The Josh Innes Show - BBB: Locker Room Dong

Episode Date: December 21, 2023

Hey Everyone! I'm back. Today I filled in for Tim McKernan on 101 ESPN. Let this serve as a bit of a sample show to give you an idea of what you could hear on this here pod. Essentially, I pissed a bunch of people off. Now, it's never my intention to do that. I just say what's on my mind and at times that makes people angry. That said, I refuse to change my opinions because I may upset some folks. In this episode we dive into how sports world is no like the real world. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Hello! It's Josh, in for the balloon party today. They let me out of the old folks' home, Jackson. I'm over at Casey normally. It's like Cocoon. I got to escape the old folks' home and come over and hang out with you guys for a day. Shout out to Wilford Brimley. Yeah, Wilford Brimley gets a shout out there.

And I, too, have diabetes. I'm just like Wilford Brimley, except mine's type 2. And because I take the Monjaro, my diabetes has gone down a bit. I'm still fat, but not as fat and not as diabetic. So that's how I roll. I just tell you my whole life here. But welcome into the balloon party. I'm Josh, in for Tim.

Jackson's here as well. Now, here's the thing. So I'm trying to relaunch my podcast, basically because I see the success you guys have. You have this massive podcast with this huge following. And I have a decent podcast, and I did it for about three years after I got fired for the second time. I launched a podcast when I was living in Houston, and it had a pretty good following. Not as big as yours, but a good following of people. And then last year, around this time, I stopped doing it. I've taken like a year off. But then I was talking to Tommy

and he was like, listen, no one's listening to you on Casey. You have like no listeners. So can you try to like launch your podcast again and maybe we can have people find you that way. And I said, sure, I'll give it a shot. So I'm using today and tomorrow filling in for Tim as kind of a jumping off point for this podcast. I needed to rename it. It was just called The Josh Ennis Show. And if you look for The Josh Ennis Show anywhere on podcast platforms, there's like 14 of them, because basically for the last decade, every show I've done has been called The Josh Ennis Show. So Houston, The Josh Ennis Show. Nashville, The Josh Ennis Show.

Here on KC, The Josh Ennis Show. So I needed to come up with something else. And Tommy goes, well, why don't you go with something that, do you name it something that revolves around things you enjoy? I said, well, I like beer. He goes, yeah, who doesn't? I like domestic beer. I like Bush Light in particular.

I love Bush Light and Coors Light. Those are my two beers of preference. A lot of people are snobs when it comes to beer. Are you a beer snob? I wouldn't say snob. I enjoy myself a locally sourced craft brew every once in a while. So do I. I enjoy that. I have nothing against it. But if you said, Josh, you can have one beer

for the rest of your life. Well, in fairness, it might be Luke Bryan's 32 Bridge or whatever the hell it was called. He had a beer. Luke Bryan has a delicious beer. I don't know why he does, but he does. But it's good. But if I could have a second beer, and it's like

this is the only beer you can have for the rest of your life, it would be Bush Light. I just love a good Bush Light. I like to head for the mountains. That's what I like to do. So, I like domestic draft beer. I love driving by the brewery and smelling

the hops that I'm smelling when I drive by the brewery. I was driving is it, the hops that I'm smelling when I drive by the brewery? I was driving through downtown last night to go see the Arch because the Arch is now all lit up beautifully now, by the way. See the new LED lights on the Arch? It looks great. You got this beautiful monument, this beautiful piece of architectural brilliance, and it's never lit up, and now it's lit up and it looks great. So I went down there to see it. And I'm driving by the brewery and there's that smell. I'm rolling down the windows. I'm getting high off of that smell.

I just love it. I'm addicted to it. I love domestic beer. I don't know why. I just love bush-like, Coors-like. That's the stuff I'm into. Then I also like sports. In particular, I like to bet on sports because I'm a degenerate.

I hear you guys all the time talking about betting like sports. In particular, I like to bet on sports because I'm a degenerate. I hear you guys all the time talking about betting on sports. Would we consider Tim to be a degenerate gambler? I wouldn't say degenerate. How do we define degenerate? A degenerate to me is someone who chases. Like you lose your ass on Sunday and then you put all that money you lost on the Monday night football game. Do you consider someone betting on Ukrainian table tennis to be a degenerate?

Unless they're really into the sport, then yes. Betting on the Pro Bowl is always my barometer. If you're betting on the Pro Bowl... I'm a degenerate. I don't know what to tell you. I'll be betting on games and I'll get so angry in the middle of them that I'll drive from Kirkwood back across the river to go bet in the middle of the game. I love live betting.

Live betting to me is the greatest, the best. And this is a gift I'm giving you guys here today. This is my system. I call it the gistum. It's the Josh Ennis system. Okay. On foreign hockey. So whether it be like in Sweden, Switzerland, the Ukraine, doesn't matter. Keep an eye on those games and live bet them with three minutes to go is the last time you can kind of live bet a hockey game over in Ukraine, whatever. Find the team that's winning and bet for the empty net goal, essentially. It really works when it's a two-goal game. If it's like four to two with like three minutes to go, you take the team that's got four goals to score an empty netter, and it's usually plus money. That's the

gist of them. Also, basketball overs, like in-game overs, that's also a Josh Innes system. It was very successful once when I was doing that on like Ukrainian basketball. I got up like 20 grand doing that, and then I lost all of it, and then now I'm like, overall, my betting history, I'm like 20 grand in the hole.

