The Joe Rogan Experience - #252 - Jamie Kilstein

Episode Date: August 14, 2012

Joe sits down with Jamie Kilstein.

Joe Rogan Podcast, check it out! That's it. Jamie Kilstein is here, ladies and gentlemen. Showing by day, Joe Rogan Podcast by night, all day! Nothing. What happened there? I don't know. Is this your new fade?

I do it a little different. Your new fade is a non-fade. You just fucking kill it. Yeah. You gotta give up on just trying to outdo yourself, man. There's certain things in life you gotta accept. You gotta accept that you can't make that song any better than it is. I'm mixing it up.

Okay, alright. Can I say something about your sponsors real quick? Sure. If the government were ever to investigate you, your sponsors are evidence that you are trying to start an army for when shit goes down. It's like, yeah, I've never heard a show... I'm used to...

I remember the old... The fleshlights or people advertising condoms or fucking Bud Light. But it's like, you need these to make you strong for when you know what happens. For when the shit goes down and you've got to choke some fucking soldiers. And fucking kettlebells. I've never heard of shit only sponsored by fucking kettlebells. Well, I want to be sponsored by shit I believe in, man, which is also why we have these Alienware computers.

Alienware, we support them because they support MMA fighters they're always sponsoring fighters every UFC show I go to I see dudes with that Alienware logo on and I love that I love that Dell has the balls to to step up and sponsor a very controversial but a very noble sport and so I appreciate that so we use Alienware because of that so I try to keep this show as you know there's you're never going to see Brian and I advertise something that we don't believe in something that sucks like this like even this Alienware thing I would say that if you're like a regular dude and you don't game this is crazy this thing is a fucking brick look

at the size of this goddamn thing it's really huge huge. But if you wanted a game on it, this is the shit. I mean, this thing is just like, you could play high resolution, like really dope high frame rate games. Oh, yeah, you can play 3D. It's like pretty much having the best Xbox, PlayStation 3, and everything in a laptop. But if you're not a gamer, then... It's overkill.

Yeah, it's super overkill. It weighs like 80 pounds. Also, hypothetically, when you're done kettlebelling, it's really good for hacking into the CIA. I don't know if it goes down. And tracing their steps so you can always be one step ahead of them. You need some powerful CPU and some hacker skills, and you need to be able to run Linux. Which we are also sponsored by. We're sponsored by Linux.

We're sponsored by open source. Listen, I believe in open source 100%. I believe in Unix and Linux and all that stuff. But I think that ultimately people want a little bit better of a user experience. They want to be able to go and buy everything. You don't want something where you've got to use Mike's browser. You're like, what is this Mike's browser? You know what I mean?

You see some of the browsers that people use. Right now, dorks are going crazy. You don't know what you're talking about, Rogan! Unix has a wide variety of browsers that are available. I code my own! All the heat is off me now. That's great. The fucking people...

Dude, people have gotten angry at Brian. And here's one of my favorite fucking arguments. A dude was angry at Brian because we were talking about Android phones, and I always look at Android phones, and I look at them and I'm like, ooh, that's a fucking big screen. That looks so pretty. And then Brian was like, yeah, they're still clunky. They're kind of funky. Some guy argued,

you don't even know what you're talking about. Maybe the regular user interface is clunky, but I've hacked into my Droid, and I've used a different, whatever the fuck they called it, I've rooted it, and used a different OS. They hacked the operating

system, changed the way it looks, and they go, see? I have to admit something. This girl I know just got the Samsung Galaxy S3, and I started playing with it, and it's not the design is the shit. It's how it's big and flat, and I started playing with it. And it's not the design is the shit. It's like how it's big and flat.

I just want to have my Apple on it though. So I started using the Apple system. It was kind of cool. There was a lot of cool little fun features like to take a screenshot, you just wipe your whole hand across the screen. I was like, that's kind of cool. Things like that. But then I'm like,

I forget what, I think it was Facebook. I started using Facebook. Let me try your Facebook app. And then it froze. And I was like, that's kind of cool. Things like that. But then, I'm like, I think it was Facebook. I started using Facebook. Let me try your Facebook app. And then it froze. And I was like, ah, fuck this. So let's go to the camera app. So then I'm taking the camera app. I'm trying to take the camera and it's lagging behind. I'm just like, fuck this shit. And then I was like, there it is, right there. It's supposed to be

a really good camera. It's one of the things that's been praised for. Maybe she needed to reboot it. But still, the design of it, I was so fucking jealous about. I need it. It's one of the things that's been praised for. Maybe she needed to reboot it. But still, the design of it, I was so fucking jealous about. I need it. It's gorgeous. I want to hack it. For a browser. That's what I'm looking at it for. I like to get online from an airport or something like that

and look at things real quick. Go to MMA.tv or MixedMartialArts.com or something like that. You can't see shit on an iPhone. It's tiny. You've got to scroll, stretch it out, and shrink it up. If you want to really see a picture, yeah. But on these Galaxies, first of all, the thing is the 4G is just fucking better. It's just better.

The iPhone wants to get silly and say that we're almost like 4G if you have AT&T. It's pretty fucking fast. It's pretty fast. I don't have AT&T, though. I have Verizon. So it's like I'm using old shit. I have a card in my laptop that's a 4G card. It's fucking dope, man. It loads things up like that. It's incredible. It's really good. You can watch YouTube videos with no lag. You start them up and they play, no problem. It's really good. But it just makes me realize how stupid the internet is on my phone. That's one of the big reasons. You just you gotta hack into a better internet bro yeah bro you gotta fucking learn how to get your kernel there's don't say bro that was two characters

they might if they're growing up they're growing past their current stage of nerddom they're experimenting with new words it's sun listen bro bro dude man come bro, dude, man, come on, man. Hacking the system, bro. Hacking the system, bro. You can make your iPhone 4g. Don't be a bitch.

What's really crazy is the Apple TVs. There's a new version of Apple TV. That's now 10 ADP, but the one before it, the seven 20 P you could hack into. And they have the, like this great thing where you just sit there and have like every single movie. That's like, uh,

in the theaters right now. You, it was, it's just like, imagine Apple TV, but if it's like every single movie that's like uh in the theaters right now you it's just like imagine apple tv but if it's like every single movie possible every single you can sit there and watch like direct tv you can watch like ufc you could like you can pretty much watch everything huh and it's pretty badass they had it at this barber shop in atlanta when we were in atlanta last and i was just like what is this and it goes oh it's apple tv so now if you go on ebay or if you go on Amazon.com

and you look at Apple TV, like the new version is like $99 and the old version is like $300 because they're so in because of that hack. Dude, wait until you come back to my place. I've been cleaning out my office, and I found a fucking, an Apple camera. I'm back when Apple made cameras. Yeah, I remember when you bought it.

I was jealous of that camera. I was like, are you, every time I would come to your house, I'm like, are you going to use that? Because they, cause I wanted to get one.

And then they went out, they stopped selling it like the week after you bought it. We should use it and take a, well, we're going to develop a website for this fucking show. Finally, uh, after two years of doing it,

I figured like it should be its own website. And one of the things we could do is take photos with that shit camera. It's shitty. It's terrible. It would be interesting to show people what it helped out. Don't open that shit. You have it in the box brand new. No, I don't have it in the box.

Maybe I did, but not anymore. The box is gone. That shit was awesome. They need to go back to making those. I like these cameras that are in the IMAX. We don't have a camera anymore. The box is gone. That shit was awesome. They need to go back to making those. I like these cameras that are in the iMacs and all that. Nobody wants a camera anymore, though. Everybody wants a camera on your phone. You don't want a camera anymore. Yeah, but like Skyping and all that shit.

So pop FaceTiming on your... I use video all the time on my laptop. How about a fucking camera that can't call anybody? Stupid ass camera. When you're at home, don't you ever FaceTime or video chat with your family? In the house? When you're in a hotel don't you ever FaceTime or video chat with your family? In the house? When you're in a hotel room? Yes.

Well, there you go. But I'm saying that's a phone I'm doing that with. Or I'm doing that with a laptop. That's what I'm saying. Yeah, but it's not like a camera. I'm saying an individual camera on its own can go suck its dick. Oh, right, right. The individual cameras are stupid.

I don't need you anymore. No. I walk by the aisle in Best Buy where they have like little cameras, those little tiny cameras. I'm like, what are you doing with this? Yeah.

What the fuck are you wasting time for? Do you not have a camera on your phone yet? All that shit. No, I mean the... Yeah, but that camera on the phone is still not as good as like... Not quite, but we're going to force it.

We're going to force it to get there. I don't know, man. I mean, like journalists and stuff, when we were covering Occupy, like if you look... If someone stole my phone, I look like a fucking crazy person because the only pictures I have in my phone are cops beating the shit out of protesters. And then you flip it and it's like, oh, there's my Hitler cat and like my fat cat. And it's like my cat's holding. And then you turn it and it's just like a fucking bloody kid like screaming for help and then you turn it and it's like oh pennies in a box like it's fucking my cats and police

brutality is my phone yeah mine is half of them is joey diaz smoking joints that's half the photos on my fucking sounds like the equivalent of my cat photos right it's my kids and joey diaz smoking weed that's half my photos yeah i gotta release those they're very important but i mean a lot of those photos that like uh kids were taking that at occupy were like making it to like mainstream publications just from like iphone like oh for sure solid yeah i mean it's amazing the video i mean some some some of the best like leaked video of occupy came off of phones right and it was uploaded like instantly which is just so fucking badass. What a weird world we live in. Yeah, they don't like that.

But nobody likes it. Have you seen this new video of these cops in L.A. beating the shit out of a homeless guy? I mean, just fucking with him, and then he tries to get away, and they beat the shit out of him with clubs and kicked him. So do you think police brutality has gotten worse, or we're just seeing it more? I think it's gotten better. I think it's gotten better.

I think it's gotten better. I think it was way worse before they were accountable. I think now we're, we're seeing it and they, they realize like, do you know how much that UC Davis cunt bag guy who sprayed pepper in those little children's faces, that piece of shit, do you know how bad he must've felt after that was over yeah what the impact it must have been on his his health right almost as bad as being yeah pepper sprayed oh worse it's it's all these people responding coming back it's worse than did you see the way they protest the they protested the dean it was like the creepiest the silent protest beautiful amazing it was beautiful it's perfect nobody fucked up nobody. Nobody yelled. Explain what they did.

Yeah, so what happened was the dean, who was the one who called the police in, on these protesters, who were peaceful protesters. They weren't doing anything. They were just making a line and doing that whole Constitution thing. It was over money, right? It was over the schools. It was crazy budget cuts. A lot of the schools in California, especially, are,

we don't have time for school because we're not going to tax billionaires. Which, by the way, anyone listening to the show that's like, I'm a small business owner, I'm the 1%. You're not the fucking 1%. Unless you're a fucking, like, billionaire senator. Yeah, somebody tried to tell me that I was a 1%-er. And I was like, come on, dude. You don't even know what that means. You can't say 1%.

That's silly. 1% it's so rare. Those are really rich. Yeah. And they got their money by making you really poor. Right. Yeah. And so, yeah, so the dean was expecting this huge protest because, like, thousands of people showed up.

And what ended up happening when she was leaving, it was, like, dusk, and there were thousands of people. But instead of, you know, screaming and chanting or whatever uh fucking throwing glitter glitter on her uh they were silent it was this parking lot of like thousands of just silent people and she just had to walk to her car in fucking shame like with her head down and just you have thousands of eyes on you and no one's saying anything and you know pull it up pull it up because it's so creepy it's so creepy to watch and listen to yeah this is a better set up the house and so what should I you see Davis what was their official position I think if you just put like silent silent protests yeah yeah well

blue she the president of the UC Davis something well I want to say counselor you mean my description of silence doesn't convey it? No, I'm 45 years old. You're really quiet, guys. I don't know what chancellor means. I don't know what that means. I don't know the difference between a chancellor and dean. Dean, I think you're the mean guy in a movie who eventually taught a lesson.

Yeah, you're the guy that the frat gets back at. Yeah, David Spade is your assistant. Or a David Spade-esque character. Well, it's so sad that at one? That's all that was an original movie. You know Animal House. Oh, yeah. This is it So she steps outside with two other people and there are expect house hands of kids thousands and This all you hear is her walking and that she's surrounded by thousands of kids on their knees thousands candles wouldn't be crazy if they went and just fucking charged her all together at once now would be just as fucked up oh it probably that's the end of the world that would be a more popular movie or

that's your foot yeah that's Day of the Dead. That's what starts the zombie apocalypse. And they're still walking, folks. While she's walking, there are thousands of kids to the left and the right. And I don't know how good the sound is, but I mean, there are times you can hear her shoes. I mean, there are times where you hear sighs. Yeah, the shoes of the photographers chasing her. You could hear her nose whistle. Guess what, folks? If you can force 2,000 people to be on their knees and be quiet like that,

they really believe what the fuck they're doing it for. That's real. It's like in The Simpsons where Lisa breaks up with Ralph and they go, if you rewind it, you can actually hear where his heart breaks. And they do it in slow motion. It's like... That's the saddest sound.

That's some right versus wrong shit right there in pretty clear form so here's a question i have for you i think you'd be a good person to ask about police brutality is there's part of me that thinks so like people really loved the idea of uh tasers and you know even weapons they use that at protests like rubber bullets and stuff like that and even though now it's come out that you know many people died. Many times the people who have been tasered have been the elderly, mentally handicapped people who really did not innocent people, children, people who did not necessarily need to be weren't really a threat.

Right. I mean, there was literally a story recently. We talked about it on the show, but I'm forgetting the details, but like a kid was just like getting suspended or whatever. And a cop was standing there and like, like she tried to run or something like fucking taser,

like children. It was a young kid. Right. Right. So, so my question is, and I think I have my, my answer on what I think is that,

um, part of me thinks that like, and I'm not like going after all the police, like I don't want fucking tweets about like your dad being a good cop. I'm just saying like the people who have like tasered yeah the people who have tasered children yeah let's start there um part of me is just like what happened to i i get if they're like an actual threat then the taser is better than like shooting a guy to death right um but if you're not a threat if you're unarmed if you're just being like difficult like what

happened to like cops having to fucking subdue these people like why are all these like mma guys doing like fucking jujitsu seminars for law enforcement if people have just started fucking tate like that wasn't the point of the taser the taser was supposed to be uh before deadly threat so they're not proposing enough of a threat where you have to use, I'm sorry, deadly force. Because I remember like, do you remember when that dude like ran onto the baseball field and he got tased? And it was this really popular YouTube clip because they were like,

ah, dude's getting tased. And I remember even liberals that follow me on Twitter when I was like, so this is fucked up. We're like, that's what he gets, bro. That's what he gets for running on to a baseball field. I'm like, he gets fucking electrocuted? Like, what happened to the days where the cops had to get off their fucking ass, chase someone, be in somewhat good shape, and just subdue him?

Just hold him to the fucking ground? I disagree with you there. Okay. Okay, I think taser the fuck out of that idiot that runs in the field because he's a retard, okay? And we need to show everybody that it really sucks when you run onto a field because we've got a shitty, stupid, copycat society where if one asshole gets away with charging a baseball player and gets a high five out of the baseball player before he gets tackled to the ground.

By the way, the officers that are tackling to the ground, when you get in a physical altercation with somebody, you risk really getting hurt. And when you're a guy who's just, Look at this. This guy's running around. He's a fucking idiot. He's ruining the game. Taser this asshole. But we can all agree... Okay, once he's down, they shouldn't have tasered him. This is what the problem was.

Unless they tasered him to drop it, it looked like he dropped himself. No, it's one of those ones that shoot out. Let me see it. Can you back it up again? Let me see it, because it looked to me for a second there like he lied down, and then they tasered him when no no no it's the ones that shoot out those little spikes with the cables and oh okay my favorite boom okay zaps him in the back right there and that's when he goes down well yeah fuck that guy that guy's an idiot but the guys running around the field he's a retard

these poor guys with families and lives and knees and bodies what they should have to risk their fucking knees and neck to take down this asshole you know you can get an injury taking a man down that you sustain for the rest of your life why because some dickhead wants to be cute and ruin a whole fucking baseball game for everybody don't get me wrong i hate that stuff dude if somebody if somebody is talking at a movie in a whisper i I'm just like, I should break their neck. Like, I definitely, like, I hate assholes like that. I can't be fucking around drunk people.

If I have to, like, leave my, like, I had to leave Vegas at, like, 5 in the morning. So there were still drunk people from the night before. I fucking fled that city. Like, it was, like, fucking walking dead. Like, I was just like, get me the fuck out of here. I hate people like that. And fine them, arrest them, whatever. But, like, but like when if he died which many people have because of the conditions but now you know but watch don't do that again that's some hunger game shit listen don't do that again don't

do that again he's dead he won't he's dead everybody else knows now you can get fucking zapped to death if you're an asshole because we don't need any encouragement for assholes okay we need this is what i believe this is what I believe can stop this whole police brutality problem. We have to make our relationship with the cops different. The cops are supposed to be respected members of our community that are there to help us when the shit goes wrong. It's become, by shitty management and by old asshole, cunt, fuckhead, those white shirt douchebags that you see punching kids,

it all trickles down from the top. And they establish the attitude for the younger officers. And these guys who go into the police academies with good intentions can be corrupted by old jaded motherfuckers that have a shitty way of looking at people. But we have to look at it differently too. This us versus them mentality a lot of times comes from people that have a distrust of police from the past or of things that they've seen when it comes to corruption or things

they've seen when it comes to brutality. Or they're just a bunch of assholes that are always doing crimes because they always have to deal with cops going cup to shit, man. Right, right. You know, and so it develops that way. Well, so let's go back. So, like, all right, I picked, like, the most hateable guy by saying the guy who ran in the field yeah that's not a good example but the 11 year old girl got going back to like the retarded

people going back to uh kids and shit like that it's like because i have met a lot of well wait a minute what about retarded people that are violent uh you say retarded but i mean you mean down syndrome yeah there were stories Of like Down syndromes They can be really strong Sure but they have The mental capacity Of a child

And then they have No weapons or anything It's just like They're not doing What the cops are Telling them to do Yeah when you see A dude who's like

Mentally ill And he's lifting weights What good can come Out of that He gets even stronger Maybe he could be A superhero You shouldn't let

I don't think you should Let mentally handicapped people lift weights is that a bad thing to say I'm sure it is it probably is right it's probably super offensive

mainly because like we're in the kettlebell selling business people yeah but I mean I'm not sure if you want like unless they're like really cool but if you had them

then they're really like so that's what you should have like a conversation with them and just be like so what kind of music can you do man yeah like what do you what do you think

about first dates when should a girl with them and just be like, so what kind of music are you into, man? Yeah, like, what do you think about first dates? When should a girl put out? And he just gets violent. Right now, right away. Take the kettlebells away. Yeah, you can't get any stronger, dude. What I was going to say about the white shirts is, you know, yeah, once you have that sort of... Us versus them.

