The Lazy Genius Podcast - #233 - Three Things to Continue Racial Peacemaking

Episode Date: October 25, 2021

When it comes to this episode, I will not speak any of these words as some kind of social or racial justice expert. But I’m learning and want to keep learning, and based on the communication I’ve gotten from so many of you in recent months, you feel the same way. So today, I want to share with you three small things that have made a big difference in my own process that I’m asking you to do over the next few weeks.   Helpful Companion Links The White-Savior Industrial Complex by Teju Cole for The Atlantic I’ll share some of my favorite follows on Instagram this week @thelazygenius Dear White Peacemakers by Osheta Moore (follow her on Insta @oshetamoore) 30 Days to Being Actively Anti-Racist on Social Media by Deidra Riggs (follow her on Insta @deidrariggs) Share your experience with me whenever you’d like by emailing [e-mail]. Download a transcript of this episode.   This podcast is hosted by Kendra Adachi and executive produced by Kendra Adachi, Jenna Fischer and Angela Kinsey. To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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You're listening to The Lazy Genius podcast. I'm Kendra Adachi, and I'm here to help you be a genius about the things that matter and lazy about the things that don't. Today is episode 233. Three Things to Continue Racial peacemaking. I would like to acknowledge something that might be obvious, but is also very important for this episode. I'm a white woman. My experience as a person in North Carolina, where I've lived my entire life, is as a white woman. I'm married to a Japanese man and I have three mixed race kids. But the privilege that I have experienced and the system I live in, it benefits me as a white woman. Even growing up poor, the system still benefited me because I was white. And as a white person, I am going to live the rest of my life, unlearning, re-learning, and doing my small part to contribute to the work of making this country more equitable and replacing harmful systems with more loving and just ones. But I think until people with privilege, like me, acknowledge that they have that privilege,

it's going to take us longer to get there. So when it comes to this episode, I will not speak any of these words as some kind of of social or racial justice expert. I am not one. In fact, I feel a lot of nerves speaking into this at all because I'm not an expert. But I'm learning and I want to keep learning. And based on the communication I've gotten from so many of you in recent months, you feel the same way. Now, first I want to share just a quick word about how this episode came to be. So my team was talking about episode ideas, you know. And Latoya, our lazy genius community manager and a black woman suggested that I'd do something about anti-racism. She observed that while there was a lot of

important talk around the subject last spring after George Floyd was murdered, including from this very podcast, that it was less common to see white people speaking about this when there wasn't a big news story. And she's absolutely right. And even as I was processing the episode with Latoya, I said something like, yes, it's so important to talk about this when there isn't some sort of crisis happening. You're right. And she kindly and lovingly responded by saying, well, it's important to acknowledge that the black community is always in crisis and that there are things that happen all the time that just don't get reported in the news. So, you know, be aware of that language. And again, she's absolutely right. Because of course she is. My perspective is limited because I'm white.

and I'm learning all the time how to take part in this work in a way that honors the BIPAC experience. So one of the questions that I've often had myself as a white person that I've heard other white people say is, what do I do? Sometimes that is said in like a helpless way because there is so much to be done, you know, so many big rocks to move that my tiny contribution can't possibly make a difference. And then sometimes the what do I do is said with like zeal. and initiative and like put me on the front lines, where are we going? Now the first perspective, at least for me, it keeps me from moving. We talk about starting small a lot around here. And so often it's the most annoying advice ever because starting small, these small moves,

they feel like you're not going anywhere. They're not doing anything. If I follow more Bipot creators on Instagram, for example, is that really going to make a difference? You know, That hesitancy of where these choices make any difference, that hesitancy, it sometimes morphs into stopping altogether and not doing anything. And then on the other side, the zeal can very quickly morph, again, at least for me, into being a white savior. Ted Ju Cole, he coined this phrase in 2012 on Twitter, the phrase white savior industrial complex. And then he subsubesely, In subsequently in an article, he wrote for The Atlantic, like broadened it out. I will link that in the show notes. But there is this idea that white people are the fixers. It is up to us to save BIPAC communities in a way that still benefits us, though. It makes us feel good. It gives us a claim. We're doing a good thing. But the reality is that seeing white people as the one who hold the key, I mean, that's a deeply, deeply harmful mindset. right and it perpetuates the idea of white supremacy and therefore perpetuates the systems that uphold

white supremacy too so all that to say i'm a white woman who wants a better world i am a white woman who is confronting my own biases and contributions to an unjust culture i'm a white woman who has a lot of people who listen to what i say and when we're talking about laundry the stakes are a lot lower this, right? So in this episode, there is a very high chance that I will say something that a Bipak listener will find troubling, not because I intend to say something offensive, but because I have seen how deeply embedded my implicit biases and how easy it is for me to perpetuate a harmful system with my words, even when I don't mean to. Intention is less important to me. I'm not going to hold that very closely. Let me. Let me.

explain what I mean by that. We say that lazy geniuses are a genius about the things that matter and lazy about the things that don't, right? One thing that does not matter to me is protecting my intention. I can say something that hurts another person. And even if I didn't mean to hurt them, I still want to take responsibility for that. That happens with my kids all the time, right? something between my kids or between me and one of my kids. Just because we didn't mean to hurt someone's feelings, it doesn't mean we didn't or that we're absolved from doing it. Right.

