The Jordan Harbinger Show - 141: Jason Khalipa | Going from Zero to Hero in the New Year

Episode Date: January 1, 2019

Jason Khalipa (@JasonKhalipa) is a CrossFit Games world champion, the founder of NCFIT, and author of As Many Reps As Possible. What We Discuss with Jason Khalipa: You don't have to start out with "The Right Stuff" to accomplish great things. Is your confidence earned or perceived? Are you surrounding yourself with the right connections to succeed? Are you just talking about the things you want to do, or are you taking actionable steps to accomplish them? Can you take a joke and use it to make your life better? Jason Khalipa has -- and he can tell you how. And much more... If you're only going to take one gluten and dairy-free, keto, paleo, and vegan-friendly supplement to boost energy, balance nutrition, and aid digestion, then Athletic Greens -- with its 76 natural ingredients -- is what we recommend. The Jordan Harbinger Show listeners get 23 travel packs (valued at $79) with their first purchase at athleticgreens.com/jordan! Does your business have an Internet presence? Save up to a whopping 62% on new webhosting packages with HostGator at hostgator.com/jordan! Sign up for Six-Minute Networking -- our free networking and relationship development mini course -- at jordanharbinger.com/course!  Like this show? Please leave us a review here -- even one sentence helps! Consider including your Twitter handle so we can thank you personally! Full show notes and resources can be found here.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Welcome to the show. I'm Jordan Harbinger. As always, I'm here with my producer, Jason DeFilippo. Now, some people you meet just give off a vibe. There's something about them that indicates there a fountain of energy and intensity. When this is mixed with a winning attitude, the combination can be unstoppable. And when I first met Jason Kalipa, I saw it immediately. He's won the CrossFit games. He started a highly successful business with dozens of locations, and he's bringing a lot of lessons learned along the way to the show here today. What I love about Jason is he didn't start off with the right stuff. He wasn't focused, he wasn't driven, he had poor grades in school.

He's really an example of how someone can wake up, snap out of it, work really hard, stay focused and consistent, turn things around and discover what he or she is actually really capable of. Today we'll dig deeper into Jason's story and learn how he developed a drill so we can surround ourselves with the right people and what that looks like in practice. We'll discuss why focusing only on what we can control. not only keeps our head in the game, but also relieves stress, anxiety, and FOMO, fear of missing out, and we'll discuss how to sit down and reevaluate your path in life, and more importantly,

when you should sit down and take the time to do this in order to avoid spending time working towards the wrong outcomes. Getting to know, Jason, during this interview is really enjoyable, and I hope you'll find value in it as well. If you want to know how I managed to book all these great guests and manage all my relationships with entrepreneurs, show guests, people I've run into show fans, et cetera. I've got systems and tiny habits. It just takes me a few minutes a day. I'm teaching you how to do this for free. Check out level one over at Jordan Harbinger.com slash level one. All right. Here's Jason Kalipa. So you weren't the best student, which I think is interesting in school. You were like, I mean, what were you thinking at that time? Were you

thinking like, I'm never going to use any of this stuff? No, I mean, like, if you're talking about high school, Yeah. I just, I was never really inspired by school. I was more inspired by like after school activities. You know, like I like playing sports. I like partying. I mean, I would spend a lot of time doing that. I was more like the entertainer, the class clown.

And so I never really took school to heart. Like, one of the things I think is really interesting is like in school, everybody starts off with an A and, you know, it's your job to kind of maintain it. I never really maintain an A, but I stayed close. So I got, you know, Bs or whatever. but like once I got out of school and I started going to college, I started to realize like in the real world, you don't start off with an A, like you start off with nothing and you got to work your way up.

And so, yeah, in high school I really wasn't, I just wasn't a good student. And I think it was because I was all fired up about more like connections like outside of school. And then in school, I was just kind of like a class clown. And looking back on it, it was really unfortunate. I wish I had spent more time dedicated in there.

But yeah, I didn't. So was there intensity anywhere in your life or were you just kind of like loafing across the board? I was loafing in school. There was intensity in terms of my relationship, like with my girlfriend the time, I was very focused on that and obviously playing sports. But in school, it just was such a low priority for me. I would just do whatever I could to get by. What is your, you married the girl that you were getting in high school.

So your wife, what was she thinking of you at this point? Like, you know? I think she was, I think she liked. me because I treated her well. I, you know, she was like, so funny story, the day I met my wife, we were in like algebra class or something. We were 15. And I, I walk up to her and we meet each other. I go home and like, hey, mom, I met the girl I'm going to marry. Well, we ended up dating. You said the day you met her? First day. That's incredible. So did your mom be like, what was your mom's like, oh, you know, like, yeah, son. Sure thing. And so I go back and we ended up dating. So we date for

two weeks. Okay. And at this time, this was like my first girlfriend, like, you know, I was like head over heels. Man. So we date for two weeks and then she dumps me. Okay. And she dumped me because I was too nice. And like what I think it was, it wasn't that I was being too nice.

It was that I was trying to be like overly something I wasn't like over the top. Like I never made her feel like she was, it was just too much. Like, oh, let me do this for you. Let me do this for you. Let me do this for you. And she wanted someone to kind of like, not playing hard to get, but just wasn't so like. Yeah, you were super needy. Yeah. And so we ended up dating for two weeks. We broke up. Then we became friends for a while

for the next like eight months. And then once we started dating again, that was it. What do you mean that was it? You were like, you're not leaving me again. Yeah. Basically, I learned how to better treat like a woman, not in the sense like I ever treated her poorly, but I learned that there's like, don't be something you're not and just be yourself, but also treat her right. but don't be like overbearing because she wanted to kind of feel like it was more, I don't know what exactly she wanted, but at the time, I learned

a relationship as being her friend. Then once you became friends, you get to know I'm on a real level, and then we just stuck together ever since. Yeah, it sounds like in the beginning, you put her up here and you treated her like that and that made her uncomfortable, and you're trying to seek her approval the whole time.

