The Josh Innes Show - Baller Ass Suites At The Texans Game

Episode Date: December 16, 2025

The Texans are adding some new field level clubs that will include rides to and from the game. I don't really care about fancy stuff. But, I do enjoy free booze and a ride. What level of rich do you aspire to be? AJ Brown drove a Honda Accord to the game. Perhaps he's smarter than we think. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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The Houston Texans will launch sales for two high-end field-level hospitality clubs inside NRG Stadium, including an offering that features a chauffeur from members' homes to the game. What? Dude, that's badass. Sign me up for that, man. Like the idea of a chauffeur driving you to the game, like that's the worst part about going to a sporting event is having to drive to the sporting event

or finding a ride to the sporting event. Oh boy, let me play a couple of commercials. Let's dive into this. This is sexy. At Fandual Casino, you get even more ways to play. Dive into new and exciting games. And all of your favorite casino classics, like slots, table games, and arcade games. Get more on Fandual Cucson.

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modern corporate entertainment spaces in the 23-year-old stadium. Yeah, it's not the greatest stadium. It's funny how when they built that stadium, like four or five years later, every stadium, like the modernization of stadiums happened even more. Like, there was a brand new stadium. Like, when I moved there in 2009, like, it already felt sort of antiquated because they started building stadiums that were far more modern. Like, NRG has always felt kind of like, like new because it had to be new because they built it in the last 25 years. But it never felt like fancy. Now, on one hand, I'm okay with that because I don't give a shit about fancy stadiums because I'm not going to a football game to go to a club, right? Like, it's cool. Like, this sounds pretty badass. Like, I would do it

just for the ride to the game, you know? But, like, and by the way, I don't like field level suites either. I think, oh, you can't see anything. The idea of being at field level kind of sucks. You're just seeing a bunch of cameraman's asses if it's in the end zone and whatever. But, dude, I'd go do this. Created by overhauling a 6,000 square foot space, the clubs include field access, F&B, so that's food and beverage, valet parking, and access to Texans Legends with initiation fees starting at $20,000 and an annual membership ranging up to $100,000 or more. So those are seats that unless your boss has them, you will never actually sit in them. But sign me up for that. That actually sounds pretty badass.

The idea of being so important and so rich that you have a chauffeur that comes to pick you up at the game to bring you to your. your sweet. Fuck. That's living. Like, I'm not one of these people that, like, is desirous of a lot of fancy things. Like, I saw a video the other day that A.J. Brown just drives, like, a Honda Accord to work, you know? And people are like, oh, my God, AJ Brown just drives a Honda Accord.

Like, that's how the rich stay rich. And I don't know what kind of other cars he's got. But, like, that's how you stay rich. You want to not go fucking broke, like O'Dell Beckham Jr.? Here's an idea. Don't go out and buy 10 cars. and buy your mom a mansion and buy millions of dollars worth of jewelry, drive a Honda accord, right? Just drive a basic car. I would love to just have a fucking truck again, man.

Like, I'm broke, as you guys know. Like, I ain't making a ton of cash doing this job anymore. It ain't like the glory days when I was bringing in the dore me, brother. And I haven't had a car of my own in years and years. Like, I've driven cars through the radio station, but I've never had a car of my, I say, I've never, I've had a car of my own. The last time I had a car that I made payments on was in 2015, I think, 2015 or 2016, I think, was the last time I had a vehicle that I actually made payments on the vehicle. So it's been almost a decade since I've done that. But like, I'm not some of the desires fancy shit. You know, I want to have a nice little house. You know, like my house now is kind of old, antiquated, like the doors barely open. It

makes a lot of noises. Like, I would love to just have a solid, modern little house. Like, my townhouse home in Houston that I was paying, you know, I think I was paying like $1,900 a month to live in Midtown Houston. I liked it. I liked a little space. I liked to get a little smoker. Like, that's the thing that fascinates me about people, man. It's maybe when you have money, like a lot of it, it changes you to the point that you