So I'm just saying that up front that I still feel like I'm kind of walking on baby giraffe legs when I talk about racial and social justice and systemic racism because there is so much to learn more than I will ever be able to learn in my lifetime. but I want to do what I can with what I have to contribute to a more just world, despite the fear that I will do it wrong or say something the wrong way. Now, my intention matters to me, but if you are listening and you are hurt by something I say, then my intention is secondary to your interpretation. That is my posture in this.

Your interpretation of what I say, that matters to me, more than my intention in saying it. so I just want to go ahead and take responsibility for that up front. And in this conversation, I want to share with you three small things that have made a big difference in my own process that I'm asking you to do over the next few weeks. The first thing is to do a diversity audit. I would like to encourage all of us to look at our forms of entertainment, Instagram, TV, movies, podcast, books, and notice how diverse those kids. categories are. I remember back in 2020, I was confronted with how white my Instagram feed was,

like almost exclusively white people. And at first, I'll be honest, I felt performative following black and brown creators just because. But I had to tell myself that it wasn't just because I wanted and needed more diversity in my feed. I want a diversity to become my norm, not the exception. And after a year, of experiencing a diverse feed that spans a variety of topics, by the way, I have become more aware of when there isn't diversity represented. Representation has become the norm because that's what I see most often. And that is a wonderful, wonderful thing. I feel, I actually feel a similar poll in my experience with TV commercials. Now I notice when an ad is only white people. The other day, in fact,

an ad came on for a wealth management company and everyone in the in the ad was white and i asked sam my sixth grader if he noticed anything about the commercial he said he said they're all old which was not wrong even though even though there were probably like there were definitely people who were only like 50 and i'm only a decade from that so it's not really that they're old that that's not the point i pointed out that the commercial was all white people and then we talked about it um We didn't talk about just necessarily that single commercial, but kind of the wider concept. What if all wealth management commercials only had white people in them? What message does that send to different viewers?

It was a short but good conversation where we were paying attention to what is normalized. There is a chance that our forms of entertainment could use an audit. What are you seeing and hearing? and is there diversity there? Is that normal? And this isn't about just following BIPOC creators who are teaching about social justice or inclusivity or peacemaking outright, like that that's their whole platform. Those follows are good and important. But also, what about just people of color like live in life, go on a vacation, making dinner, teaching you about budgeting and home design and how to run a business? Now, this is a hard thing for me to say. But there is an assumption in our culture in the system

that white people are smarter, that they know more, that they are the expert, that they are the fixers of the things. And that is not only completely and inherently false, but that thinking also perpetuates the hierarchical inequitable system we're currently in. Now, you might not realize that you have an implicit bias that white people are smarter than people of color, but I am going to be completely honest and say that I did. I didn't even realize it was there until I did an Instagram diversity audit last year. Why on earth would I not follow more Bipot creators? I honestly didn't know the answer. I was kind of confused. It was like, why are all these white people here? And after some thought, I realized that there was something

invisible but very present in me that assumed I couldn't learn as much from people of color. And when I unearthed that, that implicit bias, I was horrified and angry at myself. I am deeply embarrassed to say it now. But this is the kind of work we can do individually as white people to contribute to change. We can confront these uncomfortable things. We've grown up believing. even layers and layers of things beneath the surface that we don't even realize we're there and move in a different direction.

I'll be sharing a lot of favorite Instagram follows and authors and all the things on Instagram this week. So be sure you're following along at The Lazy Genius. But I know that one area where I desire greater diversity is in the podcast I listen to. I just scrolled through my Overcast app, which is how I listen to podcast. and every single show that I subscribe to is hosted by a white person. Now, sometimes those white hosts have Bipod guests, but wow, I didn't know that. I don't want my podcast experience to be like that.

And I didn't even realize it was until I looked. So that's all I'm asking of you. Just look. Look at your Instagram feed, your podcast app, your Netflix queue, your bookshelf, and just observe what do you see? and then ask yourself why it might be that way and then seek diversity. Not just to be a good person or to say that you have a diverse feed, but to engage in the stories and joy and experiences of Bipot creators and communities to experience the world in a different

way to see through someone else's eyes. Entertainment can very quickly become an echo chamber. If you think about it, that's how the system is built, right? That's what an algorithm is. You like this? How about this? And then you get more of the same. So we have to be intentional about making sure that we consume something that is representative of the world around us, not just our own specific bubble. Plus, it's more fun that way. We'll be right back. Need a vehicle that isn't afraid to make a splash? That's the Volkswagen Tauce. Capable and confident. the Volkswagen Taos is fit for everyday life,