And then he became friends, and you're like, well, that's not going to happen. She's like, oh, the real you is great. Right. And then you didn't feel like you needed to do impress her all the time because you're our friends. Yeah. And then once you became friends, you get to know her on, again, like that, like a neutral level, right? Yeah. Yeah. The playing field is then even because you don't need anything or want anything

from her. You're just friends. Yeah. But I mean, we had a very interesting high school. Her dad was, he came from Iran, so to my dad. And they both grew up with a different set of kind of rules in terms of male, female. So he was extremely protective, very. Yeah. I can imagine. Like no going out, nothing. And so like she would, she would sneak out of. of her house and I'd go pick her up in the middle of the night and it was just it was not good good karma on that later on life with our kids I have yeah good luck with that that's how everyone we that's my dad's are the way they are because they're like I hope he's not like me when I was a teenager because I'm keeping an eye on that kid if he is they must have also been worried that

you were just screwing around in school yeah I mean I think at the time like I probably wasn't the best example I mean I again I was playing sports and stuff and I was getting by in school but I you know like leading out of high school all my friends including my wife went to four year universities and she got accepted to sancle university which is where my mom my dad and my sister went so i thought i was going to go there but then i didn't get in and then i applied again i didn't get in and then i applied a couple more times and finally got my stuff together at a junior college and i went and met her then we both graduate at the same time but like i always wondered like what her dad was thinking because coming out of high school like i didn't have i mean i was working at the time

which was good, but I don't know, I think he was working. And I had started a clothing company that failed, and I'd done some stuff that failed, but I don't think he knew all that. All he cared about was like, what school is he going to? And he's going to a junior college. Like, ah, you know. Yeah, I knew it. Yeah.

Yeah. I'm wondering, the reason I'm asking you this is, well, one, it's a good way to get to know you. But two, you started a chain of gyms that's really successful. You won the CrossFit games in 2008. So you're not like some schmo who can't get his stuff together. you just didn't try it yeah i i didn't try i didn't find something that made me like want to have a deeper internal like reason to try and so when i got to junior college you really woke me up you know it was like no one cares about me like no one owes me anything if i want to be successful and if i want to

get to sankey university with the rest of my friends i need to i need to make it happen because they're not just going to give it to me and so that was really when when it stemmed that like in in high school i didn't have like this deep internal drive because i didn't really have a strong reason in a strong why. Then when I got to junior college and my why was debut with my friends and my wife at Santa Cruz, that's when I put my stuff together and that's when I started going to work. What did it feel like when you tried to get into college and they're like, hey, we're going to Santa Clara and you're like, I didn't get in twice? Yeah, so I didn't get in out of high school. Yeah. And then I went to junior college. Then I applied again, didn't get in. I applied again.

I didn't get in. And then finally, I believe it was my fourth try that I got accepted. It was humiliating, you know, and also, it's oddly enough, I got invited to be on our, I'm getting inducted in our athletic high school Hall of Fame in like a month. But the same gentleman who's inducting me was also the same gentleman at the commencement, at the graduation speech, who said something that was kind of like humiliating to me. And that was right when I graduated. And that was another thing that kind of sparked this idea that like my friends, my family, my father-in-law, all these people are in the stands and this gentleman said something. It was a joke.

What did he say? He was talking about this movie, The Eternal Sunshine of a Spotless Mind. And he said, no, I'm not talking about Jason Kleepa's brain. Like, he said it in a way where like, because I was a class clown and stuff, like, it got a laugh. But it really humiliated me. Like, I sunk into my seat and I just, it was that combined with going to junior college and recognizing no one cared that really sparked this thing that like, if I want to make

something of myself and get to where my friends are at, I need to, start applying myself. When you say no one cared, you mean like no one's coming to rescue you from this situation? What do you mean by that? Well, I mean, in high school, you figure you have all these, like, teachers who like, you know, I would be in the dean's office all the time. I would have teachers talk to me all the time. They would actually talk to Ashley, who's my wife, to have her, like, inspire me because they were trying to, like, push me along this process. And there's like a system that almost is ensuring that you get through high school well because it benefits the school and it benefits you. Whereas in junior college, there is no system necessarily. Like, if you want to be in

junior college for 10 years, you could be there. And so that's what I meant was like no one cared. There was no teacher trying to lift me up. There's just another teacher and you're just another student and you got to lift yourself up. I know there was a girl in one of your junior college classes that said something that also lit a fire under you. Do you remember this? Yes. I mean, in high school, it was that, it was that commencement speech, which I had never really talked about before until now. But in junior college, you know, we're going through the first day of class. And at the time, you know, I showed up to this place. It was called West Valley. And I kind of felt like, you know, like, all right, I'm coming out high school. It was a popular guy. Yeah.

Then you get there and you're just another number. And we're going around the school. It's like, hey, my name is John. I've been here for a year. My name is this. I've been here for this. And it finally got around at the woman said next to me. And the woman says, hi, my name is Mary. And this is my seventh year at the school. And that's really when it just hit me. Like, I don't want to be the guy who's sitting here seven years from now. I need to take responsibility for myself. So I went to the counselor office and I just like, how do I get the hell out of here?

So I took summer classes, this, that, and everything I could. Did you say I got to get out of here? Yeah, oh yeah, walked in there. I mean, I was just like fired up. And I was like, I got to get out of here. And so then we started put together a plan. And, you know, the plan worked out. I mean, I got out of there in two years and graduated from college in four.

but it was because I had to kind of have these situations that kind of got me inspired. And then that transferred into other things in my life, right? So then that same year when I graduated from high school, I started working full time. I was working full time, going to school full time, and trying to build something, build something. And then it created this work ethic that allowed me to then win the cross-a-games, build a business, because of those experiences. So I don't regret them. It was just hard to be fair, maybe Mary had kids and no family to help. take care of them. I was working two jobs. But it didn't really matter, right? Because what you were

thinking was, I'm straight out of high school. I should be, I have a lot of opportunity here. Yeah. And Mary being there for seven years, that's fine. But like my thing is, that wasn't for me. Like if I was going to be in school for seven years, I need to be getting a doctor. I was going to say, you're maybe in a PhD program. Yeah. And maybe for that person at that point, maybe they had dripped it off and then they came back to school and maybe that was a big deal. But for me, seven years just wasn't in alignment with what I wanted to do. Did you know what you wanted to do at that time other than get out of there? No, I just wanted to get out of it.

Okay, that makes sense. But that was good enough at the time. Because my internal drive was to get with my girlfriend, get with my friends, at St. Crohn's University because that's what everybody else was doing. And I felt like, because in high school, I was on the same track as everybody. Right? Like, everybody was equal. Yeah.

Then once I didn't get accepted in the college I wanted, I kind of fell behind, then once I realized that like everybody else is in these four-year with these things going on, I felt like I was kind of an outsider. Yeah. I got FOMO. Were you ever worried, like, oh, crap, Ashley's going to find somebody else? I'm at this junior college. She's at this other place.

It wasn't necessarily that I thought she was going to find somebody else, but it was like I wanted to be a better version of myself for her initially, and which is now carried over in other things. Sure, that makes sense. I would be freaking out if my girlfriend was at a four-year college, a bunch of people that were like had worked harder than me. That would be, that would keep me up at night too. Yeah, because they got there and I hadn't.

