The Joe Rogan Experience - #257 - Immortal Technique, Swavey Krokett, DJ GIJOE

Episode Date: August 28, 2012

Joe sits down with Immortal Technique, Swavey Krokett, and DJ GIJOE.

Check it out. The Joe Rogan Experience. Train by day, Joe Rogan podcast by night, all day. My friend, thank you very much for coming back, man. Thank you for having me back, Joe. I'm fresh off tour. I'm here. I got such a huge response from being on your show last time.

Like a million people hit me up. So you guys need to do it again. Bring your peoples on there. You and Joe need to get blazed up. I had everything, and everybody was saying that, yo, y'all need to smoke an L together. We're at Red Band ad. Joe looks hungry. So we did everything that we could.

And then, of course, y'all see this thing is not a bomb right here. You know what I mean? My grandmother that always hooks up my people over here down in Inglewood said, yo, man, give that nice young man some food. Oh, that's beautiful. Isn't that like the most warm and loving gesture? Thank you, sir. You got the steak right there. You know what I mean?

That is such a family gesture when somebody offers you some food. That's beautiful. If y'all out there in the world, you're welcome, my brother. If y'all out there want to know what it is called, Lomo Saltado. Very delicious food. Go get you some. We out of here. And in vegans, go fuck yourself.

Jesus Christ. You're missing out, bitch. Everything dies, including lettuce. I had a song about that called Beef and Broccoli. Yeah, that's right. People always ask me, why did you write that? Like, were you angry at somebody? I said, no, you know what it was?

I was just in the middle of eating so many like hamburgers or something and someone would be in my ear like, hey, you know, you shouldn't be doing that right now. I'm like, you mean as it's going through my throat and going into my stomach, you're telling me how much it's killing me? But later on, like I understood because somebody approached me seriously about it and was like, look, you know, it's not that you can't have me just find some balance, brother. And then, you know, there are certain body types that are more susceptible to heart disease, diabetes, get yourself diagnosed. Somebody actually took the time to explain it to me. And at that point, I guess I had a less, you know, aggressive

counter reaction to it. It was more like, all right, I'll listen to you if you're really kicking knowledge to me and telling me how I can live to be 90 instead of 65. But I guess them harassing the fuck out of me for a minute was like, you know, get out of here, man. I don't want to hear it. They're missing a great pleasure in life. Some delicious meat is a great pleasure in life. I mean, cows are going to die whether you eat them or not.

The whole thing is so ridiculous. You know what I love, man? I love the passion behind it and where it's dedicated to. It's dedicated to stopping suffering. And they're worried about the suffering of these animals. And I totally understand that. And I'm totally against factory farming. When you see those disheartening videos of animals being stuffed

in these little tiny cages. Me and my ex one time, we ordered wings and a pizza a while ago and we were watching something called MeatVideo.com where it's about all the factory farming. Where the little chicks come in and they separated the chicks at birth.

So all the females went in one direction and all the dudes went in on another conveyor belt towards like a gigantic hole in which they were all mashed up in. And they used like the gook to make the little cookie cutter thing for the nuggets. Right? Because they're like soft bone and soft flesh. And it was eye opening. They showed like pigs having their skin boiled off. Mind you, all

before we were about to eat wings and all this other stuff. So finally she was like, no, no, I just want some pizza. She called me like, I can't do this. This is disgusting. There's a kosher way to do it when they kill cows, which is really crazy. You have to slice their throat.

You have to have a really sharp knife and slice their throat. But it's way better to do it with the piston through the brain. The piston through the brain ends the nonsense immediately. The slice through the throat, that's a fucking horrifying bleed out, man. Then they flip it upside down. Yeah. Flip them upside down. That's fucked up.

That, to me, seems like you're getting crazy. Like, why does it matter how you kill this fucking thing? You're killing it. This is the new smart way. You're telling me God wants you to use a knife, you dummy? That's crazy. God wants you to cut his neck. Just get rid of the thing. Put a piston...

People had to invent a knife. You know what I'm saying? We had to invent a knife to kill things. Why can't we invent something that kills them better? No, no, no. God doesn't allow this. No, you silly bitch. Well, I mean, I think, you know what? I think people have a serious disbalance about how they choose to ingest stuff. You know what I mean?

I think there are people that don't eat any vegetables when they should. I have some friends that order, they'll order fries and then a side order of fries. We're not going to shout them out right now, but we love you, homie. But you ordered fries at a side of fries with your meal, with your burger. A bacon mayonnaise sandwich. A bacon mayonnaise sandwich. No vegetables. No vegetables.

BLT, hold the lettuce and the tomato. What the fuck are you doing, man? No vitamins, not at all. No, but that's what I'm saying. There are certain people that need to find a vegetable produce section. You know what I mean? And it's going to change your life. Honestly, real shit.

You're eating fruits and vegetables. Your skin going to get better. You know what I mean? Your whole thing is going to... I know people that they don't know what that is. They think that fruits and vegetables, that's like the tropical Skittles. You know what I mean? Yeah, now I'm getting my vitamin C for the day.

Like, no, nigga. Are you kidding me? Yeah, you should be eating vegetables all fucking day. That's normal. That's what a human's designed for. My girl told me the more colorful the plate is, the better it is for you. It's true, yeah. Beets and spinach and deep leafy vegetables.

Yeah, the real dark ones, like that iceberg lettuce shit, that really doesn't do much for you. That's like mostly fiber, water. But you get like green spinach and kale. That's just so goddamn good for your body. We need that shit. But we also need meat. If steak tastes so good, and there's a reason why it tastes so good, something's got to die to taste that good.

It's like there's a price that has to be paid. This shit is too fucking good. There has to be an opposite to it. You know what I'm saying? Like the push becomes a pull. That horrific act of killing an animal. What seems crazy to us is just... That's why there's a food chain. Yeah, it is.

What seems crazy to us is also you know what I mean? Completely normal to other people. What's normal to us is abnormal to elsewhere. And there are places, and not to say that, you know, not to criticize somebody's culture, but for example, I could never go to a country and order like a dog off a menu. You know what I mean? Like you can go to some place and be like, yeah, I want this little nigga right here. Like, I know too much.

That's crazy. I know too much. You know what I mean? You go to some place, and it's normal, perfect. And for us, we're thinking, this is horrific. But again, it's just another animal that they've chose to somehow incorporate into their society in another way. Imagine if aliens came off a plane and there was something that kind of looked like a person.

It's like, nah, nah, nah. That shit ain't one of us. We just keeping them for food. Rob Markman We would be mind fucked like, God damn. Like a chicken landing here on earth being like yo we're from the oh this is what you do to people that look like us. Yeah.

Intelligent chicken from space. Damn. How high are we? How high are we? How high are we? Thanks Joe. Thanks a lot Joe. Everybody introduce yourself. Starting to my right. I a lot, Joe. Hey, everybody, introduce yourself. Starting to my right.

I'm Sway 7. What up? I'm Sway 7. You know what I mean? I'm from Harlem. I'm a battle rapper. And I'm just an all-around good guy. I love the way you describe yourself, man. You, sir?

And I love to smoke. Weed, weed. Connoisseurs. This is the place for that. Yeah, me dj gi joe um yeah that's me i'm how did you get that nobody had the wild man yeah you would have nobody had that the wildest man in a bunch um i don't know if anybody had the name if they did it doesn't exist for them anymore because i own it now oh that's that try to be me you can't How disappointed were you In the last movie then? Oh well

Well Well Hey you know Not as disappointed As being the one That's coming up right now Oh you mean the one That was pushed back a year?

Yeah Pushed it back a year Maybe one day I'll be in one of their movies But until then I'm still a DJ G.I. Joe I've never seen a G.I. Joe movie But I saw that

Born Legacy movie last night That's a bad fucking movie Really? That, but I saw that Bourne Legacy movie last night. That's a bad fucking movie. Really? That's actually good? No, no, no. It's a fucking movie. It was a good movie. Bourne Legacy.

I heard about it last night. Yeah. I heard about it last night. This dude, I buy him. Jeremy Renner. I buy him way more than Matt Damon. I have a problem with Matt Damon kicking everyone's ass. Yeah, I did too.

I have a problem with him. You know what, though? Because he looks soft, yo. He's a good guy. Y'all over here talking smack all day. Let's do it. Let's do it. Let's do it.

You can look at somebody and you can see the eyes of the window to the soul. You can look at certain people and be like, yo, he's soft. Matt Damon is soft. I don't know if he's soft. Where's he from? Where's he from? I don't know. Boston.

I think he's from Boston. That explains a lot. I buy the other dude. Yeah. I buy this Jeremy Renner dude. He looked like he'd been through a lot, but the problem I had was the story and the genetic mutation and everything. Oh, it's a lot of horse shit. I mean, the script was horse shit, but the fight scenes and all the excitement was cool. I thought it was like one of the best action movies I've ever seen.

The action was good, but it was just like the storyline was so garbage that you just didn't even... Really? See, apparently the books are amazing. And apparently the book is like super complicated, which is why...

This was a pretty complicated movie. You know? It's not like... You have to follow a lot of shit and pay attention. There's a lot of things going on. It's common with movies, though, isn't it? Yeah.

They're trying to squeeze in 400 pages in 90 minutes. In this respect, I'll give you that. It was a different approach than the typical Hollywood rubber stamp, whatever we're going to do. Even though some of those are successful. They built up, for example, Avengers is not a movie that's successful just on its own. It's successful because there was a series of characters that were already built into it that then instead of just having their own movie, they had a mega movie. You know what I mean? This is something that's at the end of a trailing group of movies that the main character and

several other people just didn't want to do anymore. And the other actors are like, hey, fucker, we need the money. Like, what are you doing? You're trying to cut this whole shit to the ground. And he's like, nah. You know what's bothering me about it now that I'm thinking about it? What's bothering me about it is he didn't get any pussy in this movie, nor did he look for it. The dude is a superman.

He keeps saving this super hot chick over and over and over again. He's saving this bitch on motorcycles. He's holding on to her, throwing her over his shoulder. They're going over ledges. He's like a chimpanzee and shit. And he's never trying to get some pussy from her. Superhuman strength. That's the chromosome that they forgot to suppress.

They suppressed it. It's literally like Twilight. It's a vampire that won't kill you. It's like it's a Superman. It won't fuck you. It's the same thing. The pussification of this country is now complete. Even our superheroes don't get pussy.

The best way to be a superhero is to just be a martyr. You go out there. You get shot at. You fucking ride a motorcycle into a crowd. You crash into a car. But no pussy. Oh, no. And at the end, you save her.

That's when you know it's not real life. And then the happy ending is off. And the superhero never fucks someone else's girl Which we know would definitely happen in real life The superhero would have fucked everybody's wifey Someone else's girl would be pregnant With the superhero's bastard child That you would be able to tell Because it would have superpowers

But your dad would be a regular nigga And it's like yo what the fuck Some superheroes get some pussy though They must Spider-Man get pussy He was a little sensitive nigga regular nigga and it's like, yo, what the fuck? I'm saying, some superheroes get some pussy, though. They must. In the cartoon. Spider-Man get pussy. In the cartoon. He had that couple girlfriends.

He was a little sensitive nigga, but he had a couple girlfriends. He had a couple girlfriends. Yeah, he did, man. He had Mary Jane. He had a supermodel, Mary Jane. Yeah, Mary Jane, but the new one, he's got a different girl. It's kind of weird. They can start it all over again.

If you went to comic books, you know the original Spider-Man story. He had a girl named Gwen Stacy before he ever met Matt McKay. Right, that's true. So they took it from the Gwen Stacy point of view, but they go back to show.

We're talking to the comic book connoisseur, by the way, Swayve Seven. Oh, man. I am, but I'm more of a Spider-Man connoisseur. Like, Spider-Man's my G. That's my G.

Word to mother. Like, I grew up, my first words were Spidey. No mama, no dada. It was Spidey. Yeah, there was dudes that I couldn't get behind. I could never get behind Thor. You know, it's like, I loved the movie.

I thought the movie was badass. But the comic books were like, come on, man. Thor, you know why I got into Thor? Because there was other stories about Thor that wasn't just comic books. Like, he was the god of the Norse, the son of Odin. And, you know, that's like a real, like comic books. He was the god of the north, the son of Odin. That's like a real... People actually believe in the god of the north. Once upon a time, yeah.

Isn't it funny that that's just out of style? Even though that was the god and the religion of the time, you had to believe in that if you were them. Now it's like, that was silly. We were being silly. We were being crazy.

They used to treat new york like it was another city and then the big city maybe a hundred years ago was paris france you know what i mean before that london you know yep anytime they'll look back and say yeah remember when new york was popping like that before now we're in hong kong and is and this is the shit and people want to be here. Right. I wonder if they could figure that out now though. If they could stop that from happening.

Because they've done a lot to like clean up New York from a crime point of view. Like there's statistics about like violent crime in New York. That shit dropped significantly. Yeah, minus the gunshots

in front of you. Minus the cops shooting you. You know what I mean? Yeah, if you don't know about that. It's a complete fucking police state now which is the difference.

And I think some people like the safety factor, but at the same time, there's also... It's annoying, you know, you got the old stop and frisk shit. Police presence factor, you stop and frisk for looking like you might be a criminal, and we all know who, of course, fits that description. I mean, this personally

happened to me before, where I'm going down the street with a coat. I cross the street. I'm literally jumped. Like, two cops, without saying who they were, jumped out and pushed me towards it. I turn around, and there's a gun on me, and dude's like, all right, you know, stay still.

Don't move. Like, right now, patting me up and down, like, yo, do you have a weapon on you right now? I'm like, nah, nah, nah. I'm sitting here. I'm like, yo, what the fuck is these niggas are trigger happy one of them was young so i'm thinking in my mind all right this nigga's a nut job he just probably just got his badge you know his mom let him out the house you know once in a while you got to tell them what it is and take their badge number but realistically speaking even if you file a claim they make it so difficult for

you to do anything and when they're like all well, you don't got nothing on you, you know what I mean? They'll come by the block. And then we were sitting there, you know, one day chilling. They're like, yo, time's up, you know what I mean? Let's wrap it up for the night, fellas. Yeah, let's wrap it up for the night. I'm a grown man.

I'm a grown man, dude. I ain't got no curfew, fam. You ain't going to tell me where. First of all, I live here. But two, we chilling. Ain't nobody doing nothing. Yeah, if you're sitting on going to tell me where. First of all, I live here. But two, we chilling. Ain't nobody doing nothing. Yeah, if you're sitting on your front porch, you can't just sit on your front porch. Is there a law for that?

I'm talking about let's wrap it up, fam. I'm a grown-ass man, fam. Hell no. I ain't going nowhere. Joe, I just said on yesterday's podcast that happened to me in Ohio where I was just eating a McGriddle in a parking lot outside of McDonald's. And these two cop cars just pulled up on both sides of me. And they're like, what are you doing in your car?

And I'm like, I'm just eating a McGriddle. They wanted to see my license and all this shit and I was just parking, eating right outside of McDonald's. What are you doing in your car? That's the stupidest question. And then the best thing is he's like, alright, I'm going to let you go. And I'm like, let me go for what? I'm eating McGriddles?

You know, it was like, it reminds me of the first days when we were down at Occupy and people were telling the cops, you can't do this, you can't do that. And they were almost explaining to the cops what their job was. And it felt like, and I say this a lot, but it's really the way I feel and the way a lot of people feel. It feels like they're angry at you because you know your rights and because you know what it means to be an American. you know your rights and because you know what it means to be an American. And I'm going to keep repeating that because everybody who's listening out here should know their rights and the ability that they have to say, no, you know what, homie? Go get your fucking search warrant.

Go take six hours because I guarantee you when you come back here and there's nothing in here, they're going to look at you funny. You're going to want to find a fucking any nugget of weed or a hint of a dollar bill that smells like weed. And it's not going to make your case because you know I'm going to jump in court and you're the one that's going to get fucked over at the station. You have to learn how to defend your rights and also know when to not argue with an angry cop in a dark alley when there's no one else around and you potentially get your ass kicked

a shot. You know what I mean? They need to know now when to argue with us. Did you guys see that story on CNN from a couple days ago where they're investigating this sheriff in Florida that they think killed a couple people and just pulled them over and for whatever reason decided to get rid of them and people disappeared. And his story doesn't match up with his phone logs or with video in front of the store where he said he dropped the people off. There's no video of him actually dropping the guy off. So it's like an ex-sheriff type serial killer. And they were talking about it on CNN.

He is a serial killer. They know that he's, they believe that this guy's killed at least two people. And one of them was this Mexican immigrant and the dude couldn't speak English. And him and his brother, they separated him and his brother and he just fucking never saw his brother again.

And his story was the same as with the other dude that he dropped him off at the Circle K. So it's very likely that this cop is a fucking serial killer and he's a cop. And so they fired him like eight years ago or whatever it was but they're still going after him. I think it's four years ago. They're still going after this guy

and trying to pin a case on him. To find out where the bodies are? Trying to pin any sort of a case on him. They know that he lied. They know that he lied about what he did. Like, he said that he found an abandoned car, but it turns out that he actually had called in a search on the guy's name. Like, he was so fucking stupid, he didn't realize that once you call in a search on a guy,

that there's a record of that. So you can't just say, I didn't do that. Like, he was an idiot serial killer. So they know he lied about that. He didn't, you know, so he has two separate stories and there's a person missing. The guy needs to be, they need to start pulling his fucking toenails out.

No, I mean, you got all this type of stuff. You got the guy, Chavis Carter, I think is his name. The kid down south who he was in the back of a cop car handcuffed behind us, and they say, oh, he must have shot himself in the head. Yeah.

Like, at what point is there no system to regulate the police officer? I mean, I think that it's great. Look, like I said before, if your child is kidnapped, you're not going to call your homies. You're going to call someone that has a nationwide network of someone. But at the same time, Jesus Christ, you know, have some kind of oversight committee someplace to keep them in check because obviously they're not good at doing that themselves. There's no checks and balances. You're telling me

you didn't find a gun that he had on him? For real? And he's handcuffed behind his back and then he finds this gun that you didn't know he had and then he shoots himself in the temple. It don't even make sense. That is like, you can't even Cirque du Soleil that, can you?

How did that ever get proved in court? Who the fuck could do that? Think about shooting yourself in the temple from here. They ran with that story? Yeah. Not only did they run with that story, that's it.

You ain't shooting nothing with your handcuffs on. What the fuck, man. From behind your back. And who didn't search him before he got in the car? And you know, when they put your handcuffs on behind your back even, they seatbelt you in to make sure that you can't get your hands past your legs. Because a guy who's really

agile can, even with a handcuff from behind, you can go under your legs and you can, if you're really agile, you can get your handsuff from behind you can go under your legs and you can if you're really agile you can get your uh your hands free and then you could potentially hit somebody but he didn't do that he was still behind his back right so it's not like he got himself all the way out and then he went like that which makes sense no his shit was behind his back shot himself in the head like really are you sure the killer didn't think that one through. That's what happened.

Oh, that's true. See, there was no way I had that man do that. It seems crazy, right? It seems like the worst episode of CSI ever. Yeah. Right, and then here we are. That happened, what, July? It says now July 28th.

July 28th. We're here now, damn near August 28th. You know what I mean? We're bouncing next month to next month to next month. It'll be out of the news. Yep. And that's how they choose to end things. They'll give the company some settlement. They'll give the family some settlement through one of the people who supports the police department, whatever.

And then they'll get it settled. Yeah, this hurricane will wipe a lot of shit out. People will forget about what happened before because it's going to be a big hurricane. It's going to be a lot of damage. It's like every new thing that comes up occupies our interest and takes us away from crazy shit like that. How is that hurricane popping off? Because I heard there was a slight death toll in the Caribbean, but they said it wasn't as severe as they thought it was going to be. So hopefully that means that by the time it gets up to New Orleans and that entire area, it's dissipated a lot.

Because I don't know if, I mean, they say, and I was watching on the news this morning, they said, oh, we have all these new incredible things that's going to prevent it. But, you know, again, you're fucking with nature, dude. You know what I mean? You don't realize we don't, the earth doesn't belong to us. We belong to the earth. And you think that you can put up a wall and tell water, no, go away. Fuck, man. No. Fuck you. that you can put up a wall and tell water, no, go away. Like, fuck, man. No. Fuck you. I'm going to take this whole shit over. You know, that

city wasn't destroyed by some gigantic meteorite or terrorist. It was destroyed by standing water. That was what happened. Yeah, it's... We have to recognize there's a topography to the world and it changes. And that's why you got to topography to the world, and it changes.

