The Lazy Genius Podcast - #342 - How to Uncomplicate Your Holiday To-Do List

Episode Date: November 27, 2023

December is a unique month, and therefore, you need to approach that month and your long to-do list in a way that feels kind and human and grounded and like yourself. But also where you get it all done, at least all the things that matter. I share this episode with Kind Big Sister Energy, meaning I think this works, and I think it could work for you, but as with anything I ever say, do what works for you. If this doesn’t, don’t do it.   Helpful Companion Links Episode #339: How to Make the Rest of 2023 Easier Episode #341: The Real Reason It’s Hard to Get Stuff Done Trello Episode #135: Nailing Your Holiday Vibe Sign up for the Latest Lazy Listens email. Grab a copy of my book The Lazy Genius Kitchen or The Lazy Genius Way! (Affiliate links) Download a transcript of this episode.   This podcast is hosted by Kendra Adachi and executive produced by Kendra Adachi, Jenna Fischer and Angela Kinsey. To learn more about listener data and our privacy practices visit: https://www.audacyinc.com/privacy-policy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices

The ride that steals the spotlight every time it hits the road, that's the Volkswagen Tiguan. Its sleek exterior makes a first impression you can't ignore. Step inside to find available full leather seats and wood accents. Under the hood, the available 201 turbocharged horsepower engine gives it a fun to drive edge. The refined Tiguan, you deserve more style. Visit vw.ca to learn more. SuvW, German engineered for all. Hi there. You are listening to the lazy genius podcast. I'm Kendra Adachi and I'm here to help you be a genius about the things that matter and lazy about the things that don't. Today is episode 342. How to uncomplicate your holiday to do list. Now, here is what I need from you for this episode to be helpful. If you are underwater and you don't really know all that you need to get done, you haven't named what matters during the month of December and you're a little bit like a, you know,

know, a chicken with your head cut off. I want you to first listen to episode 339, how to make the rest of 2023 easier. That is an episode that helps you clarify what you actually need to get done and what you can release. It's very practical, but uncomplicating your to do list, it honestly has to start there. If you have not done that process of naming what matters, this episode right now, it just won't be as helpful as it could. It's like a Band-Aid when you need PT, you know? So if that's you, I want you to listen to episode 339 first. Now, if you did listen to episode 339, and you actually have a pretty good handle on what you want to do and what you need to do, but you're struggling to actually do it, you know, you just keep moving undone tasks to the next list, or they just sit there

unchecked and you're like, almost confused by why this is so hard. I am guessing you missed last week's episode, episode 341. It's called the real reason it's hard to get stuff done. I think you need to listen to that before you listen to this. You likely need a renewed perspective on seasons like this one, where there are ordinary things that still need to get done alongside many out of the ordinary things, right? Our brains are pinballing from like regular dinner plans to large projects, like decorating for the holidays, from school winter band concerts. I have so many of those this year to remembering to play holiday music in your house.

You're like, oh, I really love that. You want to experience the magic of December, but you're also trying to coordinate holiday plans with complicated family members. There are just so many different kinds of things happening around you and inside of you, and your brain is beat, right? It's just done. So without a kind reality check, you will become an unkind robot. You might actually feel like one now.

You're already annoyed with December, even though it hasn't technically started yet. And you would just like all this to be over. So I don't want you to listen to this episode in that headspace. It will not be helpful. This episode is very practical. It has steps and strategies. I'm going to tell you to pull out index cards. It's going to help you with your to do list.

But I want you to hear it as a human person, not as an overstimulated robot. Okay. So if you need that perspective shift and like that injection of kindness before you uncomplicate your holiday to do list, please listen to episode 341 first just last week. Okay. Now, now I am assuming that I am speaking only to beautiful human beings with beautiful, sometimes very complicated lives during a very full season. You understand where you are.

