The Joe Rogan Experience - #830 - Neal Brennan

Episode Date: August 3, 2016

Neal Brennan is a stand-up comedian, actor, writer, director and producer. He is known for co-creating and co-writing "Chappelle's Show" with Dave Chappelle.

I got stories. I got that magnetic shit I did to my brain. Live. Now, is it happening? It's happening. Right now. Crazy how it works out like that, right? Yeah. What were you just about to say? Magnetic shit? I was about to say I did some magnetic shit to my brain.

What? Yeah, I feel like I'm your depression correspondent. Like I go out and do crazy shit. I did that. Alright, so it's called... I talked about it last time i was here i was gonna do it i did um i did ketamine which i gotta say i cannot recommend really yeah i did three no actually i did six sessions uh which was crazy did Did it. But the side effects long term were my eyes burnt for straight up two to three months every day. Burnt?

Yeah, just like burnt. Like I needed drops constantly. Like you stared at the sun burnt? No, like irritated. Like you got something in them? Yeah, more like that. And I just felt like kind of groggy and out of it for a couple

months really yeah then i did um let's explain that okay so yeah yeah well i talked about it last time i was here but i did yeah uh yeah because i got a lot of talk about you were gonna do it or you i don't maybe i was gonna do it i think you had done it yeah i had done it and i was it was still too early to tell but i remember running into in the hall the comedy store and you were super happy it was amazing the first time i did it the first two sessions were great and then after that i kind of hit a plateau and and the the i just kind of felt like just kind of like groggy for i'm not kidding like a couple months so the first session you did you get this positive benefit from it yeah what's the point in continuing uh you're because the the the treatment is six sessions the protocol

yeah that's the protocol so um hold on i think i have video of it too hold on yeah i know i have video twitching and no it's not even that interesting you're just in a basically in like a hospital room right but and uh but experience itself, you said, was full-blown psychedelic. Straight up fucking 100% tripping balls. And this is all FDA approved? It's FDA approved as an anesthetic. Right. It's not FDA approved.

Actually, you know what? It's getting there. I think it is there, actually. Because otherwise we wouldn't be able to talk about it. Right. It's not FDA approved. Actually, you know what? It's getting there. I think it is there, actually. Because otherwise we wouldn't be able to talk about it. It is approved as an off-label depression treatment. Off-label's tricky shit, isn't it? Yes.

Because there's no... They don't know. Yeah. Maybe. I mean, that's all of them, in some ways. Especially with antidepressants, it's all like, yeah, this might... this could do something, maybe not. I like that there's stuff that they can do to you that is definitely beneficial, but it's just, you know, your insurance isn't going to cover it. If you have the cash, you can pay for it.

Yeah, that's kind of the situation I was in where it's like nobody was going to pay for it, but if you want to roll the dice and i rolled the dice and i gotta say but you do you think that if the initial treatments that you had the first couple that you really had good responses from if you just stopped there you'd have a different opinion of it i don't know that's the thing is if i just did it once it kind of felt like you ever do acid yes you know that like ping that like super clear feeling you get that's how i felt the day i saw you i did acid for the first time like i was i want to say four months ago oh wow five months ago that's great what'd you think loved it yeah you didn't find it too intense no okay because

it can be speedy as fuck i'm so used to edibles and float tanks yeah that i think it's uh it's very introspective it was very clean like the i the idea behind it like the uh the the feeling behind it the thought process behind it i was like oh this is like it's a mind clarifier it's like like you know bill hicks used to call it a squeegee in your third eye like mushrooms that's it felt it felt very clarifying, if that makes any sense. Yeah, it makes total sense. I felt great. I felt really good. I felt really friendly.

During? Yeah, man. Like real happy. You must have had good stuff because a lot of times it can be speedy and it ends up feeling like mushrooms and I think maybe meth. Oh, combined. Yeah. So you end up with this just like intense fucking...

It's not the goddamn problem is that it's illegal. Okay. So you're getting weird versions of it. Here's the doctor putting the IV in my arm. Okay. Oh, Jesus. Can I see it? Yeah.

Oh, Christ. Did you take this with a 1980s phone? No, that's just the way it's saved or whatever. Why is it saved so little? I don't know. This is bizarre. Did you blow it up? Okay.

No, I can't. All right. So this doctor is sticking this. He looked like Bob Shapiro, OJ's counsel, OJ's lead counsel. He can clip the thingy upper corner um so he just you just go into a regular doctor's office and just sticks this thing sticks a thing in your arm and off you go now the doctor has he tried it himself uh he would not say but it was he said it with a wink that he had he was like i won't comment either way on whether

i've done it myself yeah all those guys they wanted to keep it on the sneak tip yeah but clearly he had and so yeah so i would say for for the first session was amazing that's when i saw you and then after that it got a little dicey now what does it feel like when you're in it i was in a it felt like i was in a pod a pod in like a small it's a small world after all like pod i'm going into the pod now crossing my arms and i would like a little boat just going along through rooms and the rooms i would say were designed like kind of a bit like uh what's the uh clockwork orange but like the the milk bar thing a bit like white walls white breathing walls breathing yeah breathing i'd say they were breathing yeah they were inhaling and exhaling and but i was never freaked out um and then there was like kind of digits on it like the matrix it had like a green

hue to it um my biggest worry when i was in it was like i'm so out of it if there's an earthquake i'm fucked like i and then i would get like wide shots of california i would get like wide shots of california and think about like the hospital crumbling and then i'm me trying to get out and going like i can't go man you're not gonna have to go without me give me 40 minutes and i'll catch up to you guys uh so that was my biggest worry but for the most part it was just like a fairly pleasant i just couldn't get over the fact that this was happening in a doctor's office right just like a regular ass fucking doctor like literally waiting room with other physicians and their patients old weirdos shitty magazines and then you go in and you trip your fucking head off

and so you're sitting in like a regular chair You're sitting It's a reclinable bed Like a craftmatic type thing Oh yeah it's real nice They spared no expense So you're sitting in this craftmatic adjustable bed You get the needle in the arm And they leave it in there for how long? 40 minutes

40 minutes Now if an earthquake happened Could you just pull the needle out of your arm? I was so out of it I don't think I could have. I think once the drip happened, like it's in you for a while. So once the drip happens, you probably have however long. I mean, it's a 40-minute trip apparently, but I don't know if it's based on one.

I don't know how much is going in at once. Now, that stuff, ketamine is weird because it was a tranquilizer, right? For animals, a veterinary yeah it's exactly that's it's a it's a horse tranquilizer and they use it as an anesthesia for humans yeah i've heard of that the guy was an anesthesiologist he was yeah don't they use that in wartime because it's easy to carry around i believe they have in wartime because you can use very small amounts and it puts people under. You know what that sounds like?

That sounds like a Joe Rogan fact. Yeah. I don't know for sure, but it sounds like yes. I think I'm pretty sure that's the case. I'm pretty sure I was listening to a podcast where they're talking about various forms of anesthesia and sort of the evolution of using anesthesia. of anesthesia and sort of the evolution of using anesthesia and that ketamine worked really good in the field because you could have a very small amount and you would you know put someone under pretty deeply yeah i don't know what if it's local do you know what i mean like i don't know if you could have done surgery it wasn't like i couldn't feel myself right right it was more like i had no

interest in it what do you got here following fda approval in 1970, what is that? Anesthesia was first given to American soldiers during the Vietnam War. Oh, there you go. Yeah, there's a lot of shit on Reddit about it as an antidepressant, as a treatment for depression. So for you, you heard about this how? I don't know. I want to say if you just Google depression treatments. So you just were Googling?

It's probably page two. Or alternative depression treatments is probably what I Googled. Now, we've had these conversations before, you and I, about depression and different treatments. How much exercise do you do? Did we talk about this before? Yeah, a decent amount. I run probably three, four days a week. That's pretty nice. Yeah. That's supposed to be one of the best things for depressions. Yeah. Cardio.

But like I've never gotten a runner's high if that makes sense. Really? I think I have a shortage of dopamine in my brain. Just naturally. Like I just think I don't have a ton of dopamine. Like I don't, joy is not a thing I think I've ever experienced. What? I repeat, joy is a thing that I don't think I've ever experienced.

I'll experience adrenaline rushes and, like, ego, but I'll never be truly, like, joyous. Yeah. It stinks. It fucking stinks. Because it's something I believe in. I just don't. I've accomplished things. I've done, you know what I mean?

I believe in I just don't I've accomplished things I've done you know what I mean but I never get this sense of like this real You know in very small doses Extremely like micro doses so like let me put into perspective like career-wise like yeah You had a nice Comedy Central special put a lot of hype behind it. You did I watched he did really well great response How'd you feel when all that was over? I felt cool. Cool. Do you know what I mean?

Like, I felt like, yeah, exactly. Like, all right, good shit, man. Keep going. See what else. Yeah. But I was never like, during Chappelle's show, I never got like a, I'm the king of the world. You know what I mean? Right. I was never that sort of like huge, you know, something that would make you want to scream you feel so good right do you get that much all day

24-7 I just hold it and try not to scream If you want to take a break You want to go up on the roof? I'm the worst guy to talk to this about because I don't really I don't really get depressed I've been depressed before but to answer my question the joint question. I'm joyful all the time Are you really so that wasn't a joke you really I'm pretty happy. That's great my question, the joy question. I'm joyful all the time. Are you really? So that wasn't a joke. You really are.

No, I'm pretty happy. That's great. Here's the good news. You seem happy. Yeah. Like I buy it. I'm not like, Joe Rogan thinks he's happy. You seem happy.

I have a lot of friends. Yeah. Like that's a big part of it, you know? Yeah. A lot of cool friends. I love having a family. Love what I do. Yeah.

Like my jobs. Yeah. My day is filled with stuff I enjoy doing. Yeah. I love having a family love what I do like my jobs my day is filled with stuff I enjoy doing you know I mean it's just fucking

I'm just lucky super lucky but I have many of the same things yeah I just don't feel that

that sense of satisfaction you have now has it varied have you had higher and lower feelings of satisfaction? Yeah, I think when I'm working a lot, I feel pretty satisfied. Oh, okay. Okay. So accomplishments

or task and goal oriented. Yeah. Like I like, it's satisfying to do a special or direct a commercial or write a TV show or, you know. Well, I'll tell you one thing. I say I'm filled with joy and I'm happy all the time. When I'm not working or I'm not accomplishing anything or I'm not doing, like, if I get like real lazy, I can get depressed. Somebody else told me that. They said that a very, very joyous guy told me when he gets injured, he just, that takes it out of him.

It can. I've been injured a gang of times. I've had a bunch of surgeries from um you know athletic injuries but um but for me uh if i go into lulls like if i'm not accomplishing things or in the past i don't allow myself to get into those anymore because it's just not a good feeling and even it doesn't even necessarily have to be like a career like oriented thing but i have to have things that i'm enjoying yeah it could just be like i'm really into doing yoga so i'm doing yoga every day and i it's i do it i get it done and i feel great and yeah but if i'm

not doing something i my brain for whatever reason needs tasks it needs stuff to do It needs stuff to do. It needs stuff to figure out. It needs like puzzles. Yeah. If I don't get that, I have a real issue. Yeah. Agreed. Do you like big long-term goals? Yes. It's just like, yeah, you do.

Yeah. I like things that are hard. I tend to like micro things. I like those too. I like things that are due in like a week as opposed to something that's like, yeah, whenever you're, like I'm outlining a movie right now and I'm like, i don't i wish it were more like bang bang yeah like i'm meeting about it tomorrow like specifically to so to like kind of focus myself like you write a joke and then you go up do it tonight and it kills yeah yeah oh that's okay that's something that that's joy that's

pretty damn near joy yeah killing or just writing a just writing a joke? Writing a joke and it kills. It's like... That feeling, man. Don't you wish you could give that to people who don't do stand-up? Yep. I sure do. I mean, it's just like... It's it. I've had this conversation with people before that don't do stand-up and I'm like, man, I wish I could tell you what it's like to crush in front of 5,000 people. It's like finding $100,000.

Do you know what I mean? Yeah. That's how it feels. It feels like, oh, I just found $100,000, and you know what led me there? My personality and my experience. And your work ethic. And your work ethic.

That's exactly right. That's a big part of it. And so it's like you feel like, oh, this is so, it's so personal. Yeah. It feels like this could only, if it's a good joke, only you could have written it, you know? Well, even if other people could have written it, you wrote it. Like this, this thing came out of the sky. Out of your. It chose you.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, it chose you. Yeah. Whatever it is. So that I, that I will say is like, that's, that's a sense of euphoria. But I think in some ways I try to kind of contain it a little bit in that where I'm like, whoa. You know what I mean? Like with this thing, I don't know what to do with this feeling.

Because it's the kind of thing where you just want to like go up and kiss women. Like, hey, foot of theirs. And smack people on the ass. And like, I just fucking wrote a fucking closer. What the fuck did you? you know what I mean? Like, you just feel like a musical. Tony Henscliff had this new joke and he did it. And he came off stage, like right after he did it.

And he was literally like fist pumping. Like, you know, he was just so fired up because it killed. He was so fired up. It's like, he he was charged with electricity. Yeah. That's nice when you can allow yourself to just like, yeah. And you can do it in a way that no one gets jealous or feels like you're preening.

You got to hang out with better people. No, I don't. But we're hanging out with basically the same people. Yeah, but I'm saying if that's the problem. Yeah. And we've all been there before, too. Like where things are going well and you're hanging around with someone and they get super weird and creepy with you and they withdraw and like oh yeah yeah what do you yeah what do you just kind of like what do you want me to do

you want me to fail well there's people that do definitely want you to fail but what they definitely don't want you to do is highlight the fact that they're not succeeding well yeah but that's what most people consider a lot of people consider your success they'll their but that's what most people consider. A lot of people consider your success their failure. Yeah, that's such a bizarre way of looking at it. I know. It's so common, though. What evolutionary benefit does that have? Well, finite resources.

Yeah. I think that's what it comes from. I think it just comes from their, you know, when people go, ah, there's enough jobs for everyone? You and I both know, no, there's not. Nope. There's not. There's enough jobs for everyone? You and I both know, no, there's not. Nope. There's not. There's enough jobs for talented people, but if you don't feel like you're talented, then you are fucking panicked all the time. And then it's a self-fulfilling prophecy because that sort of famine thinking is really bad for progress.

really bad for progress yeah if you're a person who's really worried about other people getting things and you start thinking in a jealous manner about other people's success that fucks up your own ability to express yourself yeah and that fucks up your ability to succeed it depends on how it hits you it can it can be a motivator i believe sure definitely uh where you're like fucking he got it you know i can't get whatever that is. But it's hard to, you got to kind of wrestle it into a positive way. Because if you get upset that somebody else got something, then usually it's a bitter motivator and it doesn't lend itself to success. But I've never, I don't think I've ever had something where I was like, that should have been mine. Do you know what I mean? Like one, have you ever had that?

Where it was like a job that you were like. Definitely when I was younger, that should have been mine. Do you know what I mean? Like one, have you ever had that? Where it was like a job that you were like. Definitely when I was younger, for sure. What sorts of things were they? I'm sure looking back, they're absurd. Yeah, absurd. Things that I didn't deserve, you know, like someone else getting a television show or someone else headlining a certain place.

And for comics, there really is not, it's not a finite situation. It's not like there's a limited amount of resources. There's so many different clubs and there's so many different topics and there's so many different jobs. I mean, I think that's one of the reasons why comics are so ruthless when it comes to plagiarism. Because like, say, if you have a really unique idea and this idea has come to you from the universe and you're sketching it out and putting it together and some fucker comes in and sees this and says ah i can i can i've started looking at jokes as inventions and it's like you stole my fucking invention that's my invention dude like i don't my inventions are word inventions or i did premise inventions or

whatever like so it's intellectual property. Yeah. Like, you know that that's mine. Mm-hmm. So to steal it is worse than plagiarism. It's like copyright infringement. It's like- It's both.

Yeah. It's like, it's unforgivable. It also cuts in and creates that weird competitive finite resources mentality it creates it it creates like a mind fuck yeah because then all sudden you start thinking like oh well this is this is not like a community of like-minded people they're supporting each other there's like some parasites in here and there's some just some vampires it's people with different standards because we all more or less have i don't know if it's learned in the comedy community or we all come into it with certain standards.

But there is that thing of like, there's an acceptable, you know what I mean? It's almost like not closing with a super dirty joke if the person after you isn't a dirty comic. You know what I mean? Especially if you care about them. Yeah, exactly. There's certain unwritten rules that you wonder like... Commodity.

Yes. That you don't want to fuck people over. And then when somebody else does some shit like that, you're like, wait a minute. But the way I've thought of it, it's like, well, let's write another one. I mean, obviously it's the worst and it's unforgivable, but I've had people steal shit from me.

Yeah, it's going to happen. But it fucks up the best part about stand-up. Like last night at the store, I was hanging around with Stan Hope and Michael Costa and all these guys. And we're just laughing and hanging around. There's a cool camaraderie. Costa's been great lately. Michael Costa's been like hit astride. The kind of jokes he's writing are fucking great.

Very funny guy. And really nice guy, too. Yeah, hilarious. Like such a sweet guy. Yeah. But that place is filled with that kind of jokes. He's writing are fucking great very funny guy and really nice guy. Yeah, like such a sweet guy Yeah, but that place is filled with that kind of cool camaraderie. That's the point to me Yeah, do you know what I mean? Like that's really like the fun of it Yeah like like what you've done with like your people and and other comics and like you like your

group of the deaths whatever you want to call it but like But but that's the point of like that's my favorite part of it and it's there's no close second it's not money it's not it's literally like a vibe and it's connecting with somebody yeah i agree it's all hugs you know you go to the store on any given night it's all hugs it's all a bunch of guys that appreciate each other and girls, you know, people who are really funny, get together. And that place right now, it's hotter than it's ever been. Last night, Tuesday night, sold out. Just packed.

Main room, original room, and belly room. Packed. Yeah. It's crazy. And by the way, it should be. Yeah. The shows are fucking bananas. Yeah.

The shows at this comedy store are fundraisers anywhere else in the world yeah yeah but here it's just like yeah ron white joey diaz duncan trussell rg fear i mean it's fucking crazy the lineups bang bang bang yeah you just see killer after killer ian edwards like holy shit yeah jessel nick yeah oh my god all the time it's it's the the lineups are amazing but it's also like the feel like you feel, man, I think we are in a golden era. Yeah. It feels like, wow, we're really lucky to be here right now. Yeah.

Yeah. I mean, yeah. There are guys like you that almost created it in a way by going back to the store and by validating it, and then your fans go, and then it's a self-fulfilling thing. But yeah, it definitely feels like, I don't know what, I feel i feel like although did you watch the roast the roast battle yeah i thought it was fucking great i didn't watch on comedy central oh no watch i was in part of it i think was my in montreal no i was in the part that was in the belly room where they filmed they did a special that i didn't watch there's a five there's the five parts that they did from montreal and i heard

it was really great it was great like the main yeah Ralphie I thought I heard he took a beating he got yeah he saw us but again this is all around career flash in front of his eyes but what do you expect when you're doing a row it's like I know if I do a roast people are gonna fucking kill me on Chappelle right repeatedly right of Right, of course So now I'm just like Alright, let's judge this level of how hard you're gonna hit me Yeah So, Ralphie got hit on a weight joke Which is like

Weight in his divorce His family Yeah, yeah, yeah Oh, right That's hardcore Yeah Family, like, left him Yeah

So he's alone Yeah He's fat Yeah Depressed Yeah And then someone just kept teeing off on him. Who was he roasting?

