The Joe Rogan Experience - JRE MMA Show #16 with Brendan Schaub

Episode Date: March 6, 2018

Joe is joined by Brendan Schaub to discuss this past weekend's fights. Also check out his new show "Below The Belt with Brendan Schaub" on SHOwtime. ...

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 They get me all the time. I'm more famous than them. Aye, aye. I wish we could tell you what we were talking about, but we can't. Yeah, we were talking about Joey getting in trouble, though. He just texted me about it. How's Joey Diaz getting in trouble with what, the MMA community? MMA outlets?
Starting point is 00:00:22 They have nothing to do? Well, here's the thing, though. I see where they're coming from. They're journalists. If someone says something that fucking outrageous about what Mackenzie Dern's derriere must...
Starting point is 00:00:37 I think your ass smells great right now. You're talking about the comic Uncle Joey said this? Yes, the comic Uncle Joey. But I get it. I get where they would, and then Vinny Magalhaes backed him up. I get it. Backed up Joey?
Starting point is 00:00:52 Yeah, he backed up Joey. He said something like, and tasty too. Yikes. Yeah. Yikes. I get it. I don't get it. That's Joey Diaz, the great comic who's commenting on a hot girl in the UFC. He is not a writer.
Starting point is 00:01:05 He's not a journalist. These writers have nothing to do to do so they're like how can we get hits let's talk about joey diaz right because no one's reading any of our shit i agree with you in somewhat but he definitely did do it like it ain't a bad here's my thing they could say whatever they want about what he said but if he was your friend and he texted you that, you would do what I did. Look, because I'll show you. He fucking texted me that before he tweeted it. Of course. I love that Joey texts now.
Starting point is 00:01:37 Joey never would text message. Oh, I hope he doesn't keep texting. Joey Diaz is a full-on texter now. Is he? Yeah, yeah. He still calls, though. He called me last week. Most of the time he calls, but he texted me.
Starting point is 00:01:51 Yeah. It's Joey Diaz, man. Let's see. Sorry, folks. I wish I could let you in. You can go Google what he said. I'm trying to be respectful. It's Joey Diaz.
Starting point is 00:02:07 He can say whatever he wants. He doesn't work for the UFC. He's not at Ken's adjournment. You're right. I'm glad he does. I'm glad he does think like that. I'm glad he does send me texts like that. But if I was a news website and I was going to report on things.
Starting point is 00:02:20 First of all, anybody who reads. Yeah. You want clicks. For sure. That's what they want. But also, anybody who reads that, you're either going to be like me or you're going to start laughing or you're going to get really upset. Really upset.
Starting point is 00:02:35 And then you're not a Joey Diaz fan anyway. It doesn't matter. If you read that, 95% of that is dudes reading it are like, that's hilarious. Yeah, 95%. The other 5% are like, what the hell? What are we doing? How could you report this? Yeah, I think that's a good number.
Starting point is 00:02:51 95. 95% of dudes are like, that's hilarious. I was wondering the same thing. Some women will get upset, though. And rightly so. Oh, no. Just imagine if you were a dude and there was some big old giant Alexander Carellon looking dude who wanted to fuck you. And he was always making jokes about what your butthole must smell like.
Starting point is 00:03:14 Just stop. Just stop and think what that would feel like. That wouldn't be a good time. If you're McKenzie? If you're anybody that someone is saying those things about, right? I'm just trying to be open-minded. You're being super open-minded. You kind of are.
Starting point is 00:03:29 If you turn social justice, I'm fucking out. I can't. It's not possible. I feel sick. But what I'm saying is, if you look at it from the position of the person, the person whose butthole is in question, that would be an uncomfortable position to be in right a bunch of people talking about what your butthole smelled like you're just trying to make a living on tv
Starting point is 00:03:49 just trying to make a living just trying to choke a girl you know what that is it's it's also joey diaz being complimentary you know it'd be one thing if she was not an attractive female or something like that she's obviously very, which is what makes this funny. I agree, 100%. I agree. Now if he tweets out, I wonder what black beast asshole smells like, something like that, to fully redeem himself. That's funny too.
Starting point is 00:04:15 I don't know. He might. He might. Yeah, I don't know if he can get away with that. He might just throw it up there to give those Cheeto fingers something to write about. Joey's coming on with Yo Al Romero. I cannot wait for that. It's going to be a complete...
Starting point is 00:04:29 That's the craziest podcast ever. They're going to talk in Cuban, I mean Spanish obviously, then go back and forth, translate for you. English and whatever he can't get, Joey's going to help him out with. If I talk too fast or if I say something he doesn't understand, Joey's going to jump in. Then they're going to go, It's going to be awesome. It could be awesome or a complete shit joke.
Starting point is 00:04:53 It's going to be amazing. Yeah, it's going to be awesome. With you and Joey, anyone. Joey, he's a great entertainer. People don't understand. Part of the reason why he's so funny is he knows what's entertaining for you. He knows how to be the life of the party like no one. Callan's pretty goddamn good at it too.
Starting point is 00:05:09 Callan's up there. Callan can entertain a room. Callan can take over a room and bring the party. Some of the best stuff. I think that's his best art form, honestly. Me too. I've told him that. I think that your best art form is like inappropriate comedy around people who are trapped.
Starting point is 00:05:23 Correct. Who are stuck at a party. You're at a plane with him or something and he can't go anywhere he's the funniest person he's made me laugh harder off stage than than almost anybody it's so ridiculous right there he's right up there off stage with joey but on stage joey's just he's on different animals especially right now he's on another planet. Especially right now, he's on another planet. Look, Callan's fucking hilarious on stage, too, but Joey right now. Jesus Christ. Yeah, Callan just did his, like, his showcase at the improv. How'd that go?
Starting point is 00:05:54 You know, Callan, I murdered, murdered. He was murdered. Got killed. Well, that's good. But I've been hearing good things. That's good. Yeah. That club is not a bad club to work at now.
Starting point is 00:06:05 I wish they would get rid of that stupid fucking piano on stage, though. That doesn't make any sense to me. The piano's weird, and Brian makes the same joke about it every time. It's hilarious. Does he? Yeah. I won't say what it is. There's a part where you're standing, especially if you go anywhere back on the stage, where
Starting point is 00:06:20 the people that are on the right side of the stage, like if you're facing the audience, you're right. Those people can't see shit. They can't see, and there's not a lot of room it's stupid it's strange it's stupid do they use it for anything though does anyone get on there it's i don't know man we should have a carrot top or some well i know craig robinson does on occasion he brings his own though does he yeah usually has his electric piano doesn't he maybe owen benjamin owen benjamin could play fuck out of a piano. But listen, the moral of the story is no one's really using that. He even has a, is it like Huge Pianist was like a website that he had or something?
Starting point is 00:06:55 Because he's a giant dude. No one is using that fucking thing. Get rid of it. Get rid of it. Owen doesn't need it. Like most places don't need a goddamn piano. That's so old school. But it's just in the way.
Starting point is 00:07:05 It's a hindrance. It's taking away from the show. I really believe it takes away from the show. Can you name any other club with a piano on stage? Not really. It's hard to think. It's just a stupid thing to have. But also, look what the comedy store is doing.
Starting point is 00:07:20 And then do that. Craig Robinson with his own fucking keyboard. You're right. Yeah, he usually comes out with his own shit. Yeah, he's probably got a bunch of shit hooked up on that thing, right?
Starting point is 00:07:28 Look at him. I bet he DJs the fuck out of a party. He does look like a mean DJ. He does. Right? You know who else
Starting point is 00:07:36 DJs? It's Shaq. You ever seen Shaq like straight up DJing? His giant ass is a DJ. Yeah, that's what he does like in his off time.
Starting point is 00:07:43 He's got platinum records. Multiple. Being a DJ? As a rapper. Yeah. That's what he does in his off time. He's got platinum records. Multiple. Being a DJ? As a rapper. No. That Diesel CD went platinum? Yeah. He's got two.
Starting point is 00:07:50 I have one of them. That's embarrassing. That's embarrassing. It's tough. I saw some video of him DJing, and it's like thousands of people, like kids just jamming out. Obviously high off their ass on XC, but it looked like a good time. That's what he does.
Starting point is 00:08:11 Why not, man? Why not so Peters is legit DJ legit really like legit? Friends with all the old-school rappers like Big Daddy Kane and shit. I had no idea. Yeah, dude Russell is Seriously legit like when we had him on the podcast a long time ago. He actually Look at the size of Shaq towering over that fucking equipment. The biggest DJ in the world. He's so big. He's so crazy. But Russell doesn't like those other guys calling themselves DJs.
Starting point is 00:08:35 Those like Tiesto guys. Really? Yeah. He says that's not a DJ. He's like a DJ is someone who knows how to play records. These guys are like pressing play on their laptop and bouncing around with their hands up in the air. I mean, I think there's more to it,
Starting point is 00:08:47 but I agree. You're kind of just hitting a playlist and doing your thing. It's a different thing. I think there's more to that. It's a different thing, but to those people that want to hear that different thing,
Starting point is 00:08:55 those are the masters. It's like, I just think it's silly to get hung up on one art form or another because in any art form, you're going to have, there's Russell tearing it up.
Starting point is 00:09:06 See, he actually knows how to mix and scratch and all that shit. He's a talented dude. He's a smart dude. Russell's a very smart dude. Very smart. Very good dude, too. Like one of the nicest people I think I've ever met. Like a super, super fucking sweetheart.
Starting point is 00:09:20 First man to roast me on stage and it hurt my feelings. But then that was the way of just kind of initiation. Yeah. A little ball busting. a little busting of the balls he's just i love him yeah he's a sweetheart but um he's like super passionate about old school djing like with record players and shit like he's really good at that and there's an there is an art to that yeah but that's why he hates on these new guys like dj tiesto and well he doesn't hate on them he doesn't hate on them he just doesn't think that they should call themselves djs because he's like dj's a disc jockey you know they're like a new age disc jockey though but they're not a disc they don't have a disc he's got a disc and that's part of his art he's moving that disc i see his point i see his point is, like, I just think
Starting point is 00:10:05 people love that kind of music, obviously. Like that Calvin Harris shit. Hell yeah. And I'm not saying shit in a bad way. It's just a way of describing it. But as you're driving down the road in Vegas, man, you see these big ass Calvin Harris posters and shit. Yeah, Diplo. Huge, man. All those electronic
Starting point is 00:10:22 guys. I mean, obviously people love that sound. So I don't think he's saying that they suck. I just think he's saying it's a different thing. Different. Yeah. Because, like, obviously, if you wanted to hear that shit and you went there and Russell was scratching records, you'd be like, come on. Come on, bro.
Starting point is 00:10:37 I'm here to do ecstasy and listen to. What are you doing? Yeah. Let the bass drop. Yeah. You know, disc jockey, a person who introduces and plays recorded popular music, especially on radio or at a disco. They're electric DJ jockeys. Maybe time to update that fucking.
Starting point is 00:10:58 Yeah, that's super old school. What the fuck is a disco? At a disco? A disco? How about a ballroom? The thing about those DJs, like Steve Aoki had a documentary on Netflix
Starting point is 00:11:08 which is ridiculous, but because they're not like live performing, they can do more shows than anyone. So like Steve Aoki was on the road 300 days out of the year
Starting point is 00:11:16 and made something like $300 jigillion. Private jet. He's going from Amsterdam to China. Yeah, just nonstop. Yeah. That's all you do. He was at the Onnit Lab.
Starting point is 00:11:27 I know, I saw that. He was the guy who was throwing cakes in people's faces, mainly girls. He'd toss cakes. That was his thing. And then he hit one girl and her neck was like, I think he had a lawsuit so he stopped throwing the cake in their face. Yeah, don't throw cakes. It was awesome. People would ask for it
Starting point is 00:11:43 though. This is what you'd do? Boom. Is that the girl that got hurt? No, I don't know. Some girl got whiplashed, though. So he would throw a cake. Oh, my God.
Starting point is 00:11:56 With a piece of cardboard underneath it? Is that his move? That's just the bottom of the cake. You know what I'm saying? You got to put it on something. That seems... Suhoki longs cake throw, hits guy in a wheelchair. Well, that's not fun.
Starting point is 00:12:06 Oh, let's not watch this. I don't want to watch the guy in the wheelchair get hit in the head. He's all, yeah, oh my God. Maybe it's an honor, right? No, it is. If you're a fan of Steve Aoki, it's like, hit me with the cake. Right. Like if you're at the WWE and someone spits on you.
Starting point is 00:12:20 There's a little bit of blood or some shit. Someone just... Oh, yes. They catch that conversation spit or in the nba that when they throw their mouthpiece people catch them it's disgusting happens mma too what are you gonna do with that thing i've seen that yeah why do people throw them in the audience i don't know it's so disgusting so preposterous what is this jamie what is it oh you said blood spitting blood this is the guy lifting at the the Arnold thing. He needs to see a doctor.
Starting point is 00:12:47 So his nose started spraying blood right in the middle of his lift. Yeah. Whoa, that's rough. They didn't clean up everything. They take a little break. You need to see a doctor, sir. Eh, he's fine. Got the lift up.
Starting point is 00:12:58 Got a little stomach thing going on. That's internal bleeding. He's got a little, nah, it's probably a nasal infection. You think? Eh. Bursting out like, nah, it's probably a nasal infection. You think? Eh. Bursting out like that? Walk it off. Can't be good.
Starting point is 00:13:08 That guy just deadlifted 1,000 pounds. Looks pretty healthy to me. How much did he deadlift? He's going to live a long time. 9.39 it says. Jesus Christ, that's so much weight. That's a lot of weight. That's so much weight.
Starting point is 00:13:18 I saw a crazy one where a dude was doing this squat, and the bar couldn't handle the weight, and the bar bent, and he couldn't handle the weight and the bar bent and he couldn't get it back onto the rack. And so he had to like kind of dive out from under it, but he was squatting a shitload of weight. Obviously imagine having that kind of weight on you and you got to figure out how to get it off you without hurting you. Yeah. Have you seen homeboy when they do the heavy squats and they blow their asshole out? Oh, I did see that. That's a tough one. Yeah. I thought you were going to bring up that guy who was doing something in one of those CrossFit games.
Starting point is 00:13:52 And he was doing like a clean and his arms gave out and it dropped down on his neck and paralyzed him. Damn. No, I was keeping it positive. It's a friend of Tate's. Yeah. Landed on his neck. Mm-hmm. Out. Dead. Just fell down. Body stopped moving. of Tate's. Landed on his neck. Out, dead.
Starting point is 00:14:06 Just fell down, body stopped moving. No, he's paralyzed from the neck down. Just boom. Like everything just shut off. It landed on his neck. Probably passed on the CrossFit from there on out. Well, you know what? Some of these guys are almost too fucking tough for their own good with something like that,
Starting point is 00:14:20 where you're holding something over your head. Doing a thousand reps or whatever the hell they do. Yeah, they're just trying to smash everybody's reps and show how badass they are which is you know it's competition Steve Maxwell hates that shit he says that and I see other people's points too that it's beneficial that the competition makes you work harder but Maxwell's take on it is those type of exercise movements like power cleans and things like that they They're not meant for that high reps, though, are you saying? They're not meant for high reps. No, I agree with him.
Starting point is 00:14:47 Yeah. He's like, those are strength moves. They're meant for low reps, couple sets, you know, heavy shit. 100%. That's not something. Your body shouldn't be doing that, and the things that can go wrong are really going to fuck you up. Especially when you start going tons and you're losing your technique and your form. That's dangerous shit, man.
Starting point is 00:15:03 Yeah, you lose. And this guy was out of position, too. I mean, his body was paralyzed. Damn, paralyzed. Tate's boy? Yeah, Tate knows him. Tate's big in that. He's deep in that CrossFit world.
Starting point is 00:15:14 He knows a lot of those CrossFit people. He has Venice Barbell Club. What's his thing over there? He does something off Lincoln in Venice. He's always there. They have some strongman shit. There's capes everywhere. I know what you're talking about.
Starting point is 00:15:26 The name escapes me. God, me too. The Box? No. That's not it? The Box in Venice? No. Whatever.
Starting point is 00:15:34 Callum works at Venice Barbell Club. Tate's always been in there. Tate's somewhere else, though. That kind of working out. Is it Deuces? Way back in the day. Is it Deuces? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:15:44 Deuces. Deuces. There you go. Shout out to Deuces. Man deuces? Yeah. Deuce. There you go. Shout out to deuces. Man, what's up, deuce? Yeah, Tate's always been into kettlebells and, you know, muscle-ups and shit like that. Just cool. Crossfit-style movements and he's a big fan of Crossfit. He loves it.
Starting point is 00:15:56 Have you done a ton of Crossfit? No. I mean, I do those kind of exercises, right? I do a lot of kettlebell stuff. I do deadlifts. I do a kind of exercises, right? I do a lot of kettlebell stuff. I do deadlifts. I do a lot of things. Like circuit training, but not.
Starting point is 00:16:08 Yeah, but I don't do it the way they do it. No, me neither. I do that Pavel Tatsalini method where you're doing like sets of five, never more than sets of five. Yeah, I dig that. And I take a lot of time off in between sets. My schedule has been so crazy, man. I haven't been able to go to the gym like
Starting point is 00:16:26 I typically do. You know where I work with my trainer and I'll do weights, I'll do stuff like that. So I've been trying to find some alternatives. Yeah, man. It's fun to mix shit up. I've been bored. Do something different. Yeah, I've been bored. Take a yoga class. I've been doing yoga. I've been doing hot yoga, which I love. Fucking taekwondo,
Starting point is 00:16:42 bro. How about that? You want to go deep? Hi-yah! Double knife hand block. want to go deep? Hi-ya! Double knife hand block. Want to go deep? After post-UFC career, front kicking motherfuckers. Want to go deep? It's a good workout, though. I'll hard pass on that, man.
