The Kevin Sheehan Show - Wizards April Foolish

Episode Date: April 3, 2026

Kevin and Thom today with Artemis 2 to start followed up by the Wizards April Fools joke that fell flat and required an official apology. Kirk Cousins to Vegas, the Nats, and more as well.   For all your football betting needs: DCRELOAD at MyBookie for a 50% Deposit Match Our listeners get the Harry’s Plus Trial Set for only $10 at https://www.Harrys.com/[INSERT CODE]  #Harryspod For all your garden needs: fastgrowingtrees.com/sheehan Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

You don't want it. You don't need it. But you're going to get it anyway. The Kevin Cheehan Show. He is Kevin. Tommy's here. I am here. The show's presenting sponsors,

as always, Window Nation. 86690 Nation for Window Nation. com if you need new windows. Tommy, I'm assuming these I've not talked to you since we did the show on Tuesday, that you're unaware of what happened at the beginning of this show. Or maybe you are aware of it, I don't know, are you? No, I'm, what, did something happen? Did I do something wrong?

No, you didn't do anything wrong. Do you remember that we started this show and I got frustrated and I stopped? And you said, what's wrong? And I said, I'm just tired and I hate sports. Yes, okay. Remember? I do remember that. Yeah, well, tip.

That's why I was so happy and peppy this morning. I'm trying to talk you up. a little bit. Well, you don't need to talk me up. That was just, you know, that was just a moment, but I didn't edit that part out of the show. Yeah. Yeah. So it was out there for a while. And then I went back and after I started getting tweets and text messages, I went back and edited it out. And honestly, I probably didn't need to edit it out. But I got a lot of feedback on that. And there was an email that I read on the show yesterday that I should have saved for you

because this was very much complimentary of you on the show. This came from Jake C. Jake C wrote, Kevin, I don't like sports this time of the year either, but I still love listening to the show, especially when Tom is on. I don't really even consider the show a sports show when Tom's on with you. Not sure others feel the same way, but keep doing what you're doing because it's part of my daily ritual. And that's very nice of him to say. A lot of people really love the show when you're on it.

Many people, trust me, prefer the show when you're on it versus when you're not on it. Oh, I don't know. I get a lot of feedback saying that, you know, that, you know, I don't listen when Tom's on. Yeah, well, of course. I mean, but when we did the radio show, I got all the stuff that said, I wish you weren't on the show and it was just Tommy. You know, it's a, it's a subjective thing. Whatever. Right. We've made it this long somehow. But, you know, speaking of the show, not being a sports show, you just said to me, we've got to talk. talk about Artemis. We've got to talk about this, you know, launch on this moon mission. Now, I'll be, I'll be honest with you. I want to defer to you because you've been watching launches all winter long. And I'm assuming that you were really into this. I wasn't necessarily.

I mean, I know the general gist of it, but tell me what's going on with Artemis 2. First of all, did you watch it live? No, I did not watch it live. I ended up watching the, I I know. Apparently, it was very dramatic. Yes. Yeah. Yeah, because they had to hold the countdown for a while because there was a battery problem. Oh, boy. You know, but they fixed it.

Look, I saw this Artemis Rocket. I was at Kennedy Space Center in February. Well, we took a tour of the Space Center. I highly recommend it to anyone who's in the Cocoa Beach area. you know, we saw like the control room from the Apollo missions. So when they showed the control room for Artemis, I mean, I could really relate to it. I had a real sense of what was going on and what they were talking about more than just off the street. And then, you know, we could see Artemis.

It was far away, but we could see it. And this was when the launch was going to be in February. and then they had to delay it and then delay it some more. And then they, you see, it was out on the launch pad when I was there.

So very visible. And then they had to take it back off and bring it back in the building. And that's on a very heavy-duty truck, a cart, however you want to call it.

That apparently goes very slow because it's carrying this rocket. You know, it's carrying this rocket back to the building to work on. Yeah. And I think it takes, like, for two, for a mile or two, I think it takes like 12 or 13 hours. Wow. God.

Yes. Yes. So they, I guess, they wield it back out, you know, and this time, everything went smooth. And I really felt it because I was just there. And, like you said, I saw a bunch of rocket launches. I said all kinds of emotions. I sent, you know, excitement. I felt frustration thinking, I should be on that beach outside our condo

watching this rocket launch, you know? With a cigar in your mouth. Yes. Yeah. And a cold beer in your hand. Yes, absolutely. I felt nervous. But instead you're in Frederick.

I felt really nervous because it's a man. I mean, most of the, all but one of the rocket launches I saw were not manned. I saw one manned mission where they sent the crew back up to the space station. But I was very nervous. You know, I mean, I lived through, I guess, I forget what it was, Apollo 7 or Apollo. One of the Apollo missions where it blew up on the, you know, on the landing pad. And I think Walter White and a couple of the other astronauts were killed. Walter White was killed.

