The Joe Rogan Experience - #754 - Brian Redban

Episode Date: February 2, 2016

Brian Redban is a comedian and the founder of the Deathsquad podcast network. Check out his newest podcast called "What Brian Redban Do" at http://deathsquad.tv & on Spotify under "Deathsquad"

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No, no, I mean. Oh, that he hurt his knee? That he hurt his knee. I wonder if he had to do it, like, you know, after he tore it. Like, he had to go back on in the ring on a torn ACL. I think if he did, it wasn't for very long. I think he just went ahead and got it fixed real quick. And then, you know, because if you get you get your acl fix and then give you like

these um pretty uh lightweight carbon fiber braces you could walk around in it like okay like it's not cool like it's not you don't want to go long distances but they can kind of brace you up pretty good with a minimal brace post-surgery you just got to be real careful with it you know you don't want to hurt it again i when i hurt my knee recently i had to go to cvs and get like one of those knee things for my knee i had to buy like a cane and so i have all these like neat dude how bad you hurt your knee pretty bad i couldn't walk on it to the point where i bought a cane the same knee that you had problems yeah yeah what was the original problem with it i have this problem where my knee pops out of place and like it for like a week or so I could almost not even walk on it.

It pops back in. Okay. It's only happened a few times, but it happened recently and it was so bad that I couldn't walk. I had to go to see him. When you go to CBS to buy a cane, all the canes are like feminine. Like they're, they all have glitter on them. There's not like an old man cane that's gray or something. No, it's all like sparkly.

It's a nice blue sparkly cane. What do you think that is? Is that a marketing move? Is there like a lot of ladies that are hurting themselves? I think, I don't know. I think it's just so old people can see it. Like they're like, oh, sparkly canes. I don't know. I guess when you get old, you don't care about if it's sparkly. Is that what it is? I don't know. You can see it. I have no idea.

It was weird. Hurting your knees is not good man it's not and i constantly think about it too because it's it always happens when i'm just like doing something mild like i'll turn to the side but i'll pivot on it or something that just pops out you probably have at the very least like something wrong with your meniscus it could be like uh i used to have this thing called a bucket handle tear and uh what it would be is, you know, like a bucket handle like flip over, you know, one way or the other. Well, it gets stuck, like flipped, like a piece tears and then it gets stuck, like wedged up. It's terrible. Yeah. And I had that where it was it was bad for a while.

It would just kind of give out on me. And then one day in jujitsu class, it just got wrapped up the wrong way, like upside down. Like my leg kind of got yanked in some way. My leg completely locked up. It was brutal. But it was a pretty quick fix. It's a way easier fix than an ACL. Because with an ACL, they have to replace your ligament. It takes a way easier fix than an ACL. Because with an ACL, they have to

replace your ligament. It takes a long time to heal. But with the meniscus, like six weeks later, you can do jiu-jitsu again. My old roommate had this thing where his shoulder would always pop out of place and he'd be like, oh my god, ow, ow. But then he would have to hit it against a wall to pop it back in. Like Mel Gibson

in Leap of Weapon style? Yeah, exactly. It was exactly like that. Damn, that'sapon style? Yeah, exactly. It was exactly like that. Damn, that's not good. Yeah. Yeah, see, like, stuff like that, they can fix that. You should get that fixed. Yeah. I don't know. I don't talk to it anymore. Doesn't that surgery suck?

Sucks. Is that the rehab? Yeah, people that have serious shoulder surgery are pretty universal in saying it sucks, depending upon how badly you fuck it up. But, like, you know, like a guy like Cain Velasquez, surgery are pretty universal and saying it sucks depending upon how badly you fuck it up but like you know like a guy like kane velasquez he's had it and he came back from it but it took a long ass time before he was fighting again you know those those are bad surgeries yeah and the knee one though man they might be able to just trim that shit like you should find out what it is

because if it's just a meniscus tear dude i'm telling you they go in there they scope it and if it's not that aggressive it's not a gigantic tear you'll you'll be fine it's only happened like three or four times my whole life so it's like i'm 41 it's fine if it happens as long as you just don't move a lot right exactly continue continue your sedentary lifestyle, semi-sedentary. Are you still doing your losing weight thing? Yeah, I just did my first month, finished my first month, and it was 17.3 pounds, I think it was. That's incredible.

Yeah, in one month. That's incredible. Yeah, it's incredible, but then I think, all right, I still have 23 pounds for two months. Don't think like that. Think that you're committed. Dude, that's amazing. That's a very impressive accomplishment. It's hard to do.

It is. I miss bread so much, though. I haven't had any bread since then. I haven't had any cheese or anything like that. I almost snapped the other day. I was just so hungry. I was like, I just can't eat chicken or vegetables anymore. Well, this is what it's like

it's like as you get older your body just sucks more and more at processing the kind of food that you love yeah your body's like dude enough with the fucking spaghetti jesus christ it's just like glue just it tastes so good though god damn it's good one thing i noticed though immediately all my acid reflex gone like all that like burping and and just like stomach acid completely gone from that i don't know if it's the uh cheese or if it's the bread or that's in that's fascinating man you know we had this uh guy on mark sisson the other day, and he's the author of The Primal Blueprint. And he was talking about he had irritable bowel syndrome, which whenever I hear that, I don't even want to know what that is. I feel like I have that.

What does it mean? It means that IBS gets shitty. Diarrhea all the time. All day. I usually have that, but that's from drinking. That's not IBS. That's just Jack Daniels. That's just death making its way through your veins.

The evil alcohol. Yeah, well, he told me that he cured it all by just eliminating grains. He doesn't take in very many carbohydrates at all. Like, he doesn't do any breads or pastas or things like that most of it comes from um from fruits and vegetables mostly vegetables right and meat like he was it was essentially saying that he had all these issues and obviously what works for one person might not necessarily even be as good for another person they say that there's different styles of human you

know the people who are your ancestors come from specific backgrounds your diet is gonna be like some I should find out that's bullshit though because you know I've heard that before that that's always seemed like bullshit you know you know what that it was like a recent study. They were talking about it, that there was like to eat like your DNA. You know what I'm talking about? Remember that thing? Like your genetic ancestors or something? Yeah, they were trying to like say, oh, you're a specific type and that type needs a lot of red meat. You know, you're this type.

That type needs a lot of carbs it seems like that makes sense getting some kind of like you know scan of your body of what your body needs or lacks or needs more of than other people it just makes sense right yeah it totally makes sense yeah especially if your your body's like developed like your ancestors developed in an area where they needed specific types of foods the ancestral diet that it. Should you eat like your ancestors? Is that it? I mean, this came out pretty recently. This was just at the end of last year. But I think, is this saying that there's more than one type of person,

more than one type of diet? I think this is just talking about a specific ancient diet. That's what I think this is. Because I think that's what the ancestral diet idea is. That's what I think this is because I think that's what the ancestral diet idea is. The idea this Mark Sisson guy was talking about that's really fascinating to me is that when you're taking in all these carbs, you're taking in a lot of sugar. And that when you eliminate sugar and eliminate inflammatory foods, your body operates more efficiently. It's just healthier.

It has more resources to fight off illness and inflammation and things like that. It's a fascinating concept. So I think it might not work for everybody. I don't know. What the fuck do I know? But I'm going to give it a shot for a little while. I'm going to see what it's like. It's pretty interesting because my diet went from McDonald to wendy's every day to pizza every day like i really had the worst diet ever and now it's just tons of vegetables a little protein and i don't feel

tired anymore i feel like i can feel the food work almost it's it's interesting how how just changing your diet from just crap to super healthy, how much you can feel it immediately almost. Yeah. It's incredible, right? And working out. Getting the endorphins. I've never had that in my life. Two hours later, I'll be like, why am I so happy?

I'm bouncing around. I've never felt that before. I've worked out before. I've never felt that. But for some reason this time around, I'm just like, well, oh my God, I'm happy. For no reason. I'm happy. It's so weird.

They've said that they've done studies that show that depression can be cured just as easily with alcohol. That's hilarious. With alcohol. Thanks, Joe. I'm out of here. With exercise, rather. Yeah. Then they were comparing it to people that got on SSRIs. and they were saying they were pretty similar results in a lot of people.

People that really started doing a lot of cardio, doing a lot of running and things along those lines. That's like something that's supposed to be specifically good. But you need kind of like both kinds of things for your life. You need like some kind of strenuous stuff, whether it's body weight stuff, you know, pushups or something like that, or anything that is really gets your, you know, your strength going.

And then you need some, something that's just cardiovascular. And when you do those things together, man, it's just, your body just relaxes, you know, it's more,

it's more, um, adaptable. It's more just loose do you have is your bedroom completely like blacked out like darkened like like when you wake up is it you see sunlight when you wake up in the morning or is it little very little i mean yeah why i just blacked out my room recently because i just got like I my window is Like right next to the sun you like when you wake up. It's just right there I've always done that in hotel rooms, and I've always felt like a creep Well I always feel like what I'm in a hotel room closing all the windows closing all the curtains There's something about locking yourself in a totally dark room in a strange place it's just bizarre it is and i took like i found like there was a little crack where

i couldn't like like my blinds didn't fix it or anything so then i went to the store the hardware store and they had like these decals where you can like put it on your windows i made my windows like uh stained glass thinking that way so now it's like I have this weird like blue room that just glows blue But it sucks though and like I was like why did I do this because now I have no idea If it's daylight or nighttime anytime in my room, that's not good. It's not good You need a circadian rhythm thing going on speaking of blue. Did you see that thing that I posted today? I retweeted rather it was about Some some blue lava.

There's a place in the world that has blue lava. Whoa. Dude. Why is it blue? I don't know. It's fucking Avatar. That's Narnia or wherever the fuck those people are from. Where were they from?

On Obtanium Island or something? Yeah. Where the fuck were they from? I can't remember the name. I can't remember their planet. It made me think of something. Have you ever heard of the Kentucky Blue People? There's something like that.

I'm looking this up. Kentucky Blue People? Someone told me about that and I didn't believe them. Is that like the Jersey Devil? Have you ever heard of the Jersey Devil? It's supposed to be like a flying demon that lives in the woods in New Jersey. Remember that guy that got poisoned and he was all blue?

I wonder if it... What's his name? The Russian guy? Oh, the guy that got poisoned and he was all blue? I wonder if it... What's his name? The Russian... Was it a Russian guy? And he got poisoned. Oh, the guy that got poisoned. Yeah. His face changed color.

Turned into Papa Smurf. Well, he had all that scar tissue all over his face. Remember that, too? Yeah, that guy. Well, that was the crazy guy that did the... That guy was using that colloidal silver shit. He was on Oprah. He passed away. recently, unfortunately.

From this? That guy, specifically. The guy that was on Oprah that was blue, he passed away recently. I'm pretty sure. I'll write a story about it somewhere. He says this was an entire family. Oh, that's different then. This is a different guy.

I wonder if that was their diet, too. Rare blood disorder. Oh, that's different then. This is a different guy. I wonder if that was their diet too. Or blood disorder. Oh, blood disorder. Weird. Why do I have to repeat that? Oh, blood disorder. Oh, blood. Like we don't speak the same language.

Oh, yes, blood disorder. Blue lava. No, the other guy was, yeah, there's the blue lava. But the other guy was blue because he drank colloidal silver every day because he thought it would like heal you know like fix diseases or something like that and um someone explained some scientists explained it might have been neil degrasse tyson i forget who it was but they explained why drinking colloidal silver would have that effect on your body I don't think it was Neil deGrasse Tyson I can't remember who it was but anyway they went

into this scientific explanation of why drinking colloidal silver can permanently stain your body purple like that guy he must have drank like massive quantities of it but I forget what the reaction is, but the reaction's permanent. Like, fucking what the fuck? Jesus. Oh, my God. I wonder if the blue is just like, like almost kind of like a fire that's around the lava that looks blue, kind of like a flame.

Oh, in this thing? Yeah, that's, wow. No, that doesn't look like. What is that? Makes no sense. Hmm. The gas vents, called fumaroles, which blast hot sulfur gas, stain the surrounding landscape a bright yellow,

and the ignited sulfur burns with a blue flame. Wow. My name is Ruben Wu. I'm a photographer and a filmmaker from Liverpool, UK, but currently based in Chicago. The blue flame is too dim to be seen in the daylight, so I had to wait until dusk for it to be seen. And the moonlight was dull enough to show the flames

as well as reveal the surrounding landscape. I also use long exposures in many of my images, which allows for pictures which show an extended period of time rather than a split second. I'm playing a horrible instrument while talking. Well, wait a minute. Why does that look so fake? He used a photo trick to, like you said. What was that? Is that a real photo? Was that real that we were just looking at? Really?

Why does it look almost like comic book-ish? Yeah, it does. Wow, these pictures are incredible. This is incredible. This photographer is fucking amazing. He has a good camera. Nowadays, nowadays. But look at this.

The fact that he's captured this shit, is he the first guy to ever capture this stuff? Is this something that people have known about? I want to see video of it live, though.

See, that's the problem. I wonder if this is just a photo trick, like, yeah, there's a little blue flame to it, so I might keep the exposure open a little, so it looks a little bit more blue

than it would with your naked eye. This is video. Oh. Yeah, I guess you're right. That just looks like fire or something. Yeah, that's kind of what he said it was. It was like the methane. The sulfur. Dude, it's incredible. It's incredible. They have sulfur problems

here in Los Angeles. You go through some of these places, it just smells like farts everywhere because of the sulfur. Sulfur? Yeah, I think it's sulfur. In Calabasas when I lived there it would it just smells like farts everywhere because of the sulfur sulfur. Yeah, I think it's sulfur In Calabasas when I live there it would sometimes it would just smell like Sulfur like eggs everywhere and it's because of sulfur Where's that? What it would is like a natural sulfur that comes out of the ground comes out. Yeah comes out of the ground and Speaking of that like what is up with that gas leak? Gas leak, yeah. Apparently, it's horrific.

Yeah, it's really bad, right? Yeah, and it's going to take them months to try to figure it out and close it off. It could get worse, right? Something could happen. It seems like somebody could accidentally smoke a cigarette and we blow up. All of us blow up. Yeah, I don't know how flammable it is. I don't know if it's something like that. I don't know if it's something like that.

I don't know if it's something that's easy to ignite. I don't know. But I know it's a health concern. I think there's a concern, too, that it might collapse further. Wow. They don't know exactly how to shut that thing off quick. It's going to take them some time and some engineering. Couldn't they just pour a shitload of concrete all over it and just walk away?

You can, man. It's gas. I don't know how they do this. I really, I couldn't even begin to wrap my mind, my puny little mind, around what kind of knowledge it takes to stop a fucking gas leak, a pipe. It's natural gas, too. It's different than like car, I'm kind of asking. I don't know. I thought leak, a pipe. It's natural gas, too. It's different than like car. I'm kind of asking.

I don't know. I thought it was a pipe. California gas hasn't dropped like it has all over the country. It's pretty. It was under $1 for a little while in Ohio. It's still well over $3, almost $4 someplace this year. People love to hear that. We're going back to the 70s, man.

It's great. But what do you think? I think it's a methane, though, isn't it? I don't think it's car gas, so I was kind of wondering. Yeah, I think it is a natural gas. I think that's the whole point. But it's a pipe, right?

Right. A pipe that pumps gas to all these people, and it broke. And they say that the hole is really big now. It's like they have this fucking eight foot wide hole. I think there's people that live around there that can't go home. Like they had to replace like a whole neighborhoods of people. And they still can't go home to this day.

No, they can't go home. That's crazy. No, they had to evacuate. 2.5 million pounds of methane every day? Let's be honest. Methane's air, so it doesn't really weigh anything. So it could be a billion pounds. 50 billion pounds of methane.

That's true. How do they measure it? It's a pound of air. Maybe it actually has weight to it. That's how you get to a pound. It still has to have weight. That's how you're measuring a pound. That's a to have weight. That's how you're measuring a pound. That's a lot then.