And that's why you got to move. You got to move when it changes. It's unfortunate, but you're fucking up New Orleans, because New Orleans is amazing, man. That's the problem. New Orleans is like, there's something about New Orleans. It's like everything's super old. Yeah, we did. We made money there.

I normally don't gamble, but Slave has a hot hand at the crab table. All right, man. Maybe I do gamble. See, remember I told you my friends would keep me honest? Keep me honest. Listen, listen. I'll prove it to you, Joe. Hey, listen.

When it comes to real shit, I'm very fair with all of my peoples, and I pay everybody on time, and I do it the right way, don't I? You can't lie. I'm a great it the right way, don't I? I'm a great driver, right? You see what I'm saying? They won't lie to me. They won't lie to me. They tell me, real, you're a good businessman. You do your thing. Alright, when you're behind the wheel, chill.

Don't start your road rage. There ain't nobody like my friend Tate Fletcher. Remember when Tate drove that van once? Oh, yeah. No, Browntown Johnny. He's the craziest driver in the world. Ever been in a car with Tate? Yeah Tate Drove that van once Oh yeah No, Browntown Johnny He's the craziest driver Yeah, you're right You ever been in a car with Tate? Yeah, he's way crazier

You're going to hear A lot of hoes Come on, man You're going to hear A lot of hoes Are you a car guy? Do you like cars? Yeah, I've been

Yeah, I love You know what I want to do? I want to fly, too I want to get a pilot's license And do that But I don't know What the process is Don't tell them you're friends with me

You know what I mean? Well, my friend's 18-year-old just did it. Word? Yeah, it's not that hard, man. This kid ain't that bright. I'm just kidding. I couldn't help that. He's actually very bright.

I'm just completely fucking around, if you hear this. I didn't even say his name, but he knows what I'm talking about. He knows I love him. You know I love you, buddy. I've got a pilot's license. Yeah, no, he's a very bright kid, actually. But he said it was pretty straightforward. My friend Phil Hartman, he had his pilot's license, too.

My friend Urge actually flies planes. Urge got a... He don't own a plane, baby. Big shout out to Urge. Yeah, he's a hustler. Neil Armstrong got one before his driver's license. Did he really? Yeah.

Wow. Phil Hartman had a... No wonder he ended up on the fucking moon. Did he really? Yeah. Wow. Phil Hartman had a, yeah. No wonder he ended up on the fucking moon. I'll be smoking some shit that make me feel like I got a hot life.

I told you. You got a Dutch, man. It was good. I told you. This California shit is no joke. Where the Dutch is at, Swag. Shit. The Dutch budget ain't really go up that much this tour.

Yo, let me tell you. Last time, what was it? Last time on the Marta tour, I think between him and my friend Diabolic, $176.13 on Dutchess. Or just the cigars to roll urban. I tell you what, every single place we went, people met us with like, oh, yo, here. We went to Humboldt County and they threw like a record. $176.13. Yeah. Wow. Dutch record. $176.13. Yeah.

Wow. On Dutchess. That's incredible. Fucking addict bastard, you know. I smoke. The problem with those blunts, man, is that you're not really supposed to be smoking the outside of that shit and inhaling it like that cigar skin. Cigars, you're supposed to puff them and let them go, but you're taking big, deep hits with that. So you get crazy fucked up from

nicotine and crazy fucked up from weed at the same time. You're right, but I've been doing this so long now. You feel me? Whatever happens, happens, baby. In England, they like to roll joints with cigarettes in them. I hate that.

They do that with the hash in North Africa and all those places we was at. Yo, but I don't know. I don't like the tobacco. I don't like it at all. Tobacco taste is not. And a lot of it is not even natural tobacco. It's all that fucking processed shit.

They're like blending cools with it. Newport blend. Throw a little Newport and a little fucking Marlboro to make something spice it up I don't want to change the subject but Strawberry Hill

shout out to my boy Nims and all that Nims shout out yo this is hip hop we brought we brought hip hop to the Joe Rogan show

the hood the hood listen to you Joe I don't know if you know but the hood listen to you they hit me up right now I appreciate the fuck out of that tell Joe I said what up. So shout out to my man, Diz.

Shout out to Diabolic, Diz. I think that's a beautiful thing that hip hop put out is shout outs. Because rock and roll dudes didn't give no shout outs to each other. The Rolling Stones never liked to give a shout out to Led Zeppelin. You're the shit as well. Yo, shout out to Jimi Hendrix. Ass Face 7. Shout outs are beautiful, man.

Rock and roll rivalries also are a little bit more under the table, whereas hip hop rivalries are very, very public. You give the shout outs. Rock and roll, I could not like you for 20 years, and I would never fucking know that these niggas never got along. I was never backstage in a trailer. I don't know who fucked who's groupie in Des Moines, Iowa back in the day. You know what I mean?

Or some fucked up shit happened, or who took someone's girl and wiped her up. Who knows? It's usually over a... Yeah, almost always. It's usually over a woman when people do... Especially on that high-ass level. Or money.

Or a coat. Or money. Well, a lot of it is ego, too. There's a lot of dudes who want to be the fucking man. Exactly. They can't accept the idea

that there is no fucking man. There's no one the man. You can't be the man. Even the man is not the man. He won't be the man. Even the man is not the man. He won't be the man in some... We need each other. We all need each other. There's this idea that there's going to be one bad motherfucker that every other artist

is just looking down at. Come on, man. Stop it. Just don't be a cunt. We did it again. Damn. That's my... I got criticized the last time because I bring that shit up so much.

You had female activists hitting you up? Oh, that happens all the time. It doesn't have anything to do. There's more men cunts than there are women. I believe that. Because at least women have like. I love that word. If a woman is like, you know, if she has like an attitude, like if she's like aggressive,

it's probably because people have been like fucking with her her whole life. You know, I would hate to be a chick Just constantly everywhere you go dudes try to fuck you It makes more sense to me when a woman's cunty Like I get it Like she's got a defense mechanism Or because she's in a position Where people don't think she deserves to be there

Because she's a woman And she's done work her whole life hard to be there And you come in the door acting like a dick And she's like yo who the fuck are you dude i like a dick i got you come through the door acting country to her she's she's you know paid 30 years of dudes and you're being a cunt the moment you walk in the door there's a difference between that and you walk in the room and there's a 35 year old dude who looks like a football player and he's being a cunt that's a real cunt you're like really man nobody's fucking with you why why are you gonna get aggressive and douchey about this like what the fuck is going on what

kind of psychological rebuff operation you're doing on your brain right here so i'm trying to have a conversation with you and you're trying to blow your chest up. Like, stop it. So speaking of people that are accused of being a cunt, what about champions? Can a champion be a cunt? Oh, you're talking about? Yeah. Yo, because I read so many articles and people were ripping dude apart. And I just like his style. For what we're talking about, we're talking about Jon Jones.

Jon Jones. And you could introduce the little controversy. Did I miss something? Well, this is John Jones was supposed to fight Dan Henderson next weekend for the light heavyweight title. Dan Henderson, you know, strike force champion. He held two different belts in pride at the same time. He's a legend. I mean, Dan Henderson is a fucking all-time legend.

But he got injured. And Chael Sonnen stepped in to take his place and john jones turned the fight down with eight days notice and his camp said they didn't have enough time to prepare for chael sunnen and a lot of people felt like you know chael didn't even have a full camp and john jones was preparing to fight against a legend so he was going to be in top form and a lot of people felt like man john j Jon Jones should have accepted that fight. It's a good fight for him. And it's a bit diva-esque for him to – but I don't know what his psychological process is. Training for one person is a lot different. When you train for a certain person, a certain style, it's a little – I could kind of understand that.

You get your mindset. I could kind of understand it too. Before the training goes. I think he's the best in the world. I think Jon Jones, if it's not him or Anderson Silva, one of those guys are the best in the world. Those are my two favorites. They're the best in the world.

And I think that he – I don't think anybody fucks with him. I just – I don't think that's a tough fight for him. I think that Chael Sonnen could do a lot of shit to make it difficult. Chael Sonnen might be able to take him down for the first time, but I bet Jon is pretty fucking good off of his back. I think he sold himself short by not taking the fight. But that's just me. I have no responsibility for anything.

You know, his decisions, he's a grown fucking man and a world champion. If he doesn't want to fight like that. But I read an article where it says as soon as a person becomes the champion, then the businessman in them starts taking over. And it's like thatollo creed uh you know what i mean type of mindset where you remember where rocky's beating the meetup and he's like oh yeah yeah i mean business too but he's over here closing deals working out merchandisers vendors for the venue you know what i mean i think at some point every champion goes through that kind of uh i, I'm now the champion. This is my, this is, it's not, I'm not a fighter. That's not my profession anymore.

I'm now the champion, which comes with a whole lot of other responsibilities, the politics of it, the endorsements, which people are afraid of losing. So if he can extend that a little bit longer and says, all right, well, no, regardless of what happens, I don't gain nothing by fighting this dude,

except maybe in the eyes of a few diehards that'll be like, you should fight anybody. All right, well, the next guy that comes up, watch, I'll destroy and demolish him, and that'll dissipate all of the shit talk that was happening about you can't fight someone at the last minute or someone else. I mean, he's a fighter. He should be able to fight somebody if they turn a corner and say some shit to him, you know what I mean?

He's all UFC. My nigga, if somebody talks to your girl and tries to grab her ass in the club, you ain't going to have to train for him for eight days. You got to be like eight seconds. I mean, but that's being on point. Exactly. He's on point. This is a fight in setting.

This is a format. Like, this is, you have eight days. Like, normally before a tournament, you look at, it's like basketball. Like, even with the battlegrounds. Watching tapes. You watch tapes of your opponent. You know what I mean? Then you look at it's like like basketball like even with the watching tapes you watch tapes of your opponent you know i mean that you look for weaknesses you look for like a lot of the key to fighting is proper training and knowledge and knowledge of the human anatomy and seeing repeats

and your opponent's movements and stuff and try to count into that shit you know i just look at chael and i look at him and i look at his size advantage, big size advantage. No way he can make 185. Chael makes 185. He's a big kid. He's strong as fuck. He's like heavyweight strong. And I just don't know why he wouldn't have taken that fight.

I think if Chael has more time to prepare, like if Chael has the time to bulk up and to be a legit 205, then that could be a fun fight in the future because Chael Sonnen talks so much shit. Nobody can generate more pay-per-view dollars than that guy. He is the best ever. There's never been a better shit-talking athlete that's ever existed. It's always good to sound like a shit-talker. John Jones, I think, also felt like part of it was that this dude had been taunting him for a couple weeks on Twitter,

saying all kinds of shit that he's a nightmare to him. Jon Jones is like, you just lost to Anderson Silva. You just got stopped in the second round, and I'm crushing everybody, and I'm scared of you just because you say I'm scared of you, and now they say I have to give you a shot. I could see his point of view there, where he was like, fuck this dude. I'm the champion. Suck it.

Yeah, why do I need to fight you? The way Michael Jackson shut down Eddie Murphy back in the day. He did? Yeah. Remember there was the Saturday Night Live thing where he had like a little skit. I always remember he had a Michael Jackson doll, right, when they were making like the Barbie-type Ken dolls, but for the Michael Jackson.

And he pulls down the pants on Saturday Night Live. And he goes, oh, just like I thought, no private parts, right? And everyone laughing and joking. But Michael and them called up the lawyers like, look, homie, let me explain to you how this is going to work. We're going to sue you for all this money, or you're going to get up there, and you're going to apologize, and blah, blah, blah. And he actually pulled Money's card.

I remember that. He pulled Eddie's card out there. Yeah, I do remember that. And let me tell you something. Eddie, he's still king up there, man. I mean, anybody else, they want to take shots at that throne raw and delirious. It's still impossible to outsell them. Like, oh, my God.

But, yo, dude, you ran into somebody that was not playing, somebody that was an entity, a nigga that had his own Neverland and shit. Fairy dust being made for this man. That was a backyard, though. For real, that was a backyard. That was a backyard. dust being made for this nigga. That's a backyard. That's a backyard, yo. That's a backyard. If it really does come out that that dude was diddling kids that whole time, that is one of the scariest

stories ever. I don't even want to know about now. He's dead. It's gone. Yeah, that's sad. I don't want to have that be the last memory I remember him by. Find out the real reason of the glove and everything. No, the glove.

You're a sick fuck right there. You're a sick fuck. You got problems, Brian. That was hard. The glove is because he had vitiligo. Yeah? Yeah, he didn't like eye habit. You see my knuckles?

That's from punching people. From what? No. Yeah, he didn't like eye habit. You see my knuckles? That's from punching people. From what? No. Those areas got wore out.

He didn't like the way it looked on his hands, so he wore a glove. That's what it was. That's his excuse. That's the contestant that didn't quite make it. Those people that had to get choked out at the end of the show. We talked about that. Who was that clown? What was his name?

Jonathan something or another. He was probably somewhere piss What was his name? Jonathan something or another. He was- He's probably somewhere pissing on his girl in the shower or something like that. Oh, dude. They would scream at each other. I never saw- No, no, no. I only grabbed him.

I didn't do anything. He hemmed him up. You hemmed him up? There's YouTube footage of him- You hemmed him up? I just grabbed him. He looked like- No, he looked like-

You know when Bret Hart used to put him in an executioner? Head down, head down. A little scuffle and all that. Hands up in the air. All I did was grab his neck. I just wanted to control him. See how the story is changing? That's all I did.

I just ragdolled him a little bit. When you get a guy in a Muay Thai clinch and you hold the back of his neck and they feel that, they feel that clamp down and they realize, like, I'm in a lot of trouble trouble right now that calms them down and and they don't know what's coming after that yeah exactly i'm in a position like if if i'm not hitting him maybe he won't hit me and then that's what happens they just calm the fuck down just control but he was a dangerous guy the only reason why i did is i was pretty sure he's gonna hit me because his wife had just hit a guy and i said you can't hit i go just because you hit your husband doesn't mean you can hit other people. And then all of a sudden, like, they're in my face.

And it was a heated moment, man. The whole show was, there was a lot of people. There was a lot on the line. They're trying to win money and shit. And they're fucking up. And they couldn't find the flashlight. Where the fuck is the flashlight? They're screaming at each other.

I heard they're doing the show again. It's coming back. Fear Factor? No, we did it. And then it got canceled because we made people drink Donkey Kong. Get the fuck out.

I was just about to say I want to go on this show but never mind. No. Hell no. This swage said hell no. For how much money? How much money

did you use it for? You can only win $50,000. Jesus, $50,000 for a mouthful of Donkey Nut? Are you fucking kidding me? And the sad part is the losers got to live with that shit for the rest of their life. And the other person had to drink donkey piss.

Yes, they had twins is what it was. It was three groups of twins. And these really hot girls drank Donkey Kong. And it was the end of civilization. If I was from an alien race and I was looking down at Earth, I'd be like, that, yeah, we're done. We're done here. Pull it out.

We're going to nuke this bitch from orbit. Imagine God's hand in front of an asteroid and he sees that. Like, oh, fuck this shit. He just gives it the sugar-a-lettered bolo punch and launches that asteroid in our direction. Yeah.

Jesus fucking Christ. What was that conversation like? Well, what's crazy? What was the executive? That executive conversation must have been fucked up. Like, excuse me, Joe. Did you really have a bitch drink Donkey Kong? Two.

Two. Two women and one guy did it. A guy did it? Yep. A guy did it. Mr. Rogan. Lucky. What the fuck?

It's ridiculous. And America said enough. They said, we've had enough. And what happened was it got on TMZ, and TMZ got photos of the jug of Donkey Kong they had to drink. Because it was quite a few ounces, man. It wasn't a small one. Yo, who comes up with this shit? I'll tell you who doesn't.

Me. I'll tell you who showed up at work and said I really don't think they should do this Me There's only twice In the history of the show Where I said you shouldn't do this And there's this and there was another time When they made them ride bulls

Those are two times where I was like this is not good What happened when they rode the bull? Fucking just narrowly avoided everyone dying. Everyone just narrowly avoided getting stomped. They were doing things with fucking bulls balls on that show for as long as I can remember. Yeah. Eyeballs. They always had some weird shit to eat.

But that one takes the cake. I'm done. Dude, we watched Bulls. We got these people on those Bulls. You got the clip right there. Are you fucking serious? Don't play it. I'm not going to play it. Deny its existence.

Because see what happened is TMZ got a hold of it and then TMZ put pictures of everybody who was in outrage. So then NBC said we're going to pull the episode and then they just cancelled the show. They're like fuck this. But before that they were like so psyched. The show was back. The ratings were great.

I see the commercial. I got hyped. What? Listen, man, you can only make people eat animal dicks for so long before that shit becomes like yesterday's news. And then it's like- Another elk penis. You know what I mean?

But this time it's like, no, we have donkey nut for you. It bothered me, but it didn't bother me nearly as much as the riding the bulls one. Because the donkey cum, they could have got there and went, you know what? I don't like my odds here. Take it easy. And they could have opted out, and they were done. That's totally reasonable. It's totally reasonable to quit right there.

And if they did, these two girls would have been – and for whatever reason, the girls had way less of a problem with it. The girls, by the way, preferred the cum over the urine i bet like i don't want to drink that urine i'll take the cum like like yeah yeah i don't know man girls think different than guys but at least no one was going to die the bull thing people could die you know it's it's hard for me because everybody that was on the show was really nice they're nice people they're just trying to have fun and be on a TV show. All of a sudden, I got a glass of cum and I'm pushing it in front of them.

I'm like, this is... So I was happy when it was canceled. I was like, this can't be good karma. This cannot be good karma. There ain't nothing good about this. I'm honest with myself. You're looking at the cum like, damn. Yeah.

I'm pretty honest with myself. When I see no benefit When I see no benefit I see no benefit Did the heat like curdle it? Was there like a top skin layer That they had to bust through? Like one of those natural yogurts Like cold clam

It's like cold clam. Cold yogurts. It's like cold clam chowder. Yeah, like clam chowder. You got to get the top off before you. Disgusting, yo. Like onion soup, French onion soup. This is sickening. Oh, shit.

Shout out to Southpaw. Southpaw. Southpaw hit me up. Southpaw hit me up. Southpaw hit me up. Yo, mad people is out there. I lost my phone in Ventura. I had a wild night. No one hit me up at all.

Oh, my goodness. Do you know if they make wallet chains for phones? I know somebody that's lost their phone three times. That's a good idea. We need to invent that. That's a really good idea, man. Serious. They need to come.

We got to get an iPhone case with a little clip on for a chain. I get so crazy when I party. I don't even know what happens. And the clip on part for the case of the phone will also be a wallet. Like you could put money in there also. Yeah, that's a good idea. That's a really good idea, Brian. I'll patent it.

But you'd have to put it in your back pocket. But the problem is you get jacked. Yeah, you don't want to advertise your phone with how much money you have. Yeah, all of it together, all in a pile. Especially on my block. Don't do that. Especially when you're drunk and you're trying to find your shit. Yeah, that's a no-no.

I lose everything. Yeah, that's just limping in front of the water hole. You lose a lot of stuff, man. I lost a phone in Amsterdam. Yo, keep it real. He lost his phone on the Metro. We went of the waterhole. You lose a lot of stuff, man. I lost a phone in Amsterdam. Yo, keep it real. He lost his phone on the metro. We went to the real Harlem. We from Harlem, but we wanted to go to the real Harlem, the Harlem.

Harlem. We went to Harlem. And we took the train, and he left it on a train. No joke. No joke. He sent the email from the hotel there. The hotel guys sent the main transit. It's like if you sent the email to the MTA who runs a subway in New York. Yo, dude was like, okay, let me

check. And then literally like a day later he was like, yes, someone reported an iPhone that was left here. Rob Markman Wow. Rob Markman Gave him the iPhone. They put it in a package for him and they sent it to America. Rob Markman Holy shit. Rob Markman That would never happen. Rob Markman That's insane.

Rob Markman That's beautiful. Rob Markman And then I lost it because I was smoking some shit out there called Amnesia Hayes. Definitely made me forget where I was, what I had with me. Did they crack down on non-Holland people smoking weed there now? If they did, we didn't know, man. We didn't know nothing about it. Shout out to Walk & Walk. That place was amazing.

That place was amazing. How long ago were you guys there? Maybe earlier this year. Earlier this year. Earlier this year. We did the whole Sweden, Scandinavia run, and then northern part of Europe. I don't know the exact. Was that like April?

April, right? I don't know the exact specifics of the law, but I think they passed some new law that's trying to keep foreigners out of the coffee shops. They're trying to keep. We ain't have no problem. Yeah, I heard that there's ain't have no problem. Yeah. I heard that, that there's no more mushrooms or something like that.

