The Joe Rogan Experience - #387 - Everlast

Episode Date: August 28, 2013

Everlast is an American singer-songwriter known for hits such as "What It's Like" and "Put Your Lights On" and was a founding member of House of Pain.

Everlast is here ladies and gentlemen. You know, am I wrong thinking Robert Shapiro started that or was he just an early like spokesman? Is that true? I don't know. Let's look that up. I don't, I don't, I have this sense that either he was an early spokesman or he might have started it. Wow. Wow, that's a smart move. Yeah. Yeah, but that's one of those things where you go, ooh. Hmm.

Hmm. Do I want to be, uh, do I want to be connected with Homeboy? What does Mark Furman do these days that'd be funny to find out like where people are like that are you know that like notorious like people are yeah let's see it says jump to legal zoom here i guess he he had something to do with it shapiro is one of the co-founders of legal awesome yeah wow look at everlast deep inside the the system understanding all the behind the scenes i just haven't smoked up that part of the brain I thought so. Wow. Look at Everlast. Deep inside the system. Understanding all the behind the scenes shit.

I just haven't smoked up that part of the brain yet, dog. That's all. That's all. There was still a little Shapiro knowledge left there somehow. Eat some fresh fruits and vegetables. I'm still living like the car chase is going on. Like, go OJ. Go OJ.

I'm living in the 90s, brother. Hit the music. I already did. Is that it? So it's officially started? Yeah. Okay, good enough. We don't need all the music.

Fuck, we're going to have plenty of music in this podcast. We don't really need the opening song. Yeah, that OJ thing is one of the weirdest times in my life because I was a very young man, and I was still really delusional about the way the world worked. I really had no idea. I didn't know like to the extent of corruption and craziness and the the the fucking dispute between like when rodney

king happened and i saw like how strong the hate for police is in the the the the the anger that led to the rioting i was like who the fuck saw that coming who thought that i was so delusional like i had such little contact with that world that i had no idea what the disparity was like how these people felt about about police brutality and things like that do you see that video of them beating the shit out of that dude with sticks and then they got off and everybody's like whoa wait a minute you're like what how that What's going? What happened here exactly? Okay, he was on what? Okay, so he's on, he's on like angel dust,

so he doesn't feel it. Is that what's happening here? Do they have something they can, can they hold on to him? Like, can you, it's five guys. Can't they wrestle this dude to the ground? Like, it seems like,

it seems like they're having a good time beating the shit out of him. Well, I mean, that's the myth of like, or not the myth, but the grand thing about, you know, yeah, angel dust, that's the one thing they say. Like, you know,

people are broken out of handcuffs. Yeah. If that's the case, people the grand thing about, you know, yeah, Angel Dust, that's the one thing they say. Like, you know, people are broken out of handcuffs. Yeah. If that's the case, people need to revisit that fucking, that one particular issue. Because Angel, I had a friend who had his finger bitten off. Man,

it wasn't. That was just the straw, dude. You know what I mean? That was just the straw. The camel's back was damn near snapped at that point. I was living on that side of the world. I was like part of Ice-T's,

Ryan Sinekid. I was running through. That's so weird. It was was like i knew the hatred for the police was was that was like i was i was you know normal what was it like rolling around with those guys you know what the thing was is like in a weird way i was just so oblivious to it that i you know because i was treated as you know like i was a member of the crew right i was already like one of them rap kid and it was like you know i you know as long as i showed up had the balls to be somewhere i felt like i was cool there you know i mean i was like all right i was i never i wasn't into gangbang and everything i was never flagging anywhere i was you know but and i was you know and i was you know knew a few key people that would be like oh yeah

oh he knows that dude all right dude i was, I was a huge Ice-T fan. I used to get told by cats like Ice would say things like, yeah, man, you're white, man. Everybody here either thinks you're crazy for being here or you're a cop. So you're good. I was making him fuck tonight. That was one.

Yeah, well, you know what, man? His best shit. Well, I think Colors is one of his best songs ever. That is one of the best songs ever that is one of the best like theme songs for a movie ever representative of what was going on in that movie that that that song just fucking nailed it that was right place right time right dude you know whoever picked him for that it was the right you know they everybody made the right decision it's the rap version of Live and Let Die.

That's a good song. Live and Let Die is a theme song for a movie, right? But it's a badass fucking song. I mean, da-da-da, da-da-da, da-da. Was that its original purpose? Was that its original purpose? It was a theme for a movie? I believe Paul McCartney made it for the movie.

Unless it was just a fucking coincidence that he had a song called Live and Let Die, and it was a 007 movie. Let's see. Okay, let's find out. We need to find out. Paul McCartney. Weird. Are you a fan of Paul McCartney?

I mean, as a songwriter, how could you not be? Right. I mean, the guy's written a lot of amazing songs. You know, you aspire to write that many well-known songs, you know. He was a beast. You know, I mean, I think there's like, because he seemed like such a nice guy. I think like some more hardcore people don't give that guy the credit he deserves. Like for me, like if you look at the Beatles, you break them down. It's like John Lennon wrote the more ethereal kind of weirdo kind of songs.

Or like more government-related, protest-y kind of stuff. Paul McCartney wrote the stuff about love and life and everyday things, you know what I mean? And like turned them into poetry kind of thing. You know, that's, you know, I think I love them both in different ways. Me too, I'm perfectly sad.

He was commissioned specifically for this movie and credited to McCartney and his wife Linda. It reunited the former Beatles producer George Martin who both produced a song and arranged the orchestral break it was all done for for that movie it's like one of the most successful like movie theme songs ever because it was a real song yeah and then Guns N' Roses yeah we cut it yeah so 10 million records I mean that's a fucking badass song for your theme song. Your movie's making $100 million no matter what,

just with that song on it. It can't go wrong. And then Band on the Run, that's a crazy song. That's like two songs in one. You listen to the beginning of it, and then when the rain exploded with a mighty crash as we fell into the sun god damn paul mccartney i mean that's a beautiful fucking song it's a work of art and good drugs oh fuck yeah

he'd seen everything there is to say he saw the full mandala saw that happen as he fell into the sun he saw that happen well the rain exploded with a mighty crash as we fell into the sun he saw that happen well the rain exploded with a mighty crash as we fell into the sun damn you know he had to have seen all that that's some old i can hear the colors i can hear the colors man you can't write something like that unless you've seen something like that you can't fake that lyric the rain exploded with a mighty crash as we fell into the Sun what the fuck the first one said to the second one there I hope you're having fun that is as psychedelic as a lyric ever can get without being like ponderous you know what I mean without being like blatantly obvious you're trying to be like trippy

like that is just there's that's a perfect lyric well the rain exploded with a mighty crash as we fell into the sun. And the first one said to the second one there, I hope you're having fun. What kind of shit are you on, son? Acid. For real. It has to be, right? Heavy doses of it. It's such a trippy lyric.

He was so, that band was so instrumental in opening people's minds to the ideas of altered states of consciousness. Because they were so into like meditation and, you know, there was always hanging out with weird gurus and shit. They were freaky dudes, man. And they started off like these really sweet guys from England with cute haircuts making girls scream. And then somewhere along they morphed into this like spiritual injection machine. You know, like if you go like to the white album like some like you if you became a fan of the beatles you became a fan of like very strange alternate ways of thinking you know yeah you saw at the time yeah i mean if you if you were

a fan morphing with them yeah you had to be pretty open-minded. Yeah, you know. But luckily, the music was just really good, so it helped a lot. Well, I think that to be that good, you have to be crazy. You can say some really, really stupid shit on a bed of music that sounds good. I mean, and that proof is all around us today. Yeah. All around us. All around us. Always will be.

But I think to be that good, you have to get crazy. And I think they got crazy. They just went everywhere. They just went with it. And there's no way, you know, you can't. That's not a regular dude. A regular dude's not going to make that song. It's literally not possible.

Like, the mind does not work that way. You got to be some crazy dude out there wearing robes, hanging out with dudes in Tibet. For real. You got to really be doing it. And be a perfectionist. You got to have gurus and shit. some crazy dude out there wearing robes, hanging out with dudes in Tibet. For real. Oh, yeah, sitars. Bong, bong. And be a perfectionist. You got to have gurus and shit,

Indian dudes with white beards, and they tell you freaky shit. Also, the cats didn't have the benefits of computer technology, man. They had to be good at all of the shit they were doing. Yeah, totally true. Yeah, nowadays, a guy could grab this guitar, completely true. Now, dude, there's a guy who could grab this guitar completely out of tune,

like strum it on it a little bit and literally in the box make it sound like he was doing something. Do you think that that cheapens music or does it just give an artist more tools? Is it obvious what cheapens it? I think it could do either. It's a double-edged sword.

But when it's just used like to blatantly like suck the light we talk about something like you know like we'll hit we'll listen to old records that were like sampled and made into hip-hop records like you know but before i we go on i like to listen to a lot of old music when we play so we'll listen to the old versions of stuff and then we'll put on new versions and new versions even though they're sampled or using pieces of that old version, they don't have the grease because it's not alive. There's not five guys locking up, playing it. It's like a machine, here's a piece, piece, piece, and then we repeat that piece, piece, piece, and then we repeat that piece, piece, piece. It sucks the life out of things sometimes.

It's good for club music, if you're just making drum machine club music. Tiestos type shit. Or hip hop. It sounds good in clubs, Like, you know, it sounds good in clubs, but it's not, you know, it's not really, it doesn't have no grease. You know?

The first time I ever saw a rapper in a club was in Mexico. I saw Ludacris perform in Mexico. He was like an hour late. You know? Oh, that's early.

That's early for a rapper. Everybody's like waiting for the show to start. But damn, man, when he did it, and it was complete short attention span rap. He never really finished a rap. He just went from one rap to the other and shortened the songs up. And I was like, that's kind of crazy.

I'm like, how often do they do that? And my friend was like, they always do that at hip-hop shows. And I go, why? And he goes, they just don't want to give anybody any breaks. No chance to think that things are calming down. No chance. Just go, go, why? And he goes, they just don't want to give anybody any breaks. No chance to think that things are calming down. No chance. Just go, go, go. They're like, it's a different environment than playing a record.

Plus, you never know when you play clubs, when it's just all going to go wrong anyways. You want to get the bulk of your set in so you know you're getting paid. Well, is that the case in rap shows in general? No, it's just like that's the energy of a rap show. It's different. You've got rappers and certain cats that use bands now, but when you go and you see a show that has a band,

there's things to see and watch and wonder about, and like, wow, that sound, and these guys are all doing crazy things. But when it's just a DJ and a rapper, that can get boring real quick just watching it. So yeah, they just got to hit you and hit you and hit you and hit you. It's medley time is really what it is. It's all about the medley in hip-hop. And plus, it's like a ringtone generation.

So most of them only know the song up until the ringtone cuts off. Wow. What does that say about us? I serious but it's true look i mean that's you get about a minute and a half or something i think whatever a minute of a ringtone you know that's that's basically what they when you i occasionally dj like a club here and there in vegas when you know when when they throw out a couple dollars and i say i'm bored enough and it's because i think it's fun but i don't think I ever get out of the first verse of a record well very rarely and it's usually a classic like Dr. Dre you know uh next episode or something like that or you know jump around or you know not to you know to my horn I'm just saying it's usually a classic record like that

you can get away with playing a few verses of otherwise it's just like kind of like one hook one verse one hook one let's get out and get to the next thing because it's that's the dance they want to dance they want to move they want to just always be like oh they always want to be like the next song came on yeah the party's got to be beginning like every five minutes so it's different than than doing your songs just in a in a live session like you do a totally different acoustic show i take my motherfucking sweet time about it man and i and i'll you know i might even start mumbling while I drink whiskey and wind up telling a story I never meant to tell in the first place or something. Right. It's a different thing.

What do you like better? Rap shows are fun. I did plenty of them, but I enjoy what I do. I like playing music. I like locking in with people and other musicians and us creating. They play my songs the way they should be played. But if you listen enough, different things happen every night. And we're all fitting in with different, you know, without changing the song,

there's things going on that I'll be like, oh, I saw what you did right there. Or we'll all just black out and zone in some other place. And it's transcendental. Is that the right word? Or transcendent. Transcendent. I mean, you just kind of, it's the energy of the music. I like that a little bit better.

Hip hop, the energy is kind of a steady, heavily angry. Even when it's like trying to be slowed down in love songs, they're like heavily angry towards the women they're talking about. As long as my bitches love me, bitches love me, bitches love me. It's like, okay, I mean, I'm sitting here and I have that on in the car and I'm like, oh, this is a funny, cool song. I like it. It's cool. But it's like when I think about it, it's like, if I would have like sang that to like, abroad,

as long as my bitches love me. Bitches. I don't know. Who knows? Maybe then I would sell 10 million records. I don't know. Maybe that should be

my next effort. Maybe you're just too happy and successful. Maybe you need to tune in to pissed off people that are fucking... I'm pretty pissed off. Yeah,

that aggression of rap music is like, I i mean it's like no there's never been an art form where people bragged about like killing people and killing the police and like you know just running around making millions of dollars on cocaine didn't blues do that a little bit of johnny cash punk rock man there was some punk rock shit that was pretty out there that's true well i was never exposed to that. I, for whatever reason, never had any desire to listen to any punk rock. I always, I mean, it's totally prejudice, but I always associated everybody who was like a punk rock lover with like misplaced anger.

And I was like, just, I don't have time for this. I got to get away. Like, for real. I've never listened. And it's totally ignorant. I completely agree. I mean, like, admit it. You never listened to like The Clash or any of that kind of stuff?

Yeah, I guess. Is that punk? Rock the Casbah? Is that punk? Well, there's arguments that that's their most pop stuff, you know. I just thought it was great music. It was. I mean, London Calling.

Yeah. You know, but lots of songs like The Guns of Brixton and all kinds of stuff about. I mean, what is punk, though? I don't understand it. I just associated it with people with their hair all spiked up and looking to stomp around and shit. I feel like punk is like a DIY thing. It's like the sentiment, you're going to put that out there before you even know how to play. You're just like, hey, look, I want to do a song.

I can't play like all those guitar gods back in the day. So instead, I'm going to just plug in turn up and like i know two so two chords hey here's a song that's it is that really all punk is that's all it is so it's bullshit it's bullshit it's a it's bullshit with like balls bullshit with balls and like like the mentality you know because like they couldn't play as good the purest american music yeah well actually you know because it kind of started i think some people argue it started in england but is well yeah the attitude of the of bullshit with balls yes that's that's that's that's why it's so american it's so beautiful is that american music or a lot of people turn it into into art too you

know i mean right like you know i mean black flag which is produced henry rollins and all cats like that you know and you know i mean then there's you got there's the spectrum is wide too because there's people like gg allen used to call gg allen that's not even like that's that's like shit on people that was just like he'd come in and throw himself through a glass window and take a shit on stage eat some and then bust his head open with the microphone it wasn't even about the music but it was punk rock you know punk is like an umbrella you know it's like hip-hop you know there's like art punk art punk fashion so it's an expression of rebellion and admitting that you're or accepting and and sort of being enthusiastic about the fact that you're rebelling against the system i was from the burbs so i took it as a bunch of like angry burbs kids that couldn't like do shit and express

anything so instead they just like you know it's just like anger like what you said misplaced anger but it seeps into politics and right right right right yeah yeah punk is a weird thing see i wasn't really a part of punk as a scene when it was happening. I learned about it later. You know what I mean? So I look at it from a standpoint of the bands, not the fans. You know what I mean? There was a lot of smart bands, you know, Fugazi and stuff like that.

Yeah, man. The whole DC scene. Bad Brains is responsible for half of the hardcore music. Do you like hardcore bands? I'll guarantee you any of them somewhere. So if not them, whoever influenced them was influenced by Bad Brains. Bad Brains was the first band to play fast. That fast punk sound.

Black people invented that. But could play. And they were like reggae-looking Rastafari dudes playing hardcore punk music. It was ill. Is Suicidal Tendencies, is that punk? Yes. Okay, well, I love those dudes. Yes. That song, Bring Me Down, well, I love those dudes.

That song, Bring Me Down, You Can't Bring Me Down, God damn, is that a good workout song. There's good music. That's an aggressive fucking song. There's a ton of just whatever, but there's some really good stuff out there, punk rock music, old punk rock. Punk doesn't even exist anymore, really. Anything that calls itself punk now is kind of just like a marketing ploy.

Oh, really? Or trying to be what punk once was, in my opinion. But if you're doing blues, are you trying to be what blues once was? Absolutely. Everybody is. Absolutely. So it's not just a form of expression? I mean, that's like saying, okay, if I try to make blues, am I really fucking like some Delta fucking cotton picker?

Fucking no. I'm emulating something you know but but you're a dude who's lived but I'm just saying it's like you got to at the purest form of what that music and where it came from it's like no I'm not that guy that invented you know I didn't write that I'm just saying it's a formula that was there long before me and I'm just kind of using it to express myself you know what I mean yeah but it's still you're doing blues you know and punk and it's and it's and it's when it was happening was an original thing it hadn't been seen or done before and why can't they still do punk they do i'm just saying it's not you can still i ain't seen i ain't seen nothing

that was that i put it this way i ain't seen nothing new punk rock right everything that calls itself punk rock is like kind of a retro version of what used to be punk rock right you know but i'll tell you the most punk rock thing i've seen in a long long fucking time i watched the guys asked no no no no no no i watched a fucking documentary on those pussy riot chicks oh those bitches are crazy they are gangsters they are gangsters man in the courts and right in the face of the russian government them broads stood tall yeah i'm like yo whatever you want to feel about them you I think what they should, all that shit was just, you know, that's gangster. They said something. They did it.

