The Josh Innes Show - Will Uncle Travy Retire?!?

Episode Date: February 12, 2025

We start with a nice comment from a listener. This person believes I should start a Philly specific podcast and become the Joe Rogan of Philly. I'm not positive that would work. I think I missed that window in 2016. Speaking of podcasts, Travis Kelce, who spent all of last week saying he'd play in 2025, is now considering retirement. Gotta keep the Swifties listening to the pod. Speaking of the Kelce's, is there are doubt that Jason is going to invade the Eagles victory parade? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

The following was recorded from inside an ice plunge. Ah! Woo! Okay. All right. When a Coors Light is cold enough, the mountains on the can turn blue. So the next time you want a cold lager, cold filter, cold package Coors Light, just wait until those glorious mountains on the can turn blue.

It's easy to say that fast when you're freezing cold. Hello, friends. Just a snowy day. Yep, that's right. A snowy day. I don't know why I trumped that. That's right.

Yes, that's right. It's incredible. It's snowing. And yeah, so we have snow here. Hopefully it's not a lot of snow. If it is a lot of snow, you may never hear from me again because I'm going to end up dead like Jack Nicholson in the end of The Shining. Spoiler alert. You're going to just see me frozen like that.

So hopefully it's not a lot of snow. And that's where we are in St. Louis right now, which means I'm kind of held hostage in the house right now. I don't want to be held hostage in the house. I'd like to go do something. Today's a big Thursday of foreign hockey to bet on, but of course I can't get my fat ass over to Illinois because the roads are in bad shape because this place has no concept of how to handle roads when there's snow. Sons of bitches, I tell you. But anyway, glad you guys are listening. Glad you've been telling your friends about the podcast. Glad you've been spreading the word. Glad you've been interacting on social media. That's very cool. I've been posting different videos and shit trying to get the because as I give you a weekly update on what goes on in the search for a job, because I still need an actual job,

I got a message from a guy, and he was like, Hey, I listened in Philadelphia. Why didn't you just do a Philly podcast? You'd be the Joe Rogan of Philadelphia. I, honest to God, believe I could have. And I've told you this before, and here's where I think I missed the boat on that. This was the missed opportunity. The missed opportunity was right after I got fired at WIP and I was doing these Facebook videos that were getting concurrently thousands

of people watching them. And after the fact, they were getting tens, I think 20, 30,000 views. People were watching them. And it was intriguing because I had just been fired and I just decided to sit my ass on the couch I gave my home phone number out to people for people to call like it was kind of a weird like I'm sure there's a lot of people maybe that never saw that because it was such a short period of time that I did that but um yeah I sat on the couch and just talked and then of course doing what I tend to, I just started doing weird shit on it and fewer and fewer people started watching to the point that it was just kind of like, you know, they're like, go fuck yourself, which that's kind of what I do. I don't know why I do these things, but I do. But that's where the opportunity was missed let me see who this guy is let me give him credit for asking that or mentioning that on that was on twitter let me see here that was andrew culp uh how have you not started a philly sports podcast you need you don't need 97.5 or 94.1 it's 2025 nobody is listening to the radio anyway you would be the joe rogan of philly run a billboard on 76 for a few months you'd crush signed McDougal well thank you Andrew Culp um I tell you that's where I think I missed the

opportunity I think the opportunity was missed I think the window closed on that I did a decent I got a decent number of people from Philly that listened when I was doing the the Houston and Philly podcast when I first launched the pod back in 2019. But aside from that, the opportunity that was missed was seizing that moment. But that was really early in the game too. I know we've talked about this even recently, but that moment in time was still very early in the podcast game. was in 2016 and while there were a lot of podcasts like now everyone's got a podcast every athlete's got a podcast every actor's got a podcast every actor's wife has a podcast every uninteresting former eagle center's wife has a podcast like everybody's got podcasts and everybody thinks people give a shit about what they have to

say uh but back in 2016 that wasn't the case so if i would have done that in 2016 like you want to know someone to give credit to give credit to guys like spike in philadelphia whose podcast makes money and has a lot of listeners the content is nothing i'm interested in because i don't give two shits about listening to things about the ph 76ers and their weird hipster white fan base. But whatever. But he's done a good job with that. And I'm sure it makes him money. And it's got a big following of people.