I thought he got killed in the meth lab that he, you know, at the very end in the final episode. To the great song of Baby Blue. Yes, great song. Tommy, I think I'm familiar with Apollo 7, but not intimately. Just tell me, because this is, I mean, I certainly remember Apollo 13 and have seen the movie about Apollo 13. I remember when, vaguely, I mean, I don't know if I remember the walk on the moon, Neil Armstrong, but I certainly, you know, vividly remember everything about the space shuttle disaster, you know, in 86. That was, that was obviously such a sad moment and really impacted, you know, our space program from that moment forward, right?

I mean, I forget what the fallout was, but I just remember that thing blowing up and not knowing exactly what I was watching and even the, you know, the families and the people that were watching for a moment. They weren't sure if that was like the next level of, you know, propulsion. But it wasn't. And that school teacher, I can't remember her name was on that flight. I think it was Christy McCall. Yes, that's it. Yeah. Right.

Yeah. Oof. Yeah. Absolutely. So I felt a lot of anxiety. I didn't watch it live. So were you anxious just because it was manned, right? There are four of them.

There are four astronauts on this thing? Yes. And the intention is to orbit the moon, which has never been done before. This isn't going to be a moon landing. They're going to orbit the entirety of the moon. We've never... So they're going to go farther than anyone's gone before. Right.

And it's 10 days? But no one's never been around the other side of the moon. So what are they going to see on the other? side of the moon. What are they going to see on the other side of the moon? Do we know? Billboards. Jackie Leason-Stace. You know, in the moon. Billboard saying the end is near.

Yes. And you know what else I liked on social media today, which I retweeted, and I wasn't the only one who posted this. But somebody posted pictures from the rocket showing Earth and said, Not flat. Yeah. I enjoyed that part. Well. But it was a historic moment.

You know, I'm still, you know, it reminded me in a way, and I don't want to diminish the moment. I'm not trying to do that. The anxiety I used to feel before a heavyweight title fight. Well, that's, oh, my God. To me, as a sports fan my entire life, The most electric, anticipatory moment is being in the arena for a big fight. There's nothing that I've ever experienced close to that. Yes, and you have no stake in it.

I mean, I had no stake in except to write a story. But, you know, my stomach would be churning. I mean, I sense that something traumatic was going to happen. And I felt the same way, you know, during the case. countdown for the rocket launch, although this is much more serious stakes. But I felt that while I was watching. And I'm going to pay close attention to it. I forget how long it lasts.

It says 10 days. 10 days. Yeah. 10 days. So it's more than a three hours. It's more than a three hours for. Yeah. No.

We've talked about this before. You wouldn't get on this thing, would you? No. No, no, no. No. Listen, I have, my goal now is to limit the chances of me getting hurt. Yeah. So, no.

I don't even get on a bike anymore. Yeah, Mike. I used to ride a bike once in a while, but I'm thinking, why would I ride a bike and increase my chances of falling and breaking a risk or something like that? I don't need to ride a bike, you know. So, yeah, I'm limiting exposure to injuries, so I certainly wouldn't go on a rocket. My wife texted me and said, are you watching this? And I said, what? And she said, you know, the launch, the space launch.

I'm like, no, I really didn't know it was happening yesterday. And you know what I was doing when she texted me? I was knee-deep in this story about Jalen Hertz. on ESPN.com. So don't say she and hates sports all the time. I, because I found that a riveting story about Jalen Hertz and the Eagles. We'll get to that at some point. But yeah, I can imagine, especially given that there are people on this one and most of these

launches are unmanned. And they did, I'm reading here, they did have an issue with sort of the last unmanned mission that was intending to do something like this with the heat shield, which I think was part of the issue and the concern with Apollo 13. Yeah, well, the space shuttle, too. Space shuttle issue. It's all about heat shields these days, boys, all about heat shields. That's well, again, in the countdown, there were some questions about a battery.

Oh, boy. Can you imagine if you're on the thing and you're in the countdown and then somebody says we may have an issue with a battery? stop that thing right away, which you said they did. Yeah, they stopped it because there was a battery that was important, as I understood it, that if something went wrong with the rocket, they could, it would help them, like, shoot away from it for their own little capsule. I don't quite understand the details, but it was an important battery.

and they got the situation resolved, and then they started to count down again. And it was, you know, geez, it was a great moment. I just really thought it was a really cool moment. Has this interested you, your entire life space, the exploration of it? I mean, I wouldn't say it's something that's dominated. Look, I remember the moon landing and the world. walk on the moon. I was in, I was in Miami that summer with my sister. I remember watching that. So I mean, I lived, I through John Glenn was a hero of mine growing up because he was the first

astronaut to ever orbit the earth. And then he had a ticker tape parade for him when they did these things back then in New York City. I remember that because I was wanted to go, but then I had to have my consuls taken out. Oh, God. So I couldn't go. So I've always been interested, but I wouldn't say it's a passion of mine. I think it was probably, you know, for me, because, you know, all of this was happening when I was a small child. But through the 70s, you know, being an astronaut was, you know, one of those things that young boys wanted to become.

