The Joe Rogan Experience - Podcast from a Car

Episode Date: April 10, 2015

This episode is only available as audio. Joe and Bryan Callen recorded a podcast in a car while driving to a recent hunting trip. Bryan Callen is an actor and stand-up comedian. Together with Brendan Schaub he hosts "The Fighter & The Kid" podcast available on Spotify.

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This podcast is the reason why I'm doing this for my iPhone. I did the whole goddamn thing for my iPhone. Brian Callen and I went turkey hunting. We went turkey hunting for Meat Eater, that TV show that I do several times a year. And we drove all the way up to Northern California. It took us about shit, like nine hours because of traffic. It was pretty brutal, but we had a great goddamn time. I have a great time with Brian Callen no matter what I do. He's one of my best friends. I love him like a brother. I've known him for 21 years now.

Yeah, I think. Something like that. It's pretty close. I think I met Brian in 94. We were both little babies. A little bambinos. Somewhere around there. Might be slightly later.

In the neighborhood. Why am I explaining to the day how many years I've known him? About two decades. Let's just say that. And we just always have great fucking times together. We had a great time together last time. We did the meat eater show where we went to Alaska. And it sucked the fat back of dicks.

We were trapped in this goddamn rainforest for five days. sleeping in wet tents, wet sleeping bags, wet clothes. Everything you do is wet because it rains all day, every day. And we still had a great time because I fucking love the dude. We have fun together. And the same was true in this long ride to Northern California. We did it in my car while we were driving. We were talking. We were talking. We were having this really cool conversation.

And I said, fuck, man, let's do a podcast. So we just broke out the iPhone. And I stuck it in the ashtray. And we just talked. So you'll hear engine noise a little bit. You'll hear maybe other road sounds. But that's authentic. So don't expect high quality but we did have a really cool time talking we had a lot of laughs so please enjoy this conversation

with my good buddy brian callan the joe rogan experience train by day joe roan podcast by night, all day. We are on our way. We are on the 101 headed to Northern California to go to Sonoma, the wilds of California wine country to hunt. Shooting turkey. We're going to shoot some turkeys. And then Brian is going to go to Edmonton to do some comedy. And I'm going to keep hunting because I'm fucking crazy. I want to go hunt some pigs.

I want to clip a pig, man. You're lucky you get to clip a pig, bro. I'm taking a pig out, bro. I want to stab it in the heart. I'm not man. Yeah, I'm clipping a pig. You're lucky you get to clip a pig, bro. I'm taking a pig out, bro. I want to stab it in the heart. I'm not really into that. I'm into shooting them. I'm going to blast a turkey.

I have my Upland bird validation. That's a bird license, everybody. Yeah, I've got mine right here, fella. That's hunter talk for my bird validation. We are in traffic, so we were talking, having this wonderful, fascinating conversation. And we said, hey, let's do a fucking podcast. So if you hear honking, that's me. I'm a shitty driver. If you hear a car, this is not stuff we added in post.

This is all we're actually driving. If you hear thank you, thank you, it's because people in other cars are recognizing me and thanking me for all my comedy. It's from The Hangover. That's what it is. They always, and the one thing on Sex and the City. Oh, by the way, I get a call from Todd Phillips, the writer-director of The Hangover, and he says, hey, man, he's kind of apologizing,

and I'm like, what are you apologizing? Are you offering me a part? He goes, yeah, I don't know if you have time. I go, you're Todd Phillips, so I'll play a mushroom in your next movie. Yeah, I have time. And I was like, what's the part? And I'm excited.

I'm playing a Jordanian smuggler, ladies and gentlemen. I guess the same character. So, thank you. The same characters you were in The Hangover? I'm not a very diverse actor, dude. I play the same guy. Was that who you were in The Hangover? I'm going to move the thing to here.

There's my microphone holder. Yes, I was playing a Lebanese guy in one, and I was playing a Jordanian guy in two. I had a wig with the same accent, and now I'll be wearing something on my head. Did you actually say that you were from Lebanon or Jordan? No, but I swear in the hangover, in the first one, I say, which means, your sister is a whore. Yeah, as I get shot when they shoot me. So that's the hint that I'm Arabic.

I saw the first one. I didn't see the second one. I didn't hear good things. I didn't really see all of the second one. I don't watch a lot of what I'm in. That's probably good, right? We were speaking about the Arab world, and you were talking about Islamic fundamentalism.

Yeah, we were talking about people that are... There was this guy on Twitter that I follow that was talking about Sharia law, that divine law is superior to all other laws because it can never be approved upon. So there's no need to ever revise it. And I was like, wow, what kind of crazy thinking is that? Like these guys that were... This guy is an ISIS supporter and this just really radical fundamentalist Islamic cleric and promoting Sharia law. And it's interesting because this guy just tweets.

I don't know if he tweets from like if he texts it in and then doesn't read Twitter because he never responds. But he'll go on these long rants. I don't even know if he's tweeting it, or if someone who works for him tweets it, but all the people in the comments, you know, and the responders to that, there's so many people just shitting all over him, and it doesn't matter. He never

responds to them, never comments. Yeah, he's just putting it out there, but I think that what I was saying is that the obsession with purity, and the obsession with perfecting anything is so human throughout history. And I was just thinking about, for example, the nutrition movement. So there's a book, I believe it's called Clean. And the guy's name is Alejandro Younger.

He's a doctor. I think he was a cardiologist. I like how you say his name. Alejandro Younger. Yeah, he's from Argentina, I think. was a cardiologist. I like how you say his name. Alejandro, Alejandro, Alejandro Lech. Younger. Younger. Yeah, he's from Argentina, I think. Argentina. Argentina?

Yes, Argentina. Is he a gaucho? No, he's a doctor. He's a doctor. He's a very good doctor. He's a very, very smart doctor. He also does salsa and merengue. Salsa?

Salsa. For me, salsa, merengue but salsa salsa for me salsa for me salsa merengue samba is my is my garden

my garden my secret garden so but he wrote a thing about how you can keep your

cells clean by eating a certain way and there's all this junk in your cells yeah and a lot

of nutritionists will always talk about sort of cleaning and unclogging your body resonates with people man i got all this junk i love this toxin man i gotta get the toxins out if you ask them what the toxins are a lot of times they're like well they're just toxins man

bro yeah you don't want to know you gotta sweat you gotta sweat those toxins out what do you mean sweat the toxins out what are the toxins have we ever done a study on what the toxins are you'll never get an answer religion i mean any kind of puritanical sect of religion is always concerned with purifying the body, purifying the soul. The utopian, the end result was a utopian society. Socialism, communism, fascism, totalitarianism, all of those things were the idea of controlling, re-educating the mind, getting rid of the gunk in your mind.

For example, Pol Pot said anybody who wore glasses was an intellectual. They probably should be executed because, well, they've already been corrupted. Let's have re-education camps. Mao Tse-Tung, the great butcher. Mao Tse-Tung was basically a guy who said we have to forcefully re-educate people. The adults, a lot of times, are already past their... We can't fix them. Let's kill them.

And let's take their kids and re-educate them and make a perfect society. Anytime anybody starts talking about that kind of stuff, we can fix, purify, clean up, make a perfect society. Be careful. Because typically, it's led to a lot of death. And that's a thing that people do when they're charlatans and they start talking about health. They start talking about toxins and detoxing,

detoxifying, doing a cleanse. Whenever someone tells you they're doing a cleanse, like, shut the fuck up with these cleanses. Jesus Christ. You know, it's good to give your digestive system a break. I really believe that there is probably some benefit to fasting. It says it in the Bible, right? You're supposed to fast one day a week in the Bible, even.

It's not all it says in that Bible. Oh, shit. I'm just saying it. It's a lot of wacky shit. Read your fucking Bible for your health. A lot of zombie talk. Nobody know about the zombie.

Don't eat anything like an osprey. You would know this. You would know this. I was talking this about with my wife the other day. She was saying how,

like, you hear about Jesus coming back from the dead, rising from the dead, but you don't hear about it after that. Did he do anything after that? Did he just come back from the dead, rising from the dead, but you don't hear about it after that. Did he do anything after that? Did he just come back from the dead

and like, oh, greatest magic trick ever, and then stop? Or is there a history of him after coming back from the dead? Well, from what I remember and what I understand is that what's fascinating about the difference

between what you'd call somebody who was a Jew, which was what Jesus was, a first century Jew, and a Christian now, is that you have to believe as a Christian that, I believe, three days after Jesus died and they took him off the cross, three women saw him rise from the dead. It was Mary, his mother, and I believe one other woman, I can't remember who it was, and they saw him risen. And I don't believe he was seen after that, although I think there were rumors that somebody else had seen him or something. But for the most part, those three witnesses who said they saw Christ rise, that's the tenet.

You have to believe that he did rise based on their say-so. And that's what makes a Christian. You've got to believe that he rose from the dead. If you don't, and you think he's just a prophet, and he is recognized as a great prophet in Islam, then you're not a Christian. And it's fascinating. It's fascinating that that is the fundamental sort of tenet to that belief. Then the rest is, you know, love your enemy and forgiveness

and all those things that Christianity comes with, which I think has something to offer for sure. Right, but the thing is, like, is there stories of him after he rose? Or did he just come back from the dead and just nothing? No more miracles? No. Nothing? Well, I believe when he died, I know when he died, or when he either died or was risen,

a lot of people were, lepers were healed. Lots of things like that happened. For a little bit. Yeah. But it's not like he came back and led mankind to greater glory. You know what I'm saying? We're still waiting for that. But you know what I mean?

I mean, he came back from the dead, and then that's it. Yeah. Just hanging out. Yes. How weird is that? Well, he came back from the dead because he's God. He went to heaven. He sat, he's sitting next to God.

It's part of the Trinity. He's the Father, the Son, and the Holy Ghost. But he showed everybody that he came back from the dead and then took off. Yes, but the idea was this. So the idea behind the image of Christ was that man, The idea was this. So the idea behind the image of Christ was that man, that God came back down to earth as a man,

suffered as a man, was tempted, with all the things we're tempted from, and in the end was a flawed person who said, why have you forsaken me? But at the end, as he died, what's the last thing he said? It is accomplished. I didn't give in to temptation. I didn't renounce God. I still had faith

regardless of how much I was tortured. I was stabbed. I was put on a cross for three days. Terrible way to die. Tortured and everything else. And I still believed. I still held God close. That's a crazy way to think. Hold God. And then he went to heaven

and then he was risen. So he came down suffered as a man. But the interesting thing about the image of christ is it gives all of us all of us an idea of what to strive for you can never be perfect but you can reach for perfection and that's the idea of being a christian you'll always live a flawed life you'll be forgiven for it because you're a human and you're flawed but at least you can try to reach and the example the, is Christ. It's just so funny how many of those

really short-sighted stories there are where if you examine the stories at all, do it like, hold on, wait a minute. Adam and Eve, okay, they're two people.

They have kids. And then the kids just start fucking each other? They fuck their kids? How's that work? Like, there's no more talking about that.

You know what I mean? It's like these short-sighted stories where they were written back when people didn't do investigative journalism. They didn't have, like, in-depth discussions about story plots and plot lines and what makes sense, what doesn't make sense. They didn't have a lot of literature to fall back on, examine the depth of their story, the believability. Well, a lot of it was symbolism, and the intellectual tradition of the church, like with Thomas Aquinas and people like that, is really,

really rich, because what they were doing was really debating things like the nature of good and evil, whether or not there is a God, the five proofs for God, like Thomas Aquinas went through. So that was really what people were mostly concerned with. I mean, hey, you know what?

I've realized we might not be going the best possible way. I mean, this is a way to go, because we've got to go through San Francisco. Yeah, but have faith in God, dude. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Come on. Why don't you pull your phone up and don't tell the folks at home where we're going so we don't get any young ladies banging on our hotel room. Oh, shit.

Oh, shit. You know what I'm saying? Oh, shit. I know what you're saying. Giannis sent us the address, so just plug it into your maps. If you need a charger, I brought a cord for you because I know it's going to cost those fucking guys. The phone is probably half charged all the time.

