The Josh Innes Show - Dumb Lists

Episode Date: January 28, 2026

I was reading USA Today and the main story on the sports page was a ranking of the 59 Super Bowls from best to worst. I don't understand who would care to read this. I don't understand who would care to write this. That said, this leads me down the path of discussing lists and rankings of other things...I'm broken. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Visit medcan.com slash moments to get started. All right, everybody, welcome in. It's all up in us. I am Josh. Hello. Thanks for listening. I'm on USA Today because that's what I do with my time. Ranking all 59 Super Bowls best to worst. Where is Seahawks Pats 1.0? That's by Nate Davis. If my job were to go back and rank 60 Super Bowls best to worst, I mean, look, there are worse jobs. Let's be very clear. I mean, your job could be digging ditches. Your job could be, you know, driving a truck. your job could be, you know, moving port-a-potties or cleaning shit out of the port-a-potties. There are a lot of jobs that do suck, okay, that you do because you have to make a living.

But as far as jobs in the sports universe go, sitting down and ranking all 59 Super Bowls best to worst really seems like a colossal undertaking that just doesn't interest me. Like, it's one thing to be like, I'm going to rank, you know, the six or, you know, the six or, original Rocky movies or I'm going to rank Rocky movies plus Creed movies or all the Nightmare on Elm Street movies or all the Friday the 13th movies. We're talking things that go from like 7, 8, 9, 10, like you're maxing out at like 10. I don't know that I could sit around and just go, you know what, 59 Super Bowls. Let's go best to worst. Rock on. That seems like a really shitty time. And I'm sure someone will click on it and read it, right? Like I'm sure that

That's what the point is on the main page. People love lists. That's the thing about people. They love lists. They love rankings. That's how we are as a people. That's the kind of shit we're into. Lists and rankings.

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That's what people love. It's, um, you know, like it's something that is fascinating with people. That's why, you know, like your, uh, buzz feeds and shit like that. People love to just click on shit and go bang, bang, bang. bang, bang, bang, and then argue with it. Like I was, I saw a book on somebody's desk at the radio station today and it was the,

like the 5002 albums that define the 1980s. And I'm like, first of all, 500's way too many. Like at that point, every album ever is going to be included in there, right? Like any album of any significance is going to be included in a list of 500 albums, right? Like, if you're going to make a list about something, like really narrow it down. You know, go top. 10, top 15, top

five, right? Once you start digging into, well, here's number 499, like, does that really even fucking matter? Right? Like, what, you do these countdowns, like on all these rock radio stations on, I don't know, like Labor Day or Memorial Day or

July 4th or whatever it is, and all these rock radio stations they'll do like the top 500 or the top 1,000 rock songs. Like, once you start getting into the fours and 500, you're just throwing shit in there at that point. And is that song really all that fucking important if it's like the 450 greatest rock song of all time? Like coming in at number 456, here's walk on water by any money.

Are you like, does that song really even make a fucking difference in the world at that point? Like we used to run these things. I'm sure we still do it on this station. I just don't pay attention to it as much because I don't have to do anything with it. But when I was in St. Louis, I would be on the air usually on the Thursday or the Friday where like the big, not even a countdown really. I don't know what you'd call it, just like a list. I don't know. They would call it a countdown, I think, but it truly wasn't. I guess by definition it was because it'd go from number 500 all the way down or up to number

one. And I'd be on the air and have to play the songs that were on the list, you know, and I'd have to talk about them. And I think in St. Louis, song number 500 was some Henry Lee Summer song. It wasn't Hey Baby. it was whatever the other Henry Lee Summer hit was. The bigger Henry Lee Summer hit.

People listening to this right now are like, who the hell is Henry Lee Summer? But what was the name of that damn song? There was, Hey Baby, I wish I had a girl. So I wish I had a girl was like the biggest of the Henry Lee summer, mid-80s poppy rock songs. And it was at like number 499.

on the Keeshee Labor Day top 500 and I'm like if you're number, and I would get on the air and say this, like if your song is number 500 on this list, like do you even really fucking exist? Because at the end of the day, in this format, there's probably like a hundred rock songs that have really stood the true test of time, right?

