The Liz Moody Podcast - How I Learned to Love My Body—Shifting the Focus From Weight Loss to Balance with Fitty Britttty

Episode Date: October 20, 2021

Today we have a brand new episode of my How I Learned To Love My Body series featuring lovely Britney Vest, whom you might know as @fittybritttty. Britney is a fitness and wellness influencer and the founder of WVVY, a super cute line of size inclusive activewear. On this episode, we talk about: How to set boundaries around body and appearance conversations with family members How to overcome negative childhood body experiences Her weight loss experience and how that impacted her relationship with her body (in good and bad ways) How she switched from being focused on her weight to being focused on wellness as a whole How to love working out How to not compare your body to your friends’ How to balance plastic surgery and bodily changes with loving yourself I would love to hear what you learned listening to this episode, so definitely screenshot and tag me (@lizmoody) and Britney (@fittybritttty) on Instagram. PS: My Patreon is live! You can join Green Smoothie Society and get access to ALL of my green smoothie recipes and advice! Get all the deets at patreon.com/lizmoody. This episode is sponsored by Kyoto Botanicals, the first CBD brand I’ve recommended on this podcast! Right now, I’m loving their Warmth tincture, which has turmeric and cinnamon, and the Warmth balm, which is so helpful for headaches and sore muscles. You can get a whopping 25% off your order (AND they always have free shipping!) by using the code “HEALTHIERTOGETHER” at kyotobotanicals.com. This episode is sponsored by Nuzest, one of my favorite protein powders. It’s 98% digestible (a rarity in the protein powder space) and—get this—it actually tastes good. I recommend the Digestive Support Line—they have a Probiotic Vanilla and a Probiotic Cacao. You can use the code “LizHT” for 20% off your order on http://nuzest.us/LizHT. This episode is sponsored by Paleovalley, who make incredibly high quality supplements. If you’d like to check out their Turmeric Complex, Vitamin C, Neuroeffect, or any of Paleovalley’s other amazing products, head over to paleovalley.com and use the code LIZM for 15% off. Healthier Together cover art by Zack. Healthier Together music by Alex Ruimy. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Hello, friends, and welcome back to the Healthier Together podcast. I'm your host, Liz Moody, and I am a cookbook author and long-time journalist. Today we have a brand new episode of my How I Learn to Love My Body series featuring the lovely Brittany Best, whom you might know as at Fitty Briddy. Brittany is a fitness and wellness influencer and the founder of Wavy, a super cute line of size-inclusive active wear. On this episode, we really go into her journey from being weight loss, obsessed, to finding a more balanced, happy relationship with her body.

While there are so many life lessons to take from Brittany's story, I will say that we definitely discuss diet culture, over exercise, and weight, including specific numbers. If any of that is triggering to you, even in a story that ultimately ends in a more balanced place, I recommend maybe skipping this episode. There are plenty of other episodes to listen to and we'll be back with a fresh new episode next week. What I love about Brittany's story, though, is how much it highlights the gray areas of a lot of these topics. She went through a period where she was over-exercising, spending so much time at the gym that it was clearly unhealthy, and it led to some pretty devastating effects in our life, which we get into in the episode. But that same time period

also taught her to love working out and how it made her feel in her body. We talk a lot about her childhood and how her family raised her to have fairly negative thoughts about her body. And she shares how she's learned to draw boundaries over the years, but it's still an active process, something she works on regularly today. Same with her relationship with her body, whether it's in the context of dating or having friends who are smaller sizes. Brittany really highlights the ongoing process of all of it, the messy in-betweens, and I love this episode for that. If you'd like to hear more about amazing women and their relationships with their bodies, check out the rest of this series for sure. We have an episode with Achianguku, which will guarantee you.

to put a smile on your face, one with Megababe founder Katie Serino and a joint one with confident collective co-founders, Christina Zias, and Rayan Longas. And if you love this conversation or my How I Learn to Love Your Body Series generally, please share this episode with friends or people that you think would benefit from it. Or consider writing a super quick review on your favorite podcast platform. Both are really wonderful ways to help spread the word about the pod so I can continue to get amazing guests and do these types of interviews. And it is so very appreciated. All right, I love you. You're wonderful. And I hope that you love this episode with Brittany Vest. Brittany, thank you so much for joining me on the podcast today. I am so excited to chat. I was telling

you before we got on that I followed you for like, I don't even remember where you know, you usually kind of remember where you found somebody, but I feel like I've been following you for so long. I have no idea. I know exactly what you mean. Whenever I like meet someone in real life, I'm always like I know that I feel like I've known them my whole life and I can never pinpoint down like the moment that I started following them because I just feel like they've just always been there. We were talking about Olivia before this and she we were talking the other day, Olivia Nosaida and she was like, yeah, I'm so excited to like meet you when you come to New York in the fall. And I was like, whoa, I forgot that we had never met in real life. That's insane to me. Like it's just crazy how intimate you can feel with somebody.

I mean, I think it's one of the magical things about social media is that you can feel like you really know somebody without ever actually meeting them, you know? I totally agree. It's, it's super cool. I love that about Instagram. Well, let's go back to the beginning. So this is like a series that I like to do called How I Learn to Love My Body. And I think that we all have really interesting relationships with our body. Like I'm, I, people, I debated for a really long time whether I was going to call this how I learned to love my body. how I learned to accept my body, how I learned to be neutral about my body. But I always say that I chose love because love is a complicated relationship. Like some days it's good and some days it's bad, but it's deeper than any of those things. So I'm hoping to get into some of that depth here. So let's start with what was the attitude towards like bodies in your house growing up? Oh, I like I love that question. And first of all, let me go back for a second because I actually love that you pick the word love. for this series. I think it's perfect and couldn't agree more with you with what you had to say there. But I love this first question. I think growing up, so it kind of has to like go back to like my

grandparents in a way because my, I think that my mom had a lot of body issues from her mother. But I just from being little, I can remember going to Weight Watchers meetings with my mom going to work out with her at Jazzercise, like actually doing the workouts with her. And my dad had, he was a Marine. He was in the Marines for 30 years. He's retired now. But his job made, he had to get weighed for his job every couple months, I believe. And so I just remember him being a- Just to make, is it like to make sure you're like in good enough? Yeah, so he was a pilot and a officer as well in the Marines. And I think it had to do a lot because he was a pilot.

