The Josh Innes Show - Eagles Parade

Episode Date: February 14, 2025

I'm watching the early stages of the Eagles Super Bowl parade. No one does victor parades like Philly. Philly is truly the most passionate sports city in America. Apparently, I emailed the boss at 97.5 the Fanatic after the Eagles won the Super Bowl. I know this because I got a response today. CJGJ with a strong message for Swifties. My old station in Nashville did a great valentines day bit...and now I'm reminded of how dumb I was to leave. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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I've been watching some of the Eagles Super Bowl parade. Nobody does parades like Philadelphia. Now, granted, it's not like they've had a ton of championship parades in their history. You know, they've had a handful. They've had two Super Bowls, a couple of World Series, Stanley Cups way back when. So it's not like this is something that they do frequently. That's why it's such a big deal to them. Like, I think that's kind of how things work. If you win like seven championships, it probably gets boring after a while. Like, all right, another parade. Like, Jilly used's kind of how things work. If you win, like, seven championships, it probably gets boring after a while. Like, all right, another parade.

Like, Jilly used to tell me that when she was a kid, she was in Chicago, and the Bulls, you know, won six championships when she was a kid. And it was like, well, we just thought parades happened every year. It was just kind of a thing. Like, every year around June, we'd have a parade. Like, that was the expectation in Chicago. Whereas a city like Philadelphia that hasn't won a ton historically now finds themselves getting their second parade in the last what seven years eight years six years I guess and it's fucking awesome for them

so good for them and nobody does it like them that is look love Houston I love a lot of the places I've lived I love fans in a lot of the places I've lived I've love a lot of the places I've lived. I love fans in a lot of the places I've lived. I've enjoyed a lot of the places I've lived. But as far as just flat out passion and take from that what you will, you might look at that and say, well, yeah, they're sports more and is more passionate about sports than Philadelphia. That's kind of where we are in the world. Like, I live in St. Louis. Oh, best baseball fans in America. Yeah, cool. It's a different universe here, man. I'm in Baton Rouge.

Best fans, LSU. They put in 110,000. Yeah, that's fine. Saints fans are phenomenal. I'm a Saints fan. I dig it., I'm in Baton Rouge, best fans, LSU. They put in 110,000. Yeah, that's fine. Saints fans are phenomenal. I'm a Saints fan. Like I dig it. The dome is my favorite, but it's just a different buzz, a different vibe, a different level of passion that these people possess in Philadelphia. This parade is like eight miles long. So this parade is just going down broad from what I understand, like eight miles and it's packed the whole way. And it's going to get even crazier as they get closer to center city and they

get closer to city hall. And then they get down to the Rocky steps and that whole parkway there is going to be electric. Holy shit. Nobody does it like these guys. Like there's a lot of degenerates. They're fucking wackos. They're lunatics. They're crazy. We can make fun of how passionate they are about something trivial like sports. Totally get it. But I lived in Houston and I'm trying to get back to Houston and I love Houston and I love the people in Houston. Houston ain't this. You know, I tell you the story all the time about the World Series Parade, the 2017 World Series Parade. Like, it was almost like it was just a lunch break for people, then they went back to work. Not judging you for working, but that's kind of the vibe it got.

It wasn't wacky. It wasn't really crazy. The parade was fine. The speeches were the worst championship speeches you will ever hear at any championship celebration ever. I stand by that. On that, I will always stand that it was the worst championship celebration in history. Nobody wants to hear from shitty politicians and Sheila Jackson Lee and dudes that don't

speak English. And like, it was just the absolute worst championship celebration ever compared to this, which is going to be loco because these guys know they have to put on a show for these philly crazies dude so i was just looking at a picture on twitter cj gj who i loved when he played for the saints i've hated him everywhere else philly people hated him because when he left the first time he said they fucking suck now they love him again talk about the arc for cj gj so we talked about it earlier this week that uh chauncey gardner johnson um that cj gj was kind of at war with the swifty people because he talked shit uh about uh travis

and said he's just stuck with the black chick or whatever and the swifties got really worked up about it really upset about it very angry about it and took to yelp and everything to try to ruin a business that they thought was Chauncey Gardner Johnson's mom's business. But I think as it turns out, it's actually not her business or it used to be, but it's not anymore. So these evil, cunty, fake, nice, sad, stay at home on a Friday, masturbate and watch fucking Notting Hill loser women that are big Taylor Swift people, they set out on a quest to destroy someone that they thought talked shit about mother, essentially.

