The Joe Rogan Experience - #557 - Bryan Callen

Episode Date: October 7, 2014

Bryan Callen is an actor and stand-up comedian, and together with Brendan Schaub he also hosts "The Fighter & The Kid" podcast available on Spotify.

Appearing at the Atlanta Improv October 16th, 17th, and 8th. That's how my daughter does punchlines. My former. My four-year-old, rather. My former. My four-year-old daughter. She goes, what kind of tree grows in your hand? A palm tree!

And then she'll hit the same punchline over and over again. Over and over? Yeah, it's hilarious. Do it with formality, and I want enthusiasm. Appearing at the Atlanta Improv. It's the one and only Brian motherfucking Callan. October 16th, 17th, and 18th. God damn it, I have to sneeze.

No way, the kid, the kid. What, dude, in the middle of my. I'm gonna. Ah, damn it. In the middle. Brian Callan, Brian the Kid, I'll be the crowd. Brian the Kid, no way, in the middle of my... I'm going to... Ah, damn it. In the middle. Brian Callen. Brian the Kid. I'll be the crowd.

Brian the Kid. No way. In person. I hear he's way better looking and super athletic. He's beautiful. I hear the way he moves. He's beautiful on the inside, too. There it is.

I don't mean his butt. I mean his soul. Jesus. Adorable. October 16th, 17th, and 18th. The Atlanta Improv. If it's like any of the other improvs, it's awesome. The Improv is the premier comedy club chain in the country.

And if you're nowhere near Atlanta, if you happen to be in Philadelphia or Washington, D.C., I'm at the Tower Theater on Friday, October 7th in Philadelphia, and then I'm at the Warner Theater on Friday, Saturday, rather, October 18th.

Both of those gigs, the October 18th one in Washington, D.C., the Warner Theater in Washington, D.C., both those gigs are with Ian Edwards. So the 17th in Philadelphia. He's awesome. I love Ian. He's a fucking legit high-level headliner.

So Philadelphia, October 17th, and then Washington, D.C., October 18th. That's for me. And Brian Callen is October 16th, 17th, and then Washington, D.C., October 18th. That's for me. And Brian Callen is October 16th, 17th, and 18th. And Brian Callen is back in motherfucking civilization. Yes, ladies and gentlemen. Five days in the rain, sleeping on a slant, pooing outside. I'm not sick, but I do have something going on with my nose.

Well, it's L.A LA air after all that pristine. Yeah. We got dropped off 1,300 feet above sea level in a seaplane. It took three planes. In a seaplane, get dropped off on a lake, a mountain lake that you could drink out of, which we did drink out of. We drank out of the lake. That's how clean it is.

Yeah, it's rainwater. Yeah, it's made of rain. There's not even any fish in that lake, which is really crazy. It's weird, right? It's a huge lake, and there's no rivers that go into it. And there's also several lakes on Prince of Wales Island. I mean, maybe there's a couple of fish in there, I don't know about. But we didn't see any.

It's clear, crystal clear water. And there's several layers. Like, some of them are up high and other ones are like you know a few hundred feet below it there's another lake it's really weird also when you're hiking through that terrain you'll cut through the woods and like just cutting through this rainforest and then you just come across this clearing with another little pond or lake it's like everywhere there's lakes it gets more rain more rainfall than any other place in America. It's 160 inches of rainfall.

Apparently, Rinella said it's one of the biggest islands in America next to the Hawaiian Islands. It's bigger than the big Hawaii island. Prince of Wales Islands, I believe, is actually bigger. That's what our friend Matt said. That's crazy. I believe Rinella said it was half the size of the Hawaiian Islands.

Let's find out how big it is. of the Hawaiian Islands. Oh, okay. I don't know. Okay, let's find out. Let's find out how big it is. Prince of Wales Island. We spent our entire time in basically wet, even though you're wearing rain gear, and nothing dries out. Nothing. First day my shirt got wet, it never dried out. Yeah.

It's the fourth largest island. After Hawaii, Kodiak, and it's one-tenth the size of Ireland. Whoa! Slightly larger than the state of Delaware. That's crazy. And oh, by the, oh, and very important, didn't see any, didn't see any, basically you'd be, you'd be, I mean, it's a huge island, man, three planes to get there. I'm looking through my binoculars, how many deer?

I saw one. Yeah, there wasn't a lot of deer. Well, I saw two, two does, which i couldn't shoot it was not one we can't according to ranello we went there at a bad time which is fucking weird since he was the guy hosting the goddamn show that means the deer right that means the deer even the deer were like this sucks let's go to lower land the deer were like it's too rainy and windy here let's let's move down even the deer were like see ya yeah the rainy and windy here. Let's move down. Even the deer were like, see ya. Yeah, the deer went towards the ocean.

The humans with their fire sticks. We saw very few animals, but it was still unbelievably beautiful. And it was so clean. That's the weirdest thing about the air there. It was so clean that when we got to L.A., we both were like, ew. We smelled the air. I almost panicked. My nose closed up immediately.

For real. Remember? At the airport. I mean, granted, we were in traffic, but I was shocked. My system went, what? It started closing down. Well, we were breathing in this moist, clear air. Drinking clean water.

Look, I'll take this over that every fucking day of the week, first of all. I just want to get that out of the way. Like, especially because we didn't have a house. We were camping. And if you've ever camped in the rain, you might be able to pull it off for a day. You might be able to pull it off for two days. But once you start getting to that fifth day, oh, God, does it suck a fat one. You know what was happening to me?

I was becoming, like, a fetishistic, whatever the word is, about my gear. Like how to keep everything dry. And I was even like making my sandwiches secretly in the tent. I would steal away. Remember when you said, you were like, were you making sandwiches? I was like, huh? You took mayonnaise and bread and meat and went into your tent. And I hid and I was like, fuck those guys.

I'm eating a sandwich. I'm eating a dry sandwich. They're assholes. I was turning on the whole camp. Well, I got a little bit better at figuring out how to deal with the rain. But at one point, you know, we wore these headlamps. So they're like a mining hat sort of thing on the top of your forehead. You have this light and it's attached to a strap.

And I turned it on. I turned my strap on inside the tent and it was like a sea of dew like the inside of the tent like everywhere you look it was like it was raining these microscopic drops of water it was like looking out into a downpour a microscopic droppour. So there's these tiny little drips everywhere. But the inside of the tent was filled with moisture. Yeah. Everything. Your sleeping bag was wet.

My sleeping bag had a sheen. 51 degrees. It's really fun to sleep in that. Oh, it's a good time. You could take your hand and you rub it over the top of my sleeping bag and your hand would be wet. Right. And the inside was wet.

Like my hands got wet. Wool is fucking amazing yep okay if you're wearing cotton out there in this kind of weather you're really fucked but wool is an incredible material when you're wearing wool wool somehow or another even if the clothes are wet you retain heat yeah it's really incredible oils and the wool i guess and also wool wicks away moisture from the body for whatever reason but does it because it must i don, and also wool wicks away moisture from the body for whatever reason. But does it? Because it must. I don't know.

It must wick away, but not totally. It dries quickly. You ever notice that? Apparently, it dries quickly, but they say cotton kills. If you're in wet, cold environments, and you're hiking or whatever, and you wear cotton, that's how people die. Yeah, because you sweat, and then you get wet, and then you get freezing cold. We were in a constant state of, when you're hiking,

first of all, we're following, you weren't, but I was, following Steve the Billy Goat Rinella. This fucker does this shit 365 days a year. I'm lucky that I'm in good shape, and lucky also that I work my legs out like crazy.

Those poor guys are like, oh, I guess you skipped leg day. You ever see those guys? They look like a meatball with two sticks. They'd be dead. Terrible hunting bodies. I work my legs out more than any other part of my body because of kickboxing. I'm always doing squats.

My legs really didn't get tired even though it was five days of pretty intense hiking. But my cardio got tested. Seriously. I was sweating got tested, seriously. And I was sweating like a fucking pig. So you'd get to the top of this. First of all, I didn't layer it right. When we talked to Ma Ting,

one of our friends that we met down there. Shout out to Ma Ting. Shout out to... The Latvian prince. All the Latvians. And Giannis, his brother. Another shout out to my guy. Shout out to our friend Dean. Game eye. Our English friend Dean. Great fucking guy. All the people there. Mike, shout out to shout out to our friend dean our uh our english friend dean yeah great fucking guy all the people there mike shout out to mike from austin cool fucking crew just a great doughty shout out to fucking dan the beautiful doughty awesome dan doughty everybody

is beautiful it's a great cat like we had a fucking legitimately awesome time it's one of the most miserable conditions the world we laughed laughed. Yeah. We laughed the whole time. Other than freezing cold, it's the most miserable because you're just drenched all the time. I guess, actually, I would take that, honestly, over desert conditions, like 130 degrees. That might be a nightmare because there's no water. Yeah. But my hands were pruning. My hands were so wet for so long. Forget gloves, by the way.

Your hands are just going to be wet. They don't work. They look like they've been in a pool for you know two days but those again those first light those wool gloves the fucking wool even though your hands are wet it keeps your hands warm it's really weird i don't know how it works first light is a company that sponsors uh l-i-t-e first light they sponsor meat eater podcasts we got a bunch of their gear and our friend ryan callahan works for them and everything they make is merino wool and i was like why this is wool what the fuck is wool yeah wool is the shit it's the shit in cold weather you gotta get wool and layer layer because you keep warm actually people wear really tight stuff is the wrong thing to do

you want to keep an air pocket around your body that's how animals keep warm so martin was telling me you should really wear very little when you go out and then keep everything else in your pack that would have been the smart thing to do i didn't do it that way i put all the layers on so by the time i got to the top of the mountain i'm fucking i'm literally drenched my legs are drenched my upper body's drenched and then you have to sit down and you glass so glassy means you use your binoculars so you sit down you're looking for deer. Who are in there? There are no deer. There's no fucking deer.

So we're sitting there looking for deer freezing my dick completely off. And you do well in the cold but that's the first time I've ever seen you shiver. Yeah. Like you were shaking

you were so cold one time. I think it was the morning you came in and you were like because you had been you'd been spent all night wet and you came in and I was like I knew you were too much to say anything but i was literally like

get him a get him a thermos full of hot water to put in his jacket because he's i actually got a little protective over here oh sweetie well you were like you were shaking man yeah that was definitely that was no joke it's it was cold i mean in the morning it was probably in the 40s it was it was not the most fun being wet and But I'm telling you, it's better than being hot. As weird as it sounds, it sucks a fat dick. But you could warm up just by running up hills. If I wanted to, while I was freezing, I could just go, Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck!

And just went running up a hill. And I would have been warm by the time I got to the top of the hill. I would have been sweating again. But there is an art to learning how to... Like Matin said, you you climb the mountain he'll climb to the top of the mountain t-shirt and one layer sweats takes that t-shirt right off and puts two layers on that are dry that's smart and it puts that t-shirt back on when it's come time to come down and look we did this shit for on purpose we did it for fun for the adventure because we love ranella and we love the show and all the guys in the show but those fuckingamen, those guys who work on that show, Mike and Dean and, well, Doty's the producer.

Dan Doty's also a cameraman. Those guys that work on that show, Doty's a director too now and a producer. Yeah. But those guys that work on that fucking show, god damn, they have a hard job. Yeah, they do. Those guys, they're just getting paid. They're getting paid. That's what they do every week those guys and they're just getting paid they're getting paid that's what they do every week every week they're camping somewhere yeah freezing yeah

hungry you know where they're going next they're going in the jungle they're going down to fucking bolivia or something yeah some crazy shit with bugs where you get where i said dan are there things to worry about he goes he's been to the amazon a number of times he goes oh yeah i said like what he goes snakes spiders scorpions and bugs you've never seen before bugs that can change your life don't know about by the way by the way whenever brian counts here i by the way you see that myself to death i know it's contagious it's like hashtag by the way it's like when brody stevens is here you go enjoy it enjoy it yes you can't help yourself but they had that banana spider down there right or is that in the philippines i don't know i mean they have a lot of fucked up spiders in the amazon they have

thousands of things that people have never even discovered they're always finding new species of bugs down there yeah things that defy explanation they uh i don't like bugs man i'm not a fan i'm okay with other stuff i'm not i'm not okay with bugs like i i like i'll deal with like grizzlies like okay there's a grizzly i mean you'll be scared but bugs are the intangible like some huge stinging wasp that can fuck that or a spider that puts you in a necrosis like you know like the brown recluse your skin starts to decay jeremy horn had one of those and it left like a golf ball size hole in his leg good he left a fucking-sized hole in his leg.

Good God. He left a fucking hole. It just ate through his leg. Faire de lance. When snakes bite you, that happens. This guy got bit in the foot by a faire de lance, which means, which by the way, I believe means sword of fire. Faire de lance.

It's French. Faire de lance. Faire being fire. Faire de lance. Faire de lance. Un serpent. Faire de lance. By the way, Brian Callen did several characters over the time. One of the reasons why I love going on these trips with Brian is because it becomes a giant five-day comedy.

It becomes the Brian Callen show. Well, dude, it's my sort of captive audience. You're not going anywhere. Where the fuck are you going to go? But it's also your style of humor. It's like, that's what you do. Like, when there's a group of guys around, all of a sudden... I mean, you would think that you would get tired of gay jokes after five days. No, because he's got a bunch of different gay characters. Of course, Ivan, the Russian.

Ivan, the Russian, who makes you eat salad for many days before he fucks you in the ass because he wants your asshole clean. You gotta have a clean asshole. You have to keep clean. Your asshole has to be clean. Just salad, I smack you. clean asshole you have to you have to keep clean your asshole has to be clean just sell it i smack you this this video of him explaining to steve rinella what he wants rinella's diet to be like doty's thinking about putting it online like somehow or another figuring out how to put it

online do it an unnamed way it's mostly because i have you as an audience and there's you're one of the best laughers i just realized that after knowing you for 20 years I was like you know what I think he might be one of the greatest laughers because you you cackle you literally when you're laughing you literally go ha ha ha ha ha is it h-a h-a h-a h-a how the fuck I it's seductive to me I I'm literally it's seductive and then those guys are those guys are such good audiences too well it's just you know we were talking about how some comedians are just not good

at being like an audience member and one of the things that when Brian and I first met Brian was on this show called Mad TV

and I was a guest on the show and Brian and I were hanging out in the cafeteria we were eating dinner and while we were eating dinner

Brian was making me laugh he was cracking me up but we were with a few other actors and instead of laughing at brian they were trying to one-up him yeah and i was like ew this is so gross like you can't even just let a guy be funny like it's one thing if like comedy in those certain circumstances is like it's it's a totally intuitive thing it's a totally intuitive thing. It's like you have to know if you actually have something funny to say or not. Again, if there's something funny that you can do, you gotta feel it and you just gotta run with it.

And no one can understand it. No one can explain when something's going to be funny and when something's not going to be funny. It's completely, totally instinctive. But what these guys were doing was like being like ultra super calculated and competitive they weren't really listening right they weren't being affected i was thinking about you know it's it's very underrated quality when you have a friend who can really laugh at the at things oh yeah that's a really fun thing to have around yeah bravo is great for that that's a really you know that's a really, really pleasant thing to be around.

My sister was my first audience. My sister couldn't laugh her ass off at things. I remember as a kid her laughing really hard at me, cackling. And I was like, oh, I think I might be funny. That was the first thing where I was like, my sister actually laughs at me. Maybe I can do this, you know? That's funny, man. Yeah.

That's funny. So from Montana to Wisconsin to now, well, we failed in this attempt. This is the only time, well, I shouldn't say that because the TV show is going to air. Whoops, cat's out of the bag. Great show either way. It's going to be a lot of fun. Yeah, it is. But we had a great time in every circumstance.

Like even though we're in like one of the worst, most uncomfortable positions you could find yourself in. Constantly drenched. No hope in sight. Your only hope for shelter is this cloth house that you're sleeping in that's the size of a small car. You're climbing into a VW Bug that's a cloth house. And inside it, you're wet. And that's your shelter.

And it's not an even surface. Good luck finding an even surface in Alaskaaska everything hurt too man like when i would get up my back would hurt my neck would hurt my shoulders would hurt because i have to sleep on my side you know so well you know the first two days i i was so tired from hiking my my legs and my hips because i hadn't had any in my back i'm a bitch i'm not as stout as you are. I'm simply not as stout. I prepared for this. Remember when I was going to bed? You were like, you're going to bed?

I was like, no, I'm just going to go to my... I have to just work out. I'm going to go just read. I have to take care of something. I was literally out, dude. Yeah, you were snoring. I really prepared for this. I always work out, but I did a lot of stair climber for this.

You're a dick, man. I didn't do shit. Of course you did. That's smart. And I did a lot of elliptical on, like, very heavy, like, I put the elliptical on, like, number 21 and just fucking... And I would do sprints. Yeah.

Well, I should have done that. I knew. I should have just run hills with a pack on my back. Well, also, I did a lot of bodyweight squats. Bodyweight squats and pistol squats. Pistol squats are important because there's a lot of times you're picking yourself up with one leg yeah you know like you're uh you're you're we were first of all i don't know how you guys did it but renella will climb up some treacherous fucking surfaces well they told me that the janice told me that we were

moving at a straight of simple pace like not a hard pace he goes and he said you have no idea how fast he goes have you ever been with re He goes, and he said, you have no idea how fast. He goes, have you ever been with Ronella? I said, no. I said, you have no idea how fast he moves. And that's when he said it. He said, we were literally moving at our own time. Well, Remy Warren, I don't know if they've ever tested Ronella's cardio, but Remy, who's also a big-time hunter, he hunts 300 days a year,

he's got that show Solo Hunter, and he's got a few shows that he's working on right now with Dan Doty. A fascinating guy. But his cardio is so good. It's at like elite endurance athlete levels. They tested his cardio. And his VO2 max is like off the charts. And it's because he's usually got 100 pounds of elk on his back.

And he's climbing uphill. And it's 9,'s usually got a hundred pounds of elk on his back and he's climbing uphill And it's nine thousand fucking feet elevation and he does that all the time It's crazy He lives in Reno and he does a lot of his hunts a lot of his hunter mountain hunts He does mountain hunts in New Zealand during the offseason. He's constantly climbing up mountains Yeah, so your your lung capacity your ability kind of shape It's a different thing because you're also doing it all day Well, we've been now was telling me that he took these bodybuilders out with them these power lifter guys

And then there's big strong guys and you know So like what we're gonna do is gonna require, you know a lot of endurance and this like guys like we're fuck We're in incredible shape. Don't worry about it. He said literally 30 minutes in they were were throwing up. 30 minutes in. Wow. He's like, this is a long day. Like, do you understand that we're going to do this for eight hours, and you're throwing up? Because when you have, if you look at a guy like Rinella, okay, Rinella probably weighs 175, 170, somewhere around there. He's a lean, thin guy.