The us versus them permeates,ates man i used to work as a security guard at a concert place and uh there was like one of the first days i was there this guy uh his name was alley cat he's this crazy dude he uh they this kid stole a golf cart and they tackled the kid and got on top of him and beat him with a walkie-talkie. Oh, my God. I mean, it was pretty intense. This was one of my first days on the job. And I was like, all right, I guess I know how shit goes down here. These guys were not fucking around.

He had a group of psychopaths working for him. And that was the whole concert security. They were just down to, I mean, they weren't, like, assaulting people. It was only assholes. I mean, someone had to do something, take a swing at them first. But they were excited to fuck up drunk people that were assholes. I mean, they never did anything that was illegal. Everything they did was completely legal for the job.

But our job, essentially, I got hired. It was me and nine black belts from my Taekwondo Academy. So that was the whole security team. It was the Taekwondo Academy. So that was the whole security team. It was the Taekwondo Academy and Alley Cat and his buddies. Your guys' competition team and the walkie-talkie guy. Yeah, but Alley Cat and his buddies were these big fucking hockey player looking dudes

who were tough-ass Boston dudes. And they had been working in the security business for years. They were just down to fuck people up. They weren't necessarily martial arts, trained martial artists, but they knew how to fight. They were ready to fuck people up. So it't necessarily like martial arts, trained martial artists, but they knew how to fight. They were ready

to fuck people up. So it was the most ridiculous setup ever. These drunk, idiot concert goers surrounded by train killers who were led by a complete psychopath

who encouraged you to fuck up people who stepped out of line. Hey, rent-a-cop, what are you doing with your walkie-talkie? Stop it. Stop it.

Yeah, well, if you were fucking around, man, he would beat your ass. But you developed that mentality. Totally. Even working there, I noticed that mentality. Well, like a real commonplace analogy is like whenever you're a pedestrian, like walking around New York, and you're like these fucking idiot taxis and stuff like that, and then you're in a cab or a car, and you're like fucking run them over, these asshole pedestrians, where it where it's like yeah you just get into this fucking mode and here's the thing like when we were at nato which like erupted um

for the protest in chicago uh the first day the cops were actually like the cops i talked to were super chill um where one dude saw i had a jujitsu shirt on and he's like where you train man and we just like talked about jujitsu that's like a such a common thing with people that you know if you find someone that trains you you train, it's like automatically. It's like, I know I can probably talk to this guy. Hold on. You're a purple belt? Oh.

I've been wearing jiu-jitsu shirts ever since the protest. That's a good move, man. Maybe the cops won't beat you as hard. No, right. I'm going to fake tase you, bro. Or it'll just be like an awesome movie. Like, you can start in half guard, and then I'm going to tase you to death. And I'm going to beat you with my walkie-talkie. Just don't run onto baseball fields. That's all I'm saying, folks. I don't think cops should be like an awesome movie. Like you can start in half guard and then I'm going to tase you to death. I'm going to beat you with my walkie talkie.

Just don't run onto baseball fields. That's all I'm saying, folks. I don't think cops should be tasing old ladies. We had a fucking, we had a thing in NATO where actually it was a white shirt that stuck up for us. My partner on Citizen Radio, my wife, is like much more like realistic. Sometimes I get like idealistic and she's like, right, but if you're going to stop being stupid about it. And I'm like, oh, you're right. You're more lefty hippie than her uh no she she's just she's much more of like uh i'm kind of like maybe we can all get along and she's like or maybe we should learn

how to fire a gun but well you know what when you're a woman i think you know dealing with the idea that the other side of the coin is always going to be stronger. The other sex is always stronger, more aggressive, more dangerous. And the chances of a woman doing you harm versus the chances of a man doing you harm are staggeringly different. So just growing up like that, I think you automatically go, you know, you realize, like, no, you need a fucking God. You're in a fucking, you're in a zoo filled with wild chimps that's that's what humanity even with the i gotta go back to the story but even like there's so much shit that like whenever that i just like being a girl like if you're a woman like you probably can't go to like a family reunion

without having your tits like that you know what i mean probably it's like and thinking about creepy uncles that might have touched you inappropriately or squeezed your butt when you were tan or did something. And who knows what worse? Or all the kids that you did it to, you know? Oh, how dare you, Brian. How dare you, Brian. I just became an uncle and all I want to do is be

the cool uncle, but I'm like, man, too many uncles fucked kids that now, there's no cool uncle connotation. It's all creepy uncle connotation. Yeah, I mean, you can't look at it as an uncle. You gotta look at it as you're their friend and you love them. You know, there's no cool uncle connotation it's all creepy uncle connotation yeah i mean you can't look at it as an uncle you gotta look at it as you're their friend and you love them you know there's a pop fuck labels right just because some other old dude tried to diddle so uh so with the nato thing uh it was crazy so like allison and i actually got like the closest pretty much i thought this like white cop, I thought I charmed him.

And what happened was we kept breaking through the police lines for some reason. And in New York, usually what happens is protesters on one side, cops on one side. Either a protester moves or a cop moves. Something happens. The police swarm in. They start tackling some kid. And what was great about New York is there was this camaraderie among all the journalists where suddenly you had 50 journalists like the cops right here you had 50 journalists over taking

pictures asking what the kid's name is you had lawyers the lawyers guilds would wear hats so people knew the lawyers they would run to the front yeah and this is like some old-school gangs of New York type it was like some gang warfare I'll show you a picture after the show that I have to find on my phone where it's just like it was the anarchists the black block and it was a just a banner that said fuck the police and they were here and the police were here and some of the cops were like they don't mean it but anyway so Wow we're used to the report banners that said fuck the police I only saw it once that was like an Occupy

thing that was like a side like Occupy is not hardcore enough for us. Right. What do you think about the people that believe that a lot of that is actually people that are cops undercover? Oh, I've seen it. You've seen it? Oh, totally.

What did you see? The instigators or... I haven't seen... I've only seen videos and read articles about the cops actually being the ones that started the violence. What is the term for that? So –

On tour. What is it? Agent provocateur. Provocateur, yeah. Yeah. And, yeah, that shit's happened. I mean I remember just undercover cops. They're usually like fairly obvious.

We interviewed two that were convinced. Really? Well, because it was just a tall dude with a crew cut who had a Rage Against the Machine shirt. And I was like, come on, man. Like you can't just put on a band shirt. Like, he was like 6'2". Like, he just – the only thing that was missing was like his badge and gun. And it was like a Rage Against the – but it was like toward 93.

Totally. And he was with a friend who like looked the same way, looked like a fucking college wrestler, like short, stocky. And like he had like a fucking Nirvana shirt on. It was ridiculous. And so we were like, let's just interview him. Maybe there'll be really cool or maybe they'll clearly be cops. And, uh, this was in Times Square. So the majority of people there, the March, there wasn't that much, uh, uh, like they announced it and then it happened pretty quickly. Like it wasn't like a big month thing where people were going to be flying in. And we were like, so so you guys from the city?

And they're like, no, we're from, uh, we're from Niagara falls, New York. And we just, uh,

took a bus. Like their story was like really detailed. It was like, we took a bus down, just hit the open road, trying to find ourself. And we're just like, Oh,

wait a second. And you're like, Oh, Jimmy here is getting married next week. Like, it was just like super fucking ridiculous. And, uh, you know, it'd be a really funny, uh, week. It was just super fucking ridiculous. You know, it would be a really funny show to have a show just called Liars.

We just have people try to pretend to fit in with different organizations, like fit in with Occupy. Hey, guys, let's do something violent. Am I right? Let's fuck the police, man. The fucking police are pigs, okay? Let's get Al Qaeda on the phone. Am I right? Fuck the police man The fucking police are pigs Okay Let's get Al Qaeda on the phone Am I right?

Yeah what's up bro I know how to make a bomb Hey I saw Rage Against the Machine I can view the plans for a bomb On my Sprint 4G So you saw some people You definitely believe were cops Oh I mean well

Because you'd see them later In plain clothes Talking to the cops Wow And yeah And so And they would just infiltrate and try to like well a lot of times i mean they're they're a lot of them like i you have there's no evidence that they're like placed there to be agent provocateurs but i mean they are trying to like get information i mean there were stories the guardian wrote a piece a little while ago about um cops going undercover with activists and like fucking them like just like fucking these girls and like really yeah i mean like like it's probably a lot

of low-hanging fruit with hippies lost hippies probably a lot of smelly pussy dude it's like he's hippie but yet he's still oddly alpha what's going on here he smells like cologne a lot of yeast infections going on you think so probably a so? Yeah. Probably a lot of camping. Yeah. Hey. So the cops were banging the chicks. How could you stop them? Oh, right.

But I'm like. Everybody likes a little hippie pussy. Is this where we need our undercover cops? It was like, do you remember like during the lead up to the war in Iraq? It was like there were literally groups with peace in the title. It was like old ladies for peace. And there'd be fucking narc showing up. And it's like, dude, peace is in the title. It was like old ladies for peace. And there'd be fucking narc showing up. And it's like,

dude, pieces in the title. Like, you know what I mean? Like there are, there are, there are real fucking criminals out there. How about violent protesters for peace?

Yeah. Yeah. Right. We, we, we don't want to hurt the Iraqis, but we really want to hurt cops, cops,

white, white, white cops, crew cuts. Oh, so this, this dude with this white shirt actually saved our ass. So he was one of the guys I was talking to the day before and we were kind of friendly

and so we knew I was pressed. By the way, we're not saying we want to hurt white cops or crew cuts. Just for any idiot that listened into that. We're being a fake character. Like someone's sitting there and they're like, got it. We're talking about an idiot thinking that. Not talking, okay? That is crazy. You have to preface that shit.

You gotta do it because someone could take a fucking sound clip of that. They fucking hate white cops with crew cuts. We're living in a world filled with dumb, dumb, dumb dumbs. That's part of the problem. And some of them get to be cops. And the real problem is not cops. The real problem is just a staggering amount of stupid fucking assholes that are in every walk of life, man. It's ego, too.

We had a friend in New York who used to do the psychological evaluations for the first level for police training. And she would just tell us these stories where there was one dude. I'm trying to remember the exact line. The question was pretty easy where it was like, why do you want to be a police officer? And take in mind, like you're being interviewed to be a cop. This is like the one, like if you're, this is the one time you just, just don't be crazy. That's all you have to do to answer that. Why do you want to be a cop?

That's a super, protect people. All done. Just don't be crazy for like 10 seconds. She goes, why do you want to be a cop? And he goes, so I can finally get the respect I deserve. Oh my God. What? cop and he goes so i can finally get the respect i deserve oh my god what it's like that's the dude who's gonna fucking curb stomp somebody oh dude who's gonna fucking walkie talkie dumbest answer ever but it's like how crazy are you that you couldn't even stifle that for the fucking interview isn't it brian i guess that's ridiculous. It's fucking so ridiculous. Totally, like, ridiculous. The dumbest answer ever.

Why do you want to be a cop? Revenge? It's like, if I get the respect I deserve. What? Fucking fuck some people up. But anyway, so. I hate that because I think that cops are important. I hate that because I think that there's a real legitimate place for the police force.

Of course. I mean, do you remember? It should be hard to get into the police force. Do you remember when you were a kid? I just remember being a kid. My perception of cops, mainly because of the war on drugs.

I grew up with a cop. My dad was a cop. I don't know him. He was very violent. Then, well, then my perception of cops might be a little more realistic. Yeah.

Well, because I grew up in suburbia and they would be our crossing guards and shit like that. And so I grew up being like, right, of course, course you trust the police they're here to help like they're always and then the older i got like and i just see like my friends get like jacked up for having like a dime bag of weed or like whatever because it was just bored fucking bully cops i don't remember

too much about my childhood but i do specifically remember my father beating the fuck out of a teenage kid once i forget what he did i don't remember the fuck out of a teenage kid once. I forget what he did. I don't remember the exact details of it. But it wasn't like murder. No, but he picked him up by his hair. He was a scary guy, and he was a cop, so I grew up with that guy. Yeah, and it's like, well, if that's how we— We not really grew up until I was like six.

Right. But that's one of those things where it's like, fuck, man, if that's how he treats his family, like, what the fuck is going on out always assumed growing up like that i always assumed everybody was crazy i always assumed that everyone when you have a father that is has a a fuse that's like a half an inch long and it'll just explode on someone and beat the shit out of someone in front of you when when you have that you you assume everybody has it. Right, of course. So I never looked at cops like, well, this cop is here to protect me. It was just like, I'm going to get the fuck out of here, right? People can get nasty with you when they, you know, think about how mad people are at little simple things in road rage.

Little simple things, like you missed your exit and you try to get in front of them. And they'll fucking honk their horn and make it seem like they've never done that before. You've never barely made the exit and tried to cut over. And there was enough space. It's not like you had a slam on your brakes. You almost died. You relax. I was going to the airport.

I was taking the train from Penn Station. And I bumped shoulders with just this fucking dude in a suit. Looked like a normal dude. He was like, hey, asshole. He just started screaming. I was like, dude, you got to walk away from this. I've never had that level of anger. The only times I've almost gotten into an altercation is like, all right, do I have to defend somebody or do I have to defend myself?

You have a completely different occupation. If you're doing something that you hate all day, which is what I'm saying with these cops, you're running into them. They're already at nine. That's a really good point, right? Where, like, a lot of the protesters who were trying to reason with these cops are just like, dude, we are fighting so you can get pension, so your fucking benefits aren't going to get taken away. And the problem

with the cops is they should be getting paid a shitload of money. For any cop who has already turned this off and was like, Kilstein, huh? And has, like, left, like, if there are friends around, please play this part as well. They should be getting paid so much more. Because i mean if you're getting paid you know the same manager word at a shitty retail job like of course you're gonna be fucking angry and you're like i had a friend who i do jujitsu with who when we first started talking about occupy he's a cop

when we first started talking about occupy he was like yeah you know like i totally support him and like you know they have the right to be down there and blah blah blah and then by the time it was like three months in and he got dragged down and they're not making overtime and shit like that suddenly a kid runs behind the barrier and this guy's like fuck that kid right like i'm not even getting fucking paid what i should be getting paid for this fuck that kid and then he tackles him and then everyone sees him and you know a lot of the protesters assume well that guy is a fucking asshole like. And it's like, well, you know, he was on your side a couple months ago, but he's getting dicked around by his fucking bosses who don't have to be out there and who are making way more fucking money and who are like essentially career politicians, not even

fucking cops. You know what I mean? Uh, it's gonna breed so much fucking resentment, uh, towards everyone. But in reality, it's just like, again, unless you're making billions of fucking dollars, anytime you see a protester and you scream, get a job, even though a lot of them fucking have jobs, they're teachers and nurses and they're just not making enough money, or they have a shred of fucking empathy, which so many people seem to lack nowadays. When you see them, it's like they're sticking up for you. They want to make sure you don't fucking have to, you know, suddenly start paying a shitload for Medicare for your grandmother or for, you know. Yeah, it's putting people in a very unnatural situation and asking them to behave normally, both cops and protesters.

Putting people in a situation where the cops have to listen to, look, not every protester is fucking smart. You know how many protesters are saying dumb shit to the cops all day and the cops are stuck in traffic getting over there their job sucks it's a dangerous fucking creepy job being the enemy folks it's it's a dangerous creepy job so there's just it's an unnatural position that most people should not be asked to be in but i completely agree that cops should be paid a fuckload of money as should should teachers. Those are two things that is a sign of a sick society. If you look at the way we spend money on foreign wars and this idea of policing places we're never going to fucking visit that have been that way for thousands of years. Fuck you.

To do that and not want to spend money on schools and not want to spend money on cops, is just indicative of how corrupt our society is. We have the money. If everybody just worked and used their resources the way we would want them used, if we used our resources in this country the way that people would actually vote on, if we could all vote on what percentage of money should be put on national defense, what percentage should be on education? You'd be amazed. If we could decide, you'd be amazed at how quickly things could change.

It's a sign of corruption. But what happens if we don't fund the education system? Then we have a shitty education, more people drop out, and then they can join the fucking military and fight these wars. Exactly. It makes it easier. I mean, that's the argument. The argument is that it's weakened on purpose in order to make sure that they always have a steady supply of rubes to work for them and do their bidding. And their dad was arrested for drug dealing. So then this kid had to take care of his fucking mother, right? So then he ends up drug dealing. Then fucking he goes to jail.

And then you get out of jail. And what? You're just going to start fucking applying to Ivy League schools? You're going to look for like internships in the media business? Like, of course, you're going to fucking drug deal because that's the only way to put money on your – to feed your family. Yeah, people have to accept that other folks get a real bad roll of the dice and you start off on shit street. And there's not much you can do about that that but imitate your atmosphere in order to try to get by in life right that is a lot of our problem in this world it is not the the children that are

committing crimes that are the problem it's how these children get into this position where they can commit crimes what the fuck is going on well what's going on is there's a shit education and there's a fucking shit community and there's a bunch of people that are constantly involved in crime and that is the roll of the dice that these poor people got. What we have to figure out as a society is how to improve the weakest areas of our foundation, the weakest areas of our structure. The weakest areas, clearly, are the areas of impoverished people that are filled with

crime. We need to fix those. And until you fix those, you're not really trying to make a better America. You're just being an asshole. You're just wasting our tax dollars doing shit that corporations want you to do because they've paid you and that's how they got you into office. Well, I mean, the heads of these corporations are paying less in taxes than all of your listeners are.

Yeah. And that's what's so crazy is they say, well, well I did this. It was the free market. The government didn't make this job. Right. But it's like, right. But they paid for the roads you took to get there.

They paid for the police that protected your corporation from being robbed. They pay for, you know, maybe your kids went to public school, but I doubt it. Uh, but parks, I mean,

here's the, here's the real issue that people have. The people that don't want to pay more taxes. Here's the issue that people have. The number one, the most prevalent point is they don't want lazy people to get free money. That is it. And that is a real point. And that's being ignored by the left to a certain extent because we really do have to look at the welfare mindset because it is a terrible psychological mindset but compare

the the people you're describing are out there for sure there's a lot but they hail in comparison to the amount of kids you were just talking about uh who are the ones who are born into poverty yes and i mean here's what i completely agree but i don't think that money just pushing money in their hands is the way to handle it no but i mean there were people it people – I completely agree, but I don't think that money, just pushing money in their hands is the way to handle it. No, but I mean there were people who – It's a lazy way of approaching it. But at the same time, there was a – look, you lose your job, for example, right? You lose your job, you lose your benefits, right?