I'm not a great gambler because I'm not disciplined. You need to be disciplined in gambling. To me, that's what makes me degenerate is I'm not disciplined. If I were disciplined, I'd make a living gambling because I know things. I have a gift. I don't know why. People ask me, Josh, how did you come up with the gist of it? How did you just decide one day, hey, I'm going to bet empty net goals and it's going to

win and it's going to be amazing? I said, I don't know. I just did it one day and I realized there was value. The problem I run into, Jackson, is I don't know when to stop doing it. And then I'll get up and then I lose. And then I do what you said. I chase. I'm just not a disciplined gambler. I'm just not good at it. That's why I'm like 20 grand in the hole and I do what you said. I chase. I'm just not a disciplined gambler. I'm just not good at it. That's why I'm like 20 grand in the hole and I'm a degenerate. That's just me. But that's the second thing I like, sports slash betting on sports. I also enjoy barbecue.

Now, barbecue is delicious. I just started trying to learn to smoke meat a couple of months ago. I bought one of these pellet grills. I'm not going to take the time to learn how to light wood and charcoal. Do you know how to light a charcoal grill? I grew up with charcoal grills, so I do. You're better than me. I'm not a man.

I'm an inferior man to you. I don't want to deal with it. I just want to put some pellets, some rabbit food, some hamster food into a little hopper and let it heat up and go. So I've started trying to learn how to smoke meat. Brisket's. Haven't really successfully done that yet. Made a nice pulled pork one day, a little pork butt, some ribs, all that. That's what I'm into.

So what are the things I'm into? I'm into beer, particularly domestic beer. I'm into betting slash watching sports. My favorite teams being the St. Louis Cardinals, the New Orleans Saints, and the Louisiana State University Tigers, who I know you guys bang on a lot. I've heard you bang on Brian Kelly a lot. Like our coach doesn't dance with recruits. Your coach also didn't beat LSU.

I was there. I watched it. But also, I dig meat. I dig smoking meat. And that's kind of the concept of this podcast and name. Tommy said, name a podcast after things you enjoy. So I did. And now the podcast has been relaunched.

So go to wherever you get podcasts right now. I'm going to use Tim McKernan's audience because it's a large, giant, vast audience of people. And if I'm going to be here for two days, I might as well use this audience. If you like what you hear, search for beer bowls and barbecue anywhere you get podcasts. Is that good? We good with that? Yeah, I like it. You guys care if I pimp myself a little bit?

Please. Now, other things going on in the world. Obviously, Chief got fired last week, and everybody's been worked up over that, right? Oh, yeah. Say, oh my God, Chief. Now, at the time that the Blues won the Cup, I was living in Houston. And I went to a hockey bar every game and watched it rooting for the Blues. I had my Play Gloria shirt on.

I was ready to go. I get into the Blues. I was rooting for the Blues. I understand why Chief is such a beloved person. I get it. I dig it. However, when Chief got fired and everybody's all worked up, how dare you fire Chief? Oh, no.

My issue with people getting worked up over that is if you watch the product. Now, from what I listen to, you like hockey, but hockey's not something that you follow avidly. That would be an accurate, a generous statement. I think that's a lot of people. The average person, in particular in towns that aren't hockey towns, that's how most people are, right? Right. The average person, in particular in towns that aren't hockey towns, that's how most people are, right? So when I think about the Blues, when I moved here, I was excited. Hey, I get to go to a bunch of Blues games now. Tommy gives me tickets.

That's how they pay me, actually. They pay me in hockey tickets, and I appreciate that. So I've gone to five or six games. The reason why I didn't care that Chief got fired is because the Blues are unwatchable. And you can blame the players, which I think is fair, because they've built a roster that not only isn't exciting to watch, it's never going to be exciting to watch. There's not a big star on there. There's not a Conor Bedard, because the league rigged it for the Blackhawks to have Conor Bedard.

So there was no way the Blues were ever going to get one of those guys. So you don't have a young, up-and-coming team to watch, and you also don't have a team that's competitive trying to win the Cup. So you have a middling, boring hockey team. And someone was going to have to pay for that. The GM didn't end up having to pay for it, and you can't fire 30 players. So what do you do? You fire the coach.

Obviously, some message wasn't getting through. But I don't know how you feel about sports fire the coach. Obviously, some message wasn't getting through. But I don't know how you feel about sports consumption, Jackson. But for me, a team has to either be really good, which in turn will make them fun to watch, or they just have to be really fun to watch and have a big upside. The Blues have neither one of those. They're unwatchable. I don't know how you feel about that. When you try to turn on a Blues game, what goes through your mind? How do you feel? What are the emotions you feel when you turn on Bally Sports and you watch the Blues? Well, once I get through the wonder that is the Bally Sports app and re-log into multiple accounts for some reason that they make me do whenever I sign into the lovely Bally's app, which is just on the...