They stood for it. They didn't even fold up. It's pretty gangster. It was crazy. I was like, wow. You know, at a certain point in time, you have to realize that these things that you're calling churches are weird patterns of behavior that were established by people thousands of years ago. And they have literally nothing to do with God. If there is a God, without a doubt, it has nothing to do with the bizarre behavior of these people that are claiming to represent him. And no one person can be represented by God or

whatever the idea of God is better than you can. We're all supposedly in this together. And as soon as you have leaders and people who are in charge of organizations with very specific rules, you've missed the boat completely you know you're you're you're in some weird cultish sort of a thing that's just what the fuck it is you know people don't want to say that they don't want to believe that but that's just what the fuck it is you know so when you when you limit people like that and you you box them up like that it's a it's a dangerous thing it's always going to be a dangerous thing it's always going to be a dangerous thing to control people

Like you can't you get it people gotta just be nice to each other You can't be like the eventually we're gonna figure out these borders are bullshit Eventually, we're gonna look at all the borders all over the program go. Whoa. Whoa. Why the fuck can why can't we just go over there? Why can't anybody go wherever the fuck they want? Would that force everybody to even out the economic situation of the world if people could just completely travel freely? One of the reasons why you can have ghettos is because you can keep them there. If people could just go wherever the fuck they wanted to go,

they would just go wherever the money is. People from Mexico would just start walking into America, and then you're going to have to deal with that. You're going to have to deal with the fact that you're connected to a third world country. And people from Canada are going to have our assholes sneaking into their borders, and they're going to go, okay, we've got to tighten with the fact that you connected to a third world country and people from Canada are gonna have our assholes sneaking into their borders and they go okay we got a tighten down the fucking fences here what's going on we got these crazy asshole Americans Canada's fences are pretty tight buddy they are right now right now they open it up I caught a gun charge in 1992 I'd like just started getting in again like this. What did you have to do to get in?

Jump through some hoops. Pay some money. I had a friend who got pulled over for a gun, and it wasn't even illegal. He was legally in possession of a gun. And every time he goes to Canada, they pull him into that room, and they sit him down. They ask him 100 questions. They don't take kindly. But if you would have got caught with 10 pounds of weed, they don't trip that hard.

Go ahead. 10 pounds. Go ahead up in. We that hard. Go ahead. 10 pounds. Go ahead up in. We're not worried about that. Can you even smoke that much weed before it goes bad? Sure. Can you? 10 pounds of weed.

Die trying. How many years is that of weed? That's a few years of weed, right? It's got to be. Three weeks for wrapping, man. It's got to be unless you're just crazy. Joey Diaz could smoke a pound a year. More than that.

I'm trying to figure. Yeah. How much is a pound? I'm thinking of like an ounce 16 ounces And then I'm thinking of 16 ounces in a pound That's not that much That's 160 ounces You could smoke that in a few months

If you were going Joey Diaz style I've never even held a pound yet Neither have I I don't want to be around a pound If you're around a pound You're around 15 Nowadays Like an ounce nowadays

Would probably last me a couple months. Back in the day, it would have been about a week. To the head, just for me. A pound? No, an ounce. It would have took me 160 weeks to smoke 10 pounds. I probably did that.

I probably smoked 10 pounds in 160 weeks. That makes sense. 52 weeks a year. That makes sense. I can do an ounce a month. That totally makes sense. 52 weeks a year. I can do it. That makes sense. I can do an ounce a month. Yeah, that totally makes sense. Wow, that's really brilliant calculations, actually. That sounds like some serious weed economics. You broke it down probably exactly.

There's no exaggeration in that. There was no hyperbole. No, because it was part of the money. I was like, this week is all right, 400 for an ounce of weed. Every week. That was every week. That was like my loan shark almost thing. Because sometimes I'd go in and be like, give me three and I'll get you next week. And so you had to be steady with it.

Do you see the changes that are happening right now with weed? Well, we just did a thing in Seattle called Hemp Fest. And it is wide the fuck open up there dog now we went to a what was it called a dab bar yeah dabs what is a dab bar where they do like do the uh waxy like bong hit shit but it was like an open bar open like open like to the public oh they're so crazy is that a picture of it, it was like along the waterfront, a three-mile-long festival. Cops were handing out Doritos and shit. Oh, yeah, my friend Voodoo Chicken told me about that.

What is that? It was sitting in the dressing room, about 50 joints. Oh, my God. That's a lot of pot. Hemp fest. Dude, you showed me a picture of a doorknob. It looks like a doorknob. Look at it.

All those joints, it looks like a doorknob. That would be actually a cool doorknob. We've take a photo of that and recreate it perfectly It's a lot of fucking joints what's a big like tin of joints and it looks like a doorknob sitting on a door The pictures unusual because there's a wooden door that looks like, it's like the table looks like a wooden door. So there's a box on it. It looks like a doorknob. It's a lot of goddamn joints. Yeah, I would get nervous. I'd run out of the room if you had that.

I'd be like, that's too much. We're going to get busted for selling. That's like if you have more than a certain amount. They were just slinging weed all around. They give zero fucks up in Seattle. Seattle's a beautiful place. I love it up there. It's one of my favorite cities ever.

They have to deal with some shit because of the stinky weather in the winter, but at least the roads don't really ice up. I think they're just cool with anything that's going to keep motherfuckers from jumping out windows and shit. Well, they're also really smart up there. It's a real smart city, like per capita. Very unusually smart.

Very creative. Isn't it still one of the higher suicide rates? Oh, yeah. Just because of the weather and whatnot without a doubt yeah without a doubt does not make you happy it's not making happy great a lot yeah a lot a lot but that shit builds character yeah crankiness it builds character drugs nah not necessarily might make you just a little more expressive i don't know if you felt trapped in it, though, man. That's true. Guys like you and me, we could always be like, fuck this. I'm going to San Diego.

Or I'm going to Hawaii. Going to Hawaii for a week. Yeah, I'm out. Yeah, you could do that. And people who live there, they say if you can schedule a vacation, you go in the winter. And you go somewhere where it's sunny, period. You don't do anything goofy. You don't go somewhere that's shittier than where you're at.

You don't go somewhere cold. You go to the beach, bitch. That's what you do. I never thought of it that way. Like, that would be cool to have, like, live in Seattle and then just get the fuck out of there if you get too fucking sad. It would totally be cool. Look, it'd be cool to live in Seattle, period.

I think you'd deal with the rain because it's such a dope city. The folks are good up there, man. It's a very artistic city. Like, it doesn't seem like a city that has a lot of chains you know when you're driving through you see like a lot of individual restaurants and individual stores you see a lot of uniqueness to seattle you know and i think that's one of the reasons why the music scene out of seattle and jimmy motherfucking hendrix came from seattle respect yeah okay you know i mean everybody knows nirvana came from seattle but. Okay? You know? I mean, everybody knows Nirvana came from Seattle. But is it like that anymore?

I don't know, but that's the environment that created those people. Yeah, definitely. You know what I'm saying? There's an intensely creative environment that created Nirvana. I mean, that band was intensely creative. You know?

That song, Rape Me? Like, holy shit. Like, that whole sub-pop records scene, they were pretty good. Okay, What kind of music were they? That was all that stuff What would you call that? Grunge They called it

Grunge It was just rock and roll They would have just Called it rock and roll Or punk Post punk hardcore They started off punk They started off punk

Yeah Wow Yeah they were fucking Because there was a Hardcore music movement They called it hardcore After punk towards the end I'll never forget How I found out about Nirvana.

I was over at this dude's house that I used to buy stolen radios from. There was this one dude. If you needed a radio back then when I didn't understand karma, you needed a radio from your car, you can get one from this kid who always had radios that he would just somehow or another get. And you didn't ask any questions, but you knew they were stolen. But we were over at his house, and he was into music, this kid. It was just a bad kid, you know, whatever bad suburban kid Yeah, not too bad. We went over his house and he goes this is gonna change music and I said, what is it?

He goes it's called fucking Nirvana and he starts playing it and he goes all those hair bands Those guys are fucked and he played this shit I was like wow like you just nailed it like this kid nailed it in his in his bedroom in Newton, Massachusetts Like right when the the nevermind came out This kid nailed it. He just was an amuses a radio thief It's like this is this is gonna change this those guys are fucked. It was that obvious though was that It was that obvious. Danny Boy played it for me first. I was like, and we were both like, just jaws dropped. There's only been a few times in musical history when someone hits some new level of something

where you've never seen it before. And when Nirvana came out, that was like, whoa. Undeniable talent. Yeah. Just undeniable uniqueness. The power of their song. Song after song, different. Honest, though. Yeah. uniqueness, the power of their song, song after song different. Honest, though.

Yeah. Oh, totally honest. Super honest. Raw in like this insane heroin way, you know, this insane heroin honesty. Spawned by the punk movement. Yeah. Is that what it is? What about Alice in Chains?

Alice in Chains, they were kind of like that. They were more on the metal side to me, but like they were definitely of that grungish metal movement. Dude. Like Soundgarden, you know, they they were definitely of that grungish metal movement. Dude. Like Soundgarden, they rocked out a little harder. That song, Them Bones. Yeah.

Jesus Christ. That makes you feel like you're dying when you're listening to it. Yeah. Jerry Cantrell's a beast, man. Yeah. That was a dude who was- Very sad. That motherfucker understood that he was dying when he wrote that song. He understood that he was on that path when he wrote that song.

I don't think Lane wrote those he just sang it yeah I think Jerry Cantrell wrote all that stuff Wow well I'm pretty sure whatever there may be a few that I'm wrong on but at the bulk and to perform that what I'm saying is like the way Lane Staley hit notes like it made you like it made you feel that you were dying like that song gonna end up a big old pile of them bones like that screaming was like jesus christ i remember the first time i saw man in the box like on mtv it was like what the hell is that god damn those guys were intense that was crazy and that that kind of i had a night with that dude and another guy. Lane Staley? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Slept with him? Yeah, I did.

It was good, too. No, we... Just for the story. This promoter in Philly booked this place. I believe it was the Electric Factory. Like, you know, a thousand-seater club, something like that. He booked it twice in one night. He did two shows.

He did an Alice in Chains show early. Wow. Kicked everybody out. Then did a House of Pain show. Holy shit. Sold out two places twice in one night. But we all, because, you know, we were all at the same hotel. So, like, I saw these guys.

We were coming back from the hotel, me and DJ Lethal, and they were like, yo, what's up? We were like, hey, what's up? We're going to go up to the room, smoke one party a little bit. They were like, all right. We came up, him and his buddy. They came up, and they sat at the table, and we were rolling joints, and we're talking all this shit. And, like, me and Lethal are just rolling all joint after joint, throwing them on the table. And then we stopped and we go to light one.

And both the dudes are sitting there just completely knotted out cold. Wow. Cigarettes burning to their fingers. And we were like, what the fuck? We weren't really hit. We were kind of naive. You know what I mean? We were like, didn't realize they were like on heroin.

Right. I mean, by that time we had. But it was like, you know, the whole time they were just like, you know I mean by that time we had but it was like you know the whole time they were just like you know Wow fucking sniffing or smoking shit out of a tin foil like pipe oh no I've done that before we roll the joints man you know you didn't even realize they were doing yeah it was like it was not they were only in our presence for the matter

of like 15 minutes Stone Temple Pilots performed for Dana White at his birthday party once and it was one of the best fucking

live shows I've ever seen in my life oh yeah like we want to talk about some dudes who are solid professionals I don't know if

you know those guys or have any I've met a couple of them do you like them I couldn't tell you I don't like them I don't know if you know those guys or have any. I've met a couple of them. Do you like them? I couldn't tell you I don't like them. I don't know them. I'll tell them to go fuck themselves if they don't. If you tell me you don't like them, I'm on a team never to laugh.

I have no personal experience with them. I've met them at shows, festivals kind of situations a couple of times. It seemed like all right dudes. I was blown away because it was a private party. It wasn't that many people there. There was a couple hundred people maybe. It it was dana's birthday party was all his friends and and you know i'm like you got stone temple fucking pilots to do this you know to the people that did it like dana didn't even know i don't think i'm pretty sure they did the whole

the whole party was a surprise so i don't think he knew that stone temple pilots was hired to play for him i don't think he had any idea until we brought him out. But to see Stone Temple Pilots just rock it like there's 18,000 motherfuckers on their feet. I mean, that dude can fucking perform. They're pros. With 100, whatever it was, 200 people in that room,

that guy went off. It was magnetic. I learned about performing watching him. I felt like an amateur. I was watching this guy like, just his fucking, his commitment to every step Everything that he did that the energy to those songs. I was like everything I do I suck at this guy's this is this is incredible

Yeah, he doesn't check out didn't check out at all It was it was interesting, but obviously very different than your acoustic sets which are equally interesting There's it's a weird thing that you could you could have two things that are completely different on the spectrum, but both have an equal impact because of their honesty. Whether it's a beautiful acoustic song that's really emotional,

or whether it's that Rape Me song. It's just like that. It just hits that note, whatever it is. By any weird way it gets there, by any fucking ups or downs, whether it's depressing or enlightening, whatever it is, it hits's depressing or you know or enlightening whatever

it is it's what he hits that note you know yeah he got kicked out do you know that who did scott wheeland yeah you got kicked out of stone temple probably for being too awesome drugs you're that awesome it's pretty hard to work with regular people i went with drugs i went same shit uh uh dana did that once with jo Jett at the Viper Room. Oh, really? Wow. Oh, my God. I would love to see that.

About 100 people. She just did the same, just rocked out. Yeah. But I know you know that check was beautiful. Oh, it had to be. It had to be. I know what the Stone Temple Pilots thing was. I asked.

I can't tell, but I asked. It was very nice. It was a very nice evening for those gentlemen but i'm telling you they did not treat it like it was like a private party that they could like barely get there and barely do the show for that's what blew me away it was like this dude was at a private party and you know i mean maybe he's a big ufc fan i don't know i don't know if that was part of his motivation but these motherfuckers nailed it i mean just destroyed you know i mean we were just people who weren't musicians like me and some of my other friends were just looking at each other going god damn yeah god damn how much joe 100 roses favorite band

100 roses i can't tell you man it's confidential shit 75 roses a lot of cash son they get pizzayed son it's too bad that they broke up

but doesn't that always happen it's like when you get a fat band together and they start kicking ass eventually fucking wheels

fall off of that thing it's like how many bands can completely keep it together for a long period of time it's like Kiss and like how many and even completely keep it together for a long period of time? It's like, Kiss, and even they, they lost Ace Frehley

and Peter Criss. They have a fake Ace Frehley and a fake Peter Criss. Kiss is Gene Simmons. And he needs Paul Stanley, so. Yeah. But I'm sure

Paul's kept in line. David Grohl's got it right. Gene seems like he keeps things in tight toe. The only time I was ever nervous at a comedy show because someone was in the audience, Gene Simmons came to see me on New Year's. And I was legitimately shit in my pants.

Because when I was a kid, my uncle actually worked for Howard Marks Advertising. And they're the guys who used to make the ads and the album covers for Kiss. And so I met Ace Frehley when I was like six or seven, seven years old, six years old. I was a little kid and he had no makeup on. And I was like just getting into Kiss back then. And I couldn't believe that I'm looking at him and he's got no makeup on because my uncle had like given me his records and I'd listened to the songs. I became a fan because my uncle would give me free Kiss records like that's so seeing him with no makeup on was like to Me it was a real freakout so having Gene Simmons in the audience even when I was 40 years old

I was still like yikes Like this is weird man. That's Gene fucking Simmons Gene Simmons from kiss. I saw him I saw them when I was a kid I saw them when I was like seven or eight years old and I saw them again when I was like 25 me and Kevin James who's a huge kiss fan believe me Kevin James is a huge kiss fan and me and Kevin James we went to two shows we went to two shows when they came back to LA with a full kiss with Peter Criss and Ace Frehley in makeup and we were like yes just complete unapologetic dorks. We were reliving our childhood together unapologetically, rocking out to a Kiss concert.

Throwing it to Chris. Yeah, I mean, he was air guitaring. And Kevin James is fun to go to a fucking Kiss concert with because he fucking sings the songs. He, like, gets into it. And this was back before people knew who he was. He wouldn't be able to do that now. Didn't he have, like, a scene in one of his movies

where that's what he's doing? I like i'm sure like playing guitar hero or something i wish if somebody had filmed it rock city or something like that if somebody had filmed kevin and i going to see kiss back in the day that would have been a fucking hilarious video because nobody knew who he was back then this was before his tv show it was like he had was like a semi-known comedian if you watch star search or something like that so he could be like free in public and not worry about anybody weirding on him so he just completely rocked out get up everybody's gonna move their feet get down it was just like a free show you know like especially like being a fellow KISS fan It was awesome Kevin James is fucking hilarious

That guy is one of the funniest guys That doesn't get credit for it Like he's like real clean in his movies He's like squeaky clean And you know his stand up He doesn't really talk about anything controversial But if you can hang out with that cat You hang out with that cat and get him to go full shimmy

That's what we used to call him His nickname is shimmy we'd call it going full shimmy where he gets fucking mad at things and throws shit gets red in the face and he's putting on a show for you you know he's doing a bit and some of the funniest the hardest i've ever laughed is just hanging out with him like like having him recreating an argument that he had with his girlfriend you know like and him going crazy and red in the face he was he's a fucking hilarious dude but he does movies that are like more like for families and kids so people don't get to see that aspect of him it's too bad you know we don't want a balanced world we don't want a dude to do kids movies and still you know that's why we should have him on

the podcast for sure he wouldn't do it sag it was you know he's like one of the dirtiest comics ever used to be yeah and i guess he was full house for you know he was like the full house guy but i think he stopped doing stand-up during that time yeah now he's super dirty and playing off the full house back back to the dirty thing yeah i think they probably told him hey dude you this is like a hundred million dollar business we're running here do you understand you could fuck that up by telling a dick joke at the laugh factory so why don't you just lay off that you're getting you know x amount of millions a week i always heard they did that with tim allen as well they told tim allen to stop doing a stand-up because it was a little controversial i don't know crazy man that's tv

though all i know is i never got successful enough for anybody to bother to tell me to stop doing anything you'll write me a check not to do things when they start writing you checks not to do things you're doing something right man well i never got i was never important enough in the equation where they asked me to not do something like it was going to fuck things up you know like i guess like when fear factor came along people were already sort of opening up to the idea that the world isn't exactly as we've been told. And that there's a lot more variation in people than you would like to imagine. And, you know, the world's a big fucking place.

