The Josh Innes Show - Detroit Weather Is A Nightmare...and random TV Talk

Episode Date: January 19, 2026

I'm aware that I talk a lot about the crappy weather in Detroit. It's truly a lovely town. I just don't understand how any human can choose to live in a place where it snows 7 months of the year. Somehow, we start talking about random TV Shows... Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

At Medcan, we know that life's greatest moments are built on a foundation of good health, from the big milestones to the quiet winds. That's why our annual health assessment offers a physician-led, full-body checkup that provides a clear picture of your health today, and may uncover early signs of conditions like heart disease and cancer. The healthier you means more moments to cherish. Take control of your well-being and book an assessment today. Medcan. Live well for life.

Visit medcan.com slash moments to get started. Um, anyway, other stuff. I was. I was talking with Jim today and I'm sitting here and all this fucking snow and Detroit's a nice place. I don't dislike Detroit at all, but I hate the fucking weather. Like it's wild to me that somebody would like know the weather that's here and go like, you know what I'm going to do today? I'm going to move to Detroit knowing that for six months, it's like you live in fucking Siberia. Like I woke up this morning just pissing snow. And I'm like, my God, it's just snow on top of snow on top of snow on top of. of snow. And I guess if you're like born into something like this, then I guess it's just fine because it's just what you do. Like, look, I wasn't born into like the Louisiana heat, but I live so long there that I feel like I kind of got used to it. It was kind of part of me because I went from Louisiana to Houston, basically the same fucking weather. Swampy, just sticky, nasty, 100 degrees in September weather, right? So like, I'm used to that. So I've lived that life. But I felt like I was kind of used to.

it and I was accustomed to it. So to me, like, yeah, I hated the heat, but because I lived it so long and I'm like, okay, cool, you know, I can't imagine living my life in Detroit and just like, I know that for six months out of the year, I'm in fucking Russia. Like, I got to, is it worse than the Philly cold? Exponentially worse than the Philly cold. Philly was rather moderate. Like, I'd go to games in December in Philadelphia and anticipate being super cold.

I never really was. I never got into a situation where I felt like, oh shit, I'm super cold today. Like, I'm not saying the weather was always great. Like, the most snow I've ever seen in my life was a snowstorm that happened in Philadelphia. So I'm not telling you that the weather was perfect in Philadelphia by any means. What I am telling you is that this weather here is like it is like hell. If hell is snow, then that's what we're dealing with here. Right.

Like, that's kind of what you get into now. Here, like, it is dreadful. Like, I was reading a story about seasonal depression and, like, hey, Michigan or Detroit is a big area for seasonal depression. Like, well, no shit. Of course, it's a shitty situation. Of course, they have seasonal depression. For six months, you're waking up every day to snow and getting snow off the car and scraping ice off the fucking car. Like, of course it is.

Like, I'm depressed every day that I'm. wake up. Like every day I look out the window and I'm just like, shit. Like, so if you want to talk about seasonal depression, like that, I got it. Because every day when I wake up, I look out the window and I'm like, fuck. Today I was walking my dog. My dog's a high energy dog. Ross, very, very high energy dog. And I'm not trying to sit here and break down the weather again because I've been accused and like messages I've gotten from people have just talked about weather and weather conversations born. Well, look, if you live in a place where it's like 65 degrees right now, your life is fine.

When you wake up in the morning to go to work, you wake up 4.35 o'clock in the morning and you go out to the car and you have to get a fucking brush out. You have to get all the fucking snow off the car. Then you have to make sure the car is running for a little bit before so the ice kind of melts on the window. And then you're slipping and sliding as you're driving. The other day, I was driving at like 10 miles an hour on the highway to get to work because it was like an ice luge. look, some people are programmed for snow. And I think if you're born into something like this, like that's what you do. Right?

