The Joe Rogan Experience - #295 - Tom Segura, Christina Pazsitzky

Episode Date: December 11, 2012

Joe sits down with Tom Segura and Christina Pazsitzky.

Joe Rogan experience. Train by day, Joe Rogan podcast by night. All day. That was one of our longest yet most enjoyable commercials. Fantastic. Because it wasn't, I mean, it wasn't, it wasn't. You know what I'm saying, man? I know what you're saying, John.

You with me, brother? A little bit of both is going on there. Tom Segura and Christina P. I got to give you guys world champion funniest couple. Yeah. Thanks, man. And the breaking of the mold of every entertainer with an entertainer is in a shit relationship. Sure.

You guys have totally fixed that. Yeah, thanks, man. Because it's always like the dude's funny and the chick is good looking and he writes jokes for her. It's like one of those. Or it's that the guy's funny and he takes the girl with him on the road. It's very rare that there's equals. Yeah, yeah. But you guys are both really funny and you really love each other.

You get along and it's like a weird situation. And hot. We're both hot. You're both hot as fuck. Hairy. That's a weird situation. It actually works. So lucky. Yeah, we get asked about it all the time. Yeah, we do.

You would think one of you guys would suck. It's usually one of you sucks. Right? Am I right? For sure. Oh, definitely. It's usually like you have to hang out with this guy's really annoying wife who's also a comedian or really annoying husband who's also a comedian. Oh, yeah. And she actually has less tolerance for it. When we go out with other couples, she's always like, don't leave me at the table with some boring fucking cunt while you go have fun with the guys.

Because here's why. while you go have fun okay guys here's why yeah when we hang out with other comics like it's usually dudes and then they have like you know wives that maybe not are as inspiring and i always want to hang out with the dudes and talk shit about comedy and i always get stuck swapping fucking recipes for apple brown betty i'm like i don't want to talk about clothes man like let's talk about some shit they defined you by your vagina. You got lumped into the wrong group. Oh, shit. Speaking of which, did you hear about this fucking 50-year-old guy who he had a sex change?

And now he's playing college basketball? What? No, I missed that one. He's playing college women's basketball. That's great. women's basketball. He's enormous. Wait, now, did he? This is another. I don't know about this.

Hold on. This is really. You just made me really think about this. Did he have college eligibility? Or did he already go to college as a man? And then since he switched sexes, he has new four years of eligibility to play? Because that would be so awesome if he did that way dude this thing this guy okay i'm probably a very sweet sweet person i shouldn't say thing right but this dude slash woman woman now let's say what did i say woman okay no the woman that

used to be a man let's call her a woman she is six foot six whoa wow she's not it's like a giant man and she's decided that she's a girl now okay so she has the sex change operation but she's still a six foot six man-bodied woman that's a big bitch so you that is like if you're i'm looking at all these little girls that are playing with her. Man, if your daughter was playing basketball with a dude that was pretending to be a woman or decided to become a woman, you can't. That's all fine and good for the real world if you want to define yourself as a woman. But when you enter into athletics, there's a reason why there is fucking different categories for men and women.

That shit's not fair. So it's not fair? You think it's an unfair advantage? Oh my god. It's an enormous man. That's crazy. The other thing is too is because the one thing that's hard I think when you're not involved in this but you see somebody let's say who gets

a sex change and I'm saying outside of sports right? Just in life. You go they're like hey you know I've decided to do this who gets a sex change, and I'm saying outside of sports, right, just in life. Right. You go, they're like, hey, you know, I've decided to do this. I'm a woman now. And you go, okay. You want to be like, fine, you're a woman now. But there's that part in my mind that always goes, yeah,

but when I look at your hands, even if you've had surgery and everything, those are still men's hands. Yeah. You know what I'm saying? Those are men's arms that you have and legs. Even if you have implants in and you change your whole face, that's still a guy's bicep in your arm. Yes. Even though you had a sex change.

So if you take that to sports, that's where it all counts. That's where your original biology. And it counts the other way as well because there was a guy who was a Muay Thai fighter. And he was really like a high-level fighter. And he decided to get a sex change. And then once he got a sex change, he literally got his balls cut off, stopped producing testosterone and started getting the fuck beat out of him. No shit. Really?

He was still fighting men. He was still fighting men but he didn't have balls anymore. So it's not exactly that this six-foot tall person that was a man and is now a woman is a woman. But it's not exactly that this six-foot-tall person that was a man and is now a woman is a woman. But it's not exactly that he's a man either. He's sort of in this weird limbo state. But he still has this unfair mechanical advantage. That's a giant person. He's got huge shoulders, huge hands.

If you're playing against a little girl, that's just stupid. Well, and it is like those athletes. If you're playing against a little girl, that's just stupid. Well, and it is like those athletes. Weren't they saying that the people that had prosthetic limbs, like the runners with those special, you know what I mean, those legs? Prosthetics. Yeah, that they were like, that's an unfair advantage. You're so lucky to be crippled. Well, the one guy made it in.

Well, I don't want to say that anybody would be lucky to be crippled. No, but they were saying that. But people were saying that. But I don't think they were really saying that. What they're really saying is, realistically, let's look at what's going on here. There's a mechanical advantage to those things that surpasses the human body.

These are springs. You're running on these crazy sprinting springs. Those things work like a motherfucker. So if they're really... It seems like they work better than legs. So that is different. Well, one thing that can't happen for sure with those on is you cannot tear your Achilles. Yeah.

It's like, literally, you don't have one. You can't tear your ACL if it's up to your quad. Yeah. Well, the whole thing is really, I mean, you would never want to say that there's anyone that has any sort of advantage to being handy. No, no, that's fine. You know what I'm saying? I mean, it's a sensitive issue. I mean, we're all very lucky that we're not.

Thank God. Of course. Of course. But when you do see, like, that you can run faster with that, like, at what point in time do you let that go? If the world record becomes a guy with robot legs, you know what I mean? Like, how do you define the athletics then? Like, that guy was in the Olympics this summer with prosthetics.etics remember that yes the the sprinter was he south african

i don't know i forget where he was from i think he was but he um it was cool to see him in the event he didn't he didn't win or medal which made it less of an issue no you know people didn't press it but they were pressing it before he got in everybody was people were saying are that south african runner remember when we were in South Africa? Was she, she was both genders or something? And everyone was upset about her? No, well, that was, people were accusing her of being a hermaphrodite. And they put her through this.

Oh, yeah, that's right. Was she at the end of the day? No, she's a woman. But she was put through, like, really brutal, horrendous scrutiny. Yeah, yeah. And people were awful to her. And she definitely is a woman, 100%? I'm almost certain.

I forget. I just forgot her name. I blanked on her name too. But she is South African. And yeah, in the country, they adore her because she was so – Yeah, because people really were horrible to her during the scrutiny. Right, right, right. Yeah, but I'm fairly certain she's legitimately.

You know, though, I mean, if you go through the trouble of cutting your peener off and doing all that, like, just let the girl play basketball. But that's not her. The problem is it's not let her play basketball. It's let her play basketball with little girls. What school does this? There's all these little girls that are playing. They're like, they just went to college. They 18 this is a 50 year old man that one's bananas

that one is crazy okay that shit is bananas what school is he is this uh let me see here um poor guy poor yes you're right you're right absolutely yeah you know god bless him yeah his whole life he just wanted to be on the ladies' team. Yes. And now it's happening. Yes, sort of, but it's not fair. I mean, it's just not. Life's never fair.

The problem is once you start having competitive athletics. Right. It's like with any other thing in life, do whatever you want to do. If you want to go to work with a dress, if you're nice, I'll talk to you. Of course. I don't need you to dress like a man. Whatever your fucking thing is, if you're nice, I don you're nice i'll talk to you i don't i don't need you to dress like a man if you you know whatever your fucking thing is if you're nice i don't care i'll talk to you but you have to recognize the mechanical advantages to the male frame of course i mean the tendon strength i mean even when there's a depletion of i agree testosterone and your body

sort of shrivels up a little bit and you lose muscle mass sure it's still a goddamn man yeah and the overwhelming evidence is if you look at men's first if you line up men's and women's results for athletic competition there's a there's a there's a reason why every single one basically the men are more advanced and they're they run faster they jump higher but then you guys are going to get like the anomalies like every now and then there is a woman that can do as many push-ups as the male Marines or whatever the woman is. No, it's not. Aren't there Marines?

Don't they have the same athletic standards in the Marine Corps? But you might get a group of weak guys, one really strong girl, but if you have all the athletes. The strongest guys. If you have just the strongest guys and the strongest girls, the strongest guys. The strongest guys will always be physically stronger. There are fucking freaks out there.

Oh, yeah. I've seen some of these guys in the UFC that fight three, four, five rounds and don't even get fucking tired. Wow. What kind of incredible shape some of those fucking guys are in.

Amazing. That's like some high-level shit. And at that level, those men, those really high-level men, there's nothing like that that women can't really keep up with that oh yeah you know and that's one of the the big accusations against this one woman who is like one of the uh top women in the world she was uh stripped of her

tire her name is cyborg and she's built like she's built like a strong dude. Like, Brian, can you pull up a picture? Pull up a picture of cyborg muscular dude. Wait till you see how scary this chick is. I love it. And she fought this other chick, Gina Carano. And Gina Carano was a beautiful son of a, I guess her dad's like a famous football player. Yeah.

You know, beautiful, smart, tough chick. And this Brazilian bitch just ragdolled her. Really? It was horrific. It was a vicious, vicious beating. Yeah. But everybody accuses her of doing steroids. Doesn't everybody though?

So then she got caught. She did get caught. And she got caught. She tested hot. And when she tested hot, everybody was like, duh. Like, I don't know. That's one picture of her. There's some other pictures of her, Brian,

while she's celebrating in the cage. Because that's her at a weigh-in. And there's a difference between you at a weigh-in and you when you're actually fighting. Because when you're actually fighting, that's when your muscles pump up with blood. Like that one on the far right.

You see her, Brian? Right here? Yeah, right there. Oh, my gosh. Right there. She looks like Kate from Lost mixed with the Swedish. Are you kidding me? Grandma.

Anyway. She's built like Leron Landry. She's a very, very muscular woman. Jesus. She's a tank. And she's scary talented very muscular woman jesus she's a tank and she's scary talented like as a striker she's really she's for a woman she is fucking vicious yeah i believe it it's so okay and as feminist as i totally am i there's some part of me that i look at her and you're like why why sweet well because she wants to go to war and i like that and i respect that because i too am an

angry fucking yeah but at the same time you're like like, oh, I just want to protect her. I don't want her to get her face hit. Oh, she came up with the craziest camp in Brazil. There she is. She came up with the Shoot the Bucks. Shoot the Bucks. And Shoot the Bucks camp is all these badass Brazilian Muay Thai guys. They're fucking animals.

And she was married to the other dude, Cyborg Evangelista. And he's a fucking beast too. He's an old school MMA legend. So the two of them were just like the scariest couple ever. Are they breeding super babies? I don't think they're together anymore. Jesus. But yeah, she is a terrifying woman.

Did you, by the way, did you get, I told you I got to see a little bit of the fights this weekend when I was in the hotel. I was in Calgary. And I saw you on, and then when Brown beat Swick, it was, right? Yeah. Which was, yeah, he was, there was some great, that was mostly a ground game fight if I remember right? No, I don't think they went to the, well, they went to the ground. He got him in a darts and then he almost got him, I think he almost got him in a triangle and a darts.

I thought Brown almost had him. Yeah, in the first round, right? The first round and then the second round he stopped him. Is that what happened or did they stop him at the end of the first round? Was it the first round? I think it was. No, I don't remember. Whatever.

I don't remember when exactly it happened. But my God. And then he knocked him. What a sensational knockout. Yeah, yeah. Great knockout. But afterwards, did you know or did you see, did he tell you when Brown was waiting for you? Like what aired on Fox was that he was standing there and he was looking around.

He was like, hey, Joe. Joe. Like this. He was like, what's up, man? And then it cut to commercial. looking around he was like hey joe joe like this he was like what's up man yeah and i cut to commercial well he even said that to me like he looked over at me it was totally not my call i didn't assume when when if you see me in the cage or or or uh or not it's like it's not my call they tell me we want an interview or they tell me there's no time for an interview. And a lot of times they say there's no time. And when you do a card like the Fox card, like I think they were already worried about time. And it turned out to be a good worry because the fight, I believe, started after it was supposed to end.

So like for people that set their DVRs, like they didn't even get the fight. A lot of people didn't get the fight apparently. Oh, no. Yeah. Oh, no. Yeah, oh, no. So that's why. They were behind the time. I don't understand how they produce a show like that. I don't really even go in the truck and peek.

I don't know what the fuck they're doing. But I know that when you have live fights, it's really difficult to judge how much actual time you have. like live fights it's really difficult to judge how much actual time you have right could be like three first-round knockouts or it could be three really long decisions where or it could be three decisions where a guy gets kicked in the balls you have to stop the time for five minutes like yeah sometimes shit can drag on past where you think it's gonna be so they err on the side of caution and they cut out interviews when they can yeah well you got to have much tighter time restrictions on a network like fox than like a normal you know obviously a pay-per-view

or even like a cable thing because that's like hard out and ends for other shows that you can't go late into right yeah i guess it is you should just get walkie-talkies between yeah that probably solve everything walkie-talkies who Hey, the next fight's on. Come on out, you know? Who's talking to you? No, no, you don't. I don't think you know what you're talking about, silly bitch. They should hire you as a consultant.

Talk about misunderstanding. You should produce these shows. That's a good idea. What we're saying is if communication's a problem. Why don't you go into your next production meeting and be like, I'm just going to bring him, and he's going to talk for me from now on. Guys, walkie-talkies. Can we talk about the guys getting kicked in the balls?

Don't they have something to protect their means? Yeah, they do. They do, but a lot of guys, they wear the wrong cups. If you just wear a regular jockstrap, those things move around. They're designed for sports. They're really not designed for dudes kicking you in the dick yeah the things that you need when someone's kicking you in the dick you need some more comprehensive approach yeah you can't be set on for that softball bullshit cup because those kicks are hard as fuck. Inside leg kicks to the dick are one of the most painful things ever.

They're so horrible. You think – oh, the Muay Thai kick? Is that what you're talking about? I've been kicked in the balls so many times. For real. Because I've had – I've probably been kicked in the balls at least 100 times in my life. Really?

Really hard. It's amazing that you can get through those. I mean, because I think about – Wear a cup, yeah. Oh, but always with a cup on. Yeah. Okay. Well, I don't think I've ever been kicked without a cup.

Thank God. Oh, my gosh. Well, there's videos about that. Yeah. The cup protects you a little bit. The cup protects you a little bit. It keeps them from rupturing, I think is what it does. Oh, rupture.

They can rupture. Oh, yeah. Guys have lost testicles because they were sparring and they got kicked and they didn't have a cup on. What about when those people get the high heels and the balls? Yes. Fetish videos? How does that shit just not burst open? I've got to send you.

I don't know. You've played the one before. I got that. There's a video. That shit's frightening. There's some that are clearly faked. You know, the kick. You can be like, oh, they've got a cup on or whatever. Oh, my God. But then I have one. I don't get that. That shit's frightening. There's some that are clearly faked. You know, the kick. Like, you can be like, oh, they've got a cup on or whatever.

Oh, my God. But then I have one. I'll send it to you. Where it starts, she's kicking him really hard. In Spanish, right? And he's got underwear on. Yeah, it's in Spanish. And then she's just like, suffer, suffer.

I want you to suffer. And you're like, all right, but maybe he has a cup on. And then she takes the underwear off. And she fucking, she's like punting a football, kicking him. Oh, my God. Like, bam! With heels on. With heels on.