And why does every studio of theirs look like it's in a dungeon? It's poorly lit? It's the forefront of technology is what we call the north star of technology why they're broke uh it's i just turn it's yeah kind of the life doesn't seem to be there all that much with this team yeah like i'd like to watch something that's either trending upward or is already really good they're in the worst possible position of being boring, going nowhere. So someone had to get fired. Like, let's say he kept chief. Is chief going to fix what they have if they don't have players?

No. So someone had to get fired. He got fired. Like, I don't really care. Like, I know a lot of people are upset about it. I like the guy. I get why you like the guy. He brought the first cup here.

I love the guy. I just don't care that he got fired because I want to watch entertainment. We have a very short time on this earth, right? We're not here very long. You're here one minute. I'm 37 years old. In my mind, it was only 20 some odd years ago, I guess almost 30 years ago, I was in my grandma's house crying because the Cardinals blew a three games to one lead against the Braves. How old are you? I am 25. So you're 25. So you didn't live that one. That's when you didn't live. Okay. 1996, three games to one lead, 32 to one were outscored in 1996. I had a bottle of root beer ready to shake up and squirt on my grandma. We got blown out 32 to one over three games. Ozzie retired. It was the saddest moment.

My first sports-related tears were overblowing that series. And that team is one of my favorite Cardinal teams ever, with Brian Jordan and Ron Gant and Gary Gaietti and Andy Bennis. And the Eck, Dennis Eckersley, was closing it down, and Ozzie was there. And then there was Royce Clayton. But Tony was like, we're playing Royce Clayton. We're not playing Ozzie Smith, even though Ozzie outplayed him. All that. A sports-related sobbing that I had in that game, right?

I get it, and I understand it, and I dig it all. But, like, my issue that you run into is you've got to be exciting. You've got to be interesting. We have a short period of time on this earth. Entertain me. I'm not one of these people that yells at fans and says, oh, you're fair weather if you don't watch the team when they stink. You got to love us when we're losing and love us when we're winning.

No, I don't. I don't have to do that because I have limited money because I gamble my money away. So I don't have much. So if I'm going to go downtown and I'm going to park for a hockey or baseball game, and I'm going to spend money on tickets for a baseball game, and I'm going to buy the beer at a baseball game, or I'm going to take the train or take an Uber to a baseball game, it better be exciting and fun, or I'm just not going to go.

Those days of, well, you've got to ride and die with your team, those are over. People have other things to do. I can watch anything I want on my phone. I can bet on anything I want on my phone. I can bet. I can watch movies. I can watch porn. I can watch whatever I want on my phone. I don't even have to leave home. It costs me nothing to go have fun, and it costs me a lot of money to go watch a bad product. I'm not going to go watch a bad movie just because I want to go to the movies. That's a waste of money. So if you're the blues, I get why they fired Chief, because you don't want to lose people, because most a waste of money. So if you're the Blues, I get why they fired Chief,

because you don't want to lose people, because most people think the way I do. Most people are not sycophants who I'm with them when they win and with them when they lose. Most people are constantly on Twitter and they're looking at stuff and they know the team stinks. And they're not going to go blow their money and light it on fire if they're not getting a return, a return on investment, right? My investment is I love the Cardinals. When I moved here earlier this year, I was thrilled because we're coming off the playoff

year. We'd stunk in those two playoff games, blew the game in the ninth against the Phillies, then never showed up in the next game. But I was excited. I said, for the first time in my life, I live in St. Louis and I get to go watch my baseball team. By about a month into it, I was kind of over that glow. And I said, I'm not going to waste my money going to watch this horrible baseball team play.

And I think that's how people should operate. You should speak with your eyeballs and speak with your wallet. Speak with your credit and debit card. That's how you should do things. And I think smart people do that. It's the kind of dopes that yell at you and say, you're not a real fan. I went to every game this year, even though it was the worst season ever. Well, then you're a dope and you wasted a lot of time. Bless your heart. You could have been doing something better. All that said, the Blues are boring. And I don't blame you

if you don't watch them because, you know, they're not interesting. And I think a lot of people think that way. And we can look at the texts on this and everything else. But I am a person who is looking for entertainment. And I think most people are looking for entertainment. Like, tell me a movie you like. Oh, so many. Well, sure. I know I put you on the spot there.

That's unfair. But this year, David Fincher released his movie called The Killer. Okay. And it's outstanding. Okay. Bad example. Do you like Rocky? I love Rocky.

Do you like the Rocky series? Four is outstanding. Okay, bad example. Do you like Rocky? I love Rocky. Do you like the Rocky series? Four is outstanding. Okay, so let's say you only saw Rocky up to Rocky III, and you didn't like Rocky III. Odds are you wouldn't go see Rocky IV. You're not going to say, I'm going to invest my money in Rocky IV if the series began to suck. Unless you're just really committed to Rocky. But let's say you watched the first two, you were you refine the third, you're like, I don't like where this is going.

