biggest racks and they smash racks with other deer. But they don't use it at all as defense against predators? No, not really.

I mean, that's stupid. They're not smart. Yeah. They're wary, but they're not intelligent. They're not like clever. Yeah. You know, mountain lines are clever. Wolves are really clever.

Yeah, I don't fuck with the wolves, man. Wolves are really clever. They have some sort of psychic communication with each other. Oh, you think that? Yeah, they coordinate, and they don't know exactly how they do it, but they figure out traps, well, like, one wolf will come in and they'll have other wolves flank the animals, so the animals start to scatter and the wolves come in from the sides and get them. Coyotes do the same thing. And they'll hunt humans, too, right? They used to.

They used to a lot. I mean, World War I, they actually had a ceasefire between the Russians and the Germans, because the wolves are killing so many people. They decided we have to stop and kill wolves. So they came together, took out the wolves. And then they just started killing. Yeah, because you've got to realize they're in trench warfare, right? So people get shot and they're bleeding and the wolf smell the blood. So the wolves were, they would hear guys getting torn apart in the middle of the night by wolves.

The wolves had made it their way into the foxholes and were just ripping guys apart. Imagine you're lying in a trench and you hear that like 100 yards away. A guy getting alive by wolves. How much you think people knew about war during World War I? Very little, right? I mean, they knew a war existed, but there's no footage, right? There's no photographs. There's just a concept.

And they're just being fed, like, propaganda constantly from, you know, their own countries. I just, I, like, wonder what happens when all those guys come home and they're clearly traumatized. But everybody else has just been consuming the propaganda about just, oh, look what these doing and are fighting for us, and everything is amazing. And we're winning the war and all this positivity that's probably emanating through news. And then these guys come home, and they start sharing, like, the actual stories. Right. Like, ugh. Well, they just come back, shell-shocked.

Like, you ever see Peaky Blinders, that show? Yeah, I watched a couple seasons when I think Cormick McCarthy was directing. No, no. Am I getting that name right? I might be messing up. But, yeah, first. Cormick McCarthy's the author, right? Oh, no, so I'm thinking of a different guy.

Yeah, did he do Angela's ashes? Well, Cormick McCarthy, there's the craziest. Who's the guy who directed in the first? The craziest headline of all time is connected to Cormick McCarthy. I'm going to send Jamie this Look at this headline This is an article from the Atlantic This might be literally

The craziest headline That anyone has ever put in an article before You don't have to pull it up It's just a headline of an article Oh Cormick McCarthy's X Y pulled a gun out of her vagina During an argument about aliens

A little 38 Probably a 22 Yeah, we need to know I need to know what he said about aliens It was probably a little derringer One of them little two shot little tiny pistols You can stick in your cuder To have a gun in your pussy is crazy

They were having an argument Aliens, she's like I'm not here it anymore Enough But why was it in there? But why was it in there? Because they're drunk as fuck. They're probably having a good time.

Most writers, I think, like, especially old-timey writers. Well, Hemingway was a big drunk. I think those people party, like Hunter S. Thompson, craziest of all. I think those people party. Stephen King, when he's in his prime, cocaine, alcohol. All those people that wrote great shit, they were all out of their fucking head. It's a little bit crazier than two, though. She went.

During these change, McCarthy went into her bedroom and emerged wearing lingerie. Her boyfriend probably thought, oh, great. Reconciliation, sex time. Sorry for being skeptical of your out-of-body experience, hun, until McCarthy pulled out of her vagina and proceeded to have intercourse with the gun. I don't know why, intercourse, asking her boyfriend, who's crazy, you or me?

So she's fucking herself with the gun. Yeah, okay. My kind of gal. Yeah. What? Who's crazy, you or me? while you got a gun in your pussy um you got it you got it so she was she was telling him about having some sort of an alien abduction experience he didn't want to believe but he thought she was

crazy so she's like I'll show you yeah you win you win I think you win you win you got abducted yeah I'm not arguing bro she might have yeah she might have I mean imagine you get abducted by aliens and you have to tell people and you're like a person who wants to be taken seriously in all their walks of life. And you have to tell them that they drain your sperm on a spaceship and showed you hybrids. That's why I kind of, I like believe the Lazar dude, like when we went to dinner, he was, he was like shell-shocked a little bit.