It has to be a lot. When it weighs nothing, it's a lot. It can float. It's like saying a ton of feathers and a ton of bricks. It's still a ton. Yeah, but this is 2.5 million pounds of shit so light it can float. So it's like the individual particles are very light. They're floating, right?

They're gases. Maybe we're getting scammed and we don't even know it. This Jackson guy is like, we need more money to get all those pounds of gas. Yeah, that's a very good point. Bro, you got to weigh the can. Got to weigh the can too, bro. Maybe that's what it pumps into things. And then now it's just blowing out into the air. Maybe that's how it pumps into things.

And then now it's like just blowing out into the air. Maybe that's how they're measuring it. That's what it pumps through there. The whole thing is nuts, man. Yeah, it says they tried using mud. They tried doing concrete. They tried covering it up. It didn't work.

You know what? When I hear they tried to do it, but it didn't work, I fucking freak out. I really do. That is like the last thing I ever want to hear when there's a national crisis. You know, well, they tried to do this, but it didn't work. Like, oh, Christ. Like, this is a hard one. This is not easy.

We're just so lucky there's smart people out there. We'd be so fucked. We would be so lucky there's smart people out there. We'd be so fucked. We would be so fucked. We're so lucky there's engineers that work on this kind of shit. You don't even think about it. We don't think about the streets. Think about the fucking highway system and you complain. You're like, oh, they're fucking working.

Jesus Christ, they got this lane cut off so they could fix the road. What the fuck? But think about how, in general, how fucking cool it is that we've hardened the ground and smoothed it out all across this motherfucker. And everybody's like, man, the fucking roads ruined the landscape. Absolutely. In a lot lot of places and this place is one of them right it looks like shit it's just a bunch of roads we overdid it we overdid it we got crazy we put too many roads in one spot too many buildings we we ignored the rules of having food nearby and vegetables and stuff we ignored all just said, no, let's just fucking pile on top of each other. Woo!

And that's what we did. But the idea is fucking amazing. The idea, like, when you're in a place like Montana and you're driving through these mountain ranges, the roads don't bother you, man. They don't bother you. You don't care if there's a road there. Because you're looking up at this insane natural beauty and you're just like, just fuck.

This is crazy. This is like the most insane artwork you could ever buy. Could never look as beautiful as this. Like really amazing artwork is always amazing to see someone's expression. And when someone does something that's really dope, it's cool. It gives us all this good feeling. Like, wow, that was amazing. That's a cool piece of art.

That's a beautiful sculpture. God, that's a pretty painting. But when you see the mountains, man, there's something about those things. Like a snow-capped mountain, you're like, fuck. And it's limited if you think about it. Yeah, like that. Look at that fucking view. That's not going to exist in 100 years, that view right there.

There's going to be so many drones flying around, Amazon Prime crap. There's going to be people with their hoverboards up in the air. That's not going to exist in 100 years, that view. Well, we would have to preserve it. That's what the idea of having public wilderness public forests they're the stuff that it's supposed to be ours that's what Teddy Roosevelt wanted to do way back in the day I mean when they instituted these ideas and got public land like signed off to to us so that like there's giant swaths of this country that are ours

as American taxpayers. And you can go camping in them. What's that? But does that include the sky in the future? It's probably not. That shit's going to be filled with advertising and stuff. There's going to be a drone that just sits there that just for years. They'll probably try

to make some laws against that if it becomes a real problem but like yellowstone like look at yellowstone national park that place is fucking amazing man and it's it's a incredible place to visit it's incredible like you have a real good chance of seeing like bisons and shit you got a good chance of seeing a fucking bear too you got to be real careful because um they've killed hikers like more than i think it was more than one attack and i know at least one dead over the last like five or six years because they think that these bears are getting too accustomed to being around people they know that if you break into someone's car they usually have food in there.

They know that coolers usually have food in them. They get smart. And so once they come around people once, like, fuck, then they start coming around all the time. I've been fucking with my neighbor. I do not want to admit this. Well, it's all funny. I don't know. But he must have got a new router because I have no where I got a new Wi-Fi like network to join and it's unlocked.

Right. So I just used it the other day just to see like how fast it was just in case if I needed to use it or whatever. I forgot that I had it. I think that's illegal. Is it? Yeah. Especially when you're admitting it. You can't be like, oh, I thought this was my router's other name. I think that's illegal. Is it? Yeah, especially when you're admitting it. You can't be like, oh, I thought this was my router's other name.

This is all a dream. I used to read Word Up magazine. Exactly. But I forgot that I had done it on my phone, and I've been connecting to it every time I come home. It just connects to his Wi-Fi. You know what I mean? So the other day, if you have Apple TV,

you can like play things on your Apple TV from your phone. It's called AirPlay. So I wanted to show a video to somebody and I did it. And I'm like, why is this not working? And I'm like, wait a second, what Wi-Fi am I on? I'm like, I'm on the other guy's Wi-Fi Apple TV. So like I've just been going YouTube, gay porn. No.

And the other day. Dude, that's illegal. You better stop right now. I've just been going, YouTube, gay porn. No. And the other day. Dude, that's illegal. You better stop right now. It's so fun to do, though. I was just like. Yeah, but it's super illegal. Is it? Yeah.

Playing gay porn. I guess it is. What if you had kids in there? I'm just playing gay porn. Yes. That's exactly what I'm saying. That dude's going to buy kids just so he can sue you. Right. Yeah, exactly. Wow. that's exactly what I'm saying that dude's gonna buy kids just so he can sue you right exactly

wow I love that shit that and printers like when people have printers on their wifi and you just print out dick pics all day on their printers that's rude as well that's rude as well let me ask you this

have you ever wondered if, like, we can feel Wi-Fi? Have you ever wondered, like, if we can feel electricity in a room? Like, maybe it's not enough where we can tell for sure if it was happening or if it's not happening, but enough where there's, like, there's just, like, a subtle underlying thing that your body's experiencing that doesn't really make sense. Like a radio wave. Like radio waves, Wi-Fi, satellites. Satellite radio and TV. Satellite signals.

GPS signals. What's all this? We're sure, for sure, is this not doing anything to us? Because we haven't really been doing that for that long. Is that something to be worried about? You know, if you take a cat who's the most sensitive animal ever, that cat's just sitting there, and you turn on something right next to it that has Wi-Fi, right next to his little whiskers, you would think it would even maybe twitch just a teeny bit.

I'm sure it doesn't. Do you think so, man, when you remote control your cat? You would think it would even maybe twitch just a teeny bit. You know, I'm sure it doesn't. I'm sure. Do you think so, man, when you, like, you remote control your cat? Hmm? If you, like, remote controlled your cat. Your cat would be like, hey, what the fuck are you doing to me, man? I think if there's anything, the cat would feel it.

I think if any animal, the cat would be the first thing that, I mean, the cat's tripping on ghosts, you know? Yeah, cats have amazing senses. Right. Except the sense, like, they're not intelligent. They're not intelligent like a person, but they have amazing senses. Like, their senses are off the charts, for sure. Yeah. I would think, if anything, a cat would be perfect. But I would think that their senses are only around to do what they need to do in the natural world. I mean, that's why the senses are sense of smell

They can feel things, you know, they're looking like feel the ground moving their pads on their paws are like really soft You know and they can they can walk like really quietly when they're sneaking up on shit like cats are fascinating little animals, man Hey, have you watched any of the cucumber videos the cats? It's probably one of my favorite thing for some reason reason, if you take, don't do this to your cat. Supposedly, it's mean. But if you take a cucumber, put it behind your cat when it's not looking. If the cat turns around and looks at the cucumber, it will freak the fuck out. Like something in its DNA makes it think it's a snake or something.

But there's videos, thousands of videos on youtube of people trying it almost all the time if a cat sees a cucumber just laying behind it it will jump up and run away or like break things have you seen these videos why a cucumber i think it's something in their dna that that just thinks it's like oh danger snake or or it's like some kind but for whatever reason somebody just found out by mistake that if you put a cucumber behind a cat, it'll freak it out. And then there's all these animal people that are like, don't do that. You're stressing your cat out. And I could see because all the cat's reactions are like death.

Like, get the fuck out of here immediately. It's pretty funny, though. It's some of the funniest videos you'll ever see is cat and cucumber on YouTube. Yeah, you don't want to freak cats out, man. They start pissing all over the place. Yeah, if you freak your cat out they will fucking piss in your pillow i don't sure i don't i haven't had a cat in almost a year and i don't miss the litter box i don't miss that smell i i don't think i might i might never get a cat again the litter box thing's a fucking real issue you have a box of shit in your house box of shit and cat piss

from ungrateful roommate that doesn't pay shit then gets mad at you when you try to trim their hair yeah yeah my cats get uh they get trimmed and they freak out about it it doesn't hurt them and i pet them the whole time when the lady's grooming them but uh one of my daughters is allergic to cats and it makes a big difference if you we trim the cat's grooming them but uh one of my daughters is allergic to cats and it makes a big difference if you we trim the cat's hair she doesn't have a bad allergy but it's certainly an allergy and she's been tested for it so when um i'm doing this i have to fucking just hang out with the cat the entire time like just chill man i'm telling you there ain't nothing it's just a

little massage with a little thing do you trim it or do you have somebody trim it? No, the lady does it. She's a professional. But it's weird to see them fucking freaking out about it. I had a cat once that loved it. She loved it. Spaz. Like, Spaz would just chill. Like, you would do it and she'd

just hang out. Spaz is not around anymore? I'm sorry. Spaz? not around anymore? I'm sorry. Spaz? Yes, she was 19. Damn. She made it a long time. That was a cool cat.

She's a very cool cat. I've been thinking, though, because I've lived with cats my whole entire life. I've been thinking of getting one, but I don't. The pee thing is a real problem, man. They get mad at you, they pee places. Yeah. For whatever reason reason and if you have another animal it's just a lottery if it gets gets along with the other animal or not it's a

total lottery especially cats cats usually don't get along with other cats like it took my 19 year old cat a solid five years to get used to oliver oliver is like the easiest going guy too. I love cats, man. They're cool. They're like having these weird little things that live with you. You know, these weird little warm love buckets. Just come over and just want love. They just want to cuddle with you.

Like my cat Oliver is brutal, man. I can't watch TV without this motherfucker demanding massages. He just like literally like head butts me drops his body into my lap rolls around. He like demands massages He's hilarious. You got a cucumber that cat. He's a funny cat man. My cat is funny as fuck. He's so smart He's just still like just likes to chill and hang out And the other cat of the fluffette, the white one, that one is, she's a little bit more assertive. It's funny. She attacks him. You know, cats will play fight.

It's always her jacking him. It's always her around a corner and like he'll be like hanging out and she'll be like he doesn't know that she's back there. So she knows he doesn't know. So her little legs start shaking and her tail starts flickering and she's moving real close. And then she pounces on him and fucks him up. And then he's like what the fuck bitch. And he backs up and they chase each other for a couple feet. It's hilarious man. But they're both such p a couple feet. It's hilarious, man.

But they're both such pussies because they're both ragdolls. Like, they're the nicest cats. Even when they fight, they don't even fight. Even when they fight, they're like, ooh, fucking bitch. They barely do anything to each other. They're like fake fighting. You know, they like each other. They have fun together.

Yeah, I mean, cats are some of the funnest Funniest animals that that is this I wish you could let him outside to shit though like a dog. It's just gross Yeah, they actually work pretty well actually you would think that that wouldn't work But I know like three people that do it and it worked almost immediately the great Robert Schimmel had a bit about it I bet it goes he goes you know they can drink. How's it go? He goes you know they can train cats to use your toilet He goes yeah great now when you have to go the fucking cats in there Well fuck it. I'll use this litter box and he goes then your friend comes over we show a fucking mountain lion for a pet

Robert Schimmel. God damn, I miss that guy. One of the first people I ever saw do comedy. He was so nice. God damn, that guy was nice. He was like one of the nicest people I've ever met. He was so friendly. Like every time I saw him,

it's always like a happy, like warm moment. It was so sad when that guy got sick and then to recover from that and then the car accident. It was fuck, man. Yeah. Boom!

There's a lot of people that, that, you know, like you go to the comedy store and you look at the walls of how many you know great comics that just fucking disappeared and i'll sit there sometimes and just google everybody's name that's on the wall like what you know see where they're at now and it's amazing how they just fall off like just disappear and never do anything. Like what happened to this person, this person, and this person? Yeah, I mean, people get lost in life and people move on to other shit too, though.

You know, sometimes people just decide they don't want the stress of performing anymore. Maybe they like other creative endeavors. You know, you and I talked about that for a while when you weren't doing stand-up. You know, you were making these funny videos. And you were like you know like well you know I'm already kind of a comedian you know it's just my audience is the internet when you were doing videos which that was an excuse because I didn't want to do stand-up I mean after I did that Bob Hope joke I'm like I'm good I'm done I don't want to ever feel that pain ever again yeah and some people the risk of that pain

It's just not it's not worth it. It's not worth it to do that to your life Yeah, you maybe also like painting or maybe also like writing books or maybe you know Some people you don't have to do it You know like that's the thing about stand-up style like if you do it and you don't want to do it anymore Everybody's like boo You don't even want to do it anymore. You fucking sell out. People will say that about Aidy Murphy. Like, man, he's not real stand-up. He doesn't do stand-up anymore.

You hear the hardcore bros talking like that. I can see. It's hard because to be a stand-up, you really still, even though how rich you get, if you become a movie star, you're a millionaire, you still have to go in practice and go to the comedy comedy club so i can see where it's easy to quit if you get to a certain point where you're like you know what i don't i'm a grown adult i'm rich i have a wife and kids i don't want to go to this little shitty club and practice these new jokes you know yeah so i can see how it's easy to get out of comedy you know yeah you you just don't want the pain of it you don't want it's like exhausting

because like say if you started some pursuit in your life like if you started off and you were a painter you went to painting school and all that shit and you got through it and you became uh you know a respected artist and you're painting all the time, but you fucking hated painting. Like you were done with it. Like you were done with it. You wanted to go build sailboats. You wanted to, you have these other ideas in your head that you want to pursue. Like that happens to people, you know? So, so if they quit doing standup, you know, that's okay. Do you ever think, listen to me, I'm all Phil's homie. Do you ever think there's something that you haven't started yet? Like, you know, I'm going to learn how to play guitar this year. Is there anything in the back of your head that you've kind of fucked around with, like the idea of?

No, because I suck so hard at the new things that I'm doing already. That's not true. You started becoming an archer, and now you're fucking Robin Hood. Well, I'm not good at all. I'm constantly practicing at archery. But if you compare me to somebody who's really good, like I put a lot of hours in. I practice a lot.

I'll shoot like sometimes 100 hours in a day. Wow. Yeah. But it's because I'm kind of obsessed with it in some sort of a weird way. You know, it's fascinating to me. So that's one thing I'm already obsessed with that I suck at. And when, I mean, like, compare me to someone like Cameron Haynes or a professional archer that you, like, might see. Like, a friend of mine just sent me this photo.

My friend Johnny Rivett sent me this photo of this young girl. She's, like, 20 years old. And she's won, like, I think he said three world championships in a row. And she's an archer. Those people are really good with bows and arrows. There's a total next level. When it's like they're shooting at like 50 yards. And they're hitting the bullseye every time.

And on the X itself at 50 yards they're just dead calm and just dead on the inside and then when they release that string nothing moves and that arrow goes sailing right into that axe and they can do it repeatedly they can do it like 10 times in a row sometimes i mean these people were freaks it's really interesting to watch we we used to do archery in elementary school That was a part of our physical education, and I'm sure you can't do that anymore like I probably yeah I bet not is it illegal to walk around Robin Hood style with arch you like you know like a bow and arrow like is it like can I walk into like an off guard and not get kicked out if

I have a no they wouldn't let you in really it? It's a weapon. It is a weapon. Yeah, it's a weapon. It's a slingshot, too. I had some friends who brought their bows to Vegas, and the hotel wouldn't let them take them up to their room. Wow, really? Yeah, they had to check them. Yeah, they had to check them with the hotel. It doesn't seem right.