With heels, yeah. His knees are shaking, and he starts to bleed. He starts bleeding. Oh, my God. And he's just taking it like – He likes it, right? He loves it. And then she squeezes them when they're bleeding.

Yeah, so hard. And goes, sangria! What is she saying in Spanish? No! You bleed, you bleed! Yes. Oh, my God. She just smacks them. So unnecessary. I know. Yeah, so hard and go Unnecessary no tell her to stop the one I saw is she was taking the heel and she was grinding it like a cigarette butt Running it into this concrete. That's what she was doing his balls with high heels on. What is it? How could someone want that? I don't know. What is the switch that goes wrong in your brain?

I don't think. Well, you want someone to hurt you. I hate these dirty balls. I hate them. That's what it's probably going to be. Make me do bad things. I don't think they can even want it. I don't think they even want it.

You don't think they want it, but they do it. I think something leads them to discover, not that they want it, but they're like, oh, my reaction to that is not what most people go through, they're like, oh, my reaction to that is not what most people go through, which is like, God, that's the worst thing ever. All of a sudden, they get that, and something happens inside where it's like, they get a rush, some type of adrenaline, and then they're like,

oh, wow, there's a pleasure to that, too. It's a power thing. Isn't it an S&M thing? It's being submissive. Are you watching one right now? I'm scared. It's a power thing. Isn't it an S&M thing? It's being submissive. Are you watching one right now? No, I'm scared. You guys got me scared. It's relinquishing your power.

I don't think you're allowed to show this. You can't show balls, dude. No, it's blurred out. Is it really? For real? He has it spread out like it looks like a frog on a table. Brad over at Ustream is our friend. I'm just kidding. This is a high heel commercial.

You ever listen to Dan Savage? He has the Savage Love podcast. He's a sex columnist. And he says that those fetishes come from your childhood. Like let's say if you got a fetish for raincoats when you were a little kid, you associated some pleasure with your raincoat, right? Like you'd rub against it and maybe that gave you a boner. And then later in life, that's what you associate

your sexual needs with. Dude, that's what we have like a latex kind of thing. Right, so maybe this kid got kicked in the balls when he was like a little boy by like a little girl that he liked or something.

I don't know. And he got a boner. Whoa, how many dudes have gotten kicked in the balls by girls they liked to the point where it became a thing? There you go.

There you go. How is it possible? How is it possible that so many dudes became turned on by that idea of getting their tits? That's every fetish guy, model guy's story. When I was four, I got kicked in the balls by Molly. That bitch turned me. Turned me like a werewolf, and I became a ball kick fetishist.

Holy shit, that's got to hurt. I don't understand it. It's so painful. I can't understand it. It's so painful. I can't imagine that anybody would want it. Well, I always feel so tentative handling Tommy's nuts. That's so nice. They're so gentle and sweet, and the thought of hurting

them. And I ask for a little more. I could give him a little tug, give him a little something. Did you know that the size of a man's testicles, the size of a human's testicles, is proportionate a human's testicles is proportionate to the promiscuity of the women in his surrounding area? Wow. What? With all primates, the size of the testicles rises and falls depending on how big a hooker the girls in your neighborhood are. My dad must have been around some real sluts then. He had some giant balls.

My dad's balls were huge. I was talking about last night. I was like, I saw him. I went into his room and he was like, I think he was putting on underwear. So from behind I go, Jesus Christ, man. And he was like, you got like donkey nuts. He's like, alright, Tommy.

Knock it off. It was the biggest balls I've ever seen. So he must have been around some real whores. That's interesting. Well, it's probably his, not necessarily him, but the generations before him that made him. It's like it becomes a genetic thing, and it all comes from being around more promiscuous women. Loose brides.

Yeah, that's why chimps have the biggest balls. Chimps have enormous balls. Their dicks aren't even as big as ours. Because female chimps are down to fuck. But their balls are way bigger. Their balls are so big. Yeah. Chimps are down to fuck all day.

They're DTF. What's the other monkey? Bonobos. Bonobos, yeah. They're an actual cousin of the chimp. It's a separate type of chimp. Oh, yeah. They don't just masturbate.

They do everything except mother and son. Really? Yeah, mother and son is the only thing they don't do. Wow. Yeah. And we were talking about that on the podcast. Someone had speculated that might because they had figured out that there was like bad things happened to the baby when the mother had sex with the son. Oh, they like figured it out basically.

Maybe, but the problem with that is they're fucking all day. They're fucking everybody. Right. And they would have to like really be sure. Isn't it to kind of they use sex as a social tool to smooth over differences? Yeah. That's amazing. Homosexual sex.

Yeah. So great. Dude on dude shit. They just fuck each other. They go crazy. And they're very rarely violent with each other. It's really fascinating. Because of that, you think?

Yeah, for sure. Definitely. But it's amazing how that evolved. How does that evolve? It's incredible. It's weird. How do you get to a point where you've got this weird society of loving chimps that just fuck all the time? And then we look at them like they're sick.

Right. They're the only primates that we know of that don't kill each other or don't kill each other a lot there's probably some aberrations even in the bonobo world where some shit goes down someone's got to regulate some bonobos dicks don't work

now I heard somewhere that before we had traditional marriage that it actually made sense for the woman to bang as many dudes in the village so that the paternity of her children was unknown and she would actually have more men to protect the offspring. Like that to me would make sense if I had all of you guys, right? Tommy, Red Band, Joe, and that guy all doing me. And then I make a baby. Whose baby is it? I don't know. But Jorgen's going to defend it and you.

We all have to take care of it. It's going to be my baby. They become community babies. If you guys want to set that up. McKenna. Terrence McKenna always. My shit sinks to the bottom. Terrence McKenna always thought that in our distant history

that it's likely that we had these polygamous groups of people that like did psychedelic drugs together like his idea of like the long forgotten paradise was like these you know back where he believed like you know civilization was first being created he believes that those civilizations that came up they were all just eating mushrooms tripping their balls off and fucking each other. Right, yeah. And then Club Med came. That took a long time. I think your timeline might be a little bit off.

Sounds like a fun time. McKenna's world. But this idea was that at one time there was enough people doing ego-suppressing things, like eating mushrooms. It's all like really speculative there's the the idea of trying to figure out how many different cultures were doing psychedelic drugs when they came up with their religion when they came up with a lot of their ideas about life

and and you know studying the cosmos like a lot of those cultures that really got heavily into that stuff were also really heavily into psychedelic drugs. Like the Mayans, like making their crazy fucking calendars. The Mayans did a lot of mushrooms, man. I didn't know that. Oh, yeah. They ate mushrooms and raw chocolate together. There's some plant that had like an LSD-like effect.

They also took this. I don't remember what it was, but I went on a tour of Chichen Itza with this guy who was a professor. And it was really cool. Like you could hire him as a guide. And he was so knowledgeable, man. It was just really interesting. You know, him talking about all the different traditions

and why this was created and that was created. But he took me to this room. He's like, this is where they did their rituals. They were taking some sort of a psychedelic plant that had an LSD-like effect. This was just like a culture of super-duper trippers. Yeah. Yeah.

Well, when you see what they built, you're like, you could not have been of sound mind when you came up with this shit. It's not logical. Not at all. Well, they got to some weird places, weirder than anybody, where they fucking killed people so often

that they had spots. Like, we're going to kill them right here. This is the altar. They had altars where they would sacrifice people. Sure. I saw one. Not in Mexico. In Peru, I went to Machu Picchu a couple times and they had the sacrificial room.

They showed you they were on this table. People would voluntarily be sacrificed. But what's the utility socially? That you have to be high as fuck for, I think. But is that the point to satisfy the gods? Yeah. You take a virgin or you take the strongest guy or whatever? When the Aztecs, when they killed 80,000 people, some insane number of people over like just a period of four days. Apparently, it's disputed whether or not they killed 80,000 or whether it was only really 10,000 people exaggerated. There's some dispute as to how many people were actually killed.

But the number they believe is 80,000. That's incredible. and this was in 1487 the Aztec king when they completed one of their pyramids he killed every prisoner that like was part of the construction that sucks they fucking built this shit for him

what a dick and then he kills some insane amount of people over the course of four days. I bet that's a lot of voluntarily dying, too. I don't know. I think so. This is so crazy that, like, Duncan told me about this first, and then I read it, and I couldn't believe it. And then I told a bunch of different people. I go, did you know that this happened?

And I've had people go, fuck it did. No, it didn't. Like totally incredulous, walked away from me. I better send them emails. When I'm on that hunting show with Steve Rinella, great guy, man. Really, but really intelligent guy. Very well-read guy. And I told him about it.

He didn't believe it either. He's like, there's no way. I'm like, I'm telling you. Very well-read guy. And I told him about it. He didn't believe it either. He's like, there's no way. I'm like, I'm telling you. I'll send you the thing. When you send someone the actual, you know, different stories and depictions of this time in the 1400s, and you see that number, 80,000. Can you even wrap your head around it? No.

That's huge. They're not doing this with guns, folks. Okay? Wrap your head around 80,000 people getting cut to death. Fucking the Rose Bowl. In Florida. Fucking slaughtered. It's crazy.

It's the Rose Bowl. You're right. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. It is. Everybody there has their throat slit and their heart pulled out of their chest. Dude. It's nuts.

What a crazy motherfucker. Yeah. That's nuts. What a crazy motherfucker. Yeah, that's insane. Yeah, they took shit to the next level. Again, massive mushroom eaters. Yeah. Trippers. Big time trippers. It's weird when you combine a lot of the interesting things about those cultures,

a lot of the interesting things about those cultures, a lot of the interesting discoveries. There's very strange use of like an hieroglyphic-like language that it took us a long time to figure out. Like they still work on some of the different, more complex character things in order and debate like what exactly it means. Like there is a great documentary, I think it's from Nat Geo, called Decoding Maya believe that's what it's called and it's really

interesting to see these guys these scholars trying to figure out what the fuck this was yeah it's crazy language well the the other thing that blows your mind every time if you see something mine Azte or the Incans, is when you see what they built, you can take today's greatest architect and be like, how would you do this here? And they don't even know where to start. Like how these things were built, perfectly constructed, and stones that weigh like 20 tons are laid on top of another stone and fits into it. They have theories.

Like, well, we think that they would pour water down here. And then you're like, how many people would it take to move this? And they're like, oh, like 8,000. And then we'd probably put it over here. You're like, none of it makes sense. Anybody that, like, there's people that will try to debunk anything. Yeah. And any time you bring up anything that seems even remotely paranormal, like ghosts or fucking aliens, anything even remotely paranormal,

they automatically try to go, fuck, there's no evidence for that. That's all well and good until you get to giant stones. And there's something about moving giant stones. I'm like, listen, man, you've got to explain that. You've got to explain that yes you gotta explain that you can't just say oh well they did that and uh you know they they figured it out and they cut it out of this quarry right here look we have one there's one of my favorite pieces of evidence is

they show this one um one of these giant fucking big stone pillars they were carving out of this one giant piece of granite, and they stopped in the middle of the carving. But because of the fact that it was partially completed, you could see the method of shaping it. It was really kind of interesting. They learned a lot from that. So they believed that they did it with stones, and they believed that they did it slowly,

like it was a real painstaking process of slowly chipping away to get these but how the fuck did they move it? You gotta tell me how they moved it. There's no cranes, there's no bulldozers. We have to assume that they had some incredible knowledge of leverage and moving things

and they figured out how to get things under it and leverage it and move it somehow. But to pretend that that's not a mystery is really kind of disingenuous. Yeah, it is. But don't you – I find that – I mean also too human thinking changes over time. And since the Enlightenment period and like the scientific revolution, we've discredited anything that's remotely ooky and mysterious. Well, that's because there's so much ooky, mysterious stuff that's bullshit.

It's such a problem. There's so much bullshit out there, whether it's ghost bullshit or UFO bullshit. There's so many nutty motherfuckers with fake Bigfoot stories that are just muddying up the waters. There's so much bullshit.

Of course, a smart person is going to gravitate towards the scientific and more likely explanation for almost everything. That's very true. But it's not explaining everything. But it's not. Science cannot. It's leaving things that are valid, not the bullshit story, but it's leaving the real thing also like unexplored or unexplained and and people just go like nah whatever well what science can't figure out is emotions and artwork and why do we like beautiful things and why why do i love hearing

certain songs why has it changed the way my body feels you know what does it feel like to to kiss somebody that you love is that really just a bunch of chemicals that's floating around in your brain? What is going on there? Can science measure that? The emotional human aspect of life is the one thing that science can't really truly define

yet. But who knows, man? We might be able to break it down one day to ones and zeros and you just program the right ones and zeros in your head and you're happy all the time. Let's do it. Let's keep dreaming, man. Dream all day. Have you ever talked to someone who has a problem with normal consciousness, and they need something like an SSRI or something like that?

And then when they take it, they talk about how they finally can see life. We're going to be able to engineer that in people. Yeah. I mean, I guess we're doing it right now by engineer that in people. Yeah, that's true. I mean, I guess we're doing it right now by people taking pills. The chemicals you're saying? Yeah. Just the meat and the cheese of it. Well, the levels of certain things that make your consciousness operate,

certain things like serotonin and dopamine, like the levels of these things, like how these things are produced. They're going to be able to manipulate that shit. Oh, yeah. And they're going to be able to manipulate your mood. Oh, yeah. And they're going to be able to manipulate your mood. You're going to be way happier. You're also going to be able to program or they'll be able to program the genes that are more desirable and leave out things that are not. Yeah, dude.

Well, that's one of the things I always felt. I always felt like if you look at those, the standard image of the alien, you know, the gray eyed, the big gray skin, big eyed alien, they're like real flimsy bodies, big, big giant heads. If you look at them and you look at us and you look at a gorilla, they look more like us than the gorilla. Okay. They do. Right.

Right. Yeah. Like that might be what we're going to do. We're going to get, get rid of all the whole sex organ thing. And just design it. Right. Right? Yeah. Like that might be what we're going to do. We're going to get rid of all the whole sex organ thing. And just design a bunch of. Yeah. We're going to design these like bulletproof bodies that can see through walls. And we're just going to take that on.

Big heads. And then we're going to reproduce. They're going to be able to figure out a way to manipulate your genetics. And there's never going to be a dumb kid born again. Sure. That would be great. we'll develop a new language too dumb people and your fucking kid's going to be five going hey stupid why are you doing this fucking super genetic freak kid at five you already know there's three languages we'll stop speaking english at this point or any we'll have a new language and that'll mean everything well no we'll just communicate with our consciousness.

Oh, right. We don't even have to speak anymore. I wonder how much different the world would be if we all had the same language. I know. It makes a huge difference. I wonder how much, you know, confusion when it comes to, like, especially, like, with things, like, that are going on. Excuse me.

Things that are going on in the Middle East. Yeah. You know? I don't speak Israeli. I don't speak Israeli. I don't speak Hebrew. I don't know what the Palestinians are saying. I don't know what the Saudis are saying. I don't know what the Iranians are saying.

I can't even hear that. I don't understand it. So we're reliant on some, like have you ever seen like some of the translations that were attributed to Ahmadinejad? Is that his name? The Iranian? Ahmadinejad. Ahmadinejad. Is that his name? Akhmedinejad.

People take things out of context that he said and make it much more inflammatory. He says plenty of inflammatory shit, but they manipulate things. We don't know about that. We don't know about that unless you really go and look. If he talked English, we would know.

Motherfucker learns from English. about that unless you really go and look and if he talked english we would know oh yeah motherfucker learn some english yeah it's very true right now iranians and fucking listen to this podcast like bitch i thought you were cool yeah here's the thing too is that kidding folks it always universal language we should learn farsi there you go universal language it always blows my mind too because it brings to the point when people say the word fluent, when they say they're fluent in another language, and you realize what it really means to be fluent. Because people can speak a lot of a language and still miss tons of things, misunderstand things, and definitely not – like I speak pretty damn good Spanish from growing up in a Spanish-speaking household. Like I speak pretty damn good Spanish from growing up in a Spanish-speaking household. And I've seen – I've watched like court shows where they have an interpreter for somebody. And I've been like, that's not what he said.