661, maybe. Lean and thin, and been doing it his whole life. And his specialty is mountain hunting. So he's constantly climbing, which is great because he can give you all the tips on gear and what kind of shoes. It makes a big goddamn difference. I had two different types of shoes. One, because I knew that they were probably going to get soaked. And one, which worked out really good, the Schneeze.

And there's other ones that I won't name that sucked a fat one. They were terrible. They just were slippery. They didn't have the same kind of grip. And if you listen to Ronell, he'll give you the lowdown. This is the shit to wear. Get this because of that. Get that because of this. But his body,

his doesn't have a lot of mass. I weigh 30 pounds more than him. So I'm shorter than him. I weigh 30 pounds more than him. And I'm carrying a pack and a gun and all these things i'm not used to and you you know you're constantly trying to go like if you're bigger than that like a big power builder guy a big power lifter one of those 250 pound characters that extra 50 pounds will fucking sap your heart man it's how did they do how did they do terrible

yeah they were throwing up a half an hour in. They were done. I mean, he's like, literally, they were like, you know, an hour into the trip, they're stopped, hands on their knees. They don't train for it. It's a different body type. Well, powerlifters are terrible. Like, when you see them, like, doing jujitsu. This guy, Mariusz Pudzianowski, you know who he is? Yeah, I know.

Super fucking. Strongest man in the world for a while. Just unbelievable brute of a man. Yeah. Started fighting MMA. Yep. And Tim Sylvia, who has like...

Tim's a great fighter, but he does not have a good body, you know? Sorry, Tim, if you're listening. I mean, look, when he was in his best shape, like versus Rico Rodriguez

when he won the UFC heavyweight title... He's not Hector Lombard, in other words. He doesn't have one of those... It's just genetic. It's just genetic. It's 100% genetic.

I mean, he's pigeon-toed. That's i mean i think unless kelly starrett says that's not he's probably right i've always felt like people who walk like that it's just the way they're born but i bet that could be corrected he thinks it's emulating kelly kelly who created this crazy ball that you're supposed to roll on your back this wad i forget what this is called work out of the day i forget what this is called supernova that's what it's called this is the latest and greatest of those things that you roll on to massage your back oh i bought three of these they're fucking amazing i don't want to go anywhere without one yeah i one of um students gave me this and uh i just started ordering them to leave them in the office

leave them around the house they're amazing awesome. But anyway, Sylvia, who is not a bodybuilder, he's not a powerlifter, he's just a really strong guy. He fought Pudzianowski and beat the shit out of him. Because he tired him, dragged him into deep water, and then fucked him up. But Pudzianowski's goddamn crazy for challenging Tim Sylvia, former UFC heavyweight champion. Yeah, that is nuts. He had like two MMA fights. Sylvia, light him up. He's built like this.

It's really weird you're talking about this because today my wife was having breakfast with the wife of two former NFL greats or really good players, giants. Andre Carter, who played for 13 years as a defensive end. He's 6'5", 250. Looks like he's just a different kind of human being. And Marvell Smith, who was tackled for the Steelers for like 10 years. And they want to come hunting. She was like, oh, they would love to come hunting.

And the first thing I thought was, these men are 250 and 320 pounds or whatever, respectively. And I don't know if they can, and with their knees after playing football for 13 years, it's going to be very hard for them to climb a mountain. Yeah, a lot of those guys, they're done when they're old. It's just different. It's just a different kind of thing. Well, it's also, when you have damage to those primary joints, hips and knees, you really see the loss of mobility.

It's pretty goddamn substantial. Although, apparently, they have pretty amazing new artificial knees. They're getting better and better at it. Yeah. Dude, they're growing dicks. What i just i just tweeted it today and uh they've done this for folks who have um you know like issues micro phalluses or mutilation injury uh circumcision injuries things along those lines which is war injuries yeah anything along those lines. Or war injuries. Yeah, anything along those lines. Wait, so they're growing dicks? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Jamie, if you go to my tweeter, there's a dude named Vincent Salazar, Vincent Salazar 11. And it says, it may not be, his tweet to me is, it may not be a pill, but it will be a boob job for men. I don't know. Well, maybe they're printing out tissue the way they do with other tissue i didn't read it i gave it a cursory glance

but apparently they're about five years away they look rather small there i want to well this is just cells okay i want it just cells there i mean they're five years away from being able to grow laboratory dicks i want something with heft that that folds over when I'm holding it to pee. I want it to fold like in half. I want it to have a lot left over. What about this?

Would you take, like say, do you think the dudes who have like medium-sized dicks are going to take a chance and get their dick lopped off

and get a new one put on hoping that their body is going to accept it? That's a very, very sacred part of a man right i mean that's that's a huge like if you were going into that as a venture capitalist with the assumption that men would do that i would tell you not to put your money into it i would tell you to put your money into it because there's some dudes out there with some one inch

dicks well that's a whole different story but But if you have a medium dick, I would imagine, you know. A medium dick. I've got a normal, functional dick. You have a giant dick. But there was a guy, there was this guy that was a performance artist and part of his performance art

was that he would take all his clothes off. And he had a dick that was, and I'm not bullshitting, the size of the last digit of my pinky. It was incredible. I've been in enough acting classes

and seen enough nude scenes and there are some dudes and one dude who was just a macho guy. He was a hairdresser and he did a naked scene and I am telling you, I am telling you, I can see just the head of it

in a sea of black hair. We had a date on Fear Factor and there was a naked Fear Factor, the one and only naked Fear Factor where we got in trouble for it because we made these people do a naked fear factor the one and only naked fear factor where we got in trouble for it because we made these people do a naked fashion show but they took their clothes off they went out in the runway and they spun around and this one guy was this fucking yoked up dude looked like he was a like a macho guy he had the tiniest oh no and he talked

about it beforehand he's like all right here we go and he went out there like a fucking stud good for him god bless him you know what yeah damn yeah he was like you know what here's my dick i got a personality and i'm and i can bench more than everybody in this room well he's like you know hey man i didn't fucking fail dick school like this is what i was born with yeah it's all good but maybe he would lop it off and get one of these giant ones yeah i mean if you could add tissue to your to your wang hey by the way i wonder if it would most guys with 12 inch sticks would be like i'll add another inch no fucking way sure no guys are extreme guys are like yeah i'll add some stuff well that would be like those crazy girls who have

breast implants that are just unbelievably ridiculous like basketball sized and they can't they want to get them bigger that's a lot of guys that there's this there's a lot of guys and i don't know if it's just the gay community but that especially did it was two guys in the gay community who were shooting their dicks with silicone uh liquid silicone and saline too they do that yeah and so it created this and the problem was it just created this amorphous blob that they would stuff into jeans and they'd be like check this out sorry about my dick yeah sorry about my piece like lumpy just stretching my sergio valentes all fucking the outside of it was all pudgy and dimpled oh dimpled like cottage cheese dick what's that bump i don't know silicon gone awry damn silicon so unpredictable i mean you think about like like when people have uh

cellulite on their legs imagine if you got that on your dick like you have a cellulite dick have you ever like some of those medical journals i sat next to a a dermatologist oh no a plastic surgeon um and she was going through her um ipad and she had pictures and i was sitting next to her she was asking me about acting and i was she was showing me the and some of them she she was really in a she was covering the faces of these patients with her hand so i wouldn't see their faces because she was that professional even on a plane she was trying to protect their privacy or whatever i saw this guy had a growth on his body, on his shoulder. It looked like a shoulder pad of skin, of cauliflower.

And I said, how do you take that off? She said, you don't. And I said, what do you mean? She goes, it's just too full of blood vessels. He would die. This is part of his body, and he has to have it. I go, so he just leaves a giant flap of cauliflower on his back and shoulders? He said, yeah, unfortunately.

It's just a deformity. Wow. And there are so many. You see those medical journals, and you're like, oh, boy. Some people don't realize how lucky you are. I do. After hiking in Canada, I do. Living in civilization.

Well, we're in Canada. We're in Alaska. I mean, Alaska. Alaska is America. Looks like it's Canada. Should be Canada. It's British Columbia. It's like around the corner. Well, we stole it from Russia, right? i do living in civilization well we're in canada we're in alaska i mean alaska america looks like it's canada should be canada it's british columbia is like around the corner well we stole it from russia right is that the deal probably they can have it back no fuck that that place is awesome man alaska good people in alaska oh then well that's one of the things that i realized when i

went to uh anchorage with ari when we went fishing and then we did did some shows up there at the Bear's Tooth. The thing about Alaska is that there's this insane wilderness around them and there's not a shit ton of people. So they developed this different kind of community. Even though Anchorage is a real city, there's a nice bond. I think it's because they may have to rely on each other in a real way. Oh, yeah. There's fucking bears. Look, dude, when we were in Anchorage, there was just that year a fucking kid on campus was killed by a moose.

What? Yes! Whoa. Yes! Well, listen, we met a guy, Matt, what's his last name? Matt. Which guy? The guy who took care of us.

Matt from Alaska. Yeah, Matt from Alaska, who drove us to the airport, sent our our bags just did us a solid that most people would never do in la matt hamilton matt hamilton you handed him your very expensive you know yeah stuff yeah he's well he's a good dude you know you could you you get a sense of people like in these communities where they're they're just it's not like the hustle and bustle of new york city where there's a million rats all stuck in a maze and everybody's fucking fighting for the last crumb of cheese and jammed up in traffic no these folks are fishing that guy was offering us fucking halibut you know you want some i got some frozen deer i can run back and get deer i mean that's

he caught 160 pound halibut crazy that's a person yeah it's i mean and the halibut. That's crazy. That's a person. Yeah. It's, I mean, and the halibut, it's like literally probably almost the size of this desk they were sitting at. I can't believe how big, it's like a giant flounder.

Yeah. Looks like a flounder on stairs. It's in the flounder family, yeah. Yeah. It's an amazing, amazing part of the world. And the fishing there is just, the waters are so rich.

Alaska truly is like the last wilderness, the last great wilderness. I love those shows like I don't know if you ever watched them but like they have a bunch of zero yeah do you watch those I haven't watched any of them fucking great man yeah life below zero is the best out of all those there's Alaska the last frontier which is pretty good too but I caught a little fuckery on that show you did yeah they're doing some fucking reality tv show bullshit like they had bear that was there, and they were running away from the bear,

and they were fishing on this river. The guy and his wife were fishing on the river, and they're like, we've got to get away from this bear. The bear's eating filleted salmon, so they baited the bear. They baited the bear to get there, and then they could film him. That's annoying.

The bear's eating a salmon. I'm looking at these clean, like, fillet marks where the fillets were removed from the body but the head and the tail remained. It wasn't anything that a bear did. The bear didn't catch that salmon and eat it there. And they didn't catch any salmon. So it was just bullshit.

They were like, Oh, the bears, we gotta get out of here. You can kind of tell whenever they're acting a little bit too. It's unfortunate, but that always happens in those goddamn shows, man they they run out of shit to do but life below zero they follow five different people or six different people and there's always something that these people are doing because they have to prepare for like the river rising they have to prepare for bears are coming into camp they have to prepare for all these different things. So fascinating stuff.

Nature, you know, it's interesting because if you look at anything in nature, including human beings, whether it's, you know, an ant or a spider rolling something, a web, whatever it is, everybody in nature is constantly fighting nature. It's a fight just to survive. If you want to survive out there, you can see men man has always kind of pitted himself against nature just the constant struggle of trying to push yourself into a situation where you don't have to deal and contend with nature we've done a pretty good job of it you know by by figuring out ways to innovate and ways to control our environment stuff but if you if you had to scratch out a living and look at at animals. I mean, you can watch deer who don't move very much because they have to conserve energy.

And they have to stay in one area, and they eat in that one area, then they move down to lower land. But a lot of times, guess what happens that people don't realize with deer? They starve to death. Oh, not just sometimes. Like, often. Often. It happens all the time. It's brutal. Most of these people that are against hunting or that think that somehow or another that nature is supposed to be this peaceful thing,

they don't understand what the reality of the life of these animals is. Teddy Roosevelt had a great quote on people who don't understand hunting and people who have a problem with it who love nature. and people who have a problem with it who love nature. And he wrote that death by violence, death by cold, death by starvation, these are the normal ends of the noble and stately creatures of the wilderness. The sentimentalists who prattle about the peaceful life of nature, the peaceful, yeah, that's what he wrote, peaceful life of nature, do not understand its utter mercilessness life is hard and cruel and these oh okay wow this is a fucked up speech and

in what these sentimentalists call a state of nature yeah Yeah, it's, in Hobbes, it's short and brutish. What is the expression? Short and brutish. Nature is tough. Well, you know what it is? It's indifferent. That was one of the things that we said when we got to this place. We're like, when we sat out there and looked out off you know

the top of those mountains and we looked at all this you feel so insignificant no people no people enormous enormous place not a fucking person

to be seen and one of the first things we were thinking was like it's so indifferent it just doesn't give a fuck it doesn't give a fuck if you're here

or well Ronella was saying also that you know the Native Americans that lived there were you know hundreds of years ago whatever, stayed on the coast.

They ate a lot of shellfish and fished. They didn't really go into the interior to get deer. It's just so difficult to do. Well, especially before they had firearms. It was very difficult. Can you imagine? I mean, you want to shoot an animal with a bow and arrow, especially an old school bow and arrow, you must get inside of 30 yards yeah 40 yards you're fucking really pushing it man even with a compound bow a 40 yard shot is very difficult to

be accurate with and those old bows like a lot of them just didn't have the amount of power to pull like the mongols had these crazy fucking bows but they required like 160 pounds of pull. Like you could probably shoot at a reliable 50, 60 yard distance with those if you got really good at it, but you're fucking practicing with those goddamn things every day. Sure. If you have a spear, get the fuck out of here. How far can you throw a spear? Can you even throw a spear 10 yards? I mean, how far can you reliably throw a spear?

Especially to make it, and throw it accurately. And hit an animal and kill it? Yeah, good luck. Or graze it and it's going to run off and go nowhere near you. So they hung around where the water was because shellfish and netting, you can net fish, and there was a more reliable way to capture meat. Were you with me when, who was telling a story about how the Inuit would bend a bone? They'd bend a bone and they would cover it in fat. Yes.

And it would be frozen fat, and then the polar bear would come, eat the bone, and the bone would open, expand in the polar bear's stomach or throat. And suddenly it would basically take three days to die, and they would follow it until it died and and then take the, just for the coat. Because they, that's how they kept warm. Well, one of the ways they used to kill wolves, they would take a knife, like a razor-sharp knife, and they would embed it into the ground, and then put blood on the knife. So the wolves would come along and lick the knife, and cut their tongue open, and bleed to death. And because they keep, well, they would keep licking, and bleeding, and licking, and bleeding.

Because they would taste the blood. Yeah. Yeah. And then they would just die there. Fucking dumb cunt wolves. Kind of genius. That's pretty brilliant. Well, you know, people are ingenious when they have to stay alive.

Yeah. And we obviously didn't have to stay alive. We had meals. We had food. We had, you know, we brought apples and protein bars and all kinds of shit. Plenty of complaining, though. Plenty of complaining. But think about if we had to live off the land while we were there.

What the fuck did we find? We found a couple salamanders. We saw a duck. Six or seven blueberries. Yeah, there was these blueberries. They were these microscopic, like a head of a match blueberries. And they tasted like powder. They tasted like nothing.

Good luck surviving, ladies and gentlemen. I ate a handful of them, and one of them was kind of sweet. But, like, you go to Whole Foods, you get these fucking juicy GM juicy gmo blueberries don't even know where they came from who cares they're tennis ball size you fucking bite down on them and blow up in your mouth and even then you're like i need more food yeah yeah death by violence death by cold death by starvation teddy roosevelt was a bad motherfucker yep the normal ends wasn't it't it Teddy Roosevelt who designated Yellowstone Park as a national park? I don't know. And Yosemite, I believe.

Did he? Yep. Smart man. Yes, he was. That's a good place for a national park. That's an unbelievably beautiful place. It's going to kill everybody eventually. With the super volcano?

Yes. I've been thinking about nothing else since you told me about that. Terrifying. That's the black swan, as they say. That's like everybody's going about their life, and all of a sudden, guess what? There's a super volcano that could eradicate life on Earth. Well, not just one. There's six of them worldwide, and two of them are in California, which is really crazy.

God, basically big zits on the Earth. Yeah, there's super volcanoes everywhere. There's super volcanoes all over the world. And there's not just one in yellowstone there's a there's a gigantic super volcano i think we said in indonesia that they think is responsible for the reason why there is only you know they believe that 75 000 years ago this super volcano in indonesia exploded and when it exploded they think that that's why all human beings have some sort of a relationship to each other that we all came from an original group of human beings

74 000 years ago toba it's uh it's a caldera volcano in sumatra it's ready for this hold on to your dick 1080 square,080 square miles. So people are living on top of it as we speak. No, I don't know if they are or not, but it's in Sumatra, Indonesia. And it's the only super volcano in existence that can be described as Yellowstone's big sister. 74,000 years ago, Toba erupted and ejected several thousand times more material than erupted from Mount St. Helens in 1980. Several thousand times more. Some researchers think that Toba's ancient super eruption and the global cold spell it triggered might explain a mystery in the human genome our genes suggest that we all come from a few thousand people just tens of thousands of years ago instead of from a much older bigger lineage as fossil evidence

testifies so we have the fossil evidence which shows a much older chromags yeah broader lineage but the people of today all come from a few thousand people that might have been the only fucking human beings that survived this goddamn super volcano 74 000 so that's why they can trace like a hot like uh hasidic jews in finland or in hungary africans yeah to africa yeah unbelievable and that's all 74 000 years ago man so so so so then the but we do find with the genome that some people have some chromagnon genes in right I think well we are Cro-Magnon. I think you're thinking of Neanderthal. I mean yeah, yeah Well, there's there's I think there's two obviously I'm an idiot

It's don't listen to me in Google list but I think there's debate on this because I think that some believe that these genomes are from a common ancestor and That I think there's debate as to whether or not people fuck Neanderthals or Neanderthals fuck people we interbred. Like I've joked around about it that I'm pretty sure someone in my past fucked a monkey. Like when people were like

just starting to not be monkeys anymore. You're really flexible. You got long arms. Let me just one more time. One more time. I'm just going to get back in there. And somehow the monkey got pregnant and went, what the fuck?

And then that's where my line came from. Simian genes. But I think that there's debate as to whether or not humans interbred with Neanderthals and that's why, or whether

or not we have a common ancestor. I don't think it's been completely figured out yet, but if Neanderthals were around, for sure somebody would fuck one.

Yeah. People fuck chickens. At least one person. I've seen people fuck chickens. My dad, my buddy was a figured out yet but if neanderthals were around for sure somebody would fuck one yeah people fuck one person i've seen people fuck chickens my dad my buddy was a cop he found a guy fucking a chicken in a car he was a family man and he had a chicken under a fucking towel and he goes what are you doing yeah i love that first of all i love that expression family man he's a family man he's a family man in San Francisco. He's fucking a chicken under a towel. Excuse me, sir. Is that illegal? I think it is illegal.