Plus, how could a dick joke fuck up a show where somebody's going to eat, like, goat dick? You know what I mean? It's also you can express yourself now. Before, if you said something fucked up a long time ago, you had to get booked on The Tonight Show to explain yourself yourself You know remember like when Hugh Grant got caught with the the hooker and it was like the big thing and he went on Jay Leno Well, what the hell were you thinking? He gets it you could just do a video blog now You know I'm saying like instantly have something where expresses himself now. There's like there's so much range for expression now There's so much room. It's just a completely different world

So I still have to apologize if you Hugh Grant though just a completely different world. You still have to apologize if you're Hugh Grant, though. Like, you, certain comedians, like, wouldn't have to apologize. Right. Yeah, well,

a guy like Hugh Grant is selling that thing. He's selling this one style. As Kevin is selling, you know, the squeaky clean family comedy, you know,

Hugh Grant was selling the really sweet boyfriend guy, you know, who's from England and would like to help you move. Can I caviar your couch?

Non-aggressive. He's not some crazy dude looking to get his dick sucked on a sneak tip. By a dirty girl. Who's the crazy dude? Street hooker, man. All right. There's that, too. But, okay, you just reminded me of something.

There's that English dude on CNN with the glasses who's still on. English dude on CNN with the glasses who's still on but like three years ago the dude got caught like in Central Park like with meth in his pocket and like a noose around his cock and like all crazy shit it's Richard something Richard the British dude you would all know him when you see him god damn what's his name again Richard something CNN Richard okay so I'm going to Google CNN Richard Everlast dropping facts again But my brain works in crazy ways How about noose? Reporter

Noose around cock, see what comes up I'm going to have to say penis Look, here's Hugh Grant's number now Because it's Google That's her now? She's got a family She parlayed that into her life. Okay.

Got out the streets. I don't see it here under that. Anything else? The story really is Hugh Grant got someone off the streets. That's right. So reporter arrested, meth. Did you say meth? Yeah, meth.

Central Park. Here's American Eagle. Richard. Fuck, what the fuck is his name? Richard something. Here's American Eagle. That is dangerous. What is this?

Oh, shit. What are you watching? Did it dive on somebody? It smacked against the window. And someone said USA and it killed itself. That was an American Eagle. Check this out. It ran into the window?

Yeah. No, and then it died. I think it was supposed to. You know, it was a show. It was like, oh, yeah. It was a show? I think so. USA. Oh, it nailed nailed the window at full clip yeah they die all the time like that in my house birds are flying in my window they just fly in your window sometimes they miss

they don't realize what it is yes it's always sparrows cute little things too it sucks i know there's something you could do to get rid of it. Really? Yeah, Duncan did it. Throw him in the trash. No. Forget what he said. Yeah, I don't know what you could do.

Remember he said he had a bird feeder and he had all these birds hitting his window? I found a story. A CNN reporter arrested in Central Park. What was his name? Richard what? Richard Quest. Richard Quest. window i found the story a cnn reporter arrested in central park what was his name richard what uh richard quest richard quest was officially arrested for loitering and drug possession in in in europe especially cnn like over there he's like on all the time this guy got arrested like with a like something tied around his junk with meth on some rampage.

Well, it says the New York Post included the kinky elements in an article on Saturday. So there were some kinky elements to it. Yeah, like a noose around his cock. I like meth. Why is this one? OK, yeah, it says another website will tell the full story. Why are they withholding information? Say the guy had a noose around his dick and he had meth.

Don't say that there's like some kinky details. But it's like, dude, he didn't skip a step. CNN didn't fire him. They were just like, all right, just, yo. Good for him. Must be talented. Like, this is strike one. He's a good-looking guy.

Okay. Richard Quest was arrested early Friday morning for drug possession when people found in Central Park, well after the park's 1 a.m. curfew. Well, you know what? Well, so what? Guy was out getting his freak on. I'm just saying, he's a media guy.

I mean, you think normally... Yeah, it wouldn't normally get him fired, but maybe he's really good at what he does. And so they're like, what happened? He does like really corny kind of stories, man. He does like... Maybe he's like, look, I'm under a lot of pressure. I have a feeling some, you know, maybe whoever he was going to meet with the meth and the noose around his cock might be a superior at his job or something.

That's so funny. Can't lose it. It wasn't immediately clear what the rope was for. The officer in the scene was able to id the drug because of his prior experience as a police officer in drug arrests okay so the guy had a package of meth and he was headed home to his friend's house it says his lawyer claims that quest was returning to his hotel with friends and had no idea there was a curfew for the park i didn't know it was a curfew for the park neither did i that's kind was a curfew for the park. Neither did I. That's kind of weird.

Isn't that like the whole thing about New York City, is that you can do whatever the fuck you want? No. It's everything's open. Well, I think that stopped when people started winding up dead in the park. Isn't that weird? You can't have woods. Even woods in the city, people start killing people

and dragging them into bushes and shit. We're so creepy when it comes to woods. What is that about? We're so creepy when it comes to woods. What is that about? Women worry much more about getting raped or attacked in the woods. If you find men in the woods, it's way more dangerous than a man in a city. I think any rape is probably all the same.

What about alleyways? That's not what I'm saying. I'm saying worrying about it. If you ran into a man, it's just you and the man in the woods. It's way more of a rapey situation than you run into a man in a city Well, there's all sorts of other people and all sorts of buildings and when you're out there in the woods It's a totally different environment for a woman It must be you must feel like ultra violent like like ultra violent dudes that you could just stumble upon are Super fucking dangerous if you're a woman whereas if you're a guy they're not gonna fuck you

They're gonna look at you and go, hey, there's another guy camping. If you're a woman and you're out there in the woods by yourself, Unless you've seen Deliverance. I think that that movie is accurate. There are people that are out there. Me, I see other guys even when I'm camping. If they're not familiar, I start thinking rapey thoughts.

Like, wait, man, I ain't trying to get raped out here. People get rapey in the woods, man did we did bring a pistol right yeah i would i really believe people get rapey when it's just out in nature something primal takes over man they get more in touch with their animal natures yeah it's almost like with creating cities and spacing things out putting doors in front of this and you can lock that and you're secure in this room. Instead of being all out in the open, we've slowly moved away from the primal instincts that have driven us to this point.

But all you need is just remove those buildings, stuff everybody back in the trees again, and the same shit will start from scratch really quick. The moment your kids start getting hungry, shit gets really fucking primal. Real quick. That's what I keep telling people. Yeah.

Well, nobody wants to believe that, that our civilization is just a thin veneer covering ancient barbaric genetics. Our civilization in the last couple hundred years, really? But if you go back to the fucking race riots in the 60s and the 50s. Like, isn't that like, what kind of civilization is that? What kind of civilization where they were just like completely discriminated against someone for the color of their skin? With all the books that were available. Like, they had decided these people were less and they were going to keep them out of certain bathrooms. That was the fucking 1950s. My grandma had to go to like separate schools.

My grandma, and she's Mexican. Jesus. So how much civilization have we really had? How long has it really been around? You know, she's Mexican. Jesus. So how much civilization have we really had? How long has it really been around? It's fucking barely here! It's barely here hanging on with vaccines and cell phones. Barely here! But if the fucking power goes off

or a big rock hits the ocean or one of those fucking volcanoes blows... Solar flare. Right back to a thousand, ten thousand years ago. Right back, real quick. Soon as we run out of lighters. Soon as we run out of bullets. Right back to a thousand, ten thousand years ago Right back, real quick Soon as we run out of lighters Soon as we run out of bullets Right back to crazy

It's going to take me a while to run out of bullets Just so everybody knows Do you hunt or do you just shoot targets? Brian and I are actually very curious lately We're trying to find We want to probably take a class on how to go hunt And actually kill and prepare an animal properly. Dude, you should go on Steve Rinella's show.

You should go on that meat eater show. Oh, yeah? Yeah. I'm not familiar, but I want to. Plus, I always feel like this. As a meat eater, I feel like I have the responsibility to actually have to go through and do butchering animal once. I've never had to do it in my life. I understand it.

I've seen it on film. But it's like I still feel like if I can't do it, if I can't stomach doing it, I have no business eating meat. I feel the same way. That was my motivation to go hunt with him. I wanted to experience it. And I wanted to experience it completely wild. We took a canoe. We went down the Missouri breaks.

We went on the Missouri River. It was amazing. I'm game. It was beautiful. It's hard work, though, man. You're hoofing it over these hills. If you're out of shape, it's really hard because you're doing a lot of high elevation hiking, and it doesn't seem like much because you're walking kind of slow, but you don't fucking stop.

And dude's in serious shape because he does his shit all the time He hunts every day like he's show is a hunting show. So he's always in fucking New Zealand climbing mountains He's like he's constantly doing this. So it's like he's got this kind of hiking endurance It's a lot of work, but the the experience of doing it was life-changing, you know, that's where I got that thing from Deer head right there. Mm-hmm there how much did that deer weigh 180 pounds wow about approximately how long did the meat last you um i ate it pretty quick i'm quite the carnivore i like meat yeah i just look i mean and i'm not a cruel person and i love animals and that seems seems like a contradiction. No, it doesn't. It's not. People got to realize that you have to manage a certain amount of wildlife.

You have to. For their health, for the health of the species. Like the idea of deer in total, like the idea of large populations of deer and healthy animals breeding and surviving in the wild around us is a beautiful idea. But if you don't manage their numbers, they just start breeding like crazy, and then you slam into them with cars, and then they run out of food, they starve to death, they start getting diseases, those diseases transfer to people. It really is as stewards of the land,

which is what humans claim to be. If we start putting fences up around things and putting roads, we're essentially saying, we got this. This is our spot. Well, you need to manage that wildlife. You have to. You have to kill them. Your options are either kill them or reintroduce predators. And they've tried both.

They reintroduced predators to Yellowstone and now they have real issues because of the decimation of the elk population and the deer population. There's like a fraction of the elk and deer that used to exist because they have these big packs of wolves now. And they're fucking successful because they don't have much competition. The grizzly bears don't know what the fuck's coming. And the grizzlies are not trying to eat the wolves. And the wolves aren't trying to eat the grizzlies. And occasionally they have to fight over a carcass or something like that. But for the most part, there's a lot of shit that they're killing out there.

So that was one solution. But now a guy in Minnesota got fucking bitten in the head by a wolf. This kid was camping the other day. And this wolf fucking clamped a hold of his head and was trying to drag him away. And he's screaming, and, you know, he eventually pries himself free, and they find the wolf and trap it and shoot it.

But, like, that's what happens when you don't hunt deer. When you don't hunt deer, you have to have wolves, okay? And if you have wolves, like, they're going to kill a few people every now and again. I like wolves. I do and again. I like wolves. I do too. I like wolves, but I wouldn't want them in my backyard. I believe in culling of herds.

Yeah, yeah, you got to cull them. But also, they're made out of delicious food. Who's going to cull ours? That's a good question. You know what I mean? That is the question, right? Who's going to cull ours? That's the real question.

That really is the question. Like I've said to certain people, if everybody just had less children, the world would be a beautiful place. Is that really true? No. You've got to look at it a few ways. One, you've got to look at it. Aren't people, they started out as children. We need people.

We, without a doubt, need to manage the amount of us we have. But don't you like people? I think people are awesome. Me too. I've met some good ones. I've met a lot of good ones man i've let a lot of good ones like we're a big fan of people so when someone says we got overpopulation problem i go right now do we right now like it seems right now if everything stays like this we got it i saw something online that was like this little graphic thing when they were taking census about every person on the planet supposedly could fit in the state of Texas with elbow room. Yeah, I've heard that too.

But it smelled like shit. It would be a real problem. The point being is there's enough room for everybody. Resources? That's the question. Is there enough resources? Misallocation of resources. That is the question.

And scarcity. Theocation of resources. That is the question. And scarcity. The issue of scarcity. I was watching something today just before I came here. You know, they show modern marvels. It's always, you know. And they were, like, doing this thing about, you know, city sewers and bridges and all this. It's falling apart and it scared the life out of me because I spend my life traveling with guys in cars and buses and on bridges and shit like that so but they were showing how this in st louis they're doing this thing with this they're putting these tubes down into the sewers and they're blowing them up and they go all the way down the sewer and then they heat them up and there's an epoxy

on the outside of them and they make plastic pipes inside the old decrepit and it's and and it's like i see it and it's so simple and so genius and it's like man what who didn't think what it took them till 2013 to figure out how to figure out how to do that you know i and it's like man what who didn't think of what it took them till 2013 to figure out how to figure out how to do that you know i mean it's just weird to me like i think that about stupid shit too like i saw a thing on the commercial where the there's a plug now that where the thing actually goes to the sides so you could put shit flat i was like it took till 2013 to come up with that yeah well if it was up to me, we would never have invented scissors. I would have never figured out scissors. I'd be like, just fucking cut it.

What's the problem? I'm so stupid, I can't imagine a laptop. I know I have one. I know how to press buttons on it, but I can't imagine what the fuck is going on behind the scenes. But that is the Wizard of Oz right there. Your laptop is the Wizard of Oz. Who knows what the fuck is happening behind that curtain You're just on Facebook

OMG LOL Please tell me Oh no you got it Oh you used the camera huh No I don't care Oh shut it off I keep it taped over dude

The government wants pictures of me beating off You go ahead and get it you fucks No Don't get it No My body image isn't that great right now So I keep it taped Well nobody looks good when they're coming on themselves.

That's just a fact. You just don't. It never looks like that's what you should have done. It always looks like you could have done some other shit. You put on some shit to do that. It's like if you're a grown man and you have a family and you have a life to live, you have businesses to run and shit, like how much time do you have for beating off? So every time you do it you feel like

what the fuck the shame rushes in what the fuck is wrong with me yeah exactly just look at yourself and then there's the like the knowledge that you're gonna do it again

you know you know you're gonna do it again like an alcoholic who can't put that drink down you're gonna do it again you're gonna do it again You're gonna do it again I have no shame, I want it to last longer I love it

Yeah, everybody wants to hear that right now People are throwing up in their car Thinking about you beating off all of your pasty hairy stomach How dare you How dare you My belly button dandruff How dare you Well it's good that they didn't fire this dude

for beating off in the forest or whatever the fuck happened. Doesn't seem like a bad guy. Who is it again? I totally forgot about whatever the hell we were talking about. CNN gentlemen. We don't have to shame this person. I ain't mad at him. I'm just shocked. I'm just shocked. You get caught with a rope

around your dick and meth and you have a TV job. He might be gay. And if he's gay, they might be less likely to fire him. He played the card. He played the card. He played the game. I'm good for him.

He got, he did, you know. Well, he's like, this is the gay community. We don't have children to walk out and watch out for. So we like to do meth and stick stuff up our ass. I pay taxes. That's the problem. Yeah. I didn't know there was a curfew.

That was my only problem. Well, I think that there are different rules. There's different rules for gay dudes because they only have to deal with dudes. Men clearly understand the intentions of other men, whereas men barely understand how a woman works. We understand how they work through experience, but as far as the actual mechanism of thinking,

the way they think, if you are thinking in your life and living your life and you're a man, it's probably virtually impossible to really understand what it's like to be a woman. So both of us are just trying to coexist and figure out what's okay and not okay, what gets you smacked. That's what we're doing as men. But gay guys don't have to do that. Gay guys just find a hole and shove it in.

Just get together. Do some meth together and just go fucking crazy. There's no, I mean, the cat has food, you know. The food and a little bowl of water. The cat's going to be fine. You don't have to feed that fucking thing. And they just butt fuck for days until they run out of carbs. And then they have to leave the house to go get groceries.

But that's all right for them. Well, meth, I don't think you need the groceries. You know, right? Well, this guy apparently didn't have groceries with him. He did have meth, so you got a point. He's just a gay dude looking to party, and that's how they party. They party different. They don't make people.

It's a different experience. You don't have as much responsibility when you get home. And, you know, he's not at work. Let him do a little meth. It's like an adrenaline rush. The man wants his dick sucked! What's the problem? If someone wants to do it and he wants them to do it, what is the real issue? Are we crazy?

Are we Puritans here? Are we going back to the old days? What's the guy do at work? When is it work? Does he keep it together? Well, fucking whatever then. He's a pro. Let the guy keep it together at work. It's even more impressive that way. Now say he's your nanny. Well, that would be an issue. If he kept it together at work, no.

What if he just kept it? That's a different job. He's a gay guy, though. But he's gay, though. But he's a gay guy. He's partying. He's partying. That's how he parties after work, Joe. The problem is it's a baby's involved. So it's another human being. It's completely different than if he was an accountant. I'm just totally playing devil's advocate. It's a good devil's advocate, but there's a responsibility of a parent to take care of a child, so it's irresponsible. My answer is easy.

Like, get the fuck out of my house, man. Don't ever fucking come back. Don't ever come back. Sorry. I have a friend who has a gay nanny. He calls him a manny. And the guy's, like, flamboyant. Like, nipple rings, and he's a black guy, and he's really flamboyant.

But he doesn't care. I mean, my friend's very open-minded, and the guy's not creepy in any way rings and he's a black guy and he's really flamboyant but he doesn't care i mean my friend's very open-minded and the guy's not creepy in any way he's just a gay guy and he's really good at working with kids like he's very responsible with children he's he's educational he does art projects with him you know like he does shit with his kid like if he's got to watch his kid for a day like for five or six hours there's a lot of things will happen like he's like he treats it as a professional educator almost so it's a very unique situation so i've seen it guy's flamboyant as fuck he doesn't talk about it like they don't have conversations about it he goes like i don't want to know i don't want to know but the guy's out fucking hitting it all the time out there just slinging dicks in the

club and then taking care of little kids all day for him it seems to work i mean i haven't experienced this gentleman in person. I don't know what his personality is like, whether or not I would trust him with my kids. God bless him. But my friend has no problem with it. He enjoys the exchange. But he lives in San Francisco. His kid's going to be open-minded.

Yeah. My buddy lives in San Francisco, which is a completely different environment, period. You know, so many gay people are up there, they're undeniable. You can't be a hater of gays. Half the fucking people are going to run into her gay. Shit,

we're in Hollywood, though. We're in the entertainment business, man. It's pretty gay. It's pretty gay. It's pretty gay. If you got hatred for gays, you're not going to get far.