start thinking you want shit that you don't need or actually want. But, like, I had decent money at one point in my life, man. Like, I was cooking for a guy who was at the time 20 or 30, I guess I just turned 30 and was making, I mean, serious. bank at 790 and I had a lot of cash. I told you this. At one point I had a lot of cash to the point that I walked into Mattress Mac and I dropped like 15 grand on furniture. Just like, oh, here's 15 grand. I have it. Like, it was stupid. Like, I'd love to get back to that in life or half of that I would like to get back to. But like, I look back on that and I'm like, I've never been someone

that desires fancy shit. Like, I'd like to think that if I got, you know, back to a point where I was making serious bank again or good bank again, that I wouldn't be out there like, well, here's my eight-room house. I don't need an eight-room house. I don't need a mansion. Like, people do that because, like, they can and because, like, they think they have to. But, like, the reality is these are not situations where it's like, where, like, you feel that you must. Like, you don't have to have it. Like, my dad lived in a nice house when I was a kid. When I was a kid, like, the house we lived in, when I was in high school, part of middle school and in high school, in Louisiana. My dad had a nice house. I wonder how many square feet that house actually was. I'm genuinely curious how many square feet we're talking about. Let me look up our old house. Like it wasn't a mansion. He added some shit to it, like added another room to it. But let's see. My old house, this is in Port Allen. I want to say it was over 3,000 square feet. Let's see. It's on Zillow. Is that our old house? Yes, it is. 3,100 square feet. And they added another room to it. They added a game room to.

it and it had a nice backyard and everything like that, okay? It's off the market, so nobody buy it. Dude, I've never thought to look this up. I wonder if, like, the Zillow has my old bedroom in it. Boy, like that was the house, like the house I most associate growing up, like all that. It was a 3,100 square feet house, like four bedrooms, three baths. It wasn't like a mansion by any means. It was like three of the house I live in now, but it wasn't what I would consider to be, you know, a mansion. Let's see if I can find actual pictures here. Man, no, look, there's the backyard. Yep, that's the, that's the backyard.

Oh, wow, dude, holy shit. Talk about a trip down memory lane. That is totally the backyard. There's the living room. I think they changed the floor in the living room. I mean, it looks a little bit tackier on the inside than it used to. Then there's the game room. I think dad even left all of his shit in the game room.

I actually know, this must be the house because it's got old scooby shit. So these pictures have to be old. So I don't know when these pictures are from. again, none of you will care. I wonder if my old bedroom is in there. Wow, how about that, man? Yep, that was our old dojo. Holy shit. The game room kicked ass. Fuck, that was living, man. Yep. And like, unlike that house, I never viewed that house as some sort of mansion. I mean, it's a nice size house, 3,100 square feet, four beds, three baths. They added a game room, too. It was a nice little setup. It wasn't a mansion by any means. You know, like, if I had that life, oh boy, that is,

holy shit these pictures are so old that our dog is sitting outside on the deck and that dog has been dead for a long time wow there's the pool again none of you will care about any of this and I'm well aware of that but I look at this house so this house sold in 2012 for $373,000 like that's a nice house I don't even need a house that big the house my dad eventually moved into after he got divorced, I'd take that, which was like 1,600 square feet. I don't need a mansion by any means, but I don't know. Why I brought this up, I don't know, why this matters to any of you, I don't know. I just think part of it is because you look at this and you're like, you're like, why, like,

I guess this all started with this conversation about the suite at the Texans game. Like, if I ever came into, like, money where I was comfortable again, like, I can survive now because I don't have kids or anything and Jilly makes some nice money in our combination. Like, we're not hurting. but it's like I'm not like flush with cash or anything like that. It's not like I'm loaded with money, right? So like when I look back on when I did have money, I never desired to have fancy shit.

I never really bought fancy shit. I had enough money where I could. Like if I wanted to go buying an expensive watch, I could have bought an expensive watch. Not like a Rolex, but I could have bought a nice watch. I never wanted a nice watch. I could have driven a fancier car than I did. Never wanted to drive a fancy fucking car because it didn't do anything for me.

