The Lazy Genius Podcast - #327 - Lazy Genius Office Hours

Episode Date: August 14, 2023

This is the second episode of this type where I take questions you asked on Instagram and answer them on the podcast. We’ve got a handful of great ones today!   Helpful Companion Links This episode’s Office Hours Instagram post Episode 323: How to Lazy Genius a Big Change Use code LAZYGENIUS for 20% off your first Olive & June Mani System Sign up for the Latest Lazy Listens email. Grab a copy of my book The Lazy Genius Kitchen or The Lazy Genius Way! (Affiliate links) Download a transcript of this episode.   This podcast is hosted by Kendra Adachi and executive produced by Kendra Adachi, Jenna Fischer and Angela Kinsey. To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Hi there, you are listening to the lazy genius podcast. I'm Kendra Adachi and I'm here to help you be genius about the things that matter and lazy about the things that don't. Today is episode 327, Lazy Genius Office Hours. This is the second episode of this type where I take questions that you have asked on Instagram and answer them on the podcast. We've got a handful of great ones today, but a couple of thoughts before we jump into your specific questions. First thing, I responded to a lot of comments already on that Office Hour's Instagram post with the particular episode as the answer to their question. We are on our 327th episode today. So a lot of these broader topics that y'all asked about in the comments I've already covered. So if you did not

get your question answered or you are curious what was asked, a lot of the questions, they do have answers in the form of existing podcast episodes. And I put those in some of them at least in the comments. So if you want to see, my Instagram account is at the lazy genius and the photo is like a golden-hued picture of me looking into the void. There are also great ideas from the community in those comments as well where you gave each other answers and it was really great. Okay, that's the first thing. The second thing, which will almost certainly always be a thing when we do these episodes is you have to make your concern or problem smaller. There were a lot of questions about new big seasons coming and things like a better relationship with my mom

or my kid or my partner. There were questions about how too lazy genius having kids in school and having a job and getting a degree all while someone is sick, like all at the same time. Now listen, all of those things that I just said are incredibly important. You want to be aware of a new season you're in. You want good relationships. You want to navigate complicated seasons well. Of course, those things matter. But the way too lazy genius those things is to make them smaller. That is how you lazy genius them is you make them smaller. They are too big to tackle. They are too big to tend. They are too big to figure out as is. Now, I also get it. We want to figure out the big things. We want to understand all the pieces and parts that make something that's hard, not hard anymore. I get that so much.

but that is just not life. Your goal is to stay connected to yourself, to be a kind, whole person, and then figure something out one small step at a time. Now, that is not the way that most solutions are presented to us. Usually, organizational, productivity, time management experts, they give you a big system to put into place. But you are not made to manage big systems. Life does not work like that. So if you feel overwhelmed by a huge transition or a challenge in your life, make it smaller. Take a deep breath. Remember that you cannot control every aspect of your life. Take another deep breath.

And then name the thing that matters or the thing that's driving you the most crazy. And then you're going to keep making either or both of those things smaller and smaller until you have a solution you can actually do. We don't do things because they're too big. That's why things don't get fixed. Because you can't, you can't do it. That's a big problem can't be solved in one big swoop. And as humans, we can't solve them all on our own in one big swoop.

We have to make them smaller. A lifetime collection of the smallest steps, that's what actually leads to a lazy genius life. So don't dismiss those small steps. Make your problem smaller. Okay, that's the second thing. The third thing is there were a lot of questions about seasons and transitions, a lot of them. And that makes sense because of where we are right now. It's August.

There are a lot of transitions happening. So just a couple of weeks ago, we did episode 323, How Too Lazy Genius, A Big Change. I would listen to that episode through the lens of whatever big transition you're going through. I think that will really help with whatever big transition you're in. Okay, so now let's jump into today's office hours questions. Okay, so we have three questions that are kid-related and then three that are not. I'm going to start with the ones that are not so that the folks without kids who might just want to skip those questions. You can just end the episode, you know, at the halfway point if you want.