Not me. I wanted to become a football player or a basketball player. But, you know, I wasn't attending like space camp in the summers. But I do remember being a little bit interested in it, but not so much. It certainly wasn't a thing. I'm reading right now about Artemis, too. Did you know that this is the first mission with an actual toilet on board? I did read that somebody wrote in one of the stories. that this one, this, this rocket has a toilet.

They've never, they made note of that, apparently that that's something new. It's brand new, apparently they've always, they've always gone in bags before and then stored it. I mean, how gross is that? I mean, I can only imagine how foul some of these early, you know, space, you know, excursions were. But listen to this. already, and there's this story out right now,

a little bit of a potty problem on Artemis 2 already. The toilet fan is jammed, and so they're now trying to come up with instructions on how to get into the fan and clear that area to revive the toilet for the mission. Because it looks, oh God, there's some... In the meantime, they're getting their contingency, their backup waste management capability

specifically for urine, the fecal collection of the toilet, that specific capability can still be used with the waste management system aboard. Well, that's the most important part. Well, yeah, yeah. Of the two.

I mean, you don't think when they went in bags that I would hope that they were stored in something rather than the bags were just floating around in the rocket. God. Yeah. That's funny. That is not...

Well, I mean, if you've got... I wonder if they've got real food, rather than, like, the powdery things or the things they used to squeeze. Remember, like, space food was, like, a big deal. Yeah, they're drinking Tang. Yeah. You remember Tang?

Of course. Tang was great. That was the whole thing about Tang. It was something that supposedly that they gave the astronauts. Right. And that's what sold Tang. I never I try tang and that and particularly like it.

Well it was it wasn't like we had my parents bought Tang. I mean it was in the house. It wasn't in the house all the time. But I remember it was a big deal because you're right. It's what astronauts drank. And it was this kind of, you know, it was an orange powder that created this orange drink that wasn't terrible. There were a lot of things that probably were really terrible back then that we just didn't know we're terrible. paired it today.

Right. Like, I used to drink Hawaiian punch. Oh, sure, sure. Use the can opener. I don't even if they still have it anymore. Use the can opener to open it.

You know, you'd open the one for pouring and then you'd have to, you know, create the air hole on the other side. Yes. Yeah. To make the pouring easy. Yeah.

Yes. God, man. Well, I haven't had a Hawaiian punch in years. Well, I know a Hawaiian that would love to take a swing at you. That is,

that's going to be interesting to watch this. We just, you know, just wanted to go well. You want it to be safe. Yes. But there's, you know... I would recommend to anyone who hasn't seen it yet that you watch the movie the right stuff.

Yeah. About the Mercury Astronauts, the first astronaut. It's a terrific movie. Okay, I highly recommend it if you have a... Great 80s movie. Yeah. Real quickly. Do you have any clue I'm looking for?

What is this cost? What's the cost of something like this? It must be massive. Yeah. I mean, it absolutely has to be. So what is the benefit for doing this? Well, you know, according to Elon Musk, this is, I mean, he wants to go to bar. $4.2 billion.

dollars. The program overall, the Artemis program, is estimated to cost $90 billion, but it's $4.2 billion per launch. God. You know, the idea is supposedly to try to find a way that eventually get to Mars, you got to take some baby steps before that. We got to go beyond the moon before you can talk about going to Mars. Yeah. I don't know, man. That's a lot of money. Seems like a lot of money. I know. Did you have, have you known about, you know, we always refer to them as UFOs, unidentified, you know, flying objects. Do you know that there's now, you know, a new, I don't know if it's a government term.

I don't know if it's a, you know, a space industry term. But, you know, I started to hear this recently and I'm like, I don't know what that is. And then I'm like, whoa, they're talking about UFOs. they're called UAPs unidentified aerial phenomena that's what they're now called UAPs not UFOs anymore because

probably go ahead well I'm guessing it's because it's not necessarily you know a flying thing it's not a you know it's not a spacecraft that's unidentifiable because we've seen

aerial phenomena we've seen some of these crazy sort of lights and these things moving that can't be identified. You know, that's happened a lot. Yes. Do you believe that in, do you think that we've been visited? Do you think that there's something way out in New Mexico that, what's it called? Area 51. Yeah, Area 51.

They opened in what, the 40s, that there's some, there's some weird stuff in there? That have visited us and been captured? Because, again, I believe generally, you know, people like to talk. Yeah. Okay. Well, especially the current president, not that we're going to get political. But I have a feeling that if presidents really knew about what's happened and what's visited our planet, this particular president would have told us already.

Oh, absolutely. So I just think that that would, I mean, we're talking about, you know, many, many years of secrecy. And I just think something like that, which would be the greatest discovery in the history of the world. Am I right? Yeah.

What would, you know, I guess, I guess maybe electricity, but that was for a short period of time compared to the overall universe time. Yeah. Yes. That would be the biggest discovery of the world.

