The Lonely Island and Seth Meyers Podcast - Andy Walking

Episode Date: June 3, 2024

The guys discuss their digital short, Andy Walking, and how they would improve it if they made it now. Plus, they talk about behind the scenes of Andy's Excuse, The Falconer, and Seth's memories of the Anderson Cooper 360 sketch. Andy Walking - https://youtu.be/CLBfOzvi1g0?si=RlJHcJCiZvt0vJtUThe Falconer - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7IYJqpxWXMk&list=PLS_gQd8UB-hIv6c6X-zVPYpUGP2ampmNbAndy's Excuses (The Usual Suspects parody) - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3YjhoB-Ndko (Not all the clips we mention are available online; some never even aired.) If you want to see more photos and clips follow us on Instagram @thelonelyislandpod. Sponsors:AirbnbThe Lonely Island Podcast is supported by Airbnb.  Your home might be worth more than you think.  Find out how much at airbnb.com/host VuoriVuori is offering 20% off your FIRST purchase. Get yourself some of the most comfortable and versatile clothing on the planet at vuori.com/ISLAND.  Not only will you receive 20% off your first purchase, but enjoy free shipping on any U.S. orders over $75 and free returns.  Produced by Rabbit Grin ProductionsExecutive Producers Jeph Porter and Rob HolyszLead Producer Kevin MillerCreative Producer Samantha SkeltonCoordinating Producer Derek JohnsonCover Art by Olney AtwellMusic by Greg Chun and Brent AsburyEdit by Cheyenne JonesMix and Master by Jason Richards

This episode is brought to you by Airbnb. Your home might be worth more than you think. Find out how much at Airbnb.com slash host. It's the Lonely Island and Seth Meyers podcast. Hey, everybody. Welcome to episode 10 of Seth Meyers and the Lonely Island podcast. Is that I feel like at this point I should know. And this is the 10th episode.

It's the final episode about your first season on the show. And I mostly want to talk, well, I want to talk about the digital short. I want to talk about a sketch. This is the Kevin Spacey show. I also, before we get started, want to say that obviously we perceive Kevin Spacey a lot differently now when we're recording this podcast as we did in May of 2006. We don't want to talk about that in fear that it will not match the tone, the glib tone of this podcast. So we just invite everybody,

as a means of a disclaimer, if you don't know what has happened with Kevin Spacey, to look into it. But this is the end of the season, and you guys at this point know well and good that you're off to Vancouver to look into it. But this is the end of the season. And you guys at this point know well and good that you're off to Vancouver to shoot Hot Rod. Are you looking past the season finale? Are you only thinking about Hot Rod? Quite possibly. Like we definitely weren't like, we got to do a song. That's true. Effort wise. Well, that's not fair. I don't want to say you

didn't put in a ton of effort. The result does not look like your hardest digital short to make. I think that's true, but it doesn't mean that we weren't like nervous during the week and feeling like we should do something good. But yeah, you're right. The effort was. I think we were burnt out and we were trying to think of something that would be easy. It certainly looked easy. The digital short that ended your first season, a season full of triumphs, will not make the Criterion Collection of digital shorts. Are we all in agreement? Agreed. Full agree. I watched

it back and was like, that was it. And there were a few moments where I thought, oh, maybe this is it. Nope, that was it. And the name of this digital short is Andy Walking. And I want to say this, which I liked. It is a play on Jay walking a segment that Jay Leno did on his show, but it was not a hit on Jay Leno.

Maybe don't don't emulate. I didn't realize that. And I have to say, I mean, this authentically in 2006, I feel like it was a very easy hacky move to be shitty about Jay Leno. And that was not what this was. No, I mean, there's still segments on Late Night. I don't think on your show, Seth, but I mean, Kimmel still does it and stuff where they go out and ask real people questions. And the tone of them has shifted, I think, a lot since when we made this. I'm pretty sure the idea for this was Matt Murray's. I think I saw one recently where they were just asking people who Mike Pence was and they couldn't answer it, which is very similar. Yes, it's a mixed bag because on the one hand, it's like, let's laugh at how stupid people are, which is what the short is trying to sort of comment on.

