The Joe Rogan Experience - #859 - Brian Redban

Episode Date: October 13, 2016

Brian Redban is a comedian and the founder of the Deathsquad podcast network. Check out his newest podcast called "What Brian Redban Do" at http://deathsquad.tv & on Spotify under "Deathsquad"

And we're live Are you writing notes? Yes What are you writing notes about? Just things that would be cool if we talk about What are you organized? I always do that I just know you don't like me looking at my computer

So I'm trying to go analog Yeah I think both of us would be better off in these things if we just it's it's so easy to just start reading computers when especially when you're reading shit that's on on the internet just to get when one person's talking just start thinking about the next thing you're gonna read about instead of uh just talking you know there's just too much it's too much coming at us it's like obsessive i like to obsessively like fact check though and like make sure I'm saying the right thing. So you know, you won't get trumped later.

Yeah, you, uh, you have to with this stuff, but it, I mean, don't you think it's like harder to form an opinion now than it's ever been before? Oh yeah.

It's, it's insane. I mean, just looking back at old videos, I'm like, Oh, that's a different day. Yeah.

You know, I, I should probably delete this now if you would you know like the the amount of data that you take in today as opposed to just 20 years ago like when i when i see something anything that's happened and i read a story about something i gotta throw it through like 10 filters. I got to like, is this real? Is this bullshit?

Like who's making this? What is this? And then you have to just, you know, like every time someone sends you some, what article is it on? That's what I always do with Eddie Bravo. Eddie Bravo hit me up with some crazy shit. I go, okay, what, before you get too excited, what website was this? World Truther Organization West. west you know like there's some nutty fucking articles that are written that aren't real it's hard to figure out what the

fuck is really going on with some things yeah and they're so tricky now too like it'll be like nbcnews.com.com you know there's like two.com yeah there's like there's fucking weird ones man like i saw one the other day that i think was a scam There's like two dot coms. There's fucking weird ones, man. Like I saw one the other day that I think was a scam. It was for some fucking brain pill. And it led you to some NBC looking website. And I was like, what is this? That's what I'm talking about.

Yeah, I followed this rabbit hole of, okay, what happens when you click that? Okay, what's going on over here? Yeah, it's like a fake cnn where it's just like and it has like a like an article about this brain pill and you're reading it as if cnn wrote this article it's it there's a lot of those brain pill things in the soylent you know the soylent uh it's like that uh yeah it's like a full meal yeah and they released these bars recently. And all these people are going to the hospital, and they sent it to the lab trying to figure out what it is.

Is this a fact check thing? Yeah, no, this is true. And so they just recalled all these protein bars, like the whole thing. What? And it's like this one guy couldn't stop throwing up. He had to go to the ER just from these pills or these food bars. Oh, my God. What's in these fucking things?

I don't know. But the old Soylent is People thing, you'd think they would change their name. That's a fucking giant horror line in a science fiction movie. I know. Soylent Green is People. Yeah. That's what they said, right? Wasn't that what the line was in the movie?

Yeah. Speaking of movies, but not really, this is not happening. Ari Shaffir's show premieres tonight, midnight, ladies and gentlemen. And I know he's got a lot of funny fucking people on this season. It's a great show if you haven't seen it before. It's really one of the best shows on television because it's really funny people like Joey Diaz and I mean he's had

Stan Hope on. I know Rollins is on this season. Henry Rollins. Notice I said Rollins. It's like when people used to pretend they knew Eddie Murphy. They just call him Eddie. Me and Eddie. We're tight. We're just tight. Me and Eddie. Just fucking hang out together. You don't want to say his last name. eddie who murphy bro murphy i'm trying to think

is there anyone that you saw ones i mean if you really were hanging out with them like like sharing a pizza or you know would you call him by his last name rollins no i definitely would not that would be so rude hey rollins i'd be like ew if someone like hey rogan I'd be like, ew. If someone was like, hey, Rogan, I'd be like, oh, man. Yeah, that's. But actually, no, that's not bad. It depends on the length of the name. Right? Like, if your name, if you have a long, crazy name, like Fedor Emelianenko.

If you're like, hey, Emelianenko. Like, my name's Fedor, bitch. Just call me Fedor. Right? That's when you get a nickname real quick. Yeah, you have to get a nickname. Yeah. If you're like, hey, Emilio Nenko, my name's Fedor, bitch. Just call me Fedor. That's when you get a nickname real quick. Yeah, you have to get a nickname. What about Seinfeld? You would probably say Mr. Seinfeld, right?

Oh, I would say Mr. Seinfeld. I said Mr. Ventura when I met Jesse Ventura. I called him sir. I always try to show, especially to older guys that I like, I always try to show them a lot of respect. Yeah, if I met Seinfeld, for sure, I'd call him mr. Seinfeld he's Jerry fucking Seinfeld but if you were sharing a pizza like watching a movie mr. Seinfeld let me ask you this yeah it's weird but I mean tell me like some young kid who's seen you online for all these years hasn't done that to you

oh yeah when friends call me red band it's gross like i'm like oh stop what the fuck my name is brian people introduce me as red man it's gross you're like a rapper you have a name yeah did you know do we already say this did you know red man the rapper yeah has a group called death deaf. Deaf Squad? That's hilarious. That's like simulation theory shit. I had no idea. That's like parallel universes. I had no idea.

It's fucking weird. That's so bizarre. That is so bizarre and totally independent of each other and just think of like how many different variables there are in between. Is there a Red Baron, Deaf Squad? That is hilarious. Red Man.

See, Red Man and Deaf Squad. That is hilarious, dude. Oh, he's got Eric Sermon from EPMD? Yeah. Dude. He's like one of the best rappers of all time, and he's got like a weird speech thing going on, right? I don't know him.

EPMD? Dude, I used to love EPMD. You don't know EPMD? I definitely know the name, but that's a generation just above my age group. Dude, old school hip hop. What's their main song? I probably know the songs. I probably just don't remember.

I haven't listened to their shit in a long time. I used to be a giant fan. Strictly Business. Yes. There we go. Go to an album. Strictly Business was great. You Got to Chill was great.

They still got a myspace how about this here's something that big people forget big daddy cane remember follow the leader yeah dude or was that eric being rakim eric being rakim was follow the leader big daddy cane god damn big daddy keen had a bunch of giant hits i met him when i was was a kid. My cousin loved him, and he went to his show in Florida. Let's see what the Big Daddy Kane hits were. Ain't no half-steppin'. Ain't no half-steppin'. Smooth operator.

I get the job done. Yeah. He had a lot of great shit. Taste of chocolate album. He had a great style too like a great smooth quick style of rapping I wish we could play some of this I know

yanked off motherfucking YouTube that's too bad but educate yourself folks go get a hold of some Big Daddy Kane. Go listen to Cool Moe D, I Go to Work. Da-da-dum, da-da-dum, da-da-dum. You gotta think back then,

rap was only a few years old. That's what's even cooler about it. Like, if you listen to Cool Moe D, I Go to Work, let me take a guess, because I listened to that when I was a kid. If I had to guess, that's a song from the 80s, right? Yeah, I Go to Work. Let me take a guess, because I listened to that when I was a kid. If I had to guess, that's a song from the 80s, right? Yeah, I'd say that.

1989. Okay. So I went to school. I went to a middle school in Jamaica Plain, Massachusetts, when I was 13 years old. And I remember that's when that hip hop, hip it to the hip it, hip hop, that's when that hip hop, hibbity to the hibbity hip hop, that's when that was going on

that's when the Sugarhill Gang had just come out with the first rap music ever that I had ever heard rather, I mean there might have been some before but that was the first mainstream rap that I was exposed to as a kid so that was 1980

I think come on son, this is good shit yeah yeah come on man kumo d look at the glasses it's great now it's just how does this not get us kicked off youtube okay let's let's hope kumo d doesn't fuck us we're just trying to give you props dude when l cool j uh you know don't call it a comeback came out yeah i had a ford torres and had like the best bass ever but that time period of music was exciting because dude ll cool j is a bad motherfucker but people don't like to give ll cool J too much props because he's too good looking and he's too yoked. Yeah, he's always eating ice cream.

People don't like it. He's jacked. He's built like a superhero. He's a beautiful man. I saw him perform this summer in Columbus. He headlined a big festival, and there was tons of ladies that were just rapping all his old songs, getting excited for the night,

just walking up, singing the Phenomenon. Did he play the... All his old stuff, yeah. Even at one point, he stopped the show. He was like, All right, what do you guys want? Some new shit? You want the old shit?

And everyone was like, Oh, we want the old shit! That's crazy. Wow. Mama said, knock you out? I mean, come on, dude. Come on, man. That song doesn't jack you up

when you're on the elliptical machine? Oh, yeah. Don't go to come back. It's a great fucking song. And it's so loud and powerful. Going back to Cali, to Cali. Come on, man. He's got some great songs.

Great songs. Her bikini, small, heels, tall. She said she likes the ocean. Jesus. I need to re-listen to that. I haven't heard that song in a long time. That fucking song rules. And again, I mean, think of LL Cool J.

When was that? When was Going Back to Cali? That was probably 90s. Yeah, same time period, right? 89? Yeah, that song I was just playing was in 87. What about I Go to Work? We just said that's 89, right? 89? Yeah, that song I was just playing was in 87. What about I Go to Work? We just said that's 89, right?

Yeah. So what about going back to Cali? 88, 89, right? I was middle school. 89? 89. That's insane. That's insane.

Yeah, I was just about to graduate high school. No, I graduated high school at 85. 89 was, that's how weird my brain works. I think of graduating high school. 88, actually. This is recorded in 87, released January 27th, 1988. 88. I think of graduating high school and the day I started comedy.

I superimpose those sometimes. Like literally, I think of, these are the two milestones of my youth for sure. Graduating high school, 1985, and then starting comedy, 1988. Those are the big milestones. So sometimes I confabulate them. Is that the word?

No. That might not be the right word. Stepped out of my lane again. Do you have one of those word of the day, like calendars, and every day you look at it? No. No, I just try to find a good word that fits. My friend has one of those, and every day she tries to use a new word, and I'm just like, it's the word, isn't it? What is this?

Okay. In psychiatry, confabulation is a disturbance of memory defined as the production of fabricated distorted or misinterpreted memories about oneself or the world without conscious intention to deceive never I used it right how did I use it again what did I say right that Iabulate them. But I know that I'm wrong once I say it. Okay, so it's a disturbance of memory. Yeah, so it's right. Confabulation.

Okay. Yeah. Yeah, I get, I think about it, man. Think about those, that like, the date you graduated high school, did you ever have like nightmares that you had to go back, that you didn't take tests? I slept through most of high school. The whole school I was sleeping.

It was all a dream to me. I actually probably slept, honestly, 40% of high school. Why? Because I only liked art class, and that's all I liked. I hated everything else, except English. I liked English class because I liked, uh, like stories and writing crazy shit. I have to bring this up cause I brought it up on the podcast before. There was a guy, I think I told you that, um, when I was in high

school that I had, uh, an art teacher that was just a douchebag. He just was not nice and he was like really negative and he must have been depressed. He just wasn't a happy guy. And he made me stop doing art because I didn't want to be in his class. I liked Frank Frazetta illustrations, and I liked comic book illustrations. That's what I was really into learning how to do. And this guy was just pissing on dreams, just saying, you'll never be able to do. And this guy was just like pissing on dreams, you know, just saying like, you'll never be able to do that.

You're going to have to be able to do advertisements for magazines. That's most likely where you're going to work. Wow. He was just super negative. But there was one guy in the class that was the most talented guy by far. His name's John DeVore. And I talked about it on the podcast and John reached out to me.

Oh, fuck. John got a hold of me and he told me that he fucking quit that guy's class. That guy failed him. And this guy was insanely talented. He was like, I was always like pretty good. But there was another guy in our class that was better than me too. His name was Kevin. He was a football player. He was a big stocky fucking dude

and his brother was on the football team god damn i wish i could remember his last name but those were two guys i was like number three those are two guys where they were the and it was all we all did the same style of like was all a comic book illustration type shit and devore could draw like he was the most versatile he could draw like uh things like he could draw beautiful things like he could draw a rose or he could draw a monster i can only draw monsters if i had to draw a rose it's gonna look like shit but i'll draw a fucked up you know werewolf werewolf or something like that and so that was into that kind of stuff and and all three of us were into like that sort of comic book style art and this fucking teacher just she she i mean he rather

uh got the most talented guy in the class and gave him an f yeah when he told me that i went what i think he said give him an f that's fucked up and that teacher wouldn't exist in today's world because you would have filmed him you would have put on youtube it would become a news story you know it would have been like checking the teachers is like another big thing where it is but it's when a teacher has tenure it can be really difficult in certain schools you know i know they have that problem with that in certain universities teachers have tenure like you really can't fire them and once they know they can't be fired like if they could be like really really radical and have some crazy fucking ideas and teach your kids some shit that you don't agree with that no one agrees with and if they get into a university and they get into the system and your

kid winds up in their class i mean there's some really crazy teachers out there and um there's this guy in toronto who is a professor and they're demanding that he take sensitivity courses and all kinds of crazy shit. And they're calling him transphobic because he won't use the 28 different gender pronouns that are available today. There's like 30 fucking gender pronouns. So they're talking to him. They're calling him transphobic and gender binary, gender believer. And this guy is lashing out instead of backing off. He's decided to make more and more educational YouTube videos about what's wrong with this kind of censorship. Because what he's saying is and and I agree with this if you look at a lot of like what's going on with like maybe what people would

call a social justice warrior or people want to shut people down from being able to say something what's going on it's like it's there's there's this need to control and there's there's like a need to control other people and to push your idea on other people whether or not they agree with you or not that mirrors the same thing that happens with religions it's like you might be right or you might not be right there might be an argument against what you're saying that you might have to consider like in that when when people get an idea one way in their head they don't want to consider any other possibilities. And when you see these kids rallying against this one professor,

it's never been more evident because this professor is brilliant. And what he's saying is non-emotional. And he's talking about the problems with how these things are defined. And one of the things is he brought up this DVD that one of the teachers of this course was making about how to make sure that you're not subconsciously biased or subconsciously prejudiced. And the DVDs were like 700 bucks or something like that for a DVD series. Yeah. Well, this guy outlines all this in his video, in his YouTube video.

And he's like, this is craziness. Like, this doesn't make sense. It's never been proven to work. The idea that there's subconscious biases, that you're accusing someone of being guilty before you're ever even talking to them about something like you like you don't even know a saying a subconscious bias is a very strange thing like boy how do you know if you have that it's subconscious like you can't even like you're you're you're making people think they're guilty even if they're not like if you say you have a subconscious bias that's one of the things that people do when they're super, super liberal.

In order to prevent from other people thinking they have a subconscious bias, they go way out of their way to show no bias whatsoever and even favor something that people would be biased against. Like they're super into gay marriage. I love seeing gay couples. It's amazing. Do you love seeing heterosexual couples too? Or do you just freak out over gay people? Like, what's going on? You know, I like seeing people in love too.

But, I mean, don't you like seeing all of them? I like seeing the whole batch. It's nice. It's very exhausting nowadays. Gay people in love? Just everything. Like how you're supposed to act, what you're supposed to say. It's ridiculous.

There was a, last night, I was at this bar. And I thought I was sitting next to a taller woman. what you're supposed to say it's ridiculous there was a last night i was at this bar and this i thought i was sitting next to a taller woman and then she looked over she looked over and it was obviously a post you know like a transformation and i mean a transgender woman you fuck you have to say the right word with your mouth you have to say the right word she transformed uh anyways so but then the whole time she right right uh she kept on looking at me as if but that person was way taller and so if it was a guy it would be a big giant guy just just staring at me right so either way i feel i felt like freaked out about it you know so am i not allowed to be freaked out because because she a woman now? That some guy's staring at me?

Woman? Yeah, well, anyone staring at you, you're allowed to get freaked out over anyone staring at you. I mean, if a little kid was staring at you, like Mad Dog in New News 10, you're like, oh my God, am I going to have to fuck this 10-year-old up? You know, anybody staring at you is not good. I didn't know how to act, though. It was weird. You got to stand your ground.

You got to growl. Can you get your back up? Get your prickles up? It's weird. If you don't want to vote for Hillary this election, people kind of think that you hate women, essentially. I don't know that it's overall. Not necessarily.

Just fools. Just fools. There's people that... It's an obvious target, right? You don't vote for her because you hate women. You don't understand what a milestone this is, man. You don't care. Because you don't fucking care.

Okay? You know what you're worried about, man? You're worried about going to the gym and being a bro. Okay? So why don't you do that? Why don't you just go to the gym and be a bro and leave the fucking voting to people who care? You know, those super like aggro progressive type people like i remember i was in a bar once in new york and i was having a conversation with this uh

this girl who was a waitress and the bartender got so aggro bro on me and it was uh it was about the it was the oj simpson case where O.J. Simpson had been accused of domestic violence before, like before the murder. It was something like that. Something along those lines. And I remember all I asked was, I said, that's interesting. I said he was accused of being, but he was acquitted. And the guy just totally ego bro'd me. And he goes, listen, man, when a woman says that something happened, it fucking happened.

Okay. Until you know better, it happened. But didn't you just say he was acquitted? Like, I think he probably murdered his ex-wife and that dude. But didn't you say that he was acquitted? You can't attack that in there if he was acquitted. We don't really know what happened. Unless you were there.

We know that a court of law found that he wasn't guilty of it. Is that because he had a lot of money? Did he never go to trial for that? Was it just something that someone accused him of dropping and then dropped the charges? What was it? But he didn't want to hear none of that, dude. He wanted to come strong with the EcoBro. He just puffed up.

I didn't even respond to him. I remember going, look at this silly fuck. This is ridiculous. He got so aggro with me. Did you watch that Made in America, that ESPN 30 for 30 on the trial yet? No. It's available on demand. They'm probably leave it up there for a while it's still as far as I look I looked it up it's the only place you can find they show the

actual photos from the crime scene and photos of autopsy photo but of of Nicole with like a slash in her throat you can see Ron Goldman too yeah they don't show when they re-air it on TV so if you're watching it you can try to catch it there. I tried to show it to my friend the other day. I was like, wait, right here, it's going to come up. Then it didn't. They cut it out. It's literally only on demand if you want to see it. You can't even find them online anymore.

I don't know how they kept it off the web. It's amazing how some things can be kept off the web pretty easy nowadays. I forget what it was recently where they did just the best job. Oh, those photos of the SNL girl. Oh, yeah. And those were just gone.

Like every link dead. There was not one place to find it. It was really well done. But it's weird how, did you hear 4chan's closing? It is. They're going bankrupt. It costs money you hear 4chan's closing uh they're going bankrupt it costs money to run 4chan yeah a lot of the servers mostly they must get mad mad crazy traffic right yeah it's weird all our websites are dying you know members style project and i used to talk

that dude on the phone j style yeah even dig i Even Dig. I don't think I've been to Dig in so long. I don't even know if that's still there. Dig's there. Yeah? Yeah. I go to Dig all the time. Do you? Yeah, you get crazy stories.

Dig is like one of the one-stop shops of getting interesting shit online. For me, I'm like, what the fuck is going on in the world? I'll go to Dig, and Dig will be about some new scientific adventure next to you know some new fucking paleological find next to some new technological discovery next to you know new cell phones new cars like it's all kinds of crazy stories come out man seems like when kevin left i kind of just stopped going i started using reddit more and yeah. All those are great. But to me, it's a super easy one-stop, what's the weird shit? And always weird, interesting things. They aggregate these stories from all these other different websites and stuff, too.

It's easy to go to someone who's already done the collecting for you. I believe in supporting collectors because I don't have the time to do that you're going out finding all these cool stories about space and you're putting them up in one spot that's very valuable because it's like a dj they're like a dj for stories because they're not just covering any fucking story because if they covered any fucking story it would be boring as shit you know there's a lot of stories that are going on that are just like oh that's not that good but they figured out like what's the juiciest shit like what's the more interesting shit what's the this what's the that and they shuffle it all in together and you always can get something fascinating out of it it's very addictive man like looking on the internet for those stories, like weird, crazy fucking scientific discoveries.

And it's, it's very addictive. I went deep together. I just like when you get deep in a subject and then you start watching videos and you start learning more. And then if anyone asks, happens to ask you that question, you'd be like, Oh,

I know everything. Like I, I went deep on toaster ovens, right? So if you need any information with toaster ovens, I know all the recent news on toaster ovens, but I went deep on toaster ovens. So if you need any information with toaster ovens, I know all the recent news on toaster ovens. But I went so deep. I just laid in bed for two hours watching reviews of toaster ovens.

Dude, you're the go-to toaster oven guy. I tell everybody that. Do you have a toaster oven? It's great. They're great. I've never had one. You know what they're really good for, man? English muffins with like tuna fish on them and a little cheese.

Fly that bitch in there. Damn, he just made a face. Like he's disgusted. How dare you? Yeah, Martin, you could put a chicken in it. You don't believe in a tuna melt with an English muffin? No? You wouldn't eat a tuna melt?