Was it Mike Lawrence? Mike Lawrence, who won, is really funny. Yeah. He's a really funny dude. But apparently, Ralphie just didn't take it so well. Yeah. Well, I'm happy he didn't take a swing at him. Was it that close?

It was like, you know, it had that, even on TV, it was that feeling of like, oh, I could see this going a certain way. Fuck, man. I don't want to do that. I don't want to say that to people. I don't want to say anything that's going to make somebody, I definitely don't want anybody saying that to me. It's going to make me feel like that. What's funny is there's a zoom in on Ralphie's face. And as you're watching it, you're like, did they zoom in or did I zoom in?

Like, wait a minute. Did I imagine that zoom in or did they do that? Oh, Christ. That is a goddamn brutal show. Yeah. But good for comedy, man. Really good for comedy. Yeah, it's a good format.

It's a cool format. They figured out a new format. Great joke writer format. Yeah. It's fair. It's literally just head a new format and great joke writer format. Yeah, it's like it's fair It's like literally just like head-to-head and it rewards good. They laugh at the it's like when it's like a Madison Square Garden they say people know basketball there like NBA players say people know basketball like they know That's how it feels at the roast battle like people know comedy and they reward high

High level of difficulty jokes yes i i agree and also i think one of the things that roast battle is really good for comedy is it's pushing the boundaries of acceptable jokes yeah and this is a weird time where people are fucking you know this whole idea about punching up and yeah there's there's so much horseshit involved in like what is and is not acceptable and stand up today yeah and it's it's a bunch of people that are trying to control behavior and thinking right and that just doesn't fly in that world it's the pushback like what bros battle is is the pushback to this PC era that we're in right now if they could prove to me that joking leads to action, I would pay more attention.

Do you know what I mean? But it doesn't. I know. But if they could say, yeah, Hitler made a lot of jokes about invading Austria. He used to do tons of bits about Austria. And then eventually he brought the hammer down. Like, if you could prove some sort of some sort of you know the a and b a a plus b equals c then yeah then it's like okay i agree but you also know that that racism and all

that shit is like it ain't about joking it's about like a it's about a lot of times it's about poverty it's the class it's so many other things that aren't necessarily comedy. Yeah, and even a poverty of ideas. I mean, it's a thought process poverty. It's poor thinking. Yes, yeah. I mean, that's what racism really is. And what jokes are is like you know that there's a certain amount of racism and you play on it and there's a wink as you're doing it in a joke form

and there's some racist shit that people can say to each other in that joke battle or the roast battle. That is fucking hilarious. Yes. Yeah. There were black people can't swim. I mean, there were nine 11 off the,

out the fuck and tons of nine 11 jokes. George Perez and Sarah Tiana were roasting and Sarah Tiana was roasting him about Sarah Tiana is insanely good at that shit. She's amazing. She's like one of those things where it's like someone can talk real fast or something where you're like, I didn't even know you could do this shit. Like she's like double jointed or something. Like, wait, what?

Sarah, you can do the splits? All right. It comes off even crazier because she's so sweet. Yeah. And she's got this smiling, pretty face. Which I believe. Yes. Do you know what I mean?

Like there is no hatred in her roast. No. No. But she knows where the soft spots are. Yeah. And that's where she sticks the blade. Yeah. And dude, she came in second.

She almost won. She just kind of ran out of steam. Like, she just ran. It was, they did write a lot of jokes. Oh, yeah, man. It's brutal. So, yeah. But she, Sarah, congrats to Sarah.

I don't know. So, Hinchcliffe did it with a suit of armor on? Yes. And would have won, but fucked up his last joke, maybe. It was really close. And his last joke was a clanker. I think his first joke and his last joke. But Hinchcliffe's good at that shit, too.

Oh, he's really good at it. Hinchcliffe is mean. that shit too oh he's really good at it Hinchcliffe is mean he knows yeah he knows how to certain guys you can tell he means what he said he's up there he's doing a documentary he's not he's doing a documentary about his thoughts it's not a lot of like there's art to it but it's like oh this is all based on a true story yeah well I'm just happy that Comedy Central is taking, that's a big chance. And they've taken quite a few big chances recently. Like, I think with Ari Shafir's show, This Is Not Happening, that was a big chance. Yeah, I agree.

And that show is really racy, really out there. Some of the stories are fucking completely outrageous. Yeah. So they've got that. And then they're taking chances with this as well. And it's off the beaten path This is a new thing there. This is not like another guy's doing a talk show. Oh great I think they're following the sort of what's working live. Yes, and smartly going. How do we televise it?

Mm-hmm because the truth about Comedy Central is the ratings are so Bad at this point that, relative to what they were, that I think they're like, it's Kent Alterman just going like, I like that. Let's do that. Right. And leaving shows on that are not particularly highly rated because he likes it. If they do that, though, I think that's the right way to go. If they just find what people actually enjoy.

Like, L.A. right now has a comedy scene, a big comedy scene. And Roast Battle is one of the highlights of the comedy scene. Everybody goes to see it, man. Last night there's a fucking line. Like Roast Battle started at midnight. Yeah. I got there at 10 and the line was already around the fucking outside of the patio of the store. Yeah.

All waiting to get in. Yeah. Because I think people didn't know about it until like this week literally the TV show the show Yeah, that definitely an impact, but it's it's cool to see it's cool. It's great. It's fair. Yeah, that's what it is It's like okay This is fucking there's a little goddamn justice right here like a funny thing that people were doing live And I think like famous people judges helps, but like for the most part It's just it's funny to watch it's fun

to watch these people go head to head i heard that whoopi goldberg was awful uh she was just like why are you making that face yeah i would agree she uh whoopi was never like a comic do you know what i mean well whoopi was a comic but it wasn't really real. Not like a club comic. She did it. Yeah, but to me, she did that one-woman show, which was in a theater, was not stand-up, and then she did Comic Relief, where she was doing a monologue with two other dudes. I'm pretty sure she did comedy clubs, too. Okay, maybe.

I'm pretty sure I saw her. Sometimes, Joe, things pass you by. And certain shit, it's like you kind of well when she was going back and forth with jessalyn neck and she said i have oscars yeah she's like all the shit i got and jessalyn was like a bunch of shit from the 80s which is like well that doesn't make you funny either oh exactly exactly it's like yeah you brought a you brought a you brought a an os Oscar to a comedy show It's not only that it's the opposite of being funny like talking about your Accomplishments is the the opposite of like a good comeback

Yeah, like somebody somebody said that they were an argument with somebody and the person goes I have a million dollars Like okay buy your way out of this fucking conversation Well if someone calls you a loser You fucking loser And you're like well I'm actually one Yeah there are no I'm not saying you should never bring up having a million dollars Like if someone says you broke bitch You broke motherfucker

Yeah you can't be like I actually have a lot of money So you can't say that Yeah there are certain things in which I've succeeded So yeah But the source been It's fucking it's cool It's magical again money yeah um can't say that yeah there are certain things in which i've succeeded um so yeah so you know but the source been it's it's fucking it's cool it's magical again yeah well not even that again like i've been there on and off for 20 plus years it's never been as good as it is now no and it's because it's the right way it's adam's booking good people he's not booking

he's not booking like viruses do you know what i mean he's not booking people that when you're on the show with him you're like how the fuck am i only getting two spots or how am i only getting four spots and this guy's getting whatever like right where you see a guy that just kind of is a bummer comedically like that has no merit right that has no merit whatsoever comedically they used to have that because i think there was just a lot of people left over from like the 80s yeah there was there was some weird like a lot of legacy acts yeah that's a good way to put it yeah yeah but now there's like there's young people coming up that are really funny there's guys like Ron white who really established who love hanging out there

now right there all the time yeah and it's cool he's like a part of the community now yeah you're there a lot burrs there all the time now. And it's cool. He's like a part of the community now. Yeah. You're there a lot. Burr's there a lot. Jesselnick's there a lot. Dave when he's in town. Yeah, Chappelle, Louie.

And that back bar too. God damn, we were at the back bar last night. And I'm like, how fun is this place? It just makes you feel like tingly when you're there. Yeah, you do. It feels like you're in a movie about this time. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's fucking awesome, man.

It's awesome. Yeah, so I did that. So the ketamine, I will say, I cannot recommend. But you recommended for one session? Look, ketamine as a drug is interesting as fuck. The thing that I felt the day i saw you may have just been that that lsd hangover like feeling that hangover of like the where you're not hung over but you're not yourself you feel like that that like high-pitched clarity right

um that like squeak uh so i can't but beyond it just became, now I complained to the guy and he said, you're the only person that's ever felt like this. The foggyness? Yeah. And a little nausea as well. How great are those balls? They're awesome. Yeah.

Amazing. This is a WOD workout of the day, I think they call it. WOD supernova. This is the tiny one. This is the little one. The big one is actually even better. Yeah. But you stick it on your back when you're sitting down.

Oh, yeah. You can use it on your head ever? No. On my head? Dude, you got shit in your head. You got muscles in your head you don't even know. Bro, you got muscles you don't even know about, bro. Bro, my head is yoked.

Bro, everybody knows that about you. My fucking head is ripped, bro. I bet you have weird shit up there. So yeah, so I did the ketamine. Can't recommend it. Then I tried something called TMS, which is short for transcranial magnetic stimulation. Joe, I've got a video, and it's going to be full frame. Whoa.

Send it to Jamie. He'll put it up on the big screen. Oh, yeah. How do I send it? Yeah, that's probably the best way. Oh, okay. Hold on. So, I've been really interested in this

idea of stimulation on the outside of your brain. I have to listen to a Radiolab podcast called 9-Volt Nirvana. Is that the memory one? one no it's one where they're talking about skill acquisition okay yeah that's what i mean they with the sharpshooter yes yes yes this is too big to send to you oh can we uh but if you send it through google it'll go to google drive and upload to him with the password all right all right. Guy's got a muscly head. Yo, my fucking head.

He knows things. My head is power lifting. I remember when I was a kid, they did this cat scan on marvelous Marvin Hagler. Marvin Hagler, who was one of the greatest boxers of all time. Sure. Had very large muscles around his temples. Like extraordinarily large, like not just a little bit bigger than everybody else's, but like two or three times larger than the average person.

Like essentially, you can see he had veins. Yeah, he had like thick veins that I remember. Yeah, he had headgear. He essentially had muscle headgear around his temples, like in the side of his head. they were like what in the fuck and they didn't know if this was something that was developed from years of biting down on a mouthpiece and there's a lot of guys that did a bunch of different uh exercises for their jaw itself like i remember jerry cooney had a thing that he put in his mouth it was like a uh like a thick rubber cable that had like electrical tape wrapped around it and he would bite down on it And he would like what's funny about his jaw is that shit doesn't make you fear the guy a little bit more like he'll use

fucking tape bro He don't give a fuck All right, let me so guys would they were actually lifting weights with their jaw bro um all right let me so guys would they were actually lifting weights with their jaw which makes sense i mean you could power lift with your jaw some guys chewed gum too there was another thing they would do they'd get like a stack of bazooka like that that bubble gum that turns into cement after you chew it for a couple minutes and they just take that shit and um which totally makes sense because if your jaw is loose and weak and if you look at guys with big jaws like a guy like a mark hunt or something that's another thing rub the ball

on your jaw yeah you're gonna fucking you're not gonna believe how strong you how like rough and like i have a knot in my jaw right now suck a lot of cock just for a little ton but enough enough to get by you gotta do what you gotta do you know what i mean i gotta i want spots whenever i get a massage and then they work your head i get so excited i'm like yeah i rub my head it feels so good my daughter was rubbing my head the other day she's like does this feel good i said actually that feels really good yeah and you immediately become an eight-year-old boy. What are you doing? Oh, that's my head. It feels so good to rub

my head. Yeah, it feels good. It's an area, like your feet. It feels good to get your feet rubbed. It feels good to get your hands rubbed. You ever get your hands massaged? You would think, that hand's not going to feel good. Like you shake someone's hand, it doesn't feel anything.

But if someone like rubs your hand, they start pulling your fingers and make them pop and stuff. And they massage your palms and the tips of your fingers and all the little connective muscles and all the tissue in between the fingers. It feels great. Yeah. I need to get a massage. I haven't gotten a massage in forever. Really? You strike me as a guy that would get a massage three days a week. I used to get them all the time.

It's just been too busy. It's been a month at least. Yeah. Maybe more. Maybe two months. I used to get them all the time. But I get them. I get a guy who does a lot of rolfing.

He uses a metal bar on me. He takes it into my muscle. My nose. Yeah. What? That's what rolfing. Apparently, they go up your sinuses. No. I've never seen it. Bro, they go up your sinuses no i've never

seen it bro they fuck with your brain yo bro they massage your fucking brain bro bro i'm saying uh yeah you can rolfing they're supposed to go all that shit whoa your sinuses yeah all right coming in coming nervous um yeah so this this tms thing transcranial magnetic stimulation, covered by Blue Cross. Huh. Yeah. Ooh. So, yeah, that's what, like, it was really, really good. Like, I, for a lot of my life, I felt like I had a, all right, I had, like, a thing,

like, it almost felt like a metal weight, like a bit of, like, like five pound weight on my upper left forehead my left and then so i went to this whoa dude that sound is like an mri sound yeah that's what it is it is yes it's basically the same exact magnet as an mri but it's just they do your head yeah they put it on your head it's pretty simple simple. The first time they measure it, they have to get to the exact spot. There's another video where my finger is pulsing that you'll enjoy. And what is it doing to you? What's the benefit? It's basically magnetizing and electrifying.

It's waking up, basically, dead synapses, according to them. Really? Yeah. So it's waking up dead synapses, according to them. Really? Yeah. So it's waking up dead synapses. Waking them up. So they're dormant? That's what they say. You don't even look into it.

You're like, go ahead, shoot me out. Yeah, what is it? Can I do ketamine and this at the same time? I don't have kids, man. So I'm like, yeah, I don't give a shit. Whatever it's going to cost me, I'm happy to do it. If you had kids, you think you wouldn't do it? I think if I had kids, I'd be sort of more cautious about it.

Really? Yeah, probably, because I'm not reckless, but I'm not like... It's also vague anyway, the research. It's also like, we think it does this. Most antidepressants, they know, they think they know what's happening. They don't actually know. Yeah, that's a weird one. Yeah.

When you think about how many people are prescribed these things, and then there's not really a direct understanding of how it impacts each person. Like, they'll tell you, hey, we'll try this medication. And if it doesn't work, we'll try another one. Yeah. Does this one work for you? We'll just cycle through it. And how do you know if it's working for you or if you're having a good time in your life and so you're feeling better because maybe you started a new relationship and a new job

and it's going well and, hey, it just, everything seems pretty good. Dude, I was on medications that made me nauseous for a year and a half before I was like you know what I? Literally thought I was nauseous because I was eating too many lifesavers Not even fucking kidding literally I was like I gotta take it easy on these Lifesavers because every night I throw up on the way to the laugh factory And then I realized like you know Neil you're taking a pretty high dosage of zoloft you might want to just take it down a notch that zoloft stuff is supposed to be really weird for your discerning of what matters and what doesn't matter like like it's hard to that i've

never done it so it's it's hard for me to describe it but yeah the people that i've talked to that have done it said one of the issues that they had with it is nothing had the bad things didn't feel bad anymore but the good things didn't feel good either well that's the thing with a lot of antidepressants is they they raise the the floor and they also lower the ceiling so that it it narrows your band of experience basically which but if you're severely depressed, it can be very... Like ketamine, apparently, is a lifesaver, truly, for... They may start administering it in emergency rooms for suicide cases. Really?

Yeah, because it does... I mean, it's basically a hallucinogen. So, you know hallucinogens will make you like, see things differently. So they're starting to, at least they're talking about administering it as a sort of almost like, whatever that drug is that you can do,

almost like an EpiPen for- For suicide victims or suicide- Thought thinkers. Thinkers. Yeah, about to do it. for suicide victims or suicide thinkers. About to do it. So the TMS, transgranular magnetic stimulation, half an hour of that doesn't feel

like much. Feels like a shitty woodpecker. Like a fucking sleepy woodpecker is sort of going at your head but you're not like hey get out of here well you're just kind of like okay okay how much longer and you i would just sit there and watch tv um and how many times you're supposed to do it i you do it 40 times four zero four zero times half an hour and how deep are you in right now i'm done i I finished it. You did all 40? Yeah, I did all 40 in the fall. Wow. And

I'm telling you, it lasted. And you can go back for sort of pick-me-ups whenever you feel like you need it. So I'm telling you, this is the thing that has worked best for me. Better than ketamine?

Way better. Better than Zoloft. Really? I was on what's an SSRI A strategic Selective serotonin reuptake inhibitor And Went off it Once I did this magnet shit So you're off everything

Wow and you feel great Just no joy Well no joy If you never had it you didn't lose nothing. I just look at you. You kids have fun. I'll be over here with no joy. Yeah, but I'm not miserable.

And I'm not also, there's no physical manifestation. That's the biggest thing. The head thing, the feeling like there was a plate on my head, getting rid of that was really, really, really great. So when you say like a plate on your head like there was a pressure or yeah I have a little weight a little weight and a little pressure did you know something in there no because there were times where I'd go off of antidepressants and I'd have my jaw muscles and muscles in my temple would be so tight that I'd need to use

like a massager well on them so I knew that there was all I was all sort of connected yeah you do ding on is that was yeah pretty sure is that my ding unless it's me my name is a man bro why don't me bro yep yes your ding so so Yep. Yeah, it was your thing. Fuck, I dare you. So that was a big one. That was really helpful. Then I did, I was in New York for a couple months, did that show Three Mics, which I think I talked to the premise. Yeah, you told me, but say it on here. So the premise is, on stage, I put three mics, equidistant, apart from each other. One is for stand up.

One is for one liners that I just couldn't fit anywhere. And then one is for true sort of emotional confession type shit. Talking about depression, talking about shit with my dad, like the sort of, I won't spoil the surprise surprise but pretty heavy shit between me and my dad when he died or right before he died and and then the and then the second monologue is about um kind of about like celebrity and and and dealing with with having a partner and then breaking up and becoming my own guy and all that shit um So it's basically like it ends up being probably 40 minutes of stand-up, 45 of stand-up and a half hour of true stories and then five minutes of one-liners.

And did you do it after you had completed your treatment? I did it, yes. I did it after, yeah. And in the middle of it, I actually stopped taking everything. In the middle of recording or practicing? In the middle of, no, in the middle of the run. I stopped taking everything. In the middle of recording or practicing? No, in the middle of the run. I had an eight-week run, I think, in New York, and I stopped everything in the middle of it.

Not suddenly, just like, I don't think I need it. Wow. Yeah. Now, what's the difference when you get off medication? What was the difference in the way your brain was functioning? I can almost tell how well my brain's functioning. If I'm not depressed or not slowed down by depression, my associations are much quicker. Like, if you're just, like, the simplest thing of, like, that guy looks like so-and-so.

Like, sort of a little roast. Like, a little, like, what does that shirt fucking look like? The kind of shirt you... Like, if I i'm not depressed i can think of those quickly uh if i'm depressed there are times where i'd get depression would affect my memory where i couldn't remember the the the the test i would always do in my head is there's a guy who directed gone with the wind and the wizard of oz back-to-back? Jesus yeah, and I would try to remember his name his name is Victor Fleming, but if I was depressed I couldn't remember it like it affects your fucking Do you think it's a resource thing like your brain is so?

Concentrating on the depression and feeling like shit that just it doesn't have the resources I think it I I tend to think it's more a dead synapse thing. And I think it's an energy. I think depression is a lack of energy in the brain. And maybe you're right. Maybe it's all going to one place. But that's my own personal interpretation of it. Well, that makes sense in that way, in that definition, that aerobic exercise would benefit people that have depression.