Yeah. And I would imagine at some point you looked around, went, wait, these are not my peers. I can do better than this. Exactly. Yeah. Yeah. And it's not like, I'm not hating on people that go to junior college. Of course, man. Because it got me to where I wanted to go. But what I needed to know is that this was a time of my life where I needed to take ownership that I had failed to get to where I wanted to get to and I needed to put in the work to get there. Yeah. And the people around me, there were some of them. They were in that same boat. There's other ones that were just kind of drifting. And that's okay. But I didn't want to be in that category.

Yeah, you, you for the first time, because when you're in high school or when you're in the first situation, you can kind of lie to yourself and go, I'm in the same class with all these overachievers. But then once they get selected over here and you get deselected, you're like, oh, wait a minute. Yeah. This is the wake up call where I can no longer convince myself that this guy who works this hard and me are basically in the same place. You're not. Like the fates slash admissions committee has decided that you don't make the and they do. Right.

And then, you know, I learned a really valuable lesson there where I didn't get accepted once, didn't get accepted twice, three times. I learned a really valuable lesson that, and this is something I hope someone could take away, is that I graduate from high school and I go to this junior college, and I really put in the work. I mean, I was working full time. I was studying hard. I was getting great grades. I was really putting it together because I need to get a certain GPA that then basically

after two years of junior college, it offsets your high school. It's no longer, they don't look at your high school transcripts anymore. Sure. The problem was up until that point, even if I had gotten a 4.0 at junior college, they still looked at my high school transcript because I hadn't gotten two years of credits in. So I worked really hard for like six months. I applied again. And I didn't get into Santa Clara. It was a really valuable lesson for me that six months of hard work can't make up for four years of lack of hard work. And that was a really cool thing to realize that this consistency piece need to keep going, that you can't just work hard for a

month or two and expect to make up for years of not working as hard. And that was a valuable lesson that I learned in that experience. That's a good point. I want to talk about the shortcuts people take as well, because I think there's a lot of, especially young people now, entrepreneurship and being your own boss, whatever, it's really trendy. So you get these guys and gals who are like 21, they don't have any real skills because they never built them. And then suddenly they're like, I'm going to be a coach or a consultant. It's like, wait a minute. What are you doing? Right. And they're trying to do this thing where they took a couple online classes. They watched a lot of Gary Vaynerchuk videos.

Now they're like ready to be self-employed. But they never did anything to build the skill set to build the value in the first place. So I think that's an important thing. So I talk about something called Earned versus Perceived Confidence that I learned through competing in CrossFit. Where, or let's just take, for example, a really easy analogy, self-defense or boxing. Sure. I could go into a ring with Floyd Mayweather and tell. tell myself all I want, slap myself in the face, get excited that I am going to go ahead

and win around against him. But chances are that he has earned confidence from decades starting boxing when he was a young kid that make him go in there and just feel very comfortable because he could rely on his background and he has earned confidence, not this perceived. So with me when I was competing, every day I was putting in the work because I wanted to have, I wore a wristband at the cross games that said earned. Meaning no one gave me this. I earned the right to be there through hard work.

And I think when you're a business owner, I think it's really important to take a step back for a second before you start a business, just say, hey, did I earn the right to kind of open it? What is my competitive advantage? Why am I going to win? And if you have that, great. But if you're just telling yourself you want to open it or telling yourself you want to give other people advice, but you don't really have that confidence from a background of years, it's kind of tough. And eventually, I think that'll actually do a disservice because you're kind of putting on a front,

you don't have a foundation to build off of. Yeah. People right now, though, they say fake it till you make it, which kind of, I mean, it could work, I suppose, and if you're faking confidence to go up and talk to somebody that you like or you're going up to give a speech, but it won't work over a long-term period. Well, like we say, like any shortcut eventually will have some type of repercussion somewhere. And you might not know it at first. You might not even know it for a year, but eventually you'll find out. I'll give an example. I know a friend of mine who got put into. to a CFO position without truly like having the background, but he got it because the company

needed it, et cetera. Well, with that came a title and a salary. So he adjusted his lifestyle based off the salary and the title, right? But when the company recognized that he might not been the best fit, they let's just say let him go. Now when he's going for a new position, he's looking for what? He's looking for a CFO position with a similar salary range. But if he didn't have the actual background or the capabilities to earn that title and that salary, now of a sudden he's in a very challenging situation because he's created a lifestyle for himself and a mindset where he thinks he's something, but the society doesn't necessarily agree with that. That's a very odd dynamic.

That's got to be, you've got to swallow the ego at that point. That's right. That's a tough pill to swallow. Yeah, and some people can say maybe the business didn't have a disservice by elevating him. Who cares? It's his problem. It's his problem. Yeah, it's his problem.

You're listening to the Jordan Harbinger show with our guest, Jason Kalipa. We'll be right back. Don't forget we have a worksheet for today's episode so you can make sure you solidify your understanding of the key takeaways from Jason Kalipa. That link is in the show notes at Jordan Harbinger.com slash podcast. Thanks for listening and supporting the show. To learn more about our sponsors and get links to all the great discounts you just heard, visit Jordan Harbinger.com slash deals.

If you'd like some tips on how to subscribe to the show, just go to Jordan Harbinger.com slash subscribe. And if you're listening to this show in Overcast, please hit the little star button. It really helps us out. back to our show with Jason Kalipa. I know that you got out of junior college and you started working really hard, but I want to talk about how you did that because you mentioned, well, I got a bunch of mentors.

I sought advice from people. A lot of, how do you go about finding these people and getting their help? Because a lot of people are asking me, how do I find in career relationships with mentors? Do you have a process for this or was it just like? I was really blessed where I found like in high school, I found guys who were doing things that I wanted to do in college. So when I graduated in high school and I got into college, I had these guys who really took me underneath their wing at the gym,

and they were doing things that I was inspired by. They taught me how to run a business. But I think I got lucky. But if I were to give any advice to people, what I would think about is, like, in your circle of friends, there's some people you align with more, there's some people you align less with. And so my recommendation would be to find people in your network

that want to raise the bar. They might not be doing exactly what you want to do, but maybe they have the same ethos. the same desire to improve themselves, the same whatever. And just connect with them and go get coffee. And even if they're outside your industry, if they're trying to better themselves, better their fitness, I'd find people who have similar interests,

create like a coffee on a month to month on like a monthly basis, and just talk about stuff because that's how I get inspired is like building off the energy from somebody else. And like when they're trying to raise the bar, so do I. So I got lucky finding my mentors, but I think if I were to find ones today, it's as you create like your circle, find people that align with your core values

and start actually reaching out to set up meetings with them. Because I think you learn not just about the business, but about other stuff too, you know, like maybe relationships or whatever maybe. It's helpful to be around, I do this actually. It's helpful to be around people that think similarly but have different systems. So I hate the word mastermind

because it's one of those like circles or kind of things that everyone's selling right now. And usually it's be around somebody with a bunch of Instagram followers for 20K a year, but that's not what I'm talking about. But like a couple of friends of mine who are successful business owners, but in very different niches, we get together every month, either on a Zoom call or in person. And we discuss things like how we're feeling with our relationships, how the business is going, what we're doing to generate more of it, are we aligning our values properly?