You have a lot to do. You have a lot you want to enjoy. You've named those things. You've let go of some things. You understand that you have to approach these next few weeks a little differently. Then you might approach, you know, March or June or September. December is a unique month. And therefore, you need to approach that month.

your probably long to-do list in a way that feels kind and human and grounded and like yourself, right? But also where you get your stuff done, at least the things that matter. So that's where we are. Now, I have an approach that I often use during months like this and it works like a dream for me. And I'm going to share it with you. As always, though, I'm going to share this idea with very kind, big sister energy, meaning I think this works and I think it could work for you, which is why I'm sharing. it. But as with anything I ever say, I want you to do what works for you. If this doesn't, don't do it. Or if only part of it seems like it might work, do part of it. Right. But as we keep going in this episode, I am going to speak to you as though you're doing the steps, right? I've got

my big sister hat on right now. So this is your like one and only disclaimer that you can take what you want and leave what you don't. Okay, here's what we're going to do. Can you all hear the rain, by the way? It's like raining really hard outside. So sorry if you can hear the rain. Or maybe you're welcome if you can hear the rain. Maybe it's very calming. I can't really get rid of the rain sound. All right. I am going to share with you an analog process that helps me uncomplicate my holiday to-do list. It is a process that helps me see what's happening and where I need to put the items on my list, the things I need to do. You probably have one long to-do list for December. and it's making you sad because of how big and complicated it feels. It's a lot of things.

So this process uncomplicates it by turning that long December list into multiple weekly lists. That's really what we're doing here. So you can do that however you want, but this is a way I like to do it. That way you're only doing what's yours to do that week and nothing else. You don't even see anything else. It just helps you know where you are without being over. overwhelmed by where you are. Okay. So the first thing you're going to do is you're going to get either index cards or just like old scrap paper, you know, cut into like general index card shape. You'll probably need about 20 is my guess. I find that this process, it needs to be analog for me. It needs to be with paper with my hands, right? But if you want to do this digitally, you can.

And I would say Trello, T-R-E-L-L-O is an excellent. excellent tool for this. It actually has like cards built into it. That's how it's built. It's like index cards underneath lists. So it's the best tool I found to mimic this process if you are, you know, very much into the digital thing or you don't have index cards around or, you know, whatever. Okay. So the reason that we are using index cards rather than just making lists on paper is because I want to be able to move tasks around in order to find their best place. So that is the whole point of this process. Our objective is to uncomplicate our complicated holiday to-do list by putting categories of

tasks in place in their correct week, in their best week. Maybe correct is too much of an anagram one word, but like in the week that makes the most sense for them, right? Because usually once you see all your stuff laid out, you're like, you know what, this is not the best place for this. Let's move this to a different week. This week's too busy. And then you can just move it, right? The index cards help you tangibly do that. And then you can visualize the whole thing so much better. And also for the record, I also use a different color marker or pen or whatever for each of the steps I'm going to share so that I can

distinguish the cards from one another when I look. All right. I'm just telling you that at the top. In case you want to do the same, I'm not going to keep telling you to use different marker colors. but for all these different steps, I use a different color. Aw isn't something we need to travel for. It's something waiting for us in everyday life, whether in a city street or a moment with a work of art. I'm Dr. Keltner, host of the Science of Happiness podcast. Join me for Cities of Aw,

a special series on how our public spaces can spark awe, wonder, and enhance the quality of public life. You can find us wherever you listen to your podcasts. All right, let's get a handle on where we are in the calendar. This episode was released, has been released on Monday, November 27th, which for some of you could be today, right? December 31st is a Sunday. So if we're looking at a week being Monday to Sunday, which for some of you is absolute sacrilege, we have exactly five weeks of December remaining from literally today. So for the purposes of this process, I personally include Sunday as the last day of the week instead of the first one, because weekend plans often extend into Sunday.

For me, Monday is a cleaner start than a Sunday is when I'm breaking my weeks into weeks. Like Sunday might have prep in it for the next week, but it's not the beginning for me. Monday's the beginning. But you do you, okay, you do you. Okay. again, the reason that December feels like a lot is because we're looking at the entire month at once. It's just December. It's just one bucket of time. I would like you to instead think about the next five weeks as five buckets of time. By distributing the things that you have left to do

amongst the remaining December weeks, you are assigning appropriate urgency. You are putting your tasks in their right order, right? You're putting them in a place in a particular week where they are best suited. Essentially what you're doing, you are making December smaller. So here's what you're going to do. You're going to take five of your index cards or, you know, whatever you're using and write week one, two, three, four, five, you know, on each one. I also put the date range on the card so that I know what the dates are. So, you know, the first card will read week one, 1127 through 12, 3. The next card is week two, 12-4 through 12-10, week three, blah, blah, blah, blah. You know?