Because they say that this particularly running and long form aerobic exercise, it does something to stimulate brain growth. Yeah. And brain function. They also say like if you want to remember something, there was a thing last week or two weeks ago about memory. Where if you want to, you should should study then exercise hmm and you'll you'll have a better memory that makes sense you'll remember the shit you had you you're you you uh studied for me there's nothing like physically writing something down with a pen like yeah i think there's something to that too for sure like where you see because it is like

two senses you're hearing it in your head it senses. You're hearing it in your head. It's three. You're hearing it in your head. You're seeing it with your eyes and you're actually physically forming the thoughts. Yeah. And I actually do say the words out too. When I write something down. Like a slave.

I actually say it. Like a slave. You write it down. You go like, and then, like an illiterate person. You'll be like, and then. A slave. I was like, how's it like a slave? A slave is actually a word I love to write.

Like, and then I went to the dark is that that's like no reading no writing you're trying to keep them from getting smart well I had the thought yesterday black people probably didn't wear eyeglasses until they didn't they weren't they couldn't there was no do you know what I mean like right nobody tested them certainly not bifocals yeah yeah they weren't being tested for vision uh yeah it's you think about it for a second and you you can only all you can do is do a loud exhale yeah we've been talking about perspective recently a lot it's come up a few times about how insane like yesterday we're talking about slavery we're talking about the confederate war uh the civil war rather than the confederate flag and we were talking about slavery. We were talking about the Confederate War, the Civil War, rather, and the Confederate flag. And we were just talking about how insane it is that slavery was 1865. It was abolished.

Like, that is, that's a week ago. Yeah. And you also think it ended immediately. It didn't fucking end immediately. No. It ended like, hey, see you're, hey, guys, we're going to, it's like at the club where they turn the lights on. There's still people, there's stragglers. There's people that don't want to leave. There was also, then it just shifted over to sharecropping, which was like, yeah, it's

subsistence farming. You're still going to live here. A lot of people were sharecroppers. I read a book called Some of My Best Friends Are Black, which seems ironic that I would read that book, but it's about integration. Ironic because some of your best friends are black. Yeah, ironic. But it's about integration. Ironic because some of your best friends are black. Yeah, ironic. But it's about integration, I should say.

And it's written by a guy named Tanner Colby. It's an insanely white name. It's about as white as it gets. It's literally off the charts. If you were going to build a white name, it would be Tanner Colby. He's always wearing a golf shirt. No, he might as well be. But he really went deep into

integration what was interesting was uh i highly recommend the book but he said you when you think about integration your resistance you go yeah white people didn't want it black people didn't want it either black people were like we don't want to hang out with those motherfuckers like these like black people didn't trust white people any more than white people trusted them like it was a mutual suspicion at least black people had a case white people had no case other than i think white people a lot of racism is basically uh white people fearing karmic retribution i think when i think fear of black people is like there's a karma coming at me. Like it's almost like too black.

And you think like, if they, if they did something to me, I kind of have it coming historically. So let me just kind of like these, even if you don't have it coming, they can make the argument. Yeah.

And it's not a long argument and it's a good argument. So, so that was interesting. And again, I think I've talked about it. Maybe I haven argument, and it's a good argument. So that was interesting. And again, I think I've talked about it. Maybe I haven't talked about it here. One of the biggest proponents of integration and ending redlining, you know about redlining? Redlining was a thing where banks would only give loans to people who lived. They would circle lines and maps.

They'd circle neighborhoods and go, if you live in that neighborhood, you can't get a loan. And guess whose neighborhoods they circled. Black people. So black people couldn't move. And the biggest, the guy who ended it was Mitt Romney's dad. Well, how about, yeah, well, how about Baltimore?

Where Baltimore, they had literal areas of the town where they would not sell to black people. Yeah, that's still, they can't, you can't where they would not sell to black people. Yeah. That's still, they can't, you can't, unless, what do you have, cash? You can't move. They literally can't fucking move. You could buy within that neighborhood, but you just, for the most part, couldn't get loans no matter what you did. And isn't it ironic that in a lot of those neighborhoods, the saving grace financially is white people gentrifying the

neighborhoods and making them like super rich again yeah that's the saving grace and that's saving grace for people that were lucky enough to buy right which has happened more that's happened a fairly good amount but it's not for the neighborhood yeah for the renters it's right it's pushed out yeah so it's like look you wanted the neighborhood to be worth something again yeah yeah but we can't afford it yeah and people are buying up these houses and redoing them and then selling them for shit loads of money well Bensonhurst which was always like this horrible neighborhood yeah Bensonhurst is like over that's going through this wave of gentrification all of Brooklyn's going through yeah like the entire borough is going through it except like the the poor the poor Italian neighborhoods are pretty much the same.

But yeah, like the whole- Bed-Stuy. Yeah. Bed-Stuy, Fort Greene. Yeah. Yeah, there's tons. Like Bensonhurst. And those are the ones that we always associated with like that deep Italian racism.

The Spike Lee racism. The baseball bat racism. Yeah, exactly. Spike, the racism. The baseball bat racism. Yeah, exactly. Spike, the wife beater baseball bat. Yeah. Real good Italian racism. Real Italian with sauce. Real nice and thick.

With the fucking ragu. The real stuff. Yeah. With man and goat. Did you ever do stand-up in those areas? I did stand-up in Bensonhurst once. No. Yeah, there was a gig out there. God, I'm trying to remember where it was.

But it was, I mean, I might as well have been in a Spike Lee movie. Yeah, I'm sure. Did they like you? I think at the time they did. Did you... It's hard to remember. Play it up. Not like you played it up, but did it feel like... Well, you could pass for Italian. Are you Italian? I am Italian. Oh, there you go. That's why pass for it i'm i've one quarter irish but most most of it is

italian yeah you seem italian like you look you look italian i mean that the nicest possible way joe well when i went to italy recently i was like okay now i see what's going on those are some talking motherfuckers oh yeah they talk up a storm But what was interesting is my driver, we got a cab, and the driver was fucking hilarious. And not intentionally. Hilarious in that this guy could not stop staring at women. He would, like, hit the brakes to look at them better. Oh, look at this. Oh, geez.

Catcalling was invented by Italian dudes, basically. They're pigs. I mean, in the most beautiful way. Like, it's kind of like hilarious that this guy i mean he's he knew he wasn't gonna get to fuck these women but in his mind like you had to slow down you gotta whistle head out the window hey look at this fucking girl with the fucking thing hey yeah yeah and they whistle and they hey mama but they're so they so stare they're staring at these women.

There's this framed poster that I have on my wall at home. It's an American girl in Italy. And all the dudes are whistling in the background. And they're grabbing their dicks. And it's like 1954. And I remember looking at that when I was a kid thinking, wow, this lady in this photo is probably like 100 years old now, right? Or dead. More likely dead but like these guys like this isn't this isn't like something they learned from watching the

sopranos like here it is this is the photo yeah oh no i know it well absolutely that guy grabbing his dick and look at the old man who's got his arms inside the jacket the jacket just thrown over his shoulders a couple guys sharing a uh a nice Vespa on the right side. The guy in the scooter. By the way, not the finest broad we've ever seen either. Well, it's hard to tell because she's got this look on her face like, Oh, my God. Yeah.

Oh, my God. Yeah, I guess. I guess it's all relative. Yeah, but it's just that it's a girl by herself walking past this cafe and all these pigs. There is this weird thing in their harassment, which is like a maternal respect to it. Do you know what I mean? It's like, you're beautiful like my mama. That's like built into it whereas american harassment doesn't

really have that whereas italian harassment there's a certain little fucking little maternal like hey mama my sweet mama because those guys there was a big thing a few years ago in 60 minutes where italian guys don't move out so they'll be in their mid-30s and their moms don't want to move out they don't want to move out they're like i don't i may not get married no one can compare it to mama this is italian guys in italy guys in italy yeah but that's always been an issue italian guys in the east coast too that live in america you think? No. Go on. Fuck that place.

Go on. No, no. Well, first of all, I can't speak Italian, and I don't have enough time. I mean, I just didn't. To learn, yeah. Not really interested. Did you like the lifestyle, though? I guess is my question. I loved being there.

I don't need to live somewhere to experience it for a week or so. I think we were there for eight days. It's beautiful, man. Like, we went to the malfi coast holy shit is that pretty yeah pretty and i think the vatican the vatican is a life-changing experience go on how could why do you say that it's immense oh it's hilarious first of all they have a 4 000 year old obelisk yeah in the center of the town yeah i mean you you look at some ofisk in the center of the town. I mean, you look at some of the artifacts and some of the stuff that they've collected there. There's so much shit there that it's just laying around.

Stuff that would be under two inch thick glass in America. You could walk up and touch it. Their new shit would be our oldest shit. It's amazing. Yeah. And it's amazing. There was a church, I remember, in Rome. I used to go there pretty often because I was dating a girl that lived there. It's amazing. Yeah. And it's amazing. There was a church, I remember in Rome, I used to go there pretty often because I was dating a girl

that lived there. That's a long distance relationship. Yeah, that sure is. It wasn't that serious, Joe. But no, I remember she- Do you use the word dating in air quotes? Yeah, I don't know how

And you thrust your hip when you say it. I knew a girl. I knew a girl. We were dating. Yeah. Eek, eek, eek. I knew a girl over in Rome

and no, she was just telling me, yeah, they have a piece of Jesus' cross. And it was believable. Do you know what I mean? I don't even think they made a big deal out of it. There weren't a ton of signs about it. That would be a huge attraction. That would be the number one attraction in in in certain states in america well there's a church in ethiopia that is purported to contain the lost ark of the covenant and they know what they know where the church and they have the ark of the covenant well this is what it's weird the the

people that guard this church they all have like cataracts and shit. And it's a very strange thing. This is all from Graham Hancock's book, where it's one of the first things that got him into this idea of like lost civilizations. And that the idea that people had come up with like some pretty high level of sophistication in their societies. But then the societies would crumble either due to natural disasters or war or whatever yeah and then they would they would have to sort of rebuild civilization but he was investigating this one church in Ethiopia where the people that guard this church in Ethiopia it's like a very specific sect and they won't allow anyone to get into the sacred secret

areas of it and the speculation was that somewhere inside that church is the lost Ark of the Covenant and that the reason why these people have cataracts and the reason why these people have all these issues like health issues it could possibly be that what's in that lost Ark of the Covenant is some sort of a toxic element, whether it's nuclear or whether it's chemical or whether it's... It would stand to reason if you watch the end of Raiders of the Lost Ark. That makes those guys' faces melt, right? It sure does.

I don't know what could be substantiated, if anything, about that. It makes your face melt unless you close your eyes, you know, like one of those things. Well, look, if someone came up with some sort of a nuclear reactor, you know, there was a kid that got arrested. I'm going to close my eyes if there's a nuclear blast and just hope for the best. That's a move. It's like when Bugs Bunny would jump out of an airplane right before it hit the ground. That's exactly right. But there was a kid that they found, I forget where he was, but he was building a nuclear

reactor in his fucking backyard. I want to say he was 17. Yeah. And someone found it somehow or another. They found it. They're like, what the fuck are you doing? Yeah. But if this kid can do that in 2016, the idea is if there was some sort of super highly

advanced lost civilization that had reached an incredible level of sophistication when it came to the ability to manipulate matter and possibly even come up with some sort of a reactor and that that was what the Ark of the Covenant was. That's why it was so sacred and fascinating because they realized it had immense power. But that power was probably like some sort of a small reactor that would be cool i hope wouldn't that be cool be crazy at all being true well they they know for sure that they've found batteries they found batteries in baghdad and i believe in some of the ancient egyptian sites that what it is is a very ancient sort of method of creating a battery. That's 100% confirmed.

That I believe. Yeah, that's confirmed. They know that they did come up with something and they figured out a way to use that battery. There it is right there. That's the Baghdad battery. Oh yeah, that makes sense. How old? That's old as fuck. I want to say it's at least 3 or 4 thousand years old. That's the Baghdad battery. Oh, yeah, that makes sense. Yeah. How old? That's old as fuck. Bad old, huh? I want to say it's at least 3,000 or 4,000 years old.

Find out how old that fucker is. Let's guess. I say it's 4,000 years old. 3,000. I'm going to go with 3. I'm going to go 2. 2? 2,000?

Hmm. Yeah. Huh. Yeah. Let's see. What does it say? No? Well, they must be able to carbon date it, right?

1930? They found it in the 1930s? Hmm. So does it say how old it is? That's all I want to know. Yeah. Speculation? What is it, speculation?

What is speculation? Some believe that it was, doesn't say age. Nothing. Supporting elements, battery, hypothesis. Nothing? See if you can find it. But see if you can find, actually, before you see if you can find that, see if you can find the thing about the guys who guard the Ark of the Covenant in Ethiopia.

Because apparently these monks that that guard it they all have fucked up eyes that was one of the things that graham hancock thought was like super disturbing when he started investigating it he's like why is he got why these guys have all cataracts and shit like what what's happening but if somebody can come up with a battery obviously there's a big step between a battery and some sort of a reactor but if this kid in his fucking backyard is building a reactor who knows you know they they had enough a high level of sophistication they had a high enough level of sophistication were they able to construct the pyramid right look at the great pyramid it's an incredible piece of engineering two million three hundred

thousand stones all cut so precisely you can't get a razor blade in between the rocks. I mean, especially if you look in the king's chamber. How high up at the pyramid do you think you needed to be to get pussy? Do you know what I mean? Like, is there stairs?

No, but I'm saying in terms of what you did, what your position was. Oh, that's another one. I'm on the pitch. I got an office on the eighth floor of the pyramid. Bitch, I'm on the point. I don't want to hear this.

My office is up at the point. Come up and have a cigar. No, but do you know what I mean? Like, if you worked on it, builders probably didn't. Although, I don't know how, what the, if jobs were considered a big deal back then. They used to think they were slaves. They don't think they're slaves anymore. They stopped thinking they were slaves about a decade ago i think when they they uncovered

some of the little camps that the people used to live in and by the food that they were eating and by the quality of the clothes and the plates they think they were skilled workers they don't think they were slaves and which makes sense because you're talking about something that if you two million three hundred thousand stones i think the way they described it was if you cut in place 10 stones a day it would take you 664 years yeah so how long do they think it took they weigh between 2 and 80 tons they don't know they don't know how long it took but they know that it was constructed somewhere in the neighborhood of 2500 BC, based on carbon dating. So they don't even know exactly which pharaoh built it.

They get real weird with what they go on in terms of what's the evidence that someone made this. One of them is the Sphinx. someone made this or like one of them is the Sphinx, the way they decided to attribute the Sphinx to one guy where there's a passage that it says that he, it came to him in a dream that if he uncovered the Sphinx, that he would be the Pharaoh. He would become the Pharaoh of Egypt if he uncovered it. And so the speculation by the people that are sort of backdating history is

that the Sphinx could have entirely been covered in sand. It could be incredibly ancient. Because when Napoleon found it, it was covered in sand. When people found it in the 1800s, there's actually photographs of it before they had dug it out and excavated it. Is the thing about shooting the nose off, is that a fake thing? Supposedly it's true. Somebody fucked the nose up. Whether it was napoleon or one of his crew that's i don't know

if they know that for sure i know they do know that the nose and the face are different from the original nose and face the original face they think was an was a lion well that's amazing like just people's love of faces. Like there's a human you've ever heard. I feel like I've talked about it where the, there was a, they, they put,

uh, monkeys. It's like, it's a, it's a defensive, like star power and charisma. They put, uh,

monkeys in, in a lab. They gave them the option of unlimited cherry flavored, juicy juice, or they could watch video of the leader of their uh pack and they chose watching video the leader of the pack wow yeah it's this thing in human beings like needing needing kind of gods needing uh uh some sort of pillar or needing something to like it also

speaks to just charisma isn't impossible also though that what they really needed is to get the fuck out of that cage and that the leader of their pack on a video maybe like let them know like maybe someone's gonna let me out of here maybe just pay attention maybe yeah but that's also

something to like there's something about certain people you just like watching. Hmm. Like there's a certain element. Right. It's charisma. Charm.

Whatever you want to say. Like certain people that you see them and you're like, okay. It's the definition of charisma is you want to say yes before you know what the question is. Hmm. And these monkeys got it, Joe. They got that charisma? They got the it factor.

I'll tell you, doing the Italian thing with your fingers. They fucking got that thing. They got this thing. Well, that sort of makes sense when you think about kings and pharaohs and the fact that there's always been this alpha character. There's always been this one ruler for pretty much every civilization. Every single city, every single every civilization every single city every single state every single country always has yeah that one charismatic leader that stands in front of the people and

lifts his hands up and everybody well that's the thing that people underestimate and i don't think we should talk about trump for a long time but but that's he's got a lot of charisma say what you want about the guy he's got a ton of charisma. He's got a weird kind of charisma. Yeah. He's got like this mean guy charisma where you want him to like you, so you say things. That you don't even believe. Yeah, because you want him to think that you're on his side, so he won't come after you. Yeah.

It's like a bully charisma. Yeah, that's absolutely right. But it's charisma nonetheless. And that's the thing about stars and movie stars and shit like that is like you're watching this guy you watch denzel washington waiting for him to snap he never does but you're wait you can tell he's gonna he just doesn't it's like robert downey jr i feel like with robert downey jr you're watching a guy not do cocaine. Yeah. He wants to do everything in him wants to do cocaine. So you're watching a guy actively not do cocaine from second to second.

That's such a good analysis. Yeah. That's so true. You're just watching this guy, this thing, this car accident that never happens. Yeah, you're watching a guy struggle slightly with sobriety. Yes, you're watching a guy almost, you see it on him. It's kinetic. He's just got a little bit of, and that little bit allows him to be like snarky and weird and get away with it.

Yeah, because daddy didn't get his medicine. Wow. But you could almost do that with a lot of dramatic stars. Comedy stars less so. But there's something about Tom Cruise that's that. Oh, yeah, for sure. Right? Like, you're just watching.

I don't know if he's... He's not going to snap. He's almost going to, like, fly away or something. Well, he'll snap if you talk about, like, psychiatric drugs. Yeah. Like, he would snap. Like he did on Brooke Shields. Yeah.

Matt Lauer. You're glib, Matt. Like he would snap. Like he did on Brooke Shields. Yeah. Matt Lauer. You're glib, Matt. You're glib. That was amazing. Yeah. That was a perfect example of why really big time movie stars should not have podcasts.

You're 100% right. You're absolutely right. But it's also a testament to his charisma that he said that and we're still like, ah, fuck it. I need testament to his charisma that he said that, and we're still like, ah, fuck it. I need him to be a movie star more than I need him to agree with me about religion. Yeah, he bounced back.

But what's really interesting is what he bounces back on, like he's most successful, is these wackadoo fucking science fiction movies. That's where he's done the best since that. The Day After Tomorrow thing or whatever that one was? Yeah, whatever the fuck it is. Whack-a-doo fucking science fiction movies. That's where he's done the best since that the The day after tomorrow thing or the whatever that yeah, whatever Edge of tomorrow beginning. What is it? There's two of them. He did two of them. He did two they did Like one impossible for the ones that those are his bread and butter at this point. Yeah that too Yeah, that's true. But that's tomorrow movie was a good movie fucking very good. Yeah Yeah, you know was a really good movie and I movie was a good movie. Fucking very good. Yeah.

You know what was a really good movie? And I don't know if you... Deadpool. Did you see Deadpool? Yes! I couldn't fucking believe how much I loved Deadpool. I saw it on an airplane. Me too. And it kept cutting out, and it was still excellent.

