The Jordan Harbinger Show - 830: Terry Crews | On Hollywood, Harassment, and Healing

Episode Date: May 2, 2023

Terry Crews (@terrycrews) is a beloved cinema and television star, furniture designer, artist, philanthropist, activist, former NFL player, and author. His most recent book is Tough: My Journey to True Power. What We Discuss with Terry Crews: How Terry prioritizes mental and physical health through exercise, nutrition, and rest. What Terry has learned about the power of forgiveness and how it can help to break cycles of anger and resentment — on an individual and societal level. How staying true to ourselves and pursuing what we love — even in the face of risking failure or criticism — allows us to make a positive impact on ourselves as well as the world. Terry's views on personal accountability as a crucial component of growth and change, and how taking responsibility for our actions allows us to become the best versions of ourselves. The importance of empathy and understanding toward people with different perspectives and backgrounds, and the need to engage in respectful dialogue while seeking common values. And much more... Full show notes and resources can be found here: jordanharbinger.com/830 This Episode Is Brought To You By Our Fine Sponsors: jordanharbinger.com/deals Sign up for Six-Minute Networking — our free networking and relationship development mini course — at jordanharbinger.com/course! Like this show? Please leave us a review here — even one sentence helps! Consider including your Twitter handle so we can thank you personally!See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Coming up next on the Jordan Harbinger Show. Being successful, I realize overachievement is almost the same as underachievement. When you are underachiever, you hide under a bridge. When you're overachiever, you hide under a bridge you own. You know what I mean? Like success is the warmest place to hide. It hides all these problems and all these things because no one's going to call you on your jump. Welcome to the show. I'm Jordan Harbinger. On the Jordan Harbinger show, we decode the stories,

secrets and skills of the world's most fascinating people. We have in-depth conversations with scientists, entrepreneurs, spies, psychologists, even the occasional investigative journalist, legendary Hollywood director, neuroscientist, or gold smuggler, and each episode turns our guest's wisdom into practical advice that you can use to build a deeper understanding of how the world works and become a better thinker. If you're new to the show or you want to tell your friends about the show, and of course I appreciate it when you do. I suggest our episode starter packs is a great place to begin. These are collections of our favorite episodes organized by topic that'll help new listeners get a taste of everything that we do here on the show. Topics like persuasion and

influence, China, North Korea, disinformation, cyber warfare, crime and cults, and more. Just visit Jordan Harbinger.com slash start. You can also search for us in your Spotify app to get started, or use our AI chatbot right there on the website at Jordan Harbinger.com and just ask it what you should listen to, and hopefully it will actually give you a recommendation. That's the idea anyway. Today on the show, action movie hero sitcom star, children's book illustrator, advertising pitchman, playable video game character, talent show host, high-end furniture designer, and human rights activist Terry Cruz, and I'm sure I'm forgetting plenty of other things. This guy started off doing odd jobs in California before making it. He was doing security for guys like Ice Cube.

Kind of funny how that works out. Actor and former NFL player, of course, and professional peck popper. I forget that. You might know him as the screaming Old Spice guy, President Camacho in idiocry from America's Got Talent, or maybe if you have terrible taste in movies from white chicks or a zillion other roles. And like I said, he's a playable video game character. Not many people can say that. That's pretty damn cool. And we walked past each other once on Hollywood Boulevard like a decade ago, so basically we go way back. Enjoy this conversation with Terry Cruz. I have to drive my own parents to the airport back to Michigan. Oh, yes.

I heard you're from Royal Oak, right? I was born in Royal Oak, yeah. I grew up in Troy. Oh, in Troy. Yeah, I grew up in Flint. Yeah, I know. And my dad was always like, don't go to Flint. It's dangerous.

And this is in the late 90s. Before that, 80s when you grew up, it goes on that same. Oh, yeah, dude. Wait, first of all, you know, I was born in 1968, but I was in the Flint heyday until I was about five to eight years old. It was awesome. And then all of a sudden, it was pandemonium, Armageddon. It was the end of the world.

It was just like Walking Dead from the 80s all the way to now. It was bad, dude. It's scary going there because Detroit is quite dangerous in places. Flint, it's almost like the whole place. You just go, what happened here? All of it. It is like the Walking Dead. It's a good way to describe it.

No, and it's wild because I tell people, you know, there are two Michigan's. You know, there's Ann Arbor. There's like Troy and all those kind of places And then there's like Blent and Benton Harbor And inside eight mile in Detroit You know downtown now has come back But downtown Detroit I went to Interlocking

Which was the first time I ever saw the other side It's like a fancy music camp for people I guess was that a good way to describe Yeah yeah Music and art and whole thing And lots of rich kids And I was just like looking around Like what is going on

but I had a scholarship. Yeah. It was the thing that got me out of Flint was my artistic ability, which was great. It's funny because people go, well, you have a lot in common with Terry Cruz. I was like, what, Michigan? And they're like, will you both play the flute?

Which, by the way, I don't know about you. I got tormented endlessly for playing the flute. But it's practicality. First of all, smallest instrument, easiest to transport. You're with all the girls. Tell me that a saxophone is better. First of all, this is the thing, man. People forget.

The flute is still one of the, coolest instruments ever. I mean, when you hear it, you look at most black exploitation movies. It's all the flute. You know what I mean? It's all like, you know, when you got the real, like the shaft remixes and even when you listen to some of Dr. Dre's stuff, a lot of hip hop and all this, you always hear flute everywhere. You know what I mean? It's kind of wild. Yeah. But nobody wants to play it, but it's everywhere. And I'm going, dude, I'm not playing around. Like, I realize what's cool. And it may not look cool, but I love being a lot of It's always been one of the coolest things to me, and I had an uncle who taught me how to do it.

And I just held on to it. Sometimes I just pick it up and start jamming when I get the mood, and it's all good. Really? I was wondering about that, because I saw the moment on AGT where you go out there and play the flute with the dude who everyone was kind of like, come on, man. I wondered, I'm like, did he have to practice a bunch for this? Or was he just like, no, I can still play the flute. Yeah, exactly. You know, and now, again, I'm not super good right now.

I used to be better. Easy to get rusty at the flute. I would really love to take a month off and just study with somebody and just like practice a little more and get a little better. You got to understand what's something about me. Like everything I'm doing now I did when I was 10. Really? I realized I just never stopped.

From workouts to drawing to I hosted my high school talent show. Everything I do, I just realize I just don't want to quit. And for me, there was always this pressure to like, hey, man, grow up, give that up. You know, because you got to understand whatever you really wanted to do was viewed as bad. Like, if you wanted to go get a job, it was always like, okay, give up your dreams now. Yeah. And, you know, get serious. You're not supposed to have fun when you work.