So probably knowing their weight for like flying. I'm actually, I'd have to ask him, he's visiting me right now. So I'll have to ask him about why it was the way it was. But I just remember. Yeah, that's so interesting. Yeah. Probably because they need to be in shape and be able to like, you know, protect our country. but I'm sure it had to do with probably like the plane and like knowing how much everything weighed.

I don't know. I'll have to ask him though. But I remember him being like literally in a frenzy whenever this was about to happen and like basically crash dieting and running a lot and, you know, all these things. And so I think there was always a emphasis on weight growing up in my household. And I was always from a young age told I was overweight even my mom took me to to one of my routine doctor appointments when I was a baby and told that I was overweight at that appointment and that I needed to switch off of like whole milk to skin milk. So that I guess technically

was my first diet when I was not even talking. So it definitely was an interesting experience growing up. I think there was a lot of emphasis on our bodies growing up in my household. A lot of comparison between my siblings and I am the oldest of four and I'm the oldest of three girls. So it was definitely an interesting dynamic. I was out of the three, out of my sisters and I, I was the only one that really struggled with their weight. And I was constantly reminded of that by whether it was by my parents or by my actual siblings. So it was an interesting like dynamic for sure. And I think a lot of it stems from like, you know, just going back in time, like I said, like through my grandparents and what they did, you know, to my parents and like my dad's job played a role in it.

And I think just our, the culture of when we were growing up in the 90s, there was diet culture was really like flourishing and just developing like crazy and growing and it was just everything. Like people lived and breed diet culture back then. How do you think that that impacted? your personality, like growing up having people talking about your weight all the time or being that person amongst your sisters? I'm sure it changed how I viewed my body. It changed how I felt about myself 100%. I think it also had me put a lot of value into my body into like the value of like, if you're smaller, you're more worthy type of type of thing. So I think that kind of got ingrained into me.

young age. But I also, I would care in the moment. I would be upset about it. And then it would kind of, I would be like, oh, whatever, you know, I don't know what to do about it because no one ever kind of gave me, like, when I was super young, there wasn't really anything other than like controlling what I was eating. Like, my parents wouldn't really let me snack and that kind of stuff. If I was hungry, I was only really allowed to eat during meal times. But then as I got older, I think they weren't home as much and I was maybe like eating so they would they would say you know blame me for like snacking and doing this and that but it was something in my head that I didn't know what to do like I never was told as I got older like how to properly nourish myself and like why I was feeling hungry all the time

or you know any of those things and so I'd be like I said upset in the moment and then the time would go by and I was kind of like well okay whatever I'm just going to go back to what I was doing and everything's fine. And I was kind of, I was kind of just a very happy go lucky kid, like, brushed it off. And it was just, you know, it was what it was. And I was just kind of like, this is who I am and this is what my body is like. And, you know, that it is what it is. And I just didn't think that I could change my situation. But it was like looking back on it, I didn't need to change a situation. I needed to change how I was, well, how my family was talking to me about it, but then how

I was also feeling towards myself and that it wasn't about the situation, but it was about learning to just accept and love who I was in that moment. But it's not something as a kid that you know how to process and deal with. Right, of course. Yeah. Did you ever, like, as an adult, have a conversation with your mom, or your dad about those childhood experiences? Oh, yes, I've had multiple conversations with them.

Still to this day, my mother is constantly still trying to lose weight. And I tell her all the time that, you know, I've tried to teach her all the things that I've learned. I've tried to tell her to set boundaries and be like, I do not want to have these conversations. I do not want to have a phone call and talk about what I've eaten all day or what you've eaten all day. I do not want to talk about our bodies like this, like in a negative way. It's literally every single time pretty much I talk to her, I have to remind her of the

boundaries that I've created for her. Is that like hard? Like I feel like so many people have would love to be able to do that with their mom or like have their mom not comment on their weight every time they talk. But it's so hard to put it into practice and people end up frustrated. Oh, yeah. I think for me it was just I couldn't. take it anymore and I was getting so frustrated and I probably knowing me I like kept it in kept

it in and then one time she just set me off which mothers know how to do and I just kind of probably blurted out to her like I don't don't I'm not going to talk to you anymore if you talk to me about these things and I was very serious and I was very stern and I was like it's not healthy for you to be like obsessing about your body it's not healthy. for me to have these conversations. And I was kind of just like, I don't want to talk to you about these things. Like, this is not something I care about. It's not like something that I want to consume my mind with.

And even though she always says at every conversation ends and she's like, you're right, like, you know, we shouldn't be talking about these things. There's so many other things going on in our lives that are more important. and she's always like saying okay like I'm not going to you know do it anymore and then it happens still pretty often to be honest um so it's just an interesting thing where and it's something that I have to do with my entire family like I tell my sisters like it's an off-limit topic um and my sisters are a little bit more respectful with it I even have had to tell my dad about stuff too. Like he he he, I catch him complimenting my sister's, uh, appearances often. Um,

and I'm just like I, on a vacation years ago, I was like, uh, I blurted out to him that he needs to stop telling my sister how skinny, how skinny they look. And I was just like, this is just absurd. You're feeling like they have their, my youngest sister has her own like issues with like bodies dysmorphia and that kind of stuff. And she just like, it fuels her fire. when she hears that she looks skinny. And I had to tell him, I was like, you have no right to compliment or tell them what their bodies are looking like. Stop talking about their bodies.

