The Joe Rogan Experience - #430 - Shane Smith, Eddie Huang

Episode Date: December 18, 2013

Shane Smith is a Canadian-American journalist. He also is the co-founder and CEO of the international media company VICE. Eddie Huang is a restaurateur, food personality, sandwich hack, and former lawyer. He is also the owner of Baohaus in NYC.

Joe Rogan Podcast, check it out! The Joe Rogan Experience. Train by day, Joe Rogan Podcast by night! All day! I barely know enough about those words that I said to put them in a sentence, and there it goes. That's how easy it is to get on the internet these days. What words? All that shit that I was saying about vitamins, man.

I fuck with vitamins. You fuck with them? I love vitamins. I take grape seed extract. Oh yeah. I take methyl assist. Do you really? Yes. Grape seed take grapeseed extract. Oh, yeah. I take methyl assist. Do you really? Yes.

Grapeseed extract's good. Probiotic. Probiotic stand up. I love probiotics. I thought we had spleens so that we could eat rocks. Spleens? Eating rocks. Is that for eating rocks?

Bones. Really? Twigs. Rocks. That's what spleens are for? I thought it was just to get ruptured when you play football Like a little airbag I respect the dude that eats rocks Yeah, you got to

Well, we eat a lot of shit Well, we used to eat a lot of shit Dirt Oh, yeah, well, it wasn't that Tree bark One of the rumors of the appendix I'm not sure if that was ever been proven or disproven But the appendix

Originally was an organ for processing meat But I think then it was found to be more Fibrous vegetables. That was what we had the issue with. Maybe you're saying appendix, I'm saying spleen. Maybe it's something else altogether. Maybe we're not doctors. Maybe we don't know what the fuck we're talking about.

Dude, you can't be a renegade journalist, world traveler, and a doctor. There's not enough time in this world. Tell them, Eddie. There ain't enough time, Shane. There's not enough time in this world. Tell them, Eddie. There ain't enough time, Shane. There ain't enough time. Get your shit together, son. You're back from another crazy Vice World tour. Where'd you go?

I went to a lot of places. We were shooting in Louisiana. That doesn't sound very dangerous. Yes, it does. I've been to Louisiana. That's a heavy story. Louisiana's pretty gangster. And then we went to Turkey, Syria, Dagestan, and Greenland, and then Dublin.

Whoa, what'd you do in Greenland? We were there with the Danish and Greenland Meteorological Society as they measured how fast the ice sheets are melting and they're melting fog and bath. Wow. How fast? Very fast. So the IPCC report just came out and we are 60 years

so they do every five years they do a report that sort of has a spectrum of best case and worst case scenario and and worst case scenario. And the worst case scenario from five years ago, we're now 30 years ahead of. Whoa.

Yeah. And so this year, Greenland had its first full surface melt. So all of the ice sheet was melting. And highest temperatures in recorded history, et cetera, et cetera. And highest temperatures in recorded history, et cetera, et cetera. And so Greenland itself holds 23 feet of sea level rise. So if it melts, all of it melts, there's 27 feet higher. So we're all going to be underwater. Everything?

Like how deep will that take America? Well, so it would be where the water is now 27 feet higher. So it would go like the Big Bear. It would go, yeah. I mean, it would go, I don't know how high we are up here, but we're probably somewhere around 20 feet higher than sea level. Maybe. So we would go out there and there used to be some ocean water. Yeah, but like Shanghai, New York, Calcutta.

Actually, 80 of the 100 biggest cities are at sea level. Was it you guys that did the piece on Miami about how doomed Miami is? Maybe. I did a fantastic piece. You can't keep up with your own work. I did a piece with Jada Stevens about global warming. Oh, yeah?

Yeah. No, I didn't. We were just in the bang bus. But no, that Greenland shit, when I hear things like that And I remember I watched the Inconvenient Truth High

And I literally I pissed my pants And I was so I had a nervous breakdown That movie is so scary When you're like Eating edibles But

It's also the type of shit That makes me feel like I don't want to have kids You know Yeah but you say that But why How are you right now You okay I'm i'm

okay i'm i think most people are okay i think most people are going to remain okay despite the problems of the world i think we're going to figure out a way for most people to remain okay the idea of uh you know bringing a kid into the world if you're alive the kid could be alive and when you're dead the kid's going to be dead too everyone's going to be dead like what if you lived in the maldives? Would you have kids? I mean. Well, that shit ain't. That doesn't even exist anymore.

Yeah, they're going away. But actually I did a piece there too. But Greenland is interesting because, you know. So anyway, we go to Greenland. We measure the ice. The ice is melting. It's very bad. And then we sort of said, okay, let's get a consensus scientist.

Like a scientist who represents this sort of global consensus of scientific thought. And we said, what's happening? And he said, we have to cut emissions. This is a conservative dude. And he's like, we have to cut emissions by 80%. And I said, okay, well, if we don't cut emissions by 80%, then global warming will continue and then the sea level rise will continue to continue. And then I said, well, how much of it is man-made? 100%.

Okay. And so we can change it. So you're right, Joe. There's shit we can do to change all this stuff. But what the interesting thing I said is, okay, so if we stop 80% emissions, how long does it continue? And he goes, oh, hundreds and hundreds of years, probably a thousand years. And I'm like, so global warming continues for a thousand years, no matter what happens.

And Greenland's going to melt. He goes, oh yeah, Greenland's going to melt. That's a given. It's just how fast. So we will have 27 or 24 or whatever it is, feet of sea level rise. It just, is it going to be in a hundred years? Is it going to be in 50 years? Is it going to be in 200 years? Is it going to be in 50 years? Is it going to be in 200 years?

That's the only question now. Wow. And so no one anticipated this up until just a few decades ago. Yeah. We didn't even know what fucking sea level rise was. We're so fucking crazy. We just started burning shit and changing the gases that surround the planet and be like, dude, don't worry.

But the shocking thing is I'm like, how much of his man-made? Because I'm like, you hear all this shit about it's a cyclical thing and it's fine and nature's always done this. And he goes, no, no, it's 100% man-made. And I'm like, yeah, but is that like, you know? And he goes, if you talk to any scientist, a real scientist, you know, 95% of the global scientists are like, this is why it's happening. And I'm like, well, who are the other 5%? He goes, they're paid by a fucking oil company.

So what the fuck do you think they're going to say? So, and it's a given. And I'm like, why the fuck don't more people know this? That's one thing that I don't understand. And we also did this thing on the drought in Texas on another story. And everybody's like, do you believe in global warming? And by the way,

all the cows are dead. Fucking, you know. And they're like, no, no, that's been disproved. That's been disproved. And you're like, by who? Jesus?

Jesus disproved it? Yeah, no, people just paid the lie. Like, we did a Fresh Off the Boat episode in North Dakota. And we were trying to do stories on fracking. And we did a Fresh Off the Boat episode in North Dakota, and we were trying to do stories on fracking, and we stayed at a man camp.

And this was one of the most bugged out things I ever did. I stayed at a man camp for two nights, and all the strip clubs in the area had been shut down by the police because they had like 150 incidents of violence in these strip clubs because these dudes are out there by themselves working like 16, 18-hour shifts, and they don't see any women. So all there is is fracking sites, man camps, and strip clubs, and a Walmart.

And we drove to these frack sites, and we're shooting there, and we're trying to talk to people. And everyone was super friendly, right? Everyone wanted to talk to us to divert us. We would be on a fracking site. They're like, look, let wanted to talk to us to divert us. We would be on a fracking site. They're like, look, let me show you another site that's better. Let me show you. And they'd drive us like 10 miles away, 30 minutes out,

and then they'd stop the truck, pull over on the side of the road, and be like, oh, you know that site I was going to show you? It's just not here, man. It's just not here. You could go back and check that place you were just at, and then we'd go back, and then nobody would talk to us. So everybody would divert us. And it happened numerous times over three days in North Dakota. And we ended up pulling out of that episode because we went to a steakhouse one night to talk and hang out and meet the locals. And they were like, look, man, the politicians, like the people that run this town know you're here. Like you had tried to schedule these interviews with the politicians in this town and the people involved in the business.

And they told you they would do it, but they bailed because they just wanted to get you here and then leave you out to dry. We had interviews scheduled with all these people in the town. And literally the day we got there, everybody canceled and everybody diverted us. Why did they want you to go and then just leave you out to drive? Why didn't they just want to cancel? I have no idea. I'm guessing that they figured some, I think some people wanted to talk to us. And then once word got out that, hey, there's these guys with cameras in the neighborhood.

It's a small town. The man camp, we had to get clearances. And once the people that owned the man camp... What is exactly a man camp? A man camp is literally just rows and rows of trailers on top of gravel. And you stay... It's like if your school... Like my school got hit by hurricanes before, and you have classes in trailers. People just live in these trailers. And they split them up for like three or four guys. And it's one of the most depressing places you could ever go.

I think they wanted to get you out to the man camps because you're sort of sensitive. Chap. This is a crazy thing. So I watched the documentary on fracking. What the hell is it called? The famous one? They did two of them.

They did some guy named Fox, right? What is that called again? Gasland. Gasland, thank you. That's what it is. Very good. Gasland. Gasland was freaky.

Yeah. It was really scary. Yeah. And I heard that Gasland got debunked. So I said, okay, well, what's been debunked? And then I looked at it. I was like, God, they're kind of nitpicking if you're calling that debunked yeah and then he did gasland too yeah like he might have been off about some of the laws and about protection i think he

he misquoted some laws and statistics but the what he didn't misquote is these fucking people who talked about these mines being drilled and all of a sudden their water lights on fire he's that that was there's no misquoting there. What you're looking at is crazy. But that's what happens is you'll do something. For example, I just said Greenland's melting and then someone will come back and say, there's more ice on the ice sheet than there ever has been before or whatever. And I bring this up in the doc that every time I do anything on the environment,

you have to be so buttoned up because everybody comes back to you with a bunch of bullshit. And what it is, is there'll be like, for example, it's winter. So there's, you know, there's an increase in the ice shelf and then there's summer and then the ice shelf melts. What they do is net ice melt, right? That's the whole key is like the net of the year is melting and it's melting like fucking crazy. Of course, there's some happening in the winter,

but it's the net ice melt. And every time you do anything on the environment, everybody's got some fucking, you know, crazy stat against it or whatever. We did this thing on all the cows dying in Texas because of the drought. And the cattle ranchers can't afford the water. Why?

Because the water that they do have, they're selling to the gas industry for fracking because they need water infused with sulfur to get it out. So you're just like, look, it's, what I find shocking about it is, okay, that's fine. We've been doing this shit for a long time. We say no to things. But we all live here. Like the oil guys are going to fucking get fucked too.

Their kids are going to get fucked too. Like we are shitting where we eat. We are fucking ourselves. And that's what I find insidious. Because you're just saying, we're going to fuck it up for everybody. And by the way, we're not just going to fuck it up. We're going to pay hundreds of millions of dollars to say it isn't happening

even though we fucking know it is. Because it's worth doing that for the amount of profit they can make. It's worth spending hundreds of millions of dollars on propaganda. Biggest business in the world. Because they'll be dead by the time it affects them. Did you hear about the guy who was the top EPA climate control specialist? It turned out that he was saying the whole time that he was actually undercover working for the CIA.

So he didn't do his job with the EPA at all. He told them that he worked for the CIA and that he had secret projects and this was his cover. So they paid him. He was the highest paid employee from the EPA, and he was saying he worked for the CIA, but he didn't work for the CIA at all. So he was just getting all this money to fuck off. So the guy bilked them out of more than $900,000 over the course of 10 years.

This guy was just basking in cash. And this was their top paid climate specialist. Their top paid guy was literally a complete fraud. Well, that doesn't help our shit much. No. That's not good. Well, it's not good at all. But it's like these are the bozos that are watching over this thing.

Like they let this slip through. Like don't you have to have like at least a hall pass from the CIA before they just say, oh, you work for the CIA. There was also that point earlier in the year where the people that worked at the SEC then went to the banks, and the people that worked at the banks went to the SEC, and it's like, yo, who's the gatekeeper? You guys are just rubbing each other off.

Well, not only that, it's the educational institutions that set the standards and parameters for the business to be practiced in leave their institutions and get giant cushy jobs at these these banks and investment houses and that was all detailed on inside jobs you see fucking brilliant there was a great a great piece recently on the 12 bipartisan senators and congressmen, congresspeople, who passed the big pharma, the health, the pharmaceutical law. And of the 12 of them, 12 quit before their term was over

and went to work at big pharma. And their average salary in Congress was like $150,000. Their average salary when they left was $7.5 million. Jesus fucking Christ. And you're just like, oh, that's from the town, I believe. But they were objective when they passed those laws making $100,000 a year. They definitely were objective. They were just counting that cash.

Just thinking about that boat. Driving in that Porsche convertible. It's like winning American Idol. I got elected. I'm going to do a couple records under contract, and then I'm going to go and fucking be a star. Not only that, the standard's been set. That's what's been done. It's been done many, many times.

So they look at it as an option. Not only that, they look at it as the most profitable option, which is always the one that everybody juts for. It's perfectly fine. I'm going to become a lobbyist. It's going to become a thing almost like a lawyer that's trying to get a guilty client off. It's like before a lobbyist, as an educator, it's like, what can I get intellectually behind and defend? Right. Without being objective at all and just trying to satisfy my own need for money.

and just trying to satisfy my own need for money. Well, if I'm like a multi-billion dollar pharma company, I'm going to hire the guy that wrote the law to get what I want done. How would those conversations take place? How would those conversations take place when someone, do they bring you in your office and go, listen, this fucking stupid law that tells us that we can't frack, that's dumb. And that's keeping us from making money.

Fuck all those people and their blowed up drinking water. We need to figure out how to get the fuck in there. Come on. They fund their election campaigns on both sides and whoever wins, they say, hey, I funded your election campaign. You want a lot more of this?

You want tons more money? You want to get elected again? Both sides. Why get elected? Just come over. How is that legal too? How is it legal to fucking give money to both sides? That's crazy. You fucking give money to both sides?

That's crazy. You can give money to whoever you want. You fucking greedy assholes. Well, it costs a lot of money to get elected. But it's just so blatant that that's... The fact that that's how the system is, that's the actual system itself, that the people running things are like,

yeah, that makes sense. But the reason why they can do it is because we're one of the most misinformed generations. The information gap between your average reader and then the people making these laws and the people making the deals is gigantic. You think it's because too many laws have been passed? It's just too much legal? Well, for instance, let's say we look at the tax code, right? The tax code is thousands and thousands and thousands of pages.

For an average citizen to go read that there's no way it's incomprehensible right they just added so many pages and so many complexities so that the average person you know we used to have a duty to overthrow like the social contract like john lock you go back to the social contract there's a duty to challenge your government and even to the extent overthrow it when you think that it's not doing justice to the Constitution or whatever your social contract is. But now the average person really is helpless and paralyzed because let's say you wanted to understand tax. You can't even just go understand tax. Like things are so specialized.

It's like the assembly line has taken over everything. So we may know one thing. Like you may – you got – He knows everything actually. I mean I feel like we we may know one thing. Like you may, you got comedy. He knows everything actually. I mean, I feel like we only can know so much. There's so much to know and things have become so specialized that it's very tough

to kind of strike back at the empire. Do you think though that with all this like Edward Snowden type shit and all these leaks that are coming out over and over again with these connections between politicians and money and the influence. There's more transparency. More things have been exposed now than ever before.

Do you think that's going to make it more difficult to do? No. No? I think everybody goes, yep. I mean, everybody knows it now. That's the whole thing is this book just came out of the town. So you mean by everybody goes, yep, meaning they just accept it. Yeah.

Wow. And I agree. Look, I think that you do have a, you get the government you deserve. Yeah. And right now, we're very complacent, and we're just, all right, whatever. We know it's fucked. Fat from cookies. Yeah, we know it's fucked up.

We know it doesn't work. We know it's corrupt. We know that, by the way, there's good luck. They're playing chicken with the country every fucking month month saying, well, we're going to default. No, we're not. Yes, we are. No, we're not. Yes, we are.

You know, the stock market's going up and down and everything. It doesn't work. It's broken. And everyone goes, ah. And it's the least productive Congress we've ever had. They've passed the least amount of bills ever. And the bills they have passed are like fluff bills. So I don't know.

Fucking criminals. Yeah. Fucking vampires just sitting there sucking money out. Well, I don't know. Fucking criminals. Yeah. Fucking vampires just sitting there sucking money out. Well, that's the other thing is how, like, tax, tax, tax, tax, tax,

and what are they doing with it? They're just fighting their own little fucking battles in Washington. No lie, I think, to answer those for people like you and Shane to run.

No lie. I'm not kidding. No lie, because, like, why not, though? No, the answer's the aliens. You ever see, well, I think, I think we had this discussion one time when one of our drunken ones, because like why not though no the answer is the aliens you ever see well i think i think i think

i think we had this discussion one time when one of our drunken ones as opposed to now uh when we said you know when you run when like they they they get everything anything you've ever done right you want to talk about 3 000 page tax code my everything bad i've ever done would be 30 000 pages of shit that's why like you have to be like Mitt Romney, who never did anything. And I'm like, I don't want Mitt Romney to run the country because he's done nothing wrong. Because nobody's done nothing wrong. Everybody does

bad shit every day. You just haven't found it. I don't know. Maybe he kills kittens. I don't know. But generally, to me, that's what's abnormal. What's abnormal is never having done anything know. But, you know, generally, to me, that's what's abnormal. What's abnormal is never having done anything bad. And you're like, that's not human, dude.

I think everyone's bullshit is going to be exposed one day. I think one day, I mean, it might be our kids, the generation that's growing up right now, might be the only kids that never get to have secrets. Whereas, like, we've kept secrets for the longest time, and then secrets are exposed on the Internet. That's a very interesting point. There's more transparency now than ever. I think there's going to be no secrets in the future.

But I think there's a backlash against this no secrets bullshit. For sure. Because Facebook was like, no secrets, no secrets, because Zuckerberg never had a girlfriend. So he's like, everybody wants to know everything. And then Evan comes along with Snapchat and goes, actually, I had girlfriends in many of them. Hello. There is to only privacy now and so generations exposed they have an inability to hide but i think that's going to be going to

change because you know these politicians running if you look at like their twitters and their following they don't have nearly as many people as you you can use social media i bet you could run and win yeah i don't want to run and win i don't want to run anything i pay my taxes and hide you got to do it for the force, dude. Sit from the top. Dude, I'm busy with other shit, son. That's the thing. Everybody has their own path in life.