Like you're just programmed to like live in the snow. Some people are, some people aren't. Again, if you're born in this and you live in it, what else do you know? Like, I guarantee you could talk to someone who's lived their entire life in Detroit. And if you were like, hey, it's December, January in Houston and it's 95 degrees, they'd go, go fuck yourself. And I'm sure they would. They wouldn't like it. but man like I you know me I hate wearing clothes I hate wearing hoodies I'm wearing

fucking sweats and fucking like duck boots and shit today I hate wearing this shit I hate putting on clothes I hate I'm wearing multiple layers like I'm wearing like if you guys want to have a peep show I'm wearing like long johns sorry for my fat stomach there but look you're all invested now I'm wearing like fucking long johns I'm wearing fucking multiple layers of socks It's so cold that when I drive in the car, like my feet get cold just driving. I mean, it's, look, it fucking sucks. I'm not going to lie to you. The weather fucking sucks.

As Tumasta says, you're a Hawaiian shirt and flip-flops, gentlemen of size. That's exactly what I am. I just, I want to dress like a fat Sammy Hagar. That's all I want to do. God forbid you have to use the toilet, says CW. exactly. I saw some video the other day on Instagram, like a reel, where someone's like, when my, when my hubby wants to start going at it, but it's wintertime. And she's like taking off all like 25 layers.

I'm like, shit. I mean, like, but that's how it is. Not that I would know about what it's like to try to get action in this time of year. There is no action. But it's still like, fuck. So I like, like, if you've lived in this, like, I know someone here that's. from Michigan that worked in San Antonio for a handful of years and hated it. So I can understand if you're someone that this is what you're used to and you got the four seasons and all that shit,

if you go down to, you know, Mexico and San Antonio and it's 900 degrees all year, then I get it. But if you're like Josh, just straight up weather wise, living wise, where would be a better place to live? San Antonio or Detroit? 100% San Antonio. I'd go hang out with AJ down in San Antonio. Because like I see here's the life I want to live. And this is a difficult life to live in a place where it snows five months out of the year. And it's cold for seven months out of the year.

As you know, is I want to have a smoker. I got rid of my trager because when we moved, I'm like, I'll let's get a new one. It's fine. So I got rid of the trager. And listen, before you knock me, oh, Trigger. Oh, boy, look at that pussy. Oh, it's like an oven. Yeah, it is.

And I don't give a fuck. I enjoy using it. So I got the Trigger. And I would go out every Sunday, man. And even in St. Louis, the weather got cold, obviously. But, like, I would throw pork butt on there. I would throw a brisket on there. And look, I wasn't great at it, but I loved it.

Like, I have a passion for learning about meat. I watch, like, the meat church videos. I watch all these different dudes that have meat videos. I listen to John Lopez's barbecue podcast. I just want to do that kind of shit. It's a passion. I have a passion for learning about smoking meat, baby. That's a passion that I have.

And it's just something that I don't even bother doing here. Like I'm not going to walk outside and five feet of snow and be like, let's roll out the old smoker. Plus, I live in a house that's like 900 years old and I need to have any outdoor outlets to plug in the fucking Trigger. So again, I'm well aware that I bitch a lot about the weather. But someone asked earlier, is it worse than the Philly weather? It is exponentially worse than the Philadelphia weather. Would you rather live in Detroit or St. Louis? That's a fine question.

Because there's many layers to that. There's more to do in Detroit because you can go see a hockey game, which you could do in St. Louis as well. But you could watch a hockey game. You could go to an NFL game, which I haven't because the NFL game tickets are $1 billion. I don't know what asshole spends that kind of money to go see a fucking football game, unless it's the biggest football game ever. But there'll be games where the lions are playing the New York Giants.

And to get in, it costs $500 a ticket. Like, sorry, I'm not spending $500. to go watch the shitty lions or the mediocre lions play the dog shit giants. I'm not going to do that. You get baseball, which you also get in St. Louis, but you also get the NBA, which you don't get in St. Louis. So you have options. And again, I have nothing against the city itself. I kind of like the vibe of it.

I think it's a cool place. But St. Louis, I just never really enjoyed, although they have a great park in St. Louis, and I do miss that. And the weather, like, there would be stretches where the weather was terrible. like you'd have a chance to get like 5,000 feet of snow in St. Louis, but it didn't stay there all damn year long either for six months. I guess the positive about this area is at least you'll get the, at least you'll get the, like, people know how generally speaking to like get the plows out and get the roads treated, whereas a place like St. Louis, they struggled with that. So at least you got that going here. But like I told Jim when I was texting him earlier, because we were talking about Landman and the hot chicks that are on. landman and the landman finale

last night and all that. And land man's fine. I don't think it's the best show I've ever seen, but I love Billy Bob Thornton and I really love Allie fucking Larder. Like, I just, I adore 50-year-old Allie Larder. In fact, I adore 50-year-old Allie Larder more than I

enjoy like 20-something-year-old Allie Larder and Varsity Blues. Like, I am all here 100% from middle-aged, sort of leathery-skinned, 50 years old, super tan, fake Texas-looking Alley Larder. Like that is hashtag my Alley Larder, and I'm here for it. So there's tons of hot chicks on the show.

