The Josh Innes Show - Thanksgiving Football

Episode Date: May 14, 2025

First off, I have an issue with these giant trucks that drop loose gravel all over the highway. What gives these people the right? Second, The NFL schedule will be revealed tonight. USA Today has another dreadful headline regarding the schedule. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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groceries that over deliver. You know who I really despise are the people that drive these big you know dump truck type of vehicles on the highway that carry loose gravel and debris and shit that could fall out of the truck and then hit other cars? But they all have that sign on the back of the truck that says, stay back 200 feet, I'm not responsible for any damage. Why aren't you responsible for any damage? Why isn't your company responsible for any damage. Why aren't you responsible for any damage? Why isn't your company responsible for any damage? Unless you're doing some sort of state work in some way or working for the city or the state, if you're just hauling gravel to some site or something, why the hell can you just drop all this loose gravel on the highway and have rocks bounce up and hit my windshield and you're not responsible for it. Why can't that just go for everything like oops the guy on

the motorcycle shouldn't have been in that lane. My bad I had a sign on my car. I had a sign on my car that said if I hit a guy on a motorcycle it's actually the motorcycle guy's fault or like oops I rear-ended you but it's your fault. I had a sign on my car that says I can rear-end you and it would be totally fine. I don't understand this maybe Maybe I'm stupid and that's quite possible that I'm stupid on this but it doesn't change the fact that I find it asinine that these people can drive these trucks. They don't have to make sure all of the debris that is in the back of these trucks is like like battened down

and can't come out. All they have to do is put a sign on the back of the truck that says they're not responsible for any damage. Does that apply to everybody? That is my question. Can I just put a random sign on the back of my car that says I'm not responsible for anything and then just be as reckless and boneheaded as I'd like to? Like back in the day I used to have a lot of empty cans in the back of my truck, like beer cans, soda cans, whatever. Like you'd be out drinking, You just throw a bunch of beer cans back there, right? Then you'd be driving down the road, and like you'd start seeing beer cans just like,

like going up like Dorothy in Twister, like all those little balls in Twister that are going up. That's what all these little soda cans and mostly beer cans look like. They'd fly up and you'd be like, shit, are they gonna fly out and hit a car? Well, if I put a sign on the back of the truck that says, hey, I'm a degenerate drunk that leaves beer cans in the bed of this truck, if they happen to fly out

and hit your window, that's on you because you didn't stay back 200 feet. Sorry, if you stay back 200 feet. Now, what happens if I do stay back 200 feet? If I can prove that I was 200 feet behind you and then the rock still hits me. Can I say well friend news flash I was 200 feet behind you. I can prove I was 200 feet behind you because I have a range finder and I had it in my car because I play golf and I have a range finder and it says that I am 200 feet from you. I'm actually 201 and a half feet from you yet I still got hit by one of your pebbles. Is it now your fault you jack wagon? Can I do that? Is that

how that works? I'm not positive but it should. It's just weird to me. It's weird to me that these people who seemingly have zero authority in anything other than they're just in a truck that's bigger than yours and they are you know like they're just like there's special rules for people hauling gravel. Like where is this gravel going? Like I'm guarantee you're not going to do top secret government work with this gravel. You're just going to a lot somewhere where there's gravel. Anywho, let's play some commercials and we'll continue. Let's see here. Let's take a look at what's going on

in the headlines today. Headline reads, hold on, let me get it for you. Headline reads, we have the Thanksgiving Day football schedule. NFL announces Thanksgiving Day football schedule, highlighted by the Cowboys versus Chiefs. Well, that should be fun, although by Thanksgiving, the Cowboys are probably going to be with probably their third starting quarterback and are going to be out of contention. But in it just enough where

it's like, hey, if the Cowboys rattle off a couple in a row and things happen, they might sneak into the wild card. Apparently, the Chiefs are having to play on every holiday this year. They're playing on Christmas. They're playing on Thanksgiving. But such is the perils or such are the perils of being the dominant franchise in the sport. That's how it goes. It's Pat Mahomes. It's really it's Taylor Swift for being fair. That's the only reason that Travis Kelsey's even playing football still is

because the league probably went to him and was like, listen, Taylor is very good for business and if you stop playing all those little tweens and **** that love Taylor Swift and aren't interested in football, they're going to stop watching and yes we'll be fine we will survive without them but it would be nice if on Christmas Day and Thanksgiving we have like billions of people watching because they want to see Taylor at a Thanksgiving Day or Christmas Day game. So stay in the league as long as you can. We do not care that you're not productive anymore. We do not care that you are a no-show in the can. We do not care that you're not productive anymore. We do not care that you were in no show in the playoffs.