All right, first up is Rebecca K. Shelton. These are the Instagram handles from the comments. Hello, Rebecca. Rebecca writes, is it possible to go too small? No, it's not. We keep a fruit drawer in the fridge. always have lemons and limes in it with the other fruit, usually loose. We use them regularly, but not enough to buy large amounts like a bag at a time. So we often buy a couple of new ones while

we still have one to two older ones. The annoyance is that we lose track of which is the oldest when we're cooking and just want to grab a lime. What matters is using the oldest first so they don't go bad. First, it is, yeah, it's never possible to go too small. In fact, the smaller you go, the better you'll be. I love something this small. You know why? Solutions are much easier to find. I don't need to give you any paradigm shifts or perspectives or pep talks about limes. We can just solve the problem of the limes, right? So the main problem is knowing which citrus is the oldest. We want to know what to use first or what not to use first, right? Now, one idea is to put a little bin like a lidless Tupperware that's still in your drawer, even though you lost a little

long time ago. Put that in the produce drawer to be your use first produce section. Okay. Like it's still in the drawer, but it's separated, right? You could also do this in the opposite way. It might be easier to put new citrus in that little bin. And once the loose citrus in the drawer is used, you dump the bin into the drawer, leaving the bin empty for the next time you buy lemons and limes. Either way would work. Another idea, especially especially if you don't mind working around the zest of the lemon and lime, is to grab a Sharpie when you're putting away your limes and you write the date on the peel. So that way when you're digging around and you find a couple of limes with different dates,

you just grab the oldest one. There are probably a couple of other solutions to this, but see how easy it is to solve this tiny problem? This is why we love making problems smaller. Everybody, we love it. We love it. We'll be right back. Want to go electric without sacrificing fun? That's the Volkswagen ID4.

All-electric and thoughtfully designed to elevate your modern lifestyle. The Volkswagen ID-4 is fun to drive with instant acceleration that makes city streets feel like open roads. Plus a refined interior with innovative technology always at your fingertips. The all-electric ID4. You deserve more fun. Visit vw.ca to learn more. SUV-W, German engineered for all. Aw, isn't something we need to travel for. It's something waiting for us.

everyday life, whether in a city street or a moment with a work of art. I'm Dr. Keltner, host of the Science of Happiness podcast. Join me for Cities of Aw, a special series on how our public spaces can spark awe, wonder, and enhance the quality of public life. You can find us wherever you listen to your podcasts. All right. Next up is at Kelsey Damron. Kelsey writes, it may sound goofy, but how do lazy genius finding a new sitcom to watch when we finish one. The problem is that we tend to go back to our old faves, scrubs, how I met your mother, et cetera, over and over. I do know that watching shows you know can help regulate emotions, but it does get old after a while. What matters, finding a new, lighthearted 30-minute show to change up what we watch in the evenings. All right, now there were some

suggestions for Kelsey in the comments of what shows she should try. Kim's convenience is one, and that is indeed a great show. But that's not really what Kelsey. is asking here, nor is Kelsey's taste the same as every person listening right now, right? What we really want a lazy genius is how to know what to watch next, especially if you're watching a show with someone else. I used to think that the queue of my streaming service would be how I would do this, you know, just pick the next show. But that was also in the early days of Netflix when all we had was Netflix and there weren't like a billion options of premium content. There are so many shows y'all there are so many shows in uh 2021 which was two years ago there were 817,000 TV shows available on TV

and across streaming platforms. That's almost a million shows, you guys. And many of us have multiple streaming platforms. We have access to most of these things. Like it's nuts. So this is actually a very relatable problem. Now this will not work for everybody, but this is what I do. In the same way that I make a seasonal dinner queue or a smaller list of recipes that work for whatever season I'm in. I also have a very specific and short next up show queue. I have a list for myself of things I watch by myself and then one for me and cause to watch together. Whatever I see a show advertised or I notice it while we're scrolling, you know, looking for something else, or I hear about it on the podcast, something like that. And I know that that would be a fantastic show