100%. Like he was like reluctant. Uh-huh. Do you remember that? Oh, yeah. Oh, that's why I brought you. I was like, come sit with me because it was the first time I'm hanging with this guy. Like I think you and me together would be a fun combination to sit down and talk to Bob Lazar.

And it was just like he was almost like he didn't want to share it in a lot of ways. Yeah. And imagine people think you're a kook for 40 years. Yeah. For 40 years people have been thinking you're out of your fucking mind. You're a liar. You make things up. And then over time, all of a sudden footage starts emerging in like 2017 of these crafts doing exactly what you described, moving in a way that's exactly like what you were saying.

And then there starts getting these. whistleblowers, these David Grushes, and Lou Elizondo say, we have a crash retrieval program. We've had it for a long time. The problem is these defense contractors have access to this stuff. They lied to Congress. There's misappropriation of funds. There's a lot attached to this, and that's why they're not releasing it, which is nuts, if that's true. Yeah. That's why I always say when people ask me, they're like, I would just be like, I believe he believes it. Yeah. I can't say what it is. Obviously, I'm not there. I don't know anything. But like, I don't think he was a what are they called like a charlatan or whatever that word is like i don't think

he's making this up for attention right i don't think so either i believe he believes what he saw something happened he saw something and he was a legitimate propulsons expert and he really did work for los alamos labs which is doing all sorts of wild shit and then he really did work for area s4 like somehow or another he was shipped over there to area 51 site four and he says they have UFOs he said they have like seven of them good he said one of them is really old he said they said it was a part of an archaeological dig here's what's crazy about that i have this guy ben van kirkwick he um has that youtube page called uh uncharted x and he's um yeah yeah great guy yeah they have found through the use of uh ground penetrating radar they found these labyrinths in egypt that are

so fucking huge and underground like deep underground but these massive like corridors that lead into these atriums like Matt and they found a 40 meter long

metallic object that's under the ground in Egypt 40 meters long metallic some unknown metal that's under the ground and it doesn't

whatever it is they know it's metallic it doesn't have any sort of signature that is reminiscent of any other metal that we know about. It was a specific, it was a specific historical site, I think, that they found in Egypt. Herodotus talked about it. What was it called? I think it's called the Labranes. I think that's how it's referred.

But yeah, this is not like a figment of people's imagination. Like, this is something that. Historically documented throughout time for thousands of years. And that Herodotus talked about it being greater than the pyramids of Giza, underground. And so in 1960, Ben was telling us in the 60s they built a dam and, you know, to help the farmers in the area. And unfortunately, it raised the water table. Oh, and it fucked it up and it flooded these labyrinths because otherwise they would have just been able to dig down into it and enter in. And now it's all filled with water.

Is it filled with water or sediment because of the expansion of the water? It's both. And there's sediment, of course, it comes with the water. but there's water, but then below the water table is where the labyrinth. So he's saying there might be a way that they could tunnel from the side past where the water comes in,

but they don't want to admit that it's real. Like all these Egyptologists are kind of freaked out about it. Ozahi? Yeah, I saw that. Yeah, I don't know if that went the way that he thought it was going to go. It went the way I thought it was going to go. Yeah, I know.

Gavin, pay attention. It's not going to go as you see it going. I'm really high on California. California. Yeah. I like how he's like trying to tweet as Trump. Like you don't even have your own style. You're mocking his style to try to tweet. Trump is Trump is kinder than me, bro. He's also making things up like California derangement syndrome. Yeah. No, it's like these are facts. The people are frustrated. Yeah. And they have the right to be frustrated. Don't gaslight your own people. I think that's upsetting. Like if I was from there and I was upset with what was going on and I complained about it and the guy who's in charge says, is, oh, you're just deranged? Yeah, listen, you don't see a similar uprising against Florida. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You don't.