And especially stop talking about it in front of me. I just like, I really laid down the law with him. And he has been way more like receptive to the feedback. But he is also the only one of my family who like goes to therapy and does that kind of stuff. So I think he's a little bit like just more aware of that kind of stuff. I love men who are in therapy. It's like my favorite category of men. Yeah. I think it's, I mean, he went a lot. He went through a lot in the Marines. So he definitely could use it. But yes, it's good that he is doing that. And yeah, it's a, it's a tough thing. And I think once I said it the first time, it's been a lot easier for me to

say every other time. So do you think it's just a, about like reiterating and reiterating and reiterating and like letting go of the fact that it's frustrating for you to have to keep doing that? Yeah, at this point now, it's more of just a blanket statement. I remind them. I say, look, I'm going to have to get off this phone call or I'm going to have to leave whatever we're doing if these conversations are going to continue. I've already told you, you know, I'm uncomfortable with this and I don't want to be talking about are my body, your body, what you're eating today, what you're having eaten today. It's like this is the price of access to me.

Exactly. Exactly. And they, they, at that, in the moment, they usually are respectful and are like, okay, and subject changes. And, you know, it's just, I am aware now, too, that these conversations happen because of their insecurities with their own bodies. But yeah, absolutely. My boundaries are set because I won't.

want to help them see how much they're actually talking about their bodies in a negative way. And for them to know that I don't, I don't view my body as negative ever or not ever. Of course, I have my hard days with body image. But even on my hard days, I try not to sit there and pick myself apart because that's just never helpful. It's just, it's going to lead to a downward spiral into this. It just leads you into a very dark place. So what about on like a personal level? Like did you have to work to like did you have anger about the fact that you had to learn how to treat your body this way and to treat yourself this way yourself and that these were the messages that they gave you for your childhood? Like how did you move how did you move through the emotions around that? Oh yeah. Yeah. I definitely was angry. I was like I'd get so mad when I was younger and like cry and be like why did God like.

make me like different than my siblings and like have to be quote unquote fat and you know why am I not this like perfect skinny person and honestly like now I'm able to like zoom out from all of those emotions and see like I was like this was my path I view life and like God as a like my life has a purpose and I have a, you know, a journey that I'm supposed to go on and everything happens for a reason. And when I was younger, I couldn't see why I was different, basically. And now I can see kind of like my purpose in life or what I feel is my purpose is to speak on these things and help other women, you know, learn to love themselves, learn to appreciate. their bodies, learn to set boundaries with other people in their life and learn to, you know,

that it's okay to be different. It's beautiful to be different. And that being curvier or heavier overweight or in a very healthy weight range, whatever that is, to learn to love and accept your body because it's working so hard for you every single day to make you a person that you're supposed to be. I really believe that without, you know, if I, I was born and I was born maybe like my sisters, I wouldn't be in this position, in this career, in this life that I'm living that I'm like so like eternally grateful for. So as hard as it was and as angry as I was when I was younger, I'm like very grateful for all the like struggles that I went through and even grateful for like the way I was talked to

and all the things that were quote unquote bad that happened in my childhood. I learned so much from those things. And like now I get the opportunity, well, hopefully I get the opportunity to have a baby one day and to be able to raise them in a very different way with love and understanding. And the fact that like your body obviously is very important. Every person should value their body, but it doesn't need to have emphasis on what your outside form looks like so much. You're listening to the Healthier Together podcast. The mattress that you sleep on is one of the highest exposures that you have.

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podcast. Again, that's K-Y-O-T-O-B-T-A-N-I-C-A-A-N-I-C-A. Kiyototanicals.com and the code is healthier together. I cannot wait for you to try these. They are truly going to change your life. Now, let's get back to the episode. So at one point, you like all of your, I actually wasn't following you at this point. I don't know when it was, but all of your like website and about pages, like you transformed your life by losing 85 pounds. When was that in your journey and what sort of like was the impetus for that? basically I was overweight my whole childhood and I was still a very active child. I was on a year-round swim team. I would sometimes swim twice a day for four hours total. I was on a soccer team,

a travel soccer team. It was very active. I've always loved food, always been a good eater, that type of thing. So when I got to, and when I look back at photos, mind you, I really wasn't even that overweight. But I think compared to my siblings and compared to, you know, everything that was going on in the 90s and early 2000s with body image, I was considered very overweight slash obese. And I honestly think that hearing that as a kid and as a preteen and teenager really made it almost worse for me because I think if I was just left alone and, you know, encouraged to eat nutritious things and to be mindful of, you know, my hunger cues and different ways of going about it. I don't know if I would be maybe if I would have gotten to the

point where I got to in college. So I went to college and I had all this freedom and we went to party and drink and eat out at all hours of the night and all that. And then I had a boyfriend who, also love to eat and all that. And the weight just kind of kept coming on and coming on. And I was barely working out. I wasn't on any sports teams in college or anything like that. And I think the only workouts I would ever do was like walking to school to classes and like dancing at fraternity parties and that kind of thing. And then when I got out of college, I found myself to be around like 250 pounds and I finally got like a job and I didn't know how to be an adult. I didn't know how to cook for myself every day and was barely like figuring out how to like pay bills and you know

do all the things that you get thrown into when you're transitioning from college to a job. So I was eating out all the time going to you know, Chipotle and like all these different places. Like eating out like twice a day at least probably. And yeah, I just kind of like was just gaining weight very quickly. And then the boyfriend that I had in college, he, like, we were living kind of far apart at that point because of our jobs. And I went to visit him one day and he was like basically told me that I was fat and I needed to lose weight. And I was just very like appalled and shocked and just like he had never said anything about me and my weight before. horror, blah, blah, blah. So I broke up with him. I was really hoping that would be part of the story.

Broke up with him that night, drove home, like, bawling, like got a speeding ticket driving home. I was like a mess. And I kind of like sat in my feels for a couple of days. And then I literally woke up one morning. And I know this is like so annoying because I used to hate when people say this as well. But I woke up one morning a couple days later and was just like so pissed. and was just like a fire was lit inside me. It was like a light switch went off. And I was like, okay, I'm going to change my life. I'm going to, as the kids would say now, I'm going to become that girl.

And I remember driving over to my mom's house. She lived like 15 minutes away for me at the time to my parents' house. Got in the house and was like, okay, mom, like, I'm going to wait watchers on whatever. I don't know. I think it was like on Monday. I'm going to Weight Watchers. You know, do you want to come with me? Blah, blah, blah, blah.