I said when I was really, really young that I was just going to do whatever I loved and that was going to bring me my money. Wow. Now, if that's a little bit of money, fine. If it's a whole lot of money, great. But I'll never really worry about the outcome. Just do what you love because doing something I hated is torture. I had a couple of those jobs. In college, I worked at a refrigeration company and just uploading stuff in the factory and restocking the shelves.

I was like, how can people do this for like 40, 50 years? How can you do it? Imagine you're back after a year. It's good for college. It's good for a summer. Sure. But, oh, my God. I mean, I was working with people who had been there 30, 40 years.

I was like, that's not going to be. My back hurts just thinking about unloading refrigeration units for 40 years. Well, wait, they made me put them up on roof. It's like, I had to carry him up on a ladder. This is like... OSHA wants a word. Oh, no. Yeah, there was no OSHA back there.

It was like, get that big football player brother to go do it, you know? Oh, my God. I heard you say that my whole life is bonus points. Coming from Flint, Michigan, everything I do now is great. gravy and more than anyone expect it. From Flint, expectations are very, very low. And you're right, it's not a place where kids grow up credibly wanting to be in movies. I would imagine somebody would go, well, you can be anything you want. And you're like, I want to be an actor. And they're like, now hold on. This is Michigan and it's Flint, Michigan. Not going to happen. Hold on.

What you just said actually happened. Really? You have to understand. We would have these assemblies at school. You know what I mean? And it'll be like, you can do anything you want to do. And we go, yeah. But see, I would always take it to heart. Like, I would be the kid that would go up to that same person once the assembly was over. And I would tell them. I was like, listen, I want to do this, this, this, this. And they were like, what the hell make you think you can do that? I was saying, you did.

That's so sad. You just said we could do anything we want to do. And they were like, oh, well, I didn't mean that. And you said. And listen, man, I realized, I was like, I got tired of that kind of pep talk. I'm going to start putting this to work. Like, I got to prove. First of all, if it's going to work, you have to try it in order for these things to work.

So let me just see if all this stuff you're talking is going to happen. And I just decided to try everything I wanted to do. It's got to be really disheartening to come from a rough place, have somebody give you a pep talk like that, and then you find out that they really didn't mean it. Oh, yeah. That's worse than just not having the talk in the first place. That was the conundrum. In Flint, the problem was it was a lot of adults who didn't believe that there was a better life either.

Again, it was one of the things to say, but they would always look at us like, you poor kids, you're going to come off worse than we did. But I was an optimist, man. I have to say, I still am. I'm an eternal optimist in regards to, I like positivity. I like being around people who think about dreams and really go after. You know what I mean? It's the thing that what I call it, it makes my baby jump, you know.

But I've also been around the other side. And I watch things get worse and worse and worse. When people just complain and people whine, when people get cynical, I've watched them go into the toilet. And I was like, the way you're speaking, I don't even understand how you would think success would even be option for you. It seems like America's got talent's probably a pretty good. place to be around people who are going for their dreams. Because you get people up there who are

really talented and even the delusional ones are still like, oh, well, I'm trying. These are my tribe. You got to understand. Everybody on America's Got Talent is my tribe. They've been told time and time again, you're never going to make it. Don't do it. You're wasting your time. Get a real job. And I'm like, hey, man, this is our house. You know what I mean? This is where you can make it happen. In fact, the crazier and sillier these guys are, the more I I love him. You know what I mean? We have a guy named Sethward who's been, probably he's been on AGT more times than any other person.

And he comes and he does the most ridiculous things. He dresses like a walrus and jumps off the stage. And I love him. I love him. I'm like, that's the spirit. You have to be this kind of like unforgettable person. And sometimes you just get recognized for just your weirdness. And that's okay.

And that's me too. The peck poppin thing was my deal, you know? If that was all I was known for, then, hey, I'll be the peck popping brother, you know. My trainer wanted me to tell you that he can do the same thing and that if he ever meets you, he's going to show you how it's done. His name is Chad. He's like, tell him. No, I meet it. Tell him.

Listen, I get so many people coming to me like, man, look, I'm doing it. I'm doing it. I'm like, yes, so good. So good. Security. Yeah. I know you had a rough upbringing, not just because of Flint, but because your dad, he had it tough. And you even said that you found out that he also as a kid had it tough from his dad.

Not to bring this up, but it is public record now. You said, I wet the bed till I was 15 because I didn't know what was going to happen every night. I'd wake up screaming, glass breaking, and I said, I got to find a way out. It seems like you were determined to break that cycle. Your kids have hit the dad lottery in a lot of ways, not just because you're a well-known dude, but you had a front-road seat of what not to do, I would imagine. Yeah, you know what? One thing I tell my kids, sometimes you have to experience the worst of times.

to realize when you're in the best of times. My kids sometimes come at me and they're like, oh, man, things are going to suck and this is not bad. And I'm going, you just don't know how bad it could really be. If you just would understand how bad things could get, you could look at your day today as totally different. You'd be like, wow, this is nice. I have experienced some very hellish times.

And it makes me more grateful because I look around and where I'm at right now, and I just go, oh, my God. I literally wake up, like, wow. When I used to wake up, like, oh, my God, what is happening. And it's wild because I see how people can get very, very depressed sometimes, but it's about perspective. And I realized when I was a kid that I had to get out of here because my father was so abusive just to my mom and to us.

And it was just one of those things where I knew, And one day, I might have to kill him. He ruled the house with an iron hand. It was one of those things where he loved intimidating people. I don't remember having really fun, happy times with him. It was just always a gut check about everything. I remember I was 12, and he's like, go change the oil. And I'm like, I don't know how to change the oil.

Go change the oil, boy. And you're like, okay. And I put a bunch of oil in the carburetor. I had no idea how to change. oil. But I was like, okay, I'll try to do it with no instruction. And then the car starts messing up. He's like, what the hell you do? And it was like, but you never told me how to change the oil. And this is the game. The job was to make me feel like an idiot all the time. And that somehow made him feel better. And but then it's, but it's really funny because I realize once you've

grown up with that, you see it everywhere. You know, you see it when people, are obviously trying to test you and something you have no clue in. And then when you don't know it, oh, I do. And you're like, all right, okay, yay, you get the cookies. And where I grew up, it was like that. Everybody was challenging you and testing you. And because the city was falling apart. And so everyone was trying to basically gain their self-worth by putting everyone else down.

