The Joe Rogan Experience - #997 - Pauly Shore

Episode Date: August 10, 2017

Pauly Shore is an actor, comedian, director, writer and producer. Check out his show "The Pauly Shore Podcast Show."

boom and we're live dude you survived what's up buddy all right you survived the joey diaz experience you know i got a i got a um i got a a text from tom tom segura tom right yeah i said because he asked me, we were backstage about to go on stage at the main room and he's like, I want you to do my podcast, blah, blah, blah.

And I'm like, awesome. And then we were texting just about my schedule with him and then he's, and then I'm like, okay, I'm going to go see Joey Diaz, dah, dah, dah, dah.

And he's like, dude, fucking gummy bears, watch out. And I'm like, what are you talking about? I didn't like, I didn't understand what he was talking about. Like I didn't, you know what I mean? I honestly didn't, And I'm like, what are you talking about? I didn't understand what he was talking about.

Like, I didn't, you know what I mean? I honestly didn't, like, I was like, whatever. I don't know what you're talking about. And then once I got there, you know, I smoke weed sometimes. You know, I don't smoke all the time, but I like to smoke weed sometimes. But as far as the edibles, like, Dean Gelber is, like, giving me some, like, pot stuff, like, cookies and shit. But then, like, he was eating these gummy bears and they're in a bag and I was like going, fuck.

Okay. And he gave me just like a, he gave me just like an ear or some shit and that was it. And then I was just like talking to him and then like literally I couldn't talk anymore. I couldn't talk. So you only ate a part of it, right? I only ate a half of one. Well, he's got some. I couldn't talk. So you only ate a part of it. I only ate half of one. And I had to leave. He's got some that are like 500 milligrams, which is just insane.

So you probably had half of that, which is like 250, which is fucking insane. That's an insane amount of weed. Unless you're an OG. Yeah, but I had done mushrooms once before when I was younger and it felt like that. Yeah. Well, that's the risk of repeating myself over and over again, which I do all the time. But when you eat marijuana, it's processed by your liver and it produces something called 11-hydroxy metabolite. It's a totally different psychoactive substance that's four to five times more psychoactive than THC.

So that's why it hits you like that. And that's why people think they got dosed. Because when you smoke pot, it's not psychoactive. But when you eat it, it's processed by your liver. It's something called a one pass. And that's how it produces that. Yeah, and I can't believe he let me drive home. Like, seriously.

I mean, i could have like because when i was driving home i was like dude i gotta go like i stopped i go i can't answer your questions and i said let's i have to go and i left and i drove out and he like he let me drive like you gotta understand joey diaz found his mother dead on the kitchen floor when he was on acid when he was 13 he would let you fly a fucking plane on those things he doesn't give a shit he's just like you'll figure it out cocksucker anyways so when did it hit you like you did a podcast like how how deep into it 15 minutes into it and i couldn't speak i had to stop

like i couldn't speak did you ever release the podcast? I don't know I think he did the audio but not the video I told him not to do the video because I couldn't answer any questions yeah but wouldn't that be funny? yeah I guess I don't know I would like to see myself that fucked up where I can't even talk

yeah those those edibles are fucking terrifying they're goddamn terrifying they're like you know skittles or some shit. He's a different type of human Well, there's a lot of those people now because edibles and marijuana has been legal for so long There's so many medical patients in California that you get these people that have insane Tolerances and they're just doing dabs and eating cookies and just like Jesus and they're just doing dabs and eating cookies and just like, Jesus.

They go down a hole. The whole marijuana movement and that whole thing is so much different than when I was growing up. When I grew up, we used to smoke it. We'd go to the beach, and we'd put a towel over us, and we'd hide it. Now, like last night, I was at the Funny or Die party, and it was the 10th anniversary and i was just walking around it just smells like weed everywhere yeah it's just very normal now like you know that like i don't know that's just the way well i think it's good because

it's just like drinking is normal you know you walk by the bar the comedy store you see a bunch of people having a couple of drinks there's nothing wrong with that yeah it's all good yeah but thanks for having me. My pleasure. Yeah. It's good. So how did you, this impression you're doing with this White House character, what's his name again?

Stephen Miller, yeah. That's, first of all, everyone's doing Sean Spicer. They weren't until he got fired or all these different people. Oh, is it Scaramucci? Yeah, well that too. And Sean Spicer.

But Melissa McCarthy was doing Sean Spicer. Yeah, she killed it.. And Sean Spicer. But Melissa McCarthy was doing Sean Spicer. Yeah, she killed it. Yeah, it's hilarious. You know what's funny? Trump thought that it made him look weak, that a woman was doing an impression of him. A woman should go and do an impression of Trump now because of that. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah. No, I mean, I don't know. I mean, I think that, you know, I did a special. What was it? Yeah. No, I mean, I don't know. I mean, I think that, you know, I did a special. What was it? I think it was like 2012 for Showtime called Politics, where I went to D.C. and I did stand up in D.C.

And I interviewed all. I love politicians like that's all I watch when I come home at night. All I watch is CNN, MSN and Fox just because that's it. Because I'm in shock and I can't believe it. No, I just go back and forth that there's so many fucked up things that are going on in the world. The whole North Korea thing is insane.

It's scary. It's fucking insane. Well, what's scary is that Donald Trump is saying shit like fire and fury that the world has never known. Like, Jesus, dude. Like, this isn't a movie. This is real life.

Yeah. But I mean, this North Korean guy is fucking nuts. He is fucking nuts. He's fucking nuts he is fucking he's fucking nuts it's like it's like dude stop shooting fucking missiles in the fucking this isn't like a playpen thing he just keeps shooting missiles in the ocean all the time like it's like he's like a kid or some shit yeah and he can't it's just i don't know it's just uh well i think guam is only like 2 000 miles miles away from North Korea or something like real close. So they're talking about him possibly bombing Guam.

And that's what they're saying now. Yeah, no, I've been watching it. But that would be a death sentence. I mean, if we decided to attack North Korea, it would be a death sentence to them. And then also I heard, because I know Dennis Rodman. You know, I know Dennis Rodman, you know, I know Dennis Rodman. Do you?

Did you talk to him when he went over there? I know. I don't want to get too, too into it, but I know that he goes over there a lot. Yeah. And he meets with Kim Jong-un. They play basketball or something?

They just fucking get drunk. And I don't know, they go on jet skis or some shit. Really? Like he like, he like, he likes Dennis Rodman. so he brings him out. But from what I heard is that Kim Jong-un really loves Donald Trump.

You know what I mean? He loves America, but he's kind of acting like he doesn't love America. Like he loves the American way. Look at that picture. Yeah. Look at that picture. Yeah. So my point is, I think, I really think that if Donald Trump went over there to meet with the guy, I think that would appease him and just chill him the fuck out.

I think. That's just my opinion. Maybe you should be like a liaison. Yeah, see, there you go. like a liaison. Yeah, see, there you go. But he gets, he gets, you know, he goes over there and hangs out with him

because the Kim Jong-un kid loves, loves, he loves America. Yeah, he loves America. And that's, it's just kind of like a weird, you know, there's no,

what's the word? There's no, I don't know, communication. Communication, they're not communicating right, you know? Yeah, well, what's the word there's no I don't know communication they're not communicating right you know yeah well there's language barrier obviously but isn't he young isn't Kim Jong Un like in his 30s how old is he

yeah he's pretty young I mean imagine running a military dictatorship in your 30s and he's already murdered a gang of people and the thing that's so crazy about the whole thing is that like you think of ISIS and you think of that whole you know how those people like they don't care to die and they don't care if they're gonna die and i think that he's trained his people all this you see all he's on cnn all these marching soldiers yeah i think those guys are

ready to die well if you lived in a shithole like north korea where every day you're under the oppressive boot of a military dictatorship, maybe you'd be ready to die too. You're like, it's either escape to South Korea or die. Yeah. I think what should happen is I think Trump should hire Dennis Rodman and like put like a tracking device on them and their jet skiing out and fucking the ocean and drinking and

shit. And then seal team six comes in and fucking takes Kim Jong-un and flies into America and then gives all the North Korean internet and sets them free. No? This is like a movie, dude. Don't you get together with Stephen Baldwin? You guys could do an amazing movie. I just think that there's probably a way to chill everything out.

There probably is a way to chill everything out. This is not the way. Like launching test missiles and saying fire and fury and all that shit. Not cool. That's not not chilling anything out.

But you know I don't understand what the conflict is about in the first place. I'm not exactly sure what everybody's angry about. I think because they think that we're going to bomb them.

But why are we going to bomb them? That's what I don't understand. Because I think that we did years ago, right? The Hiroshima shit. Well, North Korea. No, Hiroshima was Japan. Well, like that because I think that we did years ago right the Well North Korea no Hiroshima was Japan the Asians I think I Don't know the details Part of the world, but that's cool

Super psyched Conflate the two of them Yeah, no, it's um mean we did horrible things during the Korean War to the North Koreans I mean, that's literally the cause of all of this all the Korean War to the North Koreans. I mean, that's literally the cause of all of this, all the anger. But that's when North Korea and South Korea were split and North Korea went communist. It's all a byproduct of that. You could read about it. Actually, there's a really good book called Dear Reader from Michael Malice.