Right? Am I right? Yeah. Yeah, I'm good, bro. Come on. I got it right here for you, fuck. I got it right here. Is your phone charged?

Or do you need a charger? It's charged, bro. Is it fully charged? Yeah, man. That's amazing. Come on, bro. Just in case I've got a cord right here. You get scared, though.

If you drop below 80%, you start panicking. Don't you worry about nothing. I've always been fascinated by biblical stories. I've always been fascinated by the similarities that they have to other religion stories, too. Well, we're only 384 miles away. We're fine. Lucky we don't have bosses. We'll be there at 2.

We'll be there at 2 o'clock. Yay. Okay, so just keep that fucker on and turn the volume down. Keep it near your dick. So you get radiation. Do you believe that you get radiation from cell phones and it gives you cancer? I don't know.

I don't know either. But the reason why I ask, I talked to a guy who had cellular cancer and he had his ball removed. Testicular. Did I say cellular? Yeah. Testicular cancer from cellular phones. Technically, you're right.

Cellular. Well, all cancer is kind of cellular, right? But this is not Duncan Trussell, by the way, who also has had one of his balls removed. Did you know that? No, I didn't know that. Duncan had testicular cancer. Cheap ways. One of his balls removed.

That's pretty deep shit, man. That was very recently. Wow. The last two years. It scares me. It should be. It's pretty deep shit, man. That was very recently. Wow. The last two years. It scares me. It should be. It's terrifying. But anyway, this guy went to the doctor and had testicular cancer, and the doctor asked

him, what side do you keep your cell phone on? And he said, right here. And he said, yeah, that's where you got cancer. Jeez. And he goes, you'd be amazed At how many people have the exact same issue Damn He goes, you'll never see anybody

Openly advocating You not keep your cell phone on your body He said, but I don't keep my cell phone on my body And this guy was a surgeon He was an oncologist Well, I actually just carry it in my hand I never have it close to my body.

It's smart. And I always talk on the speaker. I don't have it close to my head. Oh, you're like one of those black eyes that you see outside of restaurants. Yeah, but I don't have a Bluetooth. Do you know how black eyes do that? They put it on speaker.

Where you at? You know, they used to have like Boost Mobile. They used to have those ads. Where you at? That was the thing. They would say, where you at? It was like the bad grammar was a part of their selling point. Like, oh, that's my shit.

I say, where you at all the time, dork? You say, where you at? Damn, I say, where you at? I need to get some Boost Mobile in my life. I said that once on a podcast. Someone said, you're racist. And I'm like, how am I fucking racist? I'm racist because I say black eyes.

You are definitely not racist. Like to speak on... I just... I don't want to defend that. No, but I remember a long time ago I said to you, I'd gotten to know you, I'd known you for about a year, and you're from Boston, and I'd never heard

one prejudiced thing come out of your mouth. And I said, you don't have, and I'm used to that, you know, you see that a lot. And I said, you don't seem to have any prejudice in you. And you just shook your head. He goes, never made sense. Makes zero sense. You knew a lot of dumb white people living in Boston. There's a lot of dumb white people.

There's plenty of dumb everybody. And I know a lot of brilliant people. Neil deGrasse Tyson, I think, is one of the most brilliant people I've ever had a chance to talk to. And he's got an afro. Human potential, ladies and gentlemen. Human potential. Yeah, man. I don't buy it. I just think that

human beings, in general, a big part of who we are is imitating our atmosphere, what we've been subjected to you know what you've come in contact with but the idea that you're limited genetically because of your race

I think people are limited by economics more than anything, they're limited by their environment they're limited by bad neighborhoods shitty choices that those around them make that they've made, imitating those around them, that's what made imitating those around them that's what i see i don't see i don't see you know dumb white people or dumb black people i see people for the most part that are pretty similar that are in shitty circumstances yes and there's always

variables like there's always going to be people whose brains are just shitty they just have nine volt battery brains they're just terrible. That's like, you're always going to see people that have birth defects. You're always going to see people that have, man, what are those

white things on the ground? What are those things? Some weird trees or something? Yeah. Prune trees, I think. You're always going to see people that have issues, you know,

physical health issues. And that's also with the mind. You're going to have mental health issues. And that's also with the mind. You're going to have mental health issues. You're going to have actual brain function issues, just like you have some people have issues with certain organs failing or not working properly. You're going to have that with the brain.

Yeah. There's just no doubt about it. But the idea that it's like, you know, what is that? Oh, it's a cow. I'm like, what is that animal? It's a goddamn cow. I got my game what is that animal? It's a goddamn cow! I got my game eye on, Brian. It's a black cow.

It's a very black cow. There's a lot of cows now. There we go. Cows are not the most majestic creatures, are they? They're just not a very, they're not a very awe-inspiring animal.

You look at them, you're like, ah, food, milk. Well, there was this offer that I got to, there's some places where cows have become feral, and they roam wild on this island, and, uh, they roam wild

on this island, and they're, like, a completely wild animal. And I'm like, dude, I'm not hunting a cow. No, because they're still not running free. I don't care if you let a cow be feral for 20 generations, you're never gonna have cows running free, like horses you think about just running with their

manes in the air. Cows never run. No, no, apparently these cows do run. Oh, yeah? Yeah. These cows react. For ten yards. For ten fucking yards. They're different.

They're different from the cows that we're used to. Nah. Nope. Barely. I don't know, man. Still have giant guts and short legs. In Australia, I think they call them bush bulls. They call them bush bulls.

And they're, like, prized as, like, trophies. Like, people go out and they hunt these bulls. But meanwhile, with a bull, like, people, when you buy a steak, steaks are steers. And what that means is they take a young male and they cut his ball sack off. So his body stops producing testosterone That's why their meat is tender It's a llama Oh my god it's a llama

Just try biting into bull meat sometime This is what I want to say This fucking moose that I killed God damn it this moose was a bodybuilder This is the toughest fucking meat I've ever eaten Moose is so much tougher than beer. So much tougher. Is it really? Oh my god. Way tougher. Wow. Like my kids

sometimes don't like it unless I cook it perfect. I figured out how to do it. It took me some time. Do you have to overcook it? No. The opposite. The opposite. You have to do it just the right amount. It can't be too rare because then it's like it's a little too chewy. It's got to be just a fine medium rare, just a fine medium rare. And you got to cook

it quickly because you don't want to dry all the fat out of it. Do you grill it or do you put it in? That depends. Sometimes I roast it and I'll do it like real slow. I'll do a slow roast. I sear the outside and I'll do do a slow roast, like on the pellet grill. Or I'll cook it in a pressure cooker. I'll do that, which is nice because you cook it all day long. Like for a mousse stew, it's nice for a stew because it gets like it falls off the bone. It gets like, well, it's not on the bone, but you know, it gets super tender when you do it like that because it's being braised and not in the liquid. How much meat do you have to give me?

Hundreds of pounds. Really? You tell me what you want. Come on over to the house. I'm coming over to the house. I need some moose meat. And if you kill a pig, I want some pig. Yeah, and I want to eat this turkey too.

We're going to, I think the plan was, I hope the plan still is this way, we're going to hunt some turkey first, and then Brian's going to go to Edmonton to kill. He'll be at the... I'll be at the comic strip, ladies and gentlemen. Comic strip. In the mall, in that giant mall. Yes, that giant mall. Yeah, and it Hank Shaw, who is a world-famous wild game

chef, is going to give us some tips on how to prepare it, maybe prepare things for us. That was the original plan. I haven't talked to Rinella in a couple weeks about this, though, so I don't know if that's still the case. But he can give some good pointers on how to cook a game correctly but I'll tell you one thing about moose this is really weird and it sounds like horse shit even when I'm saying it

but when I eat it, it gives me energy I believe that it's like I'm eating a fucking stud it's a stud animal I mean this is a enormous animal when you were carrying that leg weigh when you were carrying that leg in that famous picture now? In that picture, I've jacked

off to at least 20 times. The only people who are angry at me from that picture? Oh, it was awesome. Your hands were all covered in blood, just carrying a giant moose leg. I've got another photo that I haven't put on Instagram yet. It's me holding the moose heart in my fist towards the camera.

I'm waiting. How big is that moose heart? It's huge. It's like a basketball. Could you work out with it? Not me, maybe you. Jeez, I guess so. I don't have your delts.

I could attach a handle to it, an on it handle and just swing it. What are you working out with, Brian? Moose heart. Yeah, freeze it. Get it hot. I fucking freeze it and I work out with a moose heart. It's a few pounds, though.

Guaranteed. I don't know how many. Maybe five. So how much does that leg weigh? I have a moose heart at home. I still have the heart at home. If you want, we can cook it. All right.

When we come back to stateside, we'll do a video of me eating moose heart. Yeah, we'll do it What would you say The leg was more than 100 pounds More than 100 pounds Yeah easily Maybe even like 150 Were you straining

But you were acting Like you weren't I'm strong as fuck Oh yeah you are strong No I mean I can only hold it up there For so long You know what

One thing I found I'm a little imbalanced Cause I can hold it up Easier on my right side Than I can on my left side. Makes sense. Yeah, but I thought that was weak. Very weak of me.

I don't know how, when you shoot a moose, you've got to pack all that meat out. You have to bring Sherpas with you or something. We were super lucky, all right, with mine and with my friend Ben's. My friend Ben was the most ridiculous ever. Ben O'Brien, good buddy of mine Who I went hunting with, great guy He's the one who wrote the piece for Peterson's Hunting Magazine And I got my moose one day and he got his moose the next day

When we left to go get his moose We had like four days in a row where we didn't see any bulls. We saw a couple cows and cow, oh, elk. When I say bull, for the uninitiated. Brian and I are seasoned hunters. We can say these things to ourselves. We know what we're talking about. But we didn't see any of them for like four days.

And then when we saw mine, it was only like 65 yards from the road i shot it yeah yeah it was right there right off the road we actually saw it in the truck we were driving to this other location where one of his uh employees had seen some bulls earlier that day and on the way we spotted this bull so i jump out of the car. Within 20 seconds, the bull's dead. And I'm not exaggerating. I mean, the car, we're driving the car. Holy shit, a bull.

Stop the truck. Where is he? He's right there. I'm trying to think, do I lay down? Do I rest my gun against something? Nope, no time. Boom. Standing up.

Dead bull. Yeah, standing up. Wow. Standing up. I just put the rifle on my shoulder, look at him through the crosshairs, bam! He drops. We high-five. We have a dead bull. Oh my god. Yeah.

And how did it take you to butcher that? You butchered it right in the field. Yeah, butchered it right there. We did it all. We took pictures of the whole deal. It took a while. It took a few hours to chop it up. I mean, it's a big animal. What do you do with the guts? It's just bird food. No, we kept the liver and the heart. Those are the pieces that you eat.

Yeah. We took those with us and we cooked them up that night. I put some pictures up on Instagram that night of, uh, cooking heart and, um, and, uh, liver. It was delicious. We cooked liver and onions. It was really good. So fresh. Like, remember when we had that liver in, um, in Montana?

Yes. We ate it the night I shot that deer. Oh, it when we had that liver in Montana? Yes. We ate it the night I shot that deer. Oh, it's incredible how good it is. We were so hungry, too. So hungry for real food. Cold all the time and just hungry. And eating that bullshit freeze-dried mountain packing food. You can keep that shit. So that's how close mine was. My friend Ben shot his on the road. It was on the road. We were driving, and then these two enormous bulls. Mine was about 900 pounds.

Obviously, we didn't weigh it. We're just taking a guess. But his was easily 500 pounds bigger than mine. His was fucking huge. He jumps out of the truck. We see the bull. Stop is about 200 plus yards away, maybe even 250. He jumps out of the truck, gets on one knee, and starts firing.

Bang! And he had this gun called a Blaser. It's from Germany. And it's a bolt-action rifle, but you reload it. You don't have to go up, down, forward. You just go like this. So he's like, pop out, pop out, pop out. He shot it like five, six times.

It was because he's got like a little clip at the bottom of it. It's an amazing rifle. It also breaks down to like a suitcase size. It's an incredible rifle. Germans. Perfect for assassinations. Germans are bad motherfuckers. They're engineering machines.

