The Liz Moody Podcast - Inspiralized’s Ali Maffucci — Her Mom’s Kidnapping (!!), Bell’s Palsy, And Where She Gets Her Happiness & Confidence

Episode Date: October 16, 2018

Ali Maffucci (@inspiralized) is the woman behind the Inspiralized juggernaut, which includes three best-selling cookbooks (Inspiralized, Inspiralize Everything, and Inspiralized & Beyond), an amazing, recipe-filled blog, and the world’s best spiralizer, the Inspiralizer (no really—I’ve tried so many and this is the one I personally use). Ali is an incredibly successful businesswoman, mom, and partner—and she makes it all look effortless and even fun. I spend a lot of this podcast trying to figure out how she’s so calm, confident, and collected—which leads us to one of the craziest stories I’ve ever heard in real life or on the podcast. A few years back, Ali’s mother was kidnapped from her home in New Jersey. She tells the whole story on this episode, but the way that it changed her outlook on life is fascinating, and hopefully, hearing it will change the way you look at the world too. We also talk about the Bell’s Palsy that paralyzed half of her face, self-confidence, weight-loss (Ali lost 30 pounds early in her wellness journey), building a business, her relationship with her husband Lu, becoming a mom, and so much more. If you love Ali (who doesn’t?), want inspiration for starting your own company, are a new mom, or are simply interested in living your healthiest, happiest life, this episode is a must-listen. For every episode of the Healthier Together podcast, there will be a corresponding giveaway—this week, it’s Ali’s favorite yoga pants and a copy of her newest cookbook. Check out @lizmoody to enter! Enjoy! This episode is brought to you by CW Hemp. I’m extremely picky about the supplements that I choose to use and CW Hemp’s full-spectrum hemp extract is one of just a handful that I take daily. By interacting with our cannabinoid receptors (which are all over our body—it’s crazy, and definitely worth a Google!), I find it super helpful in relieving stress and helping me sleep better and longer at night. I typically go for the middle strength mint chocolate, but the unflavored is also great for recipes, like this Lavender Hot Chocolate (which would also be great iced in the summer time!). If you’d lke to try CW Hemp for yourself, you can get 10% off your order using the code “healthiertogether.” Visit cwhemp.com/healthiertogether for more details, and if you have any questions (I LOVE talking about this stuff), don’t hesitate to reach out to me on Instagram! Healthier Together cover art by Zack. Healthier Together music by Alex Ruimy. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Hello, friends, and welcome back to the Healthier Together podcast. I'm Liz Moody, and I am the host of the Healthier Together podcast. I'm a healthy cookbook author. My newest cookbook is also called Healthier Together, and that is coming out in April, and I actually just turned in the manuscript for it, the final, final, final one. If you don't know, making a cookbook is an incredibly long process. It takes two years on average, and you go through a lot of different revisions and drafts and all of that, which is why the recipes in a cookbook tend to be better than the ones

that you might just find online because they've been really tested and really looked at and all of that. So my final, final, final round was turned in just this past Tuesday, which was so, so exciting. I'm medium. I'm excited, but I'm also freaking out a little bit because I can't change anything anymore. And I'm a perfectionist. I'm always like, oh, can I change this thing or this thing or this thing. And I can't anymore. It's all out of my hands. So I'm trying to meditate and be calm and do all of that stuff. So that's one of the reasons the podcast has not been up in the last couple of weeks. But I'm hoping to get back on a regular posting schedule and I have some amazing, amazing guests lined up for you guys. The first of which is who I

am talking to today. It's Ali Mafucci. She is the founder of Inspiralized, which is got it so many things. She has, first of all, her super, super, super successful website, which is inspiralized.com. And she talks about her recipes, but also she has a ton of interesting stuff about her life. She talks about her beautiful baby Luca, who is truly the cutest baby that I've ever seen in my entire life. She talks about her trips and her travels. She also has a product. She has a spiralizer, which she basically created when she was writing her book or maybe before that, but she couldn't find a spiralizer on the market that had all of the problems solved with it. So she decided to invent one on her own.

And I can attest to the fact that I actually bought one. Allie didn't give it to me. But I bought one and I didn't want to buy one for a while because it was a little bit more expensive than the like really cheap spiralizer that you could buy on Amazon. And so I bought the cheap one first. And then I was like, ugh, I hate spiralizing that sucks. Like it's so hard and messy and whatever. And then finally I caved and I bought Alley's. And it made the whole thing so much easier, nicer.

And I was like, all right, you win. You got it right. So she has that. And then she's also written three cookbooks, two that focus mostly on spiralizing. And then her most recent one, which came out in May. And we talk about a little bit in this episode called And Spiralized and Beyond, which is kind of using vegetables to replace any number of different grades. in your life. So rather than just replacing pasta, like you might when you spiralize, although

Ali's recipes are super creative and like go way beyond that. She also replaces rice and pizza crust and, God, she's like a meatball sub in there. She has so much stuff. It's such as such a good book. It's also really like easy. Like it's the type of recipes that you would actually make on a day to day basis, which I love because it's the kind of cookbook that you just like reach for again and again and again. So that's called and spiralized and beyond, and that's out now. Personally, I've known Allie for a few years now. She and I have the same editor and the same publishing house. So I got to know her, I think it, a party of some sort. And she is just truly like the coolest human. We were at this party and everybody was so, so, so excited to meet her

because she's Ali Mafucci. She's written New York Times bestselling cookbooks. And she and I was this completely unknown person. Like nobody knew who I was. Nobody gave a crap who I was. And she was so gracious and so lovely. And all these people would come up and be like, oh, my God, Ali, I love you. And she'd be like, oh, have you met my friend Liz?

She has a really great popsicle cookbook coming out soon. And I was like, oh, my God. But she was just so, so gracious and lovely and kind. And she's that in addition to being an amazing mom and an amazing partner and an amazing entrepreneur, like badass business lady. And I kind of don't understand how she does it all and how she does it all with such a smile and, and a sense of peace and calm and knowing. Like, she has this energy of really knowing that what she's doing is the right thing for her, for her family, for her needs in the world. And I think that confidence in, like, she embodies the like you do you

and you feel good about it. And I think I spent a lot of this episode trying to dig into that and figure out how she got to be that way. And there's some crazy stuff behind it, honestly. So we talk about a ton of things in this episode. We talk about her Bell's palsy, which if you follow Ali on Instagram, if you don't, you should. But she's Ali Mafuchi and then she is also inspired and spiralized. and she experienced Bell's palsy recently, which basically means that half of her face was completely paralyzed. It was insane.

And so we go into that. We talk about vanity. We talk about fear. We talk about just all the things of this illness coming on out of nowhere and trusting your body versus what doctors are saying and getting into all of that. We talk about mental illness. Her brother is bipolar. And we talk about how that sort of affected her life and her family's life. we also talk about her sort of daily routines like how she views working out she lost 30 pounds at one point

and I think it's interesting how she views food and how she views working out and the function of both of those things in her life so we really get into a lot of that stuff and then and then you guys she tells me the most insane story that I think I have heard on this podcast or in real life she talks about a kidnapping that happened in her family to her mother. And it is something that has, it's accounted for a lot of the way that she views the world today. And it is bananas. It is a crazy, crazy, crazy story.

So I'm excited for you guys to hear it. And then please come and talk to me about it and digest it with me on Instagram. I'm at Liz Moody because I think I'm still reeling from it. And I'm just like, how did this, how is this not a movie, truly? But I'm also trying to kind of see what I can learn from what Ali learned about it because it's truly shaped the role of gratitude in her life, how she interacts with the people that she loves. And I think it's just such an admirable way to take this very scary life experience

and use it as a method of growth, which Ali is just incredible at. If you can't tell, I'm so, so in awe of this word. woman and I was so, so excited to sit down with her in her apartment and record this podcast. As always, I do a little giveaway for every episode. So this episode, I'm going to give away a pair of Ali's favorite thing that she's purchased that's made her life healthier and happier recently, which is a pair of athletic leggings. They're high-wasted. They're flattering on everybody. And they're really, really lovely. So I'm going to give away a pair of those. And then I'm also going to give away a copy of Allie's new cookbook, which is in spiralized and beyond.

So come and hang out with me on Instagram at Liz Moody and look for a photo of something. I don't know what I'm going to use yet. Maybe something's spiralized. Maybe it'll be Ali, something like that. But the giveaway will be on that photo. So check that out for sure. And enjoy this episode. I hope you guys love it.

Great, Allie. Thank you so much for joining me today. Thanks for having me. I know you're very busy with your baby and your business. and your book, which just, when did your book come out? May 1st. May 1st. Yeah.

How's that going? It's awesome. I'm hearing from a lot of people that this is their favorite, and I think it's because it's a different type of cooking. It's not just spiralized. I think it's the most beautiful book that you've ever released. And the recipes are so good. There was ones in there that are like, why didn't I think?