We do not care that you look totally uninterested and were allegedly sick in the Super Bowl or whatever the hell it was. We need Taylor. So we're going to plop you in on Christmas and Thanksgiving. And I hear people say like, boy, it must suck to be an athlete and have to play on Christmas and Thanksgiving. Well, tough shit. That's the way the game goes.

I'd actually think it'd be better. It gives you less responsibility. Like at some point in life, you're not going to play football anymore and you're going to have nothing but Thanksgivings and Christmases to sit around and wish you could still play football. So who gives a shit if you're playing football on Thanksgiving? As opposed to the day after, the day before, or whatever. If you play on Thanksgiving, that means you're getting like 10 days off. That means if you play early enough on Thanksgiving, like if you're the Lions who play at you know 1130 Central every year, you're at home

by 5 o'clock playing, now again that's in the East, so it's 1230, so by 6 o'clock or whatever you're at home having Thanksgiving dinner watching planes, trains, and automobiles, so your life doesn't suck. And if you play on Thanksgiving night and you happen to be at a home game, you could probably have Thanksgiving lunch with your family and then go to the ball game. Probably. So let's stop whining about how athletes like, oh God, it must be tough to have to play on Christmas. Who gives a shit? It's Christmas.

It's a made up holiday anyway where people give presents to each other. You can give presents to each other the day after Christmas or the day before Christmas. Who gives a shit? Oh, but Josh, they have kids. Well, their kids at an early age should learn to appreciate the fact that dad is an NFL football player and even at the lowest rung is still making a lot of money that keeps you in a nice house and he's the reason why you get actual good shit for Christmas even if it happens to be the day before or the day after Christmas as opposed to some guy who works at a fucking restaurant whose kids got a Barbie on

fucking layaway, your dad over here is like, hey guess what, I make a couple mill a year playing for the the Cowboys, guess what, you'll get your fucking Christmas present on the day after the day before, how about that, Christmas Eve, we celebrate Christmas on Christmas Eve you little shits, but what about Santa? Guess what kids, daddy is Santa. That's what they should tell them. You got to get these kids growing up. The whole world is trying to get your kids to grow up and you know tell them about how like they're awful because of their race or they're great

because of their race or they're awful because of their sexuality or they're great because of their sexuality. If we're going to have them grow up, let's just go full in and say guess what? You get nice Christmas presents because daddy plays in the fucking NFL and it ain't Santa Claus, it's daddy that's making that happen. That was kind of like how my life was and maybe I'm just fucked up but like I always kind of understood why certain things weren't going to happen in my house and it was because my dad like had these aspirations

of being a big celebrity and like I kind of understood it. I don't know if that's fucked up. I don't know if that's weird. I don't know if that's weird I don't know if you're like geez what kind of kid kind of gets that but like if dad wouldn't be in a baseball game I'd get it I'd be like dad's on the radio and he's a big local celebrity and he's doing whatever or whomever and like that's I got it I understood it and I understood it at a very early age like I've told you guys this before like if I wasn't playing in a game, I'd almost feel bad if my dad came to the game.