So anyway, he shoots his We run over to it We gut it Saw it in half We sawed it in half Pickup was like four of us We threw Sam, the photographer Mike, who's the guide

And the outfitter Ben and me We hoist this fucking half a carcass up, throw it in the back of the pickup truck, and then hoist the other half in. Barely can close the gate. You just sawed it where? Right in the middle of the body?

Right in the middle of the road. Jesus. We gutted it, sawed it right down the middle. Oh, my God. So that we could pick it up and throw it in the car. Back at the house in an hour and a half.

But now, what do you, with all the muck and the blood, it's in the back of a pickup truck, obviously, right? Well, we gutted it on the road, so most of the muck and blood spilled out, but a lot of it

was in the pickup truck. You know, that's his hunting truck, so he just hoses that off after every day anyway. Amazing. But my point is, from leaving Mike's house,

who's the outfitter, to seeing this bull, shooting this bull, cutting this bull in half, throwing this bull in a truck, driving back to Mike's house, hour and a half.

We leave, and an hour and a half later, we have this giant fucking moose. Hoofing like, you know, 80 pounds of meat on your back. Well, you know, that's why Steve Rinella's brother trained llamas. That sounds like bullshit, but he has llamas.

He actually has llamas. He hunts them. Packed llamas,as yeah and he carries them around in a van he has a van that he takes these llamas with that's incredible it's amazing so these llamas like they can withstand ridiculous cold and they can pack a lot of weight as long as you pack it on them evenly. Like, you can't have, like, 70 pounds to the left and 60 pounds to the right. It has to be, like, pretty much 70-70. Right. So they really take great care in balancing out the load that they carry. But before he did that, he was packing out an elk by himself,

and he fucked his back up really bad. And so I think about that all the time when I'm with Rinella, because Rinella is, he's a hardcore dude, man. And he is also relentless. And he's one of those guys that, like his brother, they will fuck their backup. Yeah. Like, when we were, I told you the story about us killing the pig, and we kicked it down

the hill. Did I tell you this story? Yeah, it took you like... Hours. We killed the pig at like, maybe like like 5-ish, maybe 6-ish. It was just two of you? Yeah. And by the time two of us and the guide from Tohon Ranch,

and by the time we got back to the cabin, it was long after midnight. It was ridiculous. What do you think that pig weighed? Six hours. Pig wasn't that heavy. It was just how far you had to take it. It was probably 250 pounds. Now, now, when you go hunting up here in North Cali, Northern California for pig, are you

hunting wild boar or are they feral pigs? This is where it gets interesting. William Randolph Hearst, that crazy fuck. You want to talk about one of the nuttiest characters in American history. William Randolph Hearst was the guy that inspired Citizen Kane. Orson Welles made a movie, essentially, which was about William Randolph Hearst being a fucking crazy cunt. And he's also the guy that made marijuana illegal. fucking crazy cunt. And he's also the guy that made marijuana illegal. William Randolph Hearst's efforts to demonize marijuana were absolutely connected to marijuana, not as

a psychoactive drug, but as a commodity, meaning hemp. Because hemp paper, they came up with this thing called the decorticator, and decorticator was a new machine that had been invented that made it much easier to process hemp fiber. Because hemp fiber, back during the slavery days, that's what they used to use. Then Eli Whitney came up with the cotton gin, and now all of a sudden cotton became way more effective economically, way more feasible to use than hemp was. Because hemp, although it's a far superior fiber, it's a very durable fiber. Like, have you ever got a piece of hemp paper? Have you ever fucked with hemp paper? Yeah, you can't really tear it, right? It's crazy.

It's so strong. And the hemp stalk is really, really light, but so hard. It's an alien plant. It really is. It's not like any other plant. Well, William Randolph Hearst, that crazy fuckhead, he, besides doing that and demonizing hemp, and he did it because he had all these paper mills,

and Popular Science Magazine had this cover, Hemp, the New Billion Dollar Crop, and it was all basically because of the decorticator making things very easy to process now. Well, he also, this crazy fuck, brought a bunch of Eurasian boars and let them loose around his mansion. I mean, really, it's a castle, the Hearst Castle. It is a castle.

Yes. Let them loose in Northern California. And to this day, the wild Eurasian boars, like, have you ever seen the pictures of Hunter S. Thompson? He used to hunt them in Big Sur with an AK-47. He used a fucking AK-47, a machine gun. He was out there, I don't know if it was an AK-47, but he used to hunt boars with a machine gun. Those were the descendants of the boars that William Randolph Hearst released up there.

Wow. So you're talking about these wild Eurasian boars. And what's the difference? They're smaller, longer snouts? Well, according to Radella, all of them come from the same genus. Is that what you say? Genus? Yeah.

What would you say? Genus or genus? Genus. I say genus. You say genus. Okay. So, Susgrafa. Susgrafa is the type of animal.

Okay. So, Susgrafa. Susgrafa is the type of animal. And all pigs, domestic pigs and wild boars, they're all the exact same animal. Really? Yeah. That's what's really weird. I mean, obviously, people look different in all parts of the world, right? This is like the difference of a domestic chicken and a forest chicken.

Well, a Chinese guy and an African guy. You see a guy from Africa, you see a guy from China. They're the same thing. They're humans. They're not a different species. Right. Right? So that's sort of the same way it is with pigs. And with these boars, what's weird about wild pigs

is that if you take a regular pig, like Babe, you know, Babe the pig? Yeah. Release the pig. Within three weeks, they start morphing. Once they go feral, once they know that no one's taking care of them, there's no pig slop to be had, then they have to go out and earn. They start changing. They start growing hair.

They start growing thick, dense hair. Their tusks start growing. Their snouts elongate. They literally morph and become a different animal. And they do it really, really rapidly. So when you see like wild pigs, like where we go, Tihon Ranch, where I was a couple weeks ago. They have a great pig hunting program up there. But those are wild pigs. Those aren't Eurasian boars. They look different.

They're black. They're black they're black they're they don't look like like when you say pigs you think of like those white looking things they don't look like that they're they're dark animals and but they're wild pigs what we're hunting is wild boars so they're the the you know it's again same species but they look a lot different they come from a different part of the world so those

are the descendants of the pigs allegedly that were released by William Randolph Hearst at least how I understand it I could be fucking this up but I don't think I am

I think the Spanish were the first people to bring pigs to the new world well they're an amazing animal, man. They're so hardy. Yeah. Bring them anywhere, release a good, healthy population of them, and step back and watch.

And they breed quickly. Like crazy. When Rinella and I were hunting, not Rinella, Cameron Haynes and I were hunting two weeks ago at Tohon Ranch, we saw pigs with, like, litters of, like, eight, nine pavies. Wow. Yeah, eight, nine piglets like eight, nine babies. Wow. Yeah. Eight, nine piglets. Just in the wild. Yep. Wild pigs running around.

We saw a lot of them too. We probably saw 50 pigs. We were only hunting for two days. Well, I heard in Texas there's a major pig problem where you can't shoot your way out of the problem, right? No. Not only that, they've allowed people to use helicopters now. Yeah.

Have you seen any of that footage? Oh, yeah. That Ted Nugent shit? Yeah. He's blasting with a machine gun. From a helicopter. Good, good, good, good, good, good. Yeah.

It's wild, man. And even then, they can't even put a dent in it. That's crazy. That's nuts. I guess it's a huge area. It's a huge area. It's forest area. It's kind of... No. It's just like brush, you know, brush country.

And it's not forest at all. I mean, some of it is forest, but most of it is like what we're looking at right here as we're driving up the California coast. You're looking at, like, I mean, there's pigs out here, guaranteed, 100%. There's wild pigs out here. Wild pigs in Northern California are very common, and that's something that people don't know. There was a news story the other day about San Jose.

They're having a hard time in San Jose proper, in the city of San Jose, where these pigs were tearing up this guy's lawn. They're, like, really common. Wild pigs. They were talking about how, you know, I was telling you how they cleaned up the Hudson River, and now you can fish in the Hudson River,

which nobody thought was possible in the 70s. Even in the 80s, they would have laughed at you. But when you give nature a chance, like, all you have to do is give nature a chance and it'll come back. Oh, yeah. I mean, you know. Nature's a motherfucker, dude. Yeah. I mean, there's so many different varieties of life on this planet alone.

When we look at life in the known universe, we, you know, contemplate the possibility of life on this planet alone. When we look at life in the known universe, we contemplate the possibility of life on other planets. They think there might be life in Europa underneath the sheets of ice because they note that there's cracks in the ice that seems to indicate liquid water underneath. That's so fascinating. Which means there might be a heat source, like a volcanic core or something like that. Well, you just think about the different varieties of life

that we know exist right here on Earth. And it's like, it finds a way, man. It finds a way. Well, you know, China, China is so, the Yangtze, I think, and the Yellow River are so polluted. And I think there's like, there's this fledgling environmentalist movement. There's one guy who's trying to clean up the river, like one dude in China. Think about that guy. Hey, we've got to save, there's one dolphin left, you guys.

They're going to kill it. it's got it on life support then you know these these little these river dolphins that are basically i think there are like three left or something try try doing that try and try stopping the tide of industrialization in china as one guy guys well china is an excellent example of what happens when you just let it run amok. You just let the raping of the earth, the pulling of the resources with no worries whatsoever about the environment. It's crazy. You see some of those cities that they have where the sky is black. Well, now what they're trying to do is when they build a building, they're trying to put on top of the building a garden

where you can grow your own food and all that stuff. So the idea would be when you build this new city, when you fly over it, it's green because every roof is a lush garden that grows its own food, etc., etc. It's a carbon sink.

But good luck. Good luck. Well, also also you're dealing with particulates you know well and they also cook apparently my buddy

spent some time in Beijing they cook in those outdoor fryers and that is a huge part of the problem

with air quality really yes which I was surprised outdoor fryers yes it had less to do it had a lot to do with the cars and things,

but it also had a great deal to do with the fact of how they cooked their food outside. Really? Yeah. In the 70s, when people were using diesel, I guess it was, I don't know, it was compost or whatever it was, where they would burn their trash, that was a huge problem when it came to air pollution. Huge problem. That's why a lot of houses, when you buy new constructed houses in California,

they don't have working chimneys. They have electric chimneys that burn alcohol or whatever, but you're not going to get a chimney that burns wood because when enough people are burning wood in their chimneys, it'll contribute to particulates in the air. That sucks, man, because I love a goddamn fireplace. Nothing like it. Real fireplace.

When I lived in Colorado, we had a real fireplace, and I fucking loved it, man. Went out and chopped wood through the logs in the fireplace. It just smells great. I'm fascinated with how there are certain things that just never replace nature, no matter how technologically advanced we get. Like wool in the wild.

When you have wool, it gets wet. It's going to keep you warm. Yeah, man. Harrison and most anything else. Well, apparently, we're not right about that. They do have some synthetics that recreate that now. That's probably what MeUndies uses. You know what? I'm wearing MeUndies right now.

I am too. I don't even know if it's going to be a sponsor in this show but they're legit yes they are we're not even trying to do them

as a sponsor well I always talk about we did a thing where I had to I lost a bet and Brennan made me I had to do the podcast in just my underwear

and I borrowed is that a wild pick um no you will see them though if you keep your eye out on here really

yeah alright now I'll be peeled but um his brother had these me undies No. You will see them, though, if you keep your eye out on here. Really? Yeah. All right, now I'll be peeled. But his brother had these MeUndies that he'd been wearing for two years. And even the dick part was stretched out. It's got to have a piece on. And I put them on. Did you put his underwear on? Sure did.

He wore it for two years? No, no, no. But I mean, yes. But I mean, they'd been cleaned. So there's only traces of E. coli. So he's only had them for two years. Yes. He hasn't been wearing the same pair. No, but he's had them for two years.