They're just genius. Even I'm looking at the cover. Is that the pizza, the brisketa zucchini? No, those, that is the. meatball subs. So those are actually, it's completely vegetarian. It's like, you know, zucchini boats and I took the flesh of the zucchini and made them into meatballs. So the whole thing is made a zucchini. That's like literally genius. I feel like you're the person that like when you're like sitting there with a vegetable and you don't know what to do with it. I should like text

you and be like, Allie, I have this strange vegetable. Like what should I do with it? Yeah, you know, I don't like wasting food anymore. I think spiralizing taught me to use like the entire vegetable. What do you do with the little Nubbin that happens when you spiralize? I get the question a lot. I have a blog post on it actually. But I do different things. I usually chop it up and now I just like roast it for my son. But I used to put it in like containers and save them for potatoes on the weekends. Some people give them. Like a nubbin for tata. Exactly. Or just like chop the little nubbin. Yeah. Sometimes I'll just leave it in the pasta or just. Because you can eat it. I think people are always like it's not spiralized beautifully. So I shouldn't consume it.

But yeah, you should. You can toss it right in the pizza. So I want to start, you have like so many interesting things about you that I'm going to have a hard time containing it in an hour, I feel like. But I want to start with the most recent journey of yours, which fascinated me, which is you had Bell's palsy, which is, is it completely gone now? I feel that it is. Yeah. Okay. I do. So can you explain what Bell's palsy is? Yeah, you know, funny enough, I didn't focus as much into the science behind it. I just, you know, I obviously, my doctor told me I had it. and I just worked on ways to help me get better from it.

So basically it's a pinch cranial nerve. It's a nerve in your brain, and they're not exactly sure what causes it. They think it's a virus-related thing, so a virus causes this to happen, like flares up, and it pinches the nerve, and then half of your face, it's just your face, half of your face goes completely numb. There's certain viruses that they say cause it. I got tested for all the viruses. I didn't have any of them, and they say Lyme disease is a really,

common contributor and I got tested. I did not have Lyme's disease. So they're literally like, we don't know why it just happens. Is it ever related? I thought it was related to pregnancy and childbirth sometimes. So there's some things that can make it, you have a higher chance of getting bills palsy. Just because your immune system's compromised. Exactly. And what I realized is mine, after going to more of a Western medicine perspective, that it was stress related. And a lot of pregnant women and postpartum women are very stressed, your body's stressed, you know, you've lost so much blood just literally and figuratively. So they say that that can really give you a higher percentage of getting it.

So what was it, like when did you notice and what was it like that? Did you just like wake up and half your face was frozen? Kind of. So I was, I remember I had a meeting that day and it was in the morning. I got on the spin bike in my apartment and I was spinning and halfway through my spin class. I was, you know, breathing really heavily, and I tried to just lick my lips, and I couldn't actually lick half of my lip. And it felt really odd, but I was like, maybe I'm just working out really hard. You know, it's a side effect. I don't know. So I got off, shower, got ready for my meeting, and I went to put a lipstick on. And I could not put the lipstick on half my face. And I was like, maybe, you know, you immediately think it's allergic reaction. It's something topic, you know, it's nothing serious. You just think it's a freak incident. And I got to my meeting and it just got progressively worse and worse and worse. And of course my mom thought the worst. My husband was like thought the worst. Or say, do you think you're, I would, I would think I was having a stroke.

So this is why I love my Instagram community. I posted something on Instagram immediately because I tell them everything. And I'm like, oh my gosh, my face is half numb. This is so weird. I must have eaten something funny. And I got so many messages saying it's Bell's Palsy. This is my friend who had it. This is my dad who had it. This is like whoever had it. I had it. This is how you can get better from it. And I'm like, I don't think I have Bell's Palsy. That seems really serious. And there's other palsies that are very serious. So it freaked me out a little bit, but I started researching it. I got home from the meeting and I went to the doctor.

And he told me I had Bill's palsy. So I basically went through all my DMs and I'm like, I'm going to figure out what the best way to. So what is the best way to treat it? So the doctor, of course, immediately says you go on a steroid. It's a very prognosone is the steroid. And it's a very intense steroid. And that's supposed to help with inflammation. it's supposed to help bring your face back.

But I'm a nursing woman, and their studies aren't concrete enough for me to be confident to take a steroid. And I obviously love nursing my son, and I didn't want to have anything be wrong with him. My mother had taken pregnancy before and had a really bad reaction. She had been prescribed it for a back issue. I just heard a lot of nasty things about the steroid. It doesn't always solve the issue. So luckily, my Instagram community was like acupuncture.

It's like the number one. It's actually like one of the number one ways to cure. I'm putting cure in air quotes, Bell's palsy. And if you did nothing with Bell's palsy, would it just go away on its own? Is it just about accelerating that process? Half and half. So it does accelerate the process of healing. You're not going to heal overnight, but it accelerates it.

But people who don't immediately treat it have long-lasting effects, like a little droopiness on their mouth or eye or something like that. So it could leave permanent effects. It affects everyone differently. Some people last for two to three weeks. like it did for me, luckily. Some people six months and some people forever. Were you freaked out during that time that you could be like one of the forever people? Or were you like, no, I'm just like, it's going to be fine. I was like, it's going to be fine.

I mean, for me, I can't tell myself that, oh my gosh, what if I have it forever? Because I'll get really down. And there was a moment where I started to think that. I'm like, Ali, it's going to be fine. Like, you're very strong. You're very healthy. I went to acupuncture the next day. And I went to acupuncture almost every single day for two and a half weeks, and it went away by the third week.

So what were those two and a half weeks like outside of the fear moments? Did you have moments of vanity where you sort of reckon with the fact that your face looks? Like it's, it's, your face looks so different. It's like going to the dentist times like 20, you know. You know, it's so uncomfortable. That was the worst part about Bell's palsy. You're just so uncomfortable. Half of your face is numb. and that was the hardest part for me being the vanity never got to me from some reason because I knew it would get better so I knew it wasn't forever maybe if it was something like this is what I'm going to look like for the rest of my life I would have the vanity would have hit me but I you know it was very uncomfortable and that's kind of what I focus on and getting better the hardest part was with my son because I couldn't smile I couldn't really laugh I couldn't even

actually say the word like baby I had like a lisp so that was the part that like got me down the And I didn't want him to think I was mad at him because when you have Bell's Pals, you're literally like, you cannot smile. But, and I had some of, I had a really, really tragic sudden death in my family that week. So my attention was kind of on that. And I have very awkward photos from his funeral service. And then like the next day was my birthday. So my 31st birthday pictures were hilarious.

Everyone was making fun of me. So it ended up being like a lot of things happened at once. And I was distracted. And I was so focused on getting better at my son that I didn't think. about what I looked like. So you say that that was like caused by stress. You think that's like, are you doing things to mitigate stress now that you weren't before? Yeah. I mean, very random little things, but also big higher level things. Like just being more setting myself up for success in the mornings. I think my mornings get really hectic. And then that causes stress throughout the day. And I'm always

like a day like today, unfortunately, I was running around and I do feel stress. So I try to set myself up the night before, like make sure everything is clean and set up for the day so I can just start fresh. But I've, you know, I didn't work out while I had Bell's palsy. I'm rarely working out now. I do daily walks, which really help, like, for clarity's sake. But, you know, people who know me and follow me, I was like a high intensity workout, like high intensity training work I feel like my bike, like six days a week. I was doing Orange Theory Fitness five days a week during the winter. So I've always been a very like sweaty workout all the time, like go, go, go, go, go-go-go. So this is like zero to, well, this is 100 to zero what I'm doing right now. Do you feel,

because a lot of people do workouts that are really sweaty as a way of relieving stress. And, but it also does like a number of doctors I've talked to like it spikes your cortisol, like this whole high-intensity workout crazy is not good for our hormones or our bodies overall. So do you feel more or less stressed when you're not having those included in your day? Less stress because what I realized through this whole process with Bell's palsy is that I was putting too much pressure on myself to make these workouts and to work out all the time. And every workout I would compete with myself. Like, oh, I didn't work out as hard yesterday. Like, or, you know, this workout needs to be better or the same as yesterday. And I put this pressure on myself that I didn't

need to when all you really need to do is get your heart rate up a little bit every day. Like a walk is fine and eat well. Do you work out for health? Or I know you have like a pretty compelling weight loss story as part of your spiralized journey where you lost how much, how much, how much 30 pounds. 30 pounds, which is really exciting. So are you still thinking about your body in the frame of like, got to maintain this weight loss? Or is it just like a sheer health perspective now? So I was working out to feet.