Yeah, it's not a good spot. But you know what? I've been accused of having hatred for gays because I make fun of them, but everybody gets it. You're all going to get it. Anybody who's funny, you do something funny, you make fun of them but everybody gets it you're all gonna get it anybody who's funny you do something funny you get it you're gonna get it it's just a joke i'm gonna get it for myself too i'll get it all over me you know it's fucking humor like make fun of yourself you get it what's it's you know that's silly

you can't be homophobic because you have a gay joke or a joke about how you reacted to watching Brokeback Mountain. That's how I reacted. I was cringing. I was tightened up. I barely could stay in my seat. When those guys were fucking in that tent, I was like, oh, Jesus. Spit on his hand.

Oh, my God. When he just yanked his pants down, spit on his hand. It got real. See, I've never seen it. It was intense. But I have a similar experience because Sean Penn's a pretty good buddy of mine, and I've seen Milk, so that was tough. I didn't see Milk. I heard it was great, but it's one of those movies that slipped me by.

It was a great film, but it was tough to watch him make out with dudes and get all heavy and petty. I was like, oh, man. Oh, my. I get it. I get it. I get it. Can't you guys just fade to black, look into each other's eyes? Do it old school.

And then hear birds chirping and see the sun come up. I love boozy stuff. Yeah, your alarm clock goes off. Oh, wow. Separate beds. Look at the time. Crazy. Hey, I had a good time.

It always used to trip me out because I used to like that show. It was Six Feet Under back the time. Crazy. It always used to trip me out because I used to like that show that was six feet under back in the day. And it was incredibly a lot of gay characters

in there, a lot of gay action. But it would always bother me because if a hot chick and a dude on the show were going to go at it, it'd be just a little thing.

But if two dudes went at it, it would be a much more elongated, hang around on it kind of thing. And you know that's on purpose. It's so true.

It's so true. It's so true. It would be with the chick. They get a little making out, a little hair pulling, and then it would pan away to the window. And with the gay guys, it's like you got, like, two and a half minutes of, like, that grunting, making out, and, like, then, you know, fade to, like, something.

They're just making out and then fade to something. And the studio has to show that they're progressive by showing you a lot of really intimate moments. Yeah, the studio's trying to show they're progressive. We're progressive. We're going to show you some gay sex. And whoever was in charge of that show was more than likely, there's a couple of them that are gay, and they're like, we're fucking with everybody right now. Well, they're making the movie that they want to see. Exactly.

They're making the movie that they want to see and that's their expression. That's what art is all about, right? I'm just saying, let's treat it,

if we're going to do that, let's treat it like we treat politics. Equal time. You know what I mean? Equal time. That's all I'm saying. But they're trying

to balance it out like affirmative action. They feel like gays have been held down Can't give it to me all in one show. You can't do it. Affirmative backdoor action. It feel like gays have been held down for a long time. You can't give it to me all in one show. You can't do it. Affirmative backdoor action.

It's like they're just trying to balance it back out again. Let things get a little gay for a while. Equilibrium's off. It's been a little gay for a minute. Maybe that's what's going on with overpopulation. We need more gay people. Just let them slam each other. Just get a cat, man.

You don't need a kid. Jesus Christ. How many people are on the. Just let them slam each other. Just get a cat, man. You don't need a kid. Jesus Christ. Get a cat. How many people are on the 405? Let's love each other. Respect the people that are here. So the 405 is moving well. No more babies, y'all.

No more babies, y'all. What year did you come to Los Angeles? Originally, I was too young to even remember. My father was a construction worker. Came from the East Coast during the whole like palm dale or simi valley first and then palm dale like explosion oh wow so i came and then i went back because things kind of went poorly for him a little while and then a year or so later we came back because he he stayed and like he was building like i said simi valley and so i've been here since, you know, 70s. 70s, wow.

So do you remember driving on the roads back then at all? Is it hard to remember? No, not really. Not really hard to remember? No, not that hard. What was the traffic like? Nothing compared to what... It was nothing, right?

It changed in like late 80s. You ever go to Jerry's Deli and see those old pictures that they have on the wall? Uh-huh. Of like what it was like here in the 1920s and shit? And you're like, whoa, this was far away. That's why I love movies like Chinatown, when you get to see... Yeah, my house is in Chinatown.

Yeah, and the valley was just orange groves. Fucking weird, man. It was crazy. It's really weird. Chinatown, like little Italy first. But that's not that long ago, man. What the fuck is happening? And it's expanding.

Well, you know why they took away all the orange groves, right? Because they just stopped growing well. Why? Because, you know, fucking. No rain? No water? Oh, no, we're not going to talk about that. What is this?

It'll be a whole new, it'll open up a whole can of worms. Why? I forgot, I forgot. But a whole can of worms, what? Me and you will argue about it. What, geoengineering? No, no, no. It has to do with radiation.

Oh, no, no, no, no. Don't worry about that. That's what I'm telling you. You're talking about We've had that argument already, man. We've had that argument. It's not an argument, man. Look, I'm no scientist and neither are you. It's just what I've read from scientists. Debate. Yeah. It's a discussion about some shit that neither one of us are attached to.

No. But the area, like Calabasas area and shit, was like ranches. Yeah. It was like horse ranches and shit. It's weird because when you go there now, like the 405 all the way up to the 101 and the 101 all the way through Encino and shit, that thing is thick with people. Thick with people every day. The amount of people that live in the valley now, it's just slowly spreading itself

until what? Does it stop? If it moves this far in 50 fucking years, what does it do in 500 years? Is there any land left in 500 years? Has anybody measured how far cities are spreading and what the fuck happens in 1,000 years from now? It'll just be one of those what they call mega cities.

San Francisco to San Diego will just basically be. That's going to suck. It's going to. There's no way to grow tomatoes when there's just nothing but people. So who's going to cull our herd? That's an unfortunate way of looking at reality, but it's true. It's like if, I mean, I don't know what what the there's studies that say that the more time passes, the more education people receive, the more the economy balances out, the less people people, less children people will have. And actually, they run into a problem of the population slipping.

Like, I have heard that as well from people way fucking smarter than me on the subject. I love that. That could be a movie that Mike Judge movie the idiocracy yeah because it's like the smart people are deciding to have less babies and have them at the right time and it's like stupid people are just having fucking baby after baby after baby they're actually saying that that's like a trend in society like that's what happens when cities start developing and people start getting educated and they start getting careers. They have started having kids later and later.

And then literally you run into a situation where you could have like too few people. Like that could happen in industrialized nations. But then you got places like China, which is crazy fucked up because you have like 70% boys, something nutty like that. Because everybody can only have one kid. So everybody wants to have a boy. So like they're boarding females. I've heard all, I don't know, they're aborting females. I've heard all kinds of crazy shit they're doing if you have females. But the fact that these poor boys are growing up and there's no chicks.

Like, nobody thought that through. You can have more than one kid, but it's like extreme luxury taxes on it. Oh, is that what it is? Yeah, yeah, I'm pretty sure. Like, you pay enough money, you can have more than one kid. Oh, that's even creepier. The point being, people don't have that kind of bread, so they wind up only having one kid. But that's even creepier.

You have to pay to have another child. And what happens if you don't? Do you owe them? What if you just have the kid? Oh, yeah. No, I saw a whole thing kind of on this. I don't know if it was Vice or one of those kind of documentary-ish type things. And it was like, there's a whole black market for babies and stuff in China.

It's like crazy. It was like there's a whole black market for babies and stuff in China. It's like crazy. Did you hear about that lady that had a baby inside of her body for like 20 years and she didn't know it? And it was calcified? Ew. No. Apparently, yeah, yeah, yeah.

I just pulled it up. Brian, go to my Twitter. It's on my Twitter. I just tweeted this. This is the craziest fucking shit. Have you tweeted that? Because I think I would have paid attention. There's some you do. I'm like, I don't care about that.

And then there's ones that I'm like, ooh, that's very intriguing. Let me read that. If you go to the second one down on my Twitter, woman pregnant for 46 years gives birth to a mummy. She gave birth to a calcified baby. She had pain. Isn't that one of the signs of the apocalypse or something right there? It's pretty crazy, dude. That's a baby that turned into a calcium rock.

Wow. That's a baby that turned into a calcium rock. Wow. She was 26 years old, and she was taken to the hospital, and she was supposed to get a cesarean section. That lady there is 26? No. No. For 46 years, it was in her body.

So she's like 60 or something. Liar, bitch. No, I was trying to do all that math. Like you said 46 years, but she's 26 years old. She looks 90. She is 72 at the age of 26. She got pregnant. She's the one on the right, by the way.

She's pregnant at 26. So that was ridiculous. 46 years ago. So she's 72. And she went into labor for 48 hours with no sign of the baby. So she needed to have a C-section, but she wouldn't do it. So she left the hospital.

They wanted to keep the baby alive. The only way to do it was a C-section. She said no. So the baby died inside of her, and she stayed alive. And the baby never came out of her box. So it stayed inside of her body and calcified. And then she's in serious fucking pain and she

goes to the hospital and they found out that she had been living with this calcified baby inside of her body for 46 years. Can you imagine going down on that? The smell. Must have been like a tombstone covered in shit. God, he smelled like dead babies and fish.

How do you not know that's in your fucking guts? Yeah, that's, I mean, it's a fetus. So she was supposed to have a baby. I mean, think about how big a baby is when it's born. But there's a person's hand in the picture. That thing is this big. It's huge. Yeah.

Yeah, it's huge. It's a baby. How do you not know it's in your fucking guts? Well, it's really sad. It's really sad because the thing tried to live outside of her body. It tried to. It was passing through. It couldn't get all the way through.

So it tried to stay alive inside of her body. And then her body just shut it down and then just started digesting it or changing it into calcifying it. I guess when your body finds something foreign inside of it, sometimes it'll put like little like coated in materials that it creates, I guess when your body finds something foreign inside of it sometimes it'll put like little like Coat it in Materials that it creates I guess like naturally the naturally occurring thing so this thing turned into somehow or another it's just in a cocoon And it's like this antichrist Scientists listening to me described that probably fucking cringing right now, and I apologize for being retarded. It looks like snake poop. Yeah.

It looks gross. Now we know where McRib comes from. Oh. Brian, shut the fuck up. You just ruined the McRib for me, dude. Do you eat McRibs? Fuck yeah. Do you eat those?

Do you know why they're only limited edition? Because once in a while, the actual cost of rib goes down and up the stock market, and so they just buy a shitload at that time. Is that even ribbed at what that is? It doesn't look like it has any bones or anything. Particle meat. Yeah, it's not good for you. It's just, you know, you can't

have this many people and have real old-time barbecue places be the only place where you can get some food. It's just too many people. The way we have it set gonna have some the way we have it set up you're gonna have to have some quick food i'm gonna be able to pull in get a stupid cheeseburger and drive off because i'm busy or maybe that's just how they're culling the herd what by mcdonald's big scandal are you wearing tinfoil hat or that camouflage it's all about eugenics today i went there the other day and they only have

Two sizes now They got rid of small I'm like can I get small You know A small meal And then they were like We only have medium and large They're not small

There's another spot That just threw all sizes out And it's just like Well we only have Like the big Stupid extra large one now Because it's a dollar They're all dollar anyway

So here Yeah I bet men won't Like small They don't want to buy a small I'm going burn fucking small i'll buy a small i buy a small i don't want a small i want a small what about dicks whoa jesus i buy happy meal no one's buying dicks how dare you cheeseburgers dicks in seattle yeah no one wants to buy a small cheeseburger you ever had dicks in seattle no what is it you ain't had dicks in seattle you never had dicks you need to get it you need to eat a bag of dicks from Seattle.

Is that that place where there's always a line in front of it? A little burger spot, yeah. That place looks... I went there twice. Passed by. Never went there. But passed by a big line. Both times.

It's good. No dick. It's dicks. No dick for Joe. I would do it. I'm not scared. I'm not scared of dicks. You gotta do it just so you can say you ate dicks in Seattle, dude.

I would say I ate at dicks so I wouldn't confuse the fuck out of people. Taking it to third grade. There's nothing wrong with being gay, but you don't have to be gay when there's no gayness. That's called real gay. It's there, okay? You don't want to push the gay. I don't mind. It doesn't bother me, dude.

Or you do. Maybe you do. I'm like eight in my mind, so it's okay. I'm eight in my mind, too. okay i'm eight in my mind too i'm barely eight i'm seven i'm flying i'm eight i got a month away that's why that's why you got that little homophobia about me saying you ate dicks in seattle you know i mean if you had to do i still want to confuse people it's all i'm not don marrera's got my favorite line you think you think people would really get confused joe no you think you'd really confuse any folks out there

don marrera has the best line about that. He goes, I wish I was gay just so I could come out of the closet. That's how much I give a fuck. He's like, I really do. I wish I was gay. I wish I could tell people I was gay. And he's not lying. Like when he says it, you know, he's a dude who's lived a long ass life.

He gives zero fucks. Yeah, he's awesome. It's so funny when he says that too. I wish I was gay. He gives zero fucks. Yeah, he's awesome. It's so funny when he says that, too. I wish I was gay. He's totally serious. Totally sober. Gives zero fucks. I think it's almost like an intelligence test.

If you really give a fuck that someone's gay. I would like to see that just so I know who's stupid. Who's blaring out. Who's angry who's who's who's holding up the god hates fag signs like i just i want to know where you are just like because most of them are probably gay themselves and just scared of it you know terrified inside that they're gay huge number huge number huge number of hypocritical fuckheads i think it's like a like they think they're gonna throw people off like these gays we got a problem

with these gay Billy Would never say that if he was actually gay, you know, I'm telling you the guy's gay sucks my cock Whatever reason but it's a weird thing when you find other people are hating on gays and then they do gay shit like the Ted Haggard thing remember that that was that big case so the guy was like this he had like a fucking like a sports stadium filled with people every weekend like a mega church guy those mega church dudes are scary you know those dudes that control those gigantic huge ass fucking arenas filled with people have you ever watched some of those on tv yes sir he's the guy who got caught with like he had the meth too in like a, like, a hotel room. Isn't he on, like, there's a crazy, like, documentary on HBO where they have, like, the school where they're, like, preparing, like, youngsters for, like, Christian jihad.

Like, they're, like. You're talking about a different thing, but I know what you're talking about. That guy was involved in it before the scandal, and I think. Yes, he was. Yes, he was. Yeah, you're right. You're right. What is the name of that documentary?

What was it? I got it on my iTunes. The same chick who followed around the presidents for HBO did the thing. I forget what it's called. Yeah. I love all that stuff. It's a documentary. I hate when I can't remember.

I'm so stupid. Didn't y'all tell me I threw out a website here once and it crashed because everybody went to it? Oh, that definitely happens. Yeah. God damn it. Like the website to buy your new cd who sure who was in this movie uh in the movie yeah um who created it do you have any idea man it's a documentary god damn it she's really she's like the daughter of a like of somebody in congress or something like that. I almost want to say like Nancy Pelosi's daughter or something like that, but I don't think that's right.

Yeah. It might be because I think it's something Pelosi. Oh, man, you're killing me. Dude, that's the stoner reach, dude. That's the stoner Google right there in my mind. I'm trying to remember this fucking movie. If anybody hears this and they know what the fuck was going on, someone's the stoner reach, dude. That's the stoner Google right there in my mind. I'm trying to remember this fucking movie. If anybody hears this and they know what the fuck we're talking about. Somebody's got to know what we're talking about.

Someone's screaming right now. Somebody's saying, I know what that is! I usually have it on my laptop, but this is a new laptop. I don't even have it on here. It's one of my favorite movies about camp. Jesus camp. Camp Jesus. Yeah, there you go.

Jesus camp. I had to remember. Thank God. Thank God. This is one of my favorite crazy you go. Jesus Camp. I had to remember. Thank God. Thank God. This is one of my favorite, like, crazy people movies. Jesus Camp is a brilliant movie. And they did it. Scary.

Yeah, and they did it like, they just showed you what was going on. I mean, that's what they did. They just showed you what was going on. They didn't give you any editorial flair to it, no narration. They just show you what these people feel like they're doing, how they need to raise Christians, in the same way these jihadists are being raised you know i mean this woman compares suicide bombers you know and that they're starting them off young so we need to start our christian warriors off yeah because they're right so this is exactly that wants they're fucking crazy the shit they say to these

little kids and the founder of the whole thing was that guy yes he was a big part of it yeah why isn't that a terrorist organization it is it is it's just it doesn't get labeled as one you know i mean jesus jesus because they haven't done anything yet when one of those kids does something 15 years from now well that that camp that whole thing like conservative christians were against it like radio hosts who are christian who are conservative they were like this is indoctrination. Like this isn't, like what you're doing is you're making radicals. You're not educating them about God and about love and about, you know, what the Bible says.

You guys, you're making like soldiers for Christ. Like admittedly. Extremists. Stop. So conservative Christians were like, you guys are going too fucking far. But these idiots, their idea was that if the jihadists do it and what they believe in is wrong, we should do the same thing because we're right. You're like, whoa, that's some fucking logic right there. And they're allowed to raise kids. It's a brilliant movie.

Yeah, check it out. So they closed down that ministry. Good. They closed down because of this movie. Because this wasn't even something that Christians wanted. This was just like, you guys got to fucking take it down a notch. Who did make it? Who was the person that made it?

The director's name is, it's two people, Heidi Ewing and Rachel Grady. They're the directors. I was wrong. I was wrong about who made it then. Yeah, and they're also the producers. So it's fucking brilliant. They did an awesome job with it. Yeah, that scared me when I saw that the first time.

Well, it's, you know, when you realize how easy it is to shape a child's mind, it becomes really scary. Not only that, but how many like-minded people said that's a good idea and started their own little version of that somewhere, you know what I mean? Sure. I mean, how many people are homeschooling their kid because they want their kid to be nutty and not influenced by the ridiculous Dems and Libs who are teaching in school? You know, there's a lot of people out there doing that. Or science. Not exposing their children to other ideologies because they're worried that it might catch. You know, not treating your child as if it's a growing person and exposing them to and finding what their groove is.

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. We're going to sit down in this kitchen table and I'm going to teach you about the Lord. All this shit about evolution is bullshit, okay? There's never been a single piece of evidence that points to Earth being more than 10,000 years old. That's exactly what the Bible says as well. People, you know, fucking learn that shit.

And then you get to polls where they're... They did a Gallup poll that said 50%, 46% of America believes the Earth is less than 10,000 years old. Wow. That's old. Wow. That's real. Wow. That's real. So that's like, I don't know how long that's going to be around for.