He's a guy who was on my podcast. The history of that part of the world is really fucked up. But it's interesting because you have North Korea, and then below you have South Korea. South Korea, you have a thriving economy, amazing electronics, Samsung. They make all kinds of great shit over there. Nice spas, probably. Yeah, a lot of plastic surgery. A lot of cream. And then North Korea's just right next door to them terrible dictatorship it's fucked up man

well no president has been able to deal with it so no yeah and probably won't be able to mean how do you resolve that one of the things that malice was telling me that makes it so fucked up is that everybody has to rat on everybody else like say if you and I were working together we would have to go somewhere malice was telling me that makes it so fucked up is that everybody has to rat on everybody else like say if you and i were working together we would have to go somewhere and tell someone what each one of us did wrong during the day like maybe you didn't cry hard enough when somebody died or maybe you weren't uh excited enough when something good happened you didn't cheer loud enough and they'll they'll rat you out for that and then you know you have to be accountable and then so they have like a culture of rats everybody's ratting everybody

out sounds fun we don't realize how lucky we are you know to live in america we do it's one of the reasons why people complain so much about stuff it's because we're so soft or any slight little thing that's wrong have you ever been to prison before no never well i went to alcatraz but just to visit yeah never been arrested i always think like spending time in prison would make you appreciate just the simple things because you always see yeah you always see like you know people that are incarcerated they get out and they like see the sunlight and they're like, Oh my God, this is fucking awesome. And part of me is like,

I think everyone should maybe go to prison for like a month just to like kind of get that, get their normal freedoms taken away from them. You know, I'm actually doing a benefit and I was going to ask you if you want to do it. I don't know if you're in town at the comedy store for the innocence project. Are you familiar with them? Yeah,

I am. Yeah. So I'm doing it the comedy store for the Innocence Project. Are you familiar with them? Yeah, I am. Yeah. So I'm doing it. I'm doing it on August 27th. They use DNA to release people that are incarcerated or innocent. Yeah. Yeah. So if you want to do it, I got everyone's doing it already.

It's August 27th. And it's for, you know, Barry Sheck and that whole team of people that exonerate, you know, people that go to prison for crimes they didn't't commit you know that whole thing, right? Yeah Well, I'm flying in from DC. Oh, that's on Sunday. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I can do that. Yeah, that'd be great Yeah, I'll do it. Yeah, that'd be great. I got a great lineup I got um, everyone's on it already, but I was gonna ask you and I'm sure you'd be into that Yeah, I'm in that you see the night before. before oh cool i'm flying in but yeah so i want to raise money for them yeah because i want to give i want to give money back to these guys because

when they get out of the jail they don't have anything yeah and they're not given anything right given like a dollar you know what i mean i know and then they have to somehow another figure out how to sue to get some compensation for the fact they were wrongly imprisoned how'd you like to be in prison for 20 years knowing you had nothing to do with it? And there's people that are in prison for killing their mom and stuff like that. Imagine someone kills your mom, it's not you, and then you get arrested and go to jail for it. Yeah. That's terrible.

But the fruit person at the end of the bar is pretty cool. You going to eat here? Just have a small thing of fruit. Okay, you're okay? Did you see? Your blood sugar's so low you're like i can't i can't wait 15 minutes no but did you see the fruit man at the corner no i did not there's a fruit there's like a little mexican fruit guy he chops up the fruit don't tell ice

sorry yeah he'll pull that guy across the border bring him back yeah so So how did you, what was the thought process behind doing the impression of this dude? It's become viral. It's over a million hits now, right? Yeah. Yeah. It's like at a million seven. Wow. Around that, yeah.

And it's caught on. It's just, I don't know. You've been doing this. You've been doing this a long time. Who did the makeup for you? How'd they do up your hair? You know the business. Statue of Liberty facts.

Yeah, you just do these things and certain things catch on, certain things don't catch on, and this thing caught on. So I don't know. I was pretty stoked. Is that him back in the day? That's him now? Yeah. He doesn't look like that now, now though he's way more bald than that

no yeah he's um um but yeah no it was cool it was uh i i've done stuff with them before i actually did an anthony wiener sketch too i don't know if you saw that one no i did yeah it's pretty cool i did that where i play anthony wiener i did that about four or five six months ago and then this Anthony Weiner sketch too. I don't know if you saw that one. No, I did. Yeah. It's pretty cool. I did. I play Anthony Weiner. I did that about four or five, six months ago. And then this thing came up, they just hit me up. And then,

you know, I do stuff for Funny or Die sometimes. And, and this thing caught on and it went everywhere. And I was on CNN and, and, and, uh,

you know, every, you know, even political, uh, political, um, sites picked it up the hill. And all these different places picked it up. So, I don't know.

I just did it. And I don't know. You know what I mean? Yeah, no, I get it. You just do shit and, like, you don't know what the fuck happened. So, yeah, I was stoked. The Wiener thing is funny. I saw the Wiener thing, too.

Wiener, I think Wiener's a comic. He's hilarious. I think he's a comic. He's hilarious. He doesn't know it. I mean, he's still committed to being the, I mean, he tried to be the mayor. If it wasn't for the latest scandal, he would have come close. 100%.

Yeah. And did you see his documentary? Yes. Great. It's so good. It's amazing. It's so fucked up. It's so good.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. So you see, I'm lasting okay. So you didn't give me any edibles. I'm not going to give you any edibles. At this point in the Joe Diaz, I was like, dude, I got to go. He kept asking me questions. I couldn't answer anything. No, I wasn't going to do that to you.

Imagine if everybody that I know did that to you. Every time Segura did it to you, I did it to you. Red Band does it to you. But I've heard everyone kind of can't handle it. Most people. Well, the numbers that Joey puts up, no. Very few humans can handle it. But don't you think, back to Anthony Weiner,

I think that guy should have been a comic. Like, he's got this idea about what's good and what's bad, but he's also a pervert. And I'm like, the guy's a comic. He's a great speaker. He's hilarious. He's hilarious. He obviously loves pussy.

Obviously. He loves pussy. I mean hilarious. He obviously loves pussy. Obviously. He loves pussy. I mean, he's a fucking character. I mean, I just think that he's trapped in that suppressed world of being a politician where he obviously doesn't fit those standards. There's those standards of behavior that they demand of you that are all bullshit anyway. But he's too fucked up. He's too crazy.

I think the more fucked up things that people find out about the politicians, the more popular they become. Some of them. I mean, right? Yeah. If he could be clean about it, if he could come clean about all of it and tell like the, but still, well, in the day of Trump, things are way different, right?

Because Trump got elected a month after that grab them by the pussy thing came out everybody thought that was going to sink his boat like that's it and he still wins so i think the world is different but i don't think wiener has the constitution that trump has trump say what you want about him but the motherfucker has teflon for skin things just bounce right off him he doesn't give a shit he's just like yeah insane yeah yeah i i um i know him from back in the day yeah yeah i mean you have to understand i've been doing this how long you've been doing it 30 years 29 yeah so i've been doing it 30 years when did you come to the store what year 94 94 yeah so you were there is that when you came to the store yeah 94 94 i became a paid regular wow yeah so i was um

i was doing spring break for mtv when was it it was like 89 90 91 92 and it was you know obviously the biggest thing in the world because it was live and there's hundreds of thousands of kids i did spring break in 2000 for MTV. Okay. Right when it was sort of like on the way out. Right. Yeah. And we did it and it was Hawaiian tropics

were the biggest thing in the world, all the girls. And Fabio was there. And John Lovitz was there. Vince Neal was there. Kennison was there. Rodney Dangerfield was there. And Donald Trump was there and, uh, John Lovitz was there. Vince Neal was there. Kennison was there. Rodney Dangerfield was there and Donald Trump was there. And cause Donald Trump used to go to the Hawaiian, Hawaiian tropic parties that Ron Rice, um, used to throw after, you know, the spring break things and Donald Trump was, I knew him back then. So,

and then I saw him probably about a a couple times at the playboy mansion the last time i saw him at the playboy mansion i think was about four years ago and he was just there just hanging just hanging like bill maher you know what i mean just fucking like bill maher you know just fucking hang it was it was actually in the afternoon and i think it was like uh a sunday fun day thing or it was like some like Easter egg night day or some shit. And he was just buzzing around and in his suit and just talking to girls. And, you know, and yeah, him and OJ, you know. Oh, OJ.

OJ will be out, too. I know. Isn't that bizarre? So what is Donald Trump like when you're hanging around with him? He just likes vagina. You know what I mean? Like he just like us, you know, like know like you know he's look at those babes or you know it was always like right i mean that's why anyone go to the playboy mansions because they like vagina right and we were lucky to get into the playboy mansion we were very fortunate you know what i mean to get

in there and um but it was but so you know and i was actually talking to kellyanne conway about um right before trump got elected on email and i was supposed to have dinner with her and some of her friends but i had to go do some shows in west palm at the improv so i had to cancel out you're gonna talk to kellyanne conway about who cares just to be there of course how weird it would have been hilarious i wanted to you know what i mean for sure but she was cool we were on i have her email i have her information and stuff wow yeah you should get her on your show well you put her on your show oh yeah i would definitely talk to her yeah does it feel weird though to be connected to them now i haven't actually in yeah once yeah

once she got once they got in and i started to see all that stuff that was going on, I kind of backed off and I was like, you know what I mean? Yeah. I didn't want to really be, you know. Yeah. But I wanted to be the vagina coordinator for him. That was my M.O. You want to be the guy that hooks it up?