And a lot of people download it. So that's pretty fucking cool. But that was where my opportunity was really missed to do that. Like when I'm in the news, when I'm, you know, because at the time, like, and here's why it was really missed. Because I wasn't getting paid I only got one more paycheck after I got fired so when I got fired in Houston I had six months of severance when I got laid off here in St. Louis I had six months of severance when they fired me in Philadelphia I had one paycheck basically two weeks pay is what they gave me

and we fought for that like I'm in a union i pay a union the union was like we're gonna get your fucking money because i was still owed like sixty thousand dollars on that contract or give or take and uh then they're like oh turns out we're not gonna get that so i was on a phone call with like the management people and with like these mediators and shit and these union people and the union was all geeked up when the phone call started they were telling me like we're gonna get your money don't you worry and then uh the phone call starts all right we're gonna give you two weeks and like the union guys like all right sounds good to us thanks for talking guys and i'm like what the fuck now the good news is i had another job waiting for me so it wasn't that big

of a deal but uh that's where i should have done it because i had no rules there was nothing holding me back i wasn't like gonna get sued by wip for shitting on them and they weren't going to take my money. They didn't give me money anyway. So that would have been kind of the opportunity to do that. That would have been the moment to seize, but I didn't seize that moment. Instead, I had to get my house packed up and I had to get everything ready to go to Houston. But that's where I really should have done it. When I got fired in Houston, I had to make sure I didn't say anything overly controversial or bad about the radio company, or I could have lost my severance in theory. So that's why I just kind of sat back and didn't do anything. This time, I actually did do things, and there are plenty of things I could say that have pissed me off, but I've done a good job.

I guess in my old age now, I'm getting older and wiser. And now that I'm wiser, I don't say as many things now my last paycheck comes one week from today or a couple like eight days from today so maybe at that point I'll just start shitting on people I don't know it depends like that once I realize the money train stops from someone I can really start to dig deep on how I was screwed over or how I fucked them or whatever so I'm sure that's something that could come along down the line, but, um, cause it's a fascinating world when people love you and they tell you that you're the fucking best and they fire you and you never hear

from them again. It's a fascinating world. Uh, but I'm sure we can dig into that next week. Once the, the, the gravy train is derailed. All right, let's play a couple commercials and we shall continue. All right, if you're ready to win some real cash during the basketball playoffs, you got to check out pick six from DraftKings. When it comes to basketball payouts, DraftKings pick six posterizes the competition, including prize picks. It's a very simple concept. Hit all your picks and score higher minimum payouts on pick six plus even more cash if you outscore the competition pick six is available in most states including Missouri California Texas Georgia and more and I absolutely love it look every night

we're going to be having playoff basketball every night so when you're sitting around and you might not have interest in a particular game let's say you're a fan of a particular team, they're not playing that night, here's how you make it a little bit more fun for the other games. Build a little lineup there with Pick 6. It's really great. Me and my wife do it all the time, so make sure you do it. And new players get 50 in Pick 6 credits instantly on just a $5 entry. Download the DraftKings Pick 6 app now and use code INNES, that's my name, I-N-N-E-S, for new customers to play. $5, get 50 in pick six credits, better payouts, bigger wins, only with pick six from DraftKings.

The crown is yours. Gambling problem? Call 1-800-GAMBLER. Help is available for problem gambling. Call 888-789-7777 or visit ccpg.org in Connecticut. Must be 18 plus. Age and eligibility restrictions vary by jurisdiction. Pick six not available everywhere, including New York and Ontario.