Florida boomed economically during COVID. Yeah. You know, a lot of people moved there. Why? Because they had completely different regulations, and they allowed people to be free. And now DeSantis is even talking about removing property tax, which is a game changer. Because that really is kind of gross. I don't know.

I don't understand any of it. Yeah, me neither. I don't fucking know. But, like, that is tricky, though. Mm-hmm. The idea that, like, you buy a home and then you continually have to pay the government to own your own home. How about even worse? What if you bought a home a long time ago and you paid $20,000 for it in, like, 1940?

Yeah. And now all of a sudden it's worth $2 million. And you have to pay the current level? So you have taxes on $2 million. Oh, it's not based on... Different states have different rules. Okay. But in some states, you have to pay tax on the amount of money your house is worth.

Is it the justification that, like, this is what maintains the streets and this is what maintains the community? Well, the justification is, like, say, if you buy a $2 million dollar home, you should be contributing with your property taxes to schools and all sorts of other things, which totally makes sense. I believe in that, yeah. But the problem is, like, if you're 80 years old and you bought this house for $20,000 and you're on Social Security, and now all of a sudden you owe money on something you already bought to a government does a terrible job of using your money. Yeah. Terrible job, documented, terrible job of spending your money.

Yeah. Yeah, I just, I don't know why he's poking the money. he's poking the, I don't know why he's poking, man. I don't know why he's poking. Also, like, didn't Trump's kid pipe his wife or whatever? His ex. Yeah. Well, I would have tweeted that.

You know, like, that's, I'm more petty than these motherfuckers. You know what I mean? You're not going to talk shit about me and my voice and my kid piped your wife. That's coming out immediately. Why don't you pull my kid's dick out of your wife? That's my immediate tweet. Yeah. Interesting.

It's interesting. I think there's... APEC, I've never thought about it. It is interesting. It's just interesting. It's just... You ran short of word, son. For a guy who's really good at talking,

they brought up APEC, you clammed up right quick. Real fast. I just never thought about it. I thought about JPEC, but not APEC. Like, you never thought about it. Never thought about it. Interesting. Now you can think.

Meanwhile, you just passed some sort of of a anti-semitism thing. Oh, there's another. Yeah, what was the anti-Semitism thing that they just pushed through? No, wait, wait, was it the one about the schools that they then rebuked it? Oh, I don't know.

It was just something, someone was connecting it to. This is why Gavin Newsom, it was a Twitter thing that I was reading. Someone was saying, oh, this is why Gavin Newsom did want to say anything when they were talking about A-PAC. He wants it bad. Like, you can tell he wants it bad.

Yeah. But it's almost like having less time in government is beneficial to becoming president? 100% that's why i think if the democrats have somebody that's really got a shot it's that talarico guy james tallorico i had him on my podcast yeah yeah yeah i think he's legitimate i think he's a real deal like what he what he says he is is what he is yeah very religious person has a really good point when he talks about texas that he's very very wealthy billionaires that are trying to turn the state to theocracy and they want to uh that's why they got the ten

commandments pushed into every school all the public schools here he's like they want to defund public schools and fun religious schools and he's like these people are dangerous this idea is dangerous and like the far right is just as dangerous as the far left and if you're on the right and you don't recognize this kind of this kind of shit is and this is a really religious guy and that's where you trust it even more so actually really believes in it that's pushing back and goes this is against like the values of our country yes he might agree with all those things that they're pushing but he's like I don't think it should be like governmently enforced in schools he's very well versed in the Bible and is literally in seminary right now. Like this is a guy that's very religious, like

legitimately religious and has been his whole life. But that's the thing. You need to shake shit up and you especially need to shake shit up with your own party. I mean, that's what Trump did with Republicans. That's what any candidate that ends up winning does is you have to be like the candidate of rebellion to a certain extent. Like you've even seen what's happened in New York right now. Like you could hate every policy that Mamdani has, but you can't deny that he's at least saying things that tap into the concerns and frustrations of New Yorkers. Right. You left those people out of the conversation.