Yeah, that gets in vagina. You can't be public about that. You can't talk about it. So if you talk about it, you're going to fuck it up for him. Oh, that's true. Right now, you're fucking it up for him. Okay. This is just a bit, folks.

Yeah, we're just playing. It's not real. Paulie's just playing. But how great would that be? The idea is that he's got the Trump plane. Right. You know, the Trump plane. It's sitting there. Where's it sitting? Somewhere. Right? Where is that plane? It's got to be

sitting in a tarmac somewhere. So I want him to let me borrow it so I can pick up vagina from in the Midwest. The girls midwest is the move well yeah the people that voted for him oh they're happy for him yeah that hot the flower states bring some you know one tooth wonders bring him bring him to the because dude he hasn't gotten anything think about it right he's been like cut off strange 100 Do you think so? 100%. There's like a basement that they have in the White House.

There is no way he's getting vagina. So none of them do? Do you think none of the presidents? Like with modern presidents. I guess like Bush on. Bush, Obama, now Trump. There's no way they can, right? I don't think so.

Clinton kind of fucked it up for everybody. He fucked it up. Yeah. Who was it? Linda Tripp? Was that the lady who ratted that Monica Lewinsky girl out? That poor girl? I feel more bad for her than anybody.

Like, she did some article about her where she said the shame sticks to you like tar. Ugh. I was like, can you imagine? Poor girl's 20 years old. I would just own it at this point I guess she's got it right you know what I mean so what is Trump like though

is he a good guy to talk to like what is he like obviously he didn't want to run for president back then I think he'd been wanting to I mean if you look at clips now you see a lot of clips where he was where they interview him and now about like you find clips in the 90s where they always say, who is it, the guy from, I forgot that one show on MSN. But Tim something, I don't know, he died.

But he said, well, if you were president, da, da, da, da. Oh, yeah, meet the press. Yeah, I've seen that. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Actually, I was watching that today where he was talking about North Korea. It was a whole clip where he was talking about North Korea from 1999. I never really engaged in, like, heavy conversation with him. It was always kind of just, you know, we smiled at each other.

It was just that, you know. So I never, like, went out to dinner with him or anything. Right. Yeah, I was supposed to do Celebrity Apprentice. They asked me to do Celebrity Apprentice when they had the second iteration of Fear Factor. When Fear Factor came back in, like, what is it, 2011 or 12 or whatever it was. And I just was like, I don't want to do it. I don't want to be in New York for three months.

I don't want to work on this show. It just seems kind of gross. And now that I think about it, I'm like, it's probably a good move. Because, like, what if I did it and then, got in an argument with with him like what if he hated me and now i have this fucking feud like rosie does because rosie o'donnell it seems like it consumes her like her fucking twitter feed is it still oh my god it's all about trump she's always tweeting about trump being a piece of shit and a loser, and he tweets about her. That's hilarious.

They're grown people. Yeah, there's more right there. Look at that. Oh, Donald, looking bad, honey. Wow. Take time to take care of you. It's only Wednesday. Golf, sweetie, golf.

That's hilarious. Oh my god. That's hilarious. But how can she say anything about anybody looking bad? That's what. Oh my god. But how can she say anything about anybody looking bad? That's what's even more dumb. Wow, there she is. I mean, she's crazy.

I don't know. It's just like, feuds like that, they're not healthy. They consume you. Not good. Not good. Not good at all. So are you going to continue doing this dude? What's his name again? Stephen Miller. I guess if he keeps messing up and they want me to do it.

Yeah, you could do a whole bunch of things with him, right? Him explaining things to different people. I think it's more if he messes up. Yeah. You know what I mean? I think it's more if he goes on the, you know, I just wanted to get back on that press stage. Because once he's on there, then they start, you know what I mean?

Right. And that's when he becomes... You know what's weird is when George Bush was president, I was doing some shows in D.C. and me and Dean Gelber, we went to the White House and we actually went into that room,

the press room, and it's actually like fucking small. Yeah, it's pretty little. Have you been in it? No, but I've seen it on TV when they show it from the back of the room. Yeah, but it's almost like this big. It's pretty small. I was like, whoa.

You know what I mean? It's weird. You expect it to be grand. Yeah. Yeah. But the White House, have you been to the White House before? No. Just the tourists walk through?

No. It's fucking weird. I'm sure. It's so weird. You know what's weird is how close it is to the street House before? No. Like, just the tourists walk through? No. It's fucking weird. I'm sure. It's so weird. You know what's weird is how close it is to the street. Yeah.

I was by it. I drove by it, but that was back when people had, like, muskets, you know? Like, they really, you couldn't, when they built

that stupid fucking thing, they didn't give themselves enough space. Yeah. Like, if somebody just pulled up with a high-powered rifle, it's right there.

It's just weird that people, like, you watch House of Cards? Mm-mm. It's right there. It's just weird that people live... Like, you watch House of Cards? It's a great show. But it's weird because they're engaging in all sorts of illicit activity, and there's windows everywhere. It's probably unrealistic, but...

But how many people have lived in that fucking house? That's what's even weirder, you know? 45 different presidents all living in this one spot. I know, It's crazy. They have to be saying that shit to each other. I mean, Bill Clinton or Trump's got to be saying Trump's got to be saying

this is the place that Bill Clinton got blown. This is the area. Look how close it is. Look on the left side and the right side. Look how close it is to the street. I guarantee you I could hit that with an arrow. You're going to D.C., right? Yeah.

And you've been there. August 26th. Do you like D.C.? I like working there. Yeah. Because they feel like they need to blow some steam off. They're kind of wild. They're kind of fun.

Hey, as far as your stand-up and stuff, like, you know, obviously, you know, we're peers. You know, and I see you and watch you and stuff like that. At what point did your stuff, like, just really start to blow up? Do you know what I mean? Like, really go from clubs? Because you were working clubs like I'm working clubs. And then all of a sudden, now you're working, like, bigger places. Like, at what point was it?

About five years ago? Four years ago? Well, longer than that ago. was it the netflix specials i did i did theaters in some places but um it's probably my it all started changing in 2009 that's when i i did a comedy central special on spike tv first and then they're aired on Spike TV and then Comedy Central. Yeah, I started doing bigger places. Then I started selling out theaters of like 2,000 seats in some markets. But, you know, it would take me like a few months. And then there was the next Comedy Central special. That was another big bump.

Then I was selling out places like the Belco in Denver, which is like 5,000. Wow. But it would take a little longer to sell out. Wow. But now with the Netflix special, it changed everything. Wow. Netflix is just a completely different thing.

Wow. So many people have Netflix, man. I know. And if you work on it on a special, you know, and you really put together something good, they can say,

oh, you know, this guy, he actually is a real comic. He really actually is funny you know and then they want to come see you and then it's your responsibility to not fuck them make sure you do a good job and keep writing new shit yeah constantly keep producing new shit right but what does it feel like to be out of the clubs i still do clubs though i know that i did wise guys

i get it but you're you're in you're playing bigger things yeah what does that feel like to you is it dope it's great i feel like to you? is it dope? it's great, it's fun it's a different kind of show though it's like there's more pausing it's more theatrical it's a bigger stage, moving around more there's really good to it but

I wouldn't say it's better it's just different it's better financially but it's just different. But it must make you feel good. Yeah, it feels good. Yeah, yeah. That's awesome.

Because I've played big places, and I've also played clubs, but now I'm mostly playing. I play clubs, yeah. Yeah. So, you know, play all the same clubs. Yeah, I like playing clubs, though. Clubs, it's like you're connected to the people. It's intimate, you know? the people it's intimate you know yeah how often you turn i don't know i kind of go in spurts you know i'm working a lot i mean i don't work a lot at the store during the week because i'm

like so exhausted from editing and i edit and edit all day long what are you editing i'm editing um well i finished the show on Crackle. That took a long time. That's your interview show. Yeah, that's on now. That's on Crackle. And I was editing that. And I spent a lot of time on those videos.

And then from there, I did the documentary, Pauly Shore Stands Alone, which was on Showtime. And now it's on Amazon. That's just the straight doc that came out a couple years ago i had such a good time filming that that i kept shooting and the whole thing is about me moving my mom out of the house you know out of the big you know house because when i did the original doc it was just kind of like kind of skimming the concept of that and then i go fuck i gotta start doing that so I cut into it's a six part series almost like my version of Making the Murder

but I don't kill anyone obviously but it's a six part kind of series based off the original doc so we've been putting that together and that's fucking dope dude people might not know so I think we probably should say it's fucking dope your mom's probably one of the most important if not the most important

characters ever in the history of standup comedy, like her running and owning the comedy store in the glory days of Kinison and prior. And now today, even, you know, like she, she set the stage, you know, I mean, out of all the people that helped me and like were important to me in my career, your mom was pretty uniquely significant. You know, she, she just. Yeah, she, she created, you know, my dad and mom started the place in 72.

You know, I was four. And then. That's so crazy. Yeah. And then they got divorced. She won the comedy store in the divorce. He says he gave it to her. You know, there's still like a friction there with that concept.

