The Joe Rogan Experience - #706 - Brendan Schaub & Fight Companion ? (Part 1)
Episode Date: October 9, 2015Brendan Schaub is a mixed martial artist and also a former college & pro football player. He also hosts a podcast with Bryan Callen called "The Fighter & The Kid" available on Spotify. Joe & Brendan a...lso watch fights that take place on October 9, 2015.
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When I'm driving around that Corvette, the Corvette doesn't have a radio.
It's one of the best things I've ever done.
Keep it old school.
Yeah, you know what?
I love that.
Having no radio, when you drive around with no radio, 3, 2, 1, live, boom!
When I was young and I used to deliver newspapers, my car didn't have a radio.
And I used to come up with some of my best shit, like for stand-up comedy material, with
no radio, just driving around doing other things, because i had to fold newspapers up and throw them out the window
i bet man and when you have no radio you're forced to think and when you're forced to think you think
about shit when you're forced to think about shit you go hmm it's like we're constantly distracted
man we want to look at our phone all the time we want to see this podcast today ladies and gentlemen
no laptop i'm trying the new thing, Jamie.
Nice.
No laptop. I'm trying. And then if I got Jamie here, if I need to Google some shit.
Boom. That's what he's here for.
I probably should have tweeted. It's about to start here. I'll tweet it right now. That might help.
That might help a little bit.
But there you are.
Yeah, here I am, distracted.
Distracted.
Distracted.
It's important, man. I mean, in the car, you spend so much time in the car and you listen to music, it's just to pass time.
Exactly.
I'm with you, man.
Well, one thing that's good, though, is podcasts and books on tape.
I do really enjoy doing that.
So I think that, like, having the option is probably better, but the Corvette doesn't have a radio.
I like not having a radio.
I like sometimes just driving around, just being alone with the thoughts,
hearing the rumble of the engine, you know?
If I had that engine, yes.
I agree.
Well, your engine is pretty fucking sweet sounding, too.
Yeah, it's dope, but it's not that Corvette.
That thing sounds so dope.
Well, it's a different kind of thing, but you wouldn't want to live with that every day, either.
You would get annoyed.
Correct.
You'd be like, all right, you're fucking loud.
It'd be like living with a crazy coked up stripper every day.
I was just going to say that.
It's like dating a stripper, man.
It seems fun.
Every now and then, it gets real.
But not just living with her, but she would have to drive you to work.
And everyone sees you.
Look at me.
And she's got tattoos on her neck and she's loud and she smells like cum
this is fun on saturday exhausting it's exhausting yeah like listen lady i'm almost 30 years old i
gotta get my life in order you gotta get out of my fucking life i'm at starbucks i need you
that's what happens when you're when. Like, those things are okay.
But as you get older, you realize, like, this is not fun.
This is just, there's a lot happening.
So I think it's fun when I'm drunk.
You think?
Well, I think it's good for, like, once or twice a week.
Depends on the girl.
True.
It depends.
I thought we were talking about cars.
For the girl, depends on the guy.
We are talking about cars.
We're talking about all things.
All things.
You don't want to watch an action movie every fucking day.
Hell no.
You don't want to watch explosions and fucking missiles.
You want to watch like Step Brothers.
Yeah, man.
You want to watch something fun.
Mix it up.
Mix it up.
Listen, I love ice cream, but I want vanilla every day.
That's right.
Mixing it up is big.
And that's with people, with everything, right?
Everything, man. We were talking about it off the air. People get too comfortable.
They do.
I'm never comfortable.
You know one of the things that's been freaking me out lately? Not freaking me out, but it's been like, I've been like wondering on it.
Like on my message board, sometimes I'll have a guest and then I'll read like after the podcast that like for like, it's almost like half and half sometimes.
I had this guy, Milo Yiannopoulos, on the other day.
Hilarious guy.
He's a gay guy.
He's a blogger, a really funny blogger.
Lives in England, and he was over here from London.
And some people loved the podcast.
Some people fucking hated it.
Worst podcast ever.
This was shit. Oh, my God, this was hilarious. I fucking hated it. Worst podcast ever. This was shit.
Oh, my God.
This was hilarious.
I love that guy.
He's so entertaining.
I want to drown him in a toil pole.
It's like you can't.
That's what you want, though.
Yeah, kind of.
Right?
That's kind of what you want.
As long as they're talking about it, you're good.
You cannot make everyone.
It's not possible to make everyone happy.
The only person who ever made everyone happy was Bill Cosby.
He was the only guy.
I'm not joking.
He was the only guy.
No, he didn't.
You're right, he didn't.
But he was the only guy that for a long time you never heard a goddamn bad thing about.
Nah, those jello commercials piss me off, man.
In that bullshit sweater all the time.
Blacken up.
He was so good
as a comic
and so good
as the host of a show
and the Cosby show
was so well done
that literally
no one spoke ill of him.
And all the while
he's drugging chicks
and raping them.
Dude.
But he might be the only guy.
There's like a few like
Anthony Hopkins you know there's a few actors but no one knows him you know I'm
saying no I feel like we know Bill Cosby or we thought we did thought we did I
feel like Jay Leno's one of those guys in one way most people love Jay Leno
you don't hear a bad thing about you really oh that's so not true my way off
oh yeah you're so off.
What?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Jay Leno?
First of all, I love Jay Leno.
Well, Dave Letterman might hate him.
Not just Dave Letterman, but there was a bunch of fans of Conan O'Brien.
There was a whole situation where Conan took over the Tonight Show.
I remember that.
And then remember Jay Leno had a show before him, and then it became like this crazy thing
where the Tonight Show wasn't doing so well.
Well, this is like Cosby raping bitches.
Before that, before that, before we knew that. people still didn't like them really yeah yeah there was my first of all jobs love Jay Leno yeah my
household love what state was this again yeah Denver Colorado sounds about right
we love us especially pre weed yeah weed hilarious. That was like living on a farm with really good electricity.
That's like being on a ranch somewhere.
Some people that had a satellite dish.
But I think there was a lot of people from the Howard Stern group.
Like for stand-up comics, Jane Leno at one point in time was like one of the top comics in the country.
For sure.
Like real edgy.
Yeah.
Real edgy when he was young.
He would go on David Letterman
and be like this like super edgy guy.
And then for some comics,
it felt like when he started hosting The Tonight Show,
he kind of became more middle America
and became more,
but he did,
it's like it was a calculated move on his part.
Smart move, really?
It was a smart move financially.
He's more corporate, you're saying, right?
Yes.
Kind of sold out.
Oh, 100% corporate.
100% corporate.
When you say sold out, I don't know, because I think people who like what he's doing still think what he's doing is great.
He just found a broader market that maybe might not appeal to younger, more hardcore people.
The way a real sharp guy like Letterman or maybe Conan.
Conan has some of the best writers in all of late night.
I love Conan. Yeah, especially when he in all of late night. I love Conan.
Yeah, especially when he was on the late night show in New York.
My buddy used to work for him.
I got to see one of their very first shows.
You know how we're having this banter back and forth?
Because we're just talking.
We're two friends just shooting the shit.
It would appear that they were doing that,
but behind them there was placards that had every word they were supposed to say.
So their conversations were fake.
What?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
They had a fake conversation.
So they'd be, so I went to the zoo yesterday.
So someone's holding a zoo.
Yep, yep, right behind them.
They had everything was rehearsed and everything was preplanned.
And eventually he got away from that.
And I think in the beginning they were nervous
because he was a writer,
and so he really didn't have a lot of performance experience.
Because he wrote for Saturday Night Live and Simpsons, right?
Is that correct?
I believe so.
I don't know, but I know he was a super respected writer
and a really funny guy.
And the thought was that he was the guy
that was always really funny in the room.
Like when he would meet with executives and writers he was like the funny guy
really strong intelligent funny guy and like this guy should be a host of a
fucking show and then they decided to you know build it up and make it work
but in the beginning they literally it's probably micromanagement on the network
side they're probably just fucking with his show too much they didn't just allow
it they're scared what it is yeah. They're taking a big chance having him there.
So it was weird that their, I don't remember what my original point was,
but their conversation, oh, this is what it was.
Their conversation was written out.
So it was like the writers were really sharp dudes that were trying to,
and then they came up with all these different characters
and reoccurring themes and everything that they would use on the show.
And it became like a real cohesive thing and then when he went to the
Tonight Show they changed the show like all of a sudden he was doing like the
Tonight Show you know it's like the whole thing was different it was
different you gotta do what got you to the dance not only that when they did it
Jay Leno was number one like when they had Jay Leno step out and they put Conan
O'Brien in,
I think they probably,
you know, they have these weird things
where they base it on how old people are.
Like if you're old as fuck,
they don't want you
because old people don't spend any money.
They want those 18, 34-year-old men
who are single.
That's the demographic, yeah.
That's the real money.
The real money is in young dudes
who spend money on stupid shit
and they're probably easily influenced by commercials.
So they just fucking shit.
Shit, I know I am.
I see those KFC commercials.
They fucking go.
But there was also this thing where the Howard Stern show was pissed at him,
and Howard Stern was pissed at Jay Leno because someone,
whoever it was on the Jay Leno writing staff most likely,
was ripping off ideas from the Howard Stern show.
Allegedly.
I've never examined this, but I remember Howard being really pissed about it.
And he's not unreasonable when it comes to stuff like that.
It doesn't make sense.
Howard's a powerful dude, too.
Yeah, I think also, like, sometimes writers do shit like that, man.
That's happened, like, a gang at times with stand-ups.
Writers will come to see you perform, and then they turn your bits into like a part in a sitcom
that happened to kevin james i witnessed it i saw the whole thing it's happened to uh several guys
and a bunch of different shows bummer you know well you know what it is like say if you're a
writer you're a young kid from fucking cleveland and you get a gig writing for the Crystalia show, right?
You got to be funny.
You have some demands.
Yeah.
You got some fucking demands.
And some of these guys will come to comedy clubs, and they'll just pilfer idea.
It's a bad idea, man.
It means you're shitty at your job.
It does.
But it also means you're trying to get by.
Fake it till you make it, Brendan Schaub.
You can't fake it off other people's ideas, though.
I agree. Because eventually you're going to get caught up. I agree. I think a lot of us no longevity and they think they're not gonna get caught up true
They think they're they're just gonna get away with it. Just do it now and then I'm really good
They just don't know it unless Joe Rogan sees that shit
Or anybody now, you know when I when we put out that YouTube video of the Mencia thing
That was a long ass time ago. I just saw that like video of the Mencia thing that was a long-ass time ago
I just saw that like a couple months ago. That shit was awkward as fuck
so awkward
Why'd you get on stage like that?
Well, I was on stage before him. I know you know the whole story coming up right?
He actually wasn't supposed to be on he took the microphone away from the guy who was next the guy who was next to this guy
Kurt Fox he just's Deebo done
Give me the mic
Because I brought him up as a writer cuz Kurt used to write for for Carlos and I said he was a writer for Carlos
Man, Stelia and
So that was it. That was it was a straw that broke the camel's back
But then you jump up there and then he was saying he goes I have the mic
Yeah, what you don't realize dummies. I have the mic, you know, give me a fucking mic and you get the mic Well, it's yeah, dummies, I have the mic. And you're like, give me a fucking mic. And then you get the mic.
And then shut that shit down.
Is he still alive?
Yes, he's alive.
Is he still alive?
Did you have him killed?
No, he's alive.
Did the UFC mafia get to him?
Is he buried somewhere?
Is he dead?
He's out there doing stand-up still.
Is he?
Yeah.
Yeah.
I hope he's doing well.
I hope he's doing well.
I hope he's doing his own shit.
You know?
The problem with those guys are, one of the big problems is when you steal, you don't
learn what it takes to come up with bits.
Like, I got a couple bits right now.
They might die.
I'm looking at them.
They're like bad dogs.
They're like hanging on.
Dogs with broken hips.
I'm like, I'm going to have to put this motherfucker down.
He's a horse with broken legs.
See ya. I'm trying to think if I should motherfucker down. It's a horse with broken legs.
I'm trying to think if I should fix the bit or if I should just tank it.
That's the battle, though, right?
That's what makes you great.
Well, it's the only way to make a bit good.
You've got to bring that motherfucker out to the light of day,
and you've got to tweak it and roll it.
And there's some times that bits just don't seem like they're going to make it.
And sometimes you've got to let them go.
But that's why you're making a living as a comedian.
And then Carlos Mancina is like, fuck, man.
Well, he's still making a living.
He still probably does really well.
You think?
Yeah, yeah.
I mean, he's a name.
You know, he can go to weird spots and do comedy clubs and still probably do pretty good. When you do that, when you steal, you usually steal because there's a different mindset for a plagiarist than there is for someone who's creative.
And I think the mindset of someone who's a plagiarist is the mindset of it's all about me.
It's about me getting this stuff and then I'm going to do it and I'm going to be a bad motherfucker.
It's about me.
Whereas I think the mindset of someone who's more creative is all about whatever the idea is.
And you're just sort of like a train to get the idea to the people.
Well, I think if you're creative, too, you see an idea and you're like, well, you view it from a different filter.
Does that make sense?
Maybe.
I can see people can see an idea and view it from a different filter.
I'm like, I think this is the funny way.
Like this angle might be funnier.
Sometimes.
Yeah.
Sometimes.
I mean, it really depends entirely on the idea.
But I think the big factor, one of the big factors is ego.
And if you have a big ego, it can help you and it can fuck you.
It can do both.
It can help you and it gives you like the courage and the belief in yourself, even if it doesn't make sense to try something that's very difficult. That's huge man. It is big That's huge at our first live show the first eight nine minutes was me by myself
Why?
That was the bit
What's you started it off? Yeah, who told whose idea was this both of ours? Why would you want to do that?
It went awesome, man.
You're talking about egos.
You're talking about egos.
It went great, man.
Well, people loved you. They came there to see you.
Yeah, it went great, man.
So you did stand-up.
Yeah, basically I told a story.
Whoa.
Yeah, and had this whole bit, and people were cracking up.
Dude, you've done stand-up.
Your first stand-up was in front of a live audience.
Sold out, right?
That was a podcast.
Yeah.
That's crazy. Yeah. That's crazy.
Yeah.
That's crazy.
It was awesome, man.
Your first stand-up ever was on the internet.
Yeah.
Whoa.
That's nuts.
We're not releasing it, though.
Oh, you haven't released it?
People want to release it. What?
I'll release my stand-up portion, but we want to make it special for the live fans.
People hate that.
Why would you want to do that? It already was special for them. They probably want to make it special for the live fans. People hate that. Why would you want to do that?
It already was special for them.
They probably want to hear it again.
And then a bunch of other people want to hear it too.
Yeah, so come to the other live shows.
We're doing all these tours.
No, no, no.
You think we should release it live?
Is this your idea or Callan's idea?
Well, probably mine.
Yeah.
I was thinking it was too retarded to be yours.
I thought it was Callan's was I thought it was Callan's
this is my only thing
we've been talking about
right now on here
your idea of Callan's
I honestly think
it's special for those people
because they're live
but they're there live
it's already special for them
they probably want to hear it again
there's probably a lot of people
that were there that said
that was a really good time
I would love to hear that again
on my commute and then there's other people that weren't there
wish you're going to punish them because they couldn't get to bray that's what you're doing
that's what you're doing man you got a recording release the house unless you're thinking about
people gonna jump all over this now i was getting so much heat yeah you should release it a hundred
percent well now i have to don't i yeah well you just should it's good heat. Yeah, you should release it 100%. Well, fuck, now I have to, don't I?
Well, you just should.
It's good.
If it's good, you should release it.
It's great.
Then you should definitely release it.
Why not release it?
Because we're doing a nationwide tour.
Good.
Keep doing that.
I feel like it would bring more people to the actual live events.
No, they're going to come anyway.
Don't worry about it.
Yes.
God, what are you worried about?
There's 350 million people out there.
What you need to do is clone yourselves and have more shows do them in more spots
Yeah
Well, you don't need to worry about is people not showing up at a spot because they heard a live unless the live podcast
Sucks if you come up with a dud you do have that advantage
But if you come up with a dud you can tank it like it for whatever reason just goes awful
it like it for whatever reason just goes awful excuse you know if someone have to roofie you or something before the show they could you never know just start talking I'll tell you what man we
did live questions and usually we filter them some girl you know I've never been on stage
really it's bright as fuck they give the mic some girl she goes uh shop uh do you remember to me do
you remember me i
proposed to you four years ago at the ufc expo and you said yes where the fuck's my ring it's like
what the fuck i'm trying to look like who the fuck is that moving on next question next question uh
brendan what do you think of and it's some ronda rousey question next question oh how much would
reba next question oh yeah It was fun, though.
Mix it up, man.
I get that, though.
So you're involved in a lot of controversial shit.
Not really.
Oh, you mean telling the truth?
Oh, you mean being honest?
Yes.
You mean being honest?
Don't you think that's controversial?
I guess it is for an athlete.
I guess I'm supposed to be this fucking cookie cutter and get in line, and it's just, I don't know.
Well, you just have terrible PR skills, and it turns out it works.
Depends how you look at it.
What is PR, though?
It's public relations.
See, that's where they're wrong, because your public relations skills are awesome, because everybody knows you don't really have a very good filter.
No filter.
Your filter's like a bunch of string in front of a river trying to keep the salmon out.
It's like, you need more than that.
They're going to get through that.
They go over rocks.
You know what I mean?
We got to have more than that, man. It's like a moment of pause where they get to the string and they go, what am I doing here?
Dude, I don't know what to do.
Someone asked me a question.
I'm like, I can't fucking.
Don't worry about it.
You're a good guy.
Yeah, I try.
If you're a good guy, just be yourself.
If you're a good guy and you're telling the truth, I don't see why you wouldn't just keep doing it.
Like, I was training the other day, and this guy came up to me and goes, man, dude, I love what you do.
You know, you give me motivation to do some outside fighting, blah, blah, blah.
But.
He goes, but.
But.
He goes, I wish I could talk about some stuff.
Do it, man.
Oh, he wishes he could do what you do. Yeah, he goes, I wish. That's not really the same kind of but. Yeah, he just goes, I wish. He goes, I stuff. Do it, man. Oh, he wishes he could do what you do.
Yeah, he goes, I wish.
Oh, that's not really the same kind of butt.
Yeah, he just goes, I wish.
He goes, I wish.
I just can't.
Like, why, man?
Well, he might not be able to now.
And the road for him to get to the point where he can is long.
But people always think that they are who they used to be.
Does that make sense?
It's like people look at themselves.
Like, say if you were a loser in high school and you fucked.
There's a lot of people that are haunted by high school for, like, their whole life.
Or certain events.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Certain events.
For sure.
That's why being bullied is so dangerous to some people.
Because if they get really fucked with by people and tormented by people in high school,
that shit can carry over the rest of their life.
It devastates their confidence.
So in their early developmental period, they have this really poor self-image.
And having a poor self-image is fucking super hard to get over.
It's really hard.
Agreed 100%.
Well, you know, I've talked about it before on this.
I have basically body dysmorphia, which is fucking crazy, man,
because I'm in great shape.
And it happened in college.
I had this girlfriend for a long time, and I had this huge event.
I was getting ready to try out for all these NFL teams.
The night before, I was going through all my mental stuff on how I was going to do,
and I put on exactly what I was going to wear.
And it's the, you know, you don't know how to act and eat like a pro,
but I did it for, fuck, four months.
And I was, like, feeling good.
I'm like, damn, dude, I look like feeling good I'm like damn I look like an
NFL guy right now this is how an NFL guy looks right and my girlfriend I go what do you think
how do I look she goes you look a little soft you look you look soft you look kind of chubby
whoa one girl got you got me I was literally like ever since then man wow gave me a fucking
did she did she date some bodybuilders before you or something?
I don't know.
Some dudes who cut weight and eat oats?
I don't know.
I think she was just trying to be honest.
Maybe she didn't have a filter.
I don't know, man.
Maybe that bitch didn't have a filter.
See ya.
Did you look then?
Kicked her to the curb.
Did you immediately for calling you soft?
Shortly after that.
Very shortly after that.
But you were like, what?
Beat it, nerd.
But ever since then
I was like damn and then it fucked up my confidence the next day
That can do that
Yeah, if you let it I think it's like snake venom like you get a little bite Gil will bite every now and then I think
It's good for you. You gotta understand what's happening when someone's insulting you. You gotta understand.
And sometimes they're just being honest with you.
True.
And there's a time for that.
But that was not the time for that.
You had a fucking big audition.
Big tryouts, big games, big event the next day.
Biggest time of my life at the time was a huge event.
And she's telling you soft.
It's tough, man.
That's a mean bitch.
Did you guys have fights before this?
Was she mad about something else?
I mean, I'm sure I was a shitty boyfriend.
Did I have another girlfriend at the time?
Yeah, I did.
Okay, we'll figure it out.
I was a bad guy.
Well, I'm not a bad guy.
I'm in college.
You were young.
We're not going to get married.
Yeah.
Young, dumb, and full of cum.
Yeah.
That's what it is, right?
That's right.
That's why that expression exists.
Yeah, man. When you say young, dumb,? That's why that expression exists. Yeah, man.
When you say young, dumb, and full of...
You never heard young, dumb, and full of comics?
No.
Oh, my God.
That's an old one.
Have you?
Really?
Yeah, Jamie has.
That's old.
He's heard it from me a hundred times.
Yeah, there you go.
It's before Rogan, though?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
For sure, it's not mine.