Like how are we feeling? Are we feeling good about where we're headed? We're feeling bad. and that was something that I thought, I guess we'll do, I'll try this and see how it works. It's one of the most high-valued things because somebody will say, why are you doing that? And I'll go, well, because this other guy was doing it. And they're like, forget that. Your core strength is I see it as this.

Stick to this. This is what you're really good at. You have room to grow here. Hire someone else for that. And it's like, oh, yeah, I didn't think about that. Because they've gone through this deliberative process maybe like three years ago or maybe three months ago, but they already did a ton of thinking about that. Yeah, or you just meeting with people who have a difference perspective on you.

Like, you might think you're really good at something, but if the groups, like actually your strong suit is here, then it just kind of opens your eyes. But I think sometimes you don't even have those conversations, you can't recognize it. Yeah. That's one thing I, you know, I'm so blessed to have my wife. I got a really early on with the business,

we started collaborating. We started talking about things I was good at, wasn't good at, and try to delegate out. Now, that's been a whole learning experience myself. I bet, yeah. I'm laughing because I can imagine I work with my wife too so it's it's fun sometimes to be like we're going to do this we're going to do this and then you just get like a come on man yeah hello is this thing on yeah are you crazy right and you're like oh sorry I've been watching too much YouTube videos

of entrepreneur stuff and they get to get you have to somebody like shake you out of it yeah like I was really fired up for like a week on doing a coffee and wine bar so creating this creating this location where it's coffee in the morning and wine at night. Because you figure coffee bars are kind of dead in the evening. Wine bars are kind of dead in the morning. It's both. It's genius. But then my wife had to kind of like, you know, hey, you're a fitness guy.

Stick to your niche. Yeah. Stick to what you know. Yeah, you can invest in a restaurant later on if you want to. If you really want to lose money, you can invest in a restaurant later on down the line. Right. But in the meantime, get your core income stable for your family. That's probably wise.

Yeah. Very wise. Man, she must be really. proud of you where you are now, knowing you in high school. Yeah. One thing's for sure. Like, we've truly, like, grown and developed together. So it's been, it's been a fun experience because she knew me when I wasn't as motivated. Then I got inspired, motivated. And then, then I had to learn how to not be selfish with my motivations. Okay. I had to learn how to talk with her more. Like, so for example, like my wife and I've gone through our fair share of adversity in competition and

with our daughter being diagnosed leukemia. I mean, these are like, real adversities that we've had to overcome. And I think one of the key things there is to recognize when I was being selfish in my endeavors and what impact that actually had on her and the family. And that really created through conversation. I didn't realize it until later on every year I would ask you like, hey, are you ready for another commitment? Because it was a commitment that we made for the CrossFit games.

It wasn't a commitment that I just made because we had two kids, we have this or that. When I commit to it, well, what that means, I'm gone four hours a day training alone, not to mention the business, so on those different things. so it had as much strain on her as it did on me, if not more, because now she's at these events, it's completely outside of her control, and she's seeing her husband struggling. And so something I've learned over time was how to not be selfish and always engage with her and hear her side, because if she's not on board, it's never going to do well because there's going to be an underlying resentment.

So when it comes to business, I'll give you another example. About a year ago, I talked to my wife. I'm like, listen, Ava's doing better, the business is doing well. we could stay where we're at right now. We're making a good living. Like, we're good. But I'd like to try and see what we're capable of. I'd like to see if we could take this into another level

and not have any regrets that we didn't reach our full potential. Are you on board? She's like, yeah, I'm on board. And so now we set the expectation that we're going to work together to work hard instead of me just going out and doing something because then she's not going to have as much resentment when I have to travel to Asia for a new opening of location because we had that communication.

Do you have to do that every time you have a major life change? Because this is really apropos for me right now, right? like, Jen's over here on the floor, switching cameras and handling some real-time audio stuff. And I'm like, uh-oh, when's the last time I asked her if she was on board? I don't know when that was. I'm pretty sure I was just like, hey, get on board. And that was like three years ago. We've been doing that ever since.

Right, because in the beginning, you just do what you got to do to get it kind of going. Yeah. And then over time, you know, I think for me is it happens major life events, right? Or major, like, for example, every year. So in like 2013, 2014, we're like really big years for our family. We had our son in 2014. We already had a daughter. I got back on the podium at the crosswood games both those years.

And our business grew globally. And so we had multiple locations. There was a lot of moving parts. And every year I'd ask her, hey, are you ready for the commitment? And then finally, in like 13, she's like, hey, I think I have one more year. So I'm like, 14. I'm going to it thinking maybe this is my last year as an individual. And I competed.

I got back on the podium. It was a good finish. And then after the games, I'm like, hey, are you ready for another year? And she's like, I don't think I'm ready. She's like, I can't do it anymore. You know, right? She just said, like, I can't do anymore. So she actually made me sign an agreement with her that said I wouldn't compete as an individual anymore.

And so I went team because she wasn't ready to make that commitment. It made me not ready for that commitment because I knew that that was really important to me. Because if she's not happy, then I'm not going to be happy, right? Yeah. So then I switched to go team. And that was an important reevaluation. that I had to have. Then the next year, when Ava got sick, I stopped competing. I want to talk about that in a second, but I'd love to go back to the reevaluation.

How do you go about this? Because I think every time we have a major life change, you have a new kid, you have a major career shift. I mean, this kind of defined the whole year for me personally. I had a major career shift where I ended up getting ejected from an old company and starting a new company. And in the beginning, it was really terrifying. Of course, now, I've never actually been happier, and it was the best thing that could have happened. We ended up with Apple's best of 2018, which was kind of like mind-blowing. But in the beginning, it was like, this is the worst year ever. Of course.

What are we going to do? Re-evaluating makes a lot of sense. Do you sit down and go, let's get out of paper and pen and write down what we're going to like? What is this process like? Are you just in the car and you're like, hey, are we going to do this major thing this year? And she's like, nah, I've been thinking about it, not really into it. Yeah, I mean, I think it's a little bit more.

than that. So like on a regular basis, there's like these micro check-ins, right? Whether that's like, you know, we're just having dinner and just be like, hey, so how are things going? What do you think about the kids? Are we doing good? You know, like, do micro-check-ins, like, just like checking in. And those happen on a pretty consistent basis. But then every now and then, when like, after the CrossFit games occurred, that was a major time where I had to, hey, let's, right now I'm still this high, let's sit down a month from now and really talk about next year, right? So then what happens in CrossFit is I would compete in multiple events from the open regionals, the CrossFit, and I would get invited to go represent Team USA in this invitational.