No, it seemed... Well, yeah, though, it does. Like what? Some fucking asshole's gonna be on your elevator with a bow and arrow yeah but you have a shooting people in the area but you can't like trust these people you don't know them these people they come in they're not even americans they got a bow and arrow they're crazy i mean what no you can't have this in your room give us give me that thing you know like you come to the saloon, put your fucking gun in the bucket, sir.

You know? You come to our hotel, give me your fucking bow and arrow. No, you can't practice in your room and accidentally shoot the fucking television. I don't know you. What if you get whiskied up and you're working on your fucking draw length in your hotel room and you send your arrow flying through the middle of the electrical box and cause a fucking 13-story fire that kills 1,000 people. Yeah, but what if you use the steak knife from your steak

and you just start stabbing everybody? I would think that a steak knife would be way more dangerous than a bow. You've got to stop putting ideas in people's heads. It's like airplanes. I always freak out where you can't have a razor blade on the airplane, but yet you can have a MacBook Pro that you can smack over the head of somebody and probably kill them. It's hard to grip those for like real impact,

but a skateboard, you could fuck somebody up with a skateboard. You know, you can, I don't think they were going to change it, but I don't think they did. They were going to make it so that it's legal to bring pool cues on, but, uh, I think they made it so that it's legal to bring pool cues on but uh i think they

made it so that it's not anymore because like they thought that you beat people up at the pool queue but a skateboard's probably a better weapon than a pool queue maybe more distance certainly more distance to you and the person you're trying to hit with a skateboard yeah which makes it more effective in a lot of places because you could hit somebody and they can't hit you yet. Pool cue is going to break pretty quick, right, though? Yeah. One good hit. Maybe.

That skateboard's got trucks, metal. Depends on what it's made out of, but most pool cues have multiple pieces, and that's part of the problem. It's not one gigantic piece of wood because for the most the most part like if you see like a beautiful pool cue what a lot of players like they like the cue to be 19 ounces so um they they work on making there's a few people that like 20 20s rare like sometimes you'll find the outliers that like something heavy but they're pretty specifically between 18 and 20 ounces. Now for a normal person, that would seem like, well, what's the difference? Well, to the pool players, like it's the professionals and it's a touch that they develop where they know the exact weight of

their cue. And so the exact impact it's going to have. So they have to balance it out. And a lot of times the way they balance it out is by using different kinds of wood. So they use one kind of wood for what you see, but another kind of wood for under the wrap. And it'll be a lighter, like a maple, similar to maybe shaft wood even. And then on the outsides of the front and the back, it might even just be cord, where they drill through the actual hard wood and they stuff a core in there of a softer wood. the actual hard wood and they stuff a core in there of a softer wood so the cue achieves like the desired look and maybe uniform feel but it has a lower mass a lower weight so you can get it down to like maybe even below 19 ounces or you know for reasonably uh well done cue but if you

hit somebody ahead with that it's gonna break for the most part probably right, but if you get one of those fucking house cues Like those full splice house cues and you grab the the hard end the dark end You can beat the fuck out of somebody with one of those That's a different animal because that's in one solid piece of wood, especially those old-school ones Those are like the Dufferin blanks you know it's like a like a rosewood on the bottom and a maple on the top and right from the splice where it's white that stuff's gonna break but the stuff above it you could beat the fuck out of somebody with the

stuff above it that hard shit you could you could hit them as hard as you want you probably wouldn't break it probably pretty hard yeah people are like i'll fucking do it bro okay maybe you can but maybe like a normal person would be it would be very hard to break that on somebody you could do it you could be some fucking you know incredible hulk type character and just smash it on the first attempt but i would imagine like it's a much harder and denser like weapon than like a standard, like very pretty pool cue or someone like a lot of pool cues are like artistic. It's really interesting because people outside the pool world, they would they would think like, what are you talking about? There's a there's a collector's like group of cue addicts, and they're addicted to pool cues? They collect cues?

But, dude, you'd be surprised. There's guys out there that have collections that are worth a million bucks and more in pool cues. Yeah, there's people that have coin collections of butterfly things. People that collect butterflies. That's the creepiest shit everywhere. Yeah, you've got a dead bug. With pins all over it. I've got a shit everywhere. You've got a dead bug. With pins all over it. I've got a new one.

I've got a new one. There was Terrence McKenna in an old lecture was talking about catching bugs. And that there's something, like because we used to eat bugs a lot when we were primates, that there's almost like this genetic excitement thing that comes when you catch a bug that's similar to what happens when you catch a fish. You know that thing that happens when you catch a fish? You've fished before, right? Have you ever fished and then ate it?

Once, yes. Just once? Yeah. I haven't been fishing since dad, like, 14, 15. He would always take me fishing. That's, wow. Yeah, I haven't been fishing since dad, like 14, 15. He would always take me fishing. That's, wow. Yeah. I haven't fished since then.

Fishing's fun, man. It's awesome. It's a great way to catch a meal too, right? But there's some weird fucking primal thing that happens when you pull it out of the water. You feel like, Smeagol-like or something, you know? It's like, oh, me gets this. We pulls this out of its... Oh, out of its water.

It's flopping around the deck. Me has this here. There's something weird about it. There's something weird about a fish. You're catching something in some alien world and yanking it out of there. It lives in the water. There's a living thing in the water

and you can see him down there you fucking cast to him and you throw a piece of meat that's covered by a hook and he bites the meat and you will fucking yank that hook through the top of his mouth a giant steel barb digs into his face and then he's still fighting like hard like pulling left and right and left the rod is pulling the the reel is fucking the the the what is that thing called the clicky thing on the wheel the drag the drag and the reel is it's peeling because this fucking fish is pulling out line. And you finally get him in there. And you suck him out of his dimension.

And he's flopping around in your boat. That is a crazy experience. It's a crazy. You just pulled some alien creature. So he lives in the water. 500 years from now, let's say. 500 years. They're definitely going to figure out how to take animals and make them be able to communicate to us.

They're going to make that crossover. 500 years? Fuck yeah. Maybe not even 500 years, right? Yeah, right. When that happens, we're not going to go fishing anymore because we're going to be like talking to fucking fish. We're all going to die. We're all going to be vegans.

We're going to be forced to be vegans because of technology. Well, if we do know for sure what an animal's feeling when it dies it would definitely be way hard to eat meat way harder like that's um that's the argument of like the the vegan movement that makes the most sense because if we really knew but here's the thing a lot of these motherfuckers didn't even care about each other like those deer that i eat they kill each other all the time they fucking stab each other with the horns that grow out of their heads bears bears are like cannibals they're all cannibals people get angry like if you eat black bear like first of all black bear is delicious and bears

are fucking monsters they're cannibals it doesn't mean we don't want to kill them or don't want to let them live or want to extinguish all of them. No, no, they're cool. It's cool having these animals. But they don't give a fuck about you. Gotta recognize that they do not give a fuck about you. Until they start talking to us and then we find out they're just very hard to get to know, but they really love us. Yogi. You just gotta take your time. And then we found out they're just very hard to get to know but they Could you imagine if you found out what they were thinking

Could you imagine if you could read minds and you just looked out into a pack of wolves? That was chasing elk up to the top of a mountain Do you know how terrified you would be if you could read the mind of a wolf you'd be like oh my god We've got to kill them all oh my god we've got to kill them all oh my god we got to kill them all do they all they want to do is kill that's all they want to do is kill if we could read them but we don't read their minds we look at them like oh listen to them how they're just just jacked that they got to kill again today you know they have a problem with these elk that they find where wolves get into these elk populations and they decimate the herds. They don't even eat everything they kill. It's crazy. They'll kill like many elk and just leave half the body behind or more. They don't just sit and

eat it until they're done. They kill again. They kill again, just like dogs do. You know, you ever, you ever heard of it? Like my dog got at my chickens once. My dog has killed two of my chickens. It's a, it's a fucking real drag, but it's instinct. You know, he's not a bad dog. It's just, nobody told him he can't talk. He doesn't know in his mind, chickens are death. You got to kill that fucking thing there it is go get it it's like it's programmed in him it's how he's a dog it's like you literally cannot take it out of them I mean you could grow them up with from the time they're puppies with chickens just like I did with my cat so the dogs don't think of the cats as the enemy but if they don't grow up with them they

don't just accept chickens into the fucking yard when the dog's seven years old He's like what the fuck it is. Oh the chickens live with us. There are friends. Oh, yeah, your friends. Yeah, your friends your friends Okay. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, just leave me alone with your friends. I want to talk to him just jack him He was just jacking. It's not his fault. It's his dog Instincts me never knew that you're not supposed to eat chickens before he's a grown dog Wolves are very similar in that way. They want to kill things and they're beautiful and they're amazing I'm not saying we shouldn't have wolves But people have this idea that we shouldn't keep an eye on those fucking things

I'm tired of talking to people about this like yeah wolves are awesome like there was a um in canada they're using helicopters to shoot wolves because the caribou population is getting decimated so they just go on a jack and spree the wolves just take over. They just run rampant. When they get to a sufficient population where they can just dominate herds and surround them, they're raising them like cattle. They're monsters, man. They jack gigantic numbers of them if they want to. They're not conservationists.

Have you heard about the people taking dogs into New York City at night to take and hunt out rats? Whoa. good luck with that like little dogs too like little like fun loving like even like shih tzus i think and they just fucking just just you made me picture it because i remember hearing uh i think mike rowe the guy from dirty jobs talking on uh the opium jimmy show one day about it like he went out i think he went out with these people for a few nights in a row and made a little documentary online i'm trying to find it right now. But they said it was crazy. They go after their backs and just break their backs and toss them around and just throw them and go after another one. Oh, my God.

It's just like hundreds will come out of a rat pile or like in a dumpster and shit like that. And the dog's just jacking them. Yeah, yeah. Oh, my God. That's so crazy. But they just do that. That's their instinct. As an adult, I haven't looked at a chicken chicken's butt

but like is it like an asshole and vagina like every other animal it's a no it it is a uh i forget the word egg hole succulent what is the word there's a word of the opening i forget uh forget uh what the word for the for the opening rather i forget what it is but uh it's a it's a hole that everything comes out of piss shit Babies everything that seems like an upgrade, but what's the name of that? Do you know what the name of that hole is? I just find out what a chickens hole. I just remember that That old porn video We're looking at is the chicken wearing sweatpants, and it's fucking adorable.

It's so funny. It's really funny. It's adorable. I just remember that old video of that dude fucking that chicken. Oh, my God. And I just wondered, you know, if that's legit. People definitely fuck chickens. Apparently.

It just seems soft. Well, if you think about it, it's made out of feathers. Is it called a vent? A vent. That's the word I was trying to The technical word But vent sounds like I can remember that But yeah everything comes out of one hole That's interesting It has to be pretty dirty in there

Is this the Oh my god these dogs are just letting it loose on rats. Oh, God. Oh, this is so crazy. Oh, my gosh. Oh, my God. This is so crazy. This doesn't show a ton of it.

I guess this is just a little portion of it. Oh, my God. There's more of it online if you want to look it up. Powerful, Mike Rowe. That's pretty funny. Mike Rowe has some cool-ass subjects. His show is fascinating. That's the Dirty Jobs Rowe has some cool-ass subjects. His show is fascinating. That's the Dirty Jobs guy, right?

Yeah. He did another one, too, right? Did Dirty Jobs and another one. This is fucking nuts! These dogs jacking rats. Oh, this is so fucked up. Wow. That's fucked up.

He says down here it's unlike anything he's ever seen, which, after doing all of Dirty Jobs, that's pretty fucked up that's what he says down here it's unlike anything he's ever seen which after doing all the dirty jobs that's that's pretty fucked up i've talked about this i believe before once um at least but there was one time where i was in new york and uh yet i had to uh use a pay phone i didn't have a cell phone at the time and it was uh early 90s i guess real early 90s, I guess, real early 90s. And I parked my car at this gas station. I was pumping the gas. I set the pump on it. And then I went over to the payphone.

And in the time it took me to walk from that car to the payphone, put the coins in and turn around, there was three rats on my car. They were running over the top of my wheel wells. They were running over the top where my wheel wells they were running over the top where the wheel is and then down under and then another one would come up and jump up and go down under and I was like what the fuck like they were everywhere man there was so many of him is so creepy because I was watching it going through you can't you can't stop these things how many of them there are

yeah and I was just thinking like what is it like to sleep in these buildings it going there you can't you can't stop these things look how many of them there are wow and i was just thinking like what is it like to sleep in these buildings and hear those things running through your walls oh yeah this is fuck dude what are these but but but these rats can have like rabies well one one of them made it one of them made it into the sewer huh wow fuck yeah oh god killer rap awful uh i was doing they give the dog a rabies shot. Simple. Duh. I did this podcast with Tiffany the other day in my backyard, and a rat ran right over her foot. I think it might have ran in my house, though.

And so now I've been freaked out thinking there's a rat in my house. My cat, Fluffette, we were eating, and a cat walks over to the fucking table with a dried out rat. Like an old, dead rat. Oh, gross. Dude, like, I had some work done on my basement, and I'm just thinking maybe there was, like, something trapped in the wall. That, like, as they were cutting into the wall she got the old dead rat i don't have no idea where the fuck it came from but it was in my house and it was like a mummy man oh maybe it was under like a couch or something or maybe it doesn't make sense we've tried to figure it out

we try to figure that's fucking i hate this but cats will find shit you know i you know cats will find shit man don't they bring it to you like a present? Yeah, it's weird, dude. It's so weird. It's weird. It's so weird. They do that. It's so weird.

They're like little fucking massage demanders. That's what they are. They're little tiny massage demanders. I make the mistake sometimes of trying to write on the couch with a laptop to try to write shit. And this motherfucker just is relentless he'll come up and just bang headbutt my hand step on the keys he doesn't give a fuck and you push him off he's like yeah yeah i know you pushed me off but now i'm back and i want the exact same thing i wanted a couple of seconds ago but uh i'm just gonna try to do a little slower

maybe like he doesn't give a fuck he just wants wants massages. Period. Give it to me. I would have to spray him with water to get him off me. They hate that. They hate even just the sound. But I don't want to do that. I don't want to do that. I just want him to chill out. I want you to just relax.

Just hang out with me, man. I don't have to demand attention, you fucker. You know? Did you see that? There's, I guess, a new either movie or series oj simpson versus the people yeah you know i was talking about this with uh someone and uh it was a good point um that the people that are growing up today like the 20 year olds they don't even know that story like for us it was a part of our

life growing up because we're like holy shit he got off he got off oh my god everybody was pretty much convinced he was guilty except those people that needed to be convinced and the lead up to it some of the most popular movies the naked gun series we all kind of fell in love with this like guy you know it was kind of like, what? Not that guy. And out of nowhere that took two years of everyone's life following this guy's story. And still, it's still fascinating

to this day when you see him on TV when there's some sort of a prison thing going on. And you see they have photos of him and they're moving him around or something like that. It's like, whoa. This is strange to see man i wonder if there's any way to do any new evidence using today's dna technology to find out if he you know like this this making the murder you know you haven't watched it yet no

just making this murder thing's interesting because of like you know like the technology that they're using like and stuff like john benet ramsey like it seems like they should be able to find who killed her now using today's technology yeah I don't know how much evidence they still have that they have saved I don't know how that works yeah do you know how that works and I'm sure they have evidence I mean I would imagine yeah right they can go back in there and fun you know use this it I don't know man I think the real problem with that John Bonet thing is that they had fucked up the evidence. One of the parts of the murder case that was fucked up is there was like fresh snow.