Wow.
Yeah, I think it was around when I was in high school.
Maybe it's some old school shit.
I think it's some old school shit.
But it's new school, too, Because I've heard it from people recently
If someone had told me that in college or high school
I'm like damn that's aggressive man
Super aggressive
But correct
Jesus Christ
I know right
It's like your goddamn overflow
Yeah
But when you say that
Nobody goes
I don't even understand
Everybody goes yeah
No I get it
Yeah 100% that was me
I was thinking about myself in high school the other day for whatever reason.
You know how sometimes you have this weird moment where you just think, like, wow, what was it like to be, like, if I had to go and do that again, what was it really like?
What are my memories of it, and what was it really like?
Because my memories of it were all, like like always nervous, fucking never confident.
Really?
Always weirded out.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Trying to get away from everybody.
Always just, I was weird.
You were that kid?
I was so weirded.
I was accepted because I fit in like the way I looked fit in.
I looked like an athlete.
But I didn't know anything about sports.
I didn't know no sports.
And all I wanted to do was kickbox.
That's all I wanted to do.
All I wanted to do was taekwondo and kickbox.
That would have been tough back then. I was such a weirdo. That's all I wanted to do. All I wanted to do was taekwondo and kickbox. That would have been tough back then.
I was such a weirdo.
That's all I did all day.
I was always insecure.
Everything but that.
When I did that, I was super confident.
I knew I was really good at that.
So that was one thing I couldn't wait to do
and get the fuck away from people.
What about girls?
I had a couple girlfriends.
I did all right.
I was a good-looking guy.
Yeah.
It wasn't that hard. But I wasn't very good socially.
Not for sure.
Wasn't good at it.
I wasn't really good at that until I calmed down.
I don't think I was even that good socially when I started doing stand-up.
I think I got way better at it because I realized I need to.
One of the things that I was thinking when I first started doing it was like man I
wish that I wish I would just go back to competing because in competing I didn't
need anybody's approval I kind of liked it if you didn't like me I kind of
liked it there's a bunch of people cheering against me I was like just wait
wait to see what I do yeah yeah it doesn't matter to me it's just gonna
give me some more motivation it's gonna give me some more intensity
But with comedy everybody has to like you and then you realize like you're not that likeable
They have to though. Yeah, but like sometimes like things we do like things a person does you do to be successful
But you're not thinking in terms of like being liked
Mm-hmm
Like I always wondered about like guys who are extreme extreme winners guys like Lance Armstrong or guys like Michael Jordan
And they get reputations of being not very good guys or very nice guys or maybe greedy
Like you always hear that about Jordan. He doesn't self selfish selfish
Yeah, man, and you gotta think
Like a guy like that is so focused on this one thing.
He's so focused on winning.
He's so focused on just beating everyone down,
and it's all about him and him getting ahead.
You're so focused on that.
So you're not thinking about how other people are perceiving you
because you're like, fuck them.
I'm coming in there, dunk on their face.
Yeah, man.
Well, that's what greatness requires.
That's what I learned.
Through my journey of athletics, the best players I ever played with,
they weren't the friendliest.
The best fighters who I trained with
or best fighters that I ran with,
God, not the friendliest, man.
But George is. Saint-Pierre?
Saint-Pierre is a super fucking friendly
guy. He's like, with those weird exceptions.
George is super friendly.
Super friendly. I wouldn't say George is the
most out. There's always something. George might be the exception. George is super friendly. Super friendly. I wouldn't say George is the most out. There's always something.
George might be the exception.
George is a very cerebral fighter.
I wouldn't say George isn't the most outgoing guy.
You know what I'm saying?
Like, George is kind of an introverted soul.
He's picked on as a kid and stuff like that.
He's different.
A lot of the super winners, they're just different, man.
And it's something maybe they were born with that or some event in their life happened or something like that.
And they're just these ultra winners.
And I could never relate to it.
I've got to be honest. I wonder if being like that is the only way you become an ultra winner if you just think about the winning only.
You can't be this, like, really social butterfly person that just goes around and
makes friends with everybody. You got to be some driven psycho that's getting up at 430 and running
up hills. Yeah, man. And then you mix that with talent. Now you got fucking the greatness. Yeah.
That's where the greatness comes from, man. Yeah. You know, I had a crazy conversation with BJ Penn
the other night. I just got a text out of the blue from BJ. Called BJ up. And BJ and I were talking about all sorts of shit.
And he was talking to this friend of his who got his black belt in four years.
BJ got his black belt in three and a half years.
Yeah, which was crazy.
Crazy.
So the guy and BJ talking, and BJ goes, wow, that's amazing.
Congratulations.
You must be really talented.
And he goes, no.
He goes, I'm addicted. He goes, I'm addicted to jujitsu, just like you. You were addicted too. And
BJ sat by and goes, I never thought about it that way. And then he goes, I realized,
yeah, I was addicted. That's why I got my black belt in three and a half years. I was
addicted. We were laughing. He was talking about how he's addicted to Final Fantasy.
You ever play that game? I have in like eighth grade.
He plays that shit?
No, at one point in time, though, he got addicted to that game.
But again, that's how these crazy successful people are.
There is no one foot in, one foot out.
It's fucking all in, man, and nothing else matters.
Nothing else matters.
That might be my problem, Joe.
You're too nice.
Um. But on occasionally, like I watched that Crow Cop fight
the other day. You weren't very nice in that fight.
That was not nice. You know.
You were super aggressive in that
fight. I was. You know what's weird, man?
Is like I watched the
uh, the
Alexander and DC fight where it's
back and forth. And I used to get inspired by those right
i used to i used to watch a great fight and as soon as they ended i hit the ground running well
i love to run i just run just that's how i dealt with uh being nervous and what's next for me i
just start fucking running now when i see that stuff I think first about their health.
I'm like, damn, I hope he's okay.
And I felt that change in me, and I'm like, well, that's not good.
Yeah, that's not good.
That's not good.
Don't get me wrong, I still appreciate a great fight.
I fucking love fighting.
I don't miss a fight.
I view it different now.
Instead of thinking that was an amazing fight, amazing fight i think man i hope they're okay
hopefully they're not too injured and what's next after this even if you win the belt all right man
what's after this because i have i've friends who have won belts and you know they're not fucking
killing it these days it seems like like it's one of those things where you just have to
you have to be able to put aside any thoughts of the damage that you're doing to yourself.
You've got to be able to just do it.
And now as soon as you start taking into consideration the damage,
it becomes that extra factor.
It becomes that extra thing that you have to think about, you know,
that can fuck with and also that thing that can fuck with greatness.
I agree.
We were talking about greatness is like this obsession plus talent, dedication, and drive.
But then you add the variable of fear of injury or playing conservative to avoid injury.
I agree.
I think I was obsessed with fighting.
And I think if you ask anyone who trained with me or one of my coaches, man, hardest worker room shop by far I was crazy crazy but then when
it came time to fight that you ever seen the old school RoboCop where he's about to attack someone's
like calculating and it's like fucking 70% gun here that's how my fucking mind works man I don't
know what to do you know I'm saying like my last I'm sitting there, and I'm like, I know here
he throws this. I know he's going to kick here.
So you're thinking too much.
Yeah, I'm thinking too much. I'm too cerebral. I'm thinking
way too much. Well, they're probably not
like that. They're going. They're in the zone.
They're in the zone. They're
fighters. They're going. Yeah.
It's tough, man.
Well, it's one of the most
difficult things, I think for for people
to do is to get in that zone to figure out that that place that you get to where
you're just relying on all of your training and you're just their instincts
that happened to me once once Gabriel Gonzaga really only once only once I
don't know why could Could not tell you why.
Wow.
But I remember that fight, just everything was slow motion.
I didn't hear the crowd.
Everything he threw, I already saw coming.
And it was just like this white noise.
That's the one time I've been in the zone.
Never got in the zone in football, really.
Maybe once.
But fighting, it's a freaking...
To get there, man, is unreal. Well, it's different. It's like if to get there man is unreal well it's
different it's like if you get in the zone with playing ping-pong the loss of
getting in the zone it's it's not dangerous to your health yeah like the
thing about fighting that makes it different than anything else even more
difficult than jiu-jitsu because you just use nerve-racking and when you
watch two guys going at it and they're
trying to kill each other then they're nervous as fuck before that you know but they're not as
worried about injury it's a different kind of injury because the jiu-jitsu injury you might
get choked you might get your arm snapped it is possible you get hurt i mean you could always
embarrassed yeah or you could land wrong fuck your knee up or fuck your neck up. It does happen. It is possible. But MMA or kickboxing, anything along those lines, Muay Thai.
I watched this Muay Thai knockout the other day.
Oh, my God, it was fucking insane.
Some guy from Thailand, I wish I knew who it was
because it was an animated GIF that someone sent me.
And this dude hits this guy.
He's got him in a Thai clinch.
He hits these guys with his fucking ridiculous knees to the body, like three.
Boom, boom, boom.
And they go into the ropes, and the dude hits him with a flying knee
that is just the most perfectly timed flying knee.
Snaps his head back.
His body goes limp, and he just slides against the ropes and down to the ground.
But it was just the poetry of it and the explosiveness of it that just boom, boom, boom,
and he flies through the air, bang, hits him in the flying knee.
Like the fact that that could happen to you.
The fact.
When you get in there with a guy who's training,
I mean, you're just like hoping he doesn't know how to do that.
Yeah, well, especially this day and age.
You know, I was watching the last UFC.
I was watching the last ufc i was watching
the last ufc and that that which is i forget his first name the rodriguez feller yeah yeah
yeah and the north cut i watched north cut i watched yeah you're rodriguez and i'm like what
the fuck well do you know what the difference is what the fuck is going on taekwondo taekwondo
plus but north cut have all the other shit, too. Northcutt was this small.
I did some research on this kid.
He's this small.
His dad has him fucking do all this crazy stuff.
I'm like, that's the future, man.
And then I watched two, you know, I'm not going to say their names,
but I watched two other guys who, you know, we're kind of in the same class.
They're a little older than me.
I watched them fight.
After watching Rodriguez and Northcutt and then watching them them fight I'm like I'm watching I go that's
how I fight man that's what it looked like like you fucking went no throwback
Thursday in the middle of the card you know I'm saying like these guys are just
boxing wrestling right and then you see these young guys and it's like fuck man
yeah yeah did you see that uh what is his name, Magomedov, the Russian dude that fought Sean Jordan?
Yes.
God damn, that guy can throw some fucking kicks.
You see that front leg question mark kick he was hitting him with?
Yes, but it's more of a Taekwondo point scoring.
Like, no one's going to be scared of those.
I fight that guy, it's like, yeah, kicks, cool, great.
Even his punches.
I mean, he's like slapping you All of his pointing, he's moving,
he's moving. He's going to be in trouble when he gets in there
with a killer. Maybe. Not that Jordan's not
a killer, but a guy who can deal
with that and hits for
because that heavyweight,
I was almost a little bit of a point scorer
where I had so much footwork and I'd touch and move, touch
and move. When you get a heavyweight, he's going to, okay,
touch, touch, touch, whack.
Hits like a heavyweight is when you get in trouble being a lighter heavyweight.
Maybe.
What is he, 240?
He's not lighter.
He was 236, I think.
Was he?
That'd be a lighter heavyweight.
Anything on 240, I consider lighter.
Well, what about Kane?
Kane's 240, and he carries a roll of fat on him.
Now, would you say Kane's a knockout artist?
I wouldn't.
I wouldn't say he's a knockout artist, but you wouldn't want to get hit by him.
He's dangerous.
But Kane's also not a guy who stands outside and point, points, moves.
He gets an underhook, puts his head in your chest, and it does work.
Totally true.
Completely different fighter.
Magomedov seems to fight more strategically, avoid damage first,
and then land shots and don't drain your gas tank.
I agree, which is smart at heavyweight.
To a certain point, because then you're going to get a guy
who's not going to play that game.
Well, we'll see.
We'll see what happens to him as he moves up.
We'll see.
What I'm impressed with is his technique, though.
I agree.
His counterpunching was nasty.
That question mark kick does not have a lot of power behind it.
That's a fact.
But the fact that he throws it like that off of his front leg,
for folks who don't know how hard that is to do,
that requires some crazy dexterity.
And to see that from a heavyweight is pretty rare.
For the listeners, most people will know Donald Cerrone for throwing it.
Donald throws it a lot.
He throws it a lot.
But for a heavyweight to do it, it's pretty crazy.
Yeah.
And Donald doesn't throw it that much off his front leg, though.
He can.
He can.
He certainly can.
Yeah, he'll use the back.
But that guy was throwing it like a whip off his front leg. though. He can. He can. He certainly can. But yeah, he'll use the back. But that guy was throwing it like a whip off his front leg.
It was coming up and then swap.
But just there wasn't much behind it.
That'd be my, his footwork, everything, his cardio's great,
counterpunching, dope, everything.
But you're going to hit a heavyweight where they're going to make it count.
Sean Jordan is tough as fuck, man.
He broke his rib in that first round.
He went back to his corner and said, my rib's broken.
You never saw it from his effort.
He never laid back, never put his arm over it, never tried to protect it.
He had to gut it out while that guy was staying on the outside, landing combinations.
Yeah, that main event saved that card for sure.
That main event was amazing.
Those guys like Sage Northcutt, though, and here's another one, Wonderboy Thompson.
Wonderboy is the motherfucker right now.
He's the motherfucker.
Because everybody, like in the beginning, it was about taking him down and grappling with him.
But now that he's been spending so much time with Weidman, he's learning how to grapple,
learning grappling defense correctly.
You're going to see more of what you saw in the Ellenberger fight.
Guys that are forced to stand up with true enjoy that
have a good time we can find a snake can we call him Wonder Man though I think
he's 34 35 like what the fuck is there any way we can change that Wonder Man he
can keep it yeah he keeps wheel kicking people in the head he can keep it does
he have anything coming up? I don't know.
I don't know who he's fighting.
He got surgery.
I know he did that.
The first person to bring him in was Nate Marquardt in Denver.
Nate met him through, I think, a church thing, whatever, how that goes.
So brought him down, and he's just this badass in the gym, but had zero grappling.
But standing with him was a fucking nightmare.
Yeah.
And then Nate told George about him, and then we see Thompson up north, and he starts getting
his grappling in.
And then when he got to the UFC, he was doing well with matchups, and then he got Matt Brown,
right?
Yeah.
That's when he got in trouble.
Yeah, Matt Brown beat him up.
And he also was overtrained for that fight.
He said he came in that fight real flat, and he knew he was in trouble even before Matt
Brown.
He's like not taking anything away from Matt Brown.
He goes, I just could not recover.
It was a back-and-forth fight.
Yeah, back-and-forth.
He survived, though.
He made it to the third round.
He's a beast, man.
That kid's a one to watch for sure.
Now he's so nasty.
I agree.
But what those guys can do, guys like him, guys like Yair and Sage Northcutt, rather,
Sage Northcutt has that front leg kick that he throws.
And it's very unusual because he stands orthodox
and throws his front leg side kick off his left leg.
And it's a really good front leg side kick.
So you've seen his previous fights.
Was he 7-0?
Yeah, 7-0.
So all the previous fights where he got in the UFC.
I haven't seen anything besides.
I've seen a few of his fights.
Okay.
I've been watching him for a while.
I've been hearing about him for a while too.
I've seen a few of his fights.
Okay.
I've been watching him for a while.
I've been hearing about him for a while, too.
But what he's got is an unusual—he's got a very high level of karate and kickboxing and taekwondo.
Very high level of taekwondo skill.
But then also ridiculous athleticism.
He does front flips.
That's what I see out of him. His athleticism is different than most.
He does these front flips and lands on the tips of his toes and gently comes down to his heel.
It's not like a clumsy bounce.
It's like this effortless flip where he knows exactly where the ground is.
Yeah, I stalked his Instagram.
I saw him doing some crazy shit.
Like carrying wheels and shit up sand hills.
He's just a freak, man.
Look at this flip.
I mean, it looks like some moon landing shit that looks fake. He's just a freak, man. Look at this flip. I mean, it looks like it's like some moon landing shit
that looks fake.
He looks like a model, too.
He looks like
What the fuck is going on?
Paige Van Zandt
if she was a boy.
Those two need to procreate.
No, they don't.
Why?
That would be like some Uber race.
Look at how he does that.
That doesn't even seem real.
That literally looks like
someone's got wires
attached to his hip.
That is insane.
Like, if you show this
to Eddie Bravo
and put some chemtrails behind it, he would be absolutely convinced.
Oh, dude, he's going off for an hour for Northcutt and Octopus right now.
But, dude, you know he's a student at Texas A&M?
Oh, my God.
He's talking about dropping out to do fighting full time?
He probably should.
Nah, no way.
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
Oh, you're saying that because of pussy?
Yeah.
Texas A&M?
Johnny Manziel used to run that bitch.
He's fine.
Now it's you, Mr. Northcutt.
I don't think he needs any help.
I think it's probably better if he takes breaks.
Just a break every now and then.
You know, I think he's uber religious.
I don't think he even cares about that.
That's not good.
That'll build up.
Kid needs an outlet.
Yeah, those flips won't be happening like that after a while, man.
Well, a body like that needs to fuck.
You gotta unload that dick. Yeah, you gotta won't be happening like that after a while, man. Well, a body like that needs to fuck. You got to unload that dick.
Yeah, you got to unload that dick.
That dick has to be exercised just like those quads.
100%.
Don't sleep on that dick, Northcutt.
His wrestling's good, too, though.
I mean, he's not like the best in the world at anything,
but altogether it's a nasty package.
He's good at everything, and his athleticism's going to carry him so far.
And he's only 19.
I mean, like, he's going to be so much better in a month.
You know what's a little scary being 19 and being in the UFC already?
Is there, yeah, you can be champion, but let's say he loses three in a row.
Well, that's not what's scary.
What's scary to me is that he is overmatched quickly.
That's what I'm saying.
That's what I'm saying.
We don't know if that even connects.
Look at Michael McDonald.
Michael McDonald, 19 years old, fought Miguel Torres.
Dude, McDonald, before he lost to Uriah Faber and before he lost to Hennepin Barau, was a motherfucker.
Motherfucker.
Motherfucker.
Motherfucker.
Isn't that a perfect example?
It is, but you're-
He can't do what this kid can do with flips and stuff, but Michael McDonald knocks motherfuckers into oblivion with his punches.
Where's Michael McDonald right now? When's the last
time we heard from Michael McDonald? He's been injured.
For how long? Two years? I think he got hurt
pretty bad. I don't know what the injury was. I don't even know
if he discloses it. He was a motherfucker
for a while. I'm just saying
the only thing that scares me is like,
if we reference
boxing, so a 19-year-old's
going to have how many amateur fights?
Fucking 300?
A lot.
Before they get to turn pro, right?
We're seeing Northcutt's amateur career right now with only seven fights.
What the fuck?
Seven fights ain't shit.
So let's say he wins three and he's a star.
Hey, my man.
Or he won two more and you're a star.
Hey, bro, there's nowhere to go. We have to toss you to these monsters.
There's no build-ups for three years.
Trust me.
Yeah, you would know.
That's an interesting point.
That's what's tough about the sport.
Like Paige, right, she's phenomenal.
She looks great, speaks great, she has skills.
Cool, man, let's build this up.
She can be your one 15-pound champ.
But she's won, what, two or three now?
All right. Well, and that women's division is so thin we're gonna have to throw you some well it how about
the she's ranked seventh at the top of the list is a goddamn murderer straight up murder
yawn is a murderer she's a murderer i mean she might she assassinates. Definitely top five best strikers in the UFC, I'd say.
She mercs chicks.
She mercs them.
She does some horrible shit to them.
Straight up.
Yeah.
And so I think, like, when you look at her, all right, before she gets into MMA, she's a six-time world Muay Thai champion.
That's her amateur background.
Exactly.
What she had to learn was just take down defense, defend yourself on the ground, and figure out how to get back up to your feet.
That's what Crow Cop had to learn in Pride.
Yep.
You know?
And I think when you deal with someone like Gennady Golovkin, perfect example, he's had
like a fuckload of amateur boxing fights.
Insane amount.
Insane amount.
He turned pro at like late 20s.
And then he goes into the pros, and these guys just can't fucking compete with him.
Because he's ready.
He's so ready.
He's on such another level.
His technique is so sharp.
And on top of that, he gets just this stupid punching power that everybody's terrified of.
Now, would we see Triple G, the superstar that he is now, if at 19 we said,
all right, you got to go pro.
Boom.
Get it.
That's a good question.
It's tough, right?
But the thing is, it's no one's fault.
That's the infancy of the UFC.
That's just where we're at.
But for someone like Page and Northcutt, like with Northcutt, if I sat down, I'm like, dude, they offer you a top 10 guy?
No, man.
You're good.
I'm telling you, bro.
I called out fucking Brock Lesnar after I beat fucking Gabriel Gonzaga.
You know what I'm saying?
It's like, dude, what?
I wish someone had been like, yo, Shob, chill, man.
This isn't a fucking sprint here.
We got to jog, my man.
The boxing system is like super established.
That's what I'm saying.
It's been around for so long.
It's no one's fault.
But everybody knows how to do it.
Like they know.
Like when a guy gets to a certain level, like Terrence Crawford or something like that,
like you give the guy some tests along the way, but you realize early on,
okay, you're dealing with a really talented guy.
This is what we're going to do.
We're going to slowly build him up with some tougher and tougher fighters,
and we're going to see where he's at.