Like, they can arrest you for cruelty to animals or something. But then again, you eat chicken. I don't know. Yeah, isn't that weird that you can kill... But they had to make a... It's like public indecency. I think they get you on stuff like that. But you were fucking a chicken.

Although, how about this? That's a very good question because, yes, Your Honor, I fucked a chicken under a towel. It's my thing. Free country. You kill and eat chickens. Right. So I don't know. And I should be able to fuck the chicken, then kill and eat it, technically.

Or kill it and then fuck it. But that's like you're a weirdo. Yeah. If you kill it and then fuck it, you're like some sort of necrophiliac. I wonder if that's a law, though. I have a joke about it. Have you heard the joke? No.

Well, there's a bit about you can kill an animal, but you're not allowed to fuck it. But what you can do is take a meal-sized portion and use it to jerk off with. If someone came into your house and you were jerking off with a chicken cutlet, you'd be like, what the fuck? I can't have my privacy? Yeah, exactly. Isn't that weird? It's my chicken.

Yeah. But as long as it's... No one would stop you. Look, okay. A fleshlight. What's a fleshlight? A fleshlight is something that resembles flesh that's made out of some sort of a rubber, whatever, epoxy.

I don't know what the fuck it's made out of. So you're... Polymer. You're putting your penis in that because it feels like flesh. Right. Well, how green would it be to take an actual chicken cutlet, use it to jerk off with, warm it up in a microwave so it feels like flesh, or let it sit at room temperature, whatever. You jerk off with it, and then you cook it and eat it. Yeah.

That's like you're making best use of all the materials. But that would be probably they couldn't do anything to you. But if you fucked a chicken, they could probably do something to you. Well, Jonathan Haidt, who is a guy who studies this, he wrote a book called The Happiness Hypothesis, talks exactly about this example. He said, if you masturbated, if you took a dead chicken and you ate it, it would be fine. If you took the dead chicken, fucked it, came in it, and then ate it, people would be like, oh! Yeah. He's another really difficult example.

What if you didn't cum? What if you're like a tantric guy? Good question. You put your penis in and you're like. That's how I fuck chickens. I draw the line in actually cumming in them. I cum on them. I cum on them.

You just get that tight in. It's deep. That's the weakest muscle I have. Everything else is really strong strong That hold back cum muscle My muscle's gotten better as I've gotten older It's like an old lady's underarm You know old ladies Underneath their arm just fucking dangles

There's no power to it It's got no strength Old ladies can't do dips Put like a weight belt on an old lady And tell her to do dips That's like how strong my cum muscle is. The dam breaks. Yeah, it just goes.

It's made of tissue paper. It's basically curtains. Yeah, it doesn't have any power to hold up. But Jonathan Haidt talks about fucking, like, he used that example, then he used another example, where he says, if a brother and sister in the woods use protection and have sex it's the same idea we immediately go oh that's wrong oh but he says okay it's wrong it is that's taboo in most cultures but again they're not having kids they had sex and nobody's getting hurt they're both you know they go on with their lives what is that why do we have this revulsion we have this built-in we as a society

as people universally have these very interesting through lines in culture one being that all cultures recognize all cultures no matter how primitive recognize uh humorous insults uh every culture no matter how primitive has a form of humorous insults for each other they make fun of each other uh the other is that every culture yes every culture that according to stephen pinker every culture they've ever studied 100 has has a place for humorous insult so making fun ribbing each other right uh and and you're talking about the most primitive tribes or the most aboriginal tribes and the most you know the most technical technologically advanced tribes all have always had some form of humorous insult the other is a recognition for certain things that are taboo yes but they're different across

the board culturally like we were talking about those cultures in new guinea the semen warriors in new guinea that have this crazy thing where they molest young boys widow strangling where they where the where of widows a woman's dies, the next man closest to the husband strangles her. But those are very, very isolated tribes that have not shared any ideas with other people. They had no cross-pollination. So you're going to get very weird, fetishistic of um examples of human behavior and that's also like when when you we know that like when people molest children that those children who have been molested often have this very distorted idea of sexuality and sometimes become abusers

themselves yeah and that this could have easily happened on these small islands. 100%. But these are large groups of people. Like thousands of people practice these New Guinea semen warrior rituals. It's still very small in relation. People need to read about this. Because, I mean, we're not going into depth about it. I mean, it's an incredible fucking bizarre thing. These New Guinea warriors, they take these young boys away from their mother at a very early age and they start having sex with them.

And they do it because they say that the boy needs semen in order to grow up strong and healthy. By ingesting semen, either through their mouth or through their butt. And, like, this is how they grow up. I mean, this is the semen warriors of New Guinea. Google it and freak the fuck out. New Guinea has, Jared Diamond did so many examples examples so many crazy examples of insane human behavior it's usually probably some lone pervert who's like let's fuck boys and now he's the leader but but you know they've got that's why they have cannibalism and all kinds of stuff but whenever you see a large population a civilization of

people who have been able to cross-pollinate ideas. So if you take huge areas, the Bantu Belt of Africa, the Fertile Crescent of North Africa and of the Middle East, China, for example, that's where taboos have strong sexual undercurrents, where certain sexual activity a lot of times is very taboo. And there's a lot of similarities you can draw with that, which is interesting. So there are through lines you can draw with cultures you do get those aberrations with those smaller groups

of people that just isolated people when you're talking about the new guinea people when we're on our trip about eating their dead bodies and the way they would oh my explain this insane fucking thing that they should do yeah well i still do i had jared diamond on the podcast and i said tell me about you've seen them cannibalized and he said you really want to know about it i said yeah i said well you asked for it and he said some tribes when they would have warring they'd have a war and they'd kill somebody they would eat they'd cook the problem chop it up cook cook the body but there are tribes in papua new guinea that will take the body, like if a relative dies, they'll take the body, they'll lay it out naked on slats of wood,

so there are slats, so there are holes, and they put buckets under the slats, and they let the body just putrefy and gel to the point where it starts to drip into the buckets. And then they take their sweet potatoes, and they dip their sweet potatoes into the human goo and they eat it. Oh, and here's the other problem. They – the reason a lot of – and life expectancy for most of them in the highlands was like 40 years old. Most died by violent deaths from interwar and from infection and things.

But they would also, when they would do that they would get uh what they called laughing disease kukuryu which is uh kreutzfeld jacobs kreutzfeld yeah what is that it's like mad cow disease essentially from eating you know brain and you know all that brain tissue yeah so don't eat people guys and don't let the body gel and putrefy at least cook and eat a filet if you're going to eat somebody eat the chest the ass in joe rogan's case he's got a set of cheeks on him. And you've got some big legs. I was looking at your legs. I think your legs have actually gotten bigger.

You had your pants off for a second near the campfire trying to dry your ass out. As we were talking, Joe's literally doing squats, hanging his wet ass over the fire. And I was like, looking at your legs, I was like, the kid's got a strong lower body. He looks like a A centaur Well I told you I did prepare for this Yeah I worked out for two months

Why didn't you tell me to prepare Cause you wouldn't listen I would listen I work out You barely I've been lifting heavy As you can tell You barely work out

Shut up I do not Look at my body I was I was doing a lot of Kettlebell squats Taking 270's Clean them

Get them here And just Yeah Set to 25. I didn't do that. That's a lot of work. You were making that noise? You gotta breathe out. I love when guys describe

their body. Bro, when I was lifting, dude, my chest was like... And my abs were like... Bro, my legs and ass were like... Isn't it amazing what a calming and morale-boosting thing having a fire was for us? Oh, God. We couldn't build a fire for the first, what, three days? Yeah.

And when we finally got that fire going... It was me and Mike. You led the charge. We had this idea. I was like, we're going to make a fucking fire. We have gasoline. We have whiskey. Tell them what the best kindling is in the world.

Fritos. Fritos. Fritos. Fritos, light on fire like we have gasoline we have whiskey tell them how we tell them what the best kindling is in the world fritos fritos fritos fritos light on fire like a motherfucker and hold their flame hold their flame like those candles that you can't blow out on a birthday cake while we were in where we were in camp i watched the documentary king corn i had it on my laptop it was one of the days where you couldn't go anywhere i just sat and watched this i was worried that my laptop was going to cook and explode because it was like in a sea of dew. Yeah. But my laptop is tough because it's been spilled on. So many times I've spilled coffee on it. It's tough with my laptop up.

But this fucking documentary is an amazing documentary. King Korn, if you've never seen it, if you're interested at all in like what the fuck is going on with Korn and how many things K corn is in in our country you got to watch this documentary these guys did an amazing job these two guys they got out of college they were doing some research on corn and they decided to uh get their their hair and their tissue uh analyzed and when they they analyzed it this guy said the carbon in your body is all from corn yeah we ingest so much you may you eat

so much corn that your body's made out of corn it's like what the fuck are you talking about so these guys they rented or leased uh an acre of land on this guy's property in iowa and they grew their own corn and grew it from the the time it went to the ground to adding pesticides to taking it to market they went through the whole thing and then explained all the different things that corn is in. And it is fucking stunning. It's in everything, right? It's also stunning how all of it is with subsidies. And if it wasn't for government subsidies, all these people would lose money.

These guys got a check from the government to grow their acre of corn. It was a small check because it was only one acre. to grow their acre of corn. It was a small check because it was only one acre. But if they're growing 10,000, 30,000 acres like a lot of these folks are, they rely on these government checks. Well, ethanol, which we don't really need anymore, but ethanol is used. And now there's a very strong lobbying presence in Washington that's not going to let ethanol go away.

Ethanol has a cottage industry around it. People make money off of growing corn for fuel. And there are a thousand examples of that. You know, where corn has a very strong lobby, the sugar lobby is very strong. There's another documentary called Fed Up about, you know, when the World Health Organization came along and said only 10% of your diet should be sugar of all kinds. Whether it's fruit juice or just sugar, it's just not good for your body. We have the science to prove it. And the sugar industry and the corn syrup industry came along and said,

well, if you want your, you know, put a lot of pressure on the Bush administration to tell them, to World Health Organization, if you want your $450 million this year, you better leave that out of your report. Because we have people believing in our school lunch programs and stuff that 25 of your diet can be simple sugars and you know it's i gotta watch that documentary because it's amazing how how many interests powerful interests get involved in getting you to eat corn getting you to eat foods that you know in their byproductss that they make a lot of money off

that may not be so good for your body. Yeah, it's bizarre. It's bizarre how bad it is for your body and how much of it is in foods. Corn syrup, corn starch, corn proteins, corn this, corn that. It's incredible, these corn additives. And without the subsidies, it wouldn't be happening. It's like our government is literally paying to keep our diets shitty. That's right.

Because they're in bed with this industry. And I'm really wondering what would happen if hemp became legal worldwide and especially legal in the United States. Because we sell hemp food. We sell those hemp protein bars that I brought with us on the trip. So good. Those Onnit hemp force protein bars and Onnit hemp force powder. But we have to buy our hemp from Canada, and there's a bunch of different grades of it. We buy the highest grade stuff.

It's very expensive. And one of the reasons why it's very expensive is it's hard to grow, and it's growing up in Canada. Well, it's hard to grow in America. It's impossible to grow, I should have said. It's not subsidized either. No, it's not subsidized. You have to get up in Canada. Well, it's hard to grow in America. It's impossible to grow, I should have said. It's not subsidized either. No, it's not subsidized. You have to get it in Canada.

And the hearts, the hemp hearts, the best part of it is what we get. And it's very high in protein. But that could be all over this country. And it's easy to fucking grow. It's not susceptible to various bugs and bullshit and weeds. It is a fucking weed. It grows crazy easy. And it's super healthy.

Is hemp a... It's in the marijuana family, right? This is what it is. It's the male version of the plant. The female version of the plant, yes, is where you get the THC. But they can grow, like, acres and acres of non-psychoactive hemp. Like, you don't even get you don't even test positive for thc if you eat hemp protein but if you eat poppy seed bagels

you test positive for heroin wow people that are going through drug tests like you you don't touch poppy seeds well you can't they tell you don't need poppy seeds for x amount of days damn because if you eat it you'll you turn up positive for heroin god yeah it's fucking crazy that's crazy it's really crazy and hemp is it has all the essential amino acids it's a far better source of paper it's far better building material have you ever seen a hemp stalk you ever pick up like a hemp stalk like hemp stalk okay you can make a rope out of it i know that oh yeah well you make the best rope, the best rope in the world. Parachutes.

George Senior, George Herbert Walker Bush, the parachute that he used to safely parachute in World War II, that was made out of hemp. He parachuted to safety with a fucking hemp parachute. Wow. There was a video called Hemp for Victory, where in World War II, they were, this is post-illegalization, by the way. They made it illegal in the 1930s. Well, in the 1940s, they were encouraging farmers to grow hemp for the war effort.

Like, pull up hemp. I believe that. Pull up the YouTube video. Did the nylon? Pull up the YouTube video, Hemp for Victory. It was part of it. DuPont was in cahoots, allegedly, with William Randolph Hearst. But William Randolph Hearst was the main reason why hemp became illegal. And a lot of it was because

he was going to have to convert all of his paper mills to hemp paper. Hemp paper is way better. Like, if you pick up regular paper, look at this, Hemp for Victory. Play the volume. This was a propaganda film that they made in the 1940s

to get people to start growing hemp for the war effort. Wow. Yeah, this is fucking crazy. When you think about it, this shit is illegal today. That's amazing. Those buildings are made of hemp, you guys. Just kidding. Hemp was already old in the service of

mankind. For thousands of years, even then, this plant had been grown for cordage and coarse cloth in China and elsewhere in the East. For centuries prior to about 1850, all the ships that sailed the western seas were rigged with hempen rope and sails. For the sailor, no less than the hangman, hemp was indispensable. Do you know canvas comes from the word cannabis? Canvas cloth, like canvas sails, those were all made out of hemp.

I just love their voices. Back then, they talked about things very formal. That was their version of the strip club DJ. That's right. Hemp was something, and there's always the music behind with some flute. Look at that. Those are hemp chords. Be a good American and buy hemp.

Even people in the east china and other where other places so what happened was in the 1930s they came out with this invention called a decorticator and the decorticator they used it to more effectively process the hemp fiber they before they used slavery slavery was the only way the way they would do it like smash these fibers down and it wasn't as effective as cotton and so they they came up with a cotton mill when uh eli whitney came up with a cotton wheel mill cotton gin when they started uh doing that like well cotton's way easier now so they started making things out of cotton but then they came out with a decorticated and like oh shit hemp is going to

be making a comeback and they were saying hemp is a new billion dollar crop like pull up the the cover of popular science magazine in uh 1930 i want to say 35 37 when i was the cover of popular science magazine said hemp the new billion dollar crop this is the cover of this magazine and then right after that it was made illegal and then dupont and those other interests came along um just pull up hemp the new billion dollar crop it was made illegal on the cover of the fucking magazine wow 1938 there it is wow hemp i was gonna use hemp clothes and hemp paper and hemp this and hemp food and hemp oils hemp oils are super good for your body and not psychoactive at all when you when you said eli whitney is the same kind of thing i was thinking about how one man's invention made slavery essentially it was a real abolition abolitionist movement going on where slavery was really the anti-slavery movement was

gaining tremendous ground because it was really hard to justify of course and then when eli whitney came along with the cotton gin and all those southern plantations were like we got all this free labor and and this is white gold we're selling this stuff not only to europe but to north africa everywhere everybody wants american cotton uh not so fast we're not getting rid of slavery here this makes no sense we got a lot of free labor and uh thank you eli whitney for you know i wonder i always wonder like you come up with this amazing invention and uh but that's going to keep a people enslaved for about another hundred years thank you very much it's just one of those weird things in history where you just go

well it played a part obviously um do you know how have you ever heard about this incredible historical story about morse how morse code was invented? No. This is so amazing. Morse was... Yeah. That's amazing shit. But Morse, but this is what's more amazing. Morse was a painter, a very successful oil painter. Very successful. And his wife, he got a tele...

He got a... Before Morse code, it's very important to remember that the only way to get a message to somebody throughout history, Alexander the Great and George Washington had to use the exact same methodology, which was horse, boat, or foot. A messenger pigeon, but in very small areas. What about crow?

No, I'm afraid... Send a raven. I'm afraid not a raven. That's in Game of Thrones. That's a lie. That's a lie? It's a lie. But no, no, no.

They sent a raven. I'm sorry, my friend. That's a lie. That's a lie? It's a lie. But no, no, no. They sent a raven. I'm sorry, my friend. That's a lie. It's got to be a messenger. Next thing you'll tell me the dragons aren't real. Well, have you ever seen

Here Be Dragons? They're really pretty girls' pussy. Yes, but crocodiles. That's true. That's what happened. Don't give it away. She's the mother of dragons.

That's amazing. I love that. I can't wait until that comes back. She's wonderful. She's the mother of dragons. Khaleesi. Khaleesi. What a good kid. comes back yeah she's wonderful she's the mother of dragons calise calise what a good kid calise hey she's a queen bro whatever hey don't your voice is getting all gravelly that's it that's my friend jimmy from back home jimmy detilio used to say that whenever a girl was like really perverted so new york would go

what a boston he would go what a good kid good she's a good kid jimmy burke does that jimmy burke used to always say that she's a good kid he used does that Jimmy Burke you saw I say that she's a good kid he's yeah that's very New York oh so it's an East Coast very so for perverts yeah well he I don't think you know my friend Jimmy was all Boston she's a good kid Ulysses H. Grant was the one who turned Yellowstone into a national park Theodore Roosevelt turned Yosemite okay Yosemite so so morse thank you to dj jackpot thank you dj so so so morse morse gets um a message your wife is sick in connecticut

he was in north northern new york or something he gets on a you know in a horse and buggy and he goes down and by the time he gets there he loved his wife she wasn't only dead she had been buried so he never got a chance to say bye to her he's heartbroken and all he does as this painter a painter is he obsesses over how in the world he can figure out he could figure out a way to not have that where he could get if he had gotten the message earlier he could have gotten there to see his wife wow seven years later he's on an ocean liner and he meets a dude who's a scientist who's working with electromagnetic fields. And he basically says, do you think it would be possible to use this electromagnetic field and get it somewhere else so that we can quicken time?

Long story short, he basically gets together with this guy who is a scientist on electromagnetic fields. They send a message, and i can't remember whether it was from new york to washington dc but i think it was but at first it was a short distance it was only like you know uh you know i don't know a quarter mile or something i don't know what are you looking it up right now washington and baltimore washington and baltimore and they sent a message in as much time as it takes electricity to get there it was instantaneous and it it it was of course a bigger revolution than even the internet some would argue because

before that time and throughout all of human history the only way to get a message to somebody was by foot boat or horse and it just had never been done before. It was a complete revolution. And it started because a guy was heartbroken over not being able to say goodbye to his wife before she died. That's incredible. Yeah.