Right, yeah. I realized I didn't have to do that. I realized, in fact, how about trying to build people up? How about supporting some people who really want to go for something? And let me tell you, it's been an amazing thing for me because I almost picked up a lot of the bad things that my dad had. Like, it's weird. You try to avoid these things, but you don't know any other way to be. I mean, I would definitely call myself a toxic male at one time because, you know, playing in the NFL, my time over there, it was,

major gut check time where everyone was testing your manhood and then you had to be more manly than the other guy. It was one of those things for me that I kind of played the part. But by playing that part, by acting the part, I really wasn't truly me. It was a horrible existence. It's interesting. You mentioned that about football this morning. I talked to my friend Cassage Marsh, who plays even now. And I said, hey, man, is it common for NFL players to have a rough upbringing? Probably kind of a dumb question. And he's like, yeah, it goes without saying because you have to play that game. One, everybody else, that's the only game they know. Two, it's sort of that macho culture. So even if you had a normal upbringing, you're around a bunch of other people who are playing

that game. And it's almost like that's the whole culture of that. I tell people all the time, it's hard to have two good parents and playing the NFL. Yeah. I mean, because you play on anger. And I had a lot of anger. Being angry at things adults told me, lies that I was told, people always playing these games in your head, playing head games with you. It makes you a very angry kid, and then you grow into a very angry man. In the NFL, anger works. It works. You play off anger. It's funny. Have you ever been so angry, you've never felt pain? I remember just being so mad and then looking down and there's a giant cut on my arm, and you're like, I didn't feel that at all. Wow. That's not good.

No, that's what I'm saying. You know, I mean, you literally turn off your pain and you turn on the anger and you're able to do these superhuman feats, but it's usually damage. It doesn't involve building or creating. It's always damaging, and it damaged a lot of things for me. Do you get into lifting and fitness early on because of almost like a self-defense, self-preservation instinct? Because I thought I'd have to kill my dad. Dang.

I mean, he was a big guy. And I knew I would have to kind of build my shell. You know what I? Yeah. The street was hard. I mean, it's also with Flint getting crazier and crazier by the minute. You got to understand, that crack epidemic was horrifying. And then there was the demise of the auto industry, which was a double whammy.

So people went straight from working into factory into being drug kingpins. and it was a lot of violence. You know, that's the thing. I'm sure that's why your parents told you, watch out for Flint, because Flint literally led the nation in murders per capita for years. Yeah.

It was just out of bounds. Like, I knew friends and had people I knew, and they're like, oh, he's dead now. You know, he got murdered last weekend. And you're like, what? It created this hyper-sensitive world for me. And lifting was my thing where, okay, if I ever get jumped or if I ever get attacked, I got to be able to do something.

Me and my brother took a karate class one time, and the teacher had his kids beat us up. What? I'm just telling you the real, man. No, I know. This is, again, you're talking about some rules that are like, they're like feudal rules. Like, this place was like Genghis Khan and the kingdom of like some crazy Game of Thrones stuff. This is before lawsuits where it was ubiquitous. Oh, yeah.

Yeah. We go down in his basement and his kids, they were a little older than us, me and my brother, and their whole job was to kick our ass. And I was like, I don't want to do this anymore. When did we learn how to defend ourselves? Wait, wait, we didn't know anything about karate. And they did. And they were like, this is how you're going to learn.

So I was like, so we're going to come down here every Saturday morning and get beat up? I was like, no, that's all right. I'll just go to the gym. Yeah. And that was my thing. It was a good choice. It was a very good choice. My God.

It was crazy. The dad was mean as hell. He was meaner to my father. And I was like, oh, Lord, this is bad. I feel bad for those kids, though. I often wonder what happening to those kids. Yeah. I have no idea.

You're listening to the Jordan Harbinger show with our guest, Terry Cruz. We'll be right back. Hey, if you're wondering how I managed to book all these amazing folks for the show, authors, thinkers, creators, every single week. It's because of my network. And I'm teaching you how to build your network for free. in a non-shmoozy, non-gross way. That's our free course.

Jordan Harbinger.com slash course is where you can find it. All of this is super easy. It's not cringy. It's not schmoozy. It's down to earth. There's no awkward strategies. There's no cheesy, gross stuff.

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Five-minute networking was taken. By the way, many of the guests on our show, subscribe and contribute to the course. Come join us. You'll be in smart company where you belong. You can find the course at Jordan Harbinger.com slash course. Now, back to Terry Cruz. Years ago, like 10 years ago, I walked past you on Hollywood Boulevard,

and you had, I'll call it resting Terry face. You were thinking about something else. I was like, whoa, and my friend goes, don't worry, it's Terry Cruz. I was like, okay, cool, because you were like looking off in the distance. Probably who knows what happened that morning. And I was like, oh, yeah, let's not say. You know what, this is the thing.

And I'm going to tell you what's so amazing. That is made my career. This resting face is very, very like, I don't know what it is. But ever since I was a kid, people were like, you're okay, man? You're right? I'm like, no, no, I'm just thinking. I'm okay. But I have a face that's very like, you know.

It was sunny. And then when I'm like, okay. And then when I smile, they go, oh, oh, hey, hi. Oh, wow, he's so nice. Oh, it's so good. And you got to understand, like, that's my whole career. The whole career is that flip. Like, from white chicks,

to any movie you've ever seen me in. It's always been like, oh, wait, the first movie I ever got, one of the movies was a movie called Friday After Next where I played this crazy ex-con who tried to rape Cat Williams. It was really bizarre, okay? It couldn't be made today, by the way. But because of that face, Ice Cube was just like,

oh, man, you're the dude. But I knew that I was a flute-playing artist. You know what I'm saying? But it's one of those things where, as long as I didn't smile, they were like, oh, man, I could have had a career as this straight, badass kind of guy, but I never wanted to do it. I remember, like, they were like, man, you know, you got to take some more karate lessons, and you can be the next action guy.

And I was like, yeah, but I like being funny. I love making people laugh, and I love bringing that joy and stuff. And I got a job being this intimidating guy in a movie called Malibu's Most Wanted. Oh, yeah, with Jamie Kennedy. With Jamie Kennedy. Yeah, yeah. But this was the thing. My job was to be like this super intimidating, but I kept making jokes and doing funny things.

And the director was like, dude, do this again, do that. Wait, wait. And he started pulling me out to the front. And what was so great is that I got to take the comedy route, which I had all to myself, which was a thing where as a big guy who looked him like me, I was all by myself. Like, they were like, dude, he's funny. And back when I started, they had a rule where they said muscles weren't funny. It was weird because Joe Piscopo got all built up and then they kicked them on Saturday Night Live.

Yeah. And everybody was like, okay, you got to stay dumpy or Jack Black or don't try to get in shape. It won't be funny. And I realized that I could make fun of this masculinity. I could make fun of this hyper toxic guy and really kind of turn it on its ear. You know, it's funny because a lot of my roles have done that from President Camacho and Idiocracy to even Old Spice commercial. I was going to say, Old Spice, Expendables. Yeah, expendables.

Expendables is like perfect mix of that, right? Because you're an action era, but it's also like, remember this shit on Christmas. You know, it was so funny because this is one thing I love about Stallone. Stallone is so wonderful. He wants to be a comedian. Like, he has jokes for days. But he's like, but they won't believe me. Like, yeah, you know, I'm doing the jokes, but they want to see me killing people.