So I'd be like, my dad could be doing something. My dad is someone that if you can get any of his time, you're very lucky. Because even when you've got his time, you don't have his time. But in the days before cell phones and shit, he had to come to a sporting event of mine, I had to make sure that I was gonna play

in that sporting event, or I felt bad that he'd come like like Josh got a basketball game today. I do but it's in high school and there's like 13 black guys. I can't jump over a sheet of paper. The odds are I'm not going to play and he would ask me like you're going to play like no I'm not like I'll play in the JV game. The JV games at four o'clock while you're at work. So there's no sense in you coming. Everything will be fine. I'll let you know if some miracle happened and I

got in the other game cool for up by 30 and the other teams fouling too hard and they want to get our guys out before they get hurt. I get to go in there and maybe be the guy that might get hurt on their behalf like in their stead, but I never wanted to make my dad do that. This is a random discussion. I understand this, but like you hear people all the time talking about like, I hear people talk about Christmas and holidays all the time. Like, like it's just

terrible when people are made to work on a holiday. Why? It's just another day. Like you wake up Christmas morning, you open some presents by 830. What do you do next? What is there to do? You sit around, you pull pud, you do nothing. Same with Thanksgiving. What is there to do next? Nothing., you pull pud, you do nothing. Same with Thanksgiving. What is there to do next? Nothing. Like I understand some people have big families and you go visit multiple houses for Christmas and Thanksgiving and that's cool. But ultimately, like by

noon, at the latest, people are like, what the fuck do we do? Like I've opened up all the presents, I've played with the presents. Now what? That's why movies open up on Christmas Day. Like, like, I don't know. I've never been someone who views holidays as something special. Maybe if I get, you know, as I get older, I say, if I get older, if I age at any point, maybe I'll start to appreciate those things a little bit more. Or if I ever have a kid, God forbid, maybe I'd appreciate those things a

little bit more. I just don't. Like if you say, Josh, you need to go to work on Christmas, I'll be like, fuck it, I'll go to work on Christmas. I don't care. Holidays don't. Like if you say, Josh, you need to go to work on Christmas, I'll be like, fuck it, I'll go to work on Christmas. I don't care. Holidays don't mean anything. Like, and maybe it's a generational thing. I don't know. You know, when I got to Houston, one of the first times I was on the air, one of my first big things I did there, I say big thing, it was a nothing thing. But I had been there for a

couple of weeks and I needed someone to do, I think it was like afternoons on Thanksgiving Day. And it was like six hours and I'm like, I'll do it. I can't say no. I've been here three weeks. So I sat there for about six hours on Thanksgiving trying to find anything to **** talk about. I'd be curious to see what that sounded like. No, it doesn't exist anywhere, but I'd be curious to see what that sounds like. I was playing like old interviews of shows from earlier in the week. I was trying to find anything to fill six hours. Probably spent an hour talking

about planes, trains, and automobiles if I had to guess. Also, so back to the schedule. So the NFL Thanksgiving schedule is out. So we know that the Cowboys and Chiefs are going to play. Let's see who the Lions are going to play. They always play the first game. So Chiefs and Cowboys and then here we go. Here's the NFL Thanksgiving schedule. Below is a look at who drew into NFL's Thanksgiving Day triple header for 2025. The full Thanksgiving schedule will be released on Wednesday, May 14th. So does this not have the games even though the headline said read the schedule? Oh here's the first game of the day at 12 30 east at Ford Field. Lions versus to be determined. That's exciting shit right there. Thank you USA Today for the headline that led me to believe that when I click on this story I'm going to get the actual schedule. No I get to see who the chiefs

are playing and I get to know that the Lions who play in this fucking game every year are playing in the same fucking game they're playing in that they play in every year. Then the Cowboys and Chiefs at 430 East. Boy, and here's a real winner. Unless there's something I've missed. I'm just going by USA Today here, so maybe something is out that I haven't seen. This is, even if there is something else out there, USA Today is a winner in my book. So mind you, the headline said, let's take a look at the Thanksgiving Day schedule for the NFL. The only game they have is the Cowboys and Chiefs, and we know the Cowboys play at the same time every year. They have the Lions versus 2B Determined, and we know that the Lions play

in the same spot every year. And then there's that open game at the end of the night, which is great. Look, I think that's wonderful. I'll take like Christmas. I'll take a double header on Christmas. I'll take a triple header on Thanksgiving. Give me all the football every fucking day of the week. I'm an addict. I love to bet on it. I love to watch it. I love football. Every other sport I could do without. If you said there's no basketball on Christmas Day, I'd be like, I don't give a shit. Doesn't bother me. But

here we go. This is a real winner though. 820 Eastern Time on Thanksgiving night. It's a battle of to be determined versus to be determined. Woo! What a day. What a day we've got for you here on USA Today. Now again, maybe this story is out there somewhere. Like let me look at ESPN. Do they have the Thanksgiving? Okay, so their headline says, Let's Feast Cowboys Host Chiefs on Thanksgiving. And let's see, the CBS announced Wednesday morning that the Cowboys will face the