I have a feeling that as Internet access gets to more and more places and more people get educated, that kind of thinking is probably going to go away within the next 20 or 30 years. I really don't see how you can keep it up. It just seems to be at a certain point in time, we're going to invent some sort of technology that's even more pervasive than just looking things up. Just looking things up on a computer. No one ever thought of that four or 500 years ago. No one ever thought that'd be possible. To us, this is everyday occurrence. I think there's going to be a next step in the evolution of technology that's going to allow you to access information without actually looking things up. You're going to be able to just get it in your head.

However, show it somehow in your head. And when that happens, there's not going to be any room for this shit. Who was it? Was it? Were we having the conversation about technology? Yeah, Cursewild. Exactly. The Cursewild.

Yeah. Tell them what we were talking about. About Transcendent, man, The curse word. Tell them what we were talking about. About Transcendent Man and that documentary. Just talking about how technology evolves exponentially rather than linearly and how pretty soon we're going to have nanotechnology and all that whole conversation. I interviewed him for my sci-fi show. I got to talk to him for over an hour. It was fucking awesome.

It was amazing. I mean, it's math. Well, he's also predicted everything. He predicted the search engine way before it existed. He predicted the internet before it existed. He created voice recognition software. I mean, this motherfucker's been around for a long time, breaking down what's happening as far as technological trends.

He makes great keyboards, too. He does. He makes keyboards. Isn't that incredible? I mean, he's just like a super genius. He's also made e-book software for laptops. I saw him. He invents things. He's invented a bunch of different shit.

He's just a constantly thinking, super genius type character. And picking his brain, it's not like picking the brain of just some average asshole who's going to tell you some shit he read on Scientific America. This is a guy who's going to tell you some shit he read on Scientific America. This is a guy who's actually making these discoveries. This is a guy who's actually been involved

in many technological innovations that have really benefited people in a big leap. Absolutely. And he's telling you about the future and you're like, holy shit.

All from a fear of death too. He's like, really, he doesn't want to die. He wants to live forever. He wants to bring his dad back. Yeah, he wants to bring his dad back yeah he wants to bring his dad back how crazy is that yeah the vitamins yeah and all that like well he thinks that we're going to get to a certain point in time where you are not going to be a single autonomous body function thing you're not going to be a single body like a

flesh and bone blood you're not going to be. You're going to be a combination of tissue and artificial creations, whether it's artificial blood cells or, and then. I already am. Yeah, you are with your heart. It's true. For folks who don't know, Everlast had a heart situation where they put a valve in. A titanium heart valve. And it goes like tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick, tick.

It's fucking wild, man. So you're living proof. I'm bionic. And what he's saying is that this is just one step and that in the future you're going to have a better version of your body than your body yeah and so they're going to be able to figure out how to get your consciousness into this super body this wolverine adamantium skeleton bone fucking swords come out of your knuckles yeah that's cominging your consciousness basically into a hard drive. Yeah.

And improving the body. And if you could download your consciousness into a hard drive, the guy's theory is basically you're going to live forever. It gets criticized, though, we should say. A lot of people say

you're never going to be able to download consciousness into a hard drive. They say that the human personality is so complex and based on so many different factors like how much hormones are in your system at a certain time, what stress level were you under,

how much cortisone were you getting. There's a lot of shit involved about trying to develop a human being from scratch to an adult. So many steps take place. So the idea that you could actually recreate that and have anything as enjoyable as a person. It's tough to believe.

It's tough to believe. I mean, I guess if you could actually recreate that and have anything as enjoyable as a person. It's tough to believe. It's tough to believe. I mean, I guess if you could mathematically calculate how many bad times you want to inject into a person's consciousness and memory and then create them over a gigantic computer process where you're literally inventing

memories. Algorithms all there already. To give them this adaptive technology that allows them to pretend to have lived a inventing memories. Algorithms all there already. Yeah, to give them this adaptive technology that allows them to pretend to have lived a rich and wonderful life, and then you get this really wise old dude, but really someone who made him in a lab, and it only took an hour. And they pop open the metal top,

and he comes out all steamy and shit and just dropping science on you with his fake brain. Yeah, but with no bad experiences. No bad experiences. Total poser. Yeah. How fun is that going to be? Maybe it'll be amazing.

Maybe he'll be like fucking Dr. Manhattan. He'll be so dope, he won't give a fuck. Maybe he'll be the most interesting man in the world. Yeah, fuck the Dos Equis guy. He'll be a righteous prick. Hey, dude, I never told you my story about him. The Dos Equis guy? Yeah.

Did you meet him? Yes. Dude, he's like 5'1". Like short. Maybe 5 meet him? Yes. Dude, he's like five foot one. Like short, maybe five foot four or something like that. He's like a little dude. His name is like

something like very Jewish. Oh, he's a Jewish guy? Yeah, yeah, yeah. And he told me he worked at a hardware store on Lincoln in Venice. He probably doesn't anymore because of the gang.

That's what I think where he was working when he got the gig. But that's not even his voice, dude. Oh, that's hilarious. So they doubted? I don't always drink beer. That's not his voice, dude.

That's hilarious. That's not his voice. I always drink Dos Equis, my friends. Stay thirsty. Yeah. Yeah, but those guys... Sweet guy.

I'm not saying anything bad about him, but they came... Here's the story. We were playing in the Playboy Mansion for some charity event and they come back to the backstage it's like yo the most interesting man here is in the world is here and he'd like to meet y'all and we would always love those commercials we were the clown on them all the time so we're like oh fuck yeah

he's got to come back here i mean it's on facebook we got pictures of it wow but he comes in we're all taking all these pictures and he's like yeah hey guys how you doing i'm yeah i'm told yeah i'm leo feinstein it was like literally something like that i'm being you know it wasn't exactly that but it was so like oh someone should overdub and i was just like i was just like man if that was me i would be milking that to the nth degree man i would walk and be like my friends you know i mean like i'd at least fake it is be on a commercial with a bunch of hot chicks like that and, like, a yacht and a Ferrari and drinking and mountain climbing. And you go somewhere and people just gravitate towards you.

That's the dude who had all the cool shit in that show. Yeah, but you got to be like, you got to be that guy, my friends. It wasn't that. It was, like, this little guy. How are you? Hey, how you guys? How you doing? Hey.

You want to have a drink? Maybe he needs to change it. Maybe he needs to bring it back. And then when I saw the commercial that night, I got home from the gig, and the commercial came on, and I realized the voice was overdubbed. I was like, oh, man.

It doesn't seem like it is. There, Joe got it. Joe got it right there. It seems really good. Hilarious. Who wants spritzers? Wow, there's a picture of him. Oh, my goodness.

You want beer? You want beer with these glasses? Yeah. Is that with everybody? Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's this one. Oh, yeah, yeah. Little guy.

Yeah, it seems like. Nice guy, though? Nice. Super nice guy. I'm not even trying to throw him under the bus. It was just one of those things where we were so pumped, and it was just kind of one of those letdowns where you're like, oh, man. Oh, I've experienced

that personally. People think that when they meet me. Like, they go, you're short as fuck, dude. I'm like, oh, this is what I am. Sorry.

You should put him in a yoke. Like, what was that clip I saw you, like, was it Fear Factor where you, like, put a guy in a yoke and, like,

one of the contestants? Yeah, I thought he was going to hit me. He was a guy that, he had a little bit of a history of violence. He had on one show thrown his wife down, and on another show he had attacked a counselor.

So they had actually warned me about him before he did the show. And his wife came back from a stunt and hit a guy. And I told her, I go, hey, because they would yell at each other and scream at each other and shit. It was really embarrassing. Like, you fucking idiot. It's right there. Go fucking get it.

Screaming at each other. And so one of the dudes on the show was heckling them while they were competing and so the woman comes back and punches the dude who's heckling her like punches him right into somebody really hard so i go hey you can't i go just because you hit your husband doesn't mean you can go around hitting other people like you can't hit other contestants and then the husband gets in my face and i was like i saw that i saw that i pushed him away a couple they didn't show all of it i pushed him away a couple times he kept getting closer to me and i was like this guy's gonna do this is gonna escalate so i'm just gonna grab him so i just grabbed the back of his neck and i felt like i felt like if he was first of all he's gonna

feel what it's like to get ragdolled and he's not gonna like that and second and maybe that'll calm him down if i don't do anything to him so i just grabbed his head and i just held on to him a little bit but that way also if he hits me, I'm just going to smash him. Just throw a knee on him. Yeah. When you're holding a guy's head, you basically own him. Like you watch Anderson Silva fight Rich Franklin. He holds his head.

When a guy that can clamp down on the back of your head and you can't get those arms off, that's a terrible position to be in. Yeah, the clinch. That's the Overeem. They changed K-1 because of Alistair Overeem. Bull cow. Because, yeah, bull cow. Perfect example. K-1 was like, you know what, man?ch. That's the Overeem. They changed K-1 because of Alistair Overeem. Bullcow. Because, yeah, Bullcow. Perfect example.

K-1 was like, you know what, man? You can't be holding people's heads. Because Overeem would just bum rush you, grab the back of your head, and it's night, night,

boom, boom. You can't get him off you. You can't get him off the back of your neck. He's huge arms. He's got that fucking lockdown grip where they just,

there's dudes who develop that fucking tightness to that hold where they slap that motherfucker on the back of your head then they pinch down with the two forearms and you're fucked man and then the knees are coming yeah why can't he get it going like that in the ufc there's a lot of issues one okay first of all he's taken a lot of head punishment if you watch alistair overham's k1 career his pride career the the strike force fights in the strike force fights really didn't get hit,

but he's had some brutal knockouts. Chuck Liddell knocked him out. Karatanov knocked him out. Shogun knocked him out. A lot of guys knocked him out. Badr Hari finished him. Badr Hari finished him. He got finished in kickboxing bouts. He finished Badr Hari, too. Yeah, and he finished Badr, too. So he's been stopped a bunch of times. Now he's been stopped twice

in a row. And the Bigfoot one was fucking trauma. That Bigfoot one was incredible that combination there's only been one combination as good as that finishing a fighter with hands and that's Phil Barone versus Dave Manet old-school UFC have you ever seen that pull that shit up Phil Barone versus Dave Manet Phil Barone is he you know he's a dude who like really underrated punching power. People don't know. He's had a lot of issues.

He's been in the game a long time. He's had a lot of injuries. He's had a lot of losses. But when Phil Barone clips you, you've got big problems because that motherfucker is dynamic. And this series of punches that he landed on Bonet to finish him. One of the best all-time KO scenes I've ever seen in my life. Look at this combination. Boom, boom, boom. That's the slow-mo.

Show the full-speed version. That's a shitty version of it, too. That looks terrible. It's like a Vito Belfort. See if you can find a better version of it so you can really see it clearly. But the Bigfoot one was really similar. Real similar. Real close. So it's like, that's a lot of trauma, man.

I think your brain needs a long time off after you get fucked up like that. Because Brown just touched him on the chin with that foot, and it was, bink. Yeah, and that was really the only time Brown had really hit him clean up to that point. And Alistair almost finished him, almost finished him. And he went out full clip to try to finish him, which if you do, it puts you in a real bad position gas tank-wise. And when your gas tank's done, when you thought you were going to kill the guy and the guy's still in front of you and you can't move, you can't move. But Alistair just kept moving forward, kept moving forward.

He didn't want to back up. He wanted to keep the pressure on that dude. But that front kick to the face, you you got to give it up to Travis Brown. That shit was perfectly placed. He tested it a couple times to the body, too, during the fight. Yeah. Well, he's got a long-ass reach. Look at this.

Here's the combo. Look at this. Bing, bing, bing, bing, bing, bing, bing, bing, bing, bing, bing, bing. Oh, it was like a speed bag. God damn. It's when you get hit when you're out on your feet. His head was doing like the speed bag off the fence, man. He might have hit him ten times in three seconds.

Yeah. He was incredible. And how many of those punches was he out He might have hit him 10 times in three seconds. Yeah. That was incredible. And how many of those punches was he out? You know what I mean? Most of them. Most of them, right? Once his head started doing this, he's out. He was keeping him up with those punches.

With those punches. Just like the Bigfoot fight. Yeah. Yeah. Very similar. So that kind of knockout I think takes a long time to recover from. And obviously I'm not a neurosurgeon. I'm just talking out of my ass.

But I would imagine that's an injury. It's not as simple as, oh, you got knocked out, you come back, now you're 100%. No, you got injured. You know what it's like to injure your back. You know what it's like to injure your elbow. That shit's got to heal. It doesn't feel the same.

And just because you don't feel your brain, just because you don't feel all that up there, I would imagine your neural system has to fucking take a little bit of a break. It's got heal up from something like that so they give you like 90 days like before you're allowed to like when you get ko'd they'll have like a certain amount of days yeah but how they can predict how one person's 90 days is same as that 90 days or like you know edson barboza terry adam 90 days when he wheel kicked homeboy and just starched him like he got nailed by a sniper shot

just bam that's a different kind of KO than a quick stoppage but they're both 90 days you know I think there's some significant injuries that happen

so that could be a part of what happened to him too you're dealing with a dude who's been knocked out at least 8 times and what about confidence too right like after

I mean like you get he's still super fucking confident man he still attacked travis brown right he just ran out of gas and then there's also the issue of steroids there's an issue of hormones you know and he says that he took he got popped and then they they kept him off for a year and he said that the reason why he did it was because he had a shoulder injury and a doctor prescribed it to him he didn't know there was testosterone in it which is possible but then when he got off of it, it showed that his testosterone was like super low. Like when he lost to Bigfoot, they did a test on him and they found his testosterone was very low, like in 190 range, I think they said it was, which is very low and actually kind of dangerous. Like

you're not supposed to be a professional athlete when you're fucking level so low. And so what's your take on all the dudes doing the TRT? Well, here's the issue. One, trauma stops your body's production of testosterone. It's been proven. The pituitary gland apparently is very sensitive. There's a guy named Dr. Mark Gordon who

was a specialist and he worked with James Toney. He's worked with a bunch of football players and a bunch of people coming back from the war. Traumatic brain injury. One of the things that happens is your body loses its ability to produce hormones. And so a lot of guys who have taken head trauma, their test levels drop. So then it becomes the question of, okay, if you need to take testosterone because your test levels are dropping because you've taken a lot of head trauma, at what point in time are we going to keep you away from head trauma? Is there ever? Do we just allow it as long as you can keep supplementing with hormones,

we allow you to keep getting in there, even though your body's like, look, you've rattled our cage, we're not producing testosterone anymore. Well, that's okay, we're just going to get it from a needle, and we're fine. We're just going to get right back in there. I think as a person who values personal freedom, I certainly think they should be able to do that. The question becomes, though, when they do it, how much think they should be able to do that. The question becomes, though, when they do it, how much should they really be able to get?

I mean, how do we really closely regulate it? Because it looks like some people get more than others. Some people, their bodies radically change, and all of a sudden they look like super athletes when they were kind of doughy just a couple of fights before. That's obviously something a little bit bigger than just bringing your levels up to a normal range. It seems like they're hyper levels. I don't know if it's the case, but it looks like that.

You'd obviously have to test them on a daily basis to really get an accurate read of what their levels are. But the thing is, unless you're randomly testing them on a regular basis people can cheat and there's ways that people can cheat anyway there's ways people people use fake dicks you know they people have been like tom sizemore apparently tried to use a fake dick when he was at a rehab place way to go to halfway house god bless him they sell that pulls out a fake hog he's trying to piss it in a cup and they're like what do you do get that that's a fake dick you crazy they sell them in weed magazines yeah well there's a lot of people man that's the reality of their job you know you have to you have to be clean but i think trt is a tricky situation

it's hard you know i think hey like freedom of being a human and if you need it in your life yeah yeah but if i'm you know as if I was a fighter. What about matchmaking? If I was a fan of the fighting game. It's tricky. To me, it's almost as controversial. I say almost. But it's almost as controversial as men transsexuals. Men that become women and they want to compete as women.

Because there's already been one of those. And there's one in basketball as well. I think that's just as controversial as adding testosterone and being able to fight. Not. I shouldn't say that. It's not just as controversial, but it's close. The testosterone is weird. The idea that you can just put it in your body and then go out there and fight as if you're so good,

like your body's producing that much testosterone, you're that aggressive. No. As you get older, your body starts slowing down naturally. So if you want to still compete and you want to still compete like like a young man that is the way to do it the question is how old should you be when you're allowed to do that like if it's a 46 year old randy couture you go okay i get it yeah give him a go but he wasn't even doing it right so but if it's if it's a 27 year old guy which there have been there's been guys as young as 25.

How old's Vitor? He's in his 30s. Like 34 or something, right? Let's find out. That's not very old. No, it's not. Because I'm 31. Yeah, I know

a couple of guys do it. I know... He's 36. The thing to me was like, you know, they love it. They feel great and all this,

and then they have to do the needle every day and everything. No, no, once a week. You do it once a week. Or you put on cream every And then they have to do the needle every day and everything. No, no. Once a week. You do it once a week. Or you put on cream every day. If they're doing a needle every day, they're crazy.

Right. They're gangsters. Oh, maybe I'm mistaken. But still, it's like, you know. And I was like, all right, well, for how long? It was like forever. Forever. Yeah.

I'm like, ah. Yeah, it's like forever is not real. That's part of the problem. But if you want your body to work really good right now that's the solution the question to me is not testosterone replacement as like a practice because i feel like i would take anything that makes my body work better i'll take vitamins i'll take whatever makes it work better like they say you're gonna do it forever i'm gonna brush my teeth forever too there's a lot of shit i'm gonna do forever that i'm not scared of right you know your teeth will be gone someday i'll get some new ones man. I've seen Mike Goldberg's got some new front teeth.

They're beautiful. Amazing. Lost him playing hockey. They just screw those bitches in place. Now we know. You got it too, right? You got like a post in your mouth and they screw a fake tooth up in there. I got to get one.

I'm actually due for one right now. That's a crazy little operation there, man. Wait. When you get the front teeth fake, do you still have to do the rods like what I do or like the titanium rods? I think they screwed it right into his head. Wow. Yeah, I think that's how they make sure that the teeth stay.