And these people would have been able to they would have been able to find footprints in the fresh snow. And these cops tread all over everything. And that that was a big mistake. And that the way they investigated it, apparently there were a big mistake and that the way they investigated it apparently there are a bunch of criticisms about the way they handle it they just had never handled a case like that before it was the Boulder Police Department boulders a small town and the you know how a lot of fucking crazy people murdering their kids or you know allegedly they don't even know who

did it right they never figured out who did it. Yeah, I still think it's the family. Well, everybody thinks it's the family, but that's a fucking crazy indictment if you're wrong. I told you about that crazy conspiracy theory the other day that they think there's, the online world thinks there's some crazy serial killer that's tied to this. Oh, my God.

They've linked him to that JonBenet Ramsey thing, too, the same serial killer. He's done these crazy stories that have no explanation for who did what and someone else has got blamed for it it's a it's a crazy story too but who knows if there's uh anything anything in there well well i don't know man but it's the point being like if they wanted to try to figure out who the murderer was today You would have a real problem. I think with the evidence being contaminated. I mean how much evidence they have What about their how long does a body last before you can exhume it and examine it? You know, how much what can you get from that? Who the fuck knows I don't have those answers remember those HBO shows though

The the real autopsy series. I can't watch dude that guy That guy used to freak me out. Yeah, Michael, baby You know that guy the autopsy yeah, yeah, I couldn't watch those shows, but whoo I'm not into that like like there's a I do I don't know if I talked about this But there's like this bridge in Pasadena called suicide bridge And it was made in like I believe the 30s and like people die all the time off this bridge they just go there and kill themselves I know somebody that was hiking and he was just hiking and there's just a girl dead on the on the on the trail because

there's like a trail that goes on the bottom of it and then somebody told me I don't know if this is true but somebody told me that like when they huge rainstorms, that all these bones just kind of wash down from this big... Okay, that sounds like some Scooby-Doo shit. What? But yeah. What did they say? The bones wash down? The mountain and then in the trail that you'll just see little bone here and there from bodies that jumped and were never found in this side of this side of this Wow if there's that many people have done it I mean, it's totally it's not like they're gonna do a thorough job of cleaning you if you jump off a bridge and splatter

All of the rocks. Yeah, I think how much can they clean up? I think it's over a hundred people though Jumped off the last girl the girl that that my friend took he sent me a photo of her body just laying there but he's I guess that girl lived in Woodland Hills and she was like 38 and she just, that's it.

I'm just going to go to this suicide bridge and do it. Oh my God. That's awful. Yeah. Fuck, man. Falling does not seem like the proper way for suicide.

It's fucking real though. I bet the rush when you realize you've pulled that trigger and done that. I saw that video you posted that Andy Stumpf just was teasing you guys to go jump with him. It looked like he landed on the ground at the end of it, but I think he was triggering his parachute. Yeah, no, he triggered his parachute. Oh, he's terrifying.

I don't know why it's called, but there's this thing in Mexico where it's a restaurant that's up in the air where you're sitting, glass bottom, in the middle of the air just eating. A hot air balloon? No, it's like a, I don't know if you can find it, but it's like you sit down on these chairs and the whole thing is just kind of like way up in the air. I don't know. There it is. What? And you eat like super high up.

Oh my fuck. It's called Dinner in the Sky. It's 150 feet in the air. Why would you ever want to do that? Dude, seriously, fuck that. What if you have to go to the bathroom? Yeah, man. What if you do?

What if you're eating with Mike Goldberg? Yeah, but you have to like put seatbelts on. Sorry, we're going to have to lower this. Like you eat with this seatbelt. Yeah, how do you want? Oh, fuck. Get the fuck out of here. Oh my God, It's on a crane

Ladies and gentlemen And it's in Mexico So you don't even know You're strapped in And they're Giving you food While this whole thing Fucking sways

Back and forth In the breeze They're taking selfies Oh my god You people are Freaking me out I'm nowhere near that thing And I'm freaking out

Yeah My toes are crunched up. My fingers are crunched up. Heights, man. I can't do it. Oh, my God. This shit used to do on Fear Factor, man. I don't even understand how those people can do it.

I'm so glad that nobody ever got hurt doing that. You could do a show up there if you want. Oh, Marriage in the Sky? Yeah, we could do a comedy show. Wow. Let's just promote other people doing it, Marriage in the Sky. Do a show up there? Yeah, we could do a comedy show. Wow. Let's just promote other people doing it. Coco in the Sky.

I'll promote a Joey Diaz performance up there. Hey, cocksuckers, welcome to Mexico, bitch. From the clouds. Dude, last time I did his podcast, him and Lee just dropped acid. And then he gave us these stars

and I wasn't going to eat one but i ate one george i was with george perez george couldn't feel his whole entire face the whole thing and then near the end maybe he's like that song yeah i can't feel my face when i'm with you uh i look over at lee though and his eyes are rolled back in his head whoa Whoa. And like, that guy, man. Like, Joey, really? He's an animal. He's not here to play games. Yeah.

Who drops acid, though, at like nine at night on a Sunday? Like a soldier. Like a fucking soldier. He's an original. You got to let him be him. He knows what he's doing. Oh, yeah, I know he does. Poor Lee, though, spent the night at the studio, though i'm just like man if you eat acid that's like a 10 to 11 hour trip usually so joey after the podcast was probably like all right take care and this poor

lee's just sitting there tripping on acid in this random office building somewhere oh how long does acid typically last it used to last i would say about 11 hours too you're like all right i think i could go to bed now oh my god yeah it's not cool it's like uh it's like mush like mushrooms times five it used to be i don't know if it's the same my friend just did a peyote ceremony oh holla and native american yeah would you ever do that would you ever do the peyote? Here's the problem with ceremonies. You're doing them with a bunch of people you don't even know.

And there was kids around. You don't know who's going to freak out. You know, when you want to do your peyote, man, you should probably be alone. Yeah. Or be with someone you trust. I think, you know, if you get lucky and catch a good good group you might have the time of your life at a peyote ceremony or you could uh you could just be hanging out with people who are completely out of their fucking mind and also do drugs that's possible too like you don't have any control

you're just guessing whether or not this is going to make sense no thank you yeah I think peyote is that's the one where you puke all the time and then the last days or something peyote is a tricky one man it's some sort of a um like it's from a cactus right and there's another drug that's just like peyote that's also from a cactus that uh that i think you can also get similar effects from i can't remember the name of the cactus but i guess in mexico it's you can find them all over the place and really there's a movie about about it too I forget the name of the movie but there's a movie about this guy that's just trying to get this cactus and trip on what is the active ingredient peyote

right isn't there a masculine mask yeah when I was in high school was mask you know the kid dropped two hits a mask and they'd say you know the kid dropped two hits of mesk and they'd say mush mush the kid dropped two hits of mesk he was fucked like i remember like dropping mescaline like people would talk about dropping mesk and i'd be like you gotta be out of your fucking mind there's no way you people are animals yeah there's a few drugs like in the early 80s 70s that it seems like people used to always talk about that like That don't exist in masculine. Yeah, like masculine and there was something that Joey Diaz showed me a bottle of recently that I was like, what the fuck I didn't know that existed

Quaaludes, yeah, that's the bill Cosby drug. Is that yes, okay look. Yeah. Well allegedly Mm-hmm. That's what he allegedly was in trouble for, was procuring or giving these girls this stuff, allegedly. You know, they're saying now that there's been some problems with the trial. It's like the first day there was some article that was written today that I read. They were saying that one of the key witnesses doesn't think that it's legal to prosecute based on the deal that Cosby got back then. I think that's – Oh, yeah. He made a deal. Yeah.

I heard that it was – that Bill Cosby was about to buy NBC and it was – I heard that, too. And the Illuminati. Yeah, man. the Illuminati. Yeah, man. The Illuminati. They're all trying to take him down, man. What?

I've heard that too. Yeah. Where did I read that? I don't know. So this guy was essentially saying that he's not on Bill Cosby's side, but the actual law, the way the law is written, he gave him some sort of a deal in the reason why he was willing to give out the statement that he made. You know, what's that called? Declaration or whatever the fuck it is when they when you're anyway in court, he he deposition. So he was willing to do the deposition based on the fact that he couldn't get prosecuted, prosecuted for it. So now that they want to prosecute him for the same case, this guy thinks that that is not legal. How old is he? Double jeopardy kind of thing?

I don't know. I don't know. We're talking about the same cases this is because there's so many cases yeah it's another smoke and fire that's a that's a terrifying one though that this guy was doing that to people we all know people like that though just unfortunately yes guys yeah but that's such a deep level but that's such a deep level, man. That's such a scary level. Scary level of creepitude. This is the scariest. I mean, you're watching, you're looking at people lying unconscious. You know? And then you're fucking them.

Is it lying unconscious or just not remembering now? Is it just blacking out? Who knows, man? I don't know. I think a lot of them are saying it's blacking out. You know, man, the trauma of that, can you imagine if you just thought that guy was really cool and you wanted to hang out with him and you woke up with one shoe on and your panties are down by your ankles and you realize what happened.

You'd be like, what? And you don't even know what to say. You don't even know what to say. You're like, what happened? What? And especially if you're what to say you're like what happened what and especially if you're drinking together you're having fun having a couple of cocktails you don't think anything's going wrong i this diet now i have one drink i'm wasted and uh the other day luckily i didn't drive the other day i had like two or three drinks and black super bravo

blackout like like i had no idea how i got home i did had no idea like anything that happened but that shit's scary because i existed as a human for at least three or four hours i even like i checked my phone i was texting people well they say honestly when you drink a lot that's it starts happening like later in your life that like people that are they're getting drunk like five six nights a week and I'm not saying you necessarily were but their their tolerance starts to like drop off their body's ability to fight it off starts to like drop off and the propensity towards blackouts it's when the way it's been explained to me by someone who had a problem with it that it gets to this point where it's just

like super common to blackout where it didn't used to be so it just wears on you over time it's definitely where I've been like oh I don't remember I talked to you last night like like that stuff but it's just like you remember pieces this is a this is the first time I that I can remember that it was so such a straight blackout like I was freaked out like I I just sat there and I was just trying to remember anything that happened like the last four four hours or whatever cut to why is my bathroom covered with blood yeah man blackouts are terrifying because people

they black out and they get behind a wheel it is so insane that we have a culture that sells alcohol everywhere you can buy guns everywhere you can do all this crazy shit but you still can't openly buy weed

like as if that's going to be the tipping point is that if we just this whole country just says all right let's all just relax and all right we're going to let it through like as if that that would somehow another make this whole thing fall apart. I'm sorry, go ahead. No, no. I just, you know, the whole marijuana thing recently, I keep on forgetting that it's illegal. The other day I was just like, wow, this is actually illegal what I'm doing right now. You just kind of forget that marijuana is still illegal.

Well, Brian, you have a prescription. Right. But the number one thing that cops are being trained for and in court cases is marijuana DUIs now. Like, really? Yeah. Like my friend's a lawyer and he goes, dude, it's surpassing drunk driving now. As far as as the money? Just how many people they catch for marijuana DUIs.

And it's the same DUI. Driving under the influence is the same as alcohol. How do they prove it? They have tests now that they can immediately just test you. And they're not the most accurate. So that's the only thing that that you have going for you but if they if they pull you over and there's smoke coming out of your window or they see a joint on you you know that's just got burned they can they can they can test you now and go oh yeah you have

marijuana in your system you got a dui no matter if you have a license no matter if you have anything and it's totally like one of those things he's telling me i'm like jesus christ you know like i you don't think about that it is still illegal and yeah well even if it wasn't illegal okay let's just say it's legal right i think we can all point to like at least one or two people that we know that probably shouldn't drive high yeah yeah absolutely so they're impaired right but it's a fucking way different kind of impairment than the kind of impairment that you would get from alcohol like it's not like a muscular coordination type of impairment it's a different impairment it's like a judgment impairment, perhaps, or just freak out, anxiety, like that kind of impairment and inability to recognize when to merge, when not to merge. Oh, I'm fucking freaking out, man.

That could happen for sure. That can definitely happen. And that should be taken into consideration whenever you make it legal to do anything. We agree that it's all legal to drink caffeine and get in your car. We all agree that.'s all legal to drink caffeine and get in your car we all agree that it's speed you could have a monster energy drink sitting in your cup holder when a cop pulls you over that's meth man right it's an awesome meth it's delicious but it's obviously not meth but it's it's like probably like how much caffeine is in one of those monster energy drinks a A lot. Dude, those things, if you don't want to play games,

if you want to just get crazy, just chug one of those big ones, like the ones that look like the lemonade cans, those giant lemonade cans. Chug one of those fucking things, monster energy drink, those big giant tall boys. Those things are ridiculous. Not that much.

Really? This says 160 milligrams per 16 ounce can wow what about starbucks that's interesting yeah so what else is in there then uh well there's probably a lot of sugar for sure fuck yeah what about sugar-free they'll have sugar-free ones that's interesting i would have thought it was way more i was gonna add to what you're just saying though but there's a certain amount of people you know that shouldn't be driving anyway, even when they're stone sober. They just suck.

They can't handle all the input. We have a winner! Jamie Vernon with a winner! Yeah, I know a girl that I don't think she knows she's driving when she's driving. You know what I mean? I'm constantly like, you know the lights red. The lights red. If I wasn't here, you would have just ran that.

I was watching this lady text and drive yesterday. Completely in the wrong lane. I was like, look at this bitch. Completely in the oncoming lane. Just crossing over two double yellow lines, phone in her hand, texting, looking up, swerves back in. I was like, oh my God. She just crossed right over into this oncoming street. Have you ever had any kind of panic attack or panicky feeling from weed recently?

No. If I have any panic attacks I've had from weed have, the big ones have all been from edibles. Yeah. And the panic attacks have been more like just a super hard, introspective, objective view of life and death and the cycle of things. of things and the sun running out of fuel eventually this this planet no longer being viable for life that all those things are gonna happen millions and millions years in the future for you not so much time everybody not so much time if you you're born today well congratulations you only have a hundred years or if you're you're really really really really lucky so for all of us this whole thing is a quick flash where

we try to figure out what's going on it's it's a quick flash it's happening right in front of our faces and we're living it and while we're living it we're going what is going on here like what are we exactly doing what are we exactly doing we're working and sleeping and eating and fucking and going to the movies but but what are we doing? What is this race? What is this race of people doing? What is this weird thing that only has 100 years of life? It just starts to figure out how bizarre and weird this whole thing is before it's snuffed out.

And the new ones with their similarly short lifespan benefit from all the information passed on by the ones before them. But still go through life like it's a dream. Still do everything you do and think, is this real? What is this life? Like, what is the sky? What is this infinity above my head that no one talks about? Every day, infinity is above your head. What do you do?

You pull the visor down, put your fucking shades on. God, it's fucking so bright out. You're looking at the reflection of the sun off gases in the atmosphere above your head that you need to sustain life. And we're just so used to it, we don't even think of it as interesting. It takes a hundred years to stop you. You could do your best, but you hit a hundred years. It's over.

It's not enough time. So you just start to recognize the hustle as you get older. Well, I think, you know, if you had kids today, I think they're a little bit luckier because I feel like we're on the cuff of being able to download us, you know, very soon. And I don't think we might miss it just by like a couple years. I think we will become incredibly annoying spammers of ourselves. That's what we're going to do. We're going to be able to download ourselves. Then we're just going to fucking shoot ourselves into BitTorrent

and Mega Upload. We're going to put ourselves everywhere. Like, I want to go everywhere. I want to go to fucking Europe. I want to be in Turkey. And there'll be doubles and triples of people all throughout the, this artificial world that we've created of hyperspace. We're going to have like a hyperspace cloud drive

of humanity that's going to be just as fucking crowded as Earth. And we're going to go, shit, we don't have enough hard drive space in the fucking cloud, and these assholes keep copying themselves because they want to be immortal. So rich guys would have a cloud server of 200 trillion

terabytes, and it would just be filled with copies of themselves, and then they would just send out fucking fake emails. Click here to see some dick. Whoa, I want to see some dick. And you click there, boom, be filled with copies of themselves and then they would just send out fucking like fake emails click here to see some dick whoa i want to see some dick and you click there boom he it's an exploit he gets into your server bang makes copies of himself everywhere yeah you'll be able to like get joe rogan in your cars your car has your brain and all your your past and all your memories but your car's talking to you and it's you it. It's like, where am I, bro? Dude.