I'm done. I'm not going to waste my money. To me, sports is like movies. Sports is like anything. If it's not interesting, I'm not invested in it. And the blues don't interest me. And I'm sorry to tell people, and I think anybody with a brain knows this, the blues as an organization, as a team, are going nowhere.

They're not trending upward. They're not trending terribly. They're mid-lane. And there's nothing worse than mid-lane. So firing the coach, if that gets you fired up, cool. But the Blues are going nowhere. And that's what's frustrating to me. And that's why I can't watch them because it's just a snooze.

For every exciting game, they're 7-1. I was at the, what was the final, eight to four the day after Thanksgiving. They lost like eight to three to the Predators. And maybe I'm a little salty because I bet on them to win as well

and they didn't win and they were never in it. I left in the middle of the second period. But anyway. All right. If you want to get in, get in. What's the text line number, Jackson?

Do you know that number? Oh, is it up there? There, good. 314-399-9646. See, we don't have things like this over at KC. We don't have a big board that tells me everything I need to know because, well, we don't have a text line. We don't have a YouTube.

We don't have podcasts. We just have angry old people bitching that I'm not playing enough REO Speedwagon. So outside of that, I don't know what it's like to be over in this world anymore. Hey, and go follow my podcast. Go subscribe. Beer, Balls, and Barbecue is what it's called. And follow me on socials and everything, and we'll have more Balloon Party coming up on 101 ESPN. Balloon Party.

I'm Josh. And for Tim, Jackson's here as well. Normally I'm over feeding the old people peaches on KC. Today I'm here with you. I will be on KC later at 2 o'clock. Ready to go. Having all your REO Speedwagon and Head East, but today I've got the sports takes. Why are the people on the YouTube chat talking about taking off shirts?

Do you guys take off shirts? It just gets a little erotic in there. Oh, like on Balloon Party? Or on TMA? Both TMA and then sometimes that brings itself over here to Balloon Party. Does Tim ever take his shirt off during the show? We haven't, but we just like the thought of them.

I think my breasts might be too large if I did that. If I took my top off, then I think that it would be considered inappropriate because I'm not exactly svelte. I'm not against it. My bare breasts are on the internet in multiple places because I've done it before. A lot of times I get hammered at home on the weekends and I'll just go shirtless on Instagram sometimes because that's how I do things. You know, it's amazing. And I know you guys have your own problems in life, but I can drink all the like five

and 6% beers I want and not get hammered. But then I drink like a bush light and I'll have like 20 of them in an afternoon because they go down easy, you know, or a Coors light. And before you know it, I'm just blitz. The most blitzed I get is off of just domestic beer. Maybe because I don't drink the six percenters as fast. Do you like Christmas beers? Sure. Me too.

Now what's better, Halloween or Christmas beers? I'm not a pumpkin guy. You don't like pumpkin beers? God, I love pumpkin beers. More into Christmas. A little coriander up in there. I like ones that have a little peppermint flavor. Ones that have some cranberry in them. Yeah, but the problem is i

can drink all the heavy beers and it never seems to impact me but if i have you know one too many bush lattes then i you know i fall off a cliff but either way uh glad you guys are with us appreciate you now um there's another thing and i got a bunch of stuff to get into today but i only have an hour to get into it another thing i've been hearing from a lot of media people and fans, and I see this on Twitter and everything from people on social media, is that the issue with the Cardinals is their pitching, which it is. That's a fact. Their pitching stinks. Large part of that is because they kept trotting Adam Wayne right out there so they could sell his country concert, even though his ERA was seven. That hurt their team overall, but nobody wants to say that, and that's fine. But the pitching does stink.

Bullpen stinks. Starting pitching stinks. Totally get it. Fine. But it's like people live in this fantasy world where the Cardinals' offense is just some sort of impressive juggernaut. I remember listening to BK, and I think it was on opening day, and I agreed with him, so I'm not ripping him, but on opening day, it was, this Cardinals offense can outmash

anybody. We just gotta be able to stay in games. Then you realize the Cardinals offense can't outmash anybody, because the Cardinals offense is 19th in runs scored over the course of last season. And the argument people are making is, well, we've got to fix the pitching, and if we fix the pitching, then everything is fine. Not necessarily. Because the Cardinals offensively are banking on two old dudes

and Wilson Contreras, at least in terms of established talent, right? And those two, let's just start with Arenado and let's start with Goldschmidt. They have both regressed from 2022 to 2023. Each was about seven home runs off of where they normally are. Neither one of them got over 100 RBIs, right? So offensively, your two stalwarts in your offense have regressed. Wilson Contreras regressed from what he normally is. You have no idea what Nolan Gorman is. You have no idea what Nolan Gorman is. You have no idea what Jordan Walker is because they haven't been around that long. What is Tommy Edmund going to be?