Exactly. And now the chickens have come home to roost. There it is. So it's like I will not at all, I won't at all criticize him for trying to fix problems that people have when the other guys there are just saying we're not going to do anything. Yeah. I think it was a lot of times the frustrations with the last election. It's just like people were frustrated with Biden.

They just didn't think that he was all there. They didn't know who was running the country. And they didn't like what was happening. And then she came in and she wouldn't separate. herself at all. So that's on you. Like you have to give people, you have to give people hope and oftentimes hope is being the candidate of rebellion and that usually is what ends of winning. Do you see that people ragging on her conversation with Kara Swisher? She was on stage with Kara Swisher and she, even Kara Swisher was kind of like ragging on her a little bit. She was like,

you know, a lot of, some people said that I was the most qualified person to ever run for president. Like, who said that? And Kara's like, some people said that? Like, who said that? You are literally running against a guy who is already president. So if you're going based on your resume, you're not more qualified than Biden. Biden was the vice president of the United States for eight years. Best thing for the Republican Party right now is her book tour. Because every time she talks on camera, there's a reminder as to why she lost. When she went away for a while, I think you could be like you could pretend about what she was and what she stood for.

But the second she does an interview, and she's like, yeah, I couldn't have Pete be my vice president. He's a gay. And then Rachel Maddow was, what do you mean? She's like, no, I'm not exactly saying, but he likes guys. Yeah. You're like, what is going on right now? Right. It's too risky.

It's too risky. Yeah. How dare you say Merry Christmas? How dare you? It's like the same thing, man. Do you see your Columbus Day message to America? What was the Columbus Day? Oh, God.

It was like, don't forget the horrors that the U.S. Europeans did to the... Okay, Jesus Christ. Did he even get here? Scolding. Did he get here or not? Columbus? No.

Did not get here. No. Some people got here. So take that up with the Dominican Republic or whatever. Where he landed. That's what I'm saying. It's like... But it wasn't Columbus necessarily.

I mean, the idea is, I think it's Indigenous People's Day. I think it stopped being Columbus Day after a while. Yeah. And they call it Indigenous People's Day. Which makes sense. Yeah. I mean, like, shot out to them. I think it's funny when governments do these things are like,

enforced care like any time I'm performing in Canada like if it's on like an indigenous area they make you do like a land acknowledgement and I remember the first time they told me I was like you want me to what and they're like yeah we want you to let them know that this used to be native land and I'm like

I remember telling it to like the chief of the tribe and I'm like brother that kind of seems like I'm bragging like I'm going up there and be like yo this used to be yours but the boys came in got y'all to fuck out of here Like, you really want me to go and remind everybody what happened before the comedy show?

You know what my favorite part about that is? It's a land acknowledgement, but also saying, we're not giving it back. That's what I'm saying? We stole it, but it's ours now. So what do we do? Who are we doing this for? Sorry. We're going to acknowledge the fact that we're on stolen land.

But the thing is, these people that go along with that are also the same people that want no borders. And no one's illegal being anywhere. Like Christopher Columbus is the only immigrant they hate. You know, that was There's no borders You know, no one's illegal But yeah, these people shouldn't have been here We let a Spanish-speaking guy into America once

Went great I can't see any problem with that up Ended the Mayan Empire They gave them all fucking diseases Jesus Christ No, it's hilarious So think about what they did what Cortez did to Mexico

I know like my God I know it's nuts yeah fucked up shit yeah it's like yeah human beings did that but also yeah bad the diseases the slaughter also what they did to each other was horrible yeah I mean human beings

do fucked up shit yeah and always have we're here now what are we gonna do now that's my worry so what are we gonna do now it's like it's like you go into the doctor you got lung cancer and the doctor's like let's talk about all them cigarettes you were smoking and it's like why don't we talk about all that chemo you're going to get me like tell me what we're going to do now to get rid of this shit right don't tell me about

what I did I know what I did yeah all right brother go play some fucking paddle this is fun you gotta come this is I gotta get you on a paddle code I can't today I got too much shit to do all right one of these days I'm getting one of these days I'll go out there with you anyway I love you Doug I love you too brother always good to hang always great to yes sir my man yes sir all right bye everybody Peace.