And like the person said it, you know, like that. I've watched translations like UN things where you'll be like, oh, that person speaks, let's say, fluent Spanish. And you think – you're like, like no they speak great english too but it's actually like they speak 90 good english and can miss a word and intention that it can be shuffled around and like when you miss and when you misunderstand something by a word or i'll have it you know in spanish we're all like you you think i'm pretty much on point but you miss just a little thing a little detail that you don't miss when it's either your native language or you're so immersed in a language that you truly are fluent in it.

Right. You're thinking while you're talking. Right. Oh, yeah. And, like, you know, I mean, if you live in a country where – if you live in your second language country, you can, over time, I think, really speak tremendous – whatever that language might be. You know what I mean? Like, once you – when you tremendous, whatever that language might be. You know what I mean? When you're surrounded by that language 24-7. But short of that, you really do miss things. You do.

And I'm saying that's also what leads to misunderstandings, lead to argument, leads to confrontation and violence sometimes because you've misunderstood something. It wasn't even a disagreement. You just didn't say it right or understand it right. Yeah. Apparently, there's a new app, and you can talk to it, and if you're talking in whatever language, it translates it back to you in real time in English.

Wow. Yeah. Do you know what I'm talking about, Brian? No, I have no idea. Yeah, have you heard of this? No. God damn it, I have to find about this. I have to Google search it now because somebody told me about it and I haven't looked into

it, but this is apparently something either they're working on and it's going to be released soon or it's out now. and it's going to be released soon or it's out now? Because there is, like with my parents who are Hungarian speakers, and I can understand stuff. But even when I speak to my father in English, right, like he has a whole different understanding of English. Yeah, of course.

As I do in a different context. Like when he speaks Hungarian, I still don't really understand because of the different time and space that we grew up learning a language in. Like even generational between your father who is American. Like you didn't grow up with the same TV shows that you did or know the same references. It's almost impossible. You can misunderstand each other even then. Yeah, this is a real thing, okay? It's an app that translates languages during real-time phone calls.

Wow. So you can call someone and you can be talking to someone in real fucking time, whatever they say in French or Spanish. And it translates it to you. It translates it to you in real time. Wow. Wow.

That's incredible. That's nuts. Dude, we should try it. I know. Yeah, we should. But we don't know any other languages, so we wouldn't know what the fuck. I could call a Japanese girl. No, you don't know any other languages. So we wouldn't know what the fuck. I can call it Japanese, girl.

No, you don't know shit. Dude, have you ever been to... This is a Kings of Taiwan website. Did you see that tweet I did today? No, no. What is it? It's Kings of Taiwan. I was on Amazon last night looking up books.

And it said like where it says recommends to you. And one was recommends to you uh tai taiwan hookers and it was a kindle book and so i was like what the fuck is this book and i started reading through it and then i was like oh wait this is from a website somebody just took it and made it a book on amazon so then i started going on this website and the next thing i know i'm looking deep in this like report of how to get hookers in taiwan and how there's like it's accepted there and how like it is so interesting but theners in taiwan and how there's like it's accepted there and how like it is so interesting but then i found myself like on orbits like how expensive

is it going to go to taiwan like what am i doing you were thinking about going to taiwan i was lost dude i was lost on sometimes you just get lost on that barrel on the internet yeah we just not really just keep on going fall down that hole. You were thinking about actually going to Taiwan? Well, it looked really nice. I was looking at videos on YouTube, and it looked really pretty there and stuff. Dude, they'll put you in prison. People were saying it's better than Vegas. It's way better than Vegas.

But don't they put you in prison just for smoking pot there? No, no. You just don't do drugs or anything. You follow the rules. They have articles on that website about all the laws there and what to do, where to stay, and what soapies to get. The soapies. Who has the youngest. That would be dangerous.

What's a soapy? A soapy. So you guys never been to Taiwan? Not yet. No. We're planning on going for the Vegas experience pretty soon. For the better than Vegas experience. What experience?

It's just really hard to get people to leave the country. Yeah. Especially now. Yeah. You know, like, but if you're looking for a place with really good hookers. Do it, man. Yeah. I mean, not for the hookers.

We're not the world champs. And report back to us. Yeah, by no means. I meant more just for the nightlife. It seems like if they, you know, it just seems crazy there. Yeah, we just. Who sang that song? I love the nightlife.

I love to boogie. I love to go ride. Who sang that song? I love the nightlife I love to boogie I love to go around Who sang that? We just had Yoshi on our show Talk about a man who's seen too much He believes in strictly the hooker experience Oh, poor Yoshi Yoshi is our friend

He said Frankfurt is great And so is Amsterdam Frankfurt? Is that in Germany? That is Yoshi is a stand- He said Frankfurt is great, and so is Amsterdam. Frankfurt? Is that in Germany? That is. Yoshi is a stand-up comedian friend of ours who always worked for porn companies. So we would be at the comedy store, and Yoshi would roll up with a box of DVDs. I was always giving you, oh, Asian Sensation, check it.

Oh, yeah. No, no, no. Take your DVD. I think we had a box of- Thanks for giving me stuff to beat off to. Actually yeah actually we did for a long part of my collection was it was secondhand Yoshi right it was DVDs that Yoshi had given people that that's all yeah that fetish stuff is strange as fuck like dudes like jerk off on girls feet yeah weirdness Oh yeah. There's a lot of that. All that weirdness.

My favorite was specs appeal. Oh yeah. Which is just girls in glasses. In glasses. And guys were like, here it goes. And all over the glasses. And she's like, oh, you got on my glasses. I can't.

I'll try to go back to reading now. And then they would always try to read their next sentence. My friend got a, she does bondage stuff and she just got a letter the other day that was like, hey, I want to be your gimp. I just can't – I have to wear a mask, but you can peel off pieces of my arm and eat it if you want to. You can do anything you want to. Who? What? Is this a person that you know? She said that to you?

No, no. Somebody wrote a letter, an email to this person I know. Oh. Okay. And it was like the most – and he attached a photo, and it's so horrible to look at. You look at it and go, wow, that's a serial killer right there. That guy right there is a serial killer. You know what they say about people that have this thing where they're always hurting themselves?

You know, like they cut themselves. Some people have crazy genital piercings and shit like that. They think that some people that do really freaky shit might have a problem where they're not experiencing pain the right way. Oh, that's interesting. Really? Yeah. And it leads them to more and more extreme things

to really jolt themselves and feel it. Yeah. Well, some people clearly don't have the same pain threshold that I would say the majority of people have. You see some people do things and you're like, how the fuck did that not hurt you more than anything? You know that guy that got fucked to death by the horse?

Yeah. That guy had piercings all over his balls. His balls were like a three ring binder. I'm not joking so like this guy was just he was a straight up lokester it wasn't just getting horses to fuck him in the ass he was like running metal through his ball bag horses he's horses crazy

that horse fucked him to death yeah the craziest I remember that. The craziest thing, too, about the horse fucking and being into that is the horse dick is second to the horse thrust. Because an animal thrust, like a thrust from a horse is impossible. You can't. You could line up eight people and be like, don't let them push. And that horse is fucking through you. Yeah, man. All they eat is grass too what the fuck yeah can you imagine if grass is a solution to everything healthy as fuck and just run for

a hundred miles yeah horses just eat grass and they're yoked yeah it's crazy diet right they're so swole i mean is there any animal more swole than a horse I was about to say They're like thoroughbreds And then I remembered They are They are thoroughbreds Like A thoroughbred horse

Like there's no animal In the animal kingdom That is more like Yoked Yeah And they're fucking beautiful Yeah When you see them

You're like That looks like a majestic Yeah it's a majestic animal The fact you can actually Ride it and get it to do shit I am And with you on it's back It's like, how's 35 miles an hour sound? You know what I mean?

I don't fuck with horses. The real problem, though, is the people that want to do those jumping things and all that other kind of crazy shit with the horses. Like those sports, equestrian sports. People die during those things. That's how Christopher Reeve got fucked up. And the horses get fucked up a lot, too. don't get that no i just feel like you know that's a scary proposition right there you're you're planning on this animal listening to you what if it pulls a muscle yeah are you ready for that i'm out that shit's if you understand like bodies you know

that animals they strain things they break legs they twist ankles yeah shit goes wrong if shit's going wrong while that animal does that, you're attached to that fucking thing and it's going to spike you into the ground with all of its weight on top of you. Dude, fuck riding a horse. Fuck riding a horse. I got bucked once. I would never go back. Give me virtual knuckles, girl. I'm with you.

Fuck that. I think they're beautiful and I wouldn't mind riding a horse like a trail horse and stuff like that as long as it's a cool horse that some guy had had and took care of. You know that this is an easygoing horse. It's always been loved and treated with respect. The older one who's been hanging out for 70 years.

I'm totally down with that, but the real problem is these fucking equestrian events. We've got them jumping over shit. Well, not only that. To me, it's not respect for this beautiful, magnificent beast. I mean, fuck you. Sort of. It is kind of cool to watch him jump.

It is. But I mean, have respect. Like you said, this animal also has a mind of its own. How do you know what it's going to do? It's tardy. How do you know it wants to do that bullshit? Yeah. I think it wants to do that.

It doesn't want to do that bullshit. Yeah. You don't want someone on your back. Especially because the animal can clearly see that there's nothing to the left of these fucking boards and nothing to the right. It's like, why am I jumping when I can just go to the left? And I've seen that. I've seen footage of that before where the horse goes like. The horse is like, stop, stupid.

Why am I jumping this, man? What am I, your fucking trained monkey? We got options, man. We got options. I'm going around. This is fucking stupid. Why should I jump? You're on my back. Train monkey. We got options. I'm going around. Yeah. This is fucking stupid. Why should I jump? You're on my back.

We should have a jumping contest. Just us. Who do you think jumps highest? The highest? Not me. I think jump. Brian, are you broken today? Something?

Are you wanting to do? Yeah, I'm broken. He gave me that joint. Whatever the fuck was in that joint. I told you. One hit. I did take one hit. Do you have a good vertical?

I could probably jump decent. Not like nothing shocking. That is the one of all like the, you know, the physical things and attributes that you can desire. Like I wish I could do this. Yeah. When you're with somebody, especially if they're your size and they have an amazing vertical leap, it's the fucking most fascinating thing to watch them. To watch it because it's totally natural like i've been with people my height they can literally jump 15 inches higher than i can what you're just like holy shit and it's the thing i was like man and it's not from

and the people that i've seen to do it wasn't through like by train every day but it was just that's how high i could jump i jump every day yeah it jump all day. No, it was just a natural, hereditary, like, whatever. They were just born being able to jump through the fucking roof. Supposedly, that's what Bo Jackson was like. That's one of the most amazing physical specimens in recorded time is Bo Jackson. He's still got records in the NFL combine. I think he still holds the record for the 40. Does he really?

I think so. See, that was like watching a human horse. It really was. That guy is an unbelievable athlete. Somebody who wrote a book about him was talking about it. I wish I could remember the guy's

name. I should Google it. Look up Bo Jackson highlights from football when he was at Auburn or when he played for the – if he didn't get his hip injured, there is absolutely no telling what that guy would have done. He would fucking – he was so fast that he was like the fastest guy on the team. But it was on like a 225 or 230 pound body so he could truck people to like just lower his shoulder and just he would deliver hits you know he would give a concussion out with the football in his hand Wow

that just unbelievable physical specimen Bo Jackson Christ and he played professional baseball just because he liked baseball too just one of those guys who's like oh how about I'll also play another professional sport and be awesome at it and just home runs I remember watching him, you ever see a guy because I saw him do this for sure

there's footage of this, Bo Jackson breaking a baseball bat over his leg he would do it like it was nothing. It was like a twig, man. He was like, boop,

like he was breaking a candy bar. Be like, you have half. I'll take half. Yeah. Like he would just snap that shit. Fuck. I struck out.

Apparently he was always able to do freaky shit. This guy was talking about that when he was young, he used to be able to jump over cars. He could jump over the hood of a car. Yeah. I saw a guy do that too. That's crazy. Who Dude, that's crazy. That's like one of the things I was talking about.

I saw a guy do that who was smaller than me, shorter than me, you know? A total fucking just yoked dude. He played running back. He actually broke California state records in high school. And he did that. He jumped over the hood of a car. And I was like, that is amazing to watch. I mean, amazing.

That's crazy. And to watch a guy like that sprint, you're like, oh, dude, I could run forever and never sprint like that. Jesus. Yeah. Yeah, there's a kid that I saw on a video who jumped off a roof, did a backflip off a roof. And it was like a three-story or two-story building. It was the most ridiculous shit I've ever seen. And the kid made it and lived and was fine.

If you want to see, like, that's incredible. If you want to see, like, a crazy other level, like, type of running athlete, like, you just see, like, oh, this is another gear that they have that other people just don't have. Yeah. If you look at, there's this guy that plays football for, like, he plays for the Bills, I think now. His name is C.J. Spiller. And when he was at Clemson, there's highlights of him like where he would stop, like stop in the middle of the field. And there's like five guys surrounding him. And then he just turns it on again.

But he goes to like – he goes to like fifth gear before they get to first. That's like – he just got to his gear so much faster than them. But those are all like dynamite athletes. Yeah. And you're just like that's like he's got to his gear so much faster than them. But those are all like dynamite. Yeah. You know, and you're just like that. That doesn't make sense. Like or like Devin Hester is this guy who plays for the Bears. You know, a well-known returner.

And if you watch his highlights, the thing about him is that he hits. They say like there are guys who have faster 40 times than him, but he hits his highest speed immediately. So it's like he gets the ball and then he's just like, I'm running as fast as I can the first second I have the ball. Whereas everybody else has to. Ramps up. Yeah. And you're just like, holy shit, he is. Like he just, he hit fifth gear immediately.

And you see the other guys. So his off thegate explosion is fantastic. It's incredible. It's incredible. There's no even playing field. The idea that there's an even playing field when it comes to human beings is crazy. Just by looking at the different sizes of us. There's a reason why we need weight classes.

And the variables inside of weight classes, those are also pretty extreme. Some athletes, some people just aren't that coordinated. They don't move that well. And the variables inside of weight classes, those are also pretty extreme with some athletes. Some people just aren't that coordinated. They don't move that well. They don't have that kind of power. And then there's guys that can just learn things like immediately. And they can run like a gazelle and they can do shit to you that you can't do to them. Yeah.

And they were out of the box like that. Yeah. You know, there's guys that are out of the box athletes. If you ever think about how unlikely the total package of LeBron James is. This is crazy. That is a.001% package. A crackhead gives birth to him. How about that right there? Yes, his mama crackhead. Really?

A crackhead? Yes. Not only is his mama crackhead, his mom allegedly was fucking one of his teammates. Oh, that's right. Is that true? Hot sauce in my bag. Delonte West. Is that true?

Yes. Delonte West, man. I think that's his name. Hot sauce in my bag. His mom allegedly had a substance abuse problem. She gives birth to this gigantite super athlete. That's amazing. Who moves like a panther, like a giant panther.

If LeBron James was in MMA, do you know how many people that guy would be fucking up? Oh, yeah. Oh, my God. If you train that guy. If that guy wanted to fight, if he had the will to fight. Yeah. Yeah.

Well, you know, in high school, he was all-state tight tight end, playing football. Because people always talk about, can you imagine this son of a bitch playing football? He stopped playing, I think, after his sophomore season. It was all-state, like, already, like, this is going to be somebody you're going to have to deal with. Right. And stopped playing. But you look at that body.