But on the other hand, you are often shocked at how much people don't know who Mike Pence is when you ask them on the street. Yeah, I enjoy the Kimmel bits. Me too. I don't want to seem like we're making fun of them, but we are making fun of the general. No, we're making fun of the Leno ones. And by we, I mean Matt Murray, whose idea was and who is not here to defend himself. Yeah. I would be terrified if someone came up to me with a microphone on the street and asked me facts where the assumption was I definitely am supposed to know what they were. Absolutely.

I want to just give a little bit of empathy to the people on the street. Yeah. Now, don't get me wrong. I feel like those people don't know who Mike Pence is. But my God, I would be terrified. I did Kimmel a while back, and they did one where they stopped a woman on the street and asked her to say which president was on each coin and bill. And she got them all right. And we were in

the dressing room watching and I maybe would have gotten three. So yeah, I'm with you. One of the great versions of this that happened recently, have you guys seen the Tennessee Titans schedule release video that was floating around? It's the greatest. And again, I don't want to use this podcast to promote other digital shorts, but the Tennessee Titans social media team, the way they released their schedule

is they went out in Nashville, which is just a party town, whatever that main street in Nashville is, probably main street, but they go out and they just showed people the logo of each team

and had them guess the name of the team, and it was people who didn't know football really trying their hardest to guess. Like the Atlanta Falcons, someone was like, the Fire Stallions. And it's really good. Anyway, sometimes it's fun when it's made lovingly. So anyway, the premise of this is you basically state, we're going to show you how dumb people on the streets are.

And then everybody gets the question right. And you act like they're getting it wrong. You are. And that is the nice part about this. You make yourself the dumb guy in this. Yeah, that's a standard move for us. Who was the first president of the United States? George Washington. And who is the current vice president of the United States? Dick Cheney. This is going to be worse than I thought. It's still kind of charming and nice, but you do expect more from us. I expected more from us. I kept waiting, as you said, for the other shoe to drop, for there to be a turn or a story or a narrative of some sort, something more clever. Yes. The classic one would have been somebody like,

dude, you're wrong. You're wrong. You don't know what you're talking about. And then I go, what? And then I get super sad. And then it cuts shots of me wandering around the city, super depressed. And I'm like, who am I? But then going to a library and starting to learn and going back to college. And then you still get it wrong at the end of it. This all would have been better.

Yeah, we're immediately making it much better. Or there's that moment where John Lutz, SNL writer, 30 Rock cast member, late night with Seth Meyers writer now, you're talking negatively

about him and he notices. And then I thought, oh, this is going to be about Lutz's character getting revenge on you. But all the better ideas we're having would require a second location,

which this sketch does not have. Look, the writer's party is the week of the finale. I think we maybe enjoyed that experience. And it's on Thursday, right? That was a really good party. Yeah, the last SNL of the year, Thursday night

is the writer's party. That means the cast comes as well, I should note. No plus ones though. That's what makes it a spectacular evening out. That's why it was so fun. Yeah. It's a real blow off steamer. And we shot

Andy walking the next morning just for perspective. And you can barely tell. Yeah. And it's fun for me because I still work in this building.

You literally walked out the revolving doors and shot there. Yeah. And then probably walked back in and edited for like 45 minutes. Yeah.

Still managed to act like such a doofus with seemingly endless energy. Some would even argue annoying. You did have some good doofus energy in this one. There's a few moments that made me chuckle, but we really needed that turn. I think we should go back and shoot it, guys. I mean, the end of this, we're going to just start reshooting digital shorts based on the notes we've come up with in the body of each podcast. Were we writing Hot Rod at all? Like rewriting Hot Rod at all at this point? Oh yeah. I'm just trying to like desperately

be like, we were probably doing something else. We were deep into it. It was May 20th, 2006, and we started shooting in July. Oh yeah. Then that's why. I don't know when. I feel like it's this week is when Lorne asks if I want to come out to Vancouver. I feel like Lorne was the one who asked me to go be on the set for Hot Rod. Yeah, probably. Yeah. He might have asked us first if we would like that. Okay. Yes.