And you get your mismatched people in the outfield. So people live in this world where offensively the Cardinals are perfect. They have no issues. We just got to figure out the pitching. Let me give you a little bit of data here because we're data-driven here. I'm going to give you a little bit of data here, alright? So the Cardinals were 19th in runs scored. 10th in the National League, they scored 719

runs. Only one team below 719 runs scored made the postseason. That was the Marlins, because their pitching was really, really good, right? Compare the Cardinals, who scored 719 runs. And I'll bog you down with numbers right now because I got to prove to people that I know sports and I'm going to give you all

the numbers I can here. So buckle up. And I had to take the time to write all these down, so I'm not going to waste them. The Braves scored over 200 more runs than the Cardinals did last year. 947. Dodgers, 906. Cubs, 819. Philly, 796. Cardinals scored 719. Okay. Four and a half runs per game the Cardinals scored. Remember that number. Four and a half runs per game. The Cardinals were also 24th in earned run average, right? Compare that to

Dodgers, Phillies, Rangers, right? And Atlanta. Those are three pretty good teams. All of those teams were first, second, third, or fourth in runs scored. First, Atlanta. Second, Dodgers. Third, Rangers. Fourth, Phillies. They were all also middle of the pack in terms of earn-run average. And I know that earn-run average isn't the end-all, be-all of everything. There are other statistics. You can look at WIP and WARS and

VIPs and VORPs and all that. But I'm looking at ERA for the sake of this because the Cardinals ERA-wise were 24th in the league. The Dodgers, second in runs scored 13th in ERA. The Braves, who are a freak show, first in runs 15th in ERA. Phillies, fourth in runs 12th ERA. Rangers, third runs, they won the World Series. I don't know if you knew that. The Rangers won the World Series. They were third in runs and 18th in ERA. What does all that matter? What does all that mean? We're in an era of baseball where pitchers are being marginalized and the game is being elevated, correct?

We've taken out the shift, which I love because it was boring. It made the game extremely boring. But it's a game that is now offensively driven, and they are building the game to make it more so. Pitchers are bitching because they don't have the advantages they used to. The mound isn't 18 feet high. You can't shift. They want to move the mound back. There's a pitch clock. There's a lot working against the pitchers. So while you're sitting here bitching and complaining about how the Cardinals haven't done enough in pitching, here's the pitching you need. You need situational pitching.

You need guys who can win two games for you in a playoff series, and you need some guys that can shut the door in the bullpen. Do they have those guys right now? Probably not. But the main thing you need in baseball is the ability to mash. Look at the Braves as a great example. Look at the Rangers as an example. The teams I just mentioned, they to mash. Look at the Braves as a great example. Look at the Rangers as an example. The teams I just mentioned, they can mash. You need to outscore people.

If you're going to have middle-of-the-road pitching, which the Cardinals will no matter what, this pitching staff's not going to be great. They're going to be at best middle-of-the-road. Then you've got to go out and score 800-plus runs. That's kind of the benchmark here. I look at the Phillies. They were 796.

They got really good pitching in the postseason, but during the season, you'd say, okay, they're fine. And then they go out and they mash. The Cardinals need Goldschmidt to mash. The Cardinals need Arnauto to mash. And they need Contreras to mash, definitely. Those are the three that you know historically can, but they've regressed. That's another thing that I find fascinating. So people love, some of the people I saw on social media who all wanted Sonny Gray and said, we got to have Sonny Gray. Then they bitched when they got Sonny Gray because Sonny Gray is old. Well, he's 34. You know, we don't know what Sonny Gray is going to do now. He's 34. How old is Paul Goldschmidt? And by the way, Paul Goldschmidt has shown regression, but you're just banking on Paul Goldschmidt. Ah, Goldschmidt will be back the way, Paul Goldschmidt has shown regression, but you're just banking on Paul

Goldschmidt. Goldschmidt will be back. He'll be fine. What about Aronado, who's what, 32, 33, 31, somewhere in the early 30s? Nolan Aronado regressed last year, yet now he's going to be fine. But I'm worried about Sonny Gray, who's coming off the best damn year of his career. I think people are inconsistent with the things they're concerned about. If all these things, and I think this is something that A.J. Pruszynski was talking about on a podcast or something, about how the Cardinals' main concern is offensive. And I've been saying that all year last year. You can fix pitching and do the best you can with it. If you're scoring eight runs a game, seven runs a game, you're going to be in most games and have a chance to win. How many Braves games last year were the Braves down 4-1 in the eighth inning?

And you're like, I guess the Braves are going to lose. Turn off the game. Tomorrow you turn on the TV and they won 5-4 because they can mash. And I think the Cardinals believe that somehow that Goldschmidt and Arnauto are Goldschmidt and Arnauto of five years ago. And last year was an indicator that they are not. So those guys have to be better. And if those guys are better,

you're probably not going to be 20 games under.500 this year. Alright. Alright. Break-wise, where are we at? Let's break now. We would do that? Yeah.

The clock works? Yeah, that works. We good there? Alright. Josh Ennis, M4 Tim, Balloon Party, 101 ESPN. Do they bitch at you for talking about basketball? Yeah. Is that the bit?