Everyone has their own path in life. Rogan Nation. Rogan Nation. Barely keeping it together myself. Puppet government. If I ever did win and anybody ever did listen to me, it would be a sorry state of this world. A person who's acknowledged to be half retarded.

But I think that Shane is right, man. We deserve the government we get. And I don't think, like, unless we get involved, I wish kids would get involved. Well, it's also, I think, the entire culture is changing at a pretty rapid rate. Whether we realize it or not, I think the internet over the last 20 years has changed us so much in such a vast degree from where we were as a culture then. I think we're still in the midst of this crazy wave that's washed over us, and we haven't let everything settle down yet. 100%. It's still going, too.

I think ultimately we're going to have to figure out a way to vote online. Ultimately, we're going to have to figure out a way to vote online. And when we figure out a way to vote online, at least one group is going to set up a way to have a mirror vote that doesn't count but allows people to know for a fact that it hasn't been fucked with. It's really easy to click on two sites. The internet's dope. Because, like, vote, and then you have, like, pledge to do the true vote as well. So everybody goes to truevote..com and they set up a thing there so they know this is not affiliated with the government. It's not affiliated with any corporations.

It's just set up by a non-profit to only collect votes. Then you give everybody's IP a very specific amount of votes. You find out how many people are in the household. Verify it. Get everyone to socials. Get it all in a fucking database.

And then let's see if the vote's real. Let's see the digital vote is real if it's been fucked with and you count it to true vote and that way you keep them honest you just have a few of these true votes things that are certified by whoever you know whoever and we we figure out a way to find out what the fuck people really want. That will change everything. That will fucking change everything. That and someone coming along and figuring out an organized way to utilize people the same way corporations utilize their people. That money's coming from people. It's coming from people that work there that make sure the corporation continues to make money, stockholders behind that, the people who run it. It's all people. If you get a gang of people

that believes that you shouldn't be shitting into the water wells of South Dakota, all these fucking places where they're fracking. If you get everybody to put their money behind that, you're talking about corporation money. Yeah. You get a bunch of people to put in five bucks. You get a few million of those.

You got some real fucking money to play with. I also think you have, as Eddie was saying, this generation is completely different than any other generation. I'm talking about Gen Y. And they've come up with this different and healthy sort of disregard for the political system, for the media, for the news, for all these things. They inform themselves, as you were saying, in their own way. And I think that they're going to work outside of the system a lot. And I think they're going to use the tools that they grew up with, which are these social media tools, these brand new tools, to do shit in a way that we can't even fucking imagine.

And you already see it happening. Obviously, you see it happening in other places, like Arab Spring and around the world and Southeast Asia and China. But when it hits here, it's's it's gonna be fucking revolutionary i hope yeah no people are gonna get to a point where they realize if they don't do it nobody else is gonna do it for them your parents definitely ain't doing that shit for you and you don't know my parents dog my parents are lopes no the internet's amazing but the internet is also this amazing tool to distract you from everything that you need to do and you need to read. Like, you have the ability to jerk off every five minutes if you want to.

I don't have that ability. I don't know where you're taking me. I have to go. I need to get it, though. Every five minutes, son. You're a goddamn rabbit. Yo, I'm Chinese. We are rabbits.

Look how many people we made. That's a good point. That's a good point, man. It's a very good point, actually. The Chinese and the Indians should have a war. See who fucks the most. Yeah, we could throw

a lot of milkshakes. Indians, I think, would. Indians win. Well, they have books on it, right? Well, so do the Chinese, though. Yeah, yeah. No, the Indians, it's a more refined act for them.

They have a method to their madness. Oh, Chinese just fucking. We just fucking. We out there. Well, it's so crazy now they're allowing Chinese people in China to have

more than one baby if they came from single baby households. Single child households which is kind of interesting. Well, they have problems there because there's 50 million more men than women

so they, it's just. That is crazy. There's also ghost towns they need to fill. There you go. Yeah, that's also crazy. Yeah. Yeah.

Did you guys cover something like that for Vice? Yeah, Shane did. I was in china for a month this summer to write my second book i was in chen du for about three weeks i was in shanghai for a week and i was in mongolia for a week so i was just hanging out out there seeing things it's pretty crazy what is that one town in china that's a replica of another town there's a a lot of them. There's Paris. Really? They have a replica of Paris. Nobody lives there. Nobody lives there.

It's completely empty. Completely empty. Well, 3% occupancy. Three. That must be the weirdest. They have like a Scandinavia. They have a Paris. They have like an Italian-themed one. Oh, my God.

They're fucking crazy. This is the Paris one? Yeah. Oh, my God. They're fucking crazy. This is the Paris one? Yeah. Oh, my God. Where do these people get their food? That was one of the best episodes on Vice. That's so fucking strange. The thing is, China...

Look at this. It's everything. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's Paris. The thing that interests me about that country, if you go now, though, is it's at that point in a civilization where the people may be able to catch the Matrix. Like, in America, there's Snowden, and he's great. He's this blip on the radar.

We had WikiLeaks. But as soon as there's one of those guys, the government and the Matrix, it adapts so much faster than the people. It can take care of that. It can sew up a problem. I don't know about that. The government is actually offering him. There's people in the NSA that are offering him immunity if he returns all the rest of his files. Because apparently he's only released 1% of the files that he took from the NSA.

Oh, you're saying the Chinese? Well, China's interesting to me. Like, I know what you're saying. Like, Snowden's, I love Snowden. Snowden should have won Time Person of the Year. Yeah, I agree. In my opinion, he should have fucking won Person of the Year. But China, what's interesting is there isn't this stranglehold on the local government.

The local government isn't as strong as it is in America because the tentacles of government here are refined. It really has a grip on us. It sees everything. In China, there's a lot of chaos. And people can do their own thing. and people can do their own thing. Like when you go to a bank in China, there are homies in there with just a bag of money and a calculator selling currency at a rate below the bank

and nobody goes and does business with the bank. So there's a lot of this like kind of wild, wild west economics going on out there. I lived in a Super 8 motel that a girl rented like a floor of rooms out from the Super 8, decorated them like on some Ace Hotel shit and then rented them out to foreigners and made more money. And then there's an office building that's a converted Super 8 room right next to me. Like there's just weird kooky stuff going on.

There's not as much regulation. And it's kind of cool to see because there is they don't have the freedom of Internet. They don't have that federal freedom like we have, but they do have this local freedom that is very, very interesting for me to see. Do they have an intranet, like an inner Chinese net? Yeah, China's kind of strategy is, look, there's Apple everywhere. We're going to have our own bootleg Apple.

We're going to have our own Weibo, like bootleg Twitter. We have our own telecom businesses. Their idea is we have this many people. If we just keep the money in the country, we're going to be fine. So that's what they do. They have all their own stuff. Is it as effective? Absolutely not. None of it runs as well. Do you think how crazy that is that everything

they do is a copy? That's so fucking strange. They're copying entire cities like down to the stains on the marble. Well, I tell you, America creates things, China copies things, and then Japan turns them into stuffed animals. It is weird, though. Like, what is it psychologically that makes a culture be responsible for so much duplicates? Well, because that's how they made their money.

That's their whole thing. Right, but why? Why? What caused that? What was the initial trigger that made them not have anything that they're creating themselves, that they're duplicating so many different things? You don't need to be creative there because it stems from a peasant culture, a peasant revolution. People can't afford the real thing.

So as a business person, all you have to do is create that product at the proper price point in this civilization. Yeah, because it's manufacturing. So basically, you would go over there, you would give them the IP or the technology or whatever and say, make this thing. And then they would make it, you know, nine to five. And then five to nine, they're making the number twos to sell to India or Southeast Asia or wherever else.

So that's what the whole economy is based on. And then if you look at actually the interesting one is actually PCs because it was like HP, IBM, Dell. And they all manufactured them in China. And then all of a sudden Lenovo and Acer and all these companies became the big ones. and Acer and all these companies became the big ones. It's because the factories just took the technology from like a Dell, put it out six months before Dell for $99. And so Dell couldn't compete with their own factory because they just took the shit and sold it for much cheaper.

So they just took the design and recreated it and just didn't call it a Dell. Correct. It is kind of smart, though. Yeah, it's super smart. It's very smart. Sure, if you can just steal people's ideas, it's smart. Yeah, it's totally, yeah. I always feel this way.

If people in China spent as much time trying to create something new as they do copying, it'd be probably in a better place. That's an interesting understatement. Restaurants recycle oil. probably in a better place. Because they even have like... That's an interesting understatement. Restaurants recycle oil. You know, there's just so many things they do to get around. Like, remember there was that fake lion in the zoo? They put the Tibetan dog in the zoo and called it a lion.

Have you heard of it? But have you heard the big story out of China now, the fake food story? What? Which one? So, you know, they keep finding, like, eggs now that are totally synthetic eggs, and they have the pork that they put under the thing, and it's fluorescent blue.

Yeah, I heard, yeah. And then they have the created wheat. Like, basically they have a food issue so that they've come up with, and I'm like, hold on, eggs aren't fucking expensive. I mean, you get a chicken that lays eggs. Like, isn't it more expensive to make mean, you get a chicken that lays eggs. Isn't it more expensive to make a fake egg out of chemicals and make a fake eggshell and shit?

It takes so much effort. It's like, just get the chicken to lay the eggs. So why are they doing it then? Because there's not enough eggs. So there's not enough eggs, so they're making some sort of synthetic egg out of what? Chemicals. What kind of chemicals? Here, look it up online.

Look up fake Chinese fake food. There's all kinds of what? Chemicals. What kind of chemicals? Here, look it up online. Look up fake Chinese fake food. There's all kinds of stories coming out now. Yeah, and if you just Google food safety in China, it's horrific. It's sad. I feel bad for the people. Another fake food scandal rocks China.

Yeah. Wow. How to make a rotten egg. The thing I would tell people, though, is when I read these stories, I'm like, don't judge the people. They're like, they're uninformed, and they kind of, in a lot of ways,

don't even have a chance against this. Like, I hung out with the locals there, and they're like, look, we know we're eating fake. We know we're eating recycled oil. We know it's going to kill us, and it's bad for us. But, like, we have no choice. Like, their government, it's even harder to, like, affect on a, I mean, you can harder to affect on a federal level.

Prepare a mold. They mix the right amount of resin, starch, coagulant and pigments to make their eggs white. Sodium alginate extracted from brown algae gives the egg white the wanted viscosity.

Then they add fake egg yolk from a different mix of resin and pigments. Once the proper shape is achieved, an amalgamate of paraffin was gypsum powder and calcium carbonate makes for a credible shell. It sounds like it's like a $100,000 egg.

This is fucking insane. This is fucking insane. I can't believe. There's all kinds of stories. They have fake eggs. They have this crazy, you should look up the pork one. They have the fake wheat. And the wheat is, I believe, actually poisonous.

Wow. This is bananas. And this is all just because they have not enough food. Yeah, and I think it's just, you know, look, again, to go back to how beautiful human beings are, it's a way to make money. You know, you have a factory, you figure out the shit, you manufacture millions of these eggs out of paraffin calciumate, and you sell them. Including cases of pork colored to be sold as beef, pork that glowed blue, recycled steam buns, and a tofu fermented with sewage. Oh my God.

And this is just because there's just no way to sustain that kind of a population. Oh, there's the lion from the zoo. Dude, that's a real lion, bro. There's not even no lions. It's like Beethoven didn't get a haircut. So stupid. They called that a lion, bro. There's no lions. It's like Beethoven didn't get a haircut.

So stupid. They called that a lion? Yeah. Jesus Christ. What a weird fucking country, man. And what do they do now? I mean, they're going to keep growing, and they're going to grow with more boys than they are girls.

So if people are going to have kids, like, how the fuck are 50 million extra boys going to find brides or boyfriends even but if you if you look at china if you look at china though it's interesting because when when i go to china i go to china a lot i think this is what british people must have felt like when they came to america because you would tool you would tool around america when you're from britain it's bigger it's got more people It's got all these factories where they're making tons of shit. And then you go back to England and you're like, well, we got banking and, you know, you know, we don't, we don't really build anything anymore. And you could just see it coming.

And when you go to China, they're just making shit. They're making stuff and they're selling stuff and they're building shit. Jumping off roofs. And they're fucking going crazy. But anyway, they're, they're, and they anyway, they're whatever, three times the size. So you sit there and you say, yeah, eventually they're going to get there. They're going to win. And then we're going to be Great Britain sort of saying, hello.

No, we're going to be going around going, well, now we do banking and services. And it'll be like England's a nice place and everything. But we're not going to be number one anymore. Yeah, but the military part of our number one is the craziest part, isn't it? I mean, as far as like... Well, their military is much bigger. But the thing is, we have the tech. But they're going to have the tech soon.

Why? Because we sell it to them. Right. Of course we sell it to them. There's also that thing going on in the South China Seas, though. Like that new Japan primate, he wants to militarize. That's scary, too. What's going on?

Yeah, but Japan, that's just a bunch of posh. Because Japan can't fuck with anybody. I mean, like, and they especially can't fuck with China. No one can fuck with China. Yeah, so the South China Sea, China was telling people, if you're going to fly through this zone in the South China Seas, this is our territory. You're going to notify us when we fly through.

Japan was like, we don't concede that that's your territory, nor does Korea. And then America stepped in and was like, you know, we feel like there needs to be some sort of compromise on this. So it's a disputed issue right now. I think Kerry just went over to Japan to talk to them about the issue. But, you know, have you been to China, Joe? No. It honestly is pretty cool. You should definitely go.

The people are amazing. The government is on some other shit. The government is on some... And the business people that run that country do not give a fuck about humanity. That's the problem. Isn't it a case to... I mean, I would assume at least

that when you get that amount of people that it's sort of like big cities. Big cities, people are not as valuable to each other as they are in small towns. Small towns, people are a little bit kinder to each other because they're dealing with a one-on-one person on a regular basis. Whereas in big cities,

I was talking about Jim Norton lives in Manhattan and he jokes around about how he lives in this big box filled with people and he doesn't know anybody yeah he has an apartment building he lives in he doesn't know a single one of them and it's like people aren't as valuable they're not worth as much i wonder if that's the case with a place like china it's just like when you got a billion people that's they're not it's not like a precious resource it's like there's a burden the class divide is also so crazy so you don't come into contact with someone of the lower class like the person that you're dumping those goods on, you never meet that person. Like when I lived in Chengdu, there's less of that divide. The divide is still there. But you meet people from all walks of life, even though that city is becoming one of China's largest. Those people are in touch because some of them were very poor. They opened small stores, became lower, lower middle class in China, but they still remember what it was.

If you go to Shanghai, if I bring up an argument about pollution or humanity or whatever, they're really just like, look, this place is going to be polluted. People are going to eat fake food. People are going to be sick. But there's nothing I can do, and I'm going to get paid as much as I can until I'm going to leave. And nobody wants to raise their kids there. Everybody knows the environment is not conducive to, like, raising kids. It's not conducive to living. And it's getting worse in a lot of these places.

Like, they're instructing pilots on how to land in low visibility. Well, Beijing, if you spend a lot of time in Beijing, you never see the sky. Yeah. Ever. sky. Yeah. Ever. Ever. Yep. God damn, how bad is that for your lungs? Fairly.

Horrible. I mean, they do cloud seeding. How do you feel when you leave that? It's tough, man. You can tell. You can tell. Even the water, when you take a shower sometimes, it leaves a little grayness behind.

It's bad. It's bad, man. I like how Eddie comes on the show and we just bash China for an hour. Well, I'm trying not to bash it. I kind of wish... I just hope to... I mean, I don't know how to do it.

I'm writing this book and it's really hard to write the book because you want the best for these people. And the people want... The people know what they're being subjected to, but they don't have the freedom to fly around and pick up and move somewhere else I mean they're kind of stuck where they are and they're at the mercy of this government this new this new product chairman I forget what it's called president chairman whatever he's coming in he's

doing a good job in terms of the corruption and he's taking down people at very high levels that were never exposed to trial or inspection so that's good but you you're just kind of skeptical as to is this is this just for a show are you just taking down a couple people who don't matter or are you really gonna go after this and turn this country around so who knows wow yeah i mean i love the country and i love the people it's just if you go to any if you go to any country people are nice yeah like people are like you go go someone's house and they say stay at my house and you eat some lamb and you fucking have a beer and

they're all fine but they could be at war with that you go to afghani you know afghani houses they're super nice i was in daghestan everybody's super nice to you they want to kill, you know, Afghani houses. They're super nice to you. I was in Dagestan. Everybody's super nice to you. They want to kill you, you know, philosophically or like your country. Like Dagestan is basically a terrorist university, right? Because they've been trying to separate from Russia for so long. You know, there's this war in Chechnya. Everybody came over to Dagestan. So you have this small little country that's continually at war with the Russians and the Russians are like sending the special forces, the Spetsnaz down, you know, and the Spetsnaz guys just kidnap people and cut off their heads. And so the, because of this happening, like the young men go into the forest, quote unquote, which is to join the insurgency. And there's so many of them

that now they're surfacing in Syria and Afghanistan. Here in America, the Boston bombers, the older one, Tamerlan, went to Dagestan for six months before the bombing. And Russia, obviously, in Denmark and Czech Republic, all these Dagestani terrorists are sort of coming out. And, you know, it's because, you know, they're fighting they're fighting for, for global jihad, for global Sharia and, and they, they, they, it's like a one-way ticket. They go and they literally go into the force and learn from the best terrorists, how to be the best terrorists in the, in the world. And then they go around the world and, and, and commit their, their crimes. Um, but when I was there, so, so these people are, are are theoretically like they hate me you know

because i'm there with a camera going where did the boston bomber go and you know and so and so you think they would hate me but they're like come in you know fucking have lamb our son was kidnapped you know my daughter became a black widow we want to tell you the story have some tea you know sit down we want to tell you we want to tell you we want to tell you but meanwhile the whole place is basically sort of on this you know civil war that's sort of bubbling and because of that you know it's just like all the young men are just learning how to fuck shit up and how to kill people etc etc is there anything to it besides just terror like when you meet these people like i mean i've never met one i'm just curious like through your eyes what it's like are they just like one layer it's incredibly

simple it's incredibly simple we just did a thing called children of the drones it's fucking fascinating if i do say so myself but uh i don't know what i'm not supposed to be telling these we haven't aired them yet but but there's two things. One was me and Dagestan, the other was Children of the Drones. What happens is, you have a brother, or a cousin, or whatever, your best friend, whatever it is, he just disappears.

