The Lazy Genius Podcast - #170 - How to Lazy Genius Anything

Episode Date: August 10, 2020

I get messages all the time asking how a person can lazy genius their laundry pile or an awkward friendship encounter or online school or any number of things! The truth is that any challenge could use a Lazy Genius solution, and that’s why I wrote The Lazy Genius Way! Helpful Companion Links Preorder The Lazy Genius Way before midnight tonight (Monday) to claim your preorder bonuses! Missed the episode on How to Go Back to School? Catch up here. Details on opening and closing ceremonies and what they can be for you and your family. Download a transcript of this episode! This podcast is hosted by Kendra Adachi and executive produced by Kendra Adachi, Jenna Fischer and Angela Kinsey. To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Amazon presents Laura versus Fruitflies. Swarming your fruit and terrorizing your kitchen. These little freaks multiply at a rate that would make a rabbit say, yo. Chill. But Laura shopped on Amazon and saved on cleaning spray, countertop wipes, and fly traps. Hey, fruit flies, your baby boom ends here. Save the Everyday with Amazon. Hey there, you're listening to the lazy genius podcast. I'm Kendra and I'm here to help you be a genius

about the things that matter and lazy about the things that don't. Today's episode 170, how to lazy genius anything. I get messages all the time asking how a person can lazy genius their laundry pile or an awkward friendship encounter or online school or any number of things. The truth is that any challenge could use a lazy genius solution. And that's why I wrote The Lazy Genius Way. Tomorrow. Tomorrow. My book enters the world for real and it's so very exciting. There's actually a bonus episode here on this show with my Lazy Genius Muse, Aaron H. Moon, tomorrow. So like on launch day, which is so exciting in this feed. And then I'll also be on tomorrow's episode of the next right thing with our favorite Emily P. Freeman. Lots of celebrating to be had. But today, I wanted to actually

paint a picture of how you can lazy genius anything with the principles in the lazy genius way. So let's jump in. The problem with most solutions, especially ones that we find in the majority of like self-help and productivity spaces, is that the approach is not personal, versatile or even applicable. Frankly, it's like, it's really hard to speak about productivity without hacks. It's really hard to speak about self-help without formulas and approaches. You can't sell books without something concrete for a reader to hang her hat on, right? But if an approach isn't personal, it's not for us. If it's not versatile, it won't change with us. and if it's not applicable, it's definitely not going to help us because we can't do anything with it, right?

That's why I love the lazy genius way so much. It's personal. It's versatile and it's applicable. The principles are not rules or hacks. They're principles that are personal and customizable to you. And because they're not connected to a specific task or life stage, you can use them in any time of life. truly, they are versatile as the day as long. And they are 100% applicable because every single one can be put into action right now with any challenge you throw at it. Like for real, I've been talking to lots of folks over the last few weeks about how to lazy genius something specific in their lives, like on podcasts and stuff. And the principles have never come up dry. They've always worked. They've always, they've always offered help and truth and tangible next steps. It's not just like,

think about it this way and then everything will be fine. Like sometimes you think about it a certain way and everything is fine. But also you need some steps, right? You need system and soul. So it just really, really works. All right. So how do you lazy genius anything? What's our order here? You start with the challenge, right? What in your life needs a solution? What's frustrating or causing a problem? What do you want to change? Then you ask one simple question. What? matters. What about this situation matters? And then after you've named that, you run through the principles and you see which ones have something to offer. It's that simple. So, all right, for the sake of practice, let me walk through my own challenge and lazy genius it. Okay.

