The Josh Innes Show - Megan Thee Stallion Swimwear at Walmart.

Episode Date: May 16, 2025

I just read a story about Megan Thee Stallion dropping a line of swimwear at Walmart. First off, Megan is fine AF. Second, no one that looks like Megan Thee Stallion is going to be wearing these Walmart bathing suits. This leads me down a path of body positivity. I'm also tickled by the inclusive signage at stores like Target. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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The PC Insiders World Elite MasterCard, the card for living unlimited. Conditions apply to all benefits. Visit pcfinancial.ca for details. All right friends, what's going on? Let's see here, let's read a headline here and see what's going on? Let's see here. Let's read a headline here and see what's cooking Megan thee stallion launches new hot girl swimmer swimwear hot girl summer swimwear at

Walmart now I am a big fan of Megan the stallion Megan thee stallion now not musically couple of the songs are fine most of them are pretty Graphic and I'm not trying to be a prude but they are quite graphic is what I would call them. Is that a fair way of describing Megan Thee Stallion's music? Graphic. Ah! Badi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yada yada crazy reggie big titties little ways yada yada yada yada and I find her to be super sexy ah it's hot girl summer so she's selling her swimwear at Walmart and I'm looking at a an Instagram post hot girl swim by

Megan thee stallion available May 19th and I'm looking at the picture these tight-ass chicks wearing these very small bikion, available May 19th. And I'm looking at the picture of these tight-ass chicks wearing these very small bikinis. And I'm like, ma'am, I'm telling you who is not going to Walmart to buy those Megan Thee Stallion swimwear bikinis, people who look like you and your friends in this picture. Like if we were doing truth and advertising,

which we're getting a lot of now, by the way, like you walk into Walmart, it's crazy like how they're trying to cover every single base. Target're trying to cover every single base. Target particularly tries to cover every single base. Like, so you'll walk into a Walmart and you'll see the, or really Target. Come to think of it, at Walmart they don't really use a lot of pictures, right? But in Target they show a bunch of pictures of people wearing the stuff. So like you'll walk in and they'll be like somebody with half an arm.

And you're like, oh so that's good, so this shirt looks good on someone who's missing half of their left arm that's great and then you'll walk down a little bit more and it'll be like a really heavy set well there'll be a frumpy chick maybe not a super morbidly obese but a frumpy chick that's got the kind of jeans that go up past her belly button and then you'll walk down a little bit more and there'll be someone who's like like got like a skin like a complexion that's like splotchy or like really freckly and you're like oh that's good so that shirt really does pop on someone that's got a splotchy kind of I don't know freckly face then you work your way over to the men's section and there'll be a dude in a wheelchair and you're like let me tell you something their line of hoodies looks great on dudes in wheelchairs, right? And then like, then you'll go over here,

then there's a baby with Down syndrome. They're like covering all of their bases. Target's like, you're not going to call us? Fucking offensive, are you? I'm sure someone could though. They're like, well, why isn't the baby with Down syndrome black? Ha! I want an Asian Down syndrome baby showing what that jumper looks like, or romper, or whatever the hell it is that babies wear. Ha! But boy, get ready for a not-so-hot-girl summer as there are going to be some some real heifers walking around thinking they're Megan the Stallion. As we've talked about, I'm very envious of some women's ability to be very confident.

I don't know if they're actually confident or if it's like a front they put up, but they're fucking great at it. Let me play a couple commercials and we'll continue. This is it, the day you finally ask for that big promotion. You're in front of your mirror with your Starbucks coffee. Be confident. Assertive. Remember eye contact. But also, remember to blink.

Smile. But not too much. That's weird. What if you aren't any good at your job? What if they demote you instead? Okay. Don't be silly. You're smart.

You're driven. You're gonna be late if you keep talking to the mirror. This promotion is yours. Go get them. Starbucks. It's never just coffee. Because there are certainly people who like either have a real confidence like you know, Rasputia Lattimore in in Norbit's wife. Is that her name? Rasputia? Like that kind of confident like like you know, they're unappealing. There's

nothing about them that looks good, they're like giant bingo wings and like they don't look good at all, yet they've got this really like strong confidence about themselves. Like I know I'm fine, like just like the character in Norbit, like you get people like that and you're like do you really believe that or is this a defense mechanism? That's my question for you. Are you really confident, like if I broke you down, if I Sigmund Freuded you right now, would you actually be confident or is this just a front that you're putting up because you're trying to deflect off of the fact that you know you just don't look good and you look like a you know a giant blob, you know,