I wasn't, you know, I don't remember. I was a fucking four years old. And then my mom became who she really was. You know, you're a comic. I'm a comic. That's who we are. She became a creative kind of force. And she came into the limelight at a time where everyone needed someone like that.

Yeah. You know what I mean? Like instead of just like a club owner you know she was creative you know that's why i think part of the reason why she's sick now is because she's not she was never like a real business business person you know she's she was a woman so it was really hard so but she was so good at fucking like roseanne wear susp wear suspenders. You know, Gary Shanley, put a sweater on. You know what I mean? Just different things that she would help develop. And that, to me, is what the store is missing now. Do you understand?

Like, there's no Mitzi Shore. There's no Mitzi Shore there to really garnish these comics. I love Adam to death. He's fucking doing an awesome job. He is. Yeah, but it's not Mitzi Shore. Right. And that, to me, is something that I think we have to death. He's fucking doing an awesome job. He is. Yeah, but it's not Mitzi Shore. Right. And that to me is something that I think we have to do.

I think it's our responsibility to kind of give back to the younger guys and maybe spend a little more time there on a Monday night or something and really kind of help these kids out and give them some direction because there is no direction. There's no Mitzi Shore there. So that's who she

was. That's who she was. That's who she is. And that, to me, is what her best quality was. When she first met my dad, it was in the 50s. And my dad was a touring comic. And my dad did a show or a summer in a place called Elkhart Lake, Wisconsin. And he was doing all summers. Like, that's what you did in the 50s. You'd play there the whole.

It was a camp. And my mom worked for the boss of the camp. And my mom used to type my dad's jokes in the back. Yeah, she would type the jokes in the back. Oh, this is good. That's not good. You know, and she would write it down. Wow.

And then she would say, this stunk. This was good. That was good. That's not good. And then she just developed my, helped develop my dad'sunk. This was good. That was good. That's not good And then she just developed might help develop my dad's act They started dating they had sex and then my dad took off and then he was in Toledo Ohio and then got a call from my mom saying I'm pregnant with Scott and Scott's you know Just turned 64 65 years old. So So back then you have a kid whether you want to or you don't you know

what i mean the abortion thing didn't really exist i mean it did i'm sure but he didn't never wanted a kid and he never wanted to get married and he never wanted all of his kids he didn't want us he just wanted to do what i was doing what i do which was just bang vagina go on the road have a good time you know which is which which was my mo when, go on the road, have a good time. You know, which was my MO when I first started, you know what I mean? And that got taken from him. So in his day, did you ever talk to him about what it was like to tour

back then? Because it wasn't really comedy clubs back then, right? No, it was more like strip clubs, strip clubs, bars, bowling alleys, you know, places that I play now. But it had to be a real trip to go from that to being a part of the original comedy club. I mean, other than like the Ice House right now is the oldest comedy club in the country. But because that's because it started in like 1960.

But the store, was it 72? Is that what you said? 72, yeah. That's incredible. Yeah. You really stop and think about that, how long ago that was. Before that, there wasn't really. Well, the improv was actually.

The improv in New York. Yeah, the improv in New York. Yeah. There was Catch a Rising Star in New York. What was that? That was sort of around that time. Yeah. It was a new thing.

Yeah. So like your mom and your dad well my mom my dad the way it the way it happened was frank senes who owns the building who owned the building said to my dad and his friend rudy deluca said hey sammy you want to start a comedy room because he owned the building where cirrhosis and that that whole, that whole building there or the room right there and the original room actually, which was, which was, which was what it was originally. And my dad said, okay. And then Rudy, my dad's, my dad's, uh, writing partner, Rudy DeLuca said, well, what do we call it? You know, let's do it. And then my dad was like,

let's call it the Sammy Shore room. right and then rudy's like that's fucking stupid you know what i mean we're not going to do that and then they asked my mom and my mom's the one that said let's call it the comedy store so she's the one who came up with the name so they started the comedy store my dad was like the alcoholic mc you know he was partying he was a fucking alcoholic dude big time like he loved jmb was his favorite drink and he would go on stage and um he'd bring up red fox pat mccormick you know um you know murray langston you know all these older guys yeah and my mom would work the cover booth you know where tommy used to work in that little area right there and she used to

give out like um like little um peppermints and stuff you know to the guests that little area right there. And she used to give out like, um, like little, um, peppermints and stuff, you know, to the guests that would come in. And then my dad would go on the road and open for Elvis and open for, um, Engelbert Humperdinck and Sammy Davis and Sinatra and all these people. And my mom's always started to take over the club while he was gone. Like her heart, you know what I mean? She, her, she put her heart into the club and that's kind of where it started. And they were never happy to begin with. They were never happy. So it was time for the divorce.

And then my dad just gave her the club, gave her the house and took off. So he just wanted to be back on the road. Yeah. But he's to this day, he's fucking pissed about it because he never got a piece of the comedy store. Wow. He never got a piece of the comedy store. Wow.

He never got a piece of the comic store. And I think that's terrible because he's the one that fucking started it. Right. If it wasn't for him, there would be no comic store. If he never had sex with my mom in Elkhart Lake, Wisconsin, there would never be no comedy store. Period. That's deep.

Period. That's deep. So that's why my dad needs to get more, in my opinion, needs to get more credit. He never gets any credit. It's always about her. Yeah. I never met him. I never met your dad. He's the fucking man. He's the man. I believe you. He's fucking awesome. Yeah. 90 years old. When you were growing up, did Kennison really babysit you? Did that ever really happen?

Did Kennison really babysit you? Did that ever really happen? Because that was always like... I'll tell you who the babysitters were. Kennison never babysat me. The babysitters were like Lois Bromfield, Jack Perdue, Mike Binder, Argus Hamilton, Mitchell Walters, Alan Stevens. Mike Binder from Bizarre? For sure. Yeah, Mike Binder was fucking awesome, dude.

He was awesome. They used to take him to Little League, you know? Really? Yeah. Wow. At the Beverly Hills Park, yeah. But Mike Binder, Mike Binder is fucking, he was like the, him and Alan Burski were like the youngest guys

that came on the scene. But Mike Binder, he used to take me to skate parks and all that shit because my mom was busy at the club, so she always gave me the comedians. As far as Kennison, I was a shorter to cook at the comedy store in westwood i used to cook for everyone there's 200 people there because i was a good cook because my parents divorced and um i took care of the whole i make not i had there's like a menu in my mom's office polly's menu nachos hamburgers everything i would cook really good and that's where i first met sam

i was 14 wow because he was like the doorman there. You were working there as a cook at 14? Yeah, because I wanted to save up for a saltwater fish tank. Because my mom wouldn't buy me a saltwater fish tank. Wow. I wanted to get a 100-gallon saltwater fish tank. See, when I came around in 94, I don't think the Westwood Club was around. When did it die? It closed, I think, 84.

Oh, wow. Yeah. That's too bad. I heard that place was wild. It was like the bastard club. It was like where everyone, you know, like, you know, I mean, Arsenio, Paul Rodriguez, Andrew Dice Clay. They would like go there and it was like off the beaten path. Yeah.

And they would work out there. And then like the Howie Mandels would be in the main room at the store and all that stuff. Yeah. Yeah. Howie Mandel, even back then. Isn't that crazy? Oh, he was fucking awesome. He huge yeah huge it's weird you know seeing him on all these game shows and stuff like that he went up on a comedy store the other night and i heard someone say he does

comedy and i was like wow that's so weird like people they don't even think about it you see him on television as a host of a game show you kind of forget that he was this huge stand-up before i ever even did it yeah huge before i did open my glass yeah he put a glove over his head and blow it up with his nose he he would play that little kid that little bobby oh yeah bobby was great yeah he did that he actually did a cartoon remember bobby's world right yeah i know it's a weird it's a weird like i was at the funny or die thing last night and I was with Will Ferrell not to drop names but I'm a huge fan of him and and he owns the site and we were talking and and he just gave it up to me he's like dude you started it all you know and he goes I used to watch you on MTV and Encino Manita this generation doesn't know what I did most of the

kids the 25 and younger they don't know that i started mtv they don't know all the films they don't know they think sandler they think all these other guys yeah they don't know that i was the first i was you know at the time because mtv was so big yeah you were the first celebrity you and like dennis leary like dennis leary became a big celebrity off mtv too and then it was like remote control some He started some movies but I was starting in a lot of movies. Yeah. And I was doing albums, albums, all that stuff

and I was in my 20s and I was having an awesome time. That had to be weird. It was awesome. But growing up like in the store, like from the time

you were as old as you could remember, being a part of the comedy store and then all of a sudden being 20 and being famous. Yeah, on MTV.

It was the best. When MTV was gigantic. Look it, I had my own billboard. It was sick. How weird was that? I was a kid. And look, I had sold out all the shows at the Roxy. I had an album, and I was doing all of it at once.

Was it weird? It was so much fun. It was so much fun. It was so much fun. That's why now when I look back on my films, I get kind of sad. Why? Because that time in my life was my happiest time. Why does it make you sad?

Because it was really amazing. And now life is still good, but it's not like it was so what what changed well i think for a lot of people in their 20s at least my opinion when you're in your 20s if you fuck up it doesn't really matter and it's in life is like one big like whatever and that's kind of what i miss now like when you get older like things, you know, mom's sick or this. You know, there's all these, like, things. Right, life things.