And what did we say, Keith? No. No. All collectively. Just immediately. No. There's a way about Lorne, though. You kind of just want to listen to him, you know, when immediately. No! There's a way about Lauren, though. You kind of just want to listen to him, you know,

when he threatens to fire you. And then it turned out to be the best thing that ever happened to us. I got to go out to Vancouver. I got to work on the movie. You guys, I feel like we're going to obviously talk about Hot Rod at some point. You guys all shared a house. I was in a really depressing sort of corporate hotel. Why didn't you live with us?

Yeah. It's bizarre. I don't know. But Bill and McBride were also in that hotel. That's right. Bill and McBride were also there. The other thing about working on a movie versus working on SNL, you work at SNL and there's so much hangout time.

You work super hard, but you hang out a ton. Working on a movie is almost no hangout time. Yeah. It was super long days and then everybody was super tired and we didn't really do that much that was fun. Is that your memory? It would just be Saturdays, basically. Yeah. We got to walk around the park with Lauren. Oh, right.

Going long walks around Vancouver Island or whatever that place is called. Do you know that summer I had knee trouble and my doctor said, are you walking a lot? I realized that I had hurt my knee just walking with Lauren. 35 years my senior. Couldn't keep up. He's not fucking around. How? The walk was just so long, you hurt your knee?

It was like a five mile, what is that walk in Vancouver? Stanley Park? Yeah, Stanley Park. Stanley Park. Yes, that's the one. And it was a crazy five mile walk. And by the way, it was so much easier for me than Lauren because it's hard to walk and talk, which is what Lauren was doing. And I the way, it was so much easier for me than Lauren because it's hard to

walk and talk, which is what Lauren was doing. And I was just walking and listening. Yeah. And I still I feel like it's because it was a circle and we always went the one way. You were always turning left the whole time. I was always turning left for a whole summer. Yeah. It's like a ridge runner has like a one leg that's longer, you know, because they're always Yeah, it was your left leg that messed up. do remember going on a walk with lauren and having a full head of steam because the next season i was going to be head writer for the show i was very excited about that had a lot of ideas and i remember basically the first mile of the walk telling lauren all my novel ideas for how to change up the show things i wanted to do as the head writer and lauren did that where he sort

of answers in a riddle for you to solve he He goes, do you know how many head writers have told me, this is how I'm going to fix the show? And I was like, no, this isn't. You're like, six? Three. I feel like that's the opposite of full steam ahead on all that. Do you remember any of those ideas? Did you really actually have some new ideas?

I did. I wanted to just have pre-taped short 30 second things that would play after sketches so that you just like have a just more kinetic energy. And I think it was probably based on how successful the digital shorts have been. It was like leaning into having more pre-taped elements to get to more things. Oh, cool. Well, I mean, that has kind of come to pass. That did happen. Yeah. Yeah. Classically ahead of my time. Yeah, but you wanted like interstitials. Yeah, a little bit more interstitially.

That's basically what we were doing on Awesome Town, if it had come to be, because we kept shooting little like 20 second, 30 second, one minute little pieces that were going to kind of glue the sketches together as opposed to doing a live audience like Key and Peele or Chappelle Show or that sort of thing. The digital short, I should also note, this digital short, Andy Walking, I think there was a sense that it was not cream of the crop. It did play pretty late in the show.

How late? It was two sketches after update. Yeah, that's pretty late. As I remember it though, it was a decent show, right? It was a decent show. It was also too short to really do a proper set change, wig change, I remember. So it didn't really help

Lorne in that regard. Yeah, so it didn't help Lorne at all. We refused to make it longer, mercifully. That was always a credit to you guys. You had a real integrity when he asked for another 30 seconds. We were like, America can't handle that, Lorne. I remember you guys once saying, how do you know that 15 years from now

we're not going to be doing a recap podcast? Yeah. We got to stand by this length, this runtime. There was a falconer. I forgot. So, Jorm, you kind of stepped into the falconer shoes. I did. We haven't mentioned the falconer.