Yeah. Yeah. Yep. Betting on basketball is a good time. Yeah. Party 101 ESPN. Do they bitch at you for talking about basketball? Is that the bit? Betting on basketball is a good time. I used to really be into Mizzou basketball in the early 2000s. My favorite team in the world. Kareem Rush, Clarence Gilbert, that whole team. Arthur Johnson. Sure. I love that team a lot. They went to the Elite Eight and played Oklahoma in 2002,

and then they lost in the second round the next year to Marquette, I believe. But I love that team. Josh Kroenke, he was like the designated white dude on the team, and obviously you know why he was there. But he was there. Justin Gage, who went on to be a receiver for the Bears,

he was on that team. Wesley Stokes was on that team with the hair. Quinn, who was probably doing a little bit, stokes was on that team with the hair i like quinn who was you know probably doing a little bit but doesn't matter doesn't really mean that's the message board conjecture i don't know what's true and what's not the dude always looks strung out i mean the dude always like even at like 20 years later coaching utah quinn snyder still looks like andrew mccarthy and less than zero Like he's just strung out and his hair is all over the place and he's like 14

pounds and he's sweating. That was a big Quinn Snyder guy. Big Mizzou basketball guy, man. Quinn's in Atlanta now. That's where he is now? Yeah. You know basketball better than I do. All I will tell you is you should always bet team overs for the Pacers. They score a lot

of points. Albert,urton, man. What do you think about Draymond kicking all these people in the balls and tackling people and punching them? I'm with Shaq. It's the same intensity and fire that won four championships with the Warriors. I think it's possible for Shaq to be dumb, too. And here's what I would say. And I get that sports isn't real life. But if you annoyed me today, if I was like, I don't like your talk about the NBA, and

I just came over there and punched you in the temple, I'd probably get fired. But in sports, it's like, he's got competitive fire. Or as Steve Kerr said, he needs help. I hope he gets the help. No, he's just an a-hole. Why can't we just be honest about people? We try to protect people and say, well, maybe he needs help. No, he needs to get punched in the face.

That's the only way to solve a bully is to fight a bully. And at some point someone just needs to cold cock a Draymond Green and knock him on his ass. And then maybe that solves the problem. Nobody needs help. People that need help are people that have debilitating drug problems.

People that got hooked on Oxycontin because the pill mills were pumping them down their throats. Those are people who need help. People that just kick people in the balls constantly in the NBA are not people who need help. But I'm also aware that sports world is not real-life world. Like, I can't punch you in the face. I can't do that.

Only in sports world, like, let me give you an example, like sports world versus real world. Like I can't punch you in the face. I can't do that. Only in sports world. Like let me give you an example, like sports world versus real world. So back in the day, they used to send me into locker rooms to get audio from football players. I don't know why, because I was always hammered. Like I'd get hammered in a suite during the game. I went to Texans games, the Houston Texans. And I'd get hammered because it was all the free beers, like Miller Lights, all you could drink, me and my buddy would chug a lug. I'm like, wow, Clay Walker's in our suite. This is a great time. And we're having a good time. But then my boss would still send me into the locker room to get audio. So in my history, I have drunkenly asked a question at a press conference about the wrong

team. Now, funny story about that is, I never ask questions in press conferences. I'm a bit shy. But I had enough alcohol where I asked Marvin Lewis, it was after a playoff game, the Texans had beaten the Bengals in the playoff game, and I was blitzed. And I'm sitting there with my buddy, and I'm like, should I ask a question?

He's like, yeah! I'm like, rock on. So, I go, Marvin, hey, you've beaten the bangles twice no wait you are the bangles you've beaten the texas twice uh and i just kind of trail off and he's like huh i don't understand i'm like never mind and then i think in that same day i drunkenly tried to interview um aj green don't remember anything about, but my buddy said it was humorous. They used to send me into the locker room.

They'd be like, hey, go get audio. The interesting thing when you compare sports world to real world is there isn't a locker room here at Hubbard where everybody is naked and they just allow randos to walk in while you're naked. But in sports

world, that world exists, right? Like when you walk into a locker room in the NFL, it's like the BBC category on the hub. It's just nothing but dong everywhere you turn. Now, some people are subtle about their dongs in the locker room. Other guys, notably like defensive backs, like stand there in a Superman pose while you interview them,

and they're like, hello. They're guys that'll get out the powder. This is the move. I'll show you on the YouTube. They'll do this move, and they'll powder while you're talking to them. I don't know if that's still the case, but dude, I have seen an impressive amount

of dong in my day in locker rooms, and these dudes just don't care. Now, I'll give you some dong examples. Some guys are a little bit more discreet about the dong, like Ben Roethlisberger. So Ben Roethlisberger, when he came out of the shower, Ben Roethlisberger had a towel on, and he put his underwear on under the towel and did this hop move there, and then the towel falls. On the other hand, there are guys like Bernard Pollard, who's a friend of mine, so this makes it awkward. But he used to play for the Chiefs, Texans, and Ravens, Titans, I think. He would just stand there like, all right, what are we doing? You're interviewing the guy.