Back before the Affordable Care Act, which I have problems with, again, before anyone threes me. Before the Affordable Care Act, you couldn't re-get health insurance if, let's say, you were sick. Let's say you had cancer, right? Because that was a pre-existing condition. So, now you got fired, you're not getting any money, or maybe even if you are getting welfare money, but now suddenly you have to pay for your own fucking cancer treatment.

And so then what happens? Well, he doesn't have insurance, so then he goes to the hospital, they have to see him, and if he can't fucking pay, then the hospital pays for it see him and if he can't fucking pay then the hospital pays for it and then like we're just losing more and more money yes here's the issue with what you just brought up you just brought up an artificial scenario i can bring you up another one here's a woman she never works she keeps having children the more children she has the more money she gets her kids all become criminals no they're all me and my wife they're all they're

all being raised by idiots in a terrible environment, and everyone's on welfare and food stamps, and people don't want their money to continue to go to that. There's that, too. There's that that you're looking at welfare as sponsoring a criminal organization. But I don't necessarily think that sending them a check is the way to do it. I'm not saying that they don't deserve attention. They most certainly do.

I have always said, and I say it on this podcast all the time, that if you want to make the country a better place, the first thing you've got to do is make sure there's less losers. So you have to find children and give them hope. And so you've got to give a kid who, you know, has got a shit roll of the dice and give

them an opportunity. And I think there's plenty of people and plenty of resources to accomplish that. And I think it should be our number one goal as Americans. If we really truly consider this a tribe, if we really are a tribe of 300 million people, we can't ignore the shittiest part of the tribe. But money is not the answer. Spending money on programs and education and having community centers and giving them a

sense of community, building up a sense of community, making sure that everyone has food, okay? Taking that out of the equation so people don't have to worry about fucking starving to death. I'm 100% for that. Giving them a sense of community, building up a sense of community, making sure that everyone has food. Taking that out of the equation so people don't have to worry about fucking starving to death. I'm 100% for that. But just giving them a check, I don't agree with that. I think maybe we should set up places where they can all – like community centers where anyone can eat at any time. You want job placement centers and stuff like that. Yeah, I want education. I want a place where you can go there and there's a boxing coach.

There's a guy who can teach you jujitsu. Oh, totally. Where kids can have something where they can have a positive place to put their energy, and you could develop good human beings. So, I mean, we are on the same page. We're unquestionably on the same page of helping people that need help, especially people that just got unfortunate, and people that are sick 100%. I think that should be, again, a part of a tribe but don't give all of my friends

okay in my you know whatever we call death squad or immediate if anyone of my friends was ever in a situation where they needed money for anything and I have that money I would I would spend it immediately this is why I came here today but you know what I'm saying? Several proposals. But you know what I'm saying? That's how we should feel as a community. 100%. When we have an issue,

like you know the issue with this comic who was hurt in the Aurora shootout? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. The comic community has rallied around. They're doing a bunch of benefits for this kid. It's great. Yeah. And they're donating money to his family,

and it's beautiful. So how do we do that on a on a large scale right when i i think the answer because yeah of course you just like you're not told you know you're not supposed to give uh uh homeless like alcoholics money so they don't buy alcohol you're supposed to take them to a shelter or call a shelter don't give a man a fish i do agree right don't uh you don't want those lazy people getting checks or kettlebells as we discussed earlier what we need dude is a shift in the way human beings approach each other the way we're taught we can approach each other and the way that will benefit us yeah totally individual but i think that's why occupy got so popular because you know it wasn't just resentment because you're wealthy you know what

i mean i think like chael had that quote where he was saying that like liberals don't uh liberals don't like they something like they hate wealthy people it wasn't like you know that it made it more of like oh we're jealous we just don't like you for being rich that's bullshit if you get rich ethically good for you like that's great you say that and that's nice and you have a very good point of view however there's a lot of morons who adopted the if you're rich you did it off the backs of other people i mean we had i mean we had i've i've faced it as an entertainer oh i know everything i've done is just try to make people i mean everything i do for money i'm trying to make people laugh trying to explain jiu-jitsu i'm not hurting

anybody but yeah people will be upset at me personally because i've made money i had a couple I mean, everything I do for money. I'm trying to make people laugh. I'm trying to explain jiu-jitsu. I'm not hurting anybody. But yeah, people would be upset at me personally because I've made money. I've had that argument. I had a couple of people who – and then I'll get to the positive point. But I had a couple of people who – and this is – we have tens of thousands of liberal kids who listen to us. And maybe this was like four or five tweets, but they were so obnoxious that those were the ones I fucking focused on. Of course. tweets but they were so obnoxious that those were the ones i fucking focused on of course when i did conan uh which have not been invited back uh talked about drone strikes criticized obama and on the same episode like i was like i wonder why they got so much hate mail and then like the other guests it was like some like child star and like kobe bryant and i was like oh that makes

sense that's not really my crowd uh and so you know talking about drone strikes did literally everything i could to make it like like, as different and edgy. Like, just walk the fucking line as close as I could. And someone immediately was like, yo, bro, like, TBS is owned by this, like, giant corporation. And I'm like, go fuck yourself and die. Like, what am I supposed to do? Like, there are going to be those, like, left of left miserable people who wouldn't be happy unless it was like, is citizen radio live from a box in an alley uh someone please bring me food i'm really hungry uh and then they'd be like yeah man like che guevara they haven't sold out yet right would

you get an apartment you fucking sell out an apartment in the backs of your listeners would i send you money so you talk and now you get a fucking apartment dude really i want you broadcasting from the emergency room for emergency care but i used to believe in you that's one of my favorite ones but i used to believe in you you went to a subscription model jamie kilstein you fucking sold and we have that's the thing i'm like dude we have made every terrible business decision to not sell out like every mistake we should be homeless a thousand times over we sell out the shit we love well and that's the difference right we sell out to the flashlight we sell out to on it yeah we had one we had one sponsor like back in the day that we really like legitimately supported and like bought shit from so we were like sure and of course because they were ethical they were like

we can't afford to pay anymore and i was like right on you know we were going back we were talking about uh the difference between the silent protest being so creepy and throwing glitter on people yeah and i did want to say i didn't want to stop your rant but i did want to say that i talking about the difference between the silent protest being so creepy and throwing glitter on people. And I did want to say, I didn't want to stop your rant, but I did want to say that I fucking love when they throw glitter on people. Have you seen the Tom Freeman pie? No, I don't like pies. Pies are rude.

But glitter on undercover gay dudes who are mean to other gay dudes, that shit is beautiful. Marcus Bachman, man, when they glitter Marcus Bachman, I've been going back and forth on Twitter with the dudes who do it. Oh, really? They send me tweets and emails whenever they catch him and they throw glitter on him. They showed up at his place and dressed as barbarians. And I fucking love that. I love that.

Because Marcus Bachman, if you don't know who he is, his wife, Michelle Bachman, at one point in time, somehow or another they thought she was going to be like a Sarah Palin type character, only even nuttier. And they were going to try that out. But we're not ready for this yet. We're not ready for a lady who not only probably thinks the earth is 10,000 years old, but has a fucking gay husband.

Well, they have one of those gay conversion camps that he runs. Yeah, he runs a Pray the Gayway camp. Which, by the way, is like if you're a gay dude and you're looking to pick up guys, that's where you go. Yeah, you go to Pray the Gayway camp. If you're a gay dude and you're looking to pick up guys, that's where you go. Yeah, you go to Pray the Gay Away camp. One of them, it was New York Times or Vanity Fair, did an undercover sort of a thing where they went there.

And they're all like, guys are hugging you from behind with their boners pressed into your ass. No bullshit. And they're praying the gay away. And so these guys, I don't remember the name of the group. I apologize. But I thought it's fucking awesome. A bunch of proud gay guys just showed up at Marcus Bachman's Pray the Gay Away place dressed as barbarians. And then they're throwing glitter on them whenever they see them. I think that's fucking awesome.

It's a high time that that becomes ridiculous. The two kids that stood up and made out, the two guys who made up at the rick santorum rally came to my show in chicago and uh apparently they didn't plan it they just like went like ironically to the rick santorum rally and what was so funny were they gay or yeah yeah they're a couple it would be a real protest if they weren't yeah good on them either way they just start sucking each other's dicks fuck you sant, Santorum. Oh, yeah, Rick. Check this out. Hail Satan. But here's what was so funny.

My favorite part about that was – so they're like big – they look like hockey players. So like they stood up and I was like, are these dudes going to brawl? They were just like these bearded. And so they stand up and they start making out. And like the audience – you hear the audience at first. They're they're like uh they progressively just got more creeped out but then my favorite part is because it was republicans they didn't know what else to do so they just start chanting usa usa which doesn't even make sense like it looks like so essentially all you see is a rick santorum rally two dudes making out and it looks like everyone is rallying behind them. They got punked. Being like, America. And then the kids left.

That's hilarious. They took a Rick Santorum poster from the rally and made them sign it for us. Is there a video of them chanting USA while those guys are kissing? Oh, yeah, totally. Because that would be awesome. It's the funniest thing.

They should have that for gay America. They should have a video. Just show them kissing. Where are the people? I guess they're already... Yeah, my buddies. Dan Madona. Oh, they already chanted it. They chanted USA after they were ejected.

What a dumb chant. USA. This is USA, you fuckhead. I know. USA is gay people too. That is so dumb. But that's what they do when they panic. It's just like, what country are we in again?

Right, USA. Yeah, let's just all be as dumb as possible. USA. We'll just break it down to some letters and we all agree we're on the same team. Okay, we're ready to go. What does that even mean? You can't interrupt a dummy who wants to be king by kissing. You can't interrupt a dummy,

a silly dummy that has no right running the world. No. No, you crazy asshole who believes in old, ancient, stupid shit. No, you can't run things. You silly man uh and then here that blows my mind that like religion is the one thing where like you don't need evidence and it'll be one thing of like you just like like i'm an atheist and like when i first

read uh you know the big atheist books and stuff there was part of me that didn't want to go around and like i don't know there is part of you like when you first read something that you had no idea and you're like, fuck man, I've been lied to for so long that you do want to take it to an extreme or like if you see a kid who's like, Merry Christmas, be like, fuck you, there is no Christmas idiot and like kick him over and be like, read Christopher Hitchens, asshole. But like then once you kind of calm down and you know, you, if people are going to be religious and, let's say, not hurt people or just because they believe in something and it makes them happier, it makes them feel whole, like, that's fine.

That's fine with me. That is fine. But the fact that you can make policy without proving there's a Jesus, without proving there's a God, you can make policy that hurts actual people. Like, we're not positive about Jesus. I'm positive there are dudes due to suck cock positive positive They're girls like pussy seeing pictures of it. There is evidence. There's no picture of fucking Jesus There's absolutely picture of girls eating

That that It's well It's it's ridiculous that anybody should be able to ever enforce any behavior patterns on anybody else, if they're choice behavior patterns, if those behavior patterns don't hurt other people. If your behavior patterns are you like to push people into the street, well, yeah, that should be eliminated. What if you do it while going nom, nom, nom, nom? Well, maybe it would be funny that way. I don't know.

It depends on who you're pushing in the street. What if you're pushing people who are assholes? Right. You know, if you're a vigilante. While making that noise. So you're doing something good and you're being kind of funny the pussy eating punisher um push i don't get what the fuck am i saying um it's just we we have to i think we have to uh look at our model of human behavior and we have to change it you know my um i had a revelation

and it became like a bit that's in my act now, but it really did. I really did have this revelation on a, on a boat looking at some dolphins. And I was thinking of like how smart dolphins are and what is it like to be a dolphin, like dolphin consciousness. I was thinking how strange it is if it like being a dolphin, like the way he thinks of himself is exactly the way I think of myself.

We're just trapped in different worlds. Like I can manipulate things with my fingers and he has to kill things with his face. And I thought about, would I be him if I was a dolphin? And then I thought about people, and I was like, how the fuck would it be if we are literally all the same thing, and that we're looking at ourselves through different life experiences, we're looking at ourselves through different genetics. But if you were that little kid with cerebral palsy,

you would be him. If you lived his life, you were born him, you would be him. And if he lived your life, he would be you. And then it's like we are just a unique combination of hormones and life experiences combined with a soul and the entity, the consciousness, whatever the fuck it is,

that has to go through life and make the decisions. And how crazy would it be if we could realize that we can be happy if we treat everybody that we meet everybody that we deal with as if it's us living another life and that doesn't mean no competition that doesn't mean no innovation that doesn't mean no competition as far as capitalism it doesn't mean you know we we have to rely on some ridiculous commune system where nobody has any reward incentives. Just don't start off being a dick.

Yeah, just don't be a fucking piece of shit. Don't open by being an asshole. Treat the world as if it's you. I swear to God, I think that's possible. I think if you do good work, as long as we have a real economy, if we have a real market, if we really do manufacture things and create things that have merit, and if we really can figure that out, if that's possible. And that's what makes it a little trickier because – I'm not sure if we can really run a society like this without being corrupt.

Well, the problem is it's like I really don't think that the majority of Americans are like racist, homophobic pieces of shit. of Americans are like racist, homophobic pieces of shit. But a point that Allison writes about a lot is, you know, in times of economic struggle, that's when you see harsher immigration laws come down. That's when you see more homophobia. That's when you see more violence because it's always this other, right? Because in America, you're told you can do whatever you want. If you want to be a millionaire, if you want to be a successful entrepreneur, you can do it. And then you don't do it. But you have some politician, some rich politician who has your fucking money. You have him saying, well, we just have too many immigrants taking your jobs. They're like, it's the gays.

They're angering Jesus. And then you start blaming these other people because you're like, it's not me. Because there are a lot of Republicans who are being fucked just like we're being fucked, just like everyone, independents, whatever, are being fucked just like we're being fucked just like everyone independence whatever are being fucked because uh and the people who are actually doing the fucking are just like well don't look at my house don't look at my mansion don't look at my bank account don't look at my fucking tax records it's fucking jose over there and you look and it's just just like friendly mexican dude in a pickup truck like that guy's going for your job and you're like well fuck Jose because it's also easier to

go after the immigrants than it is to overthrow our broken system right like if you tell someone that the election was rigged or that votes are being suppressed or that George Bush didn't win in 2000 they're like I'm just gonna blame Nader because that dude's fucking old and that seems easier

you know what I mean it's easier to blame like uh a Ron Paul it's easier to blame a Ralph Nader then it's easier to blame an immigrant than to be like oh no it's all the people with all the power and all the money and all the guns and the roadmaps to the wars like they're the ones we have to like yeah we need you know we need a shift in the identification of responsibility. But going back to where I totally agree with you is, you know, a lot of people think that atheists are these weird, immoral, we're just butt-fucking and worshiping the devil. Wait a minute, you know?

I mean, that's like a Tuesday thing, but not like all week. You've got to rest on Wednesdays. Do you butt-fuck while you sing Shout at the Devil? You butt-fuck on Tuesday while you praise the devil and then Wednesday, like Jesus, it's like and then he rested. That gives me great happiness knowing that for sure some dudes have buttfucked while singing

Shout at the Devil. Shout! Shout! No doubt about it. Or they're like, Shout at the Devil! When the podcast is over we have to do this. Yeah. They're going to crank it and buttfuck. For sure. And it's going to be like one of the best days of their lives yeah there's a there's a problem with people trying to stop other people from doing shit oh right so and and you know where that comes from it's like fear who's always the dickhead who's going hard like way too hard

and aggressive uh against smaller people at jujitsu the dude who sucks at jujitsu who's always the comic who when you get to the club he's automatically like just like hey uh it's a gay shirt you got like where's your wife probably fucking and you're like who the fuck are you and what's the shitty emc yeah that is right and then you know i mean that always happens where it's like the more brutal the more of an ego you have because look if you look at uh statistically we're not handling this marriage thing well this thing that like we claim is so fucking sanctimonious and marriage is one of the institutions of America. Well, the majority of people get fucking divorced. So obviously we're not doing it right.

But it's that same fucking ego, right? Well, it's like, well, I'm not happy. So I don't want that fucking gay motherfucker singing heavy metal. That's not marriage. Right. Okay. You want to call it a union a marriage is between a man and a woman a man and a woman you have to be miserable

you have to surrender all your dreams you have to hate your fucking spike kids that you had well i'm not miserable like that that doesn't say that no i'm saying you need jesus in your life if you want to marry a man but i'm saying those motherfuckers are so miserable the ones that have miserable marriages i'm not saying it's's – I have a very happy marriage. If you really love marriage and you really – if you really are upset at someone making marriage less than it should be, why don't you attack those fucking drive-thru places in Vegas where you can get married by Elvis? Right. That seems ridiculous. I mean if you want to talk about like not taking a commitment seriously the fact that you could do it drunk but then you have a monogamous gay couple that's been together for 10 years and have a kid and they can't

get married so if one of them fucking is dying the other one can't see him in the hospital bed but that goes back to the empathy right that goes back to just not being a dick because again well it's the idea that there's something wrong with that guy because he likes something different than you right than you like That's so stupid. And it's something that is, by the way, a weakness. And if you're a fucking man, you run around thinking you're some sort of a badass, and you can't understand that someone can have different desires than you, then you're a pussy.

You're weak. Or you're confused. You're sad. Or you're probably gay. Or you're hiding some shit. Could be some gay shit going on in your past. It's all American beauty stabbing. I've always said that there's two types of dudes who want to stop gay marriage There's really dumb people and people that are secretly worried that dicks are delicious really really gay people. It's true

They're just they just fucking crave like this chicken guy this chick-fil-a guy He's spending millions of dollars to stop gay marriage. I Guarantee there's some cock in his past yep i guarantee and it is not the good kind of cock it is dark cock something has happened to him i'm a dark like evil not black yeah either he was molested or he did some molesting or he likes to go to road stops or something. Because that's the thing. Maybe not. I might just be talking shit. He might just be an old crazy rich dude who spends money.

Probably. There has been a dick in his past. You think so? I think there is. I would say if you had to go to Vegas and you had to look at a good line, I think I would say the Vegas line would be that he's getting his – probably had his dick sucked by a dude. Yeah, a lot of crying and dick sucking. So because here's the thing.

There are political issues that I can disagree with people on. But even though I disagree with them, I see where they're coming from where it's like, OK, torture. You think that produces a good result and you want to protect people who may not be criminals. Got it. Like the war, like you think you're protecting us. You think that was like Iraq that attacked us. Like we can disagree and we can talk about facts and stuff like that, but I get it.