That is fucking incredible. That's why I love history. Well, it's fascinating when you think that there was people a long time ago that if something was going on 10 miles away, there's no way of finding out i know no way i know now if there's a revolution going on in china right now in hong kong yeah we're watching it live in real time there's streaming websites you know there's there's criticism of the way

china's handling it you get to read various different points of view yeah i mean it's an oppressive oppressive regimes aren't allowed to get away with murder if they can but they have to be very careful because they know the world's watching it makes the world less brutal i would argue oh way more yeah way way more accountable way more what the world would have done if the mongols were coming in the middle east and just killing people wholesale in russia the way they did think about what the world would be doing we'd be like we got to stop these assholes on horseback right now. Yeah. You know? But nobody was watching. We didn't know. That's where you've got to love something called America.

Okay? Because we'll just send some drones over there. Oh, you've got a 160-pound bow and you like to drink horse blood mixed with mare's milk? I'm in Nevada sipping coffee. Watch this. I'm in an Xbox drinking Mountain Dew and a fucking kid with a hemorrhoid is lighting you bitches up from the sky. Big thumb muscles.

Could you imagine if you could do that? I mean, if time travel becomes reality, where you can't mess up the timeline. Like, say if all timelines are completely independent. Say, if you could go back in time, and you could have have at it and do whatever the fuck you want it would have no bearing on the future if they find out the timelines are completely independent and that if you do go back in time it has literally no effect on the current future right you go back to where you were and nothing's changed you even your your actual actions never really took place they took place in an alternative timeline how much would you love to fucking suit up with some, like, Navy SEAL-type bulletproof armor,

lock yourself down in a fucking giant tank, and go roll into the Mongol Empire? One person. Say, you know what? I win. I'm just taking over. I think about that every single day. And I'm not kidding. I think about a helicopter gunship while these a-holes are on their horses coming in and try to kill and rape and do all that.

And be like, hey, guess what? Check out this bird from the sky. I look like a giant hornet. Tell me if this stings. G-g-g-g-g-g-g-g. Now, think about this. What will people from a thousand years from now be thinking about us? And how ridiculous would they think that we are?

Listen to what these assholes did. They made explosions in little metal containers. Yeah. And these explosions propelled these very dense metal balls through the air at ridiculous speeds. And they went through each other's bodies. Yeah. And that's how they did war. They couldn't read minds.

They didn't understand enlightenment. And they were also human. They didn't have the enlightenment pills yet. They didn't know how to have perfect genetics. They didn't know how to engineer cancer away. They didn't know how to engineer cancer away. They were all fighting over resources. They got cold. They had electricity that was coming from, wait for it, nuclear power, these fucking idiots.

They had developed these nuclear sites where they had these generators that they could never shut off. And they kept them running. And when they would have, anything would go wrong and the power would go out, it would melt down, and they would have to clear everyone out of the area for 100,000 years. Not only that, you had to be tied to a power source. You literally had to have a long rope coming out of your head that was attached to some huge box just to hear yourself or other people. Everything was plugged in. Well, how about solar power in California? Why isn't everything solar-powered?

I don't know we don't have any fucking rain. I mean is the one resource that we have that's Bountiful and plentiful is sunlight. We have a real problem. We've rained once in a year here It's crazy. We have a real problem, but we have massive massive amounts of solar electricity that no one's tapping into. And we got a fucking ocean that we could just desalinate. Why haven't they figured out how to do that? They say, well, it takes an incredible amount of power. What about fucking solar power?

How about use solar power, figure out an efficient way of using solar power to process the salt out of the water, and we have the most green, lush landscape ever. I think it's really... I don't know if we, lush landscape ever. I think it's really, I don't know if we have the technology yet. I think it's really hard to do that. Work on it!

Get to work on it. A fucking guy named Morse figured out a way to send signals back when there was no internet. Come on, inventors! No, did they even have cars?

No. No cars. No. No, do they have phones? No! There was no fucking phones! They had trains. I think they had

the internal, no, maybe not. Trains worked on coal. If you had a book and you spit on the pages, all the fucking information would run down and leak. Think about it. I know. They were fools.

Well, books had to be hand-woven. But the printing press was another revolution. I mean, Gutenberg, he was a watchmaker. I know. And it was just the printing press was another... When you talk about the seminal people in history the people that changed everything he's in there when was the printing press invented i used to know the answer to this uh in in the it might have been actually in the

beginning of the 1800s or maybe even earlier than that let me like i think 17 it was like the 17 the actual printing press was probably invented i believe in 17 well why ask why did jamie i'm looking i'm just trying to guess i can't remember my guess but if by the time it actually took hold it was a while it was about 100 years it's amazing to think that back before then like people had to write out all the letters yeah i think it's 1600 1640 if you get like an old book it was earlier than 1640 well martin luther what didn't wasn't that one of the reasons why martin luther was able to spread his propaganda so far because he was printing things and putting them on the the walls of

churches well he he did no he he did his i think it was bittenberg he did he did his hundred proclamations and he nailed it to the church door and that was basically saying that the Catholic church was a sham or at least they didn't need all this money and it was corrupt and if you want the word of God all you need is the Bible you don't need all this elaborate it was actually more than that

he actually phonetically translated the Bible for the first time for the common folk so regular people could read the Bible that wasn't Martin Luther's contribution the Bible for the first time for the common folk so regular people could read the Bible. That wasn't actually Martin Luther's contribution. Martin Luther's contribution was to say he was a Jesuit priest, I believe, who said that you can be just as holy as the Pope as a common man if you are religious and you follow the Bible.

You don't need this huge infrastructure and hierarchy of bishops and priests. He did something with translating the Bible. I know this for sure. When was it? What is it? What year was it? 1450. Wow.

1450. That's incredible. Yeah. But it didn't really take hold. The printing press wasn't used until 100, 200 years later. I mean, on a wide scale. The projects, yeah. The Luther Bible, a German language Bible translation from the Hebrew and ancient Greek hundred years later i mean on a wide scale the projects yeah martin the luther bible a german

language bible translation from the hebrew and ancient greek by martin luther yeah it was uh so the new testament was first published in 1522 and the complete bible containing the old and new testaments was 1534 and the project absorbed luther's later years thanks to then recently invented printing press the result was a widely disseminated and uh contributed significantly to development of today's modern high german language and so what had happened was when luther this is all from there's a um the reason why i know it is because of Dan Carlin's Hardcore History podcast on it. I don't remember the exact episode. I'll try to recall it.

But it's amazing, this episode on Martin Luther and how Luther had created this movement, and this movement had actually gone far and beyond his ideas and gotten like completely totally radical which was what which was essentially the proletariat can be just as holy as somebody with cloth and a crown i mean in other words it was it was kind of a it was kind of the democratization of christianity right i mean all you needed was a bible and to walk and to live the word of god and you could be you were going to heaven too you didn't need a church yeah in order... That was real heresy to say that you as a farmer, if you follow the word of God, can be even less corrupt and be in more favor with God than even the Pope.

That was pretty radical. I think he had to leave Germany for it. Well, I don't remember exactly, specifically, what the events were, but his take on it, Dan Carlin's take on it, I think, goddammit, I'm going to find it here. But didn't his teaching spark the Hundred Years' War? I mean, the Catholics and the Protestants, those vicious wars.

Thor's Angels is the name of the podcast. You got to listen to it because it is fucking absolutely, completely stunning. He's a fucking amazing guy, man, Dan Carlin. His podcasts are amazing. And his take on it is so enthralling. He's so good at being theatrical and dragging you into it and explaining it all. But he explains all the personalities that were involved and all the conflicts that were involved. But it was essentially the first time where the public had gotten a hold of what it really

said in the Bible. Because before, you couldn't read the Bible. It was read to you. Yeah, it was read to you. So they had to rely on other people. And it was read a lot of times in Latin. And a lot of people didn't even speak Latin. They would just go to church and listen to the priest speak.

Well, still to this day. You go to the church, you hear those people. Priests also would give you, you would do things for the priest, and they would grant you, what are the words, I can't remember the word for it,

but you'd basically get points in favor of going to heaven. That's what it used to look like. It used to look like it when it was handwritten. Amazing. How about that, what Steve Rinella was saying

about all the buffalo? Yeah, well, that's Dan Flores, buffalo diplomacy and bison diplomacy. He's a guy, I'm going to try to get him on the podcast. I'm getting his information from Rinella. But what he essentially is saying is that our idea is that the white man came and killed all the buffalo. There were millions of buffalo. all the Buffalo there were millions of Buffalo and then also the there's a commonly held misconception that people gave smallpox to the Native Americans on

purpose and that what really happened was smallpox they didn't even know what the fuck smallpox was and the French had given it to the Native Americans accidentally because they had it it It spread through the Native Americans. And the Spanish, too, I think. Yes. And killed a huge amount of people. They say 90% of the population. 90% of the people.

So when that happened, the buffalo just grew out of control. And what he talked about is how the early settlers, the early Europeans, they documented all these different things that they had seen. All the deer, elk, all the different animals they see. They didn't talk about buffalo. They didn't document it. But then, hundreds of years later, after the Native American population had dwindled substantially, 90% of them had died off because of smallpox, the buffalo were out of fucking control.

And he also talked about how the introduction of the horse changed the way they were hunting because the the horse even preceded a lot of european settlers because of the horse over exactly they brought the horse over during their cortez days yes and that's why cortez had no they thought that's what spread influenza through the mississippi delta and all those different diseases that that native americans had never been exposed to. Because when they came back, they saw these towns that were empty. And it was like, where are all the people? Well, they died off. And what Dan Flohr is apparently saying, I'm going to try to get him on soon,

is that the Native Americans, just with the horse and the firearm, were on their way to eradicating the buffalo. Or extirpating. Meaning, you know, and local local extinctions and that because they stopped farming right they would they would they would follow the buffalo became nomadic exactly because there's they're fucking two thousand pound animal that just stand still yeah i mean yeah and they had guns and they were on horses so they could ride as fast as the buffalo could run get up to them delicious yeah and it's like shooting a house. So what had happened was when the Western people came and killed millions of buffaloes

and stacked them on top of each other. The reason why there were so many buffalo in the first place is they had gotten widely out of control, wildly out of control because so many Native Americans had died. Really, I mean, we're doing a really bad job of explaining this, Really, I mean, we're doing a really bad job of explaining this, but apparently this guy, Dan Flores, has some really interesting information and a deep, deep base of knowledge on this subject and all sorts of historical points of reference that he can point to that explains why these animals had died off and what was going on.

But it's amazing when you think that this country, like, you're talking about the very earliest European settlers, 1400s, 1500s. That's nothing. No, it's nothing. It's a blink of an eye. It's 500 years ago. I also think it's very patronizing to suggest that the Native Americans weren't exactly like white people in a lot of ways in terms of

just they they would they of course they would hunt things to expert interpretation i mean uh they didn't know any better right i mean these human beings like they're gonna go in that kind of rugged terrain you're gonna you're gonna follow buffalo if it's that easy and if you kill them you'll go to the next herd come on but i also do think that the way they were living by taking everything from this animal utilizing every piece of the animal utilizing the bones utilizing the better stories of the earth yes sure without a doubt yeah and they were more engaged in the whole relationship that they had to these animals that they were killing and eating well i think our legacy if we're not careful you know our modern

man i'm talking about our legacy in 2014 if we not careful, our legacy may very well be that we destroyed this earth, you know, I mean, or made it a lot worse. And that's really hard to stop with the onslaught of technology and all the, you know, just the growth of our population and how many resources we need and the byproducts and the wastes. But that's a huge challenge, man. And I don't know the answer to how you stop it but yeah it's interesting man it's it's really it's science is the answer though science is is probably the way we're going to figure out yeah not probably i think it's the only way out taking carbon out of the atmosphere growing food with less water and less space all that stuff oh somebody corrected me. The Dan Carlin episode is the Prophets of Doom.

That's the one that's on, thanks to TESP from the, shout out to TESP. I'm going to write that down. Prophets of Doom. On the Rogan board. That's the Dan Carlin episode. But yeah, I'm a really big optimist. I mean, I'm always hoping that we're going to get our shit together. Always. big optimist. I mean, I'm always hoping that we're going to get our shit together, always, but whether or not

science is the answer or whether or not Ebola fixes the problem or a super volcano, we have to start all over again like the Sumatra volcano. I know, but can you imagine

if we had to start over? I was thinking about that. I was like, no, we're getting so close to doing some cool stuff, man. but what is cool stuff for who? It's cool stuff for you.

You're not going to be here to see it. Cool stuff for your kids. I mean, our role is very strange our role is very strange because we're a piece of a puzzle that likes to pretend that we're the thing where we're not we're a we're a grain of sand not even yes but i do think that what i think about is that what gives us meaning is all of us no no matter most of us at least, unless you're a crazy person, but all of us are always working. Like even like Dawkins and people who are sort of nihilists,

people who say, well, you know, we're a grain of sand and none of this means anything. It's all meaningless. If that were the case, they are still writing books to tell us how meaningless it is. Everybody is very busy

working very hard at their own expression and i think it's because and we were talking about this some people like you know they want to score social brownie points but for the most part human beings work very hard to try to at least influence for the better the people that we love the people we're connected to the people that we Well, we're trying to make things better for ourselves, but the reality is... And people that we love, though. Our sun is going to burn out. Our planet is going to no longer be able to support life. Everything is temporary.

It's just the timeline is enormous. It's like, does it have meaning? Sure, it has meaning currently, but that's what we need to concern ourselves with. What holds meaning to you and the people that you love? Those things are important. But the reality of life on this planet is first of all the reality of human beings you know we're joking around about one of my ancestors fucking a monkey but the reality is we are going if if human beings stay alive okay if civilization continues to innovate and we continue to get to this this insane progression of technology that we're

currently involved in that keeps growing and keeps happening we will laugh at how goofy and ape like we were in 2014 in our search for me primitive machinery which is our original biology well it's already becoming obsolete right sort of i mean at the very least it's it's it's it's outdated and it's great because i said we'll look at our bodies the way we look at a cell from from the 80s as you're able to like mesh your body with machines and you become more efficient in everything from holding your breath for an hour underwater or red blood cells to keep you warm or whatever it might be technology tissue regeneration nanotechnologyotechnology, robotics,

and biocompatible machinery like that is going to change our very biology. Well, which leads to a whole new set of problems. At a certain point in time, will we even be a person anymore? And will we even be what we consider a carbon-based life form anymore? Right. Exactly. Because we're inventing synthetic biology. And let's take it a step further. As you're able to download memory,

if you're able to download memory, if you're able to download what goes on in our brains... I've seen people criticize him. I've seen people criticize his ideas saying those things won't be possible. But I think what they're missing is that we can replicate it

without even totally understanding its processes like the the the thing is like we don't understand all the complex processes of uh of you know utilizing proteins and this and that and how many steps and phases it takes to create a human being but they could recreate what it is to be a human being without all those processes if they have a different mechanism so instead of a biological mechanism of cells and proteins and vitamins and nutrients and you know neurotransmitters and all the different things that grow into being a person if it's silicon based if it's some sort of computer-based system that emulates all of the processes of being a human being. And does it better, maybe.

Yeah, very possible. Yeah. Very possible. Yeah. I mean, look at that dude, that guy that shot his wife in South Africa, the Blade Runner dude. Pistorius. Yeah. Oscar Pistorius.

That motherfucker with those stupid blades was running way faster, probably, than he could have without them. Yeah, that's right's right well and the other thing is that we learn more about the brain like it really throws in the question like you people talk about having out-of-body experiences well what they found is they can they can manipulate they can touch parts of the brain that give people out-of-body experiences where they feel like they're watching everything from their body which is fascinating to me because that was always sort of the idea. I'm looking down as I was dying. I could see myself and all that.

Well, it may be that there's a chemical thing going on in the brain where you can actually manipulate that and replicate that process. Well, not even maybe. Well, here's the other thing. We know about dreams. Dreams are a very real thing. Everyone, I think everyone, most people have dreams. Dream.

Yeah. So what is a dream? A dream is an illusion. It's not really happening. What's something you're imagining, something really intricate and detailed. I had some fucking crazy dreams when we were sleeping in tents in Alaska. Really bizarre dreams. So when you're talking about near-death experiences, the people are

unconscious when they're having these. Like, oh, there's so much deep meaning to it. Really? Well, I was on a skateboard. I was getting chased by Godzilla in a dream. Is there deep meaning in that? Yeah. Because both of them are illusions. You weren't really flying above your body, okay? And I wasn't really getting chased by Godzilla. They

both probably seemed equally real. And the idea of a dream in and of itself is a very fucking strange thing you shut your brain off every night you close your eyes and your mind starts a process that we don't totally understand we know there's a bunch of things happening like rem sleep rapid eye movement we know now that there's neurotransmitters that are moving in and out of the brain and fucking around with your consciousness while you're out and we know what processes are shutting down and turning off but we don't totally understand what dreaming is we don't understand it we really don't understand why we even need it it's amazing

it's incredible. So when someone talks about having a near-death experience, like, yeah, maybe you're fucking dreaming. Yeah. Like, I don't know. I don't know what happened. You don't either. I know.

It changed me so much. But I think eventually we'll figure it out. That's for sure. At least be able to replicate dreams or have, you know. Perhaps. Maybe we'll transcend before we figure it out. I mean, we might abandon the body before we even totally understand its processes it really throws into turmoil the people who have strict orthodox religious beliefs too i mean they're already fucked yeah they're already fucked you know i

was watching this video before you got here richard dawkins arguing with his islamic people and this guy was talking about how moral islam is and how it's important and ethics and this and that and dawkins just kept hammering this dude. He said, what is the price that you must pay if you abandon Islam? And the guy didn't want to answer it. The guy didn't want to answer it. And then he went back to it. What is it?

Apostrophe? Apostate. Apostate. But what's the actual expression of leaving? You don't say, I committed apostate. If you leave, you're an apostate apostrophe so i don't know whatever it is what's the what what is what is you're an apostate if you leave right but what's the what is it like you know like perjury you know yeah if you per

i don't know perjure yourself it's called perjury whatever apostrophe i think it's called but anyway the guy wouldn't answer he didn't want to answer he was trying to skirt around it and dawkins kept hammering him. Finally, he goes, it's the death penalty. He goes, well, there you go. You leave Islam, and you have to be killed. That's in your religion. Do you understand that that's fucking crazy?

Like, that's the death penalty. And the guy was just, like, stammering. He was just stuck there. Because that is the reality. Not only that, islamic countries some insane number like in the 90 percentile believe that you should be stoned to death for adultery well but but i have to just having lived there for a long time i do have to come to the defense of the fact that that those just like with with the book of deuteronomy and judaism which says exactly the same thing by by the way. Most Muslims...

It says if you leave Christianity, you get killed? No, in the book of Deuteronomy, I mean, a lot of those laws come from the Old Testament. Remember, the Quran was very heavily influenced by the Old Testament. The Quran, in many ways, is a rebuttal to the New Testament, saying that Jesus Christ is not God. But most of the Ten Commandments and things are held as Quranic laws well, okay? So, so, so... Right, but it doesn't... But those things come from the old Jewish law.