And we're going to sit down.
That's why trainers like Freddie Roach are so invaluable because they sit down,
they watch as these guys are fighting.
They go, we've got to get him with a guy who's a body puncher.
We need to see what happens.
He gets pressured.
We're going to give him a test in this fight.
And what you're trying to do is you're trying to build your fighter up.
Whereas what happens in MMA, there's no long-term structure
and there's no amateur structure that's comparable to what boxing has.
So it's really hard for people to get built up to the point where they come into the pro
ranks with a very high degree of skill unless they come from a different discipline.
That's why I see wrestlers.
Damian Maia.
Damian Maia, who's fucking smashing people.
I mean, Damian Maia's jiu-jitsu is terrifying.
But what was he?
He was a multiple-time world jiu-jitsu champion.
Jacare. Jacare, same thing murderer muay thai champion six-time world champion
you know i mean across the board there's so many examples johnny hendrix elite wrestler tyron
woodley elite wrestler i mean you can go down the list came alaska daniel cormier elite wrestlers
you look at all the champs ronda rousey judo olymplers. You look at all the champs, Ronda Rousey, Judo, Olympics.
You look at all the champs, they have this extensive amateur background.
And now you get these other guys who don't have that background.
It's such a disadvantage, man.
It's no one's fault.
I'm not pointing any fingers at all.
I'm saying it's an issue in the sport.
It's tough, man, because I was talking with someone, I think with Kenny Floyd,
and I'm like, man, I'd love to see Northcutt get like eight fights in the UFC.
Just murk people and get comfortable.
And we both agreed that that's not going to happen.
Because he wins four in a row.
People are crying for a towel shot.
And a reason for this is because of these freaks, these one percenters that everyone compares everyone to.
And that's like a Ronda Rousey who just comes on the scene murking people, or John Jones.
You're talking about most people aren't like that, man.
Those are the LeBron James of our sport.
Most people in the sport at the championship level are not like John Jones.
That's what I'm saying.
Yeah.
Or Ronda.
They're just not.
They don't have that mental game.
You know what I'm saying?
Yeah, and again, the extensive competition background before you ever get to MMA, I think you become like a champion already.
Like there's only a few guys like Gustafson is a good example.
Gustafson was a good boxer.
You know, he was an amateur boxer, I believe, before he got into MMA.
Correct.
But how much experience did he have in boxing?
How many amateur fights did he have?
I don't think it's extensive.
I don't think, you know, he's like a.
But he's's like a...
But he's obviously like a hair off the champion, you know,
a hair off the Jon Jones fight, a hair off the Cormier fight.
He wins that fifth round.
With Cormier, he's a world champ right now.
I agree, and it's heartbreaking, man.
Yeah.
That fight was super heartbreaking for me.
That fight was crazy.
For Gus Finn, because it's like he lost to Jon,
and now he loses the dc he's
just he's that guy man did you see the picture he posted on his instagram today and i saw you
between almost almost made me tear up i know man me too you know i love that guy yeah he's a great
guy but i love dc too photo i love dc too and that was a great fight but now you got a waiting
yep john jones and i don't know if you've seen his Instagram, but
this motherfucker's motivated.
He was whooping everyone's ass
three weeks of training.
What? Now you're going to take coquina
away from this motherfucker and drugs
and make him lift weights?
And now he's going to do a real camp? What the fuck
do you think is going to happen? He's going to have a hard time
cutting weight. Nah. He'll figure
it out. Nah. he'll figure it out.
What?
Fuck that.
He looked big, didn't he?
Jacked.
Looks like he's getting ready for prison.
Jacked.
Jacked.
Jacked, man.
Yeah, he's the best.
He's the best.
As far as light heavyweights go, for sure.
It's not close, though, Joe.
You know what I'm saying?
I love DC. I fucking love DC. That guy, I love working with him. I mean, it's not close though, Joe, you know what I'm saying? Like I love DC.
I fucking love DC.
That guy,
I love working with him.
I love being around him.
He's greatness at its finest.
And you know,
I have a son on the way.
DC is a guy I can point to and say,
be like DC.
He's a good example.
He's a great dude.
He's done it the right way.
You can't say that about John,
right?
Well,
right now you can't,
but John,
he's a young guy.
He's 27 years old,
right? not that young
but the thing is is with uh with dc he's like he's like he's like the phil mickelson you know
what i'm saying he's like phil mickelson of golf where he's phil mickelson if tiger woods isn't
exactly if tiger woods isn't around we're all fucking wearing phil mix and shoes and shit right
now really yeah man but tiger woods is that motherfucker. He was that 1% better and just beat him every time.
Wow.
Sucks to be Phil.
I know, man.
He's still making bank.
He's still making bank and people love him.
That's the difference between the UFC and golf.
You're not making that John Jones money.
Second place.
You can still have a private jet.
Yeah.
Well, ask Misha Tate how number two is doing behind Ronda.
It ain't fun.
You ain't sipping champagne with Dana White on private jet. Yeah, well, ask Mr. Tate how number two's doing behind Rhonda. It ain't fun. You ain't sipping champagne with Dana White on private jet.
The number two, wearing Nike and shit.
Well, the disparity between number one and number two financially is fucking enormous.
In fighting?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Fuck yes.
It's fucking enormous.
It's like there's no other place where it's bigger.
You know?
Yeah.
I mean, boxing, you could say that a little bit.
Well, not really.
Do you know what I think is the biggest threat to John?
I'd love to hear this.
Rumble.
Oh, I disagree.
See, I think Rumble, if Rumble gets his conditioning together,
and I think Rumble had a real hard time in that Cormier fight,
but the Rumble that you see when you saw him fight Jimmy Manoa,
the Rumble that, like, you're smiling.
Why are you smiling?
I'm smiling because you're like, man, if Rumble fucking got his cardio together, bro,
and fucking got taller and longer, his reach.
No, no, no, I'm not saying that.
You're asking for a lot.
I didn't say that. Because reach didn't help gustafson when he fought gustafson he took gustafson out in the first round
true with a headbutt but the thing is oh no i love rumble don't get me wrong they definitely
did clash heads but i think his head got hit too i'll tell you what exactly what happens if john
fights rumble what happens john takes him down wears his ass out and breaks him in the second
round probably submits him with tk's him Wow that's how good John
is man and everyone's like oh Shobbs or John Jones nut hugger nah man he's very
good I don't know what to tell you it's better than very good very good it's not
even a good description I agree he's he's by far the best like there we have
everyone and then we have John that's how fucking good this guy is that's how
bad he's beaten people.
What if John had the kind of technique that Mighty Mouse has?
Fuck.
We're all fucked.
The kind of technique and footwork.
We're going to have to do like a rumble match, like two on one. What if in all this time off, John Jones comes out and he starts fighting like TJ Dillashaw?
Oh, my God.
What?
What?
Oh, okay.
What do you think about this TJ Dillashaw thing?
TJ Dillashaw moved camps to Elevation, Team Elevation in Colorado, and Uriah is understandably upset.
I knew this for weeks because he moved to my head coach, my old head coach.
Oh, really?
Yeah, but I couldn't say anything. I don't want to break the news. I'm not fucking Ariel Helani.
Someone's coming with cash? Is that what it is?
Yeah, Muscle Farm Gym is paying the UFC fighters now.
Ooh.
And so, yeah, TJ's going there.
And I'll tell you what it does do.
You ready for this one?
It sets up Uriah TJ.
Talk about a fucking countdown.
What?
Yeah.
Reebok kits for everybody.
What?
You imagine that fight?
Do you think they would do that?
100%. They agreed they would do that? 100%.
They agreed they would fight each other.
And now even more.
Wow.
Yeah, they've said previously they would be down for it.
So what is the Muscle Farm deal?
Is it some dude with oil money or something?
I don't know what those Muscle Farm deals are.
Some guy owns a diamond factory somewhere?
I don't know.
Well, I think what they're going to do is because they can't really be in the UFC anymore,
so they came up with this plan.
We're like, all right, we'll sponsor fighters, so we'll get get all their Instagram and social media and we can put our brand on them that way
Oh really yeah, because since Reebok came right like that's pretty smart. It's smart. It's actually pretty smart
I don't know how much they're paying them if it's smart
but we make smart to get their social media because I always thought about this because
Let's say you give me whatever 10 grand to wear a t-shirt for one night for 30 seconds
Or you can sponsor for the year and all my fucking social media training, I'm rocking your shit.
You can get way more coverage, man.
Well, you can today, too, especially with a guy like TJ that's super popular or someone like Rhonda or, you know, anyone who's like very popular on social media.
True.
You gotta be social media savvy, though.
A lot of guys aren't.
Or you gotta have someone that works with you and for you, like a manager or something
like that and knows how to do that shit.
I used to hire a photographer, Eric Williams, a beast photographer.
And he'd come to my train camps and he'd take all these pictures and send them to me at
night so I could post them throughout the week.
But you would post them all yourself?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Some people post all their shit themselves and some people, like some athletes and even
some musicians, you see like post but posted by team
cruise yeah like tom cruise has like a team that posts it's kind of lame though isn't it it's very
lame like i think it's dope that social media allows people access to that they normally wouldn't
have yeah that's what it's supposed to be all about the personal interaction like whatever i'm not
saying dick pics but you know what i'm saying That's what it's supposed to be all about.
It's supposed to be all about, like, if you get a tweet from me,
unless it's from a YouTube video, like the YouTube videos,
when they get uploaded, they automatically generate a tweet.
Yeah.
But that's just the title of the YouTube video.
There's no opinion in that or anything like that.
If you get opinions or, hey, this movie was fucking awesome,
I ate at this place, it tasted great.
That's you.
That's all me. That's Joe Rogan. 100 all me 100 i don't let anybody else do that dude i had my manager one time i forget which fight it was like oh i'll tweet live for you during your fight i'm like get the
fuck out of here imagine what are you crazy gross shit he would say one eye no hell no
what i was doing a show they wanted to take uh my social media
uh sci-fi wanted to
Take over my social media
You're batshit crazy
I would never do that
I was like
You gotta be
You gotta be on drugs
I didn't let my girl
Fucking see my social media
What?
I'm not giving anyone my phone
Arsenio Hall
Was at the
Ice House one night
And I was talking to him
It was after a show
You know he did the
Arsenio Hall reboot
And after they did it
For a while Yeah it's over now It it for a while, it didn't work.
Or it didn't work out or whatever.
He's having fun.
He doesn't give a shit.
But he was like, I can't get my fucking Facebook back.
He's like, they have my Facebook.
And I go, well, you can't get it back?
He's like, well, I had to give it to them when I had to give control of my social media.
Oh, you fucked up.
Yeah.
You had to do that.
Well, Kevin Hart was talking about this, how movies now tell them, like,
hey, man, we need you to tweet out or Instagram the movie.
He's like, that's not in the contract.
If you want that, you got to write that in.
That's extra money, man.
This is a completely different machine.
I'm doing the movie.
You're paying me for my talents.
If you want me to promote on social media that I've built myself over the years,
you're going to have to write this into the contract.
That's interesting because I would think that if he did something that he enjoyed, he would
want people to see it.
So he would use his social media.
I think he's looking at like a business though.
I get it 100%.
I get it 100%.
I do, but I also think like at his level, he must be making so much fucking money that
like to say, I want more money to use my social media presence.
Like what the social media presence is really just going to do is alert his more money to use my social media presence. Like what the social
media presence is really just going to do is alert his fans to some movie that he's doing, which is
good. Sometimes you gotta be careful with social media. And this is just me, right? To compare it
to Kevin Hart. I'm not shit. I'm a grain of sand. But when a company comes to me and goes, whatever,
we don't work with the fire and the kid. I'm like, cool. Well, the deals with me and Brian and like,
yeah, but we want your social media.
To have me post this stuff?
Listen, man, fans, they hate that shit.
Yeah, they don't.
It's a motherfucker, man.
They always want to figure out some way to weasel in.
Always.
Some way.
Always.
There's got to be a way to get in here.
You know what?
A lot of things, a lot of people are experiencing this.
They're getting courted by these networks.
There'll be a network, like a podcast network will come to them are experiencing this they're getting courted by these networks like there'll
be a network like a podcast network will come to them and want to take a piece of
the action and get in return they would provide them with a certain amount of
commercials like really they're not providing anything but what they're doing
is they're saying by saying you know hey we'll provide you with some commercials
we'll give you some commercial revenue but by saying that what they're really doing is they're trying to figure out a way where
they can make money off of what you're doing where you're doing it completely
independently like right now what you're doing is you're taking your stuff and
you're just putting it online now you got to figure out that somehow some way
someone is eventually gonna figure out how to advertise that.
So what they're doing is they're seeing like, this guy's missing out on some money. What I'm going to do is I'm going to move in here and I'm going to take some of his,
I'm going to give him some money, but I'm going to take some of his money where it doesn't
make any sense that I would make that money.
Yeah, man.
They're giving away 50% in some of these cases.
With adjoining podcast networks, the network's asking for 50%.
And I know people have done this.
It's like, what are you thinking, man?
It's crazy.
Don't give anyone 50%.
But if you had a radio show, that makes sense.
Say if you were on CBS radio, whatever, just for a name to use, right?
And you had some sports radio show, and they said,
listen, we're going to syndicate your show.
We're going to bring your show across the country, and this is what we want.
We're going to get advertisers in.
We're going to give you 50% of the ad revenue, but you're going to make a lot of money.
You'd be like, well, okay, that sounds pretty good.
It sounds like a good deal.
But really, there's no channels that people automatically go to.
What people do is they download podcasts that they like, whether it's Radio Lab or The Fighter and the Kid or The Church of What's Happening Now.
They go to what they like, and then they get it.
Like the idea that you're just going to tune into a dial, 6.40 a.m., it's the ghost.
You know what I mean?
The ghost morning show.
You know what I mean?
That is like you have a distinct location that people are accustomed to going to.
They're going to go there.
Yeah.
It's like if you want ad space on Santa Monica Boulevard.
Well, you know Santa Monica Boulevard is a well-traveled area.
If you put up a billboard up there, it kind of makes sense you have to pay a lot of money.
Yeah.
But if someone says, dude, I got this billboard.
It's in a little fucking desert.
I want a lot of money.
I want a lot of money.
I want a fuckload of money.
I want half of what you made.
I need 50%.
I'm going to put this billboard up.
Well, can other people get to that billboard?
Yes.
They just have to get in their car, and they have to drive out to the desert.
Now, about the money.
Me and Callan had a serious discussion because, you know, with the show.
No glory link yet?
No glory, huh?
We're trying to find it.
We're supposed to get a link.
With the podcast doing better, you know, we're getting more sponsors, advertising, stuff like that.
And we had a major corporate sponsor come to us.
Now, I fancy myself, when I was younger, a couple of these products, especially with cheese and ketchup only.
I loved them, man.
I don't promote it now, but I could buy a lot with it.
You know what I'm saying?
But Calum was like, absolutely not, man.
He's like, I would never tell people to buy this stuff.
Yeah.
You can't tell people to buy that.
You can't.
You can't.
Because it's different.
After talking to Cal and I ran some stuff by you, it's just like, you can't do that, man.
You can't.
Unless you love it.
Like, if In-N-Out Burger came to me and they wanted to offer a sponsorship, I might have
to fucking say yes.
I'll tell you right now.
Chick-fil-A comes to me.
What? Chick-fil-A?
They hate gay people. Do you know that?
Hey man, I'm just trying to get a
chicken sandwich. I'm just trying to get a chicken
sandwich, bro. Listen, they hate gay people.
Do they? Yeah. Jamie's like,
not anymore. It's like as if
the PR push worked.
It only worked on Jamie.
Jamie's the only one. Like, not anymore. He interrupts
the podcast. Like, not anymore He interrupts the podcast Like not anymore
Not anymore
Not anymore
You don't even know
That's why
That's why
Damn so I can't eat Chick-fil-A anymore
That's great
That's why those
God damn promos work
That's why those
They got me
And Jamie
Those publicists
I'll fucking take a chicken sandwich right now
No they're very rude about the gay people
They spend money to try to stop
Gay marriages like that
Really
Oh fuck
Yeah it's been a
big thing. That chicken is so delicious.
You've ruined my night. It doesn't matter. You can still eat it.
It doesn't matter in the long run. I like gay people, though.
Just because you have stupid opinions doesn't mean you shouldn't
be allowed to make money. True.
The problem is when they're using those stupid opinions,
see, they're super religious,
and that's one of the things. Religious people,
they don't freak out about some
things that are in the Bible like you very rarely see
religious people protesting against tattoos
But in the Bible, it's very clearly says don't get tattoos. We're both fucked
We're both fucked all super what's hilarious is there's a lot of people that are super religious that fucking tattoo religious shit on their body
You're not supposed to do that like there's other stuff
You're not supposed to like if you go Old Testament, you're not supposed to do that. Like there's other stuff you're not supposed to, like, if you
go old Testament, you're not supposed to be eating pork. You know, you're not supposed to be like
an animal, a split hoof that choose its own cut. Like there's like, you have rules, like what
you're supposed to eat and what you're not allowed to eat. And there's a lot of people that break
those rules. There's a bunch of rules about divorce and there's rules about property. And
there's rules that people break in the Bible all the time But for whatever reason with really religious folks that gay rule is the rule that they want enforced
I think they give a fuck. It's weird. It's weird like my good friend Joe Rogan said
Maybe they're worried that dicks taste delicious. Yeah, they're fighting off the gay for sure the summer
Vampire putting garlic around their neck and shit.
It's also, I think they think of gay,
this is my amateur psychologist opinion.
Love to hear it.
I think some people think of gay
as being decadent and indulgent
and that this will lead to slovenly behavior
and too much partying and fucking and
guys sucking each other off and coming each other this is not conducive to a good well-oiled
society like well-oiled society needs people to be buttoned down and conservative that's why
conservative people they tend to dress with like suits and ties they tend to let you know like look
we're gonna follow i'm i'm down with this agenda okay god guns country i'm uh i have listening country music i got a second
amendment like there's there's so cookie cutter in the way they think that it's somewhere along
the line like god there's so many people that think along the same way what is well this is an
adoption of an ideology they're adopting a way to think. They're adopting this hard-working,
American, blue-collar, conservative, religious, God bless America. Put your hands over your heart.
Let's all join in in prayer. God bless America. Don't you think they're doing that so they don't
have to think for themselves? There's a little of that. Yeah. There's a little of that. And there's also you're subscribing to this ideology that would most likely, what you believe is it will most likely prevent people from acting crazy and doing stupid shit because they're going to follow God's rules.
So it would be easier to raise kids.
Like it would be easier to have a family and just bring them to church on Sunday and say hello to the Wilsons.
And everybody talks fake.
You're all talking like you're strip club DJs.
Hello, Mr. Wilson.
Look, you got a nice new sedan there, Mr. Wilson.
Jimmy, come on down.
Listen, man, people are looking at it all wrong.
I mean, the more gay dudes, the better.
More chicks for me, man.
Yeah, that's what I'm saying.
Yeah, that's what I'm saying.
Fuck it.
I think there's that and there's also, like, there's shit that I don't like. I don't like what I'm saying. Fuck it. There's that, and there's also this shit that I don't
like. I don't like discrimination.
I don't like it. I don't like any discrimination.
It drives me nuts. I agree 100%.
But in both ways, though, too.
I saw today there was a Seattle
yoga place that will
not accept white men.
Or white people or white men.
I tweeted it earlier today.
There's some Seattle.
Yoga's white as fuck.
Do you hate money?
Who is this?
I'll pull it up on my Twitter.
When's the last time you went to a yoga class like, damn, there's a lot of black people in there?
Well, it's not that common, I don't think.
I don't think so.
Some of the black folks enjoy the yoga.
They might.
I'm saying in general, if you want to make money, for sure don't kick out white people.
I think that's their point.
I think they wanted something that's theirs.
But to say that white people can't come, like, God damn it, you're missing the boat.
Yeah, you fucked up, son.
It just doesn't seem to make any sense.
Someone fucked you on your business plan.
Well, no whites allowed.
It's the whites.
Yeah, they only want people of color.
They want to exclude Caucasians.
This is in Seattle?
Yes.
Kurt Cobain land?
You're fucking up, man.
Yeah.
A lot of white people up there.
A lot of white people?
It's tough.
Well, you know, some people think that supporting black people is not racist.
That just supporting, universally supporting black people is not racist
because black people have been oppressed,
and what you're doing is you're giving them a place
where they can join in a community and feel like they belong
because they feel ostracized from the rest of the world,
especially in Seattle where everybody's white.
The problem with that kind of thinking is it's still the same thing.
We're saying white people can't come in.
It's still the same thing as saying black people can't come in.
Man, that's racist.
It's racist.
Towards white people.
Yeah, it's just racist.
You know what?
Just make your fucking yoga place just super inviting to blacks.
Make it awesome.
Just make it awesome to everybody.
And if you want more black people to do it because you identify with those black people,
reach out to them.
But to say that white people can't come to your yoga class, that seems crazy.
It's the worst idea.
Why would you not like people based on how much melanin they carry in their skin or their ethnic origin of their grandparents it's fucking stupid
it's fucking stupid so stupid if you're white stupid if you're black stupid if you're asian
it's stupid you're ignorant yeah so what religion is chick-fil-a this is christian
fucking a yeah that is heartbreaking yeah fuck you there's a bunch of Chick-fil-A stuff online.
Like, there's people that were boycotting them and shit.