6'8", 270. Imagine if no body. Jordan learned how to fight. You know what, Steve? Oh, right. I thought LeBron did play football this whole time. Oh, Jesus Christ. What team is he on? You didn't know? Oh,? I thought LeBron did play football this whole time. Oh, Jesus Christ. What team is he on?

You didn't know? Oh, I know. LeBron James. Basketball. Here's what I know about sports is whatever Tom tells me. You don't watch anything outside of that? No, I like tennis. I used to watch that.

What about ladies golf? Do you stick to that? Yes. Every day. She isn't gay. Come on, man. Is that the case? I've heard that said before.

What's that? That ladies golf is like a lot of gay chicks. I think there's a little bit of a- Which I support 100%. Yeah, of course. Always do. Look at the poles. Look at the sticks they use.

There's definitely- What? He's trying today, boy. There's definitely- He just loves anger on his Twitter. That's what it is. Gay golfers. Anger on my Twitter? I don't know who watches ladies golf. I'm not sure what's what it is. I like golfers. Anger on my Twitter?

I don't know who watches ladies golf. I'm not sure what the audience is. They are amazing golfers. They're golfers. They're golfers. So essentially just a bunch of lesbos. Sitting around staring at each other. It's amazing how good they are though.

Fuck man. Well it's one of the few groups that lesbians are able to really grow. Lesbians have a hard time getting a community. Yes. You know like gay dudes have massive communities all over the country. Like there's parts of the Tenderloin. Yes. If you go to the Santa Monica area.

Castro and such. West Hollywood. Yeah, West Hollywood, Santa Monica Boulevard. That's where the dudes are at. That's a goddamn gay area. There are dudes there. They've all conglomerated. They know where the party's at.

Yeah. Miami. Yeah. conglomerated they know where the party's at yeah yeah but then fucking that place on hollywood boulevard though the west on santa monica boulevard that west hollywood spot that is the gayest spot on earth i'm sorry which one let's that area that whole area while you're driving santa monica is that is that club rage still there is it i think yeah i'm sorry i don't go every week that's the flagship club that's the one club, I believe. That was the one that... You know where Doheny is?

I was coming down Doheny and I'm at the red light there and it was a Saturday night and it was fucking beautiful weather and everybody was out and it was a gay party on the streets, man. And there was these two dudes and they both had their hands, their fingers looped

into each other's belt loops and they were have their hands, their fingers looped into each other's belt loops. Nice. And they were interlocked, kind of scissoring and just grinding dicks together. And I was like, I can only watch this a certain amount of time before some gay slips into me. I got to get out of here. It was like a fucking bomb had been ignited and I had to get outside the blast radius. It's like, there's a gay bomb here. But they're so happy.

Oh, they were happy as fuck. Joy. Well, we used to live next to a bear bar in Silver Lake, so you'd have to walk past the bear bar to get to Trader Joe's. Oh, whoa, whoa. That's a specific type of gay bar. Oh, it was so wonderful. And so Tuesday nights is like – Rim job Tuesdays.

Rim job Tuesdays. They have the big sign-out fun. It's rim job Tuesdays. And they had a huge rooster in the back. And these guys just partied. They loved life. And you'd hear – you'd drive by. You could be having the most quiet, lame kind of night.

You're like, there's nothing going on. Yeah, Sunday. And then as you pulled up, you're like – You're like, oh, there's some dicks grinding going on right now. And you're like, ah, neighborhood is alive right now. And the best part, there was a security guard that would stand outside. Oh, yeah. But because he was in front of a gay bar, you didn't know if it was just a costume the first few times.

Yeah, you see him, you're like, that guy's going all out tonight. And he's like, no, I'm the security guy. He had a mustache and his little hat. A mustache. Yeah. There's very few that pull off'm just a security guy. He had a mustache and his little... A mustache. Yeah. There's very few that pull off the John Stossel. Yeah. You know, that thick upper mustache.

Sure. They commit to that, man. That's a strange one. Yeah. That's a strange one. Yeah, I always wonder that, because people usually mock the mustache, you know, or they rock the ironic mustache. Movember.

Yeah. Yeah. But in the gay community, it's like like yo, fucking, I'm down are you? I saw a guy the other day, he was beautiful he had Timbalands on and he had cut off jean shorts and he had like one of those leather

scally caps on and he had a jean jacket that was sleeveless nice he was fucking ridiculous and this was like right after I worked in San Francisco with Greg Fitzsimmons. Greg Fitzsimmons fucking killed me. He got on stage and he goes, this is the last city where there's real faggots. You can see a guy with leather pants and a handlebar mustache.

Oh my God. He'd get fucking crushed too because it was so true yeah these unabashed animals yeah that's fucking funny really like if that guy that you described like if if if cock was a company that's the chairman and ceo of cock timbaland in charge with the fluffy socks you know the stocks are kind of scrunched down. And the Timberlands are like open. And then he's got cut-off jean shorts and a jean jacket. Jesus. He was just so gay.

Sure. Sleeveless. San Francisco? No. This was in Santa Monica, Baltimore. Oh, Santa Monica. Okay. This one, the gayest guy on earth.

On earth. The only one that comes close to him. I was in Houston once, and I wanted to congratulate this guy the way he was rocking it. But I didn't want to offend him, so I let it go. But he had leg warmers on that were rainbow. That's already. Rainbow-colored leg warmers on.

And he had these little designer-like, leg warmers on and he had these little designer like uh they looked like some odd tennis shoe type thing that he was wearing some very trendy tennis shoe and then he had these boys gym shorts these boys remember those gym shorts used to wear they were blue with the white stripe and they were way too small they were way too small okay and he's a frail man as it is. And then he had a pink skin-tight shirt and some crazy multi-colored bandana. And as he was working out, he was working out like this.

Ugh. Ugh. Ugh. Like grunting? Leg warmers, man. This is the gayest man that's ever walked the face of the earth. Absolutely. This guy, if he got together with the other guy, they would create a black hole of homosexuality.

It would eat its way through the cement. Eat cement and spit cum back at you. It would be a sinkhole of gay. If you slipped and fell into it, you'd fall prey to the gay. You saw something. Which one? I lived in San Francisco for years and fell into it, you'd fall prey to the gay. You saw something. Which one? I lived in San Francisco for years. She lived in San Francisco.

I went to college there. You definitely saw the gayest thing that you can see. Which one? There's so many. You said during the parade one time you saw a guy. Two guys fucking on the corner. Yeah, on the street. Just on the street.

We don't need to find a mattress or a bed or an alleyway. If you see guys butt fucking on the street, you'll be like, that's the gayest street ever. You'll never forget the street. We don't need to find a mattress or a bed or an alleyway. If you see guys butt-fucking on the street, you'll be like, that's the gayest street ever. You'll never forget that street. At that moment, it's one of the gayest streets on earth. Sure. But I think it was during the Folsom Street Fair and all. So that's like the gay Mardi Gras. That's when I fuck on the street.

I like to limit it to fairs. Don't bring your kids to that. If you're willing to fuck on the street during a fair, you're a real gangster. You're out there just fucking breaking laws. You're a part of the problem. Hey, remember at the bear gym in our old neighborhood? Yeah. That some guys, so this thing also in bear culture is these big guys, they also like to build their musk.

Yes. And that's another part of it. And Tommy one time, I think you were downwind of a guy. Weren't you? The fan was behind him or something. Fuck, man. And you could smell his musk. It was like, it was so strong.

It wasn't like gym smell strong. It was like a personal body odor that, you know, you can just tell when someone's BO is kicking. Was it kicking because he was dirty? He cultivates. Like you hadn't washed it? Yeah, yeah.

It was definitely a, I haven't showered in like it's been a while maybe it's to ward off the smell of shit while you're fucking you ever think about that i think it was just i mean there's gotta be something he had such a pride he had such pride about his musk i could just tell like the way he was like right you're picking up what i'm putting out there right now like just look about him it's his genre yeah it's a specific i imagine that some people were walking through the gym that day like thanks brother like thanks for putting us out here because you got me fired up you got me ready to do some squats this motherfucker smell good damn damn yeah there's different levels of gay guys too, right? What they're into.

Some guys are just into other crazy big gay guys. And some guys, they're like twinks. They're like little tiny little boys. Hairless. Yeah, there's this dude that I knew that was a producer type character. So, wealthy character. That always had these young boys with him. They were always

like just 20 years old a little confused like that's you know a well-known comic who likes that one do you only know one oh yeah that's true i know several yeah that's sort of uh that's kind of a type there's all types there's otters cubs otters what's an otters? What's an otter? No, I believe an otter. A young? It's a tall, slender hairless is an otter as opposed to a big, hairy fat, which is a bear. And a younger bear is actually a cub, right? A cub. So bears go with cubs. And cubs are just smaller and more malleable. That was Twilight's.

But now I heard that the word twink is becoming taboo. Twink is bad? The way that fag is kind of not cool to say. I think twink is starting to become in the air. Oh, God. Everybody's fired up about this. Can we stop the tide of... They're all meatballs.

Well, here's what happened. So Andy Cohen on Bravo, I think he went on some other show and he's like, oh, look at all these twinks here. And then the twink community got really upset and started tweeting this. Yeah, I know. And so he apologized to the twinks. Oh, God. But isn't he gay?

Yes. He is so gay. Yeah, he's totally. Oh, God. He apologized to the twinks. Everybody is just looking for an opportunity to be sensitive. Yes. We are in such a weird time.

It is weird. It's like people have found reward in like pointing at like hot button things like that like hey you know at the twin community we do not reach it or being offended it was all organized yeah you know who else is fucking super annoying and like this i mean this was a way different level of like how fucking what assholes they are is this like one million moms group it's just like we're mothers that are christian that want to raise fucking like great kids and like but we're complete completely bigoted discriminatory assholes they publicly lash out for the this is like the second or third time at jcenney for having Ellen DeGeneres as their

spokesman. They're like, you realize that none of us are ever going to shop there again because you hired Ellen to be your, that kind of shit. And they got really mad about her latest Christmas commercial with elves and they're like, you have a fucking gay woman with elves? What's going to fucking happen next?

Sodomy! Hey, that's a good point. Yeah. I mean, what would happen next? What will happen next if lesbians and elves get together? You've got lesbians mixing up with magical creatures.

That's right. Shit could get crazy. Definitely. What if they, like, develop some, what if they have nefarious intentions and they develop

some sort of lesbian pixie dust? That's right. And they spray it over a city while they're flying around. And your kids become gay elves. And everybody becomes

lesbian elves. Yeah, we've got a bunch of miniature gay elves running around. And your kids become gay elves. Yeah, we get a bunch of miniature gay elves running around. Listen, man, you mock. Now, I wonder, does the lesbian community have these genres? I don't know. I don't know much. Yeah, they have lipstick lesbians.

They have those Fred Flintstone-looking lesbians. Lipstick's the best, right? Yeah, that's the kind that you like. The lipstick's the pretty one Yeah that's the kind That you like Yeah Yeah the lipsticks Definitely That's what the straight guys like Oh yes 100%

Yeah yeah The other ones are intimidating Especially if they want to fight Yeah They're not always good at shows either They don't even have the best sense of humor No they can They can be cool

For me maybe They can be cool They can be cool Yeah of course It's like you can't really generalize A whole fucking sexual orientation No I love them Of course not

Yeah I've met a lot of cool lesbians Me too Yeah they you can't really generalize a whole fucking sexual orientation. No, I love them. Of course not. Yeah. I've met a lot of cool lesbians. Me too. Yeah, they're great. I've met a lot of annoying straight people too. Yeah, everybody sucks in their own way. God damn it.

That's true. That's sort of the anti-positive approach. Everybody's got their own special gift. Everybody sucks in their own way. He took that shit to the dark place. It's true. That's hilarious. And so true.

It is true. Yeah. We're all. We have a little something fucking with us. I have to ask you this. It's true. That's hilarious. And so true. It is true. Yeah. We're all... We have a little something fucking with us. I have to ask you this because I haven't... I wanted to get your thoughts on Pacquiao going down

to Marquez. It was crazy. Crazy, huh? Yeah. Well, Manny Pacquiao, first of all, is a super nice guy. Tosh and I filmed

this thing with him where I played Daniel Tosh's manager and he was gonna let Manny Pacquiao punch him in the face for some strange reason. Fuck that.

And so Manny Pacquiao, he's very nice about it, by the way. He like, like kind of tapped him and I'm like, hit him harder, hit him harder.

And Tosh is looking at me like, what the fuck, man? Trust me, he's not gonna hurt you, dude. Just hit him a little harder, just a little harder.

You know, and even then, Manny Pacquiao just sort of popped. Like so gently tapped him. But he's so nice. He's like a really friendly guy. He doesn't have any weird feeling around him. He's a super duper star. He travels deep with like this giant entourage that's taking care of everything around him all the time. And he's like the nicest guy in the world.

So that made me sad. But that's the game he's like the nicest guy in the world so that made me sad but that's the game he's playing yeah he plays a crazy game that that game is you you are competing with your consciousness you're competing with your physical health you're competing against another man who's a trained killer yeah and when when he hits you you your body is just like any other body and if someone hits you perfectly like he did twice he knew twice he dropped him with that first one and most likely he was still hurt from that but that second punch was so powerful that was like the perfect punch because Pacquiao was moving forward and Marquez caught him moving forward and just crushed him in his tracks.

He was lights out on the way down. It was one of the worst or best one punch knockouts I've ever seen in all of boxing. I think it goes in the top ten. It's like that shit is right up there with Paul Williams getting knocked out by Sergio Martinez. Did you see that?

Sergio Martinez has got a vicious left hand and he's like super athletic and moves around a lot. And he nailed Paul Williams like this perfect overhand left as he was moving in and just spun him around and face-planted. It was just like that. Jesus. But I just didn't expect to see that with Pac now. Well, you know, I think I was seeing some stats on it that that was his first time being knocked out since 98. Really?

Or maybe not down even since 98. I think he's been dropped. Dropped? I think he's been dropped. Some incredible stat that, like, it hadn't happened since 98. I think, actually, now that I think about it, I think Marquez dropped him in his fight, in this fight, before he knocked him out. That was the first time Marquez had knocked him down. He had knocked Marquez down before, but Marquez had staggered him before.

But somebody had stopped him earlier in his career. Yeah. He had been knocked out earlier in his career, but never like this. This was one of those knockouts that might just be a game changer. Yeah. It would be a game changer. Yeah. That's a really – and boxers, what you're seeing, first of all, in Manny,

is you're seeing a guy who's already had – before this fight, they had three crazy fucking wars. Right. Three wars. Yeah, brutal wars. Back and forth, blasting each other. And you – how many of those can you have really in your life? Yeah. There's a number.

It might be ten. It might be seven. Everybody's different depending on when you start, depending on how good your defense is, but you're going to get nailed. You're getting your head hit, you're getting your body hit. You've got a lot of fucking problems. And that, among other fights, training, sparring sessions, just hundreds of punches. That was the point. The point is what you're seeing is a tiny fraction of the actual damage

his head has taken because you're only seeing one fight. So you think about all the fights that he's had, all the punches that he's taken. It's a tremendous amount of punishment as is. Then you have to factor in the fact that that is a fraction of the actual punishment. Then you start getting an idea of what the fuck is really going on when you're training for a fight. You have to have a number in your head or a feeling or a time or what. You got to know when to fucking get out because the more you do that shit, the more one day it's going to catch up with you.

But with a guy like Pacquiao, it's super hard for those guys to just go out on top. Floyd may rather retire than he came back. He almost went out on top. He almost said, fuck it, went out on top. But I think he's probably the most cautious out of all of them. Floyd. Yeah. Yeah.