Void where prohibited. One per new customer. Bonus award. It is non-withdrawable Pick 6 credits that expire in 14 days. Limited time offer. See terms at pick6.draftkings.com slash promos. All right. Speaking of podcasts, the New Heights podcast, this $100 million podcast that is basically anchored by a bunch of psychotic

Taylor Swift listeners. They had a big show yesterday because they had to talk about the aftermath of the Super Bowl and what's going to happen. It's very emotional. These are two very emotional minutes of soap opera. Their podcast is two brothers doing a soap opera. One of them's fucking crying over the fact that he doesn't play for the eagles anymore and they want a super bowl without him and god forbid somebody do something without jason kelsey and the other guy is crying because you know they lost the super bowl and he doesn't know if he's going to play anymore now keep in mind that travis kelsey spent all of last week when answering questions at the super bowl answered questions about this

and said i'm going to play my plan is to 2025. But now, because you got to get those podcast listens up, and you got to keep your name in the news, you got to keep it out there, you got to keep people guessing, you got to make it a soap opera. Now it's, I don't know if I'm going to play. Yeah, we got to see. And of course, all the little Taylor Swift-y girls will flood his little Twitter accounts and his little Instagram. Oh, please, Uncle Traffy. Oh, Traffy. Oh, we don't want you to stop playing. But if you do, please tour with Mother. Next time Mother tours, could you guys, can you, oh God, can you do more stuff on stage with Mother? Oh, we love you. Oh, you know who's horrible? It's that horrible black man that said all those awful things.

All those awful things about us. Damn it. Can you believe all that bad stuff that that black man that said all those awful things all those awful things about us damn it can you believe all that bad stuff that that black man on the field said about mothers saying that you should be banging black chicks i tell you what why don't you just go listen to beyond saying fuck you fuck you we're swifties we're nice people except if you say something bad about mother we'll say horrible racial vile and ins, and insensitive, and sexist, and racist, and misogynist, and homophobic. We'll say every bad thing about you. But why you gotta be so mean? Cause all you are is mean, and a liar, and pathetic, and drunk, and all, and mean, and mean, and mean. Hey, Uncle Travi, someday I'll be living in a big old city, and all you're ever gonna be is mean. Why don't you go back to welfare, black football player, and leave mother

alone? Yeah, we're Swifties. You know what? She wears short skirts, and I wear a t-shirt. She's cheer captain. I don't know why women have to be so hateful towards each other. Here, let me sing a Taylor Swift song about women hating each other. But it's different. It's different when mother does it. When mother does it, it's totally fine. Because when mother does it, she's responding to some bitch that probably took some man that she should have already had or she started it. I'm here for women empowerment unless one of those bitches is Beyonce trying to act like she's better than mother.

Beehive, get the fuck out of here. I got a friendship bracelet. I made a friendship bracelet. So I'm a good person. I go to the Taylor Swift show and I call a celebrity mother. I go to the Taylor Swift show and I call a celebrity mother. I'm fucking wild. I'm not some mean football playing gentleman man who says, a gentleman's a stretch.

What we have here, he's like a Jake Gyllenhaal. That's what he's like. He's like black Jake Gyllenhaal. That's what he is. Saying bad stuff. Saying evil stuff about Mother and Uncle Travi. Fuck you. I'm sorry I used that language, but fuck you. Doing that kind of shit to Mother.

How dare you? How dare you? I sold my Nissan to get tickets to the heiress tour. And I went three nights in a row. I support mother and mother loves me. That's what's interesting about those kind of people. The interesting thing about the wacko Taylor Swift people, or really any fan bases, is how like they cut for these people and these people don't give two fucks about them.

Like mother doesn't care about you. But in their mind, mother does care about them like speaking of Taylor Swift and by the way so Uncle Travi we don't know if Uncle Travi is going to retire or not we don't know yet um because Uncle Travi who spent all of last week leading up to the Super Bowl saying he wasn't going to retire like I don't even know why the inclination like why there's even an idea that he would like the guy still plays at a relatively high level had a relatively shitty season this year for his standards, but they kind of all did on the chiefs. Like they weren't very good.