All right. First, the challenge. My challenge for the moment is that I don't feel like I can plan or prepare for anything right now, like good or bad. School starts next week. And we're doing a hybrid school year where kids go to class some days and they stay home other days. I don't know how long that's going to last. I don't know how we're going to handle it. And I don't know how I'm going to work when my kids are home, like a good bit at a time. In, you know, in late spring when we did online school, my husband was working from home since he's a school counselor. And so he was more flexible in his hours and we, you know, we made it work. He's already back at work now. Like, he's back in the office at school. So I have to figure this out. And I don't mean that

into like he's hands off. I just mean I'm the one at home. He has to go into an office. I don't, right? But it's hard to even know like what I'm trying to figure out, you know. P.S. I did an episode two weeks ago, two weeks ago on what we're attempting to figure out about school and how we can all try and make choices about school with a lazy genius mindset. But yeah, it's like really hard. That is episode 168, by the way. Okay. So also, it's almost the start of fall. For me, the start of the school year, it feels like it kind of is like, okay, it's fall now, even though it's still hot and pools are open for a few more weeks. And while I, I actually tend to be more or less okay during the holidays because of the holiday docket.

which we'll just pause for a quick second, because this is important timing-wise. If you're listening to this episode on the day it releases on Monday, August 10th, today is the very last day, the last day to get your free pre-order bonuses for buying my book before tomorrow, August 11th. August 11th is the release day. This podcast is coming out on the 10th. And those pre-order bonuses include the holiday docket. The holiday docket. The holiday docket. is the lazy genius guide to celebrating well. It's a way to get a handle on the holidays and like all the craziness that fall usually brings. So you actually enjoy the season and you aren't secretly glad when it's all over. But even with that, even with the holiday docket, we still don't know what the holidays will bring.

Right. I am barely understanding one week to the next. Things change like so quickly. And then they don't change at all. It's just very complicated and weird. It's like we live the same day. but every day feels different. Like it's really weird. So I can't plan for fall or the holidays because who in the world knows what to expect. I don't feel like I can plan the fun things either or that I know how to even prepare for the hard things for the challenging things. So like that's my challenge.

That's where I am. I can't plan for anything. I feel like I cannot plan for anything. Good or bad. Now that's how it feels. And that feeling is really difficult to care. So what do I do next? What comes next? I need to name what matters. What matters about this season? What matters about how I make decisions this season? What matters about how my family feels about this season? What matters about my mental health as it relates to this challenge of not being able to approach time the way I normally do? So when I was putting this episode together to come up with the talking points and stuff,

I sat for a long time with this particular part. It was really hard to figure out what mattered. I sat for a really long time. And I share that to remind you that it's okay if you don't know right away. It's okay if you have so many things that could matter that you feel a little paralyzed with how to look at a situation. some situations are so big and broad that you can't really put this kind of question on them with like a lot of success anyway and that's what I found for my own challenge so because honestly like

the challenge of you know I don't get to plan and I don't know what to do about it it was just too big it was too big for an answer but it's also too big to let it stick around without addressing it because it feels really heavy. It feels really big. So if you feel the same way that your challenge is too big or the answer to what matters feels like way too much to even try and find an answer to start small. Make things smaller. Okay. Start small as a lazy genius principle in the book, by the way. And it is very, very important to living like a lazy genius. So that's what I did with mine. I need to make my challenge smaller so that I can actually lazy genius it. So in terms of the components of it all, you know, the challenge of school feels like it'll find its way because it's going to have to.

It's every day, right? Like just when the lockdown started and kids came home, you know, back in March, you guys, it's been since March, like March. But we kind of figured it out. Like it was hard and we changed our approaches throughout and got frustrated by some things. But it wasn't like we could forget about doing school. You know, like we figured it out. Now, I definitely don't want to be like a fly about it seat in my pants with all of it, which is why I recorded episode 168 about how to deal with going back to school. But that feels like that entire section of my stress, of my challenge, it can kind of fall by

the wayside, right? We don't need to keep that part of things right now. So another component of that stress is the actual planning. I love a good plan. If you are new here, welcome. I plan things. But by the middle of September, for me, like, my calendar's pretty locked in with, like, all the holiday things I want us to do.