Dude, imagine if they figure out a way to not just download your consciousness, but take parts out you don't need. Yeah. Like, take parts out that you don't need, like your ego. Take the ego out and have this consciousness be completely compliant. We figured out a way to isolate the ego. We're going to remove it. And we're going to put this brain in cars.

So you get in your car and you're talking to you. But you don't have your own ego. Hey, man, I want to have a say where we drive. You can't have that shit coming out of your car. Your car has to be completely compliant. Right? That's how I drive. I don't take advice from my fucking car.

I'm driving, bitch. Relax. If you could download your consciousness, your own consciousness in your car, your car would be literally an extension of you. And the car thinks it's you. Yeah. The car totally thinks it's you.

I can't see. Well, the car knows that you and it are one. And then when you're together, you're the same. But his place in life is to be your car. It's so fucked up. And you could start downloading you in everything. So you could download you in the toilet, microwave. You just have little Joe Rogan who thinks it's a real person.

Yeah. You'd get invaded. Someone would ring your doorbell. Ding, dong. You open the door. A million Bill Burrs come piling into your house. You open the door, a million Bill Burrs come piling into your house because someone decided to just copy Bill Burr and put all the Bill Burr files out into the internet. You have to kill them all because you don't want a bunch of Bill Burrs talking all day.

So you have to be like, I'm sorry, Bill Burr toaster. I'm going to kill you now. They would be like wolves. They're really cool, but you have to control the numbers. That many of any of us. Imagine if there was a hundred million Jamie Vernors. You would go, listen, dude. Enough.

It's too many of you fuckers. People don't think about that shit, man. If it's possible to download consciousness, it's possible to copy it. If it's possible to copy it, it's possible to spam it. We're fucked. Joe Rogan dildos. Don't put that there. No get me out of here Well, do you remember when we were talking a long time ago about? Being able to recreate like a celebrity and some sort of an artificial life that will have sex with you

Mm-hmm that you could do that like you could make your own You know fill in the blank You could make your own Hillary swank. Maybe got a Hillary swank fetish You could literally have a robot sex doll that is her right? Like it is her like if you become like some super billionaire Donald Trump type character, and you got long paper I'm saying I'm saying I'm saying that guy could he has the cash or one of those things when they when they first start get designed He could do that. He could do whatever he wants He can make like this we're gonna get there within the next I'd say a hundred years

Where they're gonna have these artificial people that you can have sex with that are you're not gonna be able They're gonna be like Blade Runner things. You're starting to describe an episode of Black Mirror that you haven't seen Listen folks, I swear to God. I haven't seen yet. God damn it! Listen, folks. I swear to God, I haven't seen that show. I'm not stealing. It's so weird. Yeah, I have to see it. I only saw the pig fucker one.

It was good. I liked it. The one you're talking about is really cool. Really? Yeah, it's a really interesting idea. And the way they show you how it works is cool. Wow. I need to see it.

They're starting it up again, too. How many episodes? There's six, and then there's a special Christmas one they made a little after, and now they're going to start some more. What's the name of the one I need to see? The name of it, I'm not sure. Like I said, there's only six of them, so it's not that hard to find it. Damn it, I have the picture over here, but it doesn't say the name.

I think it's totally possible that we're going to be able to replicate what we are. It might not happen in our lifetime or even our children's lifetime, but it just seems to me that they just keep getting better and better at fixing things. Willie Nelson just had a stem cell operation to fix his lungs. Willie fucking Nelson, you know? just had a stem cell operation to fix his lungs. Willie fucking Nelson. You know?

Do you think, like, Obama recently said something about how he's putting a, you know, he's putting an end to cancer. An end to cancer. Like, he's like, like, we are going to solve this shit. Like, he, like, it was kind of weird because it's like, oh, yeah, no one's talked about cancer recently. Why is that not cured?

Because they don't want to let us know that the zitka virus is coming yeah sounds like an old school high school football coach who's ready to fuck up the world the zitka virus is here the second though you can cure cancer by taking a shot or whatever eating a pill do you think cigarette smoking will come back oh yeah and i think everybody that's been pitching about it is all everyone's just going to start smoking yeah if they figure out a way well listen it's super possible they're going to be able to figure out a way to make tissue healthier than it is now right it's for how long what what at what price do you pay you're always going to pay a price if you use something abrasive on your lungs, like cigarette smoke, like even joints, I've got to imagine that if you're like one of those hardened leather lunged hash heads that's just constantly...

Dabbing it. I just got to think that there's got to be at least some irritation of your lungs from the hot smoke. Just some. Vaporizers, none. Vaporizer doesn't do any of that. But I would think that just smoke in general is not the best idea for you to take in. Right. But so cigarette smoke is real bad because there's all these chemicals.

So they might be able to figure out something that can regenerate healthy tissue and get rid of the bad tissue. Maybe they could give you some sort of a flush, you know, where they would fill your lungs up with something and it would just eradicate all the bad tissue. Maybe they could give you some sort of a flush where they would fill your lungs up with something and it would just eradicate all the bad tissue. Who the fuck knows? They'll figure it out though, dude. Whatever it is. They'll fix everything. It's going to be so many people. It's going to be such a problem.

Because they're going to be able to fix everything. Within like another how many? Let me make a guess again. Fucking totally unqualified guesses that's why airplanes still have ashtrays because they're like waiting for it to come back um I think airplanes still have ashtrays just for nostalgia's sake

you think they don't have the new ones don't well some new ones do and they even put them in the bathroom they put them in the bathroom because if they're going to smoke they want you to be able to put it out what they don't want you there be able to put it out. What? They don't want you to. There's no country you can still do it. It's not like it's just an American thing, right?

I don't know. That's a good question. Is that true? I bet in Vietnam or some shit. Get on a plane with one of those fat stogies. All flights in Philly or something. Do you remember cigarettes on planes? No.

No? I didn't fly until I was a freshman in high school. My first time was flying to Chicago. And it was when AOL first came out. It was the first girl I've ever met on the computer. And I met her in Chicago and I took all these photos of her. And I found the camera the other day. I never got developed all these photos that are on it. I should do that but um That was the first time I ever fly flown and that was already past the cigarette thing. He used to be really strange

These to be the section sometimes that's the only place you get a seat on the plane was in that section So you'd have to be in the smoking section It was like a joke like a hack joke like a reused premise over and over again. The smoking section on a plane. Like, Dice Clay had the best take on it. You're in a fucking tube. He's like, you're in a tube. The fucking smoke's going everywhere.

Oh! It's true. It's the preposterous idea that you could smoke in one area and it wouldn't affect the rest of the plane. I just Googled it. Apparently there's still a rule in the Federal Code of Regulations that they have to have an ashtray. And I think it's only because in 1973 a flight crashed and killed 123 people. And the attributed reason was because a cigarette was improperly disposed of. Right.

So if someone still has to light one up because they break the rule, they still have to have somewhere to put it out. Wow, what a crazy concession to the most bizarre fucking habit we accept. It's so common. It's one of the most common bad health habits. It's such a strange one, man. It's so persistent. So many people are willing to

sell their health short and the the wide range of their life all the bad years just get them rid of them enjoy your life people say that's that's what they always say right that's the excuse i mean i have a bit about it but there's like some kind of science where they say like every time every pack of cigarettes takes off like 30 minutes off your life Or something like that They've figured out what the average is and then so then if you figure out how many years you smoke then you're like yeah I don't want to live to be a hundred so I'll live to be 77. That's fine That's there's a bunch of those bits out there. Yeah, that are exactly the same as that bit, right?

Well my bit my bit was yeah it takes 30 minutes off your life fuck that I'll just wake up an hour early every day and have two packs you know the other premise though it's like that's a beaten premise the premise of it but what what am I gonna miss drooling and shit myself I'm pumped That was one of those things. It's the last 20. Like, there was a bunch of people that did that. Yeah, there's a few bits that I have retired,

and it's just amazing how, you know, with all this Amy Schumer stuff and all that. I saw a girl. I met a girl the other day. I didn't even know she was a comic. And she told me her website. And so later, after I hung out with her, I went home, went to her website. And she's just a new comic.

Opened up her front page. On the front page, she had a video. Press play. It was almost word for word, one of my bits. And I was just like, wow, that's how easy it is. She's never seen me. I've never seen her. You know, we've never met.

I've only done that bit a few times but how she said it was almost exactly how I wrote it there's definitely going to be cases that there's no way around it and it's totally normal you know Kurt Metzger had a real good point about it and he's one of the guys who's involved in this whole thing he's the head writer of Amy's show. And he said that there's oftentimes, and it's, it's, it's a fact that people write the exact same premise and they have no idea. They write it completely independently. They know they wrote it independently and then they'll see it on something and it'd already been done. Like, Oh no, it happens all the time because if you can see funny in something, other people could see funny in something. It's's not we're not talking about some insane bizarre esoteric um mr show with bob and

dave sketch like they had some really bizarre like if you stole one of those sketches like dude it's pretty obvious that this they have like really bizarre original subjects it's a very strange show and the way it's seamless it goes from one scene to the next and and one each show is like an entire piece it's all connected it's if you're seeing the new show the Netflix one it's amazing it's great it's really really good but if you're just dealing with like standard subjects like sex and relationships and marriage and diseases and work and drinking and you know whatever the fuck a sketch is on. Just normal stuff, normal life stuff.

Other people talk about that too, especially with sketches. Do you know how many fucking sketches have been put out? We were thinking about this because of this whole thing. Think about all the years of Saturday Night Live. Saturday Night Live has been on for how many years? What is it, like 30? 30. 30 years.

Okay. So 30 years of 52 weeks a year many years? What is it, like 30? 30 years. Okay. So 30 years of 52 weeks a year. How many weeks are they up, though? Are they up every week? No, not every week. They do seasons. Seasons? Okay. So just whatever the number is. 33 or something like that? Probably more. Probably more.

Think of all those years of sketches, and each one of them is, how long is it? An hour and a half? Saturday Night Live is long, right? Hour and a half. Hour and a half. How many fucking sketches is that over all those years? It's hundreds and hundreds of premises.

And then you have Mad TV, which went on forever. People forgot Mad TV went on forever. And they had some great fucking premises. Think about how many premises they burned or used. They burned off, meaning you can't use them anymore because the sketch has already been done like there's so many of them and you can come up with the same ideas completely independently and you think that you're you're a fucking trailblazer you're like oh man i don't think that's the case in the amy schumer stuff though you don't know because there are multiple sketches from the same sketch you know i mean like there's it's like the slap thing the other thing that what i think should should

find out if kurt's headed brighter he should find out who's the one that took that or wrote that sketch and you know what i mean and maybe maybe hold that person responsible you know and it is entirely possible um that people could come up with either one of those things independently. Entirely possible. Where it gets weird is that they're both back to back in the exact same order. That's where it gets weird. So is it possible for that to happen? Yeah, it's totally possible.

It's all, I think he put it best when he was criticizing his own show. He's like, if we're guilty of anything, we're guilty of being hacky. He goes, a lot of the stuff's kind of hacky. That's not true, though. Some of those sketches? No, I mean, yeah, it's true it's hacky, but that's not true of what happened in this case. Because these are multiple instances of the same, like as an example, the slap shep and the shaky thing. That's two things.

Well, the thing is that they're back to back that's what makes it weird yeah so because you've seen the flintstones thing right yes so the slap chef um the uh the kathleen madigan joke although i know kathleen she's hilarious and i'm sure she came up with it on her own she probably didn't know that that had been a part of the Flintstones. She probably forgot it or never saw it or who knows. The magician thing. Almost copied exactly. Yeah, almost exactly.

The girl. The same order. The black girl or the black person at the retail store or the Keenan Peel thing or whatever. It doesn't look good. Yeah. It wasn't Keenan Peel. They were on MADtv actually at the time.

Yeah. No, it doesn't look good. No. No, it doesn't look good. No, I mean, it doesn't look good, but what I think, you know, she's, I don't think she's guilty. I think it was writers, and I think she needs to, you know, kind of stand up and be like, look, it wasn't me, and this guy stole two bits, and this guy stole two bits. We're assuming they did. Allegedly. The problem is, like, first of all, for her, she's in the worst position, right?

Because it's her show. She's got her name on it. But if I was, I looked at this completely honestly. As little as I watched sketch comedy, I didn't know that any of those bits had been done before. I didn't know that the, all of them, pretty much all of them, I didn't know. So if somebody tried to sell those to me, I'd be like, oh, that's a good sketch. So I guess every time a sketch comes up, you've got to enter that premise into Google. Jim Norton and I were just talking about this weekend. Like, how do you, like, if you're writing like hundreds and hundreds of sketches, you know, if you're

doing like a Saturday Night Live or something like that, how do you find out whether or not this premise has been done before? You don't have to worry about it. What you have to do is do your own version of that premise. But in this case, the magician was an exact ripoff. It was like buying a fake iPhone from China. It wasn't a premise that they both played around in it was an exact ripoff you know it was almost filmed exactly well let's just let's say it was the exact same sketch in the exact same order whether it was a ripoff those it's hard to say whether

someone unless they come out and say hey I saw that guy do it and that's where I came up with the bit and I try to pretend I wrote it myself unless they come out and say, hey, I saw that guy do it, and that's where I came up with the bit, and I tried to pretend I wrote it myself. Unless they come out and say that, it's so hard to figure out what's going on. Just being completely fair. It's always hard. The problem is there's multiple instances. I get it. I get it.

I agree. Those premises, though, hmm. There's a few of them that are pretty original. I thought the counter guy, like her not being able to talk to the black guy, was pretty original. But who the fuck knows, man? Who knows? It's possible if one person came up with it, another person could come up with the same thing. Just you don't know. And the real problem lies in when people lie and steal and then pretend they didn't.

So if someone is, you know, you have bit, it's a killer bit. And this guy just swipes it and starts doing it and goes, dude, I came up with the exact same bit. I'm so sorry. And then starts doing it. Well, then you got an ethical problem. you got a real problem but if you both come up with the same bit like a tell is probably the best at it and uh one of the things that norton and i were talking about like a tell will go up to everybody when he has a a new bit if it seems like it came too easy if he's like where'd that come from is that if i heard this before he'll like he'll text you hey man have you heard this before he'll call you like he's real diligent about that and if somebody else already has one just chucks it aside and i think um that's the probably the best way to be just do what you think is

original and uh try to find out if anybody's already done it, I guess. But how the fuck do you do that? See, what I do is, or what I try to do, I've always tried to do this, except for you or Don Barris or Brody Stevens, I don't watch comedy. I don't like watching other comics. I don't want to be influenced by it. And I think if you, as a comic,

if you follow that kind of rule where you're not really watching comedy even if you did come up the same present you could you could say with a straight face look i've never seen you i don't watch comedy that's what i thought of you know that's true you could you could definitely look at it that way and there's but there's other comics that you always see in the back of the room they love comedy like watching comedy right you know and so if that happened to somebody like that, you'd be like, dude,

you've watched me do that joke 500 times. Right, but that's why I would have to tell you like in certain circumstances like jokes that are like really common,

like the one that you did know that was really common about the last 20 years, like what are you, like what year is he missing? Like what,

if you smoke cigarettes it takes 20 years off your life yeah you know yeah I like your take on it though your take on it's pretty funny cuz it's it's a ridiculous red band math equation yeah well I mean it's like 30 minutes a day just wake up an hour early you know exactly it's a ridiculous red band math equation but um can you copyright jokes I mean I'm like I know you't. I'm looking at it right now. You can, but like, would you have you or like, have you heard of someone doing it? You know, I think, look, there's a lot of us, man.