It didn't mean anything to me. That kind of shit never did anything for me. My biggest vice is that I like to fucking gamble. Dude, if I didn't gamble, I'd probably still be pretty well off, but I'm a degenerate asshole. But I look back on that, and I'm like, I see stuff like this, like, well, you can get the 6,000 square foot space. It'll cost you $20,000 for an initiation fee and $100,000 for the membership. Like, none of that interests me, like all the fancy shit about a club. I'll go to a football game and just, like, sit in the stands.

but having someone come pick me up at home and drive me to and from the game now that is so like there's certain things where you're like I want it like I want to take advantage of like the money that I have right like you know you want to be able to like if you want to go on a trip there's no concern right like that's the kind of money I'd like to have I like to have the kind of money where you're like you know what I want to fly to the LSU game on Saturday no matter what the price of the flight it's oh it's $1,000 a ticket fuck it I'll go because I have the money and I think I probably could have swung that when I was at 790.

Like, that's the kind of life I want to live. Where, like, there's just, like, you can do shit you want to do, the experiences you want. I don't need an eight-bedroom house, nor do I desire an eight-bedroom house. I don't need a Maserati, nor do I desire a Maserati. And, like, look at A.J. Brown, again, I don't know what all he drives. He might have 10 different cars, and that just might be his I drive-to-work car, and I don't want to run the risk of someone breaking into it while I'm in the game. So here's my Honda cord.

This is the one I put the miles on. Like, I guarantee he's got other cars. But, like, that's all I need. I've never been someone that desires luxury. Like, I don't like sweets at games. That's not really my thing. Like, it's cool that there's money and everything. I'd rather sit in the stands.

It's just never been my vibe to sit around in clubs and sweets and everything like that. I've never been into that. Except I do like that the booze is free. So I don't have to spend 15 bucks a pop to buy a 20-ounce beer at a ball game. So the booze being free is the high point. But other than that, like, I don't need, like, clubs don't mean. anything to me. I don't go to football stadiums to experience the club-type

atmosphere. I go to the game because I want to watch a fucking football game and feel the vibe of the crowd. But all that said, if I had the opportunity to score a ride to and from every game with my ticket in a fancy, probably BMW

type of vehicle, now I wonder if they pick you up like in a group. Like I wonder if like each individual person gets picked up by their own BMW or if they give you like, you know, all right, we've got a BMW van and it's going to come by your house at eight in the morning and it's also got like 30 other people, like a church van is picking you up. You know what I'm saying? Like I used to ride in the church van with my grandpa who had

to go pick up all the slow people that were being picked up for church at the Methodist Church. Like I wonder if that's how it does. Like someone picks you up like it's a school bus. Like it's a route in the morning. Or if you get your own driver. Like your own individual driver picks you up in your own individual BMW and says all right let's go or do you get picked up in like a group situation where like all right we're running by your house

hold on we're going to the stadium in just a second we got to stop by Katie as well because we got to pick up Tom and Sarah Tom and Sarah are also going to get in the van and everybody piles in like you're in a shuttle like is it more of a shuttle or do you get your own individual thing to me for $100,000 I better get my own fucking ride and better be

in a fancy fucking car if I'm spending $100,000 now the idea is I'm never actually going to be spending $100,000 or who gives a fuck. Boy, I do covet that, though. Like, not that. Like, I don't aspire for, like, fancy, uppity shit like that. I aspire for comfort.

And I think that's what most people want. They want comfort in life. And that's what I'm trying to get back to where it's just kind of like, fuck it. If I want to drop, you know, like I bought my mom a cruise. I bought her and her husband a cruise back when I was at 7-9. It was like, I was like, two grand. Fucker.

Here's that. Oh, I bought dinner for the family. Two grand for whatever. Oh, cool, you know? Like, that's what I want to be back to. I don't know that I want to be field level sweet at the Texans game wealthy. But I would like to be get picked up by a BMW and take you to and from the game wealthy. And I know what you're saying.

Well, Josh, why don't you just get an Uber? Uber's not the same. I want the comfort. I want a vehicle that I can drink booze in to and from. I don't want to sober up on the way home. I want to keep the party fucking going. More to come.