Tuna's got a stench to it that I can't describe. Someone doesn't eat pussy. Someone doesn't eat pussy. When you're like, when you have, what is it, fresh? It's not mahi, mahi, mahi, mahi? Yeah. Yes. Yeah, so like that, and I know it's different from like what a star-kissed in a little pouch or whatever.

Right. Obviously way different tuna. But to me, when it's out in the open and someone's just cooked it, it just fills up the room with a fucking stench. That's why you mix it with mustard and mayo. I don't know how to describe it. It smells like the ocean. It's real weird. Yeah, that doesn't bother me. No, no, no.

You gotta put weird shit, though. You gotta put a bunch of weird shit with your food. Eddie Bravo's got an onion thing. If he gets onions or something, he'll fucking throw up. Really? Yeah. Hates onions. Hates them. Why? His stepfather was a dick. And his stepfather used to make him eat ceviche. Oh.

And so to this day, he sees onions, he wants to fucking throw up. Wait, who wants being made to eat ceviche? Ceviche is great. Hey, man, I wasn't there. What the fuck? I don't know what went down, but that is my boy. Yeah. He just can't eat any onions.

If he gets onions, he'll fucking puke. Toe is Korean, so she eats all this fucked up... Kimchi? She do the kimchi? She eats eyeballs. She loves eating fish eyeballs. She'll just go up to a fish and pull out the eyeball and eat it. I'm like, what are you doing?

And she had this... Her mom's sick, so we this, like, her mom's sick. So we went to go visit her mom. And so she opens up this thing. She's like, Mom, I got you everything. And it was, like, everything that you wouldn't want to eat. Like, pig ear, pig feet, like, cow noses. Like, it was just, like, a smorgasbord.

There was not one thing that i would eat in this whole tray and it was like a delicatessen to them whoa where do they balut that's philippines they love that stuff we used to serve that on fear factor as a like a hard thing to do and my filipino friends because uh in pool like a lot of the best uh pool players in the world are filipino so i played pool a lot i was always around filipino guys and while i was doing fear factor i like a lot of the best pool players in the world are Filipino. So I played pool a lot. I was always around Filipino guys. And while I was doing Fear Factor, I played a lot of pool.

These fucking dudes, they were like, I'll eat that shit tomorrow. Like bring some of it in. You got any leftover? They wanted to eat it. I was like, we made people eat that stuff.

If you don't know what we're talking about, it's a fetus. It's a duck fetus. It's cooked in the yolk. It's really kind of fucked up It's kind of gruesome and it looks like a duck like that. I remember it looked like a baby duck that you just eat a baby Duck. Yeah, I didn't know until I was like fucking 39 years old or something I mean, I don't know how old I was when I found out that a Chicken egg doesn't become a chicken. Like, I never thought of it.

I never even thought of it. Like, of course it can't become a chicken. It's just like, I thought you had to just grab them quick before the chicken came out. If you eat them, don't let them expire. That's what I thought. If you got them early, but if you sat on them, then you're going to have to take care of that goddamn chicken

because the chick's going to be born. That's what I thought. I thought you had to eat the eggs quick because they were're going to have to take care of that goddamn chicken because the chick's going to be born. And that's what I thought. I thought you had to eat the eggs quick because they were just going to become chickens. Because in my mind, and this is as a dopey child, I felt like once something's out of the body, well, it's obviously, it's just, that's how they do it. They lay their eggs and then the things come out of the eggs. It's out of the body. It must have given birth.

Like in my mind, it has to be, it's an egg, it's in a shell, it gave birth. So I didn't understand that, no, it has to be a fertilized egg. Oh, so what happens then? Well, then all that shit that's in the egg, all that shit becomes a little bird. But birds are such hoes, they're so goddamn prolific that they drop an egg every day. I know. I have birds that, I have chickens they drop an egg every day i know i have birds that i have chickens that drop an egg every day that means every day they they want to be shitting out a

baby is your cholesterol or anything gone up since you got these chickens that is a gigantic myth dietary cholesterol according to the most recent science according to people that are way smarter than me okay i know there's some disputes on this amongst people that are um plant-based people that believe that you can get everything that you uh you need from vegetables but um i think dietary cholesterol is less significant than sedentary lifestyle. Genetics are a huge factor in having high cholesterol. And then there's also, I've come to learn about LDL cholesterol and HDL cholesterol, and that having higher levels of each other can balance each other out. And it's not necessarily the level of cholesterol they're concerned with

it's the type of cholesterol so it's it's not food it's not like dietary cholesterol is actually important for developing hormones it's actually an important uh factor in in just your your body having the the proper nutrients to rebuild itself like dietary cholesterol is actually good for you we've been fucked we've been fucked we've been fucked by these food industries there was an article today from aris technica how do you say that ours technica where they were talking about the sugar industry the soda industry paying off people to lie about the negative health effects of sugar. Yeah. Of

sugar in their sodas. We forget that sodas were created as a dessert. You're not supposed to drink it as a beverage, really. All day long. Yeah, it was supposed to be like, oh, after dinner, maybe we can all split a Coca-Cola. Big Soda is buying off health orgs to keep profits and Americans fat.

Top producers backed 96 national organizations defeated 29 proposed regulations. Whoa. Now, I switched to Arnold Palmer's a few years ago and iced teas. Rest in peace, Arnold Palmer. But I don't know if that's better, though, because the sugar of the lemonade. Probably not. It's not half a glass. Well, it depends on how much, how many grams, you know, really you would.

There's some there's a new soda that they sweeten with stevia. I wonder if it's any good. It's gross. I saw somebody was drinking it. That's very health conscious. The other day I looked at them drinking it. I tried the what is it? The Trader Joe's or the

Whole Foods Stevia Colas. And it tastes like RC Cola. Remember RC Cola? It was Nate Diaz. Nate Diaz was drinking it. Nate had it on his I think that is it. Is it called Zevia? Nate had it on his Instagram page.

Look, I like Stevia and coffee. I like it. It's different than soda different than uh sugar but at least i know it's not fucking me you know starbucks just finally got stevia and almond milk within the last month there he goes zevia yeah and you know if you know nate nate is super health conscious he eats real clean they uh once they really got deep into like triathlons and stuff like that that's when they really like nick was the first one he really met a bunch of people that ate really clean all these racers and and then he realized like oh okay like organic food's way better for you oh okay you know don't eat pastas and breads. And then I think he cut out everything except for fish.

I think it was like no land animals he was doing for a while, but he might even be full vegan now. And his brother's gone back and forth. Sometimes they take in fish. And I know that they were eating eggs. Jake Shields eat eggs. You know, like a lot of those guys hang out together. And they have a real similar diet.

But those guys, if they're drinking something like that, like that Zevia shit, I guarantee it's not bad for you. Stevia is just not bad for you, right? I've never seen any negative effects of Stevia. I thought there was. Because I remember I was really big into Stevia. And then there was an article that came out about something. And I like you know i'm just going back to sugar i'm just sick of this my only sugar that i really take now is like i get some sugar in my iced coffee instead of putting sweeteners in there oh yeah just put it in yours so you get it unsweetened and you dump it

in yeah just a little bit man but i don't know how bad that is and i've cut down starbucks now i used to do it every day, like one of these every day. Now I do it like twice a week. I think they're saying more and more that it's just not good unless it's in the food naturally. Like sugar, when it's connected to all the fiber and all the vitamins and nutrients, it's in like an orange or something like that. Like, you know, there's some juicy oranges that you get that are probably better than any dessert you ever have. But isn't there like a factor in desserts that, you know, you're not supposed to be eating that

shit, you know? Yeah. The thing I, the thing I miss the most and it's hard to get out here in California, or at least I, unless you go to like a, like a market or like an outdoor, one of those Or at least, unless you go to a market or an outdoor one of those, is a peach or a nectarine or a plum that's actually nice. In Ohio, you would just bite these humongous peaches and they'd just melt in your mouth. Out here, they're hard as a rock. And then you just have to kind of wait for them to get mushy one day and go, okay, now it's mushy.

But mushy is not the same as that. I think you gotta catch them in season. Yeah. And I think, look, it's dry as fuck out here. I bet a lot of like fruit trees and shit. I mean, we're good for almonds, man. This is what California is good for, almonds. Oh, here's some shit I found out, okay? When I was at the Tohon Ranch,

the Tohon Ranch, they have pistachio trees. But they graft the pistachio leaves and branches onto another sturdier tree, like an avocado. Oh, cool. And so you've got like a pistachio tree growing out of an avocado tree. That's awesome. And the dude was telling me, I was like, what? They can do that? Did you know they could do that? I think they do a lot of things like that in farming nowadays like uh how did i not know that i mean i knew about grafting like limbs onto other plants

but i always thought it was the same plant like you would graft your tomato branch onto another tomato what the fuck man How do they do that? It's kind of, I don't know. Again, I would say they probably, like... What is this, Jamie? It's a hand-drawn diagram, it looks like. It says right here, like, figure when they cut. You know what this looks like? Whenever dudes get abducted by aliens,

and then they come back, what was it like? Well, let me draw it for you. This is the first one. The first one I come to, I'm on the table. The second one, the table says, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop. Go back, go back. What are you doing? The second one, the table starts to vibrate, and then the alien comes in from overhead,

and now all I could see was his head and the lights in the ceiling, and then an examining machine came down. See the arrow? Down. That's exactly what it looks like. And then I became one with the galaxy. See? There's the alien and then the galaxy. He reaches the next

level. The next level of the game. That's what I see. I see a dick and a butthole and it's getting probed on that last one. Uh, I don't see a dick. If your dick looks like that, go to a doctor for sure. It's a quake dick. It's a quake dick. It looks like a nail.

It's a T-cut. Oh, a T-cut. On a stem, and then they're implanting it. It says a bud gets implanted in there. Oh, wow. And then the bud grows out of the stem. Wow, that's crazy. So they implant the bud in there and then they cut it?

Is that what they're saying? It says cutting the bud? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't know. There's some other pictures where you can kind of see that, but like this is a little more of a... How bizarre is that, man?

They make a tree grow inside another tree. I did not know that they can franken-tree, but I should have known, right? It makes sense. Did they talk about the drought and how pistachios are supposedly going to double in price in the next year? Because we had such a drought this year. And I guess pistachios are just about to go crazy sky high. So buy them now.

I know that's a really good point. And I know it's important for agriculture in California. But I want to go, what are your pistachios gonna cost more oh you fucking baby what if you buy a bag a day that's like dude it's two dollars more a day in pistachios

I'm fucked how much what percentage of your fucking budget goes to pistachios ever in your life like if you had to even consume a moment of your fucking budget goes to pistachios ever in your life? To even consume a moment of your time thinking about this as a possibility, like, what about the pistachio prices going up? I love... What's your favorite three things that you buy?

Well, if I gave you an opportunity to give up pistachios for the rest of your life, do you think you would struggle? No. There'd be no issues. I'd go mad walnut. There'd be no issues. I'd go mad walnut. There'd be no issues. I'd be like, I'm a Brazil nut.

I'm interesting. I like complex flavors. Yeah, I mean, there'd be no problem. You'd eat peanuts. You'd be like, cashews. I'm down with cashews.

I don't need. Where do you buy walnuts? Like, full walnuts? Like, I tried to buy, like, walnuts. Not, like, chopped up walnuts. Like, I'm talking about

the ones in the shell where you crack them with the stupid crackers. Good question. I guess the supermarket, right? I looked. They don't have walnuts? Maybe walnuts. Nobody gives a fuck about walnuts anymore. People realize, like, you have, like, mixed nuts.

Like, ah, bitch-ass walnuts. Give me that almond, motherfucker. Who wants to crack that? Especially, yeah. Like, how many people buy nutcrackers these days if you're not if you're not cracking claws like lobster claws or crab claws right you're not buying a fucking nutcracker was I'm cracking a nut bitch crack any nuts I have a nutcracker collection at home I it's one of those things you just leave in Ohio.

Just like the dance? Yeah. The one where you have the handle and they... Yeah, those are real. That's what people don't know. Like the nutcracker. When I was a kid,

I was always like, why they call it the nutcracker when it's just a bunch of wooden toys? Why is that the nutcracker? Then I realized, oh, those are actual nutcrackers. When I was a boy,

we cracked our nuts. We didn't just go and buy them all shelled and packaged by Mexicans. I also had a box of wooden ducks. Remember when that was a popular thing? That's how stupid people were when we were kids. Like, here, have a wooden duck, you fucking dumbs. You're too stupid to play with anything that moves, you piece of shit. Just take this fucking wooden duck and pretend it's real. You're too stupid to play with anything that moves, you piece of shit.

Just take this fucking wooden duck and pretend it's real. Yeah, have duck fights. I don't give a shit. I'm over here starving to death. Wooden duck. There was some that was ultra realistic, like they had the green head and everything. And then there was ones that were just all brown that weren't painted and stuff. But I have like 20 of them. I don't know why.

That's hilarious. Dude, you got wooden ducks. They're probably valuable. Not those. Oh, the roller ones are for babies, dude. It's not a baby. Do you know what I'm talking about, though? Was that a thing,

or was that just like a stupid redneck thing or something? I'm sure there's like stupid wooden toys that I remember when I was a boy. Here's the argument, though. It's the argument that it gave us more room for creativity when we were kids because we were playing with these stupid toys that really

didn't do much, so we had to do it all in our own head instead of being, like, overwhelmed by a video game. You know what I'm saying? That. Yeah. That's what it is. Oh, that's a decoy, bro. That's actually like a well-done decoy. Like, what that is is they use those when they hunt ducks. They put that shit in the water.

Oh, that's weird. Well, this had like a, well, maybe they did, but this had like real feathers. Yeah, like this stuff. You'd put it on your fireplace. Okay. Well, that's because people use them for decorations too. Oh, that's just redneck. What it is is that, no, no, no, no.

Some of them are beautiful. What they started out, see, when you call it a decoy, it's just because it's the exact same shape as a decoy. It might not ever see the water. But what those were originally is people trying to make ducks that looked exactly like a duck so you could float it on the pond and the ducks would fly over and go, oh, these ducks are just hanging out here.

This is a cool spot. And they land and you blast them. I mean, that's what Duck Dynasty is all about. That is a show and an empire built on duck slaughter. Trickery and fuckery. That's what they should rename Duck Dynasty, trickery and fuckery, because they're tricking those ducks and just blowing them out of the sky. But because people got really good at it they started doing

his art like some of them are just art like people like grandma type people have them on their mantelpiece and i love this i love this i love what it represents it's beautiful yeah i got a lot of them if you want it no i'm not I'm not into that. It's funny because my mom is like, Brian, I don't want, I want to throw away all this shit. And I was like, Mom, you have a basement. It's like, why bother throwing it away? It's not, you don't need more room. You know, it's like you barely even go in your basement.

And she's like just telling me all the shit that I have there that I completely forgot. Like I have a brand new laser disc player back home. I have laser discs. Yeah, laser discs are... Isn't it funny that some things get to a certain point? Like, if you hang on to that laser disc, maybe it'll be one day

like that tuba with a needle on it that you drop down on the records. You know? Because that shit is dope now. If you had one of those, if you had one of those

old school, like, 1903 tuba things, you know what I mean? Yeah, yeah. It was like, it was non-mechanical or non-electrical. You turned the handle. I think so.

Right, the record player with the speaker shell. Yeah. Yeah, there was like a, like the needle was attached to like a thing that looked like a musical instrument. Phonograph. Yeah. Phonograph.

It's called a phonograph? Yeah. Yeah, is there a video of that thing? Oh, for sure. Yeah, for sure phonograph yeah is there a video of that thing oh for sure yeah for sure pull up a video of that thing because I haven't even thought of that thing

and do you watch Antique Roadshow by chance probably like 10 years no I just I forgot those things were real at one point in time

it's like one of those things where you go back to like the history of stuff and you go oh yeah this is even showing I tried to tell you about this before this is what they used before uh records the edison cylinder right that's right you did tell

me about this and this is just a metal like yeah it's like a kid's toy nowadays yeah but god that'd be so valuable if you had that in your house oh yeah like if you had that in your mom's house and you you've fished that out one day you'd be like holy shit like if you had that in your mom's house and you fished that out one day you'd be like holy shit especially if it said Edison on it well dude that laser disc recorder as goofy as it seems now there's gonna come a time where it's not goofy anymore

I know it's gonna make a comeback and we're all gonna be like watching no it's not gonna make a comeback but it's gonna be interesting it's gonna be like whoa look at this fucking thing from 1999 where they had these silver discs. Check this out. This is earlier this year. This is in July.

The last VCR got made. Wow. Until they start making them again because someone's going to realize they can make a shitload of money. How weird, man. About five years ago, I bought a VCR just because I was like, you know what? This is on its way out. I have tons of VHS tapes. So I'm just going to buy it. They're $29 on Amazon. So I bought a VCR just because I was like you know what this is not this is on its way out I have tons of VHS tapes so I'm just gonna buy it they're $29 on Amazon so I bought one and it's so light nowadays like the technology is

so basic it's like you could just pick put it on like one finger easily you know yeah it's ridiculous how light it is it feels cheap the only one on Amazon now costs 180 bucks whoa fuck That's a DVD player. Well, it's the only one you can get, though. You got to get one that's both? Yeah. Yeah, well, maybe it's telling you. Is it the other one a DVR?

No, just a DVD. Like, what is a good price for a VHS player? They used to be like $50, $60, maybe? They got down to like $29 to $39. But look at these companies that make them. Like Fonan. Have you even heard of that? So did you hear about that thing that they were doing? I've been paying more attention to this now.

I'm trying to figure out what a lot of this was. There was a story that Eddie Bravo actually told me about it first. Where the Pentagon was making fake Al-Qaeda videos and faked like Isis videos and There was this documentary about this We're not documentary but this video online about the company that was involved in making these things It's crazy, dude. It's crazy story come in for a meeting like who am I meeting with no have a seat Okay, you got the job you're going Iraq. They fucking ship this guy off. It's crazy, dude. It's a crazy story. Come in for a meeting. Like, who am I meeting with? No, have a seat. Okay, you got the job.

You're going to Iraq. They fucking chipped this guy off. It's really interesting. Like, this guy talking about being recruited to create these propaganda films for the U.S. government. And what they were was, see, everybody goes, oh, my God, the U.S. government's lying to us. Yeah, definitely not good to have these videos that we think are al-Qaeda but are actually CIA or whoever it is that's doing these things, this propaganda firm. But what's interesting is what they did with it. So there was a thing called RealPlayer.

You remember RealPlayer? Oh, yeah. Yeah. They only streamed it through RealPlayer. So people would go to it. They would stream it and they would get their ip and they would know where they were and so they would know where people who were all grouping up in these uh like radical factions and these radical groups and they would be able to isolate them to a certain extent because of that or at least isolate their location you know so but which is really interesting right it's really interesting

because there's another thing that someone was telling me and this it's i had never considered this forget who fucking said this i want to say it's on the message board but they were talking about all the different factions that were sort of put together to become isis and that they weren't even really necessarily against or together with each other. There was Boko Haram. There's the Taliban. There's Al-Qaeda. There's ISIS.

There's all these different people. But they just sort of lump all these groups in together like we're fighting those fuckers, everybody. And we think of them as an organized group. Like they got together and said, you know what? We got to get together and organize a group and put together our powers. No, they're basically on each other's sides. The whole thing is just a giant group of people that don't like U.S. foreign policy. And we sort of call them whatever we want to call them.

Some of them are ISIS and some of them are Al-Qaeda and some of them are Taliban and and some of them are what they used to be the mujahideen it's crazy right yeah did you watch the debates uh-huh the funniest thing on twitter is the hashtag muslims reporting uh whatever trump says like the muslims need to report things so there's a hashtag of just muslims reporting things like like it's but it's it's all shit like like I farted in a little poop came out Muslims report you know it's hilarious or so they just took over that hashtag yeah they actually made it because it is pretty ridiculous you know that's when he said that so now they're just taking advantage of it to make it funny. And it's, it's hilarious to read.

Oh, uh, Muslims report stuff. Hashtag. Dude, it doesn't even seem real. It really doesn't. I'm,

I'm watching the debate and I was like, this is, it's so strange to watch that this is their choice. This is our choice of who gets to be president. It's like, how did we, what happened here? I, I got really freaked out when he was hovering over her like i don't know what what triggered something in me but i

was like get get away from her let her talk you know like oh he's a big powerful man yeah he's a big looming powerful successful rich man it scares everybody you know. Him hovering over her in that debate, the whole thing was bizarre. It's really bizarre talking to people that watch the same program as you with completely different eyes. I'm in fights with family members over this.

Did you not watch what I watched? I've been tuning to Fox News nonstop. That's all I've been watching. It's so interesting to see how people just fucking form teams, man. They just form teams. They go right or they go left. But they form a team and then they write shit that doesn't necessarily make sense, but it fits within the narrative of their team winning.

And they duke it out back and forth with each other there's a bunch of people that were talking with big smiles about how great trump came away from that debate he had one good line you'd be in jail oh yeah that was a good line yeah because you'd be in jail that was a good line he got her there i mean that was a good line. He got her there. I mean, that was a fucking nice quick one. Got in, got out. Boom. Knockout blow. But the debate itself, man. And then when he kept on saying, like, hey, you know, she did her time interrupting.