to add for this season. I will add it to my note and my phone. I'll do the same thing for myself. But here's the thing. I only add it if it's legitimately something I would love to watch right now. It's not a list of, oh, that seems like that might be good. Or everybody's talking about this. Maybe I'll try this. No. Like that is your, that can be your Netflix queue. You know, you add whatever you want to that. This list is different. This is a list of things that are like full on enthusiasm. okay? It's like, yes, we absolutely want to watch this. We definitely want to give this a try. Now, does everything work? Is everything like, you know, a home run? No, not at all. But you won't know what you love until you, you know, you give it a chance, but give the best things for you

their best chance. Now, over the last couple of months, Kaz and I have watched the most recent season of Top Chef. We have watched Alone, the recent season of Alone, and now we just started Jerry Doody. Other shows on my list for when we were finished are The Bear and Pepsi Where's My Jet? That's it. Are there tons of shows that we would love, but we have not watched yet, like The Good Place? We've never watched it. Haven't? Maybe we will one day, but we haven't now. But you have to release the pressure that you're going to watch everything because you won't. You will die. We're all going to die before all these shows get watched. Even people, People like Knox and Jamie from the podcast who watch shows for their job will never be able

to watch everything. There's just too much. So release the pressure that you are going to be able to watch everything. You also have to release like lowercase S shame of watching a beloved show again. We, at our house, we love watching The Office and Bob's Berger's many nights. There's nothing wrong with that. so don't feel bad about making that choice. But having a tiny, tiny, tiny, tiny list of next up shows is super helpful for us.

Another small approach, especially if it is a longer series that you really loved and you felt connected to, like you started watching something and you're like, oh, we have, we have, we have gone deep into this, you know? Have like a little closing ceremony for finishing that show. Watch the final episode with, you know, fun food or like. a toast or something. Just marking it is really nice. And then you could do the same as you open a new one. Like make it just the tiniest bit special, even comically. Like it's not like a super serious thing. But that kind of makes the decision of what we're watching next. It makes it feel like

simultaneously more important and less important, like in the best way. I mean, you're just choosing a show. But really the actual show is less of the issue. Being intentional together and having fun, that's what really, really matters. I hope that helps Kelsey. Okay, our final non-kid question comes from Markella. Markella Jean. Markella, it's her last name's Parsons. Markella has been in the lazy genius community for a long time. I think her last name is Parsons. Now I'm blanking. I think it's Parsons. Anyway, Markella is lovely. Team LG loves Markella. And Markella writes, how to lazy genius finding time to do my nails. I love having them painted, but to carve out the time somehow feels overwhelming.

Again, I love how small this is. Having Painted nails is fun and important for some people, but finding the time to do it is hard. I think that is very relatable. And maybe not just for nails, but for something else that's like kind of in the beauty or self-care arena, you know, like doing a face mask regularly, something like that. Because doing your nails does take a little bit of time, especially if you want your manicure to last. It does feel hard to fit it into regular life. I get that. Chances are your regular life is already pretty full. And even if you have like chill evenings, very few of us are wandering around our homes with all this excess time on our hands. Like how am I going to fill my time? You know,

like, some people do have that, but that's just not very common. Even if you technically have like chill time, your brain does not feel that way yet. You know, you have to kind of like detox your brain. So it's not like your free time even feels that way sometimes. times. So in this case, adding something that takes a little bit of time and is outside of your regular routine like doing your nails, it does feel like a challenge. And I think the best way to add something like that to your life is to stack it on top of something that you're already doing. I have painted my nails during therapy. I see my therapist online and during many of those sessions, I do my nails. It's quite lovely actually. Maybe it's the carpal line. You have to sit

in for 45 minutes or a staff meeting where you don't have to show your face or while you're sitting with your kids while they're doing their homework. You probably need to only point when they're doing their homework, you know, like wet nails aren't going to get in the way. So first, I would look for a place where you're already doing something where doing your nails can just be added. The other thought I would like to offer is weirdly to not consider doing your nails on the weekends. I think you should pick a random day in the middle of the week and do it at night while you're watching. in your show or, you know, listening to an audiobook or something. Weekends have a lot of fresh start energy, right, where we have to get everything ready for the upcoming week. You are already