Once I started living a healthy lifestyle and that's how I end up losing 30 pounds. I thought about my body differently. I thought about strength more than anything. I wanted to be fit. I didn't want to be thin. I just wanted to feel good and strong and like tight in a way where I just had I wanted muscles. I wanted muscle tone. but after having a baby, you totally shift.

You're just like, my body is stronger. My body is flabberer than it's ever been, but it's stronger than it's ever been. Because it produces like a human meat. Yes, a precious little baby. Yeah. So for me, I just, I don't feel pressure at all to work out, which is good and bad because then for me, when I don't work out as much, I don't make as healthy food choices, unfortunately. So I'm right now, I'm just trying to find the balance.

For me, okay, how many workouts is it a week? Or is it just walking? like that will get me feeling my healthiest. So I'm kind of adjusting to that now. And Bell's palsy really kind of changed my whole perspective. So I'm just trying to learn how to find my balance a little bit. Did being pregnant and after you had the baby, did that bring back any of the sort of old fears about gaining weight or anything like that?

Or were you immediately just sort of comfortable in your body? I think every woman is different. But for me, and I hate how it sounds so perfect. and la la la, la. But it's true. I just felt so empowered when I was pregnant. I just felt like this is, I know how hard it is. I have friends who've had miscarriages, friends who have infertility issues, and I've been there with them. And I thought my pregnancy was a miracle. And I think all pregnancies are miracles. It's, you know, incredible. And so I just felt so blessed the whole time and grateful that after I had the baby, I was like, well, how dare I shame my body and think this way

and look what it just did. And like women want this. They would kill to be, you know, 30 pounds overweight if they could have a baby. Right. You know? So I just... And you were able to actually feel like that, like in every moment? Yeah. I never, I've never struggled with an eating disorder.

I've always, the only, like, way I ever thought about my body was I just feel gross. Like, I don't feel good. I never, luckily had, like, body image issues. I just always, I just could never find the balance of feeling good. So I would just feel, like, shame a lot about, like, I don't feel my best. But I never looked at my body and been, like, I look gross, you know? Yeah. Yeah. There's a fine line balance and I think most people are more like, I hate my body.

And I was more like, I love my body so much, but I just don't feel good. Yeah, that's interesting. I remember I like was at the gym with my dad when I was maybe 15 or something. And we had this conversation where I was like, 100% of the people are here because they're working out to lose weight. And he was like, no, 100% of the people are here because they're working out to feel better so they can like go on hikes and do the things they want to do. And it was so cognitively dissonant to me the idea that 100% are. percent of the people wouldn't be there. Like, I was like, why else would you work out?

And then my dad was like, why else would you work out? And it was such a strange moment to realize that other perspective existed. That's like a very powerful point for him to make. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, for sure. And he's, yeah, he's just there so he can be like 80 and go hiking and stuff like that, which he's doing a good job of. And I'm very proud of him.

I have him trying to do 10 dozen steps right now. So that's the new. Did you get him on watch that tracks it or something? The iPhone does it. Oh, I don't know. Oh, yeah. I love it. I like check my stuff at the end of every day.

So he was like, he'd call me. the other day and he was like, I walked everywhere I could think to walk and I'm only at 7,000. And I was just like, get back out there and go for another walk, dad. You can do it. That's awesome. I think, I think honestly, also something I learned through Bell's policy is that, and I knew this. I just, you forget about it when you're in it, that diet is more important anyway. You know, I think working out what's always for me to like, like feeling strong, feeling tone, those kind of things, just feeling like I could lift a weight. I just like that feeling but and obviously byproducts are slimming out but eating well is is so important so I I

I'm trying to focus on that balance right now like you learn that because your body didn't really change that much when you stopped working out a ton yes exactly and if but what happened was I was you know after the Bell's policy I stopped working out and my diet started changing and that's when I started just eating more unhealthy foods because I wasn't working out I had this huge change it just happened to me, Bell's palsy, it caused stress, obviously. And I just started eating more sugars and things like that. And I gained a little bit of weight. And so now I'm just kind of like, it's just all diet alley. It really is. Exercise is to feel good and to be powerful and feel proud of your body and what it can do. And the diet is really what will make you feel great and make you

look great as well. Right. What are your like, when you're eating sugar, what are your foods that you're eating? I mean, I eat carbs all the time, but I love carbs. I'll literally just eat like a half a loaf of bread with almond butter and banana. That even sounds like my, I'll take a half a loaf of bread and I'll just like smush butter in it and make like a butter sandwich and eat it. So I'm like, I'm buttered banana. Like it makes you sound healthy. But it's all like obviously very highly caloric.

I do that. I love chocolate bars. My husband the other day. I just wrote an Instagram post about this this morning. My husband the other day goes, you know, for the past like two to three months you've been eating one chocolate bar a night. And I wasn't even conscious about it because I was like, I've been struggling to find my healthy, you know, foot traction again. And I'm like, you're right. I've been eating literally. I checked my fresh direct order where I buy a lot of groceries.

I'm like, I've been buying a Who Kitchen, almond butter, puffed quino bar. And it tricks you because it's like, oh, well, it's like the, like, Hugh Kitchen is, you know, like, refined sugar-free. Like, you're just like, oh, it's like a healthy chocolate bar, but it's, like, still chocolate bar. It's still chocolate bar. It's still sugar. It's still sugar. and the things it does to you. Right. Do you, what do you think of as, like, a healthy diet? Like, you know, there's the keto people and the paleo people and the vegan people.

Like how, and even from my new cookbook, which is called Healthier Together, like the podcast. But I had to write in the introduction, like, this is how I define the word healthy, which was a really weird moment for me to think about what that means. Well, let me ask you first. How did you define it? Well, that's cheating. I want to hear your answer first. I mean, it's so personal, like you just said. Everyone has a different definition of what healthy means.

To me, healthy is balance. And I would say it's just eating foods most of the time that nourish you and fuel you and make you feel good. And then balancing that with some type of exercise. I put that in air quotes, some sort of way to get your heart pumping and your blood flowing. And however, that makes you feel the best. And I think that it doesn't have to. be a certain diet. It could be like it's the you diet, right? It's what you eat. I eat every single type of food. There's no food I don't eat. So I wouldn't be able to put a label on my diet, but it's just like my me diet. For me, it's usually eating primarily vegetarian, eating like lots of lentils and quinoa and beans and things like that and brown rice and whole grains and seafood, like vegetarian during the day, maybe seafood at night, something light

like that. And like a lot of vegetables. A lot. I eat like a Yeah, a lot, really high fiber diet I'm trying to focus on right now because I've realized that's what's been helping me lately. Just a really fibrous diet. I drink so much water, as you see here, I have a water cooler and we go through that huge five-gallon jug twice a week, just my husband and I, I drink a lot of water. And I think that really helps with your skin and you're just digestive system and everything. Do you do any of the sort of like more fatty stuff?

Like what you do like adaptogens or like, you know, the new health creation. is all the time. You know, I just spoke in a panel about this because the question was what, how do you help simplify eating well and wellness? Because obviously there's a lot out there. There's adaptogens. There's just a lot of different ways to eat, things like that. And I just try not to buy a lot of products. And I try to just think about wellness and health and my diet really simply. Like the healthiest people out there don't really eat those crazy foods. You know, It's such a consumerist world we live in right now, and you don't need all this stuff to be well. What you need is what works for you, and it's just real food.

And I think that if you can just get down to basics, you know, my grandparents didn't have adaptogens and they lived really long. My grandma lived, she was like 93. And she ate a lot of ice cream, you know? So it's like, it's balanced and it's just going back to your roots, not a paleo sense of mine, just going back to your roots and like, we just need real simple whole food. And that's it, you know, and like an exercise and don't be too stagnant, you know, and like open your eyes, look at the world, breathe fresh air, like all these basic things.

And what I also learned through Bell's Palsy to go back to the original theme is that happiness is all part of this balance and it's so important because you could be the healthiest person in the world. But if you're not happy and centered and you can't like love yourself and people around you, the whole thing is off balance and it just affects you physiologically. You're listening to the Healthier Together podcast. I want to take a quick break. so I can tell you a little bit about one of my favorite supplements right now, Charlotte's Web.

If you're not living under a rock, you've likely heard of CBD. It's the wellness supplement du jour. It's the non-psicoactive component of the hemp or marijuana plant, meaning it won't get you high at all, and it interacts with a huge number of parts of your body to help bring them back into balance. Charlotte's Webb takes this one step further. Rather than isolated CBD, it's a full-spectrum hemp extract, which I love because I prefer plants in the whole food form generally.

I just assumed that nature knows far more than us at this point about everything working synergistically. The company is also vertically integrated, which means they produce everything in the bottle from seed to shelf. With hemp extract or CBD, this is a huge deal, since it can often be contaminated. And if you're taking a contaminated supplement, it kind of beats the point, doesn't it? Charlotte's Webb is also legal in all 50 states. So this is how I use it. I usually take two full dropperfuls of the mint chocolate plus, which is the middle strength one, out of the three strings.

