The Life Of Bryony - The Life of YOU: Amanza Smith on Loneliness, Identity and Finding Yourself Again

Episode Date: May 30, 2025

Welcome to The Life of YOU! The bonus series where we tackle your dilemmas and share advice to navigate life’s trickier moments. This week, I’m joined by Amanza Smith—star of Selling Sunset, interior designer and fine artist. Amanza opens up about navigating loneliness, motherhood, and identity after heartbreak, as well as the importance of choosing yourself—especially when time and energy are in short supply. Together, we answer your questions about guilt, self-expression and rediscovering your style when you’re starting from scratch. Today: 💬 An overwhelmed single mum wants to sketch in her free time—but feels guilty for doing something she enjoys. How can she overcome that guilt? 🛋️ A newly single 41-year-old has moved into her first solo home but feels lost without a personal style. Is it too late to discover one? WE WANT TO HEAR FROM YOU 🗣 Got a question or a story to share? Text or send a voice note on 07796657512—just start your message with LOB 💬 Use the WhatsApp shortcut: https://wa.me/447796657512?text=LOB 📧 Prefer email? Drop us a line at [e-mail] If this episode resonated with you, please share it with someone who might need it—it really helps! Bryony xx CREDITS 🎙 Presenter: Bryony Gordon 🎙 Guest: Amanza Smith 🎧 Content Producer: Jonathan O’Sullivan 🎥 Audio & Video Editor: Luke Shelley 📢 Executive Producer: Mike Wooller 🛠️ Studio Manager: Sam Chisholm A Daily Mail production. Seriously Popular. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This episode of The Life of Briny is sponsored by Asda, celebrating 60 years of great family value. That's Asda Price. Welcome to The Life of You, our bonus series where we answer your questions and try to make sense of life's trickier bits. I'm joined again by Amanda Smith, star of Selling Sunset, interior designer, and contemporary fine artist. Thank you very much. Today we're talking about loneliness, identity, and how to hold on to yourself when everything's falling apart. You have to put your mask on first and then help those around you.

If mama doesn't feel good, no one is good. Your question's answered right after this. Getting your kids to school safely is important to you. It's important to us too. Toyota, for what matters most. Why do Fintechs like Float choose Visa? As a more trusted, more secure payments network, Visa provides scale, expertise and innovative payment solutions. Learn more at visa.ca slash fintech.

This is a paid advertisement from Asda. Confession time. I've never been what you'd call a natural in the kitchen. Cooking has always felt a bit overwhelming, especially on those busy, slightly chaotic weeknights. But thanks to Joe Wicks and Asda, I've gone from what's for dinner panic to serving up something genuinely tasty in next to no time. Joe and Asda have teamed up to create quick, budget-friendly family recipes that make life so much easier. We're talking sizzled beef fajita pasta, sweet chili chicken stir fry, and cheesy peasy fish cakes. Dishes packed with flavor that your family will love. It's no fuss,

no faff, and definitely know what's for dinner debates around the kitchen table. Honestly, it's made even me feel like a kitchen hero, even if all I did was follow Joe's simple steps. Just search Joe Wick's Meal Picks at asda.com and take your pick. That's asda price. So this is a question from someone who's decided to remain anonymous. I love it, Amaz is putting on her glasses so I can hear you better. She's getting into the role of agony aunt. I love it. These are sexy.

Thank you, thank you. So anonymous says, I'm a single mom with zero free time, but when I do get an hour to myself, all I want to do is sketch. I feel selfish choosing that over cleaning or admin or catching up on work. How do I get over the guilt of something I enjoy when I have no free time?

You have to put your mask on first and then help those around you, right? The plane goes down, they say, put your mask on first, help those around you, right? The plane goes down, they say, put your mask on first, help those around you. If mama doesn't feel good, no one is good. Nobody is treated the same. It's not as safe. So mama has to do something to release and feel good.

All the other stuff can wait. That house isn't gonna clean itself, no, but it's also not going to beat your children. The admin work isn't gonna get done on its own, but you're not gonna get fired if you go in and you go post on your office. You have to do something to recharge yourself. And you deserve it because, yeah, that's it.

I love that. I love that. Be selfish. They're new. What, the dresses or the... Well, both actually, but I was talking about the boobs. Yeah. Love it. I love it.