One day he's just gone. And because of the insurgency, the special forces can do whatever the fuck they want. And so they just, oh, you don't look right, or you went to this mosque, or you have a beard, or I just don't like you, whatever the fuck they want. And so they just, oh, you don't look right. Or you went to those, this mosque, or you have a beard. I just don't like you, whatever the fuck it is. And they kidnap you, right? And they kill you generally or torture you or whatever. You just disappear. So imagine when you're 19 and you're a hothead and you're, you know, fucking want to fuck shit up and whatever, and your best friend or your brother or your dad or whatever gets

kidnapped. What the fuck are you going to do?'re gonna do you're gonna say i'm gonna fucking fuck shit up and then there's a whole bunch of guys who are waiting for you in the forest where you go in there and they say here's a gun and i'm gonna train you how to build bombs and you're gonna go fucking blow the motherfuckers up who killed your dad and it's just it's very simple like everyone talks about ideology or it's this or it's you know global Sharia or all this stuff. The fact of the matter is they just killed your dad, so I'm going to fuck you up, especially in these countries where that's part of the culture. Like if you blood for blood.

Same thing with children or the drones. We became enamored with drones because our boys don't get killed, and we just send them in in and there's no collateral damage and all this stuff. Surgical. And of course it's bullshit. And there's lots of collateral damage. And these people know that computers are basically killing their brothers and their sisters and their dad and their mom. So we went to Pakistan and we're like, why is everybody joining the Taliban? There's more Taliban in Pakistan than there is in fucking Afghanistan.

And the drones go. They kill somebody's family. why is everybody joining the Taliban? There's more Taliban in Pakistan than there is in fucking Afghanistan. And, you know, the drones go, they kill somebody's family, and then the Taliban says, see, these fucking motherfuckers are killing us by remote control. And this one woman who runs a school to de-radicalize Taliban dudes is like, for every drone attack,

you have a hundred new recruits to the Taliban. And of those hundred new recruits, they will be suicide bombers who will go to America, who will go to American troops and will fucking blow themselves up. Every fucking drone attack. And it's very simple. You killed my dad. I'm now going to kill you.

So this imbalance in terms of warfare, there's a yin and a yang to life. And this imbalance is causing this massive buildup that one day is going to slap us in the face. Yeah, we are training right now in Dagestan and in Pakistan 100 Al-Qaedas. And the irony is we went into Afghanistan 11 years ago

to take away the bases, to get Al- get Al-Qaeda, to get Taliban out because they were giving sanctuary to Al-Qaeda. And now, because of the process that we're doing, we're making 100 more Al-Qaedas. And the sort of whole cyclical thing is staggering. It's fucking bananas, man. That's such a crazy statistic. If you really think about the possibility

that that's true 100 for every drone attack and there's a lot of goddamn drone attacks and the number of people that are killed that are civilians it's pretty high yeah this this may sound stupid shane but i'm just curious is this for these people like it's purely just hate and revenge like if they somehow came to power let's say like what is the objective is that it is the objective just to make other people feel the pain that they felt from these drone attacks or i mean well there's there's not trying to give like credibility no there's ideological stuff and there's and there's there's philosophy obviously but the majority of it is young men by and large and now in dagestan more more and more women, whose families, husbands, wives.

I know if you fucking kidnapped my wife and killed her, I would go apeshit. If you kidnap my kids, if a computer fucking model airplane killed my children, I would blow the fucking shit up. I would go fucking apeshit. So it's not unnatural for them to do that to say i'm and especially if you're young and you don't have a future and you know a lot of them are illiterate and are told by their mullahs you know what you're going to go to heaven if you blow yourself up you're like this is a good thing if you go attack these guys and so it's not like they're going to get in trouble it's not like they're going to go to jail or any of this shit because they're going

to die and then they're going to go to heaven so there's all that stuff wrapped up into it too what happens when civilians are killed when i'm sorry i'm sorry one other thing is if you had a bunch of taliban invade america you know with long beards and and and sort of turbans how many americans would fight to the death to get those guys out i mean we've seen it. All we would need is Texas. But I'm just saying, so you have that. You have that. And everyone would fight to the death. And so you're like, well, that's what they're doing there.

Like we are, we are in like, we invade them and then occupy their country. So they're just saying, I'm going to kill you just for that. Let alone go to heaven. Let alone the fact that you killed my brother. Yeah. Wow. And there's no, I mean, how do you argue against that? If you killed a bunch of people that actually are innocents, what I was going to say is what's the process when innocents are killed by drones? Is there apologies? Do they get paid? No, no. And, and the other thing that's interesting about that is, so we, we interviewed the drone pilots and they're like crying and I killed people

and it fucked me up. And then we interview the kids and they're crying and everyone's crying. And so you're, you know, and then we interview Taliban, kids who joined the Taliban and they're like, you know,

there has to be recompense. You can't just fucking kill us all the fucking time. And so they joined the Taliban and they will fuck up anything with an American flag. it's and look i understand i understand it though it's like even if you paid and there's recompense like hey i killed your mom i rebuilt you a house like who the fuck's gonna live in it right i don't think there's anything you can do like the drone strikes is just yeah we're unconscionable they're totally unconscionable but once there has been

casualties and those casualties are ignored that almost seems like a strategy to try to fuel the enemy. I mean, it really almost seems so short-sighted. You know, we could chalk it off to incompetence, which is most likely that. But if you can't look at the consequences of that incompetence and see that this is going to cause a bunch of people to be vengeful. Well, it's cheap. You don't have to train the pilot. You don't have to have a big jet. It's a cheap little drone that has missiles or a machine gun or whatever.

And it's what we see is in common with everything we've talked about, global warming, fake food. Everybody just wants to pass the bill to the next generation and the next generation because they figure, well, I don't have to deal with these people right now. Yeah, and also what they don't realize is, well, fuck it. It's in Pakistan. They can't come get me here. and as we've learned from al-qaeda they fucking can and they will oh jesus fucking christ are there answers shane well that's but i i i look it the first thing is to know what the problems are and then once we this is why global warming everything at somebody

and even by the way even if global warming isn't true which it is but even if it isn't and i and i say this to the climate change deniers all the time i'm like even if it's a five fucking percent chance that this is all gonna gonna you know fucking fuck up we're all gonna die don't you want to hedge your bets rather than saying this for sure is not happening? Even if there's a 1% chance, don't you want to fucking hedge your bets just as a smart fucking person? Anyway, but first of all, you have to say, what is the problem? And by the way, as humans, we don't want to say what is the problem. We have to say what is the problem, and then you can say, let's fix it. For example, and I don't know if I've told this story, and you can stop me if I have,

but one of the most interesting things I did recently is I went to the Zeitgeist Conference, which is the Google Conference, and they had this kid there who's like 18 years old, and he built the first reactor in his garage when he was like 13. And he came up with this way of finding like radioactive, like it's like a Geiger counter, but they do it with like water is the basis. So it's so big that they can do like ports. If they were tankers with illegal radioactive material, they could figure out these ports. This kid came up with them when he was 16. His new technology that he was pitching,

and by the way, my jaw was dropping, is to take all the spent radioactive fuel, you you know the shit that we can't dispose of it's got 50 000 years shelf life we can only guarantee its safety for 100 years all the spent fuel from all our reactors he's got this technology that that he can theoretically and i don't know you know i haven't verified this because i'm not a nuclear physicist but uh he can take that spent fuel power his his fail-safe reactors that cannot whatever be bad down to where they have no uh radiation left in them because because the the fuel rods we actually only use like 90 uh sorry uh seven percent so there's 93 you know left in them when

we when we put them away and that so he can take them down to when they're benign and and fuel the world for the next 20 000 years and i'm like'm like, and by the way, I believed it. But even if it's bullshit, like that's the technology we should be going for. That's the kind of shit that we should be saying, yes, please, let's take all the fucking bad, evil shit that we buried in the ground that we can't even take that up, power these reactors and have 20,000 years of fucking energy. Even if he doesn't have it, we should that exactly how much science has been done i mean have you have you read any of the the work that's been done to try to well so this he's he's like he's like the the

the sort of boy phenom of of of physics he's backed by the like you know uh bill gates and and you know buffettett and the Google guys. I mean, he's sort of like a vetted kid. He's a famous, you know, brain about this stuff. I'm pretty sure that they're not going to just say, come spew bullshit to a bunch of fucking, you know, old people. But again, I have not verified it, but this is his theory. Someone should look him up online or figure it out or whatever.

But when I heard that, I'm like, again, even if it isn't true, that's the type of shit that we should be going for because once we realize that if global warming is true which it is if we have to cut carbon emissions by 80 which we can't then you need to have this technology which says okay all of the fuel is there we don't have to no one has to pay for energy anymore because 20 000 years of fuel is in these spent reactors that we don't have to pay for. Yeah, but that shit's going to get moved around on trucks that are going to be driven by guys

on meth and they're going to fucking go off the road. But that's what the gas companies are going to say because they're going to want us to take like 50 to 100 years to institute the technology. Yo, the gas companies are going to hire drivers to be on meth and make sure they crash. They're going to give these dudes meth. Yes. So they crash the truck're going to give these dudes meth. Yes. Hold on a second. I'm trying to get away

from your doom and gloom shit and say, yes, Joe, you're right. We can fucking be better. We can be better, but it's not this way. Traveling around with fucking truckloads of nuclear waste. Whoa.

Bring the machine to the waste. Exactly. Oh, it's not happening. Why not? Bring the machine to the waste. This is a goddamn mess. They're going to drive nuclear waste through the middle goddamn mess. They're going to drive nuclear waste through the middle of America.

They're going to have trucks full of death just hurling through your town at 40 miles an hour. Well, they already, by the way, they already do. I mean,

we've been doing it for 50 fucking years. A red-eyed skinny man whose hair is falling out like fucking fall leaves because he's just radiated the fuck. Oh, now he's lost it.

Radiated and unmet. Just fucking gunning it through Main Street, ignoring lights like a Stephen King movie. Just red-eyed. See, why would you want to bring kids into that? Red-eyed, skinny, and with a fucking hammer to the floor. Rattling bars in their back. You know someone's writing this all down right now. It's going to be a movie in six months. I hope it is. I like movies.

Truck carrying extremely dangerous radioactive material found after it was stolen in Mexico. Um, hey. Don't they have, like, at least one guard? You should have a couple of dudes with machine guns when you're carrying around nuclear waste in the back of a truck going to Mexico. Jesus Christ. There was a famous story of a bunch of guys in Brazil broke into a hospital to steal shit. And they stole like a safe for scrap metal. like a safe for scrap metal.

And the safe was where they kept the cesium, which is, you know, it's radioactive material that they use for treating tumors and stuff. And they had a high-speed chase through the town, and they had sort of cracked open the safe. And all the cesium was sort of, this white powder was sort of falling out around the town as the cops were chasing them. And they had to take the whole town brick by brick and bury it

under fucking concrete and lead because it radiated the whole fucking thing and this is just from a hospital they had to take the whole town apart and bury it under under like lead and and concrete how long did that take so look my my whole thing is, I'm terrified. I'm terrified of that shit. But I'm like, and I don't believe we know what we're doing with the technology. I'm terrified of it all.

I'm terrified of proliferation. However, if you can take all those spent fucking fuel rods and power the world, then at least, shouldn't we give that a fucking shot? Yes, if we can really do that. I'm just joking around, obviously,

about the gas companies fueling people up with meth. But, if they can, you know, I mean, I guarantee you, it's going to be just like trying to get medical marijuana legal. The pharmaceutical companies are going to lobby against it because they know they're going to lose money. So the gas companies

are going to lobby against this because they know it's going to cost them money. And they'll play dirty because you're dealing with billions of dollars. But when President Rogan is there, it's going to cost them money. Correct. And they'll play dirty because you're dealing with billions of dollars. But when President Rogan is there, he's going to make it happen. Dude, President Rogan, please.

People will have to be immortal and I'm going to have to do it remotely from Mars. That's when President Rogan runs everything from the internet from Mars. It's fucking,

Earth will be a wasteland by then. Everyone will be gone. Mars will be like the gated community of space. Yeah, all fucking terraformed with fake plants growing everywhere. Everyone eating fake Chinese eggs.

That'll be the day when people say the hills and they're talking about Mars. That's it. Is the hills a subject anymore? Who's talking about the hills? Some people are talking to me about the hills.

I fucking plug my ears and I walk away. Well, I've been in LA for three weeks now and people are like, there's a party in the hills. We're going to the hills. Oh, I see. I thought and I walk away. Well, I've been in LA for three weeks now and people are like, there's a party in the hills. We're going to the hills. Oh, I see.

I thought you meant the show. It was a show called The Hills, right? Yeah. Wasn't that the one with the fucking, the girl who got all the plastic surgery? Yeah. Thank you. You mean the Hollywood Hills.

Yeah. Dude, the Hollywood Hills are terrible, but what they're amazing for is that fucking view at night. It's not like anywhere else in the world. If you get high above Doheny, I had a buddy who used to have a house on Doheny. It's incredible. That view is like Blade Runner because you see the grid, the light grid at night. It looks like shit during the day.

It looks like dog shit because you just see gray buildings and fucking smog. But at nighttime, it looks like a science fiction movie. It's incredibly beautiful. Like way more beautiful than the neon lights of Vegas because it's oddly symmetrical. It's really fascinating. Right. Because they're right above it.

It's like the perfect height above it for this amazing light show. I got to see that. Yeah, it's dope. It's a great place to live. But as far as places that you would want to actually live other than for that view, fucking Hollywood Hills. It's fairly douchey. It's not just douchey. It's dangerous.

I know two people that have been home invaded up there. Fuck off. Oh, yeah, man. There's a whole scam with people watching your house. People park cars and case houses. Really? Sure. Well, there was a guy that was selling a house up there.

It's a fascinating story. And for a very brief time, I thought about living up there. I was like, man, it'd be nice if I was closer to the comedy store. I could just get down to the comedy store in 10 minutes. I mean, that would be kind of nice. So it's just a fucking, just not a committed thought at all. Just a, hmm, that's the view. That's how spectacular that looks.

Look at that shit up there. That's really what it looks like from my boy's house it was incredible his was even better than that his was a little lower he's like on the edge of what we're looking you're looking down at some houses and then that he was at the edge so all he saw was the grid and it was just magnificent so anyway this guy had this pretty nice house up there and he had a really pretty view like that and i was thinking about about it, but I was like, man, I just don't like that this house is so showy. And it's like right on the street. Like, anyone could just walk. I mean, it's

literally, you could throw a person from the sidewalk and slam through the window. You could pick someone up and use them as a rock to hurl through this guy's window. I was like, that just doesn't make any sense to me. And he's like, well, it's got a state-of-the-art security system. I go, what, these cameras? You know what that is? And he's like well it's got a state of the art security system I go what These cameras

You know what that is I go you're going to get a video of a dude with a ski mask robbing you This is what I said to him Two weeks later he was dead He was shot in the neck In a home invasion In that very house Yeah he's like hookers this guy

We used to call him wild man I had a buddy who worked at a strip club and this dude used to come in and he apparently Invented like bell bottoms or something nutty like that like he invented something and made a fuckload of money Don't do out calls if you live in a glass house. Yeah, and he was getting a emphysema because of his What are you doing dude it's just showing stuff like you're talking about oh okay that does the same thing um he was um he was getting emphysema from cigarettes and so he decided to quit the cigarettes and his doctor told him look if you have to smoke smoke marijuana at least it's not going to kill you so this dude starts smoking marijuana and decides he

doesn't want to work anymore decides all he wants to do from now on, he wants to play his guitar, and then he wants to get prostitutes. So he's got a lot of money, and he thinks he's almost dead, right, because he had emphysema. So he goes to strip clubs and starts paying girls to have sex with him.

Like, incredible money, like $3,000, $4,000, $5,000. What do I got to pay you? Crazy gravelly cigarette voice. And apparently he was really rude to these girls. And one of them came over to his house and brought a guy. And the guy came in and robbed him and shot him in the neck. And this was the very house that I was telling him, you're going to get robbed by a dude with a ski mask.

And they're going to get a nice video of that. And no one's ever going to catch that guy. This is like the heaviest podcast ever. Well, he was a weird guy, man, this guy, wild man. Because when you hear the mean shit that he would say to the girls or even about the girls, it didn't make you sympathetic to him. But on the other hand, a guy shouldn't get shot in the neck in his house. I don't know what the circumstances were.

I don't know if he had a comment. I don't know what the circumstances were. I don't know if he had a comment. I don't know what the fuck happened. But I do know that the Hollywood Hills gets broken into a lot. I had another friend who lived up there who caught a guy trying to break into his house in the middle of the night. Oh, good. There's a lot of that.

A lot of that up there. It's a tricky spot. It's a tricky spot because it's so affluent and so accessible. You drive three minutes, you're on sunset, you go left, you go right, you go down, you go up, you're gone. So someone could sneak in from a bad neighborhood, slip up there. It's not like Beverly Hills where they have constant drives where the cops are constantly cruising the neighborhood,

making sure there's no suspicious people and all that. The Hollywood Hills, everybody's driving up there and wandering around. It gets sketch. Ice-T got held up up there. Ice-T used to have a house in the Hollywood Hills. He got home invaded. He got held up gun. It's pretty common.

I didn't know it was like that. It's a lot of money. Whenever you have a lot of money, you see some of those houses up there. They're fucking beautiful, beautiful houses. You look at a house like that, okay, that house is worth seven million dollars so this motherfucker in this house got seven million dollars he's got some other shit in there too yeah so you wait until someone's closing their garage and then you run out of the bushes and boom you're in the garage and you can't get up there fast cops can't get up there fast you can't see it you're covered how are you gonna call the cops too you don't get

cell phone signal in your fucking house that's why why Eddie is staying at the Motel 8. That's a good move. Super 8. Super 8's all done up. I'm just hanging out with the people that robbed him. That's it. Well, as the economy gets, there's a further and further gap between people with money and people without money.