But for someone to wake up every day and be like, oh, there are dudes fucking, like dicks are being sucked, and to make that their issue is crazy. Well, their defense though, with a lot of them, they were – look, the real problem with religion is that anybody telling you absolutely they know what God wants you to do is fucking crazy. They're crazy. Every one of them. Anyone who tells you, anybody who wrote anything down, and that's not taken away from the idea that there's not some sort of a natural order to the universe. And maybe there's some sort of higher power or consciousness that is at the end of this

whole crazy ride that we're all on. But when you decide that you definitely know that this shouldn't be happening, even though the people that are doing it are enjoying it, because it's some ancient thing, some God, that God wants you to stop. We have an education problem. That's what that is. That is an education problem. That is a education problem. That's what that is. That is an education problem. That is a consciousness problem.

That is a problem with people that have not been raised to accept other people's happiness. Well, and I don't know. I don't think I've ever talked about this. I don't think I've talked about it on your show or anything. But, like, I started thinking that way since I was an atheist. I was more of a dick. I was more selfish when I believed in some kind of God. I was never religious.

I never went to church. I never went to synagogue. I never – I always knew organized religion. Here's how crazy religion is. Even though I was on stage talking about how I thought – I consider myself agnostic, which to me is almost like worse than being a Christian because at least Christians are taking like a stand. A dumb stand, but a stand. Whereas like agnostics to me are like independent voters where it's like make up your fucking mind and start losing friends like me.

Like start alienating people and just be fucking miserable. I think the world needs agnostics. I think we need agnostics with almost everything. But here's what I think. I think that most atheists are agnostics because like if we're going, if we're going to be technical and then I'll get back to like, if we're going to be technical, anyone who says they're 100% sure that there is a God or there isn't God is wrong. So as an agnostic, I'm like, all right, so I look for evidence and I look for science

and until that happens, I'm just going to live like there's no God or whatever. And, but if right now, like during the podcast, like,'s no God or whatever and but if right now like during the podcast like you know something happened and God came down. I wouldn't be like fuck you ever at Sam Harris. You're not real I'd be like I was wrong. You know yeah, you know what man Sam Harris is a friend of mine and Sam Harris is a brilliant guy, but Sam Harris it doesn't know exactly how the universe works either Yeah, but to say you're an atheist when when you see these guys who are these um these string theorists theorist dudes these guys who are working on trying to

decipher the the very matter that that can constitutes the universe they're trying to figure out like at the very heart of it they're they're finding these mathematical computations. They're finding these mathematical patterns in nature. And like, we know that in the Fibonacci sequence, that in the design of faces and sunflowers, that there's an actual formula, a numerical formula

to all of this. And they're not exactly sure what that means. And it could mean that there's some sort of a spiritual or guiding energy or ethic at the end of the universe. I have the answer. I have the meaning of life you're about to get on the show. First of all, the first part of the meaning of life is, Sam, torture's bad.

Torture's totally bad. And so is racial profiling. Oh, for Sam Harris? Sam, just if you're listening, it's not good. You're a smart guy. I love Letter to Christian Nation. Racial profiling, not sam harris sam just if you're listening it's not good it's not you're a smart guy i love letter to christian nation racial profiling not good all right my meaning of life um act like you don't know and just be fucking deep like look there is more harm in living like there is a god than there isn't so it's cool to not be sure i don't care i don't harm in living like there is a god There's more potential to be harmed because so I so disagree with well

He hears I think you're a lot of people it actually works as a scaffolding and then Christianity and the idea of good being a good person and being a good Christian and Christian values and and Treating your brother as if he were yourself, you know that I mean that is in the Bible Well, but something that Sam has said, but I mean, there's also, you know, if you're selfish, you're going to go to hell. Like, if you don't believe in Jesus, you'll be slammed by the sword. Well, if you wear two different types of cloth, you go to hell.

How about that? But I think that, like, I didn't need the Bible to tell me not to be an asshole. Like, good fiction. You didn't. You didn't. But maybe there's a dude who has a 9-volt battery brain, and he does. He needs it. He needs – look, we don't necessarily all go into this life with the same equipment.

And there's a lot of people that, for whatever reason, it makes them feel better. It makes their life better. The whole ball of wax, the whole ball of wax the whole ball of christianity well this is what i was saying about the agnostic thing though is so for them cool right like they're not hurting anyone if they if they don't hate the gays because of it or think of a fucking cell as a baby or whatever fine um but i think when you're kind of teetering like i've seen friends of mine and family members who have act and I've done this who when I thought there was a god I was less charitable um really totally because there was this you were less

charitable because there was a part of me but I was also fucking poor but you were also probably you were young too yeah but there's also young but but I would tell myself I remember specifically like walking by people that maybe now I'd give money to, maybe I wouldn't. But I'd walk by someone and I'd be like, well, God will take care of it, right? Or like overseas, like, well, God won't let this happen, even though there have been so many wars and plagues and all this stuff. And then once I was like, you know what? There's probably not a God. Let's just live like there's not one.

I actually took all those cliches about, you know, live every day like it's your last and stuff like that. I started listening to them where I'm like, I'm just going to try to be a good person because this is probably it. And if it's not, fucking bonus, right? Like if there's a heaven and there's a God and I found out I was wrong, I'm not going to be like, fuck you, motherfucker, and like charge him swinging. I'm going to be like, awesome. awesome because and don't get me wrong like i when i was a when i was on stage making fun of religion literally on stage making fun of organized religion i still believed in a god like i remember i consider myself agnostic but my wife was the first atheist i ever met and so i was like so you're agnostic and she goes i'm an atheist and

even though i was on stage criticizing religion sounds Sounds like a match made in heaven. I know. The child. Let's get together and murder some lettuce. You don't do that. You hunt Christians when you're an agnostic and an atheist. But there was part of me in my head that I was just like, when she told me that, I got really scared. And I was like, but you're going to go to hell. And I was on stage.

I didn't think I believed in it for real. But religion was on stage. Like, I didn't think I believed in it for real. But, like, religion was so powerful. And even if you don't grow up that religious, you know, when you grow up, even people who consider themselves an atheist, they still remember just, like, I mean, threatening a child with hell. Like, that's some scary fucking shit. You don't have to tell me, man. I grew up a Catholic. I went to Catholic school for a year. It's terrible.

You will never feel like you're not in the way. Yeah. When you go to Catholic church and Catholic school, especially like in fucking Harrison, New Jersey, like this is some dark shit going on. There's not a lot of happiness. There's no fucking sunny days when you get out of that place. Right. Oh, so what I was going to say about people. Right. So I know people who aren't religious.

They're certainly not homophobic. I mean, I'm sorry. They don't go to church, but they believe in God. And a lot of times, like, you know, they've used that sort of as an excuse for, like, let's say they have, like, a drug relapse or an alcohol relapse. They're like, well, maybe God had another plan for me. Yeah, but just because someone uses it in a weak way doesn't discount them using it in a positive way. And that's why I'm saying, like, if you, again, if you're a good person because you're religious or a good person and you're an atheist, like great, do your thing. But when it comes to like being agnostic, I would rather live like there is no God.

And I'm like I'm just going to try to be a good person for the right reasons. Not because I want to get fucking rewarded in heaven where you can see all my dead cats and eat pancakes or whatever the fuck people think heaven is. And not because I'm scared to burn to hell. Like I want people to be decent people to be decent fucking people. Well, it makes life nicer. That's really where it's at. People don't understand that you can... Have you ever been at a party

where you're hanging out with all your best friends and you're sitting by the pool, some music is playing, maybe you have a couple of drinks and everybody's having a good fucking time and everybody's being nice to each other? You know what I mean? It's like you love having a good party right well life could be a fucking party stupid it really can be you just got to be a nice person and surround yourself with

other people that are trying to be a nice person as well take responsibility for your own fucking actions get your shit together contribute your part so that everybody feels good about the the interactions with you give people more than you think they deserve, just so they feel better about it. And if you can do that, if you can figure out how to do that, you can have a good life. This is actually awesome that you said that, because I wanted to bring this up.

When you wrote that thing on jiu-jitsu, that kind of went viral about ego and jiu-jitsu. I actually didn't write it. I said it. It was when I got my black belt. I did a little speech a speech okay so when that went when someone printed it and like

people started passing it around I'm like at least Marcello's school in New York I'm like I think like Jiu Jitsu schools worldwide were like fucking rejoicing where everyone was so happy about it and I really do believe oh unless you want to sum it up what I said is that it's I meet a lot of people through jiu-jitsu that are really fucking cool.

And one of the reasons is that their ego gets confronted with reality on a daily basis. When you do jiu-jitsu, you're basically battling to the death. I mean, that's what you're doing. You're trying to armbar each other. It's very technical. You're trying to use your technique in an intelligent manner. You're trying to use your technique in an intelligent manner. You're trying to pace your body in an intelligent manner. It's a very real scenario.

And when you tap or when you get dominated or even when you defeat someone, you learn something from the process. You grow and develop. And it is real and concrete. If a guy taps you, it is real and concrete. There's no getting around it. He got you, and that was it. Well, that's what I love about it. People don't have that in real life.

No, and even in other arts, if you're a shitty musician, you can tell yourself that people don't get you and that you're trying to do something. But if you get choked out, you have to tap, right? If you're a bad comedian, again, you can blame the audience or whatever. You have to tap, right? If you're a bad comedian, again, you can blame the audience or whatever. But when it's you who physically has put yourself in a position where you're vulnerable to a submission, someone's locked it on, then you have to take your hand and say, I give up. There's no talking out of that. And what's so interesting to me, especially having like a really liberal base, is sometimes – and this is when I get like the most furious on Twitter. Or when people are like, oh, you're a vegan, but you support human cockfighting.

You support this fucking blood sport. You support MMA. And you know, what's so upsetting is like the vegan argument is ridiculous. Cause I'm like, one of the best fighters in the world is a vegan. Yeah, totally.

Mac dancing's a vegan. Chickens don't get fucking fighter of the night award. Dustin Poirier just tweeted that he's six days without the shit. Right. Might just fucking suck it. At least give the, give them a shot against the farmers. Just all right you

can try to fight your way out chickens uh but fucking but what's so interesting to me is like the hardcore lefties who come at you for your your interest where yeah yeah i guess you're not really a hardcore you're always gonna find really fucking negative people but here's in every walk of life but what's so interesting tying into what you wrote is like, so this week I competed in IBJJF. You won a bronze medal, right? I did. I saw it online. Yeah.

It was my first competition. That's awesome, man. What belt are you right now? I turned 30 and I was like, I'm going to start fucking competing. What belt are you? I just got my blue. I only started doing Gi like last year. That's beautiful.

Yeah, yeah. You just got your blue belt? Dude, whatever you do, man, please stick to that. I know you were trying to do some Thai boxing and stuff like that. Oh, no. I had the one Thai boxing fight. It went great, and I'm like, I don't want to get punched in the face. Yeah.

It went awesome. Really? That's beautiful. But I was like – Stop that. Yeah. Oh, I am. Someone's going to hurt you.

No, I'm better at more – I don't even like training anymore. I just loved – the reason I love jiu-jitsu, I just love jiu-jitsu culture. And I kind of – so – Well, you know what? The reason I love jiu-jitsu, I just love jiu-jitsu culture. Well, you know what? In retrospect, or rather in comparison, I grew up in a kickboxing culture. I grew up in Muay Thai and boxing and taekwondo. And it is a more douchey world.

And the reality is because, first of all, you don't spar hard every day. You don't go at it every day. And in jiu-jitsu, you got it every day. And every day, you don't spar hard every day. You don't go at it every day. And in jiu-jitsu, you got it every day. And every day, you risk getting tapped. Yeah, and lots of times, you don't spar at all. And you just do pad work. And it's a glorified cardio kickboxing class. And when you do spar, you don't go full out. You know, you're not – you shouldn't.

You certainly shouldn't. If we were supposed to spar and I tried to attack you, I would be an asshole. You'd be like, dude, slow the fuck down. Right. Because you're not learning anything when you're going to war like that. What you're doing is just covering up. I rarely have to say that in jiu-jitsu. In kickboxing, I've had to be like, tell me if we're in a real fight because if we're in a real fight, I'm going to hit you as hard as you're hitting me and I'm not going to fuck out.

People are hitting you in jiu-jitsu? Oh, no, no, no. In kickboxing. Oh, in kickboxing. I did it one time. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Where it's, yeah, the level of spazzing. Yeah, because in jiu-jitsu, I welcome spazzes because you need to know that a guy can do that.

Well, because that's jiu-jitsu. Yeah. Usingazzes because you need to know that a guy can do that. Well, because that's jiu-jitsu. Yeah. He's using leverage and being smaller and getting around that big spazzy guy. No, not even that. I mean someone going fucking crazy using all their might right away, which a good guy never does. A good guy will lock up to you like maybe 30%, and then you start moving with each other, and he's looking for advantages. But he's not going to do anything stupid. No one kicks my ass more than Marceloo garcia and he doesn't use any strength at all uh and he and i'll just

do this thing where you literally feel like you're like am i because there's it's just like gumby arms right and you're like am i about to get a lock up he's on my back and like you don't even know how it happened and there was zero fucking strength used uh well what i love so much about it is so i trained with uh marcello in new york but because the competition was in las vegas um i went out to robert drysdale's place and drysdale's like super political one of the smartest guys i know one of the best jujitsu players uh in the world and there was part of me that was nervous like you know because i didn't know how politics worked i don't i've only started really traveling and training in other schools so i had like my

marcello garcia geeks was the only fucking gi i had and you know drysdale's fucking fought marcelo right and not only did him and the people my age and the people who were at my belt and the people who may at the time didn't know we're going to be competing in my division but they just instantly treated me like such a fucking family member i mean robert cornered me and i go dude i have like marcelo's gi i'm like registered under and And he goes, I don't care. He's like, you're my fucking friend. I'm going to corner you. And he cornered me. And what's so funny is if people walked by that school or those lefties on Twitter or not even lefties, just people who don't get MMA, who call it a blood sport. Maybe if you walked by during a sparring session, you'd be like, wow, that looks

fucked up and scary because dudes are like jumping at each other's backs and driving each other into the walls and shit. But when you go in there, I'm like, there was more camaraderie there that I've experienced in comedy that I've experienced. And a lot of these like liberal get togethers and what's so ironic and so frustrating.

And maybe this goes back to, maybe this is what people need to do to treat people decently is like, there are people of all fucking nationalities, religious beliefs, political beliefs, strengths, weaknesses, builds, and you fucking roll with someone for the first time if you've just met someone you shake their hand and you have like a killer role like a back and forth like both of you almost submit you like just escape and the bell rings i'm hugging that dude

like he's a fucking long lost relative oh yeah man you don't think twice about it yeah and and it pisses me off to no end that that is how beautiful and wonderful jiu-jitsu is. But some people see it and they're like, it's a fucking blood sport. I thought you were liberal. I thought you hated violence. Well, I see what they're thinking. What they're thinking is in a perfect world, we shouldn't need violence. And they are scared of people who are enthusiastic about violence.

They think it's dangerous sure and they're scared of people who actively train in something where you're you know what you're actively trying to do is figure out a way to harm someone be a killer you know they're they're thinking from an evolved mindset and i i totally agree with it however i'm stuck with this monkey body okay okay i'm i'm a built like a fucking chimpanzee and I have testosterone my system Sorry, and he's got to take some limbs off. Yeah. Well, what it is is you you have a fucking ancient body We have these bodies that are ten thousand plus years of whatever we've been doing That's how our DNA is designed to operate and what reward system we operate under we have

Like fucking needs and one of the needs is men have a desire to prove themselves. Constantly, whether you want to exist in our society or whether you want to try to make it out on your own, whatever the fuck you're trying to do, one of your main desires to stay alive, one of your main focuses is that men have this desire to do at least something special to stand out. I went to yoga once for the first time. It was like that hot yoga, which is like a fucking nightmare. It's fucking awesome.

And there was a dude in the class. And instantly, I'm like, all right. All right, motherfucker. Like, let's do this. And I was like holding the pose like incorrectly, like longer than like I should have. And like just hurting myself. Oh, that's funny. And then whenever like I'd stop and I'd fuck up my pose, like in my head I'd be like, well, I could kick that guy's ass.

Like yeah, there is that fucking male testosterone. A lot of it is dumb, but it's also necessary for competition and it's necessary to get better. The thing is you have to learn to get good at it. And you have to learn to get good at it with your ego and that's where jiu-jitsu comes along. You develop a healthy respect for competition right like you know like i read that mark maron was talking once about uh not being able to when he was growing up uh if if he wanted his parents to instill anything in in him that they did is be able to enjoy competition because he said he grew up and if he was losing a game he wanted to flip the board over. Like that was his thing. Wait, Mark Maron didn't take losing well?

Did he say Mark Maron that I – I mean that explains so much. Right. I mean it really does about that dude's interactions with people. It's like if someone had just taken him to a jiu-jitsu class early on in life and allowed him to experience – losing is a normal part of life. It's like if you don't want to get better well then you know you're not gonna if you don't want to get better then you you're not going to take any chances and if you don't take any

chances you're not going to get better but if you take chances you're going to fail and you have to fail in order to learn how to move forward well i was uh i was training with uh with keith florian mckinney's brother in boston and we were talking about ego and you know the times where you like don't want to tap and stuff like that and he was like dude if you're not tapping you're not learning and you know i've heard lots of jiu-jitsu guys talk about that and and i love that i love a i love a culture where like you're encouraged to like take these fucking risks uh and and that you learn you know when i lost to the the kid who won silver and i really was i mean it was a really close match you know i lost and like i was bummed out for like a second and then i was like i went over to robert and like i was like oh what happened

like what could i have done and he told me and i went and fucking wrote it down and i was like all right next time that's what it's all about it's in competition is good look there's a lot of guys that i know that can tap me and i like rolling with them i like getting tapped i like to know what they're doing that can get me oh dude when someone hit me with like an awesome like crazy move yeah i just started laughing i'm just like what just how i just felt some dude on my back and then we rolled over twice and suddenly like he has like my arm like attached to my leg and i'm just like what what is this jamie when are you going to fight daniel tosh what i think uh daniel i heard heard he's not the easiest guy to pin down. He doesn't, I believe you're not allowed to make eye contact with him.

What did that happen? How did that whole thing happen? Before we get to that, why were you trying to fight some dude who was a congressman or a senator? Oh, right. What was that guy? Hold on. Let's back that up since it's on tape. I was not trying to fight a senator.

What were you trying to fight? This conservative pundit named Jonah Goldberg. And Jonah Goldberg is sort of like the stereotypical fucking huge, out of shape, bully Republican. Goes on every fucking news broadcast advocating that we just kill more brown people. But has never served. He really says we need just kill more brown people, but has never served. He really says we need to kill more brown people? No, but we need to invade Iraq.