If you watched any of their games, they pulled off miracles that got a lot of help from the fellas and the ladies and stripes. But what do I know? But here's the dealio friends. So what we're dealing with here is a situation where uncle travi now looking for attention i don't know like i didn't think that uncle travi was the one that seeked attention or sought attention like we know that uncle jason we know that jason really likes attention like this guy can't live without it jilly was asking me if she thinks that jason going to be at the Eagles parade. And I'm like, come on, Jilly. Is the Pope Catholic?

Does the Pope shit in the woods? Like, yes. Is Jason Kelsey going to be there? It's just a matter of how he gets there. Is he going to like rappel from a helicopter? Is he going to like parachute in from a helicopter dressed as the Philly Fanatic? I don't know. Is he going to like jump out of a helicopter dressed as the Philly Fanatic with Bryce Harper

riding in like a like a baby Bjorn on the front of him like what is he gonna do that's the only question if you don't think Jason Kelsey is gonna be at the Eagles parade shirtless making the whole thing about himself you've got another thing come on because you're fucking stupid I like you but if you don't think Jason Kelsey is gonna take this moment that has zero to do with him and make it all about him, but then doing it in that way that makes it seem like he's doing it in a selfless way, he's kind of mastered the art of that. The man is actually, he has a gift. I'll give him that. He has a gift of taking things that have nothing to do with him, making them about himself, but making it seem selfless.

And you got to give him some form of credit for that like eagles win the super bowl and the story is i'm chasing kelsey and i'm kind of sad that i'm not with my guys and then i had to you know deal with my uh like you know i had the whole this horrible situation where my my brothers were on one team but my brother was on another and uh i didn't know what to do i i was torn and like like in my mind like just sad music plays like i'm never going to listen to their stupid podcasts because i just don't find them to be interesting people but and i don't listen to a ton of pods anyway but i'm certainly not going to listen to these two doofs they just don't intrigue me but like and like in my mind there's

some sad emotional music playing the whole time it's like some chicken soup for the soul shit or like that moment an episode of full house, like where there's like this, like, where like someone has to admit the bad shit they did. And then that emotional music starts playing or like something sad, like, well, you know, dad, I did it because, you know, mom died and like everybody's sad. You know, that's like what I imagine, like their whole podcast is just two blubbering dipshits crying over dumb shit, like whether or not you're going to retire and how sad you were that your buddies won a Super Bowl without you. Like you got you sent a hundred million dollar podcast deal to sit around and pull pud with your brother. Your life doesn't suck.

Don't go make the whole goddamn thing about yourself. This shouldn't be that difficult. But it is because they need it. Like over the weekend, I was talking about Jameis Winston I'm sure many of you saw Jameis Winston all over social media because Jameis Winston was um was working at uh we're working for Fox right so they had Fox that was um you know like they used him as a correspondent and Jameis was so charming doing this like he's an extremely charming guy he's he's funny he's naturally funny he i'm sure he knows he's putting on a show to a degree but what makes jamis winston so good is that he just seems like he's naturally a doofus right like just naturally he's got a funny a

naturally funny personality which a lot of black dudes do by the way they're just some black dudes just have natural funny personalities like a lot of white dudes don't really have naturally funny personalities look I'm being divisive here but it is the reality a lot of white dudes like Jim Carey doesn't have a naturally funny personality Jim Carey has to be really fucking obnoxious like you know to be kind of funny Jason Kelsey is not a funny person Jason Kelsey has to be kind of funny. Jason Kelsey is not a funny person. Jason Kelsey has to be obnoxious to get people's attention. Whereas like, I feel that there's a natural comedic quality that Jameis Winston has that some dudes do. Like sometimes there's just certain ways that dudes live. Like I think Vince Vaughn in his delivery of things is funny. Like his, his kind of overall

demeanor and delivering lines is funny. Chris Tucker, when you think about Chris Tucker, look, here's reality. There are things that black comedians can say and do not even the content of it, but the delivery of it, that the delivery just makes it funny. It happens with different groups of people. George Lopez says some shit. And if anybody else says that you'd be like some white guy tries to do the same thing. It just wouldn't hit. It wouldn't land in the same way. There aren't too many things that are a white thing that work that way.