probably already planning your week, your meals, maybe doing some sort of meal prep, tiding your house, scheduling your carpools, doing your face mask, you know, checking your schedule, all kinds of things. Frankly, adding your nails to that list feels like a lot. So even though you might think the weekend is the best time, which is a lot, which is a lot, I get, you know, Sunday night seems like a great time in theory to do your nails. I think a random weekday could be better. Stick it on just like a regular night after a regular day. Weekends are highly irregular. They just are. And they're full of all that big, you know, planning energy. Whether you're doing the planning or you're feeling bad that you're not. So that could be why you're struggling to fit in

one more different thing. So do it during the weekday. For the specifics of nails, I would be remiss if I did not mention how much I love all of the June polish in their main system. I have a lot of their colors, like a lot, a lot. And if you also have an overwhelming amount of colors, no matter how many that is, do what I do and make a seasonal polish capsule. I pick about six colors for the upcoming season and I only paint from those. That way, I'm not crippled by the paralysis of choice and end up running out of time to paint because I spent so much time trying to choose, right? Okay, so that is my answer about how to lazy genius fitting nails into your life. All right, now we are into our kid-related questions. So if you do not have kids and you do not

care, love you, bye. Okay, the first one is from Kristen M. Bland. But Kristen is really the spokesperson for many comments, lots and lots of questions about this topic. Kristen wrote, packing school lunch, finding something that will be well-balanced-ish in terms of food groups, cost-effective and flexible enough to meet the ever-shifting goalposts of a second-grader's preferences while also not consuming a lot of my bandwidth. Okay, we are in the throes of transitioning to school and a new season, so of course school lunch stress is coming out. Now, when I went to answer this question, it was a very long answer. I think there is a lot to say about school lunches, so much so that we have now made it into its own episode. There is.

is a bonus episode that will come out in two days on Wednesday. It will be like a little shorter, not by a lot though. And it will be a great separate place for you to grab what you need about school lunches. But that's how big of a deal school lunches are. So look for that episode in a couple of days. Thank you for asking the question, Kristen. You are speaking for many. We'll be right back. Okay. Let's get to our actual final two kid questions that I'm going to answer. This next one is from Johanagram 24, which is fantastic. Johanagram. How to lazy genius where to take my toddler. We need to get out and decisions are hard because I get stuck with all the options, but I also want him to experience a lot of different places and environments. Okay, if you have or have ever had toddlers,

you know this feeling. Toddler season is this season. You don't mind for getting something at the grocery store because it means you have something to do the next day. Some parents are more emotionally equipped than others to be at home all day with their little kids or to easily adventure out. I was usually not one of those parents. If you do want to get out of the house with your toddler, but you get overwhelmed with the choice that is very relatable. I understand you. And I would recommend that you batch it.

That is one of the 13 lazy genius principles. We all know what batching is where you're doing the same kind of thing all at once. Okay. Here's what I would encourage you to do. You're going to sit down one time. and you're going to make a list of all the outings that you could go on. Then I would encourage you to triage that list into categories, either by the type of thing, like parks, you know, a museum, stuff with animals,

play dates, you know, whatever. You could categorize it by the energy or the time required, you know? Maybe you have day trips, quick trips, outings that are high energy or low energy, outside outings, rainy day outings, that kind of thing. By making a master list at one time that you can also add to and you get more ideas later, you make it easier to choose when it's time to choose. You're not choosing from every option ever. And you also don't have to use brain power to remember the idea that you had three weeks ago,

which happened to me all the time. I was like, wait. Oh, I had a good idea of where I could take Sam. I forgot. Oh, no. Like that is real. So make a list. Put it on the fridge or in your phone or something and then just choose.

Now, if you would like to intentionally rotate those things, you know, you can check something off when you do it or you can write the date next to the thing when you do it so that you don't repeat it too much if that matters. You can have a house rule, which is another lazy genus principle, to like not repeat until a category is done. Now, that last one is only in the case if variation is the highest priority. I would say with toddlers, it's not usually, usually with toddlers. sanity is the highest priority, but like you do you, if variation matters, and you could just rotate through the list. That's great. So I had a list like this. One of my boys were tiny. They're two years apart. And it was the best. It was the actual best. If memory serves,