I just don't see how you could have people involved who would just sit on that for decades and decades. This is always the fallacy about conspiracies. It's a lot of people have to keep quiet in order for them to be conspiracies. Yeah. Very true. Very true on that. I just looked up like kind of the all-time list of discoveries. And in terms of physical and chemical discoveries, electricity is one.

Gravity is two. But DNA structure, which was discovered in 1953, is considered to be the biggest breakthrough discovery scientifically ever. Penicillins two. Wow. So both, at least, you know, penicillin wasn't in my lifetime. It was years earlier, but, and actually, DNA wasn't either because I was born a year later. So I was going to say in my lifetime, but, you know, because I was trying to make it about me. Yeah, it's what you like to do.

That's why people either love you on this show or can't stand you on this show. We wrap up the first segment the way we started it. We'll talk some sports next after these words from a few of our sponsors. Hey guys, how about a barbershop quality shave from the comfort of your own home? That's the Harry's Plus experience, and I've been experiencing it for over a year now. My old razor's dulled too fast, irritated my neck. That experience was the furthest thing from the close, smooth, Harry's Plus shave I enjoy now. Harry's Plus has an advanced pivoting system that reaches every corner of your face.

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You can also call them at 86690 Nation. Tommy, oh, those wizards, they were up to some shenanigans last. night on April 1st, April Fool's Day. I'll get to that in a moment. They lost the game 153 to 131 to the Philadelphia 76ers at home. You know, I don't know if you followed that stretch when they're getting a little bit close to getting outside of the bottom four. So what did they do? They just decided to go ahead and lose 16 straight games.

And now they have actually lost 20 of their last 21 games. last night 153 to 131, but I noticed something is that the point totals that this team gives up. Now, you see it across the NBA, 153 points they gave up. I mean, that's just unbelievably terrible. You know what? I can't wait until they turn it on the defense that they've been holding back. Oh, me neither. You know?

Can't wait. I can't wait until next year where all of a sudden, they're a defensive stalwart. You know? They're locked down. A locked down wizard. Well, you know, don't expect it from Trey Young. And I know you're being sarcastic, of course.

But Anthony Davis can actually defend. Yeah, I know. He's been a multi-time defensive player of the year. But how about these totals that they've given up? 145 points last week against the Knicks. They gave up 150 to Miami two weeks, three weeks ago, 138 they gave up. During the course of the year, they've given up 142, 130 plus many times, like dozens of times it would seem. 146 they gave up one night. 148 they gave up one night.

I just don't know how you give up that many points in a 48-minute game. This isn't the 80s with the Denver Nuggets playing the Spurs. I mean, it's just, it's unbelievable. The point totals, the Wizards give up. I'm assuming they're the worst defensive team in points given up per game. I'm going to look at this. I've not looked at it. Actually, Indiana, Indiana has the most 30-point losses by an NBA team this season when I was to thread. And the Wizards allow 124.3 points per game on average, but it's only the second worst in the NBA to the Utah Jazz. If I go back 10 years. All right, let's go back to the 2015-2016 regular season.

There's no way the point totals defensively or anywhere near this. 2015-2016, the worst team in the league gave up 109 points a game. Now it's 125 a game. The game has changed, but man, part of it is the tanking, because as you look at this list of the worst teams in the league, there's eight or nine teams that are tanking now. Yeah, I mean, the Jazz Wizards, Kings, and Pacers are all there among the worst five defensive teams in terms of points allowed. And they are, you know, among the league leaders in tanking.

You've got Indiana, Sacramento, and the Wizards in Utah all in the bottom five. But the Wizards now officially, as of today, have the worst record in the United. NBA. They are 17 and 59, so stay right there in the bottom four, which they will now, and maybe they can get a decent player. You know, did you watch, we talked about the Yukon Duke game on Tuesday's show, but I had Dwayne Simpkins on the show yesterday. I actually had Joe Crispin, John Crispin, excuse me, his brother on the radio show yesterday. You actually told me before we started to record, you really liked him. as a guest.

Yes, I was listening to the show yesterday on my way to my eye doctor's appointment, I might say. We don't want to hear the details. No, I know we don't want to hear that. And he's very good. Excellent. He was very, very good. I really enjoyed that segment. So John Crispin played college basketball, Penn State, and UCLA.

His brother also played and played in the NBA for a while. And he's an analyst on ESPN calls games for ESPN. calls games on Peacock and NBC, has done a bunch of Big Ten games this year. He's excellent. He was on the show, but he's like the fourth or fifth guy that I have had on the show in the last month, month and a half that have all doubled down on what I believe to be true, which is Cameron Boozer cannot be a top three pick in the NBA draft. And John said the same, you know, just said that there's just limits that, you know, there's a lot of things he does very well, and he'll do him well in the NBA, but there's a lot that he can't do, and that's problematic

on the college level, let alone on the NBA level. But he was really good, and Tommy, I don't know if you caught this, but John Crispin's grandfather still owns the Maryland high school boys single game scoring mark with 79. He scored in 1956. And John mentioned to me yesterday, think about this. He said, my grandfather was one of the first guys that was shooting jump shots from, you know, all over the floor. Like it looks, like basically it looks weird if you go back to the 50s because everybody was shooting a set shot. And my grandfather was shooting jump shots.

and it didn't look right to people, but he holds the single game scoring mark of 79, set in 1956, by the way, with no three-point line, clearly. You know, I can't believe that you didn't get close to that in your high school. No, never did, never did. I think 15 was the most I ever scored. I'm looking to see what we held the ball, Tommy, my senior year. played, we played, you know, clock offense.