So one card is one week. Okay? Once you fill out those weekly bucket cards, you're going to put them across the top of your table or your desk or the floor across the top of wherever you are. Okay. Next, you're going to take five more index cards, one for each week. And on each card, in a different color from the dates if you want, write down the unusual things that are happening for that week. Not what you have to get done, just the things that are

happening that are out of the ordinary. Okay. Now, I do not make an individual card for each individual thing that's happening because those things probably are not moving. In fact, if something that's happening is movable, I think you should put it on its own card because then you might need to move it. But for the most part, what is happening on your calendar? it will happen the week that it's scheduled, right? So you can put everything that's happening that week on one card since they all essentially live together in that same week, right? They happen together, so they're written together.

Okay. So as an example, here is what's on my what's happening cards. We'll call them our what's happening cards. On my first card for week one, I would write and did write, Ben's birthday, band booster meeting. That's still happening. Sam's All-County band performance, All Lessons and Carol's rehearsal,

Annie's choir performance, and our Christmas opening ceremony weekend that literally spans two, three entire days. It's like the whole weekend. Those are the unusual things that are happening that first week, that are not normal, rhythmic things like school and work and meals and laundry and whatnot, right?

Week two, the unusual things. that are happening week two for me. Lessons and carols, the actual, like, there's dress rehearsal and the two performances and all the things. This is like a church Christmas thing I do. Both kids have band concerts and it's my father-in-law's birthday. Still a lot, but also less than week one. All right. Now, week three is much shorter. The only thing happening that's out of the ordinary so far is that it's my last week of work before our winter break. So I will work a lot more than usual, trying to get ahead that week so that myself and my team can take a full two weeks off for the holidays, right? That work rhythm, that week, it's going to be unusual. I'm not going to work the same rhythm

that I normally do. I'm going to have to work a lot more. And then week four, there's nothing happening other than Christmas fun, like literally nothing crazy is happening outside of just enjoying the holiday. We're all home. Causes off. I'm off. The kids are off. We're just hanging, right? Same goes for week five, except that. It also includes, week five includes my birthday. and then maybe something for New Year's Eve. I don't know yet. Okay. So here's what you do. You're going to place your what's happening cards under their week, right? That way you can see what's happening. For me, those first two weeks are a beast. And seeing that is going to help me with this next part. Okay. Next, we're going to look at what you have to do. We're going to look at what you have to do,

not what's happening, but what you have to do. But this is a teeny bit different. We're going to start with those general holiday to-do list categories that you might still need to do. Categories you likely still have are things like choosing holiday gifts, buying holiday gifts, wrapping holiday gifts, decorating for the holidays, planning food for a holiday gathering, holiday baking, stuff like that, right? Those are actually my categories. Those are the ones that I'm using. So write one category per index card. Again, I use a different color for this section of things.

One category per card. Now, I know I've talked a lot about making tasks smaller. And that's important. If you don't acknowledge that buy holiday gifts, you know, that is not a proper to-do list item because of how big it is, you're going to stay overwhelmed by it. You're just going to write buy holiday gifts on your to-do list and you're going to keep transferring it week week and your entire to-do list will remain complicated. Breaking big things down into smaller pieces is so important. However, at this point in December, almost December, you likely need for things to be a little uncomplicated. I think the best way to do that is to see the category first before you see all the

many tasks involved with it and put the category in its best place. So you're going to put one holiday to do list category on each index card. Again, the things that are on my cards are choose gifts, shop for gifts. I haven't done either of those things yet. Wrap gifts, holiday baking, decorating. And the other one I did not mention before is holiday magic, which I'll get to later. Obviously, you have more to do in December than just what's in those categories, right? You have regular things like grocery shopping and work projects and stuff like that. And we'll get to those in a minute. But first, what I want you to do is put the categories in their place.