Starting point is 00:16:57 I don't want anything to do with martial arts. But here's the thing. You like some sort of McDojo style Taekwondo. As long as they teach you good technique, you're going to get a good workout in. I'm trying to burn some calories. You'll get a good workout in doing those wheel kicks and shit. Hard pass for me. Hard pass, Joe. What about Aikido?
Starting point is 00:17:16 Just for a goof. Just you with the pajamas. Just wrist locking motherfuckers. Flipping them. Grabbing that wrist. Woo! You fly. You fly.
Starting point is 00:17:27 You fly into the ground with magic. Woo! That'd be sick. Woo! Means the goal, doing a thing. Imagine, ah, the wrist makes you do cartwheels. Oh, God. I go full deep on that.
Starting point is 00:17:37 No, it'd be fun if you did it and you did one of them Aikido demonstrations. You show what happens when someone doesn't just give in. Seriously. You'd be like, you know, He goes and grabs you and does this. You push him away from you. Fuck off. What is this? What are you doing?
Starting point is 00:17:52 They try to throw you and you just kind of push their head down. I love that. Come on, man. Come on, bro. Stop. Stop. You don't try to counter him. You just cut the shit.
Starting point is 00:18:00 Stop. Just cut the shit. This is fake. This is the worst promo ever for him. This is not working. Ah! Ooh! Cut just cut the shot just get this. This is fake. You're not worse promo. This is not working You have to like throw yourself at them, it's all bullshit But apparently man those dudes who were badass at it back in the day It was about getting rid of swords guy comes at you with a fucking sword and they're all
Starting point is 00:18:20 They had to learn how to like the guys lunging at you literally with a ridiculous movement. Cause he's trying to just chop you up. Right. So it would be similar to how these guys move and throw those. Yeah. And those demonstration videos, but that shit's not applicable. If a guy doesn't have a sword,
Starting point is 00:18:35 that's an old school too. It's just fucking. I was thinking about doing, this isn't a sponsor or anything like that. I was looking at those. Cause you have one in the back. They're one of those penalty, what Peloton bikes.
Starting point is 00:18:44 Yeah. So I can work out, just wake up and do that. And then do my thing. Those are great at those because you have one in the back. They're one of those Peloton bikes. Yeah. So I can work out. Peloton bikes. So I just wake up and do that and then do my thing. Those are great. You think? They have a whole thing.
Starting point is 00:18:50 You do a bunch of different workouts. You can go online. There's like online classes. This is a sponsor. You do live. Yeah. You do it live too. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:18:56 But you know what I like better? I like the Rogue bike, that fucking assault bike. What is it called? The Echo. The Aerodyne? Yeah. Jesus Christ.
Starting point is 00:19:04 They made a beefed up version of one i have one here yeah i do tabatas on it 20 seconds on 10 seconds off holy shit dude if i get the the pedalton bike that rogue thing in a in a or the aerodyne and like a rower i'd be straight yeah the rower's bad i got a rower too rower's badass too i do 30 and 30 with the rower so 30 minutes of sprinting rower. So 30 minutes of sprinting, 30 minutes of rest, 30 minutes of sprinting, 30 minutes of rest. 30 minutes? Excuse me. Seconds.
Starting point is 00:19:30 I was like, Jesus Christ, Joe. What are you on, sir? Can you imagine if you could just sprint for 30 minutes? I was like, what the fuck? What kind of a Viking are you? Excuse me. 30 seconds. So the Tabata is 20-10, and then I go from, I do like um it'll do eight rounds of 2010 and then i go over
Starting point is 00:19:47 and do the row machine and i'll do eight rounds of 30 30 30 seconds on 30 seconds off and then i go back and do it again and then i do it again and if i've got the stones if i got the stones i could do three sets exhausted i've only done three sets once and i had to double up on the shroom tag you felt sick i was beat down, man. You're just really exhausted at the end of it. But it's also short, and your body's super intense at the time. Most people think that's the best workout you can do. It does something to you.
Starting point is 00:20:15 I guarantee you. Because one of the things, after doing it like three or four times, I started to feel it in my running. It's because I'm running a lot, too, though. But my endurance in running is getting better. And I think maybe some of that might have to do with the biking. Because the bike works out different muscles, too, man. Your lungs, too.
Starting point is 00:20:35 Yeah. When it has to adapt to that kind of capacity, moving like that. That's not it. That's the beefy one? I will break that shit, Jamie. That's not it, Jamie. It's called the Rogue Echo. Echo Air or some
Starting point is 00:20:45 shit i've been doing uh the thousand meter test on the row like i'll get done hitting bits of my train then i go 8 000 meters i see they have the records for the week right i try and beat the records and just so anybody knows that's not a sneaky ad i paid for all the rogue stuff that's here i bought it all no no i just think it's good that's it right god the thing is beefy beefy as fuck it's got girders and shit you got a fat ass dog. The thing is beefy. Beefy as fuck. It's got girders and shit. You got a fat ass handle on a girder. Yeah, I need to step my game up so I don't have to leave to the gym to save time.
Starting point is 00:21:14 Dude, it's nice to be able to just do it in your house. All you need is a chin-up bar and some kettlebells at home and you could just get something done. Yep, that's what I need. Because sometimes, you know that thing where you have an hour before you have to leave. You're like, I might be able to get to the gym and squeeze 30 minutes in. See, that's what I've been doing. Yeah. Because I like to wake up with my son, and I'm like, I'm with him. And I'm with him an hour, and then I'm going to be at the studio here.
Starting point is 00:21:33 I'm going to New York. I'm doing this. I just wanted to do something at home. Dude, I've become addicted to the fasted cardio. I used to do that before I started throwing up. Yeah, but I think that's your coffee intake. Yeah, you're probably right. You talk your coffee intake. What are you're probably right. You talk your coffee intake.
Starting point is 00:21:46 What are you, like 20 cups a day or something? I was at 12 to 16 cups a day. And then fasting until 2. The doctor's like, well, let's not do that, you moron. That's so crazy. That's so much whatever. It's so much caffeine. It's just too much of anything.
Starting point is 00:21:58 It's too much of everything. And if you're not having any food, then it's just getting straight in there. It's all getting absorbed. I'm on all these medications now. I have to get keto really i'm dying joe i have stage one diabetes what is the medications they put you on i don't it's some anti-acid like super strong stuff so i can still drink my coffee it's just not a possibility you just have to keep coffee yes i have to i was like you will you will fuck up my entire workflow if i can't drink coffee that's so
Starting point is 00:22:23 crazy yeah but fasting cardio is the way to go yeah i love it man i get addicted to it you know You will fuck up my entire workflow if I can't drink coffee. That's so crazy. Yeah. But fasting cardio is the way to go. Yeah, I love it, man. I get addicted to it. You know what I get addicted to? I get addicted to the feeling of having done it when I didn't want to do it. That's what I realized this running thing is for me. It's this little game I'm playing with my brain where I know I'm going to do it, but I wake up and I'm like, oh.
Starting point is 00:22:42 And then Marshall's barking. I'll put him in the backyard he's like come on bitch he wants to go dude he's so crazy now because we've been doing it so much so he's in really good shape that fucking dog's in shape like that dog's getting shaped like that yes he was getting a little chubby you know but he was only like he still had baby fat on him he's only 14 months old so when i took took him, he was like 9 or 10 months old when I first started taking him. I just wasn't sure if he was going to listen
Starting point is 00:23:09 or I was worried, like, what if we run into a rattlesnake or something like that. That would suck. It sucks. He got used to the routine. You could get them to the hospital, though. They survive. They're a lot tougher than us. You gotta suck it out, especially if you hit them on the nose. You gotta suck it out. That's not real. That's what I've heard, bro. I've heard it, too. It's not real. It's so fake, right? Yeah, I just read it. It's bro science. It doesn't work. You can't really suck it out. Dogs die because it hits them on the nose you gotta suck it out that's not real that's what i've heard bro i've heard it too it's not real it's so fake right yeah it's bro science it doesn't work but if you can't really suck it
Starting point is 00:23:27 out dogs die because it hits them on the nose and so you know it gets spread that's what i've heard no my dogs have been on the nose your dog has yeah my pit by rattlesnake yeah did he die no he's still alive no he's dead now it was a long time ago what are we doing it's a long time ago i all my dogs got bit by rattlesnakes. Except the killer. Except Squeaky Fromm. She didn't give a fuck about snakes. She would just fuck up other dogs. That was my prison dog.
Starting point is 00:23:53 That was the dog that I got from the pound. It was in the pound. It was from Callan. On Callan's suggestion. It was in the LA Animal Shelter for like five or six months. It was a sweet, sweet dog though. Loved people. It was a sweet, sweet dog, though. Just had issues, though. Loved people. Did not want any dogs ruining her newfound party.
Starting point is 00:24:10 Dog aggression. Well, she lived for the formative months of her childhood before I got her. She lived in a cage. And I think that that fucks with a dog's head. Nobody adopted her for, like, I think it was at least five or six months. Poor bunny. And then once you finally do get adopted and you get all this love from these people, you get to sleep in bed with them and shit, and they take you home.
Starting point is 00:24:33 I mean, that dog was, she slept right by my bed. Sometimes they would hop in the bed, but I'd have to kick them off because they fart and shit. Yeah, see, I like them in the bed. It's rough. I like the dogs in the bed. Keep it warm. It does keep it warm, but sometimes they fart and it's brutal. You're like, oh, Jesus.
Starting point is 00:24:46 Or if it's a hot summer night, it's like, get out of here, man. I know. Itchy and shit. But so like any dog that she thought might steal that from her, like any dog that came in right near, she would growl at dogs if you pet them. She just was not into it. Insecurity issues. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:25:04 There's good and bad. But you guys are running all the time together. I've struggled with that a little bit lately where I'll be tired, and I'm like, come on, you've got to work out. I've never had a workout and then afterwards went, man, I wish I didn't do that. Yeah. Never, not once. People are saying this.
Starting point is 00:25:17 People need to understand. I saw a couple of comments of people saying this is terrible advice and you should listen to your body when your body's tired. Oh, shut up. That's not right. No. No. If you're sick, it're not no i know when i'm tired yeah i know when i need to rest and i also can i know like how when i've done too much stuff like i've done like two works out two workouts a days three days in a row before and then you get to that fourth day and you're like whoa all right i probably should do nothing today which is that's even that's almost tougher to do
Starting point is 00:25:44 than working out for me to take a day. That's almost tougher to do than working out. For me to take a day off is almost tougher. Psychologically. Yes. Because I'm like, oh, that's not good, man. Don't be a pussy. You get momentum. Right now it's going good, right?
Starting point is 00:25:53 Your body starts thinking it's going to go. But there's a moment where you realize that you're probably – I should really monitor my resting heart rate in the morning. That's another thing Steve Maxwell taught me. He said that that's one of the best ways to figure out if you're over-trained. When you wake up in the morning, if your heart rate is 5 to 10 beats over what it normally is,
Starting point is 00:26:12 don't do shit because you're fighting something off. Either you're fighting something off or you need to recover. You could do like light skill work. They say if you're sick, working out makes it worse because it messes up your immune system. Yeah, it messes up your immune system. But usually I know if I'm being lazy, I'm like, God, I just want to rest in bed, man. Or I just want to do this.
Starting point is 00:26:27 I'd rather do this. But you know what? If you're not too sick, if you're not too debilitated, it's not a bad thing to just do light focus work. Just move. Try to figure out some technique where you're not doing anything hard. Or even a steam room or sauna. Sauna, yeah. Someone who asked me about the steam room versus sauna, I asked Rhonda Patrick,
Starting point is 00:26:45 and there hasn't really been studies done on the sauna or the steam room, rather, that show the benefits of the sauna. They're both hot as shit. They're both hot as shit. It probably has some benefit. The only difference is that the sauna can get way hotter because it's a dry heat.
Starting point is 00:26:59 So the sauna can get, you know, my sauna, I've had it up to more than 190. I fucked up and had it at 200. We sat in that sauna in Boston. You're a serial killer in there. 10 more minutes shopping, I've had it up to more than 190. I fucked up and had it at 200. We sat in that sauna in Boston. You're a serial killer in there. Ten more minutes shopping, I was dying. I was like, I think I'm set, man. I think I'm kind of set.
Starting point is 00:27:12 I'm all red like a lobster. You just got to go empty in there. I know. I hear you. But I was good, man. We were in there for a minute. Jamie dipped out super early. Ten minutes before you guys.
Starting point is 00:27:26 He was there before everybody. Oh, were you? I didn't know that. Yeah. Because he met me when you left away. Bossy. No, I'm just kidding. Jamie got there first.
Starting point is 00:27:33 Little beast. Shout out to Equinox in Boston. Great fucking gym. That was a good night, man. Yeah, they keep it at 170. That's what most people think it should be, 170. But if you was 170 with steam, man, you're getting cooked in there. That's not good. I don't think you should be, 170. But if he was 170 with steam, man, you're getting cooked in there. That's not good.
Starting point is 00:27:46 I don't think you can take that heat. So the idea is that the sauna, because it's a dry heat for the most part, I know sometimes people throw some water on the rocks, but it's a dry heat for the most part, and that is what you want because that's what your body responds to, just the actual temperature, and produces those heat shock proteins. Makes sense. Totally makes sense.
Starting point is 00:28:04 You know what's weird is sometimes in the UFC, and you can feel this too, if it's at a hockey arena like T-Mobile, sometimes when you get into the hockey arena and get in that crowd, it's freezing. Because there's ice underneath, it's freezing. It sucks for the fighter. It takes a while to get going. You'll see guys for the first round, they're like, God, he looks a little stiff.
Starting point is 00:28:24 What's going on here? It's freezing out there, man. You're just in shorts. You're see guys for the first round, you're like, God, he looks a little stiff. What's going on here? It's freezing out there, man. You're just in shorts. You're sweating in the back, and it's warm in that locker room. Then when you come out, it's this like, God damn. So you can feel a total difference when you get in there. Right away, I'd be like, God damn it. I'd always think about it. Is there a hockey team there? Oh, there's ice. So I
Starting point is 00:28:39 had to calculate that. For sure focus on something else. I didn't realize it until one day I saw like a crack in between the boards, the floorboards and I looked down and I went, that's fucking ice. There's ice there right now. They keep the ice there. They keep ice. They keep ice.
Starting point is 00:28:56 All these thousands of people chill on top of ice. Well, it can't break. I know, I'm just saying it's kind of weird. Oh, it's definitely weird. But it's cold. Is it better? Well, not for the fighters for sure, but is it better for the audience? Because sometimes it gets fucking hot in those places.
Starting point is 00:29:11 If you have just a big-ass chunk of ice in the middle of everybody, it'll keep going. It's kind of smart. The only time it's been super cookie is in Brazil. They just didn't use any AC or anything. I was in one of them, and was an open air place in Brazil. So we were indoors, but at the top, the top areas, it's like these big old open doors that face the outside. There was bugs flying around and shit.
Starting point is 00:29:36 That's some Brazilian shit, man. It was warm, man. It was moist and warm. There's one with Anik and someone, and they're literally just sweating the pit stains. They're just sweating it out. That happened in Abu Dhabi, too. We were in Abu Dhabi.
Starting point is 00:29:48 I was drenched. That was outdoors. That was an outdoors one. Yeah. Yeah. Who fought? Was that Munoz? Weidman?
Starting point is 00:29:56 Anderson, Damian Maia. That's right. Yeah. Weidman fought out there, too. I think he fought. BJ Penn fought Frankie Edgar. That's where Frankie Edgar won the title. And they've had Roy Nogg out there.
Starting point is 00:30:09 Yep. They haven't been back there in a while. It's been a while. It's been a minute. Hot minute. Yeah. That one was crazy because you saw bugs flying around. You never knew were real.
Starting point is 00:30:18 Oh, it's some Jumanji shit out there. I went on a hike. I was like, oh, I'm in Jumanji. This is cool. Like, what in the fuck is this? Shit you've never seen before. It's crazy how you go to other countries, man. They have completely different ecosystems.
Starting point is 00:30:31 The point where you look at things, you go, what in the fuck is that? What is that? But where it's dangerous, too. I remember when I was in Brazil, we were climbing this thing. And they go, now listen, fellas, you got to make sure. And we're with the locals. Like, you have to come down before nightfall. Otherwise, they're not going to find you.
Starting point is 00:30:45 What kind of shit is this? So we just dipped out, getting up there. My man, my man, our Lexington man got lost. We didn't see him for the rest of the night. Oh, no. And literally, the local was like, he's one with the jungle now. I'm like, what the fuck does that mean? So how did you lose him after he's-
Starting point is 00:31:03 Is this a bad rock movie? Is this the rundown or some shit? What do you mean he's one with the jungle? He just he showed up a day later just exhausted didn't get an ounce of sleep and someone in one of these huts took him under their wing and saved him.
Starting point is 00:31:18 Oh my god. People have to get helicoptered out of there if they get trapped at the top. I was like dude I feel like I shouldn't be doing this before a fight. I feel like this is a bad idea idea how many days before a fight was this this was like a week before jesus christ the guy in front of us had a sungan basically a speedo just asshole out in front of us just fucking going i'm like through the jungle with a speedo on barefoot and just doing work smoking us shredded tan fucking all outside you see what their feet look like like hobbits feet
Starting point is 00:31:46 like fucking they have the craziest feet ever these people that live in the forest they splay out like a hand and they
Starting point is 00:31:52 they're super thick toes and shit like it doesn't look anything like no we have bitch feet yeah oh dude believe me man
Starting point is 00:31:59 it feels good my feet were sore today I had to run in regular running shoes cause my feet are sore from the vibrams yeah from just the pounding the pounding I know I'm scared of that I had to run in regular running shoes because my feet are sore. From the Vibrams? Yeah, from just the pounding. The pounding.