Like songs that are going to play every fucking day. Like you will never hear I wish I had a girl by Henry Lee Summer ever. Like if I had the capability I would, but like you can go in and there are certain programs you can use to look up like songs and how many times they play in the country over the course of a day, a month, a year, whatever. I'm going to go out on a limb and say, I wish I had a girl by Henry Lee Summer, a beautifully mulleted man from Brazil, Indiana, who turned 70 years of age this past year. I feel pretty confident that the song I wish I had a girl by Henry Lee Summer.

has not played one time on one radio station all year, except for maybe, you know, Kishi 95, because they included in their countdown for whatever reason. But Henry Lee's Summer, I wish I had a girl. And if you come in, I would get myself in trouble because that's the kind of shit I would say. Like, here we are at number 499 with Henry Lee Summer. Who gives a fuck?

You know, that kind of stuff, because I'm a real wild card. But, like, you see, like, once you start getting into top 500, And imagine ever to be the asshole whose job it is to build this list, right? Like to compile the list of the top 500. Because if you say, hey, give me 10 songs, 10 greatest classic rock songs of all time. It's a lot easier to come up with 10 than 500, right? Now, you could argue it's tough to come up with 10 because there's probably 500 all-time great rock songs. Yeah, but are there really?

Like, there are 500 songs that you enjoy, 500 songs that are pretty good, 500 songs that have been hits. but how many of them are truly songs that stand the test of time? Like, let's look up a list. I'll bite because I saw this stupid ranking, the Super Bowls 1 to 59. How about we do this? Top 10 classic rock songs of all time. Let's see if we can find a list. 25 classic rock songs of all time ranked by Collider.

We'll use Collider. Actually, no, here we go. Chat GPT is from two years ago. Chat GPT gives me the 20 best classic rock songs of all time. All right, let me prove that I'm not a robot. So here's what they are starting at number 20. Another brick in the wall, part two, Pink Floyd. Come together the Beatles, Black Dog Led Zeppelin, won't get fooled again, the who.

The who when comes in at number, where was I at on the list here? I've lost it. So that is at number 17. All along the Watchtower, Jimmy Hendricks, 16, more than a feeling Boston. The Joker, Steve Miller Band, Dream on Aerosmith, Brown Sugar, the Stones, Purple Hage, Jimmy Hendricks. As you get into the top 10, don't stop believe in journey. Sweet Home Alabama, Skinnered, back in black ACDC, Free Bird Skinnered, born to run, Bruce Springsteen, sweet child of mine guns and roses, smoke on the water, deep purple, I would very much question that.

Hotel California at number three, Bohemian Rhapsody 2 and stairway number one. And you want to know how I know that those are like the defense. arguably the definitive classic rock songs of all time and chat gp t isn't all that wrong because on a given day most classic rock radio stations will play all of those maybe not brown sugar that's one that doesn't get played a ton and same with smoke on the water i don't know that i've ever worked on a radio station that played smoke on the water it like i mean they did at some point but like at no point where they ever like here's smoke on the water on 105 the rock nashville's classic rock like i'm fairly certain i never played that But chat GPT ain't wrong. I've worked in this thing long enough. And you look at the list and it's like, yeah. Although you know what I would include? I think that you shook me all night long.

Now I'm actually getting into a real debate about this list like an asshole. But I would say, Born to Run also doesn't play that much. If you're basing it just on radio hits, Born to Run doesn't play at all. I've also never worked on a radio station. I do not believe that just played Born to Run or Smoke on the Wall. water. But stairway to heaven, Bohemian Rhapsody, Hotel California, Sweet Child of Mine, free bird back in black, sweet home Alabama, don't stop believing, purple haze, dream on the

Joker more than a feeling, won't get fooled again, black dog come together and another one bites the dust. Basically 17 out of the 20 songs on a given day will play on any classic rock station in America. Now I want to look, now I'm going to chat GPT this after, you know, chat GPT kind of gave me an idea of what my tax return would look like and everything, because that's what I spent my night doing, trying to figure out how much money I'm going to need to pay my fucking taxes this year. Let's see.