That's all like a whole part of a series. And what I would do is, is after the invitational, we would sit down and say, hey, are we ready again for another year? And that would be a deliberate time we would sit down, hey, like on Friday, let's go to dinner, and let's just go talk about it. And then we'd have a long conversation with the pros and cons. But we had to have the awareness. I had to have the awareness that I need to have that conversation and we didn't have the awareness together

to be open and honest to that conversation. Yeah. I'm looking forward to doing this with Jen at some point. maybe over the holidays here because I don't think we've ever really done that. I think she's just been really cool about doing what I feel like I need to do and that's going to change pretty soon. And you have to go into it with a place of like care and trust with each other. And you might even have someone else that comes in and helps mediate it a little bit,

just like having a good conversation. It's not like you're going, because when the times are good, you want to go over these conversations that when times are bad, you already have this built-in beautiful foundation of communication that then carries itself so well. Is that why you were able to, or how you were able to deal with your daughter being diagnosed with leukemia? Because you mentioned that earlier. It seems like that's something that's very traumatizing for a family. Yeah.

I mean, I don't have to tell you this. Yeah, I mean, no, it is traumatizing. But I think what helped us with it is all these years of overcoming adversity. So you go to the cross-the-games, you get your butt kicked. But your wife would also get her buck kicked because you're getting your butt kicked, right? Like, she feels what I feel only from like an outsider's perspective looking in. And so she had to learn to overcome that. And so did I through communication with each other.

Well, when Ava got sick, it was a really great test of all these years of competing, learning how to overcome these challenges through communication, through whatever. Then we then transferred those skills, which these skills were built in like a very like, you know, look, if you win or lose across the games, it's a competition. There's money in the line, sure. but it's not life and death. It is what it is. But when you talk about this challenge in the hospital, the stakes are significantly higher. And so I'm so grateful for the competition experience because it taught my wife and I how to work together. And when we had to come against adversity,

it was great to see the way we both reacted to it. I'm curious, are there more takeaways from that that you want to get into? Or is that essentially the communication was the crux of it? I think the really the biggest takeaway, there was a few takeaways from the whole. So she went through treatment for two and a half years. We spent months in the hospital, ISU, you name it, right? I think the major takeaways, like, if you could summarize, like, these two and a half years and, like, a few things is, like, is that you should do everything in your power today to build a hedge financially, emotionally, and physically.

so that if something does take you out of your loop, you're best prepared to attack it. And that's what the book is about. It's about how do you have good communication, develop these skills where you're present and focused with your loved ones to have a really strong relationship so that when it gets tested, you're in the best position to be successful. How do you stay focused on work so you can build up a business

or work hard so you become such a good employee that your work will be supportive if something happens to you? And then finally, how can you improve your fitness to a point if you can't work out for months, you're still okay. And so I think that was one big takeaway from being in the hospital so much is that we had done a good job of developing this. So when this news did come, we were able to focus on one thing and one thing only, which was getting her better.

I also think that through that we recognize the importance of family, right, that the family support allowing my wife and I to go out for date nights during that time. And like family becomes even more and more important to me. And I think that anybody who doesn't at least work to try and create a relationship with their family should maybe try a little bit more because you never, those are the people that are going to have your back when it happens. And then finally, I think the biggest thing that it taught us was that the world has a lot of different challenges for a lot of different people. And I think at the time, we think that whatever is happening in our day is like the biggest problem in the world. I think we need to have a little bit more perspective that there's a lot of people going through much worse. And we need to be grateful for what we have and focus on the positive things and not just the negative.

And I think we learned that skill in the hospital. Like, today has been a good day because we only had three pokes today instead of 20. Or she didn't get put to sleep today. So today is a good day because it's all perspective. And I think people could take them into their daily lives that maybe they run out of gas. By the end of the day, they have a car, right? Like, you know what I mean? It's just the frame of mind.

Is this just an exercise at looking at the positive? Because I would imagine you were pretty upset. Your wife was probably pretty scared and upset. But you can't really show that in front of your daughter's like five. How old was she? Four and a half. Four and a half. So, yeah, you can't really be like, we're really sad because this is really serious.

Yeah, there is no sadness. It was just, I mean, like I mentioned, the book, like the first night that it was diagnosed, you know, Ashley just said, hey, look, you go tell the family, this was going on. But from this day forward, like, when people walk into the room, it's going to be nothing of positivity. Because we believe that positivity breeded positivity, and we wanted that surrounding her. And so if you're having dark times, you can go have that to yourself, but just outside the room. And that was tough for us, right?

There was a lot of, you know, challenging moments, but I think we stuck true to that for the whole time, which I think was really powerful. Did she not know what was going on because you guys were so positive about it, or did she have an idea? Well, we got to determine how we distribute that information. So there was a lot of great books.

So the nice she was diagnosed I read everything I could find. I mean, as, you know, as much as I could. And I continue to read. There was a lot of great books about losing hair, about, you know, what leukemia is and stuff like that. But you say in such a way where, like, you're a kid, I mean, imagine when you first found out what the word, whatever a word is, your parents got to define how that word was perceived, right?

You didn't have any other perspective on it. So we decided how we wanted to explain what it was, and I think it made it more accessible for her. That makes sense. Okay. I'm curious about that because I don't think many people have an inside look at this. And certainly people who don't understand that this had an effect on your relationship and sort of made you in a way who you are today, I would imagine. Yeah, of course. Yeah, it sort of defines who you are as a parent, which has a heavy influence in how you run your business. Yeah, I mean,

everything changed that night. I remember on social media, I put up this post and it's like life changed. I think at the time, like it was like two in the morning. I was crying. It was a really heavy, heavy post. I didn't really realize at the time, like, it would change my life, not because like, we got through this, right? But just my mental outlook on life and what, the way I want to approach things and the way I want to help people and my bigger vision for why I want to work and why I want to do these things, that all changed. And that was really cool. I don't wish our experience on anybody, not even my worst enemy, but I wouldn't, I'm glad we went through it as a family because it made us a lot closer. You don't seem like the type of guy that

has enemies. I don't have any of it. Yeah. All right. I figured. Yeah, you really don't seem like the type. No, I'm pretty low key. Yeah, yeah. There's certain people where it's like, if they go, oh, I don't like that guy, you're like, hmm, what's wrong with you then? Because everybody likes that guy. I feel like you're one of those. Like, everyone likes you.

If someone's like, oh, yeah, Jason Kalipa, that guy's a, he's a jerk. You're like, oh, man, you're probably not a good person. I don't want to be friends with you. There's something weird about you. I don't see it yet, but that's an indicator. That's a good thing to have people think about you, by the way. Yeah, you're welcome. I think that's, I hope people say that about me, but I highly doubt it.