Starting point is 00:32:07 I know. I'm scared of that plantar fasciitis. Have you ever had it? No. Get your mind right. Let's go and get on. There's a reason there's technology, son. Let's quit running barefoot these days.
Starting point is 00:32:16 No, no, no. I think the barefoot thing strengthens your feet up. I think it just takes time. I'm just being real careful. Be super careful. It's a nightmare. I'm sure. Donald Cruz had to deal with it. I done it's at night i had to get shots injections in my foot and with dom cruz it was the same thing it was coming back too quickly like he he had a knee
Starting point is 00:32:34 injury right so after his knee injury then he just tried to get way back into shape way quick and fucked his feet out mine was just i think from being so big and just running i was doing you know miles and miles and miles and miles. I love running. It's literally my favorite thing to do. Neil Brennan did it on a, he got planter from a treadmill from wearing those Vibrams. They say you got to work into them. You just don't want to go straight barefoot and just start doing work.
Starting point is 00:32:58 No, you definitely do. To me, it feels good to be barefoot. I like walking in the street. I feel like I'm doing something dangerous, like on the sidewalk barefoot. Yeah, like, ooh, I'm wild. I feel nice about it. I don't know what it is, man. It makes me feel free.
Starting point is 00:33:12 I know it's dirty and dangerous, but I don't care. It's supposed to be dirty and dangerous. That's what life is supposed to be. You're supposed to be interacting with other life. It's also your feet. It's your feet. It feels nice. Rubber barrier between you and the world.
Starting point is 00:33:24 That shit ain't right. You're always confined. I like letting them breathe a little bit, man. What if the Indians had it right with moccasins? Nah, I think there's no airflow with those goddamn moccasins. They didn't give a fuck what things smelled like back then.
Starting point is 00:33:35 Oh, they smelled like bullshit. They gave up on that fight. Yeah, they just didn't give a fuck. They felt like cheap bullshit. They gave up on that fight. If they could find a creek,
Starting point is 00:33:42 a temporary, put some of that fire out real quick. I'm not about that life. I'm not like that, man. But they would just run around with moccasins. They basically just had like a layer of leather between their foot and the ground. That's all they could do. Climb mountains with that.
Starting point is 00:33:56 Hey, hey, hey, what is this, Jamie? How dare you, Jamie? This guy is slicing chunks off of the bottom of his foot. Those are calluses? I mean, this is crazy. That makes you feel sick, bro. Man cuts calluses off his foot with a knife and dog eats it. This is the name of this video.
Starting point is 00:34:10 How the fuck did you find out? Look at these calluses, dude. This is insane. Bro. This guy is just slicing through these calluses like it's a coconut. Like it's coconut meat. It looks like a pineapple. This is insane.
Starting point is 00:34:22 Have you ever seen anybody have calluses like this before, though? I think this guy has a problem. That ain't normal. What kind of a man can just cut at his foot like that? How do you know how deep to cut when you don't cut your goddamn heel off? You know this dude is not sharp in that knife. That's not a sharp knife. That's not.
Starting point is 00:34:37 This is crazy, man. That guy has deep fucking feet. And the dog is eating it. The dog is taking the pieces of meat and eating it. The dog's a man-eater. What in the fuck is wrong with that dog? And how in the world did you find that, Jamie? What the fuck?
Starting point is 00:34:53 Jamie's got that bookmarked. Couldn't wait to bring it. Did you say feet? Just couldn't wait to drag that shit up. Who the fuck cuts off the bottom of their feet with a knife like that? And what's he doing to get his feet like that? And why is he yelling at that dog while that dog's eating his feet? That makes you this close to throwing up.
Starting point is 00:35:11 Wouldn't you, like, think that the dog would get used to that smell? Like, that's what I like to eat now. And then, like, you'll be sleeping. The dog's hungry. He's like, fuck it, I'm just going to snack out on this dude's feet. It's a zombie dog. You got a zombie dog in your hands now. Looks like a bloodhound, too.
Starting point is 00:35:23 Dog's a goddamn horrible monster. Meteor. Human eater. Wow. I feel super sick, man. On another note, how about that Brian Ortega? On another note, how about Brian Ortega, man? I don't know why I showed you yesterday night.
Starting point is 00:35:40 It was awkward because me and Brian are super close. And I don't know what it is because same thing with Stipe. Whenever I know these guys, I know him from when I trained with him and I've seen him in that light. Like with Brian Ortega, I cornered him for one of his fights before he got to the UFC. And I knew him as that Brian Ortega where all jiu-jitsu, cardio for days but terrified to fight.
Starting point is 00:36:00 Like I know him as that Brian. And now he's evolved into the number one featherweight in the world. So when he got the Frankieie egger fight i was like god i just feel like it's a terrible matchup man i'm telling henner i'm like what's he gonna do and i was like don't worry man don't worry and so on my show which brian and henner listened to they're like dude they come in like how you gonna pick against me i'm like no no i said my brain went with frankie just because it's Frankie Edgar. He's a legend.
Starting point is 00:36:27 My heart wanted you, Brian. He's like, dude, it hurt my feelings. I'm like, I'm sorry, man. And I don't know what it is. It was steep A2. Whenever I see him, I know him as that version of them. It's a problem I have. I like this gap.
Starting point is 00:36:38 I don't know what's going on. People always do that. They do that. They remember someone by what they were when they were at their worst. It's not even their worst, but it's their infancy of their careers. Well, let's not even say their worst. Just say a lesser version of who they are now. Correct. Right?
Starting point is 00:36:51 It's like, do you ever get that feeling when you go back to high school? Like, if I'm around someone from high school, I feel like a loser. You know, this is a weird feeling. A hundred percent. When I go back to Denver, I'm almost not myself because I feel like this loser. A loser. Yeah. Yeah, because you remember back who you were when you were insecure and starting out in life.
Starting point is 00:37:13 That's a normal thing. They always say that about comedy clubs. If you start out at a club, that club will never respect you. They respect you when you leave and maybe you get a TV show or something like that and then come back and they're like yeah yeah i remember when you sucked though yeah like they remember when you sucked yeah i always had i had a problem with that in boston at first really yeah because they remembered me as this guy was an opener and then you know how am i a headliner you're not a headliner i remember when you were opening you did 20 minutes you opened that's what you do i know like you're not a headliner. I had one night and I,
Starting point is 00:37:45 this isn't in my nature at all. And I'm going to go back. I've just been busy, but I had one night at the laugh factor where I've just, I bombed man. Bomb, bomb. Like,
Starting point is 00:37:54 like, I should probably not do this. Oh, just one guy in the back just goes, boom. I'm like, no doubt. No doubt,
Starting point is 00:38:03 man. I get in the car and I'm striving down sunset. I'm like, what the fuck am I doing man. I get in the car, and I'm driving down Sunset. I'm like, what the fuck am I doing, man? It's so embarrassing. I haven't been back since. But not because I'm like, oh, I'm scared of the Laugh Factory. It's just that I've been at the store and just been on the grind. But you do have it in your head.
Starting point is 00:38:17 Like, you got to get back up there and clean that up. And literally, I think about it every day. It's something back here. It's like, get your ass up there, man. I'm like, oh, but I'll go to the comedy store. Nope, get your ass up there. See, that's an athlete's perspective. That's the difference.
Starting point is 00:38:31 It's one of the things that I've been saying to people about you. The difference between the way you've been approaching comedy and another person would do it, you're doing it from an athlete's perspective. Like, you work hard at shit. And you know where your weaknesses are. You fix those. Other people will ignore them. It's a real problem.
Starting point is 00:38:46 Like someone will have a joke and the joke doesn't do well like several nights in a row, but they keep doing it the same way. Like why are you doing it the same way? You need to cut some of that out. You need to tweak this. You need to turn that around. You need to add something. Maybe you're not explaining it enough,
Starting point is 00:38:59 but if it's not doing well and you keep doing it the same exact way. It's not the crowds, homie. Yeah, you've got to figure out. They're there to laugh. People get stuck in a weird pattern, though, of wanting to do things the exact same way over and over again. Oh, dude, nothing's better to me when it's such an honor to, if I'm at the comedy store, or if I was at the comedy store in La Jolla and a comic go, hey, you should try this. I listen to your joke, you should button with this or try this.
Starting point is 00:39:23 I'm like, dude, that's brilliant, man. Yeah, every now and then someone will just nail it for you they just find they see something that maybe you didn't see like oh like you ever thought about going this direction like dude and it's not like they're writing your jokes like hey what if you went this direction with i'm like that dude that's brilliant man that happens in martial arts too right like hasn't someone like pointed something out to you like oh shit oh hundred percent oh, shit. Oh, 100% with a choker. Your hands are like this. Dude, you ever tried it like this?
Starting point is 00:39:47 I'm like, dude, yeah, that makes sense. It's so much easier. Yeah. Sometimes things don't seem like they would be easier, and they are. Like, that pretzel grip, this weird grip. You're like, why would I grab somebody like that? And then you do, and you're like, oh. If someone shows you.
Starting point is 00:40:01 But I feel like, not in my, yeah, it feels nice. Oh. Feels nice. Oh, you ain't getting none of that, are you? Some Brian Ortega shit. Dude, his guillotine is ridiculous. How does he grip it? And he's getting the, he has all sorts of variations.
Starting point is 00:40:17 That motherfucker is nice with it. He's here, you know, it's right, you know, he's here a lot of times. He goes flat. He's so good at it. So is he like Marcelo, like how Marcelo slides it under like a blade and then catches it? Yeah, the blade, yeah. And he's the best at the world in it. But he also, he's getting the respect now from the crowd because if you remember when Frankie kind of faked that shot and got a hole in his neck, the entire crowd goes, oh.
Starting point is 00:40:39 Yeah. Because now it's like, oh, shit. They realize what he's capable of. When that dude gets a hole in your neck, it's a totally different proposition. What he did to Cub Swanson at the end of the first round, he had Cub basically out. Cub was fucked, and it was just a matter of the time ran out, but that shit was fully locked in, and Cub wasn't going anywhere.
Starting point is 00:40:59 I got emotional yesterday when he came in the room because I haven't seen him since, and I went, not even on air, I went, hold on, stop there. I went, bro, hear me real quick. Before anyone tells you this, I know you're getting touched and all that. I went, you're the number one featherweight in the world. Remember when I cornered you for that rough and nasty fight in Glendale, where the fuck it was? Remember that?
Starting point is 00:41:17 Now you're the number one guy in the world, Brian. Let that soak in. He's the number one contender. Max Holloway's the number one in the world. He's ranked number one in the world. Right, but number one contender. True. Right. He's the number one contender. Max Holloway's the number one in the world. He's ranked number one in the world. Right, but number one contender. True. Right.
Starting point is 00:41:27 He's number one, all I'm saying. Max Holloway's the champ. Yeah, but that's the number one until they fight. He's the champ, but he's ranked number one in the world. I know. That was the message. I understand that. If I was Max Holloway, I'd be like, motherfucker!
Starting point is 00:41:40 Well, they're going to fight for sure. Max Holloway's the greatest featherweight in the world right now. But for Max, for Brian Ortega to go from, it's crazy to see, man. It's nuts. It's a very interesting fight. It's nuts. Because Ortega is super dangerous standing and on the ground. He's on a totally different level than anybody else.
Starting point is 00:41:56 They're also the same size. Yeah. Like Max Holloway usually has a big advantage with reach and size, but now they're kind of equal. Dude, Holloway is something special though, man. He's something special. Super special. What he did to Aldo, what he did to Aldo was crazy.
Starting point is 00:42:09 Twice. Twice. And the second time, more emphatic. Like he knew he was going to do it. No, Max Holloway's something special. Special. And it's almost like when you watch what he does, you can't appreciate it until you see it a bunch of times.
Starting point is 00:42:22 Because what he's doing, he's not knocking someone out with one head kick. He's not catching someone with some unbelievable, spectacular submission. No, what he's doing is just fucking you up. He's outclassing everybody. Regularly. With technique, and he's ferocious. What do you want to do? You want to do technique?
Starting point is 00:42:39 You want to do pace? You want to brawl? I'm going to draw the line right here. Come brawl. See how that goes for you. That's what Brian can't fall into. And Brian will be, I'm sure, in Vegas eyes, the underdog, which rightfully so. It's Max Holloway, the greatest featherweight in the world right now. So with Brian, he just has to be careful. Max will lure you into that brawl, and he's not going to lose those brawls. Yeah, he's very good at brawling.
Starting point is 00:42:59 That's for damn sure. And the crazy thing was the Lamas fight. Oh, my God. Ricardo Lamas, he's beating his ass. And then he just points to the center of the schedule. He goes, come on, man Oh, my God. Ricardo Llamas, he's beating his ass. And then he just points to the center of the schedule. He goes, come on, man, let's fucking throw it out. No, he's one of my favorite fighters. He just bites his mouthpiece down.
Starting point is 00:43:11 It's just windmilling out. He can do that. He can do technique. He can do jiu-jitsu, whatever you want to do. Yep, whatever you want to do. It sounds like, from what Brian told me, is they're aiming for that international fight week. So you have DC, Stipe, maybe Cyborg, Amanda Nunes.
Starting point is 00:43:25 Then you got Brian Ortega, Max Holloway. Well, Max just broke his foot. So what are we at right now? How many weeks is he out? Is he even out of his cast yet? I don't think he's out of his cast. I saw a photo of him on Instagram. It was about two weeks ago he had a cast on.
Starting point is 00:43:38 He's on Tough helping DC, right, though? He's probably doing it on crutches or standing on his cast. So we're in March, April may june april may june july four months um a foot of bone and a foot is not it's not an easy one because you're always standing on it no and then when you get back it's gonna take time yeah and then you're gonna be real hesitant to kick things well hey i'm not the one starting the rumor international fight week that's what yeah Fight Week. That's what Ortega's hearing. They want to do it in Hawaii. Obviously, Henner and Bryan, they're like, we'd love to go to Hawaii, go to his hometown
Starting point is 00:44:11 and do it. But, you know, there's a lot of moving pieces for UFC to get to Hawaii. Well, the other thing is inside and outside. Like, how big of an arena do they have that's inside? Well, outside they have the stadium, right? They could do the giant stadium, which would sell out. It would sell out, but what if it rained, which it does in Hawaii all the time.
Starting point is 00:44:30 Are we fighting in the rain? Wet and wild. Remember that one? You wouldn't watch that? King of the Cage? Yeah, you wouldn't watch that rainy? I mean, it'd be so weird, but it's a good risk to have. Yeah, it's a good risk to have.
Starting point is 00:44:42 You can't have it, though. That would be phenomenal for Brian, if they could just slip to the ground real quick. Amazing for Brian. I mean, he has a good advantage over almost everybody at 145 when it comes to jiu-jitsu. Like, who doesn't he have an advantage of when it comes to jiu-jitsu at 145? There's no one. No one more dangerous than T-City as far as on the ground. Right.
Starting point is 00:45:03 The way he locks onto things, there's a finality to it. His strength and now his belief in himself with it. He knows how dangerous he is. And really, he's almost, you know, people haven't seen what that kid's capable of either. We've seen some cool stuff, but some of his flying triangles, his flying
Starting point is 00:45:20 arm bars, and his grips and stuff, and his guillotines, and he has a lot of cool setups that we haven't even touched on. Yeah, he's one of the most impressive guys I've ever seen in terms of, like, when he starts locking something up, you know it's over. Game over. Whoa. Game over.
Starting point is 00:45:36 Just super high level. Very interesting. Because he doesn't have, like, world championship, you know, victories in his past, right? No, he didn't come up through, like, the IBJFF, whatever the hell it is, or he didn't go to Metamorphs, anything like that. He's just this kid that grew up on the Gracie mats, and over time was that kid who was just like, God damn, he's good, and just kept with it, kept with it, kept with it.
Starting point is 00:45:57 Yeah. Now the crazy thing is his striking has become just as deadly. Fluid, loose. You crack Frankie Edgar with an elbow like that, and then starch him with that uppercut, that's like, he can do that to you standing now? He lifted him off his feet? Yeah. Yeah. It was nasty.
Starting point is 00:46:12 Incredible. So where's the picnic? Picnic's not standing. Not right now. That's no picnic. Well, for Max Holloway, he's probably looking at it going, the picnic for me is standing because he's so goddamn, you know, good at it. But you can't just say that's a huge advantage anymore after you see ortega because remember he's knocked out clay guida with knees
Starting point is 00:46:30 you know now after you knock out frankie egger like that you at least have to acknowledge the kid can do some stand-up damage i think yes but i think there's a real concern with if they're going to try to fight in july with halloween not having enough time to recover i hope i'm wrong but when i'm looking at that, when you just said it's March, I was like, yeah, it is March, isn't it? April, May, June, July. That's four months. How healed up
Starting point is 00:46:54 are you after four months? Are you ready to throw kicks and get your foot checked? Well, who knows? Maybe they also told or Brian, hey, we're shooting for July summer or something like that, but they don't realize where Max Holloway... You know how this goes. Maybe it's on another card. Maybe I'm wrong
Starting point is 00:47:10 though. Six weeks is what it takes for Bowen to heal. I'm sure Max will tweet us or something. Like, yeah, I'm good right now, bitch. Google what it takes for a healthy... What is Max? Like 28? No. 27? Aren't him and Brian Ortega the same age? A couple of young bucks. And this won't be the last time you see a Brian Ortega and Max Holloway fight.
Starting point is 00:47:28 What's that? He's 26. 26. Sorry. Ortega's 27. Go to how long does it take. Just Google how long does it take for a bone on a 26-year-old man to heal. And then cut it in half because Max Holloway.