I kind of feel like maybe a little bit lost to history. People maybe don't talk about the falconer as much as they should. The Falconer had quite a few sketches. We were all fans of The Falconer before we got to this show. In 1992, Ken Mortimer was an advertising executive in Baltimore, Maryland. Then, for reasons known only to him, he left his wife and career and moved deep into the forest.

Now, he is known only as the Falconer. Slovin and Allen, who wrote the original sketches with Will Forte, were on the show before us, and I think that they had done at least three or four before we got to the show. The story that I believe is true as to how they first wrote the Falconer is Slovin and Allen decided to open a dictionary, pick a word, and write a sketch about whatever it was. I love that. Is that true? I believe that to be true.

Oh, my God. That's wonderful. I mean, it's pretty risky, but we should probably get Forte to record a voice note with the 30-second cap to tell us if it's true that Falconer came from a dictionary. But for those who forget, basically, Forte was a Falconer.

He had a falcon named Donald, again, very ahead of his time, and a was a falconer. He had a falcon named Donald, again, very ahead of his time, and a very selfish falcon. But the falconer would fall victim to a fallen boulder or his foot would get caught in a bear trap, and he would send the falcon for help. And then there would just be the whole first minute was Forte, I should note, screaming, Screaming as the Falconer.

Oh, Donald. Donald! Oh, Donald. So much of it was pre-taped puppet work of the Falcon would always, instead of going to get help, would go to a casino or a strip club. A Falconer week, so much time went into it because it was a puppet Falcon doing all these things. And it would be staged pre-tapes.

Staged pre-tapes. Yes, and then this one was also very complicated, but all going to be happening live because it was a time travel episode. Wait, that time machine I was always talking about building out of trees, dirt, and gumption? You built it, and today it will save Donald for life! Donald! No!

You blithering fool! You distracted me from my sense of purpose! Oh, so this is all my fault! Oh, look, it's time to stop arguing and start time traveling! We must go back in time to the point before Donald was shot. To the time machine! So by the end, I think there were 16 Falconer. It was the entirety of the cast. Right, the cast all had the Falconer wig, beard, and shirt on.

Yes, and we're all saying, oh, Donald. I have photos, like really bad old cell phone photos of like Wig and maybe Bill wearing the Falconer outfit. To the time machine. This is a good one. No one wrote denser premises than Forte. And so this was a pretty late in the run. This may very well be the final Falconer.

And it would make sense that it would be the most confusing and hard to follow. Yeah, I think 16 people will say To the Time Machine. This was called Falconer Across the Falconverse. I should note that both Andy and Jorma are in the new Spider-Verse movie, and they're both great. Or is it old? By the time people hear this, probably old now.

I don't want to give away when we're filming this. I will only tell you that the skies of New York are yellow with the smoke of burnt Canadian timber. Oh, well, that could be any time. Luckily, that will be happening in the future, too. Let's just say there's enough time between episodes for Seth to forget what we're calling the podcast every time. It's true. So each podcast starts with Seth going, I know.

This is, I get that the Seth Meyers Lonely Island podcast. So however many weeks, months, or years you think it takes between them to forget the title. Like our voices have changed. Andy has been, and I say this with sympathy, Andy has been too sick to do a podcast for like two and a half months. I don't know that I can be solely blamed.

I'm being sympathetic to the fact that a lot of times you are, you know, too sick to do a podcast. I think that's a real sickness. I mean, yes, over the last few months, that's been the case. Yeah. Yeah. We've all had our stuff. I mean, you could argue that it's your fault. Me?

Yeah, because I came to do your show. Oh, yeah, because you came to New York and then you got long COVID. Yeah. Our gift bag had long COVID. God, we got so fucked up, though, Seth. Me and you just fucking partied. We did. Worth it.