While interrupting, he interrupted more and took more time to answer questions. It was like, what world is he living in? He's a strange guy. I hate both of them, but it's really interesting seeing how gross. I feel bad for Billy Bush. I think a lot's going to come out on him now that he's under the microscope. Let me ask you this. Why does there have to be moderators?

Wouldn't it be better to watch the two of them sit down and talk? This is what I think. Watch the two of them sit down and talk? This is what I think. Get Hillary Clinton and Donald Trump, sit them in a room together across a nice table like this, put a camera on the both of them, and let them have a conversation. And let's find out what they're really all about. You know, because everyone's doing, they're broadcasting to you.

Everyone's broadcasting to you, including me right now, which is very ironic. But everyone, that's what they're doing. They're broadcasting to you. Everyone's broadcasting to you, including me right now, which is very ironic. But that's what they're doing. They're broadcasting. But don't you think Donald Trump would overpower her so she can't even talk? We'll learn a lot about him if he does that. We'll learn a lot about him if he does that. And I bet she'll be able to manipulate that and make him look really bad. Look, I think

you get them together, the moderators asking him to answer questions telling her the time is up and all this different jazz that's an added element why am i not talking to her okay i'm not i can't well i'm not there okay well why doesn't he talk to her let's find out what they think about each other let's let let them why why are you going to do it better than me tell me you know why does it have to be fucking bitter, dire enemies every time two people are running for the same position? Can't they recognize that without competition, you know, this is allegedly not the best we can do, right? I think most people think, well, we probably can find a few scientists or doctors or whatever that might do a better job than those two at running the country.

But whatever. Just put that aside. It's, is it, is that the best? Do you think this is the best? There's no way, right? No way. Why don't, just doesn't seem real. You know, even discussing it, I like lose my train of thought because I'm like, I can't believe we're actually sitting here talking about this.

But whatever people do, man, they get on a team and they fucking wave that flag. And it's the team of the right or the team of the left. There's a few people that sort of dangle in between the middles. It's like if you had big giant piles of ants and then there was like a little trail in between those piles of ants that was like kind of thinned out and and then the the pile would be on the left hand side and the pile would be on the right hand side there's a few people that are in the middle there's a few people that are walking back and forth in the middle they don't know which way to go but the vast majority they get on a fucking pile and they decide fucking second amendment or they you know they decide whatever

it is whatever they decide you know fourth amendment you know freedom of speech whatever it is they ride with yep it's like apple pc samsung you know it's like it's that whole thing transgender rights what do you think the chances this happens again in 2020 are the same i don't know she wins and no it's big kan this happens again in 2020 are? The same. I don't know. She wins and him. No, it's going to be Kanye versus Trump in 2020. It's going to be worse.

This is not getting better. Kanye could win. Ugh. He could win. I can't take it. He could win. I can't. Can you imagine having years of Kanye, like Trump shit versus Trump?

He'll win for eight years in a row. I would throw my TV out. If they could have a new election every year. He'd keep winning. Just so people can say President Kanye. Hey, man, is it that bad? I mean, what are we getting into right now? This is bananas.

It doesn't seem real. I mean, I really am feeling more and more every day like we're living in a simulation. And the simulation is revealing itself to us. 100%. A guy named Wiener can't stop showing his dick. Really? How obvious is this goddamn script? 100%.

Who's writing this? It's Eddie Bravo. It's like a 1990s sitcom. Eddie Bravo isn't controlling this. They had Corey Feldman back on the Today Show. Of course they did. Dressed all in gold. He did another crazy performance.

He was talking about America, and then he accidentally threw a flag on the ground. Corey Feldman loses his damn mind again with another Today performance. Well, hey, man, that's how he's staying relevant. He banned me off Twitter after I talked about him last time we talked about him on here. He blocked you? He blocked me. Did he block you? I don't know.

I won't check Corey Feldman's Twitter page ever. Ever. But I'm sure he's a good guy. This is what I'm giving him out here. This is what I'm saying. I'm saying he's just being super outrageous in order to get attention. It's smart. Because otherwise they're not going to pay attention.

It's fucking hard for a guy that's been in movies and had a lot of shit going on that it all kind of goes away. And he's just trying to do it himself. He's trying to figure out some way. Some way to stay an entertainer. I get it. Nothing wrong with it. It's weird. He's doing weird stuff.

But I get. I mean, look, we're. It's weird. He's doing weird stuff. But I get I mean look we're talking about him because he's doing weird stuff. He does questionable things though. Do you think that it's on purpose weird? Or do you think he's just a weird dude and that's the kind of art he likes to make? I mean the whole Feldman Angel thing

really is gross and creepy and awful. So I think he's just untalented and he thinks he's talented like he's that in denial hmm could be a grand andy kaufman-esque performance could be but if you've watched any i mean epic magnitude the album cover for his double disc that he's releasing angelic to the core he's hey rock on cory Feldman. We ain't hating on you, dude. I'm not hating on you. Look at the eraser tool around this. Go have some fun.

That's what he likes, man. He's at a party. He sells $20 videos or something like that. If you pay him PayPal and $20, he'll read something for you. And he does it in characters like when he was in Lost Boys, who has the same jacket on and stuff like that. That's hilarious.

That's hilarious. I forget what's comic. There's one of our buddies just spends like 20 bucks a week just getting a new video. Well, that's probably a smart way to make money. I bet he can churn out

fucking dozens of those in an hour, right? Yeah. If he's just doing that. That's just reminding me of the story I've been hearing recently. I bet he can churn out fucking dozens of those in an hour, right? Yeah. If he's just doing that. That's just reminding me of the story I've been hearing recently. You know, all the Comic-Con conventions, there's not just one now, there's multiple.

They're all over the country. Right. And they have old TV stars come in to be on them. They're making, from what I heard, hundreds of thousands of dollars per convention, leaving with cash and bags. Because it's 20 bucks, it's at least 20 bucks a photo, if not 40 or 50 or 80 if you're signing them. And it's a deal they're making with the photographer that's taking the photo and the convention, and then the person who the actual star is gets the rest of it. And they're making a lot of money like really old

people making and i forget wow i can give you an example well i said this before on the podcast when i saw daisy duke the girl that played daisy duke at a comic convention and she was just sitting there katherine bach yeah she was just sitting there by herself no one who knew who she was just sitting there and then i'm like holy shit daisy duke's just sitting there and so i came up and was like oh can i get a picture and she's like sure it's gonna be 20 bucks and so like she was just making money like i had to use my own camera but she was charging 20 bucks just for to take a picture with her whoa yeah so it was pretty sad uh i just saw that uh that's fucking weird man that's a weird practice right it is it's gross the guy played thor is gonna would earn a little over 350 000

in a weekend robert downey jr would make about 1.5 million for his appearance at comic-con and then like it goes down to say how much like a autograph from john kustak was like 70 bucks but if he's he's probably not there so wait a minute. So these guys go there and take pictures with people for money? Yeah. Like Ralph Macchio costs $40 for a photo op. Ugh. But his co-star, C. Thomas Howell from the outside. What were the ones you were saying in the millions?

You said Robert Downey Jr.? Yeah. Robert Downey Jr. takes pictures of people for money? He's probably not doing that, but that's for him to show up just at the event. Oh, that's his price. So just's for him to show up just at the event. That's his price. So just to get him to show up. And be in the main hall to say, hey, here's the new Avengers trailer. Oh, my goodness.

That's insane. How baller is that guy? That's insane. That's a lot of money, man. God damn. Just to show up. Hey, dude, just come to my thing and I'll give you a million bucks. That's awesome.

Okay, but I'm only talking a couple lines okay good good good it's cool just smile cost like 200 bucks for a ticket for the weekend just to go to domicon just to hang out with everyone that's pretty much what paris hilton does nowadays she just makes appearances and gets shit loads of cash buys nude puppies for ten thousand dollars yeah appearances Yeah, appearances are big, right? It's like the way people who don't have an act perform. They show up. I'm here. Like, just being there is your performance. And now she's a DJ. She literally

just presses play and just waves her arms around for like an hour and that's it. It's good. She probably has someone else do it for her. Like someone else concocts the music or does she concoct her own music? She does she concoct her own music? She just gets a CD and she presses play and turns knobs here and there

to make it look like she's doing some typical DJ stuff nowadays. Hmm. Russell Peters would get angry. He doesn't call that DJing. Oh, yeah, I know. Russell gets furious. I've heard some of the bigger DJs that are making money in Vegas,

they have two fees for an event like that. They have a press play fee, and then they have an actual, like, I'll perform and mix songs fee. Oh, that makes sense. They're both really expensive. That makes sense. I don't have to, like, do that at a comedy show. I have one fee where I just stand there in front of a tape recorder,

and I go like this while my jokes play. That would be hilarious. I pause. I do my whole act like that. They got another fee where I actually do the stand-up. That like that. They got another fever. I actually do stand up. That's cool. So rude.

Have you ever ate one of the hottest peppers in the world? Like any of those peppers? Would you ever eat one of those peppers? I probably try it just to see what the fuss is all about. But I've had some, there was a piece to be a place in Encino called chili my soul And it was just like super awesome Fucking chili place that had like the most legit chili like they had mild chili where it didn't fuck with you at all

But then at the top end of the scale they had like some Himalayan death shit They had some chili that you couldn't even fucking believe a person could eat it and I never even tried 10 they have a 10 apparently they had a 10 but i did try a nine once and i they give you this is how strong the chili is they give it to you in like a thimble and i'm not fucking joking it's like a little tiny cup that you would get ketchup at at a shitty diner those little tiny ones that's what they give you the chili and i put it in my mouth and immediately start hiccuping. Like my body's like freaking out. Tears are pouring down my face. My snot's pouring out of my nose.

And that was like a tiny little bite of this stuff. I was like, what the fuck? My whole tongue was numb. I was like, whoa. The YouTube videos are like ghost peppers. I highly recommend just sitting there and watching this. One of my favorite shows is called Hot Ones. It's like I want to do this show so bad.

I don't know if you've seen it where this guy answers 10 questions. And each one you start off at like Tapatio. Then it gets hotter, each chicken wing. So each one you take a bite of a chicken wing. And then he'll ask you a question, and it starts off to see if you could get all the way to the end. And the end is like the hottest one. So it's really interesting to see who can do it and who can't.

Do you think it's genetic? I don't know. Like Tommy Chung did it. He did it all the way? I think there was some shenanigans. Oh, dear. The first three, he was like, even the tapatio one, he goes, oh they're uh the first three he was like even the tapatio one he goes oh this is hot and he's like whatever but then he gets to the end he wasn't

breaking a sweat where other people are like gagging about the guy no no he's japanese whatever he won't couldn't handle that hot shit he went for it first and like almost started barfing he ate the hot one first and then he touched his dick with it and so anyways you got burke kreischer did one of my favorite episodes. Shout out to Hot Ones. So, Jamie just pulled this up while we were talking. This guy does a bong rip with a Carolina Reaper. A Carolina Reaper is apparently the top of the food chain

when it comes to the hot peppers. One of them, yeah. They say it's the hottest. Is it? I thought it was that other one, but I think I read recently yeah i thought i think i read recently the carolina reaper is the hottest see i want to know is would that really do anything though you're burning it you know i don't know if that would actually this might be a fucking

bullshit until oh what is he doing it's just a gif of exactly what happens to me the second after he takes the hit it's like three minutes of him coughing, and snot starts flying out of his nose. Oh, let's watch. Shit. Literally have something better to do? I don't think this is. Go full screen, please. Don't let anybody see it.

So this guy's got the Carolina Reaper. Here's, if you want to watch it online, Ted Barris bong r got the Carolina Reaper. Here's, if you want to watch it online, Ted Barris bong rips the Carolina Reaper. And then asterisk puke warning. Original video. Here he goes. This guy's just telling you. I'm going to fucking take a Carolina Reaper.

Oh, Jesus. And I'm going to bong rip one. Oh, my goodness. I don't think that would do anything. Let's try it and find out. Fuck that. Let us know. I am a professional, though, when it comes to bong rips.

I'm a bud tender, so... Bud tender? Bud tender. Ew. Don't say that again. Bong ripping things. Bud tender? Come on.

Bud tender. Is that what they're calling them now? That's like that barista at Starbucks. I have issues with that. It's like the guy at the restaurant that wants to get really fancy with the wines and explain to you. The sommelier that wants to get really crazy and tell you what part of the world it's growing in.

Why the grapes are so important there. I'm a bud tender. Well, okay, this is going to give you that stony high. The most important thing here is no more than three hits. Dude, trust me. I know you like to go deep. Trust me.

Three hits and you'll be beautiful. You'll be mellow. And they just, this is more like an earthy, nutty sort of. They always tell me, like, the girls are like, I always smoke this and I start cleaning my whole house. It makes me so energetic. Bitch, you ain't cleaning your own ass. Liar.

There is definitely some weed I've had that makes me feel like cleaning my little house. Well, you just look around and you go, what am I doing with my fucking life? Yeah. Edibles do that to me. Edibles freak me out, man. I had a bad edible the other day. Everybody does. If you take edibles, you're going to have bad. But the good side of those

is almost every time I've had a bad one, I come out of it and I realize whatever was bothering me, like whatever issues or whatever paranoia, whatever weirdness, I look at it from a different way. I look at it in a better way. Oh, here he is.

See, I don't believe this. That's not real. Bad acting. Oh, he's going to keep digging. I don't know. Have you ever hit some really harsh weed that just immediately tastes terrible? Yeah, well, here's the thing, man. We don't know that the oils from the pepper are transmitted in the air.

We really don't know. And that looks like overacting from a hillbilly. Maybe a little bit, but he's trying to get some views, too. He knows what he's doing with that, but it's still like... No, man, he might be seriously experiencing the oils. I mean, do you think the oils from the pepper, that's where the heat is. You think you can carry in the smoke? Must be, right?

Something. If it can transmit just from your skin to your dick. Right, of course. That's a good point. Yeah, this guy's fucked. This is real, dude. Maybe. Yeah, I think this guy's fucksville. It doesn't seem's a good point. Yeah, this guy's fucked. This is real, dude. Maybe. Yeah, I think this guy's fucksville.

It doesn't seem like a good idea either. Yeah. Anyway, watch this video. Support it. Give it a view, folks. Don't go smoking Carolina Reef, you dumbasses. There's this one guy that does it at Vegas. He walks around on the streets in Vegas and goes,

Hey, will you eat one of these peppers? It's the hottest peppers. You can eat it. I'll give you $20. And it's just destroying people's lives here, like families. I'll do it for $20. I'd like a little hot spicy pepper. But they're eating those peppers and just puking and crying.

Is it toxic? It's not. You could probably get sued. Yeah, but I mean, is it toxic? It's not. You could probably get sued for... Yeah, but I mean, is it toxic to the person? I mean, is a person eating a Carolina Reaper, is that toxic? This is the guy. What is it? What does it say there?

Paying people to eat the world's hottest pepper. This guy's a complete asshole, too. Well, I think you have to be if you're having people eat the world's hottest pepper. He's holding this guy's at the end of this video. He acts like such a dick to this chick that made me hate this guy What he's like a prick? I think I've seen another video of his there's a couple like he's a prankster that does stiff on the street and the strip in Vegas he might be getting away with actual can't you do you do things in Vegas? Yeah. Yeah, that's why What was the the Comedy Central show? Okay cranking we don't see people throw up anymore he might be getting away with actual, can't you do, uh, you can do things in Vegas. Yeah. Yeah. That's why,

uh, what was the, the comedy central show? Okay. We don't have to see people throw up anymore. Yeah. Cranky anchors. Yeah. Cranky anchors.

Yeah. They used to do that in Vegas. Cause you could just call people up. Yeah. That's, that's the problem with TV. And nowadays is half these shows are like that, but they're all like,

there's a show. I don't want to say what it is. I don't want to say what network it is on because people hate me so much when I talk shit on this network. But the show is a prank show where they pay all the people in it so that all the people that are getting pranked know they're getting pranked. But they sell it as a real show, and it drives me crazy. Well, how do you know they know they're getting pranked before the prank happens? Because I know somebody that did it, let's just say. He got paid to be a, okay, so we're going to come in here, we're going to make a fart sound, and you're going to, you know, like.

Really? Yeah, and it's on a channel that's. Yeah. Yeah. Huh. I just hate that shit. That's why. How do they get away with that?

They say it's a scripted show? Do they say written by? I don't know. Probably. with that uh they say it's a scripted show they say written by i don't know probably or do you think they just hope that well is it like here's the question right is that different than like see that's a prank a prank is like almost like a sketch right so if you have a setup sketch like that that's a bigger deception than a reality show where you already know what you're going to do during that day. Right?

Right. Like, what's a reality show like, oh, we're all going to go to the football game. You know, my son's playing football. Today's his big day. And all the cameras there, yay, go Mickey and everybody cheers. Like, they know that they were going to do that. But it is at least technically like a real thing you can do it's a real thing meaning like they were going to do it if the cameras were there or not exactly but they know the cameras are there so i i consider that like duh they know the cameras are there i've accepted this i can but

it's like real like the one of my favorites is the prophet yeah but it's a lie though all of it is a lie it's different than the other thing is the other thing is like they're going to the game yeah yeah we're cheering we're aware of the cameras we're acting we're because it but the other one you're pretending that you didn't know that that fart sound was playing yeah it's like it's not really acting like you're you're being deceptive yeah this is deceptive right like it's not you guys aren't doing a sketch about a prank show you're doing an actual prank show right there's only the only one reason to watch an actual prank show is to see people legitimately get what what do you mean what is that like people come up to people and a lot of people act in weird ways you've had someone come up to you and you don't know who they are, and they touch you, and they got their hands on you?

You're like, whoa, whoa, whoa, who are you? What's this? Yes. What's going on? So people get weird and defensive. Like, that's a real prank show. That's why, like, Ali G in his prime, in that Ali G character, some of the all-time best prank interviews ever. I mean, some of his shit was fucking hilarious now could you imagine if you found out

those people on the other side were in on it like remember he didn't you do him with Ron Paul mm-hmm he did one with Buzz Aldrin yeah How did you tell if the moon is made out of cheese? You know? I forgot about that. He had a bunch of like ridiculous fucking interviews with people

where they just they couldn't they had no idea they thought he was a guy from an MTV show that had come to do interviews with him. Check it.

You know, he was the best. He was the best. If you found out those were all fraudulent wouldn't you be mad yeah and that's what i'm saying that's why it pisses me so off like i that's one of the things that drives me crazy about this network because they have a lot of these shows just like that where they're selling it things that but is that okay if it's good

it's not good when you know it's fake though you. You can tell it's fake. A lot of the actors are such bad actors that you don't even need to know somebody that's working on it. You just watch and go, oh, God, could they at least got good actors? You know, like, it's that bad. It's garbage TV. I hate garbage TV. But maybe in a way, maybe in a way it's good. If you're really that stoned, I guess it's good. Yeah, maybe in a way it's good if you're really that stone i guess it's good yeah maybe in a way it's good because it's so stupid like there's a show that i like have you seen impractical jokers

no i haven't not but i've heard it's really good stanhope likes it very funny and what if they keep doing it really bad what i'm saying is like if if it sucks i don't know it sucks because i haven't seen it but if it sucks as hard as't know it sucks because I haven't seen it, but if it sucks, as hard as you say it sucks, some things that suck become awesome. They suck, and then you go to see them later, or you see them when you're high, or you go to see them knowing that they suck, like Showgirls. Remember Showgirls?

God damn, dude, that's one of my all-time favorite ridiculous movies. That's totally different, though. Right. You know what I'm saying? Troll 2, it's like the worst movie ever made. Everyone loves it or something. I saw that. There's like a documentary about it.

It's so stupid, dude. It's so stupid, but it's awesome. You know? But they have to be shitty on accident. Like Waterworld. Like a movie that, worse way worse the postman and you got to give him credit because you know kevin costner is the man and he did wyatt erp which i really liked he did dances with wolves dance water world you're gonna have a few

fuck-ups in there bro just uh didn't work out but what happened my point was i haven't seen costner in a while he's doing a bunch i think he's doing some new thing for hbo i believe too it can't be on purpose you can't make something bad yes you can't make something bad on purpose my point being like a movie like showgirls and there's there's a few other ones you could go back to but roadhouse in a lot of ways. I fucking love Roadhouse. But it's so dumb. It's so dumb. When you watch it, it's awesome. It becomes really good.

It goes away from being like just a statement. Like just a badass action movie. And it becomes a comedy. Like it really does morph. Especially over time. Because what it's like is like something you had a plant and it had to grow and as culture grew around roadhouse roadhouse is in a lot of

ways it's a time capsule because it captures how fucking ridiculous people were in the year that it was made where you will let you you you could see what people accepted back then. You could see how lame the script is, how ridiculous the dialogue is, how preposterous the fucking plot is. There's a bad guy. I've been screwing this town over, and I'm going to keep screwing them over.

You've been screwing up this town for too long. I'm going to keep screwing them over, too. Yeah! It's so bad that it becomes awesome. this town for too long. I'm going to keep screwing them over too. Yeah. It's so bad that it becomes awesome. Are you worried about the potential new one they're going to make? Yeah. And the thought behind it might be they're going to try to make something badly awesome again, but... Sharknado it.

