The Liz Moody Podcast - 20 Brutal Truths I Wish Someone Told Me At 25

Episode Date: June 8, 2026

Most people spend their 20s and 30s either grinding toward a future they can barely picture, or living for today with no plan. But you are not most people. I will share exactly how to have both the life that you want right now while setting yourself up for your dream future. I'm sharing 20 secrets that I wish I had known earlier in life. Check out our NEW YouTube Channel with tons of YouTube exclusive Shorts, exclusive podcast content, and full video episodes: ⁠https://www.youtube.com/@LizMoodyTV⁠  Ready to uplevel every part of your life? Order Liz’s book 100 Ways to Change Your Life: The Science of Leveling Up Health, Happiness, Relationships & Success now!  Connect with Liz on Instagram @lizmoody or online at www.lizmoody.com. Subscribe to the substack by visiting https://lizmoody.substack.com/welcome. Buy our cute sweatshirts, conversation cards, and more at https://shop.lizmoody.com/. To join The Liz Moody Podcast Club Facebook group, go to www.facebook.com/groups/thelizmoodypodcast. Use our discount codes from our  highly vetted and tested brand partners by visiting https://www.lizmoody.com/codes.  This episode is brought to you completely free thanks to the following podcast sponsors: • AG1: visit DrinkAG1.com/LizMoody and get an AG1 Flavor Sampler and a bottle of Vitamin  • Branch Basics: head to BranchBasics.com and use code LIZMOODY for 15% off the premium starter kit. • IQ Bar: text LIZ to 64000 for 20% off.  The Liz Moody Podcast cover art by Zack. The Liz Moody Podcast music by Alex Ruimy. This podcast and website represents the opinions of Liz Moody and her guests to the show. The content here should not be taken as medical advice. The content here is for information purposes only, and because each person is so unique, please consult your healthcare professional for any medical questions. The Liz Moody Podcast Episode 437. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Most people spend their 20s and 30s, either grinding toward a future they can barely picture or living for today but with no real plan. But you are not most people. Give me 30 minutes and I will show you exactly how to have both. The life that you want right now while setting yourself up for your dream future. I've published four books. I host one of the top podcasts in the world. I am married to the love of my life.

But most importantly, I've built a life that feels good every day that I am excited to wake up for. So today I'm going to share 20 secrets that I wish I had known. earlier so you can get there too. Welcome to the Liz Moody podcast where we believe that there is always something that you can do to create a life that feels amazing and we help you figure out how to find the lever to pull at any moment to actually do that. Number one, you are not behind in life. You are not old and running out of time.

The only reason that you feel old is because people are trying to sell you things. You will regret later every single second that you are looking at. like, oh my God, 25 is so old or 35 is so old or 45 is so old. You are not old, I promise. You have so much life and time ahead of you. And the sooner that you internalize that you are a tiny baby very much at the beginning of your life, the better. Number two, do not confuse being good at something with it being good for you. Our brains like what they are good at. What we know feels safe to us. And sometimes what we know are toxic relationships. Sometimes what we know are workplaces that treat us like shit.

I cannot tell you the amount of friends that I've had who gravitate towards relationships that play out the exact toxic patterns of their childhood. And they are drawn to these relationships. They feel so good in them because they're familiar. And our brains like what is familiar. Recognize that sometimes that feeling of familiarity means you should actually run in the other direction. Number three, nobody is thinking about you as much as you think that they are. Stop wasting your time, worrying about that thing that you said or did or how you looked. I promise,