But they were well-worn. And after two years, they were looking good. It's good quality underwear, man. The material held up, even though his dong area was stretched. And much to my chagrin, I wasn't filling it out. Damn it. I found some underwear that were in my underwear drawer That were over a decade old For sure

Sure And the elastic had gone to shit Uh huh Think about how How long elastics last Yeah And my elastic was like Completely loose

To the point where I could put them on I could shimmy my hips And they would just Reveal my cock Yep That's so ridiculous Yep

Yep That was one of the things On the On these ads The average person Keeps their underwear For seven years Seven years ridiculous. Yep. Yep. That was one of the things that me undies add is the average person keeps their underwear for seven years.

Seven years as a fart filter. Seven years. That's ridiculous. As a fart filter. I always wash my ass after I take a dump so.

Well I got one of those Japanese toilets that's a little jet thing. I don't really use it much so it doesn't work as well. Oh I love it.

Nothing like the shower or the sink ladies and gentlemen. I love it. Yeah shower's better. I stick my really use it much, so it doesn't work as well. Oh, I love it. Nothing like the shower or the sink, ladies and gentlemen. I love it. Yeah, a shower's better. I stick my eyes right in the sink. Shower's definitely better. Yeah. Yeah, well, Americans, that whole tissue toilet paper

thing is the worst way to clean your ass. Yeah, it doesn't clean your ass. How about that? And that's what everybody does. Bidets are what you want. In Europe, everybody has a bidet. Yeah, I have a bidet, too, but I never used it. It just sits there. I put magazines on it. It was there when I moved in.

Something about when we bought the house, the lady who lived in it before was European, and she had a bar of soap in that bidet, and I knew it was for her twat and her butthole. I was like, I'm not using that thing ever. I'm not going to use that dirty bidet. That thing that you hover over and squirt at. But I love it when it's actually built into the seat. The Japanese take everything to the next level. They're just so goddamn good at that.

They take things that are pretty good. It's got a seat warmer and all that. Oh, yeah. It blows air on your asshole. Yeah. And it feels good when it cleans it. It gets in there. Really right in there with that water pick.

And it's warm. The water's warm. It also has two different speeds. Like, it'll go, like, like hardcore if you're, like, into that little stinging pain. Meanwhile, we're still

shitting in water. I mean, you know, with all the technology, we're still, it's basically the same, we're shitting the same way people did 100 years ago. Like, 100 years ago,

they were like, someday... Have you seen Fitzsimmons' bit about shitting in water you gotta see it i don't want to give it away on the podcast it's a great bit oh yeah i have actually i have fitzsimmons is a fucking genius man he's such a smart dude he's great he's got a great bit about water and like africa take it for granted yeah clean water well you know, my friend Justin Wren, who's been on the podcast a couple times, used to fight in the UFC and has dedicated his life to helping pygmies out in the Congo. And he spends six months out of every year in the Congo working with these pygmies. One of the things that we did because of the podcast that he and I did together

is we had people donate money on Bitcoin. And then whatever they donated, I matched it. And we used that money to buy wells in the Congo. So these people, he made videos and photographs of these wells that they put together. Oh, so incredible. You know, I had a Josh Doerr who wrote a book on memory. Let me tell people before you say that, fightforth for the forgotten.com fight for the forgotten.com if you're interested it details justin's thing just i don't want to gloss over it um and you can donate too and we're going to have another drive uh soon and i'm going

to whatever anybody uh puts in i'll match uh and you know hopefully we'll build a bunch more wells there it's a real pain in the dick because you hopefully we'll build a bunch more wells there. It's a real pain in the dick because you've got to bribe a bunch of people over there. He goes into great detail about the process of bringing equipment over and how much you have to bribe people and things get held up for weeks because everybody wants their cut. It's a real disaster. It's so hard because so much of, I had, what's his name, Warren Buffett's son, who has $7 billion.

His father said, here's a billion dollars, go change the world. Now it's just $7 billion, go change the world. And his son, who's a farmer, realized that farming practices in places like Africa were just not where they need to be. And he was talking about how hard it is, you know, with building wells and just infrastructure. They just don't have infrastructure. They don't have roads. They don't have things like that.

Property rights are huge. And then civil war and all that other stuff. That other stuff, civil war and that other stuff. Civil war is a big goddamn issue. And then there are other unforeseen consequences. It was really interesting. They were talking about building wells, and I think it was Tanzania. My aunt was very involved in that.

And so they would dig these wells, and so that the women didn't have to go all the way down to the riverbank and, by the way, deal with crocodiles, and also put water in their jugs, carry them on their heads, and walk another mile back to the village. What was interesting, what happened, and the wells ultimately turned out to be a very good thing,

which is what, what is this thing called again? Fight for the Forgotten. Fight for the Forgotten, yeah. The wells are ultimately needed and a very good thing, but one of the things they had to deal with was that when the women were no longer going down to the riverbank as a group, the fabric of the village started to change a little bit

socially and what was happening was that when women would go down to the bank what they didn't realize is that that's where they would gossip and that's where they would bond that's where they would spend their time and talk with each other and help each other out and things like that and when that was taken away they had to kind of

readjust and it became kind of an issue for a while but uh this guy it's kind of a lame story this guy josh doer um i had on my podcast who wrote a book about memory and he his next project was he lived with the pygmies of the congo and he went in a deep deep bush where they were really still very primitive and i said what's it like what was it like there like and he said well they're very of the Congo. And he went in a deep, deep bush where they were really still very primitive. And I said, what's it like? What was it like there? And he said, well, they're very happy people.

They smoke copious amounts of weed. Did you know that? Really? They smoke copious amounts of weed. He said, it's crazy. They're high fucking all day long. And they have really strong bonds. They do die of shitty things.

Like, they'll die. They're pretty healthy, but they'll they'll die of like infections and shit they don't have to die yeah they just don't have yeah they don't have uh antibiotics and things like that but for the most part they just spend all day high as fuck that's crazy yeah i didn't know that yeah that was one thing i got from it i was like what are they like i wanted to hear what they like what's their society like they They're so primitive and stuff. He's like, yeah, they're happy and they hunt. They spend a lot of time hunting. They hunt monkeys with blowguns.

They do all that stuff. Birds, they have all different ways of catching meat. They live primarily on a meat diet. I want you to see Ronella's video of the thing that he did in Bolivia where they killed a monkey and ate it. Fuck, man. Crazy. It's really weird to see. What of the monkey did they eat? They ate all the meat. They even cooked the head, man. Really?

Yeah, which I was like, wait a minute. They shouldn't be eating monkey brains. I don't think so. They say that's where AIDS might have mutated from. I don't think that's what they say. They say it definitely came from monkeys. There's actually a radio lab

podcast on the origins of AIDS. I believe it's called Patient Zero. You know, they call Patient Zero the first person. And they think that it was a hunter and that the hunter caught himself.

And then in cutting the monkey, like butchering a monkey, they got it in his blood. And maybe even more than one animal got into his blood. Wow. Yeah. And mutated, the virus mutated. Yeah. They say that now that the AIDS virus has had to mutate so often because of the protease inhibitors,

that pretty soon it's going to be a disease that just doesn't manifest itself as a life-threatening illness. Yeah, I've heard that. That's really fascinating, isn't it? Yeah, crazy. It's literally getting bred out. Yeah, because it's had to compromise itself so often that it's had to weaken itself, which apparently is a life course of a lot of viruses where they'll have to continue to mutate based on the challenges that they're met with based on people's immune system, their own gene mutations, and all that stuff.

It's pretty wild. Yeah, this Patient Zero is a really fascinating one. Radio Lab is one of my favorite podcasts. Always really interesting stuff. Radio Lab is one of my favorite podcasts. Always really interesting stuff. But this one about AIDS was one of the more fascinating ones because it detailed how far back the original AIDS cases was or HIV cases was. Was it the 40s or the 30s?

The 30s. I think they believe it was. Yeah, they called it. My aunt lived in Zaire for many years, and she said they called it the slimming disease where you catch something and you just waste away. Is this a circle? My aunt lived in Zaire for many years, and she said they called it the slimming disease, where you catch something and you just waste away. Is this thing circling like that? Look at all those hawks.

Yeah. That's crazy. There's like 20 hawks above us. Buzzards. Circling. Those aren't buzzards. No. No, those are birds of prey.

If there were buzzards, they'd be circling over something dead, right? Yeah. What do you call that? Ornithology? Ornithology? Ornithology? I'm an ornithologist. Birds? Study? I study birds. I've got a fucking owl in my yard, dude. Holy shit, is this

cocksucker big. I love owls. They're so big. You don't realize how big they are until you see them sitting on your back porch. Giant wingspans. Nice! They're big, man. It's a fucking two your back porch. Giant wingspans. They're big, man. It's a fucking two-foot-tall bird. This thing's huge. It's a big bird.

It's huge. I mean, it might not be really two-foot-tall. It's one, two. Yeah, it might be two feet tall. For the podcast, it's two feet tall. For the podcast, it's bigger. I was driving once, and I observed one that was in the process of killing a rabbit. And he killed a rabbit right next to the road.

And as I was pulling down the street, my car was loud. I guess my car scared it. So it flew with the bird, the bird flew with the rabbit in its claws. And then, you know what, fuck this. And it let the rabbit go and just took off. Wow. And so I pulled the car over and got out and i found this gutted rabbit just like he just torn the guts out of it and just released it because he just thought i was too sketchy with my car i guess he's just he got it too close to the road and wanted to fly off with the rabbit but just like this

motherfucker might have a gun i gotta let this to let this rabbit go. Nature is just cruel to its... I was watching this special on lions. I want to talk about lions where the males come in, kill all the babies of the other ones, and then sometimes

they'll kill some of the females, too. They'll attack the females. And then they'll try to make nice with them. Yeah, I've probably watched the same one where they ran

this older male out, and these three males tore this male apart. Yes. Oh, so hard to watch, man. Yes. It shouldn't be hard to watch a lion getting bit by another lion, but it was brutal. They were biting his head. One of them was biting his haunches, just tearing his hips apart.

They're vicious, man. Yeah. They're just freaking... Giant teeth. They were just biting into his ass and his legs. He's like fuck. The thing waddles off

and dies slowly. Mm-hmm. Yeah it was all fucked up. It's face was all swollen and covered with cuts. Sits there licking

its wounds until sometimes hyenas close in on you at night. Ooh doggy. And you're gonna die by biting. Enjoy.

Hyenas are fucking terrifying monsters. You know hyenas are the only that we know of matriarchal mammal where the female actually develops a fake dick. Yeah. They have a fake dick.

They're hermaphrodites. Well, it's not a hermaphrodite. They're not. It's a faux penis. It doesn't have any sexual organs. Say faux penis again. Faux penis. I have one of those.

You have a faux penis? Yeah, I wear it sometimes. I strap it to myself. Well, they have one of those. You have a faux penis? Yeah, I wear it sometimes. I strap it to myself. Well, they have it from nature. Imagine nature giving you a fake set of tits to impress women with. I call it a mock penis. You call it a faux penis. Well, they would get on top of males

and fuck them with it. Really? Oh, Jesus. And they have a hard dick. It's hard. Talk about taking my masculinity away from me. And they're bigger. The females are bigger, yeah. They rule the roost. And I believe hyenas are one of the few

mammals, maybe the only one, where the babies will commit fratricide. They'll kill each other. Of course they will. That's the reason why the women are bigger, is to keep the males from eating the babies. What a brutal fucking world they live in. Just devolved. That's the reason why the women are bigger, is to keep the males from eating the babies. Wow.

What a brutal fucking world they live in. It's just evolved. Oh. Yeah, that's how you live. You want to live in a savannah? Okay, well, it's going to be hard. If you think about how, if you think about the history of our world, I mean, men would come into other countries, villages, towns. Yeah.

I mean, Constantinople. Constantinople, I had a history professor say, think about what it sounded like when a civilization, what's the sound of a civilization being destroyed? Constantinople, those walls had stood for a thousand years until the Turks dragged a hundred foot cannon over the course of, it took them a hundred days or something, and blasted those walls down,

killed all the men, and sold all the women and children into slavery. That was always the way it was. And he said, think about what that sounded like, where your town, which then became what? Istanbul. Istanbul used to be Constantinople. Constantine, the father of Christianity in the East, he converted and said, yes, Jesus is Messiah. Yes, there is something called Jesus is Lord.