And I put that under my tongue at night. I let it sit there for about 20 seconds since it absorbs better by sitting under your tongue rather than going through the stomach or digestive system. And then I swallow. I really find that it helps promote a healthy sleep cycle for me. I also keep a bottle at work and I'll take one dropper full just to deal with stress throughout the day. Again, it does not make you feel high at all.

I personally find that I just feel way calmer, especially when I'm taking it regularly. I also love to make healthy recipes with it. I have a lavender chocolate truffle recipe coming out in my new healthier together cookbook. And I also have a lavender hot chocolate recipe on my Instagram feed. So clearly I like lavender and chocolate together. I use the unflavored version for recipes, although the mint chocolate one would be super delicious and some chocolate energy balls, which I would love to just like have a stash of in my fridge whenever I'm feeling that burst of stress around three in the afternoon.

I feel like you know what I'm talking about there. It'd also be really good in ice cream, I think. So I'll have to try that. If you want to try the CW. Hemp extracts, they have been kind enough to offer 10% off for all healthier together listeners. Just go to cw hemp.com backslash healthier together. CWHEMP.com backslash healthier together, like the name of the podcast, and use the code healthier together when you check out to get 10% off. Again, that's the code healthier together. CWHemp.com backslash healthier together.

And then hit me up on Instagram. I'm at Liz Moody with any questions. I've studied this stuff a ton and I love talking about it. I truly believe in it and has made a massive difference in my life. All right. Let's get back to the interview. Okay, so we just took a little break because Luca woke up and Ali was breastfeeding him, which is lovely.

So he's had a snack. He's off on a walk now. lucky, lucky boy, it's like living the life, right? You just get fed and then everybody wants to entertain you and all of that. Everyone loves you. I know. Everybody thinks you're like adorable. You can't do any wrong when you're, I know.

Even when you like vomit on your mom, she's like, oh, it's okay. I know. It's totally fine. You're like, thank you for that vomit. Yeah. Do you like not get grossed out by anything anymore? No. Because you're, but just with him, right?

Like if Lou threw out, you'd be like, this is gross, right? Or does it be in a mom just like make you not. care about anything. Yeah, you don't care about anything. A lot of things change. One of the things I always say is like, along with the baby, like my memory came out my vagina. You just lose things. You gain a lot. You're much more fulfilled. I think you're sharper in ways, but you're, you're, you become, like, desensitized to things, you know. Interesting. Like gross things. Especially like, yeah. I mean, when I went to the hospital, I was kind of, I've always been like a private person in like the nudity sense. Yeah. I don't get, like I can't go into a bathroom.

and get naked with my friends. I've just never been one of those people. Right. Not because what we were talking about before, like body issues. I just, it's weird to me. Nudity is very private to me. And so, you know, when you're giving birth, you're literally, like, my husband was holding a leg. This nurse was holding a leg.

Did you think going into it, though, that you'd be like, you're going to stay up at my head? Or were you always like, it's fine, whatever. Well, I think after all your, you know, your OB-GY and appointments and, like, men and women being down there and, like, them checking everything out, I got very desensitized. I'm like, whatever. At that point also, you want that baby to be there so much that you're just, you don't care. You're in like a focused mode where like it's baby time. Right.

That's interesting. You wrote your birth story on the, on the blog, which I read. Oh, thanks. Do you, how do you, do you still remember all of it? That's always something that I'm really interested in because they say you forget, like, the pain of it. You know, I remember the pain because there was a very specific moment where we went to the hospital. I wanted to labor very long at home because I didn't want to go to the hospital and get drugs and then I end up having a C-section, which happens a lot.

So I labored a home. It was time to go. I went to the hospital and I always knew I was going to get the epidural. My idea, my fantasy idea was like I'll labor as long as I can until I need it and maybe I won't need it. But I knew I would have it. I have a very low pain tolerance. So I got there and to wait for the epidural, you have to have a bag of fluids, go through your entire system. Why?

You need to be hydrated or else you're like puke or get really sick from the epidural. And so I remember very specifically, I'll never forget, sitting there, staring at that bag, waiting for the fluid. It took a long time, like 45 minutes of laboring extra until those fluids left the bag. And did you ask for it right when you were like the pain? Right when I got there. No, when I got there, I was like, I'm ready for this. So I had to watch. And at one point I remember just turning around and like saying to Lou, my husband, I'm like, I can't even looking look at this.

bag anymore. Just like, tell me when it's there. Tell me when we only have a few more minutes. It was like, was it the worst pain you've ever felt in your life? Yeah. Like by far. But I've never had like broken bones or like, right. Bones popping out of my flesh. I don't know. I was the worst pain you had before birth. Um, I've never, I've never had a, I've never had a, the worst thing I could ever think about is like just a sickness. Like I had the swine flu. You had swine flu? Yeah. Oh, yeah, that's funny. But I've never. You get the weird stuff. I know. I know. I just. Yeah. But I, that was, that was, so I'll never forget that pain. And then there's things that happen to you, they don't tell you a lot about after birth. That's like just really gross. And that

also desensitizes you. Like the amount of fluids that come into your body. It's just. And like, keep coming out for a while, right? Like, months. Which is crazy. Yeah. Do you feel like back? At what point did you feel like, this is my normal body? Like, I'm back in myself. Um, I think when you, so I have, so I have. had like a little bit of tearing, like a normal amount. And so the first like six to eight weeks, you're still like bleeding and releasing fluids and your stitches are still stitching up. So for like they get hurt every time you pee kind of. Not peeing. You can't wipe. You have to like blot. And because you can't like rub the stitch. And I just felt like everything was a pain to do. Like

getting dressed, walking hurt after like 10 minutes because you have like raw stitches down. Yeah. So. Like in the worst place to have stitches. Yes. It's probably why they give circumcuitary to boys and their babies because men could never deal with that later on. So just like never. I always say like if men had to get IUDs, like they would be like an anesthesia type situation. Like I just feel like women are, I think it's a greater conversation, but I think women are expected to endure such levels of pain that men never are expected to endure.

Yeah. And they wouldn't. Like I feel like the entire medical system would be different if men got their periods every month and like cramps and like IUDs and birth control. Like they wouldn't abide by it. the side effects that women like casually deal with. No, they wouldn't. Yeah, I think it's insane.

So were you nervous about birth leading up to it or were you just like, me? Do you get anxious or like, what do you get anxious? I know, I can tell you're trying to pull it out of me and I, I, I, because it's the thing that fascinates me most about you is you just seem so, it's so opposite to how I live my life, but you just seem so like roll with the punches, like everything's fine. I'm so like, like, if I just feel like an asteroid, if an asteroid was coming to the earth, I would like come over to your house because I feel like you'd be like, here's what we're going to do. Like here, it's fine.

Well, I'll give you an example of my kind of personality. So when I went into labor, when I started going to labor, so this isn't going to labor. My water broke. When my water broke, it was a Sunday. And my parents and my sister and her husband and Lou and I were all going to go out to brunch at around 1 o'clock, more like a lunch. And my grandma was there. And so my water breaks at noon. and my husband's like, you know, he's like building a playlist for the hospital, like plugging in our

phones, trying to make sure everything's ready. And he, you know, I put on my diaper and I'm like, cool, like this is happening. And he's like, okay, like, we should call your family, tell him to like, meet us at the hospital. I'm like, Lou, I'm not going to, I don't need to go to the hospital right now. You have 24 hours after your water breaks to get to the hospital. And I'm like, let's just go have lunch. I mean, I'm hungry. I want to have my meal because you can't eat once you get to the hospital. So we literally went to lunch at one o'clock. And I started laboring 15 minutes after my water broke, I think, if I remember quickly. So halfway through the lunch, I'm like, okay, I think I should get back to my apartment now. Like, this really hurts. So you're literally

sitting there at lunch having contractions? Yeah, like breathing through contractions. So I'm not, I don't, you know, I don't get anxiety. I definitely get stressed because obviously I really, truly believe Bell's palsy was because of stress. I just think it manifests in different ways in me stress. Like I never feel, oh my God, I'm so stressed. I never feel that way. I just feel like excited. Like, okay, I have a lot to do. I'm going to get it done. But then my body internally is very stressed, you know, and I don't. Do you have physical, like, other than the Bell's palsy, do you ever get like stomach aches or any, you know, like other physical manifestations of stress? No, but I'm a big stress eater. So I guess yes in a sense. So you'll like be standing in front of the freezer with