That's a bold motherfucker. Invade Afghanistan. Invade all these brown-ish places. And it's fucked up, but no one ever – I mean people call him on his shit, but no one really calls him on his shit. Like, for example, he still has a career even though iraq and afghanistan failed like my my whole thing is if you advocate a war that has killed hundreds of thousands of people that's killed thousands of americans uh at the very least you should have to like when it comes to like the news sit the next war out you know what i mean like a fucking

baseball player who fucked up just like sit it out or at least like if he's going to go on tv and talk about how we need to bomb iran like under his name it should be like jonah goldberg dude who was wrong about iraq you know what i mean because yeah he just you say he was wrong about iraq but they do hollywood math on it and they'll tell you that it was a success for democratic societies all over the world because we removed an evil dictator and now they have a system in place that is far more superior. Evil dictators are. Look how many people died. I mean the place is a shitstorm. Yeah. Well I'm not saying that. What I'm saying is that a guy like that is

never wrong in his eyes. If you listen to conservative talk radio, which I do all the time just to go crazy, I listen to Patriot on Sirius. They call themselves the Patriot Radio. It's so bad. And it's just one dumb idea after another dumb idea about Christianity and God's law in this world. Well, and the thing is, we also have to remember, let's say even Iraq was a perfect society. That's not why we went there. We went there because under the rule of law we said we were attacked uh we said iraq was responsible for 9-11 i mean we didn't even go

over there and it's the same with iran you know the people who want more with iran aren't saying we want to make iran a democratic society they're saying these are the same people who hailed the iranian revolution they're saying that uh we are a threat or they are a threat to israel so we need to kill these guys and so he so this guy is talking all this shit. He wrote a book called Liberal Fascist, and he just gets to keep going on the news, keep writing books with incorrect information. So one day he's shitting on young people. He's saying that young people are stupid, you should raise the voting age.

He's right. Some young people are stupid, Joe. A lot. We should tase young people. We should make them read. Of course you should have to read. Maybe with an electric chair tied to. With a taser.

A video game. Every time they pick up a video game, it's an option. Once they've read ten books, they're allowed to kettlebell. Maybe they get a battle rope if you read three. Right, right. And so he said that, he said something. He said he was joking. He probably was. Maybe he wasn't. Where he goes, kids need these kids should have the socialism beaten out of them. And he used the word beaten out of them. There was a congressman who last week said that Muslims are still threatening us every day. And in his district, two mosques were attacked, right?

So it was like, to crazy people, this shit resonates. But even if it didn't resonate, it was just another example. Well, there's a big difference between kids and religious factions. It's been known to have suicide bombers. Don't know. Sure. I mean, to say that kids need to be smacked. Socialist kids. Right, of of course but it was another example because him being a cunt because he said right

because he's someone else who has who actually has said you know the muslim stuff so it's another example of just him and so all i did was i tweeted him and i said hey man uh so i would say about socialism i'm like socialist e i'm close i'm not really a socialist uh but you know close enough i'm 145 pound vegan uh there's over several tweets you know the joke about how do you tell if someone's vegan well what is it you uh or they tell you wait they'll tell you yeah yeah uh but i was like i was like he'll hate it he's he's one of the guys who compared uh who was like hitler was a vegetarian and called vegetarians Nazis. Which, by the way, means that – But first of all, you didn't expect this guy was really going to fight you.

Well, here's what I wanted. Again, I was talking to my wife, to Allison, and I was like, maybe he will, right? And she's like, no. Here is either situation. Oh, so to finish, I wrote a whole piece for Wonk Out about it and Huffington Post interviewed me. And essentially what I said was it can be regulated. We'll do it for charity. You have about 100 pounds on me. I know how to fight, but you can wear headgear. I won't wear any headgear. It'll be time rounds referee. I'll give it to Palestinians. You can buy like an Ayn Rand fuck doll or whatever you guys do with your money and it'll be great. like that and of course it was tongue-in-cheek in the sense that one of two things could happen he could be fucking crazy enough to do it which i doubt it because again you look at all these war hawks and these are people who have never served in wars who are sending other kids to go

die or he's gonna have to respond and just be exposed for being a fucking chicken shit which is what he is he's a fucking chicken shit i like you jamie and that's why i'm gonna tell you this i think it was a really dumb idea this is why i think it's a dumb idea shit. I like you, Jamie. And that's why I'm going to tell you this. I think it was a really dumb idea. Why is that? This is why I think it's a dumb idea. Go for it. Because first of all, you opened up the gate. And you said you would like to enact violence on him and kickbox with him.

You know he's not skillful at it. Agreed upon. Agreed upon kickboxing. That's not fair at all. Not jumping him in an alley. Even if he's 100 pounds heavier than you. If you're a skilled fighter, and you are, and you've been training for a long time, that's not fair. Not only is it not fair, it's kind of creepy.

It's kind of creepy. Hold on a second, man, for real. As a martial artist, you're not picking on another martial artist. You're picking on someone who you know is completely athletically inept. Someone who I know is not going to take the fight. Then don't do it because then you're opening up the gates to someone wanting to do that to you. No. And then the next thing is,

look, you're lefty, vegan, socialist-y bullshit. I've had enough of it. Right. I'm a 185-pound meat eater. How about I come smash your fucking face in? Right. And then why is that happening? Why is that happening?

Because you open up the door to challenging someone to a physical confrontation with violence. And that's what kickboxing is. Whether it's agreed upon or not, that is what it is. I mean, let's be honest with it. You're not even talking about jujitsu. You're talking about kickboxing. And let me tell you something, man. You're in a fight and you're going to hurt somebody. You're going to try to kick them and you're going to try to punch them with all your might. You're talking about assaulting the government as you don't you disagree with them i have had so many people in real life challenge me to fight after shares people like a

take if i was an asshole and and and and i've never sure you sure that you could take them but i don't know but looking at it was up there's a very cheap people i think that is how i know some rage people that the rest of the time i can shoot a double on you and smash your face and i think that you'd be shot wrestlers of the painane of my existence you should you'd be shocked at how many people out there who could kick your ass so how do you know you look at jiu-jitsu i'm like these like fucking five two brazilians who are like these like crazy black belts oh yeah but that's one of the reasons that i would never i would never fight uh i would never fight unless you're saying that you could you know

that you could take them but you're being nice and i'm saying you don't know of course i'm silly or i'll get the shit kicked out yeah so one of these things will happen neither of them are great You're saying that you know that you could take them, but you're being nice. And I'm saying, you don't know. Of course I am. It's being silly. I don't know. Or I'll get the shit kicked out of you. Yeah. So one of these things will happen. Neither of them are great. If I get the shit kicked out of me, I'm back in. Or even worse, you get in a fucking grueling, drawn-out brawl where no one can get in.

And he doesn't want to quit. And you've got to keep going. But does this make it on YouTube and get me more Twitter followers? But would you fight Tosh? For real? Yes, of course I would. Well, I wanted to point this out first before I went to the tosh thing so here's what i want to say but i wanted to obviously this dude is not going to take this fight obviously we're not going to fight obviously

and in in the whole uh in the article i wrote i was like i'm not encouraging a society of violence i don't think this is how you handle problems but i just wanted him to have to respond where it's like if you are going to be the one who starts the violent rhetoric. Because at no point did I say I challenge you to a fight. I said if you want to beat a socialist, I will volunteer. I understand. But do you not understand that that is a glaring like ego situation? Of course it is.

You are putting yourself in this champion role. Like you're going to step in. And you're putting so much attention on yourself with a statement like that and it's it completely changes just your opinion of what what you feel is wrong with his stances and it becomes a personal thing right between a man and another man who lives a different way and it it's it takes the attention away from the issue and it puts the attention on you as some sort of fucking Kim Kardashian figure. And that's – it's not the right way to approach it.

The only problem was no one – it was the first time that these fucking remarks and things got attention because – But it didn't get attention. It got attention amongst us. It didn't get attention in the real world. It was a publicity stunt. But it wasn't going to get – So you're saying by saying it him using that violent rhetoric and being able to use it uh ad nauseum and never being called on it like that's also publicity stunt and all i wanted to

do was draw attention where it's like look i did not start uh the violent rhetoric violence was never gonna happen it was just strictly a point that it's like all right man well if you're gonna go on and threaten kids right first of all he's not really threatening kids it's a complete figure of speech they need they how many people have said that these idiots today they need the fucking sense slapped into well he said don't advocate slapping people to make them smarter he said physically and then he paused and goes or literally and that's even better and then he just completely absolved it right away we see that and we And we're like, of course, like I said before, you're not going to fucking do it. But I mean, you look at some of these fucking crazy people. You look at like the monster.

You look at, you know, a lot of these fucking like right wing militia types like they're looking for people to fucking give them permission to do it. You look at the abortion clinics. And of course, I did not think I was going to be the fucking hero. There's going to be a fight. I was going to make this guy change all of his views all i wanted was finally someone just to be like if you're going to use his violent rhetoric just like if you're going to use this violent rhetoric in the middle east go fucking over there go say it to one of their faces go say it to someone who can actually defend themselves but i don't think that's violent rhetoric i disagree i think it's a figure of speech his career was the violent rhetoric and that was just the one where i'm like, okay, I can say I volunteer to be the socialist in the tongue-in-cheek fashion.

I really think you should never do that again. And I really think it's – Well, that wasn't going to be like my bit from now on. I'm going to be the guy who challenges people to fights. The only reason why people do it is for their own ego. I mean you're involving your own ability to do something, your own physical athleticism in with some debate where it totally doesn't belong. When you do something like that, it becomes an almost indefensible publicity stunt. Well, it is one of those things, though, when it's like –

You're introducing yourself into an argument. Sure. You're even involved in a debate with them. But at the same time, like, people have to do that. Like people have to, not to that extent I'm saying, but people have to, if there are people in the world who keep espousing violent rhetoric that does have consequences, that does lead us into wars, that does get people hurt. I'm not saying go challenge people to fights or anything like that, but sometimes you do have to do something to draw more publicity than like, if I just tweeted him and I was like, Hey man, that's fucked up rhetoric. up rhetoric or hey i don't think we should have gone to iraq it wouldn't have gotten as much

of the attention as it did um and so like sometimes you didn't accomplish anything you're you're saying you came close to missing you know it didn't accomplish anything you're you know you're saying well you came closer to missing this way but it was was a shot. And he had to respond. And he finally like, you know. Do you see my point? Yes. 100%. Does it make you embarrassed? A little bit. But at the same time, it's like, I guess I just want an answer of what to do.

Because I don't like that people can go on publicly and make livings with rhetoric that gets people killed. I agree. And it gets people hurt. I agree. And it gets people hurt. I agree. So it's like, sure, mine was a silly publicity stunt from a comedian, right? You know, did I think Jonah Goldberg was going to be like, oh, you know, I'm going to open up a shelter for Arabs

because, you know, that vegan showed me the way. But you didn't even act as someone who was protesting his point of view. You almost act like a heckler. You acted like someone who introduced yourself into the equation, your own physical prowess into the equation of, listen, if you think you're bad,

I'm going to represent socialists and I'm a vegan and I'm a lefty and I'm ready to fight you. Because my rhetoric was the same hyperbolic. What if he said yes? What if he said yes? He goes, come on, man, you little vegan pussy. Let's fucking fight.

And then you're going to fight and represent and represent him really if he was that into it You would really do it. I had headgear and a chair for charity if he was that into it. Mm-hmm You see do you see how that's kind of gross? Of course introduce yourself that would never happen It's busy exact same as someone writes a blog post someone writes a response blog post, right? I just used the hyperbolic language of fighting which he was the one who introduced into the conversation. It's not really, though. He's talking about children having the scent smacked into them,

which has been said throughout history. It's not a real, it's a figure of speech. It was the history of violence. It was the history of violence and rhetoric. I understand. And so that was just something where I was like, oh, like. It's hard for people to grasp that. You know that, right?

When you respond to one thing in particular, it better be warranted because people aren't going to take into account the history of someone's, you know, you know, obsession for violence. But I mean, it ended like I thought it would end where it was like it didn't begin. He had to respond. It was funny. No one got hurt. No one took it seriously. No one got hurt. No one took it seriously. And it was just kind of like, let's just remind people that this guy who has such authority, who can go on the news with such authority, without people even asking follow-up questions, even being like, you said the same thing about Iraq.

Do you think Iraq was a success? Blah, blah, blah. I mean, this was a guy who said they would be celebrating us in two years. Why don't you threaten to fight Ann Coulter? That would be a more fair-sized contest. I think Daniel Tosh, you've got the referee, Joe Rogan here. He doesn't like Daniel Tosh. Well, no, it's not that he doesn't like Daniel Tosh. We have to talk about you tweeted a bunch of shit that infuriated comedians

when Daniel Tosh said to a woman, she yelled out, if you don't know the whole story, this is the exact story. Daniel Tosh is on stage, and he was talking to the audience about, you know, what should he talk about next, and someone yells out rape. And he goes on, he starts saying, oh, yeah, like, that's funny.

And like, what's funny? The humiliation? What is it? The violence? He goes on this rant of all the things that are unfunny about rape at which point some woman yells out actually nothing is funny about rape right like to stop this conversation now just all self-righteously and he goes wouldn't it be funny if like five

guys raped her right now which is the comedian thing to say in that scenario and is in no way endorsing rape or rape of this woman but he had just gotten done in her thick fucking stupid head he had just gotten done saying all the things that are wrong with rape right and she is so unironically arguing with him still saying actually nothing it's funny about rape she's a fucking idiot and then she goes online and writes a blog about it. A huge, dumb, stupid, diarrhea-of-the-brain blog about what happened when she heckled Daniel Tosh. And he happened to say the one thing that a comedian would say in that scenario. When he's saying all these terrible things that are horrible about rape

and saying, of course he can't joke about rape because it's nothing funny. And then she self-righteously interjects, actually, rape is never funny. And he goes, wouldn't it be funny if five guys raped her? Okay. That is what started off. And you defended that woman. Right. So man, if you didn't like the Jonah Goldberg thing, prepare to be furious. It's always like such a wild adventure on Twitter after I do your show, because I get half people who I'm either friends or they will be fans for life there's like bro i'm like a jujitsu guy and like i'm really progressive and blah blah blah and then there's like hey uh vegan queer homo i work for blackwater and i'm gonna shoot you because i love rape jokes and it's like oh no so i'm about to get their lash here Here's what I think. If you talked to me five years ago, maybe even less,

I wouldn't have even thought about defending a heckler, especially because I have been heckled my entire career. I'm like, I think the YouTube clip of me with the most hits is me berating, meanly, a guy and a girl heckler. On my new CD, I had four dudes who heckled me, and it's a track. I just attacked, attacked, attacked. And when all I thought about, and when all I obsessed with, and when all I listened to was comedy, that was always the most important thing to me, right? It was the freedom of speech,

which I still believe in. it was no one censors a comedian you can make anything funny which i also still believe and uh that was it no matter how offensive whether it was the dane cook aurora joke whether it was tracy morgan the murdering the gay kid thing like it's just like dude comedy is comedy they're experimenting maybe it wasn't funny but whatever um but just like in like a political debate you know if you disagree with someone he challenged him to a fight and then you get yelled at um if you disagree with someone you should respond right i'm not talking about the girl i'm talking about me right now and then i'll talk about the girl who i also does not sound like she

would be a lot of fun to hang out with. And so ever since kind of doing more, reading more politics and comedy and getting involved in just different communities that weren't comedy, whether it's jujitsu, whether it's politics, activism, whatever, you know, as much as comedy, I love the art so much. It wasn't this like defend to the death thing as much because i saw that the world was like bigger than comedy i think there are a lot of comics who think that like this is it it's all about the comedy community you know and this is all we got no matter what we do we have to like

defend our own and that's a pretty absolute stance to take um in this particular situation though well so well here's what i was going to to say. Because that's not what anybody's saying. No. You're sort of building up a straw man defense. How so? Well, you know, by saying that, you know, by having someone who's arguing already the point that comedy should, that's not what anybody's saying.

No one is. Right now I'm describing exactly what I used to think. I mean, me, 100% me. Okay, so you used to think this way. Yes, totally. You used to think. I mean, me. 100% me. Okay, so you used to think this way. You used to think that comedy is most important, more important than people's happiness or feelings.

Fuck you. Comedy is more important. All I knew was comedy when I was not good at comedy. But now you disagree. And what do you disagree with? You think that now a woman should be able

to say something stupid and uninformed like that? No, I hate hecklers. I hate hecklers. But you supported her over Daniel Tosh. And you said... Here's what I said. a woman should be able to say something stupid and uninformed like that? No, I hate hecklers. I hate hecklers. I think hecklers should be – But you supported her over Daniel Tosh, and you said – No, here's what I said. You support heckling before you support rape culture.

That's what you said. Yes, 100%. Okay, but what does that mean? So I was heckled. For people who make it like a free speech issue, of course he has the right to say that. Just like – He doesn't just have the right to say it it was the thing to say that was funny it's not we believed in it it's not like we believed he really wanted people to rape her

of course he was saying something ridiculous and quick of course not of course not of course not right but why 100% then why did you tweet what you tweeted without saying that because when there are one in four girls who have been sexually assaulted or raped and those are just the ones that are reported right because it's the most unreported crime we have because largely uh people don't a lot of people don't take rape seriously there's a lot of victim blaming uh there's a lot i wish i wish it was really accurate to describe how many people don't report it but unfortunately it's not so when you say one in four there is a lot of fuckery when it comes to numbers like unreported unfortunately it's not. So when you say one in four, there is a lot of fuckery when it comes to numbers like unreported crimes.

Let's say... By the way, I'm not saying this in that people are not being victimized. They unquestionably are. I'm saying that when you get into weird numbers like unreported numbers, there's a reason why you can't use those. No, no, no, those are the reported numbers. One in four is reported? Yes, one in four is reported.

25% of all women have been raped. Yes, or sexually assaulted. Really? Not raped, sexually assaulted. Is that true? Sexually sexually sexually are you sure about that punch it up okay what percentage of women have been sexually assaulted and a lot of them uh not enough no and a lot of them uh you know we all probably uh at least statistically know know someone who was. There's probably someone in the audience who was. And, you know, Daniel Tosh, I think comedians should push boundaries 100%. It's close. It's one in every six. It's 14%.