It becomes more and more dangerous to flaunt it like that, especially in the middle of a city. True. That's why I always freaked out about Hancock Park. Hancock Park has these insanely beautiful homes. The insanely beautiful old world, old Hollywood houses. These giant mansions. A friend of mine went over this guy's house and she said that he has a theater in his

house, a full theater with velvet curtains and incredible gold guild work and the house is built in the 20s like some fucking carrie grant guy built it and he said it's amazing and it's fucking five blocks from east la right five blocks from a store where all the signs are in spanish you know and you're you know you're living in this crazy stupid mansion mansion that's so close to abject poverty. That's what you get for stunting on people. That's exactly what you get. It's dangerous. But speaking about Florida, I always think that when I go to Miami, right?

Because you go on one side of the, and it's like baby blue Bentleys and, and like these crazy like penthouse, like $20 million places. And literally on the other side, it's like El Salvadorian, Guatemalan, sort of like, you know, 99 cent pupusas kind of thing. And you're like, why don't these dudes from this side of the street, who by the way, have grown up in El Salvador and they're not sort of any stranger to hard times, walk across and just take the guy's fucking car. Why wouldn't you do that? Well, because they're honorable people,

and they're happy they're not in El Salvador. They don't want to get arrested in America so they get kicked out. I would do it. If I was broke and starving, I would go across. They're here to make their own dreams come true, not to steal the dreams of another man. If I was poor and starving, and some guy's driving a car worth $250,000, I would take it. Right. But are they poor and starving, and some guy's driving a car worth 250 grand,

I would take it. Right. But are they poor and starving, or are they just poor? I would be starving. Yeah, you'd have to be starving. Most people are just poor. Right, right.

The poor and starving number's pretty small, I think. I wouldn't take it, but I would definitely take a shit on your hood. How dare you? Because I just want to fuck your shit up, but I don't want to steal it. Why be a hater like that why shit on a man's hood the guy works so hard to get a nice car and he decides to keep it in

the neighborhood and what do you do you shit on his hood like a big hater brings me no enjoyment but my shit on that hood is brings me oh well that's because you got a hater mentality i'm a hater he should give you enjoyment because she should give you hope you should look at that and say look this asshole can make that money what's why is he better than me he's not so this is inspiration use it for fuel go out and get your own car oh no i would be inspired but i would shit on his car all you're gonna think about is man i hope i don't have a car like this or some asshole like me is gonna come along and shit on it no i would be like i can't wait till the day there's some asshole like me that shits on my car when i have because when you have that car you're like i'm glad you mad

that's i'm so glad you're mad and i'm not glad enough that someone steps on your hood dents your fucking hood and then shits on it that is just rude disrespect for property and you can't sell that anytime i can't sell that in america anymore when i buy a car now i'm just gonna expect that someone one day will shit on this hood they're like they i listen to joe rogan i'm gonna go find his car shit on his oh that is so like, I listen to Joe Rogan, I'm going to go find his car and shit on his hood. Oh, that is so rude. I can't even believe you put that out there. Because it's going to come back

and it's going to land right in your fucking dashboard. Someone's going to take your windshield out. Someone's going to make a music video now about shitting on people's cars. They're going to punch a hole straight through your dashboard, just straight through your windshield so they can shit directly onto your dashboard. How dare you?

How dare you even think like that? The upper-decker sunroof shit? That's even the more pro move. Yeah, well, really, if you want to shit in your own hand, then smear it in that upper part where you can never clean it out. That's what I'm saying. If you want to really fuck up a guy's car. But why would you do that, man?

Because it's bad energy. I'm in the run-off. That's bad energy. You're doing well. You don't need to do this. You're a successful man. True. You can't be hating on some dude with a Bentley. That's bad energy. That's bad energy. You're doing well. You don't need to do this. You're a successful man. You can't be hating on some dude with a Bentley. That's just ridiculous.

It's a shitty car. It's going to break down on him anyway. It's going to leave him on the side of the highway. I got a friend who has a Rolls Royce. It breaks. It breaks. It breaks all the time. Things go wrong.

AC gets stuck on. This fucking thing goes wrong. Radio doesn't work. This speaker's out out it's a fucking rolls royce that doesn't make sense it breaks i always you can buy like you know on lincoln you can buy these sort of old like you know shit brown 70s rollers for like five grand and every time i go to vegas i'm like i gotta come back with a brick or two and just buy a shit brown roller and get like a punk kid with a safety pin through his neck or, you know, MS-13 kid to just drive me around town. Sort of roll up to the bars in my shit brown 77 Rolls Royce and be like, am I late for the party? And, you know, just have this kid, you know, with facial tattoos be my driver.

That's not a bad move. It would make people uncomfortable. I wouldn't shit on that hood if that kid was driving. You would let that slide? Yeah, I would just be like, live. Well, you wouldn't shit on the hood of a 1977 car anyway. No, that car, I would respect that whip. I know a dude, Cliffy B. from Epic Games,

he was telling us that he had a Lamborghini Aventador. It's like $400,000 plus. Oh, shit. It broke. Door handle broke. He had to climb in from his girlfriend's side. Or she had to climb over and open up his door. Just stop.

Yeah, no. If I spent that much money on a car, it needs to make my dick bigger and fix all my problems in life. Well, it's a goddamn spaceship, that Lamborghini. But it's just so ridiculous that you can't make it not break. The fuck, man. Jesus Christ. You're getting angry over there. I'm a little mad.

I'm a little mad they can't get it together. Expensive cars should not break. They do, though. Those are the ones that break. You know what doesn't break? Honda Accords. Those motherfuckers are bulletproof. Because if they break, then they do a recall.

Yeah, get yourself a Subaru and drive through the snow. You'll never get stuck. Look at that. There's a Lamborghini Aventador. I mean, that might as well be a goddamn spaceship. Is that a Murcielago? No, it's an Aventador broken down in London. Oh, it's broken down.

Ha, ha, ha. That's hilarious. Yeah, they break, man. They're not really designed to be used. They're just cool. They're just a massive feat of engineering and twisted steel all quartered together with fucking screws. And they just stomp on that explosion box they call an engine and hope it all stays together as it rattles apart. Plus, it's built by guineas.

Don't trust my people. My people are not to be trusted with with very like fine technical things I mean Ferrari the only reason why they keep it together is their rich heritage and racing and their ego and winning racing because if you take all that out of the loop they're a bunch of guineas to a bunch of guineas building cars you really trust them they're gonna stare at some chicks ass walking by and forget a screw and your fucking wheel's gonna go flying off when you're on turn three i mean you guys are the only people that originally borrowed technology from chinese people

this is one where a guy gets hit by a car if you back that up you can see it you didn't see it in this video look at this boom that guy turns right into him like a spastic. The dude has it right away, too, and boom! And that's a $488,000 car. Yeah, it's snapped in half. Apparently, the cars are designed to break away like that in the event of a serious collision. That's an Aventador. Oh, that's the carbon fiber one. The Lamborghini Aventador.

Wow. They're made by guineas. They take long breaks in the middle of the day. They take naps. They drink wine at work. Those people are fucking savages. All they're thinking about is putting that car together and making enough money so they can just fuck for six months. Great tracksuits, though.

Yeah, they make good tracksuits. They wear them well. Asics. Tracksuits still fly in New York. LA has not embraced the tracksuit Never did If you like show up And you're hanging around in a tracksuit

They assume you're either Armenian Or you're from New York Armenians can rock a tracksuit in LA They're great man I don't fuck with buttons or zippers anymore Smart I should have been on that a long time ago Cause I'm not scared of a fanny pack

And a fanny pack with a tracksuit Is an excellent combination. I'd rather just be fat and wear elastic bands and look awesome in purple. How about even if you're skinny? It's still comfortable. I'm just going to wear pajamas.

Dude, fuck yeah. I'm just wearing weather-resistant pajamas. That's the best. Rondi Dangerfield back in the Dizzee used to go on stage. Rondi would wear a bathrobe,

nothing on underneath and with slippers and just walk on stage And it was because you know it prevented. I think it prevented You know anybody from taking him seriously because he's not out there with a suit on I mean right away You're like you're laughing you're like look at Rodney. He opened shirt, so you know it was obvious It was nothing on underneath there wearing slippers But it was also he was so loose because he came out there with a bathrobe on that he was just giving no fucks. Powerful Rodney Dangerfield.

Powerful Rodney Dangerfield. And that was an original move. I never heard anybody doing that before him. And he did it later in his career. So it was most likely born out of one day he was backstage in his bathrobe. And they said, Rodney, you're on. And he's like, okay, I'm on. So he just fucking put it. Look, there're on. And he's like, okay, I'm on.

Look, there he is. That's how he used to walk. And his package was always hanging out. Apparently he had a monster hog, too. He didn't give a fuck. Meat peeping Rodney Dangerfield. Wasn't it Red Skelton or something? Who was the guy who had the famous... Milton Berle. Milton Berle, famous for his giant hog

and his love of stolen jokes. He's a famous joke thief with a giant hog. That was the word back in the day. But I think joke thief was a different sort of thing back then. I think they all had like gags and they used them, they interchanged them. Like a guy would work the cat skills

and another guy would work... They would do like a lot of the same material. There was nobody writing anything down back then. There was no blogs where people could shit on you the same material. There was nobody writing anything down back then. There was no blogs where people could shit on you for doing that. There was also... If you steal someone's joke now, is it a big deal? Yeah, if you get caught stealing someone's joke now, you're fucked. Really?

Yeah, this is a... By who? By the internet. The internet will find out and they'll expose it and I think people won't take you seriously. What about your man Shia LaBeouf? Yeah, were we talking about that on the podcast or was it before the podcast?

No, before. Before the podcast. Yeah. Yeah. Apparently he made a short film and it's almost an entire verbatim ripoff, including the imagery of some old comic book. Really? Yeah.

Yeah. Joe was telling me about it. Sounded. Yeah. I was like, damn. He got caught. Yeah, he got caught. And what did he say?

I don't know. I mean, he's pulling it down. And I don't know if he's actually made a public, I'm sure, if I just Google Shia. I forgive it. I loved him in Transformers. Okay, let's, plagiarism, plagiarism. Yep, that's it. That is my favorite thing to do in L.A., though.

People try to, like, stun on you at parties about their new projects like oh I have a project with so and so and I'll just pick their worst movie and be like I loved him in Transformers or I loved him in Van Wilder like that's my favorite thing to do someone was telling me about what do they do

they'll just be like oh I got this guy and I'm doing this new movie with him and you're gonna see him in a whole new light and I was like you know what I'd love to see Ryan Reynolds in Van Wilder 2 wow okay

in a series of tweets he admitted on Tuesday like, you know what I'd love to see? Ryan Reynolds in Van Wilder 2. Wow, okay. In a series of tweets, he admitted on Tuesday that he fucked up, in quotes, by failing to acknowledge that the short film he passed off as an original work

was actually inspired by, if not an entire rip-off, of a graphic novella written by artist Daniel Close. Wow. By way of apology, LeBouf, is that how you say it?

LeBouf? Yeah, that's what he deserves, LeBouf. He tweeted in that his excitement and naivete as an amateur filmmaker, he got lost in the creative process and neglected to follow proper accreditation. Wow, that's nonsense. I want Alec Baldwin to release a statement about this. Naivete and excitement may well have played their part in this fairly brazen breach of etiquette, but considering LeBou's previous run-ins with plagiarism, oh my God, he did something else. What did this guy do before? What was he accused of before?

But stealing dang clouds, you're going to get caught. I mean, he's a famous dude. Yeah, well, this guy's not that smart. Actors think they're way smarter than they are they get really confused because everybody listens to them on the set and that's how they judge

like their like their ecosystem like oh well obviously I'm a fucking big deal but no you're a big deal on a set and people are delusional

or you're delusional because people are they're not being honest with you and then you go to a red carpet thing and they're not you know you're doing Transformers everybody people are not being honest with you. You're awesome. And then you go to a red carpet thing and they're not, you know, you're doing Transformers.

Everybody's throwing fucking softballs at you. So you're super confused as to where you are in the world. So you think, oh, I'll just rip off this fucking old school-y comic book. I mean, him and Bumblebee are still legends to me, too. It's a real recent comic book, too. 2007 comic. Yeah. Dumb fuck.

What a dumb fuck copying isn't particularly creative creative work being inspired by someone else's idea to produce something new and different is creative work what does that mean that's one of the dumbest things i've ever that's like the weirdest and that's the weirdest admission slash ego chest puff copying isn't particularly creative work being inspired by someone else's work to produce something new and different is creative work but but he copied and he also said i didn't mean to copy i forgot to acknowledge it but uh i was creative anyway and they're also saying that his apology might have been plagiarized. No way. Yes.

His apology apparently looks familiar to someone else's apology for doing that. Oh, my goodness. Oh, he took the Picasso quote is what they're trying to say. No. Something like that. Did he say that? I guess he paraphrased. No, that's nitpicking. No. Did he say that? I guess he paraphrased.

No, that's nitpicking. Yeah. Unless they have a better example than that. I mean, if he plagiarized an apology, I actually would have given him props. I'm like, that's amazing. That's talent that you thought to plagiarize an apology. Like, you're so cold and don't give a fuck that I now love you. Yeah, maybe he puts blinders on and just fucking plows right through it.

Oh, he put this. Merely copying isn't particularly creative work, although it's useful in training practice. Being inspired by someone else's idea to produce something new and different is creative work, and it may have even rationalized this stolen concept. Oh, my God, he did steal it. Wow, from now on?

Four years ago. Look at that. Answered four years ago. You scumbag. Oh, he's steal it. Wow. From now on. Four years ago. Look at that. Answered four years ago. You scumbag. Oh, he's one of those guys. He's one of those guys. He doesn't have his own thoughts. Next time I get in an argument, I'm going to just plagiarize Shia LaBeouf's apologies

and start sending them via email to people. Well, that makes sense because that's sort of how I perceive a lot of actors. I always perceive a lot of actors being completely delusional and also being completely fraudulent, like not giving you who they really are, but giving you what they think would be nice if you thought of them. And that's clearly what he did by not just plagiarizing, but by plagiarizing the fucking apology.

That's obviously. He, this dumb fuck, even capitalized the is as well. He's such a dumb cunt. He didn't. He caught plagiarizing Charles Bukowski? Holy shit. Oh, my God. Is this the old problem that he had?

From six hours ago. Oh, Jesus Christ. How did he plagiarize Bukowski? I don't even want to know. Fuck this dummy. He stole the plot from poet Charles Bukowski and author Benoit. I'm not going to say that. Oh, who cares?

I'm going to bootleg a Yan Can Cook episode and turn it in, Shane, and then send you Shia LaBeouf's apology via email. And capitalize is as well. That's what comedians are actually going to use. I'm sorry, I forgot to credit Martin Yan for this episode. He plagiarized his fucking apology from Yahoo Answers. You dummity dumb dum dum. But you were right earlier.

You said, look, you do anything on the internet. Yeah, you can't get away with that kind of stupid shit, right? All day he's been retweeting people's apologies, like major apologies over the last couple years, like Tiger's major apology in 2009. Kanye's response to Taylor Swift

when he took over. What is he doing? He's retweeting them? He's just doing that to try to cover up the fact that he got caught plagiarizing not just somebody's work but an apology. He's now victimizing himself. Well, I don't think he's doing that. I think he's just throwing a bunch of fucking decoys up in the air.

I mean, he's just tweeting a bunch of shit. Oh, yeah, that? Well, I also tweeted Kanye West's apology. I also tweeted... That is the best way to get people distracted, though, is if you're in some shit right now. Like, hey, have you seen this Kanye West interview? That's kind of the easiest way to get people distracted, though, is if you're in some shit right now. Like, hey, have you seen this Kanye West interview? Yeah. Like, that's kind of the easiest way to get people distracted.

That's a good way. Yeah. Which is the Kanye? Which one? Any of them. Him calling himself Michelangelo. You don't got the answers, Shane. You don't got the answers.

I'm Michelangelo in the flesh. We need the Medici's. The Medici family is going to step up and recognize. I'm in the flesh. Nike is a slave master. I was like, what the fuck, dude? Rap stars are the rock stars, and I'm the biggest one. That's so silly.

You don't get to be the biggest one if you say that, because that's not something you would ever imagine Mick Jagger saying. Right. Do you think that Bono from U2 would ever say that? No, rock stars don't say that. They just live it. You live it, you don't let everybody else say it. When you start saying it yourself, you're not that. That's not you. You're not that bad

because of real bad motherfuckers, bad motherfucker across the board. And bad motherfuckers don't brag like that. Especially saying stupid shit like I'm Michelangelo, I'm Disney. No, you're not because they wouldn't say that. They're not comparing themselves to previous people in some

loudy-shouty sort of way. That's silly. You're fucking selling white t-shirts, son. The idea behind it is preposterous. That a guy's gonna yell out that he's not getting his just due. That he's the Disney and he's the Steve Jobs.

He's like, come on, man. No, you're not. That's exactly proof that you're not because you're saying you are. The guys who are don't say they're somebody like that. They just do. The funniest reason, too, is that his reason for being so mad and talking about being a new slave is because he can't break into fashion. Yeah.

It makes no fucking sense. It doesn't have to make sense. It's all fueled by ego. Yeah. It's just this massive river of ego that he has to damn up. Doesn't he want to do like high-end female sort of stuff? Yeah. And you're like, hold on.

Who gives a fuck? You want to design dresses? But it's so who gives a fuck. Because it's like, why are you yelling about that on a rap radio station? And also, if you're going to dress like Kim Kardashian, it doesn't take much. Just take some Reynolds wrap, clear Reynolds wrap, and wrap it around that bitch. That is the best thing she will look in. Do you really believe that?

She will look the best in that. Do you really don't, you don't think that there's like probably a dress that would be better than Saran Wrap? No. I think her and Saran Wrap would be amazing.

I think there's a problem with Saran Wrap and a big problem is that the shit is hard to get off. Oh. You gotta like fucking rip it and pull it.

Oh no, I mean just wrap in a circle and then go into the bottom. A dress you just hike that sucker up. And if you fuck a girl who's covering surround wrap, that bitch is gonna be sweaty.

It's gonna be like rivers of sweat coming out of the lower back and sweat all over her ass. I don't know. I thought it was amazing, man. I was at this pimps and hoes party

in high school and I put this girl up that was doing a keg stand and she just wore Reynolds wrap with no underwear and I was like, this is the best dress ever. Hold on, hold on, hold on.

Hold on, hold on, hold on. This is like Halloween or this is what No, this is just what pimps and hoes party, dog. This is the best dress ever. Hold on, hold on, hold on. Hold on, hold on, hold on. This is like Halloween or this is what you're doing? No, this is just what- Pimps and hoes party, dog. You don't know. This is just what Asians and Uyghurs do in Orlando. You don't know? Pimps and hoes party.