He's the most cautious stylistically, you know, very rarely gets hit when he does get hit, recovers very well. Yeah. Like Shane Mosley was the last one to tag him. Yeah. He goes through entire fights where he barely gets tagged.

Yeah. Yeah. He just boxes the shit out of people. Yeah. You know, and I love that. I love the fact that the guy's still, he's like, not only is he unbeaten,

he's really unchallenged. I think he's 36 now. That's pretty unheard of. And he looks fantastic. His defense is so incredible. He's a brilliant boxer. He's brilliant. And he probably would have boxed the shit out of Manny Pacquiao. Especially seeing

what he did to Martinez and what Pacquiao was able to do to Martinez. And then the difference is Martinez and Floyd wasn't even close. Floyd just outboxed the shit out of him. I mean, he just couldn't get to him. Floyd is just too good. He's too good at positioning. He throws amazing punches.

He recovers well. And people don't realize sometimes that, depending on how good whoever he's fighting at the time, that a lot of times he boxes gloves down because he's so quick he doesn't even, he doesn't pull up his gloves for a lot of fights his gloves are down and he's dipping

around, like playing with people he does that shoulder roll thing where he walks towards guys with his left shoulder up high and his right glove by his face. And they don't know what to do with that. He's so good. His reflexes are so good. And now that Adrian Broner guy, have you seen that kid?

That upcoming kid? Oh, my God. This kid's a monster. He's like Floyd Mayweather but with more punching power. Same weight class? I think he's 47. I'm not sure. Or he might be 35. but with more punching power. Same weight class? I think he's 47. I'm not sure. He's just...

Or he might be 35. He's either 35 and struggling to make the weight and moving up to 40 or 47. Whatever it is. This kid's dynamite. He has that same style. That high left shoulder up. It's incredible.

There's some fucking killers out there. No fucking lead glove for most of your... Your left glove is down. It's crazy. It is crazy, but they're so good at those duck and roll, counter right hands. And you don't want to get clipped by that shit. So like guys are real cautious. And he's so good at like slipping jabs, so good at anticipating your movement.

The best boxers are great at leading guys into certain directions and anticipating how they respond. And so like a guy like Floyd Mayweather is not like an impulsive guy. He's like a guy who's going to set traps for you. Right. So he'll lead you in certain directions and see how you respond and then lead you in that certain direction again and see how you respond and then set you up for a time where he's going to lead you in that certain direction

and he's going to stop, bang, and he's going to catch you because you do a certain thing over and over again. You do a certain thing with gloves and you move off the ropes, and he's going to catch you. He's going to figure it out. He's going to figure it out, and that's another thing that Anderson Silva does. Anderson Silva, he moves around with the guy for the first minute or two,

kind of gets a sense of how he operates, how he moves, feints him a little bit, and then starts setting him up. Starts setting him up starts setting him up for death yeah for death yeah setting him up for a dismantling yeah floyd's even his defense is so interesting and and so developed that like when you watch him box sometimes you'll see him get up against the ropes yeah and you're like oh he's he's up against the ropes this guy might take advantage of this and And then Floyd somehow pulls it into his – like his defense becomes his offense. And you're like, oh, no, he's fucking ripping this guy apart. He's just too good. He's so good at straight boxing.

I mean it's amazing. And he's a guy that's had a lot of hand problems too. That guy broke his hands several times. So he goes for like the biggest, cushioniest gloves. And because of that, I think this – because of his fragile hands, he probably – there's a lot of guys heioniest gloves And because of that I think Because of his fragile hands There's a lot of guys he doesn't knock out Because of that very reason Because he's had problems with his hands

Over and over again But the way he knocked out Homeboy from England What the fuck's his name? Hatton Ricky Hatton Holy shit That was brilliant

And that was when Hatton was in his prime Hatton was an animal He just boxed the shit out of them. He just boxes the shit out of guys. They just can't get to him. You just remind me I'm going to be in Vegas this week. Yo, Floyd, if you want to grab lunch, if you want to grab dinner, please bring Roger. Yo, Floyd, he wants to be a part of Team Money.

Money Team all the way, man. Big fan. Tommy Bunz is all about Team Money. Money Team. I want to roll with you. I need a new watch, team money. Is he fighting Cat Williams? Money team. I want to roll with you. I need a new watch, dog. What is going on, man?

Cat Williams hit somebody in the head with a microphone or something? And he punched a dude in Target. He slapped that guy. What is going on with Cat? He got in a car chase with the cops. He's working on a new hour. Give him a fucking break. Yeah.

Jesus Christ. So sensitive. Wait, what was that? To bring back to me, we watched this 24-7. Was that his uncle that trains him? Yeah, Roger. I love that guy. Black Mamba.

He was a former champion himself. Roger Mayweather had a vicious right hand. What a great family. The 24-7. Miguel Cotto is still my favorite, right? When Cotto's like, I know Floyd is a supreme athlete, great boxer, and we have to be ready for war. And they cut to Roger Mayweather.

He goes, what the fuck about Miguel Cotto? Not just that. That's rad. Well, the level of technique that Floyd has is so above and beyond everybody else he fights that he has that kind of confidence. Miguel Cotto, especially during that that fight was a prime athlete margarita was the only one that ever really fucked up miguel cotto when he was in his prime yeah that stopped him and that was when margarita was accused of having loaded gloves yeah because he got busted and sure he did one of his uh subsequent fights but miguel cotto was a badass fucking boxer yeah what that got uh but boxing with floyd is like he just he makes everybody

look goofy he makes everybody look they they look like they just don't really know what he's doing they don't really belong in there with him he's he figured you out early enough and now every time you step he's popping a jab in your face and there's no retaliation he's not there and then you know and you look stupid you do and he slowly breaks you down it's just so good he's a superb superb boxer man it's a perv athlete but if I had a choice between watching him and Anderson Silva I'd be like bitch yeah I would way rather watch Anderson Silva it's not even a question that's one of the reasons why I like MMA so much better I like a good fight with Floyd Mayweather you know like if I found out Floyd

Mayweather is gonna fight Pacqu if I found out Floyd Mayweather was going to fight Pacquiao before this last thing, then I would be super excited. Sure. But you know,

when he's fighting, if he's fighting somebody that I don't give a fuck about, it's like, yeah, he's just going to box this guy up. It'll be interesting to watch,

you know, but I can watch it on HBO next week. Sure. Yeah. What, how, I've asked this before,

but how famous is Anderson Silva in Brazil? Oh, it's like Michael Jordan and Michael Jackson had a baby. Really? That famous? It's incredible. He's a super, super, superstar. They love him, man.

That's awesome. The cheers when he goes into the octagon, when he steps up the stairs and walks in and they close the door behind him. They're fucking deafening. I took my headphones off and I said, I go to Mike Goldberg while I was talking to him on the air, I go,

take your headphones off. I go, take your headphones off and feel this. He takes the headphones off. He's like, we're just looking at each other like, whoa.

There's 20,000 people in Rio and they are going fucking bananas. Yes. And Anderson walks in and bows and they're going fucking ape shit. That's so cool. And then he in and bows and they're going fucking ape shit. That's so cool. And then he goes out there and dismantles Stefan Bonner in a way that doesn't even seem human. Yeah.

He did it like some fucking kung fu movie dude who just got bolted with some secret lightning power. Right. Like he had a superpower. So it didn't even make any sense. He did movie shit. He stepped with his back up against the cage and let Stefan Bonner throw punches at him with his hands down. And just ducked and moved in front of him. And then threw Bonner to the ground and knocked him unconscious with a knee to the body.

Blasted him with a knee to the body. And he goes, boom. He goes down in a turtle position. Done. I mean, the way he did it was like, it was superhuman. It was like a guy in a movie. If you saw a guy do that in Born Identity, you'd be like, bitch, nobody can do that. Get the fuck out of here.

Put your back up against the wall. Nobody puts their back up against the cage. How about the best fighter in the fucking world does that? The best guy ever puts his back up against the cage. To a big giant dude like Stefan Bonner, who's cut in down from like 230 to fight at 205, and Anderson fights at 185. He's still, Raddol's the guy. It's freaky.

He's freaky. There's nobody that freaks me out when you watch them, when you watch the shit that they can do to really high-level grown fighters. No one freaks me out like Anderson. Yeah. It's like you're watching a rare master like you're what you're like you're gonna get a chance to talk about this when you get old you know like there's people that we talk about and they saw joe lewis fight yeah yeah

that's all well and good anderson silver would have fucked up joe lewis yeah okay yeah and listen to me i don't get what anybody says yeah anderson silver in an mma fight would fuck joe lewis up all right you're watching something crazy you're watching the baddest fighter that's ever walked Listen to me. I don't get what anybody says. Anderson Silva in an MMA fight with fuck Joe Louis up. You're watching something crazy. You're watching the baddest fighter that's ever walked the face of the planet. The shit he does to guys, even like really good guys, it's shocking. Do you think he could beat Jean-Claude Van Damme? I don't know. It depends on which movie it is.

If it's like one of Jean-Claude Van Damme's, like one of his signature movies. Bloodsport? If it's like a Bloodsport 2, Van Damme has heart that you will never be able to appreciate. My heart. Have you ever seen him cry in his reality show? It's amazing. Yeah, I did see that. He has a show.

I didn't even know. He used to, right? Not now. Or Steven Seagal. I remember him. He is awesome. He's awesome. Steven Seagal. He's awesome in a totally different way than – Steven Seagal is remember him He is awesome He's awesome Steven Seagal

He's awesome in a totally different way Steven Seagal is awesome as well But Jean-Claude Van Damme is awesome in a completely different way What was the cool movie that he came out with a year or two ago? What was the movie he came out with that was about What do you think I'm crazy? You think I know what movies he's doing? No, no, no

This one was actually good Come on, Joe Where he played JCVD Yeah, he played himself. Yes, that's right. That was good. That happened on Blu-ray.

I like that. I'm a fan. I'm a fan. I'm a fan. I never said I wasn't a fan. Yeah. I love Jean-Claude Van Damme. He's still crazy, okay?

And he has a reality show, and he plays, I guess, I've only seen the videos on the internet, but you could readily get them on the internet. But it's wonderful, okay. He's crazy. Yeah, okay, and he keeps talking about I'm going to have this fight I'm going to have to fight one more time for the children Crazy ideas I did you know they say you did a lot of cocaine and you know, you know a lot of other things I'm not happy about those other things But I'm going to make it up with this fight and I'm going to win by knockout.

And it's like so crazy and over the top. Like he's acting. It's like this strange hybrid between a reality show and a movie. And what he's doing is really strange because he's saying he's going to have a fight and he's got this guy that he keeps dragging around with him that he's saying he's had.

But the problem is he's been doing this for like four years. So this guy, for these four years, he's been saying he's going to fight. Yeah. And they pose for stare downs. For years. For years, man. I mean for fucking years. That's weird.

It's still going on. That's hilarious. And he's still like, well, you know, I'm going to have this fight and I'm going to do it for the children and to show them you can bounce back from all of this bullshit and this cocaine and it's fucking wonderful can we do that?

that might be it that might be one of them there's a lot of them but generally he seems like a really nice guy he seems like real friendly he doesn't seem like he's trying to be a hard ass. Like even when he's saying like he's going to knock you out, you're like, oh, come on. Give me a hug. Come on.

Get over here and give me a hug. By the way – You don't need cocaine, man. You need to stop. You know that you said it's like a weird hybrid between like reality and like – I think that's the new and next step that's going to really develop for television is like shows like uh duck hunters the duck dynasty duck dynasty where it's that family and they go this is a reality show but it's clearly like it's produced too well right you're

like there's no way like these are real people they're not you know they're not actors but like all the moments are too well construct like produced the wife comes in right at the moment when the guys are like fucking cutting a hole in the ceiling and she's like texas doing it's uh it's in louisiana yeah it's louisiana you done lost your redneck oh man you done lost yeah it's a funny show yeah you're dating all these uh what is it called me yuppie girls that don't need Oh, man, you done lost your redneck. It's a funny show. I'll show you I ain't lost my redneck. Yeah. You're dating all these, what is it called?

Yuppie girls that don't eat frog legs. I love that old guy. The patriarch's great in that. It's so full of shit, though. It's full of shit. Have you seen Swamp People? No. Okay, Swamp People is just, they should call that show Alligator Assassins.

Okay? Because it's just a bunch of motherfuckers that live in Florida and kill alligators. And they kill a fuckload of alligators. Okay? They kill like 500 of them a season. I went to high school with a few of those guys. I think I remember them. Dude, they kill a lot of alligators.

It's really freaky to think there's that many goddamn alligators out there. And you know what's really freaky? A lot of people might not like this, but if they weren't killing those alligators, those alligators would fuck and many goddamn alligators out there. And you know what's really freaky? A lot of people might not like this, but if they weren't killing those alligators, those alligators would fuck and make more alligators. And if you think of how many fucking alligators they're killing, do you know what kind of an infestation of alligators we must have in this country? I know, right?

Jesus Christ. They're killing hundreds and hundreds of them. And in Florida? Holy shit. Yeah, you have to. Yeah, they have to. It's still in other people's backyards all the time, man. All the time. When I lived in Gainesville,

they were protected. You couldn't kill them. Really? Yeah, when I was a kid, I lived in Florida. I didn't know that. Yeah, yeah. I lived in Gainesville for two years. My dad was going to the University of Florida, and we used to go to Lake Alice. There's this little lake there,

and we used to feed the alligators marshmallows. Get out. Yeah, you'd flip marshmallows in the water. You'd be like, whoa, these are crazy monsters. We're feeding these monsters. But they didn't really fuck with people too much. They occasionally would get a dog. If they walked their dog too close to the water, didn't see the alligator, alligator can't help themselves.

But I guess they would feed them or something. I don't know what the fuck they did did they must have done something to keep them happy if they're around people but apparently it got to a certain point where there was just so many fucking alligators they had to do something oh yeah i've every i mean i used to see i went to high school in florida and you know you would see them all courses you see people's backyards there are a lot of people have pools in florida how often do they kill people alligators i don't think it happens that often i don't think it happens that often. I don't think it happens that often.

But I mean, I'm sure there's statistics on it. But I don't remember a lot of... One a year maybe? Maybe one of those kind of things, yeah. I know people lose limbs and people go to get their golf ball and they go into a little pond or the lake and you can lose a hand.

Yeah, I think you got to be fucking with them. I think you let that ball go. Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck. Get a new Titleist. Jesus Christ. Leave it in the water. Absolutely. So terrifying, man.

But I don't think they like human flesh. That's not their first preference. I know because when I was on road rules... They eat shit. They'll eat a bag of shit. They will. They will. They would eat people.

They just haven't. License plates and tires and shit. But it's not their preference. When we were on road rules in Australia, we went to a crocodile farm. And the guy that owned it was explaining how they don't really want to eat us. But if they're hungry and there's nothing else, that's when they'll fuck with you. If you're down by the fucking swamp and you're like, oh, hey, what are you doing here? And then it'll grab you and death roll you.

But I think that the only reason why they don't do it is because they don't recognize us as a food source. As a delicious meal. Because they don't usually eat us. But once they recognize us as a food source, that's when it becomes

a real problem. Like there was one they killed in the Philippines recently and it was fucking huge, huge saltwater crocodile. And it had killed a bunch of villagers. They knew that there was

this one giant crocodile who was more than 20 fucking feet long. And it was killing people. So they had to go after it and go get it. And there was that one that was killing a bunch of people, wasn't it, in Canada? One that the movie is based on? Canada?

Yeah, yeah. A crocodile in Canada? No, some lake. It was like a northern sitting lake. Really? Not a croc, maybe. Maybe a gator. Right, that's what the movie's about.

What movie is it? Lake. Lake. I remember what you're talking about. Not Lake Michigan. Remember the movie Lake Michigan? No. Was it Placid?