you look like Jabba the Hutt, right? And I say that as someone who's not appealing and I'm aware I'm not appealing and I'm feeling really guys if I can be honest with you I'm feeling very unappealing lately because I haven't had my manjaro in like two months and and I'm sad about it because I just they were they were right if you stop taking the manjaro you can do all the same shit you were doing but then all of a sudden like it like overnight you're going to go from feeling They were right. If you stop taking the manjarro, you can do all the same shit you were doing, but then all of a sudden, like overnight you're going to go from feeling really good about yourself and feel like you don't really feel sick, like I didn't feel sick when I was taking it, all of a sudden now you eat like one granola bar and you've gained 400 pounds. In the two

months since I took my last manjarro, I don't want to get on a scale, but I feel like I've probably gained 25 pounds. And not just that, but like if get on a scale but I feel like I've probably gained 25 pounds and not just that but like if you go back to what I looked like around this time last year like when me and Jilly went to Big friend of the show by the way that you all know Alexandria Palladino. She got married in Chicago Last July so Luther had already died. This is before I got fired. So this was like July 20th or something like that Sorry, I don't remember your wedding date, Ali. But I went and I went to the wedding and went to the rehearsal dinner the night before. Do you see pictures of me? I'm looking fucking svelte, beard's looking good, hair's looking tight. I'm sad that my dog is dead, but I'm looking good.

I'm looking good. I dressed fairly nice for the reception. I don't remember what exactly I looked like but I looked decent enough and that was good. Fast forward you know 10 months later out of work for nine months and no manjaro for about the last two or three months and now I'm just disgusting. So I feel like I'm allowed to talk about this kind of shit because I myself feel disgusting and terrible and I would not want people to see me looking terrible. Like if I'm wearing a shirt that's even slightly short where if I lean back a little bit my gut hangs out over my belt line, not doing it. There are some people who just have given up and do not give a fuck. I see a

lot of dudes particularly in this part of the country, that'll wear like cutoff shirts, not tank tops, but shirts that they cut the sleeves off of that usually have like a motorcycle or an American flag somewhere on them or an eagle or a combination of the three on this shirt and like their gut will just be drooping down hanging out of the shirt. And I'm like, look, I'm not going to judge you for being fat. I'm fat. It is what it is. But do the best you can to not look fat in front of other people. Do the best you can. Like one

thing you could say about this jelly roll, and I don't know if you know he's lost like 100, something, 200 pounds, whatever, but there was never a point when jelly roll was this gigantic lard of a man weighing like 400 pounds or whatever he weighed. There was never a point where his gut hung out of his shirt when he was in public. Now part of that is probably because he was wearing like a nine extra large tall shirt, which is fine. But like there are dudes that just let their guts hang the fuck out and I feel horrible about myself. There are days that I will put on seven, eight, nine different shirts and if I'm looking at it

and I'm in a mood that day and I'm looking in the mirror looking at it, I'm like, Josh, what the fuck are you doing? So then I put on a bigger shirt, but then I'm like, Josh, the bigger shirt looks even worse. It makes you look even fatter because you look like you're wearing a tent and it just fucking sucks. And you might say, well, Josh, go exercise. Bitch, I walk like 25,000 steps a day with my dog. Well, Josh, do a better workout.

I don't want to. I was quite content in my life knowing I could take my Menjar when my A1C was lower and I wasn't really hungry and life was good. Well, Josh, what if that shit kills you? Good, knock it out. At least I'll go down looking better than I would if I were a giant fucking blob

with a bunch of fucking skin tags and a gut hanging down to my dick and my dick not even visible. I miss my Manjaro. So anyway back to the ladies that will be wearing this swimsuit. This is misleading because the pictures of these tight chicks, particularly Megan Thee Stallion, who I think is so fucking hot. I don't know why I think she's so hot, because I think everything she says is really gross. But like, I think she's hot.

I'm not judging the music. I'm not sitting here telling you it's terrible music. It's just not for me. Some of it, I say that, but some of it is. Some of the shit's pretty good. Little taste of the sweetest pie, whatever the fuck. The, what's the, the, the, the WAP? I didn't like WAP.