I mean, if you think about all the stand-up comics in the world, there's probably thousands of us, right? And for the most part, there's very few problems. And one of the reasons why there's very few problems is because we kind of police ourselves. And we make it a big point about being fair and about you know supporting artists that don't do it and not supporting artists who do do it and doesn't be just because someone has done it in the past too it

doesn't mean that they're a terrible person they can never redeem themselves they can never know doesn't mean that at all a terrible person. They can never redeem themselves. They can never. No, it doesn't mean that at all. It means they fucked up. People fuck up. People make mistakes. It doesn't let the world police itself kind of like the comedians. It'll take care of itself.

Well, I think more than anything, man, it's comedy fans that are policing it now. It's really interesting. And I say fans and I use it in the loosest term possible because some of them are actual fans of the person they're going after and some of them are just not you know some of them uh they've been looking for some reason why this person is no good for a while and then when they find this they just go wild with it and they love it um so they're not necessarily fans of the person so if they're making a video about her they're not necessarily fans of the person. So if they're making a video about her, they're not necessarily fans of her, but they might call themselves comedy fans, you know? And so they see something like this happen and they get furious.

Just have to be real careful because it's, there's, it's, it's, there's a giant issue with it being a bunch of people writing on a show and doing sketches. It's so fucking hard to know where those things are coming from. It's just real hard to know. It's interesting, though, that it always seems to happen. You know, like you had the Mind of Mincia. You got Amy Schumer's show. I saw the other day a John Heffron bit that made it up in Key and Peele.

Oh, really? Yeah. John Heffron bit that made it up in Keaton and Peele. Like it was almost, yeah. And, and it's, it, it seems like that maybe that the people that write for these kinds of shows don't think it's that bad, especially since it's all the same network. Well,

I think first of all, there's some people that write, and this isn't to hold standup comics in some crazy, um, high form of, uh of ethics and morality but there's some people that write on shows that are not stand-up comedians and their ideas about ideas are different than our ideas about our ideas what that what i mean by that is if they can get away with it some of them will pilfer an, whether it's take it from a book and

rearrange it, take it from a video and transcribe it and don't give the person credit who said it the first time. When people are taking jokes from comedians and using them to create sketches with them and pretending that they came up with them on their own, it's not cool. It's fucking gross. But they're're not they probably aren't comedians so it's like if you had like a really funny line for a joke that was a lyric of a song you know and you heard in a song and you're like oh i'm gonna put this in my act that's gonna i'm going to um have this amazing punch line in my act that is from this song so like the joke in the song is now i'm gonna pretend i came up with it on my own put in my act

it's like similar in that kind of a way you know i'm saying absolutely so like someone who's not a comic i don't think i don't wonder if they would they're not even a part of the comedy community they're a writer like fuck this dude's going to gank his shit. Yeah. He's just going to become productive. What are the odds these people are going to watch an old 20 years episode of what's happening?

You know? Or 40 years. How long ago was that on? A long time ago, right? Who the fuck's going to watch what's happening? Are you going to go over all those premises?

No, there might be a hilarious premise that they could pull out of that. Why did I say what's happening? What's happening was a terrible for sketches. I was trying to think of some like a ridiculous

old sitcom. I drew a blank. One thing I always thought was interesting is because just from watching so many roast battles and stuff like that is how roast jokes

are like the same jokes that they've used for you know years and years and years and years just kind of rebranded and like like and it used to be totally acceptable before there was internet before there was tv shows you know like the friars club and all that stuff like that they're all kind of like taken from each other and reusing shit that Charlie Chaplin may have said, you know. Yeah. And it's just interesting that that's like one of the few things in comedy that it's kind of like an unspoken thing. But who cares? You know, like it's no one's getting mad if you reuse a roast joke that that Milton Berle's mom made, you know, like.

Yeah, but they probably would if there are roast fans like Hinchcliffe would probably be mad because he's a roast fan yeah well now with TV and stuff like that it's interesting because like if they have like a roast like show on Comedy Central looks like a me or somebody does a joke on that and they reuse it in their roast few years later that now it's like oh you can't do that anymore even though I used to be able to do it and that was the whole thing you know I wonder if that's what the whole thing was I mean that's

what it was in the the Catskills days right in the the old days they would have these resorts like from dirty dancing that was cat skills right wasn't it man that's how fucked up cigarettes are man cigarettes took patrick swayze yeah dude we lost patrick swayze to cigarettes we lost the dude from roadhouse with the flowing locks you know how popular investor stallone flexes in the mirror every day. He's still alive. He's like 70. He looks great. You know how popular Dirty Dancing was and how popular that soundtrack was that they released a soundtrack like two months after that had none of the music from the movie, but it was just called like Dirty Dancing Soundtrack Part 2.

It was just a way to sell another CD. That is every girl's dream. a way to sell another CD. That is every girl's dream. A beautiful man who can dance. He's a really manly man who will fight to defend his right to dance. And he's got perfect cheekbones.

If I say that to any other girl... Are you kidding me? This guy dances. Get out of here. If I was a girl, I'd have babies with that dude. Totally. Yeah, you're on vacation.

You meet this guy. He's dangerous. He's got perfect hair. Beautiful features. He's supple. He knows how to move. He smokes cigarettes. He looks cool.

Cigarettes got him. Dude, Patrick Swayze's not that old. Do you understand? Like, this fucking guy died from cigarettes, and he's not that old. There's a lot of people that are way older than him that are doing great. And there's women that have been smoking two packs of cigarettes every day since their whole life, and they're 102. Right.

Right. But they look like monsters. They become monsters. Like, they just become, their body morphs and changes to accept the cigarettes. When you're like 100 and you're still smoking, you're like some fucking cigarette burning beast. Some thing that's inhaling this chemical that's a new part of your system. I've been smoking for about 26 years and I look like a fresh little baby. You're a part of the system now.

You're in the matrix. I might buy MBC. I might buy MBC. How many do you do every day? Like a pack. A whole pack a day? Mm-hmm. Wow.

But, you know, sometimes it's more, sometimes it's less. I think that's another thing that I might do on my podcast. Jesus. That's one of my other missions. Look at that.

That was him in the bitter end. He was still smoking. His body was rotting away, and he had a cigarette hanging out of his mouth. Doesn't seem like a good idea to continue to smoke when you have cancer. Jesus. Look at that. Look at him. Wow.

That's craziness. But it's weird because he was still getting treatment. It's weird, man. I wonder if he laid off of it for a while. Man, it's weird because he was still getting treatment it's weird man i wonder if like he laid off of it for a while man it's sad one and he did a television show because he was hot he was hot while this is all happening so he did a tv show and i'm sure that didn't help him man the long hours and the stress of the tv show i forgot about that tv show. What was it again? I don't remember. But he went out the hard way. Shit's real. Oh, that's what it was.

It was The Beast. 2009. Wow. Patrick Swayze. Damn, that's weird. Roadhouse. Rest in peace. He's a motherfucker, dude.

Roadhouse is the shit. To this day. Right? To this day, if you're flipping channels and roadhouses on just watch it just watch it it's on it's perfect it's a pretty classic movie it's a slice of americana it's like a piece of it's a piece of like civilization just strapped into some cultural iconic iconic, ridiculine movie. They just remade another movie that was a good one of his called Point Break,

which I heard it wasn't. I didn't see it, but I heard it wasn't great. The premise wasn't even the same movie, though, but are you worried about Roadhouse coming back out and being a totally different kind of thing? Isn't it Ronda? Ronda's going to do Roadhouse. It's going to be different.

She has a vagina. It's totally different. Did you see her on Saturday Night Live? No, I didn't. I heard it was good, though though did you hear it was good uh you know certain people really invest in in making it their own i think and then there's other people that kind of just go through the motions uh from what i saw it just seemed like the the latter that it just seemed i don't know she seemed like she did great job but she didn't like She's not a public speaker Yeah Probably

Hard as fuck to do For someone that isn't a public speaker Can you imagine? You know Yeah I mean I wonder Definitely

Especially if you're not used to it But Yeah it's an iconic thing to do man I'd be nervous as fuck Out of all the years I've done stand up If I had to host Saturday Night Live I'd be nervous as fuck Really?

Yeah Would you try? No If they ever asked you didn't do it. I'm not interested in working Yeah, I'll be just interesting though. I've done. I think I've done too much work. I Really do I'm interested in enjoying myself I just think at this stage of my life like the what I'm becoming more and more cognizant of as I get older Is you can work too much. It's not good. It's not good to work too much. Like there's a good amount of work you should do,

but there's a lot of people that like pride themselves in working too much and working and wearing themselves out. Like it's something they carry around like a shield, you know, that probably not if you don't have to do it. I understand if you have to do it, but if you don't have to do it, you should probably like have some fun, you know, like don't, don't get overwhelmed with the desire to succeed because that your whole life could pass you by. If you're one of those Gordon Gekko assholes, you know, your whole life could pass you by. If you're some crazy hedge fund sociopath on the loose, just sucking numbers out of the, out of the matrix with his fucking computer algorithms. Like that guy is just

connected to it. He's a part of it. So he's successful. But along the way, he's not even having any fun. You know, he's just living life in this constantly stressed, Adderall-induced, like, speedy, fucking decision-making, ass-kicking fucking mode all the time, know that guy ain't happy that's um it's a weird way to live life isn't it funny that somebody asked me the other day if i can

find the madderall i was like no i don't know anyone but if you need cocaine i can get that like like how weird is it that backwards? You ever been whitewater rafting? No. That's something you should try sometime. That's crazy. I've gone canoeing down the whitewaters. Not whitewaters.

I shouldn't even say whitewaters. Down a river. There were some tricky spots, like some spots near rocks and stuff like that, but nothing, like, real fast. The whitewater stuff looks Yeah, my dad almost died doing it once because he got caught underneath the raft and he said he couldn't breathe and he just Gave up and then there at the last second we was floating down somebody just grabbed him out of the water my friend Remy Warren Who's done the podcast a few times not the last time that he was on but the time before that I think the first time he was on, he, um, told me a story about, he was, uh, in the woods and he

saw a body come down the river and the guy's face down in the water. He saw some clothes and, uh, then he saw, like, he saw some gear, you know, floating, and then he saw a body. And he realized, oh, shit. And then he saw a woman, and the woman was bobbing her head up in the air and trying to survive and getting caught up in the current, and he ran into that fucking water thinking that he was going to die, thinking, like, I just made the biggest mistake. I'm going to try to help this lady. I'm going to wind up dying.

And he's a strong guy, and he's in really good shape. He hikes a lot in the mountains. He's very fit. For his television show, it's called Apex Predator. He did these VO2 max tests where they made him do sprints. They found out he's got a very high level of endurance just because he's constantly hiking in the mountains but still you jump into the water and you grab a hold of somebody they can drown you they could flail and you might not recover and you while you're flailing around you might hit a log you're going down this

water it's going really fast and what happened to these people was they were doing that in a raft and the current got really fast and they hit a downed tree and they got fucked up and the dude drowned and he died. And the woman survived, but barely. And she was freezing to death. The water was insanely cold. So this dude jumped in the water, pulled him out. Find out what number podcast is so we can tell people that are listening to this right now. But it's Remy Warren.

I'm pretty sure it was the first time he was on it's a country famous country singer just died kind of the same kind of situation 439 with dan dotey episode 439 with dan dotey that's the one yeah we also have it re-uploaded how many times did he come on by himself oh it's up the story's uploaded oh beautiful beautiful episode 4 by itself. Oh, beautiful, beautiful. Episode 439. He's awesome. That guy's a good dude. What was the question about this country singer?

Oh, the country singer. They found his body, and it seemed kind of like a similar thing. Yeah, he died of hypothermia. They were in a boat, apparently, and it just overturned. And it was in the water, and the storm was insane. And, you know, they tried to risk it. They tried to go out there, and he even made a tweet about it the night before. You know, saying he hopes he doesn't die.

Like, man, the storms are no fucking bullshit, man. They're no bullshit. Like, there's a video that I posted today that I retweeted that someone sent my way about a lightning striking Oh was a Matt Staggs one Matt Staggs sent it to me lightning striking in the middle of this like these Storm going on these guys around on the patio and they're like wow This is crazy and the guys like I wouldn't go out there and not with this weather and then boom The lightning hits the ground right in front of them play this shit. Where do you see this?

Dude shit myself first of all No, I'm not. Oh, Jesus. Holy shit. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Dude. Shit myself. First of all, fuck lightning. Fuck lightning. Lightning is an asshole force of nature. That is a shitty, dirty, cheap-shotting motherfucker.

Lightning is crazy. There's no rules either. Remy Warren got hit by lightning too. How about that? I got two Remy Warren stories. Remy Warren when he was a kid in high school got hit by lightning. Woke up with his fucking ears going, He told that story on the podcast as well. I think that was the same

story. God damn, Remy Warren's amazing. That's what it all boils down to. Remy Warren is amazing. Lightning hit right in front of me once I was in the basement That's not the same as getting hit He was fucked up. I was in the basement and they have those windows in the basement like we they have window wells and stuff like that and I was doing my laundry or something and Lightning hit right in front of me outside though

And then like the the arms of electricity like went all over like everything and it's scared the show Maybe it was actually an evil villain teleporting from the future Terminator style. Maybe you thought it was lightning Right. Remember that scene when Arnold is naked and giant Austrian schlongs hanging out Give me your clothes Remember that That movie was the shit Be meanwhile that's about to happen automated cars fucking drones look at this that's what it was he just appears

in that bubble that cut right through everything it was around it remember like a little circle and popped up that red. And that red. Big old dick. It's supposed to be like burnt metal. Why couldn't they give him some clothes? Why do you got to pretend that you can't teleport clothes, you fucks? You know, why does he got to be naked? You know, get out of here. What? What?

Get the fuck out of here with that. That's probably what it's going to be though, right? It is probably going to be once they figure out teleporting, you have to be by yourself. The first day someone gets scrambled because there's a glitch in the matrix when they're teleporting someone, and they come out a bucket of feet and eyeballs and dicks in their mouth, and they're twisted like a pretzel. The first time that happens, whoa, that's going to be a tough day. But we accept a certain amount of car accidents you know we accept thousands and thousands of car accidents

every year you just think about how many people die if we were thinking like our real enemy is the automobile automobiles are killing people with you know people driving them but the automobiles hitting into people people hitting things in their automobiles that's what's killing people if you really looked at it that way the numbers are pretty high i think it's like 30 000 people or something crazy dying automobile accidents every year yeah if that was uh an enemy you know a robot enemy that came from space was killing 30 000 people a day we wouldn't be so fucking nonchalant about it you know but because we're driving around oh the fly is he doing teleportation that way he was working on back yes well that was he this was actually a

remake of a really old movie from the black and white days was awesome it was really awesome go find the old fly yeah i need to re-watch that but the fly the, was it 86? Yeah. 88 it says. 88? Yeah, 86 for that first one but here's the other one. Oh, okay. So for the Jeff Goldblum one, it's fucking awesome. It's really good.

I loved it. Jeff Goldblum was such a bad motherfucker when he was young, man. Especially in that movie. Like, I really believed

that's the original. Is that Vincent Price? Mm-hmm. That's amazing. Look at that that's a crazy look at that fucking picture oh my god vincent price he was the man when it came to old school monster movies but like jeff goldblum in that fly movie you believe that he was really a mad scientist like i believe like this guy the way he talks he's just so different and interesting he he had a way of talking about him like this guy could be some hyper human who could figure

something like this out I totally bought it hook line and sinker like there's some people that play um they play scientists and like bitch you ain't fucking smart right come on son you ever see the movie sunset boulevard look at. Where's his dong? Yeah. Way different. I bet he's got a giant dong. Look at his confidence. Look at his face. Large hands.

Bet it's a hog. Yeah, he's got a huge dick, you can tell. It's crazy to fly. Let a fly in there. Did you ever see Sunset Boulevard? No, what was that? That's a great movie. I highly recommend it.