ice cream and then he'd be like, maybe I'm stressed. Yes. Well, and my husband will be like, you just ate a half a loaf of bread. I'm like, I know. I have a lot of work to do. And I'm like, oh, stress eating. That's interesting. Yeah. Were you like that when you're a kid? Like, kind of just like easygoing. You know, my, I think I've always put a lot of pressure on myself to like excel. I don't know if we've ever talked about this or you've ever read it and anything I've written about but my older brother he's three years older than me he's bipolar he's much more than just bipolar obviously but he is bipolar and he was the quote-unquote you know black sheep and troubled child and um was he diagnosed when you were quite young like did you always know is that or was it just

like what's wrong with him why is he acting this way um he was so when he was um three um three yeah when he was three i was just born we're three years apart um when he was three he got diagnosed with meningitis and they think that the meningitis something happened chemically in his brain and he developed bipolar disorder. I guess that can happen. I'm not as well versus my mother is in it, obviously. Yeah. So she thinks that's what happened because we don't have a history of depression in her family. So, but he had ADD, ADHD, SAD, like, sees an effective disorder. He's had a lot of different like anxiety issues. So he's had a lot of different mental hardships. So I think like growing up with that and seeing the stress it caused my my parents. I just wanted to always

excel and remain calm because I felt like, okay, I'm like the rock. And my mom always said, like, if it wasn't for you, I'd be like crazy. So that put a lot of pressure on me. Yeah, that's like its own and timing. Yeah. But I never like, I don't resent her at all for it. It made me who I am. And I do love the person that I am. Have you ever had moments where you're like, I cannot be the rock anymore? Um, have I ever had moments like that? I don't think so because I, I liked being there for my mom and being, like, doing well in school. Like, it just felt great. Like, I could see she was so happy, and it made me feel great.

So it was like a win-win, I guess. Do you have other siblings? I have a little sister. Yep. And then little, she's three years younger than me. She's not that low. Is she, you know, a rock or is she just like the littlest kid where she can do whatever the fact she wants?

She's a baby, yeah. She does whatever she wants. She still acts like she's 16 years old with my parents. Right. She actually lives in the building right next of mine that's connected to me. That's so cool. Yeah. We got her to move here from.

New York a while ago. She's like, you know, my best friend. She's awesome. She's like really, really social and fun and outgoing. I'm more of like, I have my four best friend. That's all I need. You know, I have my husband and my baby. That's it. How has your having the baby affected your relationship with Lou? I think probably the same way it affects most people. It brings you together, but it changes your relationship. Like I look at Lou in a different way now. I look at him as like this, like amazing father and it like warms my heart to the end of time to see him as a dad and see Luke's eyes light up when he walked into the room the way he cares for him. Like I love Lou's so much more on different levels. I didn't think it could. But then like it changes a relationship because

you become especially in the beginning now it's not as bad. But in the beginning you're literally just like cohabitating. You're like not sleeping. You're just trying to raise this baby. Right. You're not like all hands on deck. Yeah. Like you know. for a while, for a very long time, I was obviously still wearing maternity clothes because I was still getting back in his shape. And I remember him coming home one day. And he was like, I think you've been wearing that shirt since Sunday. And it was Friday. I'm like, you know, so you just don't care as much about your appearance. And when you're in a relationship, like, part of it is like feeling good about yourself, like, feeling sexy together. And you kind of like forget all that for a while because

it's all about this baby. It's hard to maintain your sense of like, I'm a wife and I want to feel sexy and hot and like it's hard to do that so like affects different parts of your so how do you like you and him both I hate the like work life balance like especially for moms because I think it's true for both of you but like you have so many different hats that you're wearing all the time do you schedule them like are you like I'm going to schedule date night this is my time with my kid this is my time where I'm working so I'm very lucky and fortunate to have a nanny now so I got a nanny when he was five months old and and that's when I like went back full time time with and spiralized.

So she works eight to five. And now, in the beginning it was really hard, but now she comes at eight and leaves at five. And even though I nurse him throughout the day and I make all his food and give him all his food, when 5 p.m. comes, it's like the best time because I don't even have my cell phone unless I like want to take a picture of him. I'm not doing any work. And that time until he goes to bed is like me and Luke of time. So that's like a scheduled block, I guess, like I love.

We build date nights around when my parents are in town usually. My little sister actually just became obsessed with babysitting Luca. I think she's just more confident with him now. So that's going to be great to have her for like date nights. Yeah, he seems less fragile. Yeah, I think. And I never held a baby before I held Luca. Yeah.

So I get it. So we kind of build that around like when my mom's going to be here, we'll go on a date night. And we go out with the baby all the time because we're doing baby lead weaning and he can just eat anything we eat at restaurants. It's easy to just take him everywhere. But a lot of our social life is with the baby, which is really fun. Like, you love seeing your child, like, open his eyes and see the world, you know? And I'm so happy we live in a place where he can see so much.

And it's just great to see him absorb something. Or, like, for me, that's more exciting than, like, a date night with my husband, sadly. Because we're but we're together. So it's kind of like a date. It's like a day date. You're always on a day date with your husband. Do you get anxious about, I mean, you're obviously like an incredibly hard worker and you've like written all these books and you have your product and all of that.

Do you get anxious about turning everything off at five? Like, oh, I should be like on Instagram engaging with people or anything like that. Well, what's easy about it now is that the baby is usually asleep by like 738. So if I need to do things at night, I know I always have that time and my husband understands he's an entrepreneur as well. Like he never shuts it off and I respect that. he's trying to build his business also. But I definitely feel the one thing I have like, and I don't know if the word is anxiety

about it, but the one thing that I struggle with is like, I don't think I'm doing as good as I could do or as well as I could do. And I don't think I'm as successful as I should be at this point. I was going to ask if you felt success. I mean, you've had best selling books, like New York Times best selling books. Yeah. And you have a really popular product that's sold in, you know, real stores around the country. And do you look at yourself and like think, or when you see people,

people, you've gotten recognized on the street and stuff like that. And does any of that make you feel successful? It all makes me feel successful along the way, like all these accolades and the recognition of course. And when I'm invited to like a speaking engagement for to talk about entrepreneurship, I always feel successful. But day to day, I don't feel very successful, which is, which is very odd. I feel like I should be doing more. There's things I want to do that I'm not doing. there's things I want to build that I'm not building. Like what? I mean, I think that there's other products that I've been working on that have been just taking me way too long.

And I think that when I was pregnant, I kind of plateaued because I wanted to enjoy being pregnant, like that you have your first pregnancy to yourself. You don't know if it's going to be your last pregnancy, you know? So I just took it as a time to like, I'm still going to do my job, but I just want to enjoy this pregnancy. And I don't want to stress myself out too much. I also want the baby to be born in like a non-stop. stressed out body. Right. So I kind of, so now I'm like getting, I've finally gotten back into the

groove and I'm just, I have so much I want to do, which is why I time block all the time because it's the only way I can get things done. What a time block just means like, do you like literally be like, this is my hour for brainstorming, and this is my hour for answering emails, etc.? Yeah, and I do it. I use my phone calendar, so like my Google calendar, so I get alerts. So if I'm, even if I'm in the middle of a sentence on an email, I will like put it in my drafts and start the next block. And you won't check your email when you're not in an email checking time? No, I won't. That's like, it takes a lot of self-control, I feel like, but that would be like a game changer. It is. It's, it's less the email too. It's more the DMs on Instagram because I'm very,

um, very open and communicative with my community and I'm always responding, like I respond to every single DM, even if it's just a heart. So like hundreds a day, I'm constantly doing it. So when I time block, I do like DMs like one hour will be DMs. And so it's like I just get so much more done because I'm not as focused on that because it takes time, you know. Right. So when you're thinking about whether you're successful, it's always about things that you want to be doing in the future that you're not doing now, it's never like that person's so successful because they've done this or they have this many followers. It's not comparative. You know, it's not comparative on social.

I don't really compare myself anymore on social media because it's just not healthy, but it's also. fake. Like Instagram people are buying things. They're like they have their their ways of building their communities that isn't authentic. And I think you need to diversify the way you're successful because if you're just an Instagram success, that could die tomorrow, you know? Right. I just, I feel like Inspiralized isn't big enough. And I don't really know exactly, you know, obviously I could be, I could make a restaurant if I would. I could have a TV show. I could have all these different things that are really big. And I don't even think if I had those things, I'd still feel successful. I just think I'm an overachiever. But what happens to me sometimes, unfortunately, is I have these like big

dreams. And if I don't get to them, I get really discouraged. And then I kind of like take a step back. So what do you do in those moments? You know, in those moments, I like to talk to people that are talk to people or listen to people that are successful. Because usually what they say, they have the same issue and then they'll just like, you know, prioritize things in their life. And usually what I, how I deal with that is like, like what you just said, you have New York Times best selling cookbooks, you have a successful product, you have this, you have a baby, you have a loving husband. I love my relationship with my husband.

We're very in love. My baby's amazing. He's healthy. I'm healthy. My family's healthy. And I kind of like say all these things to myself and it grounds me a bit. I love to listen to like a podcast episode where I know it'll, it'll, you know, make me inspired to be a better businesswoman.