Life things, you know, or like, I'm going to be 50 next year. You know what I mean? Just, like, things, like, when you're younger. Dude, I used to have, like, me and my friends, we used to go to the beach and smoke pot. You know, we used to go to the Roxy. We used to go to the Rainbow. It was like. Why can't you still do that?

Because I don't feel like it. You know what I mean? Why does it make you sad that you don't feel like doing those things? What do you feel like doing? Going to the Korean bathhouse and watching the news and chilling and drinking juice. Well, then do that. That's what I do. So why is that sad? That's what's confusing.

I wouldn't say it's sad. No, I was talking... No, not... The movies, watching the movies make me sad because I miss starring in films. So what happened? Like, why did that dry up? I think it's several reasons. You know, number one, I was so big.

And I think the bigger you are and the faster you make it, the harder you fall. I think that's just, like, normal. Because it was like you can only, you what i mean that was one thing and also i think the whole weasel thing was like it was cool for a while and then like after a while it's not cool just like a lot of things and i also think i didn't listen to my agents and managers they told me not to do um in the army now remember i did that was a good movie no i know but here's the story behind it what happened was is i had a three album deal at disney i had encino man's son-in-law these big hits for me did really well and then it came time to do my third movie and it was in the army now and my managers

and agents were like um we don't know you know you have to cut all your hair off and all that shit and the script's kind of like okay and new line approached us with this other film called totally london which is me being an au pair in london which i thought was actually a really funny idea and jeffrey katzenberg who used to run disney wouldn't let me do that movie at new line you know being an au pair in london so he bought the script and shelved it. So I did In the Army Now. In the Army Now didn't do as good as the other films. And then after that, Disney didn't sign me a nut to do more movies. And then after that, I did Jury Duty.

And Jury Duty didn't do so good. You know what I mean? Right. Financially. So it was when the movie started to drop. Maybe Poor Choices, do you think? Yeah, yeah, exactly. Not listening to my agents and

managers and stuff at the time but i didn't come at it like fuck you i came at it like i want to work i love acting i love going to the set that's another thing is like i did an adam sandler film i don't know the the uh the last one he did the um sandy wexler and you know you go up on the set you know and adam's starring in this film and i'm not, you know what I mean? And I used to star in films and it's, it's a, it's a weird feeling for me. Like I'm happy to be on the set and I love Adam and he's an old dear friend and I'm super happy for him, but I was starring in films. Right. You know what I mean?

And everywhere I go, people say, why aren't you starring in films? Like what, what's up? And like, I can't answer it. You know what I mean? You know, poor choices choices the weasel shit dried up um you know the movies didn't perform as well i didn't listen to my agents i wasn't like doing drugs it wasn't like i got all fucked up it's just one movie didn't do so good then the next movie didn't do so good and then they eventually just stopped coming yeah

because you think about it like it's a business yeah biodome didn't do as good as jury duty even though now like it's a big hit it's a cult cult hit for me but at the time you know what i mean and and then yeah and then i got a sitcom on fox and that didn't go so things were like and then i was also turning 30 and i was my 30th birthday was very emotional for me i cried a lot on my 30th birthday because i was going from like a boy to a man and i didn't know how to do it you know what i mean i was just like i didn't know like i didn't know how to i didn't know how to deal my 40th birthday was awesome it was great you know i was happy you know what I mean? Yeah. My 50th birthday, I'll probably cry again. It's an every 20 year thing.

Yeah, exactly. But, so I miss starring in films, you know? I miss it. I miss it. I love acting. That's my first love, I think, you know? I mean, you were on fucking TV. I didn't really like acting.

Really? Yeah. Yeah, I didn't. I mean, it's okay. Because you were great on that show. Yeah. Well, I loved that show well I loved that show I loved working with those people

but I've done some other acting it's okay it's not my thing stand up comedy to me is more fun and then hosting you love hosting I like doing the UFC working for the UFC and doing stand up comedy and doing commentary for the UFC those things are fun

doing this is fun but um acting to me was like long hours waiting around and then also a lot of actors are cool but there's like 10 they're just fake they're just weird sociopaths they're just they care about themselves they're complete narcissists yeah they don't have, I just can't connect with them. So there was a lot of that. Because I think you're a good actor, and I think that if you maybe developed a show or a film for you, I think it would be awesome. That sounds like torture. Really?

Yeah. You're saying that. I'm like, ugh. Really? Stuck on a set. Yeah. You just don't enjoy acting. Yeah.

One of the things that was appealing about Fear Factor was no actors and so it was like oh I don't have to act but I can still be on TV and make some money okay let's do it right

you know and I felt like it was gonna get cancelled I was like this is just gonna be some horrible disaster and then I'll go have some jokes about it

and I'm like I'll definitely get like at least 10 minutes of material on this fucking show you know huge hit huge hit Yeah, why not shit doing a hundred and fifty four episodes or something you get with you get like Get something you don't get the same residuals that you would get for a sitcom though, but is it called?

What's it called when there's over a hundred episodes? Syndication syndication yes, it's in syndication you got syndication money well syndication money is not what everybody thinks it is syndication money like news radio went to syndication so i got syndication money from that but it's not like jerry seinfeld syndication money see he owns a piece of the show then you get the real money but you get i mean you can't complain it's a lot of money yeah my friend um peterff, he owns Hawaii Five-O, which is on CBS. The original one? No, this one that's on right now. The new one.

But he went over 100 episodes. That's the big payday. So he's got like a fucking $7 million house in Malibu. And he's just like, oh, my God. Having a big old party. Oh, my God. I would imagine as soon as it goes over 100, you just go, yes! Oh, my God, right?

Yeah. Yeah, well, you know, Kevin James, a buddy of mine, he, King of Queens went over 100. Oh, wow. And when it goes over 100, as long as you don't fuck up, you're pretty much set. As long as you don't go crazy, you don't start doing meth and buying yachts.

Yeah. Yeah, so maybe stuff like this will bring you back to films, you know? I miss it, you know what I mean? I miss it, you know? And that's why I was happy that the Stephen Miller thing, you know, worked out for me, you know? I wonder what would be the strategy to get back to it. I guess, like, to kick ass at a comedy special would be a good way to do it. To put together, like, a really good comedy special.

That'd be cool. Have you thought about doing that? Yeah. You know what I mean? Robbie at Netflix has to hit me up. You know, he's like the guy. Yeah. Yeah, so.

I mean, you know. But you're still doing a lot of stand-up. Yeah, I still do a lot of stand-up. I was talking about editing earlier. So another thing that I'm editing, I'm editing that documentary series, which I'm happy about. But I'm also editing a documentary of my life. And I've been doing that for three years. Really?

It's fucking sick. Yeah? 60s, 70s, 80s, 90s. And I've got over 50 interviews. I got like Jeffrey Katzenberg and Rotenberg and Doug Herzog and Chris Rock, Mark Maron. I mean, everyone. Saget. Everyone has done it from ex-girlfriends to comics from the 70s.

Lenny Schultz did it. Crazy Lenny. Crazy Lenny. I saw Lenny Schultz in Montreal in like 1992. Like way back in the day. I saw him at the Comedy Works, the Montreal Comedy Festival. He was hilarious. Yeah, he was great. He was the original Gallagher. Yeah, was hilarious yeah he was great he was the

original Gallagher yeah in a lot of ways he was he was one of the original guys is he still around yeah he lives in Florida what does he do these days I think he's just retired just doesn't just yeah he used to work the main room he was as a comic growing up he was that's Billy Braver oh my god as a comic Lenny is the one right above Billy click on the one yeah right there that's Lenny so you know his joke right which one where he used to do the

he used to do the Lenny Schultz diet no do you know about that no where he would take all his clothes off and he would do this in the main room he would take all his clothes off and he would strip down to a Speedo. Right? To a Speedo.

And he would say, there's a lot of diets out there and people don't eat the food they're supposed to eat. He goes, on the Lenny Schultz diet, I put the food on my body of the places that I want to lose weight. Right? So he'd have these fucking pigs and these ducks behind him and he'd play the music. And he'd have all this food over there and he'd have spaghetti. And it would just like turn into this fucking crazy thing. And he'd pour fucking, he'd pour cottage cheese in his balls. And then he'd have like grapefruits.

He goes, if you want to lose some weight in your elbow, have the motherfucking grapefruits. And he'd throw the grapefruits. People have like, you're hearing this, they're not getting the, you have to, you have to lose some weight in your elbow, the motherfucking grapefruits. And you throw the grapefruits. People have, like, you're hearing this. They're not getting the, you have to see how manic and, like, psycho he was on stage. He got into it, you know. I mean, I would hate to be that type of comic, especially traveling. You know, that's why Carrot Top is stoked because he's just stuck in Vegas. Yeah.

I mean, imagine if you had to bring a case of stuff around uh you know well we're i was just talking to somebody about that recently those guys don't exist anymore like it used to be a genre it used to be prop comics but like carrot top there is yeah he was he was my favorite comic growing up as a kid. He was the original. Huge in Long Island. All the guys from Long Island loved him. They loved him. When I first moved there, I was like, who's Lenny Schultz? You never seen Crazy Lenny?

He would hold up a bear, the fucking Smokey the Bear. He would hold it up and he would go, only you can prevent forest fires. And he'd go, fuck you. And punch the bear. It didn't make any sense. But you would laugh your ass off. You'd be like, why am I laughing at this? I'm not sure why.