That's crazy, man.
You know, I had a cousin who was basically beat to death because he was gay.
Whoa.
Yeah, man.
So it's super touch for me.
So no more Chick-fil-A for me, even though I love that fucking chicken sandwich.
Yeah, see, that's fucking crazy.
He was on a bus.
He was on a bus, and he was very flamboyant.
And they jumped him and basically beat him to a pulp,
and he went home and died later.
Crazy, right?
Jesus Christ.
Bummer, man.
Didn't mean to fuck up the flow of the podcast.
Jesus Christ.
Where was this?
Where did this happen?
Denver.
Denver.
He was on a public transportation bus. Oh, my God was this? Where'd this happen? Denver. Denver. It was on a public
transportation bus.
Oh my God.
Yeah, a bunch of dudes
jumped him.
They didn't find out
who it was?
Yeah, they did catch him.
Wow.
What happened to them?
I'm not sure.
I remember I was in
college at the time.
My dad telling me,
I was like, what?
Fuck.
And I remember,
when I was younger,
me and my brother
were pretty close to him,
him and his brother Nathan.
And then, you know, you do shit and you just fall out of touch.
But I remember my dad telling me, I'm like, what the fuck?
I remember being mad that I couldn't help him.
It's weird, right?
The idea that someone would want to just hit someone because they're flamboyant, because they're gay.
What? I know. What the fuck is wrong with people?
It's the way they were raised.
It's 100% what it is. It's the way they were raised. It's 100% what it is.
It's the way they were raised.
It's 100%.
If you were raised in a community that didn't give a shit,
that would be, like, no big deal.
Like, if, okay, let's just say us,
like all of us in this room, like you, me, and Jamie,
if we had our own little community
and one of us had a kid
and another one of us had a kid and another was another one of us had a kid and
we found out jamie's kid is gay do you think you would want your kid to beat up jamie's kid
would you would you say you got to kick their ass would you promote that kind of thinking
but never way no way it would never happen it wouldn't be possible but when you get enough
fucking idiots in a city and you get enough really narrow-minded bigoted people that have
these shitty ideas about other people's sexual
Orientations or the way they choose to wear their clothes or whether they choose to be goth or whether there's anything whatever it is
If it doesn't it doesn't affect you is it poisoning your pool?
I know are they killing yours your vegetables in your garden like what's going on with you're upset and
You're raising people to have this fear of it,
and then they're interacting with other people at school,
and they all have this fear of it,
and they all want to let everybody know that they're not like that.
And one of the best ways to let people know that you're not like that
is to attack people who are like that.
It's crazy, man.
Think about we had a transgender person on our show, Caitlin Beck,
and she was saying that.
Kristen Beck.
Kristen Beck.
Good.
Save my man. Kristen Beck. Kristen Beck, good. Save my man.
Kristen Beck.
And she was saying she was walking down the road
and just a group of five guys came from behind
and beat the shit out of her.
She said it happens all the time.
Transgender, it happens all, it's their number one concern.
Walking down the road getting beat up.
And she was a Navy SEAL.
She was a Navy SEAL and gets her ass whooped.
That's a crazy situation, man, to be a Navy SEAL. She was a Navy SEAL and gets her ass whooped. That's a crazy situation, man, to be a Navy SEAL, full beard, badass, American killer out there.
I think it proves that they're wired like that.
You know what I'm saying?
Like no one chooses like, oh, I want to take all this on.
Especially today's society.
What?
Yeah, I want to take all this on.
I want to be gay and have people criticize me
and all this shit.
Some people are certainly wired that way.
I think some are, yes, and I think some choose,
but I think a lot of people are born that way.
And you know what?
Here's the other thing, though.
The people that do choose, that's their choice.
I agree.
Have fun, man.
Yeah, they're allowed to have that choice.
Get weird.
Yeah.
It's like if you want to be Debbie now, that's cool.
You know, whoever the fuck you want to be,
I don't give a shit.
Again, same thing. If it doesn't affect me, if it you want to be, I don't give a shit. Again, same thing.
If it doesn't affect me, if it doesn't affect me, I don't really care.
I agree 100%.
The people that do care, though, they're scary.
They're scary to those folks, to someone that's transgender or someone that's flamboyant or black.
You're in the wrong place.
You're black or white.
If you're in the wrong place, you're white.
There's people that will beat the fuck out of you because they feel like you got a fucking easy hand
because you were raised white.
The world is crazy, man.
There's bad people in almost every single demographic.
You're going to find people that, for whatever reason,
they got to where you are in a fucked up way.
Bro, curveball, not to change subject,
but you think fucking humans are a motherfucker?
Watch National Geographic for a little bit.
Oh, yeah.
Mother Nature is a motherfucker.
Yeah.
To another level, man.
Oh, yeah, dude.
Is this live?
We got it?
Yeah, I have it.
It's done now, so we can start over.
The whole thing's done?
Yeah.
The entire event?
They're getting ready to start it back up at 8 o'clock Pacific time.
For Cali?
West Coast? Yeah, we can go back and watch this on DVR. Well, let's watch it now. So we can start They're getting ready to start it back up at 8 o'clock Pacific time. For Cali? West Coast?
Yeah, we can go back and watch this on DVR.
Well, let's watch it now.
So we can start it whenever you want.
Bring it.
Bring it.
So Joe Schilling already fought?
Yeah, the whole thing's done.
Wow, that's crazy.
It's not even 8 o'clock.
Yeah, it's like a four-hour event.
But Denver.
It's in Denver.
That's weird.
They're only an hour.
Okay.
Well, let's see it.
I should probably start with the main card, though, right?
Or do you want to watch the whole four hours?
Yeah.
Well, we can do whatever the fuck we want now.
We got power, Jamie.
Yeah, dog.
Glory Kickboxing.
This podcast is going to morph into a fight companion because my good friend Joe Schilling is fighting on that card.
And he's in the main event against Jason Willness, who's a bad motherfucker from Holland.
Two really, really good kickboxers
in both world championship level.
Joe Schilling, of course, he's been world champion.
He beat Artem Levin, who's the current Glory world champion.
He won that fucking crazy four-man tournament.
Crazy.
Artem Levin, man, those guys, they had to fight,
was it three times or four times in a day?
Three times, right?
Three times.
Horrible kickboxing fights.
He had some rough fights.
Oh, yeah, man.
The first one with Simon Marcus, where it went to the fourth round.
They had three rounds.
They were a draw, so they went to a fourth round,
and Schilling knocked him out in the fourth round. It had three rounds. They were a draw, so they went to a fourth round, and Schilling knocked him out in the fourth round.
It was fucking crazy.
That was round one.
Can we get some volume, Jamie?
I don't think Gloria will be mad.
Where do you want me to start?
This is one of the early ones.
This is just the whole four-hour event. I've got to figure out
where the event starts.
Jesus Christ, that's a lot of kids.
Let's get this screen over here.
Give us the data of who, oh, that's, is that?
You can't do that with this.
You can't?
I'm using the computer for the video.
Oh, that's right.
It's a lot.
You're going to eat in 20 minutes.
Oh, yeah, because we're on a link.
Kevin Von Nostrand.
A lot of Denver boys on this card being in Denver.
This is a tough place to fight.
Denver can be tricky.
When you're, well, not like Mexico City.
Mexico City is the trickiest of tricky.
That's why it's going to be interesting to see
the Cain Velasquez-Verdun rematch.
In Brazil? Yeah.
Are they going to do it in Brazil? I don't think that's confirmed.
Is that confirmed? I'm pretty sure it's confirmed.
I feel like you would know better than me.
Well, I don't think it is, honestly.
I feel like it is.
I talked to Javier Melendez.
How long ago?
Javier Melendez the other day.
Okay.
It's a couple days ago.
Man, I thought I was in Brazil.
I hear Mauro Ranallo.
I like his commentary on these events.
He's great.
He's gotten so good from doing Showtime, boxing, doing the Floyd Mayweather fights.
He's really, really good. He's excellent. good from doing Showtime, boxing, doing the Floyd Mayweather fights. He's really, really good.
He's excellent.
I love the Showtime crew.
Yeah.
This feller with the tattoo on his back trained with us in Denver at Grudge, J-Ho.
I like that tattoo.
That's dope.
It's American as fuck, son.
Super American.
Got a goddamn John American flag on his back.
You were talking about nature, being a motherfucker, watching the nature show.
Bro, oh my God, I had to turn it off, man.
I don't do well seeing animals die.
That's some horrible shit.
Horrible shit, man.
Yeah.
I saw this mountain goat getting chased by a snow leopard.
Snow leopard chased him all the way down the cliff, grabbed him by the ass, about to eat him anus first.
He got away.
Instead of dealing with death in the
fucking snow leopard full just jumped in the river died commit suicide baby deer
just born and this fucking wild pack of dogs is coming the mom pieces out this
baby deer can barely stand eight done it's intense yeah nature does not fuck
around more than half of all the moose and deer that get killed in Canada,
they get killed right after they're born by bears.
Dude, I was depressed as fuck.
Wolves, coyotes, shit like that, right after they're born.
You know, that's a big thing, too, about grain.
You know, a lot of people think that they want to live a life
where they're not involved in any death and uh
that's that's noble you know you don't want to cause any animal suffering i get it i totally
understand that idea even though i hunt and even though i eat meat i totally get why they feel like
that but there's a reality to commercial grain and one of the realities commercial grain is you
know those those things the combines those things that they turn up there they cut the wheat with
those things are indiscriminate.
They kill everything that's on the ground.
For sure.
They kill rabbits, and they kill a lot of fawns, too, because fawns, when they're young, when they're newborn, what they like to do is stay put.
So if there's anything coming, what they do is they just stay put, and they kind of hide, and they get ground up by the combines.
It's super common.
Rabbits, rodents, ground-nesting birds, all of them get ground up in those things.
There's almost no way, unless you're growing your own food
and you're growing your own vegetables,
and you're there for the whole process, you make your own compost,
there's almost no way to leave no footprint.
How about that elk you shot you just posted today?
What's the deal with that thing?
I shot it Wednesday morning.
5,000 pounds?
1,000 pounds? Enormous. It's a big animal.
Literally a giant animal. I'll show you another picture
that's even more crazy of it.
What'd you shoot him with? A bazooka? A bow and arrow.
Straight bow and arrow?
Yeah, man. A lot of work
went into that. A lot of skill with a bow and arrow.
Yeah, that for sure. I respect bow and arrow more.
Well, it's a lot of dangers. Look at that. A lot of skill with a bow and arrow. Yeah, that for sure. I respect bow and arrow more. Well, it's a lot of dangerous.
It's come from a guy who's never shot a gun.
Look at that.
You get a look at how big it is.
God damn, it's huge.
Hanging off of a tree when we're cleaning it, you kind of get a sense of how big it really is.
That's how we got it into a truck, too.
He's huge.
Yeah.
He's probably...
It's a 1,000-pound animal.
It's enormous.
And they get bigger.
There's some of them, like 1,200, even 1,400 pounds.
They're really enormous ones, especially at Tohon Ranch.
And by the way, they're not even the biggest.
Moose are even bigger than them.
Moose are giant, dude.
There's moose in the Yukon that are 1,800 pounds.
Dude, that thing is fucking huge.
Imagine something twice as big as that.
That's a moose in the Yukon.
Literally twice as big.
Then what do you guys hang it?
Then you and your friend they had it well first you you back the truck to it and then they put it into the back of a
pickup truck and then we took it to a cooler like a walk-in cooler and then
then the real work begins start ordering it and taking pieces off of it and you
brought it home brought most of it home.
Some of it is at a butcher shop that's getting turned into sausages and shit.
And when you shoot it. Want some elk sausage?
Yeah, I'm down with some elk sausage.
High protein, son.
Might wake up in the middle of the night with predator dreams, though.
I'm not mad about that.
When you shoot a thing like that, how long does it take for it to die?
That was pretty instant.
It was a perfect scenario.
It was dead within a minute.
But, you know, that's one of the things about the discipline of getting better at dealing with the nerves,
getting better at aiming, making sure your archery skills are on point,
or your rifle skills, for that matter.
Like, rifle, you could injure an animal rifle hunting, rifle hunting too super super important that you work really hard on it it's also just so fucking nerve-wracking
really oh my god well this is my thing though with that fucking giant elk if let's say you
nick it you miss or whatever it heads your way it's your ass really yeah you're fucked and now
it decides to oh yeah i'll slap that shit up. Oh, you think you will.
Do you see the antlers?
I did see the antlers.
Dude, it's a tree.
It's got a tree growing out of it. I'll go behind a tree, bro.
I don't get why it's so tough.
If you could go behind a tree, you could pull it off.
Just keep going around the tree, old school stuff.
If you got stuck in an open area for some reason, he got to you first.
You're getting fucked up.
You're getting fucked up.
It happens.
It's not that common because they're usually scared
of people. They try to get the fuck away from you.
Where it really happens is more with bears.
With bears, it can really happen
for sure. And moose, right? Aren't moose aggressive as
shit? Well, they're definitely aggressive if you
wound them. Rinella,
Steve Rinella, my friend from that show Meat Eater,
he got run over by a fucking moose
on his show dude it was
crazy he told me about it after the fact and I watched it on tv like the way he described it
it sounded crazy but then watching it you're like oh my god he shot the moose the moose went down he
thought the moose was dead came up on it and then the moose got up and he went oh shit he's alive
and he went to shoot him again and the the gun misfired, which is so rare.
It's so rare that you pull the trigger and nothing happens.
So he had to rechamber another round.
And in the process, this moose comes behind him and sends him flying.
And there was blood on him, and he couldn't figure out if it was his blood or the moose's blood.
He's like, he's feeling his body to see if he's been punctured.
And he got nailed by a big-ass animal. One for the moose. One one for the moose so did the moose get away? No of course no no no no
My buddy Ryan was there Ryan Callahan put a bullet into him what happened we lose our feed
Yeah, let's move ahead anyway
But um so, you know, just nature being dangerous, nature being ruthless.
We're so insulated from it.
That's why people have these beautiful ideas of what animals are
and how people fit into the food chain.
We're so used to getting our dirty work done for us.
This is true.
You got to bring me sometime, man.
Oh, I got you.
You want to come?
I'm sending Everlast out.
Everlast, he's totally unrelated.
He didn't even know that I got back from hunting.
And he sent me a text saying that he wants to hunt
and he wants to find someone that will take him through it.
And so I set him up with this guy, Brian Meadows,
who was my guide this past weekend or one of my guides.
And he's one of the guys that works there.
There's, like, a bunch of, like, really good guides that work at this one ranch.
And he's going to do, like, a thing with him where he takes him out,
shows him how to shoot, shows him how to, you know, slide in the rifle, and then they're going to go hunt pigs.
How long is this?
Pigs?
A couple days, yeah.
Fuck, man.
What, you don't like pigs?
I want something a little more danger, you know what I'm saying?
You ever see a wild boar before?
Yeah.
Dude, they have wild boars on this ranch.
In Texas?
Tusks, no, in Tohon Ranch.
It's up north.
North of here, like an hour and a half.
Not far at all.
They have some photos.
I'll show you some after the show.
Yeah.
I just need to be a little scared.
You know what I'm saying?
Otherwise, it's not fun.
Wild boars sound like monsters.
We were there.
The first time I was ever there, we were passing by this really thick,
these thick grasses, like high, tall grasses, like weeds and grasses.
It was like four or five feet tall.
You couldn't see inside of it, but you knew there were pigs in there.
And so we're walking down this dirt road really slow and quiet.
So they don't even know we're there.
And we hear them fighting.
Like, wah, wah, wah, wah.
It sounds like there's demons in there tearing each other apart.
They're fighting for some reason.
Wah, wah, wah, wah.
They're making all these crazy boar noises.
I was freaked out, dude. I was
definitely freaked out by wild boars.
Did you see that
movie, that TV show Game of Thrones?
Yeah. The fucking king got killed by a wild boar.
Giant boar. That's how he got him. I've seen like
one Game of Thrones. Oh, damn. That dude just got
dropped. Another Denver kid.
We don't even know who's fighting. Who's the guy in the orange
trunks? That's the Denver kid yeah I know his name though train this is
over yeah damn my kids good little hairy armpits though huh yeah I guess trim
those up man that's old school I like that what does his bush look like
probably ridiculous see that dick so you see that doctor you see that doctor in
the ring they just show him with glasses mm-hmm check this story out there's bang
there's bang no that doctor on the left mm-hmm check this out oh so he's gonna
get in trouble right now no not at all okay horrible story though Jamie do we
have any more of these things we have regular coffee don't we didn't you make
regular oh you some just coffee no I used some myself. Just coffee. No butter, no bullshit.
So that doctor, right?
He goes on a family vacation. Wife,
three kids. Peep it.
Wife, three kids, and fucking
Subaru Outback, whatever the hell it was.
He's in Wyoming. They go,
don't drive. There's a flash flood warning.
He goes, ah, fuck it. We can get
through it. Drives.
Flash flood warning through this thing.
Takes the car over.
Entire family dies except for him.
Oh, my God.
Three kids.
Three little kids and the wife.
Oh, my God.
I'm just full of fucking.
Who brought the good news beer?
You're the worst today.
Who brought the good news beer?
Hey, man.
I didn't know they were going to show the fucking guy.
Oh, Jesus.
You didn't have to tell the whole story.
It's intense, right?
That's pretty intense.
So then Shane Carlin and a bunch of us did like a fundraiser for him.
Ugh, horrible, man.
Again, nature is a cruel, cruel bitch.
Nature does not give a fuck.
We found an elk that got murked by another elk.
Damn it.
Elk on elk crime?
Elk on elk crime.
That's rare, right?
Nope.
We're all super common.
They fight to the death sometimes. Dog, dog. They stab each other with their giant ant crime. That's rare, right? Nope. We're all super common. They fight to the death sometimes.
Dog, dog.
They stab each other with their giant antlers.
That's what the antlers are for.
But occasionally, you know, sometimes they just get scarred up and they have cuts on
their foot.
Yeah, I've seen them like headbutt and shit on TV.
Maybe rams.
Because they tangle antlers.
Like deer and elk and moose, they tangle antlers.
That's what the antlers are for.
I'm trying to suck on those antlers so that, what is it, IGF-1 or some shit people were
doing?
You want the velvet.
Yeah, I want to suck on that velvet.
Yeah.
The velvet, deer velvet and elk velvet, it was like a real hot property a while ago.
It was such a hot property that what they were doing was at the Sevia.
such a hot property that what they were doing was at the stevia the um the uh there were farms in alberta where they were growing this shit they were growing elk just to use their velvet and then
the process for whatever reason uh became less and less valuable to people and the uh amount that's
that stevia is super weak just pour a bunch in there like it's sugar. That was like the worst stevia.
Jamie got it from the dollar store.
God damn it, Jamie.
But, so this guy spent like a million dollars investing in this elk farm,
thinking he was going to cash in on this deer velvet.
Spraying shit?
Yeah, from the elk.
And nobody gives a fuck.
That's a terrible idea.
Well, he thought it was going to be a gangbuster business, but the business dropped right after he bought it.
Is this the same guy that opened up a fucking all-black yoga studio in Seattle?
Oh, those poor fucks.
They're getting attacked.
Fucking horrible idea.
They're getting attacked online, too.
Damn, they showed this fool's record set three and five.
That's a weird thing.
That's tough.
That's bang on bang, you know?
Bang, bang on bang.
He's that guy that...
This guy's tough, too, man.
That guy's three and five, they said.
He's tough.
The guy bang on bang is the guy that...
What is his name?
Who did he fight?
He fought somebody recently in a really good fight.
I'm trying to remember.
But he fought Raymond Daniels,
and Raymond Daniels hit him with that spinning, flying 360 sidekick to the face.
Love it.
Yeah, he jumped with the front leg sidekick like a flying sidekick,
and then he touches you with that and spins
and clipped him right on the chin and sent him to la-la land.
But Ombank's tough as fuck, man.
The other guy I think is from L.A.
I think he might be from the yard.
I think.
Oh, shit, nice knee.
How much do these boys make?
Not that much money, man.
I'm sure Schilling makes good money.
Is Schilling making good money tonight being a headliner?
Does anyone know or no?
I don't know.
We're guessing.
I'm just guessing.
You know what?
I just root for glory.
I love kickboxing.
I've always loved kickboxing.
I love Muay Thai, too.
I root for lion fight, too.
I almost watch every lion fight, every glory.
I watch every one of these.
Me too, man.
I don't miss much.
Especially line fight.
I like line fight because they use elbows.
I like line fight because a lot of times there's a lot of new guys on there,
and they go for fucking broke, man.
They seem to get a lot of high-level Thai guys too.
Correct.
And they fly them in against an American.
Joe Nguyen, have you seen Nguyen fight?
Jesus Christ. He's nasty. I know we've said it before, that Tiff time like an American. Joe Nguyen. Have you seen Nguyen fight? Jesus Christ.
He's nasty.
I know we've said it before, that Tiff time bomb, man.
Little beast.
She's very good.
Very good.
We could just teach her some takedown defense.
She got one on 115.
Yeah.
She's very good.
Enjoy that, ladies.
Yeah.
Reverse Joanna.
She talked some shit about Joanna's stand-up, too.
Which is basic.
Ooh, basic bitch.
Basic bitch.
Oh, we got something.
Look at me trying to start something.
Ooh. Oh, what are you having? Diet Coke, bitch? Basic bitch. Basic bitch. Oh, we got something. Look at me trying to start something. Ooh.