They're new. The other one's busted. I had two flat tires. Sorry, what happened? I don't know. I've had them 17 years. I'd had them 17 years. Okay. They had a lot of mileage on them. And they just, that happens. You have to get new, you have to get them like re- I mean, I don't know anybody else that's had tits that long,

so maybe it's just me. They just, yeah, after a while you're supposed to get checked at least. Some of them hold up. I hear these are like, sort of like, will last forever. I don't know if they're supposed to last forever or I'm just gonna die before they go out of commission at this point. So yeah, I didn't know. I did a full body scan and they were like, both of your breast implants are ruptured.

I had no idea. Wow. Yeah, they didn't look ruptured. They didn't feel ruptured. But it looked, it started to weirdly weirdly scheduled the surgery to get them repaired. And then I could physically see it or visibly see it like before the surgery. It's starting to like they were leaking. Wow. But oddly, so were Breeze and so were Mary's and so were Christelle's.

Like we all had leaking boobs at the same time. Do you think they synced like a period? They sunk. They sunk like a period. You know how you hear about when women are all together, their menstrual cycles start to sync up, right? Maybe your breast implants decided to leak all at the same time. I'm happy to sync everyone up. I was just trying, maybe I didn't. I was like, maybe what can I bring? How can I bring the group together?

You're uniting them through leaking breast implants? No, I think a lot of people probably have it. They just don't know because they don't do the full body scan. You have no symptoms. I had no, nobody knew that theirs were busted. And when I found out Mary's symptoms. I had no, nobody knew that theirs were busted. And when I found out Mary's were, I was like, well, maybe I should check mine. So that, cause we saw that in season eight where she had the operation to get them taken out

and put back in. Okay, wow. Okay, so I'm 41. I've just left a long-term relationship and I'm moving into my first place that's just mine. The thing is, I've never really had a style and I'm scared it's too late to develop one. How do I figure out what I like when I spent so long just making do? Just making do like...

Just like, just going with the flow of what everyone else likes. Okay, so when I decorate a home for like a client of a family of a man woman them they anybody the first thing that I do is I tell them just start sending me random photos it can be anything that you like it could be a bird it could be a shoe it could be a sign it doesn't have to be a furniture anything and just sort of start to make a little like an album of things that you are attracted to, you know? And then go on Pinterest and just look at photos. And if something makes you go, oh, save it, and just start to collect.

You don't have to do it overnight. Like, take your time and start to see when you go to a restaurant or a hotel or you're walking down the street or a friend's house or anything, you see a commercial, you're watching Selling Sunset and you see an interior, start to pay attention to maybe what you like and then keep it in a little album and then you'll start to see that things, maybe they are related.

And if they're not, then you have a collective style and you just do whatever makes you happy. You don't have to have that. Now, if you specifically want a style because you wanna have the ladies think you're cool, hire an interior decorator. Or not everybody has the means to do that. You go on and you look at

whoever you think is cool, Tom Brady. Tom Brady's master penthouse in New York. I don't know, look at Jay-Z and Beyonce's house, look at people's, and start to see what you really like because it'll start to grab your eye. And then if that doesn't work, revert back to childhood and what made you happy then and just try to figure out a way to make it more mature.

If you love Legos, get a red sofa. Like it's really nothing that you have to put too much, it's not rocket science and it's just to make you happy. So just continue to look and just start to pay attention to what makes you feel good but don't run out and get the you know the rent to own sofa that's just what every other man has because you won't you won't like it eventually. I think that's a really good bit of advice is Get what makes you happy. Yeah, I'm sure home and you're gonna and the going for the childhood like my home

I like I have like toddler core like my house is very bright colors and That's what and people are like, oh, I don't like you. This is I live here. This is what makes me happy Yeah, you do you start with something? Yeah, that I'm like, this is, I live here, this is what makes me happy. Yeah. You do you. Start with something, yeah, that really is like, as childhood, what did you have as a child that you loved or what did you want that you didn't have? And then maybe you can get it. And you don't have to spend a lot of money.

You can go online and Xerox copy off like a print of something, you know, to start there, color it in yourself with markers, or you could go to like posters.com and get something that's like I did somebody's house once he had just gone through divorce and he Bachelor pad he left comic books, but you know, he's a grown man and we did a whole wall of calm black and white made him black and white but they were comic book covers and we just Framed him in all cool different frames and did like a whole wall of black and white, made them black and white, but they were comic book covers. And we just framed them in all cool, different frames and did like a whole wall of black and white comic book covers.