But he was so funny. There's a lot of comics out there that never made it that are really funny. I'm sure you heard of Ollie Joe Prater. Yeah, sure. No one knows who he is. He had the best, to me, he had the best strongest 45 minutes I've ever seen.

Wow. But he never changed it. Oh yeah. You know what I mean? That happened with a lot of those guys that never, you know, really got mainstream exposure. Like,

you know, like I remember I went to see Kennison after his HBO special and he hadn't quite figured out that you had to have all new material because the HBO special had come out, and people were yelling out bits while he was doing the bits. And it was that transitionary period because when the guys would do HBO specials, there was nothing like that before then where someone had did an hour on television.

Usually you would do a Tonight Show, you'd do like seven minutes, and then you would go perform. People actually probably wanted to hear those seven minutes again. You know who is the most, to me, the most prolific comic that always changed it up was George Carlin. Sure, every year. Yeah. He wrote a new hour every year.

Yeah. Every year. I think he had 14, right? 14 HBO specials? Yeah. Every year he wrote a whole new hour. I mean, that's fucking insane. Insane.

You know who else did it? Richard Jenney. Richard Jenney worked at Eastside Comedy Club in Long Island, and he did a different show Friday 8 o'clock show, a different show Friday 10 o'clock show, a different show Saturday 8 o'clock show, and a different show Saturday 10 o'clock show. All the comics were sitting around scratching their head. I remember I backstage so good i was an opener back then you know i was just starting out but i was backstage with all these guys who were like local headliners and they were just like fuck we're terrible they were like it was just confronted by how good he was

yeah he was a fucking gene i still to this day think that he's one of the most underrated comedians ever yeah ever yeah did you ever the thing that i noticed though because we had the same manager michael rotenberg was was my manager and jenny's manager at the time the one thing that i noticed about him though if you i don't know if you experienced this with him is that his stand-up in the clubs was fucking insane yeah for some reason when he was on tv doing it it didn't insane. But for some reason, when he was on TV doing it, it didn't translate as much. For some reason, I think the, you know how sometimes the camera just doesn't pick up you as funny as you are? Yeah.

That was kind of my experience with him. Because he was, you know, he killed himself. And I don't know if that was part of the reason. Because he was frustrated you know what i mean a lot of people i guess they kill themselves if you know things don't work out for them right yeah i mean like in their career i guess i don't know well he um he always wanted to be jim carrey that was his thing you know he wanted to be jim carrey he wanted to be the comic that transitioned from doing stand-up to these doing these gigantic movies and he had a show for a while on the platypus yeah and he did

actually did the mask with jim carrey he was in that movie he was great yeah it just didn't get a lot of roles didn't get a lot of parts but i i still maintain that a steaming pile of me if you're listening to this and you're thinking like let me let me go watch something. You can get it on iTunes. A Steaming Pile of Me is one of my all-time favorite stand-up specials. It's fucking great. Wow. A lot of it's relevant today. Wow.

Because it's 2007, but he does this thing about the difference between people on the left and people on the right and people in the middle. And it's fucking brilliant. It's brilliant. I got to hear that. And he was like a guy that I saw when I was starting out where I really realized watching him how important it is to really go in depth on a subject. Because he didn't just scratch the surface. Like when I was an open micer, one thing you see about open micers is they'll touch a subject and then they move on to a next subject. But they basically just scratch the surface of it. Jenny would dig a trench he would go deep and he would like get

Everything there was to get out of that bit and then he would move on to another subject and by the time he did you Were fucking howling and laughter and holding your sides, and yeah, he was it was amazing He was he was he was so good. He was yeah He and I agree with you, though. When you see him in the clubs, you really got to see what he's really all about. Yeah. That's really the problem with, like, specials, right? It's like trying to figure out how to translate what you do when it's a Friday night in the OR.

How do you get someone to experience that magic of, like, a perfect club set in, you know, a special. I think it's people's faces. I think it's comedians faces. Some just pop off of screen and some don't. That's my opinion. There's a little bit of that. Cause Richard had a weird face and he did it.

He had plastic surgery and there's a bunch of shit going on. Yeah. Yeah. I don't know. I like clubs too. In terms of like filming, because I filmed. There's a connection. There's a vibe. Yeah. Yeah. But I don't know. I like clubs, too, in terms of, like, filming. Because I filmed. There's a connection.

Yeah. There's a vibe. Yeah. Because when you do your stuff, you're here and the audience is back there. It's a little disconnect. If you're in a big theater, yeah. Big theater, yeah. There's good things about a big theater.

It's like you hear a huge roar. You get to see the place. And everybody's like, wow, Pauly Shore must be gigantic. Look at all these fucking people in the audience. But when you're at home, you're on a couch, and you're in front of the TV. It's very intimate. So you don't feel connected to this big, giant place.

That's why my Comedy Central special from 2014, Rocky Mountain High, I did in Denver at the Comedy Works. And the reason why I did it there, I was like, this is an intimate room. I want to have an intimate show. And if I'm here, this is an intimate room. I want to have an intimate show. And if I'm here, this is the place to do it. It's nice and tight. Let me ask you something.

At what point as a stand-up did you feel that you got really funny? Like you. Like you felt like, oh, shit, I feel like I'm really funny. You can't say at the beginning. No. It was more than 10 years in. Probably 10 years in, I felt like I was confident. But I feel like i'm better now than i've ever been before right but it's just work he's just constantly working at it like i feel like stand-up is one of the unique things that

require what you it requires like rigorous attention and detail and you have to be paying and you have to be enthusiastic and you have to be enthusiastic and you have to be disciplined like and it's almost contrary to what a lot of us are like a lot of us aren't disciplined people which is why we're funny in the first place because we're silly and we're impulsive and we laugh about things joke around about things and think about things in a fucked up way that's outside the box of normal thinking you know so I think that's a lot of times that sort of mindset is contrary to the mindset that's required to be disciplined, to write.

But as a kid, as a kid growing up, tell me about your parents. I was not funny. Yeah, that's what I was going to say. So do you have brothers and sisters? Yeah, I have a sister. And how old is she compared to you? She's a year younger. And then your parents, you grew up in the house all together?

Yeah. Like not divorced? Not my dad. No, we were divorced. My mom got divorced when I was like five. Okay. So that was like me, right? Did she have a lot of boyfriends?

No, no. She hooked up with my stepdad and they've been together ever since. My mom had a lot of boyfriends. Yeah, that's different. Yeah. Yeah. But anyways, you would walk in a room, Joe Rogan would walk in a room and you'd say something. Would they laugh?

Nobody thought it was funny. But, oh, so no one thought. I wasn't a funny person. So you weren't funny, right? You know how I got into comedy? It was making people laugh when we were doing martial arts because we were, like, going to fight in tournaments. So we'd all be nervous. And it was like I would be the one that made

everybody laugh like when we'd be on a bus to go to a tournament to fight for real do you talk about this not really i mean um maybe i've brought it up before but it's funny it's funny but it's funny just the scene of you on a bus with a bunch of kids fucking shooting the shit well one of them to this day i owe a tremendous debt of gratitude to my friend Steve Graham and my other friend Ed Shorter. They're the guys who talked me into it. If it wasn't for them. And Steve Graham is still a dear friend to this day.

So you were on the bus. You were going to your wrestling tournaments in Boston. It was kickboxing or taekwondo back then. In Boston? Yeah, in Boston. But you grew up right in Boston. I grew up in Newton, Newton Upper Falls, which is like a suburb of Boston. Is that like by Springfield, Mass?

No. Newton is like, it's right off of Route 9. So it's like Natick, like in that area. It's pretty close to Boston. You know, it's like not a far drive at all. And I would drive into town to train. My Taekwondo school was in boston wow and we would travel around the country we'd fly to places and compete you know it was like a giant

part of my life like karate chop shit like fucking taekwondo tournaments yeah that's insane yeah and so we were always nervous because you know guys get knocked out guys get kicked in the face it's terrible how old were you i started when i was 15 that's when i started so this is in high school yeah yeah yeah so you're driving to the things yeah so by the time i was 21 like i was like very successful at it i was a four-time state champion and i was competing constantly i won the u.s open i won a bunch of these like big tournaments like the bay state game did you ever go against black guys? Yeah. Was it scary? First time I did, I was nervous. I know.

That's what I'm saying. Fuck, right? Did you beat them? But the first black guy I fought, I knocked out. That was a huge alleviation of my worries. I assume. Right? Yeah.

After I watched the UFC stuff, and I watch you out there, and I'm like, when you first were doing it, there was no black guys. You know what I mean? I'm thinking, I'm just a guy watching at home. Like where's the fucking black guys? Cause they would kill everyone. And now all of a sudden there's black guys and they're like,

Oh shit. You know what I mean? Well, what's interesting in boxing, that was always the case, right? But now you're seeing Russians, like Gennady Golovkin,

you know, and like, I mean, it's really just a matter of the economic situation. Cause in the early days of the economic situation. Because in the early days of the 1900s, it was a lot of Jews. Because like Slapsy Maxy Rosenbaum, there was a bunch of Jewish fighters. Because, you know, there were Jewish immigrants and they faced a lot of hostility and poverty.