So I'm going to give you the jokes. And that's what he did. He was literally telling me. let me, Terry, I want you to say this. I want you to say that. And it was so cool because he's really a funny, funny guy. He's tried a couple comedies before. That's hard to believe, though.

Low-key, I feel like there's a guy who rarely ever smiles in public and everything. Sly is hilarious, man. Listen, he's one of the funniest people I've ever been. He's just funniest Sandler, and I'm trying to tell you. But as soon as he turns it on on, he's like, back to, you know, sly. Way more intimidating than Sondler. Sandler. Regardless.

I would imagine Sly's funny mode is still scarier than Sandler's scary. Yeah. Well, Santa has no scary mode. That's all. That's true.

He just has zero scary mode, but I love him. I love it. Oh, man. I'm glad we got into this because I wondered if lifting weights gave you maybe a sense of control

that you didn't have at home. Because when you're in the gym, you're focused on yourself. It's too hard to pay attention to the outside world because you're pushing weight above your head and trying not to let it fall on you. And also, you can build your body.

For me, I'm not a big, dude, but when I was younger, lifting weights, I was like, wait a minute, I can make myself stronger than other people just by showing up every day. This is the secret weapon that no other kid had. Well, you know, I started it as a competition. It was about being stronger than everybody because, you know, when you're in the weight room, it was sport specific. But then I changed. A lot of my fitness journey right now, again, I work out for almost two hours a day, usually, every day. But a lot of my fitness journey was just about my, just health and my wellness. It's not about

competing with anybody. It's literally about longevity and trying to be the best person you can be. And also it staves off depression. It staves off a lot of bad feelings. It's very therapeutic. I work through a lot of disappointments. I work through a lot of pain. I work through a lot of my life problems in the gym. Whereas before, it used to be about being bigger than someone else or, like I said, trying to kill my dad or whatever. But especially when I quit football, there was a time in my life where I stopped working out. And it was literally like a year because I was like, why do it anymore? And I was in a complete depression.

And I first moved out to L.A. And my wife came up behind me and pinched my back fat. You know, as a man, we think we're always the same. Yeah, life comes at you fast. Yeah, and I was like, whoa, what are you doing? She said, oh, it's cute, you're cute, I love you, honey. I was like, oh, my, don't you ever touch that again? Like, I didn't even know it was there.

And then I realized, wait a minute, why am I not taking care of myself? And this is where the workout works because it's all about self-care. It's literally you taking care of yourself. And this is the essence, I think, of what being a man is. I mean, it's about taking responsibility. But you have to take responsibility for you. You can't take responsibility for anybody else. It's not about you controlling anybody else, whatever.

It's like in the wait room and in your learning and in your path, you have to take control of what you can take control of. And it starts in a gym. And what I do is I put podcasts on. I read books. I read, you know, like Tim Ferriss. Oh, sure. You know, all that stuff.

But also, I put tons of self-help books, therapeutic books that just really help me while I'm lifting. So it's never really about my body. It's about my brain at the same time. Do what you like and love, but don't worry about the outcome. So if you end up with a great body, great. But a lot of this stuff is just self-discipline. If you don't have it, you never really achieve anything. anything worth having.

Did you ever change the relationship with your dad? I know there was a confrontation at some point. How did that play out? Well, yeah. I mean, first of all, my father, I was an adult. I was about 30 years old, and he hit my mother in the mouth and literally knocked her tooth loose. I couldn't believe it because as people who suffer from alcoholism,

Christmas is a hard time. And it was around Christmas, we call it the Christmas from hell. And I told my mom to get out the house and the whole thing, and it was just me and my father, and I beat him up. I thought it was going to be therapeutic. I thought it was going to feel good. And I felt worse. It was horrible because there I was. He was the shell of a man.

I'm big, strong, towering over him, had beat him down. He's begging me to stop. And I thought that revenge would be wonderful. Because, you know, as men, we live in a revenge movie. Sure. You know what I'm saying? It's all about the get back. It's all about this.

But then I realized that you can either have revenge or success, but you can't have both. A lot of people feel like, yeah, I'm going to get people back. But what it does is drags you back into the mud. You know what I mean? You have to go back into a very dark place to find your revenge. And sometimes you don't make it back out. because even if you get it, now you're tainted. Now you're muddy and dirty and sloppy where you were clean.

And success is about leaving this stuff behind, forgetting revenge, and just finding a new territory, finding new place. You'll never get sullied. You're always being a new spot. And after I beat my father up, I didn't speak to him for like 10 years. And he was unapologetic, okay? But there was one time I remember, I started to get into therapy really big. And I really got into a very big forgiveness thing where I was like, I got to find ways to forgive people because this is hurting me. It's not damaging anybody else, me holding on to these problems, right?

And so I remember saying I got advice from a therapist and I went to my father and I had to thank him for one thing he did for me. and I said, hey, man, I want to thank you for having me. And that was the best thing I could think of. I said, because if it wasn't for you, I wouldn't exist. So thank you. And he cried. And he was like, I'm sorry for everything. I'm sorry for everything.

I was like, this is what it was. Like, I couldn't believe it, man. I really couldn't believe it. I mean, what beating him up, you know, couldn't do this did. I'm not going to say our relationship is great, But I'm different because I did forgive and move on and find that success and kind of get past the lust for revenge. I'm over it. And now I live a free life.

It doesn't really matter what he does anymore. It's about me taking control of the things I can take control of, which is myself. You know what's crazy is that I started to realize that everything I went through made me who I am today. let's say I had a great upbringing, I could be a bum on the street. You know what's crazy? I've seen great parents have crazy, ridiculous, mean, serial killer kids. Yeah, it happens. And I've also seen terrible parents, these kids come up and they just are the most amazing people.

It's just like they change the world. You know what I mean? It's really about choice. It's really about choice. Like, I can't blame my father for anything that happens to me. today. You know what I mean? Like, man, my dad was mean. Now I can't go to work. You know, dad, it makes no sense. It makes no sense. My kids can't blame me, the adult ones, can't blame me for anything that happens to them today. Because they're responsible for their day. As long as they

know that. You know, you know what I mean? But we waste a lot of time blaming old things that, you know, all of a sudden, well, if my father had did it or my mother had done that, well, they didn't. So now what are you going to do about? It's up to us to make these choices, to do these things, and do the work to make your own life better. I mean, because no one is coming to save you. That's the hard part. That's an interesting point. I do wonder a lot of people who are really successful, sports, acting, other things that you're good at, a lot of times the success brings out old negative stuff that is hiding.