Yes! It was really good. Like, I'm not going to say it was perfect, but there were some... Moment to moment, it was as good a movie as I can remember. Yeah, for a superhero movie, it's probably as good as it gets. Yeah, I totally agree. Yeah, that was a really good movie. Yeah, I was very, very pleased with that movie.

Because I had no expectations. Yeah. And at the end, he still gets to bang the girl. So there you go. The way they banged, that banging montage was great. And then him putting up a picture of, what's his name? On his face. face yeah it's just like that's really fun like it's like where they let writers write well like yeah just that's a

funny idea so we'll just do that well i saw ghostbusters i didn't see it and i like which i feel awful about there's some funny shit in ghostbusters like overall it's not a good movie it's just not a good movie but they did not a good movie, but they did some funny shit They they came up with some fun, and I almost want to know like man What could this have been if you let whoever came up with all that funny shit? Yeah, just make make a movie out of it where they scenes where they died was a dance scenes in dialogue There were scenes and it was such a combination of things that movie and it so had the feeling of the hands of the producers and the executives it's so how well that's what

you you in some ways the thing i liked about deadpool was i was watching it going the producers of this movie did a good job where they were like this moment doesn't work make it work right every day like micromanage like i worked on chris rocks maybe top five a little bit like for a couple i just consulted for a couple weeks and the producers this guy named scott rudin who's like a famous producer and what i couldn't believe was the level of detail that guy was worried about it was he busted chris's balls for a year about the script literally made him rewrite and rewrite and rewrite and rewrite and rewrite and then on set the guy was worried about shirts and buttons and that's what I realized like okay these Deadpool producers whereas it feels like maybe on Ghostbusters it got you got to get you have to get lucky too with studio where they they you all have an agreed to set of of what's good and then you build the movie from there was also there's a problem that the movie had a very clear agenda to be a pro-woman movie yeah which it gets

i mean there's nothing wrong with being pro-woman but if that's what you're trying to do it's like it's a goofy it's not a theme for a movie a comedy movie it feels like all the men are buffoons they're not just buffoons they're they're cartoonishly retarded yeah like uh chris whatever the fuck his name is thor thor is so retarded it doesn't even make sense yeah he's he's so fucking stupid it doesn't make sense but they keep him around because he's beautiful and that's like the joke well that's a funny, but I like these revenge jokes where it's like so you're just gonna do What men did how long is this gonna last like what's the next? Yeah, it's easy for a man to say like hey do something else, honey

But like but it just feels like there's got to be like a next a next There's a lot of like rep Retribution right now that's what Twitter is it was just wasn't believable a lot of what twitter is how twitter is it's a lot of people it's like digital lynch mobs of people and that are rightly so they'll go after people for saying something fucked up about race like they went up to justin like a few weeks ago because he said something we're all the same and then it's like but what you can't say that and it just becomes this mob of people and it's purely about racial revenge as far as i'm concerned well it's it's definitely about people having the opportunity to shit on somebody and having people that didn't have the opportunity to before yeah and now they have it

via they it's like they have social cachet and they have social power and they use it for the same bullshit that white people used it for well it's not even just black people doing it it's a lot of white people or women any any any yeah any sort of marginalized group whether it's poor any like literally any group but this movie like this is there's a bunch of problems with the movie but this the the fact that all the men in the movie were ridiculous all the men this movie were buffoons all the men in the movie were ridiculous all the men this movie were buffoons All the men in the movie like they like Bill Murray gets fucking killed in it spoiler alert. Yeah, I mean it It's weird. It's weird. It's like it's an agenda driven movie more than they wrote something

They figure well It'll work if you do this or it'll work if you do this. Or it'll work if you do that. Like, they didn't even have romantic interests in the movie. Because men were just so retarded. Yeah. Like, the women didn't have boyfriends. They didn't have husbands. They didn't have, like, they had Chris Townsworth. Yeah.

But that's it. And he was just eye candy. Well, the thing I always tell people is when you're writing about a specific gender. candy well the thing i always tell people is when you're writing about a specific gen like for a long time women in comedy women in comedy movies were uh props or they were like andy mcdowell always used to be like the love interest andy mcdowell uh and she was always just like this warm sort of like vaguely disapproving it's either like you're disapproving of the guy or you're approving to a fault because that's if you're if there's a movie about a certain uh gender which is usually men the women in their lives for the plot to advance they'd either have to be for the plot or against the

plot right so then women started complaining like well you see us as these binary goofy things and obviously women in life are more complex than that so so now that women are starting to get their own movies and it's about groups of women you see it's it's a writing problem it's you're in a trap where the men in bridesmaids were goofy as fuck it was an irish cop in milwaukee tell me more because i've never seen that in my fucking whole life a guy who's just like and Bridesmaids is a fucking masterpiece for the most part just that part I was kind of like wait so he's a cop and he's got an endless uh uh uh appetite for

wig even though she's not interested and was a shit and was dicky to him but he's still he'll take her back whatever uh and it becomes about he's basically the only man in the movie and it's kind of a goofy part and it's what's because it's about a group of women and that's just the purpose that men have in that plot you know what i mean but they but they always they people take it as like this a sexism thing and i just take it as like a screenwriting thing well it is that definitely but one of the problems that people have found when they're talking about this movie is that you can't Criticize it because if you criticize it you're sexist yeah, yeah, and no it's not it's not a good piece of art Yeah, there you go. It's not really well done

Yeah, but but there's a moment who did who did bridesmaids that I'm talking about it's like a guy same guy who did it He's done. Well whatever. he's done it twice now. But like, I think he knows, he's a really good writer. Like he knows you can, it's hard to write because it's never been, I always tell people this, I go, show me a good example of a movie about a group of guys where the woman isn't just, even in Deadpool, she's a prop to the, but they make fun of it. She's in love with him unconditionally. Even though his face turns into a monster,

she still wants him to eat her pussy. And they make fun of it. Yeah. They make fun of it in a funny way. Like their meet up, their meet cute. And then the thing about like the damage they both are, that was like perfect to me.

Right. It was brief. And it, it's like the thing they always complain about when you're developing movies like i don't buy this couple it's like yeah it's a fucking movie right sorry like they're just not i don't buy a lot of real couples well not only that they have to spell it all out in two hours yeah and they have to meet and fall in love within five minutes well there's a lot more to a relationship than that yeah yeah we can't show you all that other shit yeah because

that takes hours yes days and weeks and months. And you fuck. That is correct. The sad thing about the movie, the, the Ghostbusters movies, there's some stuff in it that was really clever. There was funny stuff. And I,

in the beginning I was enjoying it. I was like, you know what? I bet people are not giving this thing a fair shake. And then as it got on and I was like, Oh, they just, this is just so clunky.

Yeah. There's parts of it they were just so clumsy and just poorly poorly i gotta see it because every single one of those women are fucking home run hitters yeah melissa mccarthy is fucking funny man dude she's funny fucking funny who's wig christian wig which one she uh she was in bridesmaids. I don't know what she was. Oh, she's the auburn-haired woman? Yeah. And Leslie's a fucking monster.

She's handicapped in it. They give her some clunky lines. Yeah. And then the girl from SNL, Kate McKinnon, is really, really funny. She was really funny in it. Yeah. She was very funny in it. Look, it's not that bad. I mean, I didn't hate it I went to see with my kids they enjoyed it but um

there was there were some moments I laughed pretty hard great but most of it not yeah it's hard to make funny movies man and you know it's like at the end the way they wrap it up you're like oh Christ like get the fuck out of here it's like it's so clumsy oh it's just so awkward somebody told me there were no stakes in the movie it was just like yeah there's ghosts and we're gonna fight them yeah and uh we got them yeah yeah it is weird that's hot fucking i mean it's making a funny good movie is really hard. No, not a big budget movie. A big budget with a legacy and a release date. Yeah, and if there was no Ghostbusters before it,

there had never been a Ghostbuster movie, and this was the first ever Ghostbuster movie. We wouldn't be talking about Ghostbusters. It would be different. Yeah. Well, maybe people would enjoy it more, and maybe they wouldn't be so handicapped because they had to sort of connect with the legacy and tie all these loose ends in and they can kind of do it any way they want.

But that's really a part. Whenever you're trying to redo an old movie, even if you do a great job, like remember Jason Statham redid The Mechanic? Mm-hmm. Like, dude. I didn't know that was a remake. You're doing a fucking Charles Bronson movie? You didn't know that was remake a fucking charles bronson movie you didn't even know that no oh my god no charles bronson and um that handsome fella

from those 70s who went crazy uh god damn it what is robert blake no that was another one what is his name um charles bronson in the mechanic what is the other he was this really handsome actor who became like a crazy alcoholic he was really huge dan michael vincent yes i was gonna get nick nolte but he would have been the next he was really huge back then like he's beautiful goddamn frame right there look at that hair and those just tombstones in the back bronson bronson's one of my all-time favorites he was great so that's what we call graphic right there yes perfect and by the way no video that's film ladies and gentlemen that's that's organic it's american back then when they um would do a movie like this too i mean like you didn't get that many movies every week it's not like today jan michael vincent played his um his protege and charles bronson was a hitman you saw this

in the theater tv i was i think i saw it on television the first time it was 1972 i don't think i've ever seen a charles bronson movie so he they're just all revenge movies right who the fuck are you? This is not a revenge movie necessarily. I mean, in some ways it kind of is. But really what it is- Death Wish is a revenge movie, right? Yes.

Death Wish was a white man's dream. The white man is going to go out- They raped his daughter or something? A bunch of dark-skinned people? I don't remember exactly what the premise behind it was. I don't know who that guy is, but I like it. He's interesting. But Charles Bronson and Jan Michael Vincent, they had this movie, which was a classic movie at the time.

And then it was redone with Jason Statham and this other guy who is a really good actor. Ben Foster. That's him? Ben Foster? Who was in that movie 30 days of night did you ever see that movie no i didn't see that but he was good in uh in he was good in another movie that with woody harrelson yeah about the about iraq yes i know what you're talking about i don't remember the name he's great in everything, that fucking guy. He's such a good actor. There he is, all creepy looking.

So he played the Jan Michael Vincent character, which is an interesting sort of twist on things. It wasn't a bad movie. It was a pretty good movie. I enjoyed it, like as far as like a mindless action movie. Yeah. But you're redoing a fucking Charles Bronson movie, man. As soon as you try to redo a Charles Bronson movie. Do you have any desire for remakes?

I'm never like, oh, thank God they're remaking it. Because I just would rather watch the original. Yeah. Because it contains everything I want, which is the actual movie and then the memories I have of it. I like when they remade the Hulk. Because they kept doing it over and over and over again. Well, yeah, that's just a funny fucking guy trying a bit that's never gonna work but they did it with eric bana that was shit that was the that was the super emotional one right

that was the yang li one that was like very emotional yes i gotta say i didn't really like the last avengers or not the i should say the first avengers because it just seemed like like they just it spent the whole movie just like hey you guys want to okay you got to come fight and they'd be like no I don't want to no you got to come all right I'll come and then they had a big fight at the end but the Hulk one was especially shitty I saw the Avengers right after I saw Ex Machina which was one of my all-time favorite movies Ex Machina was very good yeah incredible I saw I saw that one week and then I saw The Avengers the next week, and I was like, this is shit. This is clunky.

Clunky-ass fucking movie. But Homeboy played a way better Hulk. What the fuck's his name? Mark Ruffalo? Ruffalo, and then Ed Norton did it, too. Or Ed Norton was in the original. No, he did the second one. What is the Hulk's deal?

He just doesn't want to fight? He's very strong, but he's not interested? No. He's a scientist. The scientist was doing an experiment. He was exposed to massive levels of gamma radiation. Yeah. And when he gets angry, you don't want to know when he's angry.

I understand. I don't want. I'm not interested in that. Yes. Plus, he's angry all the time. That's Mark Ruffalo. I'm always angry. He's seizing. That's a secret. Oh, is that true? That's a secret. Oh, got it. Yeah. Because he's angry all the time. That's Mark Ruffalo. I'm always angry.

He's seething. That's a secret. Oh, is that true? That's a secret. Oh, got it. Yeah. So he's a rageaholic. Yeah.

He just keeps it together, but at any moment, he can just let it go. And when he decides to let it go, rawr! And he can't control it? Because why isn't it just one of these things? Because in the Avengers, it seemed like they were like, hey, come help us with this specific guy. Yeah. And he did. I think it's tough to get him to pay attention. But that's the premise, right?

You can't, he can't guide it because it just seems like, hey, Hulk, come. And he's like, but I don't, you guys are going to make me get angry. It seems like a small price to pay. Like, yeah, fucking get a little bit angry, guy. We need you to save the world, you piece of the world you save the world you fucking selfish fucking animal well when they go to find him the first time he's in like bangladesh like yeah he was in the yeah he was in like at a at a like an uh remember save the children type yes yes yeah i feel like i've given money to support whatever the hulk is working whatever dr bruce and they come and get him with fucking rifles drawn and everything like that

Like didn't you realize like you can't move. What if I fucking move? Yeah What are they gonna do they're gonna shoot him before he moves they can't do anything You guys you have bad news for the Hulk wait until just the right moment to tell So you just run you that and also your wife fucking somebody and then you're fucking runoff Well, maybe that would be the way that you would get him to stop that. No, just give him ecstasy. Oh, that's funny Yeah, yeah, just that's the the way that you would get him to stop being the Hulk. Just give him ecstasy. Oh, that's funny. Yeah. Yeah. That's the new treatment for the Hulk.

Just keep him on very micro doses of ecstasy all day long. I know a ketamine guy if you need that. I also am a little mad that Lou Ferrigno is not involved because he, to me, was the ultimate Hulk with the ripped jorts, the ripped jean shorts. That is always going to be the problem with the Hulk, is how the fuck are those pants still on? Yeah. It should be a dick flapping.

Oh, for sure. Mark, look, I can't even wear pants from someone who weighs 20 pounds less than me. Yeah, look at him. Just to add to the 70s, it's brown corduroys. That's how we used to do it back then, Joey. Yeah. Brown fucking corduroys. Well, it was supposed to be purple back then, Joey. Yeah. Brown fucking corduroys. Well, it was supposed to be purple.

The Hulk always had purple pants. Oh, that's interesting. For whatever weird fucking... See, it's blue jeans. Okay. But if you go to the Hulk, like the cartoon Hulk, you'll see that he always had purple pants. Green and purple are a better mix than green and brown. Watch the Hulk's pants.

P-A-N-T-S. You've watched Pumping Iron, right? Look at that. See? Oh, he's purple. Yeah. What the fuck is that? Yeah, I've seen Pumping Iron.

You see the new one? Generation Iron? No. Good? It's on Netflix. Yeah? It's a banger. Really?

It's a banger. It's also got one of my favorite moments in a documentary ever, which if you want to bring it up and you don't laugh at this, then you're not yourself. This is like an alien test. Like, no, this is Joe Rogan. I believe it's Joe Rogan.

If you laugh at this. Well, then now you're setting it up. It's a weighted moment. I know. Is that good? It's that good. It's the funniest moment I've ever seen in a documentary. Really?

Yes. Are you going to spoiler alert it? No, I'm not going to spoiler alert it. Should we play it? Yeah. If you bring it spoiler alert it? No, I'm not going to spoiler alert it. Should we play it? Yeah, if you bring it up on Netflix, I will show you where it is. Might not be able to do that. It's 54 minutes in.

I recommend this clip a lot. Don't you think the clip is probably on YouTube if it's that strong? Maybe. What is it? Generation Iron Horse. Generation Iron Horse scene. Separate words. wrong maybe what is it once you look up uh generation iron horse generation iron horse scene separate words interesting i stand by it so is it uh just a new film it's basically yeah it's a new film about all right back it up back it up back it up pause it pause it okay oh fuck

you gotta hear the guy set it up go all the way to the back of the clip i don't think it's long enough if you show and if you show me another one the guy talks about you see what it is uh-huh guy riding a horse right if you go back uh to and uh the thing is he talked about how he never gets injured okay he's literally about how he never gets injured. He's literally talking about, I never get injured. People say I get injured. That wasn't even a real injury. And now... The past two injuries I've had weren't in the gym.

They were outside the gym. So I haven't been hurt in the gym since 2003. Let's go. Oh shit, the horse is bucking him. Son of a bitch. The horse just decided enough. Yeah, the horse has had enough of him talking about never being injured. He's talking about not getting injured, and the horse throws him off the fucking horse. It's such fucking poetry to me.

And he lands hard. He lands hard and says, oh, Jesus, as he lands. He's so big. You would think that guy's like, well, I guess he's kind of protecting a little bit, all that muscle. Do you see that car accident sculpture?

Yes. Yeah. That's right up your alley. Yeah. Well, explain what you're talking about. There's a, there was an art installation, a,

so made a sculpture of what the human body would need to look like to withstand a car accident. To evolve in order to be able to withstand car accidents. I don't know how the fuck they figured this out, though. That's one of the weird things. I was like, why are their arms so skinny? Like, that's one image of it. Because there's nothing important in the arms. It's to protect your brain and your heart.

Is that what it is? Yeah. Why does it have nipples? Like, what are all those nipples all over the rib cage? I think those are like padding. Maybe those are nipples. Whatever it is. Those are like when you first get nipples when you're like in your 14.

What is all that stuff? All those weird things? Yeah, I guess those are nipples. What are those things? Ridges? What are those things? Ridges? Isn't it funny that what we look at today when we see a person, we think it's normal.

But it's just what we're used to. It's just what happened. It's just what we are. I mean, people are fucking weird looking. By the way, they didn't do this guy any favors with the facial hair and the haircut. Yeah, it's a weird goatee. Like why? Like he looks extra monkey-ish.

He looks very odd. It's really disgusting. Yeah, it's a weird choice. And also, like, the line to heaven down to his pecker. That hairline. Yeah. It's a weird hair trail. Like, what is going on there? It looks like a constellation or something.

It looks like an outer spaceship. Or like a Tesla or something yeah outer spaceship or like a Tesla coil yeah radiating air yeah it's uh I don't know I guess do you have a Tesla you don't right no I do not oh you made the observation or maybe it was you or burr made the observation what if there's a power outage yeah well that's there's that for sure, but I drove one for a day, and I was shocked at how quick the battery went down. Oh, really? Yeah. I drove from here to my house, to the improv, to my house, to here again,

and it was more than half dead. And how many miles was it? 80, 100? That's not even 60. That's too bad. That's not even 60. That's too bad. Yeah. I mean, maybe 70, 80, maximum. Maximum 80.

And it was more than half dead. So when they say you can go 300 miles without a charge, or what are they saying, 250, 250 miles? That's under ideal conditions on the highway, 65 miles an hour drafting behind a fucking semi you know it's not like stop and go traffic it's not it's not uh you know just it's not speeding up slowing down yeah it's not lights it's it's not ready it's not ready i think it's ready i think it's i mean depending on how far you need to go that's full is still pretty good. Well, sure, you could use it. Because the average person only drives 35 miles a day. Yeah, I mean, for sure you could use it as a daily driver if you could plug it in every night.

But it's not ready for me to adopt. It's just too limited. The fact that it takes so long to recharge, like you can charge in for a certain amount of time and it'll give you like 80%, or the idea that maybe they could swap batteries. You pull into a place, and they take your batteries out and give you new batteries. But then you've got to trust that they're connecting the batteries right. You've got to trust that the batteries are good. You've got to trust who had the batteries before.