I highly doubt that. I feel like, I look like the type of guy I could have one or two enemies, for sure. Is it true that you didn't go work in finance because you just had a bad suit on? What's the story behind this? So this is a really interesting story. So when I was in high school, I started a clothing company that failed because I didn't have the earned confidence. I thought I had done a lot of stuff in high school. When I got out, the natural thing throughout college,

was, or excuse me, through college, I started a clothing company. The natural progression for me was to get into a finance job or a sales job or whatever, a job that was typical, right? You get out of college, you make X amount dollars. And I had interviewed a few places. I had been on phone calls, but something just wasn't sitting right. And then really, the defining moment for me was I go into this one meeting and just things were kind of off from the get-go.

They wanted me to put down a sheet of paper like some leads for them to call, which I thought was kind of weird. And I had a really good interview with the woman. Great interview. But I had really tried to look sharp for this interview. Like, I really tried. It wasn't like I just walked in there sloppy. I looked really good.

But I didn't have like one those crisp blazer coats on. So I didn't really have one, like a suit jacket. I was wearing more of like a coat that you would put over a jacket maybe. It wasn't as sharp. And I didn't have like a suit. And I just remember when I left the interview, the woman's like, I really like you. I think you're going to be a phenomenal fit to this company. I want to move you on in the next stage.

But before you meet, can you please dress nicer? That was like the ending thing. And I just left there and I just remembered, like, I didn't want to be judged based on what I looked like, I wanted to be judged based on my work ethic. And I wanted to directly correlate the amount of work I put in with how much money I was making. That's what I liked about sales is that there was no limit.

You just, the more you worked, the better you did. And it was at that moment. I mean, a lot of pieces led up to this. But it was that moment at that day that I called my dad and I was like, we're opening a gym, let's do this. Because of a number of factors, but her comments were the ones that made me realize, I didn't want to be in corporate America.

Now, looking back on that, that was a stupid reason to say, I don't want to have a job, I want to go open up a gym. I would not recommend that to anybody because you shouldn't go open up a business because you didn't want to wear a suit. Right.

That's not good. Okay, good. Clarify that. Yeah. That's a stupid reason. What it did was it sparked an idea in me and made me realize that I didn't want to see myself here years later, but I had had the earned confidence from working at a gym for the last four to six

years learning everything about the business from the owner on, you know, whatever, that allowed me to make that decision better. When I opened the gym, I thought it was because of this, but really what it was was because of this whole background that I was inspired to go change people's lives through fitness. And this was just like kind of like the nail on the coffin to make me go do it. Speaking of decisions, you have this quote from the book that goes to something like if you want something bad enough, you can control the direction of your life with decisions, focus on the very next decision. It sounds pretty obvious when I state it like that.

But what I like is I think a lot of people are waiting for either permission or like, oh, I need to wait for this pivotal moment to kind of like do this. Even if the pivotal moment is small, people go like, you know, I should lose some weight so I should stop eating carrot cake for breakfast. But I'll do that later because it's Christmas and like, you know, there's going to be so opportunities. I'll start working out later. And this is the classic fitness example that everyone has. But we do this in business too. We're like, you know, I really do need to get my branding together. Well, you know what? I really do need to do social. But I'll do it later because right now

I'm focused on this or I need to find out, I need to take classes on how to do that. I need to hire someone for that. And I've been guilty of this too. And there's a difference between staying focused on something and maybe telling yourself that you're going to do something later, but not really having any sort of decision-making process in place. Well, I'm sure you get this all the time. Like, how do I do this? How do I do that? I want to do this.

And the thing about it is, like, you just got to start. You just got to do it. And I think a lot of people love to talk about what they want to do, but never actually take action on it. And I think that your words, that would be backed up by action. I'm a huge believer in this. Like, if I want to do something, like, I'm just going to go out there and do it. Like, we're sitting in this room.

I really wanted to put foam on the ceiling. I just ordered it and did it. Like, because I just think the problem. with it is, is that oftentimes you get caught in this trap, but there's always another thing you want to try and do, but you never actually start anything. And so for me, when I was coming out of college, I was looking at the business. Like, if I wanted to do something, I need to tell myself to go out there and do it. And I don't know exactly where that came from. I don't know where I learned that skill from. Took me a while, I'm sure. But now, if I want something, I need to start

it immediately. An example is working out. A lot of times when people work out, they'll get to the gym kind of lolly gag for a while. And then maybe they'll get motivated. Maybe they won't. Maybe they'll just leave. I mean, I've seen it tons of times. Or maybe they get motivated and they actually work out. But for me, when I walk into the gym from by myself, I'm going to take in a class, I start

a clock. And when that clock hits one minute, I'm going on whatever I'm doing. But I hold myself accountable that when that clock hits a target number, I got to go. It doesn't matter how I feel, doesn't matter what clothes I have on, I got to go. And you'd be amazed at what that does because it gives you a lot. a sense of urgency. And I think if you could take that sense of urgency in other areas of your life and hold yourself accountable to a date and a time, it really helps out. I love this, but it's not

just about taking action on everything because you didn't open that coffee and wine bar. Like, there's a decision-making process in here. You're not just like impulsively doing every single thing, right? Yeah. And that's a good point, too, is that sometimes I'm too impulsive. And so I've had to learn how to have a group of people around me that hold me accountable. Like, for example, in the business, I used to be way impulsive. I used to be so reactive. And I used to just do something, do something, do something. And it was actually a detriment to our business.

Yeah, that's, I'm like that. I'm like that. And people get surprised. If I'd met my wife earlier, I'd be, we'd be having this conversation on my yacht, right? Because she's the one who's like, actually, why don't you look at that?

Well, what if this happens? And I'm like, damn, I was so excited about doing this thing. And she's like, yeah, you just didn't even think about or you only thought about these things or like you didn't think what happens. It's like, well, I thought about that, but that probably won't happen. She's like, but what if it does?

And I'm like, damn, you're right. And so I think there has to be a checks and balance. I think what's been good about our company now is that we had hired a good friend of mine, but also our, basically our CFO, who holds me accountable both sides. Like for me, I want to do everything yesterday. I want to go.

I got to get after it. And I think that's a really good trade to have. But I think him, he's much more reserved, much more like knowing you think this through. and so we kind of play off each other really well. And so I think if you do find yourself as a person who never actually commits and gets anything done, you need to find somebody who can hold you accountable to get them done. And vice versa.

If you're someone who just is reactive, just wants to put it out there, you need to find someone to kind of put you in check a little bit and at least makes you aware of the pros and cons of your decisions. And I wish I had had that earlier in business because it would have solved some of our problems, I think. Yeah. I've definitely gone on massive tangents. And it does get cured with what you talk about in the MREP mentality, which is like finding your why. Yeah.