I remember. Lake Placid. Lake Placid, the movie. That's based on a real story. Get the fuck out of here. I swear to God. Get the fuck out of here. I think I met one of the writers on that who told me that.

Yeah. What? I'm pretty sure, man. Because once I get like 20 feet. I might be wrong on the location, but I know it's based on a real murdering gator. What? A murdering gator? I think so.

Is that right? Oh, maybe. What's the true story of Lake Placid's alligator? Let's go to WikiAnswers. How beautiful is this day and age? You can just do that remember when you used to have encyclopedia britannica that shit was whack as fuck i know the story is based off the 1943 mysterious disappearances of 10 teenagers while playing

one night on lake placid okay so it's just a okay it's just a rumor okay but the mood what so the movie just the movie adds the gator concept to it or something? Well, apparently it became a legend because it happened in 1943, and so people would talk about it, and so the movie is based on this actual monster, and it's sort of a tiny treat. It's an actual story. Guys, Tom's right.

Don't send me your tweets or your emails about how I'm wrong. I'm right. We just read it on the internet. Basically, what you said cannot be argued. There you go. Yeah. That's a dumbass movie. Fucking alligator.

I think. I know. That alligator would be freezing his dick off. It's in New York, right? It's in Michigan. Is that where it took place? Is that where it took place? Yeah.

30-foot-long man-eating crocodile, which terrorizes the fictitional location of Black Lake, Maine. Oh, that's even more ridiculous. Maine. Maine is only like thawed out for like a month a year. Yeah, that is correct. Maine. There you go. Fuck.

So I wasn't that far off when I said Canada, right? New York State is pretty close. Canada is close to Maine. Sure. There you go. You were in that box. True story. Yeah.

There you go. Write it down. That's a – Winter gators. If you think about like a perfect nightmare that's chasing after you, it's a giant reptile, right? Oh, yeah. Easily. Because they're so emotionless and cunty and just –

Yes. They don't give a fuck. It's a dinosaur, right? It's like a – It's just an extension of like a T-Rex chasing you. It's an animal that has virtually not changed for 200 million years. They existed in this form 200 million years ago. What the fuck, man?

So strong. They're all muscle, muscle, muscle. And they're just like the cleaning systems of ecosystems. Yeah, right. They're the cleaners. They come in. Anything that's limping, you're done, son. You're done, anything that's limping, you're done, son. Anything that gets jacked,

anything that goes and tries to get water out of the wrong spot, slam, keep the population down. Boom! Are we trying to cross this river? Not! Have you ever seen those river crossings with those Nile crocodiles? Step up and just huge

dinosaur jaws clamp down on wildebeests and drag them underwater. You're like, what is going on here? This is a system that's set up. Totally. A life system, life and death. There's a population control mechanism in effect. Big cats and alligators. I mean, crocodiles.

Is it any coincidence that's the place where there's the most gazelles? Oh, yeah. Those fucking things are running around everywhere. Everything's running around everywhere. Wildebeest and all these things. Just giant things trying to eat them and keep their populations down. The footage of that is always the same. If you watch those Nat Geo shows, there'll be these 50 gazelles crossing the river.

And you're like, huh. And then three seconds go by and you're like huh i wonder and then like three seconds go by and you're like oh there's one that's not with the pack i think we should watch him for a second and then you watch him kind of limp in tentatively cross the creek and that croc comes up and it's like game fucking over i love it they're such machines they're so terrifying and they can be under that water for hours they They don't have to breathe for hours. So they sit under the water waiting for someone to come by.

And then the water's all fucking murky and shit. You can't see that big dinosaur waiting there to eat babies. That monster. And how perfectly designed is he? Where when you see footage of his eyes just out of the water. So it's just up like just over the water.

You're like, oh, shit. Horrific, horrific monster. I remember, okay, this is going to sound really lame, but on road drills, we had to put a bag over a crocodile's head. Oh, my God. So first you have to clamp its jaw shut and then duct tape it, and then you put a bag on its head, and then you sit on it. You have to sit on it

to hold it still and that's how we would transport it like for one of the missions. Oh, that's hilarious. That was, so this guy Keefla on the show, he had a pole and he was trying to rope

the crocodile's neck and the crocodile went into a death roll. Oh, Jesus. And his shirt got caught in the pole and started to twist around his arm and it was cutting off a circulation. Oh, my God. And everybody was like, holy fuck. Like, when that really happens on a reality show like you don't know what

to do so he was just screaming cut the shirt cut the shirt cut the fuck out and like you know there's no scissors in the outback like somebody had to rummage through their sound kit or whatever and this thing was still spinning spinning and spinning how big is this alligator i was it was medium size 10 to 15 feet long like a teenager it it's was its teeth clamped down on his shirt yeah so you clamp the jaws shut and then somebody duct tapes the jaws together somehow another it got a hold of the teeth so no so so the next part is you have to put something around its neck and so kifla was using a pole with the rope at the end of it like a loop rope so they loop it that right so he did it and somehow this crocodile like got latched onto maybe in his jaw the rope the rope

and he just started death rolling oh wow so that it got the pole in the pole got sure on his sleeve and then tighten the sleeve so we had to cut the shirt off of him Jesus Christ you wear a spandex when you're fucking with crocodiles. Yeah. It's very important. You need to be all tucked up and ready to sprint.

Real talk. You need cleats. You need cleats as well. You don't want to be slipping. No, dude. Jesus Christ. Dangerous. They found Nile crocodiles in Florida.

Have you heard that? No. They have a shoot-to-kill order on Nile crocodiles in Florida. They spotted a couple of them. So people order on Nile crocodiles in Florida. They spotted a couple of them so people transported in Nile That was probably some dude who's trying to guard his cocaine I know what I'm gonna do I'm gonna have a fucking more with Nile crocodile. So it's a big ones 28 foot long, you know He's a motherfucking will the BC one by bike. You're going to fuck with my coke.

Some Colombian. That's right. Yeah, that was. Well, didn't those dudes back in, like, the Miami Vice days, didn't, like, those dudes, like, have, like, leopards in their backyard? Oh, shit. We saw in tubs, right? Yeah, those guys, too.

Not those guys. I mean, he had a crocodile in his boat. Yeah. Remember that? Yes, that's what I'm saying. Or an alligator, some sort of a big lizard. He did, dude. It was on his boat. That's right. It was chained up on his boat. Remember that? Yes, that's what I'm saying. Or an alligator, some sort of a big lizard. He did, dude.

It was on his boat. That's right. It was chained up on his boat. That's what I'm talking about. That was the douchiest era. I got a crack.

That was the douchiest era in all of humanity. Those 80s, the 80s cocaine days of Miami is the douchiest era of all time. Everybody wanted

to have a pet tiger. You go over to this guy's house, he's got fucking peacocks walking on his front lawn. You're like, what's happening here? Oh, my shit. This is my python collection. What we do is we grow them to about 10 feet long and then just take them out of the Everglades. You can't control them

after they're 10 feet long. I just get a new one and start from scratch, retrain them, just releasing pythons. They fucking have pythons out there long it's the same dude who has like grenades like i got 100 grenades in the living room i got rocket launchers under my couch but i don't tend to use them why do you have that man if you want to blow through a wall you know there's a wall in your way that's why i got a puma in my weight room.

Yeah, I got a puma that I keep there for inspiration. Sometimes I don't feel him. He get real hungry. I'll be lifting weights right next to him. I got some wolf colors. Motivation. It's just the fact that he eyeballing me, knowing that I look delicious and nutritious, and he's starving to death, and they made me do more squats.

They made me do more squats. I got paper plates with diamonds on them and shit. Well, what's that shit in New York City? I saw a reality show where someone, they would buy like baby crocodiles and shit and keep them in the bathtub. Yeah, well, people do that. There was a guy who got- Cool guy.

I think it was either Brooklyn or the Bronx, but he got mauled by a tiger that he had as a pet in an apartment. Tommy's got a joke about that. Oh, you do? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, I don't want to give up your bits. No, man. No, it's just funny.

It's an old one. Oh, it's an old joke? Yeah, yeah, yeah. How does it go? Come on, hit it, buddy. No. Too long. I'll do it if you tell me the words.

I talk about another guy. I'll do it. I talk about the guy, what's it called, that had the animals at his house and he released them. You know, remember? In Ohio. Oh, the guy in Ohio, yeah. I have a bit about that. It's on my new album.

He killed himself, right? I'm not plugging it or anything. Didn't he kill himself? Yeah, he did. He killed him. Well, he cut up, he released them all. Right. And then I believe he cut up like some chickens and like poured the blood all over himself with dead animals on him.

And then he had lions and shit that he released, so he got fucked up by everything. I think he might have been dead before they got to him, but they eventually, animals were pulling his dead body apart. That's a crazy way to go out. I've never heard that before. That's a dude who really loves animals.

Yeah, right? Part of the ecosystem. What a silly fuck. Yeah. Well, you know, the whole zoo life is really a crazy torture that we do so that we can look at animals in real life. Because they don't even allow them to live a natural life while in captivity. It's one thing if we had them in an ecosystem that was similar to their own. So we put them in these containment areas. Then we let loose antelopes or whatever the fuck it is that they get to run and chase down and kill

if that was the case i think that that would at least be like a rewarding life for these cats when you keep pushing that meat out to them and they don't get any sort of chase reward thing going on we we see like they play with each other like they want to chase things like it's a part of the whole dynamics of their organism like they're designed to chase and kill shit they're designed to kill all the limping shit and so you put them in this cage you're just like

jolting their brain like they never get a chance to express what they were put on earth to do it sounds fucked up but but I mean what are you going to do you're going to stop the gazelles from breeding and you're going to control? Are you going to stop the gazelles from breeding? And are you going to control the gazelle? Put a few fucking gazelles in the cage with him.

Okay? Just let him in there. Yeah, and then invite me to watch it. I'll pay extra. Well, here's the key. Here's the key. What's the difference, goddammit, between the meat that you're giving him? Because you're giving him meat.

Someone's killing an animal. And someone's giving him that meat. Why can't he do that? Because you know he wants to. Someone else is killing it. It's not like you're saving an animal. Someone else is killing a fucking animal and you're cutting it up

and then you're sliding under the track. Why not just let a cow loose and let them go? And talk about driving up revenue. Yeah, I've watched that. Hey, it's an extra 70 to watch. Absolutely. Here you go. You know that's what they do in Asia. In Asia when they feed tigers, hey, it's an extra 70 to watch, I'd be like, here you go.

Well, you know, that's what they do in Asia. In Asia, when they feed tigers, they release goats. Brian, Brian, pull one of those videos up. You ready to freak the fuck out? Yes. Yes. This is like a common theme, apparently, in Asia. When they have tigers, they just have this big dump truck,

and they have the dump truck with a couple of fucking goats in it, and they doot, doot, deet, deet, deet. And the goat doesn't know what the fuck is going on. But the tigers do. You know what? Because a new goat gets dropped off like that every day. So the tigers, like, stand there and stare while this thing backs up and beeps. And they just wait.

And they get real close to it. And as soon as the thing opens, the goats out and boom they jump on it three four amount of time rip it apart into shreds in a matter of seconds and they run away with like one's got a head one's got a leg i love this you find any that's what they're supposed to do wait till you see this shit because this is a weird thing to see but this is what they want to do okay i mean if you're gonna kill that goat, if you're going to kill that goat anyway, if you're going to feed them goat, why wouldn't you do that? Because then at least, I mean, it's still fucked up that you've got them contained like that, but at least then they get to live a tiger's life.

I feel like the only reason we don't get that is because of some type of animal rights organizations here that don't really exist in other parts of the world. You know what I'm saying? I think our own lives for a lot of people are so fucking suppressive and ridiculous and restrained that we don't give a fuck about that stupid elephant. Tough shit, bitch. Take your cage.

I don't like my cubicle. You don't like your cage? Oh, here it goes. Look at this. They're just sitting there watching and waiting. These are lions. This is a different one. Wow. But I guess they do with lions too. These are lions. This is a different one.

But I guess they do with lions too. So they're just sitting around, and they lift up this dunk truck. They're opening the door right now, and the lions are just hovering right in front of it. Here it comes. There's all the lions there. This would be a shitty way to go. That beep is this guy honking his horn. He's trying to control the lions by honking his horn. Imagine if you're in this.

Good luck with that. And you're hog tied. This horn ain't doing shit to these lions. Because they know. Here it comes. With the horn. Now the guy's going to lift it up. It's really going high now.

And the thing's going to drop out. Why is he honking with the horn son of a bitch maybe he's got his dick out he's really excited hey well they're here he pulled it out of it there it is oh oh my god that's it they just latch onto it like a toy rip it to shreds look at it they're all playing tug of war there's like nine lines and another one tries to tries to get in and this one pawed at him. See that one's pawing at him? I don't hear it crying anymore. What happened? Because that guy's honking. No, I think... Look at that! God damn it. Awesome! People are screaming.

That is awesome. Wow, I'd pay a lot to see that. That is awesome. I'd pay a lot to see that. Oh my gosh. Is that a seven-year-old? Okay, you do not want to fuck that chick. Is that a girl or a boy? If that's a girl, you do not want to fuck her. If that's a boy, he needs to be monitored.

He needs to be monitored. Look at that piece that it's got. These are impressive, but these are lions. If you can find tigers, Brian, see if you can find tigers. Because the tiger video that I saw is way more quick. Way more quicker. That kid was spot on, though. Way more ferocious.

But this does seem more humane, oddly, when you're feeding these wild animals. Oh, it's totally more humane. To allow them to be in their element, to be in nature. That's what they're supposed to be doing. Yes. We've already, I think that way is ridiculous with a slow dump truck. Yeah. But there should be a gate and you should let a couple of them out in the morning.

Yeah. What are the fuck are you going to do? I think the footage I saw one time was from the Baghdad Zoo was like that. Terrible way to die. Someone's honking their horn. And all of a sudden they're playing tug of war with your body. Just ripping parts off your body. With these monstrous jaws and giant white teeth that penetrate flesh. And just pulling you apart literally for your sustenance.

For your flesh. What a suck world the world of the jungle is. My god. The world of the jungle is a motherfucker. Here's another one. This guy's,'s again same thing this time it's tigers look how much bigger the tigers are the lions again a motherfucker with a horn this is like sport for them i guess they don't want to climb it inside there it is oh

jesus check this out it's a big ow look at this boom oh. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Listen to that thing make noise. Oh, man, it's biting. He's killing it now. He's just getting a hold of the neck. Look at that. That's it.

He broke the neck and killed it. Look how quick he killed that thing, man. That's a cow. Dude, he killed that cow, like, instantly with his jaws. Dude, he killed that cow like instantly with his jaws. He just took it, snapped it, and killed it. It didn't look like it took a lot of effort. No. It kind of looked like he was picking up a cup to have a sip out of it. That was a cow one.

I've seen it like with the goat ones, the most fucked up one because they just tear them apart and run away with the pieces. Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh. What a way to go for that goat. with the pieces. Woo-hoo. Woo-hoo. Woo-hoo. What a way to go for that goat. But if you're a goat, you've got to realize this is what you're here for. You're here to eat grass and get fucked up. Yeah, you're not that high on the food chain. One of these days, someone's going to find you slipping, and they're going to eat your ass. Find you slipping.

Yeah, and you guys walk. You make a lot of noise. Mountain lions have three ears. They're just going to slowly sneak up behind you bitches and someone's going to get jacked. God, you live in the ten, pretty small. You got to get out of here? I can't believe how little effort that was. So easy. To kill a cow.

A cow! Big ass cow. Grabbed him by the neck, shook it, snapped, boom. Would you rather be taken down by a lion or a crocodile? I think you want a lion because a lion's going to actually kill you. a crocodile? I think you want a lion because a lion's going to actually kill you. The crocodile will just start eating you.