Starting point is 00:47:44 Yeah. You know how the doctors, you're going to be out about six months. Well, yes, if I'm a soccer mom, six months. For me, it's going to be about three. Thank you, sir. I'm going to push it at three, you giant pussy. That's also a way to blow out those ACL reconstructions. That's how doctors are.
Starting point is 00:47:59 They used to do all these old people. Like, you're out for about a year. That's true. Three months, doc. Kick rocks. You know what, man? This tendon injury that that i got i got golfer's elbow that really made me um aware there's a difference between injuring a muscle and injuring a tendon 100 they don't have much blood supply man it's a fucking pain in the dick to get that to heal i'm stunned at how long it takes and how
Starting point is 00:48:23 many different things i've done when Since you told me that, I was doing pull-ups and it started hurting here. I've stopped doing for a little bit. For me, it's just here. It's just this elbow. Mine started hurting in there. It went to here and I'm like, you know, I'm going to chill out on that stuff. I got a chunk of something floating around there too. You got like a piece of hard something or another.
Starting point is 00:48:40 I fell once in Alaska. Callan and I were on this deer hunting trip and I slipped off the side of a cliff and cracked my elbow on this rock. And it was hurting for months afterwards. Like, every time I would do a chin-up, it would hurt. And I just sucked it up. And I think I might have chipped a piece of bone off in there. I think there's something floating, or it's a piece of calcium that's built up because of irritation that can happen.
Starting point is 00:49:04 Just let it ride, bro.. Just let it ride, bro. You got this, man. Bro science. Dude, speaking of people getting fucked up, how about that girl Cyborg fight? She looks scared. When she got hit with the first one, her eyes were like, oh my god. And god bless her, man, because your first fight in UFC,
Starting point is 00:49:20 here you go. This is what you always want. Here's Cyborg main event. Short notice. Enjoy that. Yeah, that's kind of a crazy thing to do, right? Title shot, your first fight ever in the UFC. Title shot, your first fight ever. Nobody knows, literally nobody in the UFC knows who you are. The UFC didn't even have a picture up of her until the week of the fight.
Starting point is 00:49:38 You've never, I mean, she got submitted by Tanya Avenger. That's tough. She submitted Tanya, and then Tanya submitted her. And we know that she's a 135er. Yeah, that's her wincing in pain as Cyborg lowers the boom on her. She took Cyborg down, though. She did. That weird.
Starting point is 00:49:53 Yeah, well, that was obviously the strategy. The strategy was to close the distance, get that clinch, drag Cyborg to the ground. She's a 135er, man. She really is not big enough. But for Cyborg, it's like, what do you want me to do, man? Like, there's no one in the division. What is stopping that Megan Anderson chick from coming over? Her work visa.
Starting point is 00:50:12 She doesn't have it? She was here illegally or something like that. I know that was the hold up there. Some bullshit. Lawyers, get on that. I know, man. Let's go. Because she's a legit competitor.
Starting point is 00:50:24 Big girl. Pretty. Australianian yeah fight her ass off tattooed up she's actually one you know she's in the same weight class she's not a girl yeah yeah and she wants to fight you know for kat zingano want the fight too she's talking all that shit can someone call trump i can get it done kat zingano wants to fight well well kat zingano did want the cyborg fight but since she lost that last one right yeah split decision you ain't getting cyborg's not sniffing no no no no no no there's no way she's gonna have to get a couple of it because she lost her last one too yeah she took juliana pena yeah
Starting point is 00:50:57 she's taking too much you could see the ring rust was there and the nerves were there she just she needs time she's time she can compete there withborg, I'm not even trying to be funny here. She's not going to lose to a single woman. She needs to fight two women or there needs to be a dude in there. But one girl is not going to beat her. I hate to tell you guys. It's just not. I don't know how you're going to market that.
Starting point is 00:51:17 You're telling me you wouldn't watch her over CM Punk? Well, I think you put her as co-main event a lot on some cards that have a lot of great fights. I just think that the problem is people are always going to be willing to watch whoever steps in and fights her. But to have her be the center of a giant event, I think it's going to take a real challenger. Like Holly. Those ratings were good. Like, yeah, that was a good fight because that was a fight where people were like, hmm, Holly, you know, is legit. Like real skillful boxer.
Starting point is 00:51:43 It shows you how good Holly is, too, because she went to get out the decision although she you know Holly was never really winning that fight but maybe one more round yeah she got lit up you realize when you're in there fighting cyborg it's totally different proposition when you see cyber you're just like oh man she's never gonna lose until father time my guess touches around the shoulder right now she's only 32 you crazy? It's not young, but it's not old either. No, she's not old. That's prime. She could do this for another five years. Easy. When you think about how long she's
Starting point is 00:52:12 been around, like way back in the Gino Carano fight, how old was she then? Jesus, man. Super young. Super young. She's been doing it for a minute. Dude, do you ever watch that fight again? It's not a bad fight. People don't give Gino enough credit. No. Gino mounted her at one point in time. Gina, first team, all diabetes.
Starting point is 00:52:27 Captain of the team. Yeah, she's pretty hot. But out of respect to Kevin Ross, this would be the end of this conversation when it comes to how hot Gina Carano is. Is that her man? What's he do? Kevin Ross, the Muay Thai fighter. Oh, yeah.
Starting point is 00:52:39 He's all tatted up. They're still together? Yeah. Good for them, man. Good for them. Good for them. Hopefully she's a good cool dude. Here's the fight. Yeah's she's got to be very cool because he's very cool they're damn yeah they're both at the beginning of fight she's just teeing off on gina she takes her down
Starting point is 00:52:53 and up and gina wands up on top of her look at gina doing work people forget how good that girl was man oh she's very good look at that cyborg every girl should give her royalties for starting women's mma let's be real She actually had a half-assed heel hook here, or a half-decent heel hook here. Gina Turner getting out of it. Yeah, she popped out. Yeah, Gina Crown, I mean, she just, think how big Gina Crown would be if she was in the sport right now. Oh, Jesus.
Starting point is 00:53:17 Cyborg's hitting her with some hammers. This was, yeah, she would be gigantic. She'd be so big. Because she was big when the UFC was really in its infancy. She was big on Showtime. What year do you think this fight was, if you had to guess? 2004? Six.
Starting point is 00:53:35 Nine. 2009. Really? Nine. Wow. Cyborg, vicious kick to the body. So Cyborg was only like, what, 22-ish? Her takedowns were so bad.
Starting point is 00:53:45 She fell down again and this time Gina mounts her. Look at that. Like people forget. Gina's getting them out because of Cyborg's mistakes on his takedowns. but she's still mounted.
Starting point is 00:53:52 Hell yeah. This is the most trouble we've ever seen Cyborg in besides that Muay Thai fight. And Gina's going to let her up. No, Gina was an absolute monster. People forget, man.
Starting point is 00:54:02 But with Cyborg, I'm dead serious. I'm even trying to be funny. Unless two women enter that octagon against her, she's not going to lose. Yeah. Or you need to get Khabib monster people forget man but with cyber i i'm dead serious i'm even trying to be funny unless two women enter that octagon against her she's not gonna lose yeah or you need to get khabib up in that bitch well she obviously has some physical attributes now when you think about the rest of the women at 145 no one stands out what they're going to do is amanda nunez that's the fight yeah man news wants it cyborg wants it the i like the fight and i think technically amanda nunez is better as far as
Starting point is 00:54:31 a technician as cyborg however for let's say that's five rounds even three rounds over those three rounds she's i don't think she possesses the same power as cyborg you know i'm saying the cyborg hits a girl you see it on their face. The stoppage of Gina Carano when we're watching on the big screen, it's horrific. Yeah, it's a tough one.
Starting point is 00:54:50 It's horrific. When she gets her down, like the hammers that she drops on her. I was more of a Cyborg fan. I'm more of a Cyborg fan now. Back then, I was first team all Gina.
Starting point is 00:55:01 No one wanted that. No one wanted that. Did she test positive for this fight? No, I thought it was after this. It was another fight. Did she test positive for this fight? No, I thought it was after this. It was another fight. Yeah, it wasn't this fight. That'd be way bigger news. But Cyborg Amanda's a good fight.
Starting point is 00:55:14 That's a really good fight. I just, and I'm a huge Amanda Nunes fan, I just think over that time, she's going to land some shots on Cyborg. Cyborg will get hit, but when Cyborg hits you, it's just, you can't play that game with her there's there's no female in the world who can play that game with her you give
Starting point is 00:55:28 me one i'll take one you here you here it just doesn't work yeah who knows man that's interesting it's a great fight though amanda's got legit one punch power legit smack them up power real black belt in jujitsu very good at fighting knows how to fight phenomenal fighter yeah she knows how to fight forget about all the things that she can do she puts it together well you know who can fight cyborg yep she's the greatest female fighter of all time it's hard to argue it's hard to argue right yeah it's hard to argue there's some caveats in there obviously but it's hard to argue yeah yeah there's some some caveats, I guess, if you want to go down that road, but still, in the UFC with the USADA testing,
Starting point is 00:56:08 she's still the best. So that kind of takes it out of the window. We go, well, she was the best back then. She tested hot. Cool. Now she's in the most strict testing pool of all time. She's still dominating. So where's your argument there now? Well, you know the argument.
Starting point is 00:56:21 That she retained all the shit from when she was taking it back in the day? She definitely retained something. Not everything, though. Ask Hector Lombard. It's a question. argument that she retained all the shit from when she was taking it back in the day definitely retained something i'm not everything though ask hector lombard it's a question ask vitor belfort right that's true but those are men it's different the idea of you know a guy taking shit or a girl taking it don't you think they're different it's it's different but it's also it's different there's an argument there but it's not different to the point where after, was that 2009 you said? So after nine years, she's still retaining this muscle mass and she was born a bigger female.
Starting point is 00:56:52 That's true too. That's true too. Like no matter what Gabby Garcia did, she's still 6'4". Correct. She's still a giant. Dude, she was at the UFC. I was like, holy shit. You're scared.
Starting point is 00:57:02 Terrifying. She's way too big. I'm terrified of all of them. She's so big. Do you see? She wasn't sitting like a lady, so security had to come behind you in D.C. and step in front of her. She can't sit like a lady.
Starting point is 00:57:14 She's got Hulk legs. She might. Maybe no wear dress, though. How the fuck is she crossing those legs, bro? It's too much damage. They're so big. Yeah, some thickies. If you have one of them super tank crossfit squat girls, those giant legs.
Starting point is 00:57:29 With the blood ass and the quads in the front. Can they even cross their legs? I'm sure. How could they cross their legs? You can cross your legs. You have some thick ass legs. I cross my legs. It's comfortable.
Starting point is 00:57:38 And I got a pterodactyl dick in between. Dude, I don't think pterodactyls have big dicks. You might want to change that one up. It's a bird. But they have tails. Do they? I don't think pterodactyl dick is a twing. Dude, I don't think pterodactyls have big dicks. You might want to change that one up. It's a bird. Well, they have tails. Do they? I don't know. They're a bird.
Starting point is 00:57:50 They are a bird. They're not a dinosaur. Well, they're not a dinosaur, yeah. Did you know that? They're in a class of themselves. Yeah, someone was telling me that. My kid told me that. Oh, that's right.
Starting point is 00:57:59 A fucking seven-year-old. See, this way right here, this is uncomfortable as fuck. Oh, I'm so comfy. This is a nut cruncher. I'm so comfortable. Yeah, but nut cruncher. I'm so comfortable. Yeah, but you got an extra foot of leg. Yeah, there's a lot of room here. But with Gabby Garcia, remember when she was like big, bloated girl and she got Shred City?
Starting point is 00:58:16 Yeah, Shred City for a while. Oh, totally natural. Shred City. And then she backed in between? She's back to giant again. I think Japan. Why not try and cut to 45? What are you talking about?
Starting point is 00:58:26 45. Dude, she's 6'4". Do you know she's 6'4"? I'm being the UFC or not? She can't make 45. What are you going to do? Cyborg cut from 70 to make it. She's good friends with Cyborg, too. Look how big she was when she got small and how big she is now.
Starting point is 00:58:42 Dude, she was hot when she was small. She wasn't bad. That's what I saw. That's what I saw in the air. Like, look at that. That's when she was on the Ultimate Fighter with Vandaler. I wonder where she's at mentally when she sees herself. Like, does she dig that?
Starting point is 00:58:55 Like, that's her thing? Because a lot of dudes are into that. She can't go online. Look at the size of her. I had a friend who's a female bodybuilder. Thick. Thicker than a Snickers. Definitely Deca. Gold's Gym. just inner ass.
Starting point is 00:59:10 Yeah, just protein powder seeping out of her goddamn eyes. Get that pink one above it to the right. Above and to the right. Okay. That's acceptable. You're not mad at it. Not mad at it at all. So at one point in time in the recent future, she got down to the body of a really hot CrossFitter. How much did she weigh there, though?
Starting point is 00:59:24 She's probably still 1,000 pounds. She's 6'4". That's mean, bro. What do you think? 160 there? No. I bet she's 200 there. She's 6'4"?
Starting point is 00:59:32 She's 200. Bro, she's not 200 pounds there. I bet she's 200. Don't you think? Jamie? Jamie? She's 6'4". Come on, bro.
Starting point is 00:59:42 Okay, maybe she's 195, but I'm not going any lower than that. That's a big girl. She's a legit 6'4"? Pretty sure. Find out how tall she is. She's stronger than me. That's whatever. But there's some dudes who are, there's a market for that.
Starting point is 00:59:57 I got a friend who was a bodybuilder, and she was busy because she would do a little bit of strains for some change and get oiled up. She's only 6'2". I'm sorry 236 six two we can make one 45. she's just gonna lose 100 pounds nothing around john's going say what i got you what would what do you think would happen if she just got completely off of everything and just ran marathons what do you think she'd get down to i don't think she's lower than 160. 36's what? 236? 6'2", 236. Look at the fucking size of her. Probably 170. Jesus Christ.
Starting point is 01:00:29 Look at that girl. I'm going to death right now. Look at this poor girl. I'm about to go to my death. Did you see her beat up the grandma? Yes, with the knee brace. She beat up a grandma with a knee brace, bro. That grandma is struggle city.
Starting point is 01:00:42 Here's her. First of all, she's really good at jiu-jitsu, by the way. Phenomenal. You know Mackenzie Dern and her have matches. Yeah, Mackenzie beat her on points. How crazy is that? That's how badass Mackenzie Dern is. She poked this chick, apparently.
Starting point is 01:00:54 If I'm that chick, I'd fake like I get poked, too. Yeah, good move. I'd fall down. I'd black out. She's rushing, though. She'll get murdered. She gets back to rushing. She's got to get in there.
Starting point is 01:01:03 Someone's got to bet. I bet you make it to one minute. Survive any way you can for one minute. Dude, I just. Boom. How did they not have her fight dudes? It's a whole fight. Oh, that's it?
Starting point is 01:01:14 Yeah, there's no contest. Oh, good move for her. Good for the Russian. No more can go. The fight has gone one minute. My obligation is over here. Do you think about Herber Cyborg? Herber Cyborg. Cyborg will fuck her up jeff novitsky's like a hike for a couple weeks so much better standing up than her
Starting point is 01:01:32 she would have to take cyborg down and cyborg would fuck her up so once you want to watch that no really for obvious reasons that we can't talk about look at that there she is right there but legit black belt in Brazilian Jiu Jitsu. You can say whatever you want about it, but the girl works her ass off. Works her ass off. No matter what you take, you don't get that big unless you're training hard.
Starting point is 01:01:57 She's just dropping bombs in this chick. Her striking's gotten a lot better. A lot more smooth and relaxed. She was having a hard time when she first got oh she got tagged that leah de tapa is doing work she looks like oh she got tagged again damn her striking is terrible well she's hurt she's hurt she's just i know but this is what got me joe oh look at this chick's going come come on, come on, come to the center. Come to the center. Damn, she's like, bring it.
Starting point is 01:02:25 She's getting a little emotional, though. That Ryzen just free for all, and I appreciate it. Ryzen's so gangster. They're so gangster. They're trying to bring back the golden days. I know. You know what? That day's over, so kind of give it a rest, but I like what they're doing.
Starting point is 01:02:39 You see, Bellator brought CrowCrop back. I know. CrowCrop Roy. Just don't test anybody. We've seen that. Just don't test anybody. Please. I know. Don't. Bellator, just Crop back. I know. Crow Crop Roy. Just don't test anybody. We've seen that. Just don't test anybody. Please. I know.
Starting point is 01:02:46 Don't. Just don't. Bellator, just stop testing people. That's all the same with the Jon Jones thing against Brock Lesnar. Hey, Jeff Nowitzki, let's go grab a cup of coffee while these boys rumble, huh? Hey, Jeff, I love you. Why don't you go on vacation to Hawaii while Jon and Brock take a little trip here? The UFC is clean, but Bellator doesn't have to be.
Starting point is 01:03:07 The UFC decided to go down that USADA road, and they've committed to it. It's changed the game legitimately. For sure. Let's be honest. When you've got a legend. He's drugged us a fucking life up. You've got a legend like Crow Cop. He still wants a fight.
Starting point is 01:03:22 Just give him a little help. 100%. Just a little help.% just a little help come on that's real I'm not saying he needs it I'm not it's not a knock on him
Starting point is 01:03:31 he's upset at me because Boss Rooten was saying that during one of his fights that they paid him all this money and they had to bring
Starting point is 01:03:40 all this money back like Boss is explaining how they brought him into a room you didn't say it Boss said it but he thinks that I said it because it was on your show yeah. Boss said it. You didn't say it. Boss said it. But he thinks that I said it. Because it was on your show?
Starting point is 01:03:47 Yeah, it was on my show. I didn't know what Boss was going to say. And if I heard anything about it, I heard it from Boss. Because Boss worked there. And Boss is just fucking hilarious. And he's telling me about how they would pay those guys in cash. Well, he doesn't like you. He likes me.