Plus, like, soccer practice schedule. That's a hard thing to say at one time. All the practices for soccer practice have been released, right? we've gotten the dates for like the kids winter performance at school, all that stuff. So basically a majority of the big things that will go on the calendar for the fall in normal times will have already made it there. But obviously that's not happening this year. And I can actually see that as a good thing. It's like a benefit to my challenge. I can't plan anything. That's how it feels. But there's also way less to plan.

there won't be soccer practice. There won't be school plays. There won't be our favorite downtown winter festival that we've gone to every year since I can remember. If you're like me, maybe you're freaking out about the inability to plan, forgetting that it's okay because there's a lot less to plan. Anyway, you know, it's not like our calendars got shaken into the air, like, you know, like they're a dirty picnic blanket that you're shaking dirt off of. And like all of our appointments are flying into the air and we have to catch them. Like I think that's what I've been internalizing with planning. That's what I've been feeling. But that's not the reality. The reality is it's okay that I can't plan because there just isn't as much to plan. There's not as

much to catch. There's just less to deal with. Right. So that leaves me with the third thing. The holiday traditions and the fun stuff. Really, once I have stripped away what's less essential to this challenge. I am left with the thing that actually is making me really, really sad, that our holiday traditions will look really different this year. And I'm sad about it. You know, I packed on the other stressors, like into the same space. But really, if I were to think through that loss, like a lazy genius, the other stuff would feel less stressful. The other stuff really isn't the most stressful thing at all. It's the sadness of like, the holiday is looking different. All right. So let's just take a quick time out and talk about what just

happened. You lazy genius anything by naming your challenge, right? And then you name what matters, and then you apply principles. I actually had to apply two principles to help me name what matters. Those two principles were start small and essentialize. I realized it was all too big and I had to make it smaller. Then I had to use essentialization. Can we say that to actually help me do that to make it smaller? I had to like, no, that doesn't matter as much. That's not as essential. That doesn't matter as much. That's not as essential. The more you use these principles, the more you will see them and you will continue to use these principles. It's just a matter of taking the time to think about them. I have the built-in reflection time of creating podcast episodes. So like I have to figure this stuff out

because it's content for you. Like I have to say words about things. I have to say words about how we're going to lazy genius certain things. But this is what's actually happening in figuring out this problem for myself. I had to go through the process. I had to apply some principles. And guess what? I've discovered what really does matter because I stripped away everything that doesn't. In the process of creating this episode. So holiday traditions matter to me. My family having our regular opening and closing ceremonies from September to December, it is something that I hold close and love and I've been quietly grieving that loss without acknowledging it. Now two things from this. One, grieving the loss of something is important. A lot of what we normally do, we won't be able to do,

right that's just true about our current situation and i want to give some space some space for myself to grieve that that is a kindness that i can show myself which is another lacy genius principle be kind to yourself the second thing is that i don't have to assume that just because one thing won't work that all of it won't right just because the winter festival is canceled doesn't mean we can't something wintery when we normally would. We just won't be able to celebrate everything in the season the way we normally do. It's not going to be normal, right? But once I peel back all the noise of what doesn't matter, of what really isn't essential,

I am able to see what matters to me. And that is our families opening and closing ceremonies and celebration of this season, however that might look. And guess what? Now I get to be a genius about it. now I get to use the principles to create an intention around that. Now I know where to put my energy and my creativity and where specifically to apply the principles. And you know what's cool? When I started thinking through this episode, like I was kind of bummed, you know,

this is a really exciting episode in some ways because it is technically the book launch episode, right? I wrote a book. And it's, comes out tomorrow. Like into the world. It's amazing. But as I went through this particular challenge, I was really down. I felt like there was so much to carry. You know, it was so heavy. It was so impossible to figure out. But now I feel excited. I know what to be a genius about. I know what doesn't matter. I named the problem. I couldn't name what mattered about it. So I made it small. I made it smaller by pulling away what was not essential. And now I know what to be a genius about. And I'm excited because I can apply some creativity and fun to our opening and closing ceremonies now that I know

that that's the one thing that feels the most important. Want to go electric without sacrificing fun? That's the Volkswagen ID4. All electric and thoughtfully designed to elevate your modern lifestyle. The Volkswagen ID4 is fun to drive with instant acceleration that makes sense. city streets feel like open roads, plus a refined interior with innovative technology always at your fingertips. The all-electric ID4. You deserve more fun. Visit vW.ca to learn more. SUVW, German engineered for all. There's something else here now, something new. From exclusively on Paramount Plus, it's the series Stephen King calls Scarious Hell.