It's the one I saw was one in every six. It's a lot. 2.8% attempted rape. There's a lot of dudes suck at rape. And there's a lot of pressure. See, you giggled. That's fucking, and you made giggled that's fucking that's and you made a tagline to it that's rape jokes because you just contributed to rape culture

dude i went on fucking msnbc and talked about i did 15 minutes on rape last night but you see that that what you did by saying that that you would rather someone heckle you than than contribute to rape culture right what the fuck is rape so I still have to explain this yeah so if we're gonna talk about freedom of speech I in Texas had a dude literally run to the stage it was my closing bit too all you do is wait ten fucking seconds and say if you keep I closed on a thing against the war I said if you keep doing that I'm gonna kick your ass so that's actually like violating freedom of speech this girl fucking heck old dumb heck And she left this dude is saying,

if you keep talking, I'm going to kick your ass. Right. And I wasn't like, I wish you got fucking shot in Iraq. Right. I dealt with how the situation was weird. Um,

okay. But this is your situation. Let's not confuse the issue by bringing in a whole nother story. But I just want to preface it that I fucking loathe hecklers and I've been heckled my entire career. That's not just heckling. You were threatened. I was threatened. But I've also been heckled.

I've had shit thrown at me. You know, I'm not a fan of audience participation. So why did you support that woman? Because to me, rape culture is the fact that because rape is dealt with so lightly in this country, lots of women don't report it.

Lots of women don't report simple sexual assault. Fucking dude comes up, grabs your tits at a club because she doesn't want to be called a slut. She doesn't want to be called drunk. She doesn't want to defend herself when she feels like she was assaulted, right? And so to me in that moment, as much as I care about comedy, you know, when I started reading a lot of progressive blogs,

when they talk about rape, there's something called a trigger warning. In the beginning of the article, it says trigger warning. And I never knew what that meant, but that means that some girls have been so fucking traumatized, or guys have been so traumatized

after being raped that they can't read about it. They'll have fucking flashbacks, so you have to put this trigger warning on top. And so to me, it's like, I don't know, man. If it comes down to, and there were feminists that I went on TV with, like feminist writers who are demonized as these humorless cunts who were fucking quoting Sarah Silverman, the Wanda Sykes rape bit, the Carlin rape bit. There are definitely ways to do it.

But if there is a girl in an audience, even that girl who heckled, if she was fucking raped, and even if Tosh is totally 100% kidding, which he was, and says, wouldn't it be funny if five guys rape you? You know what?

I do think that that girl having a fucking flashback or any girl in that audience having a fucking rape flashback, I'm like, it's not worth a bit. And there's so much stuff with rape that you can talk about that you can make funny um and i think that all topics in comedy should be addressed and i think the best comedians are the ones that can address those really edgy topics but if it's going to be like a sloppily it would be funny if you were raped. And there are almost definitely girls in that audience who have been raped. This is not something he's constructing.

He's responding to someone saying something really stupid about rape. That completely limits the amount of subjects he can respond with. He has to respond with something that applies to rape. But again, I didn't with the military. There are tons of other comics who have dealt with hecklers who have done it in other ways. Well, you didn't because someone wanted to kick your ass. Someone ran up to the stage and wanted to kick your ass. are tons of other comics who have dealt with hecklers who have done it in other ways and well you didn't because someone wanted to kick your ass someone ran up to the stage and wanted to kick your ass you realize you were in danger that's completely facetious to say that you

didn't do it for noble reasons no but i mean to say that this guy that his his idea with him saying don't you think it would be funny if five guys raped her like now? He's not supporting rape. And if you are that sensitive, you do not belong in a comedy club. If the word rape will send you into a fucking panic, I feel sad for you. You are very unfortunate that this has happened to you. Maybe a comedy club is not the best place for you. Maybe you should go somewhere else

where it is in a 100% uncensored ride through the mind and imagination of Daniel Tosh not to be interrupted by a moron. And when that moron does interrupt with something completely non-ironic, ridiculous. He was saying that rape is bad. Of course, but let's say that she was, hypothetically. Tough shit. Hypothetically, she should shut her fucking mouth when she's at a comedy club. No, but I'm saying, if you have been traumatized to a situation where you could be fucking enjoying your night at the comedy club, right?

And I'm not saying this is well-suited. We don't know who she is. Let's say she was enjoying her night at the comedy club. She was raped in a horrible fucking fashion. Not that there's, like, a pleasant way. Very unfortunate. And if he was saying what he was saying. No, and then that just fucking comes out.

That's just an emotional response. You remember, remember like she needs to grow the fuck up and that's when when a guy says something like that to you and it's gross and everybody laughs and it's ridiculous when you don't you go home and write a blog you don't need people supporting you because you're an idiot and that's why it happened that's ptsd shit i'm like you can't if somebody gets she didn't say in her blog that she was raped she said in her blog that she felt offended that he would joke around about rape no i was talking about uh you were saying ptsd what's the hypothetical doesn't work on her let's say that girl was look if that girl did write that in her blog it'd be a totally different blog by warranting and justifying this moronic opinion

on you know someone having an ad lib to deal with a heckler, what you're doing is you're supporting the idea that the positive idea behind not raping someone is more important than a show. It's more important than jokes. It's more important that you never bring up the idea that rape can be funny. Because then you're limiting that topic. That's the opposite I said.

If rape can ever be funny, it can be funny for a heckler that's not again that's the opposite of what i said but if rape can ever be funny it can be funny when you know a someone is not being serious about it and two someone is talking about her rape isn't funny that automatically makes it funny if they're a heckler if a heckler talks about rape not being that funny ever and then the comic says, wouldn't it be funny if somebody raped her? You know he doesn't mean that. His intent is not that a bunch of people should storm and rape. But that is the correct thing for him to say. But again...

When you're dealing with a nightclub comedian and people are drinking alcohol, that would be funny. When I wrote that tweet, that was after... Do you see my point at all? Yes. And what's the difference between Miss Rachel Rape listening to this podcast and having a flashback right now? You know, we didn't give her any kind of rape warning before we did this podcast.

All you're talking about is rape. This is like crazy rape talk. But I'm also not saying like, hey, Rachel, you specifically, I hope you get raped. But she also. He didn't really mean that she should get raped. What he was doing was being a stand-up comedian in a fucking club where one person has to chime in their dumb shit here here's when i wrote that the the tweet you when it first happened i i essentially retweeted the article and said something like well that was fucking shitty uh because that's how i felt i didn't care that much

about it i was like that's another comic who's you know whatever when i started getting started getting really upset and writing the angrier tweets and writing more and more about it. Is it when you listen to people who are reading the tweets and you're like, this is a good opportunity? I am so mad right now. Maybe I should start a fight with rape. Ask rape if rape wants to kick butt. I just didn't understand why this was like our hill to die on. Like comics don't have fucking health insurance. Comics have not really united around much.

And it was just so bizarre. People didn't rally around fucking Dane Cook the next week for the Aurora shooting. You know what I mean? When he made jokes about that, there was no big... It was just that people were just so... The tweets I was getting were crazy.

I mean, I was watching these bloggers who have blogged about being rape survivors retweeting these people who – like these amateur comics and people like that who thought if they fucking tweeted some rape survivor, fucking Daniel Tosh would be friends with them or let them like open for him. They were tweeting like, I hope you get raped and just like more fucking rape threats. Well, you introduced yourself into the argument. Again, you introduced yourself and your opinion into the argument, so you were judged. You said that you feel that you would rather be heckled than contribute to rape culture. You introduced you into the argument. But I'm fine with that. So, of course, you're going to get whiplash.

Of course, you're going to get backlash or blowback. No, I'm not saying about me. I'm saying that when you have these... No, I actually didn't get it that bad. I mean, this is the first time I've... But you just said you did. You were just telling blowback. No, I'm not saying about me. I'm saying that when you have these – no, I actually didn't get it that bad. I mean this is the first time I've – So you just said you did. You were just telling us about – No, no, no.

I said bloggers, feminist bloggers who have written about being rape survivors were getting rape threats. But you got a lot of like shitty tweets too. I mean I got some shitty tweets. Yeah, for sure. But like that's fine. But you're not shocked. It's not about – no. Because at no point was I trying to make this one.

The Jonah Goldberg thing was one thing. But this I wasn't trying to make about me. The Jonah Goldberg? That's the other guy? It's not about – no. Because at no point was I trying to make this one – the Jonah Goldberg thing was one thing. But this I wasn't trying to make about me. The Jonah Goldberg? That's the other guy. That's the dude, yeah. I just wanted the people who follow me to know that like – because most comics defended it. And so I just wanted girls to know that I'm like – if you've been through this. I don't. I don't.

I don't think that's funny. Rape is never funny. Real rape. Unless it's at the all-star. This is just a work. It's just a piece of work. Right. It's a piece of fiction that he's creating to deal with the environment of a stand-up comedy club where he's being forced to live ad-lib.

But again, when I started talking about rape culture, it wasn't specifically when I half-heartedly retweeted the Gawker article about Taj. It was about the responses that people started to get that were so violent, and not in a comedy club setting, but just like personal fucking threats that a lot of the girl journalists in my timeline were

retweeting about just dudes saying like, so they would say something critical of Taj, and then they would say, well, you should get fucking raped. Right saying like so they would say something critical of tosh and then they would say well you should get fucking raped right and where the women would say something critical about tosh yeah women journalists like what were they saying what were they saying that just like wrote a piece about it and like would contrast like what tosh said to like the wanda sykes rape joke or the carlin rape joke and like they analyzed it because they're fucking dumb they have to be to actually analyze that the whole thing is so simple but i'm like that that's what they do they're media critics they uh they be to actually analyze that. The whole thing is so simple. But I'm like, that's what they do. They're media critics.

They analyze TV. They analyze, like, that's just what they do. They write about popular culture. And a lot of times they do it because that's their job and they need something to talk about. Right. So they pick a side or they pick a stance that might not necessarily be logical. Right, but the response isn't necessarily be like,

I'm going to tell that person I hope they get raped. You know what I mean? Like, that's just one of those things isn't necessarily be like, I'm going to tell that person I hope they get raped. You know what I mean? Like that's just one of those things where it's just like I have written stuff that so many people disagree with. I've never gotten rape threats. You've probably never gotten rape threats. Buckle up, son, because they're on the way. You're going to get some death squad rape threats. Yeah, you've already had seven today.

You haven't checked your Twitter since we've been on this podcast. It's coming, son. It's just in one big letter. It just says rape. Rape, rape, rape, rape. 140 characters. But yeah, man. I'm like, I just don't think we know what that's like.

Yeah, we don't. You know what they don't know what it's like? They don't like trying to get through a fucking show on Friday night and some dummy has to yell out something stupid. It doesn't make sense. But again, I'm like, you can deal with that. We both not what you're not yeah guess what he dealt with it and in my opinion he dealt with it the right way and that's not being pro-rape it's just being words these are words there's not it's not actions and it's not in support of rape in any way shape or fashion it's a joke and if you can't realize he's, you are unfit to listen to other human beings talk.

I don't know, man, but that's the thing that you— If you're influenced by that, if you're influenced by Daniel Tosh saying, would it be funny if she got raped by five people? If you're influenced by that, you are clearly mentally incapable of communicating with people. I don't know, man. You should be removed from society. Both me and you have heard jokes that were like, that sucks. That wasn't a bad joke, dude.

Right? No, no, no. I'm saying everyone is subjective. And if you've been through a certain thing in your life, if you've been threatened with rape, or if you have been raped, or if you've been assaulted, or if you live in a culture where a lot of fucking girls are raped, that you have to think about walking home by yourself and shit like that. Maybe that shit's not as funny to you. And that's okay. Just like it's okay for him to say what he wants to say. It's okay for that girl to get offended. It's okay for him to say what he wants to say. It's okay for that girl to get offended.

It's okay for me not to think it's fucking funny. It's okay for you to think it was the right thing to say. Like all of this stuff is fine. I'm just saying that if I were given the choice, not in this Tosh situation, because everything I wrote and – You said – dude, you criticized it and said that you sometimes are embarrassed of your gender. Of course i am when you have when you when you have girls how are you that are afraid to go to the fucking park because they're gonna get raped yeah guys can be fucking creepy right but that's when you have dudes who

are that's not the hold on stop first of all if you say that one in six does that mean one in six men rape is that does it mean that as well? Because if that's the case, I'm embarrassed about that part of humanity. Of course. But not my fucking gender. Joe. That's ridiculous. You're a comic.

You've used, like, hyperbole. It's fucking Twitter. Exactly, which is why him saying that someone being raped by five people being funny should also, whatever, did he say seven? Seven. Well, no, he said five. Tosh said five. I was waiting for you to be like

Oh, you had to insert that seven, you fucking hit you with a water bottle. It's his new thing. He says seven all the time. There was part of me hoping that you would be like, seven? He's a child. I work with a child. I was semi-praying for him to say seven. You saying that that I should be able to

recognize her verbally, why don't you recognize it with T saying you should be right i do i do because i'm a fucking comedian right then why are you ever supporting because i rec i recognize it me personally just like you recognize it just like i recognize that religion is silly you do you're saying you're protecting the world from idiots being influenced i'm not protecting the world i'm voicing my opinion that if i had the choice between there's a fucking rape survivor there who could get a triggered flashback or like, you know, talk about rape in a different way

because again, like I don't think it's fucking funny. I've already burned the comedy bridges. We might as well go all the way with it. I don't think it's funny to, personally, I think it's easy and I think it's a cop out

to joke about people who are already shit on. To me, I don't think it's edgy-out to joke about people who are already shit on to me I don't think it's edgy I don't think you can compare rape jokes to fucking prior no no no rape survivors okay but you're saying rape survivor when he made a rape joke she's not a rape survivor man no I'm saying in the audience but she's the victim she's the person who got said that word to what about the audience right now of this podcast, though? I don't get that. Exactly.

There's tons of fucking people probably sitting around shaking. Yeah, you don't have a problem with that. This is a bullshit argument. It really is. No, because we're actually talking about the issue, because it's an issue that's important to be talked about. Again, I didn't read anyone, and I certainly wasn't saying anyone. You can't talk about rape.

Don't say the word rape. Look, murder is horrible. Robbery is horrible. Armed robbery. Car robbery. murder is horrible robbery is horrible armed robbery car robbery. Everything is horrible It doesn't mean just because it exists You can never talk about it because out of fear when someone someone in the audience may have experienced it when someone gets fucking murdered You're not like what was she what was he wearing before he got murdered rape is the one listen

No, that's not listen to you That's bullshit because if someone gets murdered someone can say you shouldn't have been in there. You should have been in that neighborhood. And what if the person who knows the person who's been murdered, who had to work in a bad place to support their family, hears you say that? It's the same fucking subject. When you're joking around on stage, especially in a situation where Tosh did, where it's a complete ad lib, for you to analyze it in that way

and come up with he's contributing to rape culture is preposterous. I don't know, man. I still stand by it because I just don't give a shit, again, in comparison. And this isn't a heckler issue for me anymore. Like, I don't like people who heckle, right? I hate it. I hate it. And I don't think that Daniel Tosh wanted that girl to get raped, right?

I don't think that Daniel Tosh wanted that girl to get raped. Right? But I just don't give a shit about comedy enough that if I'm on stage and I say something that could cause someone in the audience or multiple people in the audience because I'm not doing it in a way that's attacking, I don't know, like a higher – like no one's sitting around being like, you know who's had it too good for too long? Rape victims. Like I wish someone would fucking talk about them like i just think there are smarter ways to fucking do it and i'm not a fan of it and if i what if he said i would have i would hope the chimps would eat your face is that okay well because we don't have a history of women getting one in six girls haven't had their face what if that woman in the audience

was in the audience who got her face eaten up by a chimp and everybody laughed? Look at me. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. That would be so funny. A tragic coincidence. If she got her face bitten up by a chimp. But we don't fucking live in a world where women are afraid to go to the police to report a fucking chimp incident because they're going to be like, well, did you used to fuck the chimp? I understand that.

Were you drinking when you were getting together with the chimp? That's a good point. You know what I mean? And that is, to me, when i say culture i'm not talking about daniel tosh i'm not talking about a comic who talks about rape i'm saying that it was just so fucking bizarre to me that with all of the shit uh that comics have not gathered around that it was like the rape joke like i i just like an not what they gathered around I don't know man They gathered around someone protesting him

Shutting down a heckler And saying that rape is completely off subject But how is he getting Why was she yelling out anything I went on the fucking liberal station Hosted by That's why it happened That's why the whole thing happened

She's a moron Hecklers are morons I went on a liberal station. That's why it happened. Hosted by a woman. That's why the whole thing happened. She was a moron. Right. Hecklers are morons. Right. Not only is she a heckler. She's a heckler that didn't even understand what he was saying. Sure. But again, if I were raped, maybe I would act quickly and hastily about a subject that's affected my life so much in such a tragic

way. And again, I don't want to make this depending on the fucking heckler. She didn't write that in her blog and that's what everybody responded to. It became an issue because she wrote this blog. That's why it became an issue. Not sending the blog off to these websites. It was her fucking personal blog. Yeah, but it fucking

became viral and that's why it became an issue that you talked about. Sure, but again you saying that like i don't think rape should ever be mentioned like the feminist you're saying that you think rape can be funny right you think that juana sykes can say it and make it funny 100 okay why didn't tosh make it funny there it sounded funny to me because it was used in the same way that rape is used in the sense just to shut someone up it was used wow it was rape is not used to shut people up that's the sense just to shut someone up it was used it was rape is not used to shut people up that's a crazy way to shut people up it's a power don't shut up i'm gonna rape you no but it's no but i mean it's psychologically been proved that it's not

about it's not it's not about being horny it's a crime it's a psychological crime that's a crazy comparison and i don't buy that either it's about both if it was just about controlling someone they would hold you down they fuck you because it's power and sexual at the same time i don't buy that either it's about both if it was just about controlling someone they would hold you down they fuck you because it's power and sexual at the same time i don't know people have some creepy thing when it comes to physically empowering being physically uh overpowering a person and and and fucking them and having sex with them my whole thing is like i'm a comic i've been heckled i know what it's like to be heckled I'm not a female I haven't been raped I don't know what it's like and if it comes down to a fucking dude who was not censored who still has his number one show on Comedy Central who still plays at the club no one not a lot of people wanted him

censored a lot of people wanted him fired the chair from the I didn't I didn't call fucking station I did because it's not my fucking job you said support a comic just because I happen to be a comedian when I don't call fucking station because it's not my fucking job. You said support a comic just because I happen to be a comedian when I don't. But you said he's contributing to rape culture. I think that whole situation 100 percent. I think what we're doing, I think right now making putting the onus on women that they're uptight bitches. Do you know what a slippery slope this is that you are? You are literally condoning censorship?

I'm not. You're saying that people's words can affect actions. So you're saying someone completely joking around about rape can support rape. It is ridiculous. It is a ridiculous statement. But that's not at all what I'm saying. That's what you're saying. That is what you're saying.