I watch it. That's my go-to. Like, I put it on every night before I go to bed. That's not the mockumentary or a dramamentary or whatever they call it. It's a movie. This is an old school classic movie. Wasn't there a recent movie about sunset?

Yeah, that was a documentary about sunset. It was a documentary? It was a documentary. So there was no acting in it at all? Okay, I got confused. There's more than one that was out at the same time? One was a documentary? Yeah. It was a documentary? Yeah. So there was no acting in it at all? Right. Okay, I got confused. There's more than one that was out at the same time? One was a film? No, I think it's the same one. I think it's...

I keep hearing I have to check that out, though. The documentary. Yeah. Yeah, it's good. It's interesting. You really learn about the Sunset Boulevard. You know, I was on Fraszier's radio show the other day. Frazier Smith?

Yeah. I love Frazier Smith. He's a great guy. You know, there's not much left on Sunset. Besides the rainbow and the comedy story, there's not much. That's it. Everything's getting torn down and become condos now. It's almost dead.

Dita Von Teese, rat. I just went to the Whiskey at Go-Go for the first time on Friday. Oh, really? It was surprisingly small. Yeah. I mean, it would have been awesome to see Motley Crue and Jimi Hendrix or anyone in the doors back in the day,

but I saw a band, I saw them for the first time when I was a teenager in high school, Orgy. And I saw they were on the billboards, so I went and saw them, and I probably should have just stayed home. How dare you? That's where Lemmy's birthday party was

right before he died. Yeah, the Roxy and the place next to it, the rainbow, those are icons, man. That rainbow is an icon. The rainbow feels like it was made by the same person as the comedy story. You go in there and you go like, I feel like the same here.

It's a legit old school Hollywood place. You ever eat at Dan Tana's? Dan Tana's on Santa Monica. Dude. It's like you go into the past. The menus, the way the waiters are dressed, the food's amazing. It's really small, right, too? Yep.

Well, it's not really small, but it's not giant. One side's more of a bar, but there's tables on that side. But the food is amazing. The food is incredible. And it's like so old school, man. The whole place is just, it feels it when you get in there. You feel like you got class. Like you want to order a martini just to be an asshole. Like, come on, gentlemen.

It's right next to the Troubadour on Sunset. Yeah. That's the coolest place I've ever seen a concert in my life. Troubadour, really? Yeah. I mean, I've never been to Red Rocks, which I've heard is also cool. That's the coolest place I've ever seen a concert in my life. Troubadour? Really? Yeah. I mean, I've never been to Red Rocks, which I've heard is also cool.

That's a big place to see in Denver, but as far as small venue where you can see like a real awesome concert with maybe 200 people and real big names play there frequently.

Just for fun? That's like where they work out? That's awesome, man. God damn. Yeah, it's a crazy spot, that Sunset Strip. Yeah, but it's on the way out.'s well it's becoming something different for sure like that giant billboard that's right in front of the store that's it's it's movies like whose idea is it to take a fucking road

that already has plenty of accidents and put up a giant fucking multi-colored super bright billboard that you almost need sunglasses to look at. And it's playing videos. So you're watching videos as you're driving. Well, what is this? Well, what's he doing? Well, that's wacky. He just do a flip.

Crash. Yeah. It should be so illegal. People, you're not even allowed to text. If you're not allowed to text, why are you allowed to read? Why do you have a gigantic 100-foot fucking TV screen? That's not a billboard, asshole. If you want to have a billboard, have a billboard.

That's a movie theater. You get a movie screen up there. The fuck? It should be so illegal. Well, they let it be legal. It's there. So as we're driving, we're watching shit. And what do they do?

Is it still images that keep changing? No, it's moving images. Because you'll see, like, Chris D'Elia, like, Undateable, this Thursday. And they're, like, moving around, like, throwing things and stuff. Like, it's completely just commercials. For sure? No, it's moving images because you'll see like Chris D'Elia like, Undateable, this Thursday and they're moving around like throwing things and stuff. It's completely

just commercials. For sure? Yeah, for sure. For sure. Yeah, I see it every day. Even if it's still, when still images are moving

or changing them every couple seconds or so, you're like, what are you doing? Why are you distracting people? I think they've made it illegal in a lot of cases.

It should totally be illegal. I think that for some reason has like a lot of cases. I think that for some reason has like a get out of free jail card or something. Get out of free jail? Whatever. Well, it's kind of like Times Square. Times Square's got that pass too. It's almost like part of the charm of the place that you go there. You're just going to be, wow, look at all the lights. This is crazy. But the idea of Times Square is you're getting out of a cab or you're climbing off the subway and you're looking around. You're not driving in that fucking thing. How many people go visit New York and drive in Times Square

and go, Jesus Christ. That's a giant ball of neon. It's chaos. Like Vegas is the same way. You ever see some of those casinos? They have goddamn huge movie screens playing on the outside of their casino, showing you people singing, fucking rocking out, carrot topping, bah. All this shit's going on as you're driving down the street.

And you're on Coke. And you're trying to drive slow. That's so funny. You're trying to keep it together. What's this fucking movie? Why are they showing me this? Cirque du Soleil, you know? That's something that's pretty fucking specific.

Think about that show. Like, if you go to Cirque du Soleil, you need to see, like, almost superhuman feats of physical fitness. Like, they had one of those Cirque du Soleil dudes. This is, like, a perfect contrast to what we were doing. We were eating over at i guess it's like wolfgang pucks is right over by the cirque du soleil place we were eating and this dude was uh coming from the cirque du soleil like he had been he'd been working there and in the

middle of the hallway while we were stuffing our face with food this dude just starts doing back flips he did like one two three four five backflips and landed and laughed and laughed with his friend and fucking button up his shirt and get out of there but like this dude like just flipped through the air and then started going feet to hands feet to hands feet to hands jump and we're like whoa well we got mouthful linguine with clams trying to put a fucking damper on this buzz Before I go to sleep This dude is flipping

Doing flips down the hallway What is that parkour Those guys I saw a video the other day This guy's just on top of this building And just jumps down through this thing And jumps in through a window It's amazing what those guys do That's craziness jumps down through this thing, like go and jumps in through a window.

It's amazing what those guys do. Like that's, that's craziness. I'm becoming a grumpy old man. Cause this, uh, this, this lady was like her son, uh, broke his arm doing parkour. And I'm going, Oh, is that what they're calling it these days? Cause when I was a kid that was called being an asshole. That's what I wanted to say. I didn't say that. I went, oh, is that what they're calling it these days? Because when I was a kid, that was called being an asshole. That's what I wanted to say. I didn't say that. I went, wow, is he okay?

That's what I said. I said, wow, is he okay? But how come it has to have a French name? How come it has to be international? What you're doing is you're a crazy fucker. You're running and doing flips off of railings and shit. All right, be careful. This kid, I know that for his birthday he does that.

That's what kids do nowadays. They rent out rooms that just sort of look like, I don't know, outside. Well, dude, I passed by this place, and right next to the place I was going, there was a parkour studio. I was like, what is this? They're teaching people how to do this? And apparently they're all over the place now. It's super popular.

And they have ones that look like Super Mario Brothers. Oh, my God. Yeah, this one. Oh, my God. And this one's in Los Angeles. And it's just like grown adults fucking jumping around. These are kids, man. What do you mean?

No, that's a cat's a kid. It's a little boy. Hey. It's a little child that's doing flips. Wow, these kids are freaks. Wow, that's pretty impressive, though. Who's going to pay for their ACL surgeries? Exactly.

Damn, that is really impressive shit, though. That kid just doing that flip off the building. You know, that is really impressive stuff. Come on, man. And they're just doing it to look cool. I guess, right? Are there competitions? I mean, a little bit. Look at this. Come on, man. And they're just doing it to look cool. I guess, right? Are there competitions?

I mean, a little bit. Look at this. American Ninja Warriors really picked up, and that's kind of what these, that's the main competition I think these guys can go do. What that guy just did was exactly what that dude did in front, like back it up a little bit. Like to the dude that's doing, no, before that. The dude that was doing the flips. Right there. Look at this. That's. The dude that was doing the flips. Right there.

Look at this. That's what the guy was doing in the hotel. Like, no bullshit. Hand, feet to hand, feet to hand. Have you ever even tried to do that? Like, on a diving board or water? Yeah, I've done it on diving boards. I've never even...

There's no consequences. Yeah, you gotta be careful. I've hurt my back and neck before, too, so I'm very wary about things that might potentially be horrible for my fucking spine. Whoa, these people are crazy. It seems so strange to watch people move their bodies in ways you know you can't move yours. Like, how? What?

Mind off. Like, if you saw yourself doing that, you you're like, how can I do this? What do I have superhero powers now? I find it more interesting watching people doing these this kind of stuff in real-life Situations like around the streets because it's like they're ninjas They can like break into how like buildings just by doing this parkour shit like no, right like double jump. I know it's weird It's weird they Do a barrel roll. It's weird.

They can do things with their bodies that regular people just can't. You just keep practicing it. But these are all like cement things they're jumping around on, are they? What are these things made out of? I don't know. It's probably drywall. Drywall, yeah.

But wouldn't it just cave in? I don't know. They're running around on drywall like that? That shit has to be super flimsy. It would have to be more than drywall. It's probably like what they make skate ramps and stuff out of. Yeah. This is crazy.

It just keeps going. Is that a girl or a guy with a long-ass ponytail? Is it a girl? Yeah. Whoa. She's doing flips and shit. What if the future of UFC and shit is a room like this and both fighters just

Start on each side of their room and they're like around and do like ninja moves Yeah, like a quaker entering into a quake room yeah Wow Imagine if that would be the more sophisticated high-level version of MMA when we do it virtual reality style that two guys start out in a building and they don't know where the other person is in the building. And so you have to be real sneaky and walk around and you're allowed to hit the person if they don't see you. Exactly. It's more realistic. It's more realistic. Look back at boxing and you're like, look how dumb that is. They can't jump on the ground, and they can't do it. Now imagine doing this and being like, look how dumb that is.

We're in an octagon? What the fuck? No, how about a building, and this guy's trying to rape you, and you're using shadows on walls. I wonder if people would give up weight classes if they were willing to use weapons. Like, okay, look, I'll take a 50-pound weight disadvantage, but I want brass knuckles. You know? I'm remembering this TV show.

I really cannot remember the name of it, but it's almost like that. No, it was like a real-life, it was fake, but it was like real-life Mortal Kombat. Gilligan's Island? And they shot around Universal Studios, and they'd go to different sets, and they'd be in a central area and be like, this team versus this team. The first fight's going to be here, and they'd go off to the lake,

and they'd go fight at the lake. Oh, yeah. What the hell was that? I'm trying to look for it. I have no idea what it was. Oh, my. I totally forgot about that. It's almost like what you're saying, but, I mean,

that was the wrestling WWE version a little bit. Wow. That's right. See? There you go. I bit. Wow. That's right. See? There you go. I'm a thief. That's how easy it is to be a thief. That shit.

We were talking about something. That's completely out of the ether. Yeah, but I like the idea of, like, what if it was like the real world? There's a camera in every room, and, you know, one person started in the attic, one person started in the basement, and you're trying to kill the other person, you know one person started in the attic one person started

in the basement and you're trying to kill the other you know like beat up but i think there's got to be an element of virtual reality like to for to watch it like because we can't be there right but to watch and get the best angles you should be able to watch the perspective of both people yeah the perspective of the guy doing the beating up and the perspective of the guy getting beat up the perspective of the guy that doesn't know the guys behind him and The perspective of the guy doing the beating up and the perspective of the guy getting beat up, the perspective of the guy that doesn't know the guy's behind him, and the perspective of the guy who knows that the guy doesn't know and is sneaking up on him ready to jack him, that would be wild, man. It would be wild to see something like that.

Like UFC mixed with a horror movie. Imagine if you could see the punches coming your way and see yourself getting knocked unconscious. Like, boom. Like, how is he seeing it? Like, you see it. You see the sparks that he sees in front of his eyes. And your fucking consciousness dims in and out just like he does. It might be a way that they could almost experience getting fucked up and beat up to know how bad it is.

Would it have a reboot? Yeah. How dare. Ladies and gentlemen, do not panic. If you're just listening to the audio version of this podcast only, you know what happened. What happened is this goddamn TriCaster shit out again. Is that like a normal thing with the TriCaster?

It's happened a couple times, but it hasn't happened for a long time. It's happened multiple times over our podcast. Yeah, different versions of it. This was a complete PC freeze. Otherwise, other times it's been just an internet disconnection. Do we have to make an upgrade? Is there anything we need to do? I don't know.

Should we upgrade our system? That's like the best you can get. You really can't get any better than a TriCaster. Seriously, man. If we can do it at the level that he's been doing it right now with something like that, you don't want it to be more complicated than that. It's perfect. Yeah.

That thing's perfect. It just fucks up every now and then. And then it gives us something to bitch about. Fucking TriCaster. TriCaster. I don't know, man. Those things, they're complicated as fuck. They're going to shit out on you every now and then, I think. It's just, we're streaming things in hd uh mkbhd he stopped by here one time he's making he makes those cool uh youtube videos sort of like unbox therapy i think he's friends with them

he made a cool video recently talking about 4k and the state of it now and kind of like where we are and like you can watch 4k on a tv like that. You can watch some of it on your phone. But really you can only get it from like Netflix and YouTube. And it's going to take a long time before like it would take what happened for us to get really good internet here. You have to dig up the ground, put in some new cables to get the bandwidth to go. Because it's a lot of information you're trying to send. Yeah, but they could just also fix the math of it. The compression could easily be fixed by like a JPEG version for 4K,

like something that compresses 4K down into something. But would it have the same image quality? Yeah, I mean, look at bitmaps and JPEGs. You can't tell the difference between those two. With the naked eye, you can't, right? But can you tell if you're looking at it through a lens or anything like that? T-Mobile just got in trouble recently because Because they unlimited data or whatever for not unlimited

No, they what they do is they downgrade it to 480p So when you're on your phone watching 480p, you're not gonna know the fucking difference between 720p and 480p on your phone. I would know bro. I would know. Verizon for life bro. For most people's phones. Verizon for life bro. Fucking Sprint for the win. Fuck Verizon.

Tang for the win. AT&T. Yes. Who was it that did it to you? T-Mobile. Fuck T-Mobile. No. T-Mobile was my friends. Like 480 is bullshit bro. Who do you have right now? This-Mobile. No. T-Mobile was my friends. Like 480s bullshit, bro. Who do you have right now? This one's Verizon. Verizon. And then the same phones for the studio. Yeah. I like the new Galaxy phones. I think this is the first series of Galaxy phones where they have

features that are sort of built in that make you go wow huh like don't they all have charging uh wireless charging now uh yeah a gang of them do yes but you know what i've noticed with white with wireless charging is that it charges slow and sometimes you'll put your phone on the little dock thing and it doesn't sit right and then you don't have a charge and so then you're like what the fuck i don't know it's still there right now now. There's a company. I forget who it is I think it's Apple that just filed a patent for wireless charging for like like I'm gonna die. Yeah We're not gonna be able to breathe the air. It's gonna be filled with electrical currents. How's that possible? Well think about it, dude Just 250 billion gallons of methane are being pumped in the air, okay?