But where does it ever say that if you leave Christianity, you're supposed to be killed? It doesn't. I'm talking about... I'm just saying that Islam got that from Judaism, okay? That's what I'm saying. And so... But the point I was making is that... I don't understand that.

How are you saying... Most Muslims in... I would guarantee, I i promise you don't believe that adultery that you should stone a woman to death most muslims aren't even that religious and there's this misconception and also islam is very very the the religion if you look at the difference between indonesian muslims for example and wahhabi muslims who are in saudi arabia it's vastly different because the way they interpret the quran the quran is can be interpreted it's the most easily and widely interpreted religion

as well leaves very very very open for interpretation so so and that's what islamic scholars will always tell you in and most muslims don't hold that point of view right but isn't that like saying that most Christians believe in evolution? I mean, it's like, what is the religion based on if you start deviating from it and adding in a bunch of your own thoughts and then just sort of ignoring the old stuff?

Like Old Testament stuff. People do that with religion and all that stuff. They do. But does that matter? Because a bunch of people still do that, isn't the heart of it still ridiculous? I think that Dawkins, though, might be harping on one aspect of Islam when you can also look at the other. He was talking in broad terms,

but he wanted to pick one very important point. Like when people were talking about it being a religion of peace, he was saying, really, well, how come if you leave you're supposed to be killed? That's not peaceful. And that's a very good point and a very good question, and an important question to ask.

I also think that there is also value in Islam to a lot of Muslims because it is a blueprint for how to live their lives and it works for them. For example, be charitable to people. Charity is a very big part of Islam. You know, there are a lot of examples of that. Modesty, charity, and things like that. It's when people take, interpret these things literally, i.e. fundamentally, or if they take it as symbology, as a suggestion of how to live your life. Just like you could be a Christian fundamentalist,

and you're going to be a very different person than if you are a regular Christian who takes this symbolism. Jamie, pull up, just Google not radical Islam, and then pull up a video. Pull up videos from not radical Islam on Google. And it's the very first video. It's called It's Not the Radical. It's Islam. When, I don't know what the word is, S-H-A-Y-K-H, what's that word? I don't know how you say it, but anyway, this guy is being interviewed, this guy is communicating

with this group of people, and they're all these other Islamics, or other Muslims, and he's talking about how people are confused about what radical Islam is and what's just actual Islam, and what the law is, and what you're supposed to do. Watch this video. How they always attack the Muslims, or Islam in particular, for some certain things, for example, about gays. Put your headphones on.

They always attack us and the teachings towards this matter, for example. While in Christianity and in Judaism, it's the same punishment that exists. It's haram. So why they're always, for example, focusing on Islam and not Judaism or Christianity, while, for example, focusing on Islam and not Judaism or Christianity, while, for example, also in Jerusalem, for those who have been to Jerusalem and the buses in Jerusalem, for example, women sit separate than men, for example.

So why, like five minutes ago or early, we were asked about why Muslims have to be sitting separate, you know, men and women. But they never ask these questions to Jews or Christians, why specifically Muslims or Islam. يجب أن يكون للمسلمين مجموعة من الأشخاص الذين يسكنون لكنهم لم يسألوا هذه الأسئلة للمسلمين أو المسلمين لم تجدوا هذه الأسئلة يوميا؟ وقلت أنك تحتاج إلى أن تسأل المجموعة نعم، نعم، هذا صحيح لكنه يحتاج إلى أن يجدوا الأسئلة لم يكن هنا يوميا لكن الناس الأخرين كانوا هنا يعني أن الس الآخرين سيشعرون بسببك؟

الإجابة بسيطة جداً الإسلام هو الحقيقة والعلم والجديد ليس الحقيقة سأتحدث عن هذا الموضوع هل يمكنني يا شيخ؟ أنت الشيخ أنت الدكتور نعم You are the sheikh. Yes, but you are the sheikh. You are the doctor. MashaAllah. Can we have the camera, can we have this camera focusing on all the audience here?

Can we have this camera focusing on all the audience? Because every now and then, every time we have a conference, every time we invite a speaker, they always come with the same accusations. This speaker supports death penalty for homosexuals. This speaker supports death penalty for this crime or this crime or that he is homophobic. They subjugate women, etc., etc etc etc. It's the same old stuff coming all the time. And we always try to tell them, I always try to tell them that look it's not that speaker that we are inviting who has these extreme radical views as you say. These are general views

that every Muslim actually has. Every Muslim believes in these things. Just because they're not telling you about it or just because they're not out there in the media doesn't mean they don't believe in them. So I will ask you, everyone in the room, how many of you are normal Muslims?

You're not extremist, you're not radical, just normal Sunni Muslims. Please raise your hands. Everybody, mashallah, subhanallah. Okay, take down your hands again. How many of you agree that men and women should sit separate? Please raise your hands. All of them raise their hands. Yeah, but...

Hold on. Everyone agree. Everyone agree. Brothers and sisters. Subhanallah. So it's not just these radical sheikhs then. Allahu Akbar. Next question How many of you agree That the punishments

Described in the Quran and the Sunnah Whether it is death Whether it is stoning for adultery Whatever it is If it is from Allah and his messenger That is the best punishment ever possible For humankind And that is what we should

apply in the world. Who agrees with that? And they all raise their hand. Allahu Akbar. Are you all the radical extremists? Subhanallah. So all of you are saying that you are common Muslims, you all go to the different masajis in Norway, or is it, are you like a specific sect, like the Islam, that sect or anything like that, are you like that?

No. Are you like that? Please raise your hand if you're like this extreme Islam, that sect or anything like that. No one. Allahu Akbar. How many of you just go to this normal masajids in Norway? The normal Sunni mosques.

Please raise your hands. All of them raise their hands. Allahu Akbar. God is great. So what's the politicians going to say now? What's the media going to say now? That we're all extremists? We're all radicals?

We need to deport all of us from this country? Subhanallah Allahu Akbar Takbir Takbir Takbir May we have the next question please Isn't that fascinating? I don't like those kind of videos

to be honest with you because I happen to think that if you took a cross section of people from all over the Muslim world, you'd find very different points of view. You'd find people who were way more liberal than that guy. And I think it's because people are living their lives. They don't even have time to go to mosque. Just like you see with Christians, just like you see with Jews, there's a great deal of debate. I think the problem with the Muslim world today is most moderate Muslims, and that's most, are just silent.

Okay, but what does that mean, though? What it means is what it means that— What he's saying on stage when he's asking, are you regular Muslims? And if you are regular Muslims, raise your hand. They raise their hand. If you believe that the message that's in the Quran is the correct way to handle any situation, raise your hand. If you believe that it's the way to handle adultery, raise your hand. And they're all raising their hand.

Those are real people. They're not real people. I don't know who those people are. I don't know where that is. What does that mean? I don't know who those people are. I don't know where that is. I don't know what the context is.

I mean, I don't think that's a good example. But how can you say they're not real people? Because a room full of people like that in that clip is not necessarily a good representation of most Muslims. It just isn't. I think there are problems with Islam like any other religion. I think there are problems with certain populations of Muslims who have been isolated. There might be a lot of ignorance in certain parts of the world, like the Middle East, where there isn't a lot of money or exposure to other ideas yes but i i think that that is that is very anti-islamic and very slanted in its own way wait a minute

what is just just taking a not i'm not saying you are i'm saying when you if you took that and you look at one video and decide that's how muslims think in general i think it's a mistake well first of all this video is a pro-Islam site that put this video up. This video was put up by Islam.net video, Islam.net, and what they're trying to tell you is that these ideas that people are calling radical Islam are not radical. They are just Islamic ideas. This is not like a propaganda video. No, no, I've read the Quran.

They are. But what I'm saying is this not like a propaganda video. No, I've read the Quran. They are. But what I'm saying is this is not a propaganda video. This is a pro-Islamic website that's putting these videos out. I understand. All I'm saying is that that, to me, that video, to me, leaves non-Muslims with the impression that all Muslims are extreme. And what I'm saying is I don't believe that they are. I mean, this country, a Christian country for all intents and purposes, puts a great number of people to death and we have a lot of people on death row for crimes, especially for murder, right? Wait a minute, wait a minute. But this state is a secular thing. It's not done because

of religion. When you put people in jail or kill them because of murder, you're not doing it because it's in the Bible. But our justice system is very much based on the notion that everybody's of the same moral worth, which is a Christian idea. Yeah, but because it's a Christian idea, it's not based on the Christian faith, meaning

you have to be a Christian to ascribe to it. These ideas are very, this is very different. No one's saying that God says that we should kill people for adultery, so we have to kill people Christian to ascribe to it. These ideas are very, this is very different. No one's saying that God says that we should kill people for adultery, so we have to kill people for adultery in this country. We're talking about crimes against other human beings. That's the reason why people are killed in this country.

I mean, when you're killing someone in Texas for murder, you're not doing it because it's a crime against God. What you're seeing in that video is a religion. You're seeing a representation of a religion. Are there more moderate representations of that religion? Unquestionably, there certainly are. But at what point in time, what is the religion then? I mean, if it becomes more moderate and if you don't ascribe to certain things that are in this

ancient text that tell you there's very clear laws and rules that you're supposed to abide by, what is the religion then what is a religion at all if you just decide well we're going to morph it because it's 2014 and we think that the new evidence shows that homosexuals are actually born and it's not their fault it's just a part of genetics and it's part of life itself it's like having red hair or a big nose you some people are gay well that's a that's a really really good question and i think that i think in my opinion i think you can you could identify as a christian as a muslim as a as a jew and not hold all the tenets of that particular religion why then what is a but are you just a human that just accepts you you pull and choose and yeah people do it all the time right but what is that then

how are you a christian you you're not subscribing to the full ideology you're you're not a fundamentalist yeah but what are you then you're you're you're a believer who believes in the in not in the letter of the law but rather in the symbol in the idea in the suggestion and the idea that we can reach to be as good as we can be and that some laws that were written 1400 years ago in this case or whatever, I think that's how long it was, are outdated because science, etc. is starting to show us that a lot of those laws do not hold relevance in our everyday lives and in fact are probably unethical or immoral. But isn't that completely fascinating when you look at all these different countries that do believe that if you leave Islam, you're a dead person. You should be killed. If you commit adultery, you're a dead person. You

should be killed. I mean, there's a bunch of different things. If you're homosexual, you should be killed with rocks. Very important questions to ask and very important for the Muslim world to debate. And they're going through that debate right now, just like Judaism and Christianity went through that debate. I mean, how many people were burned to the stake in the name of, you know, witchcraft in Salem and all over Europe for that matter because they were not what? Good Christians. Yeah. You know, so I think this is a product of a religion under, you know, I think actually

that these debates and the questions you're asking, which are also being asked in the Muslim world, are crucial because it's how a religion, you know, it's the process a religion must go through and contend with. It's got to. Favor or oppose making Sharia the law of the land. This is the percentage of Muslims who favor making Islamic law the official law in their country. Ready for this? Afghanistan, 99%. Pakistan, 84%. Bangladesh, 82%.

Iraq, 91%. Palestine, 89%. Morocco, 83%. I mean, these are crazy numbers. Niger in sub-Saharan Africa, 86%. A lot of those countries, I would imagine, are also very poor, and I don't know how they're polling, but I think a lot of those countries, when you've got nothing, you turn to religion. Absolutely.

And the way you solve that problem is with commerce. Yeah, right? It is a scary thought, though, that we're in this part of the world, and there's a giant chunk of human beings that have these ideals. I mean, these are ideas that are incredibly common in giant chunks of the world, millions of people. And when you're talking about what a religion is, and there's so many moderates, well, what is this religion then? I mean, if there are moderates who don't believe that you should be stoned to death, who don't believe that you should be killed if you leave, who don't believe you should be killed with rocks if you're an adulterer. What is that religion then?

I mean, at what point in time does it sort of dwindle off? Does it go away? Does it get replaced? Well, Iraq is a good example. Like, that statistic is very surprising to me, and I'm not sure I believe it, because Iraq was, remember, it was basically under Saddam Hussein. You weren't really allowed to even bring a Quran to school or to a public place. It was, you know, the Shia are a little bit more religious in some ways than the Sunni,

although that's a big, actually with ISIS, they believe in Wahhab and Wahhabism and stuff. But I think that, you know, Iraq, from what I understand, was essentially, they were Baathists, which was, the idea was that you were secular. That all Arabs should band together and there should be sort of this belt of Arab unity, which was what Nasser was trying to do in Egypt, etc., etc. Unify the Arabs under one sort of, but Saddam Hussein was very sort of, until until later on was very anti-islam in a lot of ways yeah well that was a secular nation it was a secular nation before we invaded it and now it's a civil war between two varying sects of islam yeah it's it just to me i think that ideologies are very dangerous and rigid ideologies that are thousands of years old are the most dangerous 100 speaking of seventh heaven oh boy there's a show that brian used to be on um a religious show right i mean i i have to

pee because i want to talk about this yeah please this is very important go ahead go go do your little squirt and we'll we'll talk about this because uh this is fucking really spooky stuff um there was a show called seventh heaven and uh brian was on it um he uh i don't remember the exact nature of the show but it had something to do with religion um so anyway this guy whose name is stephen collins uh he played a pastor on this show seventh heaven he confessed to his estranged wife that he was a child molester. And it's all on tape, apparently. She recorded, they were having meetings with a counselor. And she recorded him talking to this therapist. And she was asking him all these questions about these incidents and he was very specific about the answers and she taped the therapy session and apparently it's legal to

secretly record a conversation because in california you're allowed to secretly record conversations to gather evidence that the other person committed a violent felony and Molesting a child under the age of 14 is considered a violent felony. This is amazing stuff they there was a he confessed to molesting an 11 year old girl a relative of his first wife That's so sick man he i mean he's talking in in in great detail about these things uh he he did it a few times to this one girl when she was 11 12 or or 13 and um this guy i mean he was playing a pastor it's just i it's it's really sick stuff well what's what's crazy is that i i have on my acting reel there's a scene with him and i doing this

scene's one of the best scenes i ever did and it's really weird because i knew him really well i know him very well and you know usually when well. And, you know, usually when you read about this, you go, well, that guy, that guy's, that guy should be put in jail right away and all that stuff. And it's an interesting thing because I've been thinking about it. Like, I feel like, and I want to be careful how I say this because I know him well. I feel like this is a, this is a, a guy who's a good guy with a sickness, a like a compulsion and a sickness so when you say good guy i i think that i think that i don't know man i i'm i just i find myself shaking my head and scratching my head but i know steven well and i think i think it's possible is it possible that

you are you you mean good to everybody your fellow, yet you have a compulsion and a sickness that you don't know what to do about? And this article that I was reading to you about, we were on the plane, and there was an article in the New York Times written about pedophilia and how a lot of pedophiles have these urges. They don't act on them. They live in fear. They have no control sometimes. And this woman was saying, if those people, because all of us want to punish somebody like that, right? The minute we see that guy, I have a daughter, you have a daughter. It's like, I don't want that guy on the street. I don't

want that guy near kids. We understand that. And we all go, we got to get that guy in jail. But there's a bigger question to say, and that is this. If you have these feelings, you're a pedophile and you have these feelings. You just have these urges. If you have these feelings, you're a pedophile and you have these feelings. You just have these urges. Shouldn't there be somewhere for these people to go where they can say, I'm having these feelings. I need help because I feel like I'm going to touch a child. That seems to be creating a place for those people to go and somehow seek help, I feel, is more if they if they don't have anywhere to go for help and they know if they go anywhere they're going to lose their job they're going

to lose their life and everything else they're not going to go anywhere they're going to touch a kid so the the end results here is we got to figure out a way so less kids get you know molested right right it raises a very difficult debate and, which is if this is indeed a sickness. And there's a lot of evidence that maybe it is even neurological. Like there's an overwhelming number of pedophiles that are left-handed, an overwhelming number of pedophiles that have trouble with spatial relationships. Yeah, this was in the New York Times article that you were reading on the plane yesterday. Yes. Which is so fascinating this came out today.

Yeah. And then here's this friend of mine who i really really like i mean he's a he's just funny and and does a lot of work for charity he's got kids of his own well apparently it wasn't just one instance no the the lapd is reopening an investigation from 2012 where his uh a niece of a neighbor yeah and he went accusing him i guess he admitted it to his wife and then he went to counseling well i talked about it while you went in the bathroom and it was all recorded by his wife and the recording is legal because he was uh doing a violent crime it's awful man yeah it's really awful man i don't know i'm just i'm shaking my head i don't know but i do think that

it's a very important debate to have is if it's considered, if it's a mental, a form of a mental illness, should they have somewhere to go to say, hey, I have these urges. I don't want to touch kid. Please help me. Should there be a safe haven for pedophiles to get help so that they don't touch children or at least it lowers the chances that they will touch children. That's the difficult question to ask. Yeah, it's some scary shit, you know, to think that you could be a person that is, in all other ways, a normal person, but like a crackhead around crack,

compelled, like you have an alcoholic and you set a glass of whiskey in front of them and you pour a glass of whiskey. I mean, they're drawn to that whiskey it's like a sickness exactly but that whiskey's not hurting anybody other than themselves when you see someone who's a pedophile and they're drawn to children we we tend to lose all of our sympathy and all of our understanding and it's because we want to protect our people you know we want to protect our family children but could you imagine i mean i'm not being sympathetic towards child molesters i mean

believe me i am the least sympathetic i have a very primal urge to break his fucking head open with a rock right but imagine being this poor fuck i mean what is it about him that makes him want to go to this 11 year old girl and put her hand on his dick? Jesus Christ. It's fucked. I was on that show for two years. I worked with him. What was the premise of the show? It was about an all-American family.

Basically, the premise was this is the perfect family. And they're an example for everybody. He was the minister and the father, and he had a wife and children. the minister and the father and he had a he had a wife and and children uh and uh and i played this i remember i my first scene i played this alcoholic who comes back in this kid peter's life and he he counsels me you know i'm a real a-hole and he counsels me and you know and and i really got to know him because we had so many scenes together and spent a lot of time did a reading for him i've talked to him on the phone about sag and all kinds of stuff and it's just fucking it's just i don't know man so this is confirmed i never would have thought that dude like you know what i mean that's the other thing like some people you go

there's no way well of course that's a that's a good person who i'd leave my kid with that you know anyway i it's you just don't know you don't know man you don't know what goes on the inner recesses of someone's brain. But I do think this is a case, if there's ever been one, I don't know anything. I'm not an expert, but of a good person with a sickness,

you know, of a guy, I don't know, man. I don't know. I'm just, I don't even know what to say about it. It's dark. It's dark shit. Dark, scary, awful stuff. And then I started thinking about other things that are really hard to even talk about like like there's what is and

there's molestation of a child we already know what it does to most people the revulsion and what you want to do and then there are different levels of molestation that nobody really talks about touching and then actual sex right right and one i would imagine and i have to believe is way more traumatic than the other yeah um i don't know how the law sees it but you know the guy's life is done i think it's sex is sex i mean i think the law sees it like if you're involving genitals and touching i mean it's one thing if there's sexual misconduct though and then there's assault. So one is penetration, I think.