my categories were parks, bakeries, and dessert places. I love a bakery. Places that they can run inside. That category include the mall. I would just let them run down the middle of the mall. They'd just toddle down. You know? It was amazing. There was a list of play date friends, like people to call. Be like, hey, do you want to need it? I need at the park. Do you want to come over? I come to your house. Whatever. There was a category of like places you had to pay for, you know, like museums, children's museums, stuff like that. Stores to browse, especially I had places that were outside of my regular food shopping rhythm, you know, like going to goodwill or something fun like the pet store or a store that I just really liked and I would put them in a

stroller and go, even toy stores, but with very clear boundaries, depending on how old your kids are, about what we could and could not get. So we have this, I live in Greensboro, North Carolina, and we have this amazing local toy store called Toys and Co. And it is so fun. They just have like, there's just toys everywhere. It's so well organized and tended to and has like really unique things, but they want you to just go play. There's stuff set up everywhere. It's so fun. It's also hard to leave without getting something, right?

So when we would go to the toy store, here's my tip, when we would go to the toy store, before we got there, I would tell the kids, and I still do this actually, and my oldest is 13. I'm like, okay, we're going to go. We're going to go play. We're going to find toys that we might want to buy for like a birthday or Christmas or something. but what we'll do is we'll get something from the bouncy ball bin before we leave the store. Okay. Those items are always less than three bucks a pop.

You know, it's like little tiny poppets and balls and, you know, just little like fidget things. And to me, that's well worth it for me to buy three, two to three dollar things from the little plastic bin to be able to take the occasional trip to the toy store where the kids are happy forever. we just are there for so long. It's just totally worth it. Okay. Also, don't sleep on making a trip to the grocery store fun for a toddler. You can look for everything that is the color blue.

You know, don't pick green or red because those colors are everywhere and you'll have to stop constantly. You can push, put your kid in the, you know, the little part of the car, the front part of the cart and then push the cart backwards so the kid feels like they're driving and leading you. That's always fun. give them light, unbreakable things to put in the cart themselves, like cereal boxes, stuff like that. Parenting a toddler requires a lot of energy, but make it easier on yourself

by using a burst of energy one time on an outing list. Categorize it based on what matters to you and then go enjoy it. Okay. One final question for today comes from Jenna L. Cook. Jenna says, this feels very specific, but how to lazy genius the last hour before kids come home from school? It seems like this is a very important time, quote unquote, but I want to do all the things, clean, prep, rest, enjoy, eat, that I end up doing nothing. I feel like I decide what matters and then I decide once is coming. Jenna is not wrong on that. All right. No matter how long your kids have been out of the house, whether it is three hours of preschool, seven hours at regular school, or four days at grandmas. The last hour before they return has the weirdest energy. It's like a

deadline. You're running out of time. And when we're running out of time, we try really hard to finish whatever was supposed to happen before the deadline. When you're dealing with a project, that's easy. A project is defined. You know what you're supposed to do. But when you're talking about a random afternoon, especially if that deadline happens three to five days a week, it doesn't need deadline energy. You don't have to give it deadline energy. So that's my first offering to you. Notice that deadline feeling and tell yourself that you're not on a deadline. We do very often feel this pressure to make every minute count, right? Especially if we have kids and they're not around. But that's just a false deadline. That's manufactured. You do not need that in your life.

Okay, my next thought is to remember that what you do one day does not have to be what you do every day. Depending on the rhythm of your week or where you are in your menstrual cycle or the weather or the mood of your kid, you might need to make one kind of decision on the Monday in that last hour before they get home. That is different than the decision that you make on that Friday. When you're thinking about this deadline hour, remember that you don't have to choose the same thing for every day. Now, if that is easier for you, then go for it. But sometimes that all or nothing pressure, it keeps us from making a decision at all, which is what Jenna said, right?