You're like, wow, this is something. But I will tell you this, the most impressive sports dong I've ever seen is that in person, not on just the internet or, you know, like, oh, photos got leaked. Look at that dong. One that I saw with my own eyes, Reggie Bush. Beautiful dong. Now, where I saw this, I was at a Saints playoff game. I guess it was in 06 or 07. I think they played the Eagles. And he was dating Kim Kardashian at the time. So he's all over the TMZs and stuff. Kim Kardashian, she's out in the hall.

I'm like, holy cow, Kim Kardashian's here. I'm like 21 years old. I'm like, wow, how did I get here? Wow, Brent musburger just walked by wow i've made it and then there's kim kardashian and i walk into the locker room and there's just reggie bush just standing there and i'm like that's gotta hurt you know like like i give kim credit because she can clear she can take it like some people probably couldn't she had experience like have you seen ray have you seen Ray J's penis?

Well, I've seen the film. So then you've seen Ray J's penis. It is something. It is something. So once you've gone there, I don't know that anything else. What I would compare it to is like when a gentleman that plays baseball has a donut on his bat, and he's in the on-deck circle, and he's swinging like this, you know? Once he pops it on the ground and that donut comes off, that's not heavy anymore.

Well, once you've had Ray J, donut bat comes off. And I think that's what happened. But I have never seen Ray J's dong in person. I've never seen that. I've never met Ray J and said, hey, sexy, can I? And then like, hey, can I see your dong? Never done that. But I have seen Reggie Bush's dong. And look, I am not gay. And if I were, it wouldn't matter. I don't care if you're gay, straight, whatever. None of it matters to me.

But I'm a heterosexual man. Just because I'm not having a lot of sex lately doesn't mean I don't have sex with women or I haven't. I certainly have. But I can tell you when I've seen a beautiful penis. And what I can tell you is that Reggie Bush, it was eye-popping. Have you ever seen a live man's penis in front of you? I have not. No? I have not. Never?

Rarely in the locker rooms, though. No. Have you ever been in a locker room? Not a professional sports one. No. Do they still walk around? I don't know if college teams walk around naked. When I was in high school, we were all like,

we all showered in our underwear. Real talk, I played basketball. This might be shocking to people, but I did play basketball in high school, and I did score 19 points in a game once and went three for three from downtown in that game. Then they realized, maybe we should start guarding the white guy with the goggles. And then I probably never scored a basket again. But for that moment,

I was on fire. He's on fire. It was one of those. But let me tell you something, man. In high school, we would all wear our underwear. So you'd go into the shower, you'd shower in underwear, and then bring another pair of underwear to change into.

It was kind of like a weird science when they're in the shower with Kelly LeBrock and they both have their hands over their junk. That's what it was like showering in high school. Professional athletes don't do that. And they're like women that walk in there, dudes that walk in there. It doesn't matter. They'll just flop it around. Dudes are tripping over this stuff, man.

They can throw it over their shoulder like a continental shoulder. Does your dong hang low? That's what it's like in an NFL locker room. Baseball, I have been in baseball locker rooms. They don't have the pain sling as much as you do, you know, but the NFL guys just do not care. I mean, it's impressive. I think you should try it one time. Just go into a locker room, like an NFL locker room. Just kind go take a peek, see if that's still the case now that we've had this discussion I would imagine they're never going to let me in any locker rooms ever again

which is fine because I don't want to I don't fancy myself someone that needs to go into a locker room and get a scoop none of that really phases me and it never has, that's not why I did sports radio or any sports media it didn't really impact my life in that way. But

yeah, I think you should just say you did it. I'm an open-minded gentleman. And I think that's good. I think you need to be open-minded. I have gay friends. Do you have gay friends? I do. I do. And they're handsy, but I'm okay with it. I'm like, hey, look, I don't dislike you. You don't dislike me. We're happy people. If you want to be a little handsy,

whatever. You think I'm pretty, and I appreciate it. Alright, it's't dislike you. You don't dislike me. We're happy people. If you want to be a little handsy, whatever. You think I'm pretty, and I appreciate it. All right, it's 101 ESPN. Did you at least give me some credit for trying to be legit sports talk guy for two segments? I did try, and then we deviated into dong talk. I tried. Just not really in my DNA. I don't know what to tell you.

I see you guys have a text line over here. We do not have a text line at Casey. I just answer a bunch of phone calls from people who hate me. But here I get to see a bunch of people who hate me on text in real time, in real time. Like I that's it's not good for your psyche. Yeah. You know, it's it's it's I can imagine like these kids today, like when I was growing up, you didn't have all this. You assumed people hated you, but you didn't know. Now you just know people hate you. And it's interesting.

It's an interesting dynamic. It just kind of flows in like that. Yeah, it's kind of Schrodinger's cat. Are you going to listen to Adam Wainwright's new song? Are you going to buy it on Apple or anywhere like that that you can buy it? If it's available to stream on Apple Music, I'll give it a listen. It's called Time to Fly. It's the album that he

put out after he did absolutely nothing last year but was treated like a god for the entire season. That was a good time. Speaking of locker rooms, one of the coolest locker room experiences I ever had was with Adam Wainwright. I was in Houston, and I went down there after they clinched in 2011.