It sounds cheesy. And when I first heard of this concept from Simon Sinek and other pieces, I was like, whatever. I'm doing this because it's a business. I like it. That's my why. That's not good enough, by the way. You have to find reasons that you're doing something. And again, my accountability or mastermind, whatever you want to call it with my friends,

works really well, what are you working on? I'm like, well, I'm thinking about this and that and social media stuff. and they're like, why? And I'm like, well, if you look at these other people, like, they're doing this, and they got a lot of likes, and there's a lot of audience. And I'm like, is that what you want to do? And I'm like, no, but I have to because of this. And they're like, ah, I think you're going to find out you go down this path.

And you start investing time resources into, like, Instagram, which you secretly hate, which I do, by the way, secretly resent, you know. Yeah, then it's not going to be successful. Yeah. And so the why that I talk about a lot in the book, book, which carried over in a business, was like, it started with competing in CrossFit. If you don't have a strong why and you're trying to compete in a professional sport, I mean, you got big problems because you have to put your body through such terrible

situations that if you don't know why you're doing it, it surely can't be for money and fame. And I think that should translate into other things you're doing. Now, you could have a variety of why. It's like, for example, if you're working at a job and you don't necessarily like the job, well, you know your Y might be you like being able to provide for your family. You might not like your job, and that's okay. Now everybody can love their job, and that's fine. But you need to like the byproduct that it occurs.

And then over time, if you want to shift your profession, that's fine. But the big takeaway there is that you're providing for your family, and that should be a deep internal drive for anybody. I know earlier in the show, we talked about not relying on shortcuts because every shortcut has a hidden cost. Yeah. Let's dive into that a little bit. I think this is the day and age of hacking the system,

and taking this shortcut in 80, 20 or whatever it is that people used to justify taking shortcuts. And what I see as someone who's been in business doing the same thing essentially for 12 years, what I see, it's really tempting to take those shortcuts because you see people taking them and you're like, wow, this person did this in two years. It's taken me 12 years to get there. But then in like three, four years, they're not doing anything. And you're creeping up on them. And then you just sail past them. And they're stuck because they didn't build any foundation. Where have you seen these? didn't cost and shortcuts. Like, how do I know if I have to do things without shortcuts, or is it

just always going to be that way? So one of the reasons why I got inspired originally why I wanted to write this book was because I was traveling a lot. And I would always pick up books at the airport. A lot of them were so anti what I saw in my life, meaning like work less, get paid more. Yeah. Here's a secret to success. And they never really talked about just like rolling up your sleeves, working hard, but not for a month, not for a year, but for years. And that's, what I wanted to originally write about and then it kind of transformed and kind of like when it got sick it kind of transformed a little bit but I think when you talk about these shortcuts I mean I just think it's a fact than in life I don't know if I've ever had a situation

where I knew I was kind of taking a shortcut and it worked out well long term and I think the best example of that is when you buy something that's cheap and you think it's going to be as good as something that's like you know there's a reason why something's more expensive because it was built better it was this and that but you just find the cheap one well long term the cheap one that i in my experience it breaks at this or that and i have to end up spending twice as much then i could have just done it right the first time you know measure twice cut once and i just think that in life in business in particular if it seems too good to be true and if it seems like a shortcut it probably is and it will eventually catch up with you maybe not a year maybe not in five years but eventually

because of this foundation of skills we talk about and there's so many examples of that it's just unbelievable. To take that example of purchasing something, I either get the cheapest thing that will do the job, or I get the most, usually most expensive, highest quality, most badass one. So it's like computer that I use every day for work, expensive, kit it out, fully loaded. Batteries for something I use occasionally, cheapest possible, recyclable, rechargeable, whatever version will do. When you go in the middle, this is a little bit of a tangible. When you go in the middle on products, for example, you often pay a markup on something that's branded and marketed better and is more expensive, but is still really the cheap thing in terms of quality.

Yeah. When you get to the top and the high end, with a few exceptions, you find something that's like handmade in Italy, the pasta maker, it's heavy, it doesn't break. It's they've tested it. It's worked in these Italian noodle shops for 30 years. People have had the same one. Right. And then there's like the Chinese one made out of plastic when people are like, broke after a week and you're like, all right. So you get, if you're going to make a lot of noodles, which apparently we're doing now, you get their best, you get the best pasta maker that you can get. And this, the example, the analogy here is the same thing for, for business. For example, in my business as a host, I spend, I'll spend $7,000 hiring a coach for like three hours. That's like

the head anchor at CNN. And he doesn't want to coach. He doesn't want to teach. And I'm like, I need you to learn from you because you do these things that I want to do in my job and he's like fine eight grand i'm like damn it yeah wolf blitzer you're expensive right like those kinds of things you you have to pay for and the shortcut would be i'm just going to hire someone to spam my shit all over instagram and then i'll get more listens i don't have to be in that interview what you'll do is you'll get more listens but then you won't get that deep connection i think right i think you know in business i've learned that as well you know that things take time and it's really tough especially in this day and age you know I think it's going to be challenging in the future.

And I don't look to this as being very favorable for our children. That social media has really skewed people's perspective because they think that happens, things happen instantaneously. And everybody wants this instant gratification. It's really tough because whether you're trying to compete in a sport or build a business or develop a relationship, right, things take time. And I don't think that that's a very alluring thing, but it does. It's not alluring at all.

It sucks to think. that everything takes a long time. What I also say to someone, if they're not reaching where they want to go right now, that's okay. Because at least if they're making a little bit of strides every day, that in itself is a huge win. And I think they should stop being so hard on themselves to try and be like somebody else and just recognize they're making small improvements in whatever they're doing. And that's a huge win. One concept from Amrap mentality that I like was the idea of focus, focusing on what you can control. And I think I've done a lot of focusing on things I can't control in the past 10 or 12 years. and every, in fact, whenever I'm really stressed out, I often focus on, I often look at what am I focusing on?

And when I feel anxiety and stress overwhelming me, 90% of the time it's like, I'm focused on all this stuff I can't control. So I'm just waiting for the shoe to drop. Yep. With my every sphincter, my body's clenched, right? How do you focus on what matters? When you're in that moment, what are you doing? Because I know you've done this as well. Yeah, I mean, so when you talk about what's inside versus outside of control, it started with me with athletics.

I found myself just focusing on things that were outside on control. My energy was expended without being on the field. In 2010, it was this big event, you know, like jets fly over, National Anthem. I was fired up. And I was too worried about things that were outside my control. My other competitors, what they were doing, what was the workout, things like that, instead of being focused on what was in me. So I ended up really doing portlings a few events because of that.