Indirectly. So Chauncey Gardner Johnson is wearing a t-shirt today and it says, Swifties can, and then LIX, which is Super Bowl 59, can licks my balls. Fucking strong, and totally redeem yourself, Chauncey Gardner Johnson. Way to go, partner. I mean, I always had your back, and all these motherfuckers wanted to fight you when you were with the Saints, like when the Bucks were trying to fight you

and the Bears were trying to fight you, and you're getting cheap-shotted, you and Lattimore and everybody getting cheap shotted. I was on your side and now I'm back on your side again. I love it. Swifties can licks my balls. And if you want to see great comments, go look at these people riding in on their little white horses and clutching their pearls. Oh, my God. That's so immature. Real mature. Did you know that my God. What are that? So immature, real mature.

Did you know that many of her listeners are children? You creep. Oh no. Many of her, her listeners are fucking like 20 something and 30 something year old, sad, lonely women. That's who many of her listeners are. People who dress up like her to go to concerts, people who call her mother, people who post videos of them dancing to her shit when they're at home vacuuming. That's who her audience is. They are just people with arrested development. They are children mentally. They are not adults.

They are mental children. They look like adults. They walk around like adults. They go to jobs like adults. They dress like adults sometimes. But they are children mentally. There's an element of arrested development that all of them possess so they're not children they just think they're children and good on you chauncey gardner johnson cj gj swifties can licks my balls he says says

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One per new customer. Bonus award. It is non-withdrawable pick six credits that expire in 14 days. Limited time offer. See terms at picksix.draftkings.com slash promos. Yep, so that parade is just continuing.

I've been watching coverage of it on Zumo. They've got the NBC 10adelphia feed of that parade the parade in houston was fun but it was just kind of like you know jillian you know the story jillian jim got to ride on these clydesdales these budweiser clydesdales that just shows you how lame this setup was is they had a whole like clydesdale wagon that was set up for alumni or like, you know, former Astros. And they couldn't find anybody to ride it. So some guy from Budweiser goes, Josh, do you guys want to get on this? We need somebody to ride on these Clydesdales. I'm like, fuck yeah. So I called my boss and I'm like, listen, they want us to ride on the Clydesdales.

I think we should do it. And he's like, nope, I need you to broadcast live from down there. We need parade coverage. I'm like, who the fuck needs parade coverage on the radio? Like who needs some guy to break down a parade on the radio? Like for the blind, like there's three blind people sitting around like, boy, I sure feel like I'm there now that Josh is describing this fucking world series parade. So I wasn't allowed to go. He said I had to stay back and do the thing, do the broadcast. So just me by myself, Jim and Jilly riding these, the damn Clydesdales living the dream, waving to people. Most people are like, who the fuck are these dopes? Every now and then they'd

get a yell from someone. Oh, Jim, my Jilly. And I'm like, God damn it. God damn. Like if I knew I was going to get fired eventually anyway, I should have just said, fuck it. You know, it's one of those kinds of things in life. Apparently, um, I just remembered that I did this. So after the Eagles won the Superbowl on Sunday and I was, you know, intoxicated, inebriated, whatever, you know, whatever word you choose. I sent an email to the guy that runs 97.5 that I know. I will just read to you the email I sent because he sent me an email back and it was a nice email. But February 9th, what time did I

send this? 1154 p.m. on February 9th. That's well after the Super Bowl was over. This is the email I sent. I know you don't believe it, but I'd kill in Philly after working in a town like St. Louis where it's dull and lacking passion. I know that my type of talk works in Philly. I'm aware I'll never be back on the air there, but I should be. I'd kill. I am these people.

I just didn't realize it when I was there. Hope you're doing well. And I got a response. Hey, hope you're well. Good to hear from you. Well, thanks. Appreciate you, pal. I'm glad that you appreciated getting an email five days ago. I sent you an email at midnight five days ago, Sunday night after the Super Bowl, letting you know that I would kill there. And I would. I would destroy there. I think I'd do very well. But I guess they got a ride with, you know, what they have there in Philadelphia, which is the same boring shit and WIP light and do whatever you got to do, man. But look, I'm a dude looking for a job. I have no qualms with, you know, stroking myself a little bit. Shit, today I saw my radio station in Nashville, which as far as decisions to leave a

place on my own, not getting fired, but to leave, that was the worst decision. Now, granted, I'd only left like two other places, been fired twice, I think I've left twice, whatever, none of that matters. But leaving Nashville was the dumbest thing I've done. And I know I talk about that on the pod a lot, but it really was. And they're doing a Valentine's Day bit, a pearl necklace bit. I mean, haha, pearl necklace to win Pearl Jam tickets. But the bit was they had to rub out this clam to get to the pearl. So what I think that the bit was is they put a clam in ice and you had to rub the ice to melt the ice and then you get to the clam. And if your clam had the pearl in it, you win the Pearl Jam tickets. Funny fucking bit. It's humorous. It's fun. It's, it's, it's kind of, you know, it's sexual innuendo. So if people hear it on the radio,