We ran the clock and held the ball. I've told that story many times. I don't know where he went to high school. I'm trying to look it up. Okay, well, you know, the guy who invented the modern jump shot was Kenny Saylars at a University of Wyoming. I didn't know that. Yes.

Explain that to me. Kenny Saylars, in University of Wyoming, he's regarded as one of the players who developed a jump shot as an alternate to the two-handed flat-footed shot. He played college basketball for Wyoming in the early 40s, and then after the war came back to play some more in the late 40s. So that's when the jump shot started. Wow. And he played for the Baltimore Bulls for a while.

Yeah. I bet you think those teams could probably hold their own with today. days teams. No, I don't. You don't? No, I don't. Okay. Um, God, there's this... By the way, since we're talking about basketball here, let me just point out that today is the day where something tremendous happened in the NBA, and I think it should be recognized more than it is. Okay. I think it's one of probably the top five playoff performances of all time. Today's the day that Willis Reed scored in a playoff game, 36 points, and had 36 rebounds. And he did this against Wes Unseld and Gus Johnson.

That's impressive. For the Bullets. Yeah. Yes. He didn't do this against the Little Sisters of the Poor. Okay, he did this against two of the best rebounders in the history of the game. He is your guy, Indy? Yes, he is.

He's one of, he's my Mount Rushmore with Namath and Severe and Ali of athletes. Absolutely. All right. Did you read the story about Jalen Hertz? I read some of it. I read enough to know what, you know, what, you know, had already been buzzing out there that Jalen Hertz is a problem for the Eagles. Yeah, I mean, look, here's my biggest takeaway from this very long story written by Tim McManus and Jeremy Fowler on ESPN.com.

If you haven't read it and you're, you know, you're interested in the Eagles and the Jalen Hurts story and the reason that they've been kind of stale offensively, especially when it comes to their passing game, read inside the Eagles' 2025 friction as Jalen Hertz stands at a crossroads. It is a long story. I think what's really telling is just how many people were willing to talk negatively and speak negatively

anonymously, in many cases, about Jalen Hertz. That, to me, is telling. And by the way, on the record and, of it. But I still come back to this, and I don't know why I feel like Jalen Hertz needs a defender. I'm sure he has plenty of people in Philadelphia that look at him and say he's worthy of defending. He's won an awful lot, and he's been the reason at times that they've won. You know, the Super Bowl that they lost to the Chiefs, he may have been the best player in that game. You know, Mahomes won the MVP, but he may have been the best player in that football game.

He has, you know, a Super Bowl MVP. They won a Super Bowl. And he's about to play, Tommy, about to play with his seventh offensive coordinator in the NFL. Do you know what year this is for him coming up? Seven. It's his seventh season. All valid points. You're right about all that.

And then on top of this, you know, a lot of this has been sparked by A.J. Brown and the obvious dysfunction with A.J. Brown and J.L. H.T. I want to remind everybody that if you watch that playoff game, A.J. Brown short-armed and dropped multiple big throws in that game. I came in here that next day, and I said that was a disgusting performance by A.J. Brown. It was borderline suspicious in that game. game. He had a couple of those games, man. He had a game like that against the Chargers late in the season. It was a Monday night game or a Thursday night game. I'm forgetting right now. Look, they were, he apparently is a pain in the ass. Okay. The net of it on him from everybody about him is he's difficult to coach. He doesn't want, you know, to be in an offense. where he's under center more. By the way, that's what's coming with Sean Mannion.

I would imagine that this next year is do or die for Jalen Hertz in Philadelphia. But I also think, Tommy, if he were available, there'd be suitors for him. There would be people that would say, yeah, I'll take him. Because he's been a guy that's delivered in clutch games, in clutch moments. he's been a guy that's delivered when they've had to throw the football, and he's had to take chances, he's done it and done it well. But I'll tell you, there's a lot of focus in this story just on the last play of last season, where they came to the sideline, Jalen Hertz, Kevin Petulow, Nick Siriani.

Petulow was the offensive coordinator, his sixth in six years. And, you know, Petulah was thumbing through his playbook. It's fourth down. They've got to convert to stay alive. And Siriani looks to Hertz and says, what do you want to run? And he says, four verts. It was the play they ran on third down that didn't work. And there was a lot of criticism from a lot of people that said,

I can't believe that they let Jalen call the last play. And it was four verts. Now, I've heard a lot of conversation about this specific part of the piece. people will say, you know, four verts is four receivers just basically going downfield. But there's lots of things that can happen based on the defense of the fourverts. I mean, I've heard about fourverts from Cooley going back to 2013 in 2014. And it's a concept that's very common in the NFL. But based on the way it's defended, a lot of different things can happen.