Not at all. Listen, man. If you say that he's contributing to rape culture by saying that with his mouth, by joking around in a way that absolutely we all know

he wasn't serious, five guys are just going to jump out and rape her. But again, that would be funny. That's not what he's saying. He's making a joke

and you're saying that contributes to rape culture. So what you're saying is his words should be censored because they contribute to rape. Bullshit. Youored because they contribute to all that bullshit You're saying they contribute to rape shit because I never said take him off the air

I never said so he has to stop you're still saying he contributes to rape No, I didn't say you contributed to rape culture right because what fucking what does that mean if he's not contributing to race you go? On fucking Twitter during those days and all of his fans started threatening girls with rape That's fucking rape culture rape culture is women being in constant fucking fear because dudes are fucking threatening them because dudes are writing and saying, well, I see where you fucking live and I'm going to rape you. That is rape culture.

That's not a culture, dude. That's idiots. This idea that he is somehow or another contributing to that by even mentioning the word rape. You can't stop someone from being a fucking idiot. And by not saying a joke about a subject doesn't keep other morons from using that subject whenever they freely want. It's just it comes up at any time.

They're allowed to have their reactions and start saying, oh, I'm going to fucking rape you, bitch. That doesn't mean you should never talk about rape. And so for you to say that in that moment, he shouldn't bring it up because he's contributing to a bunch of fucking apes yelling rape at women on Twitter or Facebook or whatever they're completely unrelated completely unrelated would not have done it if there wasn't so much fucking know those dudes would not have done if there wasn't a fucking blog written by some

one woman who all of a sudden everybody and you had to comment on but then it becomes a part of the national discourse same shit where no no no no no no no it is well it's true it is her fault she should have shut her fucking mouth one and she should not run a dumb blog about it a diarrhea of the mouth blog about it where she didn't take any personal accountability for interrupting a show with a fucking rabid stand-up comedian in mid-stride in his fucking prime on stage in Hollywood on a Friday night or a Saturday night, whatever the fuck it was. I don't know, dude. This is what it is, okay? She's interrupting the show. You're caught in the crossfire. You took a hit. It wasn't real,

dummy. If he said he hopes a unicorn comes down and drowns you with his piss, is that real? Come on. We're not talking reality here. We're talking jokes he's not contributing to has been drowned by a unicorn unicorn piss unicorn piss i'm sorry look it's it's nonsense it's nonsense and how many of these people that unreported like the what what one out of seven or whatever people you know didn't report it because they had orgasms there could be some kind of weird fucking number like that in there that just totally voids the whole number anyway well that's might not be it i'm gonna let that hang uh jamie i you know i think if anything makes people say stupid shit like i hope you get raped it's when people stand up for someone who says something like rape should never be talked about but or like rape shouldn't have been discussed. You keep saying I said that, but like on TV.

I didn't say you. I'm just saying, you're talking about a rape culture. So whenever you step in and say, I support this over rape culture, there's a bunch of idiots who, you're introducing yourself into the sea of humanity. And you're shocked when some people bounce back at you. You're shocked because that's what you're doing you're introducing your ideas you're acting like a one i'm like one of

like five comedians who said something that we're the reason that these girls started getting rape threats like that's crazy that's not what i'm saying at all i'm saying that you said that daniel tosh contributes to rape culture and i'm telling you that whole situation i thought you know what did you know what did you You know what did? You entering the discourse. That actually contributed to people who think, who people who get annoyed at like lefty vegans, and they want to go, you fucking queer hope you get raped. You're right. You're right.

Isn't that your rape culture though? They weren't saying that to me. They were saying that to fucking girls. I'm sure they said it to you. Check your timeline, son. Well, now they are. I'm sure they said it to you. Check your timeline, son. Well, now they are. I'm sure they said it then. I'm sure a certain amount of people who read what you said had some sort of a negative response to you.

There's no denying that, right? Luckily, a lot of your people who are mad at me, I check my Twitter. They're not putting a period before my name. So it's only going to me. It's like, Jamie Kilstein, everyone a period oh they have to put a period before you otherwise it only goes yeah they i think they want to talk to you dude oh this one's kind of funny jamie kilstein beat me up in a kickboxing match and then rape me and then hashtag the rape culture but do you do you feel me on this man do you know what i'm trying to put some sense into your head because you're being silly.

And you're opening yourself up to unwarranted and unnecessary criticism. It can be avoided. It can all be avoided by being a little bit harder on yourself, man. And not introducing yourself into these things. I mean, and so, I mean, your people already think. This is not my people, man. I'm not running a cult. No, no, no. I don't have yet. We're buying a town'm – This is not my people, man. I'm not running a cult. No, no, no.

I don't have – There are people – We're buying a town in Nevada. I don't know, man. We should go to Portland, right? I got way too many – I'm thinking about starting a cult in Portland. That's the place to do it.

You got way too many white men. I have way too many people who were raped who tweeted me and was like, I'm glad to see that a comment. Stop, stop, stop. They'll be happy if you talk about fucking water sucking. I don't know, man. You talk about a certain amount of things, there's going to be a giant group of people that support you.

It doesn't mean that you're right. I mean, we're going to disagree on this, right? For sure, disagree on this. Every fucking comedian in the world disagrees with you. But I'm like, I don't care. You know what that is, though.

As a comic, you understand what's going on. It's not that comedy means much to you. It's in human interaction, man. It's when you're in a movie and some guy's on his fucking phone talking. Shut up, bitch. You're fucking up the show. It's real simple.

What Tosh did is stop what was fucking up the show. It had nothing to do with rape or contributing to rape culture. Again, when something like what you just said happens, people don't galvanize around that. They shouldn't. They should galvanize around putting a picture of her and say, see this bitch? She doesn't understand humor. She can't take a joke.

So she'd be a photo of her with a red line across her face. Until you can come in and explain to us that you're sorry, that you didn't understand how he was joking around about how nothing can be funny about rape, and you just blurted it out because you're a self-righteous dummy who thinks that you should be able to espouse your politically correct opinions at any fucking time they're warranted in your silly little fucking dumb mind, including hijacking a fucking comedy club, you're not capable of handling a comedy club. You shouldn't be there. Just like if your ears hurt when things are loud, you shouldn't go to a fucking comedy club, you're not capable of handling a comedy club. You shouldn't be there. Just like if your ears hurt when things are loud, you shouldn't go to a fucking rock club.

If you're scared of violence, you shouldn't sit front row at a UFC fight. It's all the same. It's not like we should nerf the world to make it safe for everybody. If you don't enjoy someone talking about controversial shit, you certainly shouldn't go to an adult nightclub that's doing stand-up comedy, where a guy like Daniel fucking Tosh, who has one of the most edgy shows on TV, period, is doing his stand-up, and he makes a joke because you heckle, and that joke happens about what you heckled about. You can't feel like you're a victim, because you're not a victim.

You're a dummy who doesn't belong in a comedy club. Right. Well, again, I'm not defending the heckling. I went to see Guns N' Roses and my ears hurt. You're stupid. If your ears are sensitive, you don't stand next to the fucking speaker. If you don't like watching dudes get their ass kicked,

don't go to a UFC fight. If you don't like black people, don't watch basketball. It's really simple. It's really simple. And when you introduce yourself, if you introduce yourself into the equation like that woman did, you gotta take the hit. You gotta take the hit.

But again, like you thought it was, you know, and we were talking about how good it is when people stand up and protest these fucking politicians and stuff. You disagree with this. So of course you, and again, I disagree with that. This isn't a politician, man. We both disagree with this. This is a stand up comedy show. This isn't someone dictating policy or changing the way people live their lives.

It's someone who's cracking jokes on stage trying to make people laugh. But again. It's someone who interrupts that process because they're dumb. And I hate that. And I agree with you. You're crazy for supporting. You're fucked up. You should have wrote something a lot more detailed then.

You should explain yourself in great depth. That is 140 characters on Twitter. Well, you shouldn't do it on Twitter. You should link to a blog because this is something that can't be covered in this short attention span. No, I get mad at people who write dumb blogs. I love well-written, honest blogs. I get mad at dumb people who heckle and write a blog about how they're shocked that someone could joke around about that. By the way, I heard the joke killed.

I heard most of the audience laughed really hard. They thought it was hilarious. You know why? It was. laughed really hard they thought it was hilarious because you know why it was that's because because it was joe check uh check this out somebody told me to play this joy reed all right what is it who did those red jokes well i would say backing up completely i would i would like to argue the point that that wasn't even a joke he was making a statement oh so you're even a joke. He was making a statement. Oh, Tosh. So you're at a comedy club, you're making a statement. It's fair game for an audience member to go, I disagree with your statement. Because there's been varying reports on this.

Yes, of what happened. Of what happened. That's Liz Winstead talking, by the way. And I find this very interesting. I have more about that later. Especially when talking about it from a comics lens. And he said that Daniel Tosh got on stage and said,

what would you guys like to talk about? Now that opens up a conversation with your audience. And somebody yelled rape. And I don't know if it was this woman or someone else said, no, rape jokes are never funny. And then all of a sudden, boom,

if that happened, then yeah, you asked the audience what they thought and people said something. Okay, pause that. Pause that right there. Pause that right there then yeah, you asked the audience what they thought and people said something. Okay, pause that. Pause that right there. Pause that right there. Because first of all, she's not telling the truth because she's omitting a very important part of why he said that to her. And she's doing that to make her point make more sense. She omitted the fact that he was saying, oh yeah, rape is real funny. Like what's funny about rape? Is it the humiliation?

Is it the violence? Stop, hold on. That was the story of the time. Liz Winstead, no, no, no. Then don't talk. Then don't talk about it if you don't know the full story. So Liz Winstead interjected, or rather edited, the actual reality of the conversation

and cut out the part where he was detailing what is not funny about rape to make it seem like what he did was more insensitive. If she said, I guarantee you, if someone said rape, and then a woman said, actually, rape is never funny, and he said, well, wouldn't it be funny if five guys raped her right now? Guess what? That's still funny. You know why? Because he's not being serious.

If she's self-righteously yelling out, actually, rape is never funny, it's right for him again to say, wouldn't it be funny if she got raped by five people? He's joking. He's not being fucking serious. Just like when you see a guy in a movie and he's shooting at aliens, he's not really in an alien war. It's fucking entertainment. And what she did by omitting that very particular part is make it more heinous

and yet I still agree with him and I disagree with her and her saying that it's not a joke is Ridiculous and I have a Liz Winstead story from when I was an open mic er that I'd like to share with you This is where it gets really interested when I was an-er, and I was not that good a comedian, I was fucking two or three times on stage, and Liz Winstead already had been on HBO, and she was hosting an open mic night, and I'm not trying to hold her to the fire for this, okay? But this is something that happened. It happened more than 20 years ago. She's on stage, she had her friend Janine DiTullio, who was a very funny comic from Boston, and they're all paddling around backstage, this whole girls club.

And they were having a great time. And she said, she got on stage and she said, I'm hosting Open Mic Night. And when I'm here hosting Open Mic Night, I've got rules. Here's the rules, okay? No jokes about this. No jokes about that. No jokes about tits. No sexism.

She says no sexism. She says no gay jokes. She has a list she's reading, and she decides that she's going to interrupt the stand-up comedians while they're on stage and stop them from performing their jokes and interrupt them because she decides that a joke is racist. She decides a joke is sexist So there's a door next to the stage so the comedians are on stage, and she's getting on stage and interrupting individual performance stop stop stop that sexist so he this guy Brian I forget his fucking name. He was a very funny guy, but he was I forget his fucking name.

He was a very funny guy, but he was particularly shy. And he was an open miker, a career open miker. He was a guy that had been doing, are you checking your Twitter, bitch? Pay attention. He was a guy who would struggle to keep it together on stage every time. And he was a very gifted comic writer, but a very uncomfortable performer. He had a really hard time performing. gifted comic writer but a very uncomfortable performer he had a really hard time performing so he goes on stage and he has this joke where he says um something about um i always make sure i open up the car door for my hooker and liz winstead interrupts stop stop stop sexism and he says and don't think he doesn't appreciate it

which is his punch line okay so she's standing on stage right after he says that and she stopped him and he's so awkward he's got his eyes closed during his his fucking thing i mean it's it's just it's so fucking annoying. It's driving me crazy. So, I get on stage, okay? And I'm in the middle of something, and she comes out and says, Sexism, stop, stop. And I said, Liz, don't you get enough fucking attention? I go, you go on stage every night, you have this HBO special,

you're a national headliner, and yet you can't let an open-miker have five minutes to try to say whatever the fuck they want to say you have to come on and interrupt and so she says to me you know i know the people who own this club i'll just let you know right now this is not this is 100 real and i said that's it really i go that's what you're telling me you're a professional fucking comedian and i have a very good point about you needing attention and interrupting sets. And you tell me that you know the people who booked this club, insinuating that you can stop me from working here. I go, fucking really?

I go, I'm done. And so I walked off the stage. I put the microphone down and I walked off the stage. And I'll never forget that. And so listening to that lady, just understand and judge that. Because that's a true thing that happened to a, oh, of course it does. But that's a true thing that happened

to a open mic comic by a professional headliner comedian. This is the point where sexism can bounce the other way. And it becomes nonsense. It becomes you enforcing your ideology on other people and you, it's not about being fair and right and running a just, happy society where people are allowed creative differences.

No, it's about you enforcing your own ego and bullshit on other people. Yeah, and I mean, it was one of those things where, like... Let's listen to the rest of what she has to say. And then the club owner issued a statement, and I find this very interesting, especially when talking about it from a comics lens. And he said that Daniel Tosh got on stage and said what would you guys like to talk about now that opens up a conversation with your audience said something so it's not it's not quite the same thing as being heckled I'll be a heckle for a joke you told yeah I was

the joke it wasn't it like the equivalent of if there was one black guy in the room and he had said you know wouldn't be funny if everybody just lynched that guy right now because a joke as it is an attack on that person because he was obviously angry at that hold on stop That stop that you know stupid that is because that's ridiculous because it's not like she was the only woman in a room full of men That's so dumb What a fucking people are so stupid with their analogies what that would be the same if there was one black guy And everybody's like let's go get him. How the fuck is that the same? How the fuck is that the same? Why is everybody so goddamn crazy?

And why do so many people want to cry victim when they're just stupid? This is not a victim issue. This is a stupid person issue. I mean, I think it comes down to she disagreed with him we disagree on how she handled it i disagree with you you disagree with me but it's like what do you disagree with me oh just about the whole rape the thing you've been yelling at me about for what about disagree with what you you've never disagreed well the fact that i'm not you honestly never have because i've told you that i don't think that he contributes to raping people, and you're saying that you didn't say that. I do not think he contributes to raping people. But you're saying that he contributes to rape culture, and I'm saying what the fuck is that then?

Well, and that's what I was telling you. It's the fact that we live in a culture where women who have been raped aren't allowed to, the way we're saying it, go to comedy clubs because they might get offended and i'm saying that i think that that sort of sucks for them considering they were fucking raped and now they have to watch where they go that's when like that was you're gonna have to take away every single thing that people have been victimized from and take it out of the vocabulary in the vernacular of comedy then because then everything like i've been beat up before have you been beat up you've been robbed with a gun that's way worse than getting a John Brian's been robbed the gun and he was fucking freaking out every time he was in a parking lot for months afterwards And I know that's true

But you know what he can still go to a comedy club and know about the time where he almost lost his life with a Gun in his fucking face and if someone jokes about robbery he should be able to laugh at that I would take rape after over getting getting that happened to me again unless someone yeah Well, I would I would get raped before getting that happen to me again. Unless someone, yeah. I would. I would get raped before getting robbed by a gun again. Would you really? Yes. You say that, but I don't. Dude, there's nothing scary. I see what your point is. I see your point is like someone just wants to have sex, they're not going to kill you. Right.

You're right. You're right. You're right. Murder's worse than rape. Yeah, you're right. Absolutely. If your loved ones got raped, you'd feel horrible. If they got murdered, you'd feel worse. You're right. It's true. But I don't know. It's terrible. Either way. You get murdered, you're out. You're done. You get raped. It's terrible, but you still can have loved ones and still have good experiences.

And yeah, you're going to have bad memories. Yeah, but it's not about us. It's not about us and like, oh, you know, our wife was murdered or our wife was raped. It's about like the victim of the crime. And like with rape, you have to live with that shit forever. I mean, that is such a violent fucking act that, you know, people use that. You saying that rape is worse than murder is so fucking crazy.

Because rape is horrible for the person that gets raped. Murder is horrible for the person who dies and everyone who loves them too who will never see them again because they don't exist because someone stopped their fucking life. That's worse. They're both terrible,

but to say that one, rape is worse because you remember it, is crazy. Because there's therapy, but to say that one rape is worse because you remember it is crazy because there's therapy People get on ecstasy they do MDMA and have these Post-traumatic stress disorder clinics where they work with people with psychedelic drugs and help them recover from things by having spiritual experiences That you can recover from rape. It's a terrible terrible thing I am not condoning it or endorsing it in any way, shape, or form, but I think murder's worse. And Brian almost got murdered. Not every 16-year-old

who is raped has access to psychedelic drugs. Yeah, right. You're right. Look, I'm not saying that rape is good. It's terrible. It's a terrible thing. But murder's worse, man. And you could joke about murder all day. You could joke about murdering people all day and no one in the audience who's lost a friend to murder should be allowed to step in and go, I've lost a friend to murder.

Stop it with your murder jokes. Right. Yeah, but I don't know if you would, like, again, like, lash out and attack that person as much. Like, if that person was fucking. You would if they heckled. You would if you were telling a joke about murder. Someone said, talk about murder. And you go, nothing's funny about murder.

You know, oh, what's funny about murder? The bullet killing someone? An arrow? A machete? And someone goes, actually, murder's never funny. Right. And you go, wouldn't it be funny if somebody just murdered him? But again, man.

Where would you stand on that? There's not this fucking history. Where would you stand on that? Where would you stand on that? If somebody wrote a blog, and the blog was written by a fat man. I certainly. A dumb man that you don't want his love, and he believes in the Confederate flag. And what if he wrote a blog about that? Would stand up for him because it's the same fucking issue

it is the same issue it certainly is because murder is getting fucking reported there's not a stigma uh about murder the murderer or the person worse that the family of the family of the person who's murdered doesn't have to defend the fucking victim the victim isn't fucking put on trial sometimes they're obviously well listen man you're you are creating a lot of straw men here this is doesn't have to defend the fucking victim. The victim isn't fucking put on trial. Sometimes they are, obviously. Well, listen, man. You are creating a lot of straw men here. This is not... Murder is worse,

and you're saying that a situation happened, and it was a murder joke, that that would be okay. That's what you're saying. And I say that's crazy. Here's what I'm saying, because I think we're talking in certain ways. No, because we're talking about comedy, man.