This is what people do in cul-de-sacs. In Orlando. What is Orlando like? I'm sorry. What was the purpose of the Reynolds wrap? To be sexy? Yes. That was her hoe outfit.

Wow. Well, that works. I mean, that's obvious. You're not classy. You know, you're wrapping yourself up with a Reynolds wrap. You definitely want to take some chances. It was as her underwear

or that was her dress? No, that was her dress and there was no underwear. No, there was no underwear. So she went up there for the keg stand and it looked like she was selling turkey burgers.

I thought you said she was going up for a keg stand like wearing a dress. The dress fell down and all she was wearing as underwear was Reynolds wrap. I thought you said she was going up for a keg stand, like wearing a dress. The dress fell down, and all she was wearing as underwear was Reynolds wrap. I was like, oh, she's a freak. No, she's a freak. She was just wearing Reynolds wrap with no underwear.

I don't think your turkey burger line got enough respect. I know. Give it a little bit of a pause. No worries. I mean, again, it's a round wrap on both sides. You're looking and you're seeing the meat. I like it. Yeah, you see a turkey.

I like where you went with that. It's a turkey burger. Pimps and Hoes Party, man. Those fucking movies. Pimps Up, Hoes Down. Oh, the best. Oh, my God. Those are real documentaries.

Are they the one about the ball? Yeah, yeah. Mr. White Folks. Mr. White Folks, yes. Oh, my God. Mr. White Folks. The white pimp In this old

Fucking redone Like 1930s car This dude used to drive around In his white suits And they would get together And Mr. White They would all like Rap pimp style

They would all like Rap at each other Yo I'm telling you Mount Rushmore of white people Kenny Powers Al Bundy Mr. White folks That is the white person

Mount Rushmore You know Mr. There's Mr. White folks Yes Mr. White folks Mr. White folks man People have slept, Mr. White Folks. That is the white person, Mount Rushmore. You know, there's Mr. White Folks. Yes, Mr. White Folks! Mr. White Folks, man. People have slept on Mr. White Folks. You gotta listen to him talk. Before I really got my feet wet in the game, right?

I was Eddie Moretti. Before I got my feet wet. My brother just started calling me White Folks and ever since then, it just stuck. Look, he's at a pimp and, I guess, date function. These are classy people. Shane, isn't that actually the global creative director of Mashed?

Eddie Moretti? I love his voice. Oh, yeah, he's got an African-American southern slang thing. You know, how to dress. Look at this, money, dollar bills. How to finesse. But you know, I got educated in the hood. I feel like that was a blessing for me, being Caucasian,

you know, to be able to come to the other side of the fence, you know, and be able to come to the other side of the fence, you know, and be accepted. Accepted. And also be able to do some of the things that some of the great men of the past that have done. Sort of like a ball cap and khakis and, like, you know, a football shirt and then just talk like that all the time. Or, like, you know, in a suit Like an IBM sales dude or whatever You just talk like this This is my favorite

They get less problems with the police You know They don't get that much static You know black bitch be wanting to Get in the street and act stupid You know be wanting to fight with the tricks And fight with the police And talk crazy

She can't take care of no business like that like yo people love coffee and cigarettes that shot of like bill murray with risa and all them but the best shot in a coffee shop ever is those toothless hookers drinking soup at the end of this white girl for something i forgot about that that's the illest shot i think that the females respect the game like they once did because there are hundreds and hundreds of thousands of renegades and outlaws. That's a female that's working and doesn't have a man. Renegades and outlaws.

He's got the best voice I've ever seen. Hilarious. choose first of all hilarious a bitch is not supposed to be looking at a pimp when a pimp ride by that's supposed to be looking at the motherfucking curb and when she look up at a pimp she can't be broke for reckless eyeballing look at this guy chasing him around she can't be broke for reckless eyeballing reckless eyeballing that means that she's making eye contact with the pimping. And she may not even be with that man. You know, that's the reason why I say the game has changed. In the old days, she'd be under pimp arrest. Ugh.

What a weird thing to be proud of, too. Yeah. You know, what a weird thing to be proud of, to be a guy who makes women sell their bodies. But, you know, talk about the things that the great pimps

of the past, I've been blessed to be able to do some of the shit the great pimps of the past, what have done. What was the doc

on the pimps, the famous one? Pimps Up, Hoes Down, and Hookers at the Point. No, that was your other one, the one that was

in the movie theater. The big one. Yeah, what was the one in the movie theater? Was it John Singleton did it? It was like Fillmore Slim.

Yeah. What the fuck was that one? I don't remember, but it was... God damn it. The big one. What was that movie? I don't know. It was a famous pimp movie.

Shit. Yeah. That was a good one, too. That might have been even better than Pimp's Up and Down. I think it was just called Pimp. American Pimp. American Pimp. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

American Pimp. Yeah. Yeah. They were both really good, man. It's yeah, yeah, yeah. American Pimp. Yeah, they're both really good, man. It's a weird world, man. And they have those pimp conventions. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, remember in Pimp's Up, Hoes Down?

Ice-T went to the pimp convention and started telling everybody that he was a pimp. And he was, like, rapping and talking about how he's not really a rapper. He's just a pimp. Yes. Okay. I thought you were on that Special Victims Unit show. No, no, no, no, no, no. I've never seen it.

Pimp. Never seen it. Just pimping. You got confused, dog. Ice tea, straight pimping. Yeah, he's getting his hair done in the show, talking about the pimp game, what the pimp game taught him about rap.

Okay. That's something a white guy can't pull off. CB4. Imagine if a white guy did that and then got on one of those special victims unit shows. The special victim unit shows, too, they're all about rape. So if he's on that and he says he used to sell pussy. He used to sell pussy and he's on a rape show? Yeah, that's kind of a conflict of interest.

That's just like the bankers working for the financial institutions. Yeah, the SEC. Hiring. Yeah, exactly. Hiring those professors. It's basically the same thing. That doesn't make sense at all. Ice-T, you silly man.

Ice-T ain't hurting nobody on Special Investigations Unit though. SVU, is that what it's called? SVU, is that what it is? I don't know. He's not hurting anybody? No, he's not. In fact, keep him off the streets, right? A lot of girls, there he is. Look at this. He's not talking? This is just a montage.

Oh, there's got to be one that has him talking. Find the one because he's got his hairs in curlers. It's pretty funny. It's weird, though. But that's a weird aspect of the black community that doesn't exist in the white community. There wouldn't be a bunch of white dudes sitting around talking about the pimp game. There's not enough of them.

You got Mr. White folks, dude. There's one. One guy. I think you probably have two things running. Yeah, I don't know. It's weird. That was not that long ago. But I think you'd feel a lot more criticism if you're going to put a movie out sort of glorifying the life of essentially a criminal who enslaves women.

Sure. That wouldn't fly today I don't think I think people would really complain because all the pimps opposed down came out a long ass time ago actually doing this you know my idols iceberg slam I'm named myself and have her doing anything I could sit in front of this white man and break him down exact same way it ain't no difference you know I'm saying cuz i don't want no pussy i never want a pussy from a bitch you know i'm saying so i'm like okay i'm gonna play this motherfucker i'm really finna see how

far i can take this shit and um i've been doing it ever since i can't act i really can't act i ain't no rapper i got it's all i'm it's all game ain't nobody i'm just i'm just working these niggas when that and then the funny thing is when I get out here and I deal with different individuals they were ice you know you ain't I'm like nigga I'm it's not a problem you know I'm saying that's not a problem that's not a problem if I could I I could still do it better now than ever I could knock 95% of any niggas bitches I know I can do this shit. It's not a problem, man. But it's like that was a new adventure for me to get over here. And real niggas can see it. They say, this nigga's got it.

Let's shut this off. I'm losing my mind. I'm not high enough to watch that. That's that real knowledge you're not ready for, Joe. I think so. I need more alpha brain. I'm not quite ready for that level. I had too much alpha brain. I'm into my ready for that level. I had too much alpha brain.

I'm into my cerebral cortex right about now. Yeah, I don't even know how we got on this whole pimps up, hoes down. We've gone into the vortex. Not as depressing as the hookers on the point series. That's the most depressing shit. Or kill a season I showed you last time. Yes. Yes.

There's a lot of those depressing prostitute videos. That's some depressing shit. Was Hooker's on the point That when all the cars Drive by And it just follows them Every night It's in the Bronx

Yeah Bronx Yeah there's apparently One area Hunts Point Yeah that's just got The worst case They have a great Farmer's market

Hunts Point Fantastic farmer's market The produce is amazing Out there And so Do the hookers just Come out at night and the farmer's market's done and then just the atmosphere changes radically? Yeah, they sell fish, then they sell fruit.

No, they sell fish, then they sell fish. Are they still doing that? It's a hunts point. Do they clean it up after that show? I'm not sure. I just go for the farmer's market. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I understand.

But, I mean, when you're at the farmer's market, do you see, like, yeah. I understand. But I mean, when you're at the farmer's market, do you see like daytime vampire scragglers? I've never seen them. Putting sunscreen on, venturing out of the cave? We've been here with one of the best chefs

in the world. We haven't talked about food once. Oh no, we talked about fake food. We did. That is true. You're such an all-around cool dude. Nobody would imagine that you're one of the best chefs in the world.

You think of a great chef, you think of someone that's impossible to reach. Some strange, very introspective artist, creative type. I consider myself just a very dope sandwich artist. The greatest Subway worker of all time. What is this driving you crazy? All this gluten-free shit? Are you getting angry at people? I'm allergic to a lot of stuff.

I actually did this test because I was having trouble on the road. I was having, like, stomach issues. I got food poisoning a few times, so I did these tests. I'm allergic to dairy, beef, lamb, all kinds of things. And you're a chef. Yeah. You're allergic to lamb? Yeah.

So what do you do? Well, I take supplements, and then I can have things. Like, it's going to affect me regardless. What do you mean, make you fart? I get diarrhea. I fart. I burp. And then, like, I kind of have other issues, right?

Like, man boobs, right? Damn, they come from, like, eating the wrong foods? The allergies can affect you in so many different ways. But I'm, like, highly sensitive to, like, beef, lamb, dairy, eggs, all all these weird foods so I've been seeing like this nutritionist I still eat it because I love to cook I love to eat it but it's just about managing it you know so what do they know what having it rarely I can only have it like like beef or lamb I'll eat once a month now do they know what the cause of all this stuff is is this something you you have? Did you eat, I'm imagining, beef and lamb?

Forever. Forever, right, right. Forever. And did you feel ill effects of it? And that's why you went and get it checked out? Did it progressively get worse? I've always had like intestinal issues and things like that. So it's not something that progressively got worse.

It was something that was always the case? Something that's always the case. And then they can't tell me because they didn't test me before for it. Like food allergies is kind of a new thing. Like not everybody's gotten tested for food allergies. But that's something people got to check out. But do you think it got worse after you became a chef? I mean, I definitely.

Because you were eating more weird shit. I definitely felt worse in my stomach. I mean, I was farting all over the place. Like my friends were like, you sound like a fucking machine gun. Just a walking fart. That's crazy that you're allergic to beef and lamb. Yeah, I get puffy and shit.

Those are such weird things. My eyes get irritated. It's kind of crazy. Those are such weird things to be... How is it to go around the world doing a cooking show if you can't eat the two most... Well, you still eat it.

Yeah, I just eat it. I eat it and I take those supplements and vitamins. What are the supplements that help you? Do you take digestive enzymes? I take those supplements and vitamins. What are the supplements that help you? Do you take digestive enzymes? I take oguwash root. There's something like oguwash root. There's grapeseed extract, methyl assist, probiotics.

And then the thing is when I'm not doing the shows and I'm not researching foods, I keep it really clean. Right. What does your diet consist of then when you're saying you keep it really clean? I eat greens. I eat seafood. I can eat pork and chicken. Pork, chicken, seafood. That's what I stick to.

That's fascinating. Lamb and beef. What about venison, elk, things along those lines? I'm not sure. They didn't test me for that. So I got to figure it out. But no, food allergies is real. How did you become a chef if every time you eat, you fucking-

Just farted up a storm. Yeah, I farted up a storm. I thought it was just how it was. Kids used to sign my yearbook. This one kid, because I had so much sinus issues, he was like, and I farted all the time, and I always needed to poop. He was like, life is a highway.

Bring tissues. He signed my yearbook that way in sixth grade. That's funny, man. What a weird circumstance to be found in. Did they have any reason why they believe that you got allergic to all these things? When they find out food allergies, do they have a source for these? Is it genetic? Is it environmental?

I think it's genetic. I think for me, it's genetic. Your family has the same issues? My mom has a lot of the same issues. Now, I had also the weirdest thing I developed in Mongolia. I got sick in Mongolia, and I had to take antibiotics to, like, flush my system out. I got back to America and went to see this doctor, and he's like, dude, you got a yeast infection.

I was like, I thought I needed a vagina to have a yeast infection. He's like, no, you have a yeast infection in your stomach because you cleaned it out with antibiotics, and the bad bacteria got in before the good bacteria. Was that candida? Yes. Yeah, you had it too. No.

Yeah. I heard you fart, Shane. You just read things, man. You read things. No, no, but. No, I didn't have the yeast infection. But I think the deal is, is like everyone has candida. I have every symptom of it, but it's like, oh, if you spit white and you fucking whatever.

Well, how about that fucking thing that you were telling me about the last time we talked? That crazy bug that you had pulled out of your stomach. I was just going to say, I've had all this crazy shit. Because you go, basically, if you go like sub-Saharan Africa, you know, Afghanistan, a lot of rural parts of India, you're going to get some shit. And so, by the way, I promised my wife I wouldn't talk about my bowel movements again on your show. She has a problem with that? But, yeah, I had this helmet-headed, flesh-eating parasite in my bowels.

And I had to get it out and all this shit. Anyway, if you ever go, you go then afterwards after you not, you know, you, you go then afterwards, after you get this shit done, you're like, okay, I'll have a, I'll bring cereal bars and drink, bring my home water and like, but eventually like, you know, you're going to eat some, you're going to drink some, you're going to get some. But what I just find amazing, cause I, I'm kind of a regular guy, whenever you go to these places, you just, you're going to pick up amoebas. It just happens.

these places you're just you're gonna pick up amoebas it just happens but you know for a guy who has stomach problems to become a traveling the world chef that makes anthony bourdain look like a fucking you know he's in short pants is a very is even a more of a courageous choice because you're going to the weirdest countries in the world eating the weirdest food in the world when a cheeseburger will make you shit your brains out. Yeah, no. I go crazy out there. I bring a lot of... I eat a lot of Barocca and I eat a lot of probiotics and I just have to keep it really clean.

Barocca, the British multivitamin? Yeah, it's the best. That's a hangover cure. Yeah, I take it just on the regular from eating food. What is it? Barocca, I call it. What is it? Yeah, it's like... It's better than emergency, all that. It's just B12 vitamins. It's like a rush of it.

But it really gets you. It's an effervescent tablet that's like a super hangover cure in England. Oh, I see. So you drop this in water. Yeah. It's like a lot of B12 and some other things. It's really good. Yeah.

Yep. I use that a lot. But no, man, it's tough to do the show on the road. But I love it because I didn't know I was allergic. I thought that that's just how you feel after eating. So 31 years, I don't have a problem doing it. But my doctor was like, look, if you want to live long, you don't want to wake up every day with diarrhea and like a kind of like nasal issue. Then you need to change the way you eat.

So now I just you'll see in season two, I'm sneezing all the time everywhere. How are your shits now? Solid. Solid. Solid. Strong. Like ox. Yeah.

Strong like ox. Yeah. In the Mongolia thing, there was that horse, did you eat horse? I drank fermented horse's milk, but the nastiest thing was,

That's the alcoholic beverage. Fermented mare's milk. Fermented mare's milk. Fermented horse's milk might be another thing. Yeah, that's cock. Fermented mare's milk. Fermented mare's milk. Fermented horse's milk might be another thing. Yeah, that's cock. Fermented mare's milk, yeah. That's what the Mongols, like, gang of the Mongols, the troops got drunk on. Famous.

And it clears your system out, too. It's like it detoxes you if it's your first time drinking it. Really? It'll clear you out. Oh, I want to do that. How does it detox you? Does it taste like shit? That's what they tell you.

It doesn't taste, all right, it sounds like it That's what they tell you. It doesn't taste... All right. It sounds like it's going to taste bad, but it doesn't taste bad. It does feel like you are... Like an unfermented shochu or unclarified shochu. It feels like you're inside a horse's ass, but in a sweet way. Because it's like... I can't picture that somehow.

It's the essence. You can't get around it that it's the fermented essence of this animal, and that bothers you at first, but then you're like, it's kind of sweet. It has a sweet and delicate flavor. But it tastes like a horse. It tastes like a fucking horse. It tastes like you're licking a horse.

It's something that would sell if you brought it back. It's like licking a horse that's wrapped in honey. That's what it looked like in that bottle? The white bottle that's up there? That's what it looked like In that bottle The white bottle That's up there That's what it looked like Oh no no no no no Like fermented mare's milk That's just mare's milk

Like they had it In a wooden bucket And they just ladled it Into bowls They just let it rot Yeah There was pieces of hay in it Alright

Because hay would just Fly into it And then I was eating With these people Amazing I want to drink that It was actually good And it cleaned me out. What do you mean it cleans you, makes you shit?

I just shit my pants. Listen. I don't know if that's good. But a lamb chop makes you shit your pants. Yeah. Yeah, it does. In a different way. Different kind of shit.

Different ferocity. This was explosive. This was like, this rocked me like a hurricane. From the mare's milk. Yeah, this shit just ran out of me like my ass was staying on South Park. Do you think that this could be something that could be successfully bottled and then sold to the mare? Don't have a colon. I'm sure people in Williamsburg and like Bushwick will buy fermented mare's milk.

Oh, fuck yeah. Williamsburg is the hip section of Brooklyn, right? Vice should start bottling the shit we find on the road. You know, somebody came to us and said we should make a vice moonshine like a vice whiskey, white whiskey. That's a good idea. We should do a vice.

Mayor's milk. We should do a vice fucking mayor's milk. Why don't you? What's holding you back? It's like, if you like kombucha. Laziness.

You guys got cash. Let's make it roll, son. Laziness. People love kombucha. They will be shitting their faces off. Eddie's fucking fermented mayor's milk.