It's not like the play just sends four guys deep, and there's no reaction to what, how it's being defended. The play did not work. It wasn't really close to working, and their season ended right then and there against a 49er team, remember, that was decimated by injuries, and then got absolutely blown out the following week by Seattle. But, you know, if you're not coachable and you're not, and you're not, and you're difficult for coaches, that is on him. That's a problem for sure. But, you know, man, this guy is going on his seventh offensive coordinator in the league. And remember, he went through multiples in college at Alabama and Oklahoma.

Yeah. I'm I guess I'm not surprised at this because it's sort of been coming and it's been bubbling up about Jalen Hertz might be the problem. It might be him more than Siriani or more than the offensive coordinator or more than A.J. Brown or more than the fact that the offensive one was banged up last year because that was a big part of why they couldn't run the football like they did in 2024. But it's going to be interesting in Philadelphia. I mean, I kind of feel like, you know, you never know with the NFL. It's impossible to sort of determine this.

But there's enough smoke right now around what's going on there to believe that they could have like the first big time step back year in a while, which could open it up in the division. I mean, we'll see, because they are talented. They're very talented. Do we believe that the, I think we have to believe that the NFC East is going to be pretty competitive this year, don't we think? Well, I mean, the Eagles. Do we think the Giants are going to take a step up? I mean, everybody's going to talk about the Giants.

They already are, and the Giants have a good roster. I'm not a believer in the Giants because of Jackson Dart. I'm not a believer in Jackson Dart. I think they have a quarterback problem. I think at the very least, that quarterback in his rookie year spent more time in the blue tent than he did on the field. Well, I think the Giants are probably going to take a step up with John Harbaugh. I think Dallas has too much talent not to be competitive, at least.

And we both think that the commanders are going to come back strong this year. And then there's the Eagles. So that's a competitive division right there. The Eagles have been to the postseason eight times in the last nine years. They've been to three Super Bowls and they've won two of them. By the way, with two different head coaches and with a couple of different quarterbacks. Obviously, Nick Foles ended up taking over for Carson Wentz for that first Super Bowl. But they have really, I mean, when you consider the Eagles over the last nine seasons, pretty damn impressive.

what they've done. The COVID year was their step back year. And we know that because we beat him at the end of the season to go to the playoffs and win the division at seven and nine. And that was it for Doug Peterson. And then Siriani came on. But God, man, Siriani's record, I mean, I kind of think he's a dope. But he's 59 and 26. And hasn't missed the playoffs.

He's been to two Super Bowls and one one. pretty impressive overall what they've been able to do with apparently a quarterback who's not coachable. And I keep... But it just shows the level of intensity, scrutiny, and the heat of the spotlight in Philadelphia sports. Yep. Absolute cauldron for... Yeah. For sports.

I mean, look at the Phillies. The Phillies win the division. They make the playoffs. You know, they go to the World Series one year. Not good enough. All right. Again, like, I can't believe that it was, it's been all on Jalen Hertz. I just can't believe that.

But this story certainly puts him into a do-or-die situation in 2026. I think Sean Mannion, you know, who comes from, you know, the Kevin O'Connell. He was in the, you know, he was in the quarterback room with Kirk Cousins in Minnesota when Kevin O'Connell and Kubiak was the offensive coordinator. He's been with Sean in L.A. That's the style of offense that Jalen Hertz apparently doesn't want to be in. He likes being in shotgun. He doesn't like turning his back to the defense.

But I also think like with Jaden, I think it's an offense that would actually suit him. speaking of Kirk cousins, he has found a home. We've got that and more to finish up the show with next after these words from a few of our sponsors. All right, Tommy, tell us about Shelley's backroom at 1331 F Street, Northwest. It's basically your Swiss Army knife of bars and restaurants because it can serve different purposes. It's a great place to bring you to sit down and have a nice dinner, offer their excellent menu of food. They've got, you know, tremendous food selection.

And as Kevin can attest to, very good, very good food. It's also a place where you can be casual and watch some sports on one of the eight high-definition TVs that they have surrounding, you know, the two bars. They have at Shelly's. Now, if it's Thursday, it's time for the Shelley's custom blend cigar facts. I say custom blend because shelley's on their menu, they offer custom blend beef. Okay, it's specially made for Shelly's back room. Okay, so we have our own custom blend facts, and these are not made up facts.

We don't make them up. These are real facts. Right. And today's fact is, Kevin. What's the fact today? What's today's fun fact, Shelley's style? Have you ever heard of a lector? A lector? Like somebody who speaks from a lectern?