Everything here is impossible, but it's also real. sci-fi vision calls it the best show streaming right now we're running out of time and we still don't know the rules don't miss what the movie blog calls something you need to watch saving those children is how we all go home from binge all episodes exclusively on paramount plus awe isn't something we need to travel for it's something waiting for us in everyday life

whether in a city street or a moment with a work of art I'm dacre Keltoner host of the Science of Happiness podcast Join me for Cities of Aw, a special series on how our public spaces can spark awe, wonder, and enhance the quality of public life. You can find us wherever you listen to your podcasts. Another principle in the book is to build the right routines. And in that chapter, I talk about the concept of starting with the one thing that will make everything else, like more or less unimportant as long as that one thing happens. that is a concept in a book called The One Thing, which I reference in my book as well. And I feel like I have found my one thing here.

Like this isn't a routine, obviously, but the concept of focusing on one super important thing, it works so well here. By spending time being a genius about these opening and closing ceremonies and what happens in between them, you know, the other stuff, the school crazy, the calendar crazy, the mental crazy, all of that feels less crazy. Because now I know what matters. There's another principle called go in the right order. And the three steps for going in the right order on anything at all, it's number one, name what matters. Number two, calm the crazy. And number three, trust yourself. Now we just did the first two. And now I am very much going to

trust myself in moving forward with this focus. on the ceremonies and the celebrations. And I'm pumped. Like, I just love it when the principals, like, play so well together. It's really fun. And also going back to the school craziness of like, school's going to happen. We're going to figure it out. We have to do it every day. Like, it's going to get figured out. I think that what is so important about naming the importance of these ceremonies and celebrations is if we don't plan those things, they don't happen. Right? They don't happen. I don't want that to be the case. school's going to happen because it's mandated.

And even if we do it in like the laziest most annoying way ever, it's still going to happen. But if I ignore, if I don't make my ceremonies and celebrations happen, they won't happen. So it's beautiful that I'm actually taking my energy to put it into something that really does matter and needs me in many ways in order to happen. Okay. So as we finish up, let's apply. a couple more principles to my family's ceremonies and celebrations. And you can just kind of see how you can do this same process too for whatever it is. You're wanting to lazy genius. Okay. So basically, like once you know what matters, I want you to just sort of scan the principles in the book and see what comes to mind. The first principle that comes to mind for me,

for this particular challenge, is to live in your season. This is a very upside down, unknown season. And so trying to cram it into the shape of a normal fall and holiday season will make me very frustrated, right? So that's really a very important perspective to be reminded of as I try in lazy geniuses. I need to live in the season. It's okay that this looks different. It's okay. I can't try and force it into the same shape as a normal year. I just can't. That is wasting my energy. That is trying to be a genius about something that doesn't matter. And I'm just going to be tired and annoyed, which I don't want to be. So seasons always have something to teach us, even hard ones, which stinks. But also we can learn from them, right? The second principle that comes

to mind is to essentialize. We already mentioned that a little bit. But specifically for this, what matters most about these ceremonies and celebrations, and then what is essential to making those happen? What matters most is that we do something and that we involve other people as often as we can. And that actually involves two principles themselves. We want to just do something, anything, any simple marker. That principle, start small. I don't have to have elaborate ceremonies or celebrations. Small is very much okay. And the second principle that brings up is to let people in. We trick or treat with family. Last year we did like an indoor trick or treating thing with friends because there was a tornado warning on Halloween night, which is we were on. We do that winter