And that's floating. How many pounds of Wi-Fi are we eating right now while we're eating this podcast? Maybe that's what's going on with America. We're so overweight because we're eating Wi-Fi. That's my new theory. We're eating Wi-Fi and 4G LTE. The only thing it's doing is making more autistic people. We were okay with 3G, up to 3G, and then then we fell apart we're just eating too much it's weight and autism well you think it gives people autism

yeah yeah serious yeah i think there's something to it or autism is just on the rise like so hot right now like no no i mean but yeah but i think there's a bunch of different causes that they think uh i think they think genetics they think uh people when they get older and have children much more likely uh that the children are going to have autism becomes they become much more susceptible as the parents get like older and older it's like directly proportionate they think but there's a lot of questions but what causes it or and whether or not it's more prevalent today or whether the diagnosing of it is more prevalent i believe that's that's debatable you know when there's more people today so obviously there's going to be more cases of it but are they the same percentage of cases like

one of the things that they've always tried to correlate is marijuana with schizophrenia and the problems that were exposed, I think in the culture high, they had this where they were saying that the instances of schizophrenia have been uniform throughout history for when we've been monitoring it. It's like 1% of the population, 1% of the population schizophrenic, like just because that 1% may or may not have smoked marijuana it doesn't raise it when marijuana becomes more popular when it gets used more it still stays at 1% it doesn't seem to vary from 1%

it's just a 1% deviation it's like the quality control of God is not the best in the world yeah I don't think it's weed I think it's mushrooms and acid and psychedelics that actually speed up that kind of stuff. I mean, I know so many people that have tripped and never came back. If you have mental health issues, anything is not good for you.

Alcohol is certainly not good for you. Mental health issues, you have a hard enough time just remaining stable when you're sober. They're so good in bed. Some of them. Yeah, unfortunately. have a hard enough time just remaining stable when you're sober if you're one of those people some of them yeah unfortunately unfortunately why is that you know tony tony's era from uh columbus remember tony oh yeah rancid turtle rancid rancid turtle had always the best fucking explanation for that he like he made some play of words with psychotic and erotic we always talk about it but But it's so true. It's the common theme that everybody always says.

Crazy girls are the best in bed. True. And probably girls think crazy guys are the best in bed, which is why dirty dancing was so appealing to young ladies in the 1980s. Patrick Swayze, smooth, hairless chest, sleek body, moves like a dancer, flies across the room. Is that I Had the Time of My Life? Is that the one?

And I had the time of my life. Well, listen, bitch, you're only 18, okay? There's plenty of years coming. Don't get so crazy about nostalgia. Oh, my God, the good old days when I was 18. What the fuck is wrong with you? How about you keep running it?'t don't get us to do Have you ever had a

Clip that like something pops out of it like it like almost like a like a tongue like a cow tongue comes out You say a clitoris yeah, yeah like that, but it pops out randomly like I'm talking about dirty dance Like we're supposed to know what the fuck you just said. Like a pussy boner, but when it actually comes out, like sticks out and goes in. It's called a dick, Brian. No. You're fucking a guy. No.

Fucking a guy again? Is it a bodybuilder? No. No? That does happen with bodybuilders. Really? Yeah, with female bodybuilders if they take steroids. But it was like a pussy.

It was like a boner that was in the pussy that just came out. I've never seen it before. It freaked me out. There's some crazy fucking videos. You're grabbing it like it's a fucking giraffe's neck. Look at the hand gestures you're making. You're not polite. You're not like, it was a dainty little penis.

It was a tiny little thing. Nothing to be offended by. It was nothing that's going to scare children. It's nothing that's going to hurt anybody's feelings. Just a little tiny penis that's inside the woman's vagina. I don't know why it's there. Maybe you fucked with her in Aphrodite. Is that how it works?

No, I was eating it and it just started hitting me in the chin. Okay, you're sucking a dick. You're sucking a dick and you're on mescaline. Okay, Valiums. You were talking about Valiums. I get it. Dude, somebody drugged you and sucking a dick. You're sucking a dick and you're on mescaline. Okay, Valiums. You were talking about Valiums. I get it. Dude, somebody drugged you and made you bomb. Like, yeah, there's a fucking nice dick inside my pussy, right?

You're like, yeah, pussy's so hot. You don't know why you're gagging. I'm just eating pussy that feels like I'm sucking a dick. It's about pussy balls. Smelling that dude's butt. You're like, that is not a girl's butt. There's no way. You like that big dick inside that pussy? Meanwhile, you wake up all quaaluded out.

What the fuck happened? Who dosed me? I just never saw it that violent before. Like, it actually coming out. You're getting just choked. It looked like it. Giant, fat, fucking... Like a small boxer's arm.

Like a 135-pound champion arm. You know, like one of those Mexican dudes that throws a nasty left hook to the body. Like a Salvador Sanchez arm. Ropey and fucking sinewy. Slamming in the back of your throat. Slap, slap. Fucking

Quaaludes. Okay, so an asteroid's coming and you have ten minutes to run out in the street. Do what? Just fuck everyone that's else in the street. Do what? Just fuck everyone else in the street taking off their clothes. I don't think anybody's getting it up.

It's going to be the saddest thing in the world. You get hit in the head by a rock and you're too nervous to get it up. Then why is it? You're ready to bang your sister. Finally, we get to do this. We've been staring at each other for 35 years. Let's fucking do this. She's like, fuck yeah.

I always wanted to fuck my brother. He spits on his dick and he's trying to get it hard and that fucking thing keeps getting closer and closer. And she's like, come on. Come on. We're going to die. You're such a fucking loser. I always knew you were a loser. I give you a chance to fuck me.

The asteroid is coming and you fucking blew it, Charlie Brown. You blew it charlie brown you blew it charlie brown and you see the asteroid getting bigger and bigger and the last memory this guy has is he transforms and changes and and connects with hyperspace is him not being able to get it up while his sister screamed at him in the street staring at an asteroid it makes me wonder though because i feel like there is going to be a large amount of people if that happens happens, that will run into the street and be like, that's it, let's just fuck each other. All the people that no one wants to fuck.

They're like, finally! Let's do this! No, they're going to run past you and they're going to bang that hot milf that fucking mows their lawn in high-heeled shoes. Every fucking street has that one crazy lady that just puts out the scent. Meow!

Just meow! Puts that heat scent out in the air. It is probably going to be mass rapes, and that's all it is. Like people just busting down doors trying to. That girl. Ooh, that's what I'm talking about. That's what I'm saying. Miss Parker from Friday. Who is that?

Miss Parker. Miss Parker from Friday? Hey, Miss Parker. Oh, please go full screen with this. Let me see her. Whoa. God me see here. Whoa. God damn. Exactly.

The asteroid flies by. The asteroid flies by and there's all these people that fuck that shouldn't have fucked. Then they have babies like Kanye and Catelyn have a kid together. It's called the asteroid generation. I don't mean to objectify this young lady, but that is a very strong part of her anatomy. Very strong. I don't need to objectify her, but

congratulations on hitting the genetic lottery. Look at the height of that ass. In that position, it should retain a little flatness. The thing must look ridiculous when she stands straight up. Let's see it now, Jamie. No, no, don't do that. She should retain a little flatness. That thing must look ridiculous when she stands straight up.

Let's see it now, Jamie. Ridiculous. Let's see her now. No, no, don't do that. Don't blow this whole thing. Look at that butt shadow. Don't be so mean about the universe and time. Is there a photo of her butt just standing there?

Or is that it? Her right above. Mark! Mark! It's not her right above, is it? No. Is that her down there too, watering? Right there? Oh, good lord.

What is it about hips to waist ratio? You know? Oh my goodness. What a good kid. The genetic motherfucking lottery. That's why it must fucking suck. It must fucking suck if you wished you looked like that and you didn't. Just looking at her, especially if you're a guy.

Say if you're a guy and you feel like you identify being a woman, but you really want to look like that. But meanwhile, you look like Ralphie Mae or you look like Joey Diaz. I think I'd be a sexy as fuck woman. I've never dressed up as a woman. That's not true. I think I'd be gorgeous. I'm just clearing it up right now.

That's so not true. Look at these hips. You definitely have womanly hips. You would look like you already shat out all your kids, though. Dude, we should dress up as a woman one episode. She used to be a Barker Beauty, apparently, too. Really? Yeah. Back in the day. What a good kid. We should see who could be prettier. She used to be a Barker Beauty, apparently, too. Really? Yeah, back in the day.

What a good kid. We should see who could be prettier. She was a Playboy? What's that right there? Why does it say Playboy? She's got naked pictures. Good for her. Good for her.

You know, that's another thing, I think. There's nothing wrong with Playboy, folks. Nothing wrong with naked bodies. But there's nothing wrong with porn, either.. Nothing wrong with naked bodies. But there's nothing wrong with porn either. But we're not there yet, right? Getting close. People are getting closer, for sure. It's way more acceptable nowadays.

The kids know what it is nowadays. I didn't know there was all this crap. Yeah, anyone can just look at porn. Do you think that VR stuff can save porn? Save it? Where's it going? That's like, do you think that better cooking can save porn? Save it? Where's it going? That's like, do you think that better cooking can save food? They won't give it away for free, so you have to buy it.

They won't give it away for free. Yeah, but see, dude, I think in a lot of ways what's going to happen with some of the artists, like I use the most respectful term possible, is they can make personal appearances. They can make a ton of money doing that. Like, sort of like, almost like musicians that don't sell too many CDs now. Like, it's hard. Other than Apple,

maybe Apple should get in the porn business. Say, fuck it. Stop being pussies about it. Just get in. Could you imagine if Apple just decides to go whole hog and has an adult app, okay? And you open up their adult app. It comes in the operating room.

It's just called Adult. And you enter in all your information that shows you're of a certain age. And you know how you do the thumbprint thing? You have to do the thumbprint thing to activate it so they know it's you and not someone using your phone that knows your code that isn't of age. And then you watch as much fucking porn as you want. Booyah! They should do it.

They're stupid not to do it you could buy it then the actors could get paid exactly notice i said actors actors models luckies ever see that bill hicks bill about models like here's here's debbie modeling a 12 inch dick in her mouth like i i did it no justice i'm trying to remember it was I'm saying it you know Bill Hicks is Alex Jones right that's what I heard What is this your iPhone can be hacked with a photo of your thumb Jesus? Of course it could be your iPhone could be hacked while you're asleep Yeah, the government the government is already reading your your tweets. I

Twitter messages I tried that though like my I was dating a girl and I did the whole thumb to see if it would work. I did That's so rude so Not as rude as what Esther does little Esther goes while her boyfriend's in the bathroom and turns on location Shit where so she can just track them all day long shit where so she can just track them all day long isn't that weird that's a option in your phone that a lot of people don't know is i can turn on my location tracking and send it to you so you can just track me for life if that is so weird that people even want to do that they want to like follow people what the fuck are you up to jamie how about people that would do that to their employees make sure their employees stay within a certain range. I don't want you going out on the road this weekend and getting all tired.

I want you to be fresh for work Monday. But, Mr. Wilson, you can't tell me where to go in the world this weekend. Well, if you want a promotion, you'll be the guy that stays in and gets some rest. Is that possible? I mean, if bosses can tell you that you have't have that you have to have a piss test Okay, if they could piss test you what they're saying is they want to make sure you didn't smoke some pot on the weekend Right if you get there Monday like I know guys who won't smoke pot because they worried they're gonna get tested Randomly at work and it would cost them their job. It would you get fired?

So if you get you smoke a joint on Friday after work You know the fights are on you get a pizza with your friends, you guys smoke a joint, you have a laugh, you watch pizza, and then you show up Monday morning, do you really think they're going to be affected by that joint? Nope, not at all. But they'll test positive. They're going to test positive. That's the same thing.

It's just like your boss is telling you mentally to stay put. I mean, that's the same thing. That's what they're doing. I used to have to do that. I remember when I would smoke weed, and I'd be like, God damn, I smoked weed. Now I better not get tested in the next couple weeks. I was freaking out looking at the calendar like shit.

And they can have a zero-tolerance policy. They could write it into their contract because it's an illegal drug. And they just fire you, man. And you can have totally non-psychoactive levels in your system. It doesn't matter. Totally sober. And also, there's no science that backs that there's long-term effects of, you know, you smoke a joint on Friday night and, you know, a Monday morning, some sort of a long-term. There's nothing.

And if there is, judge the person based on their performance at work. Don't, you know, you can't. If someone's not doing their job at work, that's why they check each other out, and that's why they have assessments and stuff, and that's why you have meetings with your supervisors. That's what that's for. It has nothing to do with what... One person could be a fucking moron

and never touch a drop of alcohol and never smoke and never do anything their whole life, and they could be a fucking moron. You don't get brownie points. You don't get extra points for not doing drugs. You just don't's like what happens when the guy does is he okay what if he has a couple of drinks on friday and uh he shows up monday morning fresh as a daisy he worked out the gym at 5 30 and he's fucking here ready to rock and roll what do you give a fuck like it's stupid it's a stupid like distinction to put on, to think that somehow or another it's bad.

Yeah. I read an article this weekend about Netflix. They offer unlimited vacation time to their workers as long as they get their work done. So theoretically, I guess you go get high and take two weeks off and come back and be free. Fuck yeah, Netflix. Killing it again. Right.

I'm addicted to Narcos, man. I'm like seven episodes in now. I did the seventh one last night. Fuck, that show's good. God damn, it's good. It's a fucking well-made show. It's like a movie every week. You know?

It's crazy that it's all based on a true story. Pablo Escobar was insane. You gotta watch this series, folks. you gotta watch this series folks you gotta watch this series because it's all based on real events and you realize how unbelievably insane escobar was and the amount of power and money that guy had it's incredible it's beyond imagination and they did such a great job of building up the production, of showing, like, how they started making it and selling it and showing the impact of it. And fuck, it's good.

Fuck, it's good. Did you hear about the guy in Miami who recently bought a house? And when they were excavating some of the property, they found a safe. And it was Pablo Escobar's former house. Oh, shit. So he told the press. And the first safe got stolen. And they found a second safe.

And they told the press again I don't think It's now being kept somewhere So they can I don't think they've opened it Or found out what's in it But Guy's an asshole Yeah

Keep your mouth shut son Don't you have friends What do you like Get a friend And a shovel And a pickup truck It's time to get rich I wonder if

That money's flagged You know Probably If there's money in it If it's gold Open up the safe And it's just Another safe I wonder if that money's flagged. Probably if there's money in it. If it's gold. Open up the safe and it's just another safe. Heads. All people that Pablo Escobar hated. Safe found.

Safe found within concrete of the late drug king. Wow, that's amazing. Fuck, man. They said the mansion was believed to just be used as stash cash. Dude, you you got to watch this series it's incredible it's incredible when you realize how much money that guy had and how much power and how much havoc he caused and that it wasn't that long ago and now they say columbia is like really safe and really nice like columbia is a totally different place now now that

all that shit's done with they're like no it's nice. They figured it out. Bourdain went there for a show, and you see what it's like now. It's like, it's really beautiful. They actually worked their way through this issue. It's crazy. Because people think of Colombia, and you think of the Medellin cartel. You think of the drug killings. It's like

one of the most iconic things about it. And then coffee. I also saw the drones being used to carry drugs over the border one of the most iconic things about it, right? And then coffee. Yeah. Right? I also saw the drones being used to carry drugs over the border. Yeah. To Mexico this weekend. Into prisons, even. Yeah.

People are using drones to do things. Madness. God damn it. All right, I got to get the fuck out of here. It's 4.17 right now. Wednesday, Brian Redband. I believe there's a show going on. Yeah. In the living room.

We're doing a Death squad secret show with you and ari shafar how is it a secret if you're telling everybody because there's a secret cast that i'm not gonna tell you about oh you're so tricky but john heffron rory school dean delray nice and that starts at 8 30 comedy store main room we're full and uh I'm doing Dom Herrera's show today at the Laugh Factory at 8. And then the Dean Del Rey show after that. The 50th birthday show. That's at the El Rey Theater. And that's Brian Redband.

Chris, who else is with you? Chris D'Elia, Bill Burr, Joe Bartnik. Joe Bartnik, Bill Burr, Chris D'Elia, and me. We're going to have some fun. And Dean Del Rey, of course, who's turning 50. All right, you fucking fucking animals Thank you very much Appreciate the hell out of you people The hell

The hell The heck How about that I wanted to say fuck But I don't want to say fuck twice in a row like that Because it sounds ignorant Good night Goodbye

Much love Big kiss Mwah mwah mwah mwah Mwah Wow.