Well, they're calling this violent sex, and that's the reason why she was allowed, or he rather, the woman rather, his wife, I was right the first time, she was allowed to record him in these counseling sessions is because it's violent sex. But what is violence? It's a violent crime, not violent sex, but it falls under the umbrella of violent sex. But what is violence? It's violent crime, not violent sex, but it falls under the umbrella of violent crime.

Right. But what is violence? It isn't violent. I thought violence is like trauma. I thought violence is like aggression. If someone takes your hand and gently puts it on their dick, it's awful, right?

Obviously evil. But is that violent? Because if he is dating a woman and he takes his hand and or takes her hand and put puts it on his dick that's not violent right or is it thought to be violent if she didn't want him to do that here's what i mean if she resists right like so let's say let's say he's with a woman they go back to his place they're having a glass of wine they're just talking and he takes her hand, and he puts it on his dick. And she resists, and then he lets go. Is that violent?

Or what if he takes her hand, and he puts it on his dick, and she struggles the whole way? That's violent. But if she doesn't resist at all, and she just goes... He was being inappropriate or assuming. Yeah, what's violent i mean the word violence a weird word i mean i guess we're kind of but but you have to have that conversation no you're not you have to have no but why violence but because first of all i think there is a difference between anal rape and oh yeah and vaginal rape and being touched i was

when i was a kid in camp i was 11 i was i guess technically molested by my camp counselor who was an old man in his 40s and he was touching me and fondling me i woke up and he had his hand in my pants he was playing with my my you know my piece my gag and i remember going i remember being 11 going this is weird man he's got a beard and he smells weird and he's touching my wiener i don't think this makes sense. So then I tell my friend John and Donnie. I go, hey, did he touch you down there? And my friend Donnie goes, yeah, he sucked me

down there. And then my buddy John goes, he touched me too. So I go, I'm going to tell my mom. And I marched. My mother was coming for parent weekend. I was away at camp. My mother came and I went right up to her and I go, hey, that guy touched my dick. He sucked Donnie's dick, and he touched John's dick.

And my mother went right to the camp. And the guy back then, this was probably, I don't know, what was it, 1978 or whatever? He got fired and just sent on his way. There was no criminal thing. Yeah, that was it. Sent on his way. And when they told his wife, he was married when they told his wife, his wife laughed and said, oh, God, he's up to that again. Yes, and my mother told his wife he was married when they told his wife his wife laughed and said oh god he's up to that again yes and my mother told me that oh my god yeah his wife laughed yes and

said he's up to that yes yes she was the arts and craft counselor she had a short hair anyway but isn't it strange how much our attitudes about those types of things have changed really, really radically? Well, I think because people are more open to talk about it and talk about the damage it did when they were kids. And I think the point I'm raising is that it all depends on the circumstances, the level of molestation, and what kind. I don't think that damaged me. But I can't speak for this girl. Look at you. You're a am i talking you're a mess it all came from that i'm a stand up comic a beard and a hand on your dick that's it but you do have to have that conversation about levels of degree because if you don't then it's not fair to people who are really raped

and you know i mean who are vaginally and anally and all that other stuff there's a difference well that's why this whole yes means yes law which was recently passed in california is is kind of offensive to people that have actually been raped if you don't know this law the idea being that a lack of resistance does not equal consent and you must get consent and so if someone thanks for taking all the romance out of sex by the way well it's crazy but but i guess i kind of see why they're doing it i kind of see that they don't want someone to feel like they were overwhelmed by someone they didn't know what to do and they couldn't say anything and so they think that by forcing people to say yes i

want to have sex with you, that this would... But there's also feminists want to be able to withdraw consent after the fact if they feel like they were tricked. So they want to be able to cry rape if you manipulated and lied to them. Like I said, I love you. Make love to me. And they have sex. I don't love you, you fucking dummy. Are you fucking kidding me?

No, I'm not. No, that's a real tenant of some forms of radical feminism. They want to be able to withdraw consent after the fact. Well, those lunatics can say what they want, but here's what I... This is why I think that's lunacy and why I think it's so insulting. If you're gang raped, you're held down by a stranger... There's an app now. There's a couple apps for the iPhone.

There's one called Good2Go. What is this one? Is that Good2Go? Yeah. I don't even know if it... Does it work on fingerprints or something like that? does it work on yeah some of them work on fingerprints and you have an app and i have an app and you click yes and i click yes and what are we doing you know well that's that that that's fucking lunacy in my opinion and and i think it's a

real insult to people who've been held down and raped by strangers or somebody they know in a violent manner. You know, it's, there are, I do think that there are times when somebody can be, you know, a woman is so overwhelmed she doesn't know what to say and she gets raped. I'm not a woman. I don't know what the fuck goes on, okay? And it's 100% I understand that. There's date rape and all that stuff. Well, there's also times where you really wish you said no and you don't like when it's happening and you don't know what to do and you just sit there and a guy has sex with you yes but i don't know what that is is that sexual assault how is the

man supposed to know if you don't say anything there's there's that and if you do say something and the man continues well that's rape right if you say please stop take you know don't take my pants off don't have sex with me and the guy does it anyway we'll both agree that's rape yes so what but then there's a problem with they're trying to say that if you're consuming alcohol i had thaddeus russell on the podcast okay he's a professor at occidental occidental college or university we never figured it out it's a college okay he was a professor at this college where these two kids, they were both freshmen, they were both young, they got drunk, they had sex, and the girl decided that it was rape because she was drunk when they had sex. Meanwhile, on her text messages, she's sending a text message to her friend, she sent a text message to him, he's saying, come over here, she says, do you have a condom he says yes she texts her friend i'm about to go have sex she went over to his house she had sex with him and then afterwards the college

decided that this was rape because she was intoxicated but he was intoxicated too they're both intoxicated they're communicating back and forth with each other but somehow or another he's responsible for his actions he was expelled from college she wasn't it sounds like like people who hate men it's feminism yeah that's a big part of what some feminism is not all feminism a lot of feminism is just striving for equality yeah i'm a representation sense yes in that sense yeah but the real problem is one of the women at occidental college that thaddeus russell referenced who counseled this this girl said that he fits the profile ready for this for being a rapist

because he came from a good family because he's a valedictorian and because he's on a sports team. Wow. Wow. That's terrifying. Be an underachiever I guess and then you won't be a rapist.

But how terrifying is that that he's privileged because he comes from a good family that he's on a sports team so he embraces the jock culture of sexual assault. Which jocks don't, but whatever. Well, whatever. And that he's a valedictorian, so because he's successful, he's got this drive to succeed, which could lead him to being a rapist.

Jesus Christ. What? The fuck? And he got expelled? He got expelled. He's suing, and there's a big lawsuit. But look, his life has changed. Her life has changed both

their lives have changed and it's what happened they got drunk and they fucked man and thaddeus russell had a really good point that i've always said is that one of the problems with women and sex is that we have this idea still in our heads a lot of people do that sex is a bad thing and that a man having sex with a girl, he's done something to her, taking something from her. And a lot of it comes from a bunch of fucking idiots that think that a woman having sex with a man is a bad thing.

So she gets shamed for it. So she feels bad for being shamed for having sex. And so she equates that with her having been, like a crime's been committed on her. Because people will make you feel bad. Because you, oh, that guy fucked you. Oh, you loser. Like, no, you had sex.

You're normal. You're alive. You're a person. You have hormones. It feels good. You did it because you wanted to do it. Men and women do it. Our Puritan values and our ridiculous notions, completely unequal, that a woman can have sexual experiences with a guy and more than one man, and she's a fucking slut.

But if a guy does it, he's a stud. It's stupid. It's stupid, and it's all based on Puritan values, and a lot of it's based on the time before birth control. That disease, when you didn't have antibiotics, you had to be very careful who you had sex with. But birth control, a big one. A woman having these responsibilities

that she has to worry about becoming impregnated you know where a guy can just fucking shoot loads all fucking willy-nilly till the cows come home and not worry about a goddamn thing happening to his body he's celebrated a woman has to be concerned every time she has intercourse that she might have to raise a child drop out of school or have an abortion those are those the real cold hard facts and so this this ground is very uneven but now you add in birth control which is like a lot of people believe like one of the radical changes in society in this culture was in the 1950s when they invented or 60s when they invented when did they invent birth control 50s or 60s. One of those. But a massive change

in the way human beings interacted. Males and females. Because all of a sudden the women's liberation movement happened. Women were allowed to have sex and not worry about constantly having to worry about being impregnated

and having babies with these dudes. Well, they just wanted to fuck. They were just young people who wanted to live their life and wanted to do what their hormones were telling them to do, to enjoy it. It's one of the great fun things in life

is a man and a woman having sex. And this idea that two people having sex if they're drunk is rape, the problem with it is it's only rape for the girl. It's not rape for the guy. No one is ever going to argue that if a guy and a girl get

together and they have a couple of drinks and the girl gets on top of the guy and has sex with him, that the guy got raped. No one is ever going to argue that. You can't take it to court. You'll be laughed at a court. So that's really unfair and really uneven. And it's a response to the really unfair and really uneven views that we have about men and women and their sexuality. So you think right now we're seeing a pendulum, we're seeing the high end of the pendulum, right, and it's going to come back and even out. Well, we're seeing a reaction. I mean, we're seeing a reaction to the sex that's been marginalized, that females have

been marginalized, that they've been oppressed. And then, look, rape is fucking real as shit, man. Like, we're in Alaska, and one of the things that we talked about while we were in Alaska with people that live there is how many people get raped up there yeah and that these women yeah women who live in alaska you're dealing with high rates of alcoholism you're dealing with isolated populations and you're dealing with a lot of rape well because there are few women very few women to men something crazy like seven to one seven men to one women yeah so let girls if you look at for dick, Alaska.

Alaska. Woo-woo! A lot of rugged men. Well, did you ever see they have those posters, like calendars they used to sell to gals? Yeah. The men of Alaska, and dudes in fucking cowboy hats and giant dongs sitting there with a fly fishing pole. Yeah!

I like to fish and fuck. Well, that's the funny thing about pornography when it comes to women. Some women enjoy watching men and women having sex but very few women like playgirl like playgirl and looking at guys cocks yeah that's for dudes yeah okay playgirl is for fucking dudes if you're a guy and you pose for playgirl you're doing gay porn right sorry i know you don't want to think no no no bro bro fucking girls are liberated man they're They like looking at my cat. Although more women are watching. More and more women apparently are watching porn. Dude, I looked at one playgirl once.

Once. Just once. I had a gun to my head. And a guy was like doing like, what's that baby, happy baby position? Oh, God. Where you're lying down, your feet are up in the air. And he was holding onto his ankles. And your legs are bent.

He was holding his feet. And his fucking cock was like three quarters hard. Because you're not allowed to show hard cocks in those magazines. Because hard cocks is hardcore pornography. Very strange. Soft dicks. When I was a kid, porn, you weren't allowed to show hard-ons. You had to show like semis.

Only semis. It was very strange. So like all porn scenes were guys, like they were making pastries. They were all like squeezing the base of their dick like they were trying to write happy birthday with their cock It's like that was that was all porn. That was all all magazines. There was no like penetration in magazines So all you got red tube and xx and x and all that shit It's changed like our our ability to view sex has changed so radically that people apparently especially kids are engaging in way more sex way more sex early and also the kind of sex they watch

yeah on tv because they think a lot of the women think they have to girls think they have to keep up with the boys fantasies because they've been watching all this porn and boys get really bored too apparently you know i've heard i've read studies or heard about studies where a lot of boys will um like when you and i were growing up just seeing a naked girl we weren't looking at imperfections we were like holy fucking shit she's naked like i don't nipple yeah boys now have access to you know these women that have been surgically enhanced and photoshopped and all that stuff and with makeup and their appreciation for linear lines and all that stuff is way more heightened.

They're way more picky. And so a lot of women, they'll go with one girl and then they'll go to the next girl and there's a lot more of that apparently. I don't know. Yeah, apparently. It's amazing though that we we have all these weird hang-ups in this day and age when it comes to sex and i

think a lot of it has to be because it's like sexual attraction is not an even thing i mean have you ever been around a woman who is not sexually attractive but she has a friend who's sexually attractive there's a a friend who's sexually attractive there's a lot of the women who are non-sexually attractive get fucking aggressive yes they don't like men they try to keep men away from their friend yep and they try to protect their friend but under the guise but it's not they're cock blockers they're hardcore cock blockers because they're angry that they're not sexually attractive and a lot of it is just a fucking genetic roll of the dice. Like you have perfect bone structure.

Your nose is the perfect shape. Your body's perfect shape. And everybody's gravitating towards you. But you go to the person on the left and this person, their dad was goofy looking. Their mom was goofy looking. And then they made goofy looking kids. And there's nothing that goofy looking kid can do about it. But when you're talking about these radical feminists who are coming up with these laws or whatever, again, this is the lunatic fringe.

This is an example of – we can bring it back to the Islam debate. You know, there are – I believe that these people are unreasonable. And there are a lot of people in religion that are unreasonable. And I think that these feminists who are pushing these laws are very similar to fundamentalists. They are religious in their own way. They have their own orthodoxy, their own fundamentalism, their own very strong ideas of what rape is. And rape is anything, anything that they deem it to be in this case. They put rape, they put somebody who didn't necessarily say they want to have sex on the same ground as somebody

who was violently raped by some stranger in a parking lot at knife point, whatever. And it's the same kind of human, some people have this need to be unreasonable to be fundamentalist in their beliefs and and it is in in its own way a prison of belief it is very similar to the kind of uh in this in the case we were talking about with islam the very similar mindset as a islamic fundamentalist well there's a lot of people are angry look there's a lot of men who are angry at women okay the angry male movement like there's the men's rights movement there's a a lot of those guys are fucking very angry at women there's a lot of the pickup artist movement oh god those guys there's a lot of them not all of them but a lot of them that i've i've read forums i've listened

to these guys talking videos there's a lot of them that are clearly angry with women. And one of the big arguments, one of the big points of contention, the big things they're pissed off about is them not being attractive to women. Because women want money, women want status, women want good-looking guys, they want this, they want that. So these pickup artists are showing you ways to circumnavigate that. That's exactly right. There's this one video where this guy in long hair and he's trying to be like a cool guy he's like i don't give a fuck if you're in a wheelchair i saw this have you seen this video because he goes i can teach you how to fuck yeah he's somebody he wanted he wanted to be in my podcast it was fucking preposterous he's disgusting and what these this idea is based on the fact that there's

some people that just women don't find attractive and they feel like it's not fair so they go out they try to pick they're going to manipulate their way into her pants well they're trying to because otherwise they're not going to get in there they're just not you know and why one of the reasons why a lot of this is an issue and this is what's really fucked up prostitution's illegal and prostitution should be fucking legal i agree you know and up prostitution's illegal and prostitution should be fucking legal i agree you know and if prostitution was legal and it was sanctioned and women were tested you'd have an outlet you would have an outlet and men would wouldn't have to like feel always that there's no way anyone's ever going to touch them that's true that's the

everybody wants to think there's something awful and terrible about prostitution look i don't want my daughter becoming a prostitute but guess what i don't want my daughter becoming a prostitute, but guess what? I don't want my daughter working at Wendy's either. I don't want my daughter being a waitress. If someone can give you a massage, and a massage is totally legal, what is a massage? It's someone, they don't want to touch you, okay? They're touching you because you're paying them. That's right.

And you feel good when they touch you. Why is that okay, but jerking you off is not okay? In Asian countries, they don't feel that way and a matter of fact in a lot of those countries massage with a jerk off at the end is a natural part of massage or what about just a woman who who who is willing to for a certain price fuck you shit she's in command of her own body. She's willing to engage in a transaction with you, an economic transaction. You want to touch this? On her terms.

No problem. It's on my terms? No problem. Why is that illegal? And why can't she make her rate? Why can't she say, look, you want to have sex with me. If you're kind to me and you're nice,

I will have sex with you. I want $5,000. Right. And she can have sex once a month, and that's it. And she doesn't have to work for the rest of the fucking month exactly she gets all of her bills paid and she's done right where is she no you're right sorry but why is that it's it's but it's the idea being that that person is a sicko but we were talking about um dominatrixes while we were uh in in camp and one of the things we were talking about was uh

like how weird it is that people like a lot of like really rich and powerful men especially pay to get dominated by women like women will tie them up and fucking rope their balls to the ground and all that shit you were talking to me about and that's okay like somehow or another that's okay like that falls because the guy is kind of being brutalized like it's okay even Like, somehow or another, that's okay. Like, that falls, because the guy is kind of being brutalized, like, it's okay. Even if it's, like, sexual, it's okay. It's, like, weird. But if it's just straight sex, you know,

if the woman puts her mouth in the guy's penis for 10 minutes. There's ejaculation, I guess, or whatever. Yeah. Well, doesn't that have its origins in religion? Religion, yeah. And so, again, this is where— The Puritan nature of this country. Right.

And so that, again, is what I'm saying about we live in a very religious country in many ways. And whenever you look at Islam or you look at Christianity, I believe that the majority of people from any religion, if you really talk to them, we have a lot more in common. We have a lot more in common. Americans have a lot more in common with, I bet, I bet a lot of the average Arab on the street, or Afghani if you really get them alone, a lot more in common than you think. I mean, my God, I guarantee most of them want some say in who governs them. Most people have doubts about their religion. Most people don't want to see people suffer and be hurt, even though their religion might say you should stone somebody, etc., etc. Most people don't want to see people suffer and be hurt, even though their

religion might say you should stone somebody, etc, etc. Most people are reasonable. Most people are that way. And and it is the loudest lunatic fringe that tends to sway the debate. Look at this country, look at the parties, the Republican and Democratic Party. Look at look at who really gets all the headlines. It's the loudest motherfuckers yeah and it's also if you grew up in that environment the reality is if that was your standard of behavior if you're around people like those guys in that video you know how many of you belong to regular mosque if you were if you're around that guy you'd be like that guy that's the reality is we imitate our atmosphere or you or you would assume the position when you're in church then you go about your day and life is busy and you're like and in that sense i can see i i totally see this pendulum swifting shifting back and forth and this this yes means

yes i i kind of see the origins of it and i kind of see like i see the whole thing from a larger perspective, but I just feel that as human beings trying to engineer our society, that what we should really be trying to do, if it is at all possible, is approach each other and approach these situations with kindness and compassion and love and dignity and and friendship the idea that we we could establish friendship and establish that people who are in certain situations do things that they regret whether it's a woman getting drunk having sex with a guy she didn't really want to have sex with after the fact when she realized like what have i done and, blah. But let's approach this with compassion. Right. Let's understand. Let's counsel these people to not get drunk and make poor choices. Let's not turn the men into rapists or use that term where there are real rapists. There are people that fucking hate women and they want to hold them down and put a knife

to their neck and fuck them just so they can say they did it. Right. Because they're evil cunts. Right. Those guys should be in jail. But the guy who gets drunk and has sex with a girl who says, do you have a condom? And the guy says, yes. And then texts her friend, I'm coming over.