I've decided that and now this would be. And that was the founding of two papacies, two different popes. One pope in the East, one pope in Rome. Well, if you think about it, the last couple hundred years have really been one of the first times ever in human history where when a boat showed up on your shore it wasn't a bad thing isn't that right yeah now like if a boat shows up on shore it's tourists hey people gonna get out they're gonna spend their american money that's so true they were talking about how the vikings when they came in with

their long boats into the seine into paris into the heart of paris and i think the average parisian was like five foot four and those and those Vikings came in with their swords and just on horseback or whatever they did. You know Vikings weren't that tall either? I always thought Vikings were giant. They're like 5'7". Come on, man. Come on, dude.

I went to Sweden. They're huge. They are now. You know why? They get protein. They drink milk and they eat meat. They weren't that big back then. Really?

Yeah. I think we have these distorted notions about the size of people in the past. I hate real history. It's so much more boring. Well, it might not have been all of them. I mean, there might have been some giant ones. Yeah, some. Some were blonde. Today, people have so much more access to protein. We're just getting much larger people. Look at the football. at the national football league

the big white guys come out of Minnesota that's all Norwegian stock I did stand up in Minnesota I'm telling you man everybody was just long thigh bones Doug Duren gigantic Wisconsinite Doug's just a giant

just the big man with those huge hands. Yeah, well that, those, you know, that's not, well he's talking about getting protein. Yeah. Guy grows his own cows and shoots deer every year. Yeah. I had to share a blind with that giant. Barely had room to move. I miss that dude. He's a great guy. I love that dude.

Doug Duren. Doug Duren is good people. He's probably listening to this right now. Love that guy. Yeah, we gotta get up there this people. He's probably listening to this right now. Love that guy. Yeah, we've got to get up there this year. It's like there's too many places to visit now. It's one thing that's been awesome about all this hunting is that I've met all these cool people and gotten invited on all these cool hunting trips, but there's just not enough time to go on all these trips. I've got to, like, be selective.

There's not enough time to do everything you want. I want to do everything. I wish I didn't have to sleep I could train live a different life I could roll at night yeah if I had a bunch of bodies work on my footwork, my boxing footwork

work on my tennis stroke you wanna work on your footwork I'm 48 years old and I watch video on boxing footwork just in case well it is beautiful to watch someone who's really good at it. I was watching Kovalev just do drills, getting ready for the Bernard Hopkins fight. Yeah, there's something really cool about watching someone who's slick, who moves left and right and right and left, and you can't catch him, you can't find him.

Floyd Mayweather is not the most exciting boxer to watch, but there's some massive artistry to what he does. Well, mainly he doesn't get hit, and he fights killers. It's going to be really interesting to see what Pacquiao can do, because Pacquiao not only hits you from so many different angles, but he throws five, six punch combinations. Yeah. He's a machine gun puncher. He's a machine gun puncher.

He's ridiculously fast. He hits really fucking hard. And he puts himself in danger, which is something that Mayweather doesn't do. Mayweather's just way more crafty. He's way slicker as a boxer. Well, he's very well schooled, too. His father and uncle

were such good boxers. Yeah, no doubt. You know, there's an interesting story about the last guy to beat Mayweather. It was this guy

from Bulgaria who was an excellent boxer who beat Mayweather in a kind of a questionable decision and then went on and had this horrible life and got involved with organized crime and all those shitty things that happened to him.

But apparently he thinks that beating Mayweather, he was the last guy, was like one of the worst things that's ever happened to him. Wow. And it haunts him because Mayweather has gone on to be worth some, he's like worth like 250 million dollars

or something crazy and this guy's broke you know well he's very very broke sometimes not being able to manage victory sometimes getting

what you want that quickly you see it with you know people who get famous at too young an age and have too much money to spend

well certainly but I think in his case it was a little more complicated than that. It was a lot to do with rigged fights, and even perhaps the finals in the Olympics, he was told that the only way he would beat the guy in the finals was to knock him out, and he wasn't that kind of a fighter. He was a boxer, a really slick boxer.

He wasn't a knockout puncher. He wasn't like a Mike Tyson type character. And he talked about that because he had beaten that guy who won the finals in Atlanta that year. He was a Thai fighter. And the guy from Thailand, this guy from Bulgaria had beaten in previous contests. This guy was a world champion. He was a really like high level, high level boxer, very slick boxer. He was a really high-level, high-level boxer, a very slick boxer.

And they were telling him that the only way he could beat this tie was if he had knocked him out. So that was sort of letting him know, listen, the fix is in. And in organized and amateur boxing, they've always had a huge problem with corrupt scoring. I didn't know that. Yeah. Famously, Roy Jones Jr. versus the Korean fighter in the finals of the, I think it was the 88 Olympics. Yeah, it was in Seoul. And he beat the fucking shit out of this guy.

I mean, Roy Jones Jr. in his prime as an amateur boxer was just ridiculously fast. He didn't even use a jab. It was just so crazy. Well, he used a left hook. Yeah. He used a left hook like a jab. So nuts. He had a jab. If you wanted a jab, he could jab you, but he could do something that nobody else could do with that left hook. He threw a left hook like a jab. So crazy. He was, in his prime, there was nothing like him. I love watching that stuff because, you

know, I was watching the Cubans practice again on YouTube. I'm watching the national Cuban champion practice with mitts. What was really interesting is watching him with this little guy, and very few punches were thrown. It was more foot movement. He was practicing where to punch from. And once in a while, boom, throw a jab. Once in a while, ba-ba, with two shots. But it was really conservative movement.

If you look at the way Mayweather fights, he very rarely throws a right hand. A lot of it's like he sets it, jabs, uppercut, then he'll throw. But he throws very few punches. Yeah, he's very economical. Yeah. Because if you unload a bunch of punches like Pacquiao does, you leave yourself open. I mean, one of the things that makes Pacquiao so exciting is that he's kind of vulnerable. But then you see like the Juan Manuel Marquez fight, he got knocked out.

And it's because of that very same aggressive attacking style. But when Mayweather fought Juan Manuel Marquez, he shut him down. I know. Like, there was no offense to be had. Well, that's what I've been thinking about, too, when it comes to, because Marquez has given Pacquiao serious fights. A lot of people thought he won the first two, in fact, or the first fight. And so Marquez and Pacquiao were always very, very matched.

Marquez is a hell of a fighter. And when you look at what Mayweather was able to do to Marquez, you wonder whether or not he's going to be able to do the same thing to Pacquiao. Yeah, it's interesting. I think Marquez is not as fast as Pacquiao. Pacquiao is way faster, but Pacquiao stood right. I think Marquez is not as fast as Pacquiao. Yeah. Pacquiao's way faster, but Pacquiao stood right in front of Marquez, and in doing so and standing in front of him and trading with him the way he did,

not trading with him stupidly, it wasn't mindlessly. I mean, he was landing combinations, but he puts himself in danger. He gets right in there. Speaking of putting yourself in danger, Jason Ellis, did you see Ellis Mania where he fought? He's crazy. He's out of his mind.

He is out of his mind. We had Uriah Faber on the fighter kit and he was talking about how, like, Uriah was told, because you see that Uriah for 50 seconds

goes nuts on Jason. And I said, and Brennan said, why did you go so crazy? He goes, look, dude, the guy's actually pretty slick and he's not a bad,

you know, he's got a lot of power. He's big. And I'd heard that he was hitting guys and rocking them and knocking some guys out. Well, he knocked out Gabe Rudiger. Gabe Rudiger, who was on The Ultimate Fighter. Right. He's tough. Former WEC legweight champion.

And he knocked him out. He knocked him out with an overhand right. Yeah, he could punch. Ellis is crazy, man. I had a conversation with him once about how many times he's been shut off. And he said he's been shut off about six times from skateboarding. God. Just falling, laying down.

I said, why do you do that? Why don't you wear a headgear? He goes, I don't like myself. Oh, God. Well, he's had a rough life now. You know his story. His story that he's talked about pretty openly about being sexually abused by his dad. Jesus. I mean, you don't tattoo a wolf on your fucking head if everything's going great. Yeah. He's very open about that stuff. I like the dude

though. He's a good dude. Despite all that shit, he's a good dude. And that's his therapy. His therapy is to go in there and go to war. And he spars a lot, man. He gets in there, he gets busy. There's videos of it online. I mean, he spars fucking hard, man. And we were talking about this before the fight when we were filling up with gas about Jamie Varner.

Jamie Varner, who just retired recently from the UFC, was talking about his career and the issues he's having with traumatic brain injury now. And he's worried about his future. Went to a doctor and the doctor estimated that he had somewhere around 30 plus concussions. And he's starting to have memory issues, starting to have issues enunciating words. He's seeing a cognitive therapist once a week now.

And Jamie's only 33, I think. 32 or 33. Really? Yeah. And he only got, I only saw him get KO'd, I think, once by Abel Trujillo. I mean, it's crazy. He's a real high-level fighter, a very good fighter. And sparred a lot with bigger guys.

It's one of the things he's saying, cut himself short, cut his career short. Did a lot of sparring with guys like Ryan Bader. Ryan Bader, he fights at 205. He's a big guy. He's a beast. He's a fucking thick dude. He's also been fighting since 2003. It's a long time.

It's a long time. 12 years of not just fighting, but also of the gym wars. Yeah. Well, I was talking to my buddy who was a European champion twice and bronze medals in the Olympics. And he estimated, not counting just when he was a kid and all that, but he estimated he had 106 fights and including, I think, 16 or 26

pro fights. And he estimated that in getting ready for those fights and those fights, a conservative estimate, because he took, say, five punches per round. That's conservative. Like, just jabs and stuff. He's taken over, over the course of his lifetime,

55,000 shots to the head 55,000 shots to the head That is so crazy Yeah Because so much of it Is in the gym Getting ready for those For those fights

Well, George St. Pierre Just fighting in the UFC Was hit over 800 times Yeah, 855 times Or something crazy Something crazy like that Yeah Yeah

You just think about that No, thank you From guys like Tiago Alves over 800 times now. Yeah, 855 times or something crazy. Something crazy. Yeah. Yeah. You just think about that. No, thank you. From guys like Tiago Alves, Josh Koscheck, Johnny Hendricks. Monsters.

Monsters. John Fitch getting hit in the head by BJ Pat. I mean, guys who, like, can fucking hit you hard.

Yeah. And he's getting hit hundreds of times by those guys. You're gonna have to pull over on the side of the road. I'm gonna pee.

Oh, okay. I gotta pee out of my huge dick. Why didn't you just let me know? I don't know. You're going to have to get to the point where, like, you're going to die. Like, how long do you think you can last?

If you had to, bet your life on it. If I had to, here's the thing about your bladder. It expands. So you have an initial panic moment. Don't be so sure.

And then wait. Don Marrera knows a guy who had to, he has a fucking catheter. He has a piss bag because he ruptured his bladder. Yeah, but he's a bitch. From holding in his piss. Here's the thing, man.

You just use your mind. Yeah. And you just let it relax and let it expand even more. Really? Yeah. What if it tears? Well, then it tears, man. Whoa.

Then I'll suture it. You don't give a fuck. Who needs a bladder? You're crazy. They're growing new bladders in petri dishes yeah I've heard that isn't that nuts

yeah they use cartilage I guess from and they spray it with stem cells and it actually will grow they did that with an esophagus a woman had esophageal cancer

and they they gave her an esophageal an esophagus transplant isn't that nuts yeah they took a cadaver's esophagus

and they took the cartilage, they strip it and then they spray it with stem cells and it grows. That's the new frontier. And that's so exciting. Well, the new frontier, the real exciting thing about is people who've had spinal cord injuries, regrowing spinal cords. I hope so though. I just talked to a neurosurgeon who said the two things they just can't fix is bad brain tumors and a broken spinal cord. They've been able to regenerate it in rats though, I believe.

I hope so. Yeah, I hope so too. I mean, I feel like it's just a matter of time. It always is. I mean, you saw that recent story where they were talking about head transplants just being a few years away. Yeah. I don't think so. What are you, a away? Yeah. I don't think so. What are you,

a doctor? Yes. You don't know. A head transplant. You don't know. I'm fucking crazy with that man. A head transplant.