Mushrooms are illegal. People were going over there and jumping off of buildings and shit, tourists. And they were getting in trouble. Bill Hicks had the best joke about that. Man took acid, thought he could fly. He goes,

what a dick. He goes, why didn't he start off on the ground? If he could fucking fly. He's like, he goes, the world just got lighter we lost an asshole such a great bit yo i love i love bill hicks man i really i love the melt there was one youtube clip of him melting down going crazy on a girl who was like you you suck. He was like, you fucking bitch. I want you to go find a fucking soul. He goes off and he goes,

he goes, yeah, you think you can do anything because you have a fucking cunt. I got a cart launch because I got a cunt. Yeah, he goes,

I can yell at performers because I don't have a cunt. And he's just screaming in her face like volume one. And then he realizes, and that was like the meltdown that I guess was salvageable as opposed to the Michael Richards meltdown. It was like a meltdown that you could still.

He made a joke out of at the end. Like, yeah, I hope you're not using this for your next Johnny Carson whatever appearance. And the dude was like. No, you got the interview. He goes, I am aware I'm available for children's parties. Yeah. He sits back and lights a cigarette a lot of people don't yo they say a lot of people don't bit from him yo a lot of people just robbed their entire lot of dudes

did a lot of dudes were influenced by him so much so that the punchline atlanta has a green room in the back comics write shit all over the green room yo joe was here whatever and uh there's a big one that says quit trying to be hicks because like so many dudes who don't even have their own shit together would be going on stage preaching about the republicans and the fucking they're like just like really hicksy stuff yo he yo he had death yo he had death bars for ronald reagan yo he had death bars for Ronald Reagan, yo. He had, it was merciless. The dude, he was like a battle rapper, Swayve. He really had bars, you know what I mean? Speaking of which, my man Swayve, he got a battle coming up. He's going to decapitate some poor, unfortunate individual.

Do you have scheduled battles? Oh, yeah. When is it? September 15th. So this shit has become like a real genre of hip hop. Just battle rap. We need you there to host one of these, Joe. Host one of these crazy ass battles. Yeah, I want to come through and host.

That might be fun, man. It's kind of making a comeback, though. I bet I would. I talk shit about it, but I really love it. But I talk shit about everything. People don't understand. They think, oh, he doesn't like battle rap. Battle rap took on a world of its own.

It's on a whole different stage now. They got battle rap events packing 3,000 people. If you look at the TV, Joe, here's him battle rapping, actually. That's his opponent, some unfortunate individual. Who was that?

I want to hear a little of that. I say, we've established the fact is that New York niggas are sick of sons. Probably because we're a close-knit clique. Shit, every day I talk to a different one. If I get writer's block, I hit the line of Fox for a slicker pun. Not just rhyme shit, but nonsense. I'll hit convent when I ain't getting them.

For shooting tips, truest shit, I hit bricks. He ain't missing none. For that crack, I hit the jack. Luciano, his lyrics dumb. After this, it'll be more to combat how I finish, son. I was like, hold on, hold on, I said, let me paint a giant picture for you. Come on. That's a skip it, right?

He did skip it. Yeah, skip that one. Some dudes are not that good. Take him back a little, take him back a little. Take him back a little. Take him a little back. They see him very beginning. He's scared already. Here we go.

Get him, Swaig. I think this posse better. It takes more than them fancy punchlines to body several. But entertain them with them sorry efforts. But Q, we not cut from the same cloth. I'm Kevlar. You polyester. It's Swae Sivers a bonafide body catcher versus QP Y'all smell this homie fellas? Your lines be clever but Q you not hanging with me.

I'll smack your head off, catch it and talk to it like I told you quit playing with me. Get on my quest in Marf shit and steal the tapes so there's no evidence and walk around with your head in my backpack like preacher from Dead President. Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh!

Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh!

Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh!

Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh!

Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh!

Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh! you think you the better man? Never. Well if you think you spittin' and your music is hittin' then you must be a QP of hallucinogenics. The truth is I'm offended and y'all should be too cause they repeat they bars now

cause they think we too stupid to get it. I mean... Fuck that. Team Homme, Rebel Arms, Bars are us. Barbarian bully rappers, why bother us? What? What? What? In any scheme you can conjure up, the fuck I'm dealing with sons for. I'll fuck your father up. Harlem in the building.

Even the dude's laughing. Even the dude. That is a legitimate conquest. That dude was laughing. He had no choice. That dude was laughing pretty hard. God damn, dude. The name of their crew is called the Sons. That's the witness.

They were shitting on a nigga's squad. That's the name of their crew. Sons. So, you know, if I can deal with sons, I'll fuck your father up. How long does it take to get used to tasting another man's spit, though? Because, I mean, you guys were spitting right on each other the whole time. Well, he's shorter than me, so I want to taste enough. You know what I mean?

So I don't know how much of mine he got on him. How much of that was a total ad-lib? I don't know. Probably not much of it. I start ad-libbing in the course of the round. You know what I mean? Right, right, right. Some of it be ad-libbed.

I prepare a certain amount, and then some of it I save for when I actually see the person the day of. And sometimes you probably have something on the spot too, right? Exactly. Depending on a movement. He might say a line that might trigger a line in me. Like he might say something that I thought was mad stupid, and I might rebuttal it. You know what I mean?

Right, right, right. And like I said before, when I did this, it was a completely different thing. And he was still at Sway was doing those battles back in day two, so he knows the difference. It was very spontaneous then, more freestyle ad-libbed as opposed to now where you know your opponent- Rob Markman, Jr.: More on the spot. Rob Markman, Jr.: Right. So there's less excuses in other words.

Freestylers before could be like, I wasn't on that day, because sometimes you're on, sometimes you're off. But at the same time, it was that world of I'll battle anybody, anytime. Give me eight days notice. I'm the champ. If you come up to me in the street and want to freestyle and I can't beat you, then I'm not the champ because I know a lot of people that would like it. We had no day. We went to a battle and they probably needed an extra man and we just said, fuck it. I'll get it.

Money, money. They gave money, but also, like I said before, the prize was to be able to come back and perform. I mean, I remember being able to be introduced, oh, it's Technique, the champion from last year. And then I actually had songs that were prepared that I had written in prison. So people were like, wow, okay, not only did he come prepared for the battle before with his lyrics and freestyle and everything, but now he's actually showing that he's taking rap serious, you know what I mean? Which is why I keep Suave, Seva, Diabolic, other people that came up through the battle scene making music and being on tour, because not only are they battling, but when we go on tour, they get to show people, yo, guess what?

I make really good songs. So he gave it a mixtape, you know what I mean, working on the album. So, I mean, it's a way of honing the craft and not just making it singularly good, even though technically battle rap is like a world of its own. They have ratings. You have listings. Really? Top tiers.

Tiers. There's a league. They made it like boxing. There's a league in Canada. People been getting paid thousands of dollars just to battle. Right. Yeah. Who's the world champion?

Who? You know what? There's no fucking name. Right now, there's a kid named Disaster who holds a title for KOTD in Canada. He took the title from a guy named Paul Rich. I can't believe this. This is like fucking karate tournaments. Yeah.

This is hilarious. That's one of the reasons why I do it, because I don't do tournaments no more, but this gave me my warrior spirit right back. Now I can beat them up with words, you know what I mean? Right, that's true. That's hilarious, man. That's awesome. You got to come check one of these out one day. I need to now. This is a You know what I mean? Right. That's true. That's hilarious, man. That's awesome. You got to come check one of these out one day.

I need to now. This is a whole thing that I'm not aware of. It is a punchline, insult, in your face festival, but I swear you are not allowed to cross the line. There's been very, very few times where people have crossed the line. Emotions are hard, man. I've seen some dudes online punch each other. Oh, yeah. Yeah.

Joe, we had battle rappers last night on Naughty Show. Who was there last night? I got a good friend that's a battle rapper that went upside somebody's head. Yeah. Shout out to Mav Hoffa. Shout out to Mav Hoffa. He got in a battle with a guy that got so close to his feet. Say that again.

Mav Hoffa. What happened to him? He was in a battle a while back with a guy. He was battling a kid named Dose. And Dose got so close to him that the hat brim touched his face. Touched Mav's face. So Mav said, yo, get out of my face, God. And then he caught him.

Just snuffed him in the whole melee boat. It's on YouTube. See, only dudes who lived in New York City and are black can say, get out of my face, God. That is some shit. There's a lot of people in Milwaukee. What did he just say? What's he saying? What does that mean?

Get out of my face. He's hitting God? Is he punching God? He's not in a fight with God. There was a time where black dudes used to call each other God, left and right. I went with my friend Gerald, this comedian, and this other dude.

We went to see Terry Norris fight. And it was on like, yeah, remember? And this was back when it was like you would go to a pay-per-view site, like a bar would have it on pay-per-view. So we all went to a bar. And him and his friend was like, as Terry Norris was fucking this dude up, it was like, he can't deal with the speed, God. He's handing him, God damn, God.

And every other word instead of like... Rob Markman, Right. You know, that came from like the 5% Nation. Rob Markman, 5% Nation. So it is relegated very much to Latino and black people in... East Coast. Rob Markman, More in the East Coast. Yeah, you still find pockets of it, but at the same time, it was like instead of calling each other nigga, they decided to call each other God.

They said that God lived within every human being and you had the ability to either be godly or devilish based on the responsibility of your own behavior. That there were lessons, you know, 120 and that you had to study at the guard. At guard hours, 7 o'clock, 7 being the guard number, a lot of numerology involved in it. being the God number, a lot of numerology involved in it. People a lot of times criticized the aspects of it that was splintered from the Nation of Islam, which again isn't in line necessarily with exact Shia, Sunni, but at the same time has the core message there and has the ability to unite people and take them out the gutter and be an individual who used to be a crackhead and now you're completely sober and your life is different. Similar to the way people will do it with Christ in jail or something like that, but

at the same time, something that's based more on reclaiming the things that we lost ethnically through being brought here through slavery. And I think that while it was a positive thing, I would like to see more traction and more historical references behind it. But I think when you look at the language that people used in New York it's very very unique to say the least and call people son all the time and someone else someone get offended by that you'd be like yo I don't mean like you're my son like you're my child like I'm treating you like a baby I mean you

know we sons you know we have brother right that instead of adopting different language to try and get away from your you know my nigga nigga you know we have brother right like that instead of adopting different language to try and get away from your your you know my nigga nigga you know what i mean but i understood where it came from and as long as it comes from a place of love i'd be i'd rather have somebody hey what's up god hey what do you say to somebody like that yeah the power's in your hands you know what i mean you could be evil or godly thank you man i'll shake over that in a glass of water it's certainly a sense of empowerment line it's like you're empowering each other calling each other god you can't even think about suicide enjoy your day stupid everybody's running around calling each other god you got it good man everything's good are you well fed stop your whining

the fuck stop you whining bitch y'all gotta wear this hat man for all the the squatchers out there the world do you hear about the bigfoot dude man yeah should take a moment of silence take a moment of silence for a dude who dressed up like bigfoot and and and died in montana this motherfucker was trying to do a bigfoot prank and scare people. He was in a suit. What? And he got nailed by a 15-year-old girl. He flies through the air. His body lands on the ground. And then a 17-year-old girl runs over him. Holy shit.

So he got killed by two teenage girls. And that's what he's trying to do. He's fucking wearing a big monkey suit or something. It was actually a military suit where they cover it with fur. And he's trying to scare people by the side of the road. Oh, you mean like snipers do? Like a sniper?

Exactly. Big furry suit. So he's jumping out of the side of the road trying to scare people because he thought it looked like Sasquatch. So this poor fuck. And he got nailed by one car. And then he got...

Ran over by another one. Is the world lighter, Joe? That's what Bill Hicks would say for sure. It's sad, man. That is sad. And it's really sad for all those fucking poor dudes out there that want to believe in Bigfoot when they keep seeing shit like this. I'm like, damn it. I keep telling people to stop.

Stop with the Bigfoot thing? Stop already. You say that, man, but you know what? I'm having Survivor Man is coming on this show. You know who he is? Les Stroud. He's that guy that he'll go to an island by himself. Don't tell me he said he saw one.

He's had two encounters. He's had one in Alaska and one somewhere else where he said he was in a tent and doing something and was just lying there and he heard something heavy

walking through the woods making monkey sounds. You know what it's called? Survivor Man eating the wrong kind of grass. Survivor Man having botulism. Survivorman on weed. He might have been high as shit, yo.

He could have been. Or he could have eaten some raw mushrooms. Hearing something is a lot different than seeing something, though. Yeah, here's the other thing. Jane Goodall, who is a world-renowned primate expert, said there's a 100% possibility that there's an undiscovered primate in the Pacific Northwest. She said that too many people have seen it.

They have the exact same thing. They talk about it. And it has a direct link to an animal that lived in Asia that might have come down the Bering Strait with humans. So whether it still exists or not, maybe. But she was like a world-renowned, legit primate expert, and she was convinced. My only thing, though, is that if that really happened, if there was a relic species of animal, I firmly believe that this government would have grabbed it, put it in a fucking zoo, hunted them all down. We don't have the resources to do that, believe it or not.

To try to go to find an unsubstantiated animal, it would really cost an incredible amount of money. And this is a government that I think would spend that type of fucking money back in the day or have done it at some point because where the fuck else do these texts? Are we really having serious questions? Brian, stop it. Stop interrupting us. How do we get on Bigfoot? Of course we do, man. What if it's legit, man? The hat.

Listen, I think it's an important thing when we're asking every person that comes on the show, do they believe in Bigfoot? Over and over and over again, we've asked a question. I think it defines people. I think the only thing that I do believe in Bigfoot. Over and over and over again we've asked a question. I think it defines people. I think the only thing that I do believe in and I haven't said- It defines people. What the fuck does that mean? Instead of defines people. That means shit.

Jesus. You know what really fucks it up for me? Is that there's too many shows, oh, searching for the monster. And every show is a rerun. It's the same show in a different place. They're like, do you hear that? Do you hear that? What was that? Did you hear? Oh my God. Oh, searching for the monster. And every show is a rerun. It's the same show in a different place. They're like, do you hear that? Do you hear that?

What was that? Did you hear? Oh, my God. And then the night cam shot where it's like nothing is there. Oh, my God. I got a whole bit about that. I was watching some shit on Animal Planet. They were trying to tell us that mermaids really exist.

Yeah, what the fuck was that? You see what I mean? That bullshit. I didn't even click on that. I saw just mermaids exist. Talk about mermaids with evolved cavemen that when the waves hit the land, some of them went inland and some of them stayed in the water. Get the fuck out of here. And the mermaids became...

And we don't even know. We take boats everywhere. No one sees a mermaid. What is this, a fucking Tom Hanks movie? Some dude on the coast of Belgium fishing. Talk about he was catching fish with spears in him already. I'd believe mermaid before I'd believe Bigfoot. Really?

Yeah. Oh, you're so silly. No, no. I think it's... No, no. But he's right statistically because we don't know what the hell is in the water. We've only mapped out, what, 3% of the ocean. They could definitely be...

Yeah, I know. And there's unicorns out there too somewhere. You never know. Imagine if you went down there and fucking... What was the dude with the trident? Who was Nemo? Who was the fucking god of Neptune? God of the underworld?

Can you imagine if we sent a fucking sub down there and we see this dude? 10 foot tall Greek dude with a fucking trident in his hand. Yo, they must have put some extra gas. Oh, shit. Let's get the fuck out of here. I would know. I would check.

I would check. Yo, listen, I would check my oxygen to see if it would be replaced with whippets or some shit like that. What the fuck is this shit? If you look at us in comparison to monkeys, look at us as comparison to the most intelligent primates, the one that are using to them, we're space aliens. We're driving up in Jeeps and shooting them from the ground. Their chest explodes. Like, we're space aliens. We're driving up in Jeeps and shooting them from the ground. Their chest explodes.

We're super gods. Could you imagine the difference between us and Norse gods or Greek gods? Not that much different between the difference between us and a god and the difference between us and a monkey. It's like we're in the middle. Imagine if they were real. You got to the bottom of the ocean and you found out there's a whole fucking civilization down there. Of giant 10 foot dudes with magic. I'd be like, where the fuck y'all been?

What y'all been doing down here for all this time? Making lightning bolts. Staying away from y'all. We hate y'all. We need y'all to make resources for us. We're just waiting for you guys to die. Zeus and all that. All ancient cultures have a history

of talking about especially extraterrestrial activity. They talk about people coming from the stars. Like I said before, it's not something that I necessarily say that I definitely believe to, but I subscribe to the possibility that

that may be true. And we had an interview about this a while ago on something called truth is scary dot com. And my whole point was, what if the aliens are not three dimensional? What if they're two dimensional? What if they're microscopic? What if they come from another world where they exist inside a water molecule? You know what I mean?

And the way just like you gave that that that analogy about the way we appear to those animals, imagine if they are watching us the way we watch those animals, the way we'll get in a plane and look down on them with a satellite and see their movement. And they don't have to be anywhere. They can be in a fucking air molecule, a dust particle, right there up in the ceiling, being like, oh, I'm just observing these big

gigantic dinosaur-like monkey ape things that took over this planet, you know what I mean? Look at their mating rituals. They all go into a hot room and loud music plays and then they get inebriated enough to take a female home, you know what I mean?

They place a plastic cover over, you know what I mean? They place a plastic cover over their mating instrument and put it in her because they want to fuck her, but they don't want to get her pregnant. We must be fascinating to people like that. Somewhere along the line, girls started dancing by backing their ass up into you and just rubbing it back and forth. I ain't complaining. I ain't complaining.

I am not complaining. But I remember when that was not dancing, nor was it normal. Like, if a girl was doing that, like, in the 80s, if a girl in a club just backed up to you and was putting her pussy on your dick, everybody would be like, oh, shit. Look what's happening here. Oh, shit. And then reggae came.

People would be like, what? They heard a little bit of Bob Marley, lost their fucking minds. They got a hold of that Jamaican weed. Could you be loved? And be loved. That was a great documentary, by the way. Anyone who hasn't seen that Marley documentary,

really interesting shit. South Pole told me to watch it. I haven't seen it yet. I never knew, for example, his dad was like 60 years old. His mom was like 18, 19. Great documentary. His dad was like 60 years old. His mom was like 18, 19. Real ill. It talked about his racial strife since his pops was white and his mother was black.

It was really, real, real in-depth. And when they talked about it, the people in it were very honest. They were like, you know, did he receive ridicule? He's like, yo, ridicule is not the word, yo. He was lambasted for being biracial. And I think a lot of his thoughts about how humanity should be one grew out of him having so many people have a problem with him because of this so-called idea of race, where in his mind was like, yo, I see the person inside people rather than that. true story about what is an imperfect human being. Somebody who obviously had extramarital affairs, had all these other issues, but still was true to his family, true to his roots. It presented a

very complete version of a human being and I was really impressed by it. I recommend it for anybody. I'm not making no money off this. This is how you know it, and he's being honest. I'm not making no money. I don't know the people who made the documentary. I just loved it. I thought it was good. My thoughts on all that is I want to tell people about everything that I like, you know, whether I'm getting paid for it or not.

And eventually you make money somehow or another doing that. As long as you're on it. I mean, there's enough shit that you're going to really like. Like when we, you know, we sell Alpha Brain or something like that. We actually really like it, so we'll sell it. But it's like it's real important to tell people about everything that you feel like is good. Right. Isn't it strange that a guy like Bob Marley and so many great artists

had these fucked up childhoods that they had to deal with, and it made them incredibly powerful emotionally in the way they were able to transmit their feelings? It's almost to me sometimes like you almost got to have kind of a fucked up life a little bit. And I'm jealous because I had a fucked up childhood. I'm waiting for my shit to kick in. Wait a minute, I just watched you destroy someone

in a very clever battle rap. You're a bad motherfucker. It is happening now, so you're right, you're right. Listen, that was impressive shit. We're going to put someone else in a box. Yeah, September 15th. So explain to me, since I'm a complete novice, I know nothing about this. Explain to me, how does one get ranked?

How does one enter into these? Can anyone enter? Do you have to have like an audition first? Well, they got little leagues. Usually proving rounds. They got leagues called, they got a proving round. They got the draft leagues. These are all leagues that are like auditioning league.

You actually come in and they'll set you up with like an amateur battle to see if you can hold your own on the main stage. Okay. So they got a league called the proving grounds that's for URL. And then the draft league was actually the audition league for Grind Time which Grind Time is it's not like doing the same amount of battles as it used to do but

the main place right now is kind of like URL with KOTD KOTD don't really have a Proving Ground League or at least I don't know about it. I know they got an all female league called Queen of the Ring Oh shit. They got girls battling.

All-female battle. Oh, no. They got girls battling out there. Shout out to my man, Bebo. And they got an auditioning league called Sparring Sessions. Damn. So, you know what I mean? So, they actually, you know what I mean?