Shane, let's make white Brooklyn shit their faces off. I'm a big fan of kombucha. Do you drink kombucha at all? Yeah, I like kombucha. Talking about probiotics? I like it. It's real good for you. It won't get you lit up like that mare's milk.

You guys are making me feel real bad. Why? I just drink fucking booze. Just drink booze. Terrible. I think you go to places that are so fucked up that you get back here, you're like, whatever. No, but can I tell you one thing thing there's four blue zones in the world

a blue zone is where people live well into their hundreds and a lot of them Costa Rica right where I have a house where they just drink a lot of booze and smoke a lot of dope in Crete and Sardinia

which is again just dudes they just drink and wine all day they don just dudes, they're just drinking wine all day. Like, they don't get wasted, but, you know, they're drinking wine all day, eating fish, doing whatever. Well, they eat everything. And one is in the Caucasus near Dagestan where they're walking up and down the mountains. And they eat the same thing every day, lamb and vegetables and shit. walking up and down the mountains. And they eat the same thing every day.

They eat lamb and vegetables and shit. And then the last one is this part of Japan, you know, where they eat like burdock root every day and stuff. But anyway, they all drink booze. And a lot of booze. And the one thing is consistency of diet. They eat basically the same thing every day. Well, you have a liver. I mean, the liver can process booze.

It's just a matter of how much booze you drink. That's what we're talking about. I've seen some of those studies. I figure it's the happiness factor and the low levels of stress as opposed to stress. I agree with you. Yeah, I think that stress is probably way worse

than almost anything else you do. Stress is the killer. Especially real stress. There's people that can't go to bed at night. They else you do. Stress is the killer. Especially like real stress. Like there's people that can't go to bed at night. They get home from work and they're fucking wired to the gills. Yeah. Thinking about the office and all the things they have to get done and all the competition and the social politics that are playing on.

And then they sleep for a couple hours and they get up and they're fucked up. So they take a pill and then they fucking keep going. Yeah. I had two grandmothers. One lived to 99, one lived to 101. And neither of them ever had a job. And at 2 o'clock in the afternoon, it was cocktail hour until it was 99 at 9. And that was it.

They just got lit up. They got lit up every, well, for four hours every day, which they all worked up to. That was it. Now we're going to have our cocktails, and then we're going to go to sleep, and that's it. That's beautiful. There's something beautiful in that when you really stop and look at the the actual end itself simplicity well what is the end what's the end game is the end i mean what do you really want to do you want to leave behind some structures what do you want to do you want to yes you want to have some things that are carved into stone with your name on it i'd like to

build a monolith something Something very 2001-esque. Something that looks like it was placed here by the aliens. Yeah, what do you want to do, man? What do you want to do? Who, me? No, anybody. Oh, in the world. You might as well go their way.

Their way seems great. They get together with their little fucking cunty friends at cocktail hour and start getting lit up and talking shit and talk about all the dicks they sucked back in the old days. I bet they do. That's my grandmother. Three or four drinks in, they start talking about sucking cock. They probably get crazy.

Maybe. Dude, I want to hang out with grandmas getting wasted talking about sucking dick. They're out there. That would be awesome. We say it would be awesome until they get all fucking salivating and start looking at your dick. That would be weird. That would be weird. It's weird, but it would be awesome until that point.

An old woman that used to be really hot. And then you see her now and you realize, whoa, this is strange. Her body's deteriorated. Now she's this little tiny thing that can barely get by. Her back's all hunched over. That used to be this soft, supple, juicy sex pot. That's a weird thing.

The recognition of mortality in that sense. Sad. Old grandmas are always young. She probably got the illest war stories. You talking about sucking dick? No.

Are you saying war stories? These old grandmas. When you say war stories, what do you illest war stories. You talking about sucking dick? No. Are you saying war stories? These old grandmas. When you say war stories, what do you mean by war stories? Yeah, I'm saying. Like dick sucking stories. I want to hear grandmas talk about that shit. Man, I hit all the dramatic angles. Dramatic angles.

Now I need to stop this podcast and get a fucking notepad. Dramatic angles. What? Exactly. Dramatic? Okay. Hmm. I'm trying to think in my head.

I guess it would be like the POV angle. There's the side angle. The taint angle. The taint angle. How do you suck dick when you're looking at someone's taint?

No, I'm saying they gotta get into the taint too. They gotta work the taint. The grandma, you know grandma got into the taint too. They grew up in the fucking, during the days

where soap was expensive. They probably didn't work that taint that much. I'm sure they got up in there too. Do you think so? Yeah. I think during the depression there wasn't a lot of taint, too. They grew up in the fucking, during the days where soap was expensive. They probably didn't work that taint that much. I'm sure they got up in there, too. Do you think so? Yeah. I think during the Depression, there wasn't a lot of taint licking. We need to get a round table with these grandmothers. And come to a consensus.

Yeah. Let's get on to Craigslist. Freaky grandmas. You fucks with the taint. Come on the Joe Rogan experience. Real grandmothers of Orlando. Yes. Yes.

Have all these grandmas of Orlando that were sucking dick back in the 50s. Tell us what was up. We need to hear from them. Tell us what was up, grandmas. Tell us. Just crack a beer.

Wow. Teach these young kids how to do it. Teach these young kids. What other disturbing shit did you go see that you can freak us out about? Greenland melting

and them training the Boston bombing suspects? I don't know if we talked about it before. It took us a while to shoot, but we just finished it, and it's fucked up. During the Cold War, right after the first bomb in 45, we started testing them and, you know, what does it do? And so during the Cold War, we had, you know, testing grounds in Nevada and all that shit. The Soviets were doing these air tests, you know, to test, you know, air bursts. And they did it in a place called the Semipitalinsk Testing Polygon,

otherwise known as the Polygon. And it was about an area that was inhabited by about 2 million people. And so what happened is the majority, we went there and we checked out the land and it was still irradiated like 40 years later. And I think the thing was like having five CAT scans an hour, 24 hours a day for the rest of your life. So all of these towns around the polygon have these mutants, right? And like crazy mutants. Like the scary thing about it actually is they had a whole orphanage of mutants that looked exactly like the mutants from Akira.

Like maybe that's why they drew Akira that way. But, like, it was literally like a classic comic book or textbook, like, mutant. And you're like, it was scary because of that. Like, it wasn't like, you know, there was a tumor here or whatever. It was like these babies with these huge heads with veins in them and shit. Oh, my God. And not just one. Like, you know, a whole orphanage full of them.

There was this one guy who had his whole sort of, you know, all of his skin was like sort of looked like it was melting off. It was all tumors. And, you know, they have so many, and this is three generations in, so they're like, okay. Is this guy? Is that the guy? That's one of the guys, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Oh, my God. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's sad, man. Yeah. But anyway, so what's happening now, it's quite interesting because it's the X-Men but in real life, is what's happening is the people from the Polygon have gone into like other cities and stuff. And their human genetics, like their genome has been reconfigured by the radiation poisoning. But they're passing it on sort

of generation to generation. So their kids and their kids' kids have these same sort of genetic disorders, rare birth defects, cancers, et cetera, et cetera. And so what they've started to argue for is that the issuance of a genetic passport, which registers your mutations and your human genes and your genome and the well the obvious sort of extension of that is why are you fucking giving them a genetic passport if you don't want them to procreate because you don't want them to procreate to then pass on the mutated genome so it's this whole mutant versus norm kind of x-men but in real life and you go wow that's nazism that's fucking

eugenics that's fuck you that can't be And then you go and see the genetics that are been passed along. And you're like, oh, this is some serious fucking shit. We, we did some. And when I said, we don't understand the technology, obviously we don't understand the power of it. We don't understand how to store it. We don't understand how to make it without fucking melting down. Fukushima's fucking irradiating fish in LA. Like it's crazy. But when you talk about genetics and how genetics get affected, you just get to the fucking tip of the iceberg.

I want shit we're fucking up. And so when you see these people who are being issued by, with genetic passports to like you, you know, for procreation, for all these things, because their genome is fucked up, you're like, what the fuck? We made that. We did that. We did that.

We created this shit that fucks up our genetics. How bad is Fukushima? Bad. Very bad. Like, what it shows, what's interesting about it is when Sandy hit New York, you know, there's the 14th Street power plant that got knocked out. And it was like, we have an 18-foot flood wall.

Like, 18 feet, man. But what if the water comes over? But it can't. It's 18 feet. What if it comes over? Well, it'll short out and we'll be fucked and there'll be no energy in fucking New York for that. Dude, I live on 14th Street when it happened.

We saw it explode from my window and we were like, what the fuck? Yeah, yeah, I saw it. And the thing is, and you sit there and you say, okay, but they're just incredulous because it can never go over the flood wall. And then of course it did go over the flood wall. It blew up and then you fucking, there's no power. If you look at Fukushima, it's a perfect example of

the problem with nuclear power is that, okay, it's no way the fucking sea can come up here. The sea cannot come up here. It just can't get here. Boom. There's a fucking tsunami. It comes up and it's sea can come up here. The sea cannot come up here. It just can't get here. Boom. There's a fucking tsunami. It comes up and it's fucking, that's it.

Now, the levels of radiation have not fucking gone down. We have a crew there shooting right now. The levels of radiation in the area are through the fucking roof. The levels of radiation now that go out in sort of concentric circles, and I think there's been some reports now, again, I've verified these reports and I'm going on the record of, you know, fish, you know, here that are fully irradiated from Fukushima. And you're like, okay, how much worse do we need it to be? That's why taking these spent fuel rods and things becomes an issue because we can't go forward with the current

technology as it is. And so that's why if you take this spent fuel and at least can do something with it rather than just, you know, let it fucking irradiate for the next 10,000. And this has all been proven, this kid's theories of you reusing spent fuel? No.

No. Not that I know of. Maybe they have. I don't know. I just saw a speech and I was, you know, I had a few drinks and I'm like, I'm crying. This guy is going to save my life. I love you, 17-year-old boy with a bowl cut.

I did see a piece on the fish, on tunas being 3% more irradiated than ever before. Oh, yeah. That's a big number. Yeah. 3% after a couple of years when you're doing something that's going to be irradiated in the ocean for hundreds of thousands of years if it keeps leaking. Yeah. Is it, you know, that thing that they're doing too where they're trying to make the structure to keep all the water in, all the radiated water. Yeah.

And they're going to keep it in with ice walls. So they're going to have to keep it frozen. Well, there's a lot of stories now coming out that the Japanese government, you know, kept it under wraps and didn't want to tell anybody. And the food, you know, around in the whole region was irradiated, and people in Tokyo were showing increased signs, etc., etc. And you're like, well, you know, okay, it's going to be bad for quite some time. What do you expect?

God damn. And how the fuck are they ever going to stop it? I mean, is the rest of the world going to join in and help Japan? Are they still leaving it up to Japan? Like, what's being done from our side? Well, I think if you look at environmental things, I mean, now it's become such a... Oh, what's this? Yeah, that's not real, though, Jamie.

That's not what that represents. It doesn't represent radiation. A lot of people have mistakenly posted that. That's just heat things. I don't know what it is, but it's not radiation. I remember reading it. They really haven't mapped how much radiation is in there and where it's going.

But one of the theories that I was listening to this professor talk about the currents and the tides and where it's all going, that somehow or another it's going to wind up around Baja, California in Mexico. Yes, it's being pushed out there. Yeah, and that it's going to pool up around Baja, California in Mexico. Yes, it's being pushed out there. Yeah.

And then it's going to pool up there because that's where everything from Japan eventually goes. It goes to this one area and pools up. And you're like, that spot's going to be dead. Really? Yeah, that spot's going to kill everything. And that's, of course, a spot that a lot of people fish and a lot of people surf. And it's a very popular spot. And it's just going to be radioactive as fuck.

And it's going to go through the Polynesian Islands before it gets there. So pretty much everything is going to get raped. It's just unbelievably incredible that they never thought that it would be able to get shut off, that they just built this crazy power plant with no ability to cool it down.

But that's what I'm saying is, like, we have these fail-safe methods because you're like, well, it can't go above this. And then it does because now weather has become fucking crazy. Well, it's also we, first of all, even if weather wasn't becoming crazy, those kind of storms have existed throughout history. It's incredibly arrogant and silly to assume that those storms won't exist during the brief window of time that you haven't figured out how to shut these plants down without it. And you prepare for it because the one time it happens, it's worth it. And also, we've had earthquakes forever, too.

Like, oh, well, here's a plant. But if we have an earthquake, well, you're going to have an earthquake. Well, they were good up until like a 7 or something crazy like that. They couldn't handle that 8.9 that rocked them. Did you see that recent video that was released of this closed circuit camera? The tsunami coming. There's a car coming.

And the car sees the tsunami and turns around and leaves. And you see the tsunami literally chasing the car down the street. It's so fucked. Because when you talk about the water got to this guy's wheels before he peeled out of there. And then you see the waves carrying houses behind him. Carrying houses. And this guy's wheels before he peeled out of there. And then you see the waves carrying houses behind him. Carrying houses. And this guy's peeling.

Who knows if he made it? I mean, it would have been a cruel trick if we're all applauding his escape. And then he runs into a fucking traffic jam a block away and gets run over with a house. But when you watch it, it's pretty dark. It's like, whoa, that shit came in quick. Carrying houses. I wouldn't. Damn. Yeah. And that could happen here. It's like whoa That shit came in quick Carrying houses Damn And that could happen here

Easy Well it's not just a fault There's assholes This isn't the video But this is one video Of how quick it overcomes everything Look at that A dry city and then all of a sudden

Out of nowhere Here it comes oh shit you better turn around bitches look at this look at this guy look at this guy oh my god oh my god look at but it's coming in with houses. Not one house. Houses. Like hundreds of houses in wood. It's just fucking insane. And it's happened here. It's happened here throughout history. There was a big one apparently somewhere.

I think they said it was the 1700s in Portland. Somewhere around Portland. They just wiped out most of the Pacific Northwest. Just came in a couple hundred miles in, fucking killed everything and pulled out. A couple hundred years later, trees grow back and everything looks nice. It's fine if that happens if there's not a reactor there.

If there's a reactor there, it's pulling out all that radioactive material forever. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, I mean, yeah, you're right. I mean, that's the scariest thing is when it's happening somewhere near a reactor. What's really scared me is that I don't think I've heard one person come up with any way that makes sense as to how to contain it. Not just how to contain it, but how to stop stop it how to clean the area up is almost just not even discussed right i mean how the fuck do they clean that how do you put you're gonna put

a giant filter on the ocean i'm guessing they can't and that's why they don't talk about it but that's no reason either is that gonna fuck up the entire west coast because that's like the worst case doomsday scenarios that i've read online that entire west coast sure out there with the radiation moving to California. That map is scary. Yeah, that's what I said. That map doesn't necessarily represent radiation. Let me say radiation map

Japan debunked. I'll pull it up because You kind of are good at sort of putting something up and then debunking it. That's what I do. I'm mysterious, bro. I move around. Yeah, debunking the NCAA radiation map. Yeah, more Fukushima scaremongering debunked. Yes, apparently that's not what it is. But how do you know that the debunking isn't debunked?

Dude, you're scaring the fuck out of me now. I don't even know. Mm-hmm. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Yeah. Apparently it's being debunked on a couple different websites. That seems to make sense.

Snopes. Snopes debunked it. Image purportedly shows radioactive sewage spreading across the Pacific Ocean and is false. That's not what it is. But how do you know that the person saying that isn't? It's true.

It's true if you want to be all crazy, doom and gloom. But me, I want to live my life. We've really vacillated tonight between doom and gloom and fuck it. It's all right. It's going to be okay. Shitting our car hoods. And then I'm like, you know right. It's going to be okay. Shitting on car hoods. And then I'm like, you know what? It is going to be okay in here.

No, it's a meth head guy with radioactive isotopes. Well, as someone who is an immigrant in America, I would think you would respect our fine country enough so that you would look on the bright side of things. The glass is half full, Shane Smith of vice.com, Captain Doom and Gloom. That's it. Sir, you pay your mortgage on Doom and Gloom.

How dare you? In my fine country. I smile in my show. If the shit hits the fan, are you going to move to Montreal? No. It gets warmer. It'd be nice up there. It'd be a nice spot.

Canadian Shield, you know. Get up there in the lakes. Millions of lakes. Can't get to me. Can't get to me. Moving fast. Moving fast. Well, you don't have to worry about people. When I there in the lakes. Millions of lakes. Can't get to me. Can't get to me. Moving fast. Moving fast. Well, you don't have to worry about people.

What I'm saying, the shit hits the fan. I'm saying when you have to build a house out of logs and go trapping for beavers for dinner. Yeah. There's a Canadian shield, man. It's a good spot. Up there. Plus, if Global One really kicks in. How the fuck are you going to get there, though? It's going to be like the road for like a thousand miles just with your shopping cart and the ashes and shit. Dog sled. Dog sled, yeah.

Yeah, you need a dog sled. You need dogs. No, that's why I'm enjoying the shit out of my shit because God knows how much longer we got, so enjoy it. Do you think you have an extra potent doom and gloom ideology in your head or vision in your head rather because you're doing so much traveling to so many fucked up spots? Like if you were just traveling between the United States and Canada, you might be like a

lot of folks that are out there that are just like, yeah, everything's going to be fine. Yeah. We were talking earlier about the 34,000 foot sort of how it changes your shit. Like you can become more emotional or whatever. It was interesting. We'll explain that for the people that weren't

listening to it at all. At like high altitude, long haul, you get this. F or whatever. It was interesting. We'll explain that for the people who weren't listening to it at all. At high altitude, long haul, you get this. Flights. Flights, yeah. Like 34,000 views of cruising flight of general commercial aviation. And so there's a syndrome where you feel emotions much stronger. So if you're watching a movie, for example, and I was joking on the movie Armageddon, I was bawling my eyes out. You have this uncontrollable, like, oh my God, he's going to marry Liv Tyler

or whatever. And, uh, and, but you know, normally it wouldn't be like, but you can also feel, uh, uh, you know, euphoric, you can feel sad. You can like, it's just a sort of emotion crank, you know, at, at, at high altitudes. What were we talking about? Well, you were talking about emotions. About emotions firing. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, right. So when I come back on planes sometimes, I have these emotional things, and I'm like, you know what?

Fuck it. I'm going to get a place in the Canadian show. I'm going to get a place. Just hedge my bets. Just maybe shit doesn't go wrong, but I always say this. If you know there's a 1% chance or a 5% chance, you didn't hedge your bets, you're a fucking idiot. So I'm like, okay, I'm going to hedge my bet.