Oh, what are you having?
Diet Coke, bitch?
Basic bitch.
Basic bitch.
Stupid basic bitch.
What do you got?
A fucking blueberry muffin with your coffee, you basic bitch?
Is there anything worse than called a basic bitch if you're a girl?
That's pretty ruthless, man.
It's, well, being called anything, you know?
But having someone define you.
Basic bitch.
But having someone, like, limited defining you like that, define you, you're limited.
It's hard.
It's hard out there.
It's hard out there.
It's the worst.
Yeah, man.
It's the worst.
Enjoy your coffee, basic bitch.
But for a girl, though, does a girl have to be more than basic or should she be basic and hot?
That's tough.
Well, see the hot factor, you know?
Well, yeah, man.
That's nature right there.
That is, man.
People want to hate on it.
Nature likes that hip to waist ratio.
Hell yeah, we do.
Nature's a big fan of titties.
They're universally accepted.
It's not like there's a place in the world where you have a perfect set of tits and people
go, ugh, get those out of here.
There's not a single country where men don't look at juicy tits and go, oh, yeah.
They're totally useless.
Juicy tits.
They don't do anything for you.
Yeah, they don't make sense.
They don't increase pleasure unless you're fucking them, unless you're titty fucking.
But you see them and your brain goes, oh, yeah.
It's weird, isn't it? It's nature.
There's bags of fat. Bags of fat
with nipples that you can suck on
and they gently put, and if they have weight to them
and the girl's riding you and you can
hoist them up and suck on them,
oh, everything gets so exciting.
Why? Because of nature. They do nothing.
They do nothing. Nature.
Nature wants you to have a wife that has some big old
titties so that when your kids need breast milk, these titties are down to produce. Nature. Nature wants you to have a wife that has some big old titties so that when your kids need
breast milk, these titties are down to produce.
Yeah.
Big ass titties?
Dudes are like, yes.
You need fat.
You need big hips and fat and asses and legs that look like they can run and jump.
So you have kids that inherit those traits.
Yeah, man.
If you see a girl with weird hips and her ass is flat, she walks with a stumble,
you're like, oh, no, no, no.
Let's beat it, basic bitch.
I call them basic bitches.
Beat it with your flat feet.
Your flat feet.
Flat ass.
Why can't you walk straight?
Dude, flat ass.
That's not exciting.
There's nothing worse than a flat ass.
Yeah, I don't mind if a girl has small breasts.
No, we'll figure it out.
There's a lot of really hot girls
that have small breasts.
We'll have money.
We'll figure that out. Well, it's not even that. You know what I'm saying? You know what I'm saying? If he gets serious enough, I don't mind if a girl has small breasts. No, we'll figure it out. There's a lot of really hot girls that have small breasts. We'll have money. We'll figure that out.
Well, it's not even that.
You know what I'm saying?
You know what I'm saying?
If he gets serious enough, I'll cover this.
Would you, though?
Would you want to?
Or would you rather?
100%.
Hey, shop sponsor.
You take that over.
What would you take, though?
If you had the option between a girl with a really nice ass and nice legs and small,
natural breasts, or a girl with a pretty decent ass, pretty legs and small natural breasts or a girl who's a pretty decent ass pretty decent legs but big fake titties
Oh ass all day because I can fix the titties that because they haven't they
haven't what if she didn't want to fix the titties what if that's a deal breaker
I have to move on Wow I'm just kidding I'm not You are not kidding. I'm not kidding if you see my girl. She looks like she's from planet Pluto.
But the thing is they haven't figured out a good way to make ass implants.
Like you see a fake ass?
It's the worst thing you've ever seen.
There's a difference, man.
There's a difference.
The ass thing is like there's factors, right?
The titty factor is like the nurturing factor
like that's the attraction is that she'll be good at nurturing she has breasts for but the ass thing
is like an athletic body it's like an exciting body oh ombang's getting fucked up this dude who's
three and five is teeing off said bitch i'm four and I'm four and five, you basic bitch. Oh, yeah, yeah, he's four and five tonight.
Four and five, motherfucker.
I like the fact.
Oh, shit.
Oh, damn, I like the fact he's done.
He's done, done.
He's done.
I like the fact that they throw knees.
I do like that.
I'm glad they can still throw knees.
And I think they're allowed to hold only with one hand, though.
That's it.
This fight's over.
He's taking it.
He's done, done.
Yeah, let's go ahead and call this a day, everybody.
Wow, he's standing up.
Worst knee I've ever seen, Overeem, Fujita.
You remember that one?
I thought he killed him.
Overeem killed a guy.
Overeem Teixeira.
Did you ever see that one?
Yes.
Ever seen Teixeira with the crazy dreadlocks?
Yeah, man.
He hits him with a knee, and that dude's like he went down like he was dead.
Dude, Fujita, he was in the ring like, there he goes, faces in cave, like he was so fucked up.
Yeah.
And that's Uber Reem.
We're not talking about normal Overeem now where it's like, oh, we don't know if he's uber rain we're not talking about normal over now
where it's like oh we don't know if he's gonna win we're talking about fucking japan over rain
well good luck with that everybody japan over him once he hit that like k1 grand prix heavyweight
yeah the fuck is going on they dug up nazis that had special science. Just some shit.
They brought it into the lab.
Well, this dude fought very well.
What is his name?
Do we know, Jamie?
Good for him, man.
Yeah.
I've seen this dude fight before.
He's good.
That was like a big victory.
That was very impressive.
Ombang took a beating.
There's that doctor, bro.
Looks like Ari Shaffir.
Got his ear pierced.
Well.
Maybe he's wiling out.
I'm sure he is.
At 400%.
He's got some weird chains on his neck, too.
Ah, that's a bummer.
Hey, he's trying to make it happen.
How dare you?
How dare you?
How dare you?
Dude.
If I was like Joe Rogan, Scrooge McDuck, Rich,
I'm hiring scientists to build fake asses like no other.
You don't want a fake ass, though.
What happens if a girl has a flat ass?
Tough life.
It's hard out there.
You don't breed.
Just like what happens if, you know, in the wild, what happens if you have unfavorable characteristics?
You get ate up, ass first.
That's how it goes.
Bro, but what if we could prevent that?
It's the way of the world.
It's the way of the world.
You can't prevent that with a piece of plastic.
The way they're going to prevent it, no, no, no.
You can give the illusion that you're preventing it, but you know that ass is fake. It's the same thing with lips.
Lips, you can't do to lips
what you did to tits. They found a crazy
loophole with tits, and it works.
They snuck in with the tit implants,
and everybody's like, well, hey, we could
do it there. We could do it everywhere.
But you can't.
It only works on women's tits.
It doesn't work on guys' tits.
Dude, I'm not mad at the women's.
The guy gets tit implants.
Women's lips.
Girls don't want that shit.
Some women's lips, I'm not mad at them.
They get a couple.
Okay, we're going to have to talk off the air.
We are.
Yeah.
We really are.
This is nonsense.
This is craziness, bro.
Who is this young gentleman here?
I've seen him fight before.
Not a full crowd yet.
This isn't the main card, is it?
No, no, no.
Robert Thomas, Jeff Riddick.
This is early in the card.
This is early.
22.
Youngster.
My boy on the right is jacked at 34.
I think he's flexing.
Makes sense, though.
Right?
You think he's flexing?
100%.
He's got a beautiful beard, though, and a mohawk.
That's rare in fighters.
He looks fresh off the set of 300.
Look at him.
I think they're going to fix it with gene therapy, dude.
That's the real fix.
This plastic they shove in your ass to make your ass stick out isn't fooling anybody.
The same thing with your lips.
Like, why are your lips bigger than all the surrounding tissue?
That doesn't make any sense.
They fool me with the lips.
They fool me, bro.
Might be a little bit basic.
You know what?
I might be a basic bitch.
I like lips.
I think girls' lips are, like, really important.
When you're kissing a girl and you feel.
For many reasons, Joe.
But if you're feeling, like, a rubber thing under there, I can't think that would be good.
It just looks weird, too.
Not if it's done right.
Okay.
Maybe I'm wrong.
There's a lot of good doctors out there.
I hope so.
But I think that what you're seeing now is like it's the beginning.
Like when they thought they could put like feathers on people and have them jump off cliffs and it didn't work out.
It's a horrible idea.
No, well, eventually it became an airplane.
Somebody had to keep trying with that thought until they got it right,
and now you get on a Virgin Airlines jet to Boston,
and you fucking got the beautiful red mood lighting.
You have yourself a champagne.
It all started from some asshole with a bunch of feathers
who thought he could jump off a cliff.
It has to start there.
And right now, these girls that you're looking at with these crazy fake lips and these plastic plates in their asses that make their ass stick out,
what they are is the dude with the feather jumping off the cliff.
Yeah.
And their unfortunate demise, when they get tangled up in the branches of the tree below, their unfortunate demise will make people innovate.
True.
I'm with you, man.
I hope I'm around for that.
Who do we got here, Jamie?
Oh, damn.
This dude from Canada just landed a beautiful knee to the body.
So we're watching these fights.
If you're watching these at home, you might not even be able to.
There's no way you're going to sync this up.
There's no way.
We'll try to sync it up.
Once we get to Joe Schilling
Stitch him up
Who is a little bit later on the card
Once we get to stitch him up
We'll tell you exactly what time it is
And you can sync this thing up later
This fight's in, I think, McNichols Arena
That's old school, man
Super old school
That's where one of the first UFCs was at
Do you miss Denver at all in any way?
You know what?
No.
Wow.
It's weird, right?
I go back and I feel like I'm in a country western, man.
Denver people are going to hate me, but it's whatever, bro.
It's true.
It's my favorite spot.
Oh, there's some great spots, and I have great family and friends,
but you could not pay me to move back there, man.
I will never leave L.A.
It's my number one choice.
Comedy works.
Outside of California, Colorado's my number one choice.
You used to live there.
Yep.
Evergreen, Boulder, or Denver.
Those are my three spots.
You love that nature shit.
I love that nature shit.
I don't, bro.
You don't like it?
I'll hunt with you, kill some shit,
but then I want to go back to Marina del Rey,
jump in my Porsche, and do some weird shit. As as I've gotten older I appreciate nature way more and more I
feel like it's like something that I just didn't I didn't appreciate enough
until I got older like I think when I was younger I was always concentrating
entirely on doing whatever I'm trying to do whether it's fighting or going
getting into comedy getting my career in line,
becoming a professional comedian.
All the things that I've ever done,
I've always been concentrated more on them
than anything else.
As I got older, I started
what brings me pleasure?
I started thinking, what do I enjoy
being around? One of the things
that I enjoyed being around was beautiful nature.
To see a
mountain like I remember going to um Jesus I don't know where the fuck it was like one of the first
I got us you know what here one of the big one was going to the Aspen Comedy Festival man I went
to the Aspen Comedy Festival I want to say like 2002 I think it was like 2002 and uh I was in
Aspen and I was driving with this dude who worked for the festival,
and he was telling me how he has elk off of his back porch.
I didn't know elk screamed.
I had no idea.
I didn't know a goddamn thing about elk back then.
They scream.
Elk bugling?
You never heard of elk bugling?
No, man.
I recorded some of it from my trip.
This is real shit that happened this week.
Hey, elk, make it easier to kill you.
They scream. Oh, they're not easy
to kill, man. Especially with a bow.
They're hard, but what it
is is that they're trying
to get some pussy. So they call out
to women
to let them know that they're
ready to fuck. And they also call out to men.
They're ready to challenge them.
They do battle. I'll show you some pictures of this dead one that they found it got stabbed up
He got murked by some other fucking bull and they're big
These are a thousand pound animals just like the one you kill bigger as big as the one I killed things
He fucked the one the one that died was bigger than the one I killed bigger who killed him
Some badass bitch listen to this though. This is what it sounds like. Hope it sounds like a grown man yelling
You hear that
That's the guy trying to call them. He's making like a cow call, but listen to sound that they make when they respond
It's like making like a cow call. But listen to the sound that they make when they respond. It's like a monster.
That high-pitched shit, that's the guide making the call.
Now listen to them.
You hear that?
Almost sounds like orca whales.
Damn.
They scream at each other like that.
That really loud one was the guide right next to us with the call.
That's one of them screaming.
Damn.
That was an elk.
How weird, right?
Then do you listen to that and find out where they're at and just destroy them?
Well, you've got to sneak up on them.
Yeah, but at least you know where they're at.
You sneak up on them, and then you hide behind stuff, and you make calls like a cow,
so they think they're going to get some pussy.
Fucking basic bitch elks.
Too easy, man.
They come screaming, too.
When they come towards you, that's one of the most nerve-wracking parts about it.
They're like...
Because they think they're about to fuck.
Exactly.
Dick out.
They're like, what's up?
They come all over themselves.
They piss all over themselves and cum all over themselves.
Their whole underside, when you find them and they're rutting, is just covered with cum and piss.
They're all wet.
They're looking for a good time.
They're partying.
Fuck, man.
You guys just, hey, what's up?
Oh, raging boner.
Boom.
Dead, bro.
It is rude.
But it's also how mountain lions find them, too.
When we were in Colorado, one of the guides I was with told me that they had found this mountain lion on top of this elk.
And they found it by following the path that it took once it dragged the elk.
So what he found was, like, you could see the mountain lion footprints,
and then you could see the elk footprints, and then they collide,
and then there's no more mountain lion footprints
because the mountain lion is riding the elk's back.
So you've got this 1,200-pound elk,
and this 150-pound cat is on its back biting its neck,
and it runs like 100, 200 yards with this cat on its back,
and then it piles up, and then the cat eats it.
And then they catch the cat on top of this thing.
You know what, man?
I think the reason why I don't get down with nature and mountains and stuff,
because I grew up in Denver, man.
So I was going camping all the time.
I was shooting arrows when I was young and shit.
So I'm over it, man.
You're over it.
I love the ocean. I can't get enough of the ocean. Yeah,'m over it, man. You're over it. I love the ocean.
I can't get enough of the ocean.
Yeah, see, that's it.
You're experiencing the new nature.
Yeah, man.
The ocean is...
I rented a place in Malibu for like three months.
It was last summer.
And I would wake up every morning just looking at that water going, whoa.
I feel like there's nothing better.
It's crazy.
Love it.
It's crazy.
It's a crazy view.
And it's a morphing view.
Like in the daytime, it's inviting.
And at nighttime, it's terrifying.
Terrifying.
Black.
That's the only difference.
The only difference is you can't see.
Would you ever live in Malibu?
I don't know if it's wise to buy a home next to the water.
I don't know if it's wise to spend several million dollars
for a house that's stuck in the sand
right in front of the lip of the ocean.
You want to talk about basic bitches?
Are you not paying attention to the entirety of the human history
that's been recorded about the changing of the Earth's atmosphere
and about how you find cities that are underwater.
They were like Roman cities and shit.
Now they're underwater.
Why are they underwater?
Well, they're underwater because the ocean moves.
It expands.
It's not stuck there.
It's not going to stay exactly where it is.
If you're looking for an investment 2,000 years from now,
yeah, probably don't buy a house in Malibu.
However, for when you're alive, you should be fine, Joe.
You know what I'm saying?
Yeah.
Maybe, but maybe not.
I can almost guarantee you'll be fine.
How about what happened in Japan?
That shit could happen in Malibu any day.
Any day.
I have a friend who lives in Pacific Palace.
It's got a nice sweet spot up a hill.
And I go, why don't you live by the water?
You got a lot of money.
He goes, tsunamis. Tsunamis. I go, really? He goes, yeah. He
goes, they happen. He goes, they might not happen, but they happen. And when they happen,
guess what? What are you going to hear? You're going to hear a horn in the middle of the
night. I sleep with a sound machine. I have a sound machine next to my bed, play sounds
of like birds and shit so I could sleep. That's what he said. He goes, I'm not drowning in
death. God damn, that's dark.
I mean, fuck, bro.
I live right on, you know, I live on the marina.
The way they sold me there, like, if a tsunami comes, this thing tilts.
It tilts.
Oh, yeah.
I said, really?
They were like, I'll take it.
It tilts.
I'll take it.
Save all that tilting shit.
It's going to fill up with water.
Nah, I'm high up, man.
The real tsunami, the real bad motherfuckers, the continent changers.
Yeah, I think they're going to knock that bitch right over.
It's going to drown it.
It's going to be all underwater.
Like, the idea of, like, 500 feet of water up and down, that's nothing.
In the history of the world, that shit's happened thousands of times.
Bro, you're not a real estate agent, for fuck's sake.
I'd be like, look, what you really want to do is you want to be on top of the mountain looking down,
and you want to have a raft up there.
Yeah, man.
You got to have like Noah.
Fuck, bro.
I don't know if that's a reason not to live by the beach.
No.
The beach is awesome.
It's still awesome.
If you were like Super Baller, like Richard Branson type character, you really ideally want two houses.
You want a house at the top of the mountain.
No, you want three.
You want a house at the top of the mountain. You want a want three. You want a house at the top of the mountain.
You want a fat place in the city.
True.
And then you want a spot on the water.
That's how you want to do it, man.
If you're going to be a fucking super baller.
Scrooge McDuck style.
Yeah, but you got to have like, you know, fucking shell oil type money.
You think?
If you want to do it right.
A lot of money in having three mansions.
I'm not talking about mansions.
Maybe have a condo downtown, like a dope-ass penthouse.
That's a good move.
Yeah, man.
I'm not a big fan of living downtown because of the goddamn traffic.
But, you know.
It's tough, man.
It's brutal.
It's brutal to get down there.
Downtown's ruthless.
I would never live downtown.
But it's kind of dope.
Like, you could walk around downtown now
And it's like it's cleaning up and LA's putting a ton of money into it
They want to be like the hot new hot spot, so it's a good place to buy they got to kill bums
They're gonna kill some bums. They're gonna have to kill some bombs. What the fuck you said we're kidding folks. We're not kidding
I'm not gonna have to raise the property value. We're gonna have to get rid of them
No, I'm just kidding this guy first of, this dude from Canada is a motherfucker, dude.
The guy in the black shorts, is he from Canada?
He is, right?
Dude, he's badass, man.
This is a tough fight.
That other dude is taking some serious body shots.
Third round here.
I just think that the bum thing, all bullshit aside,
obviously I don't think you should kill him,
but when you stop and look at him, it's a horrible indictment
of how flawed our current system of community is,
that our community allows people to get so disenfranchised.
There's an entire whole ecosystem of people in downtown L.A.
I get that. I look at him, they make me sad.
I think people don't know what we're talking about.
Skid Row?
Skid Row.
These people that are listening to us,
oh, you're being so mean about homeless people.
Nah, man.
This is a different thing.
It's like Walking Dead,
but imagine all the zombies in one place,
and they will eat your dick off for crack.
It is really crazy.
It's one of the craziest things you'll ever see.
There's a ton of them in Venice
too, man. Oh, yeah. A ton in Venice.
Yeah. They get uncomfortable too.
You're at those Venice beach spots
where they gather
and they want money from tourists, so they
start begging. Yeah, it's rough.
Well, there's a lot of crazy people. That's really what it is.
It's a mental health issue.
That gets thrown around a lot for
everything, right? I think some of them are mental health.
I think some are just like, fuck it, man.
Yep.
I think also, though, saying fuck it, though, is a bit of a mental health issue.
Is it?
Or is it just called giving up?
I think even that is mental health.
Like, don't you think it's healthy to have good friends?
It's healthy to be a good friend.
It's healthy to have good friends. It's healthy to be a good friend. It's healthy to be in love.
It's healthy to be fulfilled by your pursuits in life,
whether it is your artistic pursuits or athletic pursuits or your career pursuits.
Those are health issues.
It's like, isn't it healthy to exercise, right?
That's a physical health issue.
He doesn't exercise.
That's a choice.
Right.
But when you talk and consider
physical health physical health is dependent upon choices it's dependent upon dietary choices and
it's dependent upon choices uh that you make as far as like how much exercise you do and that's
your health i think mental health is the same thing i think there's aspects of mental health
that are undeniable just like there's aspects of physical health that are undeniable there's people that are
born with horrible physical diseases and and and and they there's not much they
can do it physically to overcome those and there's all sorts of deformities and
all sorts of real problems that people have that are physical but then there's
also people that are just fucking overeating lazy fucks and they develop heart disease.
Well, isn't that a physical health issue?
Well, it most certainly is.
And how that physical health issue manifests itself?
Through choices and decisions and your actions.
True.
So then it becomes a mental health issue as well.
So it's a physical health issue, but it's also a mental health issue because it's your mental health that is out of line that allows your physical health to get so fucked up but also certain people's
experiences in life I don't know if I'd say it's mental a mental health issue
where they have an issue with their brain you know I'm saying where it's
chemically different sometimes they might not have had the same
opportunities as other people and just say listen man fuck this like maybe they
lost a family member maybe they lost their, you know, I'm sick of this shit, man.
Yeah, that's true. I think there's some of that.
But I think that could be considered
a mental health issue.
I have a problem with people
chalking up everything as mental health.
Like these shooters,
these random shooters,
it's always a mental health thing.
Oh, it's a mental health thing.
Man, that's an easy getaway.
They might just be fucked up, man.
Bad people.
Yes.
Can we chalk some things up that people are just evil, man?
We could, but that also is, I think, could be considered a mental health issue.
And I think the word mental health, we get thrown around like, we look at health and
disease and issues like that are where you're not balanced in an order.
We look at it like, oh're not balanced in an order.