People go and audition in the little tryout league. Sarah Connor got her thing now, too. Sarah Connor got her thing. Her female league called Brars and Brass. No, Bars and Brass Raps. That's what it's called. For a dude to have a girl who's like a really good battle rapper

just fucking clown you. That's gotta be. They had a male-female battle there. They just had a recent male-female battle recently. The guy named O Red. Actually, the guy who you just saw me destroy. Yeah? You just had him.

Yeah. Did he get jacked by a girl? He did well, but she did well as well. So a lot of people saying that being that she did so well against him is looking kind of bad. But I think he had an amazing opener. I keep it real with you. I think he had one of the best openings I've seen in a while. It was a strong line.

Strong line. When someone's trying to pretend to be comfortable and they're not comfortable, I don't like that. You know what I'm saying? Like, you're bullshitting me. When you're strolling around, I look at you and you're nervous. I'm listening to you. You're not entirely comfortable with this. This is not real swagger.

This is nonsense. So I'm just going to be nice and let you do it. But this is offensive to me. But I think that when you get to that level, you're almost at the point where you can tune the other stuff out, where it's like, all right, now I can't be phased by anything. I almost have to have a perfect fight in order to win this thing. You know what I mean?

You can't, at the level where you have people choking and forgetting their bars and stuff like that, when you have months and months to prepare that's what looks really bad when it's like the fans are saying man i paid all this money and now i'm sitting here and y'all playing these games you know what the hell isn't it funny man that dudes have their whole future in hand but they still won't sit down and write shit they won't sit down and practice their stuff it's the same thing with comedy it seems like there's parallels in rap as in comedy.

Well, it is. There's like talented dudes that just, whatever, they just put in a six effort instead of a nine, and they never quite get over the hill. That's because a lot of rappers are fucking comedians, yo. The same thing, right? A lot of comedians out there. Similar. To them, life is a big joke.

Yeah. And you know what I mean? When they run into someone that's real, you real, it's a fucking wake-up call. The same way it is. What's worse is the guys who are fucking complaining about where they are. You know what I mean? You're complaining about your situation, but yet you're not fucking

trying to do anything. People make a lot of noise and they think it's justified because they have no one telling them to shut the fuck up. Unless you surround yourself with bad motherfuckers, people let you ramble. They let you talk at a certain point in time. You got to tell somebody to shut the fuck up.

And if you don't hear that in your life, that means you're not taking enough chances. If you don't hear shut the fuck up in your life... Sway told me the other day. Shut the fuck up. Shut the fuck up, Joe. I'm not rambling. He's not rambling.

Shut the fuck up. Tor life gets crazy. Get out of my room. Yo, imagine another six niggas with me in a goddamn, you know, sprinter van

going around the country. All the goons get off stage. All of you invade some Chevron, take anything we want with us. We out.

It's just that type of life. You know, I'd like to keep order in it all and really maximize the amount of exposure we can get for the message and the music. But sometimes I'm just the captain of a pirate ship. You know what I mean? And it's just like, yo, dude, don't broadside the ship, bro, because we will.

Hey, you guys. Grab a rope and swing to your ship and snatch the first necklace I see. Take a bitch hostage. All that. No need for any violence, ladies and gentlemen. Yeah, you right. Keep it all together.

Right. This comes from the host of a UFC show. This is getting crazy. Talk about no violence. I'm just trying to keep everybody happy. Hey, light up.

Light up. Keep me happy. Hey, light up. Light up. Keep me happy. This weed is a little too strong to just jump into a podcast with. This weed is like you want to sit down for a while and not be responsible for anything you say. Let's turn this to the podcast. You know what I'm saying? When you get so high, the words are coming out.

You're like, man, do I even agree with what the fuck I'm saying? Oh, Jesus Christ. Are we there right now? Sometimes I'm saying? When you get so high, the words are coming out. You're like, man, do I even agree with what the fuck I'm saying? Oh, Jesus Christ. Are we there right now? Second guessing. I'm so high. I start talking. I'm committed to what I'm saying. And I just roll with it. I'm halfway through.

I don't even believe what I'm saying. I'm so high. I don't even know what the words are as they're coming out. I'm going, OK, I'm saying that too? You don't even want to hear the playback later? Yeah. What did I say on the Joe Rogan show? You're Joe Rogan, bro.

You fucking know. Somebody sends you a message about something you said. You're like, oh, shit. We're going to boycott you, Joe. For what? Well, people do that all the time. They get mad at me just for like, they'll take one specific thing that I say. I'm like, I'm just talking shit.

I'm a professional shit talker. I don't believe 80% of what I say sometimes. I say it for effect, okay? Because it's ridiculous. This is a fucking comedy pocket. Occasionally, I'm not funny at all. And I'm being honest. But you should be able to tell the difference. Stupid. Pretending there's no subtlety

to language. The context is not important. But isn't that the genius of comedy? Of having those really serious moments inside something that's very, very powerful. Like someone just once told me that you can get the pulse of a nation from the pain in a comedian's actual act. And a lot of comedians, they come from broken homes, alcoholic parents. In other words, just like in battle rap or in these hip hop scenarios where you have people that overcome these incredible odds. That in all truth, they are the exception to the rule.

They're not the rule. Somebody that grows up in Brooklyn in the projects without their father around is not going to grow up necessarily to be Jay-Z. You have somebody that grows up out of that, and that's what makes it so amazing. And is it one out of 100? Right, one out of 100,000. And you have a guy who wants to be funny who says, yo, I'm going to practice this. I'm going to show up to all the clubs.

I'm going to work these little routes. You also always take that blueprint. Sometimes all it takes is for you to see that person grow up like that, to inspire somebody else, you know what I mean, to take that role. Yeah, you always need somebody who's ahead of you, to inspire you. To me, it's also older guys, guys like Pryor and Kennison and guys that came before. You always have to have someone better than you to aspire to. And if you don't, make that person up.

No, no, no. I had a great dude. I had a brother of mine by the name of, I'll shout him out right now. I'll shout out my brother Breeze Ever Flowing. Breeze Ever Flowing. That has to be a black guy. There's no way. There's no way. There's no way you could ever get away with being Breeze Ever Flowing.

Maybe a Chinese dude. A really cool Chinese. He's Brazilian. Brazilian for sure. Yeah, they can pull that shit off. Breeze Ever Flowing. Breeze Ever Flowing. Brazilian, that's perfect.

That's some go with the flow type shit. That's some Hicks crazy shit. When I was young and I was right on parole, he was one of the first people that acknowledged and was like, yo man, you're really good at this and you really got a lot of stripes of battle rap. You should take it another step further. You know what I mean? I work with him.

I did a song with him called Land of the Gun way back and he just called me one day. He was like, yo, I want some bars from you on a song. And when I saw him, it was at a time when he was the champion. You know what I mean? So for him to be on a pedestal and still show the younger brother's love and be like, yo, young man, I know you just got on parole. You're trying to rebuild your life. Try these events and that.

And just giving me work at pointers, punchlines. I love hearing shit like that. Stuff that people, when they actually go back, now they ask me all the time. I'm always involved In the battle scene In a place where I come And I throw up

A couple hundred On every event Or I come up Throw shit on the battle Where people are like Oh man Oh you bet You guys bet on it too

Bet or I just put up A purse to say Hey man Y'all can split this You know Six, seven hundred dollars Whatever you know what I mean Or if somebody out there

Is talking reckless We'll take your money Don't do it. There was an event that just happened called Summer Madness 2. And there was a kid named T-Rex who happened to be from Harlem. He battled a kid named Aver from St. Louis. And during the battle, P. Diddy gave. Well, after the battle, P. Diddy.

During the battle, P. Diddy made the announcement that whoever wins, he's going to give him 10 stacks. And after the battle, he wound up giving $10,000 to this dude named T-Rex. Yeah, that's the best. Live, came out with stacks. Right here, T-Rex won that. This is exciting shit. Yeah, damn. Yeah, man.

This is danger. This is danger for the techie boys, though. There's cash prizes. And I think what's interesting, though, to me, aside from the actual fanfare of it, is seeing the course of evolution. Because there's some cats that really come out with music that you could see, damn, there would be something interesting

about it. I would be interested to see what this person would do with their songs. And then there's some people that you just look at them and like, all right, bro, you're going to be a battle rapper. I hope that you have a union job lined up because there's nothing really interesting about you as an artist or a unique individual. You're going to spit some generic stuff, at least make it interesting for me. So that's why I guess Breeze always wanted to work with people that he saw that had a creative fling.

The way I listen to Suave Sever's music and stuff like that, it takes you out of the element of just battle rap, their concepts and stuff, and music like that, and then DJing other elements of it, that's a complete version of hip-hop, you know? Comedy is not just telling a joke, it's the delivery, it's the weight, it's the honest truth, it's saying who the fuck you are and what happened to you in your life, rather than just gunning up there and going one line after one line. I mean, that's Henny Young when that's classic, but at some point we evolved from that into something bigger. Yeah, comedy, it's so important, the context and the fact that you can say what you were saying earlier,

that you can have these really intense, real moments and then break it up with some laughter and make a good point, and then it all of a sudden becomes funny. And without having all the different aspects, like really offensive shit that you know someone's not being real, they're just fucking around. My friend Joey Diaz has a great joke about transvestites. Joey's this 300-pound Cuban guy. He goes, I love transvestites. He goes, they cook, they clean, you can beat on them every once in a while. The cops come, who are they going to believe, me or some dude with a wig and a black eye? It's a fucking great joke. The cops come. Who are they going to believe? Me or some dude with a wig and a black eye. It's a fucking

great joke. It's ridiculous. He goes, there's no support groups for these people. Oh, come on. But you know what I'm saying? He's not really slapping transvestites. He ain't really getting his dick sucked by dudes. He's fucking clowning. He's having fun. He's not advocating beating women.

He's just saying, hey, you know what? He's saying beat up a transvestite. He's just advocating beating women. He's just saying, hey, you know what? He's saying beat up a transvestite. He's just being ridiculous. He's being ridiculous. He's not really having to lie to the cops. He's being silly. Should I feel bad if I snuff a transvestite, though? Should you?

Well, it depends. If someone doesn't tell you. Dude, what's his name? Shamrock. I read this on the plane over here. He broke up a fight, right? He broke up a fight. Hold on, hold on. This is interesting. He broke up a fight, right? Yeah. He broke up a fight. Hold on, hold on.

This is interesting. He broke up a fight. You're going to laugh when you hear this. But we don't know what happened. Right. We know his story and we know her story. Two totally different stories. Two people that were arguing or something.

He jumps in and allegedly breaks up the fight. And he said somebody swung on him from behind. This is his story. I don't know what her story is. And he said when he turned around, he just was like, yo, you gonna swing on me? And he just one hit acquitted

whoever it was and then everyone started swinging. Why would you hit a girl? And it was a transvestite that he knocked out. Look at the picture behind you. She's just a girl that looks like she likes lasagna.

Let me tell you something. Is that who it was? Yeah, that's her. Is that her? She looked like Daniel's son. Let me just tell you something. Let me me tell you something. Oh, God. Let me tell you something. Is that who it was? Yeah, that's her. Is that her? Yeah, that's her. She look like Daniel's son. Let me just tell you something. Let me just tell you something right now.

She look like Ralph Macchio in The Outsiders. You're right. Pony Boy. Pony Boy? Not Pony Boy. What was his name? The Outsiders? Yeah, Ralph Macchio.

Ralph Macchio. Was he Pony Boy? No. Pony Boy was- Pony Boy was the bleach tear guy. The other dude. Pony Boy was- Keith was Southern. You know who that looks like. Pony Boy was C. Thomas Howell. The other dude. Ponyboy was... Keith was Southern.

You know who that looks like. Ponyboy was C. Thomas Howell. This is what I'm going to say right now. Look at her cheek. Look at the damage on her cheek. This is Ken fucking Shamrock you're talking about. You're telling me Ken Shamrock punched her in the face and that's all there is? No.

Hell no. Stop it. Are you crazy? Fucking UFC champion Ken Shamrock. UFC Hall of Famer Ken Shamrock. You know what I do believe, though? She's a 120-pound chick. You know what I do kind of believe, though, is the text messages.

If the timing does add up to be correct, she probably wouldn't be that fast. She said some dude just knocked me the fuck out. Yeah, look at that. If this is the real time, She got knocked out in the Cobra Kai dojo. She had to have planned that. Listen, man. I mean, she probably did get hit by him accidentally, but I bet it was very gentle. Nah, you know what, though? I'll tell you an honest story.

I had a homegirl of mine named Lana. What do I know, though? I'm talking shit. I'm sorry. No, no, no, no, no. No, but I'm saying... You were devoted to it, remember? Real shit.

My homegirl, Lana, she was parking a car, and a dude told her to get the hell out of the parking spot. This is a true story. And she was like, no. So her and him got into some altercation, and apparently this dude is like 5'8", he's like 160 pounds, and he punched her in the head, and he knocked her out, and her head hit the ground, and she was in a coma. And he knocked her out, and her head hit the ground, and she was in a coma.

Mind you, a regular-sized man punched a girl, and she ends up in a coma. A gigantic fucking machine of pummeling. You got to add that train. Train murderer killer. When you train to fight, it's a different punch. Not just train. I don't know, bro. He was in UFC 1. I don't know.

Are you fucking kidding me? Not just training. I don't know, bro. He was in UFC 1. I don't know. Are you fucking kidding me? Ken Shamrock fought in UFC 2. He fought bare knuckle for half an hour. With no break. Him and Hoist Gracie threw down bare knuckle for a half an hour. There was no breaks. Get the fuck out of here with your breaks. That's a long time.

They just would have a round back then. They would just fight until it was over. It was ridiculous. And you're going to tell me this guy punched that girl in the face and that's all that happened? He gave her a little of this. Stop. See that? Stop.

Three times. I don't know if he really did that. I don't know, man. I really hope he ain't duff out like that. But, I mean, I don't know. He just pushed her dumb hard. Well, you know, he might I really hope he ain't duff out like that. But, I mean, I don't know. I just mushed her dumb hard. Well, you know, he might have, you got to be honest, he might have thought that that was a boy. He definitely might have thought she was a boy.

No disrespect. She's got really short hair and she looks kind of like a pretty boy. But I saw a video, and let me ask you something, Joe. I saw a video that I had some real mixed feelings about concerning violence between men and women because I'm very, very honestly, I'm usually on the woman's side because I've just seen so many cases of abuse in which niggas think they get away with that and they feel tough for hitting a girl and that's disgusting to me. But there was one time where it was the McDonald's thing. You remember? There was a McDonald's employee in New York, very famous case, and there were

these two shorties that came in, and apparently a lesbian couple. And one of them was talking real reckless to him because he was like, I can't take a 50. He was like, I can only take 20s. And in New York, there's mad counterfeit bills, so some establishments, they have a policy I can't take a $50 bill.

That's common everywhere. She goes, no, I can't do it. And she starts cursing. Fuck you. You ain't shit, nigga. Yo, Joe reaches over the counter, reaches over the counter, and smacks this nigga right in the face. Bang.

Oh, slap this. No, no. But I'm, yo, Joe. But loud, loud. Like, you know what I mean? So he steps back, and he shoves her over the counter. He took one of the hands and shoves her. She tries to jump over the counter.

It takes a while. And the other homegirl runs around, right? Right, right, right. The other homegirl runs around. And when she gets back, he runs behind, like, the kitchenette and picks up, like, a metal rod. So when Shorty runs around the corner, she's, like, running over to duff him out and turns the corner. And he's like, oh. Whang.

Knocked her. Hit her. And then her homegirl jumped on him from the, whang, knocked her, hit her. And then her homegirl jumped on him from the side of the thing, and he hit her because he was fighting her right over here. And I'm thinking in my head, at some point when he's hitting him, I'm like, yo, this is terrible, this is horrific. But at the same time, y'all started a fight with him.

Y'all jumped over the counter of his job. The other one ran around the other corner and then jumped in and mind you this brother's on parole he got his parole violated got dumped back in jail it took him like six months to clear all that when he was like look i wasn't the aggressor right they released him he got off i saw that if someone's attacking you you don't have to fight fair okay it's not your fight yeah if you if someone's attacking you even if it's a woman they're attacking you they you don't have to fight fair. It's not your fight. If someone's attacking you, even if it's a woman, they're attacking you. They're going after you. What kind of nonsense world are we living in

where you're supposed to have honor? You better be careful. If you're attacking a man, if a man's worried that you're going to try to kill him... Oh, shit, that's it? Yeah, that's it right there. She did it right. Here she goes, you're a pussy. She's talking to him. Video cameras, everything. He's saying, I can't help you. pussy see look at that i told you joe she smacked him she smacked him

now she's jumping over now the other one goes around and then he pops up with the ooooh mangy man It's horrible, but the ill shit Joe is here But the white lady screaming stop where were you screaming to stop when they was punching him in the face and jumping over the counter well because you should have been screaming stop and get everybody get the fuck out there he kept on hitting him yeah that's what it was that's what it was he kept on she turned both of them down at one point he kept beating he went he went real close to murder now mind you she got me griddled he got he opened murder's door no no, nah. Before. She got McGriddled.

Because before anybody says nothing. Because before anybody says. Come on, man. You're wrong. I'm not talking to you no more. She got McGriddled. We hear you tell jokes too. You're banned from the show, Red Band, for like a week. Take female sensitivity training for Red Band, yo.

It's very rare that you see a dude beating the fuck out of a chick with a metal pipe and you're rooting for the dude. Yeah. But I'm rooting for him, man. What are you doing attacking him in the kitchen? You know what, though? I'm not advocating violence towards women. I'm not advocating.

The other thing is this. They acting real tough, man. You went in there and you jumped on a dude, but he didn't do anything physically to you at all. Nothing. He said, I can't help you. And you slapped him while he was doing his job. All he was doing was doing his job.

That guy's defending himself against two. They should have never put that guy in jail. They should have looked at that video. And I guarantee you that was a racial incident. Let's just fucking spread a fire right now. No, they were both. Everybody was black. Yeah, but who?

The cop? That was a. Listen, I'll tell you. The cops play a big part in that shit, because I got into an argument one time with a girl, and the neighbor called the police on us for fighting. No one was there. When I left, I came back with family members to just get my things and leave, and the police pressed charges on me.

You see what I'm saying? The girl was sitting there telling the police, no, I don't want to press charges. But the two cops in fucking Beverly, Massachusetts, of all places, were like, we don't care what you say. We're arresting him. If this guy in this video is a white guy and he's being attacked by white chicks. Yeah, let's. And he hit him with pipes. I wonder what would have happened.

They would have caught it a porno. You're a sick fuck, man. Bang, bang. But again, none of us are here advocating violence towards women. There's nothing about any of that that's funny. But if you attack someone, like I always tell people, listen, would never hit a hit a girl hit a woman ever in my life like even if she was pissing me off i'd get the fuck out but i swear if i saw a woman jumping my sister my daughter i'm sorry like that that is i go into survival mode you might as well be a squirrel you know what i'm coming after you and

i'm gonna rip you off and if you happen to get thrown across the street, you know what I mean? You're attacking my baby, my daughter. Like, the fuck is this? I don't care what sex you are. You could have a knife. You could have a gun. Who the fuck knows? You got to go.

I'm sorry. And if you got to go to sleep, well, that means you got to go across the street. I don't care what you are. You could be a transvestite. You could be transgender. You could be confused, bisexual, trisexual, a man, a woman, whatever it is. I don't care what you are. You could be a transvestite. You could be transgendered. You could be confused. Bisexual, trisexual, a man, a woman, whatever it is. I don't care who you are.

Asshole, black, white, Asian, Latino. I don't care who you are. Don't put your hands on nobody in my family. Common sense would tell anybody that as soon as you make a decision that you're going to hit somebody, just expect to get hit back. It don't fucking matter who it is you're hitting. Sometimes when you could sometimes you when you was a kid you might have wanted to hit your parents back right you get hit enough times you know i'm saying i don't hit women but i know enough women that'll fuck a bitch up for me yeah but what i'm saying is but what i'm saying is that's real no that's real like i got a sister my best friend friend named Titi. I call her every time. When a woman touch me and get crazy, I call Titi.

She go... Yeah, but some people... You don't have... You have some restraint. But you're... Real shit, though. I got cousins. We got family.

I'm a trained... You know what I mean? I've been trained in the arts, so I don't really want to put my hands on no one. By the way, that's another thing only black dudes can say. Trained in the arts. That sounds cool. When a white guy says that, he sounds so retarded.

Hey, what's up, bro? He sounds like he does. Well, basically, I've been training in the arts. He sounds like he got paintings all over the house. Imagine that. Hey, what's up, man?