You're fucking crazy. They transplant your body on a guy's like, like your head on Terry Crews' body. Yes. I do believe anything is possible.

Anything you can imagine will eventually be possible. Why do you look Samoan from the neck down? Because I don't like my body. I do a lot of working out, and I look at myself, and I'm like, damn it, I still look like an accountant. Shit.

Athletic, though. These vineyards and wine places up here are really weird places, aren't they? Yeah. Vineyards, wine country. up here are really weird places, aren't they? Yeah. Vineyards. I want to live in a vineyard.

I have such a fantasy of living in Napa, in a chateau, and being a gentleman. I want to be just a gentleman in scarves, tweed jackets, pipe. I want two German shepherds with German names. Schutzhund training. Wow, Schutzhund, are you kidding? They will be, I was about to say,

they will be bite trained. Only trained to bite men. Very've got shuts on. Are you kidding? There will be, there will be, I was about to say, there will be bite trained. Only trained to bite men. Very good around women and children. I would hire a chick to kill you. Then I'd rather die by a woman. Wow.

Yes. Not me. If she's like some assassin but really hot, she'll probably try to, she'll probably make love to me first. Do you think?

I'll be overcome. Yes. She'll probably make you think she's going to make love to you. Yeah, and I'll die with a hard-on. Not a bad way to die. No, you'll die with a half a hard-on. Okay. She'll probably make you think she's going to make love to you. Yeah, and I'll die with a hard-on. Not a bad way to die. No, you'll die with a half a hard-on.

Okay. She'll let you get fully hard. Really? Damn it. There's some blood going, and I die. Yeah, with that silencer. Yeah, that's right. Those ideas are great about living out here, but how are you going to do stand-up?

Boring. Boring. I know. How about your neighbors? He's going to come over all pilled up, tell you some stupid going to do stand-up? Boring. Boring. I know. How about your neighbors? He's going to come over all pilled up, tell you some stupid story about his wife. I'll be pilled up. I've got to pee so badly.

Okay. I'll take the next exit here. It's probably over. I'll pee on the road. It's probably a nine-hour podcast. How long have we been doing this for, you think? If you had to guess. Not more than an hour.

No, come on, man. An hour and nine minutes. Wow. There you go. You're pretty good at this. Not bad. So I'll take the next exit. Even while come on, man. An hour and nine minutes. Wow. There you go. You're pretty good at this. Not bad. So, I'll take this exit. Meanwhile, I got a bladder full of pee-pee.

I'll take this exit. Dee-dee-dee-dee-dee-dee. Okay, we're going to pull over here so Brian can pee. And when he does, I'm going to talk shit about his hog. Yeah, I'm going to pee something. I'm going to pull it out of the holster. I'm going to pull out his cat. He's got a toe in mine.

You know what I mean? His fucking cat. When I piss, I like to have a voice gotta pull it out of the holster. He's got a Joe in mind, you know what I mean? When I piss, I like to have a voice like this. I gotta piss. I don't want to get arrested. There's something aggressive about saying piss. I don't want to get arrested for you having to take out... I'll pay the fine. It's not a fine, dude, it's jail.

You're Joe Rogan, you're not gonna get arrested. You say that, dude, but you never know. The cop will be like, holy shit, Joe Rogan, and that guy who looks like Joe Rogan. But what if there's a guy who wanted to try out for Fear Factor but never got on? Then you're in trouble. Then I'll sweet-talk him. I've talked my way out of a lot of speeding tickets. Alright, I'm going to pull over right here, just run

out into the fields and pretend you lost your keys. You're just right near your truck, bro. Don't kid yourself. I'm not running out in those fields. I'm afraid. Alright, Brian is now about to step out of the vehicle to urinate. The it is. All right, Brian is now about to step out of the vehicle to urinate. The car is in park.

I'm pulling my dick out on an empty road. And if he pulls it off, I'm going to climb out, and I'm going to pee. And then, yeah, he's peeing. My dick is so painfully small right now. Why is it so small? It's like a turtle. It's pulling itself into my body. Why?

Does your dick do that when you have to pee? Well, I got to pee bad. It goes into combat mode. But wait a turtle. It's pulling itself into my body. Why? Does your dick do that when you have to pee? When I got to pee bad. It goes into combat mode. But wait a minute. What about pee hard-ons? Don't you get pee hard-ons? When I got to fight or pee, my dick pulls way in. It protects itself.

Can't even see my balls right now. That's weird. That's very unusual. Most people, when they have to pee, their dick gets hard. Yeah, but I also order extra small MeUndies. I like it real tight. Basically a testicle cinch. Do you think you're doing damage to your dick and balls?

Hopefully. Keeps me sin free. Why don't you just take saltpeter like priests do? I do that too. What is that saltpeter stuff? Is that a testosterone suppressant? Apparently they put it in the water in fucking jails. Do they really?

Yeah, to keep you from getting... They really do that? I've heard that. How can they do that? You can do that? You can just experiment with prisons? That's what they say.

Can you do that? You can like, don't tell them what you're doing? I don't know, I guess so. I use a leather belt. I just strap it

around my fucking piece. How big is your belt? Is it a thick belt or one of those little skinny dress belts? No, it's a thin belt because it's got to get around the base of my dong and my balls.

Poor thing looks purple. I don't even recognize my dick sometimes. It just looks like a lump of purple. I watched a video once of a guy explaining how to stretch your cock out. I'm still peeing, by the way. They can elongate your dick. I hope somebody timed that pee. And

finished. Have you ever heard of someone elongating their dick? They stretch dicks out right i'm gonna step out now too oh now you got beer pressure i don't have to but my my bladder is amazing you know why because of doing that goddamn podcast doing those three hour podcasts with with coffee like people always say to me like how the fuck do you not pee like they run out of the the podcast to pee and from five years of doing it, I think my bladder's super used to it. Very, very elastic. Yeah, I get on planes. I fly for, like, six hours and not pee.

Jesus. All right, talk into that thing. All right. Joe is now going to pee himself. Let's see what he's working with. I actually have it on good authority. He's got a piece on him. So let's see what happens.

There it is. Short but thick, ladies and gentlemen. There it is. There he is. There's the famous Joe Rogan. And you're like, hey, hey, hey, is that Joe Rogan? Yeah, let's see if it's clear piss. Nah, a little yellow, buddy. A little yellow. Gotta get you

hydrated. No, I take vitamins, you fuck. It's from all your antioxidants? All my vitamins. There you go. How many vitamins did you take today?'s from all your antioxidants? All my vitamins. There you go. How many vitamins did you take today? None today. Last night, probably. But I take little packs.

That's it. That's all my pee. That's all your pee. No wonder. He's got nothing going on. All right, ladies and gentlemen. 16 ounces of coffee, and that was all my pee. 16 ounces of coffee.

I'm amazing. I'm amazing. I'm amazing. Body absorbs. Alright, we're back in here. Back in the saddle again. And back to the wilds of the wine country where we're going to hunt birds that you can find in a supermarket. We're going to hunt hard. Hard birds. We hunt hard and true the way we fuck apparently these birds taste way different. I've never had wild turkey It's very dark meat yeah, that's what I've heard over it's tough. I've heard you got to cook it, right I'm gonna show you a video that I said to me of being chased by four wild turkeys Ha I would have let them catch me. I would have beat the fuck out of

Fuck Wild turkeys. Ha! I would have let them catch me. I would have beat the fuck out of them. Fucking cunt turkey. They're an aggressive bird. No, not aggressive enough. I'll beat the fuck out of a turkey. You ever actually had turkeys come after you? They're, like, notoriously skittish. They run from people. Oh, they chased me around the car for a half hour.

We have it on video. Why didn't you kill them? Well, I would have done it just for America. I was a little afraid of them. I mean, I would have killed that bird. I'll tell you what, the bird's not hearing a piece of peep out of you. What bird?

It's a fucking ostrich. Yeah, I thought that until I grabbed one by the neck because the cunt was trying to bite me in the face. Is that true? Yeah, on Fear Factor. You grabbed it by the neck? Yeah.

What happened? Well, I have very strong hands and he didn't like it at all. They do have a thin neck. How thin is the neck? They kicked me, though. If he wasn't behind a fence, I wouldn't have done it. Yeah, he would have kicked you.

But then I would have taken his back. What the fuck? I don't think so. Think I could ride him? I guess you can ride him. Ride him? You know, I thought about this when it comes to kangaroos. You know, kangaroos will fuck you up.

They'll kick the shit out of you. Only in the mail. But I think I could arm drag one and take its back. Really? about this when it comes to kangaroos. Kangaroos will fuck you up. They'll kick the shit out of you. Only in the males. But I think I could arm drag one and take its back. Really? Dude, I'm a black belt in jiu-jitsu. Kangaroos never had anybody take their back like I can. Especially if I get on this right arm.

That's my strong side. My strong side is the right side. If you ever know, if I arm drag your right arm, you're in trouble. If I arm drag your left arm, I got some holes in my game on the left side. I got some holes. I got some holes in my left arm drag game. My transition between the left arm drag and the right arm around the neck is not as quick. Who have you rolled with that just completely outclassed you as a jiu-jitsu guy?

Because you're a legit black man. Well, Eddie Bravo always outclasses me. He's too good good jake shields mauled me um jake shields just mauled you yeah he mauled me i kept him off like a minute and a half with sheer strength and athleticism then i got tired and it was then it was a pin festival really a tap festival rather just closed in on you yeah he just crushed me um but he was bigger than me and better than me. I was lighter back then, too. A few guys like that are what led me to really get into heavy lifting weights, too. I mean, technique is the most important thing, for sure.

And people reading this that are into jiu-jitsu, oh, man, you don't know shit about jiu-jitsu if you think it's important to be strong. Listen to me. It is very, think it's important to be strong. Listen to me. It is very, very, very important to be strong. Having great technique is more important. But if you have great technique, if two people have equal technique, their technique is just as good, and the one person is physically stronger, that person will absolutely have an advantage.

And there's two things you can change you can change your technique and you can change your physical strength and only changing one of those in my idea is very short-sighted now if you were in a weight class like say if you're competing at 155 pounds and you didn't want to gain any weight because then it wouldn't be you know you'd have to cut weight it would fuck you you up, that totally makes sense to me, don't do that, but don't get so big, you're like a bodybuilder, and you know, your muscles need all that blood, and so it robs you of oxygen, don't do that either, but the reality of human athletic endeavors is mass, and strength, and speed. All those come into practice. All those come into play. Like just technique, it's not the only thing that's important. It is a very

important thing. It's probably the most important thing is technique. But it doesn't mean that you can't also be physically strong and that physical strength won't benefit you because it absolutely does. Especially defensivelyly physical strength keeps you from getting caught in a lot of shit if again if you already have technique and when you add in like striking physical strength can keep you out of positions and allow you to strike people where someone with better technique if you weren't nearly strong would be able to take you down. Like, try taking down Shane Carwin.

You know what I'm saying? I mean, Shane Carwin might not have as good jiu-jitsu as, you know, fill in the blank somebody else. But good luck fucking taking him to the ground. Partly it's because of his technique as a wrestler. But don't think that there's a lot of guys that don't have really good wrestling technique. Like Clay Guida has really good wrestling technique.

Do you think that Clay Guida could stop Shane Carwin from taking him down? No. Shane's so much bigger and stronger. Do you think Clay could take Shane down? No. Good fucking luck. Good luck. Physical strength doesn does matter. If I put you,

if I gave you five exercises only, and you can only do five exercises, what would they be to build strength? Deadlift would be number one. Because deadlift works your arms, it works your back, it works your traps, it works your grip strength, it works

your legs, it works your whole core, like everything. It works your abs. Deadlift's the king of all lifts, in my opinion. I probably do it too much. It fucks with your back if you do it too much. And I'm a meathead, so I do lift too heavy sometimes. But I think the deadlift is probably number one.

Squat's a big one. Cleans, Power cleans. Clean and press. That would be one group movement. Clean, press, that would be one. Just those. What about bench? Nah.