Because we had always growing up, gone to Weight Watchers meetings together. And so I asked if she wanted to come with me. She was like, yeah, she was like, okay, we'll start Monday. And I was like, no, I'm going to the meeting on Monday, but I am starting right now. Like, I already started my changes because I kind of, like, knew what to do from previous, like, Weight Watchers experiences.

So I, which I had never done. Like, my mom is always the mom that was, or always the person who was like, oh, yeah, we'll start Monday with any kind of diets. So, yeah, from that point on, I went to a Weight Watcher meeting every week for, I think, like almost two years, maybe like a year and a half to two years. And I started the first like three to four months. I just sort of like was really focusing on my diet, what I was putting into my body, like, really following like the Weight Watcher plan, which isn't really a plan, but, you know,

like counting the points and that kind of stuff and watching my portions. And I had her, I was living with my best friend at the time. And she loved working out. And she would ask me every single day, do you want to go to the gym? Do you want to go to the gym? Do you want to go to the gym? And I finally, after a couple months of switching my eating habits, I said, okay, let me go to the gym. Even though I hated the gym, I hated working out. But I was like, I'm going to have to start going to the gym where I'm going to get in a plateau. Or maybe I was in a plateau and that's what convinced me. I can't quite remember. So yeah, I started going to the gym and it really freaking sucked at first, like really bad. Like I basically dragged myself to the dren every,

pretty much every day just to even just walk for 30 minutes. And then I decided that I would hire a personal trainer. And that's kind of like when things got way more. serious for me. I joined some challenge that the gym was doing and he the trainer actually was we got, we ended on bad terms because he actually tried to convince me to take like, what are those like those diet pills? Oh God. Yeah. And I was like, how dare you, you're a trainer and why would you ever tell me like to do I was a thing God educated a little bit on that kind of stuff. But if any other person would have come under that, they probably would have done that. And, and who knows what kind of path I would have gone down.

But thank God I knew better. So, but that, his, he kind of got me into like, likey working out. I will say that. It started off really, like, rough with him. And then I, like, actually started looking forward to my workout. So once he wanted me on diet pills, though, I was like, I fired him, moved gyms, and got another trainer. And slowly I just started loving working out, like to the point where I was becoming obsessed

with working out. Like I was in the gym like two hours, two and a half hours a day. I just, I really loved it. It was like all I did. It was like I would go to work, go to the gym, shower, eat dinner and watch some TV, go to bed and repeat. What did you love about it? Like did you love the endorphins that you got from doing it?

Or was it like more about you like the results who were getting? Yeah. I think I was liking the results. I was feeling really strong. I was like able to sprint like at 11.0, 12.0. And I was with my trainer and we were doing sprints. And some of his friends came into the gym and they were like pulled him aside and they were like, oh, is she like a track runner, blah, blah, blah.

And he came over to me and was like, oh, they were asking if you were like a track athlete. And I was like, oh, I was laughing. I was like, what are they talking about? I don't look like a track athlete. I was like, I have big thighs. Like what are they? You know, he was like, what? you actually really do look like one.

And to think, like, I used to be able to run that fast is wild. Like, I definitely don't run that fast anymore. But it was just stuff like that that was really motivating and really, like, gave me this, like, high that I had never felt before. It was like a very kind of like the high that you get from when you're losing weight and you see those scale go down. And you're like, oh, like, fuck yes. Like, let's keep going.

Like, I've got this. Another pound down. another pound down. Like, it's like that like feeling of probably like what someone feels like when they're on drugs. I don't know. I've never done drugs. But it really forever changed my view on on movement. And obviously through the years, my idea of movement and the way I move my body has changed so much.

I don't work out like a gym rat anymore. But I definitely enjoyed that process. And anyway, so yeah, I lost 80s. 85 pounds through changing my, my diet, what I was putting into my body and then also by working out a lot. I think that I got to a point though, like I said, where I was definitely like over exercising. And I was at the point in Weight Watchers where I just wanted to get to my goal weight. So anyone's new to Weight Watchers, they create a goal weight for you that is in a quote unquote healthy range, body weight range for your height. And I was struck. I was

struggling to get like the last five pounds off. And I was just annoyed and frustrated. And honestly, in my head, I was like, I just wanted to see the number once that they had set for me. Even if it was an unrealistic number for my body, I just was like, I have to see this number. And I just have to just get that gold star and then I can be done. Then I can relax. Then I can just chill. And I did everything in my power to do it in what I thought was a healthy way. And And at that point, I was so annoyed that it wasn't happening that I just stopped eating. I was like, I think I was literally drinking a giant Diet Coke and working out for multiple hours a day.

And it came to the point, it was only about a week of that, I would say, came to a point where I almost fainted in a shower at the gym. And I was like crouching down in a shower, like about to faint. And then I was like, okay, this is absolutely insane. I wasn't even like drinking water. Like it was so weird. When I like think back about that, like it's it's just truly crazy. You're just like what was I doing?

Yeah, exactly. But you know, I think God was able to come out of it. And I weighed in at Weight Watchers like that night that that happened. I still went to my Weight Watchers meeting. And I weighed the goal wait. And I was, I think I didn't even stay for the meeting. Didn't stay for the applause. didn't stay for any of it, which was very unlike me.

I really, like, loved the round of applause you would get at the meetings for getting another gold star or whatever, reaching your goal. And I was just so hungry, so fed up, so sick that I got my star, didn't tell my, like, instruct, like my meeting leader, didn't go in, left. There was a Chipotle, like, around the corner in the same center. and I literally have never weighed that weight again in my life. Wow. I was just like, that was it one day.

You're like that's cool. One day. Yeah. But yeah, it was just it was and I've done so much work obviously since that point because that was like kind of a low for me. Whereas a lot of people would say, oh, you know, you accomplished this huge thing. And everyone was congratulated me and I was, I thought happy. and I was just like confused because then I was like, okay, well, okay, I got to this point.