Yet another challenge with that deadline hour is that we get to it and then we feel like we have to react to it. We probably did not make a decision early on when we were calmer. So now that the last hour is here, we start to like mildly panic. If that's you, decide at the story. start of the morning, or the time, how you'll approach that deadline hour. Name it now so you don't stress about it later. Now, here's what I tend to do in that scenario, because I definitely feel the pressure of the deadline hour. I give myself a cutoff. I have to get my kids from school at 2.30

when school is in session. That's the earliest that a kid needs to be picked up. I stop doing anything productive at 2 o'clock at the latest. And for that half hour, I do what makes me feel like myself. I'll read. I will sit and listen to the birds because of course I love my birds. I will go for a walker on the block. Whatever. Maybe for you, that's when you call your sister or you do something creative with your hands. It's not that you can't be productive in the deadline hour, but I like to give myself a like a humanity cushion in there. I consider my, day over at two every single school day so that I have half an hour to just be a person and take the pressure off. And on the topic of productivity, I would ask yourself, what task would most

benefit your whole family once everyone is home? Like what could you do that actually benefits everyone when they do get there? Is it to tidy the living space? Is it having a snack ready to go? Is it having a little bit of dinner prepped so that you can focus on helping with the math homework without stressing about getting dinner made. Think about what would make that transition home work best for your whole family. And then use maybe that first half of the deadline hour for that. Right. And then the second half is for you.

Do what you can. And then stop. Then stop. A final idea here is to have theme days of how you spend that time. Maybe Monday is like errand day, Tuesday's food day. Like on a Monday, you're like, okay, I've got my last hour before I, the kids come home or I go get them. I'm going to go run these couple of errands or whatever. You know, Tuesday could be food day.

We were doing food prep stuff. Wednesday's cleaning day. Thursday's organizational day. I don't know. Friday's a rest day. I would like for you to have rest in there no matter what. But you use the time when your kids are away for specific things. Maybe not even just the deadline hour, but the whole time they're gone, depending on how long

that is. Knowing that you're going to have a break later, right? Knowing that everything has its place. Knowing that you do have a cleaning day. So you don't have to clean on the Monday because you're going to get to it on Wednesday. it's okay, right? And even if you don't get to it on Wednesday, that's also okay. Now, theme days don't usually work for me, but I know they work for a lot of people, so I want to put them out there in case, you know, it works for you. Ultimately, though,

the question to me is not what do you do during that deadline hour. It's more about how you think about it. It's not all or nothing. It does not have to be the same every day. You do not have to spend the entire deadline hour on productivity. And the deadline hour urgency has a faux urgency anyway, right? So once you keep those things in mind, the choice of what to do feels a lot easier. And that is it for today's office hours. Thank you so much for asking all your questions. All right, before we go, let's celebrate the lazy genius of the week. This week, it is Sarah Jane Nichols with a vacation laundry tip. Sarah writes, I want to share how I batch laundry on a vacation. because laundry never takes a vacation. I bring plastic grocery bags, some lighter and some darker.

My family puts whites in the white bags like a target bag and darks in the darker bags. Then I pack the filled bags in our suitcase and just dump them into the wash when we get home. So I personally love pre-sorting vacation laundry. I love it. And that's something that I think has been shared here before. But I also wanted to share this tip with the white and dark bags. I like this because it's It matters if you wash according to colors. If that is how you sort your laundry, then separating them this way beforehand is actually really helpful.

But I also think it's great because it eliminates dirty laundry piles in the hotel room or vacation house or grandma's spare room or wherever you are when you're away. You're not leaving a growing pile of laundry on your floor, but you're also not having to fill like giant trash bags. I don't know, there's something about the smallness of those plastic bags.

I just really like this grocery bag idea, especially if you want the visual clutter of the laundry to go away and if you wash it porting to lights and darks. So this is a super simple idea that I think will help a lot of you. So thank you for sharing Sarah Jane, and congratulations on being the lazy genius of the week. Okay, y'all, that is it for today. Thanks so much for listening. And until next time, be a genius about the things that matter and lazy about the things that don't. I'm Kendra.

I'll see you next week. Have you ever felt like you were living just a B or B plus life? It's so dangerous to live that. More dangerous than a B minus or a C plus life because when you're living a B or B plus life, you don't change it. You think it's good enough. Is it?

I'm Susie Welch. I host a podcast called Becoming You. People think, okay, an A plus life is not available to me, but there is a way. We are all in the process of becoming ourselves. Listen to Becoming You wherever you get your podcasts.