And when they do that, they're apparently super strong. It's just like a regular tooth. They have these incredible composite teeth now. They're really tough and well-made. They look exactly like your teeth. I mean, his shit looks perfect. Chew wood. It's amazing.

Well, some people have fucking gotten their teeth hacked down to put caps on them to make them more pretty. I know a lot of people that did that. That's pretty crazy, man. That's pretty crazy. Just for cosmetics, you're going to go with a full mouth of fake teeth. Hey, look how pretty my teeth are. You know, you got a toupee for a mouth. Yeah. On Teddy Roosevelt style. You see it so much

in this town, though. I know so many people that got that done. Yes. A friend of mine did it. Yeah. Yeah. Most actors. It's creepy. Yeah, it's weird. It's too white. It's weird.

Yeah, I don't know. I mean, I guess bleach your teeth if you smoke cigarettes. Yeah, I need to do it. But that testosterone thing, I think it's a beginning, bro. And this is the real problem. It's not testosterone. It's not a human growth hormone. It's the inevitability.

The inevitability of biological engineering. The inevitability that science, technology, technology all them will combine because there's a massive market for figuring out how to make the human body work better Kurzweil told me when I interviewed him that we are a decade away from inventing red blood cells that are artificial that will allow you to hold your breath for four hours he said you'll be able to sit at the bottom of the pool for four hours a regular person you don't have to be a super athlete. You don't have to be a monk You don't have to be some fucking dude who lives in the mountains just eating raw salmon for a year practicing kata

No, just one dude has some artificial blood cells injected into a system Hmm take a deep breath and you have plenty of oxygen for four hours. It's fucking crazy, and he said it's it's inevitable It's coming. They're already working on it's it's inevitable it's coming they're already working on it that's gonna be awesome dude it's gonna be incredible there's gonna be no sense in working out go spearfishing but then when there's no sense in working out it's almost like are we gonna be spoiled is it gonna be like the same thing that has fucked a lot of people when they have so much access to entertainment it's made kids lazy because they sit in front of the tv you can vegetate they're not as creative or active as younger kids.

I mean, that's the argument. But what is it going to be like when you can just be a superhero? Yeah. Boats are going to go out of business. You can fly. Let's just go to Catalina Island. There's a difference. You can walk.

Yeah, you're going to be able to fucking hold your breath underwater and walk across to Catalina. Yeah. And all you have to do is get to the surface, take a deep breath, and go right the fuck back under, And you're good for another four hours. Yep. Jesus Christ. Take a little baby oxygen tank.

You could just walk on the ground the whole way. The whole way. No problem. But we'll be a people of no fortitude. Well, they're also working on skin, artificial skin, that they merge human DNA with spider silk. It sounds like a goddamn comic book. It sounds like Spider-Man. But they're working on they're literally gonna have artificial skin that's bulletproof. So you're gonna have skin like on your body that's like

your skin it looks like skin but it's it's fucking bulletproof like literally nothing can hurt it. That's impossible. I mean it's not something I'm inventing with my imagination. This is like something that they've It's a proof of concept idea That they're taking from like the laboratory And they're starting to try to see if they can actually develop this Jesus Christ If it's pliable You can still get choked out

It's so true You just jump on their back Maybe that'll be at the end all When people become impossible to knock out It'll all be about Jiu Jitsu You just gotta get to that neck no more mma let him make bulletproof you're not choke proof dog yeah if you well there's a dude named uh rafael dos anjos and uh he got his jaw broke in a fight and now he said his jaw is a weapon because he's had so many titanium he's got titanium plates and

like eight screws in his jaw and two dudes in a row have broken their hand on his jaw Because he's like my jaw is a weapon now Like it doesn't knock me apparently when you get your jaw fixed to like that issue of like your jaw getting tink Sometimes that goes away not for every dudes But sometimes for some dudes you can't knock them out as easy like once your jaw gets fixed apparently It's it's like st. It stays in place better. Yeah. It doesn't break as easy because they got screws and plates in it and wires and shit in it.

And it's harder to get knocked out. So this dude is, like, I mean, what happens if someone, like, they just start making fake bones? Like Wolverine style. Yeah. Everybody has a scar from the top of their head all the way down to their ass crack because they just fucking pulled you out of that bitch and put some fucking good fake bones on you and now you never get hurt you just run around with fucking carbon fiber bones running through walls and shit kicking people with like an aluminum bat hell yeah fight sign me up fight to the death well there'll be no competition anymore that's the real issue the real real issue is, like, competition in sports

is a big part of what, like, sedates the masses. It keeps people, like, tuned into that as, like, a method of conquest. Hey, we're gonna fucking kick the Lakers' ass tonight. Woo!

When, meanwhile, they're completely sedentary. They're existing in this fucking maze, this fake world, and they're getting their gladiator instincts out through that. Well, if that all goes away,

they're gonna have to seek some sort of other release for this. And that's an issue that people face. And when you give people some sort of distraction, that's 46% are going to go right for it. Right? Yeah. That's what we've got to fix. We've got to fix that. Just cut out the number of dummies

Call the herd How are you gonna do it though? You say that Okay let me ask you this If Everlast If you were an alien From another planet Super smart

Had your shit together totally And you came to Earth And you know You could do whatever the fuck you want You're an alien You're from a thousand million years In the future Okay so I have no conscience

Or Well you have conscience But people are below you Towards humanity It's like If you came upon Let me ask you this If you came upon a village future okay so i have no conscience or or you have conscience but people are below humanity it's like if you came upon let me ask you this if you came upon a village and the village was run by a bunch of rabid monkeys there was millions of them they were fucking up everything throwing shit at people stealing candy mugging babies you would want to start killing monkeys right okay well monkeys are intelligent little animals if something is so far advanced from us

that it can get here from alpha centauri in a metal ship who knows how what they're going to think about us they might look at us as like oh this is this dangerous stage that a being gets when it's starting to transcend from its animal instincts into this this new emergent consciousness this group consciousness that's inevitable for the species. But right now, it's crazy. Right now, it's running around fucking shooting guns at each other and smashing each other on the highway and polluting things and dumping shit in the ocean and

pulling out all the fish and leaving a giant garbage patch in the middle of the ocean going to punk rock shows and fucking rage against the machine. Maybe they're like, these bitches aren't ready. They're not ready. They're not ready. They're not ready. We've got to kill some of them.

How are we going to kill some of them? Who do you want to kill? You've got to kill the stupid ones. But we need them to work. The robot technology is not ready for McDonald's yet. You can't have robot workers making you cheeseburgers.

So until that time, what the fuck do you do? If you were an alien and you had the say? Well, you know. You're giving me like a kind-hearted alien scenario like i'm an alien with a conscience i i could also be the alien that comes and looks at it like well there's this ant hill and it's in my garden and it's kind of serving a purpose but it's getting too big so I just got a stomp out half maybe they just throw an asteroid our way maybe

that's what it would fuck up the dinosaurs you guys do is change the degrees of the planet like by three and either direction and the whole world's fucked well all they have to do here's's what. Pull the plug. Don't just... What do they call that one? Some... Electromagnetic pulse. Bah! That's easy. Put the lights out.

Survival of the fittest. Well, one solar flare would do that, right? One gigantic solar flare would at least shut us down until we figured out how to reboot things. Clear hard drive. Unless... Unless... Unless you have some electronics

already put into a container. In the ground, deep in the ground. They don't have to be deep in the ground. They just have to be well sealed within a metal container. You can get an old style metal garbage can. Really? Take a fucking plastic bag. Put a plastic bag in it like you're going to use real trash.

Put a bunch of walkie talkies and stuff of the like in there. Close the plastic bag, tie it up, bang. Put the lid back on it and take that motherfucker seal it shut somehow and like if you ever did have that electromagnetic pulse those things would still be good afterwards bro are you a prepper no but i i'm i'm prepared though are you doomsday prepping you got electronics in a garbage bag anywhere yeah really yeah so i got the last house if the shit hits the fan dude i got i got storage units full of water, dog. Do you really?

Yeah. Whoa. Damn, dude. That's smart and practical. You know what's freaking me out lately? Not to freak people out. I'm not on some crazy shit. No, no, no, no, no, no.

Look at Hurricane Sandy. You know what I mean? Look at anything like that. When your whole block doesn't have anything and nobody shows up for a week. Listen, my good friend lived through that. My good friend Tommy Jr., my good friend tommy jr he told me that they used to they had to drive four hours to use their cell phones like your phone wouldn't work anywhere you had to drive like way the fuck out he lives in um in connecticut like

right near the new york border and he had to drive you know fucking hours they said that food was nowhere like within a day food was gone everywhere people were like going to to dunkin donuts and wait in line at Dunkin Donuts just to get something to fill your belly. And they're running out of food. I mean, there's like almost nothing left. He said it was crazy. And he said it happened so fast. He was like, he goes, you would think this is how Tommy Jr. talks. You would think they were prepared, right? You would think, well, let's see if the power goes out for a week, we're going to need this amount of emergency food. So let's have it nearby.

He goes, fuck that, dude. He goes, they weren't prepared at all. It was every man for themselves. And he goes, and it really made you realize how fucking scary things could get like that. He goes, because this wasn't shit. He goes, it was a big storm. But he was talking about, think about all the things that have happened throughout history. And the human history that we know of that was way bigger than that and think about all the

shit that happened in the dark dark past of the fucking earth when we know mountains were formed and just a couple of major events and now just just string a couple of those major events together like say something even larger than sandy something katrina ish and then let's just say at the same time when it's not it's far-fetched but it ain't impossible remember when that volcano went off and like nobody could fly for fucking i was stuck in europe dog like so let's say combine it with some super volcano eruption it's not that hard i'm not even talking about schemes or disasters at the end of the world i'm talking about motherfuckers get hungry they get vicious man and i'm gonna keep mines yeah and we don't have our

our life is not set up organically right now our life is set up to revolve around the the grid and until people develop as much food as much access to food organically as they do by getting things shipped and carrying them from here and there if you're not responsible for the production and cultivation of your own food which most people don't have the opportunity to. If you're not responsible for the production and cultivation of your own food, which most people don't have the opportunity to be, then you're not autonomous. And if you're not, if you can't support yourself and some shit hits the fan,

you got a real problem because also you have a problem with other people. to hunt something that God forbid, whether trucks stop coming into the supermarkets. You know,

I got, I'll tell you, you asked me if I'm a prepper, I guess, yeah, I guess I am because I'm fucking ready, dog. Well, I'm going to get you with Steve Rinella, man. I'm ready prepper, I guess. Yeah, I guess I am because I'm fucking ready, dog. Well, I'm going to get you with Steve Rinella, man.

I'm ready for like that. I have enough. I'll get to wherever I got to get if there's a certain amount of time. Also, I believe living in our society, it's like even if something bad did happen, you're only talking about at the worst. You need to be able to hold yourself accountable for yourself for about three months. Right. At its worst. That's what I figure. You figure you know i mean unless we're talking about some nuclear

disaster and it's like who the fuck wants to be here anyways take me out when that motherfucker happens yeah you know i mean yeah that's the thing right it's like how much damage do you want done to the earth before you're like tss i don't want to be here you know i don't want to be here for cannibal days right would you rather be dead than see people cannibalizing people, pull up on a ranch, like, hey, you guys got any food? And you see them fucking sawing a leg in the backyard, and you're like, oh, Jesus. They're eating people.

Right? That's gonna happen. I mean, it would fucking happen. Without a doubt, it would happen. It's possible. It's happened in the past. The Nez Perce Indians, apparently, were, like, big on cannibalism.

They were cannibalizing the fuck out of people because they lived in Montana, and shit got real cold in the winter. And it's hard to find deer, and it's even harder to shoot them with a fucking bow and arrow. So when you stumble upon some people that are just living in some wooden house,

you're like, oh, yeah, we got some food here. Let's eat those fucking people. That was a couple hundred years ago. And there's all kinds of witchcrafty things that go with that, too. Witchcrafty. Yeah. That's all kinds of witchcrafty things that go with that, too. Witchcrafty. Yeah. That's something I want to investigate.

Spiritual beliefs about eating humans and how powers it bestows upon the eaters. General butt naked. Did you ever see that? Sometimes it's not a power thing. Sometimes it's like there's a Nicholas Kneebaum. He wrote a book called Keep Your River on Your Left or on the Right or whatever. And he ate people. He practiced cannibalism with a specific culture.

And they did it when a relative died. And when the relative died, there'd be this ceremony where they would all get together and pray and sing. Or it was just mourning, some sort of mourning. I don't even know if they did anything. But then they would consume ritually certain parts of the family member altogether. Oh, what the fuck? That's dark. I don't want to eat people, and I definitely don't want to eat my grandma.

I definitely want it to be a stranger. But sometimes it's not a survival thing. Sometimes it's not a war thing. Sometimes it's just like... That's one of my jokes, though, whenever we're on planes or something. If we go down, y'all could eat me, man. It's okay. Yeah, I would trade my grandmother for somebody else.

You can have my grandmother eat. Take your daughter. They're obviously not doing it to enjoy it. Yeah, it's just I guess somehow or another they think they're consuming something of the person and bringing them closer to that person or something. Just finalizing the idea in their mind that they're gone.

Religion. Something. Have you ever been to a funeral with an open casket? Yeah. My father's. My grandfather was the only one

I've ever been to. It was very strange. It was tough. It didn't it didn't seem like him. No. You know? Even though I know it was him

I was like where is he? He's not there. No. They aren't there. That's the that's the bizarrest part is like you know even though i know it was him i was like where is he he's not there no they aren't they aren't there that's the that's the bizarrest part is like you know so strange it's the argument for that divine spark or that soul you know what i mean it's like because there's it's not there the same thing that the shell's there yeah i mean but it doesn't even look real it doesn't look like the same and i know it was he was made up a little bit and all this but i'm saying just there was

something yeah i don't know what the fuck not right about it i don't know what that transition is but i have a feeling it's just not what we think it is i think the idea of life and death is just what you're dealing with is one tiny frame in a fractal universe i remember only one thing from the experience what do you remember just? Just a voice. What'd it say? Suck it. No. You know what? Eat it, bitch. It was like a voice

that was just familiar, comfortable, kind of like your grandfather's voice, but I wouldn't say it was my grandfather's voice, but you understand what I'm saying.

And it was just saying, like I was in the wrong place kind of vibe. I don't even know if it was words or just a feeling that was being conveyed to me. Right, like you're going to come back. But it was definitely the wrong place kind of vibe. I don't even know if it was words or just a feeling that was being conveyed to me. Right, like you're going to come back.

But it was definitely the only conscious thing I can remember from the whatever several minutes that I was supposedly dead. Wow. That's trippy, dude. You've been to the other side. Maybe that's why you're so bluesy. I don't know, man. I'm just saying.

I just remember feeling like a very comfortable, like a situated ease kind of voice when you heard it. Wow. I don't know man I'm just saying I just remember feeling Like a very comfortable Like accentuated ease Kind of voice When you heard it And it was like Nah nah You ain't supposed to be here Kind of thing

A lot of people have said that A lot of people that have Gone through that said that But you know The fractal nature Of the universe I don't know why It's so weird for people

To think that something Happens after they die Like you showed up At your grandpa's house Too early for your own Surprise party That's how it felt Kind of like Wow And your grandpa was trying to be like nah don't don't that's that's the weirdest way I can put it

I wonder if what it is is just we we think that this life is all there is because this is what we're experiencing But this is just a temporary blip This is this one stage and an infinite number of stages and we leave this and go into the next one And we shouldn't be scared of it. Well, that's the realization that I believe most people call your life flashing before your eyes is the summation that your life was. Like when I was laying on the table and they were rolling me in for that operation, I was pretty much convinced I was dying.

I was going to die. I mean, the way they were panicking, the way my chest felt, and I knew I was born with this thing, I was like, oh, wow, I'm checking out. This is it. my chest felt and i knew i was born with this thing i was like oh wow i'm checking out this is it and like the whole time and i was just sitting there like it wasn't i wasn't consumed with fear i mean though i was there was there was fear there was just like this summation of like that's my life that quick wow everything that i've ever done has been that only that long from the minute i was born to now that's it

do the things and it wouldn't have mattered if I lived 40 more years that's that would have been the exact same realization that your whole life is so like so time is is irrelevant time is a is an illusion time is something we made up like we're living you know and we've slowed ourselves down by counting seconds. That's interesting. See, people always say that time's an illusion. That's a very popular thing to say. I think time's totally real, but I think it doesn't matter.

I think the thing is so big that your idea of time is such a joke. Your idea of time is like you measuring seconds in infinity. That's what I mean. It's like you're clinging to something that's impossible to cling to because although it is real and it can be measured. It's also movable. It doesn't matter. It's movable. You know what I mean?

You can move time. How can you move time? I mean, you do it all the time in small increments when you make these realizations of like all of a sudden you're somewhere. You know what I mean? Just that little small realization. These are things. Time is perception. Okay, it's not an illusion. It's a perception. I see what you're saying. You know what I mean? Just that little small realization. These are things, time is perception. Okay, it's not an illusion.

It's a perception. I see what you're saying. You know what I mean? So it's all in the way you perceive it. You could zone out. I can get on a 14-hour flight to Australia and zone out, and I feel like I'm there in an hour. Right. Is that time traveling?

It's also you could... You know what I mean? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I know what you're saying. I know what you're saying. It's like you are, even though this time is passing, it's not passing for you. You're going somewhere else. Yeah.

So where is it? Are you moving through time? What are you doing during that time? There was 17 hours unaccounted for. You know what I mean? Yeah, and you just vegetated and lost it. Took a nap. Came to...

But, you know, the time is still... When I used to take acid a lot. They would have it all the time. I'd sit there, take acid, and I'd watch the fucking sun go down and come up, and it would seem like the span of 15 minutes. I don't think that counts. I don't think that counts with time travel. I think it's relevant.

I think it's related. I don't think it would survive peer review. I think if you brought that to a university and you're like, look, I figured out time travel. I'd drop acid and I'd watch the sun set, bitch. They'd be like, thank you, Mr. Everlast. They'd probably say you're closer than you think. We really appreciate your contribution. Yeah, you're right'd probably say, you're closer than you think. We really appreciate

your contribution. Yeah, you're right. They would say you're closer than you think because in terms of infinity, I mean, you really did time travel. If you decide to put a lot of energy on 14 hours

and like, God, when is this going to end? That shit will drag on forever. A watched pot doesn't boil. Exactly, but it does. The problem is it really does boil. But doesn't it take longer?