Look at the next five weeks. Look at your cards. Look at what you have going on within those five weeks. And start to play. Place those category cards where you think they make the most sense, right? You're not going to put wrap gifts before you put buy gifts, right? We know that. You're probably not going to put wrap gifts in week five in Christmas.

is over either. Those are things that reasonably make sense. But what you can do is put the cards where they make the most sense over the next five weeks based on when they need to happen and also based on what's already happening in your life. Let's get back to that holiday magic category that I mentioned a second ago as an example of this. For me, our holiday magic, and you know what I mean about holiday magic, right? You know, just the sparklies and the lights and all the things. That holiday magic for us starts this coming weekend with our opening ceremony that we do every year. There's this downtown festival on Friday that we always go to with friends and then we go to this parade, holiday parade on Saturday. We park in the same place. We always get McDonald's. We leave the

house at the same time. Like it's the best. And then we put up the tree and we decorate on Saturday, and then into Sunday if I need to. It's literally the best every single weekend. It's the It's always the first weekend of December because that's when this festival and parade happen. Okay? So we do this every single year. And that's the beginning of our holiday magic. That is our holiday opening ceremony. Now, I might feel separate from that, I might actually feel pressure to keep making holiday

magic all month long and feel bad about it not being around as much. You know, it's like, oh man, we want us to go see the Christmas lights. When are we going to go see the Christmas lights? you know, but really, when I look at the weeks left in December, I don't need to force holiday magic in weeks two and three. Week one is covered. And weeks two and three are quite busy. But four especially, that's where I'm going to put the holiday magic category. I'm going to let it live there, you know, we are going to like, we're going to go see all the lights, we're going to do the cozy things, we're going to watch the movies for sure during that week. Putting that category

in a particular week visually, what it does is releases me from trying to create holiday magic and new things in all those other weeks. Right? Not only that, those other weeks, they likely are going to contain other index cards of categories of things like shopping for gifts, which takes time. So seeing your categories and restricting them, so to speak, to a particular week or two, if you need to stretch it, it releases you from the expectation and the pressure to make everything happen at once. And usually when you feel like you have to make everything happen at once, nothing happens. Nothing gets done. You don't make any headway on anything because you're barely doing anything across a very wide spectrum of tasks.

and you always feel behind, right? So I don't need to worry about wrapping gifts right now. I haven't even bought any gifts yet, right? I'm going to wrap in week four. It's going to be awesome. I'm going to watch my Lord of the Rings. It's going to be the best. But if I'm going to wrap week four,

then I need week three to be for possibly shopping, but really shipping. You know, I want to make sure that everything gets here if I'm ordering things online. So really we'll put shopping in week two, which means I need to know pretty much what I'm choosing, week one. And that's where these cards go. And now I can see it, right?

I can see when the things are happening. And I don't need to worry about anything in any of the weeks except the one that I'm in right now. Everything has a place. Now, I don't have a to-do list yet, but I can see where things go. The visualization of the cards, even though it is so simple. It's so simple. It works wonders for me. It's like it just unlocks something in my brain that makes me go, oh, I got it. I got it. That's when I do that thing. Instead of seeing one giant list across one giant month, I see five small lists across five weeks. I see where things need to go. Also, before we go to the final step, back to the holiday magic thing real quick. You can create holiday seasonal magic every single day. every single day. You don't have to like save it for a specific week. Listen to episode 135, nailing your holiday vibe, making some small sensory choices now. You know, like I would love to play

that fireplace show on Netflix like every day. You know, you like candles, you have cozy blankets around. You make soup a lot more than normal. Like those things create a holiday vibe and they impact your every day. That is its own kind of holiday magic, right? Where you're amplifying things that you just already do, rhythms you already have. So when I say that I wait or that I can wait for holiday magic until like the week before Christmas, I mean things like going to see lights and watching the movies and whatever we love doing that feels specifically magical to our particular Christmas experience, you know, baking, stuff like that. But vibes, vibes, you guys, vibes happen all the time. So again, that's episode 135 if you want to nail your holiday

