The Josh Innes Show - JIS Classic: Josh Goes To The Urologist

Episode Date: June 5, 2025

Here is a classic piece of audio from the J&R Show. I went to the urologist and Rich hammers me for freeballing at the appointment. Sports Radio 610 in Houston circa June of 2012. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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Yep. Over at the Skirlock Tower at Methodist. Yep. Saw Dr. Lapin, who's actually a listener of this show? Awesome fan of the Astros very cool knew who I was which really you know that could be a good thing and a bad thing That's true because you know the reality when he's handling your boys. So here's the thing this guy has seen my wiener so That's gonna be with him forever and since he listens to the show

So that's gonna be with him forever. And since he listens to the show, from here on out, every time he listens to the show and he disagrees with something I say- He's not gonna think of your genitals. Every time he thinks of something- You're an idiot. Every time he disagrees with something I say, it'll have nothing to do with the content of what I say. It'll always go back to, what does this guy know?

He's got a small dog. In my mind, that's got a small dog. In my mind that's what's going to happen. The NBA finals are finally here and after spending the playoffs all over the pick six app from DraftKings. Well, we're ready for the championship round and this is your last shot to win some real cash before the season ends. The simplest way to get in on the action is downloading the Pick 6 app from DraftKings and it's super simple. Just pick more or less on the stats for two or more of your favorite players and boom, you're in the mix for big cash prizes. Now your picks and you're heating up. Pick 6 brings upside with payouts up to 500 times. Are you ready

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What are you doing? These are the biggest deals of the season. I'm shouting it from the rooftop. We have a radio ad. You don't need to be up there. The Summer Big Red Sale is on from June 5th to June 12th. Conditions apply. Details online. See, once you've seen a guy's package and you know that it's not very impressive, they can have the greatest argument ever, but if you disagree with them,

it's gonna go back to the, oh, well, yeah, well, you're fat type thing. So I know that if Dr. Lapin drives around his fancy car He's a doctor I'm assuming his car is fancy as he's driving down the highway listening to this and if I say, you know What the Astros suck and that might get him all worked up, you know, he's gonna say what does this guy know? He's got you do that like a mouse. He may tell you you have Well, I'm not gonna go there. He may tell you you're very sick, I'm not even going to go there. He may tell you you're very sick, and you're not. He could mess with you, you know. He could. But I saw Dr. Lapin today, and I had to go through the whole process of, you know,

dropping your pants, and he's got to go down there, and he's got to feel. Yes. Good news is that he did not feel anything abnormal down there, except for the fact that I basically have a vagina. My dong's so small. But outside of that, he did not feel anything abnormal. Now he says- I'm getting very uncomfortable with this conversation. Now, he said there's no cancer or anything down there. None of those serious issues like twisted ball or anything like that. Said that- Well, then what the hell's the problem? You've been in like serious. I have. Um, he said that it might be like

somewhat inflamed. If that makes any sense, I just might. I might have like hit it on something and it's kind of a residual effect of that. Hit it on something. And he also said this. Hit it on something. Now he also said this because I'm thinking you'd remember

that. Well, I don't I didn't get like kicked I'm thinking you'd remember that. Well I didn't get like kicked by a horse or anything like that but maybe like I sat on it. Here's a little, little, little, pulling the curtain back here. I, sometimes I don't wear underwear. And whether or not I wear underwear determines on whether or not I go to the store and buy a new pack of underwear. Yeah, I figured that. Because I don't, you know, like I like to put, I wear new underwear. I don't like to wash it and all that. So here come the urologist jokes. Most of my, uh, you know, most of my underwear is new when I buy it, you know, I mean, just, you know, I get it. So I just got lazy and didn't go to the store

for a couple of weeks. So I was, you know, as, as they call it free balling, as the kids are calling it. No, I don't think they call it that. I think they do. I don't. They do or go in commando. That I I've heard you've never heard free ball No, well, then you need to get out a little bit more and then the little circles you run in Maybe you and the gooch or whatever your friend. What's your friend's name? I have no idea what you're talking about with all the time. I can't help you at all. Who's your friend? I don't know anyone named gooch. I know I just try to remember his name. It's some name like like like like patches What's the guy's name? It's not Patches. I don't remember the guy's damn name.

It's the buddy you go out and get hammered with. I have no idea what you're talking about. Well, for the sake of this argument, since you won't tell me his name, we're going to call him Scooter. So here's the deal. When you're circles, you guys need to know the slang a little bit better. But anyway, so the doctor says nothing's really wrong. So he so he said here's what you need to do stop free balling, right? He didn't say he well He didn't say it like that. He went more doctor with yeah, and he's like, maybe you need some more support Maybe wear some breeze. I said I'm all in at the doctor's office. You're an idiot Who goes to the urologist not wearing underwear? me

But oh my god, I'm wearing like basketball shorts, that's like not taking a shower before a massage I disagree that's flat out rude. That's not rude. Yeah, it is That's that's totally if you if you get undressed for a massage therapist, and you're sweaty, that's as rude as it gets. But here's the thing, Rich. First of all, this was at 9.30 in the morning, right? I woke up, took a shower, put on my basketball shorts like I normally do if I'm not, you know, and I went. Now, rude would have been like not taking a shower and then like deliberately rubbing

like onions on my balls just so things would be tough for me. That would have been ruder. There's nothing rude about this. But he said, listen, you don't have cancer. I don't feel anything abnormal. We're just going to give you this prescription. And in two weeks, you tell me how things feel, if you get any better.