Starting point is 01:04:00 And I punched him in the face. So me and him are friends. But I just want him to know I'm a big fan. Hell yeah. I don't want to find anything bad for Crowe Cup. I always enjoyed watching him. He's the example that I always use of what happens when you get an explosive striker versus a technical striker
Starting point is 01:04:16 in MMA. I think when you get a high level striker that's used to a certain style of fighting and then they fight in MMA sometimes that style doesn't translate over. I don't think Peter Ertz would have done that good as an MMA fighter. I don't think Ernesto Hoost would have done that good because they would have to have changed the way they strike because they're so technical. And it's really fun to watch fight and they would brawl for sure.
Starting point is 01:04:38 But what Merkel would do was have these big one shots, these big one kicks, these big one punches, just jump in with one shots, these big one kicks, these big one punches, just jump in with one shot, super fast and quick. That is really beneficial in MMA, more so even than kickboxing. Because of the volume? Well, he's fighting guys who are, at the time, they were concerned about takedowns, you're concerned about all these different things that could possibly happen in an MMA fight, right? So no one stands the way they stand in kickboxing.
Starting point is 01:05:10 When they're standing in kickboxing, they're more sideways. They're more light on their feet. They're moving around because they don't have to worry about being taken down. It's a totally different proposition. It's also a dance and a rhythm. Yeah, so a guy like Hoost would just pick you apart, start leg kicking you, chopping you down. If he's got to think about takedowns, even really great strikers are susceptible to one-pot shots in MMA because there's so many more things you're thinking of.
Starting point is 01:05:34 That's why Kevin Randleman cracked Krokop and knocked him out of that fight because he's got to worry about the takedown. If they were just in a kickboxing fight, Kevin Randleman and Krokop just in K1. Nightmare for Kevin Randleman. It's a nightmare for Kevin Randleman and Krokop just in K-1. Nightmare for Kevin Randleman. It's a nightmare for Kevin Randleman. Think about Wonderboy Woodley. Yes. Wonderboy all day.
Starting point is 01:05:50 Same thing. If they get in a kickboxing match. All day. Wonderboy lights him up. Woodley, that one-shot power, and he dropped Wonderboy before. I've got to say that even in kickboxing, Woodley, I think, would do very well because he's so powerful. You'd be able to manage it more, though. You'd be able to manage it. You have bigger gloves, so you can catch more, and also
Starting point is 01:06:09 his punches aren't as dangerous. So when he's hitting you, it's not as dangerous. You can catch the kicks a little bit better. Still not fun. Hell no. But Woodley had octagons at night, man. We got one shot power. Yeah, those little gloves. God, hopefully he fights soon, man.
Starting point is 01:06:25 He's going to. He had shoulder surgery, had a torn labrum, so he's pounding on that, trying to get that fixed up. Probably beat Dos Anjos. That's what they're going to do. Maybe they'll do that International Fight Week, too. Dun, dun, dun. Everybody getting paid.
Starting point is 01:06:39 Sizzler. We got Sizzler. We're trying to get these ratings up for Fox Buys WWE. Can you imagine if Brock's first fight back is Jon Jones? Yeah, I can. Yeah, I can, sir. This is the card I'm looking at. Motherfuckers.
Starting point is 01:06:50 Not in July. Yes! Yes! Stipe, DC. Greatest fighter of all time. Jon Jones, Brock. Preach. Tyron Windley, Dos Anjos.
Starting point is 01:07:01 Ortega, Max Holloway. Amanda Nunes, Cyborg. We busting this load on this one card. Hoo, hoo, hoo, hoo. Kick,ga. Max Holloway. Amanda Nunes. Cyborg. We busting this load on this one card. Hoo, hoo, hoo, hoo. Kikikikoo. We can still do the ratings. That place would be insane.
Starting point is 01:07:16 That would be one of the greatest cards of all time. And then on top, you sprinkle in a little CM Punk. Mmm... You wouldn't be able to do that one. Why? Because that one needs so much money. The one that I'm thinking about.
Starting point is 01:07:31 Which one? You know the one. Which one, Joe? The one that was a lot of sprinkles on top. Which one? You know that boxer guy. What's his name? Oh, you're talking about Floyd CM Punk. Something money that we keep talking about.
Starting point is 01:07:40 If that happened, this is, by the way, I believe you and I were the first to speculate this publicly. Correct. I think that's the fight. I think that's the fight to make. I agree. I don't know if it'll ever happen, but I think if it does happen, it happens on its own individual card. You put a kick-ass card underneath it, but I don't know if you put a UFC 200-size kick-ass card underneath it. No, because Floyd and CM Punk's going to sell.
Starting point is 01:08:01 And also, if you're Floyd, just looking at it from Floyd's perspective, all right, pay me this much money, which is a boatload of cash, and also give me the guy who has zero experience like me in CM Punk, who's a huge name. So it makes sense. It's the only fight to make for Floyd because Conor will literally kill him. Yeah, he can't do that. It wouldn't be fair. It's not fair.
Starting point is 01:08:21 Conor would beat up Floyd in CM Punk in the same night. People would understand the difference between Conor boxing Floydyd which you got clearly outclassed but he hit him like floyd's not gonna do anything no it's no competition it doesn't it doesn't make sense it doesn't make sense floyd makes sense he'll get kicked once in the legs and be like oh my god now i can't walk and then he gets kicked in the same spot like oh jesus christ and he's folding over he's getting front kicked in the gut. Conor's talking shit to him. You get head kicked viciously.
Starting point is 01:08:49 And then you're on that highlight reel. And the UFC's using that loop over and over and over. And it takes one clinch, just one clinch, and you're on your back. If you're CM Punk, then you're fighting Floyd. I am army crawling over to Floyd. Go ahead and punch me, bro. I say you stand karate style. You stand karate style, and you throw sidekicks. And you just walk towards him throwing sidekicks. There's so much distance. You go not even... Go ahead and punch me, bro. I say you stand karate style. You stand karate style and you throw sidekicks.
Starting point is 01:09:06 And you just walk towards him throwing sidekicks. There's so much distance. Until you get him to the cage? Yes. Why would you even want to box him? You stand total Wonderboy side stance. Just stand like this.
Starting point is 01:09:15 Way back, Leota Machida style and just throw sidekicks. Keep them off you. And then when the move is, whenever it happens, get that clench and throw fucking everything.
Starting point is 01:09:24 I agree. He weighs 145 legitimate pounds. That's what Floyd weighs. I would even just bear hug him and just pull him on top of me and sweep him and get full amount. I would literally just come at Floyd like this. Just walk straight forward like the Terminator. Floyd can make welterweight. He can make welterweight in boxing. He could.
Starting point is 01:09:41 That's the only problem with this fight that we're speculating is what weight are they going to fight at? Because CM Punk's not small. No, he was a legit-sized 170. So he would... We're going catchweight here? He'd have to be catchweight. At 60? See, that's the other thing.
Starting point is 01:09:56 You drain CM Punk down to 160, and he's fucksville. Yeah, let's do that. Yeah. Well, here's the thing. At 170, he doesn't have a lot of muscle But he's got a little bit of fat He's on shred city He might be able to do 65
Starting point is 01:10:11 He does it smart and long You know, he takes a long time to do it Adjusts his calories Really ramps up his cardio Just forces himself to do an hour of cardio After every training session Has anyone seen him lately? That man looking thinner?
Starting point is 01:10:22 No He's gonna have to look a lot thinner to get that fight. Or Floyd just says, I don't give a fuck. I'm going to light this dude up. Because when they're standing, when he's got to close the distance on CM Punk, Floyd has four ounce gloves on. Are you fucking kidding me? And he's impossible to hit.
Starting point is 01:10:37 You're not going to hit him. That's not happening. And he can catch you coming in and it's going to be fucking night-night. Even the leg kicks. Like, boy, can you even kick his legs? How fast does CM Punk kick? You know what I mean? We're not talking about, like, Yodson Clyde. That's not the move for CM Punk.
Starting point is 01:10:53 Yeah. Sir, just do what you got to do to get to the ground. Didn't he have a karate background? CM Punk? Yes. As much as I have a karate background. And I'm not making fun of him. Wasn't there, like, a video of him when he was, like, 13 or some shit?
Starting point is 01:11:04 I guess. Doesn't count. I played dodgeball he was like 13 or some shit? I guess. Doesn't count. I played dodgeball too. Not on the resume. Not on my resume. Doesn't count. Soccer player. I'm going to put that on my fucking Twitter handle now.
Starting point is 01:11:14 Guys do that. I played soccer when I was six. Yeah, that doesn't count, man. I played it. Yeah. I get pissed so hard, bro. I get pissed so hard. Go piss, man.
Starting point is 01:11:21 You all right? Yeah. Jesus. I don't want to throw up. It's that cold brew. This new cold brew we're snacking on. Goddamn, bro. Go piss, man. You all right? Yeah. Jesus. I don't want to throw up. It's that cold brew. This new cold brew we're snacking on. God damn, Jamie. What were you showing me right before the podcast started about some dude who just retired because he had a brain injury?
Starting point is 01:11:36 Oh, yeah. There's an NFL running back. I was just seeing the story, so I don't know too much about it, but I know who he is. His name is Beanie Wells. He was a running back in the NFL. He had an MRI, and it's showing brain injury so he's starting he's already publicly stating he's having problems with that he's having memory loss speech problems how old is this gentleman 29 I think man yeah man he's already going under
Starting point is 01:12:02 treatment right now so like he's he would be one of the first people I've heard of that is already getting treatment for what I guess they can tell now about potential. So what do they do? How are they treating it? There he is, handsome fella. Former Cardinals RB Beanie Wells dealing with traumatic brain injury. So they know for a fact that he has it. So he must be one of the recipients of one of the newer tests that allows them to see while a person's alive. Because it used to be they used to have to do an autopsy to find out what's wrong with your brain.
Starting point is 01:12:31 Here's this quote. He says he has some plaque separation. That shows that you've experienced some sort of TBI. And says when you have plaque separation, it shows you've experienced some traumatic brain injury. Obviously, that traumatic injury for me would come from playing football. Not only that, they had some cells tacked onto that separated plaque that I needed to get under control. What does that mean, you think?
Starting point is 01:12:55 I mean, extra cells I only know as being bad for cancer type stuff. Right. Still not out of the woods yet, but I'm hopeful. Wow. Well, at least he sees it, right? You know, and he got a hold of it now. When did he stop playing? Pretty recently.
Starting point is 01:13:11 And he would also be in Columbus, which would be at Ohio State, where they have not only, like, the James Cancer Place, but I think they're doing the tests or some of the early tests on this. Oh. If I remember correctly. Okay. I think you even told me it was at Ohio State. Maybe not.
Starting point is 01:13:23 I don't know. I talk too much. I forget some of the shit I say. I remember correctly. I think you even told me it was at Ohio State. Maybe not. I don't know. I talk too much. I forget some of the shit I say. I really do. I've realized that when someone asked me what podcast Eric Weinstein and Heather Hying were on, and I
Starting point is 01:13:37 had to think about it. It's like 1080-something. I thought about, like, how the fuck could I ever remember what I said if they were all one hour? A thousand different conversations plus 80 something and I thought about like how the fuck could I ever remember what I said if they were all one hour a Thousand different conversations plus fight companions. Yeah, this is I think it is Ohio State There's a thing and this is on their medical Wexner Center medical website. They have Advanced imaging and neurosensitive care and rehab services. That's right. We're talking brain trauma. Yeah, we're talking about that football player that Just got tested.
Starting point is 01:14:05 He had plaque separation in his brain. How long did he play for, Jamie? So probably about seven years, I think. In the NFL. He's obviously the exception, though. You know, there's obviously a problem, but he's definitely the exception. I wonder.
Starting point is 01:14:21 Football's been around for so long. I think a lot of people just live with it. And the thing is, what is that APOE3, something that Rhonda Patrick was talking about, like a gene? Like somehow the way it expresses itself, I know I'm butchering this for the science people going crazy. The science people. I know I'm butchering this for the science people going crazy. The science people. But it's more likely that you would get traumatic brain injury if you have it or you do not have it. There's actually tests for that.
Starting point is 01:14:51 Alzheimer's disease. Yeah, early onset Alzheimer's. Yeah, there's a test you can take to see if you're more susceptible to CT than others. Yeah, here it is. It says there are three types of APOE genes called alleles. APOE 2, E3, and E4. Everyone has two copies of the gene in the combination of the terms your APO genotype. The E2 allele.
Starting point is 01:15:15 I hope I'm not fucking that up. Probably am. You might as well speak in fucking Hebrew. L-L-E-L-E. Right? Is the rarest form of the APOE and carrying some one copy appears to reduce the risk of developing Alzheimer's by up to 40%. Whoa. APOE 3 is the most common allele and doesn't seem to influence risk.
Starting point is 01:15:32 The APOE 4 allele. I know I'm fucking that word up. Someone's screaming at their phone right now. Present in approximately 10 to 15% of people. Increases risk for Alzheimer's and lowers the age of onset. That's what I think they think is connected to traumatic brain injury. I think it was APOE4. Well, whatever gene I got, I've been knocked out so many times, I'm happy as fuck.
Starting point is 01:15:52 Get that one. Whatever that is, get that one. It's made me so much happier. Well, aren't you happy, though, because your life is going great? Don't you think that's a factor? I think there's something to be said for that that people don't. Look, everybody knows that having good friends in your life, having a good relationship, having a family,
Starting point is 01:16:13 and having a career that you're happy with, all those things make you feel good. It's one of the reasons why people strive for them. Don't you think that has an impact on overall happiness? I think with football players and fighters, MMA, boxers, stuff like that, I think one of the advantages I have is I found my passion and I'm pursuing that so I don't you know it keeps me happy and it keeps my brain where I have to be super creative so it's keeping me sharp. I think a lot of athletes and soldiers for that matter they get done with this
Starting point is 01:16:41 high stress, high risk job and they get put in the real world and they can't find their lane and it's PTSD or it's brain trauma, it's CT. Now you're just depressed, man, because you went from being the superstar for doing this high level job to fit in with society now. It's tough. Well, I don't think it's
Starting point is 01:16:59 no, you're not. I think it's both. That's what I'm saying. It's a factor. It's a factor, but there's a lot of physical factors 100% Joe I'm just saying been around blasts 100% 100% that's a legit issue I'm just saying if if people are as fortunate as me to go through this sort of traumatic fighting career and then find a passion your true passion you'd be way better off and I have no advice for that. I don't know what to tell you.
Starting point is 01:17:26 But if you could find something you're into, it's definitely going to help you. I think for everything in life, you know, if you were a dentist, you didn't want to be a dentist anymore, and you really wanted to make paintings, if you could really figure out a way to do that, you'd be happier. Like whatever that thing is. It's just really hard for some people to find a thing. And that's one of the things that I've talked to people about. I don't really know what I want to do with myself.
Starting point is 01:17:48 And then they ask me for advice. I'm like, man, no one told me. It doesn't really work like that. You've got to figure it out. There's literally not a book you can read, no one you can talk to that's going to point you in the right direction. Here's the best piece of advice. Take some action.
Starting point is 01:18:01 Take some action. Do something. If that doesn't work, correct it. Find something else.. Do something. Keep moving. If that doesn't work, correct it. Find something else. But keep moving. Keep moving. When you're sitting at home going, what do I do? That's when it's a problem.
Starting point is 01:18:11 And when you're texting your friends going, hey, got any advice for me? My advice to you is don't ask me for advice. Yeah. Don't DM me. Don't DM me for advice. Get your shit together. Yeah. I don't do that to people.
Starting point is 01:18:20 I don't call people up and say, hey, man, what should I do? I just do things. That's correct. Just go do something. Agree. And it might not be the thing. You might say, okay, well, now I know I don't call people up and say hey man what should i do i just do things correct just go do something agree and it might not be the thing you might say uh okay well now i know i don't want to do that you can try something else don't be afraid to up though i up all the time you gotta go down you gotta take risks you got to people are so scared they want to be in that harbor i want to stay safe keep me under the blanket oh the cushions oh that's normal which is weird because i take risk when it comes to my family my friends even with brian ortega i'm like don't do this don't
Starting point is 01:18:51 do that i'm super like but with myself i'm pretty reckless but with them i'm like no no no wait please wait yeah it's strange what do you think of stipe and dc i think it's literally the greatest super fight the ufc's ever made i'm so excited for it it's an the greatest super fight the UFC's ever made. I'm so excited for it. It's an amazing fight. When you see how well DC handled Volkan and Ozdemir, and you see what Stipe did to Francis, it almost makes sense. While John is out, and Brock is busy throwing his piss into a microwave.
Starting point is 01:19:20 He's got that same pump system that I use out there on my float tank. He pinches into that thing. They strain that bitch. He's got the same pump system that I use out there my float They strain that bitch and it The reason why it's a super fight too is cuz how tough is this car this fight to break down like you if someone's like I'm Positive steep is gonna win like no you're not I'm positive DC's gonna take him down No, you're not and the thing is it's like well now DC's find a heavyweight. Yeah, he's undefeated heavyweight The more if I can fight at heavyweight, he's like, well, now DC's fighting at heavyweight. Yeah, he's undefeated at heavyweight. The motherfucker can fight at heavyweight. He's actually one of the best heavyweights of all time. Imagine if one day we see Nowitzki's wearing all
Starting point is 01:19:49 diamonds and shit. Just balling out of control. That was what I would do, Faust Nowitzki. If the day Brock Lesnar gets in the UFC, I will show up in a full fur coat with a giant diamond-encrusted cross. Pimpin', pimpin', pimpin'.