Oh, my God, bro. We fucking took it to the mat, bitch. You guys don't live in New York City, but I know a lot of you think like, hey, Andy had said you have kids. You can't rock hard. Well, we actually did. Have pasta dinner, then go back to my apartment,

drink a little bit of whiskey, and then Andy got sick for two and a half months. That's right. Well worth it. Rage-aholics. We watched I Think You Should Leave on Andy's phone. Before it drops. Before it drops.

NBD, unpaid producer. Congrats. You guys are doing a lot of unpaid producing work. Is that going well? Oh, man. That's where it's at. That's the only kind to do that's worth doing. The Lonely Island Podcast is supported by Airbnb.

Seth, I don't know if you know this, but when I was out in Los Angeles when we were making Popstar, I had to stay at seven different places. Get out of town. Yeah, because we kept editing for seven and a half months. And five of those places were Airbnbs. And I got to say, my experience was lovely in each one of them. I stayed in every kind of location around Los Angeles.

And the whole time I was thinking, I should be doing this same thing because these houses are just making moolah for people. And I never did. And you know what? I don't know if you know this about me, but I hate leaving money on the table. Did you know that? I hate leaving money on the table. You'll go back and you'll take the tip we've left the waitstaff.

And we have to say that money is supposed to be on the table. I've done that many times and you've told me not to so many times. But you know what? I hated leaving it on the table, so I got to go back. Well, I'm glad you finally came to that realization, Jorm, because a lot of people don't realize they might have an Airbnb of their own right under their noses. Your home might be worth more than you think. Find out how much at airbnb.com slash host.

Support for The Lonely Island and Seth Meyers podcast comes from Viore. Huh. Huh. Huh. What am I doing, Seth? Yorm, are you working out? I'm working out right now. Oh, my God. What are you wearing to work out in? A tuxedo. Oh, Yorm, you shouldn't work out in a tuxedo.

You should work out in clothes from Viore. Oh, what's that? Well, it's incredibly versatile and comfortable. It's designed to look great in everyday life, even outside the gym, even though you're hardly ever outside the gym, right, Jorm? I'm a gym rat. Can I wear it on the red carpet, though? That's the only thing, because this tux looks good. Jorm, it's a fresh take on athleisure and a staple in your wardrobe, the Sunday Performance Joggers. Oh my God, Jorm, you've got to get yourself a pair

of Sunday Performance Joggers. It sounds great, Seth, all of this. Honestly, I'm going to say it sounds more comfortable than working out in this tux, which is a little tight-fitting, I've got to say. Jorm, do you prefer things to have more style and less comfort, or more comfort and less style? Me wanty both, Seth. Well, good news. Viore is equal parts style and comfort. It's also an investment in your happiness.

For our listeners, they're offering 20% off your first purchase. Get yourself some of the most comfortable and versatile clothing on the planet at viore.com slash island. That's V-U-O-R-I.com slash island. Not only will you receive 20% off your first purchase, but enjoy free shipping on any US orders over $75 in free returns. Go to viore.com slash island and discover the versatility of Viore clothing. All right, I'm going to get back to this workout. The show's about to go through some changes. This is a big summer. Yeah.

I don't think we add anybody, but the cast thins out and it kind of becomes the lean cast that, for my money, I think we know where I stand on it. The greatest cast in the history of the show. A golden era. Yes.

It was a very exciting time. Now, you guys had a better sketch than your digital short and it's high up in the show and it is called Andy and Kevin Backstage. It's act three.

That's still pretty good. Andy and Kevin Backstage, you guys wrote it and it is a very clever take on usual suspects that the audience does not see coming which is why it works perfectly much like usual suspects you have no idea and it's weird how this worked because half of it was live address and you can tell because the eye lines are terrible because it's in a dressing room and

the dressing room is too tight and you can tell it's very hard are terrible because it's in a dressing room and the dressing room is too tight and you can tell it's very hard to find his cards, so it looks bad. But then it goes to a pre-tape and it gets really good. It should have been all pre-taped. It's crazy that it wasn't. I believe that the ask was, after we wrote it, that much like older 80s SNL stuff, there was a desire for it to seem like it really was happening live.