We look at it like, oh, Jimmy caught gonorrhea. Well, that guy's got a disease. He needs penicillin.
But if you're just a lazy fuck that eats like shit and eventually your heart gives out, you have heart disease and that is a physical disorder. It's a physical disorder that came
from you not having discipline for whatever reason. Making poor choices.
Making poor choices.
So it manifests itself in a physical condition.
It could also manifest itself in a mental condition because you could be at a point where, are we giving up on that feed?
Is that what's going on?
I got a lot of messages saying that that was the prelims and that the main card is going on now live.
Oh.
Oh, nice, on the West Coast.
So it was just the prelims live?
I had the link from their website, and that was what it was playing.
So the main card supposedly
is live now. Oh, so
when they were saying that we were watching it,
we were watching the prelims. Okay.
That makes sense. So, okay,
now that we have that, let's put up the card on the...
Okay, cool.
But I think the word disease
is an issue, and the word health
is an issue, because it's really like we categorize things like health and disease and we get real rigid with how we look at them. compulsions, when you have negative behavior that you can't help but keep continuing to repeat over
and over again, self-sabotaging behavior, that is a mental health issue. When you have obsessive,
like you're a stalker, you start stalking a girl, you won't leave her alone, you're obsessed with
her, you check her Facebook, you check her, like that's, that obsession is a disorder. Like you
could call it a mental health issue, you could call it, you could call it behavioral malfunction. True. But it's, you're not healthy mentally. And it, so it is a mental
health issue. Like if you go into a school and you shoot people, 100% you have a mental health
issue. A hundred percent, 100%. The issue is you can't be mentally healthy and want to go and
shoot random people just so people know your name. You can't want that. If you want that, you are mentally unwell. And so I think when we
look at things like, oh, it's not his fault. He has a mental health disorder. Oh, that's just a
cop out. Well, no, he's responsible for whatever that disorder is, but he most certainly has a
disorder. Like when someone's a rapist to build Cosby, okay?
He's got a mental health issue. It doesn't exonerate him
It doesn't say that he should be free and no one should look no one should prosecute him
And you know he should somehow or another be
Treated instead of locked up. Yeah, no, no
That's not what I'm saying
But you have to have a mental health issue in order to drug women and fuck them when they're unconscious.
You have to have a total disconnect for feeling about that woman's health, her safety, her physical solidarity or physical hurt, her ability to to like own her own body and own her own consciousness.
For you to want to bypass that with a pill so you can stick your dick in her,
you have to be mentally well.
What if he was raised that way?
It doesn't matter.
It doesn't matter.
Because you can be mentally raised to be racist, like we were talking before,
or you can be raised in a mental pattern
where you're homophobic.
All those are absolutely 100% possible.
But at the end of the day, you're still mentally unwell.
Like you're mentally unwell because of the way you were raised.
You're mentally unwell in spite of the way you were raised.
It doesn't matter.
You're mentally unwell.
Like, and I think if we look at behavior overall,
like what is conducive to a happy experience for you
and the people that you encounter?
What is conducive to you being fulfilled in your life
and having great friendships and great relationships?
What is conducive to that?
Well, if you move towards that
and you try to eliminate all the errors
that you keep repeating and making
and you recognize those, that healthy that's healthy well this
is the thing though so if I if I am mental health issues there's a lot of
negative that comes with it right so so if I whatever have this weird
inclination to to molest boys or whatever for whatever reason area well
for whatever it whatever it is or to rape girls
Yeah, right, right. It's gonna be tough to get help right because you have this negative connotation with it sure
So that's why it keeps going on well
That's saying certainly a part of it and there's no there's no and I'm not promoting any of this fucking bullshit
But I'm just saying there's no like safe house for them right like they can't go back
Hey, man, listen. I have this weird fantasy where I fucking loved and molested little kids.
People are like, what?
You know what I'm saying?
There's no outlet for them.
It's true.
I mean, to have a fantasy where you victimize small children is like the most taboo and forbidden fantasy ever.
You can't even jerk off to that.
But if you have that, you're fucked.
You can't even pretend.
You're super fucked.
Well, say if a guy, say if you're married, right?
You're super fucked.
Well, say if a guy, say if you're married, right?
And, you know, maybe your wife puts on a few pounds, but you want to stay married, and you don't want to cheat on her, and, you know, she doesn't want to have sex anymore.
Maybe she's older, and she gets the menopause.
And you just go into your garage or wherever the fuck you keep your porn, and you whack one off every now and then.
Just whack one off to stay sane.
Everything else is great But when you're closing your eyes you're whacking off and you're looking at porn You're looking at some dirty girl with a tattoo on her lower back
And she's sucking dick and you just want to cum in her mouth
See you get you're allowed to indulge those fantasies if you're a man like if you're a guy who has no chance whatsoever of
Banging some super hot porn 10 you could still jerk off watching
her fuck you can so that's what you like yeah you could still jerk off watching someone just
hold their hair and just mouth fucker you can do that and no repercussions like you could never
have sex with that girl ever but you could jerk off to her having sex and have no repercussions
that's your taste right but if your taste is like young boys, like twinks, like 15-year-old twinks, you have nothing.
Everything is illegal.
It doesn't even mean that you want to go out and have sex with those young boys or you plan on having sex with those boys.
You can't even jerk off to them.
So it leads me to question, like, what happens if in the future they figure out virtual reality like they get
virtual reality to a point where it's just you can't anything goes anything goes in virtual
reality so you have these artificial young boys that blow you will that be illegal because no
one's getting hurt there these artificial boys are made out of 3d polygons they're connected
together with some visual video effects engine.
It's hard to argue because it satisfies the urge, right?
And they're not doing it to actual humans.
Yeah, right.
But you want to eliminate that urge, though.
You want to cut it out of the society.
Okay, so what do you do?
You want to nip it in the bud?
Kill these guys?
Yeah.
All right, I'm with you.
Them and the bums.
I think you might have to.
Them and the bums.
Them and the bums.
See ya.
I wish there was a way to just rewire you. I mean, I wish, in all fairness. I think you might have to. Them and the bums. Them and the bums. See ya. I wish there was a way to just rewire you.
I mean, I wish, I mean, in all fairness.
I bet they do, too.
I bet a lot of people do.
Oh, yeah.
Who have all those issues.
Of course.
Those real dark people who are unhappy, you don't think they wish they could be rewired?
Sure, man.
Even gamblers.
You ever meet a guy who's like a crazy gambler?
Shit, I'll take some rewiring and a few things.
Yeah.
You know, it's really interesting.
Someone was talking to me about this fat guy that I know,
and his wife was saying that it's kind of crazy because, first of all,
that guy, what's his name, Halsley?
Halsley.
That is the biggest 185-pounder.
That is a large human being.
That guy is gigantic for 185.
I like this Michael.
Michael Page.
Yeah, I like that Michael Page.
He's ridiculous.
He's fun to watch.
His talents are almost wasted in that division that he's competing against.
He needs to fight a much higher caliber of fighter.
He's collecting paychecks.
What was I just saying?
What were we just talking about?
Oh, you have a fat friend.
Oh.
And his wife was like, here's the difference between being addicted to anything else.
If you're addicted to cigarettes, you stop smoking cigarettes, and then you kick the habit.
But if you're addicted to food, you have to eat food's a legit point it was a very legit point and i thought about it i went whoa
it's a super legit point obviously i don't have food issues i don't have um you know um a real uh
food addiction but over the last nine days i quit eating eating sugar. Lost six pounds now, as of today, six fucking pounds,
and I'm not trying.
Like, I'm just eating normal.
I'm doing the same.
You're not doing more cardio or anything?
Nope, nope, same amount.
Everything's the same.
Workout's the same.
Everything's the same.
But you were getting your sugar from where?
From these fucking mango things, which I just ate a bag full of.
Oh, the mango things.
Yeah, I thought you were C2O.
C2O is delicious and sweet, but that's natural.
That's just the coconut water.
So it's from fruit or whatever you get.
Yeah, fruit's fine.
I've been eating bananas every day, and I eat oranges and apples.
I eat a lot of fruit.
But those mangoes, those chili mangoes are so goddamn good.
I haven't ate much today.
I came in, I saw that bag, and I thought, you know what?
YOLO.
Fuck this.
YOLO?
When's the last time you heard YOLO?
I don't know why
that came out of my mouth.
I don't know why
that came out of my mouth.
I don't even talk like that.
It's got added sugar.
That's the problem.
It's not just the sugar
from the dried mangoes.
They put sugar
and then the chili sauce together,
the chili pepper together.
Mangoes from heaven
is what I say.
So good.
Heaven dust?
Oh, you mean sugar?
I'm fucking addicted, man.
So I go nine days in and I decide I'm going a month in.
I'm going to see what happens when I make it to a month.
You know what, though?
You're a real disciplined type of dude who can do that.
You know what I'm saying?
Yeah.
Like you stick something, you're fucking sticking to it.
That's one thing I know about you.
I definitely do.
But what I'm thinking is while I'm doing this, I'm like, man, I don't even have an issue.
And this is like overwhelming my thoughts
like a lot of the day.
Like where I see
like a hot dog
with a nice white roll
on a white bun,
that white bread.
I'm not eating any of that shit.
I'm not eating that.
So I see that hot dog
with fucking sauerkraut on it.
Ooh, you ever go to Home Depot
and they have the hot dog cart
in front of Home Depot?
Oh, those things
are so fucking good.
Motherfuckers.
Forget me.
I'm there for a hammer.
I'm trying to buy a hammer. I'm trying to buy a hammer.
I'm not trying to buy a hot dog.
Dude.
I end up walking out with that hot dog and a churro.
And then they get that churro, and I'm like, fuck it.
You know what?
I'll wash it down with a Coke.
Disneyland gets me with them goddamn churros.
Bro, the churros and the funnel cakes.
I got Mickey Mouse ears on and shit, feeling like shit.
I'm done, dude.
I'm not.
No sugar for this month.
So I'm going to see what happens. And at the end of the month, I'm going to see how I feel and what, feeling like shit. I'm done, dude. I'm not, no sugar for this month. So I'm going to see what happens.
And at the end of the month, I'm going to see how I feel and what I look like.
This is, but is, I'm assuming everyone in your household is this way.
Yeah.
Because if they're not, you're going to have troubles.
No, I'm not going to have troubles.
I used to date a girl who I was trying to eat real healthy, but she literally had crazy
genetics.
She would eat fast food every night.
So I'd be like eating fucking, you know, broccoli
and chicken. She's balls deep in a 12 piece
chicken nugget. You know what I'm saying?
It's tough, man. It is
but when I get it in my head
it doesn't matter. You can eat pizza right in front of me.
You're a beast with it. Well, I just
have switches. I have like
okay, now you don't do this anymore
and that's it. And once I don't do that anymore
I don't do that anymore. Because then if I. And once I don't do that anymore, I don't do that anymore.
Because then if I do do it, if I give in,
that'll permeate itself in the rest of my life.
That'll leak itself into my comedy, leak itself into my workouts.
It'll leak itself into everything.
Do you do that with your social life?
If someone fucks you over and you're like, you're dead to me?
Yes.
Awful.
Yes, yes.
I would assume.
As soon as they, like, you will run into people that will like either sabotage you or do a bad business deal with you or try to fuck you in some way.
And, you know, you can't hate him. I forgive him like as a person, but I won't associate with him anymore.
Ever again. No. Yeah. There's no. Yeah. No, no, no.
I mean, you'd have to like have some insane apology with a real
explanation and then you know we probably have to work our way back to a friendship real slow
yeah but when someone fucks you over you can't you can't tolerate that because those people become
problems and those people that's a pattern that like like if you uh if you have a friend and like
especially like you hear about friends going into business together and then, like, they start a restaurant or something and one guy fucks off with the cash and they wind up fighting each other.
Yeah, man.
My stepdad and his, he had a business partner in an architectural firm and they beat each other up one day.
Should have beat each other up.
Like, he came home and he had a black eye a black eye, and he was in his 40s.
And I was a kid, and I was like, first of all, I was fighting back then.
I was like, this bitch has zero skills.
I was like, what did this fight look like?
Basic-ass stepdad.
The worst.
But he was a good guy.
He wasn't a bad person.
But I knew the guy he fought with, too.
I'm like, that's even more ridiculous that that guy gave you a black eye,
because that has to be insane.
Think how mad they were, though.
They were so mad.
Well, it was a very complicated situation where they had government contracts, and then the government lost money.
Like, there was a recession.
And during the recession, they canceled a lot of their contracts.
So these guys had put all this time and work and effort into these projects
and the projects were pulled out from under them
and all their investment was done.
Super fucked.
It was really bad.
And, you know, they all, I'm sure there was a lot of blame on both sides
and who knows what the fuck happened,
but it's weird when you see someone come home.
Your stepdad got sucker punched.
He's got a black eye.
I'm like, what?
Huh?
Irf.
If I was Brendan Shaw, I'd be like, for sure, keep your hands up next time.
For sure, don't let them get that close to you.
Bro.
Talking shit to each other.
I saw my dad get in a fight when I was 12.
I'm not making this up.
Whatever, fucking cars, right?
My dad pulls in front of him.
He pulls in front of my dad.
He gets out.
My dad goes, you want to fucking go?
My dad's like this.
Oh, no, like an old school Irish boxer.
Oh, no.
I remember being like 10 or 11 and being like, ah, fuck, man.
See, the problem with that is Nick Diaz can actually fight like that.
Oh, my dad beat the brakes off this dude, son.
Yeah, was about to throw him off the side of the highway in a leather jacket.
Oh no.
Yeah, did not fuck around.
When a guy stands out like that, starts doing the old school boxing, one of two things can
happen.
Either he's trying to scare you off, or he's so good with his hands, he just kind of rolls
at you like, what's up dude, you want some-
Yeah, man.
What you gonna do now?
It was weird, man.
You're in a bad situation.
I'll tell you what, for reals, man.
I remember my dad getting out of the car, I'm like, god damn it. What are you going to do now? It was weird, man. You're in a bad situation. I'll tell you what.
For reals, man.
I remember my dad getting out of the car.
I'm like, God damn it.
And then my brother gets out, kicks the guy in the balls from behind.
My brother was probably 12 at the time.
Jesus Christ.
Your brother kicked a grown man in the balls? Grown man in the balls.
That's when it gets really dangerous because the kid gets involved.
I know, man.
And then the father becomes super violent.
You know what little Brown was doing?
What was little Brown doing?
Crying in the backseat. How old were you? What was little Brian doing? Crying in the backseat.
How old were you?
Probably like 10 or 11, crying in the backseat.
You can't be trusted if shit goes down.
Crying.
I never saw my stepdad fight, but I saw him almost get in a fight once.
We got in a minor car accident, like a little fender bender, when I was like 8 or 9 years old.
And it was these young kids in this other car, and they got out swearing and yelling. And I was like, oh, no. I was so scared. So scared. I was like eight or nine years old and I was his young kids in this other car and they got out swearing and yelling and I was like oh no I was so scared so scared I was so scared
because he wasn't a tough guy either please tell me you felt so vulnerable I don't know I might
have I don't think so because I don't think it got to the point where anybody hit anybody so I
probably I would definitely have cried if they hit each other yeah I would have been terrified
but that's how people die.
You know, that's how people wind up killing the whole family.
True, man.
Knock the guy out.
The guy falls, hits his head.
You go, we got to get rid of the family.
And then they just, they murk your wife.
Murk everybody.
Murk your kids.
Fuck it.
That shit happens.
You know, you run into the wrong biker gang.
True, man. You know, they're messed up and trying to prove their hardness.
For sure.
Weird shit happens.
You know, you're the wrong race.
You know, you're a black guy and there's a, you know, you have a white girlfriend maybe.
Who the fuck knows, man?
Yeah, man.
Anything can happen.
You know, how about transgender people?
How about a transgender person gets in a car accident with a bunch of fucking amped up dudes?
Oh, they're fucked.
Yeah.
I mean, and you're on a dirt road somewhere in the middle of nowhere and you just decide to beat this guy to death.
Dude, I need a gun.
For reals, man. If you need a gun. For reals, man.
If you need a gun.
I need a fucking gun.
Most people really need a gun.
Oh, yeah.
That should alarm everybody because I can fight.
Yeah.
People need a gun.
It's a weird thing out there.
You could run into the wrong people.
And I've had people say that to me, like, you're so paranoid.
You know, like, why do you want to learn martial arts?
Like, I had this conversation with Marc Maron once about
this you know it's like well is that really gonna happen like you're really
worried about it like I've seen it like I know bad people I've seen people do
bad things to people I mean people hit people when they didn't have to yeah I
think I said the same thing because I asked him like why should I have a gun
he's like cuz if shit goes down you want to be. He goes, I never go anywhere without a gun.
He goes, because my wife and my kids are depending on me.
He goes, so why haven't that guy has a gun?
And yeah, I have all these fighting skills.
What the fuck am I going to do?
He goes, I would never let them down.
And he's, you know, world-class fighter.
World-class.
And he's saying this.
I was like, damn, I need a gun.
But he's also.
I tried buying one off the black market.
Why would you do that when you can get one for real?
From him.
And he was like, get the fuck out of here.
Yeah, don't even say you tried.
That was a joke.
It was a joke.
Yeah, lie.
We lied.
We just lied?
Yeah, 100%.
He made fun of me.
But you can get one, you know, legally, fairly easily.
You got a guy?
Yeah, no, it's not hard.
Yeah, wink, wink, wink.
It's not hard.
Wink, wink, wink.
It's not hard to get a gun in California.
It's one of the weird things.
I got to fill out paperwork and shit.
Not hard.
Do I have to take lessons no that's what's crazy
whose phone is that mine of yours definitely not mine you you don't have
to like fill out paperwork at least you didn't when I did I mean if it paperwork
as far as like take a test yeah it's kind of give me the goddamn thing it's
not hard like hunter safety like when like when you take a hunter safety course, you do most of that online.
And then you go and take like a class.
Is there a wait?
Class?
Yeah, I don't want to do that.
I'm going to go black market.
Is there a waiting period?
For what?
For a gun?
Rifle?
Yes.
Not a rifle.
Federal.
I don't want a rifle.
For a handgun, for any kind of firearm. There's a gun.
There's a waiting period.
They have to find out if you're crazy.
They have to find out if you're a felon.
It's running from the law.
They have to find out if you're really Brendan Shaw.
Google me, bro.
Give me a goddamn gun.
Google me, bro.
Give me a goddamn gun.
You could get a gun, man.
It wouldn't be any problem.
But Joey Diaz can't get a gun.
Joey Diaz is a felon.
That makes sense.
Yeah, if you're a felon, you can't get a gun.
I mean, that's... Yeah, it's tricky, man. I love Joey Diaz,'t get a gun. Joey Diaz is a felon. That makes sense. Yeah, if you're a felon, you can't get a gun. I mean, that's...
Yeah, it's tricky, man.
I love Joey Diaz, but it makes sense.
If you just look at his record on paper...
Yeah, it's tough to sell that guy a gun.
Well, it just seems like a questionable move.
Legit.
I mean, there's a reason for the law.
You watch his podcast.
You ever watch the morning thing that he does?
Where he just chokes up?
He gets high, the morning joint.
Yeah. Is he still on Periscope He gets high, the morning joint. Yeah.
Is he still on Periscope?
Yes.
I stopped fucking Periscope, man.
Really?
Yeah.
Yeah, people got super excited about it, but the excitement waned.
It went away, and I was like, hey, you know what?
I don't like it either.
And then Facebook's doing video streaming, you know.
Really?
Yeah.
Oh, that's right.
They're on video streaming now.
That's right.
For however long you want.
Dude, we should start streaming on Facebook.
That's what people are saying.
Can we stream on Facebook?
And cut out the middleman, YouTube.
Well, YouTube's not bad, too.
We make money off YouTube.
Make money off ads.
They play ads.
Oh, for sure.
Podcast.
Yeah.
You can make money off videos.
I make money off my haters' videos.
People make mean videos about me, I put ads on them.
Tight move, Joe Rogan.
Tight move, man.
Shit.
That's fun money.
Keep on keeping on.
Yeah, it's all.
Ultimately, I mean.
Do you get that much hate, though?
Sure.
Really?
Sure.
I don't see it. Oh, you got Really? Sure. I don't see it.
Oh, you got to look around.
I don't see it.
Well, I don't look at forums and shit like that.
If people hate every show that is on the air, there's going to be a certain percentage.
Like we were talking about, you have a guy like, I was talking about that Milo guy, but
even you, or even Callan, or anyone who I love, there's going to be a certain percentage
of people that fucking hate them, can't stand them.
Everybody's not for everybody.
That dude went down from those fucking leg kicks, man.
Some big boys.
That dude on the left is throwing some nasty leg kicks.
That white guy's getting ate up.
He's down from those leg kicks.
Some really big boys.
Some really big boys.
When you see good high-level kickboxing,
it makes you realize a lot of the kickboxing that you see in MMA,
especially at this level, it just doesn't compare.
Look at what you're watching here.
These guys are going wild. That guy's holding himself up.
Homeboy wants out.
Yeah, he does.
Kick one more time, son.
That left leg kick.
For sure don't bend over like that.
Yeah, when he kicked that left leg, you could see that thunderbolt of pain go up into his dome.
Yeah, people hate everything, man.
There's somebody out there that hates fucking Led Zeppelin.
Somebody out there that hates Bob Seger.
There's somebody out there that wants Billy Joel to jump into the river and drown his own feces.