I promise, promise, nobody noticed. They are too busy, second guessing every little thing that they said or thinking about how they looked. Number four, stop waiting to open the good wine. This is something my dad always says. Don't wait for the good night to open the good wine. Make any night a good night by opening the good wine. And this is about wine, but it's also about everything. Like, wear the outfit that's just for special occasions, where the jewelry, host that dinner party that you've always been talking about, just make up a reason. Like, it's a Tuesday night festivity. It's a first Thursday in the summer festivity. People spend so much time waiting for their lives to get to the place where they give themselves permission to do the things that they

want to do. Do not live your life in the waiting room. Drink the good wine today. Number five, over the course of your life, people are going to recommend a lot of things to you. Only take a recommendation if it's really been tested for a long period of time. I cannot tell you the amount of people have been like, oh, you have to go to this person. They're the best. Or you have to buy this thing. It's the best. And then a month passes and they're like, oh, it broke. Or that person actually ended up really being somebody that I didn't like working with. People are so eager to be helpful that often they'll give advice or recommend things just for the sake of being helpful without actually having vetted that thing or sometimes even tried it at all. And for what it's worth, take all

advice with a grain of salt. Advice is just advice. Do not get stuck in the shoulds or what worked for other people. Really try to follow your own gut. Number six, find out what jobs exist. I have been surprised as I've made it through my 30s to hear about all of these jobs that my friends have that I find out people are making a lot of money in or they're really loving or feeling very fulfilled in. And I literally did not know these jobs existed. I grew up in a small-ish town and I feel like the only jobs I knew about were like accountant or doctor or lawyer, basically jobs that there were Barbies for. And as I've gotten older, I've realized there are so many interesting and dynamic career paths. However, you can figure out what jobs exist will help you make informed decisions about the

types of career paths that you might want to experiment with. So that could be asking around in your friend group. That could be following people on Instagram. That could be searching for stuff online, asking friends of friends. There's really interesting research on the most likely way to get a job is through what's called your weak ties. So those are the people who are one step removed from you. They're not your friends, they're not your parents, they're not your coworkers, they are your co-worker's cousin, or your friend's friend, et cetera, et cetera. They are the one-step removed people. And the idea is that these people exist outside of the bubble that we're in. So they have access to opportunities and ideas that we might not know about within our bubble. And there's quite a bit of research that

shows that you're far more likely to get a new job opportunity through those weak ties, through the one step removed people than the people who are your strong ties, the people in your direct network or your direct community. So explore your weak ties, both for ideas of what's out there and then because you're more likely to get a job through those people, according to research, so you can use the weak ties to pursue different interesting roles that you might not have even known existed before. Seven, at risk of sounding like Baz Luhrman here, wear sunscreen every single day and wash your face every single night. He didn't say the second part in his sunscreen song. So that was my original contribution. These go together, though,

because if you wear sunscreen during the day, not washing your face at night is extra gross. And I cannot tell you how much I did not do either of those things during my 20s. I never wore sunscreen. And most nights, this is so gross to say, I would go to bed with a full face of makeup on my face. I would go to bed with mascara and foundation and blush on and my pillowcase looked disgusting, and I probably wasn't even changing my sheets or my pillowcase all that much. And that is so bad for your skin. It kills me to see all of these people in their 20s spending all of this money on Botox and 10-step skincare routines.

And they're not wearing sunscreen every single day. Sunscreen is not only going to protect your skin from sun damage, which is the number one cause of basically everything that you are trying to treat your skin about, but it's also going to protect you against skin cancer, which outside of how we look is important because we would like to stay alive. And I had a dermatologist on my podcast recently, and she told me that sunscreen not only protects against future damage, it is actually repairing your skin by being anti-inflammatory in the moment. So it is serving as skincare in the moment too. I am not saying do not do other skin care, I am saying that the absolute bare minimum for your skincare routine that

all of us should do is sunscreen during the day and then wash your face at night. It doesn't feel too hard to do when I say it out loud. And yet, I didn't do it my entire 20s. Eight, get comfortable with failure. The people who create the lives of their dreams are people who take risks and being comfortable with failure is the key to taking risks. There's research that shows that we are far and away more likely to regret not taking a risk versus taking a risk, even if that risk does not work out. The people who are achieving the lives of their dreams are getting over whatever hump is preventing them from taking action. I have failed a million times in my life. I've written, I think, five, maybe six. I think five books that did not get published.