vibe. Now we have one final step and it's basically to make your list. You can take this part in a couple of different ways. You can take your category cards and even on the back of them, you can write some specific smaller tasks that fit inside that category if that helps and if the tasks fit on the card. Doing that might not help. You're like, no, I'm just going to put it on my list. And also the task might not fit. Things like buying gifts, you know, that's probably not going to fit on the back of an index card, like all the small tasks, all the people you're going to buy for. But I offer that as an option if that works for whatever your categories might be. Also, I use this not just for holidays. I use this for like big project seasons where it feels like there's a lot happening and I need to

break it down by week. So just file that away. The index card is really helpful to write down the small tasks of the big category on the other side. Okay. Now, for me, what I tend to do now, my final step here is I just generate five different to-do lists, one for each week. That's it. And then I can more easily see what is mine to do one week at a time. It sounds very simple and it is. It is. But it's wildly helpful to settle my brain during busy seasons like this. So for each week, what might go on your to-do list? Well, there are going to be small tasks that are probably attached to what's happening that week, right, to the things that you wrote down on your what's happening cards. So like, for example, for me, in my week one as a reminder, the things that are happening are

Ben's birthday, Ben's my kid, Ben's birthday, a band booster meeting, Sam's band performance, lessons in Carol's rehearsal, Annie has acquired performance, and then our opening ceremony weekend. Okay, the natural tasks that could come out of that, they will be. And I will write these down in my planner for that week's to do list are. wrap Ben's birthday gift, make Ben's birthday dessert, type up the agenda for the booster meeting, schedule a ride for Sam to the performance early because he has to be there early and we can't take him. Practice my updated vocal part a couple of times before the music rehearsal that I'm going to because I got a new part. Text the grandparents about Annie's choir performance, right?

those are tasks that come out of what's happening. The opening ceremony weekend is already playing, like I said, like we just do the same thing every year, which is the best. So it doesn't really require anything to remember. So that's fine is a thing that's just going to happen. It's just happening. But I will write those things on my weekly to-do list for that week. And then I will also add any regular things that I know we're going to be there,

like meal plan or grocery shop or whatever. I can also just add to that list throughout each week, obviously. you know, you're not creating a static to-do list that never pivots or never changes. You're going to have to add things and take things away and move stuff sometimes. I'm just creating a list of things that are unusual that I know need to get done that particular week. It gives me a great place to start. I will also add, going to these categories now, I will also add either in like all caps or even in a different color on my to-do list, either that single category of holiday task that I put that week,

like all caps finish choosing all the gifts. And then I will like block off a couple of lunch hours in my calendar or maybe an evening to get that done. I know like, okay, this is my singular task that I'm finishing. I've got to complete this category this week. Right. Now, if it is choosing all the gifts, I don't need to necessarily write down every single person I'm choosing gifts for on my weekly to-do list because that, as you have probably learned from a previous episode or from that gift giving email that we sent out last week, I have a little

gift notebook. That's where I put all that stuff, right? But I'm just using that also as an example of like, you can use your common sense as you do this. You don't need to be a robot about it. You don't have to write down like every single piece in part to a bigger project unless you'll forget them, unless you'll forget those pieces and parts. But if you know you've got a category reserved for a particular week, put that category in its place, on your calendar, block the time, if you need to, write the category of the thing on your to-do list and get it done. Get it done kindly. Get it done with something joyful happening around you, like music or people or whatever. But now you get it done. You know where it goes. You know where it goes. And then I do that for every single

week. I make five different lists. And then when I get to that week, I add to them as I need to, right? Now, if I finish a week, if I get to the end of this week, for example, and there are still undone tasks, from this week's list. I do move them to next week, but I also pay attention why I need to move them. Why did they not get done? Is it something that is going to cause me to have to move it again in another week? If I'm having trouble getting it done, I ask myself, why? Maybe it doesn't matter. Maybe the thing doesn't matter. Maybe it's too big. Maybe there are pieces of information I'm missing that have to come from somewhere or someone else, that is usually a pretty big culprit for a lot of us,

is we're waiting on someone else and we don't even really know that that's what we're waiting for. Or maybe I'm making something complicated when it needs to be simple, you know? So if you have undone tasks, when you move to a new week, you move into a new week, ask yourself why. Be kind, have common sense,

and then figure out how to get that thing done in a way that aligns with what matters to you. and you just go from week to week. Only look at one weekly task at a time, or not weekly task, weekly list at a time. Only look at one list at a time. Because guess what? You've put everything in place.