That's important, right? It's not nearly as important. It's not bad. It's good defensively. Jiu-jitsu-wise, it's very good defensively. What do you do with kettlebells? I do everything with kettlebells. I'm such a huge fan of kettlebells.

I like big compound movements, man. Yeah. Like, I like clean press squat. That's one of my favorites with kettlebells because it's so ruthless. If you clean, like double clean, right? Like 270s. You take 170 in each hand. You swing them between your

legs, clean them, press them overhead, and then drop down to a squat, and then all the way back up. That's a lot of weight. While it's pressed over your head. And then start all over again. Clean, press, squat. When you go through 10 of those, dude, you're fucking exhausted. Yeah, that's crazy. Because it's not just crazy weight because you can do the same thing. The movement is a bitch. It's a large group of movements, and it just makes your entire body strong and rigid and able to move with a full range of motion with all that weight.

I like doing Turkish get-ups. Turkish get-ups are not a glamorous exercise. Like people, you don't see people getting excited about doing it because it's awkward and it's, you know, it requires a lot of movement. There's a lot going on, but it's also one of those things that... That's where you lie down and you have your arms straight up, right? Yeah, first you lie down on your back and you kind of have your arm racked, right? You have the kettlebell racked in your arm.

You extend your arm up and then you get up. And there's technique to it. Yeah, yeah, yeah, there's technique to it. You know, you get up on one arm. You have one leg underneath you. If you're interested in doing it, anybody's interested in doing it, there's a bunch of pretty good instructionals you can get online. But here's the number one thing that I always say to anybody when it comes to kettlebells. Start light.

There's a really good workout that I do with 35 fucking pounds. I mean, I've been lifting weights for a long goddamn time. But I have a great workout that I do with 35 fucking pounds. And it's a lot. I mean, I've been lifting weights for a long goddamn time. But I have a great workout that I do with 35 pounds, and it's plenty. It sounds ridiculous. Like, how could one 35-pound weight be enough? But if you, like, Keith Weber Kettlebell Cardio, Extreme Kettlebell Cardio Workout DVD,

he does it on the beach, and I think he uses a 35 pounder i use a 45 sometimes sometimes a 50 pounder 52 pounder and it's a goddamn brutal workout you use one kettlebell that's all you need whoever yeah so i mean he's been a podcast guest too great guy knows a lot about strength and conditioning and kettlebells for the use of conditioning. This is one of the best exercises. Where they come out of Russia. Yeah.

This badass motherfucker's from Russia. Yeah. Those Russian scientists who came up with, they did a lot of the pioneering research on steroids and stuff like that. They sure did on their women. On their women! They did, man. There's some women track and field records that still have never been broken. One of the women

became, one of the shot putters became a man. Of course she did. Because she just was, she just became a man. Yeah, she'd been taking so many steroids. She just developed an Adam's apple. Yeah. Her clit looked like a dick after a while. I was like, well, I think it's time.

I just fuck it. I'm a man now. Yeah. Fuck it. Yeah, it's a. I just fuck it. Oh, man, now. Yeah, fuck it. Yeah, it's a weird thing that they're doing, man. Well, there's a New York Times article recently about gene doping, and that that's going to be the new issue that they're going to have to deal with with cheating in athletics. Yep. Brian looks Samoan, so. Well, that's, you know, that's the next stage.

They're going to manipulate genetics. They're going to be able to literally change, like, the design of the body. Like, your body is supposed to be six feet tall and this amount wide and this amount of mass. Not anymore. Now it's going to be six foot six and it's going to be just as wide and you're gonna have fucking thicker bones and you're gonna be built like a neanderthal it's so crazy yeah they're gonna be able to do weird shit in our lifetime in our lifetime we're gonna see some of the strangest athletes ever yeah i think i was thinking about that they'll probably be like the the natural league the the the organic league and then the hydroponic league that's hilarious i wonder if

that's true well it would have to be how are you gonna competition when you have linemen that are 500 pounds and and built like you know silverbacks you know there's a real issue with football period now i mean there's a lot of people that are debating whether or not football even has a future. I think ultimately, as far as a near future, it certainly does. But there's a lot of people now that are aware of the damage that's being done when you're playing football on a regular basis that weren't before. There's this young guy who's just 24 years old, NFL player, who just retired. Yeah, and he was a defensive player of the year, I think. You know, Matt Matrione, who was on the podcast, said he's got a son,

and his son wants to play football. And Matt played football, I think, for seven years in the NFL. Matt said, absolutely not. When you're 16 or 17 and your brain is way more developed, we can talk about it. We can have a discussion about it. You're not playing football now when you're 11 or 12. It's not happening. Buck up your head

while you're 11, man. But that's what you did. You always, Pee Wee League, you played tackle football. I mean, you know. Yeah, what was that dude's name? I forget his name.

Something Henry. He died. He had some sort of crazy thing going on with his girlfriend. She was yelling. She took off in his truck. He jumped in the back

of the truck. Oh, yeah. He was a wide receiver. He fell out of the truck. He jumped on the back of the truck. Oh, yeah. He was a wide receiver. He fell out of the truck. He fell out of the car, hit his head, died. So they do an autopsy on this cat and find out he's got a brain

of an 80-year-old with Alzheimer's patient. Yeah. And he was 28 years old. Yeah. I mean, his brain was fucked. All this traumatic brain injury evidence in his brain.

And they're saying, like, look, man, this is not, this is not like an aberration. A lot of these guys, they're running around, they look normal, they're acting fairly normal. But if you notice, one of the things that football players are known for is being kind of reckless, right? They're known for having poor impulse control. He's like, well, there it is.

That's what this is. When you're looking at a guy like that who was an active NFL player, an excellent football player, a great athlete, and he does something as nutty as jumps on his fucking girlfriend's truck, which he's trying to pull away, falls down, hits his head, and dies, like, that's poor impulse control, right? That's someone being reckless. dies, like that's poor impulse control, right? That's someone being reckless. And then when they do an autopsy on them and they find out

their brain's cooked from all the years of playing football, that is what's happening. It does make you really wonder on so many different levels as we learn more about the brain and more about why people behave the way they do or why you know, or how much damage

is really being done, it does sour you. It really does make you wonder about the future. Like, you know, even, even, uh, I was talking about this, I think maybe even on your podcast, but, you know, as they learn more about what a serial killer's brain looks like, or for, for that matter, even pedophiles, they find a lot of them are left-handed. So it might be a neurological thing or at least have its origin somewhere. So if that's the case, then let's just say that a pedophile is essentially, that's something that is genetic, or there's something that went on.

If that's the case, then that's a handicap. You could technically say you're mentally handicapped. And then you have to ask, if that's the case, then does he fall under the Americans with Disabilities Act? Because if not, then you have to define what the difference is. And if the difference is, you know, like you were talking about in the beginning of the podcast, you're just not dealing with what would be considered a normal brain.

Right. Well, okay. All right. So how much of it is his fault? Right. And how much of it is something that he essentially can't control? And does it matter? I mean, just because something's not someone's fault, if they have some just predetermined inclination to go out and kill people.

Yes, you're going to jail. Like a murderous intent. Yeah, what do you do? Put them in jail. Yeah, I guess. I don't care that you... Yeah, I mean, you want to keep society safe. That's the idea.

Well, it's like Hannibal Lecter in those movies, The Silence of the Lambs. It seemed like what they were trying to say is here's this brilliant guy who actually enjoys killing people. There's something about him that enjoys killing people. What is it? What's the tick? What causes him to actually enjoy that? Well, you get a guy like that and you lock him in an insane asylum and you study him. That was what was supposed to be the premise of the Silence of the Lambs, right?

Yeah. They're going to use him to figure out how to find this other serial killer, this Buffalo Bill guy. When you get a guy like that, what do you do with him? Do you just kill him? Do you study him? Do you lock him in jail? What is the

humane thing to do? Is it humane to kill him? One way to look at it is is he a sick dog and you just get rid of him? But the other thing is, in a society, if you take into account he's sick, he's a maniac, then he's in a mental hospital or he's in a jail and kept away from society. Well, here's the real question. Can you fix him? If you do fix him, is it okay? That's what I was going to say. Like, what if someone's a pedophile and they fuck your kid and then they fix him? What?

No, you're dead, right? You're dead. But I was just literally about to bring that question up. If they can figure out what the mechanism is and they fix that mechanism, now you have a normal person. You're right.

You have, what does that say about punitive punishment? You want revenge, you want him to be punished, but now he doesn't have those impulses anymore. Now he's sorry.

Now he's a normal guy. Now, in fact, maybe the idea is abhorrent to him. If that technology exists, you're right, it really does raise a question. What does it say about forgiveness, punishment,

and what do you do? Well, it's also, we have that need for an eye for an eye. You find out that some guy murdered somebody. You want that person for an eye. You find out that some guy murdered somebody, you want that person locked away forever. You find out somebody raped somebody, you want that person

locked in a fucking cage and kept away from everybody you love and care about. So they, the type of person that does that is an evil person. The type of person that would victimize someone is an evil person. We want them removed from our society. But if you find out it's just a disease... Well, and by the way, what if he was 17 when he did it?

He's an adolescent. He'd been victimized. He kills somebody. He's 45 now. Right. And his brain was very different. In fact, when he was 17, his brain hadn't fully developed. We know teenagers, I believe it's their frontal cortex,'t fully developed, so they are more impulsive. They don't have the part of the brain that

makes them more cautious. Deep into their 20s. Yes. So you had a kid with a different brain. He goes to jail for doing something horrific. He's now 45. He's a different person. But yet he falls under a certain statute where he's got to be killed because that's the death penalty. I think that was the case with Mumia Jamal and another guy. You know, when he went to jail, he was 18 or whatever, 16. Now he was 40. He's got his master's degree and he helps gang members. He's just a different human being. Do you put him to death?

Well, isn't it interesting that those are the ages that they want to recruit people for war? Yeah. They're recruiting 18-year-olds. They want to get people fresh out of high school, join the army. Poor impulse control and not really aware of the big picture yet. Yeah. Which is really kind of fucked up. I've been talking about this lately, and I'm probably going to do a bit about it,

that I don't think, I think that the way to stop war is no one under 40 goes to war. War is only people over 40. Somebody was saying also the other way is, if you look at violent crime, it's almost overwhelmingly committed by men between the ages,

I think of 15 and 23 or something crazy. Really? Yeah, and if a society is really serious about getting rid of all violent crime, just lock up every boy from the age of 15 to 20 or whatever, and you'll cut the rate by 98% or something. So just put them in regimented. If you think about most societies in history by the time you were 17 or whatever you were carted off and you were first you were in boarding school you

were in a special school and then you went to the army so boys were put in a very regimented place where they where they were controlled for most of their teens and even into their 20s and then they were released into society isn't that a big part of our problem as... Hearst Castle. Oh shit, the Hearst Castle. We're passing the Hearst Castle, which is where that crazy fuck released his wild boars throughout the land.

Wild boars everywhere, ladies and gentlemen. We're in boar country. Boar country. What we're dealing with as a civilization, like as a species is all of the stuff that got us to here like all the barbaric acts, all the fighting off the Vikings, all the fighting off the intruders all the fucking as much as you can because everybody's going to get diseases

and so few people are going to survive that you have to be as prolific sexually as possible to ensure that your genetics carry on and that's how we got to 2015 that's how we got to this place but in in our innovation and in our our advancement and our understanding of medicine, our advancement of infrastructures and cities, we've now hit this point where we kind of don't need a lot of those instincts. Those instincts, those violent tendencies that the young have to fight, to battle, and all the other crazy shit that led us to get to this position is also what's

kind of fucking us up and what's putting us in this position where we are over fucking. We all, you know, we do have 7 billion goddamn people on the planet. We do have still this huge problem with violence and we're still involved in wars pretty much in every single continent all over the country all over the world rather it's really weird it's like what got us to the dance now needs to be examined and we need to figure out like how do we fix all this shitty wiring this operating system that's so outdated we're running running this Windows 95 operating system on this 2015 brain. That's a huge question. But I think the answer comes from

understanding, continuing to research and understanding more. I think we're just... Human development is always just a process of learning more and more about ourselves. And just time, right? Yeah. I feel like that's what's going on too.