But every single time I wrote one of those books, I learned a little bit more. I learned how to actually get words down on the page. I learned how to get an agent. I learned how to adjust my writing to what the market was interested in reading at any given moment, which actually brings me to one of my top tips for failure, which is viewing it as information versus some sort of commentary on your identity on who you are as a person. And I'm not saying that this is easy and I couldn't do it immediately. Obviously, when I wrote an entire book, like 80,000 words and I couldn't get it published, I wasn't just like, oh, great information. Thank you so much. I really appreciate it. Ultimately, though, I was able to hone that skill, and that skill has been so key to me finding

the success that I have in my life. I saw Zach at a bar and I went over there and I talked to him. If I had been afraid of failing of having him reject me, which very much could have happened and has certainly happened with other people that I have hit on, I would have never met this person who's now and my life partner for the last 20 years. Literally, the biggest difference between people who have their dream lives and people who do not is not their intelligence or their skill levels. The single biggest difference is the opportunities created. If you create a thousand opportunities for yourself and 10 of those hit, those 10 are going to change your life. If you create 10 opportunities, instead of needing a 1% hit rate, you need a 100% hit rate to get the same amount of

opportunities. So practically, again, view failure as information. What can we learn from this that we can use in our lives going forward and not as any sort of commentary on who we are as a person? It should actually be a compliment to who you are as a person because you took a risk. That is 10 out of 10 and it puts you ahead of 99% of the population. Nine is kind of related. Nine is kind of related and it's push through the shitty period. We do not like things that we're bad at. Our brains are wired to not like things that we're bad at. If we can just get our heads around that one simple concept, it will change our entire lives because the reason that we don't like any new habit, working out, meditating, you could go down the list is because we are bad at it

because it's new to us. It's the reason that new friendships feel really hard because we're bad at that relationship. We haven't practiced it yet. So we were just talking about failure. Failure is going to feel really hard at the beginning, but that's because we're bad at failure and our brain doesn't like things that we're bad at. So we just need to push through that failure shitty period and then you'll get better at failure and your brain won't hate it as much. This is true for almost every new thing in life. Push through the time where you're bad at it because your brain wants to resist it because we are not wired to like the things that we're bad at, and then it's going to get a whole lot easier because you know what we love? We love things that we're good at. I actually love giving myself opportunities

to fail now because I have practiced it over and over and over the years, and I'm really, really good at it. That said, I will also add here one tiny caveat. Do not be afraid to fail, but if it's not working, take the valuable lessons that are there and pivot. Don't keep banging your head against a wall if it's not working for you after six months or a year. We don't have to spend our lives failing at the same exact thing over and over. Like take the failure, take the lessons, and pivot and try something new. Ten, and this actually goes with that. Spend less time thinking and more time doing. In life, there are door decisions and there are wall decisions. A few life decisions truly are wall decisions, like having kids or not. Like that is not something that you can go back on.

But the vast, vast majority are door decisions. You can open the door, you can poke around for a bit, and you can walk right back out that door. Sometimes we spend like six months thinking about a decision when we could have spent two weeks trying the thing out and getting real information about it. Most life decisions are open doors. In our 20s, we can become paralyzed by all of the different paths we could take in life. Don't spend too much time on door decisions. walk through the door, try it out.

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annoying, but so much more fun. I've become so much more of a princess about my sleeping situations and stuff like that. And I'm really glad that I had all of these life adventures at a time when I was much more okay with those forms of discomfort and I was just more generally carefree. If you are still in that time, take advantage of it. Book the trips. You can do them so much more affordably. Have the adventures. Number 12.