I'm going to get a place up in the Canadian Shield with a freshwater lake, and no one can get to. It's hard to get to all this shit. Now you're going to build a fucking cottage on there. You can have a cottage during the summers, and by the way, if a shit goes bad, you're up there. You got water, you got all this shit. Okay, fine. was bad you're up there you got water you got all the shit okay fine now i thought this was a particular sort of lunacy of my 34 000 foot fly back from kabul to fucking cheeseburger land and then i started talking to people right who are like running media companies or journalists or

run the bureau out of uh you know uh kabul or you know just you know people have been sort of around the world or doing every single fucking one of them is like i'm getting a bolt hole yeah i got a place in the mountains here i got a place over here i got a place over there and i think it's because you realize it probably won't happen but and it shouldn't happen but and people thought that the end of the world was coming for a long time and and I'm the least sort of, you know, conspiracy theory, oh, we're all going to die kind of guy and all this shit. And I'm like, if it hasn't happened before now.

However, you go to enough things like Fukushima or like Greenland or like Dagestan or Pakistan or all these. Pakistan, by the way, is becoming a failed state. It has fucking over hundred warheads on missiles ready to fucking go so at a certain point you're just like i'm a gambling man i'm gonna hedge my bets i'm gonna fucking just have a bolt hole because if shit goes down why the fuck wouldn't you yeah and and i didn't think it affected me until I had that discussion. It was one of those things where it's like, I masturbate. Yeah, so do I.

So do I. It's like everybody admitted to we have this sort of paranoia. And they were all, it was kind of like-minded. And I was like, oh, fuck, it's fucked me up now. And then I felt like I have a fucked up head. Yeah, when you travel, it's hard to deny or turn an eye to the things that you see going on and the conditions that are in other places and like we are fed the illest soma here in america we get the best soma and i think it really really blinds us to what's going on and what could happen to us

like look at when you say soma you don't mean the sleeping pills no i mean like the brave new world out as huxley like right know, the wool over our eyes. Like we have television. We have memes. We have, you know, all these things that distract us. We have cheap food. We have cheap real estate. We have cheap loans, you know.

And so I think it distracts us from the fact that, like, these problems that are at the water's edge could be at your door very quickly. And you see it. Like Detroit, I think, is the latest example. could be at your door very quickly. And you see it, like Detroit, I think is the latest example. Yeah, Detroit is a scary example. We were there filming and there were houses for sale for $500.

Yeah. You could buy a house for 500 bucks. We did a story there that I fucking, sorry to interrupt. No, I was going to say the smell in the air

is insane. The pollution is so tangible. You feel. We have this great story of these kids, you know, and they're scrappers. And they go into these houses that are abandoned houses. And they rip every piece of metal out of it, right? And then they sell it to these barges.

And the barges come in. And they fill them with all this scrap metal, all the schools, all the old hospitals. They're just ripping all the metal out, all the girders, everything. And they ship it to China because the quest for steel is insatiable. And we found it in Baltimore. We did it in Cleveland. We did it in Detroit where we're ripping the shit out of our old industrial cities and literally melting it down to do the new industrial cities in China.

That's so organic. It is, right? It is. I was like, that's kind of a poetic story, actually. It is. We're pulling down our shit, melting it, and then building it for the- Well, isn't that what they did with all the wreckage from 9-11? You know who shot?

David Cho shot that for it. Really? David Cho is the host of that, and he goes out with the kids as they rip every fucking, like, big industrial schools and factories, and they just take all the fucking. That's so crazy. Isn't that what they did with the Twin Towers when they fell as well? Didn't they sell the scrap to China? Oh, I don't know. That's interesting.

I'm pretty sure they did. I'm pretty sure they boxed it all up and shipped it. Well, North Korea, when you go around North Korea, all the buildings have all these big, they look like a concrete woodpecker has pecked away at them because they pull out the rebar. And then they sell the rebar to China as scrap. And you're like, hold on, you're going to make your whole fucking, how much money can you get for that much rebar? Oh my God. Like 500 bucks.

Also, how did they get the contact? Do you know what I mean? Like if you're stealing, if you're a scrapper in Detroit, how did you get in touch with people to melt this down and then sell it to China? That's kind of... No, no, because China's buying

essentially all the scrap. They have such a desire for steel and steel is expensive and hard to make. So to get scrap and then melt it down is actually more cost efficient, even shipping it across the world. So what they're doing is not just in America. They're anywhere where they can send scrap.

The open order is send it here. It's not just get Detroit's schools and give them to me. They're just taking all the scrap from everywhere. Yeah. There's a demand and then it filters down into the neighborhood. Wow. What's that so, it's such a weird and ironic twist to our story. Isn't it?

What a poetic fucking. We sold off our manufacturing overseas to the WTO and all the different bills that have been passed that have cut out the manufacturing base in this country. And then they slowly extract the metal and ship it in boats over to China. Well, we're living off the sort of remnants of that society, and we're like taking everything and going, sell it, sell it, sell it. It's so weird. You know, Detroit has started to make a comeback as far as cars, at least. At least American cars, they're starting to produce real cars again.

Cadillac won the car of the year. Yeah, the CTS-V. It's a fucking badass car. It's a technological marvel. It handles as good as any German car that's ever been made. The build quality is spectacular. They're actually making real cars now. The new Corvette's amazing. It's an amazing car. They're making

cars that people want to buy. Like, finally. But goddamn, they fucked it up for a long time. Remember from the 70s until today, American cars were a joke. If you weren't buying a Ford pickup truck, those were always solid as a rock. Chevy pickup trucks, things along those lines. Most of American cars were dog shit. Yeah, it was quality control.

It was just dog shit. You have to give a shit. yeah and the thing is is japanese people who handed us our lunch really were like give a shit yeah their culture they're they're missing all the fucking crucial elements that make every american think that he's awesome individually and that's so much so that they're not willing to secede to the group you know in japan like it's a big part of working in a factory is that everything is for the company. Everything for company. They take pride in the fact that the company does well. Also, if you go to any

shitty 5 o'clock fucking drunk ramen place, they've been boiling that stock for two days and everything's perfect. You go to a shitty yakitori place, it's like they make it the best they possibly fucking can. It's like they give a shit. If I'm going to make shitty yakitori place, it's like they make it the best they possibly fucking can. And it's like they give a shit. If I'm going to make fucking yakitori, it's going to be the best goddamn yakitori I can possibly fucking make.

Yeah, we've got this entitled attitude in this country, or I shouldn't say we. Some people have this. It's a poison of character. Sure. And it's degrading the very foundation. I'm not making money making this fucking yakitori. Fuck it. I'm going to make it shit.

And you're like, well, hold on. If you're going to fucking do it. Yeah, but he has dreams. Anything. If you're going to do anything. Yeah, Shane pointing out the ramen and yakitori, it makes sense because

there's a lot of chefs that get a lot of acclaim in this country simply for the fact that they speak English because they can communicate it better. They have the money

to open a yakitori place in the right neighborhood where writers live or it's accessible. But they usually, it's not about authentic or whatever. It's exactly what you talked about is the person from that culture probably gives a shit more because it represents them. And a lot of people like young chefs and things like that, they think that they can go over to some place for a couple weeks and be like, oh, I can make yakitori. I can make ramen.

This is easy stuff. You know, like that guy Ivan Ramen, he's very, very famous. He did ramen in Japan, but he lived that shit. Right. You know, you really have to live that shit. Ivan Ramen, he named himself after the soup? Yeah. Or he was named that anyway, and he became because he was named that.

I'm not sure. He opened a place in New York. It's like all the buzz I haven't been yet nice guy if his name was Ivan Ramen then it would be

interesting to find out if because of his name he became Mr. Ramen or if because just because I just think his restaurant was named Ivan

I'm not sure did you ever see that one Tony Robbins special where he went to not Tony Robbins Tony Bourdain special Jesus Christ I have seen the Tony Robbins special where he went to not Tony Robbins Tony Bourdain special Jesus Christ

I have seen the Tony Robbins one I feel fucking good Tony Robbins noodle special he went and there was this one dude who had been making noodles

the same way his family had been making noodles for fucking oh in China sitting on the stick yeah yeah yeah hopping up and down

wasn't that amazing yeah I mean watch this guy make noodles all fucking day. Press it and make it. And you see what physical labor it is. And this guy is just a master at making noodles. And I never considered that there was an art to making noodles. But see, if a kid did that here, like if some kid from Culinary Institute of America,

I hang out with these other chefs. If somebody was doing that here, he'd put that guy in a glass case in the front of his restaurant, wear a chef coat, and be like, give me awards. I deserve it. Do you see what I'm doing?

It's like, dude, chill. You should do it because that's a good way to do it. Inside chef talk. A lot of people mad about people wanting awards. I'm the Kanye West of chefs. No, I don't even submit to those things.

Motherfucker, I am Wolfgang Puck. In the flesh. I invent these types of even submit to those things. Motherfuck, I am Wolfgang Puck in the flesh. I invent these types of stuff. I'm Julia Child, bitch. That shit is funny. Who's gonna step up and give me the Medici money to run my new fast food joint? Who's the best chef in the world? Go.

I don't think that's possible to say. How dare you? You know what question I could answer? I can't answer who's the best chef in the world. I think there's no answer to that. I will say that there's one chef I met that I do bow to, and that I am, like, his fucking grasshopper. And when I see him, he inspires me.

And I just want to be a fly on the wall in his kitchen and hang out with him. He's the best. Master Yu in Szechuan, and he's been featured in like Fuchsia Dunlop. I thought you were going to say Emeril. Bam! Yo, Emeril's also the man. Bam! I met Emeril.

Emeril is a stand-up dude, really cool, really cool down-to-earth dude who really knows his food. But Master Yu in Chengdu I met, cooked me some of the best meals I've ever seen, and then he also kind of showed me new techniques on dishes that I've been cooking for years and that's dope

when somebody can take something you've been doing for so long and be like check it out this way what was the difference in the variations

what were the dishes that he cooked for you alright so the simplest thing was the most impressive thing that he taught me was chili oil right people always have

an issue with temperature and making chili oil to get it at the right temperature and use a thermometer and things like that. Chili oil, what he does is he heats up his oil to a certain point where canola oil will be a little yellow at first. He'll heat it up so hot that it becomes white.

Let the temperature drop. Then he'll heat it up till it's hot to the touch and put it over the chili grounds. and that'll be like an encasing so that when he puts hotter oil on top it won't burn the chili oil so he'll cook it in a in an oil that's just slightly hot to touch then he'll heat it up another 60 degrees or something put more of that oil in then he'll get it ripping hot and put that oil in but the chili never burns and then you can also see how the flavor of the chilies and the smell of the chilies changes at every temperature and that is the hallmark of szechuan cooking that is the

thing that's most amazing they took a couple ingredients but one especially is the red dried chili pepper and just because of temperature. I got a question. Yes. Hold on, but I need to hear the answer. Sorry, sorry. Just because of temperature? Just because of temperature, that one ingredient can become so many different things.

And it's like that culture of cooking, Szechuan cooking in China, pays that much attention to almost every ingredient available to them. pays that much attention to almost every ingredient available to them but us now like our culinary revolution so to speak in america is such a like faux revolution to me like in other countries like france you go to france you go to china there's people been cooking and doing these things for 5 000 years and this is what their parents teach them in their homes it's it's really cool sorry wow that's fascinating shit, man. Yeah. The idea that they figured out how to not overheat it. Yeah.

And that's why I don't, like, read the food blogs here. But I will travel and I'll go into any place and I want to see, like, your technique. Like, that's what I'm looking for. I don't care about, like, fancy restaurants or ambiance. I want to see technique. It's really fun to see someone take something so simple that's available to you every day. It's a wok, it's oil, and it's a dried chili pepper. You can fuck with it all day.

Sorry, I just wanted to ask him a question because I love Szechuan and I love chili. I'm a chili fanatic. I'm Irish, so what chili does to me, what beef does to you. But I'm addicted to it. I love chili, all different kinds of chili. But I love Szechuan food. But it was only when I went there that I realized they have two spices. They have chili and mung.

And I never had it before going to China i think it's illegal actually to do here maybe but you know in china in szechuan dishes there's tons and tons of mung do you know what mung is no it's a spice that they put in that dulls numbs your mouth it numbs your tongue you mean like peppercorn yeah well yeah well they isn't sexual and what they have is here we just have dried szechuan peppercorn mostly available some restaurants can get green peppercorn but the green peppercorn is like eating a newport cigarette yeah it's kind of amazing i love it eating a newport cigarette that's a great way it numbs your mouth yeah it numbs your tongue it numbs your whole fucking shit it's amazingbs your tongue. It numbs your whole fucking shit. It's amazing.

Now, let me ask you this, because I don't understand chilies or peppers. Why New Mexico? Why is New Mexico famous for chilies? Hatch green chilies. What's the deal? It's native to them. And chihuahua. Yeah.

Best green salt chihuahua. I heard they'll cook them for you, and they'll freeze them and ship them to you. And they're worth getting from New Mexico. Oh, yes. Really? Yeah. It's really cool those regions. Like New Orleans has the Creole tomato that's only available for about like six weeks out of the year.

And it's almost like a fruit tomato. And then you have like the hatch green chilies in New Mexico. So like America has this amazing produce that's native to the country. And it's cool to go on the ground to these regions where they've played with it for hundreds of years. The hatch green chilies what they were saying was that it was just it's not a super spicy chili it's a delicious taste. Delicious. We were shooting that Mitt Romney or not Mitt Romney but Romney the Mormon colonies in Chihuahua and we were there like a couple weeks.

And I was just going, what the fuck is this? This shit is awesome. And it's the hash green chili or hatch green chili salsa, which is the best shit I've ever had in my life. Really? And it's in a meat, Chihuahua is like the meat, you know. And so they have steaks and they have a lot of shit. And you have a barbecue steak and they just pour this chili on top. It's the best fucking thing I've ever had. In New Mexico, they use it with antelope. they have a lot of shit. And you have a barbecue steak, and they just pour this chili on top.

It's the best fucking thing I've ever seen. In New Mexico, they use it with antelope. They have a lot of antelopes, pronghorn antelopes in New Mexico, and they cook it. That's where I saw these chilies. It was on the show Meat Eater. They shot an antelope, and then they cooked it with these chilies, New Mexico style. And they were just raving about how good these chilies are. Chilies are fantastic.

I've got to get some of that shit. I'm going to get some. If you know the place, I've got to get some of that shit. I'm going to get some. If you know the place, I'm going to get some because I fucking love that shit. All right. Well, how long are you in town for? Ever. In L.A. for? I'm living with you now.

All right. Okay. We'll figure it out. That's the thing, man. I'm moving to the commune. Isn't that why you invited us here? Dude, we're here. We're queer.

Get used to it. I brought my Nikes and my tracksuit. We don't need Nikes, man. Nikes have a bad record. We're going to go with Converse All-Stars. The Salcany. Salcany because they're weird. That's good.

That's a weird one. Asics gives you like an athletic air. What am I, a wrestler? Salcany is just weird. I want to talk to you about that. I had a funny conversation with Jimmy Kimmel today about that drug that you guys covered on Vice that devils. Crocodile? No, scopolamine.

Scopolamine. Scopolamine is the same shit that they put in the patch that they give to people when they're seasick. My doctor told me that scopolamine is like regularly prescribed for people that have seasick when they have the patch. Yeah, I think it's in the different dosages. Like basically what the scopolamine that is the zombie drug is like the heroin level alkaloid. You know what I mean? And then the scopolamine in the patch is like the aspirin. Well, that's because the reason why I was bringing this up

is Jimmy Kimmel was telling me that him and Adam Carolla had the patches on and they had a couple of beers and they allegedly might have been around someone else who was smoking illegal marijuana. They would not have partaken of themselves. Maybe they did. But he said it was like he was living inside of a tin box. He said he was fucked up, and a totally new kind of fucked up.

Yeah, yeah. Which makes sense. If you've got this fucking devil's breath Colombian, that's what it's called? The Colombian's devil's breath? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, that spike, the Vice piece on that is incredible. If you haven't seen it, World's Scariest Drug. It's called Colombian Devil's Breath, and it's on Vice.

And Vice is, if you don't know, the greatest online source of fascinating documentaries, exposés, interviews. There's nothing better. And it's all because of this motherfucker, Shane Smith. Oh, thank you. Holla at your boy. Thank you, thank you. Holla.

But this Colombians Devil's Breath shit is fucking terrifying because they give it to people, and then the people just do your bidding. They have no idea. Yeah, it's amazing. It's really amazing. Did you watch it in person? No. I've seen the video.

I've seen the footage. I didn't do the shoot. But a lot of how it works is the prostitutes put these nose plugs up their nose, and they have like a condom or a balloon with some in it, and they put it in their mouth. And then what they do is when you go close, they sort of blow it into your face face and it's a ton of it. But they have the security camera footage

of people clearing out all their furniture in their house or people going to the bank machine and just taking all their money out because it's auto-suggestive. So you're in this sort of trance-like state and you're like, now do this. And you're like, okay, now I'll take my money out, and because it's auto-suggestive, so you're in this sort of like trance-like state, and you're like, now do this, and you're like, okay, and I'll take my money out, and now, you know, open your door, and so they, you know, it's apparently, this I haven't verified, but the Tonton Makut, the sort of zombie police in Haiti for those years under

Papadoc. That was scopolamine. That was the zombie drug. They called it the zombie drug, devil's breath. It's got different names everywhere, but it's like this autosuggestive drug. What a strange side effect or effect of drugs. It's crazy. It's crazy.

And this stuff is apparently very prevalent. I mean, it grows wild, right? Yeah, well, it grows in America. It's like making a poppy into heroin. It's the same sort of process of making an alkaloid. But it's incredible that it's the same stuff that they use for sleep, for seasickness. Yeah. Someone told me another thing that it was a part of some, you know, famous, like, you know, I don't know, Viagra, some sort of famous drug that everybody has.

It's part scopolamine. So it's just in what's the dosage. That's all it is. Yeah, exactly. This is incredible that that's scopolamine. Like, if you look at prevent motion sickness, Transderm Scope, it's actually called... Well, maybe it was motion sickness.