Starting point is 01:20:05 Diamonds on every finger. Gucci sunglasses indoors. And just sit there. Nobody told me you had a dress. What's up, son? Just sit there like you got paid. We did it. Another one.
Starting point is 01:20:18 We were just sitting cage side. Imagine if just like that's the way to do it so everybody knows. Like super obvious. If you have to bet on a Joe John Jones Brock Lesnar the fights happening, huh? Boy, I hope so. I Hope so. I think it's happening. If I was Brock, I wouldn't take that fight. Really? No get a fight under your belt first No, we don't have time for that bullshit. There's no warm-ups as Brock Lesnar. Who are you going to fight warm-up?
Starting point is 01:20:46 Francis. Francis. Oh, Jesus. What do you want to do to the poor man? Francis or Brock? Brock. If I'm Brock, excuse me, sir, I'm blast doubling like I'm at fucking Minnesota U right through that gentleman. Or, in the first round, Francis is superhuman freak strong, and you've got to wear him out before you can take him down.
Starting point is 01:21:07 But you have to stay conscious long enough to wear him out before you take him down. And he's throwing nuclear Putin-style missiles at your fucking head. And when they land, you're going to see sparks that's going to remind you of Alistair Overeem, and you're going to go, holy fuck, we're going out here. If you play that game, if I'm Brock Lesnar, I am blasted. I'm coming in with a singlet on. I'm blasted when I'm with you, Francis. Brock is older. He'd be the best wrestler that Francis ever faced.
Starting point is 01:21:36 Who's that? Stephen? It'd be Brock. No, Brock's the best wrestler. I thought you'd say he beat the best wrestler. No, no, I'm saying it'd be the best wrestler that Francis ever fought. Oh, yeah. That's a problem. Oh, yeah, I'm saying he'd be the best wrestler that Francis ever fought. Oh, yeah. That's a problem.
Starting point is 01:21:45 Oh, yeah, for sure. He's also ginormous. Right, but he doesn't have the stand-up acumen that Stipe does. Like, Brock is just not as good in the stand-up. We don't need any of that, sir. You definitely need a little. Nah. You're going to need a little.
Starting point is 01:21:57 Nah. Look what Alistair did. Alistair kept him off. Remember that? For a hot second, then Alistair wanted to play the Rock'em Sock'em Robots and got flatlined. No, no. When Alistair kept him off remember that for a hot second then alistair wanted to play the rock'em sock'em robots and got flatlined no no when alistair beat up oh god we're talking about two different animals though jesus christ sir that how dare you talk about uber ream i'm talking about the uber bro don't we it was a moment in time when you and i get together we're just fucking my mouth salivates we talk about uber it was a moment in time a special moment he was the
Starting point is 01:22:24 scariest man on earth yeah there was he was it time a special moment. He was the scariest man on earth Yeah, there was he was it was a weird moment. It was like wait a minute. What this is real How is that guy that big I was fighting that to it? I feel like this is a bad idea Well, not only call his doctor he had already won the k1 Grand Prix. You won the Strikeforce title He's done smash Brett Rogers I mean he was he was just beating the fuck out of people, man. Brock was like, what in the world am I doing? It was a terrible fight for Brock.
Starting point is 01:22:48 The awful fight. The man would take down the fence. World-class striking. Wicked striking. Like, it was a different kind of striking. It's, like, much more technical. Fucking juice city. Like, we're in fucking Pumpin' Iron.
Starting point is 01:22:59 Ooh, like you're in fucking, what's the juice place? Jamba Juice. Jamba Juice. Like, it's a fucking Jamba Juice. But he doesn't punch as hard as Francis. fucking, what's the juice place? Jamba Juice. Jamba Juice. Like it's a fucking Jamba Juice. But he doesn't punch as hard as Francis. That's Ubering. Back then he did. Jesus Louises. No, I don't think so.
Starting point is 01:23:13 I don't know, man. He's more technical. Very hard. Much more technical. But I think Francis has got some new things. He has some power. Yeah, new levels. The way Francis punches you is like it's a different level. No, Francis is a complete nightmare.
Starting point is 01:23:30 However, Brock Lesnar would be an awful matchup for him. True. It's true. But I feel like you got two giant money makers there. That's what I'm saying. I don't know if you do that right away. We try to make money or not. Yeah, but if Brock loses, that's a wrap.
Starting point is 01:23:44 If he loses to Francis, he loses in a most terrifying way. it's not like he's going on a 10-year run here we're just trying to get our money whoa look at before and after that's crazy jesus christ 2009 to 2016 whoa that's amazing testosterone is real people that's more testosterone that's that that's that jamba but not having it's real too for sure For sure. Yeah. Tough mentally, too. Yeah, there's not much you can do, either. The other thing about it is, like, once your body doesn't produce anymore and you're in your late 30s like that and you've been juicing for a long time. There's, like, Clomid and stuff that tries to— It's illegal.
Starting point is 01:24:17 HCT or HTC? Mm-hmm. That's a cell phone. Either way. HCG or something like that? Whatever it is. It's supposed to boost your testosterone naturally, but never to the levels when you're injecting that Jamba Juice. No, not only that, though.
Starting point is 01:24:29 You can't take that stuff. It's illegal. Not in the UFC. Right. It's illegal. Just saying when, yeah, that's true. I guess when he retires, he can do whatever the fuck he wants. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:24:38 Yeah, when he retires. Or goes to Rizin. Can you imagine? If the UFC lets him out of the contract, and then all of a sudden he disappears for like eight months, and just we hear, just locked in the house with horse meat. Just filet of horse all day. He's eating that Canelo meat. And goes back to deadlifting and hanging out with powerlifters.
Starting point is 01:25:00 Steps out of the fucking house in Holland six months later. Dick tied around his leg. $297. Yes. Yes. Dude, I want that journey for him. I want that because I went on board of that train. steps out of the fucking house in holland six months later dick tied around 297 yes yeah i want that journey for him i want that because i went on board of that train it's only one way it can happen dude how about canela testing hot for fucking clembutrol and they're saying it's in the meat in mexico it is it's a small trace amount and everyone's like oh the fight's off trust me it's boxing that fight is not off there's way too much money involved that is a real fact though is that one particular substance he tested positive for exists in meat clenbuterol and also
Starting point is 01:25:30 it's not like a straight steroid it's it's you know guys use it to cut weight stuff like that and it's such a small trace amount they're gonna be fine yeah that's such a great fight triple g canola man it's a very good fight and it's gonna be better than the first one single demise why do you think it's gonna be better because i I think Triple G didn't fight like himself. He has that mix-in style. He's a little reserved. And then Canelo is moving too much. I think now we're getting the real fight now.
Starting point is 01:25:55 I don't think the judges fucked this one up. You never know, though. It's shady. I fucking loved the first fight. I loved it. I loved it, too. I thought Triple G won it going away, though. I really thought he won. Me, too. I think a G won it going away, though. I really thought he won.
Starting point is 01:26:06 Me, too. I think a lot of people did. Yeah. A lot of people thought that was a poor draw. That's why I think Triple G coming off that draw now, there's a lot more hype with it. Everyone's going to tune in. The ratings are going to be better. But boxing judges, they're crooked.
Starting point is 01:26:19 MMA's nowhere near as bad. Did you see the Wilder-Ortiz fight? No. I thought for sure Wilder was losing on the cards. I'm like, he's going to have to get a finish. But on the actual scorecards, they had Wilder winning, which obviously they want Wilder to win. Right. Which I thought was, I was like, I didn't.
Starting point is 01:26:34 And I'm a Wilder dick rider. I'm like, he's not winning that fight. I think MMA might be worse, and they're the same exact judges. Same judges. There's a lot of the same judges that judge MMA that also, or judge boxing and also judge MMA. And they don't even know what MMA is. How about you and DC trying to walk that tightrope of not clowning?
Starting point is 01:26:53 What's her name? Adeline Bird. Adeline Bird. She's a very nice lady. But as you said, so is my mom. I don't want her fucking. That's exactly what I've meant.
Starting point is 01:27:01 Judging. That's exactly what I said. So funny. You and DC just trying to balance that She has no business being in there She's a very nice lady But yeah she's made some bad decisions And she also was a part
Starting point is 01:27:12 She was also a part of the Canelo Alvarez Triple G decision That's the problem She's balling Yeah and she was on the wrong side of a couple decisions that night There were some bad ones Some that were like what? How did he win every round? Yeah, and she was on the wrong side of a couple decisions that night. There were some bad ones, man. Super suspect, too. Some that were like, what?
Starting point is 01:27:26 How did he win every round? What? Like, it didn't make any sense. Like, some that literally didn't make any sense. You're talking about in the UFC? Yeah, this past weekend. There was a lot of bad decisions. There were some bad ones, yeah.
Starting point is 01:27:37 But there was like a couple of split decisions that I was like, what in the actual fuck is this? And the way it screws over the fighter. The repercussions are such a shitty deal. Yep. Yeah, they lose half their money. Hell yeah. You just cost me half my money because you don't know what's going on. And literally, there's no recourse.
Starting point is 01:27:53 And if it's a bad decision and there's three people, and one person just has literally no idea what they're doing, and they give it to the wrong person. It's awful, man. It's fucking terrible, and it's unnecessary. Here's the thing. It's unnecessary. There's way better methods and one of the
Starting point is 01:28:05 most better methods is, one of the better methods is hire someone who is an actual martial arts expert like a Matt Hume or someone like that. Someone to score like you can, I'm sure there's a lot of those guys that would do it. A lot of trainers out there that would do it. I think I agree. You need to have someone who specializes in mixed martial arts
Starting point is 01:28:21 who's been around the game. They don't need to be cage side because cage side you can't see everything and you're also swayed by the crowd they need to be in an undisclosed location and they're watching what we see and judging the fight from an mma fighter's perspective i think that's a good point and i also think they should be able to see all the replays yes they should see all the fight stats they get everything get everything copy strikes and then decide yep but what you're doing now is so old school the only thing that i would disagree with, I don't think they should hear the commentary
Starting point is 01:28:46 because I think the commentary can sway them. That's what I'm saying. No commentary, no crowd noise. You have three expert MMA analysts watching going, this is who's winning. Because they know the ground game. For Tony Furs and Khabib, let's say Khabib takes Tony down
Starting point is 01:28:59 and they think, oh, he has a huge advantage. And then Tony's just whooping his ass from his back, elbows, submission game, stand back up, getting taken down. But on the ground, Khab he has a huge advantage. And then Tony's just whooping his ass from his back, elbows, submission game, stand back up, getting taken down, but on the ground could be constantly under threat. How are you going to judge that? Yeah, you've got to know what you're looking at. I also think three is too small. I think it should be ten people.
Starting point is 01:29:16 Ten people. There's a lot of people who qualify. Have them call in. It's a real shit show. Call in. Do it all with the internet. You don't even have to be in the building. Why even have to be there?
Starting point is 01:29:26 10, though? Yeah, 10 people. It's hard enough with three morons. Yeah, but if there's two that are smart and one that's bad, you got a shitty split decision and everybody feels weird about it. Like, what would have happened if there was three morons there? So can we say five? Ten.
Starting point is 01:29:37 Ten. Ten, you're going to get the right decision almost every time. Because ten, a few people are going to disagree, but most people are going to see it that way. The majority is going to see it this way and agree and if it's five to five you got a fucking draw on your hands and that's rare i'm not mad i'm not mad at that and i think sometimes a fight should be a fucking draw i don't have a problem with the draw sometimes watch i go man that's too close call don't fuck over someone getting half their pay if there's a draw they both get their win exactly that's how we should do exactly one guy moves on and the other guy doesn't just
Starting point is 01:30:04 arbitrarily so weird it doesn't just arbitrarily. So weird. It doesn't make any sense. Or you get a draw and they have to, in their contract, they rematch on whatever card they're ready to go again. You do it again. I got to call on the fucking address here. I'm sure he's texting me.
Starting point is 01:30:16 There it is. Oh, you fucked up. You know Callan's 75 minutes away. He said he found it. He says he's close. Is he? I don't believe that. He might be.
Starting point is 01:30:24 He could be. Brian Callen. Brian the Kid Callen. So what else is going on? UFC-wise, what's happening? What other big fights are there? Dude, when Yoel Romero comes in and talks to Joey Diaz and me, he's getting ready to fight Whitaker.
Starting point is 01:30:42 He's going to fight for the title. Even though he didn't make weight in the Rockhold fight. That's short notice. I don't hold that against him, though, especially with his body type. God, he looked good against Rockhold, huh? Rockhold said he was made out of metal. Said the guy was just ridiculously strong.
Starting point is 01:30:57 Tough fight for Rockhold. For anybody. For anyone, unless you're Robert Whitaker. Yeah, and Whitaker with healthy knees, man. Whitaker's a nice man. Yeah, he's going to be tough to beat for a long time. But if someone could do it, it could be Yoel. Yoel is not young.
Starting point is 01:31:10 40 years old, son. Every bit of it. Yeah. Who knows? Those Cuban birth certificates. You have no idea. That's what I was saying with Ortiz. They said, oh, he's 38.
Starting point is 01:31:19 I went, bullshit. That's the most shot out 38-year-old I've ever seen. That man has 400 amateur fights in Cuba. There's no way he's 38. Motherfucker's 48. You think so? Not 38. There's no way.
Starting point is 01:31:30 You see him up close. I'm like, what the fuck? Did you see him up close? Yeah. I was at the press, the weigh-ins, all that stuff for Showtime. Did you see the fight live or did you see it on TV? No, I flew back. I was supposed to work it, but I flew back.
Starting point is 01:31:43 I watched Kovalev beat up his friend Beat the piss out of his friend It was like his friend It was like the guy was fighting him like he was his friend And Kovalev was fighting him like some guy fucked his girlfriend in the ass Kovalev killed a guy Yeah it didn't seem to bother him He's a bad motherfucker
Starting point is 01:31:58 But now with that Wilder Ortiz fight It kind of did what I think for Wilder What Anthony Joshua Against Klitschko, where now everyone's talking around. So now before we didn't think we'd get Anthony Joshua-Wilder, but I think it forces Joshua's hand to fight Wilder before it wasn't going to happen, which that's the fight, man. Why wasn't it going to happen before? So Anthony Joshua has to get through Joseph Parker first early next month, which is a beast. Joseph Parker is a nightmare from New Zealand. I think 20-0 world champion.
Starting point is 01:32:28 No punks. He has to get by that. Then he's going to take one or two more fights before he fought Wilder. Now he can't do that. Because Wilder just won by emphatic not- Yeah. It's like, what are you talking about? Obviously, I'm not talking about boxing right now.
Starting point is 01:32:39 You have to take this fight. Why do they put fights like that off? Why do they say we'll take a couple more fights? That's boxing. Well, listen, as a business, if you're Anthony Joshua's manager, it fights like that off? Why do they say we'll take a couple more fights? That's boxing. Listen, as a business, if you're Anthony Joshua's manager, it's like, do we fight Dante Wilder, who's 40-0, 39 knockouts? It's a nightmare of a fight
Starting point is 01:32:51 for anybody, which we're probably favored still to fight. Or do we fight this guy, this guy, and get paid and then fight Wilder? Things could go wrong. Exactly. With Joseph Parker. Joseph Parker's no joke. Not at all. No. But yeah, things could go wrong. Exactly. With Joseph Parker. Joseph Parker's no joke. Not at all.
Starting point is 01:33:06 No. But, yeah, things could go wrong. But I'm assuming that's their way of thinking, you know? But it's scary. I was jumping around. Obviously, being around these guys, I get close with guys. I know Wilder. I wanted to win so bad just because it's good for the sport.
Starting point is 01:33:23 It's not knocking Ortiz. Ortiz is an amazing fighter. But Wilder, he checks all the box man he can he can sell tickets he's american he's you know he talks a lot of he has a great story started boxing because his daughter was born with a spinal issue and couldn't walk and he just has these great stories and you want you root for that dress as well dress as well dime piece yeah knockout artists artist. But him and Joshua's the fight, man. Yeah. He has won his last couple of fights pretty spectacularly, too. People are so funny.
Starting point is 01:33:53 They get so mad at me. They go, oh, my God. Oh, you're such a homer. You love Wilder. I'm like, well, I like Joshua, too. They're like, you used to root for Joshua. I like both of them, man. You can't respond to those people.
Starting point is 01:34:04 I don't respond. But you can't even right now you're responding. Well used to root for Joshua. I like both of them, man. You can't respond to those people. I don't respond. But you can't even right now you're responding. Well, it's my job. You know, we do that thing kind of, yeah. You know, I like both of those guys, man. I love both of them. You can like both of them. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:34:15 This one, Ferguson, Tony Ferguson got mad that I put Khabib's hat on. Hey, Tony. He's like, bro, I thought we were tall, 10th planet. I'm like, look. Hey, bro. I'm wearing the hat. The guy gives me the hat, I'm wearing it. I like Khabib. Hey, bro. I'm wearing the hat. The guy gives me the hat. I'm wearing it.
Starting point is 01:34:26 I like Khabib. I like Tony. Yeah. I like Ortega. I like Frankie Edgar. I want to see you guys fight. I think it would be awesome. There's going to be animosity.
Starting point is 01:34:33 No doubt. If someone doesn't make weight or get hurt in that fight, I'm going to cry. Yeah. Every day when I check Tony's Instagram or check Khabib's, I'm like, please. Just be cool, bros. Please, no injuries. Just be cool. Please, no injuries. Everybody keep it together. Just get there. Don't do anything crazy. Just be cool, bros. Please, no injuries. Just be cool. Please, no injuries.
Starting point is 01:34:45 Everybody keep it together. Just get there. Don't do anything crazy. Just get there. We're not even a month away. Not even a month away. Yeah. That's a fight.