And I wonder if you had any experience with that. Like, sometimes being successful highlights your flaws, whether it's money, fame, whatever. Oh, easy. Being successful, I realize overachievement is almost the same as underachievement. When you are underachiever, you hide under a bridge. When you're overachiever, you hide under a bridge you own. You know what I mean? Like success is the warmest place to hide.

It's high. It's all these problems and all these things because no one's going to call you on your jump. Oh, yeah, he's great. He looks good. It's wonderful. And I remember because I had an addiction to pornography for years. And I'd been married to my wife for 20 years and she didn't know. And it imploded our marriage, imploded.

But I was very successful. Like, you have to say, I was making money. Everybody thought it was great. And when my wife and I were going through this, because we split up, I had to go to therapy for the first time. And I literally went to this whole place where they deal with sex. addiction because I couldn't get rid of it. A lot of people doubt, they say, well, you can't be addicted to pornography, but all I knew is I couldn't stop.

I wanted to, but I couldn't. And I was like, what is going on with me? But people were still like, you know, Terry, you're great, you're fine. And I'd watch my wife, you know, roll her eyes like, oh, I know a whole different dude. And that was the thing that hit me, man. I was like, wow, man, there's a level of success that is really. internal when I can look and be proud of who I am. But this was the thing. I wasn't. It was an image. It was something that I had built up where it was this image of Terry Cruz that was so beautiful and so

wonderful. But deep down, I knew that I was a jerk. I knew that I wasn't doing the right things. It's a tough realization to come to. It's hard. Oh, no. It's the hardest. But it's necessary. I've rebuilt my whole life, man, from the ground up. It had to all get raised and we built it together, me and my wife. Do you feel like that porn addiction affected your job as an actor? Because if your job, when you're acting, is to portray humanity in general, you strip that away from people you watch in porn, obviously, right? I mean, that's almost the point, I would imagine.

It seems like it might affect your ability to do that successfully on screen yourself. Or am I just reading it? No, no, no. It's wild because when you see people as objects, this is what happens even in the industry. When I looked at comedy, even in the 90s, people weren't represented. They were like objects. You would have Asians or blacks or Hispanics that were really just stereotypes of themselves and everybody would laugh and it was like, ha, ha, ha, but you realize it's not a real person.

It does the same thing pornography does. Yeah, it's body parts, but I don't really care about how you feel about any of this. And I realized comedy was doing that in a lot of ways. didn't really care. In fact, it was all about hurting feelings. That's where the funny part was. But right now, I think that there's been a realization. One of my things that I knew that I needed to do when I was going to do something funny, I was going to be the joke. And that came out of a lot of my therapy. I realize if the joke is on me, then you have to see me as a person. It's funny because you had to see me as a whole person. This is the thing I like to say sometimes.

might be a little confusing, but I'd rather be whole than good. I'd rather be happy than right. Whole is that you see me, you see the good and bad. Whereas before, I was only obsessed with people just seeing me as a good guy and seeing me this and this and it, but I can honestly say if I'm having a bad day right now to anyone, you know, and I can honestly say my feelings. Whereas before, it was like, I'm good. No, I'm fine. Everything's great. And it wasn't great. And I would push past all those feelings, push past everything. Like if someone insulted me, I'm like, no, no, you can't touch me. I'm good, I'm good, but I'm not good.

If I was insulted by someone now, I can say, hey, man, that's not cool. I can literally look at them. That's a whole person as opposed to just being, oh, I'm good. Oh, man, he doesn't bother anybody. This is the thing about the Internet that I think is refreshing, is that, you know, for every great comment, you get 10 bad ones. And it keeps everything in perspective. Yeah.

You know what I mean? Like, I can't say everybody loves me. I can't say that. You could scroll down and you could find some people who hate my guts. Oh, in the comments. That's what I'm saying. But it's almost like, good, because that means I'm human. Now, I'm a human being.

If everybody liked me, I'm a picture. I'm an image. You know what I mean? But humanity, there's going to be people who like you. There's going to be the people who just don't care. And there's going to be people who hate your guts. That's whole. And that's okay.

So the tip here is what? Read the YouTube comments. I don't know if I like that. No, I would not advise it. I would definitely, you've got to go to therapy for a long time before you hit the comments on YouTube. Man, you've got to be and meditate for a few years. Oh, no, no. Listen, I don't even read them anymore.

But I'm just trying to say that it's perspective. You know what I mean? That's what it is. This is the Jordan Harbinger show with our guest, Terry Cruz. We'll be right back. If you like this episode of the show, I invite you to do what other smart and consider it listeners do, which is take a moment and support our amazing sponsors, or at least one of them, right? To learn more, all the deals, all the ways to support the show are going to be at Jordan Harbinger.com

slash deals. You can also search for any sponsor using the AI chatbot right there on the website at Jordan Harbinger.com. Please consider supporting those who support the show. Now, for the rest of my conversation with Terry Cruz. Your Hollywood story, the early days, has some magic to it, right? I heard you had some friends who would tip you off to movie shoots and you would go in and check it out as a or try to do security. Tell me about Training Day. I mean, you got with Denzel, and you know you're big

when you only need the first name. Everybody knows who you're talking about. Listen, oh, man, that was it. I was tipped off because what I did, I did security. So the location managers would always call me, and they were like, hey, man,

Densel shooting a new movie over here down in L.A., you got to come down, and I would come down just to watch. Now, you understand, I was not coming to L.A. to be an actor. I came to be a creative. My portfolio was in at Disney, at DreamWorks, as an animator. Wow.

And I had scripts that I had written. My whole thing was about being producing and writing. Acting was the last thing. I was doing security and they were like, hey, man, you should act. I was like, yeah, whatever. I was not interested in that. But I had so many people telling me I should try it. I went and tried it.

And this was one of those experiences where I was down there just to watch Denzel work. And the director, Antoine Fuqua, was like, hey, man. you want to be in this movie? And I was like, yeah. Wow. Hey, look, take your shirt off, go to the roof, and I'll put you in the movie. And I was the guy who was flipping pigeons on the roof and training day. When you go to that iconic scene with me clapping my hands and the pigeons are flying in the air

and Denzel's driving into the cul-de-sac. That was me. Wow. And then he said, come back every night and I'm going to put you in different spots. So during that big monologue with Denzel, he had me standing. right in front of Denzel Washington during that whole King Kong, ain't got nothing on me, you know, all that. He said, just mad dog.

And that's all I did. I remember when the Oscars went down and they showed that scene at the Oscars, my mother was like, you're in the Oscars. I was like, no, I'm not at the Oscars. I'm in the scene, you know. But I was just like, dude, I would have been happy if that was it. I really would have been happy if that's all the acting I ever got a chance to do. Because I love entertain.