I thought that was a, it didn't leave much to the imagination. It's like, you know, like I'm not offended by shit, but I think you need to leave a little to the imagination. It's the same way I feel about like, you know, bikinis and shit. Like if some chick walks around in a thong, that's not attractive. Some chick walks around in a boy short bathing suit, you're like, ah, that leaves a little bit to the imagination. And now it gives me something to think

about when I turn myself over to Lowe's and a little you know garage outside of Lowe's with my Vaseline and my phone that will give me something to think about and that's good but if you're basically wearing nothing you're giving me nothing to think about therefore I'm like yeah this is probably not I don't like this so so what I'm hearing songs unedited where we just hear wet-ass pussy non-stop and all the shit I'm hearing songs unedited where we just hear wet ass pussy non-stop and all the shit I'm like ma'am I think you're classier than that. I think you're a classier broad than that and I would like to hear I want to hear you sing like Unbreak My Heart that's what

I want to hear from you. I want some Tony Braxton shit out of you that's what I want that's what I'm here for. I want some SWV action out of you ma'am. I want you just to sing me some song that's not about your fucking vagina or getting fucked in the ass or whatever it is. Give me something like that. Like it's okay to be a little classy. You've already gotten famous. You're famous for doing whatever, like all this horace shit. Go out and do something classy. But I'm not judging you. Like it's a hard thing because you just tell some chick to

stop being horace, then you're like slut shaming. If you tell someone to do something classy, you're saying, oh, I'm not classy. Like it's a lose-lose. But I find her to be super sexy. And I'm looking at this picture right now of this Megan Thee Stallion bathing suit line, and I'm looking at the three bathing suits that I'm looking at. And one of them is like sort of a one piece, but the entire side of it is basically a string bikini. And I'm like, ma'am, the women that are gonna go to Walmart and buy that bathing suit will not look good in that bathing suit. That is going to look terrible. I mean it's going to look like like when

you used to get those little things that you could squeeze and like Play-Doh would come out of the sides and shit of it. Like that's what that's going to look like ma'am. Like this woman that you put in here is the tightest,niest chick you could put in a bathing suit that looks like that what really I would argue that Megan the stallion is committing really a social crime by doing this like the people that are going to wear that are going to look like Lizzo before Lizzo thought she got hot like that's what we're going to be seeing is she's to be just like oozing out of the side of this bathing suit. Like ma'am, bad call. Like I'd rather see these chicks in a bikini. Like that's going to be bad news bears. Real bad news for anybody that's going to wear those, but whatever. And also, people like to shit on Ozempic because they judge people who lose weight by Ozempic. I was watching the Kelly Clarkson show the other day or a highlight of the Kelly Clarkson show. It's the one where the kid from the Love on the Spectrum hugs Jack Black.

He's going, Miss Kelly, Miss Kelly, thank you, Miss Kelly, and oh, Jack Black. And then if you watch that clip, it always looks like he's on the verge of kissing Jack Black and Jack doesn't know what to really do. Like there are times they almost lean in. It's kind of strange. But like you look at Kelly Clarkson, who's lost all this weight because of the Ozempic or the Manjaro or whatever. And I'm like, man, you look at Kelly Clarkson who's lost all this weight because of the Ozempic or the Manjaro or whatever and I'm like, man, you look about as good as you did. Like this the best you've looked

since like since you've been gone at the VMAs in like 2007 or whatever that was, which was super hot apex of Kelly Clarkson hotness wearing like Capri pants and a tank top and shit and you look great. This the best you've looked since then. Like, so what's so bad about Osempic? But then you look at like, we talked about this the other day, the Meghan Trainor, and Meghan Trainor's whole image was built on, hey, I'm kind of fat and here are my fat friends,

but it doesn't matter because my mom says boys like fat girls. And now she's like, I've lost all this fucking weight and I look nothing like I've described in the song. And now, but it's okay that you're still fat, but I didn't want to be fat anymore. I've lost all this fucking weight and I look nothing like I've described in the song and now but it's okay that you're still fat but I didn't want to be fat anymore I was very confident I was body positive but instead I went out and took some fucking manjaros some ozempic her face now she has ozempic face ozempic face is another thing that people

talk about where all these celebrities lose all this weight and it looks like their faces are fucking melting like they're a candlestick. Some of that's real. Some that is real. Her face does not look good. She does not have a good looking Manjaro face or an ozempic face. Whereas my dad who takes the Manjaro, my dad looks really good for a 58-ish year old dude. 58, my dad is 58, he's about to be 58. So like my dad's like a 58 year old dude, has lost a bunch of weight with Manjaro, but looks good, his face looks good.