Bad intentions. Here's what I think. I think you piggyback, and this is coming from a guy who did the man show 2 version 2 me and stanhope but i think you piggyback on when you when you're you're confined to the idea like you piggyback on the love that the original roadhouse had right because it's a classic movie you piggyback on that love and you're already in a deficit it's like the ghostbusters thing you know which by the way wasn't a good movie it was a classic movie. You piggyback on that love and you're already in a deficit. It's like the Ghostbusters thing, which, by the way,

wasn't a good movie. It was a good movie for a little bit, though. There was some funny shit in Ghostbusters, but then it got monotonous and I didn't enjoy the end. I thought you told me you loved it.

I love some parts of it. I bought it based on your recommendation. I did not say I loved it. I definitely did not say I loved it. It just wasn't a good show. At the end of it, I was like, wow, this is like, it seems like too many people fucked with it. It's like one of those things where sometimes you look at a movie

and you go, what? So much going on here. So much special effects. Like, the special effects were so monumental. The one at the end that used to be the donut guy or the Pillsbury Doughboy in the original Ghostbusters, that fucking thing is taken to this crazy new CGI level where they're going into, spoiler alert, they're

going into other dimensions, retrieving their friends, and it's fucking craziness. Fucking craziness. But there were some funny moments in the beginning of that movie where I laughed pretty hard. I was like, this is a funny fucking movie. But then it just lost its way, I felt. But it's hard to make a movie, man. I bought that Godzilla movie that came out like two years ago. That was dog shit.

You didn't like it? I thought it was okay, the guy from Breaking Bad in it and stuff. He was great. He's great in everything. Yeah. But I was like, God, it's so corny. You know they're making another one, right? Oops.

This one's being made by, I think it's being made in Japan. So it's like the way they originally made Godzilla. Here's my problem with it. I shouldn't say it's corny because I love monster movies and I definitely don't want to discourage monster movies and I'll absolutely see it next time it comes out. The problem is, there's a dude in this movie, spoiler alert,

the original Godzilla, not the original but the most recent one, the one with the guy from Breaking Bad. There's a dude that keeps fucking surviving. This guy, I mean, he falls off buildings. He's in earthquakes. They dig him out of the bottom of the fucking earth. He's dust himself off. I'm going to go fight Godzilla.

His fucking family's waiting back for him. It's a tornado of cliches that literally makes you travel back in time to the 1960s. It's so corny. They look at each other in the eye at some point, too. Oh, it's so corny. Yeah, well, it's also a big green monster. Yeah, but I think you could do that big green monster with the kind of people that write Game of Thrones. Yeah.

Or the kind of people that are writing this Westworld show holy shit Westworld is started it good. What is it? Ed fucking Harris is playing the Yul Brynner character from the movie Westworld from 1973 and Now they made a series of it on HBO and it's amazing. People are like, it's not even amazing. Fuck you.

You're fucking terrible tasting shows. I tell you. Listen, it's fucking good. This is a really good show. It's complex. It's weird. There's all these patterns that you don't expect. There's a lot of weird shit going on.

It's a strange kind of violence because it's like a robot violence. Robot? Yeah. Dude, this movie is a trip, or this show, rather, is a trip. Oh, cool. And it just keeps getting better. They spent like $25 million on this. Oh, Hopkins.

Yeah. Anthony Hopkins is in it. Ed Harris is fucking fantastic in this show. He freaks me out at home. I'm at home, and I'm on my couch. I'm like, please don't let that boogeyman come get me. Ed Harris, you forget what a bad motherfucker he is until you watch this show. Wow, this looks really interesting.

I thought it was just a cowboy show. No, no, no, no. It's about Westworld. The movie Westworld was all about a place where you would go, where you'd have these shoot-em-ups with robots, and the robots eventually smarten up and rebel. Wow. And that's what this show is about. It's fucking, there's Ed Harris.

Dude, I'm telling you, I kind of forgot how good of an actor Ed Harris is. You watch him in this movie, and you're like, this guy's one of the most untalked-about best actors ever He's so creepy in this fucking show I'm watching this tonight, dude. He's so good. It freaks me out like I really believe him You know I really believe he's a psychotic madman that can't be killed It's fucking awesome man. It's really good. I recommend Mr. Robot, but everybody said that to you. Yeah, I don't have that time.

I don't have time for that nonsense. You would love it. It's right up your alley, I promise. I have time for one robot. Here's the thing. This is the problem with movies like Godzilla. No disrespect to Godzilla. Again, I love a good monster movie.

I watched The Fucking Wolfman with Benicio Del Toro like five times. I didn't even like it. I thought it was corny, but I watched it like five times just because i love a fucking werewolf movie it's fun it's cool when you when you do movies like godzilla and you have these kind of you know really cookie cutter cliche cbs drama type you know what i mean like it's like that like a show it's not a bad show but like a tv show it's kind of obvious what's happening and then they wrap it up nice and tight at the end and you have to compete against game of thrones game of thrones which goes season it's like a movie every week and it goes season after season of chaos and awesomeness and amazing

writing like you can't just have that dude living over and over again, getting trampled by Godzilla. Oh, I'm fine. Let me just... Fucking this fucking dinosaur up. This dude just keeps getting his ass kicked. He's falling out of helicopters into the ocean, swim to shore, and fuck up Godzilla.

He just keeps surviving, and it's driving me nuts. He doesn't even have a coma, no concussion, no broken bones broken bones yeah I fucked up my neck in the shower once dude okay I turned around to try to grab some shampoo and I pops up my neck and I had a drive to Vegas that day and I drove to Vegas like this this fucking dude's getting launched off the top of buildings and dinosaurs are chasing him and in the end he sticks around to watch the fight out between Godzilla. You know how bad you'd be shitting your fucking pants if you were

in a boat off the coast of Seattle and a 600 pound lizard was duking it out with another 600 pound lizard and they're fucking going to war with fire breath and one of them opens up the other one's head and blows fire into it spoiler you would not be sitting there going yeah Godzilla go get that thing's gonna

fuck you up too stupid it's gonna fuck up everything it's not gonna care about these ants in these buildings you wouldn't be watching that you can't say out you can't say those people wouldn't be screaming and crying and spasming and snot pouring down their nose and terrified because their eyes must be deceiving them they're watching a 600 foot lizard that lives in the ocean and blows fire out of its fucking mouth and it's knocking over buildings like they're little cardboard boxes. What? You're just sitting off the coast watching this? You'd be shitting your pants. There's not enough cool in the world to just sit there and watch that. You'd be like, fuck, how far is Australia? Fuck, fuck, fuck! You'd just get to a plane or to a boat. You'd get in a traffic jam. People would die. They would

run over each other and not care. They would trample each other like a fire in a building all throughout the land to get the fuck away from a 600 foot fire-breathing lizard. So until you show that in the movies, you have failed us in this...

You have failed us in this... You have failed us in this... This portrayal. What were you going to say? This movie actually just came out yesterday. What? That Godzilla movie I was just showing. No, but that's the fake one. That's the...

Yeah, that's... That's the one with the dudes. It's like a nostalgia. That's the Japanese one. The guys are wearing suits. Yeah. But it's still good. It's just a different kind.

It's like the original Godzilla good. Ha. I would like to see that. That's kind of cool. Oh, no. It actually got good reviews and it looks really cool Look the movie Godzilla and the idea of Godzilla is very fun the ocean is fucking huge folks and There's whales in it Right. Okay. So we know that there's something as big as a Godzilla, sort of.

Not really. Like, what's a big whale? How many hundreds of feet is a big whale? There's the size comparison of the Godzillas, of all of them. Yeah, they all get bigger. We need bigger. We need double-doubles and big gulps. Double-doubles.

We need big gulps in our Godzillas. What did I just ask you, Jamie? Whale. Oh, yeah. how big is the biggest whale what's the sperm is it a sperm whale a blue whale blue whale how much 170 meters 98 feet okay wow wow okay so that's still quite a bit smaller than Godzilla. But if a whale can be real and a whale is 93 feet long and you are 5'8". Okay, so we know one thing can be way bigger, right? Because I'm 5'8", but my daughter is a hamster. And that little fucker fits in my hand. So, let's start thinking here. What's to stop something from getting Godzilla-sized?

So far, we haven't really seen anything other than the dinosaurs, but they never really got Godzilla-sized either. But it doesn't mean that it couldn't happen. I mean, someone probably has an argument against the gravity effect on something that large, like how much mass you'd have to be moving around,

how big your muscles and bones would have to be. Don't they say that that happens to certain animals at a certain size? It just becomes impractical due to the environment of Earth. And that's one of the things that they thought was the reason why the dinosaurs were so huge, was that the atmosphere might have been different then. And that it might have been a different kind of atmosphere that allowed them to move more easily. Which is really fascinating, right? More oxygen.

Maybe. Well, I think it was way warmer, right? Wasn't that, it was real tropical, I think they think, during the dinosaur days? Obviously not everywhere. I'm sure they probably had polar ice caps even back then. But I think the temperature in the Jurassic and the other – here we go here. Dinosaur era at five times today's CO2. There you go. Huh.

Wow. Listen to that, folks. Okay. So they knew a world. The dinosaurs that roamed the earth 250 million years ago knew a world with five times more carbon dioxide than present on Earth today. Researchers say, and new techniques for estimating the amount of carbon dioxide on prehistoric Earth may help scientists predict how Earth's climate may change in the future. Fuck, dude, we're going to have dinosaurs. We fucked up.

We fucked up. We had coal power plants, and we're're gonna have dinosaurs. We fucked up. We fucked up We had coal power plants and we're gonna make dinosaurs Those lizards are just gonna keep getting bigger and bigger and all the liberals are gonna go we have to keep them alive Because they're an important part of our ecosystem and they are our scaly friends Okay there and then the alligators just keep getting bigger and alligators get to to be like 30 feet long. And people go, hey, what's going on? Why are the alligators so big? Like, they're getting bigger. Do you guys know?

No, no, no. These are just unusual examples. These are outliers. These are outliers of our scaly friends. And, you know, I don't size shame as a human or with animals. And big alligators don't. Next thing you know, alligators are 300 feet long. And they're just smashing through buildings, eating your kids. with animals and big alligators don't next you know alligators are 300 feet long and they just

smashing through buildings eating your kids jurassic park was technically real well what if alligators keep grow like my story that i'm talking about right now i know it's not too far off of that like would you go visit it i want to keep talking about my story jesus jamie i don't know man i'm just saying that at one point in time, if alligators keep getting bigger, they're going to have to say, okay, they're too big. We've got to kill them. Yeah. We can't have them wandering around if they're 50 feet long and they just want to kill people. We can't do that, right?

So my point is they accept alligators up to a certain size. Like right now, alligators like that alligator on the golf course video, which got like millions and millions of hits. That alligator is like 15 feet long. Like that alligator is like on the border. Like, okay, we're letting that thing live. Well, you don't let this 15 foot long monster just roam around and everybody's like, hey, we always have before. Okay. Okay. Okay. We're cool. We're cool. But if he's 30 feet long, you're not going to be out there, right? If he's 90 feet long, like a fucking whale, you're not going to be out there. No one's going to be out whale, you're not going to be out there.

No one's going to be out there, and you're not going to be safe. That's a giant carnivore. So my point was, when do we shoot that thing? I don't know. Would you shoot it, or would you capture it? SCI World Record Stokes. Is that Stokes or Stakes? Stokes.

Stokes? Stokes alligator. What's a Stokes alligator? Is that a type of alligator? Maybe. No. Stokes alligator. What's a Stokes alligator? Is that a type of alligator? 15 feet, 9 inches long. Holy shit. God. Oh, see, that's an SCI.

You know what that means? That's Safari Club International. That's like, it might be. Make sure that I'm correct there. But that's like, that's one of those organizations that measures the largest animals of each species that were killed hunting. So that might be what that is. See if that's right. Is that the SCI?

What is Stokes? Why does it keep saying? Oh, their name. Mandy Stokes. Told the website. Yeah. yeah oh yeah they killed it they killed that thing there it goes so that she went through the range of emotions as they first stalked the animal before baiting it or battling it and killing it finally struggling to take it and finally struggling to take it back to shore how weird alligator meat is supposed to be super good for you which is really kind of crazy right you look at that thing like how could you eat that fucking thing but apparently their tails

are delicious you just have to uh prepare it properly and you get it like right off the alligator didn't that place hunt those things didn't that place we used to always go to in You just have to prepare it properly and you get it like right off the alligator. Didn't they hunt those things? Didn't that place we used to always go to in Texas have like alligator soup? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Joey's favorite place. Papados? Papados.

Was it Papados? Yeah, Papados. And the hotel was right next door. Right, right, right. There's more than one does. There's like a Papados and there's a seafood one and the Cajun one, right? Mm-hmm. There's a steakhouse.

It's like a bunch of chains, right? Yeah, it's a chain, yeah. Yeah, I think if you get alligator, you've got to get it from someone who shot the alligator. I think or get it from a chef that knows how to get it when it's really fresh. It's supposed to be amazing. It's a really uncomfortable subject for people at what point in time are we in danger and what what point in time do we step in like if grizzly bears just start wandering the streets and eating people are we going to have the same feeling that we have about them in the woods no we're not going to so we're going to have to do something then right yeah okay i just checking

i just want to check i just want to know what team you're on i'm not we're going to have to do something then, right? Yeah. Okay. I'm just checking. I just want to check. I just want to know what team you're on. I'm not saying we need to go to the woods and clean out the grizzly bears. I just want to know if the grizzly bears come to Burbank, okay, we can stop that, right? We can shoot them, right? If the grizzly bears just start eating people in Burbank, you're on team people, right?

Okay. I'm not saying we should kill them in the Yellowstone. Hey, live and let live. Let those big giant monsters go wander through the woods. Have a good time. Eat your hiker. Occasional. Occasional hiker.

Just stay the fuck out of San Francisco. Right? If grizzlies started wandering through San Francisco. Fuck that. Dude, I was in this town near Bakersfield called Lebec. And it's named after a dude named Peter Lebec, who was purportedly the last man in California to get killed by a grizzly bear. So I went to the website to read about this dude. And as we're reading it, I'm reading that his feet were bitten off.

This is not funny. I know it's not funny. Jesus. His feet were bitten off. is not funny I know it's not funny His feet were bitten off One of his hands was gone This bear just Fucked him up And uh they named the town after him

After the guy died Like in his honor they named this town After the last guy To get killed by a grizzly bear So like people that go hey You know they've ruined California The grizzly bear it's like people that go hey you know they've ruined california the grizzly bear is extinct from california listen to me listen to me let montana have the fucking grizzlies you don't want them here just trust me i know they seem so romantic

they seem so lovely when you're on television, that's great. And there's a spot for them on Earth, that's great too. But this idea of bringing them back, like, what do you want to be, one of those pioneers that's scared to get to your fucking recyclable bin in the middle of the night? You're terrified because your neighborhood is filled with bears and lions and shit? The fuck out of here. That's ridiculous. 30-foot-long crocodiles wandering down your neighborhood? No.

No. You've got to shoot wandering down your neighborhood? No. No. Gotta shoot those things, god damn it. They found the story of him because it was written into a tree? Did you read that? What? Say what? Say what? I'm looking up

the story about him. He keeps talking about this inscription written on a tree that was found when people were passing through in the 1850s. Whoa. Do you think if we didn't have teddy bears as kids, we would not be so attached to bears? Oh, for sure. Oh, that's right.

There was a story written on the tree, and then they dug him up, and his bones were that way, torn apart. Wow. Yeah, that's exactly what it was. Now that I refresh my memory, I'd forgotten it was written somewhere. I didn't know it was on a tree. I thought it was a note.

That's insane. Fuck bears, dude. Seriously, fuck them. And again, I'm not for eradicating bears, ladies and gentlemen. I just want to be clear. I love them. I'm glad they exist. They're cool.

Just like lions are cool. I don't want lions in Burbank. You know, a whole Cecil the Lion thing. Let's not get carried away, folks. Let's not. Don't bring them over here. Don't get crazy. There's a guy who wants to bring them over to England.

Do you know the guy who is the When Wolves Created Rivers guy? The guy where the wolves changed rivers? He made this really cool documentary or a video that shows what the it's been criticized i don't know who's right but to me it's interesting and it makes a lot of really cool points and one of the things was that these wolves and they reintroduced into the yellowstone they started killing the elk and killing the deer and that allowed a lot of the plants to grow better which allowed a lot of the rivers to change the course of the rivers because the root system got stronger.

And all these other animals survived and thrived. They all did better because they weren't the prey of the wolf, but they were benefiting from the elk and the deer not being around anymore. And so it's really cool to see how when they introduce a predator predator into an area it's almost like you're watching a mathematical program like you introduce this and it's a really controversial subject because a lot of elk hunters in particular were really mad when they brought these wolves in because they killed half the elk population they chopped them down to 50 but some people think that is probably overall healthy for the actual animals themselves. It's like a more honest life. It's not really honest for these wild cows and undulates to not have any predators. They've never had that all throughout history. So our idea that we're going to like eliminate all the predators and they're just going to run wild. That's crazy. Like that's how you get like Michigan where people are fucking hitting them with cars to the tune of a million years I'm was it no one was it 1.5 million in the whole country for a year, right?

200 people dead from colliding with deer You know so like wolves wolves are important bears are important. They're interesting. They're fucking fascinating man I'm so glad they're around But don't get crazy man i'm so glad they're around but don't get crazy don't get fucking the coyotes in my neighborhood it's getting out of hand and the crows and coyotes out of control i love coyotes man i do they're fucking cool i mean i remember the first time i saw one i was staying at the um what is those uh furnished apartments? The Oakwoods.

You know the Oakwoods everybody gets when you first move to Hollywood? I was staying at one of those things, man. I was driving to the apartment, and I saw these fucking dogs running down the street, like little German shepherds. And it was the first time I'd ever seen a coyote, and I realized, holy shit, these are coyotes. How weird is this? These are little wild predators. Just small enough that we let them stay. Just small enough. If they were hyenas,

we would be gunning them down from the top of buses, right? If hyenas were roaming down the street, tearing apart dogs and shit, we'd be terrified. But hyenas are just dicky enough to slip under the radar. Like, they eat a cat every now and then. Don't leave your cat out, bro.

I'm going to eat your fucking cat. We, like, tolerate that this little predator will eat your dog. Like, he'll snatch your dog right out of your yard and hop over the fence with him. You got to deal with that. I saw one kill my chicken. I saw it. Saw that fucker hop over the fence with my chicken in its mouth.

But I still love them I love them because they're like they're like little criminals like skirt in the system they're just scary enough that you don't want your kids to be around them but you're not scared of them they're little skittish they probably fuck you up if they wanted to like if I coyote really came after you you'd probably have a real problem you probably have a real problem. You'd probably have a real problem. It's like a dog, right?

It's a lot like a dog. But sharp teeth. Yeah. But they're more survival oriented. They'd be scared. If you put up a good fight, like if you booted a coyote in the head, if you got a good roundhouse kick, you know, if you're like a Chuck Liddell, like if a coyote tries to fuck with Chuck Liddell, and Chuck Liddell kicks that fucking thing in the head, that coyote's going to run. He's going to go, what was that? Fuck this.

That's never happened to me before. And they'll just take off. Even if he doesn't knock them unconscious, they'll just run and get the fuck away. But they'll kill you if you're small. If you're a little kid, coyotes will kill you. They don't have any morals. The only thing they look, is there people people around can i get away with this i'm gonna do it that's what they do they don't have any rules they're goddamn wild animals do you remember that 19 year old singer who was killed in canada a few years back she's a folk

singer she's killed by coyotes really dude it's ugly because they found her she was still alive oh god but here's the thing about coyotes dude they start eating you ass first that's right i remember that do you have any idea how horrific it must be for a coyote to pull your guts out through your asshole while you're screaming and no one can hear you and you're in the woods that is a demon. It's just a demon that only attacks occasionally. If coyotes weren't a real thing and there was a murder where a demon from hell came out of the ground and ate a 19-year-old aspiring folk singer, threw her asshole, ate her, ripped her guts out, tore her apart, and then the demon just disappeared and went into space.

And we knew that he was going to come back in 30 years. That town would live in terror. Live in terror of the possibility of something that could commit that kind of an act would return. Like it would be looming over us. We'd prepare. We'd have armor and shit. Be waiting for the 30 years to come. Meanwhile, they're outside checking out your mail.

They're sniffing around your garbage cans. You hear their nails? Click, click, click, click, click, click. My security camera gets them once in a while. Of course it does. Creepy. Of course it does, man. Yeah, they're everywhere. They're everywhere. I'm having a guy come on soon that is a wildlife biologist that's studying

we're trying to coordinate a date. He's studying coyotes that live in the city and surprisingly healthy populations of coyotes that live in the city. That's crazy. Yeah, there's a lot of them, man. They find places where they can sleep. They find places where no one's going to fuck with them. And then that's their spot.

And then they venture out at night or venture out at dusk. And they've just figured out a way to fucking avoid people bothering them. But they live in cities, man. It's weird. Everybody just gets out of their car. They get in their house. Get in your car. Drive off to work.