You know, all my off days, I train in the arts, bro. You know, I take a fucking bong hit. Let's pack a bull and train in the arts, dude. Sounds like you got a tie-dye shirt on. That sounds like some billetage.

I'm not feeling it, man. X, it's Wild Stallion's rule, man. I heard they're remaking that, too. Tell me that's not true. They're making another one. What? What? They're making another Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure.

For real? Oh, no. I hope not. We were just talking on the way over here that they're making a Voltron movie. Voltron movie. Oh, no. Let them make whatever the fuck they want. I'm just tired of remakes, man.

There's enough shit in life to care about. Yeah, you're right. That's true. Fuck that. The poor Sasquatch guy. Oh, Jesus. How about that? We never had that moment of silence.

The world's lighter, bro. Hey, have you guys heard of this thing called Silk Road? No. I've been wanting to talk about this on podcasts before, but this is some crazy shit where people are selling illegal drugs over the

internet. Oh, like bath salts and shit like that? No, no, no. Anything you want, essentially. Oh, really? Yeah, and somehow or another, they're doing it through the internet. Crack, crack. I don't know. I don't know how they're doing it. I mean, the same way they sell anything online. And they're sending it, what, FedEx?

Or in the mail, post office? Yeah, it's one of the first things. If you type Google and you type the word Silk, Silk Road comes up, like, immediately. It's a weird, strange, it's a strange thing, man. It's like a lot of people are, they're able to have anything sent to them. It's a delivery service. Yeah, I don't know how the fuck they get around it, man. UPS and FedEx.

But the postal service delivered, like, this is one. I guess they use the postal service. Yeah, anything shipped ground, it stays on the ground. They don't really do that whole check. Really? There's no check? They do some places, but, yo, I know people that was getting shipments on FedEx for fucking. But these guys, they got to be crazy.

I would imagine that someone's gonna be able to find them. They find everybody. It won't be around too long. This is a wild... You're in some Scarface type ride here, son. We live in the prohibition years. The way we look back

at our grandparents and be like, isn't that a great grandparents that say, hey, remember when whiskey was illegal? I'm sure in like 50 years people look back and be like, oh, isn't that a great grandparents to say, hey, remember when whiskey was illegal? I'm sure in like 50 years, people look back and be like, remember how ridiculous America was burning all that weed that they, you know, confiscated from people.

I honestly can't think that they can continue this ridiculous thing that they're doing now. Enough is enough already. You say that. Something's got to give. They thought that in the 70s. Yeah, well, then they were off by a couple of decades, man. I wonder, man. Something's got to give. They thought that in the 70s. Well, then they were off by a couple of decades, man. Something's got to

give. Because they keep clamping down on it harder and if this Mitt Romney guy gets into office, he's going to try to pull it back even further. They're worried about the expansion of the internet, expansion of technology, to get to a point where they really can't control things anymore. Or they can't control your message.

Look, what you're doing, you're putting out all your shit online. You're doing it all yourself. You're giving it all away for free. They can't control your distribution at all. They have no control over it now. It's completely out of their hands. So whenever something like that happens in business,

the government also sees it happening to them as well. I mean, the ability to use the internet. Why can't we vote on the internet? Why can't we figure out how to do that? When we can do that, then they're not going to be able to stop people from analyzing the raw data. They're not going to be able to stop people from exposing

their fuckery. Someone's going to WikiLeaks them or figure out how to get a hold of the files that show corrupt. It's going to all be transparent after a while. That's the shit with George Bush that never happened. Isn't it funny how George, where's George Bush now? Have you ever seen a president that hides more? I honestly think that he never wanted to be president in the first place.

I feel like he was shoved into that position by his family. There are so many other people that were in line, and I honestly think he's just somewhere probably praying and fucking living in his ranch. Shout out to PH. Doing absolutely nothing. Oh, Jesus. Did. Shout out to P.H. Doing absolutely nothing. Oh, Jesus. Did you shout out to one of George Bush's homies?

No, no, no. Shout out to Dick Cheney. I did that on a song called The Rich Man's World. I pretended like, you know what I mean, like I was on some rich guy shit, and I shouted out all the people that are out there, you know, stealing and robbing from the people. That's beautiful. Because I always tell motherfuckers, yo, listen, a petty criminal and a gangster are related, but they're not the same thing.

You know, the petty criminal takes from you. The gangster makes you take his money. He says, you know what, you're going to take my $22 billion for all the oil rights of your country, or you're going to end up like Gaddafi, you know, raped up the ass and then used as a puppet by the people that killed you because we outsourced the overthrowing of your country. Unlike the Bush years where we do it ourselves nowadays, you know, we like to fund, you know, revolutions because we're playing essentially a game of chess in the Middle East. You know what I mean?

We're willing to give up the pawns. We want the pieces and we want the queen, Iran. That's the game we're playing over there. That's the game we're going to continue to play. That's a scary thing that they're going to try to talk us into going to battle with essentially a very peaceful country. Well, I mean, it's also a client state of Russia and China, which is what's creating the biggest problem.

It's like, look, dude, when you've got two big homies that say, nah, we're not going to go for this, although they are definitely scared of them them having a nuclear program because it makes them much more independent the way that you can say whatever you want about pakistan here oh these pakistan yeah but they got nukes homie and they're not playing you know at some point everybody leaves you know what i mean them in india had to calm that down because at some point someone was going to get blown off the map and have an unlivable space in their country for the next 20,000 years.

We got old ass operating systems in our brains. That's the real problem. We are basing our culture on some old ass ideas of what should and shouldn't be done. It's really old. It doesn't work anymore. It's like society has moved too quickly for our culture to catch up

with it. So we gotta fucking fix that, man. You can't just do this. You can't just start wars anymore. All this craziness of giant corporations acting this way, none of you fuckheads should be doing that. None of the people involved in even making the money, you don't want that money. The world economy can't even sustain that.

If you can do that, if you're the type of guy who can organize that kind of business deal, you can organize any business deal, you unscrupulous fuck. You tell me this is the only thing you can succeed in, and it's either this or you starve to death. It's either this or you're homeless. Is that what it is? It's either fuck the world or you can't

accomplish anything else? That's nonsense. It's just the fact that we left a loophole in and these cunts got in there and fucked the whole thing up. Doesn't mean that loophole has to be there. You gotta sew that shit up and say, oh, all these billions that you made doing this? Yeah, you can't do that anymore. You can't make that money anymore. Now it's up to you to try to funnel that shit back into the regular economy instead of trying

to make an economy out of fucking war. Right. But I mean, at the same time, there are people who are benefiting, for example, from anything. I think that's the big thing. When people talk to me about, for example, a secret society and Illuminati, we had a long conversation about this in so many interviews. I say, yo, what's the biggest secret society right now in America? Corporations. People that don't need you to be in the boardroom that will say, in other words, that's not a conspiracy theory.

People that get together in a large group of special interest individuals that probably all went to school together or have some connection through college or something like that. Or whose parents know each other or they're, you know, inheritors of some crazy stuff. But at the same time, it's not so much like a party with Tom Cruise where people are asking you to take your fucking clothes off. to take your fucking clothes off. It's more like this is just a closed meeting of a corporation, of a corporate entity that's going to decide the future based on profits. They be getting crazy with that Illuminati shit,

talking about the contract, the 20-page contract. That's it, 20 pages? I got a lease for an office building, it's 55 pages. You have to ask for a blood sacrifice. Right, you have to ask for a blood sacrifice. All these insane things that people say. I think that would be the craziest shit ever. Could you imagine if you joined Scientology and they took you to a ball and there's Tom Cruz there and everybody's wearing a mask and you got to leave your cell phone in a

I know what I would do. Start fucking everybody, right? I would leave. Nah, start fucking niggas up. Get away from me. I'd have to fight my way out of there. Niggas talk about remove your clothes. Nah, man. I'm not going to be able to do that, homie. Butiggas talk about remove your clothes Nah man I'm sorry

I'm not going to be able to do that homie But why'd you go there? Come on man you're fucking up their orgy You're having a good time You come up here with all this crazy Che Guevara type thug shit Yeah but y'all niggas can't have no Bukkake flick at my expense

Yo fuck that I'm going to kill niggas That's what the mask is for That's the crazy shit. It's crazy. Imagine that was a mask. That's what the mask is for. Dude's mask is for. Dude's got tired of showing up for work with a big red. They find out they're allergic to jizz.

This is horrific. They get this big Soviet Union shape. We're back on donkey sperm now. Jesus. It's crazy. We've come full circle, yo. Jesus Christ. What was the dude, Gorbachev?

Remember Gorbachev had that big stain on his head? That's like the load. The load stains you like to have so you go to work and everybody knows you got bukkake at the Tom Cruise party. You're like, so I guess you're a scientist now, huh? Oh, yeah. Oh, my God. I didn't wear the mask.

I went maskless. No, but apparently serenity, you have to have a lot of money to be a part of, you know? Really? Well, I know you have to give a lot of money to be a part of. Really? Well, I know you have to give a lot of money. You have to give a percentage of what you get. Most religions do that. The whole Illuminati thing, they say you got to have a lot of money for them to really even consider you. Yeah, you have to be probably billionaires. Yeah.

You know, the idea behind it is so crazy that all these billionaires together would try to control everything and no one's going to realize it. No one's going to know and eventually catch up. Hey, what the fuck is going on here? Is this a group of you guys just controlling everything? Everybody's so distracted by media, TV, and MTV. You can do that. Pregnant at 16 shows. Exactly.

Look, funny, I was having a conversation when I was on my way to rock the bells in the car about the different aspects of... What is rock the bells? I've heard of this. It was a concert series that happened. Is it the biggest hip-hop festival in the U.S.? Festival.

Really? Where was it? Not even in New York. They started actually in L.A. San Bernardino. Then over there in San Fran, Mountain View. Then they're going to have one September 4th in Holmdel, New Jersey. September 2nd.

Oh, 1st and 2nd. September 1st and 2nd. It's a two-day event. Okay, so what was happening? And they had like a big, New Jersey. September 2nd. Oh, 1st and 2nd. September 1st and 2nd. It's a two-day event. Okay, so what was happening? And they had like a big, gigantic concert. We were talking about this. We were talking about the difference in societies, the way that like in North Korea, for example,

and China will have this policy of trying to ban as much information as possible. And the U.S.'s strategy and more Western societies is to say, hey, you know what? Let's just overflow them with information. Flood them with so many websites, so many contrary facts or lies and facts, and give voices to people that are on the extreme instead of individuals that really did the historical research to say, yes, this actually happened.

And when you flood them with that information then it's like well what the fuck is your source where are you bringing this from and then it's like a never-ending chain so i think that's the alternate to that's an alternate control method to denying people information giving them so much that they have no idea what's real and what's not there's no discerning uh footnote to sit there and say, all right, this website is legitimate or this is, you know, it's just a website. That's such a good point. I mean, we hear for book reports now kids are using websites. I didn't know they had that when I was in high school.

You know what I'm talking about? You've got to write a book. I wish I did have some websites. Oh, my God. Kids today have way more access to information. It's way easier. You don't got to walk to no library. Your library's in Google, yo.

Yeah, for real, yo. Britannica online. You could wear headphones and talk to your phone, and your phone will tell you what the fuck it's typing. Exactly. You could talk into your phone. Your phone types things out now. I mean, these Siri, and they have a thing for Google,

the same thing, the Android thing. We ask it questions, and it gives you answers. That's fucking bananas, man. It is, man. We're Jetsons right now. Yeah, we are. We're straight Jetsons. All we're missing is the flying cars.

Just the fact that your car is a fucking, everybody's car's got a navigation. All you have to do is give someone the address. I have never told anybody how to get anywhere in the last, like, four or five years. Remember MapQuest, where niggas was reading the thing on the paper, like, yo, yeah, I got to turn left here. Our phone, we got GPS on it. And then to go back, you had to have reverse MapQuest. Like, instead of...

Reverse the MapQuest instead of looking at it and going backwards. I used to fly into places and get completely lost. I'd follow someone's directions. Like, I'd rent a car and I had to do a gig and, like, do a college that was out in the middle of nowhere. And I would have to, through Michigan, I'd have to drive past this farm and take a right here, and it's the wrong farm.

Terrible fucking directions. And there was nothing you could do. Nothing. You got to keep driving and hoping the next hill, as you came over, you would find a store that someone could tell you where the fuck you were. Right, right. No idea.

Complete, no map. I didn't have shit. I used to like those days, though, because it made me worldly. I used to like getting lost and finding my way. That shit was just right. You was just high, and you didn't give a fuck. Fucking nigga, I'm high.

I'm here on 145th, man. Whatever it is. Man, my boys used to hop in the cars and just hit the road and just get lost. Yeah. You know what I mean? That's how I discovered a lot of hoods that I hang in to this day.

I leave New York and go hang out in BMO or go hang out in Miami or Detroit or something crazy. Right, just go through. Just because I just passed through and met people and still rock with them to this day. Yeah, you know, I did, when I was a traveling stand-up comedian, when I first started doing that, that was the constant thing was driving to all these places. This was no GPS, didn't know where the fuck I was half the time. The connection between people back then was nothing compared to today.

It's like there's an awakening. And the whole world is alive and connected now. It's really fast. It's so fast. The matrix. It is instant. It's real time. It's real time.

You know what's going on in New York right now if it concerns you. Thanks to Twitter. Yeah. Like Twitter and all that. But it's good too, right? I mean, I think mostly I'm seeing good things from it. Mostly I'm seeing honesty from it. I'm seeing there's a lot of people that are assholes on Twitter that aren't on Facebook

that are assholes because they don't want their face in the pictures and shit. They don't want everybody to really know who the real person is. Because a lot of people that are shitty on Twitter, they're cowards. They have like a fake name. I got a name for them. I call them Yodo. Yodo? You're only tough online.

That's what it's named. Yodo. Yodo dude. I can't stand him. They're out there selling wolf tickets. It's unfortunate. I want all of them. I want all those wolf tickets.

But we buying all those tickets today. I haven't heard the word wolf tickets since juvenile detention. Yeah, that's what we doing. I say the same. You selling wolf tickets, I'm buying them. All of them. All of them. Yeah, it's unfortunate, right?

What the hell's a wolf ticket? There you go. There we go. I knew it was coming. I knew it was coming. Hit him, Swain. Wolf ticket is when you're selling, selling When you talking a whole lot of shit Like you tough

And just selling Just talking a whole lot of reckless And somebody finally call you a bluff Like I mean they bought your wolf ticket You talking reckless And selling wolf ticket And for me to be like

So what up now pussy That's me buying your wolf ticket Oh shit That's a lot of it right A lot of it's just Pretty much a lie Yeah Yeah

It's annoying too Pulling somebody's annoying too pulling somebody's card yeah that's what somebody caught that shit's annoying it's what it is wolf tickets you know there's a real issue with with hunting wolves these days did you know that they're they're starting to hunt wolves again they reintroduce wolves into a lot of uh america and uh apparently now they're starting to fuck up cattle and they're getting in bigger and bigger herds of them they're decimating the deer population and the packs are getting larger and larger and people are like,

okay, I think we need to fucking handle this. At a certain point in time people have to realize that's not your dog. That shit's not your dog. That's a wolf. But you know what? Hunting something like that I think is different than waiting in a tree to shoot a deer that's drinking

water. You know what I i mean if you're out there actually tracking i honestly you know you ain't gonna never track one wolf you're gonna track a lot right that's what i'm saying but this is the other thing when i think about that and i look at all the ways that people hunt now like they a long time people made a big deal about sarah palin in a damn helicopter bucking a wolf from there but to to me, I understand what they were saying. Like, if you're a real hunter, you know what I mean? You're hunting something that has the ability to get you, too. You know what I mean?

You're hunting something. If I'm being hunted, that means I'm looking out for somebody trying to hunt me, and I'm trying to get them. You know, if you're going to go after a bear or going after one of these dangerous animals, that's one thing. You know what I mean? If you're shooting some harmless shit from 500 miles away, it's just ridiculous. It don't make no sense to me. If you're out there tracking a pack of wolves and you got you and your fucking two dogs and three other niggas with rifles and glocks, then God bless you, man. You're a nutcase, but at least you're really hunting yeah

if you want to look at it that way but i think uh i don't advocate killing animals like that harmlessly though because no i don't either but the issue with the wolves is that they reintroduced them is that the the population had dwindled and then uh they reintroduced them with these these northern uh canadian wolves and they're bigger they're just they're bigger wolves these are like 200 pound wolves damn They're fucking big, man. And they're healthy as shit and they got big packs. And it's time for some management. They're having real problems with them.

And people are worried about them now. It's like in Montana and some places, people are starting to worry about wolves. Big fucking wolves. They killed a guy, or a woman rather, in Alaska about two years ago. It's the last fatal attack. And I didn't know there was a lot of fucking attacks back in the day, like the fatal wolf attacks.

Like if you go back in time, like in the 2000s, there's been dozens of them. But then when you get like really crazy and you go back to the 1800s and shit, and then the 1700s, there's a lot of fucking fatal wolf attacks, man. Wolves killed a lot of Fucking people man They were killing people All the time That's what that

Big bad wolf shit Was all about You know when we were kids It was like the big bad wolf Was gonna get you That didn't make any sense to us Why am I worried about a wolf It's like a dog

We haven't seen no wolves But they did have a Bobcat scare In Reno Goldway Dude in Japan In Japan Wolves killed people I caught that I caught Japan, wolves killed people.

I caught that. I caught that. Wolves killed people all over the world, man. If you go on Wikipedia and you find the wolf deaths in the 1700s, Italy, northern Italy, Poland. They killed Japan. They were killing people in Paris. Wolves killed people in Paris. American werewolf in London.

Think about that shit, man. In the 1700s, a dude was killed in Paris by a wolf. Four people were killed. Holy shit. Yeah, but then again, Paris probably looked like, you know, some tiny enclave of what it is. Now, there's probably trees. It was smelling like bologna.

I don't know about that, quite honestly. Plus, I keep it real, there was probably garbage in the street. The wolf was going to come look for food. Sanitary, you know, the sanitation was probably a wrap. It was a much more open. There weren't as many, there was no cars on there. Not like you're going to be scared away by loud honking and engine noise. You're more attracted to the smell of horses and people and food and meat.

Listen to this shit. Baloney. Listen to this shit. In 1750, in the Yatsumi village in Japan, three rabid wolves came into town and killed eight people. Just three. Three wolves

just went on a tear. What was the samurai's idea? They should have had them katanas ready. They should have, B. Wolves caught him sleeping. But you imagine, man, rabid wolves. Wolves aren't bad enough. Now they got to be crazy and rabid.

Motherfucker. They've killed a lot of people, man. And these crazy assholes are reintroducing them. You know, animals that live off of blood grow to be a little bigger than your average animal, You know what I mean? Yeah. Plus, I mean, that's another thing.

I know that part was huge. You're living off elk hearts. You know what's funny? You know what's funny? You can see that people that are willing to fight any man or get down or they got no fear, it's a completely different story when you're confronted with an animal. Because you could talk all the recklessness and you could scare an individual. It's a lot harder to play that game, but you can't ration anything with a lion.

You know what I mean? You can't mix words. You can't squash no beef with a wolf. They're just like, look, we're going to fight and I'm going to die. You're going to die. That's how they live life out in the forest and the jungle. You know what I mean? That's how they're born.

Yeah. Distinctive. In 1986, the wolves ate 17 children in India. What? 1986? 1986. 17 prepubescent children were eaten by wolves. Where were their parents?

I don't know, man. Working, probably. That's wild. That's crazy shit, man. That's wild. Yeah. Wolves have been killing people for a long time. And everybody thinks, it looks just like my Pomeranian.

That ain't your Pomeranian, Hooker. That thing's amazing. Hooker. You ever seen somebody who had an actual wolf as a pet? Yeah, they're creepy. You ever seen a dog? You're not supposed to get around an actual wolf. Keep it real.

They will get on their best behavior. Exactly. Dogs get on an actual wolf. Yo, keep it real. They will get, they get doing their best behavior. Exactly. Dogs get doing their best behavior around a wolf. I wish I brought my friend Southpaw here. Back in the day, he's a half Native American, and they actually had like a half wolf there. All right, look at that. Yo, keep it real. That's a big ass wolf.

That's a big fucking wolf. Yeah, look it. That's one of the ones that they killed. Look at the size of that fucking thing, man. Dude, imagine that coming after you. You don't even understand. That's one of the ones that they killed. Look at the size of that fucking thing, man. Dude, imagine that coming after you. You don't even understand. That's a monster. Yo, his name was Mish.