Right? So if you look at George Lopez, one of my favorite lines from any George Lopez stand-up is when he's explaining being a young kid watching your fucking uncle have a heart attack. And the uncle's like, I got a pain in my chase and I can't breathe. And I'm like, a white dude could do that and it wouldn't be funny. But George Lopez does the bit and the bit's fucking hysterical. I got a pain in my chase and I can't breathe. I'm saying that you're probably not even thinking it's funny. But if you watch George Lopez do it, it's a great fucking line.

And then like the aunt comes over and she's like, oh, you got a pain in your chase and you can't breathe and you need my help now, huh? Oh, so now you don't think I'm ugly no more huh like it like it's fucking phenomenal like if you watch the original kings of comedy and you watch the one of my favorite fucking lines in the history of any stand-up any it comes from the guy who was technically the mc of the original kings of comedy and that's steve harvey one of the funniest fucking lines you're ever going to hear in a stand-up is steve harvey talking about titanic and they said the band played while the ship was going down and like again white people can't do this because they don't have the point of reference but it's what black band you know gonna play while the ship goes down, right?

And the greatest line ever is, Cool and the gang would have been like, and he pantomimes pulling the cord out of the wall and wrapping up. Like, that's the kind of shit that just certain white dudes cannot do. White people cannot do. That is just a naturally fucking funny delivery that guys have. Fucking Richard Pryor had a naturally funny delivery. Like, it's just the delivery that guys have fucking Richard Pryor had a naturally funny delivery like it's just the delivery that works Chris Tucker like there's like sometimes you're watching Chris Tucker in some of these 90s 2000s early 2000s Chris Tucker moves and the lines aren't even

particularly funny but Chris Tucker just has a naturally funny way of fucking delivering the line like again random line that no one's going to care about but there's a movie called um i forgot what it was called money talks there was a movie with chris tucker and he's like a kind of low-level hustler and he ends up teaming up with charlie sheen who's like a uh a news guy and he ends up kind of like tagging along with him right like a black and white buddy comedy deal and like he's at at the party where he's meeting uh charlie sheen's rich in-laws or whatever and he's talking to like the italian you know father-in-law and he goes what's your name he goes

uh vic damone jr and the dad knows who vic damone is he goes hey it's vic damone and diane carroll's kid like and it's just like there's certain lines and they're like, Victor Moan, junior, junior. And it's just like so stupid, but it works and it wouldn't work if it was delivered by someone else, right? That's how I feel about Jameis Winston. Jameis Winston has this naturally funny demeanor about him that makes me laugh.

He's a naturally, like, it seems like he's goofy with ease. He's not trying to be stupid. Like like there's no one that could try to do the eat the w thing in a huddle and try to be good that dude's trying to be serious he's just naturally fucking goofy that's where i get annoyed with like jason kelsey is i don't find jason kelsey to be interesting or funny jason kelsey has to go out and rip his shirt off and chug beers and like, hey, he's an everyman. Newsflash. Everyman doesn't go out and rip off their shirt and fucking chug beer. Now, the everyman may drink a lot of beer and the everyman may sit around in his backyard and play Yahtzee and listen to Yacht Rock, whatever, but the everyman doesn't just rip his fucking shirt off on camera and chug beer. But people are like, boy, that Jason Kelsey, he's just like us. Bullshit,

he's just like us. He's a rich motherfucker that rips his shirt off for show. Like, whatever is what it is. But anyway, so all that to say that the Kelsey's podcast, we learned that Jason is torn and that Travis may retire, even though like three days ago he said he was not going to retire but now he may retire because he needs you to keep listening to his podcast and there you have it more to come