Like, I love how I built this one. I just always become inspired. And I never become jealous. Like, oh, look what they built. It's more like, okay, I know I can get there. Like, this person just inspired me and I'll take like a little piece of advice and run with it. Do you feel like there's key things like that people could do if they wanted to start

their own business or become like a better business woman? I mean, my number one thing is if it's a different business. doesn't consume your every thought, don't pursue it. If it's not something you're wildly obsessed about and really passionate about and you know, like, without a doubt, it's going to be a success, don't pursue it because it's a very thankless thing, entrepreneurship, as you know, and it's, you're just always striving towards something and you get a lot of rejection. I get nose every day. So I think you have to know in your heart of heart that it's going to be successful. So you still get nose, even at your sort of level of success, yeah. Of course. And, um,

Yeah, I mean, because I think people tell themselves, like, oh, if I, like, if I, if I hit this level, then all the doors will open and I'll feel good and I'll, you know, you tell yourself these things. And then it's interesting when you see people who have had those levels and then they still, you know. So one of the, one of the first pieces of business advice I heard was that don't put all your eggs in one basket. And I forget what the, what it was in reference to. I think it was like a PR, PR podcast or article. or something I read, and it was like, don't think because you get an article in the New York Times that you're going to become the most successful business overnight. Don't put all your eggs in a basket.

Don't bank on something. Like, never bank on something. That article could get pulled. The article might be not as successful. And nothing is going to launch you. It's like what you do every day slowly and build and build and build that's going to get you there. So I think that's extremely important. Interesting.

Okay, switching gears. Yeah. You have one of the craziest stories of your past that I've ever. heard. And you allude to it sometimes. I don't know if you've told it on your blog or anything, but you allude to it as part of your like, why I'm such an insanely positive, well-adjusted person, which again, like if I sound fascinated by it, it's just because I literally am sometimes. I feel like I should get like a little bracelet that's like, what would Ellie do? Yeah. And you see it's like very, it's all together. But it's for me, it's like, it's the little like duck, you know? It's like smooth

on top of the water and then underneath it's like paddling frantically. Like I just feel like my thoughts are turning constantly. And then when people actually have thoughts that seem like still in common, like, let's get into this. I think that's a sign of brilliance. That's what I think so. Yeah, well, so that's what Ali would say. So for me, I'm like, that's a sign of insanity.

And Ali's like, I think that's a sign of brilliance, which just adds to my point. But can you talk a little bit about the story about what happened to your mom? Because I think it's really fascinating. Yeah. I mean, I guess it's the reason. Why? And I didn't really know this until maybe like a year ago I realized because people were saying to me through what I've been doing with in Spiralize, you're just so like happy all the time and positive. And, you know, and people are always in podcasts when they interview me or interview me anywhere, they're always like, you know, are you like anxious? Are you stressed? Like, tell me what it is? We're all like trying to like scrape back the surface. And they're like, what's under there? And I'm very real. I would tell you. So I've considered myself. very grateful. I know people talk a lot about gratitude. And one of my favorite, you know,

business people is Gary Vaynerchuk and his big thing is gratitude as well. And I've listened to a lot of his podcasts about and a lot of what he talks about. And it's just very true. But so I'm, I consider myself very positive and grateful because I am truly grateful to be alive and have my family and have all these blessings. And I think that, and I'll get to the story, obviously, but I think that we're just not a grateful society anymore. Maybe my general. Our generation isn't, but I feel like a lot of people, if they show more gratitude, they'd be just happier people. Do you do like a gratitude like practice where you do like the three things you're grateful for every day type of thing or something? Or is it just like something you've ingrained in your life on a more holistic level?

I've ingrained it because of this story. I'll tell you. Great question to get me back. I thought that. So when I was a freshman in college, so this is 2005, my, I got a, like a, I think it was called, it was AOL instant messenger, so like an AIM message. And it was from someone who lived in my town back home. And they said, hey, Allie, is everything okay with your mom?

This is like a nighttime. And I'm like, yeah, of course, why? And like, oh, we saw like helicopters and we saw police cars like on your street. and we were, like, we heard something about your mom, like she got kidnapped or something. So I was, you know. Did you think, like, this is bullshit when you were? Yeah, I just thought it was some silly kid who was like in my sister's grade. I don't know.

I thought it was something silly. And so I called my sister, who was in high school. And I called her and she started crying. So she handed the phone to someone else who was my uncle. And my uncle proceeded to tell me that my mother had been kidnapped earlier that day. He told me, you know, what had happened to her and never told me she was like, And I'm like, is she alive? I'm like bursting tears.

I'm like, is she alive? He's fine. She's here now. Like, she's still at the police department, but she's fine. So what had happened is that it was the morning. My father owns a landscaping company to give you a little background. He owns a landscaping company the night before. One of his workers who had laid off, slept, hit out in a shed on her property overnight.

And in the morning when my father went to work, he came into the home and my parents' home. And my mom was coming down the staircase with a bag of laundry. And she was a stay-home mother with a bag of laundry. And he came out from the corner with a gun and a knife, this man. And he duct taped her head to toe and dragged her out of the house, put her in her, hit her car, and drove her to this abandoned shed, like maybe three miles away from her house. And put her in this box, tried to put her in this box and said, you know, stay here. I'll kill you.

So she would end up happening was that she was laying on the ground. And she said that she's diabetic to give you also even more backstory. She's diabetic. And she was having low blood sugar. She was about to like literally pass out. And she said that she closed her eyes, saw a light and the light opened. And it was an image. Like she saw this.

She like hallucinated this. She saw a police officer coming to her to, I'm sorry, to me and my sister standing at our door saying, your mom died. She was kidnapped and she died. And she said she woke up from like this diabetic shock almost. And she found like a hard, I think it was a piece of wood. And she had duct tape on her wrist, obviously. And she basically with her hands and the sharp piece of wood jiggled her way out and got her hands free.

And then took as much tape as she cut off so that she could run. And she was like, I open this door of the shed. He could be out there waiting for me. but she's like, what am I going to do? Like, I can't, this story is not going to end this way that I die. Like, my girls need me, which was hard for my brother, obviously when she tells the story. So she ran out, and luckily he wasn't there. She ran out to the road, like screaming, hollering, and a car drove by, picked her up and drove

over to the police station. So in the meantime, my father had come home, saw the police trashed, and immediately went to the police station. And while he was at the police station, he gets a call from this man. And the man says, I want a million dollars for your wife or she dies. So this guy was stupid, of course, on many levels. And he had stolen my mother's phone. So they found him through the GPS on her phone because he was using it and arrested him.

And he is ending up now in 20 years in prison. But she, he was found, they basically, he pled insanity. They put him in an institution. And he was found 10 minutes outside our home with a gun. So they thought he was coming back again. So then they put him in prison. He's in prison for 20 years. And then he is actually deported back to his home country of Guatemala.

So what I say, what I didn't know this when it all happened, I was so young in college. And it was just obviously a huge shock and really hard to go through. But what I remember most is the last conversation my mother and I had on the phone. We were like fighting about something silly. And now I'm like 18 years old, whatever you are when you go to college. And we had some silly fight. just didn't end the conversation well. So I'm just, obviously now after everything happened, everyone who I touch in my life, even when I go to bed with my husband at night, like I'll never go to bed

angry. It's like, I kiss you. I love you. And even with my mother, it's always on the phone. Always, I love you. We're always like, we never fight on the phone. It's always like, if we do fight, we end on a good note. And I'm just happy to have my mother in my life. And my mother is my rock. She's my role model. She's an extremely strong woman because a lot of housewives, I don't know if they would have that strength, you know? It's she... A lot of like people in general. I don't know if they would have that strength.

Like, she, how did she process that? Did she have PTSD or anything from it? She didn't at all. She cried like once. And I think it was when she saw, I think it was she saw me. She, she's kind of, I get to get, I guess I get it from my mother. She's not an anxious person. She's not stressed.

She, she always says there's a solution to every problem. It's some advice for her father. gave her and I live my life like that. Why get stressed? Why care? Like there's going to be a solution to this? Like find the solution. Yeah. Like there's no use in sweating the small stuff. All those things are true. So she's very, she didn't cry or anything. My father was a mess. Did he have PTSD? Like did he feel a sense of responsibility? 100%. Yeah. I walked home from, so my mother didn't even let me come home. She was, it was finals or something. It was right before Thanksgiving, I think, or Christmas. And she's like, no, no, take your finals. I'm fine, Allie. I'm fine. Don't

worry about it. So she, I didn't even get to come home for like two weeks or something like that. And I saw her obviously and it was like her hair had been ripped out from the tape and I just cried. It was really, it was really bad. My father, I came home like from college and I remember he was like walking around the house with a gun. I'm like, dad, if someone comes to get you. Like are you going to shoot them? Exactly. What are you doing with this gun? Like, but he felt like awful and it really affected him and I still think it does a little bit to this day. Like just the way they protect themselves, their house and everything. But my mother, just a very strong woman, and it's made me be a stronger person because of her and that she got through that and that she, she didn't let it affect her life.