Did anybody drop them or crack them? Are they going to light my fucking car on fire now? Because that was one of the issues they were having with people in the early— The Chevy Volt, I have it, and there's been no—I get 300 miles a gallon i've got that's a hybrid though right yeah yeah what the teslas when they first came out were developing issues where the underbody would get hit by rocks and would start fires and then uh do you remember the fisker fisker karma yeah do you know how that would kill that thing no happened? Remember that big storm that hit the East Coast? There was a big storm that hit the East Coast.

The Sandy one? Yeah, I think that was a couple years back. Yeah. Destroyed a lot of houses in Long Island. Yeah, that was Hurricane Sandy. They hit a port. The storm hit a port where these things were parked. And apparently, when they get up to door door height in water they explode look at this

this is the uh see that see all those fires going on over there in the distance oh that was the that's the transformer that's not the cars that's the transformer that's the transformer on the east village is this a different video yeah that's a c Con Ed Explosion. No, you got the wrong... But there's one that's like this. It's pretty similar. Find the video of the... Hurricane Sandy Fires. Maybe I'm wrong.

Maybe they don't have a video of it. I thought they did. I thought I remember seeing it. See if you can find it. Anyway, point being, those things, when you get them wet, they blow up, which is not good. No, it's not great. People don't like that. So that company went under.

Yeah, I have a Volt. It's been great. That's a good move. A hybrid is a really good move. Yeah. Because you get gas and electricity. You can kind of run on both. 40 electricity every charge, and I can charge it in four hours for a full charge.

And pickup's good? Drive's good? I'm not like, i never really need i'm like the only time i'm using pickup is when i'm driving like a dickhead right you know what i mean so if i try not to drive like that but if i'm cutting people off and doing shit like that then you need yeah i need pickup because i'm an asshole right uh but for the most part i don't need pickup like day to day you can only go so Well, one of the cool things about a Tesla is the idea of driverless driving. That is fucking amazing.

And I don't blame Tesla at all for the guy dying recently. The one, the autopilot one. I think they've determined that autopilot didn't have anything to do with that. He was watching Harry Potter. He was? Yeah. It was proven. It was still playing it was like greg geraldo's joke about about rappers showing watching porn when they

get into an accident and they're on the side of the road and the porn is still playing rappers watching uh i think it was rappers why it was it was people having uh everyone on cribs had uh monitors in their SUVs. And he was talking about if you got into an accident and you're dying and it's still playing fucking dumb shit on your monitor. It's still playing porn? Yeah, I think it was porn. There was a guy who got killed in Michigan. He was jerking off while he was driving.

His car flipped. He was jerking off to his phone. Just wait, man. Yeah, he can't wait. His car flipped and he died. And he died with his pants down. His phone was still playing the porn when they pulled his lifeless body from the wreckage. That's a long clip, by the way.

More than a dozen Fisker Karma hybrids caught fire and exploded. No video, just pictures, I guess. So we're wrong. Yeah. So we have false memories. Yeah. God damn it. That's what happened with Trump on 9-11.

Yes, didn't he help? He saw celebrators. Oh, yeah. in New Jersey. He saw them all the way across the river. Yeah, well, some people must have celebrated. So what? I don't think anybody was celebrating. I mean, I don't think anybody in Jersey.

I'm sure people were like, yes, but I don't think people were going outside and fucking. Who knows? Because that'll get you popped. Maybe. Back then they didn't know. Well, no one. I mean, that's a

fucking chaotic moment to be able to predict what's going to happen yeah who did it yeah exactly who knows what was going on then they didn't know when that first happened yeah i mean they could have been instead of celebrating they could have been just going whoa that's crazy well you know what's funny is i think when i i think think I saw it happen, but I was in Paris and I saw like someone said like, I am very sorry what happened to your country. And I was like, what are you talking about? Like the World Trade Center. And I'm like, what?

And then I ran to a monitor and saw some, but in my head I saw it live, but I just didn't. Right. Do you know what I mean? Like that's the faulty, faultiness of memories, which is creepy that you can't, it's like you say shit with absolutely no certainty at this point. Memories are very bad. Yeah. And I have some super clear memories that I can verify, but I've also got a lot of fuzzy

ones. And the problem is when people start attaching all sorts of emotions and all sorts of different things to memories, and then they start distorting them and then repeating the distortion of the memory until that becomes the memory. And then in their mind, like there's people that have been involved in business deals, and they think that they were so wronged and everything went so terrible and this piece of shit. And then my wife left me. And then when you break down to them no no no that didn't happen at all this is what happened like they don't want

to hear the real and those are people i think that are a little bit crazy i'm talking about you ever be arguing with your wife and you're like i didn't say that and then you think like did i say that like especially if you're barely attention. That's the key. Long-term relationship keys. Just got to be able to hit the fade button. They do. Is that you think that's helpful? They drown out. And you think she realizes it?

What? Do you think she knows that? I don't know what you're talking about. What did you say? What did you say? Yeah. Yeah. You just fade out.

But that's exactly the kind of conversations you start having. Like, what did you just say? What? I just lost everything. What did you say? Yeah. So then we're going to light it all on fire. What?

Yeah. Okay, now I have to pay attention. What are you going to light on fire? Who's going to light what on fire? Yeah, but that's the thing about relationships. It's all kind of important, but none of it's that important. In retrospect. Hindsight.

But in the day, on the second of it. Sometimes. Yeah. The most nonsensical thing can be so important, Neil Brennan. Yeah. So important. You have many daughters. Well, my situation is pretty comfortable and easy to manage, but I have some friends that

have some bad relationships with their wives, and it's basically when they get together, it's just who's going to win today's wrestling match. Yeah. How many people do you know with with marriages that you envy let's say you weren't married that's a good question not many because that's the thing it's like i like not many it's you know most of them are it looks especially from the outside it looks like way too much work yeah and it looks like disastrous happenings once it breaks off which is different than a

boyfriend girlfriend if a guy and a girl are dating and they just decide to call it off like this isn't working yeah that's it yeah it's there's very little cleanup yeah well that's it yeah but if you are some man or some woman even like a woman who makes a shitload of money and she has a husband that's kind of a layabout and then that's starting to happen fuck yeah it is yeah fuck yeah it is and then all of a sudden this dude wants a ton of alimony yeah like yeah like jesus christ and this woman who doesn't even like this guy anymore has to pay him you know 10 or 15 percent of her salary every week and she's just like i can't even believe this like that is always been the case with men and women with the man having to pay the woman it's always it's it's been alimony's been

around forever right child support alimony but now that it's in more and more cases becoming the woman paying the man like talk to roseanne barr about how much she had to pay Tom Arnold. And you're like, what? Yeah. This is, it's legalized stealing mixed in with prostitution. It's a long con prostitution. Yeah.

In many ways. And it's involving the legal system and the banks. And as soon as there's a system that's set up where people are profiting off that system, good luck prying it from their fucking hands. Yeah. And that's the political system that we have right now, but it's also the marriage system.

Like, if you've talked to someone who's gone through horrific divorces and had to deal with the financial implications or complications, it gets insane. Well, that's what a buddy of mine was like. My wife, the sad thing is, the deal she's going to get, I offered her two years ago. But she's just dragging it out. They want to drag it out because it costs you money and legal fees, too.

That's right. And you're still connected to them, and they're punishing you if you want to get the divorce. Even if you don't want to get the divorce. There's a reason why they want to get the divorce. They're mad at you for some shit you fucking... My friend has to pay his ex-wife for the rest of her life. And he has a new wife.

He has a family. He's got kids. She doesn't have a new husband, though. No. Yeah. If she has a new husband, then the money cuts off. So he has to pay her

hundreds of thousands of dollars every single year for the rest of her life It's almost like he fucked her so hard. She can't work anymore. Yeah, like that's what the court said That's what the court was guy. Well, that's what it is. It's like how feeble were I guess I guess it's societally like Women had it so much worse in the 70s when these laws were made But it seems like there needs to be some kind of correction. You can't have it so that if a guy is married to a woman, he has been not married to her more than he has been married to her.

He was married to her for like 12 years. He's been divorced for like 14. But it doesn't matter. He still owes all that money. Because they broke up, he has to pay her because they went past 12 years being married or whatever the number was he has to pay her for the rest of her time on earth like he he might not have any relationship to her he is responsible for her survival forever and not just survival, but living really well. Like that's,

I guess the question is how important were the women who got these laws passed? Meaning what do you think you're doing that is entitling you to this money? And this goes for men now too. Cause it's like, well, how good of a husband are you that you deserve half of her income forever? Clearly, you weren't that good because shit didn't work.

Right. So there should be a penalty right there. There's not. I don't think they usually get half forever. Or whatever. But they get a giant chunk. Yeah, a chunk and then a stipend. Yeah, they get a monthly payment.

It's just strange that someone could, like, people meet each other and then it doesn't work out anymore. They like each other, they spend time, then they don't want to spend time. And when they don't want to spend time, to all of a sudden legally obligate them to send money. Like, this is not, we're not talking about someone who, by virtue of their relationship, could no longer move her body. You know, like, if a man and a woman gets together, the man has to pay because once a man starts fucking a woman, they eventually go paralyzed. It's just how it works. I mean, if that was the case.

Yeah, if that was the case, well, yeah, you have to take responsibility for having sex because the man does something to the woman's body. By the way, guys would still claim, like, that wasn't even me, man. Other guys are fucking harder. You think I'm the only one? You think I could even fuck a woman in fucking into a vegetable. Yeah it's it's stealing, but it's also like you're cornering a person and Forcing them to just get thrust into this weird legal system. So this weird legal system

It's pulling like as this thing is spiraling down. the legal system is pulling money out of it. So there's this guy who's earning all this money. He works 12 hours every day. He's constantly hustling and doing deals and this and that. And he's putting it all together. And while he's getting divorced to this woman, they're going through the court system. divorced this woman they're going through the court system and the court system in this two-year fight is spinning this whole thing back and forth and you you need to get more ma'am because you have to consider his earning potential is going to increase over the next few years and it wouldn't

have happened if you weren't around i mean your stability in the relationship is part of the reason why he had the confidence to pursue these business deals and you should be compensated well that's what i wonder who were these wonderful people that do this? Lawyers. No, I know, but who was the woman that they could hold up as like, well, you did this, therefore, blah, blah, blah. Like, what was the testimony? My theory is that, well, first of all, you know, lawyers, a lot of them get a percentage.

Yeah. So I think there's that. Yeah. Also, and they make the laws. Yeah. Or argue the laws, for sure. There's a strong benefit to there being an extreme financial consequence for getting divorced. A strong benefit to the people that profit from taking people to divorce court. And by the way, that benefit doesn't exist like the other way.

Like if your lawyer saves you a fuckload of money, he doesn't get a percentage of what he saves you. Yeah. But if the lawyer on the other side, if they can figure out a way to get the court to rob you, like and you got to give your wife $50 million or something like that, like that lawyer gets a chunk of that. Like he gets paid if he's successful. They're incentivized for the law to remain what it is.

Right, to attack the rich guy, to attack the man or the rich woman, the Roseanne Barr situation. But that's the way they get the money. They don't get the money

if you don't get penalized. Like if you go into the case scot-free and go, I'm not paying that bitch shit. This relationship's over. And the jury says we we agree mr brendan you can walk and so you're like that's right bitch all you're doing is going to pay your lawyers hourly rates and they have no there's no financial benefit to getting this

done quickly yeah the financial benefit is to drag this fucking thing on for two years and then let you know hey we got out of it you know and then you realize it's like mandatory minimum sentencing exactly nothing they can really do unless you have a prenup or you can do a uh get a litigator to or like a whatever the the the where they sort of a mediator uh i think you can get pay less than normal with mediator. Mm-hmm. I think you can get, pay less than normal with a mediator. There's also, here's another situation. Like, someone was talking to me about, like, a Donald Sterling type sugar daddy situation. Like, and they were saying that it's awful that, you know, these men get preyed upon by these vicious women. I'm like, if you don't know that that girl is fucking you because you're rich.

If you have $100 billion and you're 90 years old and this girl tells you she loves you and she's with you all the time, she's acting perfect, you don't know that she wants that money. And by the way, if she's fucking you, she deserves a lot of money. At least as much as you're going to get. At least half. Yes! A lot of money. At least as much as you're going to get. At least half. Yes!

If you're a Donald Sterling type character and you've got some 25-year-old super hot stripper that you're laying pipe to, you've got to pay her a lot. Because what she's doing is, first of all, very difficult to do. Yeah. She's pretending to be attracted to you and you're disgusting. And- It's acting and basically surgery. It's the worst parts of acting and surgery.

And it's super valuable to you. Like if you're that old rich guy and you have a 25-year-old wife. You can get anything on earth except young girls. You gotta pay. Literally, you can get anything you want. Like Lamborghinis cost less. They're more accessible to you than a young girl that's actually attracted to you. A young girl that's actually attracted to you doesn't exist.

They're unicorns. Yes. It's a leprechaun. Yes. Mythical creatures. They do not exist. Only in your imagination do they exist. You keep her like constantly like covered in diamonds and furs and whatever the fuck she needs and crocodile skin purses and Chinese named shoes and whatever the fuck you need.

Do you believe that it is possible to be legitimately attracted to a Donald Sterling type? I think there are women with big enough father issues that like, yeah, I'm legitimately attracted to him like I would be a 20 year old I would never say that any like anything when it comes to attraction is impossible yes exactly there's chubby chasers there's people that are into weird shit man there's people that are into weird shit and there's a lot of women that find like older men hot they like the idea yeah like some whitehaired old dude laying dick into them. Whoa. Who knows, man? Yeah, people like weird shit.

People like furries. There's a lot of people that are really into being a furry. I also have no problem with prostitution on its face. I don't have a... What do I care? Why is it okay to get a massage? It's not okay to get a handjob. Right. Exactly. Stupid. It's not okay to get a hand job. Right.

Exactly. Stupid. It's too good. Yeah. Well, it's, we're, we're regulating sex like we're Puritans. Yeah. It's, it's preposterous, but it's also, you have to think if it was legal, would it encourage or would it discourage the sex trade?

Like in terms of like, you have to worry about like sex slaves and some you know that's those those are real issues well and it's an issue that's completely unresolved because people on both sides of it claim they're right and they both seem to have a good argument and then also the the argument is like isn't it possible that there's a big fucking difference between a sex slave and a woman who like maybe she's like a young girl living in new york city the rent's really high she decides to fuck some rich guys for money. Like, why is that worse than working at Denny's? Yeah, exactly.

Yeah. Why is it worse? I would go a step further, which is, let's say it is an emotional problem. She was molested. She wants to over, she gets treated, whatever. That's no different than the reason most people I know are in showbiz. And I don't see anyone picketing that. That's true.

It's based on an emotional stunt. Right. And why is it sex? Why is sex the only thing that you can't take money for? Because Jesus. That's really why. Because Jesus.

Come on, man, that's a weird thing that sex is the only thing that you can't take money for ever. You can't take money for it. Yeah. But you can. You just got to be slick about it. You can. Yeah.

Well, they dress it up. Well, like if a girl's- They call it dinner. Yeah. If a girl's your sugar baby. Yeah. Is it sugar baby? Sugar?

No. Sugar baby. Sugar would be they would pay. Sugar daddy and sugar baby is your baby. Is that what it is? Sugar No, Sugar would be they would pay. Sugar Daddy and Sugar Baby is your baby. Is that what it is? Sugar Daddy, yeah. Okay. So whatever the girl's name, whatever you would call her,

if she's dating some super billionaire type, Richard Branson type character, and he just gives her a salary, like what if she's got a salary? It's like, look, baby, you get $5,000 a week to just go crazy with, they give you a credit card, it's got $50,000 limit, here's your fucking Bentley, here's the keys, you get $5,000 a week to just go crazy with. They give you a credit card. It's got a $50,000 limit. Here's your fucking Bentley. Here's the keys. You're all set.

Woo! She's on the payroll. Is that a prostitute? Roger Ailes, the guy at Fox News, had that. He did? On staff, yeah. And it was an open secret. How many did he have?

He had one. But then he would just harass everybody else. Really? Yeah, she was on staff for years. She was a researcher. Researcher? Yeah. Maybe she really was a researcher.

I'm sure she must have done something worthwhile. Yeah, definitely. At least something. Something to write up a memo or something. Is that a business partner? Well, that's the thing of this thing of sex. If you look at sex as this holy sacrament then it is uh if you look at every ejaculation as a holy sacrament which the church

would have you believe and then they get into government they make laws whatever uh then then it's not legal but if you look at it like uh a milking or even a teeth cleaning or a haircut or anything that you need, any service that you need fairly regularly, then it's, then all, all laws are like nonsense for the most part. Isn't part of the problem too, is the immediately accessible nature of the sex is,

is troublesome to some people because if you have a relationship with someone who's basically fucking you for your money yeah like at least you you have this relationship with them and you hang out with them for long you have to spend time with them there's a lot of time that's not having sex yeah so you actually have to be like friends with them yeah in some sort of a way but the sex for money thing you just show up and you go yeah i'd like to pay for sex and then you go and you have the sex and you're like here's your money thanks bye like people have a problem with the brevity of it like well he's not even entangled here yes it's too transactional it's not it's

it's a goes against god to their minds it goes against god it's like that's not what god god wants you to sit there and be bored yeah and go on a drive and help listen to their you they listen to your stupid stories you listen to their stupid stories you bore the fuck out of each other you comfort each other those are the rules yeah that's how we do things that's the fucking rules yeah you can't just be going in there all willy nilly getting paid money for sex yeah it's too it's it's like too and and i guess because sex can create life you know the other thing is the pill is pretty new man that's true too you know abortion and the pill are both pretty new and the laws haven't really caught up

well it's just you shouldn't be able to tell people what they can or can't do with their body that doesn't hurt anybody other than them yeah like you can't tell someone that they can or can't do with their body that doesn't hurt anybody other than them. Yeah. Like you can't tell someone that they can't play rugby. You can't say, no, you can't play rugby because rugby, they run into each other and you're going to get hurt. What do you think is going to happen in the NFL? I don't know enough about it. Yeah. But what I do know is that there's a lot of people that have some serious fucking brain

damage from playing football. There's no doubt about it. I've met people that have played for it that are pretty open about it. And then I met Michael Irvin. I don't know what issues he suffered from it, but that guy is sharp as a tack. He's sharp as a tack when you talk to him. Well, he offset it with cocaine. Is that what it is? Balance it out?

I don't know now, but yeah. Super intelligent, analytical guy. A lot of them are very smart, but it's a late-onset thing for a lot of guys. Yeah, no, for sure. I was talking to a guy who plays, and he was saying, I said something about he plays whatever, and he goes, he's like, it's not that hard. He goes, on offense, you have to remember more shit he goes but there

are times on defense where I'll black out and not know what's going on and you just keep playing mmm which is like Jesus yeah it's like all right so is the blackout from memory or from stress it's from impact impact head is Christ yeah cranial impact. And it sounds like that's all of them. He didn't say it like, he said it completely like conversationally. He didn't say it like,

oh, I got a problem, mister. Oh, man. Well, I think they're used to so much trauma. Yeah. They're used to running at each other full clip. Yeah. We don't think of it as being the most violent sport because we think of MMA as being more violent because you're actually trying to hit the person.

That's the goal is to try to hurt them with your hands or your feet. But it's not nearly as powerful as someone running into you. Someone running into you, that's a crazy amount of force. Into your head with their head. I think that's where the league may be headed is no helmets. Sometimes they go flying through the air. Like you see guys get clipped. And spin.

And they spin or they disgravitate. They like take, you're like, somebody just knocked a 200 plus pound man through the air like a pillow. Yeah. Like that, that's a car accident. Yeah. That guy just get hit by a truck. He got hit by a 300 pound truck.