Yes, L-E-C-T-O-R. Yeah, like a church thing. Well, in cigar factories, in the 19th and the early 20th century, they would hire a lector who would sit on like a, a lector. lifeguard stand kind of chair in the middle of the factory and read to the cigar rollers as they were rolling cigars. He'd read, he'd read books, you know, Shakespeare, Don Quixote, he'd read newspapers, and it was his job to keep, you know, the cigar rollers entertained while they were, you know,

rolling one cigar after another. I always thought that would be a great job to have. Really? A rear reader at a cigar factory? Absolutely. I think that'd be pretty cool to have. So that was the cigar fact for today. You can find out more at shelley's backroom.com.

And I'll be at Shelley's tomorrow night after the Nats game, the home opener with the Dodgers, at 1331 F Street, Northwest. in the district. I realized that we talked about something and tease something in the last segment that we actually never got to. And that was the April Fool's joke that the Wizards played on some poor soul last night during the game against the 76ers. If you don't know what happened, they put a guy out at half court, blindfolded him,

and said, you're shooting a half court shot for $10,000. And so he shot it, blindfolded, and they went nuts. And the music started and the celebration started. And he ripped his blindfold off. He's like, seriously? They're like, yeah, you made it. You made it. And then they're like, you want to see the highlight of it?

And they played the highlight back for him. It actually wasn't a bad shot considering he was blindfolded. It hit the top of the backboard. But it was actually online. And then, you know, they said, sorry about that, it's April Fool's, but we're going to give you an autographed jersey. I don't know who's autographing it. And we'll give you courtside seats for next year. I don't know if that's for a game or for a season.

I would imagine it is for one game because for a season, that would be worth more than $10,000. Yes. But that would be for a game. So where are we on this prank that the Wizards pulled? on this poor guy that thought he won for about two minutes, $10,000. Well, you know, I guess they have to do something to entertain people to take their minds off of the actual basketball that they're presenting for this team.

But, you know, the ironic part is the wizards are one big joke. You know, and it's nothing about April Fool's. They've been a 40-plus-year joke, and there's nothing funny about wasting the decades. of the NBA, some of them glory years that the league has gone through, while the Wizards have remained a joke. And they're a joke this year. And the joke is they're trying to be a joke.

Yeah. I had somebody email me yesterday talking about. Can you imagine if the commander's social media team got super creative on April Fool's Day? because, you know, there were some April Fool's jokes from NFL teams. Apparently the Browns sent out something with their helmets or something. Another team that's got no business. Well, about anything.

Yeah, but, you know, you got to create interest somehow if you're not doing it on the field. But it was T who sent it to me. Commander's social media team could really make a day of it on April Fool's Day. Here are a few. Welcome to Washington Max Crosby. if they just tweeted that out. Welcome back to D.C. Kirk Cousins. That one. That one would be worth of price of admission. There is some news on Kirk Cousins that we'll get to here in a moment.

And then how about this one? Good luck today, Jaden. Four to six weeks of recovery is nothing. What if they just tweeted that out? By the way, you did hear that Josh Harris and Adam Peters both kind of weighed in on the flag football thing. Apparently they did have to approve it, but they did so with fingers crossed. How about this one? If they just tweeted out a picture of the old logo, you know, the Blackie Wetzel logo. Nothing said, just tweeted it out.

That'd be mean. That would be mean. And then T. That would be mean. There'd be backlash over that. And then T. wrote, how about a Frank Herzog call of touchdown Washington Redskins with a curious pair of eyes emoji? Like, here comes the name back. It's a dangerous day.

It really is. Yeah. I mean, it really is kind of a stupid dangerous day, particularly on the Internet. Because there's so much phony stuff on the Internet as it is every day. of the year. Yeah. Did you get fooled by anything yesterday? No, I didn't get fooled.

Yeah. I've been fooled in the past. I mean, you know, but I didn't get fooled. Back in the old days in the newsroom, when we had, like, you know, landline telephones, you leave, you would leave a message on someone's desk saying a Mr. Lyon called L-Y-O-N, and then the number would be. a Baltimore Zoo. So they would call the Baltimore Zoo and say, it's Mr. Lion there.

It's so dumb, but that's kind of funny, too. Mr. Lion called you call. Yeah, Baltimore Zoo, what can I do for you? It's too bad you couldn't get a direct line straight to the lion cages. Wow. Yeah, I don't, I mean, my father used to love April Fool's Day with us. He'd come up with something every year. And I think I've told this story before, but I, I, I, I, one year got the kids with the back, the door in the basement being opened.