Doesn't it seem to take very much longer? It seems to because you're not enjoying the experience. I think everything is a matter of how much you're enjoying the experience. Because you're moving the time around. It's how you're using that time and you're moving it. Right. And so in that sense, the more joy and love you have in your time, the less time feels like it's passing. Absolutely. I agree with that. So that's the key. I'd agree with that. So make things so they don't ever stretch out.

It's always like one big fun experience. So you're always time traveling. Does that make sense? But then how would you know what fun was if there was no painful one? You have to experience it at an early age or get a microchip and they stick it in the back of your head. Like this is the blues of Robert Johnson special. Speaking of that, speaking that's a good transition to music we haven't done any fucking songs how we're how long we've been talking it up hours dude two hours should we just yeah it's

5 45 right now man damn we give zero fucks and you know everlast it's always a pleasure when you come on here man it's always fun to just sit down and talk to you. I do it, man. I got to promote, though. I got to promote, too. Yeah, that's what I'm saying. We got to promote a little bit. You're here to have fun.

But I'm here. Whoa, whoa. We went loud again. I forgot we're on the singing mic. Life Acoustic. Yeah, the Life Acoustic I got, you know, which is kind of the Rogan audience is at least more than a little responsible for this record existing. Well, well,

listen, I'm honored. And, uh, I mean, I've done acoustic stuff at radio stations and stuff, but when I came in here and did it, people started actually calling and booking shows for it.

So that's awesome. And everybody said they buy it. So I'm gonna hold y'all accountable. Joe has like 500,000 followers. So go get it. Um, uh, let's try and get

every one of y'all to buy two of them. Yeah, I'm going to put that on Twitter. I'm going to put it on Twitter. Where can people get it if I put it up right now? Oh, it's on iTunes or martyr-inc.com. We'll take you to all my stuff, all my Twitters and Instagramables and

Facebookers. Brian, find a link and tweet it to me so I can tweet it. What are you going to play now, man? Let's do a little cover. We were talking about some of this a little earlier. Do you take requests? If I know it. Can you do an American band?

No. Not today. I've been obsessed with that song for the last it. Can you do an American band? No. Not today. I've been obsessed with that song for the last two weeks. American band. Grand Funk Railroad, bro. I'll try and have it for you next time. I'll have a very sad version of it next time. Oh, no.

Oh, you will. You'll crush my dreams. You will, man. You'll turn into homeless people and junkies and shit. It'll be beautiful. What are we going to do here? As soon as you're born They make you feel small By giving you no time

Instead of it all Until the pain is so big That you can't feel at all A working class hero is something to be A working class hero is something to be to be They hurt you at home and they hit you in school They hate when you're clever

they despise a fool Until you're so fucking crazy you can't find a better room A working class hero is something to be A working class hero is something to be something to be They torture and scare you for 20 odd years

Now they expect you to pick a career But you can't even function You're so filled with fear A working class hero is something to be A working class hero is something B They keep you doped with religion

and sex and TV And you think you're so clever and classless and free But you're our fucking business as far as I see Working class hero is something to be Working class hero

is something to be There's room at the top, they are telling you still But first you must learn how to smile as you kill You want to be like the folks on the hill A working class hero is something to be A working class hero is something to be If you want a real hero then don't follow me If you want a real hero then come follow me One real hero, then come follow me

That was fucking badass. Holy shit. That's my favorite version of that song. That was beautiful. Somebody actually from your crew, people's, and my people's on my Twitter, I think, requested that last time. I said, that's not a bad idea.

Dude, that's my favorite version of that song now. That was beautiful. This is John Lennon. God damn, he was a bad motherfucker, John Lennon. He wrote some interesting stuff, man. What's up with that yoga? Hold on a thing, though. How'd that happen?

I don't know, but this dude showed me that. The Bill Burr one? Yes, he's been amazing. I would play it. We played it twice already. We can't play it again. I wasn't hip until he put it. I knew of that comedian guy.

I always found him funny, but I never heard the Yoko Ono bit until he showed it to me. He's beautiful. Bill Burr's beautiful. Oh, man. Guys like him are so important to me. Because there's only like 10 of them. There's only 10 of them that are that good, that are out there, that point shit out like that, Beautiful billboard man guys like him are so important to me

Ten of them that are that good that are that are out there that point shit out like that Yeah, and they're honest about how they feel about shit like his his take on John Leno like you fucking crazy cunt Why are you yelling out? It's so so funny bill Oh, dude. It's so funny. Bill Burr is beautiful. He's beautiful. So guys like that are so important. Joey Diaz has his fucking take on the Candelabra movie, the Liberace movie. It is the funniest fucking thing I have ever seen in my life.

You got to see Joey Diaz's bit on it. It is so funny. Is it up on the YouTube? No, no, no. I don't think he's put it on anything. It's so funny. It hurts my life. You gotta see Joey Diaz's bit on it. It is so funny. Is it on YouTube? No, no, no. I don't think he's put it on anything. It's so funny. It hurts my balls. I haven't seen that flick yet. I gotta check it out.

Oh, it's beautiful. It's brilliant, and it's beautiful. It really is beautiful. And it's like, you know, saying that about a movie that's about a gay dude who's a gay pimp who's just giving these dudes amphetamines and banging them and playing piano and making hundreds of millions of dollars. Just running it.

He was a bad motherfucker, dude. Liberace was a bad motherfucker. Well, that was his game. That's what he did. He paid for their surgery. He made his boyfriend get surgery so he looks like him. Do you know how gangster that is? Like, he made the guy get a chin implant so he looks like Liberace.

Oh, God. Dude! He wanted to fuck himself, man. That like Liberace. Oh, God. Dude! That's so heavy. That's so heavy. You want to see something that freaks you out? You want to see this? Put on that video when Liberace winks at me.

Because, you know, for the longest time, I've played this before. I apologize to people who have heard this podcast, and they listen to every one. They go, you're going to play that fucking song again? The only reason being is because Everlast is here. I just want you to see from a cultural standpoint how strange things must have been in the 1950s where this was like a real thing there was a woman she's writing a letter to the liberace fan club because she's a huge fan of liberace now and she goes crazy and swoons when liberace winks at her and so there's liberace playing piano on the TV, and she's sitting there writing her letter and swooning. And look at this.

This shit was only 60 years ago, dude. Now check this out. Look at the TV. Now watch when he winks. I start to shake. I start to shiver. And every fiber in my being seems to quiver. It's a feeling very close to ecstasy.

Are you going to play along, Brian? Check this. That's what happens. Look at this wink. Whenever I see you wink at me. Are you going to play along, Brian? Check this. Look at this wink. Isn't that a weird noise? That's his wink. It's a piano key when he winks. It sounds like a computer made it, though. No, it's just a key.

Well, it's because they added it in. In a shitty, ancient fucking system on wax. Oh, there's no wink. I tricked us. He's going to wink again, though. I guarantee you. He's on T8s with those winks. How strange, though, that he was like a matinee idol.

And you came across this. I know. Because I got really obsessed with the movie. I saw the movie. Well, I didn't even see the movie. I saw Joey Diaz talk about the movie first, and then I see him talk about it backstage. He was in the green room, and we were dying laughing

when he was talking about Liberace slinging dick, you know, like hypnotizing motherfuckers. He was just going, and it was so funny. I had to watch the bit. And so then he did this bit about it. So the bit is just ridiculous. It's Matt Damon and Liberace. I mean, it's a fucking, it's an unbelievably hilarious bit.

So then I watched the movie and I was like, oh shit, this is a good movie, man. Like this is an interesting story. It's a young guy who fell for the charms of an old rich gay guy. And he just got gangster with him. And he's just, they're taking pills. And he's got a fucking pump that keeps his dick hard so he's hard all the time. He can never get satisfied. Liberace was just, he was a madman.

Just a madman. He had a thing stuck. He had like a thing on his dick where he could just get his dick hard anytime he wants. He would just pump that bitch up. God bless him. I got to see this flick. Oh, it's a beautiful flick. So then I started getting interested in Liberace.

I started researching all this shit about Liberace. I'm just going to start winking at you when I'm playing over here. Hey, listen, man. I'm not homophobic. I'm interested in human beings and strange human characters. And that was an incredibly strange human character. And the only thing that kept me from looking into him in the past was that weirdness about doing a lot of research on a gay guy.

Like a really obvious, why do you care about gay guys? Why don't you care about gay guys? He's just a human. I want to know what made that human. He was like an alpha gay piano gay guy. The ultimate. He made like a billion dollars playing the fucking piano. Who does that?

Who does that? That's what I want to know. And he was a gangster when it came to his work ethic. He was doing multiple shows in Vegas, multiple per night, you know, and he was a bad motherfucker, a badass performer. He made a guy change his face. He made a guy change his face. He used to come out with gigantic mink coats with like a thousand sables

wrapped around his body. You ever see those coats oh my goodness he had fucking just he was the original gangster rapper nobody had like jewelry nobody had more bling than Liberace he was the original the gangster rappies think that rappies the gangster rappers they they copied Liberace all the All the B-Boy jewelry stuff man And even probably Liberace style It comes from old Jewish ladies man Seriously

Like we're going Kazal glasses That's true Big gold rope chains All that shit It was like old Jewish ladies Would rock this fine jewelry back in New York And that's like

It was like the hot It was the good shit It was the nice shit Really That's yeah man I mean like Wow That actually makes sense I mean That's hilarious He dressed like a rich It was the good shit. It was the nice shit. Really? Yeah, man. Wow. That actually makes sense.

You know what I mean? That's hilarious. He's dressed like a rich... Kumo-D, though. What about those? Well, those were just crazy glasses, man. I go to work. He's one of the greats, though. Oh, without a doubt.

Dude, I go to work is a fucking badass jam to this day. Go see the doctor. Kumo-D a A real innovator You know Out of those dudes That were around then The most amazing to me Is Nas

Like Nas has never Stopped being relevant At all Well Kumo D's a little bit Before Nas but Yeah but out of all those Like 80s and 90s guys

Yeah When was Nas around Nas was around the 80s right Nas was like Early 90s Early 90s Yeah Hmm What yeah what was this i mean nas is still young like his first record came out when he was like 16 17 years old really yeah he doesn't age he looks good for his age yeah he's only 39 wow that's amazing well i thought he was

even a little younger than that but i was pretty pretty young back then, too, so I guess it makes sense. When I was, like, 20-something, he was probably... What is it about rappers that, like, very few of them are like Jay-Z, that, like, have this longevity and keep producing more rap that's relevant? Like, some of them, they get big, and then they fall off. Is that, like, record deal-type shit? Like, what is that?

Pop music's that way. Pop music. Yeah, there's a lot of fall-offs, even with those, like, doo-wop bands back in the day. Everyone only remembers like one or two groups. Well, the cat like Jay, too, he started completely, he started independently, selling his own records and then came into the record business

as his own full partner. A lot of these cats, they got what's called a 360 deal nowadays. The label gets everything. They get your merchandising. They get your, you they get your you know every rights all they get pieces of your touring back when i signed record deals back in the day like i i'm my own label now i do my own thing i'm completely independent

but when we had made when i used to do major label deals i didn't have to give them anything but a record you know i mean right now they want your publishing they want your touring they want your merchandising why you're touring too yeah because nobody buys records really you know what i mean right now they want your publishing they want your touring they want your merchandising why you're touring too yeah because nobody buys records really you know i mean and people buy singles nobody buys albums anymore if you came along right now those are the only deals that are available pretty much unless you got something going on already like unless you already have developed yourself a scene and you're making if you're earning on your own level i'm sure you can go work yourself a deal somewhere and how do musicians but if you're doing that nowadays it's like you almost don't even want to do that you almost it's like

for every advantage there is to have that million dollar billion dollar machine behind you with the you know there's some there's there's disadvantages to it well it seems like financially i can't do what you can't do what you want i know of groups that have like uh i know a group that the the guy the head singer it's a group fits in the tantrums. And this head singer, like, supposedly just saved up a bunch of money and used his life savings to spearhead his group. He funded it himself. They hit the road.

They played. He hired good musicians, you know. Shout out to James King. Like, he just got good people on it, and they just toured, toured, toured, toured, toured. They did another album. The song got a little radio love here and there internet love now you know it just goes from there but if you're just like some nobody you know you're doing like pageants or something like that you know whatever and you want to be famous it's like they're going to be like whoa what are you trying to do in the music business

right so if you're trying to do like star search. If you want to be rich and famous, you're not going out and grinding it out in dirty clubs for 10 years. If you want to be rich and famous, you're taking whichever route you can get there. But that shit doesn't work, right? In order to get good, you kind of have to... No, but you're asking about like a lot of them cats. That's what happens. They get turned out by labels. The label's done with them.

They're not hot anymore labels used to do stop supporting them Jay-z is a self-supporting like entity if the label left him behind he he is the label he can't be left do you release all your own stuff you own all your eyes well now I mean I didn't early on but the last few albums yeah I just do all my own stuff at least get myself beautiful and it's a little better every year you know more you know or the. The fans, you know, tell other people that, you know, I'm still alive, you know, and that I'm still making good music.

Then, you know, I sell a few more records and... Do some winks. You know what I mean? A few winks, man. Da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da Well, then you'd have to do the girl version. That doesn't make sense. That's a girl song. Maybe you could do a version where a chick is singing, and you're playing guitar. Shut the fuck up. There's no way to get away from that song.

It was good you stepped away that quick. It's just too ancient and gay, and everything's wrong with it. It's a mess. It's a mess. The poor girl's on her knees. Like, what's happening there? It's a strange fucking video. It's very strange.

I kept thinking it was Judy Garland, too. That's the crazy thing. Yeah, she had that look about her, right? That innocent 1950s woman look. It's definitely like a wannabe Judy Garland thing going on there. And they thought they were so sophisticated. They were so much further ahead than the Mongols

or American Indians or any of the people before them. 1950s? That's 50 years away from the 1800s, bitch. Age of innocence, right? Yeah. When we had separate but equal. How nutty is that? 1950s is only 50 years away from 1899.

I mean, that shit is like pioneer days, you know? This is a young-ass society. Cocaine and Coke. Yeah. Cocaine was in Coke. Cocaine in everything. Cocaine in everything. Cocaine was in everything back then. If it was in Coke. Cocaine in everything. Cocaine in everything. Cocaine was in everything back then.

If it was medicine, it had cocaine in it. Did you know that Coca-Cola still uses coca leaves? Yeah. And they process them to make Coca-Cola, and they use the cocaine from those coca leaves for medical cocaine. There's a company that processes it for them. They're like the biggest producer of medical cocaine. We've had, we've touched on this.

Have they talked about it? This is when I talked about the documentary. Which one? Because there's a crazy documentary about Coca-Cola in South America being involved in all these like, hit, like sanctioned hits

and fucking like, guerrilla warfare and shit down there. What was the name of it? Do you remember the documentary? I think it's like the Coca-Cola cases or the Coca-Cola files and here, let's shut it down again.

Document, documentaryheaven.com. It's money, dude. It's all about money. There. It's money, dude. It's all about money. There's too much money in Coke. How are you going to pass up on that?

That's how the CIA got involved. They're like, come on. It's so much money. There's bread down there, man. You got to sell it. Someone's buying it. Jesus Christ. So they just started doing it.

Supply and demand. It is, right? Right. Illmatic was 94. That's when Nas started. Yeah. But his first record was like a year or two Before that called

Live at the Barbecue Our main sources album So that was like 93 I think Yeah Maybe even 92 Yeah he's got The most interesting lyrics He's got really strange lyrics

You know Like that one song From Stillmatic Where he plays it in reverse You know the song Like the scenario Plays out in reverse. Isn't it a song about being a gun?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. What is that song? I think it's called I'm a Gun. Oh, really? Or something like that. No, no, no, no, no. I don't think so. Rewind.

It's called Rewind. Oh, Rewind. Yeah, Got Yourself a Gun is the soprano. No, that's a different song. But isn't the story about being, he has a song that's a story about him actually being a gun. Hmm. I believe it.

No, I don't know it. Maybe on that stillmatic? I don't know. On one of his other ones? It's all, you know, all his records are on a hard drive now, so it's like not even like in album categories. It's just a listen to his songs. Yeah, I mean, how many physical CDs get sold now

and how many get sold digitally? Do people still want this? Yeah. This one has a poster. More than you would think. Yeah, it's pretty dope. I love the artwork. Life Acoustics.

Yeah, my buddy Tristan Eaton did all the artwork. Yeah, it's... We just ripped off, you know, Wes Anderson movie, and... Yeah, but it's beautiful. You know, it's a tribute to... It's a tribute, yeah. It's a tribute. Yeah, no one's going to, like, get confused.

I mean, you use the same font. I mean, everyone... But it's a tribute. It's a tribute, yeah. It's a tribute. Yeah, no one's going to get confused. I mean, you use the same font. I mean, everyone, but it's really cool. I don't think anybody thinks a movie's going to be in my CD there. No, and it's a cool name. I love it. So what next? What about Jump Around? It says Jump Around on here, man.

But we don't really have the drum situation worked out here. We can do it without drums, I guess. Oh, no, no, no. Don't do anything you don't want to do. Not wanting to. I just think it would be a little bit better if we had the drum thing worked out. Then don't listen to me. Do whatever you want to do. I want to hear whatever you want to do.

I wouldn't want you telling me what jokes to do. I would forget how they go. I don't know. By the way, my Twitter handle is Raven the Banger. Raven the Banger. The Banger. D-A-B-A-n-g-e-r why do they call you Raven the banger or is that what you call yourself I just I just made it up one day it's just really high my last name is like you know some breakdown of it means like

little raven right and then the banger because like all the famous djs sounded all like dutch and stuff and like they did Oh, like Tiesto? Yeah, they just had these crazy European names. So I was like, oh, I'll just make it sound like... See, we have different ideas of who famous DJs are. Who's the famous DJ? Z-Trip. Like Paul Van Dyke or whatever.