Do not put pressure on yourself to have a clear career path, but acquire skills. I think this is especially important in the age of AI when the career opportunities that even exist are changing all of the time. I remember in my 20s, I was really stressed out as I was thinking about the jobs that I was taking, like, what is this going to lead to? How is this going to ladder up to this? How will I get where I want to go with all of this? And the truth is, we do not know. We didn't know back when career paths were much more linear and we especially do not know now. But the skills that you acquire will all be worth something. None of it will be wasted. In my career now, which, literally did not exist when I was in my 20s.

I use almost every single skill that I gained at the various jobs that I worked in my 20s. The thing that I would not do is get complacent and just do the same thing over and over every single day. That is not going to get you new skills and that's not going to put you in the best position for the future. 13. Find a workout that you like and do that. As you get older, the specifics of the movement that you do are going to become way

more important for the way that it impacts your central nervous system and your bones and all of these other things. In your 20s, just moving at all in any way is going to put you so far ahead that is not really worth spending your energy over optimizing or overthinking it, especially if that's going to prevent you from doing anything at all. So find movement that you like and do it regularly. 14. Take a second on Sunday to plan for your week ahead. This Sunday, I looked at my week ahead, I was like, okay, I have Gretchen's birthday Wednesday night. So if I want to do a workout, I need to do it in the morning. And it's easier for me to run than wait train in the morning. So I'll plan to do arms on Tuesday and then my run on Wednesday. I realized that I didn't have any plans for Friday night and I have a really long day on Friday. And when I have

long days, I often want to socialize afterwards. So I reached out to a friend to see if she wanted to go to a trivia night on Friday night. So take 10 minutes and just map it out. That's how you actually make the things that you want to happen, happen instead of missing your workout or getting off a really long workday and being like, man, I really wish I had somebody to hang out with right now. 15. Drink more water. Whatever you got to do to drink it, just do it. Do electrolytes.

Do herbal tea. Do lemon water. You're going to feel 80 times better when you're not dehydrated anymore. 16. Get better at giving and receiving compliments. This is such a classy thing to be able to do. and it's going to make you like people more, and it's going to make people like you more. Forgiving compliments. I always think about the New York City subway system. I don't know what it's

like a warning, like a motto. If you see something, say something. Get good at if you see something, say something. If your friend has great style, say something. Tell them. If your friend showed up for you during a really hard time, tell them. If you appreciate advice that you got from your parent, Oh my gosh, tell them. That's all they want from us. It will make their day. If your boss helped you figure out a direction for a presentation, tell them.

If you see something, say something. It makes you feel good and it makes them feel good. In terms of receiving compliments, I am going to show you my best ever trick. It took me years to get good at this. Okay, I'm going to pretend that you just gave me a compliment and this is how I'm going to receive it. Notice it's not,

Oh no, I could never. Notice it's not me rushing to give you a compliment back in exchange. You ready for it? Let's say you just said, I like your shirt. I'm going to say, thank you. That is how you receive a compliment. It's going to feel hard at first, but like we talked about earlier, it's only hard because we are not good at it. So practice and it will get easier and then it will feel better. 17. The world isn't doomed. It just feels like that because we are consuming information about more people. and more traumas and more crises than any other time in history. Earlier in history, you would have known about your neighborhood, your town, maybe a few things going on in your country. Now we know about almost any bad thing that's happening in the world at any given moment.

Our brain is not evolutionarily equipped to process that much negative information. Our brains get depressed and overwhelmed because they literally cannot handle it. On top of that, we would rather be certain than uncertain, even if what is certain is scary. So our brains find comfort in people telling us this is what's going to happen, even if what's going to happen is bad. There's a study that shows that we would rather guaranteed receive an electric shock than not know if we're going to receive an electric shock. People online know how to take advantage of this. They tell us what's going to happen. They appeal to our brain's need for certainty.

and they often tell us bad news because it is so much more algorithmically engaging. The truth is, they don't know. We are all trying to predict the future. People are terrible at predicting the future, even the people who act like they know, especially, especially the people who act like they know. So consume less and create more and focus on the actions that you can take that matter and do not let people trying to capture your attention convince you that all is lost. because when we lose hope, we lose everything, and there is so much reason for hope right now.