She didn't let it make her scared of living. And it just makes me. Yeah, didn't it make her, I feel like it could go either the direction of like you're like live every moment. It's, you know, appreciate all these things. Or it could go to the direction of like, you cannot trust people. Like, be afraid of everything. No, it didn't. And she still is like, she had her nickname in high school was smiley.

She still always smiles, laughing, like happy pop. positive. And I think I guess I must have gotten that from her because my father is the whole opposite spectrum. Um, but my, I just, why not be grateful? Why not be gracious? Like, we're healthy. We have roofs over our head. We have, you know, most of us are lucky to, if you have your family in your life, you should be really grateful for that because my mother could have died. She could have died from diabetic shock. She could have gotten shot by this man. And I could not have my mother in my life. And I don't know if I could have made it through something like that. So that's where I get my gratitude and my positivity.

And I just, I'm very thankful to be alive and to be where I am and I'll never take it for granted. That's like an insane story. It's like truly one of the most insane stories. I mean, I can't, I can't even imagine being your, it's just like something that I only happens in a movie. I know. It's just, it's crazy that that's real in any sort of real way. Yeah. And it's also like the stuff that would happen in a movie.

it's interesting because like she escaped that day too and like if you were writing the pot for movie like I would never think of a kidnapping is happening and then being over in the same day either it's like what was that show it was called 24 yeah that it's like yeah it's the episode it would be like a 24 hour movie basically that's so interesting did your siblings respond in the same way where they both sort of got a renewed sense of life is wonderful you know I think my sister got the anxiety. My sister was a very anxious person and she got it from my dad. She's anxious about flying. She's anxious about a lot of different things. And I think that she was in high school. So it was very scary for her. And I think that she, it drew her even closer to my mother.

But no, there was never like residual negative effects. Right. But for me, it turned into like a very positive, the silver lining of everything that happened is that it changed my perspective because I was always someone who was, I had considered myself a somewhat jealous person before that. And that was just in high school. I had jealousy. I had jealousy to my siblings. I just, I wasn't very grateful. So, do you think that gratitude is the antidote to jealousy? I think so, because I think if you love yourself and you're, you're happy with your life and you're, grateful for your life, why be jealous? Because you should, gratitude in itself is, you're, you are gracious, right? you're grateful. So it's something where what you have, you're happy with. So it doesn't,

I think of people who are jealous aren't happy with themselves and what they have, you know. Is there anything you can do to have that other than have your own be kidnapped? It's really, really hard. And because I'm someone who came from something tragic and it turned into this, I don't know exactly how I would have done it otherwise. I think that it is almost like listening to stories like this and realizing, I mean, just doing like an audit of your life. And I think if you turn on the news, there are a lot of people who have it worse than the average person who's probably listening to this podcast. And it's just, you know, there's just so much more to be thankful for. Trust me, there's a lot to be, you know, whatever I'm jealous about or not thankful for. There's a lot

of bad things that happen to us all day, you know, every day. There's things that aren't great that we wish we're better. But there's more in the plus side than the minus side. I also think we have as humans the tendency to compare up and we almost never compare down and when you're constantly comparing up you obviously have such a different perspective on your life than and comparing down almost feel shitty like oh I'm going to like look at that homeless person and feel grateful about my life but it is like if I'm going to spend so much time looking at this celebrity who like is at this resort and I'm like why can't I be there you know and that brings up a good point too I was just talking about this one of the things I did that also helped with just being

happy and positive is doing an audit of my Instagram because I think if you're following people who are making you feel that way like why are I getting invited to this beautiful resort to take pretty pictures of myself. I should be getting if you thinking that way, unfollow that person and just follow people like Liz and like Ali who live lives that are, you know. Very messy. Yeah, very messy. I have a few pictures on my Instagram, me with puk on myself or my son, so not glamorous. Yeah, you won't be envious of my life. There are certain things that are very enviable by your life. I just think that Instagram has kind of, it's an amazing platform, but it's ruined a lot of things for people, you know.

And I think that you need to do an audit of your life. Who you follow in social media because that's really powerful because you're consuming that every day. Who makes you feel the most positive that you follow? Like, are there people that you're just like, oh, yes, that's what my soul needed? Um, I always get this question and I like reach for my phone because when you can, consume something all the time. You don't even remember who it is. But honestly, like, I like following my, like, friends. Yeah, your actual real life friends. I feel like people don't follow their friends. Yeah. That's, which is so funny. But yeah, no, when my friends post content, which I feel like

it almost gets buried sometimes all the other accounts that I follow, but when they do, it is the content that makes me feel 100% the happiest. Yeah. Like, my friend Cassidy is hilarious. And she, like, I think it's only like once a week or maybe a couple days a week, but she has this like, it's the same angle and it's of her boyfriend. They just moved in together. And it's of her boyfriend making her dinner. And she's like, like, cooked for me bitch or something funny like that. And it puts a smile on my face.

But it's also like you know both of those people. You know their relationship. I think the problem of social media is it's like it's such a snapshot and you think you know the person but you don't. So when you actually do know the person, it's a completely different experience. Yes, exactly. And, you know, on a daily basis, if you're seeing people who are made up all the time, you might think less of your appearance. And my friends aren't in full makeup and hair every day. It's just, I think, following, like, my sister and my friends just helps me keep real.

And if you look at, like, my Instagram stories, like the top people are people that I know. That's cool. That's actually, it's like, it's an obvious tip, but a very smart one. Yeah. And there's other influencers, obviously, that I do follow. But that's probably my number one. Liz, maybe. You are at one of my talking.

Your recent snaps of your husband are really... He's a cutie, right? Yeah, of course. I know. He's such a cutie. Yeah, you're always at the top of mind, but I have to say, like, Luca's, like, a very large part of that. Like, he's my go-to baby that I show people.

I'm like, look at this baby. And they're like, okay, just think he's so cute. It's so polarized on Instagram because I've got a lot of messages from people being like, I don't care about your kid, don't show me this. And then you get people, you know, my post, my social. my personal posts on Instagram get the most likes, the most comments, but the highest, like, loss

of followers. Interesting. And are you able to just kind of be like, whatever? I don't care, yeah. It'll even sound the end. And to be honest, I rather have people like you who are, who like, love me. Yeah. And like, like what I'm doing. Yeah. Rather than, like, you're a hate follower of mine. I don't need you

following me, so. Yeah, completely. Okay, so I have a few questions that I ask everybody. Okay. Let's Start easy. What is something that you've purchased that has most helped to make you healthier or happier? Something that I've purchased, most happier or healthier. I'm so bad at rapid fire questions. I'm like looking around my desk because it would probably be at my desk.

I would say these athletic leggings that I'm wearing right now, they are high waisted and very flattering. And no matter how bloated I'm feeling or anything, I just always feel good in them. And if I wear them around the house, I feel great. And then I just, I mean, I just re-bought it. I buy it all the time, but Glacier's boy brow. I can wear that and that's it and go out and feel fabulous.

And you feel confident. Yeah, I used to, like, not think brows mattered. And now it's, I use the honest brow pencil, but it's my desert island product, 100%. Okay, yeah. Like, I used to be, like, mask. And now I don't do mascara because it kind of irritates my eyes. So, like, if I can do, I have, like, a tinted. sunscreen, a little bit of blush, and then my

honest stuff, and I, like, feel a brow makes you feel so put together. It's insane. Well, think about it. If you don't have eyebrows, you would look strange. It's very strange. But even if they're, like, kind of just askew and wonky, I don't know. I think it was the first time a makeup artist did my makeup, and she did my brows, and I'd never done them before, and I was like, like, it's the best way to look like a movie star, I feel like. It's like, wow, who am I? I love it. Yeah, it's amazing. Okay.

What's a big mistake? you made in your life and what's something you really got right? A big mistake. I like that I made. Big mistake. You know, I like to think I have no regrets in my life and I don't make big mistakes. But I would say my last relationship for Lou, I wish I had stayed in as long. I didn't gain anything from that relationship.

I mean, of course, I learned from it. But I dragged it out for too long and it wasn't a toxic relationship. I wasn't even in the relationship for the right reasons. Were you scared to leave? I just think like any time you're in a relationship, you still like the person and you're hanging on to like the little threads that you like about them, but the blanket is already totally. I also think the inertia.