Well, now what do I do? Like, no one really prepared me for what maintenance was going to be like. No one prepared me for like any of it, any of the after of losing. Like I was like a champion at losing weight. And I was not a champion at maintaining my weight loss. So then I went through many years of gaining and losing weight and gaining weight and losing weight. and yeah, and then I actually started a Fitty Bertie in my Instagram account and my blog because I wanted, I was so sick of feeling out of control and imbalance.

And I wanted to figure out how to live without becoming obsessed, without, you know, over-exercising, without starving myself, about all the negativity I was bringing into my life with, you know, the way I would talk to myself was just absolutely horrible. My inner dialogue was just nasty. And I was like, I'm sick of how this, like, what's happening right now. And I just want to live in this like free, like I wanted to find freedom and balance is what my goal was when I started my Instagram. And I, yeah, so I started it. And I was just kind of sharing like my, my story. I did share like my trans, quote unquote, transformation and that's kind of like how I grew my account and I was very focused on weight loss

still I was still like trying to lose 20 pounds or you know I don't know I was honestly I was still very focused on weight loss up until I like when I moved to LA so about a year after a year and a half or so after I started my account I was heavily focused on weight loss I was still trying to lose weight. I wasn't even like following why I started the page. I don't know. But it all led me to where I am today, which is good. It was just a very up and down journey. And honestly, it still is. Like there's still things that I'm working on constantly. I just always think like it's a never-ending journey in my mind. You know, it's, there's always going to be something. You're listening to the healthier together podcast.

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And of course, I've got an amazing deal for you. Head over to newses.us.us.us.us slash Lizh T and use code Liz M for 20% off your order. Again, that's New Zest, N-U-Z-E-S-T, dot U.S. slash LizH-T, and the code is LizM for 20% off your order. I cannot wait for you to try this protein powder. I know you're going to be as obsessed as I am. Now, let's get back to the episode. So what changed when you moved to L.A.? Like, what inspired you to take a different approach to your relationship with your body? When I got to L.A. and I started going to yoga, I experienced what it's like to take a yoga class

where the teachers speak from their hearts on your body and all the things that your body is doing for you to be able to get into these poses. And it was such a different way of thinking about my body. And I just like fell in love with the feelings that yoga gave me. Like whether it was that I was feeling really strong in yoga or whether it was the teacher who really inspired me and made me feel good and safe in my body just by like sharing a story about, you know, their day or whatever they were speaking on. And I just started going to yoga like every single day, I think. I used to go to yoga like six days a week. And I just couldn't get enough of it. And I realized through yoga, I used to go and sit in the back of the class and I would wear, you know, I would cover up my body.

And I was like, I wouldn't really look at myself in the mirror. And slowly over time, I realized like one day I was sitting in front, with just a sports run leggings on. And I was like, oh my God, like I'm in the front of a yoga class. What is going on right now? Like I realized like I felt so much more confident. I'm so much more in love with my body through my yoga practice. And yeah, I really think that without yoga and without the amazing teachers that I had,

I don't think that I would view my body the way that I've been. my body right now. It definitely like completely changed my mindset. I also think too, I at that point was meeting a lot of different people in L.A. And it was just the conversations in the wellness community were just very eye-opening to me. Like I really had never, I had been in the gym culture before and I had, you know, eaten chicken, rice and broccoli and I had done meal prepping and I had you know, done all those things. I lost weight. I learned to love the gym, all this stuff. But when I got to LA, it was such a different conversation. It was, you know, wellness as a whole, not just weight loss or not just a number on the scale. It was like, you know, are you taking vitamins? Are you having,

you know, a spiritual, like, wellness? Are you doing meditation? Are you doing yoga? Um, Are you drinking water, you know, enough water? Are you getting facials and massage? Like, it was just like all these things that L.A. has that everywhere else probably has these things. Like I was living in a big city before moving to L.A. I was living in Washington, D.C. But I just think being surrounded by other people who were constantly talking about it because I did a lot of work when I moved here to build relationships and find friends. And I found myself in the influencer world here. And I was going to all these. events and I was just meeting so many people and following them and just learning like all these different things. And it was just, yeah, I think it happened in a way where I wasn't even like necessarily trying to change. But I realized one day when I was with a bunch of my friends, I was like, you guys, like, I've never not posted a transformation Tuesday post since starting my account. And I was like, I don't want to post these posts anymore. Like I don't even relate to this anymore.

And they were like, well, then why do you post them? Like, just don't post it anymore. And I was like, well, I feel like everyone follows me for this. Like, they, they all need, like, motivation. And, like, if I'm not doing this, like, why is anyone going to want to follow me anymore? And then I just was like, well, you know what? Fuck it. Like, I'm just, I'm not relating to it.

It's not authentic anymore. And so, yeah, I just stop posting. Like, I stopped posting. posting anything about weight loss pretty much on my page. And I don't even know. I was just like posting about just what I was doing every day. I just kind of moved into more of a lifestyle point of view on Instagram and my blog and that kind of stuff. And I just knew at that point like I had to follow my gut and just it was it was a huge step for me to be honest because it was like me publicly saying without saying, like, I'm not going to talk about this stuff

anymore. And I think by not talking about it literally every single day, every week, it released a lot of pressure in my body and mind to have to feel like I still needed to lose weight. Do you feel like, like, as your website says, like, that losing weight transformed your life? or do you think that like now that your weight, like doesn't define you or doesn't define your life? Like where does it sit? I think that it's still, I still do think that losing the weight did change me and transform my life because it allowed me to get to this place of where I feel free now, even though maybe I don't weigh 160 pounds right now, obviously.

But I also feel like I said before, everything happens for a reason. And so without those, without me going through my weight loss, without me losing that 85 pounds, without me going through all the highs and the lows of that process, I wouldn't be where I am today, which is, was the ultimate goal, which was to feel free, to feel in love with my body, to accept my body how it is and be grateful for it. Do you, so where are you like, what's your workout philosophy these days and what's your food philosophy these days? So my workout philosophy right now is to move. I move my body out of love and I do workouts that I love. So I right now, my goal is to workout around three days a week.