Maybe that was it, yeah. Yeah. Transdermscope.com. Well, seasickness is motion sickness. I'm pretty sure it's exactly the same thing. But that's amazing that it's that devil it, yeah. Yeah. Transdermscope.com. Well, seasickness is motion sickness. I'm pretty sure it's exactly the same thing. But that's amazing that it's that devil's breath shit. Well, according to Jimmy Kimmel, do not take that with beer and weed. Right, right.

Because it's a fucking bad ride. Bad ride inside a tin can. We could have tried the autosuggestive powers of it. Yeah, I wonder if that means maybe he did some terrible things and he doesn't even know. Maybe. Maybe someone had him. It's very strange that those two things are related

and that I guess you could just cover someone with those patches while they're asleep, just start sticking them all over their body. And their trip. And then they wake up and you're like, bitch, I own you. It's time to go to the ATM. Let's do it. Wake up. I wonder if that's ever been attempted.

I wonder if I'm fucking up because I suggested it and no one ever thought of it before. Now it's going to be a thing. Somebody's going to do that. Somebody has to be the first person. Everyone's going to go to the AM, PM covered in patches. Yeah, there's no way I could be the first. Give me all your fucking Twizzlers. I shouldn't have told people that that's the same thing.

I fucked up. Eddie, what do I do now? How do I get out of this show? With tremendous knowledge Comes tremendous power And responsibility Okay well what if you have Almost no knowledge But Wikipedia

How much responsibility Is in When you're just Google searching shit Is there a lot of On the line there How much do I owe I think you're good

Some kid's gonna have A great time And give away all his money You guys went with Dennis Rodman To fucking North Korea What kid's gonna have a great time and give away all his money um you guys went with dennis rodman to fucking north korea um what the fuck was that how's that happening and how the fuck is dennis rodman going back after homie just killed his uncle yeah well he's well you know look it's resurrected his career you know dennis rodman's yeah has it really yeah what is it what kind of

career does that resurrect? He's a basketball player What is the career now? Dude I saw him sponsoring barbecue restaurants In Koreatown all over Really? Motherfucker You totally got me dude

Oh that's funny You were fucking selling it too, son. I love creating Asian stereotypes and just fake Asian news. Well, the idea that all of a sudden Dennis Rodman is huge in the Asian community and just fucking selling everything they have. I'm like Asian Fox News, dude. I just make shit up. Is this it? This is it.

This is him in North Korea. Oh, yeah. Wow, that is so fucking uber strange, man. Well, okay, tell me, this was your second time there, right? This is after you guys had filmed that one piece that was exposing

all the weirdness about the restaurants and all that other shit, right? Yeah, no, so I went... Same time, or...? No, no, I went twice and did documentaries, and because I had been there,

I knew that they were crazy about A, basketball, but B, the Chicago Bulls. Uh-huh. I can't go back because of my previous two documentaries, but we knew that they loved crazy about a basketball but be the chicago bulls i can't go back because of my previous two documentaries but we knew that they loved the chicago bulls so we tried to put them together again to go to a tour but no one would except for rodman who was like signing

basketball cards in in denver or something and so he yeah he said i'll go and and and and obviously we needed more people than just him so you So the Globetrotters agreed to go. But we didn't know he would show up. We didn't know. We thought this would just be a way to get in and see some different shit. And then Kim Jong-un showed up. And then not only showed up, said, hey, come back to my house. And everyone went back to his house and got absolutely loaded and talked a bunch of crazy things.

Is he the only one that's allowed to wear that haircut in North Korea? What if somebody else wanted to rock that crazy haircut that Kim Jong-un has? There's actually only seven haircuts that are allowed by the state. Really? Serious? And they have to be done in a particular way. Like his haircut. Pause that back there, Jamie.

Number five? Bam. Look at that haircut. That's the five? That would be a haircut. Is that only his, Jamie. Number five. Bam, look at that haircut. That's the five. No, that would be a haircut. Is that only his? Well, you know what's interesting? So he looks, one of the reasons why they picked him,

because Kim Jong-il had a bunch of sons because he had a bunch of lovers, whatever, and this kid they weren't going to pick because he was educated in Switzerland, and that's the back west. But he had an older son who was picked up in like Tokyo which is an you just can't do that and another son that smashed a Ferrari in like Monaco and and you know in the poorest country in the world and they're fucking smashing Ferraris in Monaco but he the one of the reasons why he got in is because he looks exactly like his grandfather, Kim Il-sung, who was the founder. He was trained by the Soviets, and then he came down and he started the whole cult of

personality. The original Kim Il-sung. He looks so much like him that it's like it's like me being born looking exactly like abe lincoln they're just like this well he's just put him up there and so that that's why they put him up there and now he's he's now he's purging the shit out of people it's probably not him purging the shit out of people it's the generals behind him getting rid of the other generals that oppose them so these are the generals that were loyal to the previous administration his father's administration and they've criticized him is that what it is of the other generals that oppose them. So these are the generals that were loyal to the previous administration,

his father's administration, and they've criticized him? Is that what it is? No, I think the uncle has his own power, sort of thing. Had. Had. He was the mentor.

The uncle was supposed to be the mentor. Oh, no. And so this is them getting rid of the dowager, sort of. Uncle talked a little too much shit. Got a little too cunty. Yeah. A little disrespectful. Yeah.

Got a little disrespectful of yourself. I have to go. Got a little out of line yourself. Oh, really? No, no. Good fellas. Good fellas. You have me there.

Got a little out of line yourself. Remember the scene? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Fucking Joe Pesci kills the guy? Oh, yeah, yeah. Got a little out of line yourself. Yeah. And Robert De Niro and him stomp the guy to death.

Yes. Get your shine box. Remember that guy? Yeah, Billy Bathgate. Yep. Billy Bathgate. There you go. Yeah. And Robert De Niro and him stomped the guy to death. Yes. Get your shine box. Remember that guy? Yeah, Billy Bathgate. Yep. Billy Bathgate. There you go. Yeah.

So he killed the uncle and then hired the wife of the uncle, gave her a new position. Yeah, although I read something recently about the wife that now she's been detained

or something's happened. I didn't see that yet. Something's happened there. Well, I had also read that maybe the wife had a plate apart in it that she was trying to get rid of him. Who the fuck knows? She was tired of her husband, trying to stick it in her butt or something. I mean, Kerry gave a crazy interview about it too

where he was just openly talking about how he's killing off people and how it's making him nervous. And it was interesting to see a diplomat just go balls to the wall with it. I was like, wow. Well, remember when Kerry was like fucking sounding the war horns for Syria and the entire government, the entire country was like, um, no, like no one, not Fox news, not CNN, not fucking anybody was like, this is a good move for America. We need to go to war with Syria.

Everybody was like, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho. We need to go with a Russian-backed Syria. Russia on one side, us on the other. Well, we've seen where this ends up. Is that one of the first times you've seen in your lifetime where the United States, the people, literally said, fuck this, and the government backed off. Well, for sure. And it was such a black eye because actually Putin said, oh, I'll negotiate this plan because they're backing Assad.

Yeah. And we were going to back the other side so it's a Cold War fight again. And Putin comes up with a peace plan and we were so embarrassed that we went, yeah, okay, we'll take your peace plan. We'll take Russia's peace plan, who we were about to go to war with. He seemed so reasonable in the peace plan, too. It's like, this guy who's essentially the czar of Russia

is more reasonable than the United States. Well, you just got back from there. Russia is one of the most unfriendly. It has to be the most unfriendly. Unfriendly and anti-American. What's interesting is you would think that the Cold War never ended. Yeah. Because you unfriendly and anti-American. Like, what's interesting is you would think that the Cold War never ended.

Yeah. Because you go there and the anti-American, anti-Western rhetoric is crazy and they blame everything.

Russia's economic problems, that's the Americans' fucking financial crisis. You know, this thing, well, that's the Americans spending

too much on the arms race. Oh, the problem with the gas going into Europe, that's the Americans flooding the shit with all their fucking gas. And the racism's overt. Overt, yeah, yeah, yeah. What the gas going into Europe, that's the Americans flooding the shit with all their fucking gas.

And the racism's overt. Overt, yeah, yeah, yeah. What the fuck, man? When was the last time you went to Russia? I was there three months ago. Oh, wow.

Yeah, that's around the same. I was probably there right before you were there. And, no, it was, it's not a happy place. You get off there, you go on the train. I took the train around there. Man, it's a happy place. You get off there. You go on the train. I took the train around there.

Man, it's a depressing place. It's pretty sad. A buddy of mine went there to film a film, film a film, film a movie, and he got hit in the face with a metal pipe. Sure. They hit him in the teeth with a metal pipe, smashed all of his teeth. He woke up with a mouthful of blood and broken teeth. All of his money's missing.

Shoes were missing. It was the cops too, right? He doesn't know who the fuck it was. He turned a corner, and someone just fucking faced him with a pipe. Yeah, it's a violent place. Cops shake people down there on the regular. Just civilians, the cops will shake them down. Yeah, man.

That's a dark place. That's a dark place that's lost a lot of its sons as well. You got a lot of beautiful women there that are growing up hard. A lot of liver stealers. You know what I'm saying yeah wake up with stitches oh groggy connected to an iv yeah no you get that feeling out there man like as an american it's not a it's not a friendly place some hostile type shit hostile as in hostile the the fucking movie where they steal your liver yeah i don't want that or they just tortured

people and killed them or something yeah it seems hostile which is why it's so scary to think about going to war with hardened people that were controlled by the Mongols for over 200 years. The Mongols came. I mean, everybody tried to conquer Russia. Napoleon lost 60% of his troops trying. And the Mongols came in there in the winter. They came in in the winter and fucked everybody up and just dominated the whole country for a couple hundred years.

Yeah, dude. Mongolia is the most magical place I have been this year. The last few years. What way magical? It's very cool because there are parts of it that remain untouched. You walk far enough, you drive far enough into the desert. There are places where it's just like, man, I feel like original man. Well, these people don't know the size of the steppe.

The size of the steppes of Mongolia, the steppe meaning it's the area sort of like an ocean with all the water taken out of it, is twice as big as the Atlantic Ocean. Twice as wide as the Atlantic Ocean. It's just this flat plain, and's where where gingus khan was birthed you ever see the movie mongol yeah yeah it's a good movie the funny thing is well not funny mongolians don't like that movie really yeah there's another gang as khan movie coming out but they feel like they weren't depicted properly in the movie mongol well they should

be happy they got john wayne to playenghis Khan, the original. Because he fucking knocked it out of the park. That shit was authentic as fuck. You ever see John Wayne as Genghis Khan? I've never seen it. It's one of the worst pieces of American film

or culture, period. It's diggity dog shit. It sounds bad. The best thing on the Mongols, without a doubt, I say this all the time, but if you haven't heard it, Dan Carlin's Hardcore History.

Wrath of the Khan. It's a five-part five two plus hour long podcast on the mongols and it's fucking magical it's amazing just the the sheer numbers that he drops on you the mongols killed so many fucking people they killed 11 of the entire population of the earth wow yeah one out of every 500 dudes in china is related to genghis khan wow yeah directly i did that dna online my brother did the dna online test and like we have dna from there obviously damn you got con dna yeah like well they say like what they'll say is your dna comes from this region and like it was mongolia or Korea you know so

the interesting thing though is when you go to an old country an old culture like Mongolian culture the wisdom has like been passed down like you see these things people have this like patience about them and they

I was in the desert and I was talking to these people I was like look the mines are coming the mines are threatening your way of life are you worried that like there will be no nomads in the desert and I was talking to these people. I was like, look, the mines are coming. The mines are threatening your way of life. Are you worried that there will be no nomads in the next generation? And they're like, yeah, we're worried about it. We know that this way of life is going by the wayside, but we've persevered. We've been through a lot.

We've seen a lot of things. Our people have always persevered. And it's interesting to, they have this confidence in that because it's such an old culture. It's such an old culture and at one point in time, such an incredibly dominant culture. They're very proud of it. They're really proud of it. They have Genghis Khan on their money. The guy killed in his lifetime 5-0 million.

Between the low numbers are 20, the high number is like 70. Wow. And a lot of people say somewhere between 40 and 50. Wow. Million people with horses and bows and arrows. They killed everybody. Yeah. It's unbelievable how much damage this one guy,

this is John Wayne as gang as con. You got to hear him talk because it's goofy as fuck He didn't even try to have a correct accent No, nor did he do what would they always do in movies where they speak in a language that nobody else speaks, where they go with a British accent. Right, right. Which is always a good move. I mean, he looked like He-Man.

That shit was terrible. That shit was like the rifleman goes to Mongol. Wasn't it? He's fucking stupid old movies, man. It's like James Bond where he has to become Japanese To get on the island And it's just so bad And they're all like, yep, he's Japanese Tom Cruise as the last samurai

That stuff is just goofy At least Tom Cruise played a white guy He was supposed to be a white guy I was like, man, it's the last samurai And the last guy that lives is Tom fucking Cruise Of course it can't be It has to be a white guy I was going to be the last one

He's not be a white guy. I was going to be the last one. Well, he's not. I'll show you how to do it. He's not just a white guy. He's got more alien in him than anybody else. Not only that, if there's an accident, he has to stop because only he knows what to do because he's a Scientologist. You're just an SP. Have you ever seen that speech? No.

Where he gives in front of the Scientologist. It's fucking beautiful. It's a Scientology recruitment speech. He's talking about when you're a Scientologist, you know that if you pass by an accident, you're the one who needs to stop. You're positive. You've got that fucking Scientology energy working for you.

And everyone else is an SP, so you've got to get in there. What's an SP again? Suppressive personality. That's me, dog. I'm all about suppressing. Yeah. Can't just let it go. Can't just let it loose.

I've got fetons in me that you don't even fucking know about. Do you have fetons in you? A lot of them. Does everybody have a feton in them? I have a lot. This is, look at this. First of all, he won the Olympics. I'm off the fucking.

My fetons are off the track. Oh my God. Look, they gave him a gold medal. He won the Olympics of the world. And he's standing in front of this gigantic thing that's right out of a fucking movie. Like a Lex Luthor thing. I find him to be incredibly arousing right there. He's impressive.

He's impressive. Okay. These are the times we will all remember. Were you there? What did you do? I think you know that I am there for you. And I do care so very, very, very much. So what do you say?

Are we going to clean this place up? Is he talking about Earth? Are you going to go out there in the ocean? Are you going to stop Fukushima, Tom? To LRH. To LRH. L. Ron Hubbard, a man who was a terrible science fiction writer, who was quoted as saying that if you really want to control things,

start your own religion. Okay, so Mr. Debunker. Wow. Mr. Debunker. Who, me? Yeah. Is that me? Is it true that Scientology was started as a bet to see who could do the best cult?

That is the rumor, but I think it's essentially hearsay. I think it's hearsay. Well, obviously he started it. Obviously he created it. I mean, there's no getting around that. If you want to know what the actual history of Scientology is, look no further than the South Park episode because the South Park does it massive justice,

and they keep saying this is the actual work. They show you this is what they actually believe. They also do that for Mormons, and that's beautiful as well. It's terrible science fiction. It's just like Battlefield Earth. Like that movie that they made, the Travolta movie, which is magically bad. So good.

I didn't watch it. Really? Magically bad. I think he put like 80 million of his own money in to make it. Travolta? No. First of all, how did he get 80 million? Second of all, that's a bad investment.

Because the fucking movie is dog shit. But it's good. No, it's so bad, it's the fucking movie is dog shit. But it's good. No, it's so bad, it's good. You need to just get really fucked up on an edible and sit through Showgirls. And then when the edible really kicks into a strong peak and you're really worried about the future of all your friends and the earth itself, that's when you put on Battlefield Earth. Then you know we're all going to be okay. Yeah, you're going to be fine. By the time it's coming off, you're like, oh, this is not good.

Now I know where your positivism comes from. Mockery. God damn. We're out of time. All right. But that was awesome, as usual. You guys are the shit. We've got to do this again.

We love you, man. Whose idea was this? Is this your idea to put this together? Oh, it was my idea. Whoever's idea it was. It was brilliant. It was such a fucking perfect idea. It's my three favorite men's. idea. It's my three favorite men.

Well, you're my three favorite men. How about that? Shane Smith, 30. That's his Twitter. Why Shane Smith, 30? Because Shane Smith was gone. But why 30? Just turned 30.

Yeah, just turned 30. Okay, and Eddie Huang is H-U-A-N-G. Mr. Eddie Huang, H-U-A-N-G. Mr. Eddie Huang, H-U-A-N-G. And where could people sample your fine dining in New York City? 238 East 14th Street at Bauhaus. At Bauhaus. I'm there at the end of January, so I'll be there, man. It's your fucking house then.

No, it's your house. I don't want to take it. I just want to be a guest. No responsibilities, man. I'm on vacation. Dude, love's your house. I don't want to take it. I just want to be a guest. No responsibilities, man. I'm on vacation. Dude, love you. Thank you very much for doing this. Thank you very much.

Always. Thank you, Joe. Such a good conversation. Rogan, Rogan, Rogan, Rogan Nation. Powerful Joe Rogan. Settle down. Thanks, everybody, for tuning in. Thanks to Lumosity.

Go to Lumosity.com slash Joe and try that shit today, son. Get your dome in shape. You know you need it. Stop fronting. We're also brought to you by Stamps.com. Go to Stamps.com and do everything that you would do at the post office right from your desk. Buy and print official U.S. postage using your own computer and printer. Print postage for any letter or package the instant you need it.

Then the mailman picks it up. It's over, bitches. Your game is done. Go to stamps.com and use the offer code JRE for your $110 bonus offer. We are also brought to you by Onnit. That's O-N-N-I-T, makers of Alpha Brain. Use the code name Rogan And save yourself 10% off any and all supplements. December 27th. I will be at the Mirage. In Las Vegas, Nevada. With Ready. Greatest lineup of all time.

Joey motherfucking Diaz. Brian motherfucking Callen. And Ari motherfucking Shafir. All in Vegas with me. One night. December 27th. We're trying to blow it out of the fucking back. And then, of course, New Year's Eve at the Melrose Improv in Hollywood.

I'm there with the lovely and talented Sam Tripoli and Super Twink, a.k.a. Tony Hinchcliffe. That's his new stage name. And we'll be back tomorrow with the one and only Duncan Trussell. Oh, shit. It's a celebration. Then Monday, Joey Diaz. Next week, Roseanne Barr as well. We're not fucking around, people.

Merry Christmas. Happy New Year. Go fuck yourself, Mayans. You were wrong again, bitches. Wrong again. Thank you.