Like, love it. I mean, if you're going to have one go at it, being in a movie with Denzel Washington is a good go. Oh, you know what's so funny is years and years and years later. I ran into Dazel at an event. And he was like, man, I'm so proud of you, man. I see you everywhere. And he said, I remember you standing in front of me that whole day and the whole time in that movie. And he was like, dude, you're doing good, man.

And this is no selfies. Right. I don't need that. This is some of those things that you just take. with you because he's like the OG, he's the man. You know what I mean? You're not going to get better than Denzel watching. Maybe if Obama comes up and it's like, loved you're in that movie, really big fan.

But even he's not an actor. Exactly. Exactly. I mean, he respects what I've become. I looked at my wife and she was there. Like, you saw this, right? Yeah. She was like, I saw it and I heard it.

I just went home. Like, that's it. I don't need anything else. I don't need anybody to validate me. You know what I mean? This is great. Not anymore. Yeah, I've got validation from Denzel.

I don't need to read the comments. I'm done, read the comments. That's it. No more YouTube comments. I know you take work super, super seriously because it's business. Is that how you get the rep that gets you repeat business, repeat offers? Because you say things like, I never leave anything on the table. Even if it's small, silly, like there was a lip sync battle and you're like, I am going all in.

That's your thing. That's my MO. I go all in. I go too all in. I don't have a middle speed. I'm either asleep or I'm 100 miles an hour. But I also find that is where I find my energy. Even this podcast, I realize you just got to give it up.

You spend most of the time resisting the work. And you get yourself exhausted. Just start working. You know what I mean? If you know your kitchen's got to get clean, just start. And all of a sudden, you're like, I got the energy for it. I found that was a good trick because this is one thing I learned in football. You know, when we would do training camp, it was usually two of a lot.

days. So you'd have the first practice. And the first practice was always good. And then you go take a nap, and then you go get your lunch and the whole thing, and you can't move. Literally, you're in the bed. Your body can't move. You are sore. You're like, oh, my God, you're going to be running full speed in 20 minutes. And you're like, but I can't move. And it's an obstacle. I mean, it's something like, you go, I don't know, I'm literally a quadriplegic right now. And then all of a sudden, you turn it on and you You say, get up and go. Bow! And you're out there running full speed 20 minutes later.

And you realize it's a trick. You realize it's a mental game. And that's where I learned it. And I realized, okay, I can do that with anything. So when I'm doing AGT, when I'm doing Brooklyn Nine-Nine, when I'm in a scene, it's long, and it's tired, and it's late, and whatever, go, go. 100%. Right now, it's a true.

trick. And all of a sudden, you're like, you're going, you're doing, it's happening. No coffee needed? You know what I mean? Oh, sometimes. Yeah. Okay. All right. Just trying to keep it. That's a pre-workout, though. You know what I mean? But it's really a mind game. You can talk yourself out of a lot of things, but you can also talk yourself into it. So I decide, let's talk myself into, I just do the things I want to do. If I know I want to do it, then I can go 100%. I would never tell anyone to just do things you hate. It makes no sense. It's also a lot harder. It's a lot harder, dude. When I was doing that refrigeration job, I was like, yeah, I'm getting my check at the end of the day. So go into it. But it is hard. I know a lot of people, they say like, oh, his attitude is so great. I mean,

they see the scene in white chicks. They're remembering you singing. They see you on AGT. They remember the flute scene or whatever it is. But there's an incident here with the expendables that I read about here that maybe you didn't have the greatest attitude and a change kind of midway through. You I take us through that? This is the thing, man. I suffered from what you would call this a lack of perspective. I was on the movie and what was while I was there for a few weeks and I saw that I wasn't working.

I wasn't doing a lot of things. And I developed a bad attitude. And when I say bad, I was ready to get out of there. Somehow I had pumped myself up to think that somebody owed me something. And listen, it's a trick. It can happen to anybody at any time. You can develop a bad attitude. It only takes a second.

A little whining, a little complaining, and you lose your energy to search for answers. It's truly. And I lost it. And I started whining. I was way from my family. I was in, I remember New Orleans. And I was like, man, they're not using me. And then I turned it around into a man, yeah, they're doing this to the black guy.

Oh, yeah. And I believe me, I already had that story. I was like, oh, see, they're just using me. and it's, okay, I'm just going to say my lines and get out of here, and I was horrible. And all of a sudden, dude, there was a voice that was like, dude, you're on this movie with some of the biggest action stars of all time. And you've never done an action movie. What the hell are you talking about?

And it hit me, man, this cynicism, this mean, crass, just being an idiot. It happens. And I remember just like apologizing to myself. Like, dude, I'm sorry. I got to go back in here tomorrow. And I got to act like, I want this job. I have to act like this is of my destiny. And I decided I had to go back into my mindset where it was like, hey, man, give

a hundred and stop playing around. Because again, you waste your time being cynical and complaining. It's like all that energy just is like it sucks it out of you. It's a drain. I went in the next day and I said, if I had to be, two lines, I'm going to say them with all my heart. If I have one scene, I'm going to give it everything I got. And Sly noticed. When I say, over the next few days, he's like, dude, he said, man, you are really rocking this now. He said, I'm going to make you, you're going to save my

life in this movie. And he rewrote the ending. Wow. He rewrote the movie, dude. And I realized that, damn it, that was me. It was me. And a lot of people are going to disagree with me. There's a lot of people going to go, yeah, but there are obstacles and there are people who hate your guts and there are people who, yes, very, very true, very true. There is racism. There is a lot of problems, but it's still up to you as to what you're going to do about. It's true. You cannot take away your ability to choose. You can't. And when you take away your ability to choose, you give everybody else power over your buttons. They can maneuver you, change you, do whatever you want.

But when I decided, I'm going to change this. And it's going to be a good experience because I say it's going to be a good experience. And it was. And it was. I love that. I think there's a quote for me to say something like, be the solution on set. Don't be the problem. It sounds like that dovetails with that.

I would imagine there's more to it. Oh, yeah. And you know what's funny? Even about that whole thing, the way it ended. You know, I had the producer Avi Lerner threatened me when I sued William Morris endeavor for the agent when he accosted me, sexually assaulted me, and we're going to kick you out of expendable before. And I was like, fine. Okay. And that's when I knew it was okay to let go, because I didn't want to do it anyway. I was like, this kind of behavior was going on too long,

and I also have to be able to give myself up to people who actually respect me, which is another thing, too. That's interesting. The sexual harassment stuff, you've talked about it before, on breakfast club and stuff like that. But just very briefly, what happened? Well, the head of the motion picture department, William Morris Endeavor, this man, he's everybody's agent. He was Eddie Murphy's agent, Sandler's agent, the whole thing. And this dude comes up to me, I'm at a party with Adam Sandler.