That shit was once human. His name was Mish, and he looked like that. He looked huge. We talking about side spas. We talking about some werewolves. You're talking about a werewolf aficionado. No. Dude, come on. I'm not into any werewolves made in this. This a werewolf aficionado. No. Dude, come on.

I'm not into any werewolves made in this. This is a confused era. They don't know what they're doing. They got vampires that don't die when they're in sunlight. They sparkle. They never eat you. Like canthropy. They sparkle.

It's nonsense. Like canthropy. We're talking about the animal spirit shape-shifting. You know what I mean? We live in a world of lies. That's where it comes from. Look at that. You saw the dance.

That is so funny. Look at that fucking wolf. It's so huge. They're like 200 pounds. That can't be real. That can't be real. Oh, no, no, no a world of lies. That's where it comes from. Look at that. You saw the dance. That is so funny. Look at that fucking wolf. It's so huge. That can't be real. That can't be real. Oh, no, no, no. It is real. You know, it's real, man.

We had this guy, Steve Rinella, in here who's a hunter. He's got a show called Meat Eater. And he had another show that was on the Travel Channel where he lived like pioneers did, like made a boat out of a moose that he killed with a musket, like crazy shit, like put all this stuff together. Yeah, he killed a buffalo

with like an old rifle that they used back in the buffalo hunting days, and he would do shit like this to show how indigenous people would survive and fascinating fucking shit. Wow, okay. Yeah, but he said that's real, man. They're like 200-pound wolves.

They're big fucking wolves. Yeah, so three of that's real, man. They're like 200-pound wolves. They're big fucking wolves. Yeah, so three of them. Imagine... Three of them coming after you? Imagine a pack of those motherfuckers. God damn it, yo. Well, the good thing is... Or imagine the alpha male

out of all of them because he's got to be a monster. Oh, yeah. He's got to have a lot of bullets. The good thing is there's plenty of deer, but they're decimating deer populations in places.

They're decimating them. Yeah, they're starting to grow. Rob Markman They have no chance for survival. We got five of them, they're going to kill everything they find. Rob Markman Yeah, they're going to kill everything they find, and they're smart as fuck. They're smart as fuck, and they're mean. Rob Markman Man, they own some Velociraptor shit, right?

Rob Markman They own some real Velociraptor shit. They're very smart, come at you, they'll cut you off at the pass. Rob Markman Distract you from one side, and they cover their angles. When a wolf pack attack, they all spread out and take their angles on you. Yeah, we need to send in Rambo. That's what I say. My man Pete, you know Pete? Tank.

Pete got coyotes in his backyard, and the coyotes in his backyard, he said they be killing baby deers out there in the backyard of his crib, and it'd be sounding like, for like 15 minutes. He said sometimes he'd come out, he'd be in his bedroom, and he hears that shit, and he goes out to the porch, and it's the scariest noise you ever, it's like a whole bunch of them eating whatever the fuck it is out there, all at once. Where the fuck he live at? He live at somewhere, we're at this crib, it's in Massachusetts. A deer was in my yard this morning. I have deer that live by my house all the time.

I live way the fuck out there and there's coyotes in my neighborhood all the time. And they're basically like little monsters. You got like little goblins running around your neighborhood who will eat your baby. They will. If you left your baby out there and a coyote was on your street and he saw your baby, for sure he would eat your baby. And I treat them like a person who would eat my baby. If a coyote's in front of me, I fucking hit the gas, dude.

You better run, bitch. You better run, you creepy bitch, fucking around in my neighborhood looking to eat my cats. Not yet. Fuck you. People like... Oh, they're a part of nature. No. They're just like us.

Those motherfuckers little devils, dude. Hi. Hi, Mr. Coyote. You gotta be careful. And they pray on the week. They try to get anything that's not going to fight back. Yeah, but look, at the same time, we have to admit something, too. It's not them that encroached into our living space. We encroached into their living space.

Come on. Don't be like that, Joe. Don't be like that, Joe. Team people. Team people. I'm sorry, man. Don't be like that, Joe. Team people. What the fuck? We just want to live in caves? Team people. I'm sorry, man. This is where we're moving, right? I'm with you, Joe.

This is where we're moving. Word up. Wherever the fuck we want. We don't end up where we want. We're going to end up. Oh, you can't live in that spot. We're going to end up on a dead planet. Yeah, that would be fine.

They'll adapt. Koala bears love to nest there, even though it's the best view, and it's right next to the fucking Garden of Eden. I'm not saying you got to move that shit. Fuck you. We just can't turn it to the people from Avatar. That's what I'm saying. No, no, no.

We can't get crazy. We don't have to get crazy. I don't want to live in no cave, my G. I think we should let dolphins and monkeys and smart things alone. Leave those fuckers alone. But a in no cave, my G. I think we should let dolphins and monkeys and smart things alone. Leave those fuckers alone. But a coyote can suck my dick. Coyote gets led. The doom.

If it was a goblin, would it be okay if I killed it? If it was a goblin that lives in my neighborhood and just eats cats and rabbits and other little animals. And will eat your baby if you're in the street. Can I kill the goblin? Well, a coyote is a fucking goblin. There's a reason why people have these stories of monsters. Because they have horrific ideas in their head that are stuck there of memories of fucking jaguars eating their babies. Jaguar running away with your fucking baby.

Dragging its limp body up to the top of a tree and eating it in front of you. That's our monkey past or sea or sea monsters because they saw a gigantic shark that ripped apart a whale killer whale who knows you know we don't know when like when people were actually in the water there's people that believe that there's recent evidence that shows that people were fishing deep sea fishing for tuna 40 000 years ago 40 000 fucking ago. Who knows how big sharks were then? Of course. Can you imagine, man?

A big one today is like 25 feet, 30 feet. What about megalodons? We talked about that last time with the 40, 50 foot shark that just the dorsal fin, it comes up to that light right there. Just a big door. It'll be like a wind sail that comes out of the water. What about that big-eyed alligator they caught in the Philippines?

Oh, crocodile. 28 feet long. That shit was fucking ridiculous. Brian, pull that picture up because it's the most ridiculous. That shit is wild. We should kill every one of those motherfuckers from the air.

We should send in those predator drones. Predator drones? Like it so! Is that idiot goading a fucking coyote? Is this dude goading it with his hand? Like, hey, try to bite my hand! Ay, ay! He's playing with that thing?

Is that you, Brian? No. He's like... Please tell me this shit bites his hand. I would be freaking the fuck out right now. I would. I would hunt that thing. Is that thing playing with him? What's going on?

That doesn't look like that shit is playing. That's a baby though. Look how little he is. Yeah, he's a little something. Hey! Stop it! that's a baby though look how little he is yeah he's a little something hey hey hey stop it wait until mommy and daddy come out and we're watching a coyote bite a guy's shoe he's a little fucker what the fuck

it seems like he's playing man is this joke of a punchline? I don't know you don't even know what we watch okay let's stop oh my god let's stop that what were we talking about before that?

what video were you gonna pull up? alligator oh alligator Filipino alligator. 28 feet. It's actually a crocodile. A crocodile. Oh, yeah.

Way scarier than an alligator. The one that killed a little girl on a little canoe and all that. Yeah. The one that Joe want to drop a fucking napalm bomb on. Send in Rambo. That shit is late. That shit is late. That's Lake Placid out there, man.

Gatling gun shit on that. I have a pool cue case and it's made out of alligator and I love it. I love to know that an alligator died for this. Crocodile attack. You know what I hate, though? Fuck you. Peter's about to call this up right here. I don't like alligators.

I'm down for dogs and nice things, like cats and shit. I hate when I be in Detroit and see the old school players with blue gators on. There's a blue alligator out there somewhere. I like that. I can't stand that shit. Really? Why? There's no blue gators anymore. There's no blue gators. We. I like that. I can't stand that shit. Really? Why? There ain't no blue gators in the world.

There ain't no blue gators. We have a yellow gators on. Listen. That's a white person. I appreciate that as part of the pimp game. That's what you got to think about, right? The pimp game. I'm saying the leather part of a sneaker didn't come that color either.

You know what I mean? You right. Yeah, why would everybody wear brown like we all Davy Crockett and shit? We all just wear a natural leather color. Air moccasin. Yeah, there's something about gators, man. That's a real statement, though. You're going to kill a dinosaur to get these shoes. You know, that's the ultimate pimp shoe.

An alligator-based shoe. It's the ultimate pimp. It's conquest. Man over dinosaur. Look at that. I cut it open and I just wear it. We cut shit open and we just take chunks off. What are we going to do for Halloween? They ain't cut nothing open. They paid way I just wear it. We cut shit open and we just take chunks off. What are we going to do for Halloween? They ain't cutting nothing open.

They paid way too much for it at some specialty novelty shop. Well, what they're doing now is they're hunting them. When I was a kid, I lived in Florida and they were a problem because they were a protected species. And they were eating dogs and shit and people were feeding them marshmallows. There was a place called Lake Alice. We would go to Lake Alice. We'd buy bags of marshmallows to feed the fucking alligators. It was normal shit, but alligators have a real hard time digesting marshmallows.

They eat them, but it's really bad for them. So they'd rather eat people's dogs. They found out that people came around, you know, they're serving marshmallows with their dog. And they're like, you know, I'd rather eat your fucking dog. And they, you know, ate a couple people's dogs. And then it got to a certain point where Florida was like, okay, we got enough. Because they were on the brink of extinction there's so many people

and hunted him down but now they've made a strong comeback yeah they're in front of people's front door like no they're dinosaurs people are retarded you should kill every one of those fucks you should take a few and put them on an island somewhere so we can identify the species but the rest of that fuck you you can't have dinosaurs and kids in the same neighborhood. You can't. You can't have that. Right. You can't have that, you know?

And the fence is only going to do so much for so long. There's a python problem in the Everglades now. I was watching someone on one of them Discovery channels about a kid going to school. I think it was like in New Orleans or something. He cut through some field and an alligator snatched his leg. Oh. You know what I mean? He in the wheelchair now.

He's still living, but the alligator snatched his leg. You know what I mean? He's in a wheelchair now. He's still living, but the shit snatched his leg. Well, there's a resurgence in the American alligator, the American crocodile population, too, which is way more dangerous than the American alligator population. When I was down in Florida, one snatched a fucking dog off of a dock. Damn. Jumped up in the air, a 16-foot gator, and pulled a dog off a dock. And he could have done that to somebody's little kid. Fuck yeah.

He could have done that to an adult. They're really aggressive, and they're really strong. And they can do shit. Like, they can jump, like, six feet out of the water. That's crazy. This thing jumped out of the water and got this dog. That's wild. Yeah, and they don't kill them because they're protected because there's not that many American crocodiles. Well, there's a fucking reason

for that! We killed them off! Smarter people than us that lived around those motherfuckers killed them off. Well, they normally try to save a species when they think if you kill them off, it's going to take away from something on the planet. Like, what? Yeah, I didn't talk about that. No, no, no. They're saying that, look, in terms of the ecosystem, I will say this, that certain predators

keep everything else in balance. Right. Like, if you get rid of them completely, then there's going to be an overflowing of fish that eat all the plant life. The plant life dies, and then things get fucked up. Nature's pretty goddamn flexible. Right, no, but at the same time, it still will cause some kind of issue and some kind of problem. It's the same thing if you introduce a species that shouldn't be there to a fucking, like, if you take vampire bats and take them from somewhere they're not supposed to fucking be, you introduce them somewhere, they're going to fuck up everything. It's true. So the same principle stands that when you take something out of an ecosystem, it's still going to cause some kind of severe issue. We don't know what that is, but at the same time the immediate impact is what gets

voters, what gets taxpayers scared the shit out of, that a fucking animal is going to eat my kids. I mean, even here in California, I remember they're making a big deal about their mountain lions. It's actually a pretty clear connection between what happens when you don't have predators. What happens is you have more prey. It's really simple.

The deer population increases and they've been eradicated from areas, and the deer population has become a problem. Like there's parts of America where you have to watch where you're driving because deer will be just jumping across. And they'll bust your car to pieces. They've killed 100,000 deer in one year on the highways in Michigan, just in Michigan alone, one year, 100,000 deer.

I was with a kid one time driving an Aspen, and there was a family of deer running on a highway. One of them kicked the car by mistake. Dude, but just imagine that number, if that's true. Apparently, there's a half a million hunters, a half a million deer get killed in Michigan by hunters every year, and 100,000 of them

die on the road. That's amazing. That's scary. And why is that? It's because there's no mountain lions. So that's the problem. The problem is when there's no wolves and there's no mountain lions and then people living around deer, the deer get crazy populated. They end up in your supermarket. They end up running

around in places where they're not supposed to. But not just traffic, but also they'll eat all the grass or they'll consume other resources or they start trampling fields or they break into, for example, big farms because they can't sustain themselves off of whatever the fuck's in the forest. My point is, by your logic, we shouldn't live everywhere. We shouldn't live anywhere because everywhere we live, we're going to take away some resources from some animals. I think at some point there's a difference between that.

And my point is not that. I think at some point there's a difference between that. And my point is not that. My point is that we should learn to live more harmoniously in terms of the way that indigenous people did. I agree with that. You need to live more harmoniously in terms of nature instead of being. I mean, we could all joke here. I think it's funny to eradicate shit that I don't want near my children or my family. But listen, stop what you're saying.

What the hell is the purpose of the mosquito? Mosquitoes can suck my dick. I fucking hate mosquitoes. I hate mosquitoes. They can suck the blood out of your dick if you're out there. You live in New York City. You live in the one place that they've completely eradicated nature except for pigeons. Pigeons and rats.

They've eradicated all nature. Those pigeons have become like flying rats. Do you know what they were brought in as food? Rock doves. That's what they really are. they were brought in as food? Flying rats. Did you know that? Rock doves. That's what they really are. They were brought in as food. I'm disgusted.

People eat pigeons in a lot of parts of Europe. That's what a pigeon really is. Pigeons are rock dove. And they used to chop it up, serve it for poor ass people that raised them on the roof all the time. It's a cheap way to grow food. You know, it's like if you're fucking starving, man, and you just happen to have pigeons, they don't taste bad.

Apparently, they taste pretty goddamn good. Yo, Ox said that he was in the Heights and he saw a car come up to Cap Arouge, right across the spot from Cap Arouge on, you know, 155? Between 155 and 156, there's that little strip park. It was

real short, but they had like a ton of them. And they said that a van full of Dominican cats came out, and they said he had a net. He threw the net over all the pigeons. Catching them. Jump back in the van like, I got dinner for the family. Got like 400 pigeons. Put a big net.

In New York, they be flying pigeons and shit. I'm sure they got pigeons in restaurants. They be people that fly the pigeons and all that on top of the buildings. I know a couple people that fly pigeons myself. You think that's really chicken and broccoli? I bet you that's some pigeon.

Pigeon and broccoli. Pigeon and broccoli. I think a lot of people do it from other countries. A lot of people from other countries where pigeon is a normal part of it. General Sal's pigeon. I think a lot of Europe and a lot of places, it's considered a good food. You got people that eat monkey bread. Check this out.

It's supposed to be good, though. Yo, check this out. What do you think we was eating that time we was at the old Medina in Morocco? You don't even know what kind of meat that was, dude. Nah, but not in the restaurant. Not in the restaurant. I'm talking about the Medina. When we went into the real shit and we bought from the food stand, it was supposed to be beef.

I'm sure it was pigeon. I'm sure it was pigeon or goat. It could have been any kind of meat. We don't know what it was, but we ate it. Could have been a person. We had Chinese food in Northern Ireland, and it was the weirdest shit I've ever eaten in my life. I'm like, what the fuck is this?

Because this is not a cow. It's just not. You could tell. It was just not. Big shout out to Belfast. I'm going to be out there probably late October, early November. Shit, I won't be. Yeah, I'm finally coming out to England. Belfast. I'm going to be out there probably late October, early November. I won't be. Yeah, I'm finally coming out to England.

You went to Belfast before I went with you. Yeah, we're going back. I can't go back. There was some pork chops, like some spare ribs that we ordered. And I was like, what fucking animal is this? It was like some weird game. Like, what do you think? It'd be like opossums?

What is this, a possum? Is this a fox? What the fuck am I eating, man? You're eating a raccoon. I was not eating a cow. There's no fucking way it was a cow. But I've had like, rabbit is real good. Rabbit's delicious.

I toured Europe. We went to Malta, and they had like a special on rabbit. I want to try turtle soup. They say turtle soup is good. I've heard that's really good. You know what they're cooking right now in Puerto Rico, yo? Iguana. Is the economy that bad, nigga? Rattlesnake is really good. No, but you know what they cooking right now in Puerto Rico, yo? Iguana. Rob Markman Is the economy that bad, nigga?

Rob Markman No, but you know what it is? Rob Markman In Puerto Rico, there's so many fucking iguanas now that they're just like, what are we going to do with all these motherfuckers? Rob Markman I actually had an alligator before. Rob Markman I talked to my girl last night. She said, yo, they cooking iguana out here, B. Rob Markman Alligators got like, if a chicken fucked a scallop. That's what alligator would taste like.

That texture to it, yeah. If a chicken and a scallop had a baby. I ate frog legs for the first time in Texas. That's a weird, like, not a lot of fat. I had frog legs in Peru. It reminded me of chicken. Yeah, a little chicken-y. A little fattier chicken.

I think it was, I forget, I think it was Peru, I forget, but they had, they keep guinea pigs as pets all around the kitchen as guinea pigs. They call them a cui. Yeah. And it was ill because in New York, they had these festivals for Colombia, for Peru, and for Ecuador. And the Ecuadorians actually have this food too but at their festival they had them there and the people complained because they didn't know it

was a guinea they thought it was a big rat they thought they were selling rat in in Flushing Meadows Park they called them up they were like what the fuck and the food inspectors came down they shut the whole thing down I hate guinea pigs are you allowed to eat guinea pigs in America because we have we make silly rules I got a story about a guinea pig. You're not even supposed to feed mice. Fried that up? Live mice to snakes.

Really? See, I was about to go there. I used to have a playtime back in the day. My shit got dumb big. I couldn't even feed the snakes. I mean, mice no more. So we fed it a guinea pig. You got to take it like Al Pacino with Fredo.

You got to take it on a ride in a boat and put one in the brain. Throw that bitch in the water. You got to hold his gu Al Pacino with Fredo. You got to take it on a ride in a boat and put one in the brain. Throw that bitch in the water. Get a pig and crush it. And you see like the blood and all this shit come out of the asshole. And then it just splattered up on the tank. It's very graphic. Pythons are crazy. Well, a lot of people bought them.

And that's the problem in Florida. They got so big that they eat alligators. Listen to what I just said. Listen to what I just said. Listen to what I just said. There's a dead python that they found that ate a fucking alligator. Well, they can't suffocate him. That's the problem

because an alligator can hold its breath for hours. So they swallow these things. Then the alligator comes alive inside of them and tries to chew itself out. Doesn't quite get out, but kills both of them. Pull up the picture, Brian, because it's the craziest

picture ever it's a giant 20-foot python with an alligator inside of its body and the tail is like poking out of the body like ripped through the the side of the cage now that's awesome thrashed its tail i like that cut through i like that crazy i love that right well it is that's i mean this is some that's a conflict that's like that's the food chain controversy that's like, that's the food chain controversy. How badass is that python that eat an alligator? At least he got the alligator inside. Like, how do we be swallowed? I mean, they both lost.

I mean, they both lost. They both lost. Wait until the day that they can win. I mean, well, that's going to change the game. Well, they've done it before, man. There's no way it's the first time.

There's no way we found the very first time it didn't work out. That's some real, that's some King Kong Tong t-rex yeah it is that's that's oh look at that look at this side see it's torn out the side of its body look at the size of that python wow that thing is bigger around the waist than mine i am it's bigger around the waist than me i mean that thing will swallow you no problem no problem you ain't gonna

no problem look how god damn big that is they can suffocate me and you in like a second. That is a monster in a movie. It has a fucking alligator inside of its body, man. I mean, that's insane. Can you make that full screen, Brian? Is that possible? Look at that fucking picture. Holy shit, that's scary.

Yeah, that's crazy. Anything that would eat an alligator will fuck you sideways. Just start eating you from the feet first. You'll be screaming, no! Anything that would eat an alligator will fuck you sideways. Just start eating you from the feet first. You'll be screaming, no! Fuck you. Yeah, you're dead. Just making these big swallows and moving up your body.

What are you going to do? That sounds great. It's like a suction. What a terrifying world we live in. I say all giant snakes become belts. Instantly. Fuck you. Here we go. No more fear factor.

No more fear factor. It's going to be American Safari with Joe Rogan. Killing crazy ass animals. Oh, here we go. Oh my God. Here we go. Here we go. Here we go.