And they drown you, too. They'll eat your dick first. They'll eat your dick first. That death roll. Those crocodiles love dick. They'll eat your fucking delicious dick. I think that's the thing with bears, too. Bears, they don't kill you first. They just eat your fucking delicious dick. I think that's the thing with bears, too, is that bears, they don't kill you first. They just eat you.

Because what you want to do is you want to get killed by a predator. Because predators are always – if you're getting killed by something that doesn't always kill its stuff, sometimes it eats a lot of things that it finds laying around, whether it's carrion or whether it's um berries or vegetables like bears they find just they just eat you yeah they're not concerned with killing you once they have you they have you okay they weigh 1200 fucking pounds yeah so they just start eating why kill you first i don't care if you scream good i'm trying to eat your dick they just just chew chunks of you they say that the grizzly man documentary when that guy love it yeah amazing right love it folks if you have not watched grizzly man it's one of the best unintentional comedies yeah in the history

of filmmaking it's what brought us together is it really it's kind of our love story tell me tell me when we were dating yeah i was like i don't forget but we were like we got to go to see this movie about this fucking guy that lived with bears. I remember the news story breaking. And we went and we're sitting in this theater. I think it was in Pasadena at a – A Lemley. A Lemley. So it was more of like – it was playing in like the artsy theater.

It wasn't in like the major release theaters. It was in the artsy theaters around. And we went and there was like maybe like 50 or 60 people at it. And the whole time time every like basically beat of the movie we're in hysterics like laughing and the other 50 people are not like they're all serious movie goers that like really feel for the guys we're like we have like tears our eyes lock and we're getting looks from people like we're getting looks like it's not fucking funny man

he's dead we loved it it's so funny though it's like it does a disservice to his life to pretend that he wasn't funny

yeah I agree remember the pilot the best line the pilot who would drop him off and he was like he decided he wanted to go live with bears

and I thought he was retarded yeah that's right that guy summed up that dude my favorite part was when he was walking around with his camera talking to his camera about how easy it would be if he was gay but he's not gay oh yeah he's like so obviously gay and he's walking around with his camera and he's like talking to it. I ran into some guy who his roommate, like apparently the grizzly man was in love with his roommate. And when his roommate didn't reciprocate, he trashed his apartment.

Apparently he was a bit of an angry fellow. Yeah, yeah. Like if you ever saw the video and he's screaming and yelling into the camera. Yeah. He does like a bunch of different takes. Fuck you. Fuck you, park rangers. The fuck are you doing for these pears?

Okay, I worked it out. I worked it out. Try it again. It's due to my time. And he's got this really obvious sort of femme gay voice. It's like he's got that voice. This unmistakable, stereotypical, cartoonish gay voice. He does.

And so he's walking, holding up the camera, going, well, if I was gay, I could just go to a rest stop and meet a guy. But I'm not. Dirty Treadwell's not gay. And it's the weirdest thing. This poor fucking guy. He was so torn up and confused and conflicted that he just decided to go live with bears. With bears. See if he could just get them dead.

He misread the fucking newsletter and went after real bears instead of big guys like me. It was crazy how close he got to the animals, like where the fox became his little buddy. And then remember when the bear poos? Yes. He goes, look, it's so fresh. He just came out of little buddy. The fox is here. And then remember when the bear poos? Yes. He goes, look, it's so fresh. He just came out of her butt. It's still warm. He's like touching her shit.

Wasn't the fox called like Foxy? Mrs. Cupcake. Yeah, the fox is Foxy. What was the thing? Hi, Mr. Chocolate. It also sounded so gay. Remember when the bear approached him one time? Mr. Chocolate.

A bear was approaching him, and he was like, fuck you, fuck you, or get away from me, get away i love you get the fuck away from me i love you i love you get the fuck away from me yeah like he has to oh that's right it was the reverse i love you get away from me he has to be stern with them have to be stern with them uh no you don't want to let them get in too close apparently the death video where they never got a lens on it so it's only audio because they had the cap on but the camera was running is seven minutes long.

It took him seven minutes for the bear to eat them. Oh boy. Yeah, it was him and his girlfriend. Oh right, his then girlfriend. The girlfriend hit the bear over the head with a frying pan apparently a couple times

and the bear was like, bitch. And that was a sick bear apparently. It was a sick bear? They found out like later on I remember you can look it up that I don't remember if the bear had like some type of disease. I don't know, rabies or something where it was not in a – it wasn't like a healthy, normal functioning bear.

It was hungry. Yeah. But it was because of something else. That's what I read. The problem with that is that they didn't really find much of the bear. Because they shot the bear when they flew over and they saw that the bear had killed these people. Because apparently a pilot saw the rib cage coming up. That's what he saw. And he realized that this bear was eating a person.

He saw clothes, saw a tent, saw a camp. So he knew that the bear was eating a person. So they got a guy, one of the rangers, I guess, shot him. And then when they went back, I think it was like a couple of months later, there was nothing left. It was like there was just fucking a couple pieces of bone. I thought they found them in the bear's insides. I don't know. They might have.

I mean, they might have processed the bears' guts once they killed them. It's most likely. And by no means, if you're listening, do not let this deter you from living with bears. Go for it. It should be fine. I'm addicted to all these Alaska shows, man. Oh, that's really cool. I watch all these Last Frontier shows, like Alaska, Last Frontier, and the Yukon Men.

That is crazy living man you just went hunting somewhere up north didn't you montana that's pretty cool montana doesn't give a fuck okay that place is we went down the missouri river into a place called the badlands and the badlands does not give a fuck you might as well have gone to the moon really yeah you might as well be on the moon. There's no one there. There's no cell phone signal. You ain't got shit. You got no radio. And you are in what is the bottom of a giant ancient ocean.

It used to be the great western inland sea during the Jurassic period. There was dinosaurs and shit roaming through that area. So the bottom, the ground everywhere is like silt. It's like that same slippery shit on the bottom of a lake. So you have mountains that are covered in silt. It's like that same like slippery shit on the bottom of a lake. So you have mountains that are covered in silt.

And there's, they had homesteads out there where they gave people, like if you lived there, you could claim a giant chunk of land and as long as you lived on it for a certain amount of time,

it would be your land. Well, they gave these people this land and they all left. They all quit. No one, you can't grow anything on it. It's like this crazy silty shit and there's not,

I mean, there's deer around. But, man, you've got to fucking hunt for days sometimes to kill one. Wow. So you're out there camping and trying to catch these deer and bringing them back to your family at a certain point in time. Like, look, we've got to get the fuck out of here. We're going to run out of food. And so they all did.

They all bailed. It's just not reliable. And in the wintertime, it gets way too fucking cold. It gets so cold that the river freezes. The river freezes solid. And you've got to cut holes in it and try to get fish out of there bitch good luck trying to feed yourself like that so they all bailed wow so that's where we went hunting it was fascinating that's pretty awesome it's like it was literally like going to another planet it was so humbling you know to live outside like that for five days in that kind of environment it's really really really humbling because you start to feel like – you start to see like how – first of all, how fragile you are.

Even just the temperature. Like it was 12 degrees out. We're sleeping outside. It's 12 degrees. So you're bundled up in this sleeping bag and shit and zipped over your head and trying to squeeze yourself to make your body warm. And it's 12 degrees. It's 12. And nothing gives a, my God. It's 12. And nothing gives a fuck about you.

It's just a bunch of things out there eating other things. That's all it is. It's deer eating grass, mountain lions eating deer. We found mountain lion shit, this big, thick rope of shit with fur in it. It's like, whoa, son. You're seeing this is the food chain. This is this one really harsh ecosystem yeah yeah even that survivor guy where he goes out he went to like scotland and just on the other side

of the hill like there's people living right at the moors or whatever on the other side he tries to spend the night there where people do live just out in the wild and he you know he almost freezes his dick off it's fucking cold it an un- Is this the real Survivorman or that other guy? I don't remember which one it was. Because that West guy, the guy who slept in hotels. There was a guy who slept in hotels that made it seem like he wasn't? Yeah, you didn't know that? No.

Well, first of all, the real guy is Les Stroud. Les Stroud is the real guy. He goes for 10 days now. Films it all himself. He's the real deal. He's legit. But that Bear Grylls character that dude is apparently he's some like

military guy he probably is like sort of a survival expert but when he was doing that show he was like faking a lot of shit like we just came upon a seal carcass

now we can use this for food yeah that's the guy then yeah that guy he's like he didn't really come across a seal carcass

like they put that thing there and they according to Les Les says they made Man vs. Wild because they were always trying to get him to fake shit. But he wouldn't fake shit. We had him on the podcast. He was talking about it. Oh, cool. He's like, I wouldn't fake things.

I'll listen to that. Wow. Yeah. He told me that's why they got Bear Grylls to do his show. They're like, we'll show you. We're going to do the same show. Do your own show. But we'll fake everything.

Meanwhile, everybody found out they fake things and nobody wants to watch it now. I'm going to watch some dude pretending he's sleeping in the jungle or he's going to get helicoptered into a four-star hotel and go to disco at night drinking margaritas. He's putting back there in the morning and he's like, oh, what a night. Getting massaged by spies, getting his feet massaged. Well, a night in the jungle is not pleasant. But thankfully, I can drink my own piss to stay hydrated. Don't drink ocean water, but drink plenty of urine.

I love that shit, though. I love all that stuff. I love the real shit. I don't love, I can't watch the Bear Grylls show. As soon as I found out that they were manufacturing scenarios., you know, he's just showing you I understand what they're saying They're saying he's showing you how you would survive if you came across this So let's just make this happen and have him deal with it Yeah

But he did a lot of shit that was like you would never do like really dangerous risky shit like jumping off of things like why? Is he jumping off of this? Sliding down the sides of mountains like like this This is like seems dangerous. Go sliding into an ice cave. Like why? There's nothing in there for you. Don't go in that ice cave.

You're not preserving your life. Jesus Christ, what are you doing there? Avoid that cave. Just a crazy asshole. But that's what they want you to do. If you tried to like make a Tom and Christina, your mom's house reality show, do you know how much fucking bullshit you'd have to deal with? No.

Oh, for sure. First of all, because you bullshit you'd have to deal with? Yeah. Oh, for sure. First of all, because you guys don't have a big enough name to carry it, just based on that, so they're going to have to promote it. So they're going to have to say, well, you know, Tom, look, I know you're a well-known stand-up comedian, the world of stand-up comedy, but people don't know you as an actor, okay? So we're going to need some help with this. You need to help us along with this.

We're going to get your show going. What do I need to do? What's our show, Joe? It's not all reality, okay? What is reality, okay? We're going to make some things happen. What do I need to do? Yeah, what's our show, Joe? It's not all reality, okay? What is reality, okay? We're going to make some things happen, and you just do your thing. When the thing is really happening, we're just making it happen. You're like, oh, yeah, okay, sure.

So next thing you know, you guys are in marriage counseling. You're having a fake argument, you know? There's a walrus in the backyard. And you talk, you lost your redneck. I love it. You lost your redneck. Oh, you lost your redneck. I love it. You lost your redneck. Oh, yeah. You lost your redneck.

I'd love to make that show if you're proposing. No. I'm telling you don't do it. I'm trying to tell you not to sell out. I'm selling. I'm selling. If you're buying, I'm selling. No, definitely not.

No way. Well, that's the thing about you guys having this podcast. Your podcast is perfect because nobody tells you what to do. Like all podcasts. Right. It's the best. They represent. It's the best. They really represent what the fuck you're thinking. Yeah, totally. because nobody tells you what to do like all podcasts right they really they represent they

really represent what the fuck you're thinking yeah totally it's you don't you don't lose the message and the producers or you know network notes or any any of that shit yeah it's it's really what you want it to be and that's what's cool about like the different circle of podcasts especially like ones that feel like are you know they sprung off from people that you're associated with is that each is like a representation of everybody's personality and who they are. Skeptic Tank with Ari

is so... That's who Ari is and that's what he wants the show to be. Joey Diaz is the same way. Church of What's Happening Now. Absolutely. Duncan Trussell Family. That's a total Duncan experience. Diaz is the same way. Church of What's Happening Now. Absolutely. And then I just did. Duncan Trussell Family. Absolutely.

That's a total Duncan experience. And you're getting to know the guy. And then Bert just came out with the podcast. Bert cast. I did the first episode. I should say I just sat there and laughed on the first episode because it was in Bert's place. And he had Joey Diaz and his father and me in this room

and Bert is, you know, he's steering the ship. It's what he wants it to be. That same thing. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But you just sit there listening to Diaz and Mr. Kreischer.

And it's the fucking funniest thing. I mean, I was crying. I was in tears. It was so funny. And what we do in your mom's house it's totally it's exactly what we want the show to be that's the most fun about it because it's totally yeah we're so lucky right now right did you like feel that oh this is the best time to be a stand-up comic because you don't need the big networks now if you want to do your

fucking hour you don't need to go through Comedy Central. If you want to talk to your audience, you can reach them directly through a podcast. They can download it any time, a day or night. It's the best thing. And what's really cool

about this is that people that get into a position where people are paying attention to, then they can tell you about some other cool shit. Right. It's sort of like retweeting.

Yeah. You know, like, I love retweeting because people send me some really fucking cool articles. Yeah. And I'll retweet those and like a lot of it is really interesting shit.

And there's no way you're going to accumulate all that crap on your own. You need some help out there. You do. You need some help. And that's one of the cool things about having a successful podcast is your podcast now has a big following. You could tell them, hey, watch Burt Kreischer's podcast. Listen to Burt Kreischer's podcast. And now everybody goes, oh, awesome.

And then they go, wow, I like the way Tommy thinks. Tommy makes me laugh. Christina makes me laugh. They're saying that this is a great podcast. I'll go check it out. And then it branches off and they can do that and the next person and Ari can introduce a new one. Absolutely. I mean that's the coolest thing about it is like we know so many people that are really fucking funny.

But in this day and age, before podcasting, it was really hard to get your name out there. Absolutely. Just as a stand-up. You had to have some TV credits in order to be in a club. Yeah. And even then, it takes a long time for people to take enough chances on you and word of mouth and returning to a place over and over again. To build up markets, it's a long, hard road. But now all they have to do is be funny.

And podcasting too. This was kind of an experiment for me. I spoke to you about it. I also spoke to Bill Burr, Al Madrigal about putting out an album on my own. And you guys, I'm saying separately, all encouraged me to do that. And I did it on my own, put it out. But podcasting is the thing that got really an audience for it. Yes.

You know? Yes. I put it out there, and the whole success of doing this thing on my own, where you feel kind of like like you're an entrepreneur like like i'm just gonna i'm not gonna go the the label route i'm just gonna record it and i'm gonna you know put it just do it on my own and putting it out there and then seeing if it works but seeing that the success is basically because of the audience we built from doing podcasts yeah it's a crazy connection too and don't you feel like kind of obligated to be in communication with these people

and connect with them? Absolutely. And keep making more content for them. Absolutely. And it's so cool when the stand-up now like I think the last time I saw you I was like, hey, my audience isn't there yet. They're coming now. And it makes such a difference when I look out and I can see that they

know who I am and I recognize them and I see that we have this wonderful connection and to talk to the people after and you're like this is awesome like this is what i've wanted for so long yeah we brought brian on stage in austin and they went fucking ape shit oh yeah brian got like a standing ovation going on stage in austin oh yeah and did you ever watch that interview alex jones did of us that was pretty cool yeah it us? It was pretty cool. Yeah, it was good. It was really cool. It was cool, yeah.

Alex Jones came back, and he might, may or may not, have gotten high. Oh, shit. I did. May or may not. I did Brian's little death squad tour in Ohio a couple months ago, right? A month ago? Yeah. And holy shit, when you were brought on stage, the place went fucking crazy.