He grabbed me in my privates, right? Like, I'm just, and I jump back like, hey, man, what are you doing? Yeah. And I don't know what he's on. I don't know what he's doing. And then he comes back at me. And listen, the whole thing was, and I'm so glad I had spent years in therapy. Remember, I had already been learning about this revenge versus success thing.

I see. Yeah. And I realize if I knocked this guy out, which I don't think anyone could have doubted my ability to do that. And nobody would have blamed you for that. What did you mean? He'd grabbed my junk. But this was the thing. But no, but this is the problem.

I don't think anybody would have believed me if I had told everybody he grabbed my junk. If I had already beat him up, oh, no. I was the only black man in the whole event. And I weighed 240 pounds and I'm extremely muscular and people thought, oh, that's, Terry Cruz been waiting us now. He's a bully. You're right. I realized that this would have been something that could have set me up for a bad, bad ending.

And so I went right to him the next day and I said, hey, man, your guy was out of bounds. And they told me everything was going to be handled and it wasn't. then I went right to the head of William Morris Endeavor, Ari Emanuel. And I was like, dude, what are you going to do about this whole situation? He was like, can't do nothing. He's like, that's it. And I was like, what are you talking about? We're going to suspend him.

And he's going to lose his title. I was like, no, man, you can't work. Are you serious? You really going to put this guy back? Just a slap on a wrist? And so I sued him. And it was a big, big deal. Yeah.

But the inspiration for my move was because of the women. When the women came forward at that time, at Me Too, they were called horrors, they were called opportunists. They were like being dogged out. And this was back on the internet. And I knew that wasn't the case because I knew it happened to me. And I also would have felt like a fraud had I just remained silent and let those women get lambasted the way they were getting lambasted. And so I remember putting out these tweets that just told the story in support of what these women were going through. And I hadn't even mentioned names or everything.

And the internet went crazy. But this is the thing. During this time, you know, my wife was right there with me. And she saw the whole thing. She saw the whole thing. Oh, no. She saw the whole thing. And she said, Terry, there's not a woman on earth that hasn't gone through something like this by the time they're 14 years old.

That's horrifying. As a father of a one-year-old daughter, I'm like, I just can't. Dude, she was like, I'm going to tell you how you got to handle this. And I listened to my wife. And we went through this thing together in the effort to really what I would call democratize this thing. We turned something that was viewed as 2D into a 3D conversation. You know what I mean?

Yeah. Because anybody is under this dynamic. It happens to men and women, where everybody had thought it was just women going through this thing. but it really put a real accurate perspective on a big, big problem. And you're able to highlight, hey, like, look at these abusers, try to protect each other in the industry, look at the cover-up. I mean, that was the thing. I mean, that's why the producer called and said,

if he doesn't drop this case, we're going to kick him off Expendables 4. I was like, you can have it. First of all, the legality of what you just did. Yeah, I'm like, is that, can you do that? Well, that's how arrogant the whole business is. And people tend to say this is just Hollywood, but just imagine it happens everywhere in any corporation. Hollywood just happens to have TMZ following it. Yeah, right.

You know, your tire shop, TMZ doesn't care about, you know what I mean, or wherever else you're working, you know? And imagine saying that about any other industry. Hey, sorry, that's just Best Buy. Get your jump grab when you walk in. Hey, man. I mean, it happens everywhere, anywhere. My daughters have told me stories, but they knew they had to wait. years. Yeah, because they're like, I don't want my dad to go murder this dude. They knew. I was

like snapping. But now, and I'm on the other side of this, it changed my perspective. I don't know if it's changed the world's perspective because things are still going on, but it's definitely, definitely open my eyes to everything that goes on. And it's an eye opener, man. And I really, I don't regret it. I think it's part of my purpose of being in Hollywood, just along with being on AGT and just along with being Brooklyn Nine-N-N-N-N. It's like, hey, we got to make this a safer town. We can't have people afraid to say things. You can't be afraid. You know, like, listen, if you're afraid, don't do it. But if you're going to do it, don't be afraid. I decided I was going to do it. And I was going all I am. Man, I love that. I wonder, has getting famous changed you in your life

is this dumb question? But what I mean is you still have to be Terry the Dad and Husband at home. You can't let that creep in because I feel like that kind of thing can screw up your homeland, especially you start reading the positive comments. And you're like, you want me to take out the trash, damn? Have you seen what they're saying about me? Oh, I went through that so bad. I went through that so bad. I was literally that guy. I was like, I'm not taking out the trash. She was like, boy, you better get your butt banging in it. But now, when I say success is the warmest place to hide, it's one of those things where your family, you can't hide from them. They know who you are. They know. Every time someone was like, he's so wonderful and my wife will roll her

eyes. That hurts though. Or my kids would look at me like, yeah, but you lost your temper over and I'm like, this guy's going to blog about that. Yeah, you know, and I just realized, wow, man, I can really honestly say that I'm whole. I mean, these last probably 10 years, I've been the holest I've ever been in my entire life. Like, because it's really about my family first. It's really about that and making these stands publicly and also sharing my stories. A lot of these things are not things you had to find out or through some scandal or I was like, Terry Cruz was digging in the pornography. We caught him in a porno place, you know.

It wasn't like that. It was like me just talking on Instagram Live or Facebook Live at the time and just really sharing my own struggle to humanize me. First of all, this Hollywood stuff, it's so deceiving. You know what I mean? And I really, it's very, very important that people see me at the grocery store. Or people see me walking around. They're like, oh, you're driving a car?

I'm like, yes, I am. That's the bar. You know, people think if somebody is floating you around on a royal throne with four people, and it's like, no, dude, sorry, I'm buying hamburger helper today. You know what I mean? Wife's out of town, right? That's it. Hey, look, I'm cooking, okay?

But it's very important. And that keeps me in perspective. That keeps me straight. Because when you see me as a human, you might decide you like me or you might decide you don't, that's okay. That's totally your prerogative. But it helps me in that I am a real human and it's very refreshing. I agree. It is very refreshing.

And you're very grounded. I know in 2017 you won Sexiest Man Alive from People magazine. And it's like, that feels good. but that recycling bin is not going to take itself out. Yeah, exactly. Still a coin flip on whether you're getting late tonight, by the way. In fact, this is funny because that magazine is in the recycling bin. My wife's like, clunk.

It's over. You know, that's 2017. You know, it's 2023 now. Where are you, buddy? Yeah. What have you done from me late again? Man, I want to be respectful of your time. Thank you so much for coming in.

We all got to smell that old spice. I appreciate it. I'm always wearing it too. It's so good. I love those guys. And it's great, man. Thank you so much. These are awesome questions.

Thank you. No, thank you. I appreciate it, brother. We've got a preview trailer of our interview with hip-hop legend, T.I. Harris, on how we went from committing crimes to committing rhymes. Check out episode 262 with Tip T.I. Harris right here on the Jordan Harbinger show. Let's expedite this ice. Now, where I'm from, we do what we call pouring our own troubles.