What are the top 20 classic rock radio hits of all time? So there's got to be a difference between radio hits. I would also throw in, you shook me all night long, as I mentioned. To me, that's like the most top five most famous. classic rock songs of all time. It spans different genres. Here we go. Let's see if this is similar to this list.

If you're talking core, no argument, radio can't exist without these. This is the same list. No, actually, it's not. Okay, it's a little different. Here we go. So this is a different list. Stairway to Heaven,

Bohemian Rhapsody, Hotel California. So number one, two, three are the same. Skinnered Freebird is number four. No deep purple on that one. Don't stop believe in Journey is number five. That moves up from number 10. Give me Shelter the Stones.

Pink Floyd comfortably numb. That plays every day. ACDC Back in Black plays every day. Boston more than a feeling every day. See, this is where this list is different. Fleetwood Mac, go your own way all the fucking time. The Who, Baba O'Reilly. I also don't work on a ton of stations that play Bobbo O'Reilly a lot.

Sweet Child of Mine, yes. American girl Tom Petty, yes. Born to run at number 14, like, It's not. Like that song does not play. There's not a lot of Bruce Springsteen that plays on classic rock radio stations anymore. Beatles come together,

fortunate son CCR, jump Van Halen, the Joker Steve Miller band, and night moves. Number 20. A few notes, radio nerd stuff. The top 20 classic rock,

no repeat workday killers. Detroit specific top 20. Overplayed but still test versus, oh wow, this is some deep radio nerd. They were lying. Deep radio nerd shit. Top 20.

How about you give me, let's go to Philadelphia specific. Let's do that. Philly specific, because we have a lot of people and that's a good rock town. Houston's not a good rock town. Philly specific.

So let's see here. Philly is its own animal. Blue collar, Springsteen heavy, harmony driven, okay. So I'm going to guess, because I agree.

I think that Philly is going to be more of a who town. It's going to be like more bread. like true blue classic rock like it's not going to be a lot of your fucking uh off springs and shit like that philly is going to be springsteen who zepplin like tried and true shit born to run bruce springsteen thunder road bruce springsteen dancing in the dark zeppelin stairway to heaven hotel california the who bob seger ac dc billy joel piano man Like Philly's a tried and true classic rock town.

Let me see. Let me see. What about, I don't know how I got down this wormhole. What about Houston? Houston, they're going to say, yep, nobody gives a fucking Houston, like about most things. Houston is southern-leaning, blue-collar, riff first, allergic to anything that feels precious.

Think K-L-O-L-L-D-N-A, loud guitar, swagger, Texas Pride. Yeah! You know what that means? Z-Z-Top, probably. Yep, number one, Zizi Top, La Grange. Van Halen, Tom Petty, Aerosmith, The Who, Guns and Roses, Credence, the Eagles, Bob Seeger. So again, it's a lot of the same shit everywhere you go. Why I got into this, I don't know.

This started with me making fun of USA Today for having the top, the ranking, the 59 Super Bowl's best to worst. And then it led to me looking at lists of the top 20 classic rock songs of all time. Let's see here. Out of curiosity, what is the number one Super Bowl? I'm going to guess the number one Super Bowl of all time is the interception in the end zone. New England and Atlanta. I guess that'd be a better one, New England. No, I refuse.

I refuse to get involved in arguing with this shit. I will do no such thing. I'm not going to look at this. I'm not going to fall for this shit. And look at the 59 Super Bowls ranked. Each shit, Nate Davis, that is not going to happen. You will not suck me into your web, you son of a bitch.