Every play, i think someone died i'm not even kidding when i watch when you watch it you go oh that guy's dead he's definitely dead i know i'd be dead if that happened to me but it goes to that weird thing where they have powerful more powerful fucking mandibles and weird muscles and like i think they build up a tolerance i don't know about all that. I think after a while, they all just go down. What is this? Oh my god.

Yeah. Jesus Christ. Look at them running at each other. Here comes another guy. Look out. Boom. Boom. That was just a good play. That was an excellent play. But look, there's something dope about it, right? Like this guy.

Oh, my God. He took a hard hit there and he kept going. It's completely elemental. It's the most basic instinct in the world. It's like running from a scary thing. Yeah. That's true. There's that element of it that works.

It's so primal that you're like, God, it's so exciting. Oh! Yeah. That guy got lambasted. Yeah, there's something about you're running from someone who's trying to harm you as well. It's the most basic. Some primal shit. Yeah, primal, the monster, the lion, the whatever's coming to get you.

And then there's the warfare element like the the ground warfare of like capturing the the taking the the hill or whatever i get why it works i think they just got to get rid of the helmets it's amazingly difficult to maneuver your body the way these guys are doing yeah did you watch the oj documentary no the one of the the big big uh takeaways is uh how good oj was at football because you forget i'm what i'm not old enough to remember oj playing football so i heard he ran for 2 000 yards but they one of the episodes five five parts one of the parts it's basically just about that about how nice he was at football. Wow. And he did it in 14 games

and he was like, it's crazy. Well, you know, one of his doctors said that if he had to rerun the trial today, he would bring up CTE. Yeah. Which is that's a weird thing to do because then they would

have to admit that he actually did it because the trial... Yeah, but can you let... Then they have to make a law about that. What's weird, too, because we all know he's in jail for those murders. Yeah, they ain't calling it that. They're not calling it that. No, they found the loophole and they're like,

yeah, I don't see any reason to not use this. He's in jail for souvenirs. He's in jail for... That's a really... The fifth part, if you've got to watch it, by the way, I demand it. Okay. I absolutely demand it.

Because it recontextualizes something that you think you know everything about. And it talks to Mark Furman. Mark Furman's justification for not being racist is, I'm not racist. When I was out on the street, if somebody wanted to go with me, I'd fight him straight up.

And that's his reasoning. So therefore, therefore I'm not racist. Where you're just like, woo! But at the same time, I kind of like Mark Furman after watching the movie. Really? Kind of. Meaning, I understood his, he makes sense

to himself. You know what I mean? You see his lodgingging all right i know why he thinks the way he thinks um but uh not like i'm a fan of the guy but you know what i mean um i hear you i know what you're saying um but uh but yeah like it's an amazing movie and when you say could you could if if they did say it was CTE, then we've got to have laws in the book. It's like temporary insanity. Right. Well, not really. You'd have to really quantify what kind of an effect CTE had on him.

You'd have to be able to figure it out. Like, is it responsible for you going, man, I don't know. Should I? And take that from, man, I'm thinking about doing this too. Or is it completely responsible? Like, how much of the CTE is responsible for your decision-making process? Yeah. Well, there are guys that say they black out behaviorally.

They black out. And you have to believe them. You know, you have to think that there's for sure going to be some severe neurological implications of getting smashed in the head over and over again by big gigantic dudes like that you gotta and CTE suffering

you must have got a bunch of concussions right for sure yeah what were the vomiting and grogginess

and all that shit I don't know I do remember sparring sessions just sparring sessions where I got my bell rang and I'd go home and lay in bed

and my fucking head would be throbbing and aching just boom boom yeah I'm just sitting there every heartbeat and you're thinking what am I doing with my brain that's what I was thinking yeah like there's not even any money in this I'm like I'm getting punched in the head all the time yeah I was doing a lot of sparring and wearing headgear no no god no why gear I couldn't see kicks comingof. And wearing headgear? No. No. God, no. Why? Headgear, I couldn't see kicks coming.

I didn't like headgear. Headgear's weird when you're throwing kicks. Would other guys wear it? Guys wear them. I mean, a lot of UFC fighters wear them. A lot of people don't. I had a problem with them. I tried to wear the ones where there's a bar that goes across your face to protect your

nose. That's the worst. You can't see shit. a bar that goes across your face to protect your nose. That's the worst. You can't see shit. I had to, for me, I had to go like the Mike Tyson style, which is one that Mike Tyson used to wear, where he, a lot of his face was exposed. A lot of people kind of criticized it because they said that he was more open to cuts.

And there's a reason why they had those big cheek. But you can't see left and right, like peripherals. Like if you're sparring a guy and he throws like real wide stuff on you especially kicks guys who sneak kicks around your shoulder like you literally don't see them until they're on your neck yeah and it's not good i didn't like it i was like i'd rather get hit with no headgear on well then you have a chance yeah i feel like i can move with it better you still you're still in a bad spot but the real issue is cuts because a lot of guys get cut in sparring. You might collide heads. You might – an elbow or something like that.

And when that does happen, the problem is then it could delay a fight. And if you're an MMA fighter and you're training for it, it's probably pretty smart to wear headgear. But it doesn't really protect your head that much. In fact, there's an argument that it acts as more of a fulcrum point because the the headgear makes your head larger so you can like yeah that's interesting weight and everything it actually can make your head move more well it's funny what happens to your brain which is it just goes flying against your skull there's nothing technical about it it just goes like boom yeah yeah and it can't maintain signal while that's going on it can't

maintain order and especially if you get hit in the base of your head like one of the scariest kicks that you can get hit with that a lot of guys get hit with is neck kicks you get necked and uh when you get neck kicked guys go down like they got shot. Because of what gets hurt? It just shuts your brain off. Oh, it's like this thing? The jugular punch thing? No, it's the shin slams basically against the base of your skull. It's like really the back of the head.

The shin is basically a switchblade on your leg. Here, Google this. Ernesto Hoost KO's Maurice Smith. Maurice Smith is a good friend of mine, and he's a former UFC heavyweight champion, former world Muay Thai fighter, Muay Thai champion. He's a bad motherfucker.

But he fought this guy who's just one of the greatest of all time, Ernesto Hoost, and he got caught with a kick to his neck. And I knew how tough Maurice is, and I knew how good of a fighter he is. So when you see a guy who's at the level that Maurice is, watch this. Boop. See how he threw that over the top of his head? It's like the top of his spine.

Yeah, and it just shut Maurice off. Look at this. He slides on the outside, and he lifts his head up. He lifts his foot up, rather, and goes over the shoulder. Or Morris doesn't even see it coming until it's already too late, and it hits the back of his head. It's crazy. And that's his foot, which isn't even that hard.

Well, it's still hard. It's Ernesto Hoos' foot, but it could be way worse. You're right. If it was a little bit further back, then it would have been his shin. Like his shin, it's over. But a lot of guys knock guys out dead cold. Well, that's an elite. You can't punch the back of the head in boxing, right?

Right, but you can kick guys and when you land, it oftentimes lands in the back of the head and no one ever thinks there's anything wrong with it. It's real weird. It's a super gray area. So you can't punch in MMA? You cannot punch the back of the neck and head

but you can kick. Exactly. That's very odd. It's so odd. Well, it's an issue with kickboxing as well, because some of the best techniques land on the back of the head. Like, here's another one that does all the time, too. Wheel kicks. Like, someone will throw a wheel kick.

It's like a spinning heel kick. And they'll catch a guy. Boom! Right on the back of the head. It happens all the time. And technically, it's an illegal place to hit someone. But because head kicks are like, that's sort of like the ultimate striking weapon. Like if you knock someone out, like knocking someone out with a head kick is like the ultimate striking weapon.

Because it's everything we always wanted to see in karate movies. So because of that is so encouraged to like, whoosh, the guy just knocked him. He kicked him in the head. Holy shit. Because it's so encouraged, we don't think about the implications of kicking someone in the back of the head, which is probably way worse than punching someone in the back of the head. But it happens all the time in kickboxing and all the time in MMA. It's one of those weird things where nobody wants to talk about it, but everybody knows it's the case.

You're kicking a guy in a totally illegal spot but you're not trying to acknowledge how how double standard they all know it they all know it for sure everybody knows it especially everybody's been hit by one of those are hitting hit somebody with one of those you know where you're hitting them a lot of times you're hitting the back of the head if you're where can you punch if someone you can punch the all the back all over the body you can punch the legs you can't punch the groin but you can punch somebody in the ass you punch in the back? All over the body. You can punch the legs. You can't punch the groin. But you can punch somebody in the ass. You can punch in the back?

You can punch them in the back. You can't punch the spine. You cannot punch above the shoulders? Or you can't elbow strike the spine. There's some weird rules. We were talking about this yesterday. Jamie and I looked up. Jamie said they came up with some new rules.

And one of them involves knees to the head to a downed opponent. Now a downed opponent means you have to have both hands down on the mat. And your palm has to be flat. You can't have just one. If you have one hand up, they can knee you in the face. So that's not a downed opponent. Because there's a lot of people that are criticizing this downed opponent thing. Because people were sort of what they would call gaming the system where you would lean down

you just touch your hand on the ground like as if it's safe and then the guy can't hit you so that's how you're you're getting out of exchanging got it instead of you're totally capable of standing up or totally capable of covering up like you can make your choice like you got to this position or he got you to this position. It's advantageous for him. It feels like a fairly standard position. It happens all the time. But the issue becomes, if you are incapable of getting out of the way,

should you be able to knee a guy in the head? Because some guys, when they're down like that, it's like, whoa, that's a devastating maneuver to knee a guy in the head when they're in that position. For good reason. They wanted to decide when it should be legal because there's other organizations where you could do crazy stuff like stomping people. You can stomp people, like stomp their head in certain organizations.

That was a big one in Pride. You could soccer kick guys and stomp them. But oddly enough, they didn't allow elbows on the ground. That's odd. They felt elbows on the ground were's they felt elbows in the ground were barbaric or something they they had a line yeah that's that's everybody's good people are so crazy with their lines that they draw can i pee real quick fuck yeah it's the jail right part where i have to go to the bathroom you're drinking that delicious pellegrino yeah i got into bubbly

water lately jamie i hate to admit it i I like sparkling water now. I just think there's no nutritional benefits. I had it in my head that regular water was better for you. Was that your thing? The Keepers of the Ark of the Covenant, I found. I looked up. I found something where it said that there was a report of one of them having milky

cataracts in a description, but it's not all of them from what i'm reading god damn it graham hancock christians in ethiopia have long claimed to have the ark of the covenant our reporter investigated go down to the very last chapter or the very last paragraph rather see what the fuck they said yeah see that's the thing about these things the final moments of any search i could not judge whether the ark of the covenant truly rested inside the nondescript chapel perhaps manelik manelik's traveling companions did take it and spirited home to ethiopia perhaps its origins here stem from the tail spun by so

nothing he's got no evidence. Yeah, there's apparently also a storm and leaky roof that was going to make them move it in 2012, but I didn't find anything that said that, whether it was seen or not. And that the battery, the Baghdad battery was supposedly also not a battery.

They think it was used for electroplating statues with gold and silver. Oh, that makes sense. So there was a little bit of a charge in there, but not enough to be... Considered a battery. Power or something, yeah. Oh, so it was just a way they kind of made paint. Yeah, sort of.

They would cover stuff. So I think the hypothesis is they would spin it in there and it would create a bond to the stone or whatever they were... That makes sense. So that's the way they would use it on statues and stuff? That's fucking amazing. Goddamn. It's so cool when you think of how these people had to use their little monkey brains

to invent the first wheel or to invent pottery. Like the people that... I mean, when did they figure out pottery? If you had to guess, let's guess. What do you think? 5,000 BC? Not far after fire.

Not far after fire? They just figured out, they could harden stuff? Yeah, stuff probably just accidentally got hardened. Let's Google it. I say 5,000 BC. No, that doesn't make any sense because Qumran, or not Qumran, Sumer. Sumer was before that.

6,000 and 4,000. This is a potter's wheel though. Oh, okay. This potter's wheel was invented in Mesopotamia sometime in between 6,000 and 4,000 does that say 4,000 BC? Ubaid period. You guys going over ancient inventions?

What's going on? We're trying to figure out when they invented pottery. Oh, that has to have been a long ass time ago. We were looking at the Baghdad battery that we were looking at earlier. Apparently, Jamie found out that it might have been used to electroplate gold. Like that it created a small charge, but really wasn't a battery. It was just used to make almost like electric paint. And then we're trying to figure out, well was like how fucking cool is that like how how crazy were the first people the first monkey people from like a million years ago wherever i

was it figured out how to make a flint knife you know and then the first people that figured out pottery they figured out how to roll dirt and light it on fire there's a cool duncan brought up his last appearance not his most recent one there's a cool youtube channel of a guy that does this he makes tons of different experiments and trying out primitive technologies and processes he doesn't talk at all i'm going to look it up so i can find out what it's called but he just made a really cool one where he pulled little pieces of metal out of iron ore. And he invented this way to get his flame hotter using some sort of thing. And he shows you he makes the whole thing.

Wow. It's really, really cool. I'll show you. It's just amazing when you think of how long ago it was. We don't even know what it was. It's someone first invented pottery. That potter's wheel was at least 6,000 or at least 4,000 B 000 bc there's also the idea that people invented it and just never got out before that you know what i mean 2 000 years earlier maybe somebody invents it and then he just never no one ever

leaves that village yeah that definitely could be it so what is this gentleman doing primitive technology is the youtube channel so it shows them him he's making a forge blower. What's funny is he has cave hands. You know what I mean? He looks like the original. This dude is one of, there's a bunch of people now that are experts in ancient ways of living. Like ancient archery and ancient house building and shit. It's really weird. Well, building and shit. It's really weird.

Well, there's something that I was going to say. You meditate at all? Yeah. Well, sort of. In the tank, I do. So I went on a seven day silent meditation retreat. Whoa. Yeah. It's no talking for seven no talk well it ended up being

like we talked uh for three minutes starting day three we'd talk for three minutes a day whoa on day three but i gotta say it was at on the first day i'm not kidding i fucking cried oh my god because dude no talking no television no computer no phone what here's the worst part no reading no writing what just meditating and like eating and whatever and being like being in this village thing whoa um but uh this video is fucking really cool this video is dope as fuck. This guy made these, he made like a little furnace blower out of this pottery thing

with a wheel inside of it that he would spin and it would blow air onto this fire. Yeah, it's like he got like a handmade fan and he does it by moving it around with his fingers. And now he's like making a rope and a twine so he could pull it probably like a bow yeah and what he's been able to do with it is stoke this fire up in this incredible way i mean it's just blazing and it's all from the wind that he's blowing into it with with this crazy. And this is some shit that people did thousands of years ago or something?

Yeah. It's cool to watch him problem solve all these things. He just keeps happening. His first early videos, he makes this hut that's behind him. And it's just out of nowhere. He's just in the middle of the forest. And he makes these little bricks. And he heats them up in a kiln he made.

And he started with no fire. And he's built all this stuff. It's pretty cool to watch. This is wild, though. He's doing it all with clay and shit. There's a bunch. Oh, it's diarrhea. What is that?

Don't eat that. What the fuck is he making, man? He's getting the carbon and putting it in with the iron ore. And he puts it in the kiln. Oh, that's right. He's going to make metal? Yeah. Yeah.

This is insane. This is insane. This is insane. Is he making coal? What's he making? Yeah. He's going to make metal. This is how people did it, man. That's what's really crazy.

Someone had to figure out how to take all the elements that are involved in metal. The camera's about to catch on fire. I know, right? This is wild. That looks like fake fire. It does. Looks like some CGI fire. This is all CIA bullshit.

This is preparing us for the zombie apocalypse. They're teaching us when the grid goes down how to make our own fire. Yeah, so silent meditation retreat so wake up at uh so day one i cried cried straight up cried wow from like it's it feels like you're dead you can't talk to anyone you know whoa and you can't get online you can't read you can't you literally are like a apparition You're just walking around like a ghost. But day three and four were two of the best days of my life. Really? Yeah, because all you're doing is meditating,

and meditation brings on, just stimulates your brain, makes you happy. Like proven. Like monks take MRIs and they just look like they, they don't stress. They have high, uh, incredibly low levels of cortisol and very high levels of, of, uh, of positive, uh, chemicals. Um, so you just, I would meditate nine hours a day and yeah. And you just end up like, and the other thing I would do because I couldn't, uh, no one could talk and I didn't really need to talk to anybody. I would smile all day. So if you smile all day, it tricks your brain into thinking you're happy.

Because your brain doesn't know. Like if your muscles are just, they go, oh, I guess we're happy. So everybody act happy. It can work backwards. The guy named Paul Eichmann wrote a book. But it was, yeah but it was yeah it was an amazing experience amazing and what i realized is i came away with like i'm so overstimulated at home with podcasts television shows computers fucking phones texting constantly that it's

made me uh really cut back on everything in a way that's very, very positive, I think. Wow. Yeah. Because, dude, I wake up, I don't, most people wake up and you immediately like mainline information or technology. Right. Like I used to do when I smoked cigarettes, I would wake up and have four cigarettes and drink coffee and just like shock my body.

And I feel like I really would, it's awful. And I feel like that's what I do now all right what i used to do with technology just like constantly turn my phone on text go on new york times go on this thing go on go on reddit go on all these places and it wasn't making it was just stressing me out yeah it doesn't make you feel good yeah but that's hard isn't that weird yeah this thing that we all do constantly we, like, it doesn't make me feel good. Yeah. We need discipline. Yeah.

That's a big factor in managing the electronic world, is discipline. The discipline to not watch too much television. Yep. The discipline to not fuck around on your phone too much. The discipline to not play games too much. Mm-hmm. You can get lurched in. Yeah.

Is that a word? Lurchedurched sure we know what you meant it's not really the right word uh it's it's probably not ultimately beneficial right i mean like certain amount of access to it is really good yeah but it's so addictive we should have like one person like a responsible guy like will you look up like the world should have that where it's like hey look up when when so and so was invented but for the most part we can just communicate because that's the thing that's another one of those things where you talk about what because i i look up what actually makes people happy communication uh real connection Real connection Community Volunteering

Makes people happier Which I'm like in the Big Brothers program And it's like it's not bad It hasn't given me a spike or anything A spike? Of adrenaline Or of good feelings Not even adrenaline

Of like serotonin But really connecting with people is that maybe what you like about doing the show because i always find that i enjoy doing this show and people are like it's so long i'm like yeah i know it's long but i don't know there's something about just like sitting here and just like staring at each other and like what else do you think do you think that here's what i think yeah? Well, and there's something about it for listeners probably too. Yeah, well It's so long form that you get everybody gets real relaxed. Yeah, and you get to it becomes more of The way I listen to it like a lot of guys do it this way now

Ari does it this way a lot of guys do it. They just let it go as long as it goes yeah And when you do that like conversations they evolve they they move around they they they get deeper Ari does it this way. A lot of guys do it. They just let it go as long as it goes. Yeah. And when you do that, like, conversations, they evolve. They move around. They get deeper. They get lighter. They get silly. Yeah.

There's no, it's not organized. And I like listening to people talk. Yeah. Well, you like ideas. Yeah. So you like to hear, like, what's your idea? That's not a good idea. Or that is a good idea. That is a good idea.

Yeah. You got to be super flexible with your ideas. I've gotten way better at that since I started doing a podcast. Way better at trying to figure out like, what is it about an idea that I disagree with? And how much of it is that I had a different idea than that idea in my head? Yeah. A preconceived notion. How much of that is how I'm affected by the disagreement or the-

It's called motivated reasoning. Yeah. That's a perfect way of describing it. That's exactly what it is, right? That's super common, man, for all of us. And I think that having conversations on a podcast with a variety of different people that have a variety of different opinions has been really interesting because I get to challenge my own opinions.