You don't have to worry that things aren't going to get done or that you're forgetting something because you've already put them in the week they go. But just look at one week at a time. So you're not so overwhelmed. And that's how I uncomplicate my holiday to-do list. I hope it helps you uncomplicate yours. If you are a caffeinated squirrel brain person like I am, sometimes you just need to organize the craziness in your head on movable index cards.

That's what you need to do. You have to make your giant December list smaller by breaking it into weeks. And then even smaller than that by simplifying the number of things on your list by relying on those categories, by relying on those broader categories rather than all the small tasks within them. You likely at this point already have the perspective of recognizing all the small tasks within it, you know, within that category. But you no longer have to see those tasks in order to get the category done. Maybe seeing all the tasks is more overwhelming than just seeing the category itself. Only you can know that.

Only you can choose, right? But you're basically playing Tetris with your schedule. But in a very kind, compassionate, and human. way. And that's why it's so important for you to listen to Episode 339 and 341 before listening to this one, especially 339, especially how to make the rest of 2023 easier. If you have not yet gone through some kind of process to help you name what particular things matter this holiday season and then what you can also let go of, you're going to be stressed out. You just will. So let's not do that. Only do what matters as much as you're able and then let the rest go. I hope that. I hope

this episode has helped you. I hope you grab a handful of index cards and you uncomplicate your holiday to-do list. We're basically just applied now soon later, never mind, that to do list framework to December, right? I love that for us. We did such a good job. All right, before we go, let's celebrate the lazy genius of the week. This week, it is Sarah Carncross, and Sarah writes this. So here's what I've done every year to help make life and packing the car easier. I buy three separate Christmas wrapping paper designs. One for my extended family. one for my in-laws and one for our immediate family. Since my husband packs the car for Christmas Day,

it's easy for me to shout, grab the snowman presents for the first party. This way no presents are left behind and we don't have to rifle through an entire car in the freezing Michigan air to read and find every present label for grandma. Plus everything matches, so in my head I feel like I put an extra effort

when really it's just limiting myself to three separate paper designs. What a great idea that says. I've heard similar ideas for kids, kids gifts where different kids have different paper. And sometimes you don't even label the, I did that one year where I didn't even label their presence. I just, every kid had one paper, different paper. So they wouldn't like try to figure out what their presence were, but then they would try to figure out which paper was theirs. It was a whole thing. But I love this particular

application because of the holiday travel piece and the packing the car. Like this is really smart to just be like, okay, this is the grandma paper party. Not grandma paper. Snowman paper party. Can you imagine if there's grandma paper? Was it something? please make Christmas grandma favor? I would buy it right now. Okay, so Sarah, thank you so much for sharing this idea and congratulations on being the lazy genius of the week. Okay, one quick reminder before we go. Next Wednesday, December 6th is the next issue of the latest lazy litter that will hit inboxes. So I think a lot of you listening already get that email and you love it based on the messages we get. But if you do not get that email, give it a try. I write one email a month that is

packed with book reviews, things I'm learning, tips I'm trying at home and a lot more. I am pretty sure this month will also contain an update on my list of celebrity crushes. So there's that. You can sign up at the lazy genius collective.com slash join. All right, y'all, that's it for today. Thank you so much for listening. And until next time, be a genius about the things that matter and lazy about the things that don't. I'm Kendra. I'll see you next week. Have you ever felt like you were living just a B or B plus life? It's so dangerous to live that more dangerous than a B minus or a C plus life. because when you're living a B or B plus life, you don't change it. You think it's good enough.

Is it? I'm Susie Welch. I host a podcast called Becoming You. People think, okay, an A plus life is not available to me, but there is a way. We are all in the process of becoming ourselves. Listen to Becoming You wherever you get your podcasts.