Chiefs on November 27th, blah, blah, blah. And in their story, there's nothing else. So ESPN does not have that. So what would lead us to believe that USA Today would? But USA Today, their headline, you know I love pointing out these headlines and talking to you about how like, like, are absurd. Let's see just how ridiculous and clickbaity their headlines are. Let's see, where did that head, you, god damn it, where did that headline go? I lost it. But the headline said that they have the Thanksgiving Day schedule out. I think they've changed it. It says Cowboys to Host Chiefs on Thanksgiving Day. Cool. I'm telling you, I read it early. It's

like they've changed it in the time I've been talking about it. But the headline was NFL Thanksgiving Schedule Released. Let me see if I go back to the main page here. Let's see here. It went away. It's been erased from existence, but I know I clicked on that damn story and that damn story, that's where I got to that story. So I'm telling you it was there. The headline said this is the Thanksgiving Day schedule for the NFL and then all it had was Chiefs versus Cowboys The Lions versus to be determined and to be determined versus to be determined That's what came up. I

Know this son of a bitch is here anyway, anywho It is not up there anymore. It's like it went away. It has been erased from existence and You can all pound sand for that USA Today. It's like it went away. It has been erased from existence and you can all pound sand for that USA today. It's because you know it was stupid. Maybe you got you got your mind right on that one. Now let's see. See. By the way, there's a story written by a gentleman named Scooby Scooby Axon wrote this story Cowboys to host Patrick

Mahomes, Kansas City Chiefs on Thanksgiving Day. But the other story that said this is the Thanksgiving Day schedule has gone away in the 15 minutes that we have been podcasting. Pretty remarkable because I don't see the damn thing anyway. Anywho, there you have it for Thanksgiving. Then of course they've got their tracker for schedule leaks. Saw some Saints fans saying like, boy we're not even good enough to have one leaked game. Yeah, because none of your fucking games are going to be on TV. No one gives a shit. But there you go. Christmas Day, there's local media reporting the Washington commanders and Minnesota Vikings are going to play a game on Christmas Day. Apparently the Vikings have to play two games out of the country. So best of luck to you

guys. Congrats. Travis Hunter Jaguars to open season at home. Cool. Falcons Bucks to meet in week one. So you got a division game. Does that mean the Saints are going to play the Carolina Panthers in week one? Maybe so. Maybe that's the league. That's just, you know, breaking things down as two division teams are going to play. So maybe they'll have the other two division teams play Lions and Packers to kick off season and NFC North Showdown.

That'll be fun, actually. Giants face brutal opening stretch. Well, when you suck, I break it to you here. But when you suck, all stretches are brutal stretches. You've got the all the international games, of course, which I think are stupid. Make your games better at home in America for your fans and not worry about fucking what Brazil thinks of the NFL. You're doing

just fine without Brazil. Play an exhibition game there, but don't take home games away from your actual consumers. And there you go. And of course, we don't know the full Thanksgiving Day schedule. We just know the Lions versus TBD, Cowboys versus Chiefs, and TBD versus TBD. And that feels like the TBD, here's going to be my guess. And I have no reason. I think one of these two teams will at least be a team that appears in the Thursday night Thanksgiving game. And if it's already come out and I sound stupid fine but I haven't seen it anywhere else.

Either the Pittsburgh Steelers or the Ravens are going to play on the Thursday nighter or San Francisco for whatever reason those three teams feel like realistic candidates to play the late one because I feel like they always do. So remember this Steelers, Ravens, Niners, one of those three teams will be at least involved in the late game on Thanksgiving and we will have more to come.