Like, well, where are my opinions coming from? Yeah. Have they been really vetted out? Yeah. Or are they just some like convenient stuff that I've held on to? Yeah.

Well, yeah, you have the shelving built. You have all the shit you have like, Hey, I got the t-shirt. I got the old thing. I got the right adapter. I don't want to get it. That's exactly right. Yeah. Yeah. you have like yeah, I got the t-shirt. I got the old thing. I got the right adapter

I don't want exactly right. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah But yet so it is this this that was what I learned like The the walking around not having to talk to people. Yeah was cool in that there was no pressure And it was also like the least sexual environment I've ever been in because everyone just looks like they have the flu, basically. People are struggling. Did they have rules? Could people hook up?

It was discouraged. I also would say, like, everyone, I didn't have a roommate, but like, you're in like Olympic-style dorms, like where you have a roommate and there's like eight rooms on each floor. It was like a summer camp, basically, where you have a roommate and there's like eight rooms on each floor it was like a summer camp basically where you did nothing it seriously would be kind of hot though it would having been there gal both single yeah both can't talk yeah having been there though it runs counter to what you're going for you're like really it's fucking interesting where you go like you really see what's inside

because i was trying to think of what it was like like i was like basketball camp was like no basketball camp we had tv vcrs and talked the entire time uh this was like nothing it's like nothing you've ever done uh you and then we would talk and then they would do a talk every night about some theme some buddhist theme and then the next day you would you a talk every night about some theme, some Buddhist theme. And then the next day you would talk in a group about that. And what I found was I didn't even really want to talk. It's like, fuck it. I've come this far.

Let me see how long I can not. Let me just see what. But you see what's in there. And you see what your brain does. You see what you're interested in. You see what you remember. Any recall? My recall was really good because your brains what i realized with the with the all the technology is you i would create chaos in my head uh with so many voices and sounds and noises that i couldn't even i couldn't remember remember shit. Cause it was like, I can't even get back there. I can't even get through all this garbage to like the file that I'm looking for.

Um, so if I couldn't remember something, I'd be like, just hang out. It'll come. And it would always come. Um, but that was the, the thing of like, I don't listen to the radio when I'm in my car now, which is odd. So I just drive like a fucking old man. Whoa. Just literally just me and fucking me in silence.

Just to limit the amount of signals. Yeah. And it's not easy, but yeah. I got a buddy of mine who lives in Australia, rather. I want to say Alaska. He lives in Australia, and he takes these trips out to the bush where he goes out camping, and he'll be gone for like eight nine days where he won't see people for like nine days and he said that when he comes back oftentimes it feels

really weird to talk to people like almost like forgot how to talk to people where it's been nothing but him alone with his thoughts with no cell phone service for like eight or nine days yeah it's really worthwhile. Because what I also realized is that I was like, with all the signal and all the noise and everything, is I was upsetting myself. Do you know what I mean? It's like, no, I don't need this much. And I would just overload myself.

Like, no, we're in the golden age of information and I can access any fucking video and look at the Godfather and fucking Scarface and all this shit. And it's like, no, you need to slow down, man. Like that's not, that's kind of my temperament. But at the same time, my nervous system was like screaming. Like you gotta chill out.

Wow. Yeah. But I don't smoke weed or anything like that so i don't have any way to to separate yeah or to like to quiet my nervous system i mean i have antidepressants stuff like that or but but meditation really helps and since i've been back i've meditated pretty much every day since which is really for like three months which is really i've missed a few days but it's definitely like an entrenched part of my life now that I miss if I don't do it. Time for reflection is very important to avoid getting stuck with momentum, right?

When you have the momentum of your life and you just kind of let things keep playing out and just adjusting along the fly, that separation to step back and look at it. It's so critical. It's so important. And it's so hard to do. Because I think once things start going in your life, whether it's obligations or financial responsibilities. Whatever things that you're working on that are occupying all of your time. They become so much a part of your thought process and you consider them to

be like of primary importance because this is like i have to pay these bills hey this i have to deal with this shit i have to this is what's going on that they they sort of overwhelm cognitive reasoning they overwhelm perspective where you don't have the opportunity to step back and go hey you're not here for that long Yeah, amount of time here. Yeah, that's what it was like. Oh, so I died Like what was this like it was a bit like the Mark Twain thing like of like seeing your own funeral of like oh Wow, I was away for a week I got I had the automatic email thing and I knew so people knew i wasn't around but i

only got like 50 emails it wasn't like an ungodly amount of emails right uh i got maybe 10 texts which is all manageable you know like it's not like oh i was i was so missed the world needs me it's like no we can all duck out obama can duck out. Obama's in Martha's Vineyard right now. He's reachable, but he's not like working, working. When he does that, like how much do you think he works while he's doing one of those trips like that? I'm gonna

bet three hours. Three hours. Yeah. I bet in the morning and then again in the afternoon. Is that just a random guess? That's completely uneducated. It's based on fucking nothing. I think people are going to miss that guy so much. Oh. They're going to miss that guy so much.

You can't even quantify how much they're going to miss him. He kept it together in the face of overwhelming criticism, which is really interesting. The way he handled it without a hint of bitterness or anger. He's a fascinating guy in that way. He's a very, very measured guy. Yeah. He's nothing if not measured. He's half everything. Yeah. And I think one of the good things about having a guy like that, one of the most important things, you can criticize him, you're with him, you're not with him, But having a guy like that sets the tone for the way we think about ourselves.

And he was a nice guy. He was an articulate guy. He was warm and friendly. I believed him. Yeah. That's the tone. Whether or not he was really like that 24-7, I don't fucking know, man. It seems like he was.

But he's setting the tone with his behavior like yeah that's what what people are most terrified of by something like trump becoming president they're worried that there's a lot of people that are like super aggressive yeah and that like that having a like an insulting president who yeah i'm i'm thinking about whether i agree with you about whether obama raised the discourse because it got coarser and he got yelled at and you lie and all that stuff he made people worse in some ways toward him uh how much and talk radio and internet and talk radio got worse in the last eight years which could just be natural it may have been worse without him yeah

yeah it's not as simple because it is like it did get worse but i think the thing that you said it's really worthwhile is like the level-headedness of that dude yeah and like a really measured kind-hearted guy see it's hard for me to discern how much of the hate he gets is from his policy from where the just the current state of the united states is yeah in the eyes of ourselves the world financially resources jobs all that stuff and then how much of that how much of it is racism yeah how much of it is um how much of it is racism? Yeah. How much of it is, how much of it is legitimate criticism that makes sense? How much of it is,

you know, this criticism that he's always had that by trying to be accommodating to everybody, he really gets nothing done. Yeah. You know, I don't know. I don't understand it.

It's, it's, it's way too complicated for me to dive into. The hatred thing that I point out always is I think it's probably half 50% racism and 50% Republicans fucking hate Democrats. They fucking hate them. And they, so that's two presidents in a row that they've said were not legitimate.

It's so crazy. Cause they did the same thing with Clinton where they tried to indict him pretty much from day one and investigate the fuck out of him and his wife. Well, do you remember that? I should say Republicansans versus i should say republican uh politicians because i can't say you know i can't speak for all people sorry donald trump is a birther oh right no i know he was the big he was the big proponent of it yeah he was saying he's from kenya yeah yeah he's and he's only down by three.

I mean, he kept saying it too. He kept going all in. Remember they released the birth certificate and everything? Like this is a forgery. It's a goddamn forgery. Yeah. He had all these reasons

to believe it's a forgery. Yeah. He has people in Hawaii investigating. How hilarious is it though that people would be worried if he wasn't born in the right spot uh well that speaks

to people's uh movie suspicion they want to believe that there's a manchurian candidate there's a pod and there's a cell here he hates america yeah neil brennan yeah as jesus is my witness he hates america and it the Second Amendment to be abolished. Yes, and it feels good to play the victim. That's the thing people also forget. It's like, no, it feels fucking really good to go like, he's out to get us and he doesn't believe what I believe. It's like, no, he's a fucking boring ass.

I believe he may be an atheist, but I think that's the worst thing you say about him religiously. Otherwise, he's Christian, at least. So the idea that if he's a Muslim, he's an awful Muslim. Just get a feed of bacon and see what happens. Yeah, I'm sure. Yeah, exactly. It's like bring garlic to the vampire house. That's right.

I don't know, man. I don't think anybody's ever going to be able to do that job. I think that job is a ridiculous job. And I think that at the very least, he moved some social issues in a way. Like during his time, I feel like people were more tolerant in a lot of ways. Like it opened up a lot of social issues that I don't think would have been addressed with a less measured more uh easily accessible well he truly is like progressive where it's like yeah like i'm a progressive politician so i want things to evolve but then there's like the fucking ed snowden shit

well that's the thing it's he's super authoritarian and some with drones and snowden shit like that leaks they were worse about leaks than bush was yeah but here's the thing it's he's super authoritarian and some with drones and snow and shit like that leaks they were worse about leaks than bush was yeah but here's the thing about drones right was that happening anyway was that just gonna happen anyway and is is it because he's in office i mean how much of effect does he have on what the heads of military decide to do and not do with things like drones. How much of an effect do you think like personally he has on that? I feel like a lot. You think so? Did you watch the,

the, the CIA thing on a Showtime? What thing was that? It was like the last seven heads of the CIA. They documentary about them. No. It's fucking good, but it talks about,

yeah, it's like seven or eight. Michael Hayden, a bunch of them, these guys fucking good. No, but it talks about yeah, it's like seven or eight Michael Hayden a bunch of these guys And and they talk about having Leon Panetta They talk about having having a guy in sight on video live and having to decide whether it's Go time Jesus Christ. Oh Masters yeah whether it's go time. Jesus Christ. Oh, is this on? The Spymasters.

Yeah, it's on Showtime, yeah. CIA and the Crosshairs. Wow. Yeah. It's good, huh? Yeah, really good. Crazy job, man. It's super duper, like, you know, right-wingy.

It's like, it is very pro-death and pro, you know, pro-fire, fire, fire all weapons. We got the weapons, let's use them type thing. It's interesting that everybody pretty much that's involved at the highest level in military is, I mean, there's a giant percentage of them that are probably conservative, right? Am I right in guessing that? I think so.

I feel like it's 80%, even though I'm making that up. Yeah, I would say I agree with your made-up quote. Thank you. It's a good number. I would agree with that. Don't you think? Here's an interesting one. What percentage of merchandise do women buy in America?

Percentage of all merchandise in America. 40%? 80%. Oh, my God. Isn't that fucking insane? That's amazing. Yeah. Wow.

80% of merchandise is purchased by women. Ooh. Wow. I don't even know what, I've known that for months now and I still don't know what to make of it. That's incredible. Yeah. I just Googled it, it said 85%.

Oh my God, they're winning. Yeah, it can't be as high as 85%. They're winning. Yeah. that said 85%. Oh my God, it can't be as high as 85%. They're winning. Yeah.

But they market, I guess they market to men to get their women to say, hey, buy this for me. I don't know what. Because men wouldn't, what do men buy? Like video games, deodorant?

Yeah, shoes. Yeah, shoes. Jamie's really into shoes. Wow, that's a big number, man. That's a big fucking number. That seems like almost, like it's trying to, in some way, replicate something that exists in the wild. This is a great Joe Rogan tangent. Go on.

You know what I'm saying? This is a classic Rogan. Why are the numbers so strongly in the camp of women buying shit? Why? It's got to come from the gatherer thing. Yeah, it's got to come from the gatherer thing. so strongly in the camp of women buying shit. Why? What is, it's gotta come from the gatherer thing. Yeah. It's gotta come from the gatherer thing. They want to collect stuff.

Yeah. It's like the same leftover echoing urge that made them pick wild apricots. Yeah. And we want to go and hunt. I bet percentage of men hunting is at least 80. Yeah. There's a lot of men um i don't know what the number of women would be go there's a bunch of women to do it but a lot of women do it and and they turn it into a career how come because if you can be like a personality a hunting personality and you're a woman that's like a legitimate career

path like there's a bunch of decent looking and you can shoot yeah that's for the bow yeah yeah yeah yeah and um it also allows men and women to watch their hunting shows together okay i like when the girl wins she's always right yeah It says the same thing for motorsports. It says, they agree that women racers bring fans out to the game. 74% of males and 62% of females agree that. Women racers bring fans out to the games. Hmm.

Interesting. Well, that's some underdog shit, I think. It's the woman among the, I mean, I think it's like. Right. The girls who race in NASCAR. mean, I think it's like... Right. The girls who race in NASCAR. What's her name? Danica Patrick.

They go like, Danica Patrick is so hot. And you're like, ah, she's all right. She's like a... You know. We'll give her a six and a half, seven out of ten. That's hilarious. Yeah, like I can't say that she is like a, you know, but it is definitely like more. It's the thing that you notice.

Yeah, it's super odd, right? It's super odd for a woman to want to do that. Yeah. But normal. I mean, there's nothing wrong with it. But for a woman to want to race like Formula One or something like that. Oh, there's a, there's, ooh, she's great looking. It's a pretty gal.

Mary Defoe. I like how you say that the right way. Ugh. She's Miss Hawaiian Tropic. Oh, see, these are all race car drivers? These women? Jesus. Wow.

That's gangster. Courtney Forrest. It's a good name. That sounds so porn. Yeah. Danny, all right, that's a good picture but you have to be like a wild person to be a race car driver go on do you think it's a characterological thing i wonder it's so risky and it's so rewarding i would guess in a sense of like a sensory perception

sense yeah like the sensory perception sense. Yeah Well, yeah, you want to talk about upsetting your nervous system? Yeah Yeah, and the consequences are terrible if you fuck up, you know car accidents at 150 miles an hour are not cute Yeah, instant horrific too when you see people get spun around they could fucking crash and fire Yeah, fired. Yeah, and it explodes like flex. And you're like, was that a foot I just saw? Dude. But having said that, high rate of mortality. I'm sorry, low rate of mortality.

They actually survive way more than you think. Where you go, oh, that's another one of those. Like, dead. Dead. You're dead. Those people are dead, and they're fine yeah have you been seeing these people that put these balloons around their bodies and get hit by bowls i haven't we gotta show you this i'm looking forward to it very much this is a recurring

theme on this show it's almost like one of those uh top 40 uh morning radio zoo shows where they have those uh weekly gags on they have those weekly gags. One of our weekly gags is, show one of the guests the people with the balloons on that get hit by the bulls. And this is my take on it. I don't think people realize how vulnerable they are. This is a, oh, this is a different one. Oh, okay, cool.

This is a different one. And look, they got a rodeo clown and everything. They're trying to rope, oh, this guy, the bull, he's going after the guy. Get out of there. look they got a rodeo clown and everything they're trying to rope oh this guy the bull he's going after the guy get out of there he doesn't have a suit on oh he got flipped

oh he got jacked son oh my god this is even more horrific so this was this is obviously something went wrong because the bulls are they still seem pretty happy to be in there

they're not leaving oh my god the guys who are willing I seem pretty happy to be in there. They're not leaving. Oh my god. The guys who are willing I like that it's interesting about it's an interesting metaphor about bulls and a temper tantrum. They go after the guy even though they're just mad that their balls are tied up.

But they're like well fuck it. I'm in a bad mood anyway this is the better one this is the one that we were talking about this one looks like it's first of all definitely looks like it's taking place in Mexico right

second of all these cushions these guys have they're just not big enough they only go from the waist up yeah you want to cover your dick I think that's a fuck yeah yeah you're gonna see some carnage watch this They only go from the waist up. Yeah, you want to cover your dick, I think. Fuck, yeah. Yeah, you're going to see some carnage. Watch this.

Because the bull gets loose. And when the bull gets loose, these fuckers in this thing, I think they just have this stupid plan that they're going to be fine. You got to back it up a little. Because the guy already got jacked. I think that's this guy right here. Yeah, but he got jacked before that. Right there. Boom.

So they let the bull out. The bull sees these assholes walking around with these giant jellyfish balloons. Look at them. Boom. I mean, he goes flying. He gets gored on the ground. He gets run over. I mean, this guy gets fucking jacked.

They never really fuck with the horses, though, huh? No, they don't fuck with horses. Even the bulls know, like, I don't want to fuck with that. Well, they don't, I think they don't seem to think that the horses do anything. They think people are cunts. Oh, they just don't like people, right? Yeah, I think

because of the bull stuff. Come on, cow. I think cows have always realized that people want to eat them. Look at that. Boom. Boom. I mean, if a cow sees a person, what are the odds that that's going to be a bad thing? The odds are pretty goddamn strong.

Yeah, nothing good's going to happen. Like, oh, good. They might squeeze your tits for a couple years and then shoot you in the head. At best. But for sure, one day they're going to shoot you in the head. Do you think it's naturally ingrained, though? I don't think Calaceous is like an enemy. And you can't pass that on genetically, I don't think.

Do you know what a scrub bull is? No, tell me. Scrub bull are animals that, until the last X amount of years, used to be domestic cattle but then they get loose and they live in the countryside and this this is something that happens often in australia where they're not necessarily like the same strain anymore as like a strain of cattle that you would use for like beef or you know like that you would bring to market they have different uh they have different genetics now because they've they've been wild that you would use for beef or that you would bring to market,

they have different genetics now because they've been wild for so long and they're not like an Angus cow. So if you have Angus cows and this thing shows up and starts fucking your cattle, you've got a problem. You've got some weird crossbreed of a cow that might not be the best for eating. Right. But these things things they live wild in the bush in australia and in australia there's no predators they have like you know small things like dingoes and stuff like that but yeah they're never taking out a bull there's they

would need a lion or something like that to kill one of these things and they get cool looking like they look different they don't look like a cow anymore they start looking more and more primitive in some weird way they start looking more like like a animal that you would see in africa or something it's really fascinating man like here's some of the photos like look at that that's it looks like africa a long time ago yeah that's a different animal but if you just google scrub bull, is that what it is? Okay, like that one in the upper left-hand corner is a perfect example. Like that is not really, obviously that's a cow, right?

That's a bull. But that looks way different than the average bull that you see either at the rodeo. I'm looking at his balls back there, right? Huge balls, son. Is that what I'm looking at, Joe? That's a package, son. Good for them. Huge balls, giant antlers,

or horns, rather. And his face and just the way his body's built, it's different. He's a wild animal. And he's living the way they're supposed to be. And that's why he looks like a wild animal. And you know what else? He's fine.

He's doing great. They're super aggressive, though. They're some of the most dangerous things to run across if you're out in the bush, as it were. Oh, I don't see what you mean. That's another one of the most dangerous things. What is that? It's a buffalo.

I don't know if that's... Will they ram cars? Oh, yeah. Hey, has there been a lot of animal chasing? You saw the tiger eating the lady last week. Yeah, in Beijing. That was pretty wild. But a lot of animal chasing you saw the tiger eating the lady last week in beijing that was pretty wild but a lot of like giraffes chasing cars and shit have you seen some of these videos no look giraffe look up giraffe chases uh chases listen it only makes sense hauling ass by the way it only makes sense sense. Yeah, they're tired and like Here you go. Oh

I've seen this. Yeah, that is crazy. Look at the strides on this motherfucker. I know they're shitting their pants Look at it running behind them, you know, they would hit you with their head. Yeah. Oh my god, look it's right behind you It's like you were saying about the neck whip thing whip things oh my god this is terrifying i think he comes around the corner again i think he does i don't know if this is the right one oh my god what do you think it would do to those people just start smacking them with the t? Yeah, whip his neck at them. It's really dangerous. You got to think of how big his head is, man. Have you ever seen them fight?