He got him. Jesus Christ. Them motherfuckers choked the shit out of you. No, no, no. we go. Here we go. Here we go. He got him. Jesus Christ. Yo, them motherfuckers choked the shit out of you. Hold on, hold on. That's a little alligator compared to that. It is. It is a little alligator, but it's not that little. Nah, man.

It ain't that little. I mean, that's a couple of feet long. He's still choking the shit out of him. If that thing was running after you, you'd be scared. Yeah, but see, he's trying to choke him, but like you say, he can hold his breath for a ill minute. He's going to have to figure something else out. He's going to kill it by crushing it.

Yeah, but that crushing thing, he's breaking bones, dude. Oh, breaking bone. He's while he's suffocating eating it at the same time Yeah, look at he's trying to swallow the motherfucker why he's still mine. It's I that's it's I right there. This is a battle Isn't one he hasn't tapped yet. This guy is not tapped yet. Oh now he tied his arm up BJ Penn style Oh, that's how BJ takes your back. BJ wraps that arm up. Wow. UFC nature. Look at this.

This is what it is. He's using very good technique. You should put these niggas in the ring. This snake has impeccable technique. I guarantee you America's coming to that to the point where we're tired of seeing people fight. We want to see animals fight each other. Animals fight people. This is Belladonna with a baseball bat.

That's going to be the next show Joe Logan. This snake has got perfect technique. He's like a jujitsu. He's like perfect jujitsu. He's like Hicks and Gracie. He's a Gracie, yeah. Yeah, he's just slowly choking you. That's Braulio Estima in the snake world.

He's just slowly fucking up that alligator. Look at him swallowing it whole. My man, that's dinner. Oh, my God. It's incredible. Look how it just keeps going over the body. Imagine if that's how we ate well why not i mean if a snake does it look what dolphins are like man dolphins are

super smart things that kill things with their face they don't even have a hand to hold on to something they can't even snap a neck before they eat i don't think i've ever seen a dolphin eat i don't think oh they they fuck up some Look, it's down to the last leg. How's he going to get that? How's he going to get that leg? Look at the space that he can make. How he can spread. Look at that.

Oh, my God. It's really sexual. I'm feeling beaten up. I'm feeling kind of throw up. The slippery end of it. It's like. That's like. That's like.

Joe Rogan lives in my. Joe, me and you come from the same world. I swear to God Get help Joe The fact that G.I. Joe identifies with what you say Is not a marker He's down to the bottom And yet there'll be a bunch of pussies on Twitter

You know lost a lot of respect for you When you said that man You really would beat off to that You got problems I'm not watching anymore Joe yeah there you go I'm with that guy look at this you got the whole thing in his fucking body where is it tear out though he's got the whole thing in there this one this one's finished away with it he gets away that he actually kills it he

crushed it a bunch you see him him like he wrapped it up. He's moving in the stomach. Oh, Jesus, it is moving inside of him. He's moving in the stomach. It's bucking and kicking inside of him. You need some tums. See if you can see it. Yeah, right there. Come on, bitch, close up on that.

That's it. That's it? Nah, he's crushing him inside. Digesting now. He's crushing him inside, though. That's incredible. That shit dead. That's it? Nah, he's crushing them inside. Digesting, nah. He's crushing them inside, yo. That's incredible. That motherfucker went to sleep. It's so badass that we could recognize that shit and film it.

You know, for a while, like, if you didn't live anywhere near that, you didn't get a chance to see something like that. Hell no, I ain't never seen no shit like that in my life. Until, like, this generation and the generation before with all those Mutual of Omaha, Wild Kingdoms, we never got to see anything. Everybody that came over here, we didn't get to see anything like that. If it wasn't for technology, we wouldn't have seen a 28-foot fucking whatever. Yeah, pull up that picture. Did you pull up that picture? That shit is giant.

The Filipino crocodile. Yeah, and it's still not the record. What a beast. They've caught bigger ones before. This one had been fucking people up in that village, too. Yo, crazy. They knew they had a real problem with this one. They caught him.

What would they do? Make a clock out this nigga? I think they brought him to a wild animal park. They were going by the damage that it was giving. They thought it was like 15 feet, 20 feet at most. When they found that motherfucker. They set up a trap that would fit to catch a 20-foot nummy. And the shit snapped the trap.

So they was like, gotta be big well you know there's another animal called the crocodile monitor holy that's a perspective shot though that that guy's they got they got him with a bulldozer it's really big but it's not as big as it looks it's not as big as the one they found the philippines just pull up um 28 foot crocodile philippines that's still being held up by a bulldozer. Big shout-out to the Philippines. Powerful Philippines. I'll get there one day. Yeah, I want to get there one day, too, just to play pool.

For real, the Philippines has the best pool players in the world, man. For real. There's a dude named Efren Reyes. He's widely considered to be the greatest pool player that ever lived. Technique should go to Russia to play chess. See if you get that picture, Brian. It's 28-foot-long crocodile Philippines. It's pretty crazy.

But, yeah, no, they have a huge population of people that play pool. Joe, you play chess? No, I don't. You don't? I would love to go out to the Philippines and lose again and again to a really hot shit My boy Mike Swift keep asking me to come out there. Shout out to Mike Swift. Shout out to Mike Swift.

Powerful Mike Swift. That ain't even it, man. That ain't even it. That's it. Oh, wait, that is him. Shout out to Mike Swift. Powerful Mike Swift. That ain't even it, man. That ain't even it. That's it. Oh, wait. That is him. That's one of them. There's one picture where it's laid stretched out in the whole village.

That one. The next one, Brian, to the right. Not that one. That shit ain't real. The next one to the right. That one right there. That's it. Boom.

What the fuck? Look at the tail, man. Yo, that shit ain't great. Look at the line of people. That's Jurassic Park right there. Oh, my God. That's Jurassic Park. You want me to ask yourself this.

How fucking hard was it for him to hide for all these years? Just in the water. The water's dark. Those things are very stealthy, my G. Woo! My G, you know, they don't have to breathe. They can hang out forever. They just go underwater.

They go and take a deep breath and then they just sit down. Hours and hours underwater. That's wild. They poke one eye out the water and look around. And they feel you walking. Yeah, they feel the vibration. They feel that shit through their body. And they don't have to eat for a year.

They don't have to eat for one year? One year. Yeah, one year. Because they don't use up that much energy. What? So when they take down a water buffalo or some shit. They're good for a while. They use all that power and they have like a two day burst of energy that goes crazy. Not to mention they got the strongest jaws in the animal kingdom.

Pull up the video, Crocodile Attacks Water Buffalo. Jesus. There's a video. Oh, I'm sorry. Wildebeest. Crocodile Attacks Wildebeest. There's a wildebeest goes up to a water hole. You don't even see the thing.

It's just water. And real shallow water, too. It'll come all the way up with a snap. It came down close to him. It jumped out of his mouth. It's like a foot just water. And real shallow water too. It'll come all the way up with a snap. It can't go close to him. It's like a foot of water. And the power that it has when it snatches a whole other thing and drags into the water. This ain't the right angle. There's an angle where they're like in a boat watching it from the water.

But this shit happens. It happens all the time. There's one that's coming out a little bit further than the rest of them. from from the water coming out one right by the rest of them yeah this dummy he's like I want to stand out and no way I'm doing that's the reach I will be I the poor series a push brought it up more on the guys is good for swim I the retard the way to be you go I don't know nothing look how I had I am a swim. He said that's the retard of the world of beach community.

Hey, you guys don't know nothing. Look how ahead I am. That's got to be him. That's the young one of the pack that didn't learn from all the other ones. He's almost on center stage, so some shit has to happen to him. Yeah, he's an idiot. That guy for sure is a retard. And I don't mean it like Down syndrome.

I mean he's an asshole. What if it's the other guy in the end part? Oh there Might be hurt. Oh, they're coming from both sides That's just hanging out right in the center. Oh, he's testing around testing the water Brian nothing's happening here. I need a video with something's actually happening. It's kind of fun now No, it's only fun when they jacked Brian if nothing happens in this video, we got a real problem here. Oh, uh oh, somebody popped off. That shit look like a barbecue in Harlem, yo. Somebody just popped off and everybody goes in another direction.

Right on the top right there. He got him. We missed it. Yeah, he's flip-flopping with him. That's not the one from before, though. No, no, that's not the good one. This one where it's really close up, and it's from the water. You're in the boat from the water, and they're filming it, and you see the thing come out of the water and snatch this.

Imagine what it feels like being the guy who's filming that. This is it. This is it. This one is fucking crazy. This week at the Olive Garden. Oh, I love ads. Is that an Olive Garden commercial? Yes.

Let's take a shout out to Alienware. This is a young African wildebeester. But this isn't a story about wildebeest. Oh! Here we go. Goddamn! It's a story about what's trying to eat the wildebeest. Oh, one got away.

That's a big, big crocodile though. That's a big fucking crocodile though. Goddamn. Fucking Nile crocodile. Man, my man, yo. Yo, that's a dinosaur right there. Fuck yeah! That's instant death if it gets you. Kidding!

Kidding, I'm kidding, that's me pulling your leg. This is a monster movie! Look at this, this is it! That's the video. Ah! Of course the Croc tries again. Jesus Christ! But Wildebeests have good reflexes. And all the croc gets is a bloody snap.

OHHHH! That's how good the wildebeest reflexes. But the wildebeests need water to survive. And the croc is still hungry. Holy shit! The croc will not be denied. What a weird world! It did not live the dinosaurs by giving up after one try.

It's like, to survive, your face dies. I got you. Oh! Look at that judo, bro. Did you see him flinging? Like a hip throw into the water. But we'll take a crack at just about anything. Turtles, impalas, baboons, humans, even this heron. It'll even pursue the poor

nature's garbage system. Anything that limps, fuck you. If they got it, let me make a request. Lions versus hyenas on YouTube. They got a joint where they show the difference between the way the female lions hunt. They're like, their job

is to get food, and the male lion is just there to kill people and just walk around with his dick out. Like, yo, fuck you. This is my shit. Fuck the lioness. Yeah, have like a... Fuck the lioness.

Eat a prepared meal that he ain't catch for nothing. He fucks a lioness for like 45 seconds. For 30 seconds. Fuck the lioness. For 30 seconds. For 30 seconds. Right, he fucks her likeess for like 45 seconds. For 30 seconds. In a cemetery. Right. He fucks a lioness. He fucks her like 17 times for 30 seconds.

Everybody just steps the fuck back. There's one lion. I forget they have a name for him. Like, which means he who comes with thunder or something like this. That's the nigga in the video. Yeah. There's one lion that's killed like hundreds of hyenas. He just jacks all the hyenas. He's huge.

And when the hyenas come around, they'll eat babies. They'll eat anything they can get. The hyenas are such a fucked up animal that the females

are bigger than the males to keep the males from eating the babies. Is it a snake lion? Not only that, aren't the hyenas the ones that throw up on themselves

to make themselves attractive to the opposite sex? I wouldn't be surprised. They're an evil, evil animal. Hyenas, the female has a fake dick. She has a giant fake dick and she mounts the male. The female's bigger.

And she gets on top of the male with her fake dick and dominates him. That's fucking... And makes sure that the male doesn't even think about eating her baby. It's so backwards. Yeah, they're crazy. That's a nutty animal. So essentially she puts a strap on and rapes every nigga around her to say, yo, don't fuck with my kids.

Pull up female hyena fake penis. Pull up that. Yeah, they have a fake dick. Is that the next shit on the menu for Fear Factor bonus season? Hyena dick. Fake hyena female hyena dick that you're going to have to eat. Hyena strap on. I wonder if they actually fuck the male or if they male. I think they just get on top of him

and rub that dick in his face. And just smack him with a fake dick. Like, yeah, you ain't shit. You ain't shit. You're going to give a lot of these dominatrices some real wet panties right now. Well, they're one of the very few matriarchal societies on Earth

in the animal world. They actually, the women control shit because the men are so fucked up. They're so sneaky. They're just evil bitches. They'll eat your babies. Where's the baby? Fuck, I was hungry.

I'm going to shuck the kids. Did you find anything? No, it's just videos of... You're right over there. Not really. Like Colin Wise, but hyenas. China, the wrestler.

What the fuck? What the fuck was that? Hyenas versus lions? She was pretty like 2000 hyenas. No, hyenas versus lions. Lions versus hyenas. Well, if you can't find hyena, fake dick.

But I bet you can. Let me try. I said hyena, fake penis. hyena fake dick. But I bet you can. Let me try. I said hyena fake penis. Hyena female fake penis. We're over here talking about the most weirdest shit. I told you I'd be coming here and just chill. Look how tough it is to deal with some women today. Imagine if they were bigger than you and they had fake dicks.

Imagine if that was our life as men. Not only that, but then their job to... I'm glad. I'm willing to want a picture. I don't even want to think about that. That shit would be ruthless. What a terrible world. We'd all go gay.

I really... That's what happens with a lot of lesbians, I think. I'd be knocking out a lot more women. Yeah, I think that's what happens with a lot of lesbians. The men are such douchebags.

They're just like, I just need love from someone. I'll take a girl. Anything. I'll take a girl. Jesus Christ. That's how we would be. What kind of men were they dealing with? I mean, that guy, that's crazy. a girl. Anything. I'll take a girl.

Jesus Christ. That's how we would be. Rob Markman, What kind of men were they dealing with? I mean, that guy, that's crazy. Rob Markman, You know what's fucked up is that we- Most dudes are bitches. Rob Markman, You know what it is? It's funny because when you meet a girl that's real young and you don't want to talk to her,

you say you're real young, but by the time you finally get to her when she's like 22, 23, she done been through a few fucked up relationships. But, you know, I just remember that when I was like in high school and the two years I went to college, there were girls that were like fresh into, you know, being innocent. Like, oh, you know, yeah, everything's great. Me and my boyfriend. And they realized that this world was about a whole bunch of griminess. And I've definitely seen a lot of females that say, you know, I'm not getting the love and the emotional attention I need from a man,

so I'm going to go, you know, deal with a woman. And I've seen them come back. They get a little bit of that world, and then they come back, and then they say, all right, well, sorry, you know what I mean? You know, I was held down. Yes, my emotional needs were met, but Shorty would just be like,

I just want to fuck, you know what I mean? Yeah. I can't stand the lesbians that talk about they hate penetration, but then they use dildos and shit. Yeah, and then they like to pretend that that's just as good. I don't need a dick. I've got this. Bitch, you don't have the kind of lower back muscles that I have.

There's no way you are generating the kind of impact that I can do. You don't have the kind of choking. Choking ability. When I grab a hold of you. Firm. Firm, but not offensive. I'm not mean. I'm not being. I'm not being.

I'm not trying to hurt anybody, but I'm letting you know what the fuck is going on here. I'm just. You can't do that. You can't do that with your strap on. Stop being. There's a certain amount of intense sexuality that you're not going to be able to replicate. Yeah, that's true. Okay. With your weak lower back. Okay. Don't give a fuck. You know... There's a certain amount of intense sexuality that you're not going to be able to replicate. Yeah, that's true.

With your weak lower back. You better be doing them dead. Fake dick is even warm. Cold fake dick. To the lesbians listening, do those deadlifts. You start doing those deadlifts right now. Get that lower back. It's not enough. You gotta do roids.

If you're a lesbian, if you wanna really be able to fuck a girl like I can fuck her. Roids? Yeah. Like when, yeah, for real. A man? Okay, forget me. Let's take me out of the equation.

I'm a married man. But take an athlete. Take a George St. Pierre. Take an Anderson Silva. Do you know what kind of a fucking George St. Pierre can put on a bitch? Could you imagine? Super athlete, you know? Could you imagine? For real? you know? Could you imagine,

for real? Yeah, but Yoko, I mean, it depends on how crazy to say. You know, you're a fucking killer. He's trying to make

a tap out of it. Tap out. Tap out. Not even trying to hurt her. Not even trying to hurt her. You're just talking about a super athlete who's getting his freak on.

Shaq. Just stop and think about that. That ain't even, you, you don't even look like you're the same species as that dude and he's even you. You don't even look like you're the same species as that dude and he's fucking you.

You know? It's this giant man from the fucking clouds and he's fucking you. Like, God, you're going to replicate that with a strap on?

Good luck, hooker. Good luck with your fucking work boots on, all 139 pounds of you. You know, weighing yourself in with a heavy belt on.

You can't. Yeah, you need help heavy belt on You can't You need help Joe You can't fuck like Shaq Stop it Yo Stop it Let's listen You know You never gonna stand

Nims kill me when he say I'm fucking dyke bitches Till they fittings fall off Once again Shout out to Nims We have a lot of friends that say a lot of crazy things. Rob Markman Beautiful metaphors.

Rob Markman Beautiful things. Rob Markman Beautiful things. Rob Markman Beautiful things. Rob Markman Beautiful things. Rob Markman But I think that to me, I love the humor that's involved in hip hop. Rob Markman You know what I mean? Rob Markman Especially in the battle rap community.

I think that's what keeps a lot of it. Even though it's serious and it's bars, that I think it's still beautiful to have that artist development. That helps you. That's one of the things I noticed about your rap. You've got a lot of humor in your shit. You say a lot of really funny shit. You say it very cutting. I guess that's the battle rap and the background that you come from.

You'll say some really important shit, and then you'll mix in hilarious ruthless shit. And it makes it more interesting. It makes it more entertaining. Because you're not just a dude who's only giving people the facts and informing people. You're informing people in a very street way

and you're telling them to suck your dick. That's the beautiful way to get a message across. You're saying it. Yeah, in so many words. You're saying it exactly how you want to say it. Well, a lot of people can relate to reality, but also relate to a joke. Yes! You know what I mean? That's why I get so fucking mad when any of this shit pops off where a comedian gets in

trouble for saying something on stage. Like Tracy Morgan got in trouble for saying that if his son was, he goes, I'll stab that little nigga. Do you really think he would stab his son? Never. He's joking around. It's no more than the Avengers are really fighting aliens. That's like what you said earlier. You should be able to tell the difference, you fucking idiots.

Yeah, man. You've got to understand subtlety. Technique said in the song, if you can take a fucking dick, you can take a joke. We talked about that last time. Yo, remember he was in a video barking on Carlos Mencia? Yeah. He was in a video on YouTube barking on Mencia. I don't – I've shared that.

He said he stole his man's jokes and shit like that. Well, he stole a lot of dudes' jokes. Mencia? Yeah. Unfortunately, he had like a problem. I hope he's – I really do. I had no hard feelings for the guy. I hope he's cleaned himself up.

But he was getting away with some shit that he just should not have been able to get away with because they were making a lot of money off of him. And so he was stealing a lot of shit and Immortal thought that- No, no, no, no. I don't- He cleared it up for me. He's like, no, no, that was an old, old joke from like Louis C.K. like way back in the day.

It's not even Louis C.K. It's like a more of a- It's almost like a stock joke. Stock. It took me a minute to even remember who Mencio Anaya was. But look, he had actually used a series of jokes. One time I actually sat back and I looked at all these YouTube comparisons because they had one for Bill Hicks and Dennis Leary. That was a very big one that has a lot of hits on it because he catches a lot of flack from

all the people that are real big Hicks supporters. And then there are people who were like, yo dude, you're not the only Latino comedian. And then they had an episode where they talked about George Lopez choking him out. And George was like, yeah, I had to hem him up because he stole

like 10 minutes of my material. He went, he did a whole, they pulled his HBO special. I don't know if that's true or not. George, according to George, they pulled his HBO special

because there was so much stolen shit in it. They had to pull it out because George was like, you can't fucking. I noticed, I remember seeing it and hearing a joke I had heard before somewhere else. He had a sickness, man.

He had a sickness. And he's a really talented performer. So he would just go out there and just do other people's shit. He knew what he was doing. And there's something wrong with him psychologically. But why would he? I don't understand this. If he was arguing with you, why would he give you the mic?

I think when you're the performer, why would you give someone else the mic? Well, he wasn't even the performer. Here's the whole story. I was on stage, and there was a dude who was coming up next. The way the comedy store works is we tag team. So if you were on next, I would introduce you. So the guy comes up, and I said he's a really funny guy, and he's a writer for Carlos Menstilia.

Because that's what we call him. We call him Menstilia. That's what everybody calls him. Wow. But you're on some real shit? I dig it. That's what we call them. We call them instilia. That's what everybody calls them. Wow. But you're on some real shit? I dig it. That's what it is. You got to cut cancer out.