Starting point is 01:34:53 Yeah, what is the date? It's March 6th. It's a month and a day. Four weeks. A month and a day. Good googly moogly. That fight is by far my favorite. The fight has to happen.
Starting point is 01:35:05 It has to happen. Ferguson, Khabib, and then Stipe, DC. Those are my two fights where I'm literally like a schoolboy. Look at that fucking card. Chiesa versus Pettis. I forgot about that. Al Iaquinta versus Paul Felder. Are you fucking shitting me?
Starting point is 01:35:21 Dude. Ioana. Dude. Rose. You got Joe Loa's one's on yoana and rose oh my goodness god damn evan dunham's still doing the damn thing and they gave him that monster yeah tyson off well they couldn't get no one trying to fight tyson they couldn't get marabek tyson off uh a good fight for a long time. He's very, very underrated. People are terrified of that gentleman. Yeah, and he's having a real hard time getting matchups, but Evan Dunham doesn't give a fuck.
Starting point is 01:35:50 I bet you anything your boy Conor's there because his boy Artem Lobov's fighting, and Ferguson Khabib makes sense. Yeah, Lobov's fighting Caceres. That should be fun. I'm a Lobov fan, man. It's a tough dude. Salty record at 14-14, but that's life. It's a tough dude.
Starting point is 01:36:03 Salty record at 14-14, but that's life. Yeah. It's interesting because there's two schools of thought with him and Conor. Is that he's strong and he's powerful and he's a good sparring partner for Conor. But I've also heard people say, no, Conor likes him because Conor can fuck him up. And Conor spars him and just lights him up. Yeah, so goddamn tough. Like having a really tough sparring partner is's probably a great idea you know both yeah he's not exactly a technician but he's Artem so damn tough it's hard to he hits
Starting point is 01:36:32 hard he's a you gotta watch your P's and Q's at all times I'm sure he's a great training partner when he's loyal to he's not gonna hurt you that's super important oh yeah especially now in Connors life that's gotta be real important you know I mean how many people are just constantly trying to get the best of him and sparring? Hashtag no new friends. There's no new guy sparring with him. I was looking at this dude, Katoro, on K1 here. I'm going to send it to you, Jamie.
Starting point is 01:36:59 These dudes, they were doing the exact kind of sparring that I fucking hate to see anyone do where they were literally just going after each other. Trying to knock each other out. And then Kitaru connected with a giant bomb. And knocked him out? Yes, he did. It was awful. That's that old school fighting, man.
Starting point is 01:37:19 I'm going to send this to you, Jamie. Hang on a second. Super old school fighting. Well, it's just, it's unfortunate when people choose to train like this because this is a real knockout that this guy suffered, and it wasn't an accident. Like, this guy was teeing off on him trying to knock him out.
Starting point is 01:37:35 I just sent it to you in a text message. It's not like the guy was knocked out because, you know, he just got caught with a freak punch or a freak elbow and sparring. Watch this shit. Look at those guys in the back. Look at this. Look at this. Oh, they're playing for keeps.
Starting point is 01:37:52 And then walks away. Like he doesn't give a fuck. That's so weird, man. KO'd that dude. You don't get anything out of it. Look at this. That guy doesn't look very good who he's fighting. No.
Starting point is 01:38:03 No, he doesn't. And, I mean, he is swinging from the hips. Oh, that dude's like's fighting. No, he doesn't. He is swinging from the hips. That dude's KO'd. Yeah, he's flatline. Yeah. How do you say his last name? You're talking to me? I'm the worst at asking that. How do you think you'd say it?
Starting point is 01:38:18 Katera! K-A-R-U. Katera. And then he posted that? Yep. Takeru. Takeru. T-A-K-E-R-U. Takeru. Yeah, and then he posted that? Yep. It's awful, right? It's just a tool move.
Starting point is 01:38:32 It's awful. Well, it's just, maybe it wasn't him sparring. I don't know who was getting KO'd like that. But that should be an example of just what not to do. Are you Vanley Silva from Shootbox back in fucking 97? What are you doing does it show the translation yeah who cares either way either way don't post that that's how it used to be that's how guys just spar got back in the day like for sure educate yourself i know that's why when you see something like that today it's hard to see now that's not it's not smart it's not good
Starting point is 01:38:58 for you and it's not a good way to train you're not learning from that you're also going to break all your toys so people go oh you fight like that no that? No, we're good, man. We're good. Or you have to be a guy who can hang in there in that gym and do that, but all of you are going to take unnecessary damage. Can you do it? Yeah, you can do it. That's how we used to do it. You can do it, but is it smart to do it? Definitely not. That's not the right way to do it.
Starting point is 01:39:18 Especially at his level. We know you're tough, man. You don't need to knock guys out. He's fine in K-1. What are you doing? Did you watch Glory this past weekend? I'm not huge into Glory, man. You don't need to knock guys out or get knocked out. He's fine in K-1. What are you doing? Did you watch Glory this past weekend? I'm not huge into Glory, Joe. I watch all comments. Who are you? I know.
Starting point is 01:39:32 I know. You don't like kickboxing? It's all right to me. I enjoy it. I appreciate the art, stuff like that. But I was really into K-1 when it was in its prime. But it's hard for me to get into Glory. And there's some amazing guys in there.
Starting point is 01:39:44 I only have so much time on my hands where Glory is not priority. when it was in its prime, but it's hard for me to get into Glory. And there's some amazing guys in there. I only have so much time on my hands where Glory's not priority. Yeah, I don't know. To me, I like it better than boxing. How dare you? I'm sorry. It's like I don't even know you. Being honest.
Starting point is 01:39:55 I appreciate it. A real good Glory fight to me is more interesting than a real good boxing match. You're fucking crazy. I like kicks. You're crazy. I like knees. I like Muay Thai even more.
Starting point is 01:40:04 More than boxing. Yep. A good boxing match. Yeah. You'd rather watch I like knees. I like Muay Thai even more. More than boxing. Yep. A good boxing match. Yeah. You'd rather watch that than Canelo Triple G. You got your goddamn mind. Well, that's an exceptional once-in-a-lifetime match. You know.
Starting point is 01:40:14 That Wild Ortiz fight, man, one of the best I've ever seen. But, like, say if it was, like, Buakaw versus San Chai. Yeah. I would be just as excited about that. Yeah, that's fair. You know what I mean? Like, those twoai. Yeah. I would be just as excited about that. Yeah, that's fair. You know what I mean? Like those two levels. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:40:29 That level. Yeah, not so extreme. That's a crazy fight. Yeah. You'd want to see what happens. Yeah, I don't know. I just, again, I can appreciate them when there's a good fight. I'm down, but I'm not going to shut down my night and order pizza and watch a glory.
Starting point is 01:40:43 Damn, I will. I will, for sure. But yeah. But I don't miss, which is weird, which I don't miss any MMA, UFC, Bellator. I don't miss any boxing. They've got to shut everything down. Did you get excited about the Kovalev fight? No, I get excited about it.
Starting point is 01:40:59 Anytime, yeah. Super excited about it. Yeah. Like this past weekend, I was just so happy because I knew I had freaking Showtime boxing on with Wilder versus Ortiz, which is a great fight. And then you also had UFC 222. And that ended before the co-main event, so I get to see all of it.
Starting point is 01:41:17 That makes my weekend, man. Did you see that dude, Alexander Hernandez, starch, Benil Darius? God, did he ever. Darius has hit a rough patch. How about your boy Hector? Cuckoosh. Yeah, Hector Lombard, that wasn't good. Where are you at on that? Cheap shot. Cheap shot, you think? Yeah. You don't think it was an
Starting point is 01:41:36 after-reactions combo? The first punch you can get away with. I agree. The second punch, he knows the bell's already rung. Yep, the first one, I said, you're in motion, but that second one that knocked him out, that's where I got to draw the line. Yeah. I don't think he's a bad guy,
Starting point is 01:41:48 but it's also a natural counter to kick like that, to throw that straight right with the left hook. So maybe there's that, but you can't have the fight carry on. Well, he definitely naturally fired back, but he knew in his head that the bell had rung, and he fired back anyway. I mean, that's what happened. Why did he do it?
Starting point is 01:42:05 I don't know. But here's the thing. We can't speculate. We don't know. No one knows it was on purpose. All you know is the bell rang. Rules are rules. The rule's real clear.
Starting point is 01:42:14 The bell rings, the dude throws a punch, and then another punch after the bell. 100% foul. There's no gray area. Like, they're going to appeal that. To me, it's crazy. And Hector was saying something like the guy was talking. He was fine. He was saying, what happened?
Starting point is 01:42:28 Where am I? That's what C.B. Dollar was saying. Yeah. He said it over. I kept saying that he was saying. I was letting everybody know because he was saying it over and over again. And we all know what that is. We've all seen that.
Starting point is 01:42:40 When a guy gets knocked out and just keeps saying, what happened? It's a nightmare. It happens so often. Yes. That is what always happens when people get KO'd. They go, just keeps saying, what happened? It's a nightmare. It happens so often. That is what always happens when people get KO'd. They go, oh shit, what happened? You don't remember anything. And you tell them, and then five minutes later, what happened? And then you tell them, why am I here?
Starting point is 01:42:55 What happened? They forget over and over again all night. You've got to stay up with them. Hector's in a tough spot because he's lost five in a row now. So I'm not sure what they're going to do with him. Well, I mean, I would imagine if CB wants to do a rematch, they five in a row now. So I'm not sure what they're going to do with him. Well, I mean, I would imagine if CB wants to do a rematch, they would do a rematch.
Starting point is 01:43:09 Because there would be some interest in that fight. Because either one of those guys is not generating a ton of interest. Correct. Hector's lost a lot of fights. CB's lost two? He got knocked down by Marquardt. Remember that? Yeah, that was bad. And that was, it seemed to me like one of those fights where he thought Marquardt was done.
Starting point is 01:43:29 The last thing to go. You know Nate retired. Yeah. Yeah, officially retired, yeah. I'm glad. I'm glad he retired. But there's a thing that happens to fighters where, you know, they just can't take a shot anymore. They've just been doing it too long.
Starting point is 01:43:42 It's just a fact. And so guys go after him. But the last thing to go with a guy like Nate is power. Yes, he knocks out CB after CB You know CB came back and who did he beat? I thought CB won two in a row and then they got Hector Did he lose it one in decision, but I'm pretty sure after Nate he won one Well, you know he got fucked up in an elevator accident. He's in a lawsuit with the UFC over it
Starting point is 01:44:03 Yeah, he's like permanently fucked up. Is he? It's that bad? What happened? He was on an elevator and it just dropped. The elevator just dropped and slammed onto the bottom. I'm sorry, how's that the UFC's problem? I don't think he's in a lawsuit with the UFC.
Starting point is 01:44:17 Is he not? Am I crazy? He's in a lawsuit, I think, with the hotel. I thought it was with the UFC. Maybe I'm wrong. It doesn't make sense if it's the elevator. Then I have misinformation. Yeah. Because it wouldn't make sense to come after the UFC if it was at the UFC. Maybe I'm wrong. It doesn't make sense if it's the elevator. Then I have misinformation. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:44:26 Because it wouldn't make sense to come after the UFC if it was the hotel elevator. Oh, you didn't know that it was the elevator accident? I knew it was the elevator. So, yeah, it doesn't make sense if he would come after the UFC. No. He would come after the UFC. That's what I heard. But apparently there was quite a few people in that elevator.
Starting point is 01:44:39 And when he dropped, a lot of them got fucked up. Damn. I think it was more than three or four people in the elevator. But he got fucked up bad. Was it a Steve Wynn hotel? I don't Damn. I think it was like more than three or four people in the elevator, but he got fucked up bad. Was it a Steve Wynn hotel or what? I don't know. I don't know who owned it.
Starting point is 01:44:49 I don't know where it was. I do not remember. That's such a shame. Jamie, are you looking it up? I hope he gets paid out the ass for that, though. Yeah, but he did go and fight again, so they would probably be arguing like, hey, you're still professionally competing in a cage fight. That's what I was going to say, because he's in that lawsuit, and then you fight this weekend.
Starting point is 01:45:04 The courtroom's going to be like, hold up. You're saying your back is an issue and they fought Hector Lombard? Yeah. What are you talking about? Yeah, that's true. The best argument would be do not fight until the lawsuit is settled. And then shoot some stem cells down in Panama. Yeah, it's not like we're dying to see you versus Hector on the headphones.
Starting point is 01:45:21 Panama. There's a Wyndham Hotel in Cleveland. Ah, Wyndhams. Don't stay at Wyndhams. Yeah, or do. So they'll sue the shit out of those people. We'll see what happens. But yeah, the elevator apparently was getting funky
Starting point is 01:45:34 on people before, and people were still riding it. Don't more people die in elevators because when they're talking to their friend, they assume the elevator's there, and they're walking, the elevator's not there, and they go down? More people die like that than you when they're talking to their friend, they assume the elevator's there and they're walking and the elevator's not there and they go down? More people die like that than you would imagine.
Starting point is 01:45:48 Why is the door open? Because something's wrong. It goes ding and they're like, yeah, I got it. And they fall to their death. It's a bad one. So always look at the elevators there. That's a fucked up way to end it. Shitty deal.
Starting point is 01:46:03 You don't want to go out like that no i'd heard a story about a dude who got trapped in an elevator the elevator went up and he was trapped in the door and the elevator went up and just sheared him in half oh yeah i saw that in final destination too maybe that's what it was yeah i made it up now i'm pretty sure it was real that'd be a terrible way to go. Awful. Well, it's like that actor who was in Star Trek and he was in Alpha Dog. He lived right up here, man, in Hollywood, Hollywood Hills. He lives on an incline, and he was getting out of his Jeep to close the garage door, and he didn't put the Jeep in park, and it rolled over him and killed him. Trapped him against the garage door.
Starting point is 01:46:44 Fuck. Young actor, too. Ph against the garage door. Fuck. Young actor, too. Phenomenal actor. Fuck. Wow. Back straddled in the elevator, one leg in the elevator, one leg in the second floor. He was helping the occupants get off the elevator when all of a sudden it shot upwards, beheading him. That's it.
Starting point is 01:47:00 His body fell into the second floor lobby. His head fell onto the floor of the elevator. His head and the two remaining passengers in the elevator shot up to the ninth floor. One of the passengers described the scene. I can't get it out of my mind. The head was there, but the body wasn't. He still had the Walkman earphones on his head. Holy shit.
Starting point is 01:47:19 There had been many problems with the elevator, and the service repairman was at the building that day to work on it. The elevator had been inspected Novembermber 1st 1994 and passed the inspection that's some darn shit that's a way to go baby not good painless though i guess but you will be awake for a couple seconds yeah don't they say once you like a chicken right that doesn't make sense to me though because how come you're not awake when you get choked out right well because when you when you get decapitated right everything's still firing some of the energy's still up there firing so you can see maybe i heard about that chicken that didn't have any head lived for 18 months
Starting point is 01:47:56 without a noggin after a farm and a failed attempt at slaughter axed off the head but missed the jugular vein we we really we really don, right, when people lose their heads. Chickens are fucking dinosaurs, man. They're straight up dinosaurs. I've said that many, too many times, but that kind of shit is what you need to see. Just realize it's not a person. Although a pterodactyl is not a dinosaur.
Starting point is 01:48:17 It's so strange to me. I know. I think pterodactyls might have had feathers. They don't know. They're thinking now that a lot of dinosaurs had feathers. But when you think about what a pterodactyl is, we always assume
Starting point is 01:48:27 it had like bat wings. But now that they think that dinosaurs have feathers, I wonder if they... A giant bird? Yeah, I wonder if they've decided to look into that and look at it
Starting point is 01:48:37 as a possibility. You ever see that giant picture that it's the T-Rex covered in feathers? Yeah. Get that shit out of my face. They didn't look like that, bitch. They might have. No. They think raptors did.rex covered in feathers yeah that shit out of my face they didn't look like that they might have no no t-rex raptors covered feathers like that feathers they look pretty dope too man you've seen the have you seen the pictures jamie that t-rex covered in feathers
Starting point is 01:48:56 yeah that one's furry it looks cute like a big old hamster that one looks cool yeah see um that one we we showed it before. It's at Bozeman. Bozeman Science Museum or some shit in Bozeman, Montana. Pretty cool place. And they have a replica of what they think a raptor could have looked like if it was covered in feathers. Because they think it's very possible that that's what those things looked like. Remember, Jamie, it was on the floor. There was an actual model. We pulled up the image before i mean so if you go to images it's some
Starting point is 01:49:29 science shit for the feathers but that's what they think because um they found some that have feathers they know that they've got some fossils that have like very clear indentations where feathers must have been well then everything i grew up on with dinosaurs is wrong well they think that's true anyway they used to think the t-rex with dinosaurs is wrong well they think that's true anyway they used to think the t-rex was a predator and now they think it's a scavenger i think it's vegetarian yeah no they think he just waddled around just crush like that's why the teeth are so big to crush dead animals that are just laying around that's it right there that's what they think that thing looks like which is kind of even more nightmare that's more freaky big old feathered
Starting point is 01:50:04 lizard that runs and guts you with its claws. My brain's trying to analyze it. It doesn't really work. Well. Because how we know dinosaurs, you know what I'm saying? Yeah, but think of an eagle, man. I mean, eagle is a lot like a fucking dinosaur. It just has a hatchet for a head instead of teeth.
Starting point is 01:50:21 Yeah. But you look at an ostrich, you look at their legs and shit, you can see a dinosaur in and shit you can see dinosaur in it 100 feet yeah but nobody has teeth like that there's not a single bird that has like leopard seal type teeth you know god leper seal an underappreciated animal that thing's mean as fuck one of the coolest animals of all time we're in la jolla and uh we were on these scooters and went down there's all these leopard seals and there's some people taking pictures. Some Asian dude walked up, got nose to nose with this thing. I told my brother, go get your camera out because that thing will rip his face off and this is going to be awesome. Oh, my God. They're fucking killers, man.