Right. But then it absolutely doesn't because anyone, any layman could tell the moment it goes from live to pre-taped. Yes. Because it all of a sudden gets super sharp. Very Falconer-esque, actually. Yeah. But basically, and again, a little bit of spoiler alert,

both on the sketch and on Usual Suspects. But Andy, you come in Kevin's mad that you're late and you tell a story about why, yeah I'll save it, I'm not buying it I was in a cab on the way to the show, okay, but I guess

Kofi Annan was making a speech at the UN so traffic was terrible so I decided to take the subway and I'm on the subway, and you know those bald street performer guys who paint themselves gold and ask for change? Yeah. Well, there were two of them on my train, and they got in a

fight, so I had to give a statement to a pair of police officers because I was the only person there. When you got out of the elevator, Stone Phillips was there. Mm-hmm. And, oh, Radiohead, you ask Kevin Spacey if he likes Radiohead. Yeah.

And then you say, I wanted to give you Radiohead tickets because as soon as I saw you, I felt guilty. Again, not a laugh has happened. No.

No, a lot of buildup. Dry as a bone. Dry as a bone and kind of jankily shot. Yeah. At this point, it's a bad piece of sketch comedy.

Yeah, everyone's like, da fuck? Da fuck. Yeah. Everyone's like, da fuck? Da fuck. Everyone's like, I was promised Andy walking. And we were all, you're going to have to wait. Then Kevin Spacey turns around. You've won him over with these Radiohead tickets. He takes a sip of tea.

Then he drops it. He realizes something. He drops it. Like usual suspect, hits the ground, shatters. Now we're in a pre-tape. Same location, but now all the edits are super tight everything looks good and we're playing the voiceover of your story again but i guess kofi annan was making a speech at the un

decided to take the subway those bald dancing guys that paint themselves gold there were two of them give a statement to a pair of police officers me and some bum who looked like red fox and who gets in my elevator stone phillips do you like Radiohead? How did I not see that? So we have our first laugh from the audience is the recognition that this is a usual suspects sketch. Yes, the cup dropping, everyone knew the moment, which was a huge relief, obviously. You see a photo of Kofi Annan, very one for one.

Then you see a Subway sandwich. That's how you came up with Subway. Yeah. The two gold painted guys, picture of Kevin Spacey holding his two Oscars. Right. I should note in the script, it was not in the actual sketch,

but the way you guys wrote it in the sketch, which made me laugh, and I don't know if it was just like too hard a move, was when he sees the picture of his Oscars, it makes him happy for a second. And then we hear you say, I gave a statement to a pair of police officers. There is the band police album next to a pair, the fruit. That one doesn't quite

work. It's working for me right now. I know. Red Fox. There's a stuffed. The reason this doesn't work is a stuffed brown Fox. What? That hurts you guys. I mean, sure. By the way, I know what happens. I'm sure that is technically a taxidermied red fox. It is way less red than it needed to be for the joke. That's color correct. Yeah, that was our fault. Now you're hurting a little bit. I will say, I think that's two in a row where the audience now thinks they're ahead of you.

We hear Stone Phillips cuts to a stone, pans to a Phillips head screwdriver. You got the audience back. Radio head, a transistor radio next to a sever head screwdriver, you got the audience back. Radio head, a transistor radio next to a severed silver head. Again, they're like, not quite with you. What? I'm just telling you, I watched it and saw how it played. But then, the coup de grace.

We hear you say, and we pan with each word. As soon as I, picture of an eyeball, we're just panning across a shelf where all these things are. As soon as I, picture of an eyeball, we're just panning across a shelf where all these things are. As soon as I, picture of an eyeball, saw a hand saw, you, picture of a sheep, I, the letter I, felt,

it's just a picture of green felt on the wall, gill, there's an upside down fish with a red arrow on the fish pointing at the gill, tea, and a tea bag. Oh yeah. Then Kevin runs out.