Right. And by the way, free balling is not good. I've learned this now. Free balling long term will not be, there's not a good ending there. Really? For the free ballers out there. How do you know this?

I've heard. And I'm not the only person that does this every time we get into one of these arguments It's almost like I'm on an island here and you like you assume that nobody else does this right? Oh, I a lot of people free ball right you wind up looking like the charm the chimes on a grandfather clock Okay, I think you know where I'm going there and And of course, like I said, the urologist's jokes are pouring in on the text message page. Urologists don't schedule appointments. They consider it a date. Very nice. Very nice. But I am convinced, though, that any time this guy disagrees with me, he's just going to always have that like as a reserve. Like in chamber he's gonna be like this guy doesn't know anything

small wiener trust me you talk a big game like you're some big balls guy I've seen you and I know you're not but he was a great guy and then on Wednesday I'm convinced I'm a hypochondriac you may need a second opinion really well I don't know I mean isn't that what they always advise in situations like this were you concerned about your health to always get a second opinion? Well, here's what I'm gonna do. Actually, I'm gonna go see Dr. Munz on Wednesday. All right. Gonna go see Dr. Munz just to get kind of a physical,

because this whole thing I have been feeling pretty sick, and you know I've been dealing with fatigue for a long time, and I don't know why, I'm just always fatigued. Ask Dr. Munz's opinion or free-balling. I will. I'm guessing he's anti-free-balling. So Dr. Munz, it's 730 ining? I will. I'm guessing he's anti-free-balling. So, Dr. Munz, it's 7.30 in the morning on Wednesday. I'm going to walk in. First thing I'm going to say is, hey, Doc, Josh Yannis, good to meet you.

Thanks for seeing me on such short notice. I appreciate it. Free-balling thoughts. That's so stupid. Yeah, well, I've done it. That's so stupid. Yeah, well, I've done it. And I do it all the time and I probably will continue. But I did go get some underwear today first, but on this occasion, because I want to see

if wearing underwear will keep me from having ball pains. Rich, it's like not flossing and brushing before you see the dentist. Josh, you are just nasty, dude. How? How is this nasty? There is in no way comparable to that. What you guys are saying is so far off base. There is nothing comparable to not brushing your teeth, which is just common. Whether you go into the dentist or not, you're brushing your teeth. How is it? I made it a special case when I got up today and I took a shower, I got the body lotion out and I rubbed it all down there. I made sure it was clean and

pleasant for the guy. How is free balling somehow akin to not brushing before you go to the dentist? There is a text message suggesting you can reduce your pain down there by using smaller tampons. Screw you. Go to hell. Alright, so if you want, now I'm curious about this. I'm curious to know the opinions of people here. Because that text now, I'm not, that's why I don't read them, but you brought it up, that's saying that somehow free balling before you go to the Urologist is somehow akin to not brushing your teeth. I

Don't understand how this is even remotely close to the same thing. It's not the same ballpark. It's not the same league It's not the same sport now if I wouldn't have showered I think that's rude right Oh no doubt if you don't shower before you go to the urologist And you've got a doctor fondling your sack and that's rude yeah that's rude or if a lady goes to the lady doctor and she's on the stirrup yes we get it we get it it's like pepe le pew right i mean you gotta clean we get it i'm interested to know what the people think 713-572-4610

and eliminate the fact that your OB-GYN should not need a fly swatter exactly okay please eliminate the fact that this is me and your OB-GYN should not need a fly swatter. Exactly. Okay. Please eliminate the fact that this is me, and I know that most of you don't like me anyway. I think we're both getting thrown off the air after this segment. I want you to assume that I'm just a guy that everybody likes, and I'm not me who everybody hates. Just I'm a normal guy.

Alright, so fantasy land. Fantasy land here. Tell me how it is somehow akin to not brushing your teeth before going to the dentist if you're free balling when you go to the urologist. I don't get that. Well, I mean, you're certainly leaving yourself open to more germs if you're free balling, right? I guess. I guess. We don't know what's in your underwear. That's what we don't know. What if you're wearing dirty underpants? We don't know. You realize how much you're setting me up right now and how tough it is for me to not

say something really juvenile. Which is really tough for you. You wouldn't have done that when Charlie was here. You wouldn't even have had them thoughts. Oh yeah, yeah, that's true. You would not have even thought about making ball jokes. Oh believe me, I don't think we would have been having this conversation. I hate to keep banging a dead horse. Alright, alright! I advise though, if you're gonna bang a dead horse, don't free ball. Idiots. Light them up. 713-572-4610 because I'm curious to know what Houstonians think. Is it somehow rude to free ball before going to the urologist?

I don't think so. I didn't even think of that. That didn't even dawn on me today. And maybe that says something about me. Yes, I think it does. Alright, light them up. It's JNR, stay there.