As long as it's 60-40, you're good.
But if everyone hates you, you might just be fucked.
I don't even think 60-40 is good.
40-60?
I think what's probably good is like 80-20 or 70-30.
Yeah, it should be on the higher end for sure.
Otherwise, you're just a dick.
60-40 is like, hmm, maybe you need to tighten up your fucking game a little bit.
Tighten it up.
You suck.
And it's also like there's a problem with doing things like a podcast
because you're talking and you might have an opinion
that is not the same as the person who's listening to you,
and they can't talk back, and it's fucking frustrating.
You're talking some shit about maybe some music that they love
or some food that they love or whatever the fuck it is,
and they're listening and they get mad.
Like, I'm fucking tired of listening to this bullshit.
You know, you fucking idiot.
You don't know shit.
And it's because it's an intimate relationship,
but it's very one way.
True, but however, if you listen to a hundred Joe Rogan podcasts,
the Joe Rogan Experience,
you listen to a hundred and one of them piss you off
and then you become a hater off that one,
lose my fucking number.
That doesn't necessarily have to be the case.
They could be a hater
from the jump, you know?
Oh, well,
then they're just a hater.
Then they're looking
for any reason.
There's just always
a bunch of...
I'll tell you what, man.
The smartest thing
I ever did was that podcast.
Before that,
I got so much hate.
So much fucking...
People hate me,
and I get it.
I mean,
I dress like Jay Leno,
and I got a fucking part
in my head.
You know what I'm saying?
Like, I get it.
The part looks good.
Yeah, it depends who you ask.
I like it. It looks like a giant Tobey Maguire. It just what I'm saying? Like, I get it. The part looks good. Yeah, it depends who you ask. I like it.
It looks like a giant Tobey Maguire.
It just depends.
People hate, you know?
They don't.
They don't matter.
No, I agree.
They don't matter.
I'm just saying the best thing I ever did was the podcast.
Because people are like, oh, he's not that big of a dick.
Yeah.
Well, they didn't understand a lot of, like, when you would say things.
Like, this is just your personality, your sense of humor.
Like, they think this guy, like guy really thinks he's the shit.
Well, yes and no.
Yeah.
Like, in a way, yeah, but in another way, no.
Not really.
Like, he's having fun.
Yeah.
Like, this is fun.
Yeah.
What is this Kevin Hart and this soccer player thing?
David Beckham.
This soccer player.
This soccer player that they always try to sneak in on us.
Not buying it.
I get it.
David Beckham.
I get it. He's cute.
Whatever. Get out of here.
Well, whatever he is, get out of here.
It's not working. Hello, I live
in America. Land of the free, home
of the brave. We don't give a fuck who
the world ping pong champion is, okay?
What's soccer, bro? Same thing.
He's the captain of England for a long time.
Darts. Who gives a fuck?
His fate was sealed when he came over to LA.A. to play with the Mexicans.
His fate was sealed.
They didn't even give a fuck about him.
A few, like, really horny girls.
We got him late, bro.
A few really horny girls in their 30s came down because they were, like, super attracted to him.
But it didn't work.
Dude, David Beckham does work, son.
No, I'm saying it didn't work as far as, like, getting us to buy into soccer. No. It did not work. It did not work. We paid him, like, one jagillion, I'm saying it didn't work as far as getting us to buy into soccer.
No.
It did not work.
It did not work.
We paid him like $1 jigillion.
Yeah, it didn't work.
And like seven people showed up.
No one gave a fuck.
No one gave a fuck.
They're like, this is still soccer.
David Beckham is our ticket.
What we need is a recognizable face.
We got him too late.
We got him too late.
It didn't matter if he's fucking Diego Maradona in his prime.
And he's got a dick that's made out of gold.
It doesn't matter.
It's still soccer.
Soccer's tough.
Yeah.
If that guy was playing baseball,
holy shit.
What?
He would make A-Rod,
you know,
I mean,
the damage that guys like A-Rod do,
I mean,
he would make that look silly.
I agree.
I agree.
He looks way better.
He's a beautiful man.
Oh,
the dying piece.
He's all tattooed up too,
but he doesn't have the build. That too. But he doesn't have the build.
Doesn't have the build.
Because in soccer, it's like not important to have muscles.
Bitches get that skinny look I feel like.
Some bitches.
Maybe.
The ones you don't want to fuck.
You're probably right.
Oh, 100%.
Yeah.
What do you want those?
Nah.
Those girls who want a guy that's tight.
He's tired all the time.
A guy like a little weak frame.
A guy who gets neck pains.
That's not what they want. No, that's not what they want. They want a big brown. A guy with a weak frame. A guy who gets neck pains. That's not what they want.
No, that's not what they want.
They want a big brown on top of them.
They want that super athlete
dick.
There's the stoppage of that fight.
Some girls like real skinny dudes
in all seriousness. Some girls like dudes
that look like they don't eat.
I saw a study
where the most appealing for women was like kind of that
dad bod, like not a real ripped dude, but not a fat dude.
You know who wrote that study?
Some fat dude was trying to get some pussy.
It's bullshit.
They're trying to-
Are you hating on whoever wrote that because you're ripped?
What they're doing is they're trying to get into the heads-
Where they say it's okay.
Of all the women out there and like hypnotize them.
That's true.
Well, they already did it with the fucking skinny bitches,
the models that look like coat racks.
Girls look at those models and think that's what they need to look like.
For other girls, not for guys.
Right, but they think that's what they're supposed to look like.
If they just wanted to look good for guys, they would listen to us,
and they would just be doing squats, and they would be eating pasta all day.
Rice every night.
Rice, squats. Potatoes. Rice, squats. Sour cream. Boom. Sour cream. Pork chops. doing squats and they would be eating pasta all day every night rice potatoes
rice sour cream boom sour cream pork chops don't be scared of pork chops don't be a basic bitch
carve up and run stairs you gotta work those glutamate maximuses but to like women who like
look at those like really tall thin women they think they think that that's what they have to achieve.
Who the fuck?
Who the fuck?
It's from television, man. It's from movies.
It's from books. It's from magazines,
rather. So what do the guys get?
We look towards what?
The rock and shit? Muscle fitness?
Yeah, there's that.
And then there's like
ridiculously ripped people, like guys who are just like super shredded six-pack guys are sitting around.
Almost like you know that guy, when he took that photo shoot, didn't eat for at least a day, dehydrated himself to show his abs.
Oh, he was on an eight-week fucking cut to get there. When you see ads and guys look insanely ripped and they have like chiseled six packs, either
they're a freak of nature, which is occasionally you have those, a guy who just looks insane
no matter what he does, like the Kevin Randleman look, you know?
True.
Or.
Oh, you mean black people.
That's what I was going to get to.
Sorry, bro.
Sorry.
Sorry.
You got a guy who is preparing for a photo shoot who's in a very unhealthy and dehydrated state.
You know, when you see those guys, for people that don't know, if you watch bodybuilding and you see those guys and they're on that podium, that stage, and they're flexing and you see the striations, they will black out.
If you made those guys run up a hill, they would literally black out and fall down.
They have zero endurance.
They would die if that competition lasted four days.
Oh, yeah.
They'd be dead.
They'd be dead.
They'd be dead.
If it was like an endurance thing where you had to keep the competition going over days and days, they would be gone.
Dead.
They would be gone.
Yeah, they don't look like that.
Yeah.
It's not healthy.
You can't do that.
So if men had a body dysmorphia thing, it would be about being ripped.
Like that's why when that girl was fucking with you.
100%.
And saying you were soft.
She's saying you don't look like this unrealistic person from these magazines that I finger myself to.
And I said, bitch, you don't look like Nicki Minaj.
What are we going to do?
What are we going to do?
But Nicki Minaj, she wasn't even popular. Back then she wasn't popular. Didn't really work. And I said, bitch, you don't look like Nicki Minaj. What are we going to do? What are we going to do? But Nicki Minaj,
she wasn't even popular.
Back then,
she wasn't popular.
Didn't really work.
I probably said.
Did you guys have
an argument over it?
No,
I was just like.
You were hurt?
Yeah,
and I was like,
sad,
sad.
I stayed this girl
used to tell me
about her ex-boyfriend.
She dated this
big giant bodybuilder dude
that he used to pick her up
and fuck her up
against the wall. Hey man. Do you really think I want to hear that? Yeah, don bodybuilder dude that he used to pick her up and fuck her up against the wall.
Hey, man.
Do you really think I want to hear that?
Yeah, don't want to know that stuff.
Why do you want to tell me about some big guy who used to pick you up and fuck you against
the wall?
Because I can pick you up and fuck you against the wall.
You're not that big.
Yeah, no.
If you want to do that.
It's not special.
Yeah, I'm strong enough to do that, but I don't need to know about other dudes fucking
you.
I like to pretend.
Specific way that you really like.
Dude, I pretend my girl, I'm the first one.
I don't fucking picture any of that, man.
I used to do a bit about that, that every girl should say, is that what a dick looks like?
I'm so glad I waited.
That would be great.
That's fucking brilliant.
This is how I've always thought would be the best way to suck it, and then just do an ace five-star.
Porno style.
Just like, damn, girl. Shit. Wifey. And you're like, wait a minute. How'd you learn? way to suck it and then just do an ace five-star or no style just like damn girl yeah wifey and
you're like wait a minute how'd you learn hold I don't want to know I don't want to I don't want
to know I'll just pretend you fucking learned it off videos dude speaking of uh speaking of dicks
did you see speaking of dicks Justin Bieber's dick is that gonna bring out I knew it. I knew it. I knew it. I knew he was going to bring up his dick.
Dude.
He's got a good dick.
Good-sized hoggy on him.
Kid's happy.
Kid's killing the game, bro.
Do you think that maybe he pulled it out a little, fluffed it up?
Got a little blood flow?
Knew everybody was going to see it.
He had that dime piece of a girl waiting on the couch, so I'm sure he boned her.
He's Justin Bieber.
No one's like, you know what?
I'm going to get butt naked, play some guitar on the balcony, and someone caught him.
Like, I don't think he's walking around with that big old hog like that.
That's true.
But also maybe-
He's gifted, though.
Maybe he doesn't give a fuck.
Maybe when you have $300 million and you're 19, you're like, maybe I'll just go show my hog to everybody.
For real.
Take my hog out for a walk.
Take my hog out on the balcony. Take this hog out for a walk. Take my hog out on the balcony.
Take this hog out for a little stroll.
And he's got to think, like, as famous as he is, that everything he does, he's constantly got people trying to take pictures of him.
You know what?
If you have that hoggy, though, it's like, fuck it.
Why not?
Let it out.
Yeah, let it breathe, bro.
Let it shine.
Quit hating on the dick.
That's a good point.
Yeah, right? That's a very good point. You know, legit point. Good for him. See, that's something. Let it shine. Quit hating on the dick. That's a good point. Yeah, right?
That's a very good point.
You know, legit point.
Good for him.
See, that's something.
Forget about squats.
Forget about tit implants, lips.
There's not a goddamn thing you can do.
Nothing.
Isn't that incredible?
That if you look at the game, the genetic game, all right,
that one of the number one things is dick size.
Number one things.
Number one.
One of the number one things. And that is Number one things. Number one. One of the number one things.
And that is the one fucking nut that science can't crack.
We could put a man on the moon.
We can send video from your fucking cell phone to a dude in Australia instantaneously.
You could download Netflix on the ride to the airport.
I mean, you're pulling movies out of the sky.
You can do some shit. God sky. You can do some shit.
God damn, you can do some shit.
You could Skype with people that are on the other side of the planet. Talk to them in real time.
Look at them like I'm looking at you.
That's all possible.
Can't fix that dick. Can't fix that dick, bro.
Sorry.
How close are you getting?
Not close, man. We can't figure shit out.
We could cut the tendon in the bottom and stretch it out, but I mean, whatever.
Good luck with that, though.
It gives you maybe half an inch.
My buddy, I won't say his name, obviously, has a small dick.
I was at his house a while ago, found a dick extender for his girl.
He saw me see this fucking adapter.
I just looked at him and said, I get it, bro.
I get it. I could have roasted him and said, I get it, bro. I get it.
I didn't.
I could have roasted him hard, hard for having a tiny dick and having a dick extender.
Now, when you say a dick extender, like a rubber dick that you put on top of your actual dick?
Yeah, to help your girl out.
Because he has a tater tot dick.
So he put this thing on top of it.
It's a bummer, bro.
Me being the nice guy, I just looked i get it it's just it is carry
on with your night it is what it is man it's a bummer man you can't do shit like if you're real
skinny all right whatever you can lift weights eat right maybe even buy some steroids we can
figure some shit out like you said your dick we got 3d printing where we're making all sorts of
fucking new organs whatever the fuck you want.
We can't do dicks.
I got a question.
Yeah.
When you see, like, women that are bodybuilders and they take steroids, their clit grows and their clit becomes like a dick.
Yeah.
Do you think if a dude got on some crazy-ass fucking steroids, would it make his dick grow?
Like, if you got on some wild silverback Mark Coleman 1996 type steroids.
You have to ask Mark Coleman.
Some top of the fucking food chain Alexander Carellon type shit.
Some Puget Husky.
Wouldn't your dick grow?
I feel like it would.
I think it would grow.
Your balls are going to shrivel up like raisins, but your dick is going to be fat.
Your balls are going to have to step away from the game.
They're not doing the job.
You know, it's like, what if you have a four-cylinder engine in your race car,
and someone comes along and says, listen, we've got one or two choices.
We can either take out this bitch-ass four-cylinder and put in this LS7,
six-point-whatever-liter-motherfucking-fire-breathing-dragon engine,
or you can keep up with your
bullshit fuel economy and that shitty putt putt what are we gonna do are we here to win races
well you take that crazy you know mark kerr circa engine 2001 you know mark the smashing machine
at his peak take some of that stuff bro i think know, I don't know if your dick grows longer
I think it might get fatter might get bigger to miss the girls clit gets bigger
Is this Dustin Jacoby next is that next? Oh, that's a good fight. That's the that's co-main event beautiful
Denver product. Yeah, he's a tough kid man UFC too, right? Yes. He did tough kid. Um, I
Wonder I would yeah, I think genetic engineering he did. Tough kid. I wonder.
I think genetic engineering
is going to be where
it's all at.
That's what's going to fix
Yeah,
we'll get there
pretty soon.
Everyone's going to be
walking around with
fat asses,
big dicks,
giant dicks,
big noses.
Yeah,
I used to have this bit
about big dick pills
that if big dick pills
really worked,
it would take about
30 minutes for the first
guy to die of an
overdose.
And then, I go, because die of an overdose and take one big dick pills work it take one makes my dick grow what if I take all of them how much do I take before I die and I'll take one less than
that yeah this fucking party roller I was like that there's a Jacoby fighting
that guy that we just saw
that won earlier
right there.
Jacoby's one of the guys
that beat him.
The guy that we saw earlier
that knocked out
Bang Bang Allman.
Yeah, these last two fights
are going to be dope.
Yeah.
And Wayne Barrett's bad,
motherfucker.
He's very good.
Super athletic.
Real quick.
Real sneaky, man.
Really, really good athlete.
Good boxer, too.
He's a good boxer
before he got into kickboxing. He's a real good athlete, too. He's a good boxer before he got into kickboxing.
He's a real good athlete, too.
There's a lot of real good guys at the high level in this.
I mean, you know Schilling.
I wonder how it works with Glory.
Are they contracted to Glory where they can't fight anywhere else?
He fights for Bellator, too.
But, you know, Bellator and Glory are friendly, but can he fight elsewhere?
Can he fight over in Japan or in Thailand?
I don't know how his contracts are.
I wonder how those contracts are.
I don't know.
Because it has to be tough for a lot of guys.
Paul Daly now, too, though.
They have Paul Daly.
Yeah.
He's in both, Bellator and...
Like I said, that makes sense for those guys.
It's just, whatever it is, for whatever reason, Bellator has been around for a long time now.
Okay?
It's been around for several years.
Bellator has been around for a long time now, okay? It's been around for several years and for whatever fucking reason it just has not caught on
The way the UFC caught on in like the early 2000 never well
That doesn't make sense to me. They don't have the stars on the depth. They don't have the production
But they don't have the money they have Viacom money, and that's crazy money
Well, why doesn't Viacom say look we could either have this middling product
crazy money. Well, why doesn't Viacom say, look, we could either have this middling product where we're always going to have good guys like Phil Davis and Tito Ortiz and Shlomenko
and good fighters, or we can go balls out and we can get the really good guys.
Like who? What are you going to do?
Anybody that's in contract negotiations. Chad Mendes was talking to them. When Chad Mendes
had his contract was about to come up,
you don't think that he got offers?
I don't know what his deal was, and I don't think he was even thinking about going,
but you don't think that Rampage went over there?
You know, Rampage is in a lawsuit right now where he's got to figure out
where he's going to fight again.
If he is ever going to fight again.
The UFC said they would let him go.
Oh, really?
Yeah, they said, look, we understand that you're in this big lawsuit with Viacom,
and Viacom's threatening to sue the UFC.
He said, we'll let you go.
You can go and fight for them.
That's dope, man.
That's cool for them to do that.
I think they're offering to settle.
I think Viacom's offering to settle.
Because they did violate his contract.
They did, 100%.
And he did fight Fabio Maldonado afterwards.
The judge cleared him to fight.
So I don't know what the specifics of the case was,
but the last that I read was that
You're looking at a 10-year investment where we're going to have to get these young guys
from the UFC, and then we're going to have to recruit the younger guys who come up.
Because guys come up through the ranks, right?
Like Phil Davis or the Ultimate Fighter came up through the Ultimate Fighter, a bunch of
guys did.
They have to figure out kind of their feeder system.
Because right now, all they're doing is biting off the UFC, really.
Let's be honest, really.
Yeah.
They're putting on B-level, C-level shows that the UFC put on five, six years ago.
Yeah.
Phil Davis is kind of the first guy who's in his prime who went there.
You know, but Phil Davis isn't a knockout artist.
I love Phil.
Well, Phil Davis just knocked out, what's his face?
Hold, hold.
He's from Montreal.
Francis Carmont.
Carmont.
Carmont.
And Carmont's a very good fighter.
And Davis beat the shit out of him, man.
I knocked him out.
He looked nasty.
No, Davis fucked those dudes up.
It's like he turned a corner, you know?
Did he turn a corner or is he fighting lesser competition?
Both.
I think both.
I agree.
I think Davis is getting better.
And I think Davis is in his prime.
And he's going to run that show for a very, very long time.
I was super impressed when he beat Glover.
I was like, wow, that is a big victory.
But I think Glover had a shit camp.
I really do.
Still a big victory, though.
Whatever excuse Glover makes, that's a huge victory.
100%.
But I was disappointed when he lost to Bader.
But then when you see the way Bader beat Rashad, you're like, look, Bader, you need to consider Bader the way he is right now.
Don't consider how Bader got knocked out by Glover or Bader that got knocked out by Machida.
Bader's won, what, five in a row?
He's won five in a row and looked fucking real good.
But guess what's next for him, though?
You're a motherfucker, Anthony Johnson.
Yeah.
Couldn't be a worse matchup for Bader.
Is that happening?
Because Rumble asked for it.
Well, I think that's what's next for him.
Because what are you going to do?
You're going to sit out and wait for John and DC to fight?
Who knows how long that's going to be.
They're going to make you fight.
Rumble's terrifying.
Rumble's terrifying, and I can't think of a worse matchup for Bader.
And I love Bader.
But if I'm Bader, I'm like, God, if I'm Bader, I'd rather fight John Jones than Rumble.
I can't think of a worse matchup for him.
There's some interesting fights at 205.
Real interesting. Real interesting. I was really think of a worse matchup for him. There's some interesting fights at 205. Real interesting.
Real interesting. I was really surprised how well he shut Rashad down. I was really
surprised. I was like, wow.
Bader has really turned a corner.
I think that's a tough fight to
say that. Well, it is
because Rashad had two years layoff,
but Bader looked real
good. I'm only basing it on how
good Bader looked. He looked real good.
He looked real smooth with his stand-up.
He's getting way better.
His jab is nasty, man.
His jab is opening up a lot of the other aspects of his striking
because he's developed a rhythm with his jab
where his jab has become so fluid and efficient
that he can kind of half out there.
He can half it and then pop you with it.
He's landing it in a more diverse
way than he ever did before.
He has more proficiency, like his proficiency
with his jab. I agree. He looks great.
Co-main event,
Wayne Barrett versus Dustin Jacoby.
Bader does look great.
I think it's tough
to base it off the Rashad fight.
I agree with you. That was a real tough fight for Rashad. I think Rashad would have done it off the Rashad fight. I agree with you.
I agree with you.
That was a real tough fight for Rashad.
I think Rashad would have done better to have a fight with someone who wasn't in it.
A warm-up or something.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
But think about Bader, man.
Think what Bader's come from.
Remember when he lost to fucking Tito Ortiz in his two in a row?
Remember when he lost to Tito Ortiz?
Remember when Tito Ortiz was like, how did I can hit him?
And he, like, fell down.
Well, he hit him, and then he choked him.
Submitted him, yeah.
Yeah.
But that, you know what, man?
That was a motherfucker, man.
Tito Ortiz, if he's on and he catches you, he's still Tito Ortiz.
Oh, he's Tito Ortiz.
One of the best of all time.
Everybody's got to remember, he was at one point in time the motherfucker.
Baddest guy on earth for a while.