Sometimes it happens. Sometimes it doesn't. I just recently moved and bought a house. And so my workout routine has been pretty non-existent because it's been a lot of stress. and I definitely like I used to hold a lot of value and put a lot of guilt into missing workouts. I guess more guilt was there. Like I would set a goal and I would be like, okay, I'm going to work out five times this week. And if I didn't, I would feel so guilty and such a mess about it. And now if I work out three days a week or if I don't, it's fine.

Like obviously I love working out still. So I miss it when I'm not doing it. and this week was my first week of like getting into more of a routine finally again. But my goal is about three to four days of like true workouts. And then other days that I'm not like maybe doing a full on workout, it's, you know, walking my dog mango on a long walk or going by the beach to have a walk. And some days it means just doing nothing, honestly, because maybe my day is like packed with a bunch of work and I just would rather take a long shower or bath. and just relax.

And that's kind of what's going on with my workout. And then... Wait, can I ask, just like as a follow-up there, you say you still like really love working out. And I think a lot of people listening, like, I work out. I don't know if I love it. Like, I have to talk myself into doing it pretty much every time I do it. I love how I feel after, I guess.

And I'm curious because you had some sort of like more disorder thoughts around working out back in the old days when you had a less healthy relationship with your body. So like now if somebody's listening in there, like, I want to love working out, but I don't want to love it in a negative way or like love that reinforcement in a negative way. Like what can you tell us? Like how can you make me love working out? How can you rub that off on me and like a healthy way? Okay. So I think finding movement that you love, like that you literally have so much fun doing.

And I know you're probably, everyone's probably listening thinking like this girl's crazy. Like no one love to move their body. but really like yoga like literally makes me so happy like when I finally got to go to a yoga class after quarantine I could like I almost cried because I was just like so happy to be like back on my mat with other people like nearby and just have that energy I also think too like you mentioned that feeling of the after you work out and how good you feel like the days that I struggle to work out I think about that I think all my way to my work I'm like, I'm going to just feel so bomb.

I'm going to feel so confident. I'm going to just feel amazing because that's what I feel like when I leave a workout. And it helps me to get to my workout sometimes. And I also think, I know that these are like things that you could probably read, you know, anywhere, but these are the things that work for me. Having a workout buddy or a friend who loves to work out too makes it a lot easier. Because if you don't want to work out, they probably will. And they're going to be like, hey, where you're at?

Like one of my best friends, Shayla, she loves working out, probably more than me. And every week on Sundays, she texts me pretty much and says, hey, these are the workouts I booked this week. Let me know what do you want to join for? And I'm like some weeks, everybody needs that. Some weeks I'm like, oh, yeah, like I'll come on this day and this day. And other weeks, I'm like, yeah, that's going to be a no for me. I'm just not going to be able to make it to any of these. But literally she shows up on every Sunday pretty much and sends me her little schedule.

And it makes it so much easier for me. And plus, then I get to see my friend multiple times throughout the week. And yeah, if you can find someone like that or if your partner loves to work out and wants to work out with you. I also think it's like more bonding to like work out with a friend than it is to like even go get a drink or get dinner or something like that because you're doing an activity to get. So it feels more connected, you know? 100%. Yeah, I love that. Okay, so what's your eating philosophy these days?

So right now I am and I call myself an intuitive eater. I truly, again, probably going to be hard to believe, but I actually really love vegetables. Like, I think I've always liked them. I've always like salads. But as I've gotten older, I love like broccoli, cauliflower, salads. Anything roasted, I'm like totally. game for. I cannot wait to eat it. And again, obviously I have my days where I don't want to eat my vegetables. But I love veggies. So I try to, you know, follow what I love to eat. And I also love

like Mexican food. And I'll make a lot of like Mexican food. But I throw like veggies also like Brussels sprouts in with my taco meat and like that kind of stuff. So I just try to like follow my my gut kind of like with what sounds good to me and just I end up loading up on veggies and I still eat like pretty much every food group. I don't have a lot of people seem to have a lot of food allergies these days and I don't know. I just think I'm lucky I guess and I don't have any food allergies that I'm aware of. Also I think the thing nobody talks about about vegetables is the more that you eat vegetables, the more that you crave vegetables. So like if you eat it for a little bit and then you'll be like oh my god i just want brussels sprouts or i just want

i also think it's the way like people cook stuff like i'm not just like boiling my vegetables like i like take i season my stuff i like crisp it up and like i cook it in like a really well what i think is really good and you can make veggies in like so many cool ways now that i just i don't know i as you guys can probably see, like I'm excited about vegetables. But I say that with hand-in-hand. Like, I love veggies, but I also love food that is quote unquote bad. I don't like to put labels on food, which is like why I say I'm an intuitive eater because I just, there's no good and bad food. Like it's all food.

If it fuels your soul, if you love it, like I love Mexican food, then it's making me happy. It's nourishing me for that what I need. for that day. And if the next day I wake up and like, you know, I'm craving a salad or in fruit and whatever else, like, then that's what I'm going to eat. And I go to the grocery store like once a week and I usually like plan out some meals that sound good. But like if it doesn't sound good later that week, then maybe I'll go eat something out or maybe I'll order something into the house. And I just try not to. So I did about, gosh, I'm almost. two years ago now. I did say I announced on my Instagram that I won't be dieting and I don't.

I tell people all the time because when I share food stuff, so many people will message me with what are the macros, what are the calories, what are the fat, blah, blah, blah, all these questions. And I'm like, hi, I'm not a nutritionist. I don't track macros. I don't count calories. I don't diet. like this food is the food that sounded good for me for dinner tonight and that's what I'm eating. And it's hard. I actually pull away a lot from sharing food because it brings up so many questions. And because I was a weight loss account prior and I never changed my handle or anything like that, I still have a lot of people following me who, you know, are dieting and I have no like judgment or anything towards anyone who wants to diet. If it is done in a healthy way, I 100% support it.