That epic night of the Rays had to win here and the Phillies had to do this against the Braves. It was that epic night of baseball. I was in the locker room, had my Cardinals jersey on. I used a media pass to go down there. I'm not a good media person, but I wanted to go celebrate with the Cardinals. And Wainwright had a Bud Select, and he looks at me and my buddies, and he goes, these guys are too dry. And he shakes it up, and I'm like, this is the greatest.

So I love Adam Wainwright. I just hate 2023 self-serving Adam Wainwright, who was horrible at baseball and then had a country concert that only dopes cared about. And if you were one of those dopes, I'm sorry, but you are a dope. I like you, and I'd be your friend and you should listen to my podcast, Beer, Balls and Barbecue with Josh Ennis, but you're a dope and that's okay.

Other stuff before we get out of here. Let me see here. I was gonna tell you, and I guess I could, I learned something about now that I've lived here for like seven, eight months now. And I've been a Cardinals fan my whole life.

And I've rooted for the Blues and all that kind of stuff. And I appreciate it. And I love living here. And everything about it's great. It's a real bizarre world for me to live here now because I grew up. I spent a lot of time in Poplar Bluff as a kid because that's where I was born. And my family's from there. But I've moved all over the place with my dad who's in radio and I've done radio.

So I've lived everywhere. And it's really cool to have the opportunity to be on the air in St. Louis. But we talked about it earlier in the show. I'm here during a time where the blues are as unwatchable as they've ever been. They're just not watchable. The product stinks. Sorry. They just are.

I've seen people on this text line bitch at me. Oh, you say bad things about the Blues. Friend, you can't watch that and tell me you enjoy it. Maybe you're a diehard fan and it's just the only thing you like, so you watch it. It is not fun to watch. The Cardinals, for the last, outside of 2019 for the most part, they've also spent about a decade being tough to watch because they play a boring brand of baseball that lacks personality.

You know, you watch the Braves and they have fun players. You watch the Braves, and they have fun players. And you watch the Phillies, and they have fun players. And then you watch the Cardinals, and it's like a lot of dudes who are like stick-up-their-ass players. It's almost like the Cardinals do everything they can to make their players boring. And that bothers me, and I've always felt this way, even though during the Pujols and Edmonds in the early 2000s, I love those teams. But then you got Matheny in here, who's just a total stick up his ass guy. Like I hated Mike Matheny with a passion. I actually really liked

Schilt. And now they're kind of back to stick up your ass Cardinal way team. And, you know, like I hate to say this because I'm a diehard Cardinal fan, but maybe it's time to just take an ax to the Cardinal way and start doing it, I don't know, the Braves way or the Phillies way where you go out and spend some money and get good players who have great personality and are fun to watch, not a bunch of stick-up-their-ass guys. And I think

that's kind of who we are. And even if we get fun guys, the Cardinal way turns them in to stick-in-their-ass guys. Why can't we have fun and enjoy sports? It's like it's something it's like a prerequisite that if you're going to play for the Cardinals, you have to almost seem like you hate playing baseball. Like, oh, boy, like, you know, like the ultimate in this is you guys ever hear the commercial

that airs during Cardinal games on the radio with a little girl is voicing the commercial. And she's like, we believe in the hard nine, the gas house gang, Stan the man, white people playing baseball, missionary position sex, socks with sex. We are Cardinal Nation. We like REO Speedwagon. We are Cardinal Nation. I'm like, that's what we are. We like crappy pitchers who sing country songs. We are Cardinal Nation. We have no fun watching baseball anymore, and it bothers me. I'd like to have fun.

We are KMOX. Like, we're just boring. Everything about us is boring. It'd be nice if at some point the Cardinals, like, I get that they tried to get fun players. One of them drove off a mountain, which, hey, listen, you drink too much bush light, you drive off a mountain. That happens. But, like, point being in all of this, you know, have fun. Baseball should be fun. You know, the mid-80s, I wasn't alive for it, but the mid-80s Cardinals, I've watched every highlight video of those teams. That is the ultimate in fun sports. Dudes stealing bases, hitting gappers on what was basically concrete.

Center field's 420, so you're not hitting a ton of homers, but you're hitting gappers on what was basically concrete. Center field's 420, so you're not hitting a ton of homers, but you're hitting gappers, triples, stealing 300 bases a year. That's fun. The Cardinals are a stick-up-their-ass organization. And it bothers me because I'm a diehard fan. I see all the people bitching at me. Oh, what are you doing? You're ripping the Cardinals.

I'm a fan. I can say whatever the hell I want, Chief. There's not a certain rule about how you have to feel about a team if you're a fan. I'm a fan of the Cardinals just like you are. I find the Cardinal way to be boring and played out. What you should want to do is have the Phillies way, the Braves way, the Dodgers way. You know, ways that get you past the first round of the playoffs and maybe don't lose 95 games. All right. I guess I should get out of here on that note.

Go subscribe to my podcast, Beer, Balls, and Barbecue with Josh Ennis. All right. BK and Ferrario coming up next. It's been Balloon Party on, I almost said KC95. I couldn't say those things on KC95. That would just be, hey, here's Head East. But on 101 ESPN.