You go down here. You go down there. How often are you checking that weird alleyway behind your apartment building? How often are you checking that place? Is anybody checking that checking that place you know there's like trees back there for no reason and behind that there's a fence you ever go look in there it's where coyotes live motherfucker if you don't go there for a certain amount of time they find that spot they sniff around like these dumb fucks don't come here anymore and they'll just they'll use that and they find these spots all around the city apparently. It's pretty cool.

It's like a weird animal that's just small enough that will let it hunt near us. I wish there was foxes, more foxes around us. Foxes are pretty dope. You see that video of the fox laughing? No. This guy, I guess, has

a fox. Oh, a pet fox? Pet fox. And the guy would just be like ha ha ha ha ha of the fox laughing? No. This guy, I guess, has a fox. Oh, a pet fox? A pet fox. And the guy would just be like, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. And the fox just goes, hee, hee, hee, hee, hee, hee. It's so weird. It's such a weird video. Yeah, this.

Look at that. That's a fox. Oh, it's a pet. It's got a collar on and everything. That's a fox? Yeah. Look at him. He's so cute. Oh, my God.

He's laughing. Whoa. That's a hilarious sound. It rolls over. Fox is probably so happy. He's inside a house getting free food. He doesn't have to go out there and earn, you know. Did you ever see the video of the fox with the grizzly man?

When grizzly man was up in the woods and the fox and him became buddies. Yeah. It's really beautiful footage. I think, honestly, like, I know I make fun of that movie a lot because that guy was out of his fucking mind. And that's another unintentional comedy.

This is another perfect example of something that's not supposed to be funny, but it's goddamned hilarious. And no disrespect to this guy who got eaten by the bear. No disrespect. Because I think he really did do a lot of great stuff. I think he was a little delusional with his idea that he was saving these bears. But what he did do is got amazing, incredible, up-close footage of grizzly bears.

Involved in all sorts of crazy shit. of grizzly bears involved in all sorts of crazy shit like he he captured grizzly bear wars at like really close range and he did a great job and he developed friendships with these animals like this little fox right here this fox just comes right up to him man and is hanging out with him at one point it steals his hat and playfully runs off with it and he's like hey give me that hat back and the fucking the fox isn't scared of a man the fox just thinks it's funny like why would the fox take the hat he's just rolling around and biting on it it's really adorable and the grizzly man gets mad so he goes chasing after the fox and it was just like weird moment of camaraderie between two life forms that are just hanging out in the woods together like that thing accepted him into its community man

it's really interesting another interesting thing is that wolves killed one of those foxes while he was there oh really they got a hold of that fox. It tore it apart. They don't want any competing predators. Same with coyotes. Coyotes. Coyotes. Coyote. Same with coyotes. They don't want competing predators.

That's apparently the main reason why they kill cats. They don't even kill them to eat them as much as they kill them because they don't want any predators that are competing for the same things they're competing for. So he got this amazing footage of him running after this fox, hanging out with this fox. He was like buddies with this little fox. And then when the fox kid got eaten by the wolf,

he found a paw. And you're like, whoa, this world is gangster. These little crazy animals make friends with this nutty guy who's camped out in a tent. And while he's camped out in that tent, in the middle of the night, the wolves come into town and tear one of those foxes apart.

And he's crying. And he said, I heard the screams. I heard the howls. I heard the wolves. I'm like, what in the fuck are you living through, dude? Like, you're having monster wars

in your yard. I need to re-watch that movie. It's so good. I even remember these parts. fuck are you living through, dude? You're having monster wars in your yard. I need to re-watch that movie. It's so good. I remember the whole Fox a little. I've seen it way too many times. I've seen that fucking movie 15 times. I watch it on planes and I'm bored.

If I'm bored, I'm going to watch this shit again. Did you see that report that there's like 1,300 Chinese old ladies, old people go missing every day? There's this whole thing where old people just are missing. Daily, 1,300 Chinese old people. Wait a minute, so this is recent? Yeah. Oh, no.

They're saying it's up to 500,000 old people go missing every year in China. What? And so there's all these theories like they become food and the government takes them because it costs so much money. Oh, no. That's a lot. I know. 500,000 American old people?

500,000 a year. Okay, how many people go missing in America every year? How many old people go missing in America every year? Let's see if there's a difference. I think 500,000 seems like a lot, but China has a billion. In China, it's 80%. 80% of what? People that, missing people.

80% of missing people are old? Yeah, yeah. Over people are old? Yeah. Yeah. Over 75. No. Yeah. What? Oh my God, they're killing old people.

That's what I'm saying. Oh my God. They kill babies and old people. Oh my God, that's so insane. On average in the USA, there's only 90,000 missing persons at any given time. Okay. On average in the USA, there's only 90,000 missing persons at any given time. Okay, 90,000 missing persons, but in their defense, China has probably three plus times more people than we do. So, shouldn't still...

Under 300,000 if that was the equivalent. But that's close. That's close, and you consider the fact that they live in a really rural place, and a lot of the areas are very rural. Do they have predators? They have bears, right? China has some bears. What else do they have? What kind of predator?

Hey, just Google what kind of shit eats people in China, and they'll say Chinese people. Yeah, Chinese. It's just the infinity sign. Yeah, just a few cannibals. It's very rare, but we got a few guys that would be a weird thing to find out how many people in America are eating people right now

and if America has 90,000 missing people how percent of that is old people probably only like a small amount I'm guessing what are you googling here buddy I googled exactly what you said what kind of weird shit meets people in China

meat made from poop we shouldn't say shit I didn't really mean shit. I know. I was being silly. You should actually Google predators of humans in China. Sorry. I had to be more specific.

Ladies and gentlemen, I just want to announce right now, we were way too high to start this podcast when we did. So thanks for hanging in there. We've come back around. Everybody's okay now. I was too high to start this podcast when we did. So thanks for hanging in there. We've come back around. Everybody's okay now. That was too high. Do they have predators? Is there maybe a thing that old ladies get scooped up by pterodactyls or some shit?

Imagine if pterodactyls were real. We'd have to shoot them out of the sky. You can't be an alligator that can fly. Right? Agreed? Yeah. You could crawl around in a golf course. I'm like, I'll let that slide. As soon as they can fly, fuck you. You can't just land in my yard, you piece of shit. And then what?

You can fly away and I can't fly? Fuck you. Is there anything that flies right now that attacks people? See, that's the thing about eagles. Eagles got smart. They never got big enough to fuck with us. So we said, alright, we'll let you be our national bird. Eagles got really close to fuck with us. So we said, all right, we'll let you be our national bird. Eagles got really close. They got scary.

I mean, if you see an eagle and you see those talons and shit, they'll freak you out. I get attacked by birds a lot recently. I think I just must be near nests. Yeah, don't be doing that. I just sat in my backyard and a bird flew by. What do you got here, Jamie? This is just Wildlife of China on Wikipedia. These are different mammals does it say

predators of humans did you google predators of humans they have giant tigers oh they do that's it old people getting eaten by tigers

there you go soylent what if we find out it's a soylent South China tiger soylent Chinese people are soylent

we just figured it out oh my god and they're like we told you. It was in the fucking wrapper, you dumb piece of shit. Made in China. Oh, my God. They have Siberian tigers?

Oh, they have a bunch of other cats, too. What is that? Population of Bengal tigers. What are those other cats at the top? Leopards. Oh, leopards are terrifying. So this is what I think. Since they have a bunch of shit that we don't have that can kill you,

my estimation is that poor communication, lack of resources, very rural neighborhoods connected to tigers and cats are causing the extra $200,000 that would account for them having the exact same amount of old people go missing as we do. You said 25% of those old people have dementia. Oh, there you go. You wander off, you get eaten by a tiger. I forget.

What am I not supposed to get eaten by? A tree? No. Did you see that video of the Chinese person eating the other on the subway? Like cannibalism? What? Yeah. What?

Maybe, yeah, let's say Asian. Maybe it's not. Let's not show it for sure. Well, you can't really see anything. You just see a guy hunched over another guy. And he's eating a guy? Just blood coming out of him. So he attacks the guy?

Yeah. Is that real? It's happened a few times. It's happened, like, there's more than one. Is this real? Yeah, there's more than one video. So who's he attacking? He's attacking some other guy on the...

Oh, my God. Is that all blood? Yes. What did he attack him with? With his mouth. He's eating him. Oh, my God. This is insane.

There's more than one of these videos. How come no one's helping this guy? I don't know. I'm not getting in that. And there's more than one of these videos, Joe. Wait a minute. You would let that go on? I don't know if I'd let it get on, but I mean, like...

Oh, my God. I don't know. I mean, you have some skills that could help. How many people are in there? I can't do shit. I would faint. Oh, I'd kill the fuck out of that guy if I could. You'd have to worry that he's going to go after you next,

or your kid, or your friend, or your mom. He's got hepatitis and he bites you. You're fucked too. And that's a subway in China, by the way. And there's more than one of these cannibalism videos. Like, there's a China on subways. There's this, I don't know what happens, but there's a lot of this happening.

There's a bunch of videos of people randomly attacking people on subways. That was real weird what we were just watching. watching well here's the thing when there's something about being contained in a subway where you're in this thing or you know like it's a container and you know nobody can get away there's some weird instinct that people have where like if someone was like a predator already i bet they would be in that thing and it would like excite their predator desires you know if somebody just was some crazy person they wanted to go on a subway and just beat the shit out of somebody Like if they're in the we all know there's people like that in the world, right?

They just want to go and hurt somebody for whatever reason that's the place to do it right trapped You want to eat somebody the subways the move and I think a lot of schizophrenics and people on like PCP, it freaks them out more and more. And they're like, they can't just like, they get, they feel like they're in a confined space. So they freak out, you know, like they attack. Or I guess that cop that shot or the, remember the guy that recently got shot? I guess that guy had PCP in his system. So says. So says.

So says who? Alex Jones. Did you see Alex Jones? Let's go stay on one subject at a time fucking OCD ADD fuck This guy had PCP in his system. Yeah, the one the girl cop that shot magic they faked that He didn't have any PCP new system, right? Like who's checking that shit? Where did that happen? Wasn't that, like, North Carolina or some shit? Texas? Yeah. Where was that?

Huh? Tulsa, Oklahoma? Yeah. Yeah, they faked that. That's PCP in Oklahoma? They rigged that. I mean, maybe. Maybe he did.

Maybe that makes sense. Like, even if he wasn't threatening, maybe that makes sense why he wasn't listening, why he walked back to his car and reached into his door. Like, maybe he was fucked up on PCP. It totally makes sense. She still shot him. Yeah, well, she shot him, apparently, what I've understood, by people that are around law enforcement and tactical situations.

When people don't have trigger discipline and they haven't been in a firefight before any kind of situation where your adrenaline is jacked and you're really scared for your life and she might have been in some before which maybe even could exacerbate that and jack it up but her adrenaline was jacked she was shit in her pants. This dude wasn't listening. And then they tased the guy. And my friend Justin said to me, what most likely happened is when they tased the guy, she freaked out and pulled the trigger. Absolutely. Because it's loud. It's a loud popping noise when you tase somebody.

I think what he's saying is that she didn't even mean to shoot this guy. And that what happened with her was she just didn't have good trigger discipline and she freaked out because you know man if you've never been in a life-or-death situation with a giant dude who might be on PCP or might be on something he's not listening PCP scary I mean there's many videos you can watch guy on PCP and McDonald's you know battling cops and stuff like that and he gets tased a million times and nothing happens. Yeah, dude. You gotta be careful. PCP people, they feel pain different.

This cop in Texas the other day just tased somebody on a highway and almost got hit by a truck. They were chasing this guy and this guy starts running through this highway. So the cop tasers him. The guy falls and just misses a truck by an inch.

Why would you tase somebody while running on the highway while cars are stopped? Because you don't give a fuck. Stop running, bitch. But it depends on what the dude did. What if the dude was raping kids? True. Perfect tase, right?

It's all legit. It depends on, like if the guy was growing weed, that's ridiculous. Right. We need to find out what his crime was. But there's also a helicopter on you, so maybe let the guy cross the road and we'll get you on the other side what if we don't get him what if we don't get him and he's out there fucking kids you know what if it's like spider-man if you don't get him this is craziness i mean uh peter parker remember he let his dad go

or he let uh his uncle he let the guy pass his uncle, and the guy wound up. Let me see how they do this. Bam. Oh, shit. And then he has to go on there and stop cars. Oh, shit. Oh, my God. He tased him in the middle of the lane. I know. On the highway.

And if you go back 30 seconds when he first jumps on the highway, he almost gets hit like three times. It's ridiculous. Did you know? Oh, it does. Did you know that you could tase someone for that far away look how far he does this for oh it's the ones that shoot out those three claws yeah that's pretty good that's an accurate hit damn that's under pressure that's good trigger discipline yeah good control accuracy is in check i found a taser in my car recently and it's scary to turn on see here's

the thing man even if that dude was on pcp she shouldn't have shot him right it doesn't make it any different it just sort of explains his weird behavior she made a mistake but it's a it's a mistake that cost somebody their life but it's also like the whole thing is kind of fucked up man having a girl in that kind of a situation i don't know what kind of training she had or how long she had been on the job do you know five five years let's make some shit up five decades i'm gonna say five she was 52 and 50 of those years were on the force i just think it's fucking

terribly hard to do. And we don't get mad if somebody fucks up your fries. You know, if you go to McDonald's and you got burnt fries, like, these guys fucked the fries up. This is the equivalent in her job of fucking up the fries. Somebody dies. She made a mistake. She screwed

up. Somebody got shot and killed. Like that it's so much different than any other job it's so crazy i i i believe that it probably is exactly the sound of the taser and her being a high stress that makes complete sense to me i mean i think you're you just react by hearing the sound and my buddy justin would definitely know because he's he's down with all those uh tactical guys and military guys and he's a he would definitely know because he's he's down with all those uh tactical guys and military guys and he's a he's a gun nut he's constantly around those dudes so that's what they're saying that's most likely what happened it's probably what she relayed in private

or what they figured out or who knows but and fuck fuck that job imagine just chasing after people that are committing crimes all day holy shit how stressful would that be man she was a five-year veteran yes correct boom mic drop yeah it's just it's just weird man it's just weird that we need them and it's weird that they become what they are you know they become this death dealer or lifesaver, you know? Someone's coming after you and the cops break in, they're the lifesaver. Like, what a crazy position for someone to take, you know? Fucking stressful.

I would never do that. Fuck that. Especially nowadays. It's even worse. I mean, it probably was cooler back then because you got away with so much you know did you see the seven five seven five the documentary the seven five no holy shit okay and uh we had uh mike dowd from the um from the movie come in and explain to us like what it was like back then.

He's a great guy. By the way, he's been on Joey's podcast, too. How do you spell his name? DOWD. That's the way it sounds. He's awesome. Yeah, I didn't want to fuck it up. But I think it's just TheRealMikeDoubt on Twitter.

What is he on Twitter? Great guy. But holy shit, was he a criminal? Really? Oh, my God. They were the cops at the 75th Precinct. He found out from, like, it's an amazing documentary. And he found out from, like, the very first week on the job, like, in that range, that the cops were all corrupt.

And that you never turned on one of your own. And, you know, you just fucking, they had rules that they would skirt around. that the cops were all corrupt and that you never turned on one of your own. And, you know, you just fucking they had rules that they would skirt around. And he got deeply, deeper and deeper ingrained in this world of crime while you're a police officer. Drug dealing while you're a police officer. Intimidation while you're a police. Protection while you're a police officer. And he's driving a Corvette and living like a baller and they're going on trips they're driving a boat and then a bunch of crazy shit happens and one guy rats

the other guy out it's madness fucking great dude it's a great documentary and also he's like super honest about the whole thing he's super honest about everything because he went to jail did his his time, and then got out. And then they made the documentary because it's all about like it's like the 1980s. It's fucking amazing, dude. It's a great documentary. Nick DiPaolo told me about it. That's cool.

You still get it. I mean, it's on like I think it's on iTunes. I think it's on everything. It's fucking good, dude. Did you look at the video yet of the pigeons in the bread factory in Russia? No. No, I haven't looked at that. It's disturbing.

There's this mill filled with grain, and these pigeons are eating from the top of it, and they're so stupid that they just get sucked into the grain and chopped up into the bread. So if you've had bread in Russia lately. A lot of it is pigeons. A lot of it is pigeons. Holy shit. Boom, boom, two down. Oh my god, three down. Oh Jesus Christ.

One of them falls and lands in it and just gets sucked in. This is insane. This is fucking insane. It's one of the most disturbing. Jamie, immediately make me a video of this and send it to my phone so I can Instagram this

the world needs to know more yeah it's uh fuck that's harsh it's very gross and scary and sad it's just a harsh life how dumb are pigeons well look how little their heads are imagine if your head was that little.

Yeah, I guess so, but... Yeah, I guess so. I mean, Zika babies grow up to be pretty smart. Nope, we haven't had any. That's true. Actually, hasn't Zika babies... Grown up. Oh, really?

I don't think so. I mean, not that I've ever heard of. I just made that up. I think there's actually adult Zika babies. there I think so because I was thinking about making Zika hats for Zika people so it makes it look like their heads are bigger But I read recently that the Zeke has been around for a long time yes Like and then I just looked it up now. It says like since 1940s is when it was first discovered hmm yes there's actually Zika adults and they look like Zika babies by growing up yeah Google that Google Zika adults hmm there's some

pictures of like really really old pictures of people with weird deformities that you think of like carnival pictures and shit like that I wonder how many of those were that kind of a thing so like really like yeah i don't want to say like beetlejuice or no that's i don't know yeah maybe yeah who knows is some i mean little errors in the scripts that make a person now what are those errors what is this oh my god Zika virus. Microcephalus suffers. Cephalopathy. He seems normal.

Microcephalopathy suffers campaign. Wow. How many people, though? Oh, that's crazy. How many people are Zika, but they just have hats and you never know they're Zika? See, is that a thing? Hold on. Go back to the other picture.

That's crazy. There's a fucking bug that makes your head smaller. Just stop and think about how insane that is. We need to eradicate that bug. There's a bug that makes your baby's head smaller. Okay, I don't give a fuck what is going on in Russia. We need to kill all these goddamn bugs. Stop worrying about stupid shit.

There's people that are going to be born with little tiny heads. Well, they're also killing bees in a lot of cities. They're spraying for these Zika mosquitoes and they're bees. Yeah. It's all fucked up, dude. It's all fucked up.

From top to bottom. It's fucked up. Birth defects. Ooh. Scary. Terrifying. It's just terrifying to think that there's bugs

that can just all this. I mean, when you hear things like the Spanish plague, that like one flu or the Spanish flu, one flu in like the 1800s. Yeah. Or was it 1800s or 1900s? What was the Spanish flu? I want to say the 1800s. 1890s.

You know, I know this is my grasp of history. Ready? Yeah. Because in Interview with a Vampire, the dude that plays Brad Pitt had the Spanish flu. And he was a soldier and he was dying in 1918.

There you go. Yeah. He was so old-timey, basically, folks. Yeah, the dude who played Brad Pitt's character, or Brad Pitt's character, dude Brad Pitt played. It's hard to say. He died with that flu, and the stat gave him the vampire gene. Got real issues after that, bro.

Didn't really like being a vampire. Didn't really like choking on people's blood. Drank his own daughter's blood. It was kind of dark. We were talking about Westworld earlier. It reminded me of something, a thought I had on here. A couple people mentioned some things about, I think, dimensions, maybe. I might have had to

do a string theory, but I had to go with the story. I think I showed you this story before. This came out earlier this year about some scientists have found out that the human brain, the size of it, at least of what it can store, might be way more than they've thought previously, based on the way the brain

codes what it's calling bits. They need to stop the study right now and examine Red Band. My only point on this is that there was like 26, up to 26 neural pathways they discovered in the brain which allows for more maybe thought storage than they knew about. But when the person came on to mention dimensions in the past, a couple months ago, I'd never heard that there was up to 26 dimensions possibly.

I'd always heard it was 11. Yeah, and that's just the first time I heard 26, which made me go back to like something I had just heard about what had 26 to do with it in the brain, and it was this. Okay, so it says, according to superstring theory, there are at least 10 dimensions in the universe. M theory actually suggests there are 11 dimensions to space-time, and then bosonic string theory suggests 26 dimensions. What is bosonic string theory? I had never heard that term either, but I was just kind of asking in a strange way.

Like, do you think that those could be related in any way? Dude, when you see that stuff they're writing down, those yellow legal paths, and those string theorists are going off and they're doing computations, like, you just got to take their word for it. Like, you can't even try to rationally understand how the fuck some dude is looking at a notebook

and figuring out how many dimensions there are potentially in the universe. What? Well, Sonic is the original version of string theory. Now they're on super string theory or super symmetric string theory. You know, there's a pushback about this stuff from people, and I don't know if the people that push back are smart enough to actually be hanging in there with these dudes and their ideas. I don't know if the people that push back are smart enough to actually be hanging in there with these dudes and their ideas. I don't know who's right.