If it is done in a way where you're not being tearing yourself apart and thinking that on the other side of weight loss is happiness, then I am here for you. I applaud you and I support it. And I, who knows if one day maybe I will want to go on a journey like that again. But for me, if I ever do go on a journey of weight loss again in my life, it will be done. from a place of love and not hatred towards myself. I know there's a really big controversy. Not really big. There's really big things going on in the world,

but there is some controversy in the body positive, body neutrality community about weight loss. And there's like this part of that world where people think that if you love your body, then you shouldn't want to lose weight. and I just don't agree with that. I think you can love your body and still want to make different decisions with your body. I think it's such that's such a personal, it's such a personal thing. And I know everyone has different goals and things in mind and health things.

And I recently went and got blood done after years and not having it done. And like I have higher cholesterol. So I have to make different. And I've had, I've struggled with higher cholesterol throughout my heart. my life, even as a kid and that kind of stuff. So I have to be making different decisions with the type of food I eat. I can't be eating as many things with red meat, for example, and that kind of stuff. And so those are changes that I'm making for my health. And, you know, everyone has a different idea of what their health needs to look like. And so if that means making changes to your food and

your exercise and it's going to result in some weight loss and you're doing it out of love and and care for yourself and you're not tearing yourself apart and restricting yourself and being unhealthy during that process, I think it's amazing. You're listening to the Healthier Together podcast. When I worked as a magazine editor, I wrote more than a thousand articles about turmeric because pretty much all of the doctors that I used as sources kept recommending it or citing it is one of the supplements that they would personally take. Here's the background.

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amazing products, head over to paleovali.com and use the code Liz M for 15% off. That's paleovalley.com and code Liz M for 15% off your order. And if you have any questions, feel free to hit me up on Instagram. I love chatting about this stuff. Now, let's get back to the episode. What about with dating relationships? Like you had like the asshole guy who you broke up with. But since then, how has your relationship with your body impacted dating and relationships? Oh my gosh. So I think when I was younger, I'm in my 30s and I lost the weight. So I lost weight when I was in my young 20s.

I think I was like, or early 20s, I should say, I think it was like 24 or 25. And after I lost the weight, I didn't date anyone while I was losing weight. I didn't like go on dates. I don't that I can remember. But once I lost weight, I also like during the weight loss, I like didn't see my friends, didn't socialize, like cut myself off in the world. Again, not healthy. Wouldn't recommend. So once I lost weight and I felt like I could let go a little bit. I started going out with friends and that kind of thing. And I definitely like was dating and doing that kind of stuff. And I think I just felt like super, super confident then. I, I've always been kind of confident, but I just had like extra confidence and I just really wasn't concerned that much.

I think I, I think it was like I knew that I was going to have to have a conversation and I still would have to have a conversation probably about like my body journey just because it's such a big part of who I am. And obviously like if they so and now it's like it's hard because anyone who dates me can go online and find out so much about me. So yeah, but I don't think it bothered me at all back in the day. Now, ever since coming to L.A., I don't, I really haven't dated that much, which I keep telling my friends, I'm like, I need to get like back out there and like start dating. But it's a question that comes up constantly on Instagram for me about dating and being in like, you know, a bigger body, a curvier body. I give it so many questions about this.

And I totally get like that it's hard and uncomfortable. And I think women just overthink a lot of things when it comes to dating and maybe having sex and that kind of thing. And honestly, I think I got like the best advice. I can't even remember who told me this, but it's just like always stuck with me. But it's like no guy when you're in the bedroom is really going to care about that stuff. Like they're just not. They're going to be so excited that they're with you and like whatever is. happening in the room that they're not thinking about, you know, your cellulite or your stretch marks

or anything like that. They're just thinking like, oh my gosh, yes, this is about to happen. And I was like, oh my God, you're right. Like if a guy is literally like, you know, with you and thinking about those things, like thinking about your stretch marks, like cellulite and that's going to trip him up, like, that is not the guy for you and you need to run. And I was just like, ever since someone told me that, I was just like, yeah, like this guy, whoever, you know, is going to be that guy is going to be damn lucky, stretch marks, cellulite, loose skin, whatever and all to have me in his bed, like, or whatever. And I just from then on have always just felt like, you know, like they're not going to look at that kind of stuff.

And so I always tell people that. I'm like, no guy, like the right guy is not going to look at this stuff, not going to care, like not even going to cross his mind. Well, I also think that referring to it as the right guy is important because I think we talked about this in the happiness episode of the podcast, but the psychologist that I was interviewing was like dating isn't like you trying to impress another person. It's two people trying to find a good match. And so it's not like you trying to look your best to woo a person. It's you trying to find a good match for you and them trying to find a good match for them. And your best match will be somebody you present your whole self to, you know? Yeah, I totally agree with that. I think that as a woman, I feel like it's always like, well, you have, the woman has to do all these things and do everything right and not be too much and not be too little and all these things. And it's like, no, because they're eventually going to see the real me.

And I am going to be too much and too dramatic and to all these things eventually. So why should I try to, you know, cover those things up and not be who I am? because no matter what, they're going to see it sooner or later. Like, it's not going to be, like, hidden forever. I think I totally agree with that. I think, like, looking at it as, I like to look at dating as just like, hey, can I have a good conversation? Can this person be my friend?

Can they, you know, could I trust them? Could I, like, tell them my secrets and feel like they can hold those for me and make me feel feel safe and make me feel not judged. And I try to think about those things more than being concerned with my body. I do think that especially in LA, you know, it's a little hard to not want to compare yourself and do this and that. And like, even with my own friend group, like, I'm still one of the only girls that's like super curvy, like size 1214. Most of my friends are probably like a size too. I think taking the comparison away is something I usually try to remind people to do as well. I know. I think it's funny that you found that you found like happiness in your body in L.A.

Because L.A. is the hardest city for me looks wise. Like I feel like I can feel like a hot ass bitch. And then I'll go to L.A. and I'll be like, oh my God, should I get plastic surgery? Should I lose all this weight? Like it makes me feel so bad about myself as a city. I know. It is hard because it is all around. And I just think that you're, you're drawn, though, to the people, like, the people that are in my life are all, like, amazing people who would never, like, no one that I'm friends with makes me feel like that about my body or myself or anything like that. There are people, though, that really get into, like, all the stuff that L.A. has to offer. And I think it's just about finding those people who are maybe not into that kind of thing if you're not into that kind of thing. So like I've had- Like you found your community.