I'm going to go have sex with this guy. That's not rape. No, it's not. It's just not. It's called personal responsibility. And to say that this young 18-year-old guy is supposed to have more responsibility in that scenario than the 18 year old girl is totally sexist completely it's unfair illogical it's unfair totally unfair and evil it's

evil yeah that's really sexist i mean that's like one of the most sexist approaches to two human beings enjoying each other's company that i could even imagine because you're dealing with a completely even scenario. A guy and a girl communicating that they want to be together. The girl communicating to her friend, she's about to go have sex, saying, I'm going to go have sex now. You know, Francis Fukuyama, who's the,

like, you know, Harold is this incredible intellectual who just wrote this book now, it's coming out, and, you know, he's just, he said that if you look at history, it's coming out and you know he's just he said that that if you look at history it's it's been man's man's quest for dignity like every culture every person like that that's what people really strive for as nations as people just the idea that they want some dignity they want some governance over their own body they want fair play they want to be heard they want to not be humiliated all those things and it's kind of an

interesting thing if you think about it under under one word what human beings really that human history has been sort of a march and a quest for dignity by peoples and by individuals we're trying to engineer a more idealistic society slowly but surely from the dark ages on to 2014 from the beginning of writing shit down on animal skins, trying to establish a set of moral principles based on the word of God or Allah or Buddha or whoever the fuck you want. We're trying to figure out a way to do things better. Yeah.

And that's what we're still doing. That's right. And so a law like this, the yes means yes, what are they trying to do? They're trying to stop sexual assault on campus, which is a real issue. I agree. And so are we. Yes. Right?

But it's a question of what your methodology is. Yeah. And whether you're creating more damage than good, whether you're being fair in this or not. And I think that's where the debate has to start. What is the common goal? We don't want people to be raped. We all agree with that if you're a reasonable person and a good guy. And now the question is, what's the best way to do that but how can anybody ever think that getting people to say you know like say okay do you want

to have sex with me yes i want to that's the only way to do it gross what i want i want romance man what about what happened to movies yeah what about the fun of it like oh my holy shit look what we're doing this is crazy the fun of kissing and then a girl reaches and grabs your dick and you're like i can't believe you didn't say are we going to have sex now there was no conversation so when you're kissing a girl and she just grabs your dick it's one of the greatest moments in life she's really is it really is one of the greatest moments in life when you're not sure what's going to happen you're young you're kissing i was. I was on a date once with this girl, and I thought it was done. I thought, well, whatever. I took her on a date, and I was pulling out all the stops,

talking about this, that, lying about celebrities I know, et cetera, et cetera. It was all going well, but she was not impressed. And so finally, I was like, all right. It was in New York City. I was going to put her in a cab, and she goes, you put me in a cab? And I went, what do you mean? And she goes, so that's it? You put her in a cab and she goes, you put me in a cab? And I went, what do you mean? She goes, so that's it? You put me in a cab.

You're wimping out? I was like, never mind, cab driver. We're going up to my place. I was like, yee-haw. Those are some of the greatest moments of your life as a young man. Yeah. Those are some fucking good times. When it all works out.

I mean, there's ones that work out terribly. There's ones that you get together and, you know, one person says something stupid and the other person says something stupider. And you're like, oh, fuck. We're in a fucking quagmire. Yeah. No one's getting out of this. It ain't going to work.

Yeah. Personalities clash and it doesn't always work. But when it does work, God, it's magic. And to try to quantify that magic with a conversation of consent and people say well your romance is not as important as a woman's sexual sovereignty and you need to establish shut the fucking the the really gross voices in this are not even the women because i think fundamentally a lot of women probably have a really hard time understanding the male urge. Just like fundamentally, a man has a very difficult time truly conceptualizing the idea that a woman wants to get pregnant.

You know, the urge to have a baby grow in your body is fundamentally a very difficult thing for a guy to wrap his head around. Yes. very difficult thing for a guy to wrap his head around yes and so when a woman wants to like do something that's illogical to sort of regulate male sexuality i almost kind of understand it i almost kind of look at it and i go well yeah i guess they just don't they don't i mean maybe they don't know what it's like to be a man you know right but when a man steps in and starts saying a bunch of really illogical shit, when a man starts taking radical feminist points of view, that shit becomes very offensive to me. Because then, that's when I know what you're really doing is,

you're trying to earn favor. You're trying to establish this really unusually moral position. Social brownie points. Social brownie points. Social brownie points. social brownie social brownie points social brownie points hashtag social brownie points hashtag male feminists and you know i mean look again we both have i don't want to call them feminists but we both have what we call humanist values like i think absolutely everyone should be treated equally in in in the law but we're not equal in society no we're just not just like

we're not equal some people are stronger faster whatever yeah some people are smarter it's just the world is weird man some people are tall some people are short some people are sexually attractive some people people are not we're not equally funny some people are not fucking funny they never will be some people suck at math i'm one of them some people you know there's like a lot of shit that's just not fair it's just the world the world is weird and when men come along and they want to establish some some weird fake male behavior rules and i know what they're doing when i know what they're doing when i I know what they're doing, when I know they're saying things, they're making videos about, like, that, we talked about it on the Thaddeus Russell podcast, that Dear Woman video.

You ever see the Dear Woman video? Oh, you've never seen it either? No. For real? Jamie, pull it up one more time. One more time. Just for the folks at home that may not have seen it. It's these guys who no woman in their right mind would ever want to touch and these guys

all those guys are the greatest women have you seen it yes yes you have seen that those guys are the perfect you don't have to thank you for your strength yeah yes thank you for your wonderful characteristics we apologize for all the men who treated you poorly like what choking you when you ask to be choked when you get fucked? There's reality. Of course. Those men are traitors. Yeah. Those men are gender traitors.

And all of them to a man or women or men that women wouldn't want to fuck. Right. That's what they're trying to sit. Yes. Or there's a couple of them that look like players in there that are just taking that stance. Bad guys. Impostors. They're creepers.

Impostors. There's a they're creepers imposters there's a lot of creepers out there man on both sides who is it like dante in the in the inferno said he goes that imposters when he created his image of hell which was a cone inverted cone and the very worst the bottom of the center of the earth are you know murderers and and and sadistic killers and imposters imposters are actually down there with them. Cunts! Cunts! Yeah, there's a lot of that out there, man.

There's a lot of, well, there's just a lot of, again, there's a lot of uneven in the world. Like, there's a lot of people that are these, remember when, did you ever see Peter Schiff when he was at Occupy Wall Street? No. And there was a bunch of people that were on Occupy Wall Street and he had this video.

Peter Schiff's a brilliant guy, economist, and I had him on the podcast. Fascinating. I don't necessarily agree with all of his points of view, but he's a very bright man and he knows so much more

about economics than I ever will. Right. And he was talking to these people and he set up a booth, like a stand, you know, and had a big sign that said,

ask a one percenter. And if you've never seen it, pull that up, because it's fucking amazing. And it's these people that are angry, man, but their ideas are so uninformed, poorly thought out, and easily picked apart. And one of them was like, why do you need so much money, man? He's like, I employ 100 people. Who do you employ? How many people do you employ?

How many people do you help? You're asking me, why do I need so much money? Why do I make so much? It's just capitalism. You're a capitalist, too. You're just not good at it. Do you pay money for food? Do you pay money for rent?

Well, then you're a capitalist. You get paid for work. Do you get paid for work? Yes, you get paid for work. You're a capitalist. You're just not good at it. This is incredible. It's amazing.

Ask the 1%. And I agree with the sentiment. And I agree with the fact that you should be protesting. It's just my point is it's Washington that should be the recipient of the protest. You guys should be marching on the White House and the Federal Reserve demanding your freedom back. Look, Steve Jobs just passed away. He made billions. How many people here have iPhones in their pockets?

I feel like what you want is... He's not a humanitarian. He's a businessman. But he enriched the lives of millions of people pursuing his own self-interest. I am not a ramp so that you can do an ollie in front of your camera. I actually want to have a conversation. The what?

The 99% to 1% meme. With just one meme out of many memes. What's a meme? I'm so sorry. A popular turn of phrase. Okay. So the catchphrase 99%. This is not 99% park. It's Liberty Plaza. And the 99% catchphrase is not definitive of everyone here. It makes sense why a popularity meme would be popular. I understand you have to make money, but there's got to be regulations,

because I believe in democracy, but I also believe in regulations. The market has to grow at a sensible rate, right? It cannot grow too fast. If the market grows too fast, it will crash. See, the regulation we want is the market. That's the regulation that works. The same thing is with labor. A corporation just can't take advantage of its workers and pay them as little as it wants because businesses compete with one another to buy labor. Did a corporation end slavery? Here we go. What does slavery have to do with what we're talking about?

We're saying there is a role for government in our society and corporations cannot do everything. But slavery was wrong to begin with. So let's not even, it was government that created it. Government is there to protect property, life, liberty, and that's it. You've mentioned Walmart. So what are you afraid that Walmart's gonna do to you?

What am I afraid they're gonna do to me? What is Walmart doing to me? You should go and ask the employees that are working in sweatshop-type conditions that don't get enough hours, that don't have health care. Wait a minute. Why don't they quit? I mean, Walmart doesn't hold a gun to their head. If they can get a better job.

So why did the rape victim get raped? What was she doing out late at night? Do you want to go back to 1920, 1930? What is this golden year that Republicans want to go back to? What year? The 60s? The 70s? What year? I don't want to go back to that technology, but I want to go back to? What year? The 60s? The 70s? I don't want to go back to that technology, but I want to go back to that level of freedom.

The level of freedom for who? For everybody. Women couldn't vote at some point. African-Americans and others had to ride in the back of the bus. You want to go back there. We don't want to go back there. I'm telling you, there's more economic freedom. There was more economic freedom, but we're talking about social freedom and social justice.

There's been memorials for Steve Jobs all over the place, at every Apple store. There's reporters that are all around the world that never asked one single question to Steve Jobs when he was alive. Why are you manufacturing your iPhone in China and you don't have any of your manufacturing here in the United States? Do you think that's fair to the American people? Wait, the American people don't have any of your manufacturing here in the United States. Do you think that's fair to the American people? Wait, the American people don't own those jobs. Steve Jobs has a right to manufacture where he wants. He does have a right to do it.

And the problem is we have made it too expensive for him to manufacture here. Oh, we did. The government. Because the American workers want too much? No, the government put too much... Because we want too much healthcare? Oh, it's the government's fault. Remember, the reason that employers want to lower wages is because their customers want low prices. Everybody in this park wants low prices.

You can't have low prices. No, we don't. Do you believe that the federal government has a right to exist and to govern the lives of American people? It has the right to exist, but not in the form it exists today. It's operating outside the Constitution. Do you believe the EPA should be disbanded? I think it does a lot more harm than good. Do you believe the FDA should be disbanded?

Yeah, I'd like to get rid of it. What about the FDA? Uh-huh. The Board of Education? I think we should have... What about the Board of Education? I want to get rid of the entire Federal Department of Education. Yes, it is wasting our money, and it is running up the cost of education.

Sir, what I've learned... No, no, no, let me finish. What I've learned over the years is to never argue with a fool, and you, my friend, are a fool. Okay, so I'm foolish, right? You're foolish. So I just stumbled into all my wealth. I run all these businesses.

How could you disband the EPA and the FDA and the Board of Education? You're a fool. It's not the Board of Education. You're talking about the Department of Education. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. It's emotional arguments. Did I call you an idiot? Did I call you an idiot. You're talking about the department of education. It's emotional arguments. No, you didn't. 30% of the homeless people in America are veterans.

So when everybody says we support the troops, that's a lie. You support the troops when they're out there getting killed or shot. But when they come home and they're homeless and they got no jobs, you don't support the troops. Well, I didn't even support a lot of these wars that put those troops over there in the first place but all right this guy's great though this guy's government you wanted to change and all that but you guys are the ones or at least these guys here on wall street are the ones that are funding all the campaigns and putting these people in power in the first place right but and then you do so because you know that they will enact policies that you want and then you also know that once they do that and you become friends with them through campaign fundraising and all that that is the problem that they will enact policies that you want. And then you also know that once they do that, and you become friends with them through campaign fundraising and all that.

That is the problem, that they will let you in the government, and you'll be like, hey, can I be secretary of the treasury? If they had no power, there'd be no lobbying. There'd be nothing to give out. We don't want the government to be able to pick winners and losers, to say you get a bailout and you don't, you pay a tax and you get a subsidy that is the problem is this one guy that i actually wanted you to focus on that was like he was

asking him why do you need so much money like why do you need why can't you make you know 10 million dollars instead of 100 million dollars you're talking about this is uh other black dude i think you have dreadlocks well there's such an example of if you hold a point of view, it takes a long time to earn it. Do you care what the bank does with your money when you deposit it there? Do you care about the loans? I do. Why? Do you worry?

It might not be in this chunk. It might be a different one. There's a bunch of these videos out there. What a gutsy guy. I love that he did this. He's got, is it two hours? Yeah. Oh, Jesus Christ.

Yeah, well, it's the wrong one. There's one that was a short clip. But that's such a classic example of like, you might be angry, I understand, is it two hours? Yeah. Oh, Jesus Christ. Yeah, well, it's the wrong one. There's one that was a short clip. But that's such a classic example of like, you might be angry, I understand, but it's exactly the great Thoreau quote. I see men everywhere hacking at the branches of evil while none are striking the root. And if you want to say something's evil, if it's Wall Street, if it's Big Pharma, if it's whatever, it's so crucial to establish what kind of evil. And the way you figure that out is who is the real enemy? What is the root cause? That's why you've got to read.

That's why you've got to earn your opinion. Otherwise, you're just shouting in the wind and you're just part of that anger. Well, not only that, you can't have a conversation like this where one guy has a microphone and he's going back and forth, handing it to you and you, and you're doing it in a video clip. And you're saying, you know, I want to end this. I want to end that. I want to end the Department of Education. You're a fool.

Oh, okay. We didn't get anything done here. Two people shouting their point of view. Yeah, I mean, to really establish what is wrong with the Department of Education, you have to have a long, nuanced conversation about what they're doing, how they're funded, what the problem is, how they subsidize college tuition so that it costs so much more for you to actually go to college, the reason why it's so goddamn expensive, and it would be different if this didn't exist. Talking to people who know their shit and reading the right books who make a good argument is how you get closer, at least.

Investigation over some time is how you get closer to figuring out where the real problems lie yeah it's the emotions that flare up when people start talking about things and they don't really have an educated opinion on them they just go there because they know something's wrong i equated occupy wall street to like white blood cells i'm like they know there's an effect infection so they all circle around this area of infection, but it's not noticeably affected. That's a really, really good metaphor for that because you're right. It was a combination of a lot of things. But it wasn't effective.

It's like they got there and like, there's a fucking infection. We're white blood cells. But nothing really got done other than, well, one thing did get done. It opened up the dialogue. But the dialogue was already opened up and people understood the bailout. People started paying attention to the bailout. And when people went broke and didn't know why. Yeah.

But, yes, it's why there are some very important and very challenging problems in the world. And there are people out there that are coming up with good answers. But unfortunately, and one of the things that's beautiful about a podcast, what I try to do with mine and what you certainly do with yours, is that a lot of really good ideas are stuck in books. And I think that technology, podcasting, if it's done responsibly, a lot of other venues, is how you get those ideas out of those books. Most of us don't have that much time to read man we don't and i sympathize with that i get it it's really hard to formulate an educated opinion on shit you and i know that

you know like how many opinions that we'd have when we started doing podcasting and then i'd get corrected on this podcast my podcast i'd come up with a point of view and say something and people would be like by the way uh you're a little bit wrong on this and i'd go i've been holding that belief for 10 fucking years and when you start to really investigate and try to come up with a really sound strong political philosophy business philosophy life philosophy it takes a lot of fucking work yeah it's hard it's hard to let go of opinions but don't stop trying to come up with the answer a lot of people do not ever want to let go of their opinions once they have that opinion that motherfucker is locked in because they form

an emotion around it that's why because it's exactly like talking to somebody when you see a religious person talk to an atheist the atheist says god doesn't exist the religious person goes wait a minute my religion gives me a feeling and a very good feeling it makes me feel like there's purpose and meaning in my life this guy's attacking that and then it becomes about that it becomes not about religion it becomes you're trying to take the feeling i have away from me fuck you well that's why opinions are very hard to let go of yeah it's all it's also when people are having conversations a lot of times they're not just expressing each other and exchanging information or expressing themselves and exchanging information.

They're also trying to win. Yes. They're trying to be the one with the correct information. They're trying to be the smarter person. And sometimes they're doing it about stuff they don't really fucking have any information about. But they're still in there swinging, like flailing away like a person who doesn't know how to fight who gets in fights me have you ever seen a person who doesn't know how to fight we all have yes i've talked about it on this podcast this terrifying scenario that happened one night in front of the comedy store

where i saw this guy get in a fight with this guy who didn't have any fucking skill at all he didn't know what to do he didn't know how to handle panic and he was he has eyes closed he was flailing and a bus pulled in front of him i couldn't see what happened you know that because you know they were fighting on one side of the street and the bus blocked my vision and then when the bus passed he was out cold on the concrete so obviously somebody punched him but the guy didn't know how to fight but yet he was still fighting and some people will get in arguments about some shit they don't have any information about they don't have nothing but they have a point they have an opinion yeah and an attitude that is based on something that happened to them, an emotional thing.

We all have some of that in us. I certainly do. And I've worked very hard to try to let go of that shit when I'm in an argument. And sometimes I have to check myself and go, man, I'm arguing to be right here because this person's attacking something else inside of me i'm not even aware of yeah or whatever and you see it in relationships i gotta i gotta check myself in my relationship sometimes we'll just start having an argument i'm just pissed off and i want to have an argument because i i feel like i want to be right about this subject and when i take a step back a lot of times it's really hard to do but it's really important sometimes you go you know what i

actually don't know that much yeah and sometimes someone will say something crazy to you and instead of saying wait a minute why did you say you'll say something crazy back and the next thing you know it's a fucking avalanche of crazy both of you're swinging swinging into the air and emotional and fucking can't breathe good it's also really fuck it's also really important to identify what you mean by x yeah what do you mean by god what do you mean by religion what do you mean by first before we start let's let's know what we agree on and it's i like politics i love the argument now that i have with politics is this i don't talk about republican democrat liberal conservative i like the question of we know that you need some governance. Of course you need some governance in a society. The debate really revolves around to what percent?

How much do you want government running your lives? There's an answer. And some people want more. There's just an answer. To what degree in what aspect? It's a complicated question. But start the debate and the discussion that way. And you'll get further along.