He looks good. Some people look great doing it. I thought I was looking pretty fucking good. Now I'm not. And I know you have your own problems. I respect that you have your own problems. Boy, the people that are gonna walk into Walmart and buy these bathing suits,

then they're gonna walk around and they're gonna think they look hot as fuck. They're like it's hot girl summer y'all. Well ma'am, it might be if you're Megan Thee Stallion and her friends in this picture who are very shapely and they look very good. Boy Megan Thee Stallion's so hot. Is that her? Do I want to go look at, I think I want to go look at Megan Thee Stallion's Instagram now. Talk amongst yourselves. So I feel pretty confident that we'll get a lot of skanky shit.

But every now and then Megan Thee Stallion will post something that's kinda classy and you're like, see look, you're beautiful. Let's see here. Where you at Megan? See I like, you know who else I still think is kinda hot? Is Nicki Minaj. I think Nicki Minaj is kinda hot. Ass is very large, obv, but like I'm here. I'm here

for Megan Lee Stallion. There was the one song of hers and one video of hers that was super hot that she looked just fantastic and I don't remember what it was, but I do. I love her and if I like, oh what about when she threw out the first pitch at that Astros game and was all white jeans, all white belt, all white top body looking like milk? I'm like, God damn woman. She had like the the the white I think it was a white Astros jersey. I forgot what color the Astros jersey

was because she had the white pants on and shit. And I'm like, God damn body. Adi Adi Adi Adi yada yada body yada yada yada yada yada Crazy curvy something something big titties little waist. I Feel bad that I don't remember. Okay. Let me do this really quick And this wasn't even my intention to talk about this for a whole pod, but now I'm locked in on it body Megan the stallion Let's see Megan the stand. let's see Megan the stand let me see the lyrics let's

see body yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi body yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi body yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi body yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi yadi body crazy curvy wavy big titties little waist yeah body yada yada yada yada yada yada ma. Nah. So now you guys are know if you didn't know it's a good jam. I enjoy it, but it's body crazy curvy wavy big titties little waist. Nah.

Body yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada y Adi Adi Adi you guys can go back and count if that was 13 or not. I'm not sure but I think it was Boy I like it. I'm a big Megan the stallion guy. Anywho, who's that guy that was it? Who's the guy that shot Megan the stallion? Who's it? Who am I thinking of? Who's the dude that like shot Megan the stay is that Tory Lane's is that who I'm thinking of here? Tory Lane's what did do, dude? Did you did you shoot Megan Thee Stallion? Like didn't someone, Tori Lanes, did he shoot Megan Thee Stallion in the foot? Is that what happened? Is that what's going on right now? Tori Lanes hospitalized after prison stabbing. Well take that, motherfucker! That's what happens when you shoot Megan Thee Stallion in the foot. Yaddy yaddy yaddy yaddy yaddy yaddy yaddy yaddy yaddy yaddy yaddy yaddy yaddy yaddy

crazy curvy body wavy big titties little waist yaddy yaddy yaddy yaddy yaddy yaddy yaddy. Alright, the good news is though Tory Lanez has seen his condition stabilized after he was stabbed in prison. So he was stabbed. But Tory Lane's. Will live. He will live. You know we make fun of rap and go boy. There's some fucked up shit that happened. Trust me,

you go back and listen to like 70s country singers and shit. Holy shit. They had some stuff go down in their lives, man. Who's my guy? Johnny paycheck. Just go look up all the shit that happened in Johnny Paychex. Just go look up all the shit that happened in Johnny Paycheck's life. Go look up all the shit that happened with George Jones and Tammy Wynette. Fucking George Jones drove to a liquor store in a lawnmower because his wife took his fucking keys because he was a drunk. I like him. Man of my own heart. I dig that. But like these country dudes, a bunch of fucked up shit happened. Like we just stare at rat people and we're

like, look at this trash. Dude, go back and look at some of the shit that happened like with these outlaw country dudes in the fucking 70s with their ladies. Holy shit. Dude, we've talked about it. Johnny Paycheck killed a dude. Literally killed a motherfucker. Like this is fucking, it's wild, man.

It's wild. Don't forget that. Body crazy curvy wavy big titties little waist body yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada yada y