Starting point is 01:50:56 They're so big, too. They're leopard. You know what I'm saying? They're leopard seals for a reason, man. You know, I didn't even know they were a real thing until I watched that March of the Penguins movie. I went, what? You didn't know they were real? I didn't know what a fucking leopard seal was.
Starting point is 01:51:10 I never heard of it. Yeah, they're gangster. I think I'm scared because since a kid I was in Mexico and there's one going up in the water. I thought, oh, cute. Look, that's like the ones I see on cartoons. And my dad's friend who's in the Navy was like, do not go in the water. Those things are mean as fuck. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:51:24 I was like, really? He's like, yes. They're out there fucking killing shit right now. Yeah, they've eaten people before. There's one of them. Look at that poor penguin getting his head ripped off. A scientist, actually, a female scientist in a rare attack got killed, I want to say about 10 years ago.
Starting point is 01:51:40 Those things are gangster, man. They're pretty stunned. Because they have giant mouths and huge teeth. But look, like with his mouth closed there, looks so fucking cute. Like, hey buddy. That's what that Asian dude was doing. Nose to nose with his fucking thing. Hi buddy. Now, get me a picture of his teeth, like
Starting point is 01:51:55 right above with his mouth open. Go large on that. That's not even a good one. That thing looks like a tremor. Yeah, right there. Oh, Jesus Christ. They look like tremors. Look at that, man. I mean, that is that doesn't look like a real thing. That looks like a tremor. Yeah, right there. Oh, Jesus Christ. They look like tremors. Look at that, man. I mean, that doesn't look like a real thing. That looks like a fake animal. It looks like the movie Tremor.
Starting point is 01:52:11 Yeah. The shitty CGI Tremor. That's what it looks like. Yeah, there was earthquakes because there was worms living on the ground. That movie's awesome. Shout out to Kevin Bacon. I was thinking this about the Oscars. Go to that one on the lower left.
Starting point is 01:52:22 Look at these fucking teeth. Jesus Christ. See, he looks friendly to me. I would kick it at those teeth bro i'd share a fish talk he's like i'd be really happy to eat your asshole 100 want to take a bite out of your dick 100 man they're fucking killers yeah what are you gonna say about the oscars though oh i was thinking killers no i was thinking like when are we no it's, no one can possibly see all the movies. Because we keep adding to the library. Every week, new movies come out.
Starting point is 01:52:51 They don't take movies away. No, you have to hit a certain period where they're going to preview that movie so you're up for the awards. That's not what I mean. I don't care about the Oscars. I don't care about the awards. I'm just saying the number of movies that we produce as the human race is fucking crazy and it's never ending yes like every year they put out more and movies don't go away so they just the database just stacking and stacking and stacking tough to follow and it's only been
Starting point is 01:53:17 happening for a hundred years yeah i mean and that was silent in the beginning right so there's been a hundred years of these movies just stacking up. And all the premises, like if you think about premises, like, oh, the robots get smart and they want to kill the people. Okay. Oh, the monkeys get smart and they want to kill the people. Okay. Like there's all these premises that just go, oh, there's worms that live on the ground that cause earthquakes. I like it.
Starting point is 01:53:39 Great movie. Like there's so many of these. I'm in immediately. So many, like, like it must be so hard to come up with an original premise for a movie. There's so many of these. I'm in immediately. So many, like, like it's must be so hard to come up with an original premise for a movie. There's so many fucking movies. Like you think it's hard to come up with a new joke or a new premise for a joke? Well,
Starting point is 01:53:52 the way you think movies, what do you think you get? Like a recreation of Jumanji and Rocky and predator, like they're running out of ideas. How many buddy, buddy movies can we see? Can we put the rock Kevin Hart in so many goddamn movies? It's just these regurgitation of all the same shit've already seen yeah yeah it's there's so many movies
Starting point is 01:54:11 yet there's not that many paid actors is there like it's a struggle city less than one percent make a living acting but there's a jigillion movies is it less than one percent less less than one percent make a living really making. Of all actors? Yes. Wow. That's crazy. Like a quality living of all the actors, less than 1%. That's pretty crazy. Crazy. Think how many comics make a legit living?
Starting point is 01:54:34 Think how many comics there are? The difference being that for a comic, it's more up to them. Correct. It's more up to them to go. And you're a good piece of proof of that. Obviously, you have the boost of being famous from the UFC and then being famous from your podcast those two things helped you as a boost But also the hustling yeah, and that's the thing that like an actor can hustle But you have to be hired you got to be hired to do something
Starting point is 01:54:56 There's a million moving pieces million a million you got a track well Yeah, test well people have to like you gotta be right for the Royal You could just go up on a showcase night and do like 15 minutes and kill and you're in the money you know acting's a motherfucker a hard gig to get good at too you know acting yeah i think like god to get good at like daniel day lewis style i was watching there will be blood the other day and i was just thinking like this guy's like the's putting out so many- Yeah, ooh, in New York. What is that?
Starting point is 01:55:27 Gangs in New York? Gangs in New York. But I forgot how good There Will Be Blood was. I watched it the other day in a hotel, and I was near where it happened, because I was doing gigs in Fresno and Bakersfield, and I didn't know that, but that Tehachapi Mountains, that's where there will be bloods all about that's where they were drilling for oil that's right over there amazing movie dude i think it's funny sometimes fighters whoever athletes go i'm gonna go to hollywood
Starting point is 01:55:54 get into acting like man you need to sit in on a class or you need to watch someone do like a dramatic role and see if it's for you man i mean, you're talking about it's a legit craft, man. Some people are just good at this. There's a thing that they're doing where you're compelled by their words. You're compelled by what they're doing. It's not easy to achieve that spot. Not a lot of guys do it. No, it's a true art. That's why it's so tough to get cast in those roles in TV and movies.
Starting point is 01:56:23 There's a reason why it's so goddamn tough. I've been watching that Viking show. You watch that Viking show? That's on History, right? All in, baby. Yeah, you get it on Apple. I got it on iTunes. It's fucking good, man.
Starting point is 01:56:34 It's a good show, and it keeps getting better. And they're really good actors. I'm on season two right now. I need some shows, man. I ran out. You seen Punisher on Netflix? Have not. Changed your life.
Starting point is 01:56:43 That good? You would love it. There's a lot of shoot-em-ups. Hell yeah. Bang, bang, bang. But like legit, I just don't like action. That doesn't do anything for me. Right.
Starting point is 01:56:50 I like a good story. Yeah. Punisher's dope. Went through El Chapo, went through Narcos. You've never seen The Wire. Have you ever seen The Wire? Seen The Wire. Got like season five.
Starting point is 01:57:02 That's all there is. They just did a release in HD, so if you haven't seen it, you could watch it right now. Some people say greatest. It's probably the best series ever. Ever? Yeah. That's a strong statement. Easy for you to say because I haven't seen it, you fuck.
Starting point is 01:57:15 It is true. It is ranked. Some people rank it number one. That and Sopranos, right? I've never seen Sopranos. A lot of people said it's number one. Well, that's a problem. You've never seen Wire, son?
Starting point is 01:57:24 I saw one episode of The Wire. Well, I've seen half an episode of Sopranos. Number one. Well, that's a problem. You've never seen Wire, son. I saw one episode of The Wire. Well, I've seen half an episode of Sopranos. Sopranos was the show that got me into binge watching, but not binge because, you know, I watched it every Sunday whenever it was on or whatever day it was. Yeah, you were excited for it. Yeah, man. It's HBO night with your girl. It was a big deal to sit and watch The Sopranos.
Starting point is 01:57:41 I was like, boy, here we go. The fucking Sopranos. That's how I was with Game of Thrones. Is Brian here? Yeah. He's part white. Like, boy, here we go. The fucking Sopranos. That's how I was with Game of Thrones. Is Brian here? Yeah. He's a car white. Yeah, he is a Tesla. Some poor electric car that he half charges.
Starting point is 01:57:54 How often do you think Brian fully charges that car? He was just in the shop. He like ran into a wall or some shit. He treats his cars like shit. And then he goes, dude, do you think I should get a Porsche like you and Rogan? I'm like, no, absolutely not. That's not the car for you. Why are you saying that to him? He's hitting full-on midlife crisis. Let's encourage it.
Starting point is 01:58:09 No, I want him to get a yellow Viper and braces. I want to be that guy in a shit tan and a wig. Ooh, a Viper. Nah, he doesn't know how to drive enough for a Viper, but he should drive something that has some balls. Yeah, Tesla's bummed me out.
Starting point is 01:58:25 I like the message. It's just not the car for me. It doesn't make any noise. I have a problem with the fact that it doesn't make any noise. It doesn't do anything to me. I'm just too used to noise. Me too. We sound like two cavemen right now.
Starting point is 01:58:35 I know. But it doesn't have that V8 or that V10 noise, the V6, the M6. Brumble. That exhaust. There's nothing And you know what's pissing me off? That lately car manufacturers have been adding noise to their cars Like the Maserati? They put it in the speakers
Starting point is 01:58:53 What? Yes In what cars? BMW M4 does it They put it in the speakers? Yep, sound They pump sound through the speakers
Starting point is 01:59:03 That's a bitch move So as the engine goes up Some of it's coming in through the speakers. It's like patting a bra as a girl. That's fucked up. Apparently some guys have figured out a way how to cut that out. I think. Why would you do that? Turbocharged cars.
Starting point is 01:59:15 Turbocharged car. Can I say that five times fast? Turbocharged. Turbocharged cars. When you have forced induction, forced air induction, it makes the car much quieter. It doesn't sound nearly as throaty and rumbly. Like my GT3, you know how raw that thing sounds? I love that.
Starting point is 01:59:32 Because it's naturally aspirated. Correct. And you also get instantaneous feedback from the throttle response. Pre-jagged GTS. That's what you want. That's what you want. When you get into turbochargers, it's all about turbo lag, which is why they have twin turbos. They have one turbo on the low end, one turbo on the high end. But even at the very best implementations of turbochargers, there's still a perceptible lag.
Starting point is 01:59:52 Slight lag. Slight. They're getting better and better, though. Much better. That new Porsche is ridiculous. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. They're definitely better than they used to be.
Starting point is 02:00:01 Dude, how the fuck have you not been on comedians in cars getting coffee? Oh, I don't know. Not your thing. Nah. I did a Jay Leno show. I've done enough car things. That's true. But let's take that new Porsche and get on there or something.
Starting point is 02:00:13 I can't believe you're new Porsche. Literally, I was like, I hit you about the podcast. I'm just here to see the car, and you didn't bring it. It has an oil leak. I know. Yeah. Well, you buy it. It's not new.
Starting point is 02:00:23 It's 1991. It's new. 1991 964. Something I wanted to fuck around with one of those older cars. I like those. Love it. They're small. They're real small.
Starting point is 02:00:37 That's one of the weird things about it when you're around it. Those things are tiny. A driver's car. Yeah. You feel everything. I love it because you're not going to see it. No one has it out there. It's custom to you. It's a badass ride.
Starting point is 02:00:46 There's more of them now than there have been before. People are getting into those older cars. Thanks to your boy, Magnus Walker. Yeah. Chris Harris said something funny to me. He said, why is it that four years ago I didn't give a shit about 964s? Now I think they're the best looking cars ever. Porsche goes through these phases where this one's cool and this one's 68, 78, 73.
Starting point is 02:01:04 It's just these weird phases well those long hood cars are kind of always the the best looking ones the 19 like 67 to like 70 early 70s like 72 73 you know they have that long hood those are the ones that magnus is really into yeah he's done a few of those where he redid them he made them cool too yeah oh yeah for sure Yeah, he's done a few of those where he redid them. He made them cool, too. Yeah. Oh, yeah, for sure.
Starting point is 02:01:29 Well, his style, that's another level more raw than what I'm dealing with. Magnus? Yeah, because his style, well, he has a 964, too. But a lot of what his older cars were were those 1969, 1971s, and he would redo those. And those cars don't weigh dog shit. They weigh like 2,000 pounds. Super light. He would redo those. And those cars don't weigh dog shit.
Starting point is 02:01:43 They weigh like 2,000 pounds. Super light. The Porsche purists think they're not really into the Singers or the Magnus Walker. You know what I'm saying? Your car is in the middle of that, I think. Yeah, it's not modified. It's not like a Singer, which is completely different. Singer's got a carbon fiber body. I actually think Singers, Porsche took a lawsuit out of them because they're selling the Porsches,
Starting point is 02:02:04 but they're taking the Porsche logo off, put a Singer one on now. Yeah. Which is an issue. Porsche's suing them? Really? They have an issue with it, yeah. That's interesting. I thought they liked it because it was just like bringing back interest in vintage Porsches.
Starting point is 02:02:15 I think they liked it before he started making it the Singer. You know what I'm saying? Yeah, because what he's doing is taking a 964, which is that same year that I'm talking about, and then he puts all this other stuff on it and beefs up the suspension and beefs up the engine. They're like impossible to get to. Yeah. They're so sick.
Starting point is 02:02:30 Well, now he has a new one that starts at $1.5 million. Is that it? Jesus Christ. What the fuck are we doing? Have you seen it? No. There's a limited number of them they're going to make. It has a 500-horsepower naturally aspirated engine. It's a limited number of them they're going to make. It has a 500 horsepower naturally aspirated engine.
Starting point is 02:02:46 It's got giant fender flares. See if you can find it. Say no more, fam. I'm in. You're in. Wait until you take a look at this thing. Sometimes when you send me pictures of cars getting made, sometimes I see it and it makes me mad. They're so sick it makes you mad.
Starting point is 02:03:01 There's not enough cars in the world for me. Yeah, what is it about cars? I don't know. Cars and girls. Like, you see it and you're like, God damn. God damn. Right? It just speaks to DNA.
Starting point is 02:03:11 And it's a, I mean, it's not all men. No. Callan. Callan would come in here. You could show him that. He's here. Where is he? Is he in the dressing room?
Starting point is 02:03:19 I mean, I've had, yeah, he's walking around the gym. See him? I guarantee you he hits that punching thing you have. He's going to break it. He's got karate power. Or he'll go, you know what? I would, I've had, yeah, he's walking around the gym. See him? I guarantee you he hits that punching thing you have. He's going to break it. He's got karate power. Or he'll go, you know what? I would, but my wrist. Yeah, maybe there's that.
Starting point is 02:03:31 But this, I mean, some men don't get into it, but it's so universal with men. It's just, it's so normal that men, like, really get into cars. Why is that? I don't know. I don't know what it is, the battle. Especially V8s, right? But, like, I'm not the type of guy where, like, I'll see a car, and my brother's a super car guy, and I go, that thing, your car's fast enough on the track. I'm like, I don't give a shit about the track, man.
Starting point is 02:03:55 There's guys who are, like, those track guys, and I'm just, like, a road guy, fun-driving car, fast enough, but looks great. I'm about looks and performance. Track is fun. But then a lot of people are track guys. We should go to the track. The Porsche Performance yeah we go there we have to take their cars though fuck up their tires yeah that's true not yours that's true you can get gt3s gt2s yeah all right let's do it let's do that look at that that's the that's the singer yeah come on son that doesn't
Starting point is 02:04:22 make your dick singer pors Porsche 964 DLS. And this thing is insane. Find a better looking car than that, though. You know what I'm saying? Well, I'm going to be honest. Those Fuchs wheels, I always felt like they're not good enough for that body style. I like how deep the... Look how the wheel wells on that.
Starting point is 02:04:39 I always felt like they're classic. Those Fuchs are quite... They have center locking hubs, too. See that? Look at the fucking body on that thing. That thing is filthy. Woo! And the ducktail on the back.
Starting point is 02:04:50 That's the only reason I bought my car, because of the ducktail. Look at the back end. Oh, my God. That might be one of the best looking cars ever. Ever. Ever. What's the interior like on that, Jamie? Oh, it's phenomenal.
Starting point is 02:05:00 It's orange. It's going to be orange, I assume. Look at the center locks, man. And people will say, all bespoke, the interior. Look at that. Oh, God. Jesus Christ. How much is it?
Starting point is 02:05:10 $1.6 million. Makes you want to risk it all. Yeah, right? Sign up for it. If I was Connor, I would do one of them Burger King commercials and buy one of these. Dude, if I were you, I'd get one of these fucking things. That's not my style. That's a little too...
Starting point is 02:05:24 A little too flex on them? My car's lipstick orange, so I'm into it. I got a silver Bronco already. I got that silver Corvette that I have. That's about as... That's your style, though. ...as look at my dick as you can get.
Starting point is 02:05:36 I mean, you got a freaking, you know, that night red fucking Porsche. The classic red. Yeah, it's a guard's red. It's a guard's red, yeah. It's a great color. It's good. You'll see it soon.
Starting point is 02:05:50 What's the matter? He's trying to do dips, but he's not quite doing it. We're watching Callan work out on the security camera. Why doesn't he come in here? Because he's Callan. Let's wrap this up. We'll go get him. All right.
Starting point is 02:06:01 Got any comedy dates coming up? Yes. I'm in Oxnard, Levity Live next week. Great club. Great club. This is all I'm in Oxnard Levity Live next week This is all March Oxnard, Levity Live next week, Friday, Saturday Friday, Saturday That'd be March 16th, 17th, Levity Live, Oxnard And then the following week
Starting point is 02:06:16 I'm in Florida, Tampa the 22nd Palm Beach 23rd and 24th Orlando on the 25th Brendonshop.com TFATK.. And then check out Below the Belt. First episode's out. App Below the Belt. My Showtime show dropped. Powerful Showtime.
Starting point is 02:06:31 Brendonshop. Blowing the fuck up! What's up, brother? We'll be back with Brian Callen.

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