I like having my mind changed. I like having my mind changed i like having my mind changed i like listening like you were talking the other day and you were explaining like where technology was going and i had a lot of opinions i've been reading the same shit i was about to jump in with a bunch of my points as well but then i was like wait let me just listen to this and i learned some shit that i didn't know before it's a new thing for me man it's a new thing for you a little bit like to really listen and key into what somebody's saying and say and look for something new and look for something that you might not know instead of trying to add to the conversation hey by the way guys this is something i know as well we all do that we fucking do that all the time everybody

does it oh joe's saying this let me add let me this to it. Let me put a cherry on that Sunday for you guys to show you that I'm also knowledgeable and smart. Instead of just keying in, maybe not saying anything. You know what I like? You know what I like? What answer I like from people a lot of times? What do you think of this? And a lot of people go, I don't know. It's a good answer.

It's a good answer. It's very important. It's very important. Yeah. Being able to say you don't know. That's like, why is that hard for people? It's hard because we equate our knowledge, like how much knowledge we have with how strong we are. And I don't know sounds weak.

Yeah. And our personal, you know, our personal opinion of ourselves. But we're coming to find out, especially in this day and age, that's one of the good things about things like google you can't know everything you cannot i've had fucking conversations with people where they seem fairly intelligent and then they'll say something they'll want to have a conversation about martial arts and they'll say something so off base and so ridiculous that now i have to question everything that they've said before. Because you've just stepped into my world. And you stepped into my world acting like you know what the fuck you're talking about. Well, I go, well, how many of these other things you've told me are bullshit too?

That's so disappointing. I've had that happen to me where people will say something and you go, you're really smart at a lot of stuff and you just stepped into a different arena. You're in the middle of the ocean with no boat right now. It's one of the few things where I'll just completely stop the conversation i go no no stop yeah i just i i get offended when people start talking about like chi and you know it's about it's about your centering your energy and some people can't be pushed over please shut the fuck up stay in your lane you want to see something amazing though that is real some real martial arts shit that is kind of like magic?

Yes. Jamie, there's a video on my Twitter feed that's from today. And it's from a long time ago, from I think it was the 1950s. This fucking old man doing judo with his top students. And this old dude is like, I don't know how old he is at the time but he's fucking old he's old and it's he's he's really frail looking go full screen on this this is fucking incredible man i mean is this is really incredible to watch does it say how old he is in this video yeah he looks like a skeleton dan preparing to challenge uh he's preparing for a challenge with high-level students.

Now, watch what the fuck happens, man. This is a tiny little old man. And this isn't bullshit, okay? I know bullshit and I know choreography. I'm watching this judo, and these guys are really trying to throw this dude. But check this out. Look at this old dude. Whoa.

Amazing. Just perfect technique. Look at how his legs go flying up in the air. Look at this. How he resists the technique. Look at that. Effortless almost. This guy's trying to throw him. Fuck yeah he is. He's trying to throw him but the old man knows exactly how to position himself. Watch. Look. See? Damn! He goes behind the hip every time. It's amazing. Amazing. And watch these young guys guys these young black belts are watching this this guy is old as fuck he's much smaller but watch how he throws him it's incredible he finds the look at this look at this every time he tries to throw him and then he they bowed each

other and then the next guy comes along and this guy is fucking tiny man this old dude is i mean i don't know how big the other guy is but he's significantly smaller than the other guy it's hard because we're not standing there in perspective but we're watching this little old man get rag dolled that's crazy but when he gets picked in the air look at how he just goes with it he mean he look that guy fucking tried so hard and the old man just just flowed with him Just got behind his hips and stayed relaxed. Look at that relaxed Stayed relaxed guy tried. He's really trying to throw him you can see yeah, he is 100% But look at this boom the old man waits for his moment and throws him. I mean, it's brilliant

It's amazing to watch and judo water man. Judo is one of the roughest when it comes to martial arts on your body. So watching this old, really old man throw these young cats around is incredibly impressive because of the fact that it's so physically dependent. I mean, you see

the really great judokas. Look in the UFC, like Hector Lombard. Look at that. Boom. The old dude sent that guy flying. Oh, shit. I mean, these are... Oh, shit. It's incredible, right?

Whoa, this is fucking amazing. Look at this. He's like a... It's like a movie. Yeah, look how he goes with it when the guy tries to throw him. He just goes. He's in perfect position every time. Well, his hips, yeah.

His hips are... It's positioning. Look at that. Boom. Like, I was going to say... And these hips, yeah. His hips are... It's positioning. Look at that. Boom! Like, I was going to say, and by the way, these are... Man, I don't know what kind of floor that is, but that's not like modern fucking matted floors. It's like wood. It's probably hard as shit.

Like Hector Lombard, like a physical specimen. Ronda Rousey, physical specimen. And these are like great judokas that are in mixed martial arts today. specimen and these are like great judokas that are in mixed martial arts today you know and there's a lot of like their explosion their ability to close the distance and execute techniques that can be attributed to this power and athleticism but this old dude ain't got none of that man because you know if you watch it like in the olympics it's so explosive it's like boom it's like so quick it's amazing this dude's like. He's literally like a ghost. Yeah, it's incredible, man. It's incredible to watch.

Have you ever seen me dance? Show up in some videos? I really wish I knew more about this dude. How, when this was filmed. What is this called, this video? It says amazing old judo throw defense. The guy's name is Mifune. M-I-F-U-N-E.

Accepts challenges from high-level students It's incredible Really trying of course he is of course he is I mean you could see the effort and he's doing the right thing to me the Guy who's trying is a fucking high-level judoka himself like look at least throwing these techniques He's trying these hip tosses, and he's not getting anywhere with it He's got ridiculous haircut that guy the old look at this the old guy just he keeps getting behind his hips you see how he places his weight every time yeah it's just look at this oh shit look at that oh my timing man he can see his opening what are you that guy is a one is the first dan he's a

first degree black belt and this guy's an eighth degree black belt here but the old man's a 10 so this guy right here is like probably the highest level student that he's uh done it against in this video but it's just it just shows how technique is everything it's so fucking important and athleticism with great technique is almost unbeatable it's one of the reasons why a guy like lombard is so good it's because he has one of the reasons why a guy like Lombard is so good is because he has both of those. His technique is flawless. I wonder what Lombard would say if he saw this. Like, what is his point of view?

Well, judokas are very proud of judo. You know, like, judo Jean LaBelle is very proud of it. Ronda's proud of it. You know, judo is a fucking hard martial art, man. It's hard on the body, very difficult to learn. And it requires a great deal of understanding. Understanding of the mechanics of the body and leverage. Rhonda told me she was like 11, and she broke her toe.

And she was crying, and her mother made her run laps. Her mother goes, you might break your toe in competition. Run laps. She was just like, you know. She's a little badass. Her mother's a hard woman. Yeah, but look what she created. Oh, she created the...

An extreme winner. You know, what's interesting is... I love her. Ronda is going to, you know, she's going to defend her title against Kat Zingano. And if she beats Kat Zingano, Cyborg is scheduled to fight as a 135-pounder for the first time in December in Invicta. Invicta is an all-female mixed martial arts league and cyborg is the 135 145 pound champ she's dropping down to 135 for the first time it's fucking very hard cut but like a lot of these people that maybe did some questionable

things that made them get larger maybe something they lose weight and then they become smaller and you know i mean maybe different human being maybe it'd be easier for now to drop that weight i mean i don't know but it's um it's certainly a very fucking compelling matchup because cyborg well there was a picture of her and her husband uh from behind and her back was about as wide as her husband's and her husband was a stud i mean he was a was a wide, thick, strong guy. She's a big gal. Yeah.

Big, thick gal. Yeah. But, you know, if you do hardcore cardio, like marathon running and shit like that, your body will automatically start to shed. Shed that kind of weight. Atrophy the muscle. Right.

You're going to start slimming down. Just change your diet. You can force yourself to lose weight. I mean, you can only force yourself to lose a certain amount and still be athletically competitive. But she's still doing strength and conditioning exercises. She's still doing all sorts of things that build muscle. And if she didn't, if she really wanted to drop down to 135 pounds, she'd have to diminish her body mass.

Who that you know, fighter-wise, I was thinking about BJ Penn, but who do you know who's really fought in the most drastic weight categories? BJ's the most. BJ fought heavyweight and then fought featherweight. How much did he weigh when he fought heavyweight? He fought, he was probably 190-something. Maybe he was a little bit heavier than that, but when he

fought Lyoto Machida, Machida was over 205, so Machida was technically a heavyweight. Crazy. I don't know what machida weighed he's not tall i mean he's no short it's a fucking animal though and his best in his prime he was a fucking animal yeah um but i think that he's probably the the biggest example of a high level guy that's fought i mean and obviously machida went on to be the light heavyweight champion and is a contender right now in the middleweight division and bj just fought as a featherweight so it's fucking he's got the most drastic change was there

any follow-up as to like a lot of people were really surprised by when he was fighting frank frank edgar in this last fight he his feet were so close together and he's on his toes it was very strange yeah was there was there ever an was that ever addressed by him or by anybody else yeah he said he was trying to conserve energy. And then he decided that that was a stance that he was going to adopt because in keeping his legs wide and pushing off with his legs, that it would require too much energy. He's always had a problem with stamina.

That's been his problem. He was ferocious in the first round of the second fight with Matt Hughes, or the third fight, second fight? Whatever fight he lost. Second fight. Third fight he knocked matt hughes out he was ferocious in the first round and then ran out of gas in the second matt hughes started beating him down the second round and it was because matt hughes was in better shape bj at his best was when he was training with the marinoviches because marinoviches were fucking animals when it came to strength and conditioning and they got him in unbelievable shape. He was just shredded.

He had abs. He was fighting at 155 pounds. He was strong. And when he beat Joe Stevenson, when he beat Diego Sanchez at 155 pounds, he was the best. He was at his best. And he was just in incredible shape. He was a monster. But it was conditioning.

Just lives a good life. He lives in Hawaii. He's got plenty of money. He's a hero. He goes to Hawaii everywhere he goes. BJ! BJ! monster that but it was conditioning just you know lives a good life he lives in hawaii he's got plenty of money he's a hero he goes to hawaii everywhere he goes bj bj that's awesome they love him it's very difficult for a guy that lives in silk sheets to get up and go to war every day that's the reality of life yeah it's hard and a really loved guy who also is supremely physically talented people don't know that he's a prodigy you know that nickname the prodigy it came because and a really loved guy who also is supremely physically talented. People don't know that BJ, that nickname, the prodigy,

it came because he won the world championships after three years of training in jiu-jitsu. But I've heard other fighters like Eve Edwards and those guys tell me that they'd never seen anybody pick up a technique that quickly. So when you're an MMA fighter, picking up a technique, whatever it might be, you've got to drill it. It takes a long time. Sometimes it can take up to a year or four months, five months.

That dude could see it twice and it was part of his repertoire. Well, I don't want to say he was a natural fighter, but that was something that he had a lot of passion for and he was very focused about it and it came pretty quickly to him.

But there's a lot of other guys that have slowly dropped weight. McVitor fought as heavy as 240 at one point in his career. When he fought Randy Couture, I think he was like 240-something. His neck was so ridiculous. And now he's much thinner now, man. Now that he's off the TRT, he's really looking thin. There's been a lot of people.

They've always said his frame was like 180. I mean, if you look at his hands and feet, they're not they're not big no well there's a lot of people that think he can make welterweight especially now that he's off trd yeah yeah there's videos of him working out there's a recent video on his instagram and uh it went on the underground like people were looking at it like they're like seriously i'm not bullshitting i think he could be a welterweight i mean look at some welterweights. Like, okay, here's a perfect example. Carlos Condit.

He's a big boy, you know? Look at some of the guys. Like, okay, Tyron Woodley. Tyron Woodley is a big fucking guy. He's thick as shit. And he manages to get down to 170. Vitor doesn't look that big. Not now.

What is Carlos Condit way you think on the offseason? He's probably bordering in the 90s like gets around 190 close to it 15 pounds 20 pounds over the weight limit handsome kid too good looking guy yeah he's um recovering from knee surgery tore his acl against woodley so damn good carlos condit is just so good yeah talk about conditioning that dude will fight a five-round fight or i don't know if he had to fight a five-rounder. Yes, he fought GSP as a five-round fighter. And he just is going practically at the same pace.

Well, we were watching Rory McDonald knock out Tarek Safiany this week, and we were watching the highlights of it. My friend Robin Black, who also has been on the podcast, did a breakdown of it. And he did an awesome breakdown of it and really highlighted some of the things that Rory did really well in that fight and things that Safanin did to try to, like, throw Rory off that didn't work. But Rory McDonald's another one at 170

that's fucking terrifying. And an interesting, interesting guy, man. You know, was training with GSP for a long time, and then as they got further along in their career it started getting the talk about like these guys might eventually fight now that gsp's retired and he's like one of the number one contenders now he's that was one of the most impressive things i've ever seen his his ability to stand there with safadine and beat him in his own game i mean beautiful it's just incredible i mean you look at what safadine when safadine

fight fought nate marqut, how well he did against Marquardt, and then see Rory pick him apart like that. It's incredible. Check the leg kicks, stay on the outside. And delivering his own leg kicks. Yeah. God. Yeah.

Amazing. And that jab and that, oh, just the way he knocked him down. Yeah. Rory's a motherfucker. Yeah. It's such an exciting sport. But another thing we were talking about in camp it was really interesting where we were talking about um the reality of these guys

damaging themselves you know brian and i were at the airport yesterday in seattle and we were watching a football game and we don't particularly watch football that often so we're watching it which is all i could see was these guys' heads colliding. That's all. Just, thunk, those helmets colliding with each other. And all I could think about was that recent NFL study that showed that 76% of deceased NFL players, 76 out of 79, had brain injuries. Like, significant brain.

76 out of 79 brains they studied had significant brain injury. Significant brain damage. Well, then you're starting to see it. You see Tony Dorsett, and you see these guys joe montana trying to talk really yeah he's having yeah he's having issues with his memory yeah um uh what's the fucking guy yeah brett farve is having real issues right um well he's brett farve never took a day i mean brett farve had the longest run i mean he was the iron man i mean he was. He was getting knocked on his ass by the biggest, toughest guys. Never broke a bone.

I mean, he was just the Superman. Got addicted to painkillers, I believe, for a while. That is no surprise. I mean, that guy put himself through punishment like no football player I've ever seen. Who's the guy from the Chicago Bears from the 80s? Oh, Jim McMahon. Jim McMahon. Jim McMahon's got McMahon. Yeah.

Jim McMahon's got some serious issues now. And he talks about how sometimes he'll be in his house and he'll have no idea what he was about to do or where he's going. He just doesn't know what he's doing. He's just standing there like, what am I doing? Jesus. Yeah. And he was on a sports radio show and he was talking about it in depth. It was a cover of Sports Illustrated, him and his issues. It soured me to the game, I'll be honest with you.

I used to watch football all the time, and the more I learn, I'm like, I don't really want to, I don't know. But what about MMA? Because, look, let's be realistic. I feel like it's not as, I feel like, and it's changing because of training, but I feel like the head trauma isn't as sustained, it isn't like football or boxing. Am I wrong?

Yes. Okay. Yeah, no, it's it's um especially because so much emphasis is on stand-up these days and it used to be there was a recent interview interview um with um dan hardy and dan hardy was talking about uh you know dan had a heart condition not a real heart like it's it's a very controversial situation where he's very fit and healthy but he has like an extra heartbeat, something wolf condition. I forget what it's called.

But he was talking about how when he was fighting, it was a lot of wrestlers that were dominating the 170-pound division, and now there's a lot of kickboxers. Now you've got Rory McDonald. Now you've got Robbie Lawler. You've got a lot of strikers, a lot of stand-up strikers. Yeah. Well, guys who can wrestle and they can do all those things,

but a lot of kickboxing techniques are starting to dominate these contests. And when you're training a lot of kickboxing, you've got a lot of head injuries. There's a lot of head trauma that's going on both in training and in fights. It's always changing, too. I mean, I've never seen the block that Rory McDonald was using.

That high elbow block? Never seen that in Muay Thai. Well, it's very smart to avoid strikes to the head. Especially if you know that a guy is throwing head punches. You know, and a lot of these guys, they're not throwing the type of really long form combinations

that you'll see high level Muay Thai or high level Dutch kickboxers throw. They're throwing one or two techniques. And a lot of it's because you're worried about takedowns you're what we're seeing is just an evolution of the game we're seeing seeing the sport evolve i love it i mean i'm a huge fan but it concerns me brain damage is a very very uh it's a very real thing and there's no turning back that's what bugs me the most you could you put on could you bigger gloves i mean no that's not gonna help that might even hurt actually yeah the solution might actually be no gloves that might be a better

solution when it comes to head trauma because you can't hit as hard without breaking your hands you have to be much more selective in the your punch placement you go out faster in a weird way too right i mean well i don't know about that i think you probably go out harder and faster with the ufc gloves because they pad your knuckles so you can punch harder. And also, you're supporting the wrist. You're taping the wrist down. I think, realistically, you shouldn't be able to tape your wrists. You should be able to tape your hands.

And I think that would probably be one of the best ways to protect against head trauma. Still, though, it's like you know as well. You put on headgear and you get hit. Somebody's wearing boxing gloves. You're sparring. You get hit. put on headgear and you get hit with somebody's wearing boxing gloves You're sparring you get hit you got headgear. I wear a bar. They call me a pussy I got a bar that I get hit just in the top of the head. I got a headache Yeah, why because my head got jammed back and my brain was you know mushed around Yeah, and I was like what am I doing even shop Brenna shop was like, what are you doing?

You want to do this? You're not a fighter. You're an actor. Why are you sparring? I was like, I don't know you doing you really want to do this you're not a good fighter you're an actor why are you sparring i was like i don't know because you're an idiot i'm an idiot i want to just do this he's like he literally when when an mma fighter and he's your friend comes up and goes you don't what are you doing you don't need to do this maybe you should stop oh you mean i'm 47 yeah okay i think i will well you should go see brian callan and see this idiot in action see at its best. October 16, 17, and 18 at the Atlanta Improv. Can't wait. Yeah, it would be awesome. Do you know who's working with you?

Leo Flowers, a really funny comic coming down to feature for me. And I'm excited. Just go to BrianCallen.com. BrianCallen, B-R-Y-A-N.com. Brian Callen, C-A-L-Y-A-N.com. Brian Callen, B-R-Y-A-N. Callen, C-A-L-L-E-N.com. And I'm at the Tower Theater in Philadelphia, October 17th with Ian Edwards. And I'm at the Warner Theater October 18th with Ian Edwards in Washington, D.C.

That's it. Lots of podcasts this week. I got Honey Honey. Anthony Cumia is going to be here. And Keith Weber as well. The guy from the Kettlebell Cardio Workout that I talk about so much that I love. He'll be here. So until then, enjoy your lives, my friends.

And it's great to be back at Civilization. Big kiss. See you soon. Peace.