I wasted a lot of time and energy on things. I had zero control over, right? And so I think it's really important that a lesson that some people could do is take something on stress on the mountain in this world, whatever it may be, and just create two circles and just put in the left circle of things you have in your control, put in the right circle, things that are outside your control, and choose the folks on things that are inside your control. You know, my wife and I were talking about the other day, I was getting ready for a presentation whatever was, and I was a little bit stressed, but we just go back to like, what is in our control?

Well, it's preparing for the speech. what's outside my control is that the lights turn off or if the camera, whatever. Those things are outside my control. I can't worry about it. And I think through fitness, I developed this skill. And so I'd recommend anybody who maybe is having challenging times, like in a working environment, focusing on things outside of control. Like, for example, what your boss thinks about your paper.

Well, do the best paper you can. What they think is outside your control. But I think you develop that skill through fitness really well. Because when you're working out, if things are outside of your control, control. I mean, you could just stay focused and present on what you're doing and don't worry about anybody else. So the two circles exercise, this is, you're writing these in these circles so that you can become aware of what you can control, like, oh, hey, I'm worried about all this stuff in the circle on the right, which is the can't control it. Yeah. Forget about it. Right. So you're essentially

giving yourself permission to just go, this is something I can't control. Now I'm aware of what that is. Forget about it. Yep. Or at least try to. And it's try to forget about it. For example, in competing, it's like, what am I in control of? My nutrition. my preparation, how I tie my shoes, right? Great. Focus on that. That's stuff I never think about, but you're right. If your shoes comes up untied during the CrossFit games. That's a big problem. You got a problem, right? You triple tie that thing. Or for example, my transition. I'm going to do this. And visualizing what I'm going to do. So like, okay, what's in my control is creating a game plan. My goal now is to execute on that game plan. But this is in my control. What's out of my

control is what my competitor does. He might go out really hot. I can't worry about him. I need to stick to my game plan. What I'm doing. because when my heart rate was under control, this is what I came up with as the best plan to dominate. Then all of a sudden, when things go awry and your competitors are doing whatever, stick to your game plan because you chose that when things were nice and calm. And you can relate that in everyday life. You know, if you get into a situation, stick to your plan,

and then obviously you need to adapt and overcome when needed. So the proceeds from the book all go to nighu.org. What is that? So before the pre-release, so before January 8, all revenue that comes in goes directly, that after that a portion of it. We're so determining exactly what that portion is, but it's going to be significant. Go to Nigo Doleger.

So my wife and I, when our daughter was diagnosed, we created a partnership with the never ever give up organization. It's also known as a Jesse Reese Foundation, which was named after Eric Reese's daughter, who passed away from a brain tumor. So what we do is we partner with them, and we give memories for kids. So kind of like a Make a Wish or on a MicroLevel. So Make a Wish requires a ton of documentation, which it should. because it can be very expensive.

These are like $1,000, $2,000, $2,000, here, go to Disneyland, go to dinner, go to a baseball game. And what we're trying to do is allow families to create memories. And because these memories will last for them forever, even if they do lose their child, want to let them have these memories with them. So they're called breakaway adventures. It's a great thing we do. And we also fund people during the holidays with all kinds of things that we just go into the hospital and give them checks to help out with families.

So all proceeds benefit that. My wife also hosts an annual. event called avaskitchen.org if you want to check it out. It's every year. And all proceeds from that also benefit Bakeaway Adventures and NIGU.org. So it's important to you to help other families get through this because it sounds like it had obviously a super strong effect on you and your family, which it would be impossible not to. Have you seen other families that are really struggling with this? Because it seems like I don't know what I would do. I feel like I'd be a mess. Yeah, it breaks people. Yeah. I mean, I've seen it mentally, physically break people.

where a lot of times what you find is that, you know, you have the husband, there's resentment that builds up because the wife, in general, I'm using very generalities. The wife is there in the hospital, the kids, the kid, and the husband's out there working. And so the husband's saying, hey, I'm working so hard. She's saying, well, I'm in this. And their resentment bills because they're just, they're not in it together. They're each doing separate things. And so if we could build a little bit of financial support to let them kind of reconnect and come together and not just be so like hospital or work, but, actually connect, I mean, that's really, really rewarding for them. So that's one of the things we do.

But I mean, I mean, yeah, I've seen like, we've seen families that just lost their kid. We've seen families that just got diagnosed. We've seen families that have been going through it. I mean, it's, it's, there's a number of things you see when you're in the hospital for as long as we have. And it's just, we're forever motivated and inspired to help those families because we knew how hard it was for us. And we had everything stacked in our favor. Everything. We had the type of diagnosis, the type of this, the family being around. We had everything. We had everything. We still know how hard it is, so I can only imagine what it's like to not have all those things in place. Jason, thank you very much. This has been really, I've got to say, very interesting,

but also great getting to know you in the past couple months. You do walk the walk of what a person who cares about other people does. I think that's really interesting and inspiring, because, of course, I interview a lot of people where I realize, a lot of stuff with this is a veneer or like, this is supposed to look good, but really is driving sales over here. I mean, and, and, look, fine for people who do that, but you seem very, what you see is what you get, man. You know what I mean? I was going to say simple. That's not a good compliment.

What you see is what you get. You know what I mean? I try and be authentic to what the message I'm putting out, right? It's like, whatever I say, I hope people recognize. Like, that's who I am. And that's the goal. Yeah. Yeah.

And Ashley's dad must be really stoked that you turned out to be the man you are now and said the guy he wore in high school. Yeah, we go ask you about her. Yeah, let's do it. Thank you very much. All right. Great big thank you to Jason Kalipa. The book title is as many reps as possible.

Really fun getting to know him and his family during the show here. And if you want to know how I managed to create these relationships and opportunities and manage my relationships with dozens slash hundreds, actually, over a thousand now that I think about it, people, individually. Check out our Level One course, which is free over at Jordan Harbinger.com slash Level One. And the problem with kicking the can down the road is that we're not able to make up for lost time when it comes to relationships and networking. The number one mistake I see people make is postponing this and not digging the well before they get thirsty. Once you need relationships, you're too late to leverage them. These drills are designed to take just a few minutes per day.

This is the stuff I wish I knew a decade ago. It's not fluff, it's crucial, and you can find it at Jordan Harbinger.com slash level one. Speaking of relationships, tell me your number one takeaway here from Jason Kalipa. I'm at Jordan Harbinger on both Twitter and Instagram. This show is produced in association with Podcast One, and this episode was co-reiber. produced by Jason Amrap de Philippo and Jen Harbinger. Show notes are by Robert Fogarty. Worksheets by Caleb Bacon, and I'm your host, Jordan Harbinger.

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