So cool. Yeah. It's really painful. I mean, in terms of animal shit, that's one of those things where you're like, I don't know, guys. It is one of the weirdest. I don't mind biting, but that's like really fucking odd it's one of the weirdest it's one of the weirdest and you want to talk about a concussion oh yeah like they must just be evolved or have really small brains or very tightly packed brains well you know sheep

can slam into each other like super hard but their brains are literally connected to their head different than ours are they're like they've evolved to absorbed impact yeah i would assume rams are too yeah yeah that's that's insane those wild desert like bighorn sheep like look at these things oh my god this is crazy like what a strange trait to develop to have neck fighting they're fighting like two snakes oh my god they beat the fuck out of each other too see if you can find uh a good video of uh bighorn sheep headbutting each other because these fucking things they have these giant like battering rams that grow out of their heads and they like raise up and crash into each other and the sound sounds like a rifle going off yeah and they do it in the

mountains oh these things these fucking things look at that antlers on that thing. Look at this. Boom! Jesus! Boom! Oh my god! Yeah, we don't have to listen to what that guy's saying. He's just talking about snow on the ground and these sheep are going after it. It's crazy how hard they headbutt each other.

Boom. Is that what the audio was from or was it from something else? No, it was from that. It's weird audio. But they evolved to do this. It's just such a strange trait. Look at this.

Oh, my God. Play that back. Yeah. That's a rifle. Such a strange trait. Look at this. Oh my god, play that back! Yeah. That's a rifle! Oh, they're getting rid of the fuck, I think. Boy, they're so weird. These things are straight out of Star Wars. They really are. Yeah.

I mean, look at this fucking animal. Any kind of natural defense is always interesting. A shell or a horn. Yeah. These things are dope as fuck, man. You know, they have brought them back to a lot of environments now. They've transplanted them all throughout the West. It's kind of interesting.

They brought them to a bunch of different states. They took viable males and females and they installed them in these areas and monitored their growth. Are they indigenous to the states? They used to be. Yes, they are. But they used to be in more areas. They used to have a wider territory.

But what happened was, I guess, after World War, or after the Civil War, rather, there were a bunch of people that were market hunters. And, rather, there were a bunch of people that were market hunters. And, you know, the same type of people that shot all the buffalo for the hides and all that jazz. They did that with a lot of animals all throughout the entire West. And they, you know, potentially wiped out or got close to having them wiped out, like, a bunch of different big game species, like elk and deer.

And it took a while to bring all those things back so what a lot of these uh conservation organizations are doing is like taking these things and dropping them off into the mountain some places then monitoring them and making sure their populations survive but it's it's it's a fucking way too cool of an animal to not figure out how to bring back you gotta bring it back dude i've seen them in the wild they are fucking cool they're cool and they seem like their nature is okay despite the headbutting oh no they're just chilling they just don't want that dude to fuck their girls yeah it's like come on bro so yeah we understand it yeah as far as like violence goes it's like

probably like the nicest violence i mean to us it would suck if they head butted us, but it doesn't seem to bother them But I also would promise you that NFL players watch that and they're like yeah We get after that. Yeah, like it before games and shit Maybe if NFL players have to evolve to develop. Yeah, no connection to their brain like a Rams. Yeah They need to heart. I think it's going to be a while. It's going to take a few decades. You hearing that helicopter by the way, still,

still going on. There was some sort of a gas leak a few miles away. Some shit went down. Still going down. Still going down. Um, yeah. Um,

watching those things headbutt each other may just makes you weirded out as to how the different ways that things evolve, but they're all a kind of life. Like how strong the difference is between an octopus that can get out of the hole the size of a quarter and squeeze its whole body through, and that thing that slams its head into one of the other competing males, raises up on its back legs and comes crashing forward. And they don't even budge, man. Yeah. They collide with each other. It sounds like a gun went off and they just stare at each other. They're like, okay.

Such a cool animal. They have giant nuts. Huge. This is based on firsthand observation? Yeah, yeah, yeah. It was pointed out to me by this guy, Steve Rinella. It's amazing. You know when you you think i don't

see a lot of dicks day to day you see so many dicks like on animals and dogs it's crazy yeah and we just like are fine with animal dicks it's true but human dicks we are we have laws about but we are living in a in a in a playground of fucking animal cock well you know what i think i think people are supposed to live um i think like naturally like what we're inclined to live we're inclined to live in a place where you don't need to do anything as far as clothing if you go back to like the people that are the indigenous people in the amazon that are chilling and drinking ayahuasca and going fishing and growing their own vegetables they're basically naked yeah right they've probably been own vegetables, they're basically naked.

Yeah. Right? They've probably been like that forever. They're walking around barefoot. I think as soon as you put on clothes, as soon as you can manipulate your environment and live in a spot where you normally wouldn't be able to live, but you figured out fire.

Like, say, Phoenix. Oh, yeah. Perfect example. Yeah. Perfect example. My friend Mike Goldberg lives out there and he likes it. He goes from one air-conditioned room

to another air-conditioned room. Workout in an air-conditioned gym. Go home to an air-conditioned house. Most cities in America are either way too... How do you put up with this cold or how do you put up with this heat? I wonder if that could adversely affect your health if you're only breathing air-conditioned the time oh yeah like mortality rates yeah i wonder probably

not though because old people go to florida and into like they go to it yeah they thrive it seems to put a couple of years on them yeah i think struggling with your environment, yeah. Yeah, people are less likely to die of, I think, I can fuck with heat. I could take Phoenix way over like Minnesota. Yeah, a lot of people feel that way. Like the negative aspects of heat is you just have to turn the air conditioning. Yeah. The negative aspects of that cold is like nothing's happening. You might get shut down.

The fucking power might go out. You might have to light your couch on fire to stay alive yes whereas i feel like i could withstand yeah 130 degrees if i had water uh-huh right yeah like here here's all that you would have to have you'd have to have two things happen at the same time a pandemic epidemic as far as like a disease and power going out you'd have to have those two things happen in the winter and you the the people that are supposed to turn the power back on they're not going to go to work there's a fuck there's some kind of an evil flu if you get near people and they sneeze on you you're going to be dead within 24 hours like that's all possible yeah that can happen

and if that does happen and the the power grid stays down during the winter in some place and they can't figure out how to get people to go out there and fix it. Yeah, whereas what's the stats on heat? Can you look up the stats on heat? It's so hot when the air conditioning doesn't work. It's true. After five hours. It's fine, man.

It's fine. It's true. Oh, no, you're 100% right. So hot. But you can sit in the shade. You can lay in the pool you can sweat 80 yep you can sweat you sweat it's a natural thing there's no you have no natural defenses against cold sound like a pussy jamie you know what you sound like jamie sound like a no good pussy i

went through a week with with uh no power in the middle of like an ice storm and like we survived it you got i mean you can put on layers and get warm you can you can start a fire if you want to get cold you you can't get cold once it's 100 i've seen that argument my buddy has that argument it's uh it makes sense but i don't i don't mind super duper hotness though i just don't mind it like i my body likes it better do they yeah well i think everybody's body is certainly different. I mean, you'd have to wonder if they believe that there's certain people that have diets that would better suit them because their ancestors came from a certain part of the world.

Like, that's a theory. I think that kind of makes sense that people would have different temperature requirements as well. You know, what makes them feel like it works yeah i i think it stands to reason it's like i don't have good circulation i just think that people in being able to manipulate the environment the way we can we we will there's too many of us we couldn't stay in all the good spots we can't all just live in costa rica san diego yeah exactly in fact people don't even really want to live in San Diego, and it's there now. San Diego is here. Yeah, but San Diego is amazing.

No, I know, but they still are like, it's perfect climate, and people are like, no. I would even say San Diego is not warm enough for me. Really? I like LA heat. Wow. Yeah. You know what? There's a lot of cool people in San Diego.

I've always enjoyed hanging out with people in san diego i think it's a it's an interesting combination between like military and like surfers yeah they're not a very stressed out group no san diego people i think it's a really good city man i think it's a really good city i think san diego is like probably one of my favorite definitely one of my favorite cities in california and la Jolla has the most ticklish audiences. Ticklish? That's what I said when it crowds like so good. You're like, oh, you guys are just ticklish. That club is awesome.

Yeah. The La Jolla store. Yeah. I think I'm going to do that the next time I go back there. You should. What do you do? Theaters there? Yeah, I've been doing theaters there.

But I did Laughing Skull in Atlanta last weekend. Oh, yeah. That's really good, huh? It was so fun. Yeah. And it made me think, like, I got to do more little places as well. How'd you end up doing Laughing Skull? Because I wanted to do a small spot. Because I did the Tabernacle there last time I was there.

Yeah. And I want to fuck around and come up with some new stuff. And I've got some stuff I'm working on. And I just knew it would be a real intimate, real tight little crowd. It's only like 80 people. It's so cool. What did you charge? 20 bucks or something?

I don't know. Nothing crazy. Yeah. But it wasn't like $100 ticket gold circles. You know, it's comedy club prices. It's a comedy club. Comedy clubs, they're so important. And a lot of people that get to theaters and they get to that theater stage, they never

want to give back to the comedy clubs. They always have this like weird adversarial relationship with club owners. But I'm always like, look, nobody's perfect here. But if it wasn't for these people that are willing to open a comedy club, crazy assholes like you and me wouldn't have any place to work. Yeah. We're not going to make our own club. Yeah.

Right? Like, guys that are awesome, like Bob Fisher who owns the Ice House. Mm-hmm. Like, he's such a sweetheart of a guy that it doesn't just benefit you to do it because it's a good thing financially to help him and help that club. But you need people like that. Yeah. Like, that's the only way we ever get to work. Yeah. Same with, but you need people like that. Yeah. It's the only way we ever get to work.

Yeah. Same with Comedy and Magic Club. Oh, Mike Lacey. He's the salt of the earth. He's the sweetest guy. He's one of the nicest people that's ever walked the face of this planet. Yeah.

Agreed. Yeah, man. Look, in all this shit, Jamie Masada takes a lot of heat, but think about all the charitable stuff that Jamie Masada's done.ada's absolutely jamie masada's done a lot of great stuff yeah he really has and and he continues to work with a lot of uh underprivileged children and he does a lot of different like i gotta do comedy camp on saturday yeah he's a good dude jamie jamie's a good dude and we need all these folks you know we need all these folks. We need all these folks. And they need us.

But there's something that happens when people, I think definitely happens when you don't get the respect you think that you deserve early on. As comics? Yeah, as a club. Well, yeah, but those offers are pretty like, yeah, $1,500? Like, they're really shitty. Sometimes. And then they go like, like well you haven't done anything it's like the negotiation thing it's hard to forget that shit it is and it does become

this thing of like it forces you as a comic to go like well when i get the chance to fuck you you're gonna get fucked exactly the same way you're fucking me now and they do it to and they fucked pretty much everyone and they they developed this uh connection in their head the club owners that all the club owners are adversarial with each other no with you yeah like this is these they're all your adversary yeah you what you're the comic those the club owners they're trying to fuck you yeah they're all pieces of shit yeah they should give you your fucking money yeah they should be happy you're there yeah opposite sides of the aisle yep absolutely it's like the weirdest relationship but if if there was no comedy clubs dude we do we would be fucked we're so lucky that those goddamn things exploded in the 80s yeah like

when think about like the lenny bruce days when he first started out he used to have to mc yeah they're like five clubs yeah he's like have to go on you do your stand-up in between yeah strippers or fucking yeah or something along those lines yeah like there was no comedy clubs like they that's a really recent thing in terms of like the last hundred years well i was explaining to uh a buddy of mine about the how comedy has become so necessary, and I think it's partially because of the news, in that when the news started,

every news division lost money, but in order to get a license, you had to have a good news division. And then in the 80s, they deregulated it, and then news became a profit center for networks, and good journalism basically went out the window so guys like john stewart and guys like michael moore and guys like chris rock and guys that were like political and had tv shows became almost like the function of um of news programs before this and i was explaining to him he was like oh okay because i was explaining

to someone like how john came how his rise to power and colbert and all these people because there's no alternative right you can't and now the internet you can get at least like reddit or or like there's a lot of shitty websites with like quote-unquote news on them but but for a long time you couldn't get it was just there was a vacuum of like there's no big objective opinion or john oliver on hbo where he'll do these deep dives into because no one else is going to do them because there's no money in them allegedly they'd rather do something sensational uh like the dumbest thing or the most recent dumb thing Trump said. Uh, and there's no, like there's a premium on, on objective truth or at least subject funnily subjective truth.

Joe Rogan, your thoughts. This is a weird time. It's a weird time when it comes to, uh, trying to dis disassemble the way we've got this bizarre system set up, the way we got it structured. Like we're getting older, you know, and as we get older we realize, well, we're just going to pass on this stupid system to the people that are coming next. We haven't fixed anything. That's one of the most disheartening.

Well, the thing is I almost don't even know how to fix the shit. Oh, yeah. Look look it's a real good question yeah but there's an entanglement problem yeah it's like we were talking about earlier when we're talking about different ways that people are making money like there's so much money to be made we were talking about in divorce courts yeah but think about how much money there is to be made in keeping this system of government exactly the same way it is right now. Yeah. There's so many jobs that are dependent upon it.

Like, even if we think that it's a ridiculous idea, we need to abolish the whole thing and start from scratch. What do we do with all those people that are working for it? Well, the other thing I was thinking is people, like, the thing that I do like about the Trump movement is people just going like, no, the system's broken. And it doesn't work for, it doesn't work for it doesn't work for people anymore because everybody's bought and paid for everybody in congress lobbying is pays literally lobbyists write laws so people and people don't like it and they don't know how to stop it right so you've got people i've got a system people go well do you know anyone that you think would run for office no do you know what i

mean and as much as it's like because it's a weird job i don't know anyone who's just like that ideologically driven and could navigate the way it is now so as much as i'm like well they're going to change we're going to shake the system up to what but it's not just that stop and think about what it is it's like to elect a leader for someone to campaign and tell you that they would make the best leader like all throughout history the people that are proclaiming themselves to be the ones that you should follow are almost always the ones you should never follow exactly right so when someone is proclaiming themselves to be capable of leading this land and i am going to be your, and I will take you to the highest heights.

Right, but I don't even think kings needed to do that. Right. They didn't need to bother. Well, I don't think they got a chance to do that. You'd have to kill a king. You'd have to be a usurper. Yeah. But this is essentially the same model, right, that they're doing when they're running for president, even though we know that that's not the kind of personality trait that you would want from a leader you would want someone who's who's not

in any way promoting of themselves yeah a selflessly you want a selfless person who does this thing that's incredibly uh self-interested and they would have to figure out how to fairly monitor this the society that we live in how to fairly when do you decide when you put people in jail when do you decide do we throw all the old rules out and completely look at them all with new facts and new ideas yeah do we just is it like there's a lot of weird drug arguments where there's certain drugs that are illegal that are way more dangerous than certain drugs that are illegal and then you look at this money trail behind all that you're like okay how can you guys still do this yeah like how can you still do this like let's we should make things

legal that the scientists agree should be legal right and then everything else is dangerous we should figure out how to regulate it but you you can't decide like why why is everybody deciding based on ancient information? Right. It doesn't make any sense anymore. Because it's a democratically elected government. But again, it attracts the wrong kinds of people. It's like Churchill or somebody said, it's the best of all the bad systems. Yeah, for sure.

Obama released or exonerated a bunch of drug war victims today. How many was it? Which I thought was really fascinating. I think it's a few hundred. Yeah, I think it's like 300, something like that? Yeah. Which is impressive. Yeah, and you know what I hope he said to them?

Like, if you fuck up, you're fucking me, basically. Who knows what kind of damage is done when someone's in jail for a long period of time the idea that this guy can't vote can't get most jobs right yeah it's like a very very fucked up system

how does that work? are you an ex-felon? if the president writes you clean if you're exonerated, I don't know. Does that make you... I don't know if you're ever pardoned. He's been touched by magic. You've been touched by magic.

The president has magic. He can tell the court that they have to let people out of jail. How old is that wacky idea? That might be the wackiest of all the wacky old shit. Exonerating people like, I'm going to... You can decide that the guy who killed people should get free. Yeah. Because you're the king.

Hankley went free the other day. See that? What? Yeah. What? He's out on the streets, man. He might be listening to us as we speak. What?

John Hankley. The one who shot Reagan? Shot Reagan. Yeah. Holy shit. They let him free? Yeah. They're trying to get Obama killed.

After 35 years. Who was he trying to shoot? Wow. He're trying to get Obama killed. After 35 years. Who was he trying to shoot? Wow. He was trying to impress Jodie Foster. That's right. Message. It turns out you were barking up the wrong tree, friend. She don't like dudes.

Hey, bro. You don't know about that. Actually, she's out. The right guy with the right dick. That's right. I'm sorry. Get a spotlight around. The right lunatic with the right dick.

Brought her back. Brought her back to the land of the heteros. I got to get out of here, JoJo. Let's get the fuck out of here, dude. But I did want to tell the people that I will be in Chicago and Madison, Wisconsin, the 18th and 19th. Go to 3mikes.com. Where is it? What do you do in Chicago?

I'm doing 3 Mikes. You mean what place? The Thalia Theater. Thalia Thalia theater Thalia theater yeah Chicago's got a lot of cool theaters yeah it's cool and um the Madison I'm doing the majestic and then I'm shooting three mics in Los Angeles September 9th don't have a venue yet but majestic theater in Madison Wisconsin yeah I said that's a dope spot. Yeah. So you don't change shirts or anything, do you? No, same shirt. Imagine if you had wardrobe changes.

Yeah, it would be pretty great. Put a costume on. So yeah, so Three Mics, September 9th in LA. Go to threemics.com or follow me on Twitter. I'll update it. And 18th in Madison of August and 19th of August in Chicago. I hopefully delved enough into that magnetic treatment for depression. 18th in Madison of August and 19th of August in Chicago. I hopefully delved enough into that magnetic treatment for depression.

Yeah, look it up if you're interested because it's really, really, it was very, nothing has been more helpful to me in my entire career of depression. Is it available to everybody? Yeah. It's on a test thing? Yeah, you can look it up. Like I said, it's covered by Blue Cross. That's pretty impressive. Yeah, it's hugely helpful test thing. Yeah, you can look it up. Like I said, it's covered by Blue Cross. That's pretty impressive. Yeah, it's hugely helpful.

And the numbers are really good. There's a new one also called, I want to call it Theta Burst or Alpha Burst CMT. But they're using the CMT shit for tons of, like you were saying about that radio lab, they're using it for tons of different brain areas. And it's really effective. And I say that having experienced it firsthand. It's kind of crazy. We're juicing our brains up with electricity and firing them up.

Who gets hurt? Yeah. Good. We're going to have Magneto helmets one day for sure, right? Like the X-Men dude that put that helmet on and all the magnets and he would float through the air. Yeah, hopefully. We're going to have those fucking things. We just got to make it past our failing bodies.

But once we get there. I think one of these cranial helmets, if they had a cranial helmet that came up with, that had all these electrodes just constantly zapping your brain while you're walking around with it on. Yeah. See your life clearer. Yes. Yes. You're a good boy, Joe.

Everybody knows it. You're a good man as well. Yeah. I like you. Good to see you, buddy. Nice your life clearer. Yes. Yes. You're a good boy, Joe. Everybody knows it. You're a good man as well. Yeah. Good to see you, buddy. Nice to talk. I always enjoy our conversations. Yeah, I do too. Yeah.

Fun. Yeah. Neil Brennan, ladies and gentlemen. All right.