festival I mentioned with friends. We obviously do like so much stuff with family over the holidays. This time of year is like really perfect for people. You know, it's really lovely. However, We're social distancing. We're wearing masks. Things are unsure. So rather than throwing the baby out with the bathwater and going all or nothing, no, no, no, we don't want to do that. Let's think about how to let people into these ceremonies and celebrations that are safe,

you know, that makes sense with the season that we're in. We can still do things together. We just have to be thoughtful about it. So as I think through like what our ceremonies and celebrations can look like this season, which I won't do right now. I will do that with my family, not here on Mike. But I have guiding principles now. I need to remember to live in the season. I need to remember to essentialize to only keep what is supporting what really matters. I want to start small and we're going to let people in. And I know that this is going to work because I have named what

matters. Remember, I started with the big giant challenge of not being able to plan anything, but as I kept asking myself the questions and applying the principles, I've landed on what really does matters. We're going to mark this time. We are going to celebrate. We just have to be a little creative doing it. But coming up with that kind of thing, it will actually be fun. You know, I can even look stuff up on Pinterest or get ideas from other places because I know what matters now. I know what I'm looking for. I'm keeping these principles as kind of my guiding light, which will make it much easier to pass over ideas that I know won't work because I know that they will not support what matters. Choose what matters and then choose things that support that. Start small. Live in your season. Let people in.

and I think you'll find yourself like I am, like feeling kind of excited about what's coming and thinking through it in ways that we would never have otherwise. And that's how you lazy jean is anything. Now, okay, obviously, I would love for you to get this book. I believe in it so much. I believe that it is truly transformative for a lifetime because these principles can apply to anything you throw at them at any time.

So the book releases tomorrow, August 11th. And again, today is the very, very last day that you can pre-order the book and get the entire lazy genius digital library for free. But I just want to say, too, that like I understand that, you know, not everyone can buy a book, get it from your library, you know, like request it from your library. this is not, I don't share these episodes and talk about the book, like, for the sole purpose of like, you need to buy this book. I wouldn't ask you to buy this book if I didn't believe in it.

Honestly, I would sort of just like, I would do the bare minimum and move on. But I believe in this book, I think more than anything I've ever created ever. Yeah, I think that's probably fair. That's fair statement. So I really, really encourage you to read it however you can. we've got the case bound like hardback it doesn't have a jacket it's like where the art is printed on it you know we did that on purpose so that uh this is a reference that you're going to highlight and you're going to flip through a lot and i don't want your cover to be like tattered and ruined so we've got a really sturdy cover there's obviously the like the kindle version and we have an audio book too that

I read so we have multiple ways that you can engage with the lazy genius way um But I am asking you to engage in it, not for my own sake, but truly for yours. And not in a, like, patronizing way. Like, I really, really believe in this message. It's transformed my life. And I believe it will yours too. So I hope that if you have not preordered already and you have any desire to, I just want to encourage you to do it today if you're listening on Monday the 10th because of these bonuses. Like, goodness gracious, this is never going to be a thing again where you get all of these for free. So, okay. So as we finish, um, I, um, I'm, I, okay, if you have already, if you already know about what's in the library, if you've already

pre-ordered, I love you, thank you. I am going to now talk about the library in detail for those who don't know about what's in it. So you can go ahead and stop this episode and move on to something else if you want. You won't miss anything. I love you by. Okay, so the library, if you're new to the stuff, what's in the digital library? There are four digital resources in this library. and I sell them all individually throughout the year at different times. And altogether they cost $112 when they're not free. But they're free for today, just for today. One more day.

Okay, now listen, this is super, super important. You pre-order the book, right? So the physical one, again, I recommend that just because I think you're going to want to highlight it and go back to it. But you do you, of course, whatever you need, the Kindle or the audiobook. All of those forms count for pre-order. So you pre-order the book, but then you have to go to the lazy genius collective.com slash book to claim your pre-order bonuses.