And this was a way out. And then it became Italians like Rocky Marciano, Rocky graziano there's a lot of italian boxers and then it became like puerto ricans and blacks and it's mostly it's a lot of it is disenfranchised people that are looking for some sort of an escape from it's also a financial thing as well it's like you know it's like kevin durant in a way i mean you know playing hoop and like you know right yeah i mean Yeah. I mean, that's their way out. It's their ticket out of poverty, you know? So you're seeing that with Russians now a lot, you know? So you're on the bus.

You're with your friends. You're joking around. I would do impressions of people, like do impressions of our friends having sex. Oh, that's hilarious. Just different things. So then one day they said you go to Comedy Connection in Boston? No, my friend Steve said, you know, you're funny. Like, you're really funny.

And I was like, look, I make you laugh because you're my friend. I'm like, other people are going to think I'm an asshole. Because especially in Boston, which is like a really conservative place, my sense of humor was very fucked up because these people were fighters, you know? So there was all these black belts

who were competing on a national level, traveling all around country like they were very intense people so you could say fucked up things to them to make them laugh like they there's there's their their borders their their boundaries were very different than the average person because they were experiencing such a like i assumed cops would be a lot like that too and maybe even soldiers cops i talked to like a lot of cops that i would train with too they had the most fucked up sense of humor hilarious they would be seeing gunshot wounds all the time and you know and there was you know there's a lot of jokes they would tell like as the guy was dead you know they would like be over the guy's body making jokes when no one was around and you

know people would think it's disrespectful but a lot of it is like the human brain is not supposed to experience that kind of stress that a cop or soldier experiences and gallows humor, as it were. You know, that's what a lot of them turn to for some sort of a relief. So what I did is I went to an open mic night and I watched. And this is actually a Richard Jenney quote. It's a great quote. And he's right. He said, one of the great things about terrible comedians is they inspire other people to try it.

Because you watch them and you go, well, this guy's fucking terrible. At least if I suck, I won't suck that bad. So my idea of stand-up is I would go to some place and I would see like Robin Williams and Richard Pryor and all these people that were just like gods. And I would be like, there's no way I'm going to be able to go up there and do that but when i went to an open mic night i realized like oh no these people it's just like being a white belt in martial arts like they're starting from the beginning and so that's why and this was that which club was it stitches stitches in boston in the 80s right 88 yeah august 27th 1988 that's funny started, my first one was September 25th, 1985. That was my first time.

Man, isn't it crazy to think back? Time just keeps moving on, Pauly. It's not cool. It's weird, right? It's definitely weird. Yeah, yeah. It never ends. It's not going to.

It keeps going after we're a family now yeah how many kids three wow i know is it nuts how come you how do you have no desire none whatsoever um yes yes yes but you got to find the right gal or guy guy you never know right right in this day and age I saw an article the other day it said transgender man gave birth to baby hilarious

and then Ben Shapiro retweeted it woman gave birth right yeah just I'm feeling it more now that I'm getting older

because at the bottom line is I don't want to well you know Larry King, Michael Douglas, Letterman, these guys have their kids in their late 60s.

Yeah, way late. That's not cool. Yeah. You know what I mean? Now you can still do it. You can do it if you get in right now. Right.

You got to find a gal. If there's anyone listening, just tweet their photos at Joe Rogan. Freeze your jizz. It's time to start freezing jizz. Yeah, exactly, right?

I should get Whitney Cummings pregnant. What do you think about that? You'd have to talk to her and see if that's something she'd be interested in. I would imagine she would not be interested in it. Right. Yeah. She wouldn't want my semen? You'd have to talk to her.

To be clear, I wouldn't want to decide for her. Or it could be Eliza. I think she's getting married. Yeah, but I could sneak it in before. Ooh, I don't want to decide for her. Or it could be Eliza. I think she's getting married. Yeah, but I could sneak it in before. Ooh, I don't know. Why would you want to get married to a comedian? I'm just kidding. I know you are.

But why would you want to get married to a comedian? No, I wouldn't. I wouldn't. I'm just kidding. Yeah. I don't know, man. It's like there's pros and cons. You know, like Ari's one of my best friends, and Ari travels the world, and he experiences

a life that's very... I mean, you know what Ari just did? Where he took three months off, actually four months, and just vanished. Didn't talk to anybody. Didn't bring a laptop. Yeah, he did the Chappelle thing. More than that, he went to Vietnam and Cambodia. No, not Cambodia. Thailand.

He went all over the place. But he did it by himself like with no one and just met people experienced things and just and no one knew who he was no one I mean a few people

recognized him and they took pictures of him and put him on Facebook and that's how we found out he was still alive but it was weird but he just decided

like hey I'm just gonna just have an adventure that's something obviously is out of the question when you have children you can't do that so there's

there's pros and I wouldn't want to's pros and that I wouldn't want to, that's not me. I wouldn't want to disappear for four months, no kids or kids. It's just like, I don't have that desire, but for him, but the desire to do an adventure,

to just go someplace for a couple of weeks is cool. But when you have kids, especially if you have little girls that wait for you and they, you know, you talk to them on the phone, they can't wait to see you. It's's a different world you know how old are you now i'm almost 50 i'll be 50 tomorrow oh my god oh my god happy birthday joe thank you that's amazing thank you very much fucking yeah are you doing a big 50th thing really oh no no i think birthday

parties are bullshit but it's like It's like, look at me. I went to a friend of mine's birthday party. It was his 50th birthday party. It was so annoying. They played a video. We had to watch a video. And it was like 20 minutes. And I was like, Jesus Christ, when is it over?

And then when it was over, his fucking family members and his friends got up and told stories with a microphone. And they held everybody captive with their shitty stories. It was death. It was death. I couldn't wait to get out of there you know what was funny is that i shouldn't play this video i have here that's hilarious i you know it was weird you know do you ever like sometimes like dream about things like when you think things and you like you have dreams yeah i knew i was coming in here today and i had a dream about you yeah and it was interesting i i had a dream that we you know we were doing our thing and it was cool. And I said, congratulations on your new show.

Your show has been on the air. And it was like, it was called the Rogans. And it was you and a camper with your, your wife and your kids going across America. It was like a family, like almost like, you know, almost like the Griswolds, but the Rogans. Like, but I know that that's something you would never do, but it was funny. family like almost like you know almost like the griswolds right but the rogans like yeah like but i know that that's something you would never do but it was funny it was hilarious it was like on the travel channel and it was like you guys fishing and eating and just how hilarious would it would be kind of hilarious but it's kind of gross too because like whenever i see people that

have their kids on these reality shows i'm, you're not even letting that kid choose. Right. You don't even give that kid a choice to be famous, like Honey Boo Boo or any of those fucking people. You're just putting your kid on TV before your kid even understands the consequences of it. I mean, at least when you got on television, you were in your 20s. You kind of were an adult. You kind of got it. I mean, it was young, and I'm sure it was weird to grow up in the spotlight

like that but at least you were a grown up yeah i understand you know when you see people that have their babies on tv and children on tv like what the fuck are you doing do you not know as a person who's on tv yeah that this could be like emotionally devastating just if they read the comments just if they went to you know uh instagram or youtube and read the comments like jesus christ you know yeah well look at child actors you know they're all messed up you know what i did did recently is a comic-con you know what that is yeah sure but you know that like you sign things it's hilarioushmm. It's hilarious. You did it? Yeah. So you sat down in one of those booths?

Yeah. It was like, I'd never done it. A friend of mine in San Antonio hooked me up with this agent. And they pay you, obviously. And you fly in. And there's basically Comic-Cons, as you know. It's all like people are dressed as Superman and Batman. But then there's the section with celebrities. So's a lot of like people from breaking bad there was a lot of

people from walking dead but then there was like rob schneider was in a booth you know what i mean val kilmer was in a booth wow and he's got like throat cancer val kilmer has throat cancer yeah dude it's fucking yeah it's not cool and then you got like Dolph Lundgren there. I didn't know Val Kilmer had throat cancer. That sucks. Oh, yeah. He's not old. No.

I mean, he's like 45 or something like that, isn't he? Yeah, he's young. Yeah. Fuck, man. Yeah, so it was just, it was a weird kind of experience. It was like awesome, and it was also not awesome. Dude, Val Kilmer is the shit. In Tombstone, what does it say?

Spotted with a breathing aid. Oh, wow. Yeah, it's terrible. Fuck, man. Yeah, it's a fucking, it's terrible. Well, he's had some crazy ups and downs with his weight to the point where you got to go like, look at those pictures of him on the far right. Look at those pictures.

Wow. Like, that was in the massive alcoholic days i mean there's nothing that does that to you like that other than massive eating and alcoholism that's so sad it's weird man people just abuse that shit out of their body like that what about Sizemore drug cancer what happened to him he was yeah look let's look at him

where's he at he was he's a friend of mine and I don't you know he's he had some drug issues yeah some drug issues

serious drug issues yeah he was like he was a great actor right fuck yeah fuck dude amazing yeah

I mean so many movies he's a savage yeah oh and I saw Michael Madsen there too oh yeah

yeah I know it was like oh my god it's a bummer well you have a good sense of humor about

the demise of your film career I've seen you joke around about it on stage about like you know trying to get TMZ

like hey pay attention to me man i'm over here yeah you have to yes yeah i think you have to yeah and the fact is i still have all my money yeah so i didn't like right you didn't go crazy no no i mean i still own my house i don't live in it i live in silver lake i have a apartment out there which i enjoy i like silver lake but um would i like to live in my big mansion up in the hill? I don't know. Would you rent it out?