18. Spend more time getting to know yourself and sitting with your own thoughts. When you're exhausted, you're likely not burnt out. You are overstimulated. I have an entire episode about the four types of tired and how you need to know what type of tired you are to actually fix it, to feel really rested. But one of the main types of tired that so many of us are, especially people, people in their 20s is input tired. We are scrolling all the time. Our brain is never quiet.

It's never alone with our thoughts. And it's the times where you are alone and quiet with your thoughts that are the most valuable in our lives, but especially in our 20s because these are the moments where you get to figure out who you are. I traveled a lot by myself in my 20s and my favorite moments of that travel weren't at museums or on walking tours or doing any of the stuff that had to do with the place itself. It was 100% when I was taking myself out to dinner or I was on a long bus ride or train ride by myself because I had these long chunks of time to just sit in my thoughts. Those are the times I got to know myself the best. Do not let all of the inputs of the world burn you out or get in the way of you getting to know yourself, which is one of the most important

tasks of your 20s. Get to know who you really, truly, authentically are. That includes asking yourself what life paths you're following because they feel true to you and what life paths you're following because they feel true to a parent or an old teacher that you had or what your friends are doing or what you see people on social media rewarding. That includes learning to truly do. That includes learning to truly delight in and enjoy your own company. And that includes not assuming that you know how you feel about something, whether it's I'm only attracted to tall men or I don't really like paddleboarding. Try to push your own boundaries. Try to test different things. Assume you do not know your own preferences yet and that your own preferences are always changing. Expose yourself to new people and new

environments, new places, new flavors, new songs, new smells. It's through that exposure and that time alone, spending time with yourself, with your own company that you're going to figure out what you really love and who you truly are. 19. Spend less time optimizing and more time living. We have access to more information now than we have had at any point in history. We can read reviews for toasters for literally days, and I do this. I'm so guilty of this.

But in truth, it does not matter whether you get the toaster that is 10 out of 10 or 9.6 out of 10 or 9 out of 10. It really probably doesn't matter if you get the 7 out of 10 toaster. It is just going to toast your stuff. We are losing hours of our precious days to things that make marginal differences, if any at all, in our lives. I would include wellness culture. Honestly, I would especially include wellness culture in this. We are trying to optimize our sleep. We're trying to optimize our habits. And we're losing so much of the time that we're trying to gain to live our lives, to feel good, to enjoy ourselves, to do all these things that are supposed to make us live longer. Longer for what? Figure out a good enough option and then just

go with that. 20. You are doing enough. There are a lot of people trying to make a lot of money by making you feel like you are not doing enough. Right now, you listening to this right now, I promise you are doing so much better than you think. And I just really want you to sit with that for a second. You are enough just as you are, just as you were born, and you are doing enough. Just for being the person that you are, you deserve an extraordinary life. You deserve to feel good. You deserve to feel happiness. You deserve to feel love. And I hope the stuff that we talked about today gets you a little bit closer to all of those things. Let me know in the comments what hits for you, what you would add, what you think I got wrong, and send this to your favorite

20-something or 20-something at heart. So they do not have to learn all of these lessons the hard way like I did. I love you and I will see you on the next episode of the Liz Moody podcast. Oh, just one more thing. It's the legal language. This podcast is presented solely for educational and entertainment purposes. It is not intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, a psychotherapist, or any other qualified professional. The mattress that you sleep on is one of the highest exposures that you have. Like, if it's off-gassing, you're breathing that in for basically a third of your life, and most conventional mattresses are loaded with synthetic foams, flame retardants, microplastics,

and more. Plus, if it's not comfy, you're going to be tossing and turning, you're going to be really hot. And sleep is the foundation of health. It is so important. because of all of this, if I were not going to invest in any other part of my house, no other things in my house, I would invest in my mattress. And in fact, I have four years well before I had much money to spend on any of these things because it is such a big needle mover.