Basically, we have no way of knowing that you ordered until you tell us. Amazon and your local bookstore and wherever else, it won't be able to get you that digital library. We do that, but you have to tell us first. So you'll pre-order the book and then you will go to the lazy genius collective.com slash book. And in there's like a form in there

and you will enter your email address and your order information like your order number, your like where you bought it from and the day you bought it and that kind of stuff. And then we will send you the digital library. Okay.

Okay. So what are the four resources in this library? The first one is called the swap the lazy genius guide to decluttering for life. Basically decluttering, it does not have to be so intense. We need a path through our stuff for sure, but we need a path that does not involve giant black trash bags that we pull out because we want to burn everything down. And instead we just throw everything away because arson is dangerous. But then somehow we're back in the same place six months later, right? So the swap is a mindset with a lot of practical steps to help you become a lifelong

declutterer. The second is called the meal plan, the lazy genius guide to happy dinners at home. I love meal planning. I love it. It just gives me so much brain space and like freedom in my life. And this resource, it has sheets that you can print out and fill out if you want. You don't have to. But it's basically, again, a path through all the tools that I use in conjunction with each other to get dinner on the table in the happiest way possible. So brainless crowd pleasers, building your own meal matrix. There's even a step by step guide on how to do a monthly meal plan that does not make you feel like a crazy person robot. It's such a solid resource with like options for you, things that you can do or not do to keep that is what an option is, Kendra, to keep like all of your

meal planning decisions in one place so that you can decide some stuff about dinner once and then walk away. The third thing is called the holiday docket. Okay, I'm going to pause really quick. I feel bad about saying about bad mouthing myself about the option thing. I'm going to be kind to myself. I was clarifying what an option is. I'm just saying words. We're all going to do better at that, right? We're all going to be kind to true ourselves

and not beat ourselves up over stupid things. Okay. The third thing is called the holiday docket, the lazy genius guide to celebrating well, which I mentioned before. It is, again, it's a guide. It's a step-by-step guide. You can fill it out and answer questions

and name what matters, and it's that kind of guide to help you figure out what matters about the busy holiday season and how to enjoy it. rather than be glad when it's over. And the fourth one is a brand new item that has not been sold yet called the Clean Slate, the lazy genius guide to keeping your home. I'm pretty sure it's like the prettiest one of the four. It is like so pretty. It is again a step-by-step guide on how to

approach cleaning your home. It does not involve complicated routines or long lists of tasks or other things to make you feel guilty. There are some ideas, sure, but there are small steps that you can take that make big impact on how your home feels. But all of it is customizable to you. Like, we need guides and ways of being that are personal and versatile and applicable, like I said before. And all four of these resources are that. The book is that and these resources are that. And you get these resources for free, for free. Immediately. after you claim the bonuses, if you pre-order the Lacey Genius Way today, Monday, August 10th. And then don't forget, of course, after you pre-order, you have to go tap us on the shoulder and tell

us you did it at the Lazy Genius Collective.com slash book. I don't want you to pre-order and they be like, where are my bonuses? And we have to be like, you didn't claim them. And now the machine is turned off and we can't, you know. So I really, really want to like make it very, very clear that after you pre-order, you have to go claim them. Tell us that you did it. because I want you to get these resources so very much. Okay. And that's the deal with that. Shall we be done for today? Shall we do it? We're done. I'm so glad you're here. I'm so glad you listened. It just means the world that you would spend your time with me and with this podcast. And if you have bought the book, if you're still here, thank you from the very bottom of my incredibly grateful heart.

This is a really special day. And you all are the reason for that. So I just genuinely appreciate you so much. All right, that's it for today. Until next time, be a genius about the things that matter and lazy about the things that don't. I'm Kendra. I'll see you next week. Have you ever felt like you were living just a B or B plus life? It's so dangerous to live that. More dangerous than a B minus or a C plus life?

Because when you're living a B or B plus life, you don't change it. You think it's good enough. Is it? I'm Susie Welch. I host a podcast called Becoming You. People think, okay, an A plus life is not a. available to me, but there is a way. We are all in the process of becoming ourselves. Listen to becoming you wherever you get your podcasts.