Yeah, lease it out. That's smart. Yeah, lease it out. It's a good way to do it. Yeah, and I'm one person. Right. So, yeah, that was the one thing. You like living in Silver Lake?

I like it. It's pretty cool. What do you like about Silver Lake? I never understood Silver Lake. It's no one bugs you there. There's no tour buses. There's pretty cool. What do you like about Silver Lake? I never understood Silver Lake. It's, no one bugs you there. There's no tour buses. There's no billboards. There's no Starbucks.

There's none of that stuff. It's different than the Valley. Right. It's like all like really cool restaurants, really cool bars. It's all like craft stuff. Really nice people. People are very quiet. You know, you sit, you can write. It's very creative.

It reminds me of the East Village in New York. That's the vibe. Yeah. So if you ever go out to the East, it's like Los Feliz. I know Bill Burr lives in Los Feliz. And like that whole area, it's pretty cool. And the thing that I really like about it is the architecture there is still old Hollywood. Yeah.

You know, I love the old buildings. Like the building that I live in is like in the 1920s. So it's got that history and i love that you know i love that kind of that history like i don't like sunset now you know i drive by sunset i kind of like you know what i mean like the store and what the roxy and the rainbow are the only places left i know right isn't it weird when they like when they chop down the house of blues yeah it's weird the cool thing is the view now the view from the store is sick yeah but what they're probably going to do is build something bigger though they're going to

build a boutique hotel they're going to build a high rise what do you think about the store in the future of the store you're i mean you're thought about it it's never been doing better than it is now it's amazing how packed it is i mean it's sold out every night it's constant but what do you think about the building itself? In what way? Keeping it or not keeping it. It's a building. What else would you do? Well, I mean, I wouldn't do it, but I'm just saying if someone came in and offered a whole bunch of money to knock it down and build a hotel.

Dude. I mean, what would you think? Well, it would suck for comedy, for sure. But the laugh factory's probably not doing so hot. You'd probably take that motherfucker over. Take the laugh actio yeah it's like a move down the street but the room's not that that that great of a room no but you might be able to do something else well the thing is the comedy store is perfect that's part of the problem i mean it literally is perfect yeah i mean you have three different like wednesday night, I did the hat trick. I started out in the belly room,

or Tuesday night, I started out in the belly room, I did a set in the main room, and I did a set in the OR. You know, there's not a place in the country where you could do that, where you can perform

in front of 90 people, 400 people, and then 150 people. I mean, and every show was sold out, too. On a fucking Tuesday night, man. Tuesday night, three sold out shows in Hollywood, you know? And for me to work out my material, like, it's so invaluable, you know?

I like to do the Ice House. Like, I did the Ice House last night. Did, like, 35 minutes. And I did it with Andrew Santino and Tom Segura and Tom Papa and Frank Castillo. And, you know, it's just these killer lineups. And you get awesome shows. The people get to have a great time. You get to work out and fuck around.

And, like, these clubs around here are so critical. They're so important. If someone came along and bought the comic store, I mean, it would be the end of a giant era. It would be devastating. What do you think about it i think what my mom thinks is leave it alone yeah i wouldn't i would knock it down well who would be responsible who who who uh is in charge now well i'm not in charge right so is it peter peter yeah yeah yeah well the good thing is that the comedy store is making money now.

Mm-hmm. And a lot of money. It's doing really well. Yeah. Hopefully that's going to keep getting. Thanks to guys like you. Oh, my pleasure, man. Coming around for sure.

My pleasure. I hope it keeps coming. I mean, look, it's the most iconic comedy club in the history of the known universe. I agree. You know, it's my heart. You know what I mean? It's where I've been my whole life. I walk into that place every day.

Yeah. And I feel like I'm walking inside of my mom. You know what I mean? Yeah. You know what I mean? It's where I've been my whole life. I walk into that place every day and I feel like I'm walking inside of my mom. You know what I mean? Yeah. You know what I mean? Like I really feel like when I'm there, I feel her. Don't you? Oh yeah.

Oh yeah. And it's like, you know, the bar in the, uh, in the back, um, the back room, that bar, I took it from the Doheny house. Oh, that's right. Yeah. Yeah. Cause that bar was, was, uh, it was in my mom's house and that's the bar that Kenison and prior and everyone got fucked up on. And when we were,

we sold the house and we were, I was cleaning it out. You know, that's one of the things in the doc series is I'm like, keep this bar. Yeah. Cause it's great. And then I had Juan Carlos pick it up and we brought it over to you know to eric in the back back room and we saved it for you guys that's amazing i did that you know so the comics can have that feeling yeah you know of like because that bar the doheny house was is as iconic as the comedy store yeah you know because that's the house that was like the comedy mansion well you know that's crest crest hill no no the the comedy mansion. Well, you know, that's Crest Hill, right? No, no.

The Doheny house from my mom. See, I never went to that, but I almost bought Crest Hill. Okay. You know, when Crest Hill was for sale a few years back, I went to look at it. I was going to buy it. That would have been perfect for you. Yeah, but. The vibe.

It was just. I lived there for a while. I couldn't commit to living right there. Yeah. I was like, this is just too derelict. Like, I've always been the guy who likes to live away from stuff and then come in and then get some quiet and peace. I'm like, this might be too much to be right above the comedy store. I might be like, I might burn out.

You know what I mean? You know what I'm saying? But that room, it's interesting because that back bar is a new place, but it doesn't feel like a new place. It feels like probably because of that bar and also because it's in the store. But it's also the old video room. Right. That's where my mom did.

It was like the comedy channel. That's where she kept all her old videos. So it feels like, you know, that. That bar is amazing. That vibe, yeah. It's the coolest place. You go back there and Ron White will be back there holding court. Except when D'Elia's there throwing his hair around. That doesn't work you know, that. That bar is amazing. That vibe. Yeah. It's the coolest place. You go back there. Ron White will be back there holding court. He's there throwing his hair around.

That doesn't work for me, bro. You know what I mean? That's not cool, bro. D'Elia's hilarious. He is. Hey, man. What's going on, man? He's hilarious.

He is hilarious. I mean, it's a great crew there now. I mean, there's so many funny comics there. It's really an amazing time. Yeah. It's also like a lot of people like you know for me because I've seen the decades of it there's still nothing like the Kennison in the prior days you know like I watch everyone in the back and I'm like

they're killing but for some reason it just doesn't feel like I felt when I was one of the reasons why because back then and there would never been anything like that you know I mean you think about Pryor. Before Pryor came around, who the fuck was like Pryor? No one. You know, and Kenneson. Kenneson was a completely unique kind of talent. There had never been anybody like him before.

And so now you've seen so much since then. There'll never be that uniquely innocent time where people are like, Jesus. Yeah, but, you know, to respond to the the prior thing when he would because i saw him for years develop his show there at the store when he would walk on stage and they would say ladies and gentlemen richard prior it was like fucking jesus it was like yeah people like literally like would stand up and be like, no way. Fuck. Huh? Huh? It was like that type of shit. Like Elvis. Yeah.

Like that type of shit. So, so I saw that and, and there was something so obviously, well, he was just so funny, dude. You know what I mean? Like even if his material wasn't funny that night, he was just funny. He's a genius. Yeah. Like a real comedy genius.

And, you know, probably one of the most influential stand-up comedians ever him and kinnison i think kinnison i mean i think obviously prior was before him and kinnison learned a lot from prior yeah but kinnison was very groundbreaking in a lot of ways like there's never been anybody like him well yeah and it's also before sam got into the you know too much of the drugs like that he had that five-year run which was fucking insane yeah and i know i was on that run too with him i was like opening for him for a while on the road. And then, like, he started getting, you know what I mean? He started going off the deep end.

Yeah, nobody can sustain that, especially, I mean, did you ever read his brother's book, Brother Sam? I didn't read, no, I didn't read it. It's a great book. Yeah. And in it, his brother sort of talks about how Sam just kind of stopped writing because he was partying all the time. And his material suffered. And you could really feel the difference and nobody could live that rock and roll crazy drug life and still be an awesome creative force. Like creativity demands your attention.

Yeah. His, I mean, I got so many stories with this. It's fucking insane. But the, his Rodney Dangerfield young comedian specials were like fucking... Yeah. The second one was just as good as the first one. Yep. You know, the first spot.

He was a fucking genius. Dude, I got to get out of here, unfortunately. No, it's all good. I had to squeeze this in today to get you on, but I wanted everybody to know about it. And so tell people where they can see this on Funny or Die. Yeah, just go to Funny or Die. Check out the Stephen Miller clip. Also, Crackle, my show on Crackle.

And I'll be coming out with some documentary stuff. And Pauly Shore Stands Alone is on Amazon right now if you haven't seen that. And Pauly Shore on Twitter. Which is Pauly Shore. Instagram. Instagram, Pauly Shore, Snap, Pauly Shore. And MySpace, Corey Feldman. All right, brother.

I'll see you at the store. Thank you. Thank you. Pauly Shore, ladies and gentlemen.