It's too, it's way, way, way over my head. I see them talking about this stuff. I don't, I don't have a fucking clue. The stuff that fascinates me, I mean, that fascinates me for sure. But it's so, what's the word, ethereal? It's so, it's so misty. It doesn't seem like you can grab it. But quantum physics like the guys are actually studying things like the guys who are looking at subatomic things

that fascinates me like where they can actually like they um like things being in a state of movement and then being still you know they've they've discovered that in subatomic particles. It's called a super state. They're moving and still at the same time. Like, what? What does that mean? They don't know, but they're observing it. They're observing particles blink in and out of existence. And so I'm sure they have some mathematical computations that go along with that,

but the bottom line is they're actually observing this stuff. This isn't something that, you know, they're writing down on notebooks and you can't get it. And, you know, I don't know that language. I don't know what the fuck they're getting at. These are people observing subatomic particles blinking in and out of existence. They don't know where they're going. This is real.

This is where scientists are going, holy shit, the smallest visible matter in Earth, in the world, in the universe, the smallest measurable matter, subatomic particles, it's magic. So when you get to the very bottom, you get to the smallest thing that we can currently observe, you're looking at things that perform magic. They go in and out of existence. They're there and they're gone.

They're still and they're moving. They're like a god. They're like a crazy magician. They're like a psychedelic trip. At the smallest measurable amount of reality reality the universe behaves like a magic trick that's fucking amazing it's mostly nothing like an atom is mostly nothing it's probably still there it probably does a trick to the eye of not being able to see it you know maybe could be but i don't think if they're using an eye to measure it. They're using some pretty sophisticated equipment.

They're pretty sure that this thing somehow or another disappears and reappears. And they don't know how. And you might be right. They might be able to come up with better and better equipment in 10 years from now. They go, oh, that's not what we were seeing. We were seeing this. It's totally possible. But they're all saying

it right now. And if they're right, I mean This is not like a debated thing like the fact that subatomic particles blink in and out of existence I think all those super smart dudes accept that shit That's magic dude. They're going away and coming back like where the fuck are they going? What's happening in there? How's that thing moving and still well it just is what you mean? What are you looking at? thing moving and still? Well, it just is. What? I mean, what are you looking at?

It's a new discovery by the Large Hadron Collider. Oh, Jesus Christ! Or, I don't know, official discovery, but it's a new theory. Large Hadron Collider set to discover fifth dimension and doorway to other universes. Jesus Christ! This is not

good! This is a movie! They're gonna open that fucking doorway and those greys are going to be waiting on the other side. You're going to take your eggs. Do you have any eggs? If you have eggs, they're going to take you. In the middle

of the night. Speaking of eggs, did you hear that there's one of those places that gets like sperm and eggs? Yeah, they made a person with three people's DNA. No. What? You didn't hear about that?

What's that? They combined the DNA of three people and through in vitro fertilization made a baby. And the baby was born. So there's a baby born with the DNA of three people. Wow. Not two people, but three people how did they mix it like gargling they just i don't know they just did we just put it on this in the bitch's mouth and told her to gargle and spit it in his cup don't use that word bitch in this show

just so rude rich hey um where did that take place that baby baby? Was that born in, like, Russia? It's boring. When I came up on, I just Googled it. There's an actual FAQ on WebMD about it. Oh, really? What are they saying? Baby's definitely gay or no? I don't know. I found another article. It's going to be a gay gladiator.

It's going to be the most handsome. It's about the technique is safe. Whoa. Three-person babies, IVF technique safe. Okay, if you say so, dude. That's awesome. I got to take your word for it. I don't know what that means that it's safe we don't know I mean how many people have been born

do we have a real good study group said 500 eggs from 64 donor women found that the new procedure did not adversely affect embryo development that's what you say now when that baby grows up to read your fucking mind you got a problem imagine if they put chips in these kids when they were little, like kill chips.

We're just like, we don't know how this is going to work out. Just in case this dude goes on a murderous rampage, we want to be able to have a button that we can press that just shuts him off. Because if you have a designer baby, your baby could be like a super athlete, super genius. But we don't know long-term consequences. So if you agree to this, we'll put the chip in your baby, and we'll give you a kill switch. So if your baby goes on a rampage, if it all goes wrong, we'll give a kill switch. But the parents of the babies, the super babies, are going to be pissed. How come these fucking regular babies don't have a kill switch?

You think about all the goddamn murderers that have ever existed all throughout time. None of them were super babies. So you're blaming my kids. You're blaming my super kids for all the shit you regular kids do. You want my kid to have a fucking chip that you can kill him? Everybody's got to have a chip we can kill him. So we all sign an agreement because we want to keep the people safe from the super babies. So everybody signs an agreement that everybody has a chip in the back of their head.

And we all wear chips. Regular babies, super babies, and everybody just say so polite because you're terrified. You're terrified that the government is going to come along and kill switch your chip that's the that's the key to a healthy happy society everyone's terrified of getting your kill switch hit that's the future that's we have to look forward to hackers you're close to the how remember that movie gattaca with uh ethan hawk and oh they have a kill switch it wasn't kill switch but when you're born you're either valid or not invalid I think is what it was that's true in real life like the highest society and invalids do

all the rest of the shit work whoa he like tricks himself to become a valid someone that's how the movies all about he tricks his code yeah yeah he gets a fake fingerprint for fake eyes and all the shit and all this the sensors. This is the early 90s or late 90s I feel like for if somebody creates a synthetic person you're telling me this synthetic person's not gonna have a kill switch Like you don't know if you don't know what that guy's capable of like if someone says well There is one option like what if they try to pass it through Congress Congress like fuck you and then someone says okay There's a solution What if every synthetic kid is it through Congress? Congress is like, fuck you. And then someone says, okay, there's a solution. What if every synthetic kid is born with a kill switch?

And then they go, okay, well, it's reasonable. It's reasonable. And then everybody, by 2070, we're all born with a kill switch. There's no more crime. Every now and then someone freaks out and they just zap, drop them, chop them up, feed it to the garden. I'm remembering that other movie, that Justin Timberlake movie where he's got time in time

and everyone's 25 and then they all die. You watch too many movies, motherfucker. Justin Timberlake movie. It's a future movie. Timberlake was in a few movies. Timberlake did a bunch of movies. He was actually a good actor. Alpha Dog, something else. He was in something else movies. He was actually a good actor. Alpha Dog, something else.

He was in something else, too. He's a good actor. I like Timberlake. The movie In Time, it was a really cool concept. Once you're 25, you stop aging, and then your, whatever, a year of life starts going. But that's all the currency, too. You work for time. You can trade time.

You spend time. And then once your time's time, you spend time. Mm. And then once your time's up, you're done. But people have thousands and centuries of years built up on their little clock. Right,

so like a sultan of Brunei or some super rich dude could live forever. Huh. Listen, man, all this we're talking about when it comes to the future, about what could happen, like these silly science fiction movies, they probably pale in comparison to how crazy it's actually going to be.

Playing VR, you got to play Duncan's VR. How awesome was that? Scary. Was it scary awesome? Scary awesome and awesome in a way where you go, well, it's not like right now. I knew I had goggles on. I knew I was playing a video game where you're on a castle and these little cartoons are bouncing. You shoot bows and arrows at them.

Have you played that one yet? I haven't played it, but I know what you're talking about. It's really fun. Yeah. So part of you is like, whoa, this is so cool. But there's another part of you that goes, you know where this is going, right? Where this is going and this is not that far of a time. You got to think, when we were watching that phonograph, when's that phonograph from, Jamie?

The late 1800s. Yeah. 1880s. So let's give it 1880. Let's say 1880. Think about 1880 to 2016. That's not very fucking long. So we've gone from a phonograph to a fake world in

What couple hundred years? Yeah, what a thousand years? Exactly. We're in it right now That's why this this election is happening. Yeah, that's why this thing is so ridiculous. Yeah, it could be that it's happening right now the PlayStation just released their virtual reality today or last night. And so now that's going to be for the first time. It's a price point that's going to hit the masses. So you're going to see a lot more people are going to have it. So this was a huge day yesterday.

And there's one of the games that comes with it, I believe, is where you're underwater. And it's not of the games that comes with it, I believe, is where you're underwater. And it's not really a game. You're just hanging out and a shark comes close to you and you get like attacked by a shark. But I guess it's so scary that like you're like. And that's just the Atari 2600 of VR. You know, what is going to happen? It's going to be insane.

If it hasn't already. I mean, we both remember Pong. Oh, yeah. I have my Pong. It's amazing. Yeah. Right? But when it first came out, you were amazed.

You can actually interact with something that's on the TV. Yeah. It was insane. That was so good. It was so crazy. It wasn't that big. You're like, look how little it is. We were playing and you stick a cartridge in there.

Cloot-toot. Cloot-toot. Cloot-toot. Cloot-toot. Cloot-toot. Cloot-toot. It was awesome. And compare that to this new doom you know i mean what what we're seeing now in just a short amount of time is insane i mean we've got a giant jump of progress in 200 years so what the fuck is it going to be in less than 200 years, right?

Did you say 1880s? I mean, that's, what? Did you see what BMW has announced? I don't know if they just did it yesterday or this week, but it's along this VR stuff. Oh, I did see this. The motorcycle? Yeah.

Dude, that's insane. It says you won't get in a wreck and you won't need a helmet. What? It balances itself, dude. I don't know about won't get in a wreck, but you basically can't is what they're trying to say. Is it electric? How can it not wreck?

Explain that. It doesn't make any sense. Something can still wreck into you probably. But you can't fall over in it? That's what it's saying? Yeah, that's what it's saying kind of. But you can fall off it. Yeah.

Yeah, maybe. That sounds fun. Yeah. You're going to fall off it because the force that it's gonna need to require to correct you. Look at that. Oh my god. That's what it looks like? Yeah, I was trying to find the helmet. Tron. It is a Tron. Go to the thing.

Show us a video, bitch. These are all from, these aren't real. Oh my god. Wait, where are you going? Stay there. Open that up. Oh my god. That's real? That's Tron. I don't know that it's out yet, but I don't know if it's outside of concept. Why does she have visors? The visor gives information, including speed and cornering hints to help rider.

It's got a rear view. It's a screen. It's AR, which is what a lot of companies are making a bet on VR or AR, augmented reality. Right, yeah. So this is an AR visor. Your rear view mirror is going to be in that. Your speed disk is an AR visor that's gonna it's your rearview mirror is gonna be in that your speed is gonna be in that updated info on cars probably ahead of you are gonna be in especially if it's dark dude that's the Batman thing right in the upper right hand corner the Dark Knight

Batman thing how close is that pretty close I would sue like bitch that's my even shrine god damn that link it's so it's basically they looks it looks like the wheels are a little bit wider than a typical motorcycle Is there a different profile view we could see how wide the tires are? Okay, no not much wider like a little bit though, right a little bit wider than a regular motorcycle They have a car that goes along with this I think is what I was hearing but the car the car they show seems like it's completely computer generated. Dude, we're living in the fucking future. Is this real?

I need to start eating healthy so I can have this someday. Dude, look at this. This is insane. This girl is on this thing and she's flying around in this space age motorcycle. Oh, my God. And looking at the view through these goggles that are showing where everything is oh my god this is amazing dude we live in awesome times and that's the navigation system is that what she's looking at in her goggles yeah yeah here like that's what it's

gonna oh man this is amazing it illuminates the road in front of you? Is that what that was supposed to show? What was that? It's tripping. The acid kicked in. What is this called, Jamie? I don't know. What is the video? Next.

Vision Next. I don't know. It's just BMW. The future of motorcycling. The BMW Motorrad. What does it say? I'm not on YouTube for this video. This is from the Daily Mail website.

Motorrad Vision Next 100. that's sexy it's pretty dope but you know it's still like someone could still run a red light you can't say that you're not going to get t-boned here's what the car looks like they got a car that does the same thing check this out because the way this, you're going to say this is super fake. Whoa. The way the shell moves and stuff is so strange looking. Oh, my God. This is crazy.

You sit inside of it. You press a button, and a steering wheel pops out of the dashboard. Oh! What? Is this real? No, no. This is real tires. Yeah, this is pretty CGIgi but this is like a

cgi this is what they're saying they are making and whether or not they're gonna actually get there oh my god this is dope so it shows you where debris is on the road ahead and like highlights it look there's a it says there's a biker right there yeah i see it biker how does it see that though it saw it before. I don't know. It's using different kinds of technology, probably like radar and pulses and stuff. It's using Big Brother, bro. They're going to know where you live, bro. What about the handle?

I want an actual steering wheel, bitch. Don't give me this stupid joystick. You're not going to need to drive it because it's going to be self-driving. Is it really self-driving 100% here? God, do you trust that? I do not trust that no some people don't even change their oil you know you think you think they're gonna have this thing maintained properly right I mean how many people are out there you get stuck in a lot of traffic and someone in front of you is just below and pollution out of the back of in front of you is just blowing pollution

out of the back of their pipe and you cough in and they just have a fucked up exhaust system or something. Did you see the self-driving car that ran over its own, like,

one of its own engineers? Like, he was trying to make a, trying to show, like, how the car detects people walking. Oh, no.

And it will slam on the brakes. And so, I think it's Volkswagen or something, and the guy just like goes now watch The car will stop and it just runs him over. Oh No, really yeah, oh poor bastard. Yeah, I don't think he got hurt too bad like but uh it didn't stop Well, they'll probably get it down eventually, but you want to be like super sure there it is

No, please don't tell me that this is going to happen. Watch. Oh, no. Oh, no. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. And they did that for a demonstration. The guy had a suit on, his hands in his pocket.

That was the engine, yeah. How about just put a cardboard cutout? Right. Okay. What are we playing, games here, folks? A real doll. Yeah, exactly. You don't need to do that. What about the crash test dummies? Those guys just disappeared. Exactly. Right Okay What are we playing Games here folks A real doll Yeah exactly You don't need to do that

What about the crash test dummies Those guys just disappeared Exactly Why don't they have Crash test dummies That just stand there Fucking idiots Don't stand there yourself

Don't you have a life Get hit by a car bro That guy's probably broken Probably every part Of his body's broken Yeah I mean If you're not

If you don't think That you're gonna get Bumped by that car like that You could easily Have a broken hip, broken legs. Fuck that, dude. I'm very passionate about this. We're losing our autonomous nature.

We're going to eventually be controlled by everything that we have in our life. You're not going to have any freedom to move around. You're going to be controlled by everything that we have in our life. You're not going to have any freedom, any freedom to move around. You're going to get in your car. It's going to take you on a path to work. You're going to punch in the data. You'll be allowed to have your own car, but nobody could drive anymore. Well, once we stopped letting people drive their own car, I mean, it was just, first of all, road rage death stopped. That's one thing.

And it was worth it alone to lose that freedom. You know why you road rage, that freedom. You know why you road rage, right? Do you know why you road rage? You road rage because you're scared. When you get in a car and you're going fast, your senses are heightened. You know your senses are heightened. Everything is dangerous. You don't feel it because you feel like, oh, I'm just chilling, going on the road. But you're super aware that you're going fast. You're super aware there's people around you. They're all throwing these metal boxes.

You've got to trust these idiots to stay in your lane. You're already on level eight. So when someone gets in front of you, even if it's like nothing, that's why people don't get road rage when they're walking. Like if you're walking in the mall and it's kind of a lot of people and someone gets in front of you, you don't give a fuck. You don't give a fuck at all. Do you ever give a fuck if somebody walks past you and gets in front of you at the mall? They're just. You don't give a fuck at all. Do you ever give a fuck if somebody walks past you

and gets in front of you at the mall and they're just walking down the hallway? No one gives a shit, right? But there's something about being in the car that your senses are super heightened up because you're worried about the consequences if someone crashed into you. So you're like, what the fuck, dude?

Fuck you! Fuck you! And that's where all that shit comes from. And then you pull over, bitch. Pull over, bitch. I got a gun. That's where all that shit comes from. And then you pull over, bitch. Pull over, bitch. I got a gun. That's where all that shit comes from. You think your life's on the line

when it's really a minor fender bender or a minor traffic infraction or a minor rudeness where someone cut you off where they didn't have to. Maybe they could have waited a little bit and got behind you. That makes sense.

That just happened to me when I left the other night after the Fight Companion. It was like 2 o'clock in the morning. I was almost home in Hollywood. Some cars were in front of a bar. Some cars were blocking the two lanes of roads, so everyone was merging over.

I merged over. The guy behind me apparently thought I cut him off, so he started getting up on my ass. I could tell the guy behind me is pissed. I was getting that vibe. So I started slowing down to just let him go past me, let him if he's in a hurry go for it he just pulls up next to me and stops and starts like fucking cussing me out middle finger all this and that i just thumbs up man like i don't i'm not in a hurry i don't know where you're going i don't

know why you're mad but i started thinking like oh shit he's gonna follow me around the corner and it's gonna have to get serious but he just went away some people are just nuts and some people are angry at everything. They're angry at their wife. They're angry at their job. They're angry at their friend. They're angry at their fucking neighborhood softball league that won't let them pitch. People are nuts.

You run into someone. That's why getting in those kind of exchanges like over nothing over cars getting in front of you i used to date this chick she was hilarious she was very smart like super smart but she also would do occasionally she would do dumb reckless shit and one thing she would do if someone cut her off she'd be like fuck you and she would get in front of the car and cut them off it was totally contrary to her regular personality. Her regular personality was like super fun loving and she was real, always smiling.

But there was something in her head about like someone cutting her off. She was like, fuck that. And she would get in front of them and you know, she cut this dude off and she had a convertible too. A little white convertible BMW. I was like, what are you doing?

Like, what are you doing? Like you can't, you can't just go around doing that. Like, you've gotten lucky. If you do that, someone's going to do something terrible to you. Like, you know, this is a part of the news. Road rage murders. There was, at one point in time, L.A. had a streak of them where it became trendy.

And there was, people were just shooting each other on the freeway during traffic. Like that scene from L.A.'s story. They made fun of it where he just has a gun and they all have guns. That's what it was based on. trendy and there was people were just shooting each other on the freeway during traffic like that scene from la story they made fun of it where he just has a gun and they all have guns based on when i was a kid and i had heard and we would hear the news about road raid deaths they were always in california and there was people just shooting people like fucking crazy in california you just got to be careful you can't cut off the wrong person you can't like you can you could fuck up in those situations and you accidentally get killed like you accidentally people kill people in road rage incidents all the time and i bet the guy who kills the other guy probably

regrets it for the rest of his life 99.9% of the time. But you just run into the wrong person at the wrong time, and you stand your ground, they stand their ground, and next thing you know, there's violence. Unnecessary, stupid, senseless violence. There's too many gangsters in L.A., especially people that have way too much money and gang violence. And so you don't even know who you're fucking with, like a prince that is a billionaire

and he'll just like kill you and just be like, fuck it, I'll just go, you know. Go back to wherever. LA has most road rage related incidents in the US, study finds. Wow. Of course, I'm not surprised. What's the numbers though?

It's a strange study. An auto insurance center analyzed 65,000 posts on Instagram using hashtag road rage. That's ridiculous. This is kind of the laziest fucking reporting ever. Well, our detailed analysis of the situation by going to hashtag road rage. I wrote this article five minutes before I posted it, and fucking California is a lot.

You know what that means? People just bitch in California. Oh, my God. Fucking road rage. It does say there's more than 1500 people have been killed or injured in road rage incidents in the u.s over the last five years but what about california it doesn't say that it's got to be there's got to be like california road rage statistics for 2016 i mean we have police chases multiple times a day i mean i'm

watching them non-stop all day they're the greatest Don't you think that what's going on with us, though, is that it's just so overpopulated? There's a real frustration that people have, and that's also a part of the road rage. It's like, if you try to drive to Orange County at 4 o'clock in the afternoon, if you're leaving downtown LA and you're trying to make it down to, like, Redondo Beach,

good luck. How many hours is that going to take? At 4. If you leave at 4 30 oh you fucked up dude what time did you leave i left at 502 no how long did you take you to get home three hours i got three hours in the car that's normal that happens that can happen dude you want to go to newport beach you want to you want to live in newport beach but work in downtown la there's too many of us there was a i had to go to was it culver city wherever sony studios is and all that's at culver city i had to go there the other day at like two in the afternoon now on paper it's like seven miles from my house or something like that or it took me an hour and

20 minutes to get there the other day and it it's literally like 7 to 10 miles from my house. Yeah, you could almost walk there as quick. Yeah. Yeah, I mean, if you walked, how many miles an hour do you walk? Five? I think if I were on a bicycle, I could have got it half the time, I bet. Hmm. Yeah, for sure.

A bike, for sure. A bike, for sure. If you didn't get killed by someone with road rage, that's in a fucking fuck you with some other guy. Fuck you. Cutting each other off and you just get clipped. You go flying through the air. People are angry.

There's too many of us. But meanwhile, you get in a plane, you fly over the country like, look at all this space. Why are we all huddled up? Why are we fucking huddled up so much? Because the ocean. We need to figure out a way to get the fucking salt out of the ocean in big pipes, pump it to the middle where everything's dry, and let's fix this. We do have a lot of desalinization plants, if you look it up.