Yeah, it's crazy. It's a completely different world now because of podcasts. You can literally make people famous in the real world. They walk around. It's interesting. It's cool. But it's like everything that comedy networks never were. Comedy networks were never really comedians networking.

This is like a real comedy network. Exactly. Because all of us, it's you know if i tell you go listen to joey diaz's cd and i'm crying laughing when i tell you that you can trust me go listen to that shit you know what i mean it's like we we know what ari's tastes are like you know we know what duncan's tastes are like yeah you get to know it's a rare rare time man there's never been a moment like this for for entertainers no we can just sort of do thing. You're so in connection with the audience that wants to be with you. You're connected to them.

Before, that would take a fucking pen and a pad and a letter. Jesus! You know what I mean? Yeah. I mailed this to you. And they get to know the real you, which is an interesting facet of celebrity now, I think. And I don't know if it...

It seems like in the past, celebrities had to have two lives. Like, there's your public sphere and your private. And now those two spheres are merging, and they almost have to because of this technology. Like, they. They have access to the real you. Yeah. Yeah. It's kind of cool.

I mean, obviously, there's drawbacks to that as well. If you're a douchebag. If you're a douchebag. They're going to know who you really are. Yeah. Correct. Yeah. Yeah, right?

Yeah. But I think that's ultimately where the whole world is headed, the no secrets world. I agree, and no shame world. Because this generation is growing up in public, not like we did. There's no notion anymore of keep that photograph in your locker. Now put the photograph on Facebook. Everyone's going to see your titties. Everybody's going to see everything.

Ooh, ooh. Ooh, ooh. See them titties. Put them titties in my face, girl. Yeah, it's these kids today, too. If you stop and think about how silly you were when you were 17. Oh, my God. Can you imagine how many pictures of your dick would be online? Oh, my God.

There would be chapters. There would be gigabytes of my dick online. There would be torrent There would be gigabytes of my dick. Torrents. There would be torrents of your dick. My dick would be everywhere. College courses. I would be famous for being the dumbest kid with my dick. Right.

And sending in emails. I would just upload it everywhere. I would dick roll everybody instead of Rick roll. I would release videos. The video would start out with some music, and then I would jump out with my dick. And funny ones too, though, right? With like sunglasses on your dick. I would do whatever I could to get you to look at my dick.

If I had access to that when I was 17, anonymous access, you'd all be seeing my dick. This is a fact. Get it out there. So great. Absolutely. Yeah, imagine these poor kids today anything they do any someone

photoshop makes a photoshop of them just hundreds of photoshops of me with a woman's body with a dude banging me there's a lot of them I did half of them

remember the real dolls I made of you yeah that's hilarious. Yeah. The Photoshop is amazing. Like what you can do and not do. Like sometimes you have to look at a picture and go, shop.

Like someone's being like real subtle. Fucking Mitt Romney's mom jeans photo. So good. That one is, that's Photoshop. Yeah. It's amazing. But you look at it and you're like, those jeans are really high on you. You're not sure.

So high and so tight. And they raised them up just enough to make it just questionable. It's perfect. at it and you're like those jeans are really high you're not sure i remember yeah and they raised them up just enough to make it just it's perfect i did this uh political show uh uh for for the web for comedy central i was a writer on it that kyle canane hosted like earlier this year all leading up to the election and the whole thing one one of the episodes we were like gotta use this photo of mitt romney and And we had people doing research just to make sure, like, is this photoshopped? Because it's one of those, you're like, this is so well done. You're like, no, that's not.

That's not real. But people were like, lawyers were like, is this really real? Lawyers. Yeah, you know, like network lawyers. I remember when the De La Hoya photos came out of him wearing women's clothes. Yes.

And he had experts examine them and show proof that they had been doctored. And then later he came out and said, all right, this is me. I got doing coke and dressed up like a chick. That's great. That's awesome. He didn't want to come clean with that.

I like him even more. Yeah, well, I like that he probably got that monkey off his back. They probably fucked with him for a long time. Plus, I'm sure... I like panties. What's up? That Russian chick, if she's still alive, she probably still tortures him with that.

Oh, yeah. He's probably scared. One day she's going to do interviews and shit, and he's not going to be able to pay her off anymore. Let's see the ball kicking video. Let's see that one. All right. Take it back home.

Yeah, what the fuck, man? Ball kicks. Too much. Too much. Poor Oscar. Yeah. Do you think he'd like to get ball kicked? Probably.

Just like he's beating so many dudes' asses, he wanted to beat his ass? Sure. Dressed up like a woman. Makes sense. He got tired of being like super macho man and just wanted to wear a dress and shit. Well, they say the majority of dudes that are into S&M are being submissive or lawyers and high-powered people who have to be in control in their daily lives

and then they like a good ball kicking. That makes sense. Yeah. I control everything else. I tell people what to do all the time. Wear a diaper.

Treat me like a baby. Throw pies at me. Change me. Call me Daisy. How can we save those people, folks? Is there anything we can do? Do we just accept the fact

that they're just a part of the spectrum of life? I think you have to. That or AlphaBrain. One of the two is going to work. AlphaBrain and ShroomTech together, maybe he has a chance. He immediately starts pill sprints today. It definitely is part of the spectrum.

That's the crazy thing is knowing that, like, dude. It's all normal. That's all on there, man. Everybody. What the fuck, man? What a wacky spectrum. The spectrum of human beings, you know. And behavior.

It's mind boggling. Yeah. Some dudes like to eat people. Yeah. Like that's out there. That guy that killed his gay lover recently and chopped up his ass on camera and was eating chunks of his ass. On camera.

If they only had battle ropes. Yeah, if that guy on the bottom has some jujitsu, maybe he'd fight a little position. And get to the top, the mount, take the knife away from him. Okay, now you're doing better. What a shitty way to die. Guy kills you, fucks you, and then eats your ass on TV. He's icing it up. That is a bad way. Christ. What guy kills you, fucks you, and then eats your ass on TV. God. He's slicing it up. That is a bad way.

Christ. What the fuck is with people wanting to eat people? What are you proving? I would try it, though. I'd taste it. If you were dying of starvation? Yes. Okay.

Yes. What race do you think would be the most delicious? Okay, let's talk about this. She thought about it. Well, let's see. Okay, because I know in sushi I like fatty tuna the most because it's a nice fatty piece. So white people right now are pretty fatty. White American.

I'm going to go corn-fed Iowa woman in the airport that looks like Sam Kinison, fat lady. I think that would be – woman in the airport looks like Sam Kinison. There are women who look just like Sam Kinison. That would be good, but the fattiness would be more like a pork, I think. It's like pork belly. Yeah, I don't think it'd be like tuna at all. Like not the fatty tuna? Well, even when tunas are slightly fatty, like the bottom area, that's lean as fuck

compared to almost every other organism on the planet. Still pretty muscular. Yeah, you want to look at a human? Humans are gross. Probably like a cis. A pork rind? I like pork rinds. Yeah.

No, more like a roast. Okay. Like a fat, sloppy pork roast where the meat's just falling off because it's all made out of Cheetos and shit. The only nutrition it has is soda. I'll take a kind of fat black guy, you know? Oh, exotic. With black beans and rice. I like to have some hot sauce.

I think the black guys are pretty naturally muscular, so I take one that's kind of fat, so I get a nice mixture of like, it's like a ribeye. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I get marbled. Marbled. Marbled, but not crazy. Right. Yeah, and probably it's the darker meat, too.

It's probably more nutritious. I'd go Indian because it's already seasoned. That's a good point. That's a very good point. But not a lot of meat on those. Not a lot of meat on those Not a lot of meat on those Yeah, it's probably With all that curry

They say that like pineapple flavors your loads Right So I'm sure curry would flavor your rump That's right Let's do it Curry in armpit Yeah, you got curry in your fats Well, that's the case with bears

You know, with bears You want to eat a bear that gets shot After it eats a lot of blueberries The bears that like If you eat bears Apparently it's like Some of the most delicious meat you can have. Really? Yeah, because it literally changes the way their flesh tastes.

And their fat. Their fat has all this blueberry in the fat. Oh, that's delicious. It's really nutty. Let's do a trip. Let's go kill a bear. What about you, Joe? What's your racial choice? Probably Asians. It's obvious. How come?

I just know Joe's type is either brazilian or asians yeah probably probably would have like asians aren't known for being the most muscular probably a good get a good cut yeah did you ever hear about that one guy from japan who uh murdered a girl cooked her and ate her and then got off like on some insanity some insanity case. So he was only incarcerated for a small amount of time. Did he keep some of her for a long time, like in a closet or something? Yeah, I don't know. That's a good question.

Something along the lines. I forget the guy's name, but he was famous for it. Yoshi Obayashi. How dare you? That's not true. That guy, I'll pull it up. Japanese camera. Give the guy a break, man.

He did a bad thing. Well, she probably did something wrong, right? She probably said some shit she shouldn't have said. Yeah, she's talked a lot of shit. This is his name, Isai Sagawa. Yeah. It's pretty fucking crazy. Apparently, this dude has described openly. In 1981, he murdered and cannibalized a Dutch woman named Renée Hartevelt.

And after his release, he became a minor celebrity in Japan, making a living through public interest in his crime. Wow. He served time in a French jail. Oh, the French let him out. Huh. How long did he serve? Like, listen, he has suffered enough. All he did is eat one American.

Yeah. He is under five feet tall, and he felt like he was weak and inadequate, and he ate her because he wanted to absorb her energy. That's a good reason. That is a good reason. He fainted at the shock of shooting her, but awoke with the realization that he had to carry out his desire to eat her. He did so beginning with her buttocks and thighs after having sex with her corpse. In interviews, he noted his surprise that the corn-colored nature of human fat.

For two days, Sagawa ate various parts of her body. He described the meat as soft and odorless, like tuna. What? Wow. That shit's crazy. You fucking nailed it. Hey, nailed that flavor. You're a natural cannibal.

Thank you. I think this is an in-shape girl, though. There you go. I think this wasn't a fatty. She wasn't a fatty. I don't think he was eating someone for their pork-like deliciousness. Sam Kinison-like deliciousness. pork-like consistency.

Sam Kinison-like deliciousness. He then attempted to dump the mutilated body in a remote lake but was seen in the act and later arrested

by the French police who found parts of the deceased still in his refrigerator. Oh my God. There we go. His wealthy father provided a top lawyer

for his defense and after being held for two years without trial in a French jail, the blah, blah, blah found him legally insane and unfit to stand trial and ordered him to be held indefinitely in a mental institution. Good call.

How long did he... That's a good ruling. He spent over three months there and then he went home. Yeah, how did they let him out? Jesus Christ. Okay, the Japanese authorities found it legally impossible to hold him because the French government refused to release court documents, which remain a secret to Japan, claiming that the case was already dropped in France. So as a result, wow.

They extradited him to Japan, and when they let him in Japan, Japan just let him go. Oh, geez. It's funny how that always happens between, like, when somebody from a country gets caught for something in another country, there's always, like, this irrational just, we just want them. And don't punish them. Listen to how crazy this is. Upon his arrival in Japan, he was immediately taken to the Matsuzawa Hospital, where examining psychologists all found him to be sane, stating that sexual perversion was the sole motivation for the murder. That sounds like a sadistic, evil motherfucker then, right? Yeah. However, the Japanese authorities found it legally impossible to hold him

because the French government refused to release the documents. So they said that this guy was just depraved. He was totally sane, depraved, and just sexual perversion was the reason why he killed this chick. He kills one, and then he makes a living as a minor celebrity. He's invited as a guest speaker on TV shows and shit. He pretends to eat people. That's crazy. He mocks biting people.

That's like if Ted Bundy was doing talk shows. He wrote books about the murder. He wrote books about it and describing it in great detail. Wow. Jesus Christ man This is incredible Japanese are so different I know

That culture is Brian out of all the places That we've ever been to Wasn't that the one That most felt like We were on another planet Oh yeah it was great I can't wait to go back

But wasn't it like Taiwan It really felt Thailand It really felt like You were in Like another planet It's felt like you were in another planet. It's like you're in Blade Runner or something. Really?

They just got hit again with another earthquake. 7.2, yeah. I didn't know that. I didn't know that. It's looking ugly. It's looking ugly for the Japanese. That sucks. I'm dying to visit.

I really want to take a trip one day. It's a tough spot, man. I want to go to Japan. Being on an island that's that's got regular volcanic and earthquake activity like that and after that big tsunami like the reality of that all setting in that's a tough spot to live yeah it's not that big either you know how big is it is a small smaller than texas right small must be i think texas is an unbelievable amount of people too yeah especially tokyo you know yeah shit and it's seen it's it's

such a modern city too it's really interesting like they're they're buildings and i love their writing like seeing their writing all illuminated and shit it really does look like some alien shit it's fascinating culture yeah yeah well they're not so good though you gotta get out of here yeah i gotta get out of here powerful brian red band is out of here ladies and gentlemen he's got a bolt and you guys gotta leave yeah let right? Yeah, we gotta go. Let's just wrap this bitch up. If anybody wants to follow Christina Pazitsky all up in this bitch,

you can follow her at Christina with a C. Not one of those freaks that spells it with a K. Yeah. C-H. C-H. Christina P. on Twitter. And of course, Tom Segura is Tom. S-E-G-U-R-A. Holla at your boy.

I have the CDs of both of these. Tommy's new CD is White Girls with Cornrows. It's amazing. It is amazing. Tommy, you've been killing it on the road. I've been hearing. We've been talking about it on the podcast. I keep hearing it over and over again.

People that tell me they went to your shows. I get messages on Twitter like, holy shit, Tom killed it. He's fucking awesome. That's awesome. Thank you. You're to your shows, I get messages on Twitter like, holy shit, Tom killed it. He's fucking awesome. That's awesome. Thank you. You're getting your due, man. Thank you for all the Joe Rogan fans that I get to meet that come to shows are phenomenal. Thank you for supporting.

It's really awesome. Well, I've been saying this for a while, man. You're one of the most unappreciated stand-ups in the country right now. I really believe that. Nice guy, man. It's true. I really believe that. You're one of the top guys.

All right. That's it for the podcast, you dirty fucks. Thanks for having us. Thank you, Joe. Thanks for being on. Thanks for having us. It's true. Thank you. I really believe that. You're like one of the top guys. All right. That's it for the podcast, you dirty fucks. Thanks for having us. Thank you, Joe. Thanks for being on. Thanks for having us. Thanks to Ting. Go to rogan.ting.com.

Get 50 bucks off some groovy shit. Go to onnit.com. O-N-N-I-T. Use the code name ROGAN. Save yourself 10% off any and all supplements. And go fuck yourself. There you go. But know this. It's good. It's good. Go fuck yourself. But know this.

It's good. It's good. Go fuck yourself. It's good. Life is good. It's good to fuck. It's good to do everything. Just do it all with love, you dirty fucks.

And we will see you tomorrow. Tomorrow with Mix Master Mike of the Beastie Boys. Beastie Boys. And Russell Peters. And powerful Russell Peters. Together? Yes. And then Wednesday, the great Dom Irera will join us.

And Sunday, Dennis McKenna, the brother of Terrence McKenna, will regale us with stories of psychedelic adventures. And we'll be promoting his new book. So, all right. Thank you, everybody, for tuning in and listening. And thanks for all the positive messages and all the love out there. The amount of happy and positive people that I run into online and in real life as opposed to not happy people is fucking staggering.

It's the most incredible group of people that we run into at these shows and online. It's amazing. I don't know what we did to deserve it, but thank you very much and know this. We appreciate the shit out of it and we're never going to forget and we're never going to stop doing this.

All right, so we'll see you soon. Bye. Go fuck yourself suck it suck it