It's like this Religious Freedoms Act that went through Indiana, and all these religious people are freaking out. This country's going to hell in a handbasket. I found so many people online. I was Googling people that were reacting to it, like the people that were against having this act revised. And, you know, it's amazing how many like christians were up in arms and people were trying to change this and you're just this is anti-christianity

in its purest form and i just feel like what they're doing these people that are freaking out about this kind of shit that are like really clinging to these notions they realize they don't have much time left like this is this is an antiquated way of thinking that just really doesn't have a place anymore and it's just a matter of time as time goes on slowly but surely this stuff's going to be eradicated in a way that really it never had a chance to before well yes and no i think that religion for a lot of people and it's really interesting because somebody was saying you know we put a lot of emphasis on being politically correct what we should be doing is putting emphasis on being emotionally correct what does that mean everybody wants to know and feel like

their feelings are valid their feelings are valid. And the problem with an atheist and a religious person talk is this. The religious person has religion gives them a feeling. And that feeling might be very comforting and very inspiring. It gives them reason to move on. They might have lost a child. They were raised that way.

The church is a good memory. Whatever it might be. Got them off drugs. And religion has done a lot of that. Once I was in prison, God saved me. That's all you need sometimes. And in that sense, you know, I think when a lot of times when an atheist,

you hear these debates, and the same thing goes with gun control. The minute that one side starts talking, what they're really saying is they're threatening the religious person with taking that feeling away from them by invalidating how they feel by saying, whatever you feel is bullshit. When that's the wrong way to approach somebody, because what happens is they stop listening immediately because they're

going to protect that feeling that's given them so much comfort and so much inspiration or whatever. And now you're just, you're just basically telling and selling. Here's the point of view. It's all about science. Go fuck yourself. And I talked to Lawrence Krauss about this. He's a famous physicist and atheist. And I said, Lawrence, if I lose a child, I'm not going to you. I don't know where I'm going. But, but at the end of the day, you may, you may be very insulting toward organized religion. It gives people a feeling. And that feeling can be very helpful to a lot of people. And I'm not going to sit here and try to take that feeling away.

Gun control is a classic example. When a lot of liberals start talking to people who own guns, what really the people who own guns are hearing is they're hearing first, I don't like you. You're a dummy. You like your guns. And you're a primitive caveman. And the minute you come at somebody that way, you are, you are, you're fucked. You're never going to change anybody's mind. What they should be doing is saying, look, at the, at the heart of, for a lot of men, the reason a lot of men have guns in

their closet, including me, is because we want to feel like we can protect the people we love if there's a dangerous, if a motherfucker's coming into my house. That's as basic, that's as caveman as it gets. You're never going to take that away from me. I'm a rational guy. I'm a fair-minded guy. I'm not a murderous guy, but I own guns for that reason. Well, it's that old expression, better to have it and not to need it than to need it and not to have it. Exactly. And if a lot

of gun control advocates would start there and understand that if you own guns, a lot of times the feelings around the reason you own that gun are valid. Start there. Validate my feelings and have respect for where I'm coming from and why

I'm living this way. Then we can have a discussion, not an argument. Then you might be able to at least, if not change my mind, at least be sympathetic to the sense you are trying to make. And on the other hand, the people that are gun advocates need to understand the way other people are perceiving their need to have these guns. That's right. the way other people are perceiving their need to have these guns. That's right. They have this perception that a lot of people have of these cavemen

who just want to halt progress. It's like, you want to take my guns? Come and get them. It's always associated with a southern accent. I was going to say that. That's what it really is. There's this famous Charlie Daniels quote for the Charlie Daniels Band. It was at the end of this Aaron Lewis song. And me and Duncan Trussell went on this rant forever about it.

You know, it was like, I love my God. I love guns. I love my country. And anybody who wants to change that, you've got to come through me. And we started laughing about the fact, this thought process of someone who says something like that. It's like, anybody who wants to change that, this idea of changing things. I love God. I love guns.

You want to change? You've got to come through me. We started, I love being a single-celled organism down here on the ocean floor. Anybody who wants to change that, you've got to come through me. And we went on this long rant. I like being a carbon-based molecule. Anybody who wants to change that, you've got to come through me. And we went on this long rant. I like being a carbon-based molecule. Anybody wants to change that, you got to come through me. This idea of changing things being a bad thing.

Sure. And that's one of the things that people associate with when it comes to gun advocates. Like people that are into guns. That you're just into this hickish sort of like we're going to... You're simple. You're simple. Simple. They give you a southern accent and all of we're gonna you're simple simple yeah they give you a southern accent and all of a sudden now you're simple exactly like charlie daniels type it's prejudice

it's a form of bigotry it's a form of bigotry but it's also you got to realize that the people that are gun control advocates have to be aware of this perception yeah and you have to be aware of those aspects of one of the reasons why people do like guns. There is, there is that aspect of it. There's a part you can find people like that. It is, it is an aspect of that culture and you got to kind of denounce that as well as explain, explain and express to the best of your ability why you think it's not a good idea to take all the guns away. You know, despite all the different things you could throw against it, like people in Europe who have less guns and less violence and people, like, I read this thing, like, that cops in March in America killed more people than police in England have since 1900.

Wow. It's fucking, you read shit like that, it's hard to argue for cops having guns. But there's a lot of other variables, man. There's a lot of other shit going on there. We have always been, you know, this country was founded by pioneers. This country's

mythology is wrapped around the idea that you solve your problems violently. Think about every movie star hero we have. You know, now you make lots of money with a movie as you have a guy with a gun killing bad guys or some kind of a weapon.

Spendables. Yeah, yeah. I mean, you know. Fast and the Furious. It's ingrained in the American character. Yeah. I'm not saying that can't change. I'm not saying that can't change. I'm not saying it isn't changing.

It's also cathartic. I think there's a lot of that that keeps us from doing actual violence. A hundred percent. They did a study on these horror shows like Saw and all these movies that might be playing a factor in the lessening of horrific, sadistic crimes. Because serial killers, you get off on that, can get their fix off of watching these shows. But not for everybody.

For some people, it inspires them. And those are probably not the norm. But the problem is, those get pointed at. It's like people with guns that go in and shoot up schools. The amount of people that have guns that don't shoot up schools, my God. What a difference. What a difference. You know, the statistics are weird, man.

Because if you look at the statistics, it's like you would say, well, hey, man, if people have guns, you know, they could possibly go and do something horrific like the guy went to the colorado movie theater and start shooting everybody yeah although i have to say that for me what would have and i thought that the nra the president of the nrf i think that's what he was the way he's phrased is probably not a good idea he wasn't being very sensitive but right after adam lonza killed all those poor children he said the way you stop a bad guy with a gun is a good guy with a gun and i i have to say he could have been a little more sensitive but you know if somebody in that movie theater had had a fucking gun or somebody in that school had a gun it's true that's the way you stop that guy otherwise you are a sitting duck and and i and i i don't know the alternative if you want to get rid of

all guns good luck in this country well i don you know how you physically do that there's not a black and white on this thing no and that's that's a problem that we have we're always looking for who's right and who's wrong there's a very complex issue it has to do with security it has to do with physical security the security of your own body taking, and it also has to do with privacy, like, it has to do with personal liberties, like, who can tell you that you can't do this? Who can tell you you can't, well, you tell me I can't kill someone with a baseball bat?

No, it's just, you can do it more effectively with a gun, so you can't have a gun. A gun's only purpose is for this. You know, and we have these, you know, hard lines, because if there was only a couple of us I always boil it down to this and it's not the best

analogy but there's some validity to it if there was only 10 people on the planet and one of us wanted to have a gun and we all got along and the other people were like or one of us out of those 10 was like hey man if you have a gun I'm going to fucking lock you up in jail

you shouldn't be allowed to have a gun if you have a gun, I'm going to fucking lock you up in jail. You shouldn't be allowed to have a gun. Nobody should have a gun. And then the other people are like, well, who the fuck are you to say that we can't have a gun? You know, like, if there's only two people, and one person wants to, you know, think of any civil liberty, or, you know, personal liberty. One person wants to be able to drink.

The other person goes, hey man, I want to be around you when you're drunk. Well, then don't be around me when I'm drunk. You can't tell me what to do with my body. I can do whatever the fuck I want. But then you get a bunch of people and they start passing laws and they start regulating, okay, if you have this substance, we have the right to lock you in a cage. If you have this item on you, is your knife over six inches long? Is your gun over X caliber? You know, you're going to have to get special paperwork. I'm going to make sure that you have a need for this item. And that's, people have a problem with those things because those, one human being telling another human being what they can or can't do. That was always, who governs,

who is governing, who governs, who is governing rights? Who governs the governor is the biggest question in political theory. But also, that hinges, the question that you're talking about always has hinged on, you have a right to your private property and speak in your mind, etc. But where the debate hinges on, at what point are you trampling on other people's rights? And the famous case is, yes, I have freedom of speech,

but it doesn't mean I can get into a crowded movie theater and scream fire. If you do that, what happens is you could cause a stampede and people could die. And so, Maya Angelou very famously said to these guys, these KKK guys that were marching through the streets, they said, well, it's freedom of speech.

And Maya Angelou said, yes, it's true. You should have a right to your own freedom of expression. I think, though, we should have a debate on it, because where that ends should be when you are inciting someone else to kill or to hang me. Right. Freedom of speech does not mean freedom of the consequences of your speech. Yeah. Freedom from the consequences of your speech.

That's always been the debate. And you can get pretty heavy into that debate. Yeah. I think when you use a gun and you harm people, most certainly you should lose your rights to use a gun and possibly lose your life. Yeah. Depending upon what you've done with that gun. Those laws are on the books, by the way. You want to go to In-N-Out?

Yeah, I do. Let's do it. I do want to go to In-N-Out. I love the fact that we could just see that. Yeah, America. There's nothing like In-N-Out, by the way. This is so much better, by the way, than hunting. Yeah.

Hey, guys. If we wanted to have a meal right now and we had to go fucking drum it up in the forest. Oh, God. We'd be so hungry. Hey, want to catch some snails? It would suck. Isn't that funny? Like, we're going to end this podcast, this podcast, driving on the way to hunting, stopping in the middle of some

fucking cow town and eating an In-N-Out burger. My buddy told me, my buddy RS1 Survivor, and he was telling me how he at one point, Survivor, and he was telling me how he at one point, it was raining and he was so cold and hungry, he just put his head in his hands and just started to cry. And then he would, I said, what did you do all day? He goes, I would just

spend all day looking for snails and snakes, and I would eat snails and snakes. This might be the only In-N-Out I've ever seen that doesn't have a line. That is kind of crazy. They don't have a line out here. There's no one here. This is weird. This is a goddamn

ghost town In-N-Out burger. Alright, folks. We're going to cut this podcast off right here. Maybe we'll do more because we can fucking talk up a storm. This Brian Callen and I. So until then, go fuck yourself. We'll see you soon. Big kiss.

Thank you, everybody, for tuning into the podcast. And thank you to our sponsors. Thanks to Anna.com. Go to O-N-N-I-T. Use the code word ROGAN and save 10% off any and all supplements. Thanks also to Silicon Valley. Silicon Valley, which starts season two this Sunday, April 12th, on HBO.

God damn it. Do I have to tell you again, you motherfuckers? Go watch Silicon Valley because it's a fucking awesome show. It's at 10 p.m. 10 p.m. Sunday on HBO or you can watch it on HBO Now. Thanks also to NatureBox. Go to naturebox.com forward slash Rogan and get your free child box of yummy and delicious snacks.

That's naturebox.com forward slash Rogan. All right, my friends, I know've been uh slacking off on the podcast lately but i've just been uh busy with life and taking a little bit of a break just recharging the old batteries but i'm coming back strong so uh thank you for everything thank you guys for all the cool shit you tweet me thank you for all the kind words and uh all the it's all the inspiration and just all the positive vibes man uh much love and talk to you soon big kiss