The birch mattress is incredible. It is made with organic cotton, natural latex, and ethically sourced wool. So it has literally no off-gassing. You can not smell anything right when you unbox it. It has no microplastics, no synthetic foams or flame retardants. And the wool makes it so breathable, which if you've listened to this podcast for more than five minutes, you know that I run very, very hot. Like I am a furnace.

Zach has basically accepted that sleeping next to me is like sleeping next to like a little fire. And the birch mattress has been a game changer for that. It's made me sleep so much better. Like I can see my sleep score going up because I'm not hot all night long. It's also hypoallergenic, which is really worth paying. attention to if you find yourself waking up stuffy or congested. Dust mites in a conventional mattress can actually impact your breathing and your sleep quality without you even realizing it. And again, we need to be able to breathe to get good sleep and getting good sleep is the foundation

of our health. And then comfort wise, Zach sleeps on his back and then I sleep on my side and my stomach. So we have two completely different sleep styles and we both wake up feeling really good, no aches and pains. CNN actually named the Birch mattress, the best mattress for some of side sleepers and Wired named it the best organic mattress period. So there you go. Birch has options for every kind of sleeper in your household. They have three firmness layers. I like the Lux Natural, which is the medium one. And then parents, they even have a Birch kids' natural mattress. Burch ships right to your door. It sets up in minutes and it comes with 120 night risk-free trial. So if it is not for you, they will pick it up for free. You have

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I hate getting my blood drawn. The appointments are hard to get. It's hard to know what to test for. I always end up waiting so long. So it eats up so much of my day. And then they like stick this needle in your arm. And the whole thing is just miserable. it's terrible. I hate it. But knowing what is going on inside your body like your vitamin levels

and what your hormones are doing is so important to be able to make the right decisions for your health, including preemptively treating things that are coming down the line and identifying things that might not be making you feel as good as you could be feeling right now. Which is why I got so excited when I heard about rhythm. This is a home blood work test with zero pain. It feels genuinely too good to be true, but it is real. So I'm going to walk you through how this works because I was so nervous about it. They send you like a little envelope and in it, there's something that looks kind of like a continuous glucose monitor if you've seen that. And you put that on your arm and you press a button and it takes the tiniest vial of blood.

And I was like, there's this guy in the video and he's like, this doesn't hurt at all. And I was like, there is no way that this does not hurt, sir. But then I did it. You push the button. And actually, it genuinely did not hurt literally at all. I was so nervous. You can ask my entire team. I was messaging them before. I was like, I'm not sure I want to do this. I don't want to try it. But it was so painless. It was so easy, breezy. And then I got my data back. And I found out that I've gotten my APOB down from 125 to 79, which is crazy because that is one of the top heart health markers that doctors on this podcast say to look at. And also it's a really hard one to get doctors to order tests for. It's one of the main reasons why I went on my weight loss journey

in the first place. It's so, so important. And rhythm tests for it at home really, really easily. With rhythm, you can test every single month, easily, painlessly at home. So you can actually see how the changes that you're making are impacting your body. So you can stop wasting money or time on things that are not helping. And they test, like I said, they test these things that are really hard to get doctors to give you, like the APOB, and it really clearly breaks down your results. Like, this means this, and this is how you should interpret this, and this is what you should actually do about this.

It is a completely different relationship with your health. Rhythm is only $79 a month, which is a fraction of what traditional lab testing costs. It ships right to your door, and you can cancel any time. Right now, Rhythm is offering our listeners 15% off your first month and free shipping at Rhythm. dot health slash Liz Moody. And that is Rhythm with 1H. So it's RYTH dot health slash Liz Moody for 15% off your first month and free shipping. Stop guessing, start testing, rhythm. Dot health slash Liz Moody.