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The second thing is to read the book, Dear White Peacemakers by Oshita Moore. Oshita is a black woman who is a writer and a speaker and a pastor. And she is doing the singularly difficult work of teaching and loving white people as they learn and unlearn racial biases inherent in living in a culture of white supremacy. We hear a lot and understandably so that it is not the job of, the Bipot community to teach white people about racism. We can figure it out. We can do the work. And that is correct. That is correct. But Oshida feels a call to speak to white peacemakers and be a

companion as we do this work. I am so deeply humbled by her heart. So this book, Dear White Peacemakers, Dismantling Racism with Grit and Grace, is structured around the sermon on the Mount from the Bible. It's a sermon that Jesus preached early in his ministry on earth. And if you might remember, if you've been a listener for a while, it's a sermon that I wanted to pay close attention to this year, the year that I turned 40. Who knew that when I read Dear White Peacemakers that Osceita would structure this important book around that sermon? It's kind of cool. So in the book, she shares personal stories. She asks hard questions. She answers some questions that are even harder. It is unlike any book on racism I've read. And I think it is an essential read for any white person who is wanting

to do the kingdom work of bringing love, joy, and peace to a world in desperate need of it. I know that not everyone who listens to this podcast has the same faith or role view that I do. But personally, as a Jesus-loving Christian who has had a very hard time with the Christian church lately, Oshita's book is a balm. is empowering, insightful, loving, honest, and smart. And I think that it is an incredibly impactful small step that you can take. She writes this in the book, Anti-racism isn't a weekend project like cleaning the basement or hanging twinkle lights over your deck.

Anti-racism is a deeply emotional and challenging undertaking. If you do not build up practices of inner shalom, You'll put expectations on the outcome of your work that will turn your peacemaking into peacekeeping. Those are such powerful words. She impacts the difference in peacemaking and peacekeeping in the book. So important. She also says this. This is another quote from the book.

The problem with building your peacemaking on what you're against and not what you're for is that you're always prepared for a fight and always looking for an enemy. In this book, Oshita teaches white people what to be for and how to be for it. So if you haven't read it already, now is a really great time. And the third thing I'd invite you to do is to buy and read through 30 days to being actively anti-racist on social media. It is a simple, impactful little e-book created by Deidre Riggs. And it does what it says. it's 30 days where she walks you through your social media presence and engagement and how you can be more actively anti-racist there.

She helps you examine what you believe about social media, what you believe about what you post and what others post. She talks about Friday introductions, when to walk away, what it means to center yourself in posts about racial justice and so much more. What's great about it is it's literally like one short page a day. and sometimes the day is just a question to ask yourself. Like, it's just a question. But Deidre gives us a path that answers that question. What do I do? And it's a path with very small, doable steps.

Plus, Deidre is a Jedi coach, which stands for justice, equity, diversity, and inclusion. And she is my favorite person to ask me superhard questions about race. She is very, very knowledgeable and kind. in this space. I recently watched an Instagram live with her and Patty Taylor where they talked about their experience as black women, how they've lost friends from speaking out against racial injustice, how they have been mistreated in the church, and how they spend so much time considering what they're going to say because they know the consequences are so great. And in that live, Deidre said this, the reason I do it,

is because I love people. I want people to engage in this conversation. I believe all of us are hurt by oppression in this country, the oppressor, and the oppressor. And I feel that in her posts. And especially in this resource, 30 days to being actively anti-racist on social media. She cares about this topic because she cares about people. So the three things you can do now, this week, this month, depending on how fast you read. First, do a diversity audit and examine all your areas of entertainment. Second, read Dear White Peacemakers by Oshita Moore. And third, spend 30 days with Didera.

I'll put links to both Oshita and Didera in the show notes. And like I said, I'll share some like favorite follows and stuff on Instagram this week. But I want to say, this is worthy work, my friends. this is worthy work to honor the humanity in everyone and to make sure that humanity is reflected not just in our Instagram feeds but in our systems in government and education in the justice system and the grocery store in our neighborhoods and our churches but until we do small things like ask ourselves why our Instagram feeds are so white those big changes are going to happen a lot more slowly.

So these are three simple things that white people can do as we continue this lifelong work. And if you are Bipak and listen to this episode, I'm honored you're here. And I invite you to share your experience with me whenever you would like to. You can DM me on Instagram at The Lazy Genius or you can send me an email at hello

at the lazy genius collective.com. You are welcome here. You matter. And you are worth this work. Every single bit of it. So thank you for being part of this community. And that is it for today. Thanks everyone for listening.

And until next time, be a genius about the things that matter and lazy about the things that don't. I'm Kendra and I'll see you next week. Have you ever felt like you were living just a B or B plus life, it's so dangerous to live that. More dangerous than a B minus or a C plus life, because when you're living a B or B plus life, you don't change it.

You think it's good enough. Is it? I'm Susie Welch. I host a podcast called Becoming You. People think, okay, an A plus life is not available to me, but there is a way. We are all in the process of becoming ourselves. Listen to Becoming You wherever you get your podcasts.