We're not talking about reality. That's my point. You know that if someone says, would it be funny if somebody just murdered him, you know that that know that if someone says would it be funny if somebody just murdered him You know that that's worse than saying wouldn't be funny if someone just raped him. That's not worse. It is worse Murder is way worse than right murder is worse than rape man. I don't think we have this conversation You're crazy. You'd rather be murdered than raped. What's that? You would rather be murdered than raped then raped Yes, you would rather be murdered than raped

I would rather if someone is gonna have to live with Yes. You would rather be murdered than raped. I would rather... If someone is going to have to live with rape... You! None of us will have to understand. You're saying murder is worse than rape. None of us understand where these fucking girls are going. I'm not talking about that, man. I'm talking about is murder worse than rape.

I say it is. For me? Yes. Yeah, of course. I would rather get... And for every other fucking human being that's ever lived, murder is worse than rape. We don't fucking know what they're going through we don't and

if I Jamie you're talking nonsense keep bringing up the feeling first fucking going to weird shit and victimization of the show was all about how you know we have to have more empathy for each other but we're screaming about how fucking rape victims just no no no you're coming and not go to a fucking no we're comparing murder to rape that's what we're. We're not doing all these other things you're trying to introduce into the... We're not doing that. We're comparing murder to rape.

And we're saying that murder is worse than rape. You kill people, they cease to exist, they die. If someone has sex with you against your will, it's a horrible, horrible thing that should hurt you. It's going to be a bad thing. But it's not as bad as murder, period. But the reason that it's more stigmatized, the reason that more people... It's not st not as bad as murder, period. But the reason that it's more stigmatized, the reason that more people...

It's not stigmatized more than murder, man. If you found out that a guy raped someone, you go, oh, what an asshole. If you found out a guy murdered someone, that's a different fucking feeling. I see, that's where I disagree. I don't know. I want the guy who murdered people killed immediately, removed from society. I want the guy

who raped someone, I want to find out what the fuck went wrong that he dehumanized people to the point where his sexual needs or power needs or whatever the fuck that supersedes his need to compliment his fellow humans to be a part of humanity and culture. What went wrong with this guy? I want to find out

if he was raped by his parents. We can learn something about that guy. But we can't with murder. I think a lot of times with murder it's just people have access to things, and they have impulses, and they do terrible things. I mean, there's a lot of different reasons for murder. There's a million different reasons for murder. There's only a couple different reasons for rape.

It's not nearly as complicated. There's all sorts of reasons why people want people dead. There's not reasons why people want to rape people. There's only a couple. It's either you want some sex, or you want to control someone and be violent with them. It's not like this fucking bitch looked at my bike funny. I got a raper. You know, people kill people because they wear the wrong clothes. You know, you can wear blue in a red neighborhood and they kill you.

There's a lot more differences why people murder you than rape you. So it's an unfair comparison. But murder is worse. You know, and I yeah, you can't understand what it's like for someone to have been victimized by that crime you also can't understand what it's worse for a mother to lose her son to violence no because that could be just as bad and i or worse and i think like talking these hypotheticals is like yeah but that's what you keep doing you keep bringing up hypothetical justifications and i'm saying that you can't do that man and i'm saying you know that they're both just jokes that a guy joking around about wouldn't be funny if that guy got. That a guy joking around about wouldn't it be funny if that guy got murdered is the same as someone saying

wouldn't it be funny if that guy got raped. He doesn't really mean that. He's making a joke to move a comedy show along. So we're all introducing it. And Liz Winstead, fucking hypocrite bullshit,

to her to say on stage that it's not even a joke, of course it's a joke. I just thought there was... It's a direct joke. There's so... Here's the joke, Ready? Set up. Actually, rape is never

funny. Punchline, wouldn't it be funny if she just got raped by five guys? That's it. That's a joke. To say that that's not a joke is silly. It's not saying we're endorsing rape. It's not saying people should be, you know, allowed to say horrible things to people.

It's you're not dealing with the context of the situation where someone was reacting to someone saying something dumb. I might rape that bathroom in a bit. Are you going to? Yeah. Can I pee first? Sure. Do you have to go?

Do I have to pee? Yeah, well, I was supposed to go like half an hour ago. Listen, man, I didn't want to hold you to the coals like this. No, I mean, we... This is a very controversial subject we legitimately disagree i don't think you are pro-rape i fucking still hope you don't think i'm pro-censorship you are if you think you should have done that then you think that it could not have been funny even though everybody laughed yeah but i mean that's like everybody's sense of humor is fucking subjective.

Like you don't think everything a comedian does is funny. Right, so for those people, that was a great moment. It was funny. So why do you think that didn't happen with when Cook the next week or two weeks later or whatever? Totally different subject. Again, because murder is worse than rape. There you go. I know, man. People got like – no one really defended that.

Nobody defended Cook because it wasn't a good joke. But don't you think that it was – He was joking around about rape and – or excuse me, Nobody defended Cook because it wasn't a good joke. But don't you think that it was... He was joking around about rape, or excuse me, about murder, and it wasn't a good joke, so nobody defended him. That's why everybody defended Tosh. Because murder's worse than rape, you son of a bitch. I think people got mad at... I know I got mad at Dane Cook because the joke was

that the movie was so bad. He was thinking that, what was it? Meanwhile, I heard the movie's awesome. It's fucking incredible. I got more mad at that than the murder thing. Well, I know Dane. Dane is the type of dude who will say things to try to be funny. He's trying to be edgy.

He's trying to crack a good joke. He thought this is a crazy thing to do. Do it a week later. Should I? Fuck it. Let's do it. I mean, he doesn't need it either. And then I'm so late.

But this went well. I don't think anyone should be censored. I don't like hecklers. But me personally. I don't like rape. I don't like rape. I don't like violence either. I don't like murder.

I don't like anything cunty. But that also means when someone who is a non-rapist and non-violent like Daniel Tosh is at a comedy club and he makes a joke about rape. He shouldn't be fucking chastised by these dummies on the air. This nonsense that you're hearing between from Liz Winstead, it's just so silly. It's silly. You shouldn't rate people. Abso-fucking-lutely.

You also should shut your fucking mouth at a comedy club. Can we end on that? If you don't want, if you don't want to get blowback. Can we agree that we're all anti-rape? We're all anti-rape. But I do, but I, unless I pay money for it but i do uh you know i do go back to what you said before where it's just

like i don't know as tedious as it may be or whatever i would much rather i just i don't know i think like me personally like when i write like i do think about i'm like am i going after the right person do you know what i mean and that was an ad-lib thing like I'm taking it out of the Tosh well it's really simple man what you could have really said was right I mean this is what I said when I would say you should think what I think but what I my my point of view was that yeah you know rape isn't funny but that was funny because he didn't rape anybody it's not a rape it's a word words came out of his mouth describing a ridiculous fictional scenario. I mean, would it be worse if he said, wouldn't it be funny if gargoyles came down and ate her asshole and killed her?

Yeah, that would be worse. I'm liking your dolphin piss gargoyle jokes. You're not giving yourself credit. They're very funny. Thank you. Dolphin piss, drowning by dolphin piss is one of the worst ways to go. That is true. Unicorn piss is even worse.

That's worse than rape, the Unicorn Piss one. Look, what I'm saying is that this is comedy and it's not real. Sure. And what a guy's doing when he's doing what Tosh did

is asking the audience, he's coming up with new material and he's fucking around. Right, but what I'm saying is like, we all have comics we don't like. Me and you agree on it. You don't like Tosh?

The joke was funny. I actually don't know much of his stuff. He's a good dude. Let me tell you something. I heard he's a good comic. He's a good dude. He's always friendly. Every time I've met him, he's been real friendly to me. I only talked to Tosh? The joke was funny. I actually don't know much of his stuff. He's a good dude. Let me tell you something. I heard he's a good comic. He's a good dude. He's always friendly.

Every time I met him, he's been real friendly to me. I only talked to Tosh a few times. I did his show once. Hey, Brian, have you? We did a thing with Manny Pacquiao, who's also a great guy. Manny Pacquiao is one of the nicest guys of all time. You meet him, you would never believe he's a stone-cold killer. He's so friendly and generous and nice to people.

He's a tiny dude, too, right? Very small guy, yeah. And Daniel Tosh is very tall, too. But Daniel Tosh is? Very small guy, yeah. And Daniel Tosh is very tall too. But Daniel Tosh is a really nice guy, man. And he's not a hurtful person. He's just trying to make some people laugh and do his gig. And he does it really well. And, you know, and what this and to hear this from like these silly people

like Liz Winstead saying, first of all, it wasn't a joke. I'm glad I told that story about open mic days. Because I never told that story before. And maybe she doesn't remember it. Maybe she'll say it's not true it's fucking true I remember that shit because I remember

I had this girlfriend that I was dating at the time her name was Stephanie and she was older than me one of the first times I ever dated a chick who used to tell me

what to do but she liked to fuck so it was fun she was cool she was a nice person but she was older than me and used to like tell me what to do

and then after I got off stage I walked off the stage and she said you can't do that she said if you want to be a comedian you have to be a comedian you can't just quit in the middle of doing comedy i was like damn bitch you feisty she's telling me what to do but i'll never forget that man because i remember thinking i don't want to deal with these kind of people i mean it's nonsense if someone would actually fucking do that i don't brian coin that was the guy's name i don't want to do a censorship either and it's like i mean

the thing is it's like but that is censorship you have debated before, and it's not. It's not. You're telling me that I can't have... You're saying he shouldn't have said something like that. No, I'm saying I would have. So he should have said something like that? Well, that was... By saying, dude, by saying that it contributes to rape culture, though,

you are saying it should be censored. I found that shitty, just like you found my opinion shitty. I didn't find your opinion shitty. I found your opinion to be a little self-involved, and I felt like there's a certain thing that some people do when they get on Twitter where they say things

because they know that they're going to get a bunch of people agreeing with them, and they're not necessarily making sense. Really? Because that fucking worked out for me. You think that was my goal? Lefties? You're people for sure, dude. Not the people I fucking see on a daily basis. I see comics on a daily basis. You write things, fellow liberals.

You write things on Twitter, fellow liberals. I know who you're communicating with. You're communicating with people who already love you. That's what you're, when you're saying things that you want people who already love you and you know how they feel about things like that. When you start saying shit like it's supporting rape culture, you know who you're talking to. I'm shitty at business, but if you thought that i thought this was going to work out this was going to be a lot of fucking fun to deal with on shows podcast like i i know who follows me on

twitter but i know who's more vocal i knew that i was going to get shit for this i wasn't like ecstatic about it but that doesn't mean that the only reason i'm not going to defend something i believe in is because i don't want to piss off my friends. That's not what I'm saying. I didn't say that at all. What I said was it seemed like you were preaching to the choir in a way that you thought they wanted you to hear. I never thought that was going to happen. Dude, thousands of people –

You just were ready for a fight, and you said, like, I have to stand my ground. It was how I fucking felt, just like everybody will tweet their fucking opinions on how they feel, just like you'll tweet your opinions on the want drugs, on the military-indust industrial complex, whatever. It's you tweeting your opinions. That was me tweeting my opinions. This opinion you disagreed with, same shit. It's not

just an opinion. It's a stance. Me and your job, the reason people follow us is to hear our opinions on things. If we didn't want people to know that stuff, neither of us would be on Twitter. Neither of us would be fucking comedians, right?

You just happen to disagree with this one. That's it. Well, it's not just that I disagree with it. It's that every single comedian that I've talked to about it disagrees with it. Sure. He disagrees with it vehemently and believes that you have done something.

So clearly I did not take the popular stance. It's not just that you didn't take the popular stance. You didn't take the stance that comes from the people that do the job and know how difficult it is to do an ad-lib scenario like what Tosh was doing. And to have someone non-ironically shout out, actually, rape is never funny, while he was talking about how rape isn't funny. But again, now we're getting back to defending the heckler. I'm not defending the fucking heckler.

But you are. I don't know. By saying that now we're getting back to defending the heckler. I'm not defending the fucking heckler. But you are. I don't know. By saying that what he's done is bad, you're saying that what she did was not as bad. And what he did only existed because she did something. Right. Holla. But again,

when the dude threatened me, that didn't become a big thing. What dude threatened you? On Twitter. Who threatened you? No, the war guy. You know what I mean? With that heckler. You know what I mean? He didn't become a big thing on Twitter. Who threatened you? No, no, no, the war guy. You know what I mean? With that heckler. You know what I mean? Like, that didn't become a, like, fuck that guy. The guy who said if I kept talking, he was going to beat the shit out of me.

At Cap City. Oh. Where it's like. Yeah, that's in Austin. You can't fuck around in Austin, son. Like, that sucks. You know what I mean? Well, that's definitely.

Again, I had to deal with a worse version of a heckler. Yeah, that's worse than what you did. But it's still not. It's still stupid. But, I mean, we're going to disagree a worse version of a heckler. Yeah, that's worse than what you did. But it's still not... It's still stupid. But I mean, we're going to disagree on this forever. Listen, man, I think ultimately, though, we agree that it's about being a good person. And what you think is that talking and joking around

about violent acts is not a part of being a good person. About the victim of it. I see your point. Not the word, not the fucking culture, not the rape scenarios or whatever, a part of being a good person about the victim of it i and i i i see your point i totally see your point culture not the rape scenarios or whatever about like specifically like the punch line is the person who's raped i think that's fucking lazy i think it's lazy comedy just like racial stereotypes i think it's fucking lazy i think people can be funnier and more creative than that yes i totally see that i don't really think it's lazy i think it was the perfect thing

to say in that scenario. If it's been reported exactly the way I described, that's really what happened. He's just joking. Everyone pretending that this is some sort of a real national debate. The reality is, we should be nice to each other, for sure.

But the also reality is, you shouldn't yell out stupid shit at a comedy club. And here's another reality. There's a lot of dumb people that don't know they're dumb. And that's part of being dumb. And you have this fucking wild ass stupid opinion. And you think the whole world should hear. And you want to stand up and yell it. I mean I had it a couple weeks ago in Calgary.

Some dumb guy just stood up and started yelling something in the middle of the show. And we often wait while he gets kicked out. And he's like yelling and laughing. And then he got kicked out. And everyone's booing at him. It's a part of life. You're going to have to deal with that sort of a thing. But when you're a stand-up comic, you know what the fuck he's doing.

You know what he's going through. He's not supporting rape. And he's certainly not supporting rape culture, which supports rape. He's not. He's telling a joke. He's doing a joke. Just as if he would be doing a joke about murdering somebody. I just think you've got to pick a team, son.

We're on team stand-up. All right? God damn it. Listen, this Friday, we've got a killer show here at the Ice House, ladies and gentlemen. It's getting deeper as we speak. Greg Fitzsimmons, Joey Diaz, Dom Irera, Brian Redband, and me. That's of now. And Brian and I are going to talk after the show and maybe add some more motherfuckers. I have a secret. Yeah, what's the secret? It's somebody that will be really good if he if he tells me yes he's going to tell me yes or no and it's uh Jeffrey Ross maybe oh Jeff Ross would be awesome his new show starts tonight don't sit in the front row if

it's Jeff Ross yeah um yeah just a new roasting show on Comedy Central tonight burn all right so thank you Jamie and listen man you know I love you and uh even though we disagree I think you're a great guy and I just want you know we love you. And even though we disagree, I think you're a great guy. And I just want, you know, we can all have our differences of opinions on things. And, you know, I know I got a little aggressive with you here and held you to the fire. But in no way is it that I disrespect you or don't like you or like hanging out with you or talking to you. Word. It's a tricky situation, and it's a very passionate one to me.

And, of course, rape is terrible, folks. Any cunty behavior is terrible. You guys don't rape anybody. What Liz Winstead did when I was an open mic-er was fucking terrible. Brian Coyne, I got your back, son. 20 plus years later. Holla at your boy if you're still alive. Wow, that got dark.

Folks, tomorrow night, or tomorrow day, Andrew motherfucking Dice Clay. Thursday, Everlast. Hell yeah. Shit's getting crazy here at the Ice House. And, of course, Friday night we will have the Ice House Chronicles, which, just listen to the lineup we just said. Greg Fitzsimmons, Dom Irera, Joey Diaz, Brian Redband.

Tony Hinchcliffe. Tony Hinchcliffe, who's hilarious. A hilarious young comic who does a lot of the hosting that we have at the Ice House. And he's fucking great, man. I watched him again last week. He's great at working the crowd. He's great at ad-libbing. Thanks to Onnit.com for supporting our show.

Thanks to Alienware for hooking us up with some sweet products. This laptop is the shit. And if you're into gaming, it's perfect for you. Follow Alienware MMA on Twitter. Follow RedBan on Twitter. Follow Jamie Kilstein on Twitter and be nice. Come on, folks. We can agree to disagree.

Be nice. There's so much rape in my timeline. I'm sure. Don't rape this timeline. There's more than one in six rape threats in my timeline. Come on, folks. You don't have to rape Jamie's timeline. 79 mentions. I'm going to rape you at the Olive timeline. Come on, folks. You don't have to rape Jamie's timeline. 79 mentions. I'm going to rape you at the Olive Garden. Seven times, Brian?

Seven times. You're doing it seven times? You're fucked? Seven times. It's like the same people over and over again. Look, folks. Love and happiness is the only key to life. If you want to be a happy person, you've got to do a couple things.

One, you've got to get your own shit together so that nice people would want to be around you. Okay? Because if you don't have your own shit together, you're not going to attract nice people. It's just a fact. Nice people don't want to deal with your bullshit. And if they do deal with your bullshit, you're making them a victim and they're enabling you. So get it together, you dirty fucking freaks. Thanks to Onnit.com.

Go buy yourself some Alpha Brain to get clear thoughts like these. This podcast is also brought to you by our silent sponsor, marijuana. Marijuana, which is illegal federally, but yet awesome, and available here in California through select loopholes. Go to Onnit.com if you want to get some non-marijuana hemp force protein. It's hemp. It's not marijuana. Even though it's illegal, but you can buy it and bring it in here. It doesn't make any fucking sense.

We're living in a fucking police state run by corporations. Jamie Kilstein, break it down for folks. This is the last words. Say it, Jamie. Corporations and rape are bad. All that shit's bad. Folks, we love you, and we'll see you soon. Thank you for all the positive

support. Thank you, everybody that came out to the show in Denver. It was fucking beyond fantastic. We were on a crazy roll. We're all in this thing together. Hey, look, Joe. You fucking freak. This girl raped me. She threw me on the ground and then she used... She's naked and covered in blood.

She's gonna rape me. I think this is rape culture. Shut it off, quickly. You're supporting girls raping you. Alright, we love you guys and we will see you tomorrow. Thank you, everybody. you