Yeah, it's super expensive and slow they're not that efficient it's a very difficult process it's very expensive it's not worth it you know and even not worth it with water as jesse ventura was saying on before water being more expensive than oil it's still not worth it take the salt out of the water that's that's how hard the process is it's kind of ironic right. We're right next to the water. We got a water problem. It's fucking hilarious. Really, if you stop and think about it. But when you're flying over and you look down at some of the big dry spots on the way to Vegas,

you're like, Jesus. Can't you boil the water out, right? No. Kind of? Go ahead, try it. No, no. What am I thinking? Not boil.

Well, you could boil spring water or pond water or lake water, and you kill most of the shit that's in there. There's some shit that can survive that, though. They have all these water filters that people take when they're, like, hardcore backpackers. You could shit in it and drink it. Well, I was talking about this recently. I got really into, like, these hardcore backpackers because I was listening to this one podcast where they were talking about the Appalachia Trail.

Have you ever heard of that? Appalachia Trail is a trail that goes from Georgia all the way to Maine. And they walk it. It takes five months. That's crazy. Yeah. And they wear the same clothes the entire time. They live off their backpack.

I mean, I was listening to these guys talk about it. I'm like, that is nuts, man. That is a nutty way to live like that's a crazy accomplishment i mean people think they're badass by doing a marathon dude around 26 miles took me four hours but i've perseverance now these people are walking to maine and it's one of those things once you start something like that like you're kind of committed to it you're kind of committed to this stupid thing that's going to take five months. My friend just did, not the whole thing, but he was just there for a part of it for five days, like last

weekend, I think. He was a Marine, but they just went and camped, and he just put up a Facebook message like, I'm in a hammock, but it's 37 degrees, it's raining, and we're fucked. The point was, they don't know where they're getting their water from. So a lot of them bring filters, and they have these things that they hang.

There's a bunch of different kinds of filters. Some of them actually are straws, and you can take it, and you actually dip into a pond and suck it through this straw, and you can drink it. And then they have other ones where there are gravity filters, and they have these, like, buckets and all this shit. It gets filtered out of the water, and then it comes down, and it comes out clear it's really interesting man because these people are using like the best

state-of-the-art survival technology like that kind of shit and uh just drinking out of ponds and stuff yeah yeah i saw the p1 where the like the ceo goes no watch this is urine and yeah makes it and drinks it yeah but, but you can drink piss. Piss doesn't even taste that bad. I know. It's nothing. I drank my own piss a bunch of times. There's a video of you drinking piss on the internet.

Yeah, of me and this dude, no name. Yeah. Because someone had told me that drinking your own piss was like really good. It had vitamins and minerals in it. Wasn't it? Stuff that came out of your body. Yeah. The fighter guy.

There's been a bunch of them, a bunch of people. Lyoto Mach minerals in it. Wasn't it? Stuff that came out of your body. Yeah. The fighter guy. There's been a bunch of them. A bunch of people. Lyoto Machida did it. He was kind of famous for drinking your own piss. And so I went, well, what the fuck is this about? And I drank it a couple of times. And I was thinking after I drank it, I can't believe I just drank my piss. Like, what the fuck is wrong with me?

Yeah. Yeah, me and that dude. So we both just whipped it out and peed in a cup and then we drank it all year. That's the dude, incidentally. That's no name. That's the dude who introduced me to

nootropics, believe it or not. How ironic and appropriate. We're about to do something really stupid. Salud. Click cups. That's because we're peed in here. We're about to do something really stupid. It smells like pee. It's because we peed in here.

We clicked it. I just downed it. But you know what, man? I've been working on Fear Factor for so long. And he couldn't do it, man. He was hurling. He throws out Yeah Old school

Old school I don't know what my point was about drinking piss oh it's not that big a deal it's all in your head it's like eating roaches same thing it's all in your head like there's a lot of bugs that we serve people on fear factor they didn't taste bad at all they barely tasted like anything like spiders a bunch of spiders we ate you know spiders are um they're cousins of crabs lobsters and shit. You know? They don't taste bad. Oysters is amazing that we eat oysters.

Just pulling them out of the ocean, you can just open them up and just suck down this slimy vagina. It is kind of like that. You know, they've... Do you know how lobsters switch from being like, I don't want to say poor people's food, but I thought that's what it was was how did it make the change like well um it all happened when lobsters used to be like a bar food they used to go to the east river in the turn of the century i think it

was like in the the 1800s the early 1900s and they would uh cast out for lobsters and catch them and feed them to people that were like hungry at bars. And it was thought to be like garbage food. Somewhere along the line, probably the supply dwindled because they overfished them. Who knows? I don't know. You know, I was reading this thing about diamonds the other day and how they managed to keep diamonds super valuable when they're not really rare anymore. It was fascinating that they recognized it coming and that diamond production up until the time they

discovered these mines in south africa i think it was diamond production was very small a few pounds a year and then all of a sudden they just hit the mother load they just found so many diamonds they realized oh my god diamonds are just weird like they're not valuable so they formed this giant group the debiers group and they said we'll just hoard all these fucking diamonds, control all the diamond mining. We decide that they're still valuable. So because they don't release them, but they keep mining them. And so they have way more diamonds than they sell. Like the amount of diamonds, the diamonds they sell.

And then diamonds are worth a fuckload of money. So they're rare, right? But they sell them all the time. But they sell them as if they're rare. But they couldn't be rare. If they were that rare, you wouldn't be selling so many of them. Like sell them as if they're rare, but they couldn't be rare. If they were that rare, you wouldn't be selling so many of them. Like, how many do you have?

They essentially have an unlimited supply of diamonds. But they're making it out like, diamonds are so rare. It's so rare that we found this diamond. Like, bitch, you got a lot of them. You got warehouses full of them. It's kind of like the sunglasses and glasses industry are all owned.

Like, all the known, like, Ray-Bans, Oakleys, they're all owned by one company. So, like, glasses shouldn't be that expensive or sunglasses shouldn't be that expensive. Well, there's a lot of sunglass companies, dude. And they are all owned by the same company. Are you sure? If you look it up, there's a company. Well, why don't you Google it?

How many different? There's got to be competitors. I watched the same thing you watched. It was on a TV show. The guy, like, did a whole big breakdown, big video of the whole thing. I'll look it up. And what's weird is that companies held out. Oakley was like, no,

we're not going to... I forget what happened. The store was like, we don't want to carry this brand because they're not a part of our company. Then they just ended up buying Oakley and then raising the price. Ray-Bans used to be cheap glasses, and then when they bought Ray-Ban, they pumped it up to like now you can't buy a Ray-Ban at like $200.

Really? Yeah. What did they used to be? They used to be just like the cheap glasses, you know, like a $10 glass or something like that. Turns out a single company controls several of the outlets where you buy eyeglasses. Okay, so they control the outlets, but do they own the companies? Yes, and they own the companies. So they also own lens crafters.

They also own Sunglass Hut or any of the sunglass stores. They own everything. That's pretty slick, right? Because how many people buy sunglasses from those sunglass huts? That's where a lot of people buy them, right? A statement to Snopes.com the company said its sales account for only 10% of the frames sold worldwide.

Snopes.com did however conclude that regardless of the actual figure, much of Adam's Ruins Everything's assessment of Luxottica's market dominance was accurate. Okay, that's that Adam Ruins Everything show. It's an interesting fucking show. I love that guy.

Yeah, it's an interesting show. It's some of the stuff that he gets on is really, really, it's a well-measured take that some people disagree with, but there was one

that Stephen Crowder just was mocking one, and he had some really good points. Car dealership is one of my favorite episodes. I had no idea about car dealerships. It was about illegal immigration. And he was talking about how the fence wouldn't help.

And the fence wouldn't help because only, I think, it was like a certain percentage of the people that got into the country came into the country by foot it was something like only like 60 60 percent came in by foot so the idea was like wait a minute how see if you could find it this is interesting statistics because it means a lot of people came in by foot like yeah fence would definitely stop that like it wouldn't stop everything but by the own the definition the own show explored it would stop a large number of people you see it but it probably just changed people video but I'm trying to find the numbers okay so that's 60% I don't know what the numbers are big oh if you go to louder with crowders website explains it in the the not just in the video but in in the actual description of the video.

It has the numbers. So, yeah, wouldn't that 60%, though, like if there was a wall, just fly? Well, I guess we have to fly now. It's not that easy to fly, though. It's super hard to fly. The idea is that it's really easy to walk across. That's the idea that a fence would help. But here's something even weirder.

Pete Dominick, you know, the Pete Dominick from the stand-up with Pete Dominick, I I think radio show on Sirius. I think that's what his show is called. Forgive me if I'm wrong. He he was saying that the actual amount of Mexicans that immigrate to the United States, like the net amount, you know, they go back and forth. Who goes here? Who's there? It's zero. It's like it's even like the same amount go over there as come over here yeah but how do they know that yeah and plus are all those people just killed like our people that go down there just murdered i don't think so depends on where they're going right what do you got there jamie he doesn't have anything i'm he just has a three paragraphs of like his opinion of what the video is talking about. Does it have anything with numbers? It has one,

no numbers at all. No. Okay. Well, he, he explains it in the, if you like play the beginning of the clip, it explains it in the clip.

It gets to it pretty quickly. It's kind of interesting. Why don't you just play it? It's kind of interesting because it gets to the, the weird numbers of it pretty quick. That could get us taken off without his permission. Can we play it so only Brian and I can hear it? Yeah.

Sorry, fuckers. I'll reenact what he says. Okay. What'd you do? Skip to the beginning. Go to the beginning, please. It's a 30-second intro to the beginning, please. Okay.

Okay, 40% came here on planes. Okay, you can kill it. That's all I wanted to hear. So that's 27 to 40% of the people came here on planes that means that between 60 and 73 percent came here walking like how would you say that a fence is not going to stop that or in a car yes which which even if we had a wall we mexicans are still allowed to come to united states to you know go on vacation aren't sure yeah and that's all they're going to do it's it's like they have one shot if especially if i don't know how it works like how you can get a visa or how you don't get a visa to visit some countries are harder some countries are harder but mexico to united states ain't that

hard but going to like philippines like trying to get a like i tried to remember when i tried to rescue a philippine woman but she was killed by that tsunami yeah like uh i trying to get a, I tried to remember when I tried to rescue a Philippine woman, but she was killed by that tsunami. Yeah. Like I tried to get her a visa and it was like, oh no, you have to wait in line. You have to like six months, you won't get approved. Like, yeah. Cause they know they're not coming back to the Philippines. That's a lot of people from a lot of parts of the world.

If you're in a really, really super poor part of the world and you get a shot at trying to just eke it out here in the United States, you're like, fuck it. I'll take a chance. Yeah. You can establish a life over here over long periods of time man yeah i guess you could just come over and visit pretty easy i mean there's a a road there they have to find a reason why you can't come over and visit so video i saw recently People climbing the fence. Whoa, they got backpacks on.

They look over at the camera. That guy got a cell phone near his ear? Because they have those backpacks? So they climbed back over again? It's that easy? necessarily true. Because they have those backpacks? So they climbed back over again? It's that easy? I'll skip ahead, but... Holy shit. Border Patrol. So Border Patrol sees them.

So they're hanging out for a minute. Wow, so they're in the United States right now. They got walkie-talkies, dude. Oh, they see that... No grab in. No grab in. Yeah, they're talking. And then they're covering their face.

Wow. Wow. It's so easy to climb that wall. Yeah, why is it so easy? There's a clock showing you how fast it takes to take 10 seconds to throw over. Holy shit. Those dudes are like, they're like little acrobats. To be able to have that kind of hand strength to pin down those things and climb it like that, that's pretty fucking impressive.

So they're just holding on to those things, right? Wow. That's interesting. Is that the newscaster catching them? Look at that. Pretty. God. Oh, she's very angry. They're on the wrong side of the dirt. Pretty. God. Oh, she's very angry.

They're on the wrong side of the dirt. Wow. Yeah, imagine if you're on the wrong side of the dirt and you're looking at all those nice people hanging around Corpus Christi, partying it up. You're down here dodging bullets, going fucking bullfights and shit.

It's fucking weird that we just decide that people are born in a wrong patch of dirt drives me crazy especially with mexicans i just love all my mexican friends and everything like that and the fact that like you know like trump just pisses me off when it comes to that he's a strange man this thing's very strange i just have the crazy feeling that this is like the last gasps of this silly system. It's going to take a few more election cycles before it completely implodes. Some disastrous occurrence has to take place before someone comes up with an alternative method that people embrace. There's got to be something.

Like, it's not, it's just not going to keep going like this. It can't. You know, this is why we're down to these two. Nobody wants that gig. It's going to be, how long. It can't. You know, this is why we're down to these two. Nobody wants that gig. It's going to be, how long until it's a computer program? It's probably not the worst idea. 20 years. Yeah.

You have a series that just is common sense. It looks up facts and figures and it tells you what the best answer is at that situation. Well, not only that, maybe instead of you just sitting down and making one impulsive choice as to who's going to be the leader of the free world maybe if you want to participate in choosing the next leader you have to interface with a system and it has to talk to you about your wants and your needs and desires and they try to find a solution that's mutually compatible with ethics and the desires of all the people that are attached to the system so they run the the desires of all the people that are attached to the system. So they run the desires of all the people that are attached to the system through some

sort of ethics program where they try to think about what's important and what's not important and where people are just being bitches and where people are being lazy and where people are being too controlling and just figure out a way that you can concoct a system of government where nobody's profiting from being in charge. And as soon as people say they won't do that, because there's just too many people that profit from being in charge in gigantic ways. So it's too valuable to be in charge. It's not something you get off on doing just because you did a great job. It's something you get off on doing because you used it in a personal way to enrich your own bank account.

You've figured out a way to use these weird laws that you set up to suck a bunch of money out of the system. That's what we're getting over and over and over again. That's the reason why they're doing it in the first place. Nobody else wants that gig. You have to be like a crazy

person with an amazing view of yourself or you just gotta grab him by the pussy grab him by the pussy imagine if he wins imagine if we have a president that talks about grabbing chicks by the pussy i'm just so sick of him i just can't funny though it's kind of if it's is a simulation, man, they're ending it good. It's coming down nice. I would have loved to see somebody. I'd rather have Kanye than Trump. Yeah, he's going to win next year.

It's going to be Jesse Ventura versus Kanye. They might team up together. If Kanye's smart, he'll make Jesse his running mate. Because Jesse likes to spend a lot of time in Mexico. Makes some sort of a joint agreement where President Kanye takes care of the heavy lifting. And then Vice President Ventura, he just wears his fanny pack and hangs around in Mexico. And in case he needs me, I just call him on the phone because he doesn't have a cell phone. We should try to get somebody elected, like one of our friends, like Joey Diaz or something, next round.

That's not going to work. But it's almost coming down to that. I mean, the reason why Kanye West really could be president is because it is kind of almost coming down to a popularity contest. So it's almost coming down to it. It doesn't necessarily have to be the person who can do the job best. It's the person who the people love the most, who they can convince themselves can do a good enough job.

Or who the person can convince them that they'll do a good enough job. It's not necessarily the best person for the job. A popular person, like if a guy like Kanye West and Kanye and Drake ran together for the children. They might win, man, if Kanye and Jay-Z ran. Okay? What if Nas runs for president? and jay-z it's a joint ticket hey man i might fucking vote for them i might do that too naz is a smart dude jay-z is a smart dude maybe they would come up with something that makes sense but then jay-z did

have that streaming music service and that wasn't a really good idea was it still does doesn't he still do that people buy that stuff? No. Did it not work? Didn't work? I think they're trying to figure out how to get it bought by somebody else. Probably, right? Yeah. I mean, he's just trying to make a buck. Got to take a chance.

But anyway, at the end of the day, there's a lot of fucking smart people that are super popular, is my point. If you can get really, really popular, like George Clooney. You tell me if George Clooney didn't run for president, he couldn't win? George Clooney can be the president of this fucking country without a doubt. Ronald Reagan. The perfect example. Even Alec Baldwin now, the door is open to Alec Baldwin.

Okay? Because after all that grab the pussy stuff, all that crazy shit that Alec Baldwin did, screaming at people, calling them faggots and shit, no one's gonna remember that anymore. The daughter stuff was terrible. Yeah, the daughter. That was terrible. But you know what? You could say he was drunk. He apologized.

They have a great relationship now. People forgive you. You don't have to be perfect. I think if we look for a person who's perfect to be president, we're not going to have a president because there are no perfect people. But everybody's been lying, so we have to readjust our curve. Our curve's all fucked up because we've been dealing with a bunch of politicians who have been pretending to be someone who are not. They've been lying about everything they do. They've been lying about who's paying them to do this and who they're supporting, where the money's coming from and why they do it.

And the unspoken arrangements that they have with certain people to pay them large sums of money. They don't even have to say, I want you to do this. It's understood that you're going to do things to support their interests because they've paid a shitload of money to help you out and to pay you to come do these fucking speeches of these ridiculous plate nobody wants us nobody wants to see a fucking bill clinton speech who's paying who's paying for that who's who's excited about that who's going to pay enough money to justify a 250 000 hillary clinton speech who's paying that who's paying that a crazy person you have to be like dude this is going to be the shit we have we have tickets to kiss we're going to see kiss they have a reunion tour i know it's not the real ace freely and it's not the real

peter chris but the fucking show is awesome dude it's amazing and then right after that to top it off hillary cl is going to speak. Now, that's not something, I mean, she can be a very effective politician. But to pay someone that much money to speak, like, you're just making it obvious. That's not what a normal, super famous person gets. They don't get $250,000 to speak at a luncheon. Some comedians. Not that much.

Close. But you can sell out Madison Square Garden. You know, there's a difference. Like, that's ticket sales. Like, if Bill Burr sells out Madison Square Garden, he's going to get a giant chunk of money. I don't know what that number is, but it's probably a giant chunk of money, right? I'm sure we could ask Dane Cook. Dane Cook sold out Madison Square Garden four times, okay? That's a giant chunk of money he must have made.

But he made it because people paid money to see him. Like, they wanted to see him entertain them. Are the bankers really doing that? Are they fucking psyched? They have lighters up while she's talking, like, fuck yeah, talk about deregulation! Woo! Fuck yeah, Hillary!

She's up there with a bite suit on, like a German shepherd's gonna jump out of the back of a paddy wagon and bite her legs and try to take her down. She's wearing that with a bite suit on like a German Shepherd's gonna jump out of the back of a paddy wagon and bite her legs And try to take her down. She's wearing that boxy bite suit Fuck out of here. It's the whole thing's ridiculous So it's so obvious These people are just They're just running this thing the way they've always been running this thing. We're just getting to see it now We're getting to see it like really super clear.

We are real weird, real weird to watch them scramble and readjust and change and shift and move. But if you want to be successful in the world that those people run in, you got to be one of those people. Like that's why Bernie Sanders is shunned. Because Bernie Sanders, whether you agree with his politics or you disagree with his politics, and I agree with a lot of things he says, he's an outsider. They don't want that guy. That guy's not going to play ball. That guy's going to

talk to people. He's going to be reasonable. He might be anti-capitalist to a certain extent to some people, but ultimately what he does represent is something that's different than the way things are running now. I'm not having that. Fuck that. But he got closer than anybody like him has ever gotten, ever. So I think if four more years of chaos, whoever the fuck gets in, you might want to go to Canada for a little bit. Just hang out. Just go to Vancouver. Yeah.

Who knows what the fuck's going to happen, man? I mean, people are up in arms. I've been watching exclusively Fox News. Because those are the people that think the least like me. So I've been exclusively watching. And occasionally I agree with them on many things. But those are the people that think the least like me. So I've been exclusively watching. And occasionally I agree with them on many things. But those are the people that I agree with the least. So it is fascinating watching them.

First of all, the Trump debate. I thought he's 0-2. I thought Hillary whooped him in the first one. And I thought she clearly outboxed him and outmoved him in the second one. He did land a devastating blow that you'd be in jail. Because you'd be in jail. That was devastating. That was like a total two-point round.

That was a 10-8 round for sure. He dropped her. She got rocked. Referee saved her. She was saved by the bell there. But other than that, I think she won. I think she's just better at that. She's got better economy of words, unlike me, rambling.

She says her sentences more concisely. She's more measured in her approach. She's more disciplined in her preparation. To say that she didn't win, it's not fair. It's not true. So I'm watching these people just lie. Well, obviously, Donald Trump was the winner of that debate. I think, oh, there can be no doubt.

There can be no doubt. Like, are you really serious? Is that what you guys are arguing? It blows my fucking mind, though. Like, how are you watching the same thing as me? Like, the person that was in the room with me agreed with me. You know, like, if you were in the room, would we be both sitting there like fighting? There's there's terms that he uses that you should only use very, very sparingly because they indicate that you're scrambling. And one of those is and I'm going to be honest with you and I'll be honest with you.