Like I think there's so many things in our life that are just like the inertia of it keeps like we stay in this job, we stay in this relationship because it's so much harder to deviate from the flow of a river than it is just like keep floating along on it. Yes, exactly. So that was a big mistake. Because I, and I, the reason I say it's the big mistake is because not only because it wasn't good for me, but I lost a lot of friends because I was a relationship where I spent all my time with him. And it was in a very pivotal time in my, like, social life. Like, you're just out of college and you're still trying to, like, preserve your relationships from college.

And I just kind of felt the map. And my friends also did too, which maybe is a testament to they weren't that great of friends. Do any of your friends treat you different now that you're like kind of a public figure? No. Honestly, the friends I hang out with the most are my three best friends from grade school. And we're still best friends. And they have like years of Ali not as a public figure to like fall back on before Ali became a public figure too. Yeah.

Oh, of course. Definitely. And they came to me, my worst quality about myself is that I'm flaky, which you've also probably realized by now. And two years ago, they gave me an intervention. This may a year and a half ago. They gave me an intervention. Oh, did they do a good one with like a sign on the wall? ball and like balloons and snatch?

No, they just literally sat me down. They were like, you are a shitty friend and you're really flaky. You're a shitty friend because you're flaky. And it was high opening because I had no idea. And it was mainly because of this relationship as well. That's really interesting. Yeah. Yeah, I was listening to a podcast recently that was like,

it was about how much effort we put into all of these other parts in our lives, but we just expect our friends to like chug along and be there. And if we put even a small fraction of the effort, into our friendships that we did into even our like relationship or our business or any of that stuff like our friendships would be so good but we just like expect them to always be fine and in the background and giving us all these things when we don't put the same thing back into them which I think is interesting. It's very interesting and every time a friend of mine does something sweet and thoughtful I'm like I know I'm like oh my gosh and I feel so much and I'm so happy

and it makes me almost feel shitty because I'm like I should be doing this for my friends like Even sending me flowers, like a friend of mine sent me flowers just to be like, thanks for your advice the other day. I mean, I have one friend who always does birthday cards. And it's just like, it's such an easy thing, but it 100% makes me feel amazing. I literally have my desk right here, has envelopes, stamps at all times, even return address labels. And I don't think to just like handwrite a note. So, but one thing that I did write. A lot of things, but.

Gosh, so many things. No. I would say choosing the way that I'm feeding my son is the right decision. It feels very right to me. And I love what I'm doing, baby lead weaning. So there's like traditional weaning and baby led weaning for people who are listening and don't know. Traditional weaning is pure-aid food that you spoon feed a baby. And usually you start with like, you know, period, sweet potato peas, whatever, and you feed them.

And then eventually you... That's like what we think of with baby food. Yeah, exactly. You can buy it in a pouch, that kind of thing. And then eventually you feed them solid foods. So what baby lead we, what baby lead waning is, is the idea that you skip the periods completely. And you just, their first, from the first time they have food, it's like real whole food. So his first foods were like, he had obviously avocado.

I think that was his first food. Avocado, banana, like a piece of toast. Is there a reason not to do that? Is it like a choking issue? So, I mean, I could film a one-hour podcast episode about this, and I don't know if people care enough, but briefly. So, it's briefly, and you can feel free to edit this later. Basically, the idea is that we think that babies need to have period food because we, it goes back to, again, this consumer's lifestyle. The U.S. basically started making baby food, like Gerber, right?

They said, you need to feed your baby. You need to buy this baby food. food and feed it to your baby. And this is, you know, you need to start feeding your baby at four months. And at four months, a baby can really only handle period food. But basically this, they wanted you to buy this baby food, right? It's commercialization. They wanted to make a profit. And really what people learned, and now this is the recommendation is you shouldn't even feed a baby, purees or real food until six months because their digestive system, their gut hasn't even fully developed to handle that food. So now we're realizing six months is best. And at six months, they should be having,

they can handle real food. So what happens is it's not a choking hazard at all. You can choke on purees. You can take too much puree down and choke, you know. It's all about reducing choking hazards when you're giving real food. So you're not going to give them a grape tomato and say, here, have that at it. You're going to slice that grape tomato and peel the skin off. So you're always changing the food so it's not a choking hazard. And the way you feed them and you approach it, it's very safe. So people think, oh, you're going to choke because you're eating real food. But, like, what's incredible is I've only given him real food since he's been born.

And now he, like, chews. Like, in the beginning, what happens and scary is they gag. It's not choking. It's gagging. Because a baby's gag reflex is in the center of their tongue, not in the back like ours is, like in the back of our throat. So if there's a little food on the center of their tongue, they go, and they look like they're choking, but they're just gagging and the food comes right out.

So after a few times, they learn. So now Luca, like, I can give him, we give him what we eat. Like, I went and had a veggie burger with soup, potato fries the other day at a restaurant. I, like, just cut up the burger. Like, he's sitting there and eating it. He's only eight months old. And you see him take a bite, chew. And if it's too much, he spits it out.

And then he picks up. So there's reasons why you do it, right? So the reason I picked it is because research has been done now through all these years of pureas and baby food and commercialization of the whole process is that people have more eating issues and disorders now because, they don't know how to eat food until they're full, and they don't know how to pick the foods that they like and eat them because they like them, and it fuels them and nourishes them. So when it ends up happening, if you're spoon feeding, you're always giving them a little bit more,

right? Like, okay, a little bit more. Finish this jar. And the baby's, like, full. They don't want it anymore, but you want the baby to eat because you, so you're literally like teaching them not to listen to their hunger cues. Exactly. So now we have all this years and all this research, And now you can see people like don't know how to eat until they're, I mean, I don't know how to eat until I'm full a lot. You know, like I eat until I have like a tummy ache. So what they've realized is like eating disorders and all these things can be avoided by this method of feeding their baby, which is what like the French do and what like people in England have been doing for years. That's so interesting. And it's.

Well, the French people do it. I mean, I feel like that's like. Not to compare to other countries or whatever, but there's other reasons like taste buds, right? I don't want a kid who eats chicken fingers and fries. I'll never order off the kids menu. Right. So they develop. Which is such a strange concept like to, you know.

Oh, it kills me. I mean, he's having for lunch, I'm going to feed him later. He's having, um, butternut squash, chickpea, sesame balls, curry roasted cabotcha squash and, um, blackberries. Yeah. So like he's having like all these flavors and it's exciting for him to eat. Like. And colorful and good for him.

Yes. Like a healthier way to eat. Exactly. And when you go to restaurants, like socially, he sits there and he eats with us. So like, you don't have. have to feed this kid this puree and then sit there and expect him to sit there while you eat this delicious looking food and be quiet, right? So Lou and I sit down at a restaurant, put him in his chair. And when the food comes, we put him in his chair. And he sits there and eats with us so we can

enjoy our meal. That was a real big reason why I did it too, all these different things. But that's the best decision I could have made for like my marriage, life is a new mom, and hopefully my son. Yeah. Okay. Last one. Have you ever been somewhere in the world where you're like, these people really got it right in terms of living like a good life. And if so, where was it? Hmm. I mean, Californians really live a beautiful life. And that's just in the U.S. Um, you know, I want to say something very cool because I have seen, I've been to a lot of countries. I want to say like Greece or all these Italy and all these places. But honestly, I think the South, I think people, I went to school in North Carolina and people are just relaxed.

And they enjoy simple things in life, like a tea on their porch. Whereas if I'm going to, someone who lives in New York, for instance, you're not sitting on your porch drinking a tea. You're like, you're doing a lot of, you're probably reading, which is another thing. You're not just sitting and enjoying something, right? You're probably consuming a book. You're on your phone. You're doing like just different things. Your mind's racing.

But these people in the South, I think they live it right. I don't know how they do it, but they're just raised to live a slower way of life in a good way. And it's frustrating because you go to Starbucks and it takes you 20 minutes to get a coffee. But they just, I find them less stressed out people. I find them happier people. You always say, people always say when they go down south, everyone's smiling and happy. There's things that they do wrong. There's things that we do wrong, obviously.

But on a whole, I'm always, every time I go, I visit back to college in North Carolina, I just am always impressed by how happy I feel when I'm there. Just I feel more zen there. I feel more relaxed. People just smile at you. I really love it. I love that too. All right.

Well, thank you so much for joining me, Allie. Yeah, thanks for having me. I'm excited about this. Thank you guys so much for listening to this episode. I loved it. It's one of those ones that I love listening back to. I just find Allie so inspiring and so amazing as a human. As always, if you enjoyed it, please, please subscribe and leave a review on iTunes.

It really helps other people find the podcast. And if you feel like there's somebody in your life who could benefit from Allie's wisdom, which is deep and great and amazing, please share the podcast with them so that they can kind of take away whatever lessons that you took away and talk about it with them. Like maybe go out for a friend coffee date and be like, oh my God, did you hear about Ali's mom's kidnapping? Because it's insane. I love when stuff like this actually helps us get closer to the people in our lives in real

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