Yeah, I found my community. And I feel like my girls in my community are very non-judgmental. And everyone does what they want to do to feel good, though. You know, like I get my hair colored and I'm not against plastic surgery at all. I've had two very major plastic surgeries in my life. You had a skin removal, right? And then what was the other one? I had a breast augmentation when I was super young as well when I was a freshman in college.

And I had a breast reduction, I should say, not augmentation. Oh, those are opposite. Yes, those are very opposite. I realize it as it came out of my mouth. I had a breast reduction. I've always, my whole family has really big boobs. And it was actually covered. It was a medically, almost completely covered surgery.

Oh, that's nice. So I was having some horrible backneck issues and all that. So what do you think is the line between wanting to change things to love yourself more and the work of sort of loving yourself as who you are? For me, it's not like a surgery is going to change your happiness long term. It could change how you feel about yourself short term. you could wake up from your surgery, you know, not have skin on your stomach and you can feel like amazing. And then a couple weeks after goes by, whatever, a year, two years, and maybe

you're still miserable with yourself. And it's because the work wasn't done on yourself, on the inner work. You might have gone and fixed yourself outwardly to feel better, to feel happier. And you're still a mess on the inside. So for me, me, if you're doing plastic surgery because you are so miserable or unhappy with something on your body, and you're expecting that to be your solution of happiness, I think that's more of an issue. Then maybe you're unhappy with your body. Like I didn't like my extra skin. And I said, okay, if I can lose weight and I keep the weight off and I find this healthy place

to kind of stabilize at, I'll go to a doctor and see, like, is this even extra skin? Is this even something that I, or is it just like a, I was very torn on, is this like a cop out? Is this even extra skin? Is it just fat? And do I still need to lose weight? I'll never forget the first time I went to a consultation. I was literally like broken out and like crazy like hives because I was so nervous of what the doctor was going to tell me.

And every doctor I saw like four doctors said the same. thing, that it was all extra skin and that it was, you know, it wasn't going to go away. And so I was like, okay, like, I was fine. I went on several vacations pre-skin removal and wore bikinis and did my thing. And I waited a while. I had my consultations and I waited months before actually pulling the trigger because I wanted to make sure I was in a place that this wasn't going to be the answer to my problems. It wasn't going to change things magically for me. It was going to remove my skin and that was what it was going to do. And so for me, I told myself, like, I wasn't going to allow myself to have this procedure done until I knew

that it wasn't like a happiness procedure for me. Because I was also having issues with my skin was interfering with my workouts. It was creating rashes. I was having like medical things as well. So for me it was the alleviation of the medical things. Like my stomach wasn't going to hang on the ground when I did planks anymore. It wasn't going to bother me when I went on a run, which I really enjoyed doing. and that kind of stuff.

And so for me, it was more how can I alleviate some pain I'm in? And then also, yes, of course, I knew it was going to give me that flat stomach that I had always dreamed of. But my mental state wasn't dependent on the flat stomach for happiness. Could you leave us with just like one tip or one takeaway that could help somebody listening, love or accept their body? I think my biggest takeaway for someone who really, really wants to work on loving their body is, I think it's doing a gratitude journal, to be honest. And I think it's also maybe creating boundaries, which is something I've talked about.

I think creating boundaries, gratitude, and if you feel called for yoga, it really helped me so much. I think I used to have such different thoughts of yoga than what I do now. And truly gratitude, yoga and boundaries have been my biggest game changers, the biggest things that have helped me. And also, I know this is more than one thing, but comparison, trying, trying your hardest not to compare your life with someone else's because you really don't know what's going on. you really don't know what's happening in someone else's life. You don't know why someone looks the way they look, acts the way they act, none of it. So, and I think- Is that how you stop with comparison?

Like when you find yourself comparing yourself to other people, do you just sort of repeat that as a mantra? Like, I don't know what's really going on in your life. Yeah. I try to when I do compare because you just don't know. You don't know. And a picture, maybe, you know, pictures and videos are going to tell us some, but people don't share everything. And you don't know if that person maybe just went through a breakup.

You don't know if they just got diagnosed with some sort of horrible cancer. You don't know if a family member just passed. You don't know if maybe they just got some great news. You just don't know what's going on in someone's life. And I constantly am reminding myself of that if I'm, if I have ever. feel like I'm comparing my life with someone else is. If people wanted to keep up with you on your beautiful journey, where's the best place to find you?

So I am most active on my Instagram, which is Fitty-Briti. And you can also find me on my blog. You can read a lot more about my journey on my blog, which is just FittyBriti.com. You have like a whole FACU and like a whole long thing about the skin removal thing. Yeah. people are interested in that particularly. Yeah. I love to be a resource for that since it's actually not that talked about.

It was really hard to find any information when I was going through it. So I'm always happy to help answer questions. And honestly, there's like so much information in those blog posts. So, but yeah, those are the places that I feel like you're also in TikTok. I feel like I follow you on TikTok. Yeah, I'm on TikTok. I haven't been as active there. But I plan to get back, get back over there.

Yes. I miss my little, my TikTok besties. Yeah. Well, amazing. Thank you so much for taking the time to chat today. Yeah, this was such a good chat. Thanks for having me. I hope you loved this episode with Brittany.

I hope that you took a lot from it, whether you're going to maybe start to draw some new boundaries with your own family, with people in your life, whether you're going to try out yoga. Gosh, she like really made me want to go to yoga class just talking to her. So I hope you loved it. and I hope you took away a lot from it. Both of us would love to hear your thoughts, your feelings, your reactions as you're listening. So definitely take a quick screenshot and tag me on Instagram.

I'm at Liz Moody, and she is at Fitty-Briti. We would love to continue the conversation. And if you love this episode, I would so appreciate a really quick rating review on your podcast platform of choice. It really helps other people find the podcast, and it's massively appreciated by me. And if this is the first episode that you're listening to, welcome. I am so excited that you're here. do not forget to subscribe before you leave so you don't miss out on future episodes which drop every single Wednesday.

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