Grand Master. Flash. It says your Twitter name, you call yourself Black Beauty? Yeah. Yeah, I'm with this guy, D.Y. We're all getting, like, high. And once again, all bad stories start with that. And he was like, oh, yeah, your hair is like, I'm going to call your hair Black Beauty, man.

And so why did you just say, all right, guess that's what I'm called now? Because, you know, I'm just like, fuck it. Fuck it? Yeah, let them name you. You know, that's the Brazilian way. Brazilians, they all give themselves, like, silly nicknames. Yeah. You know? Yeah. I used to do cap Brazilians, they all give themselves silly nicknames. Yeah. You know?

Yeah. I used to do capoeira. I've heard all the silly nicknames. They're funny. Like Pei de Pano, who's a famous jiu-jitsu guy. It's apparently like a cartoon. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know?

Like Pei Zhao is Bigfoot. Yeah. I was Avatar. Avatar. Avatar? Yeah, because I had a ponytail and I'm tall and lanky and shit. That's hilarious. They called you Avatar. Avatar. That's because I have like a ponytail and I'm tall and lanky and shit. That's hilarious. They called you Avatar.

That's funny. The tree of knowledge. All right. What do you want to do, man? It's up to you. What is that? Is that a drum kit? Rib band's getting down.

Don't let them. Stop them now. Her skin was salty sweet She wore sandals on her feet Side by side we fell asleep in her mother's bed She stepped inside of me Said don't ever lie to me This heart of mine can't be yours Yeah, that's what she said

But I just played the role And broke the heart I stole Cause I was young and dumb And fucked up in the head Do you want me live for real? Do You want me live for real, do you want me live for real, do you want me live, girl

For real Now I'm down by a river Taking off my shoes Jumping in the water Wash away these blues Now I'm into the ocean The current takes hold

Words already been spoken Tales already been spoken tales already been told hearts already been broken wounds already been healed do you want me live do you know do you want me live for real you want me live for real do you want me live for real do you want me love, for real Do you want me love, for real? Do you want me love, girl? For real Do you want be loved for real Do you want me love, for real

Do you want me love, girl For real Her eyes were hazel brown She left the sweetest sound And I just loved the way that she lit up Every time she spoke She healed to ease my pain She stayed through pouring rain

And I gave her all that she could take Until she broke She fed me like a glove She told me how to love And for some ass I watched it all go up in smoke You want me live

in reality You want me live for real Do you want me live for real Do you want me love, girl For real Do you want me live for real Do you want me live for real Do you want me to love for real? Do you want me to love for real? Do you want me to love? Do you want me to love for real?

Do you want me to love, girl? Yes, I want to be loved Do you want me to love? Do you want me live? Do you want me live for real? Jeez. Black Beauty. Yeah. Black Beauty. Give it up. Raven. Da Banger. Da Banger. Dude, that's a great song. Hey, that was off of a record called Eat It Whitey's.

And you're putting this out, and then you're going to work on a studio album right after? I've been. I've been. It's kind of a hip-hopper's thing. It's slow going because it's a very particular project. It's kind of a hip-hop-ish thing. It's slow going because it's a very particular project. It's kind of weird. So the beauty of this is there could be a volume one, volume two, volume three. It's easy to go in the studio and cut the acoustic versions. It's fun, too.

Yeah, it must be nice to have things pared down, too. Oh, yeah. It makes traveling so easy, dude. Oh, I'm sure, right? Do you just show up with a guitar like how do you do it us three just the way we show up here with but we don't even need to bring this because most places will have a keyboard for us oh that's nice right it's like two guitars and three guys like if you are in a big band like a big crazy band like how much shit do they have like let's say like if we got to go full gear what's a big band what's a band that travels big like obviously um you too oh they got semi trucks yeah they have like at

least two three-dimensional show right yeah i mean they're carrying their own lighting rigs and their own sound systems and their own you know how long does it take to set that shit up the day Wow you know they say Kevin Hart has like he's got an acoustic system that he has an explosive system that he has set up for his shows he does shows when he hits punchlines explosions go off how bad ass is that punchline boom that's pretty dope no one can copy that either. That shit's his. That's like if you want to smash a watermelon with a sledgehammer, too late. That's Gallagher. Too late.

It's not like playing the drums. There's certain specific things that you're not allowed to repeat. If you want to get shot in the dick with a pool ball, it's over. You can't do that. It's been done. Rock stars can do pyrotechnics, and other rock stars can do pyrotechnics, but they can also, like, other rock stars can do pyrotechnics. But there's never been a comedian that does pyrotechnics until Kevin did it. So now that's it.

It's only Kevin. Even though he didn't invent pyrotechnics, he owns that shit. But they literally go off on punchlines. Yeah, and I will, like, suck it, bitch. Boom. That's funny, dude. That's fucking great. I wish I thought of it.

I would make even, like, a shitty joke good, you know what I mean? Yeah. That's cheating kind That's fucking great I wish I thought of it I would make even like A shitty joke good You know what I mean Yeah That's cheating kind of dude That's so true We're at the chicken Across the road

Cause his dick was too long Boom You just wanna See that explosion again Yeah but he's funny too So on top of that I mean that must be A destruction man

That must be destruction It's a brilliant idea. But I think you've got to do something if you're going to do 18,000 people with comedy. Exactly. Comedy is supposed to be, honestly, 200 people. Clay never did nothing like that. Thanks, Clay. Never did this.

He might have. We need to ask him. Did he ever have explosions? He might have. He had some gigantic fucking explosions. If anybody did it, Clay might have done it. I don't think he had them on punchlines, but I think he might have come out to them or something like that. On punchlines, it's kind of wild.

Yeah, but I think he was probably the first comedian to do those kind of places consistently. I think maybe Steve Martin had done some arenas, and Eddie Murphy had done some arenas, and Richard Pryor probably did some arenas. But when Dice came on the scene, it was all arenas yeah it was like tours yeah he was the first he was a totally different kind of comedian because he was like a musician like people wanted to hear his shit they wanted to hear the same shit again what's in the ball bitch it was like I'll do it with him it's like singing along to free burn those reminiscing like if you if you remember those old like Monty Python when they took that on the road.

All they wanted to see was the old sketches so they could like sing along or say along to them like, you know. Merely a flesh wound. Merely a flesh wound. That's funny. Is that what they did? I'm not even aware of that. Oh, yeah. There's a famous live like DVD of Monty Python at the Hollywood Bowl.

It's hilarious. Well, that makes sense. Yeah. Well, yeah. I Well, that makes sense. Yeah. Well, yeah. I guess it totally makes sense. I'm a lumberjack, and I'm okay, and the whole audience is singing the shit. It's like all they did was the stuff from the shows. I'm embarrassed to say I was never a Monty Python fan.

Really? I mean, it's not that I didn't like it. I just never watched it. I never got into it. I was in band, so I was a Monty Python fan. So in bands, you just became a Monty Python fan? I was just banned. I was some sort of, like, all these banned musicians.

I think nerdy. I think it was a nerdy thing to be into when we were young. Because honestly, I knew some kids that played Dungeons and Dragons type stuff. And I got involved with them. But that's how I found Monty Python was through them kids. Because there was a thing called The Quest for the Holy Grail. That was like a movie. Such a great movie. The Honey Rabbit scene.

Oh, fucking. Run away! Run away! Remember the life of Brian. We are the knights of me. Me. Get us a shrubbery. Bring us a shrubbery.

Bring us a shrubbery. I need to watch it now. I need to know. Yeah, I need to see it. Yeah, those guys are brilliant. I'm missing something. Life of Brian was good, too. Oh, Life of Brian.

What was the one where they hacked the guy's arm off? That's fucking Quest for the Holy Grail with the Black Knight. Come back here. I'll bite your balls off. Prepare the holy hand grenade. The holy hand grenade. That's actually hilarious. The French dudes in the castle.

I blow my nose in your general direction. Castle Anthrax with all the hot movie you guys get baked one night and watch like my I think I will I just watched that I was laughing my ass off it's almost like now though in there's too much shit to see. There's so many documentaries that I have on my queue that I need to watch. There's so many movies that I haven't seen yet. It's almost embarrassing. It's like you can't catch up. It's almost like there's too much.

Well, I stick to old shit. I stick to everything I grew up on. Yeah. My wife always asks me, like, you've seen this movie like 500 times. How could you watch it again? I'll be like, because it's fucking good and I like it. Go over to Joey Diaz's house. There's a 90% chance to outlaw Josie Wales will be playing.

Is that right? That's a great fucking movie. Come here, Joe Rogan. This is the fucking scene. He lays it down. These are my words of life. These are my words of life. He goes up to the fucking Indian.

He's on a horse. He's going, look, bitch, either we're going to fucking work this out or I'm ready to die. What's up now? It's the greatest fucking. And he'll just, it'll be on like at any given time. When you come over his hotel room. If it's on TV, he's watching it. Outlaw Josie Wales.

All the people that have ever seen the Outlaw Josie Wales, I bet Joey Diaz has seen it more than anyone. It's a good movie. It's a great fucking movie. There's certain movies that you can see over and over and over and over again. It's good. I can watch it again. For me, it's The Mechanic.

Charles Bronson's The Mechanic. And Hard Times. Remember Hard Times? Hard Times. Charles Bronson was a cage fighter. What? Oh, yeah. You don't remember?

I vaguely remember that. He was a 50-year-old fit cage fighter. And he would go from town to town. He had this fucking shady manager. He had a cat that he fed milk to. town he had this fucking shady manager he had a cat that he fed milk to and he was this old wiry dude he was 50 years old when they filmed this shit see if you pull up the scene bare knuckle yeah Charles Bronson from hard times and yo when he was 50 this motherfucker was chiseled okay this is before testosterone replacement therapy

this was just the way Charles Bonds mentality he was just doing chin-ups and sit-ups and shit. And eating red meat. Drinking milk. Eating elk steaks. Watch this video, man. The way most people look at Chuck Norris is how I look at Charles Bronson. Charles Bronson was one of the baddest dudes ever. Look at this.

He's an old dude. And he's just fucking people up. It's a great movie. It makes me feel a hell of a lot better than it does him. 1933. America had hit the skids. People were out of work. And out of luck.

Third refill cost a nickel. Life was as tough as a cheap steak. That writing is amazing. It was hard times. I got a husband in jail. No job. It's amazing. Lee Marvin, huh? Lee Marvin like a motherfucker, dude. Damn, look how young he is.

It's like the original Every Which Way But Loose. Fuck yeah. It's the real one. Look, I love Every Which Way But Loose. But it can't fuck with Hard Times. And they're fighting fisticuff style. Oh yeah. You know why?

Because that's how they used to fight when they were bare knuckle Well that was that Queens of Marks They all did like this Uh oh Fucked up his old car What the hell are you doing? You don't want no trouble. Just you pay your debts. Speed was the hustler. Fucked up his old car. There ain't no rules about that, except who wins. Change was the hitter.

You ever get scared when you do it worse? I don't think about it. Use knees, man. You were allowed to use knees. Use the cage. You could basically do anything. They just didn't know all that other shit yet. They didn't know about leg kicks. You know?

No one knew a no-mole tie back then. They did. That's what they would have fought with. Yeah. Oh, he just clubbed that motherfucker in front of a pool table. Charles Bronson, James Colburn, Jill Ireland, and Strother Martin. Beautiful movie. They're a knockout. They're a knockout.

They're a knockout. I'm going to have to watch it now. I'm going to watch this movie. I'm going to watch it. Terrible, terrible. Speaking of that stuff about how they were and stuff like that around back then, I love how now you'll watch that show occasionally on Star Spartacus. Yes.

And they'll have a hand-to-hand battle, and all of a sudden it's like transitions of jiu-jitsu rolling into arm bars and a chokehold, and it's like, what the fuck? Get the fuck out of here, man. Pancration, they had that. Sort of. It wasn't like that back then. Dude, it wasn't polished the way it is, man. Whatever they had.

No, they were throwing heel hooks. The evolution of jiu-jitsu has changed so much since the UFC won, since 1993. But if you go back to the old school days with Hicks and Gracie, they had all the techniques. They just, it wasn't, the level wasn't as high as it is today. You know, but all the techniques were there. You know, most of them, like triangles, arm bars, all that shit's been around since the 30s.

But it's just so rare that anybody got, like, super good at it the way you see, like, you know, Marcelo Garcia or something like that. Like, the guys that are today are the highest level jiu- guys of all time there's still like hickson gracie still regarded as the greatest of all time but he was just such a freak he was so much better than everybody he was in some weird zone where like you would talk about everybody like oh this guy's real good this guy's real good and then there's hickson again everybody said it they all agreed there was no debate it was no like yeah but but I think Higa Machado's better. It was like, takes him.

That's it. He's the best. One dude. That's rare as shit. You know? But from then on, you know, besides him, from then on, basically, it's constantly gotten better. So that Spartacus shit, they didn't fight like that. Yeah, didn't happen.

They didn't have enough time. They didn't stay alive long enough to learn how to fight like that. Yeah. And you die when you're enough to learn how to fight like that. Yeah. And you die when you're 24 with a fucking sword in your stomach. You know, the idea that you knew how to transition to a triangle and then roll for an omoplata. Didn't exist. And then take side control, full mount. Too intelligent.

Head and arm choke. Skip to the side. Bitch, you don't know how to do that. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. Totally, totally. That didn't happen back then. But it's funny when they used to.

Like, I wonder, like, I used to watch Deadwood. but it used to bum me out when they swore so much. Because I can't believe they swore that much back then. Because they didn't swear that much in the 50s and the 60s. Why am I supposed to believe they swore that much in the 1800s? You sure? Is that real? I don't know if that's real. I don't think it was supposed to be proper society either, though.

No, for sure. It was a pimp. I mean, 90% of the swears came out of the fucking pimp guy's mouth most of the time. But that guy swore so much. It was just like. He was awesome. It was amazing. It was beautiful.

It was a feat of genius. I didn't know a human being could swear as much and as differently as that guy did on that show. And have it sound as natural. Oh, yeah. He swore it. Rolled off his tongue as if that was just a... I swear to God, the first time I saw an interview with that guy and he'd spoken an English fucking accent, I was just like, no fucking way.

I was like, get the fuck out of here. It's hilarious when dudes, when you hear dudes, you know, and they're like English guys or badass. Especially dudes that are flawless, like, pull off some, like, really, like, oh, there's no way that guy's not American, you know what I mean? And they're Australian. You ever hear Jim Jeffries do that? Jim Jeffries, the comedian?

He's hilarious. Oh, yeah, yeah, I have, yeah. He's an Australian guy, but he can do a perfect American accent. Like, perfect. It freaks you out when you hear him talk, and then he goes American on you. Yeah. All right, we're almost done here. So let's end.

You want to end with one more song? Sure, we can do that. We can do that. Let me think of what we're going to do here. Ten minutes. Ten minutes. Okay, yeah. We'll end it.

So thank you to our sponsors, Onnit.com, LegalZoom. Use the code name Rogan on both of those. It'd be so easy if it was all the code name Rogan, but it's not. So that's our sponsors, ladies and gentlemen. We will see you tonight at the Ice House. It'll be Brian Redband. Oh, yeah. Brian Callen.

Go ahead and finish your thing, sorry. Eddie Ift, Sam Tripoli, and moi. And that's tonight at 10 p.m. at the Ice House. And Joey Diaz is next door doing his podcast at 8.30. So if you get there early, go and watch that shit, too. And we're going to try to convince Joey to come over and do a set with us.

And then this weekend, we're in Milwaukee, Joey and I, at the Pabst Theater, but it's basically sold out. There's only a few tickets left. So you might get some single seats

and shit like that. And that's it. So we'll see you guys soon. Tomorrow night, we got a little release party at Hotel Cafe in Hollywood. So LA stand up. Come on out.

Beautiful. Where's Hotel Cafe? It's like Coinga. It's like right off Hollywood, between Hollywood and Sun. Come on out. Beautiful. Where's Hotel Cafe? It's like Coinga. It's like right off Hollywood, between Hollywood and Sunset, I believe. Awesome. What time is that? 10.30?

Yeah, I hit it 10.30. But it's a small place. It's only like 150 seats, man. Jump on it, bitches. Life Acoustic out now. Support Everlast. Go out and buy this shit. Put your money where your mouth is, you fucking dirty, beautiful freaks.

All right. Love you. Thank you very much for doing this, man. It's always a beautiful time. Pack it up, pack it in, let me begin I can't no end, battle me, that's a sin Never slack up, punk, you better back up Try and play the rule, you're the hook who are locked up Get up, stand up, come on, throw your hand up

You got the feeling, jumble, touch the ceiling Mugs, let the funk flow. Someone talk junk. You bust them in his eye. Take that punk's whole feeling. Funky. Amps in the chunking. Got more lines than this cop's at a dunking.

Donut shop. Sure enough, I got pops from the kids on the hill. Plus my mom and my pop. I came to get down. I came to get down. So get out your seat everybody And jump around Everybody jump around

Everybody jump around Everybody jump around From town to town From bed to bed It's like I said We jump around Everybody jump around I'll serve your ass like John McEnroe

If your girl step up, I'll still smack that hoe Word to your mom, I came to drop bomb Got more rhyme than the Bible, got Psalms And just like Paddock's son, I've returned One step and me's getting burned See, cause I got lyrics but you ain't got none You can come battle, bring a shotgun But if you do you're a fool cause the move I do to the death

Step to me you take your last breath I got the skill, come get your fill Cause when I shoot the gif I shoot the kill I came to get down, I came to get down So get out your seat everybody Jump around Everybody jump around Everybody jump around

Everybody jump around From town to town, from bed to bed It's like I said, we jump around Everybody jump around I'm the cream of the crop, I rise to the top I never eat a pig cause a pig is a cop Better get a Terminator, like all those sorts of niggas Tryna play me out like as if my name was Sega But I ain't goin' out like no punk bitch You used to wanna style

I might switch it up, up around Buck, buck you down, put out your head Then you wake up in the dawn of the dead I'm comin' to get ya, I'm comin' to get ya Spittin' out lyrics, hold me out with ya I came to get down, I came to get down So get out your seat everybody Jump around, everybody jump around

Everybody jump around, everybody jump around From town to town, from bed to bed It's like I said, we jump around Everybody jump around.