I mean, not really because Chuck was always out there.
We always knew that Chuck was out there.
But before he fought Chuck, when you think of what he did to Evan Tanner,
you think of the beatdowns he put on Ken Shamrock.
Yeah, man.
Tito was bad.
He's one of the first guys to ever use a one-arm guillotine.
He choked out Yuki Kondo in Japan.
Remember that?
Well, think about—
Was that Japan?
I think it was.
Well, think about Bader, though.
He was two losses in a row and just lost to Tito Ortiz.
He was, like, on the chopping block, man.
I remember just being like, damn, really, Bader?
Well, that dude just kept working.
And then, boom.
Dustin Jacoby is going after Wayne Barrett.
This is a dangerous fight for Jacoby because Barrett has fought more elite competition.
Like, he's fought Joe Schilling, beat Joe Schilling once, lost to Joe Schilling in the last fight,
knocked Joe Schilling down.
Like, he's dangerous. Joe Schilling once, lost to Joe Schilling in the last fight, knocked Joe Schilling down.
He's dangerous.
And Jacoby is, I forget, the Brazilian cat that he got knocked out by.
Dude, did I say McNichols Arena?
That arena's been shut down for literally 15 years.
That's Magnus Arena, my bad.
Magnus.
McNichols is old school where UFC, like, two and three happened.
Dude, this is a good fight.
Wayne Barrett. He's slick, man. Look at. Dude, this is a good fight. Wayne Barrett.
He's slick, man.
Look at that.
Whoops.
Not here.
Ooh.
Yeah.
Jacoby's, like, super aggressive, too. I forget the dude that he fought, this badass Brazilian cat.
It was Dustin Jacoby's record.
A badass dude who caught him with a left hook.
Dude, it's tough because Jacoby came to the UFC and just struggled, right?
Because you can't fight like this.
It's tough to get off like this.
It's a different style fighting with the small gloves.
That's for sure.
Who did he lose to?
That's MMA.
Yeah, that's his MMA.
That's all MMA.
See if you can find Dustin Jacoby's kickboxing career.
Good duck under.
See how slick he ducked under that looping right hand?
Yeah.
It's just the big gloves thing, the defense is so much different.
Oh, 100%.
That's what happened with Schilling.
In Schilling's last fight, he got caught with that Superman punch by that dude.
That was bad.
Ooh, it was ruthless. Shit happens. But those punches, they punch by that dude. That was bad. It was ruthless.
But those punches, they come down on angles.
There he is.
Damn, that stretch from 13 to
15 was tough.
Why can't I read that?
Casey Green,
Ariel Pereira?
Alex Pereira?
He lost to Pereira. Yeah, that's who it was. It was Pereira. Damn,ira? Yeah. He lost to Pereira, yeah.
Yeah, that's who it was.
It was Pereira.
Damn, he's fought all over.
Yeah.
It's a totally different style of defense when you're using the small gloves.
The big gloves give you so much more leeway to catching punches,
and the punches themselves are bigger, the gloves are bigger.
So the punches are coming at you.
It's a larger object coming at you,
and you have a larger object to catch that larger object.
And all that shit is shrunken considerably when you put those MMA gloves into the mix.
Oh, dude, night and day.
It'd be like these guys fighting with their hand wraps on.
It's a completely different game.
What do you think about the idea of no gloves?
It won't work.
No?
Well, if you hate money and ratings, it'll work.
You know what I'm saying?
Like, it's rough enough now being mainstream.
I don't think we're still mainstream.
I think we're still working on that with the top sports.
You take gloves off, and these dudes are bare-knuckle fucking dudes up.
Yeah, it makes sense to us, right?
It makes sense to the educated people.
But, I mean, Mid-America sees that shit, general people.
They're like, what the hell?
This is so barbaric.
Right.
That's the only thing.
Yeah, maybe.
I don't know, man.
I mean, why is it barbaric to punch in the face and not barbaric to knee in the face?
Joe, I'm with you 100%.
Take the gloves off.
It's safer.
It is. It is. I'm
with you. However, marketing-wise,
good luck selling that. They're like, hold up.
We're going back to the Kimbo Slice backyard brawl
days? I thought we were moving forward.
Well, you would have a lot of dudes breaking their hands, too.
That would be a real problem. It would be a real problem
for longevity of your career.
People think I'm exaggerating. Listen,
take away the hand wraps. Take away
the wrist wraps. No wrist wraps.
Because I think one of the flaws of the human hand for punching is the wrist.
It's hard.
Like you have to have real discipline to punch hard.
And you have to practice hitting things bare knuckle to really develop that rigidity in your wrist when you deliver the impact of a punch.
Because most people, when they hit things, their wrist bends back and twists sideways.
Most people don't know.
They wind up breaking their hands.
They hit with the knuckles, the outside.
Well, that's why Boss would open hand slap pitches.
Well, he had to.
That's why he started doing that.
No, he was fighting in pancreas.
That's the only way he could fight.
He figured that was the rules of pancreas.
He also did it, though, when they had gloves.
He used open hand shit.
Really?
Yeah.
When they had gloves, he did that?
Yeah.
He would throw his hooks with an open hand, he said.
Interesting.
Yeah.
Huh.
Well, that's one of the reasons why he probably transferred so easily to Pancrase.
Damn, this is a good fight.
You know, one of the things that Boss figured out how to do in some weird way,
he figured out how to pull his hand back way far.
So when he was hitting guys, he was hitting them like a punch with the palm,
with the base of the palm, like right where it reaches, like where the palm meets the wrist
joint. He would pull his hands so far back, like unnaturally far. If you watch his fights,
it's kind of weird how far his hands go back. He was like the first freak athlete to get the,
I mean, he was a freak athlete, man. He was the first elite striker in MMA, in my opinion.
Him and Mo Smith.
But he was probably the first because with Mo,
he really didn't know any grappling to speak of.
When he first started fighting in Pancrase,
he really had to learn more grappling before we could see.
Like in extreme fighting, you got to see what his kickboxing was really like.
When he knocked out Conan Silveira, that's when everybody was like, oh, shit.
This is some next level shit.
And then when he came over to the UFC and beat Mark Coleman and won the title, people were like, okay.
This is what a kickboxer really looks like, a world class kickboxer.
Boss said he taught himself Jiu Jitsu.
That's madness.
Crazy, right?
He said he'd watch videos and teach himself.
Had a training partner.
Him and his training partner would learn on each other.
Come here.
I tried this on you.
How crazy is that?
I believe it.
Boss is crazy.
Savage.
He has some crazy ideas about conditioning, too.
He goes, when I would kick the bag, I would go 100%.
And how long can I do?
30 seconds?
100%.
Well, tomorrow I'll do 40 seconds, and then I'll do two minutes.
That's a crazy deal.
He would build it up so that he could get to, like,
whatever the round was.
He would just sprint.
God damn.
That's a different time back then.
Well, they didn't, you know, now people do Tabata when you do.
They do an elliptical and shit.
You do, like, intervals, like Tabata intervals. What is Tabata when you do. They do it on elliptical and shit. You do like intervals, like Tabata intervals.
What is Tabata?
It's like 20 seconds on, 10 seconds off.
That's the typical Tabata.
What I do when I do a sprint, like if I'm in a hotel and I have nothing but an elliptical
machine in the gym, I'll do sprints on the elliptical machine where I crank it up to
like a really high level and I'll do 30 minutes of thunder, Iical machine where I'll crank it up to a really high level,
and I'll do 30 minutes of thunder, I call it, or 30 seconds of thunder.
I was like, 30 minutes?
God damn.
30 seconds, well, 30 minutes for the whole workout.
But for the thunder, it's 30 seconds on, 30 seconds off.
It gives me something to do.
And those 30 seconds off, I'm like, oh, thank God.
I know it's coming.
I know it's coming.
Here comes that fucking 29, 28. It makes it go by faster, though. I think it's, oh, I know it's coming. I know it's coming. Here comes that fucking 29.
It makes it go by faster, though.
I think it's a better way to do it.
Yeah.
Because you're not so focused on the overall time.
You're more focused on 30, 30, 30, 30, 30.
Yeah.
It also gets you used to being just completely exerted.
It's a great way to get a cardio workout in on a piece of, like, when people think of, like, hardcore workouts,
you think of an airdyne or maybe a VersaClimber.
Those you think of as hardcore.
A VersaClimber, you can get the same kind of insane workout on an elliptical machine.
100%.
But people associate elliptical with you're watching the news and going slow.
When I use the elliptical machine, people look at me like there's something fucking wrong with me.
Yeah, I go hard in the paint on an elliptical.
I go fucking hard on the elliptical.
Hard in the paint?
Hard in the paint.
What does that mean?
Just like it's basketball terms, right?
Is it?
Hard in the paint, yeah.
Oh, the paint.
I go hard in the motherfucking paint.
Is this round two or three?
Three.
Round three.
Damn, Dustin Jacoby.
You know how guys have, we're starting to see a trend where guys are sparring less and less
because they realize the abuse in the gym?
Yeah.
That Rodriguez was saying how he only sparred three times, I think, in camp.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I think Brian Stan was saying that.
Yeah.
Three times.
Dustin Jacoby trying to wheel.
Dustin Jacoby really taking it to him, man.
He looks great.
He looks really improved, too, from the Pereira fight.
I think that knockout really taught him a lot about defense.
He's looking great in this fight, man.
Good leg kick right there.
Barrett's throwing with the freaking heart.
But look how easy it is to block punches with these goddamn big gloves.
It's such a different game.
It's so different.
Look at this.
John Wayne Parr, when he does that cage muay Thai, do they wear MMA gloves or do they wear?
MMA gloves.
Yeah?
He has a fight coming up, right?
He's coming out here soon.
He's fighting Black Dynamite.
I like that guy.
In cage Muay Thai, and he's out here fighting for the title.
In San Diego?
Yeah.
In Lion Fight.
He's going to fight for the title.
I like that guy, too. He's a good dude. Yeah, really good dude. Funny. going to fight for the title. I like that guy too.
He's a good dude.
Yeah, really good dude.
Funny.
Yeah, I got to work out with him, man.
Show me some...
How was that?
He's got a really interesting way of throwing punches.
He throws everything hard.
Even his jab is hard.
He makes it count.
His jab, he pulls back with his right hand.
Oh shit, Wayne Barrett went down.
What happened?
Oh my shit. Wayne Barrett went down. What happened?
Oh, my God.
He was touching the back of his head like it was a bad strike.
Damn, he's out of it.
Oh, he's super out of it.
That's it.
Whoa.
Dustin Jacoby knocked out Wayne Barrett.
And Wayne Barrett, he was pointing to the back of his head.
He pointed to the back of his head earlier in the fight, too.
Damn, Justin Jacoby. Congratulations. Good for you. What was I just saying? Fucking
John Wayne Parr. John Wayne Parr. He throws punches like this. He pulls back on his right
hand. This is how he throws a jab. He goes like that. I worked out with him for like an hour and a half.
Was that awesome?
Yeah, it was really fun.
He's a good dude.
He showed me a lot of cool shit, too.
A lot of cool shit.
Like the way he delivers knees is interesting, too.
Damn, that is legit as fuck.
Hell yeah, it's legit.
What is he pointing the back of his head for?
Let's see that again.
He got so fucked up, he don't know where he got hit.
He was getting battered before he got dropped there.
I mean, that was not just that one shot, either.
What happened?
Oh, they went to a commercial.
I wanted to see that knockdown again.
I don't miss boxing. Any boxing.
I watch fucking all of it. We have a
thing, right? Can we rewind that for a second?
I just want to see that knockdown
again. That'd be nice. I forgot we have
the DVR
up in this bitch.
Yeah, there it is. No, right before that, Jamie.
Right before that.
Oh. Right before that. There we go.
Here we go. This is the money maker. Here we go.
Boom. On the temple.
Boom. That's good. Chin.
Back of the head. Oh, that's 100% good.
That's the side of the head. That's the temple.
I'd say that's the back of the head.
Let me see that again. Where I come from, that'd be back of the head. Boom. Left hook. Bam. No. No chance. Broseph. That is the back of the head. That's the temple. I'd say that's the back of the head. Let me see that again. Where I come from, that'd be back of the head. Boom, left hook, bam, no. No chance. Bro,
Sif. That is the back of the head. Make it slow, Jamie. It's legal. It's legal, though.
Hold on. Make it go slow. That's a fucking temple, dude. Watch this. Bro, that would be back of the head. Hold on.
Make it slow. Isn't there a slow button? There's a slow-mo thing.
You press, like, pause and then, I don't know. Double pause?
I think pause and then fast forward
Isn't there like a small way you can do slow-mo pretty sure there is what is this no network connection cancel?
Oh, he says back. What happened here Jamie? Where am I pressing this to where's the receiver? It's in there
How does it work? Well, the receiver? It's in there? Yeah. Well, how does it work?
It's RF radio frequency.
Well, it's not reacting.
I think you've got to hit cancel on that thing.
There you go.
Okay, now it's working.
Yeah, that's for sure back in the head.
But it's legal.
You know what I'm saying?
It's in transition.
Okay, hold on a second.
So it's legal.
I'm going to take a look at it better.
Give me that first view.
Let's get a view of it in real time first.
Here it is right here.
This is where you can see the back of the head.
Boom.
Bam.
See, to me it looks like the side of the head.
Definitely not.
He's grabbing this.
He's grabbing this.
If this is the side of the head, then I agree.
No, that's not where he's grabbing.
He's grabbing his temple.
How do I make this thing go slow?
Let me see if i
can do this i think there's a way yeah here it is oh here we go okay okay get the old crazy eyes on
him okay ready here we go here's dustin jacoby moving in. Check it.
Mad pressure by Jacoby, too.
Good defense.
Look at that.
Good defense there.
Barrett tried to swing that right hook around.
This left hook.
And Jacoby, bang, catches him here.
100% clean there.
That side of the head.
Side of the head, which is legit, right?
Correct.
Okay, let's see.
We get a good view of it here. And Barrett really relying on that right hand.
Boom.
Kind of catches him.
Grazes that nose.
That one gets blocked.
That one gets blocked.
So now he's coming over again.
Barrett is, or Jacoby is, misses that left.
And now here we go.
Here goes the back of the head.
Look at that.
Come on, son.
Bro, that's his neck.
Look where he's standing.
That's basically the back of his neck.
Look where he's standing.
They're standing staring at each other.
Homeboy moves, though.
So he moves his neck.
Wayne Barrett turns his head sideways, and he hits him right in the temple.
Bro, that's not in the temple.
It's right here, side of the head.
Look at him.
It's not the back of his head.
He's not touching right there. He's not touching there. Unless he has a hook the head. No. Look at him. It's not the back of his head. He's not touching right there.
He's not touching there.
Unless he has a hook for an arm, there's no fucking way that's hitting the back of his
Look at where it makes impact.
Look at that right there.
No.
Look at it right there.
It's bouncing off the side of his head, and you see the fist appear behind his head.
Bro, that's here.
One more time.
One more time.
Let's watch it again.
Watch this again.
Boom.
That's one.
And there's the right hook.
Misses.
And there's the left hook over the top. Misses. Misses. And here it comes. That's one. And there's the right hook. Misses. And there's the left hook over the top.
Misses.
And here it comes. Here it comes. Look.
They're standing right at each other.
And the punch comes.
Watch where the punch comes.
Straight. Look at that punch.
Back of the neck. That's not touching him right now.
Incorrect. This is a straight punch.
Right? It lands on the side
of his head and then it glances off the side of his head,
and you see the fist behind the head.
You don't think that's the impact out there?
No fucking chance.
Oh, I disagree.
That is not hitting the back of his head.
That is hitting the side of his head, and you're seeing the punch.
With the glove, it's like here, Joe.
Look.
Like here.
Yeah, that's legal, dude.
No, it's not legal.
I think that's legal.
What are you doing?
What are you saying back of the head?
That's the side of the head.
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
That's the side of the head.
If you go to punch me and I move like this and you end up hitting side and back of the head, that's legal.
But he's not hitting the back of the head.
So he didn't touch the back of his head.
He hit the side of his head.
No.
He touched side and back.
I don't know, man.
Boom.
That to me looks more like right behind the ear, which is totally legit.
The back of the head, to me, is a rabbit punch.
That's where the base of the head meets the neck.
So where's this, Joe?
That's the back of the ear.
That's legal.
That's legal even in MMA.
I think you're changing the game.
No, no, no.
That's back of the head, bro.
He's changing the game.
Yeah, but it's not.
Boom.
It's legal. That hit is illegal. Yeah, it's totally legal. Yeah, I agree. That's back to the head, bro. He's changing the game. Yeah, but it's not. Boom. It's legal.
That hit is illegal.
Yeah, it's totally legal.
Yeah, I agree.
It's legal.
Maybe I misunderstood.
Maybe I misunderstood.
I thought you were saying that.
Oh, we have miscommunication here.
That's all it is.
That's pretty slick, though.
Yeah, it was.
It's a big win for Jacoby, man.
Real big win.
Oh, shit.
Artem Levin, top of the heap.
He's out, though, huh?
Well, he's out for this fight.
You know, you look at that guy, you look at his body,
it looks a lot like Ari Shaffir's body.
Like, how is that guy such
a badass, you know?
Man of number four, huh?
Well, he's been fucked up by Joe
Schilling. That doesn't make any sense.
How is he so highly ranked?
Joe's two, though.
Well, Joe Schilling hasn't really lost
in glory other than the decision loss to Simon Marcus.
That wasn't in glory.
The decision loss to Artem Levin.
He beat Artem Levin by decision two.
And then the decision loss to Wayne Barrett.
Those are the fights that he lost in glory.
Unless Schilling's getting paid bank to compete in MMA,
for sure stick with kickboxing.
I agree. What the fuck are you doing? I think he just doesn't want to back off from a challenge
and he wants to be the best at everything he does. You know, that's how he got to be such a
badass kickboxer. I agree, but be a badass kickboxer. Don't be an average MMA fighter.
Well, it's just really hard to do everything, man. It's really hard. It's really fucking hard
to do everything. It's not possible. It's really possible. No, it's really not it's uh, it's a crazy game and the game of
Trying to be the baddest motherfucker in two disciplines. That is a crazy
Crazy game cuz we got the guys he's fighting aren't folks in on their off time grappling and wrestling
They're getting better at striking 100% That's what it's tough
Like when I see that I love you that, I love Joe Schill.
I see a friend of yours, he's a friend of mine, and I support him.
But when I see him do MMA, I'm like, what the fuck are you doing?
Well, you know what?
He knocked out Melvin Manhoef in MMA, but he was fighting a guy, Melvin Manhoef,
that even though he had a lot of success in MMA, he knocked out Mark Hunt.
He's a guy who's been knocked out a gang of times.
A ton, man.
Knocked out by Robbie Lawler in one of the most horrific knockouts
you've ever seen in your life.
He was winning that fight, too.
He was.
If you remember.
Robbie Lawler uncorked a nuke on his face.
From downtown.
Yeah.
Boom.
And his lights went out,
and he goes flat to his back.
So bad.
Then Robbie comes down on him when he's out.
Dude.
Boom.
Endo, Bisbee style.
And just blood all over his mouth.
There's blood coming out of his mouth Boom. Endo, Bisbee style. And just blood all over his mouth. There's blood
coming out of his mouth.
And he busted
his fucking lip open.
I think that,
you know,
Joe's just got that in him.
He just wants to be
a bad motherfucker
at everything he does.
Which is why he became
so good at kickboxing.
But I think there's
wisdom in your words.
He's one of the best
kickboxers on the planet Earth
without a doubt.
Hands down.
Hands down one of the best on planet Earth. But I Earth, without a doubt. Hands down. Hands down one of the best
on planet Earth. Average MMA
fighter. But losing the way he lost
to that Japanese cat, that half-Japanese dude
that he lost to. Who was that guy's name?
Where he got Superman punched?
Yeah. That guy was a beast, man.
That guy's really good. He's no joke, man.
He's good. No, his striking
is nasty. That fucking punch was
nasty, no matter how you slice it.
The punch was super nasty.
I agree.
Nasty.
I'm just saying it's still Bellator.
It is.
But that guy has only fought in Bellator that one time.
I mean, that guy could have easily been in the UFC.
And get ate the fuck up.
Like Kobayashi.
No, no, no, no, no.
You never know.
Psychic Kato.
Yeah.
Yeah.
We got about 10 minutes left before we're at three hours.
Yeah, Psychic Kato will get his ass ate up in the UFC. Oh, really? We about 10 minutes left before we're at 3 hours. Yeah, Psychic Cat will get his ass ate up and messy.
Oh, really?
We got 10 minutes left before we go to 3 hours.
So we're going to take a little break here, folks,
and we're going to have a very short part 2.
The part 2 will be so goddamn short.
It's 10, what is it, 9, 15 now?
Actually, we'll probably go to 10 o'clock.
We'll make part 2 like 45 minutes. We'll go to 10 o'clock. We'll make part two like 45 minutes.
We'll go to 10 o'clock.
So we're going to get the fuck out of here now.
The end of this podcast has come.
If you're annoyed by this, listen, this is just how these things go.
Whatever.
For sure, don't download part two.
Because for sure, we're just going to be talking about our friend Joe Schilling.
I love that dude.
So that's why we're here.
That's why.
This is the first Spike TV Glory event we've ever done a fight companion for.
100% for Joe Schilling.
This is what this is for.
Mauro Ranallo, cage side with Skeletor.
We'll be right back.
We'll be right back.