And I put, my, my, my wife was in the bathroom making noises in the bathroom. And I said that, you know, basically I captured, you know, I'm not sure what it was. I think it was a raccoon or something. And it's in the bathroom. What are we going to do? And they all came down and they were terrified. But, yeah. So speaking of Kirk Cousins,

Kirk has landed in Las Vegas with the Raiders. According to Schefter, he's signing a deal that looks huge in aggregate, but really it's a one-year deal for $20 million. I think the team's got a second-year option if they want to keep Kirk. But he's reunited with Clint Kubiak, who was the O.C. in Seattle this past season, but was Kirk's offensive coordinator for a year in Minnesota, and was his quarterback's coach for two years in Minnesota, and the two of them have a very good relationship. And Clint Kubiak actually said recently that for a rookie quarterback, like Mendoza,

who they're expected to take at number one overall, it's best if that quarterback doesn't start from day one. In a perfect world, you'd love him, he said, quote, to be able to learn behind somebody. And that somebody is somebody that he's been compared to, Mendoza has been. You know, the comparisons aren't necessarily size-wise because Mendoza's 6-5-66, but the two of them play similarly, especially when it comes to their accurate passing. Kirk's been a very accurate passer. throughout his career, and Mendoza's accuracy is off the charts. So I can't imagine personally that Kirk would take that gig without understanding that he's going to start this season

in a starting role for the Raiders. Now, how long that lasts will probably be determined by how well he plays. But good for him. It's a good spot. You know, I thought there was a chance in Arizona. I thought there was a chance potentially in Pittsburgh, even with the Jets before they made a move. But I think this is a good spot and look at 37 years old.

I think he'd be a tremendous mentor. He's perfect in the locker room. He wants to start. And based on the way he played last year, he can start for a lot of teams in this league. And I think he'll get the opportunity to do it initially in Vegas where they've got a lot of pitch. in this upcoming draft, and they've got one of the best young tight ends in Brock Bowers in the league

and a very talented running back in Ashton Genty, and they signed Tyler Lindervam, and they've got some good defensive talent as well. But I'm happy for him. I knew when I had him on, I don't know, a month ago, month and a half ago, because we talked for a while after we recorded what you guys heard of him. I knew he wanted to play. I knew he thought he he could play another year or two and be a starter. It didn't materialize in terms of a place in which he could go to be a definitive starter, but this is a pretty good spot. I can't imagine he's going there without an understanding that they're going to let Mendoza

sit and watch at least for a while. Ben Standig tweeted this, which I thought was interesting, about the Kirk Cousins to Raiders fallout. quote, you have to believe the Raiders told Cousins they plan on sitting Mendoza for some, if not most of his rookie season. Yeah. The second thing they tweeted that Camp Cousins must have heard that Rogers is 100% back with the Steelers. Yeah. And then the last is funny.

Cousins living in Sin City is a hoot. Yeah. He's not going to be, let me just put it this way. I don't think that the spearment rhinos, you know, in trouble of Kirk spending a lot of money or any of the casinos. But I'm happy for him. I think it's a good spot. He is at that point in his career where, yes, he is still one of the best, you know, 32 quarterbacks in the NFL and should start somewhere. He played well when he came in for Pennix last year in Atlanta, and they won a bunch of games.

and we're, you know, very close to winning that division and making the postseason. And, you know, Clint Kubiak is one of those guys that just really gelled well with Kirk when he was the O.C. In Minnesota. How about the news that Puka Nukuwa is entering rehab? We've got a lot of rehab talk this week with Tiger in rehab and now Puka Nakuwa in rehab as. as well. You know, there was, there, there's been allegations about him. There's a lawsuit filed against him right now, citing gender violence, assault and battery, and negligence, and that this is, you know, all the result of perhaps alcohol and an alcohol problem. I'll tell you this, man,

hopefully he gets help and gets what he needs, because he is one unbelievable NFL receiver. I mean, this guy was a fifth round pick in 2023, and last year he caught 129 passes for 1,715 yards and 10 touchdowns. I mean, he has become truly an elite wide receiver in the league. Yeah, so Nats home opener tomorrow, you'll be there, right? Yes, Nats against the Dodgers, the return of Stan Katz. with all its World Series rings. Yeah. It's a great home opener, and the Nats have played really well to start the season.

Yes, they have. Since the three-in-one start. Yeah. They look good. They played the Phillies tough. Really? You know, in the games that they lost, and, but these are the Dodgers.

They're the king of baseball. Yeah. Cavali really pitched well yesterday in the 6-to-5 loss in 10 innings. He pitched six complete innings, five hits allowed, just one earned run in the game. And the net- He's the real deal. Yeah. He's for real. He's healthy.

Their two losses to the Phillies were both by one run. I mean, you know, it's early, very early. Nothing tells you more about what teams really are than 162 baseball games. By the end of that, you know who the best teams are for sure. It doesn't mean anything when you. get to the postseason and all of a sudden you're in a best of five and then a best of seven. But it is the biggest certainly tell on teams when you play that many games. By the way, look at this, Tommy.

The Wizards put out an apology for what they did last night with the April Fool's promotion. Here it is on Twitter. they put out a tweet saying, we apologize for last night's April Fool's joke that left many wondering if we had misled a fan. The skit involving our mascot and other members of our performance team was scripted and intended to celebrate the day.

All participants were in on the joke, but we missed the mark. Yes, they did. I guess. All right. Do you have anything else? I know you've got to run and I've got to run. What else you got?

Got nothing else for you today, boss. All right. Back tomorrow, everybody.