they're like, Whoa, that's, that's kind of edgy. And it gets people going like, Whoa, at the end of the day is rubbing a clam that big of a deal? No, but it's a funny bit. It's not, hey, go to our app to try to win fucking Tom Petty tribute band tickets. It's not come to our classic blank this, classic car show, classic whatever, everything that says old, old, old. At least this radio station that I worked at was doing bits that like if you're somebody who's you know 20 something years old you might go oh that sounds kind of funny at least it's kind of interesting it's got my attention it's not hey are you 80 this is for you so I'm watching that and I'm just pissed I text the PD and I'm like you know every fucking day

like I want to be clear like when I was doing that there like I didn't hate it but I and I'm like, you know, every fucking day, like, I want to be clear. Like when I was doing that there, like I didn't hate it, but I like, I'm, I fancy myself a talk show host. That's what I like to do. Right? Like I am a long form talker and there wasn't a lot of long form talking in this, but I was doing well with it. I had three ratings books where I was number one out of the five that I was there. And one of them was when I first got there that wasn't. So we did very well. We were doing solid and they wanted me to stay. Like, that's the thing, man. Like when somebody wants you to stay, maybe just fucking stay a fucking dope. There's an idea.

But like, we're doing well. I like the PD a lot. Like he liked me as a younger dude. We're about the same age. So he's doing wacky shit. He top 40 guy. So he's been around. So he knows to do wacky shit.

But instead I was like nope I'm coming to St. fucking Lewis man what a move by me making the decision to go to the old folks home now at the time I didn't know it was the old folks home but it is the old folks home so I'm like shit you know why would you do something like that Josh like and like I know you shouldn't look back and you shouldn't, you know, don't look back in anger. So Sally can wait. She knows it's too late. She's walking away. That's me.

They say don't look back in anger. All I do is look back in anger, whether it be at myself or whether it be at other people. I don't just look back and go, I'm indifferent. Nope. I'm just, I look back and I'm pissed at myself for a lot of the life decisions that I make, you know, and that is one of them. Like, was it a dream job to be a classic rock morning show doofus in Nashville? No, you could argue more dream jobby shit is WIP biggest sports station in the country where you had it by the balls. And you said, no, I just don't really want to do this anymore. And you blew it up. Like,

those are the things you look at and you go, way to go, doofus. But like, the Nashville job was a good job. I was fitting to make like six figures base to just sit around for four hours a day and talk up records. And I was on in Memphis and Detroit and I was doing well. And it's kind of like, why did you do this, Josh? Why did you do this? Now you're looking for another fucking job. And it's like, why Josh? Why you could, these people would have won. Like, and that's the thing that my dad taught me. And I, again, you should listen to your dad unless your dad's like a real, like fucking degenerate, which whatever. But like, if your dad's like you know josh if someone's offering you a job today they'll offer you a job next year and the year after that because they think you're good once you leave the job you have you're never getting that job back and once you

take the job from these other people that job is never available again and it's like i never thought of it that way and then you know now you find yourself in the situation you're in. And so when I see bits like that, I just get angry because I'm like, is it the most special bit ever? No. Is it revolutionary? No. Is it changing the world?

No. But it's at least funny and it would sound good to talk about on the air and it's wacky. That's the guy that let me do the parade down Broad Street for the party bus. It's like at least that was moving the needle and people were talking about us. You know where they talked about us in St. Louis? At Bethesda. What is Bethesda?

Bethesda is a local old folks home. That's who talked about us here. God damn, Josh. And then you watch the Philly parade and you're like, God, like I could have been the dude there. But again, you shouldn't look back in anger. It's almost impossible not to though. When you think about some of the dumb shit you've done. Now, some people have done dumb shit to you. You've done dumb shit to others. It is what it is. But what are you going to do? What are you going do what are you gonna do ah boy anywho um yeah so that's what's going on today they haven't started speaking at this parade yet that's where shit's gonna get wild will jason

kelsey show up dressed as bryce harper dressed as the philly fanatic i don't know we have to see but as it stands right now you've got the most passionate sports city in america in the midst of a huge parade ain't nobody going to work it's dgen city people are going to climb light poles eat horse shit it's going to be a wild wacky time in philadelphia today and uh good for uh cj gardner johnson for wearing the swifties can licks my ball shirt props to you bro that's goat status and we will continue