All right. Cheers. Yes. All right? You dropped out of high school. When you were that age, were you thinking, oh, I'm just going to sell drugs for a while, then I'm going to become a famous musician. Well, to be perfectly candid with you, that's exactly what I was thinking. I was going to sell drugs until I earned myself the opportunity to become a musician or an artist. I found out my girlfriend at the time was pregnant with my oldest son, quit my job at the airport, completely started head first into the street. That probably lasted about three or four months.

but my probation officer still thought I worked at the airport. We had been working on a demo to shop around. It was phenomenal stuff. I said, if you could take me somewhere right now where I could have an opportunity to present myself to somebody, then I'll stop. Jason said, I know somewhere, and I say, see, that's why we're on the team together. So we pull up, Jason walked me in the room, and then immediately I meet Reese and Mello. Three months after that, I was signed. A month before my son was born, I was straight.

Your parole officer must have been like, oh, great, he's got a record deal. All right, he's going to be back at the airport in like a month and a half. You are on thin ice, man. I mean, to be honest, which he didn't find out I wouldn't at the airport until I told him. He still thinks he worked at the airport. For more with TI, including some tips on how he runs his business here, check out episode 262 with Tip Ti Harris right here on the Jordan Harbinger show. Man, we just ran the clock out on this one.

I love it. By the way, anyone out there doing video games, I love to do voiceovers. I'm no Terry Cruz, but you just let me know when I can be a character in your game. I'm all in. I've done Grand Theft Auto and a bunch of stuff like that. Gangster games. I really enjoy that work, so holler at me and I'll give your game some free love on the show. Can't really beat that.

Free advertising. Not that big companies that make games give a crap about it, but whatever. I love this interview with Terry Cruz. I really had a great time. He has a lot of stuff that we talked about before and after the show. He told me a story one Friday night when he was in second grade. He said his dad stomped into the living room. put on some sad music and basically slumped in his chair.

And he looked so pitiful sitting there all alone that Terry felt really bad and tiptoed over, put his arms around him, leaned in and gave him a kiss on the cheek. And his dad, it's so sad that this is one of his memories, right, early memories. He turned and stared at him in shock and was just kind of almost disgusted by it. And Terry says he backed up so fast that he almost tripped. And that is heartbreaking. it sort of set the tone for his life later on. He spoke about lifting weights. We were talking about the gym. He said, I could make myself look fearsome. Muscles were like a superpower. And he said,

one day I knew my dad, which of course, remember his dad was super abusive. He said, I knew my dad was going to go too far one day, and I would be strong enough to need to take him out. And no boy should grow up thinking that. But at the time, that's what he was going through. That was his reality. And the fear that comes through a story like that is just palpable. I think most people hearing something like this, thankfully, cannot relate at all. But it's not all sort of doom and gloom. Terry's kind of a prankster, if you can call it that. He told me another story that when he was a student, he was an art student in college, and he needed to make paintings that were progressively better. And I think he was having a big summer, a busy summer, it was doing something else. So what he did

is he created four or five paintings each one that was progressively better than the last. He did them all at the same time. So then when he would go to class, he would turn in the paintings, in order of improvement. And that way it looked like he was improving, but he just spent all of his time at football practice, which I think is hilarious. So he basically scams his way through art class by using paintings he already made

because he knew what the assignment was going to be. And I don't know why that's funny, but it just sort of shows that he's got tenacity. He's willing to do the work, but he's not necessarily willing to do the work in the way that you're supposed to do the work. And he loved painting and drawing, but he just knew he was never going to make it out of Flint with that.

And he was probably right. I mean, the fact of the matter is he did pretty well himself and not necessarily because of his painting skills. He also spoke of a fork in the road, if you will, during the movie The Expendables. He started off. He said he had a bad attitude because he wasn't getting paid enough. He wasn't getting used enough. He felt almost entitled.

And he just thought to himself, you know, this is not a winning attitude. This is not going to go well. And here I am in a movie with Slice Stallone and Jason Stadham and Arnold Schwarzenegger. I'm just lucky to be at the table. So he shifted his attitude and came up with lines like, remember his shit at Christmas? and his idea to be the solution on set, not the problem, changed the way that he looked at his work. And so he's filming the expendables in Bulgaria,

and he paints a really interesting picture of this, by the way, because Bulgaria can be a little sketchy, especially when they were filming it. So he's in the Balkans, there's all these mafia guys that pretty much run everything, and they're all staying in these nice hotels, and the mafia guys, of course, are all there too. And he's like, they're sketchy gangsters in the hotel lobby,

and I'm just wanting to go home, but I knew that this was one of my big chances to really do something with this movie. And you heard it, I mean, Sly really turned around when he turned around. And it's one of the things that made his career what it is today. He is really good at the action hero thing, but he's also an actor who just refuses to be typecast. First, it's a big scary dude. Then he's singing some goofy song in white chicks. Then he's playing the flute with his shirt off on America's Got Talent.

Then he's blowing stuff up with the expendables again. And he's got a hell of a lot of range. and I asked him to what he attributes that range. And he said, and I'm paraphrasing here, I constantly get out of my comfort zone. Looking cool is the easiest path to mediocrity. The coolest guy in my high school works at a car wash. And that I did not paraphrase.

I thought that was really, really insightful. He went on to say, I never do anything for money. I do it because something amazing is happening. So he has all these unique experiences and unique paths and weird parts and gigs because he wants the experience. and I think that's a great way to look at things. Look, I'm no Terry Cruz, but I do a lot of stuff for the experience, and I follow a lot of things that I'm interested in solely because I'm interested in them.

And that's one, it never feels like work when you're doing that. And two, it can lead to some really incredible things. I mean, this whole podcast was me following my interests to do something like a radio show that nobody would care about. And 16, 17, whatever years later, here I am still following my interests, right? Still just doing what I enjoy. It's that whole, if you do it you love, you'll never work a day in your life. I won't say I never work a day in my life here, but I sure as hell enjoy it when I do.

Thanks again to Terry Cruz. All things Terry Cruz will be in the show notes at Jordan Harbinger.com. Our chat GPT bot that can make you a custom playlist, find any promo code, any info from anything we've ever done on this show, including feedback Friday questions, Jordan Harbinger.com slash AI. Transcripts in the show notes, videos on YouTube, advertisers, deals, discount codes, and hey, ways to support the show all at Jordan Harbinger.com slash deals. I've said it once. I'll say it again. Please consider supporting those who support the show. I'm at Jordan Harbinger on Twitter and Instagram. You can also connect with me on LinkedIn. And I'm teaching you how to connect with great people and manage relationships using systems, software, tiny habits, the same stuff I use every single day. It's our six-minute networking

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