He didn't ask for a bed that was a car, did he? Yeah. No bunk beds with a trundle in case you get as a bitch of company. That's what I have. He didn't ask for comic books. I was just like, he seems like he probably would like this. Thank you so much, Manza. This is a paid advertisement from Asda. You know those weeknights where everything feels like a

rush? Homework to finish, bath time chaos, kids running riot. And somehow you've still got to make dinner too. It's the classic parenting juggle. Well, this is where Joe Wicks and Asda come in as the heroes we didn't know we needed. Joe's teamed up with Asda to create quick, easy, budget-friendly meal ideas that are delicious. Think sticky chicken noodles, Mexican meatball tray bakes, creamy salmon pasta, real food that's quick to rustle up, tasty and budget-friendly. Because sometimes the biggest win of the day is getting the whole family fed and still having five minutes to yourself before bedtime negotiations begin.

Whether you're feeding fussy toddlers or grumpy teenagers, Joe Wick's meal picks take the stress out of dinnertime. Search Joe Wick's meal picks at asda.com now to see what your lot will love. That's Asda Price. There are very few things that you can be certain of in life. But you can always be sure the sun will rise each morning. You can bet your bottom dollar that you'll always need air to breathe and water to drink. And of course, you can rest assured that with Public Mobile's 5G subscription phone plans, you'll pay the same thing every month.

With all of the mysteries that life has to offer, a few certainties can really go a long way. Subscribe today for the peace of mind you've been searching for. Public Mobile. Different is calling. This is a paid advertisement from Asda. Joe, I'm not a natural in the kitchen. I panic when it gets to dinner time. I don't know where to start. Can you tell me, have you always felt confident in the kitchen or did you have to learn to? Listen, you're not alone. Many people struggle with this and I also used to find it really difficult but I think the more you cook, the more experience you get, the more confidence

you get and you can really learn to love cooking. But yeah, look, I've got four kids under six. It's stressful. Food has to be quick, simple and easy and that's why I love sharing recipes online that are going to do just that and get people actually cooking and doing it often. For kids under six, I have no excuse. You've teamed up with Asda for Joe Wick's Meal Picks. Can you explain what that is? So Joe Wick's Meal Picks are a series of recipes that I've created to make, you know, food simple and quick and easy to help families, you know, that are on a budget that have lots of kids and that are stressed and time poor to put healthy food on the table and

do it in a way that's enjoyable, that's sustainable and that's achievable. They're created with kids in mind, but the whole family can enjoy them. Is that right? Yeah, these are recipes that I've designed for the whole family to enjoy. You know, they're simple, there's very few ingredients. You can get the kids involved as well. Make it fun, like come together and enjoy cooking because it can change your life in so many ways. Which of Joe Wick's meal picks would you suggest someone like me cooks first to boost their confidence? I would give my sweet chili chicken thigh stir fry go.

It's really simple, ready in about 10 minutes and it tastes delicious. Tell me Joe, how do your recipes make people feel less intimidated? Is it the simplicity and the kind of clear steps involved? One thing I try and achieve is that I try and get people cooking and make it not daunting and intimidating, make it just fun and a bit kind of accessible

because we don't have much time on our hands, we're stressed out, we're running around, we've got kids, we're looking after other people. So actually if I can make it quick and simple with few ingredients, then it's achievable and that is really the aim of the whole sort of as the meal picks ideas I've got. Okay. So what about making mistakes? Is there joy in making mistakes and can cooking be forgiving

and fun? Listen, I'm always burning things. I'm not a great chef. I'm a cook, but I'm not the best of cooks. So I always say, look, it's okay. If there's a little bit of burn, if it's a little bit charred, it's more flavor. It might not look the most presentable, but I think you've got to be kind to yourself and if you're someone who hasn't cooked, you can really learn to love it. You just got to start building your repertoire up and try a few different things and by the end of the month, you've got maybe three or four recipes you've learned and that's going to give you more nutrients in your diet, a varied diet, and it's going to be fun. You just got to give it a go and take the first step. Thank you so much, Joe. To find out more, just search Joe Wick's Meal Picks on asda.com for simple, quick and tasty midweek meal inspiration from Asda and Joe Wick's.

Thank you again to Emanza for being so generous with her story and her advice. If anything here resonated with you, please pass it on. It really does help people find the show. And most importantly, be kind to yourself. We'll see you next time. Hello, podcast listener. If you're a small business owner or marketing lead looking to See you next time. hearing one. That's a 60% higher ROI than any other media channel. If you're ready to reach an audience that truly listens, advertise with us. To find out more today, email podads at mailmetromedia.co.uk