You can't let it take over. So I say this, and then he wasn't even supposed to be on stage. He actually was in the audience. So he goes on stage, and he says, he doesn't have the balls to say that shit to my face. So I go, okay. And so I just go on stage. What the fuck are you talking about You crazy bitch

Oh that was you Yeah so I went on stage While he was on stage Nice Calling me out I go are you crazy You think I'm scared To say this to your face

You're a fucking thief man You're gross You're a gross person To be around Were you waiting for him To try and hook off on you Joe He knew better He knew me forever

He also knew That I wouldn't hurt him You know That's why he knew To call me a little bitch And all this different shit He knew I wouldn't hurt him. That's why he knew to call me a little bitch and all this different shit. He knew I wouldn't hurt him. Is this the footage? That's the footage of him.

He was calling me a little bitch and saying all that. But it was like a cat going, meow, meow. Like, all right, relax. Did it seem real? Did it seem to the people like a goof kind of? Oh, no, it was real. People realized somewhere along the line. People were booing him?

There was a lot of people that were supporting him in the beginning, man, especially some Latinos. And one chick yells out, he did it better. He were booing him. There was a lot of people that were supporting him in the beginning, man, especially some Latinos. And one chick yells out, he did it better. He did those jokes better. You can hear her yell that, which is a dumbass argument. But then, yeah, yeah, yeah. But then halfway into it, he realizes, this is while he had a microphone

and I was still yelling at the audience, but then they gave me a microphone and then it was just game over because I'm a real comedian. He's not a real comedian. He's a minor bird. He's a dude who has to repeat. He doesn't understand what is actually funny. So when he's free-balling or we're just having a conversation, he doesn't understand being

self-deprecating. He doesn't understand how you're coming off to the crowd. He's not objective about it. He's just pushing forward like a dummy just getting clocked. Dink, dink, dink, dink. And just getting clocked to the point where by the time the conversation's over, he looks completely retarded. I get a standing ovation.

And he tried to stand on stage and continue it. That's when they gave me the mic. But look, you know, I wish that this didn't have to happen. But the Comedy Store was a hellacious place for comedians. Because if you were a young dude who was coming up and he didn't have any TV credits, that motherfucker would throw your shit on his show. He would just steal your best bits and put them on a show. He was stealing from Bill Cosby, man. That's the worst.

We don't allow that shit in hip hop. That shit, we don't allow that. We talked about this last time, about some biting ass motherfuckers in hip hop. Good. That's beautiful. They got to keep it that way. That's where I came from, man. I came from Boston, and Boston was like the most hack-free city ever. I live out there. Do you's beautiful. They got to keep it that way. That's where I came from, man. I came from Boston, and Boston was like

the most hack-free city ever. I live out there. Do you? Yeah. What part? Well, I don't live there anymore. I live in Lynn now. In Lynn, Massachusetts? I used to live in Lynn, man. Lynn is a fucking... Dude, that's a dirty fucking sandy beach to run on. I used to do my running on that beach. That's a dirty beach.

Shout out to Lynn, Millie Mike. Yeah, when you're running on Lynn, you're really worried you're going to run into a dude with an ax somewhere. Yo, Lynn is in there. Yo, man. Shit. There are very few accident murderers up there, dude. That's a little crazy up there, man.

You might stumble upon some mob dudes chopping somebody up. It got crazy out there for a while. It's still crazy. But it's cool. It's right on the water. I lived in Lynn for a while. Yeah, like right next to Swamp Scott. Yeah, see, Swamp Scott, it's crazy how it goes from Lynn to Bling.

Like, fuck, that city right there just turns into houses and mansions. And it's like you go down the block, it's the fucking hood, bro. That's a weird thing about New York, like New Rochelle. You ever go like New Rochelle to the Bronx? It's like, it's a quick little jolt. You know, you drive like a half a mile. Mount Vernon, and then all of a sudden you're in... Mansions to like... Co-op city. Yeah, it's a quick little jarn. You know, you drive like a half a mile. Mount Vernon, and then all of a sudden you're in. Mansions to like.

Co-op city. Yeah, it's crazy. You ever been by where DP live at? DP? Yeah, yeah. Right there. Ocean Ave is the hood. And further this way towards Coney Island, it's all hood.

You go two streets down. It's all beautiful, giant houses. All Jewish people. It's weird, right? It's like you're walking into a whole nother realm. It doesn't even make sense. There's shootouts going on two blocks down. And over here, all these Jewish people got their own community.

You know where that was really prevalent? With their own police and with their own police, their own security, their own fucking schools, their own... It's everything like... Kosher. Kosher. I went into a subway on the block and everything, the whole fucking pricing was crazy. I was like, I ordered some shit and they were like, oh, it's like $13.

I was like, what? He was like, yeah, it's kosher. I was like, everything's kosher. I was like, I can't, I'm not buying this. I got to go. I walked out. I'm like, this is Subway. I came here to get something, you know, like good food cheap.

They had a kosher Subway? Yes. It was that serious. Whoa. Yes. That's how, and then- How do you make sal a kosher Subway? Yes. It was that serious. Whoa. Yes. That's how. And then. How do you make salami kosher? Yo, you don't.

They had a whole different menu. That's what I was saying. Oh. They had a whole different menu. It's a place exactly like what he's describing, only it's like a whole city. It's like New Haven, Connecticut, where they got Toad's Place. Because there's a little club that we always play called Toad's Place when we go to Connecticut. And literally, I remember going into the basement one day to the production office to get paid.

And there was a cop in there. And I'm like already suspicious. Like, what the fuck is he doing here? All of a sudden, the cop turns around. He's in a real good mood, like kind of jovial. He's like, oh, man, I'm just here to fill out paperwork. He's arguing with the guy. I said, is everything wrong? Anything wrong? He anything wrong he goes oh man we got another one i was

like what do you mean another one he goes yeah someone just got shot in the face here yesterday so we're gonna have to clear this up and i'm like damn someone got shot in front of toad's place he's like yeah that's number 17 this summer mind you toad's place is a block away from yale university so it's like that discrepancy is crazy. You've got 17 people on the summer getting shot. A little kid gets shot in the face. And then you've got one of the biggest learning institutions with their fanciful pride of being like a place. And let's not even talk about Penn State because.

God, what a strange state that was. Penn State and Dartmouth, We can skip those. Well, Swayve don't like Dartmouth. We went there. We went there one time. Swayve is never going to go back there. Oh, but this is different than what we're talking about. No, no, no.

It was different. It was because we went to the basement of a served fraternity, and they had slaves buried in the basement. What? What? Yeah. In Dartmouth? They had a slave cemetery.

What? For real? Under underneath the building. Apparently, the people who had owned the area, owned the houses, their slaves were buried underneath the entire structure. And it was like a very, very cold room. And you had everything made of stone. And there were just little writing stone here and there all around the room. And this nigga was like, yo, it's cold in here. I don't like this shit.

I don't know windows. I'm getting the fuck out of here. Rob Markman 1.: First of all, to get to the room, you got to walk down this narrow ass downward staircase. And I got to stoop down and scrunch in my body. Rob Markman 2.: Let me ask you a question. Why the fuck did they bring you down in the first place is my question. Rob Markman 1.: Yo, listen, we was about a whole bunch of people doing-

Rob Markman 2.: Because yo, if I would've went down, nah, I'm seriously speaking- Rob Markman 1.: Hold on, hold on, hold on. Listen, listen. We was around a whole bunch of people doing whippets. Because, yo, if I would have went down. No, I'm seriously. Yo, seriously speaking. Hold on, hold on, hold on. Listen, I smashed. I accept. Yeah. Listen, I went back to the hotel.

But the thing that made me mad is they were so thirsty to take us down there. Like, come to the tomb. Come to the tomb room. Come to the tomb room. They were doing whippets? Yeah, they were doing whippets. Whippets was everywhere. All on the floor.

The trash can was overfilling with them. Like, overflowing, falling out the trash cans. And Whippets is, what is it, nitrous oxide? Yeah. So they were all fucked up on Whippets. Zombies looking like Dawn of the Dead, trying to get me and my man J.R. to come upstairs and smoke weed now. There's dead slaves around there, under the building?

Apparently. They've got a tomb, they said. You saw the tomb? Did you see a tomb they said. You saw the tomb? They say that's where the so-called skull and bone fraternity used to have their meetings at in this so-called... Could you imagine if we really found out that one of those really big Ivy

League institutions had a room in the basement where you'd go in and there's a fucking tomb and they had slaves. That's what he's saying. I know, I know. Let's not imagine it. Let's just say... So I'm saying, what I'm saying is, I know you did see it, but what I'm saying is, could you imagine if that's real? And it is.

Like, how, that doesn't even make sense. That is, wow. Skull and bone stuff, when you really, like, talk to the people that are experts on it, like, they form these bonds for life because of this creepy shit they do when they're young. Like, they do all this weird shit and dress up and have these little, like, have you ever seen, like, Bohemian Grove? You ever seen that shit? Yeah when they're young. Like, they do all this weird shit and dress up and have these little, like, have you ever seen, like, Bohemian Grove? You ever seen that shit?

Like, where they sacrifice? Yeah, man, the type of people, the type of people, no, Bohemian Grove. It's interesting to see how they would act. Bohemian Grove is a very, is a much, is a much smaller part of a larger story. The story is of the fact that Solomon, even though he had 700 wives and 500 concubines, in the Bible when you read it, it says he grows... Stop for a moment.

You know what I'm saying? Solomon's just running shit. 700 wives, 500 concubines. But the ill shit is, it discusses in the Bible about how in his old age, he became complacent. And when he was an old man, he's too old to start fucking all these broads,

they start running parts of what is supposed to be his kingdom and he allows them to have their own to practice their own religions and one of them was from the ammonites the ammonites one of his wives had a custom in which they would take this gigantic deity and they would fill holes and pockets within the deity with offerings to the god. And one of the last offerings was a human child, a newborn baby. And they had to put, like, wheat and an animal and a cornucopia or some shit and these special herbs. And then one of them was this.

And according to people, that is what takes place at Bohemian Grove, a mock sacrifice of a human child honoring a god that people from... Moloch, the hour god. Right, Moloch, whatever. Yeah, what the fuck? Yeah. Or he can be seen as a gigantic bull in some imagery. Where are these babies and people and the sacrifices coming from?

Nobody knows about it. Who are these parents that's letting people sacrifice their child? Well, I think the idea is that they would steal it. And the idea is also that if you would be willing to kill a baby, you're showing some really high-level craziness that you're willing to engage in so we can keep secrets with you. You're totally down for the cause. You're killing babies.

You're going to the extreme. But you're doing that in so many different societies. I remember when we talked about special Nazi training, I read an interesting story about how some of their officers in the SS, when they were trained, they were given a puppy for six months. And everyone knows if they ever had a puppy that's a month or two old, in six months, it looks really a lot bigger and different. And your job was to train the puppy and it grew up with you. And if you failed and the puppy died, you were gone. It was like your responsibility

was the dog. And on the day that you graduated, the last died, you were gone. It was like your responsibility was the dog. And on the day that you graduated, the last order that they were given was to take the dog out into the field and put a fucking bullet in its head. And they said they got this blueprint and idea from ancient Babylonian times when they had to choose gladiators to guard and be bodyguard for the king. They would give them a woman as they were gladiators. You can be bodyguard for the king. They would give them a woman as they were gladiators. You can have this woman for a year. At the end of the year, your last and final order when you're training to be a bodyguard is to kill the woman. Benches better be on their path.

Yeah, you might be sick of their shit by then. You're like, God damn, I can't wait to graduate. Not enough head. Not enough head. Oh, God. Y'all niggas are dead animals. Animals. Take a historical reference and make it into a fuck shack from Babylonian times.

I got to make it so that I can relate to it. Funny. Oh, that's the passage. Fuck shack gladiatorship. That's the passage from the Art of War where the emperor couldn't keep his concubines in order, so he hired this military guy to train them and he said step to the left they didn't step to the left he said step to the left

they didn't step to the left so he grabs the emperor's finest concubine his favorite one and cuts her fucking head off in front of everybody and he protests he says don't do it the emperor says don't do it he says no no in order for this to work you gotta listen to me whoomp chops her fucking head off and says no no in order for this to work. You got to listen to me

Chops her fucking head off and says any questions and they all step to the left If you're willing to do something Bobby obviously I please don't correct me I paraphrase the shit out of that story But the point would being that he did kill it and he killed he killed her rather and he killed her to send a message And I'm willing to do this I'm gonna take this to the worst fucking place possible right now for no reason just because you wouldn't step to where I tell you to step when I said yeah and that's the only way you can control giant groups of people like that you got to be completely fucking ruthless because if you're not they're gonna go why are you in charge because you shouldn't be in

charge that's some old stupid shit and it shouldn't have one person running things like that's crazy like this fucking charade of a presidency that we got going on. Has anybody more than Mitt Romney ever shown that he doesn't really have an opinion on anything unless you tell him what it is? Or that he's willing to change his opinion. Yeah, that's the craziest thing. He does that shit. It's hilarious. I, one of these people that, when people approach me about that, they're like, oh, well, what are you going to vote for Obama?

And I'm saying, look, I'm not saying that Obama is a perfect candidate, but I'd rather have. In other words, I'd rather not be told and have someone assume that just because I don't want Obama. And do you think that Mitt Romney of all people is the fucking answer? Because really voting for anybody else at this particular point. I mean, they say that Ron Paul is still in the race. And yet his own delegates at the RNC are being denied the ability to... It's become a fiasco.

Delegates are blocking in stuff. And at some point, you have to ask yourself a question. Where does his message inside the GOP actually hold weight? Like where is he going to have the ability to give that idea of conservation and not selling out to corporations and not making it a free-for-all in terms of the American military just intervening everywhere, expending all the resources that we have? That voice, I think, needs to be heard on the right.

And unfortunately, without Ron Paul, we don't have that. We have a nutcase over there that thinks it's logical to go to war with Iran, which I'm telling you is going to fling the entire area into fucking World War III. It's just insane. Somebody on TV said that if Obama gets reelected, there's going to be a civil war.

Really? I heard somebody say that shit. A lot of people, those Tea Party guys are saying that. Come on, man. You're going to lose. Eight minutes, sir. You're going to be a civil war. Really? I heard somebody say that shit. A lot of people, those Tea Party guys are saying that. Come on, man. You're going to lose. Eight minutes, bro. You're going to lose. Eight minutes.

Pull up Hyena's Mouth. Pull up a Google search of Hyena's Mouth. Yo, what is this? I got to show you this photo. Hyena's got his mouth open. What are these alien laptops I'm seeing? What are these? That's Alienware.

I want one. They're the shit, dude. Where do I get one of these? Alienware.com. I need one of these. They're gaming laptops. This motherfucker will play like any video game. This laptop They're the shit, dude. Where do I get one of these? Alienware.com. I need one of these. They're gaming laptops. This motherfucker will play like any video game. This laptop right here is bananas, B.

They got two of them. They lit up red. I love them. I'm in love with them. I want one. They're 18 inches. They're huge. But you don't want to carry them around.

They weigh a lot. Them shit slips. Pull up the image of Hyena's mouth. Just Hyena mouth in the first image. Or spotted Hyena mouth. First Google image. The fucking mouth on these things. They have the strongest bite.

Yeah, those are the ones that throw up on themselves to attract the primate. They're more closely related to felines than they are to dogs. One day when you have time, look it up. When his mating season, they puke on themselves, and they put it all over themselves. And felines are ruthless killers, yo. Cats are fucking murderers. They're bone crushers. Look at that fucking mouth.

That is craziness, man. They bone crush. They got a tight jaw. It just squeezes. See, and look at that tongue. Look at that tongue. That look like a cat tongue. That's a good blowjob mouth.

Oh, my God. No, it ain't. No, it ain't. No, it ain't. Eat your hips. Man, if you got a chick with teeth like that, you are not sticking your dick in her mouth. Don't do it. No matter how much she tells you, she won't bite it.

Don't trust that bitch. Don't trust her. Trust me, Jeeves. She don't bite it. Listen, man, this has been another fucking amazing podcast. A lot of fun, dude. And we didn't even cover half the shit I wanted to talk about, but we ran out of time. We got to do it again.

We could do these a hundred times a week. We could have these going every day. I just want to give a big shout out to everybody listening. You can hit me up at Immortal Tech on Twitter or ViperRecords.com or Facebook, Immortal Technique. Please definitely keep up with me.

Keep up with Joe Rogan's show. I'm going to definitely try and have Joe come out and host one of these battle events, go crazy. That should be fun. It would be insane. I got a headline.

Maybe we'll do it for my birth. Maybe we'll do it for my birth. Swayve, maybe we can entice some of these battle events go crazy. That shit would be fun. It would be insane. I got a headline. Maybe we'll do it for my birth. Maybe we'll do it for my birth. Swayve, maybe we can entice some of these battle rappers that think that they got their game on point to come out one last time for a little brawl fest. You know what I mean? Tell them how they can get in touch with you, Joe. At DJGI Joe on Twitter or DJGIJolive.com. I love talking shit.

If the audience loves talking shit, talk shit, let's go all day. I'm a wild motherfucker. I will offend you purposely. And that's it. At DJGIJO and DJGIJOLive.com. Holla. We're actually doing a battle rap

at the comedy store next week. Oh, really? Stop it. No, you're not. Right here. Here's the flyer. That is. Who's doing this? Is. Here's the flyer. That is. Who's doing this?

Who's doing this? Is he going to be there? They're using him on the front of that. Speed Weed, Naughty Show, Death Squad. Oh, Speed Weed is doing it? Does Eddie Murphy have anything to do with this? Eddie Murphy? Who's that picture up there?

I think that's Jamar Neighbors. Oh, shit. I thought you said it's Eddie Murphy. That's Eddie Murphy. Just like Eddie Murphy. With Lil Wayne body. That is. Lil it's Eddie Murphy. That's Eddie Murphy. Just like Eddie Murphy. With Lil Wayne body. That is. He makes you on Lil Wayne body.

You son of a bitch. You better stop using that poster. Did you make that poster? I didn't do any of this. Okay, whoever made that poster, you better cut the shit. That motherfucker's going to sue you. We had a couple of the comics on last night doing it, and I was blown out of my mind how great they were. It was great to see you guys go against comedy.

Save it. Amateur nonsense. How dare you bring that up in front of train killers. Add Sway7 on Twitter. Listen to this nonsense. Add Sway7 on Twitter. What is it again? Sway7 on Twitter.

Sway7? Yeah, Sway7. S-E-V-A-H. You've got to spell this, man. You're not going to get nearly enough Sway. S-W-A-V-E-S-E-V-A-H. You got to spell this, man. You're not going to get nearly enough Sway. S-W-A-V-E-S-E-V-A-H. I would have gone with S-U-A. Nah, that's Suave.

My name is family given. My father gave it to me, so I ain't messing it up. Beautiful. Beautiful. Well, listen, man, you guys have been awesome. This is a fun-ass fucking podcast. Thank you, Joe. I had a great time.

We talked about all kinds of silly shit. Randomness. We had a good time. Wild stuff. It was fun. It was everything I love in a podcast. Politics, nature, and you have delicious l I had a great time. We talked about all kinds of silly shit. Random wild stuff. It was fun. It was everything I love in a podcast. Politics, nature, and you have delicious lomo saltado to take. Delicious steak.

Thank you so much. And you got delicious weed that I'm about to get in your ear about. Yeah, holla. Listen, thank you, everybody. Thanks to Alienware for hooking us up with these cool-ass computers. Thanks to Onnit.com for sponsoring us and providing me with essential brain nutrients to keep my shell flowing at a high level and go and get yourself some kettlebells and battle ropes.

This Friday and Saturday, we got late night shows here at the Ice House. Me, Joey Diaz, and Ari Shafir. There's a rumor that Duncan Trussell's going to come down and apologize to Brian Redband. That's the rumor. I will not be here. Oh, you stop it, you silly bitch. Come in and take a hug from me. Stop it!

Buy a Death Squad shirt instead. Move on in this world. Move on in this world. Get that Death Squad shirt. Get that Revolution of Immortal Technique. Big shout out to Cary Stewart. ViperRecords.com. And The Martyr. Download The Martyr.

Download The Martyr where? At ViperRecords.com. Get at us at Red Band At Joe Rogan You know what I mean We take all comers Download that That works The Live By Sway

On Dapiv.com Mortal Technique man Thank you very much For having me Joe I'm always gonna come back Whenever I'm in LA I'm always gonna try

And come back I want you on Anytime you want to man I can't wait to come back And talk more shit I can't wait to have you We gotta come back And talk about the shit We ain't wait to have you back. We got to come back and talk about the shit

we ain't talk about. We can talk about everything. Yeah, definitely. You guys are awesome. Thank you very much. Thanks, everybody. We'll see you tomorrow with Brian Callen

and then Thursday with Mike Birbiglia. Holla! Thank you.