I love Billy Bob because he's funny and I'd love him and I just, I've always liked Billy Bob. So like, you know, like watching the show, I enjoy the show, but it's like the show isn't spectacular. You know what I'm saying? Like, I wanted it to be better than it is, but like it's a good show. Like it's watchable. here's the problem I run into with Landman. The Landman ends up talking about a lot of shit that just sounds like the peanuts teacher to me.

Like with all the numbers and like here's the oil and here's like this and this and this. And before I know it, you kind of lose me. It's like, want, wah, want, want, want, want, want, wah, wah, wah, wah, wah, wah, wah, wah, wah, wah, and I'm like, I have no idea what's happening. You know, it's just kind of like, like, I know that, like, here's what I know. There's some oil shit and there's a hot Hispanic chick that's with this rat-looking guy that's Billy Bob's kid. the show and like there's a lot of shit that I like like I get the relationships in it. Once you start breaking down shit about oil and like here's Andy Garcia talking about fucking

oil. I'm like, I don't know what any of this means. I mean, you might as well be speaking Swahili because I have no idea what any of this means. But I do watch it and I enjoy it because I love Billy Bob and I love love love. I don't know why I just try. I love Allie Larder. Ali, she loves Trump. She loves. I love Ali Larder. So. sounds like me with Game of Thrones says King Blink. That's why I wouldn't watch that shit. Like I'm not going to sit there and spend an hour. And those are shows I can't follow.

Like shows that are set in like medieval times and shit, you have like no chance to have me like invested because I can't follow the shit. I also can't follow shit that's black and white. I like it's a wonderful life, but everybody looks the same to me in black and white. Is that Donna Reed or is that some other chick? I don't fucking know. I can't follow anybody in black and black and white. white stories. They all look like the same. And when you start putting a show that's like in

medieval times or you put a show that's in like, you know, if you start giving me a show that is set in like prehistoric times, medieval times, in Japan or anywhere in Asia, cannot follow shows in Asia. And I don't enjoy them. So like when the bad news bears went to fucking Japan, I didn't go with them. When the Ninja Turtles went to fucking Japan, you know who didn't go with them? This fucking guy. Crouching Tiger hidden bullshit. Didn't watch that. Like I just can't follow shows. Like I just I've turned off by shows that take place in other countries other than like England. But outside of that, like, I don't want to, I'm not going to watch shit that takes place in Germany. I don't get a fuck about Germany.

I can't follow it. All the fucking German people in the shows all look the fucking same. They all sound and look the same to me. It's like, it's like, again, they're all speaking Swahili. I can't get into it. It's just something that doesn't rev my engine in such a manner. And I won't even bother. You know, you're in another show that shows that are like that?

shows with mobsters, Italian mafia shows. I can't follow them. Because everybody's kind of the same fucking characters. There's old Polly, bleepie, blee, blee, blah, blue. And I'm like, I don't know what any of this is. Who are you? Like, what's the difference between like Pauley and you, whatever? Like, I don't know who these people are.

Like, I have no clue what any of that is. Bake Street. Let's see, Josh frigging in us. We miss you in the H, bro. I miss you too, brother. Thank you. H-up, H-up. But yeah, like, I can't follow any of that shit.

Like, I don't know if I'm the only one, but when I watch mob movies, I'm like, they all look like the same guy to me. I'm being like Italian racist here, I guess, but I'm like, I don't know what any of this is. Let's see, yes, I binged all of the Sopranos had no clue what happened after. Like, I don't know who any of these people are. They all got wacky fucking names and they all sound the same and look the same. I didn't do anything for me. Anyway, I know I've kind of gone off the rails there.