Yeah, this is a shame. I find this to be a shame like that to me says he's he's in the moment, he's in the moment, but he's free-balling a little bit. He's free-balling. She's not doing that. She's saying the America that we see in front of us is not perfect, but it is the best that we can find in the world today. And I'm proud to be an American. And she says this stuff with the right inflection and whether or not that's,

I know, this is a media thing, she's a fucking crook and she's still going to ruin this country. I understand that. But that's not what a debate is, okay? What a debate is, is some sort of a contest of words. It's a battle of words. It's a battle of ideas. It's a battle of concepts. It's a battle of words and personalities, importantly. he did everything wrong in that respect he's looming over her and it wasn't effective you know she she didn't take the bait she didn't engage she laughed and smiled when he said ridiculous shit even when he said you'd be in jail she walked off and just stood there as if nothing happened like she had she had a great reaction to him so it's it's not whether or not she'd be a better president but if you want to judge a debate like a game of tic-tac-toe or checkers or you know or or you're it's some sort of a thing that you're scoring you're scoring this thing i mean the people it's like a team you watch it on online 67 percent think mrs secretary of state clinton won the debate now the trump supporters feel differently and then you go to these people and they're like like, I felt he was strong. I felt like what he said in that one thing,

you go to jail, that really rang with me. That really made sense to me. And you see all these people that they've chosen that are kind of interesting or controversial or stupid, or that one guy with the crazy sweater, they had that poor bastard, some poor bastard with a giant red sweater. And he stood out there and he said his name. And so his name became like a meme. That sweater became a meme. That sweater sold out everywhere all over the world like instantly.

People are going to be that guy for Halloween now. Yeah. He's everywhere. Yeah. He's everywhere. He's selling shirts. Good for him. Good for him.

50,000 followers. But that's, see, it's a fucking, it's a game and it's an entertaining show. That's what these debates are. And it's a giant hustle. And this is, I'm not saying this in a conspiracy theory sort of a way, because I think we're hustling ourself. We want this hustle. This is a hustle we all want to see. We all want to pretend that he's going to fix it, or we all want to pretend that she's going to be amazing. We all want to pretend. It's a weird, weird show. It's a weird show. And we're watching these people improvise right in front of us. Alex Jones' response to it was very upsetting to me.

It was wonderful. Alex Jones, literally, literally, she's a demon from hell. Literally, we've seen flies land on her head. Ladies and gentlemen, we've seen flies. I've talked to people who are on the scene! He's fucking beet red. He's got a purple red face. There's demons! Demons are real. He was crying. Mm-hmm. It's wonderful. I love that guy. He's the best. I agree. But that was upsetting. I think he's taking it to the right place. I think he's just

gone full parody. Just go, just get so crazy. I think it's perfect. Yeah, it's perfect. Yeah, just give people just a little more than they can swallow. I'm choking. Like the irony and the crazy is making even like the serious conspiracy theories reconsider their position, which I think is good, which is also the best argument that he's psyops. That he's actually CIA, NSA undercover to discredit the entire truth or movement. Don't you understand? I went down two rabbit holes last night, two Tower 7 rabbit holes.

I went down the explanation Tower 7 rabbit hole, which I found to be very plausible. And then I went down the other rabbit hole which is actual scientists that are uh saying that 9-11 was absolutely a controlled demolition and it's really weird man because one of them the scientist guys he was given this lecture i forget the gentleman's name but he's a professor emeritus of some university which means uh he was a professor and then he retired but they allow him to keep his title and keep his office. And this dude's off his rocker. He does these two-hour speeches about Tower 7, about freefall speed and thermite and all these different chemicals that were found in the wreckage.

And he's just obsessed with this idea. And apparently he's not the only one. There's thousands of different, at least 1,000, I think it's like 1,500 or something, architects and engineers in that 9-11 truth thing that think that 9-11 either was an inside job or Tower 7 was a controlled demolition or both. There's a spectrum of belief systems that's involved in the 9-11 truth or movement. Some people think that there's a lot of nuts to think that planes didn't even really hit the towers that there were explosions and then there's other people that think that the

towers were rigged and that they rigged these things like years in advance and they remember seeing these maintenance people and they were so like these nefarious maintenance people are setting up thermite bombs all throughout the beams of the but then there's this other video that shows how how easily things weaken uh under fire shows a bunch of shit collapsing under fire including a bridge there was one where a bridge collapsed just because of a fire underneath the bridge the steel and the bridge heated up too much and just couldn't support the weight and apparently what is explaining is that people think that steel melts at a certain temperature which is very true but it significantly weakens way lower at a way lower temperature than

it melts so they were showing all these different um things that that collapse just fall down just just give up just like that tower seven did but it's fun to think that there's an evil genius that lives in a mountain that rigged all that shit. And now he's laughing in a pile of money. Because he got away with it 15 years ago. You know, they opened a Walmart in Burbank. Thank God. And I was excited. And I decided.

Why? I hate mom and pop businesses. Just because it's nice. I see people working for cheap. It's just nice. But you go there thinking it's in Burbank, one of the suburban nicer areas of Los Angeles. No way it's going to be the same people that go to Walmart in Burbank

than you see on the internet. Or no. Whatever it is, it's like flies on poop. It was just filled with tits hanging out. This woman just bruises all over. Kids with no shoes on. It was just like, where are all these people from? They find it.

They find it. And the conspiracies and all that crap, to me, it's like that. Half the people on my Facebook, I just look at them like, dude, I should just unfollow you. Maybe we need to get Chinese assassins of old people to come over here and make Walmarts, big fly trap Walmarts. And he just, you know, just say, hey, you tired of white people being pushed down? Yes, I am. Well, come on in this room. We're organizing, you know, like having a bunch of different like social honey traps where people just fall into them. Blow up all the Walmarts on Black Friday and then Trump loses.

Could you imagine if we got to a point where we had to start killing people off? Like there's just way too many people and there's no other way around it. China. We got to cull people the same way they want to cull wolves in the greater Yellowstone ecosystem. What the fuck, man? Is that possible? Is it possible? I mean, we keep overpopulating, right?

We're at 7 billion. They project, I think they project 8 billion by 2050. I think that's what they said. See if that's true, Jeremy. There's a lot of middle states, though. Yes. We got a lot of room. We just got to.

But we don't have the water, right? We talked about this, the desalinization. It can't fill up those areas. But don't you think that there's going come a time if we survive right say if there's no super volcanoes no asteroid impacts no plague no nuclear war if we avoid all that shit you know the water's gonna rise we're gonna move in we'll be fine the coast will just be in a different spot it's not that big of a deal i mean it's a big deal obviously but it's not it's not a kill off the deal. I mean, it's a big deal, obviously. But it's not a kill-off-the-population big deal. So if it keeps going and the technology keeps getting better, we just keep making people.

We just keep doing it. The numbers keep rising and rising and rising. And then we get to be like $30 billion, $40 billion, $50 billion. And we have real problems where we don't have enough food. We don't have enough air. We don't have enough food we don't have enough air we don't enough space what are we gonna do make food that's already a thing stupid people for sure no you can't say that cuz that's what Hitler wanted he had he had some good ideas and some bad ideas no I mean there's definitely like like that look this chinese thing that makes complete

sense if they're killing off do you think they're doing that though yes there's too many people in china they cannot have that many people so if they get rid of you know a certain age of people especially if they have mental issues like homeless people you know but we already figured out that the united states has almost 100,000, right? Was it 90-something thousand? Any given day, it said about 90,000. Any given year? Any given day.

There's 90,000 missing. Oh. Not extra missing. Oh, overall. I see, I see. And this is elderly? No, it's just people. Oh, this is different.

Including kids. Well, that's way different. Are they talking about 500,000 elderly or 500,000 people? 500,000 elderly. Ooh, that's a big difference. Oh, 500,000 elderly or 500,000 people 500,000 elderly oh that's a big difference oh yeah they're killing them for sure right right for sure okay that's why i mean they kill kids or they used to but they you know if you yeah that's kind of what i'm saying right about uh populations if they get too high we people aren't valuable anymore 500,000 elderly people go missing in China every year. That is a lot.

80% of the missing people are, I believe. Dude, they're killing people. Do you think that's real? Do you think they're killing people or do you think people just get lost real easy? Look, it's 80% of 80% are elderly. So yes, I believe they're killing them or

72% suffered some sort of memory impairment. Yeah, but it might be a mental health issue. They might just not treat their mentally ill. But look at the numbers in that chart, Jamie. Scroll back up there. Look at that shit. Look at the difference between, what is the earliest part of the chart? 1965.

The population of people over 65. Yeah, but... 1965 to 2015. No, the age thing, Jamie. The bottom of people over 65. Yeah, but... 1965 to 2015. No, the age thing, Jamie. The bottom. 1965 to 2015. Yeah. If you look at the way it runs up to 2015,

that's a spike, man. Mm-hmm. Or at least a steep ramp. And then they're saying that... Whoa, they're killing old people. I know. And they're saying that out of those groups that are missing, a large amount of them have been diagnosed already

With like an illness like Alzheimer's or something like that. So they're already on the way out. They're saying so so they just Some they get rid of it. Yeah, because it's costing them more money And population it's taking up space dude Imagine if we find out that there is a murder racket in China that kills 500,000 old sick people a year. But imagine, I mean, right now we're just looking at a number. But if we found out that is absolutely what was going on.

I think by 2030 they're going to have more than 400 million people over 60 there. Wow. Jesus. And they last longer, the Asians, because they eat so nice. That's so racist. That as a meme is going to be like a racist meme.

People are going to beat your ass. They eat so nice. Isn't that funny? But you said nothing but a good thing. No. You said good things, but it's racial. And so when it's racial, people automatically get recreationally upset. Recreational outrage kicks in, and they'll call you a racist for saying that Asian people

last longer because they eat well. But you just said eat nice. Eat nice. That was a better way to say it, though. Well, my girlfriend's Asian, and she's the most racist of Chinese people of all time. And most Asians hate Chinese people. And you're like, why are you so racist against Chinese people

and she's like oh they're stupid and then you research it and you're like maybe you should let her say these things in there my ex-girlfriend the one that died

in the train crash but then you read all these things like about this and you're like holy shit what's going on in China it's fucked up

over there man well Ari will tell you what's going on in china it's fucked up over there man well ari will tell you what's going on ari's been there i know quite a few people that have been in china somebody just oh tate tate's in china right now yeah he's doing some crossfit shit over there he's doing some stuff with the guy who owns crossfit yeah china's a trip man apparently though there's something like 50 new billionaires are created every day in China. Something insane like that. Here, Tate told me. I should probably know these things before I say them out loud, but you know how it is, folks.

How many new billionaires are created every day in China? What do you say, Brian? 50? Sure. What does it say? Business Insider says, China gets a new billionaire every five days. So not five every day. It's one every five days.

Well, that sounds more likely. So that's 20 a month. No, one every five. One every five days. Six a month. Six a month. Yeah. Wait a minute.

One every five days, there's seven days in a week, there's four weeks in a month. About 30 days every month. 30 divided by five is six. So six times five is 30. So every month they get a billion, except for like February, it's short months. 60 every year. How crazy is that? So it's 60 a year essentially 50 60 a year instead

of 50 60 a day i was only off by a factor of 365 let me see what tate said maybe tate lied to me motherfucker it is a strange place though like when we think about like that language can develop in two different places in two completely different ways like you've got your language that we have over here with our very specific sounds that sound like English, and then they get a little weirder when they go to certain places. Like if you go to, you know, like Germany or like those places that have different sounds

and they have the parts of the world where they have like different sort of sounds like that and then you got china which has got its own kind of weird thing and then on top of that okay here he says they have made uh here each year 409 millionaires made their each day of the year that's more impressive wow that's what it was said. 409 millionaires made there each day and 50 million people living in Shanghai. Okay, that's the 40. That's the 50. That's where I got confused.

Fuck, man. But their language, like when you look at it written down, you're like, this is alien. This is like alien language. Like, we didn't know that Chinese was Chinese. You know, you pass by Chinatown, you go, oh, they have, yeah, Chinese language on the wall. If you went into space and you found that shit on a rock in a cave somewhere,

you'd be like, oh my God, it's alien language. It's so much more sophisticated than ours. Look at the characters. I can't, it can't be deciphered. We would be looking at it like, what is that? These little characters,

these little strange characters and they all know, and they have way more characters than we have letters. Way more. Cause each character is like a word. Yeah. Like waterfalls. Exactly.

Fucked up. What was it supposed to be on your arm? R for Chinese, R for my last name. And there's no such thing as an R in Chinese. Still, they thought you said waterfall. Yeah. Waterfall. Yeah.

Embarrassing. Well, it wasn't a Asian person that did it though, right? No, no, no. Waterfall. Wah-ah-fall. Yeah. Wah-ah. Yeah. Embarrassing. Well, it wasn't an Asian person that did it, though, right? No, no, no. It was a white girl. Of course. She didn't know what the fuck she was writing. That bitch made up some shit on you. She drew on you and made up some shit.

She had a book that actually said, like I said, A, and it showed the symbol B, but it was just bullshit, I guess. People that made that book, they were laughing. They were laughing. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. While they pushed it out the door. Me Chinese, me play joke. I had a tattoo book.

It's racist. Racists do a Chinese accent. But you can do an English accent all day. Isn't that strange? Right? Isn't it odd? He can go, hello. And how are you, Brian Reichel?

And no one will go, you fucking racist. You racist piece of shit. But if you go, If you do that, you fucking racist. You racist piece of shit. But if you go, If you do that, you're racist. Right? That sounds racist. You are mocking the way Chinese people sound. They have an unusual sound.

You hear them talk. It's like a very weird kind of fascinating. I think it sounds cool, but it's a strange sound in comparison to the English that we're used to is it racist though I mean like I've told you about how oh, mr. Brian. Well, yeah But if I just like I told you about this with my girlfriend has to speak Korean So I try to speak Korean like I just try to make the noises not anything racist Like I just try to make the noises and then like every couple you know like 10 seconds she'll be like you just said you know grasshopper you just said taco and like it's weird and then

like fake noises fake noises that sound like like keep doing that with her and you'll learn the language i know just do it constantly just make noises create a database in your head all right you can do it dude i have faith in you in you. I've learned a few words. I used to teach Taekwondo in Korean. Really? Yeah, I used to count in Korean. No way. Do you still know?

Yeah, I think so. I'll probably fuck it up. It was like, Hana, dul, set, net, dos. Nah, I fucked it up already. Dos, yos, ilgo, dul. I'm not saying it very good either. Because my instructor had a very

strong accent it was hard sometimes to understand exactly how to say the words but like uh kicks would be in um in in taekwondo kicks would be you would say them in korean like uh up chuggy i think up chuggy was front kick. Doyochuggy is roundhouse kick. There's like a bunch of different, yeah. I don't remember all of them, though. I forgot a lot of them, man. I forgot a lot of it. I learned how to say, like, I guess it means like gay or something like that.

Of course you did. But you say it as like that or something. Oh, Japanese, right? No, no, no, Korean. Korean, okay. So I embarrass my girlfriend. Like, I'll be in public, and out of nowhere, Japanese, right? No, no, no, Korean. Korean, okay. So I embarrass my girlfriend, like I'll be in public and out of nowhere I'll just turn to me like,

Nookie! And she's like, what did you say? Because I guess it's like really embarrassing. What are you saying? Nookie. Nookie.

Oh, like that Limp Bizkit song? Yeah. I did it all for the Nookie? Nookie! So if they went to see Limp Bizkit they would just start laughing? Oh my God! I can't believe they're saying this.

Is that what would happen? Yeah, probably. Nookie! There was a weird time where, like, it's very strange where a word from some other language means nothing over here. Like, we say words,

and it means, like, something really fucked up over there. Like, we say words, and it means, like, something really fucked up over there. Like, there's certain words, like... Okay, here's a perfect example. Fanny pack. Fanny means vagina in England. Like, how'd that happen? How the fuck did that happen?

Simulation theory. Or fags for cigarettes. They call a cigarette a fag. Or a faggots. You know, like a bundle of nose hairs. You know what that is, man? Here's the thing. There's a misconception about that, the entomology, I think that's the word, of that word, the word faggot.

It's even misspoke on the Louis C.K. show that they said that it was originally, that the reason why they used that term for gay people is because it's a bundle of sticks and they would light the bundle of sticks on fire and so the reason why they call someone a faggot the reason why it was so offensive is because that means that they're to be lit on fire that's not true really no that's not true and it wouldn't have taken long to research this the actual origin what it means is it's a bundle of wood, like a burdensome woman. A faggot is very difficult to carry because it's like a bundle of wood. And it's very difficult to balance a bundle. It's cumbersome.

So a burdensome woman became a faggot. So a guy who acted like a woman, like a burdensome woman, became a faggot. It had nothing to do with lighting anyone on fire. And there's no evidence, I mean, other than isolated hate crimes, there's no evidence of a practice of lighting people on fire. Other than war, you know, some horrible things that people have done when they've conquered cities. They've lit entire villages on fire and shit along those lines. and they've conquered cities. They've lit entire villages on fire and shit along those lines.

But for the most part, even the Salem witch trials, like most people think that they lit those people on fire, most of them were drowned. That's what they did with most of them. They weren't burning witches at the stake, really. But they did drown a bunch of fucking people.

But they didn't, they've done it throughout history, but it's not been something that they practiced on gay people to the point where that became the nickname. Right. Because it was a bundle of wood, they were going to light them on fire. But people love to reiterate that without looking into it.

And it's still a gross word when you're applying it to a homosexual person to sort of dehumanize them. It's still a gross term, but that's not what it originally meant. It meant a burdensome woman. Yeah, I've never heard the fire before, but I've always heard the wood. And like, if you talk to your gay friends, it's okay if they say it back and forth to you.

You gotta be careful. You're such a faggot. You do it around other dudes that are gay that are gonna punch you. Gay dudes are dudes, man. Hey, make sure that I'm correct on that. I'm 99% sure I am. But the etymology of the word faggot

pertains to a burdensome woman, as it pertains. That's one of those things that just gets sort of repeated as an urban myth. Or as a, you know, it's weird how many different fucking slurs there are for people. You know, it almost, in some ways, be better

if there's just one and we use it universally. What would yours be? For everybody. Like, it's too hard to call morons, like, moron is always good like what does it say here jamie right here you see that no make that a little bigger the word faggot has been used in english since the late 16th century in his abusive term for women particularly old women uh in reference to homosexuality may derive from this a female, as female terms are often used with reference to homosexual effeminate men.

What does it say? The application of a term to a woman is possibly the shortening of the term faggot gatherer applied to 19th century people. I'm going to call Milo that from now on. applied to 19th century people. I'm going to call Milo that from now on. Especially older women who made a meager living by gathering and selling firewood. Interesting. Also, the sense of something awkward to be carried.

Okay, that's where it is. So, compared to the use of the word baggage. Okay, that makes sense. As a pejorative term for old people in general so awkward to carry okay yeah so that's essentially it so that's where it came from the comparing men to women not comparing men to something that they light on fire so when people say that it's just not true it doesn't excuse people for slurs but we shouldn't lie you know and that's the problem something sounds so good you want to repeat it over and over again but it's not true like yeah it's terrible to slur people yes

you're right but we should be honest about the origin of words you know and that's not honest but it's something that gets repeated a lot and people don't look into it at all they just want to say it because it sounds awesome and when you say it well the reason why it's so offensive because at one point in time that's what they use to describe a bundle of wood. And when you say it, well, the reason why it's so offensive, because at one point in time, that's what they used to describe a bundle of wood. Okay? So when you just, and your friends, you think you're funny, you think you're casually calling each other faggots, okay?

Calling each other the other F word. How long before faggot becomes the other F word? Has it already happened? Yeah, yeah. Has it already happened? I think so, right? Right? Riders on the storm.

Doom-de-doom-doom-doom. Anything you want to add before we wrap this bitch up? I'll be with George Perez, Ontario, October 20th. Powerful Ontario improv. That's a fun place, man. Good. That's a good spot. We're super lucky in California that we have...

I heard the Oxnard one is the shit. Yeah, me too. That's a good spot we're super lucky in California that we have I heard the Oxnard one is the shit yeah me too that's a new one but think of the just the improv chain alone you've got Oxnard you've got Brea

you've got Irvine you've got Ontario all those fucking badass places to work all within a couple hours drive yeah I mean

if you're like a Southern California comic the improvs are the shit I love it we're lucky we're fucking super lucky. And we didn't even mention Hollywood. Oh, yeah. I mean, there's the big

one in Hollywood, which is one of the oldest and best clubs in the world. I mean, what a strong chain. You know, that's amazing. I work those fucking clubs all the time, man. I'm always there. It's amazing when you stop and think about it. Like, what other fucking city

has that many major clubs that close like that dude we're so lucky yeah but ontario is awesome george perez is awesome too i love working with george he's he's fucking hilarious and he's such a good person so he's a great dude man i love that guy and we have fun we have fun on the shows because they like you know you get this this cool death squad mixed with Mexican audience, and it just works. It's just like great. It's a good time. I bet, man.

He's fun. He's fun. I should do some shows with you guys. Yeah, love it. That'd be fun. Yeah, we should do some. I want to get some of his crowd, see what that's like. Fuck yeah.

Oh, it's a party. It's a party. He's a fun guy. He was a fun guy to do a podcast with, man. He's a smart dude. All right. That's it, you fuckers. We'll be back tomorrow.

And until then, oh, Russell Peters. And that's it. See you guys. Bye. Thank you.