Now it's live again. Immediately, bad, it gets worse. He runs out to the page desk. Yorma cameo. Oh yeah. Yorma says, you just got a fax, which is again, a callback to Usual Suspects. Yorma hands Andy the fax,

and it is a caricature of Andy saying, I lied. Looking pretty doofy. Yeah. That was not how it was scripted, because I read the script first, and I kind of liked the script. I know why it changed.

But in the original script, the whole time a fax was running, because that also is happening in the movie. Ah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And the fax, it's a police sketch of Andy with the words, instead of, I lied, which, by the way, I lied was going to play better, yeah, yeah, yeah. And the facts, it's a police sketch of Andy with the words instead of I lied, which by the way,

I lied was going to play better, but this made me laugh. It was a picture of you and it just said, remember that movie? Oh, I do like that. Oh, that's way better.

Yeah, that is better. Oh, we lost that argument. Remember that movie is the rewrite between Dress and Air and I'm sure what happened is they were like, oh, I know what happened. They used that part from Dress because you didn And I'm sure what happened is they were like, oh, I know what happened.

They used that part from Dress because you didn't do it again in there. Oh, yeah. So we didn't get a chance. You didn't get a chance to make any changes. Only changes you could edit. All right. Got it.

So we thought of Remember That Movie and didn't get to shoot it. Yeah. So you guys did come up with a better version. But then for some reason, I think Lauren said, let's just use the whole thing let's turn it into a pre-tape now yeah i feel like it was the cold open at dress and then it got moved

back and that's probably why interesting well you know what probably happened huh the cold open at air was such a banger they had to move it up it's the time for seth's corner who wrote that i guess it's time for seth Corner. What a seamless transition. Seth's Corner, you're all invited. Seth's Corner, it's happening right now. Take it away, Seth. Well, guys, it's an Anderson Cooper 360. And this, I know for a fact, is the final Anderson Cooper 360

because when we come back in the fall, I will be a co-anchor of weekend update with my friend amy poehler and america's long national nightmare of watching me host sketches as andrew scooper is over oh my god i really did enjoy i feel like well first of all again this is 2006 all the jokes are about how handsome andrew scooper is and he looks exactly the same so shout out to anderson cooper yeah not sure if he's a listener but i think i told you guys the first time I met Anderson Cooper was at my gym and he said, hi, Seth. And I went over to say hi. And he was on a treadmill and it was at the fastest speed at the highest incline. And he talked like we were just standing there. But he still does that.

It was like nothing I'd ever seen before. Made Lorne going on a walk seem like you going on a walk. Yeah. There was an Anderson Cooper 360 cold open. And again, you know, I apologize. You guys got knocked down the running order. But, you know, at some point, it's just good to be in the show. Absolutely. The funny thing is it's about sending U.S. troops to the border, to the Mexican border.

So time is a flat circle. This is 2006. It's very similar stuff. Kenan is a National Guardsman who's super psyched to be going to the border instead of Iraq. For me, the highlight,

and again, I really enjoyed writing Daryl Hammond as Arnold Schwarzenegger. One of my favorite impressions. And it was all stuff that he brought. He had this impression

of Arnold Schwarzenegger that was so fun to write because he would always say all this and all that. That was the thing that his Arnold Schwarzenegger would say. He would end sentences with or some such thing.

And things of that nature, maybe as well. Yeah. And things of that nature. I would steal his uniform and infiltrate his unit and things of that nature. I do remember that.

It was the best. And it was a really good... Sometimes the prosthetics can get a little over the top, but it was great. It was genuinely super funny when he showed up on screen. I will say, having watched Daryl for so many years before we worked there, when we did finally work there,

getting to see him do that stuff live, we were like, oh my God. Not just him, getting to see him do that stuff live. We were like, oh my God. Not just him, like getting to see like Bill and Fred and Wig do impressions and stuff as well. We were just like, God damn, how do people do it this well? Yeah. And with timing and with like a perspective. It's a whole other skill set, obviously.

And it was something that was very like shocking to see live for me. And the thing about Daryl's that was always so shocking to me is he didn't just do the voice. He would like take on their charisma. He was so charismatic when he was doing Bill Clinton and sketches. Yeah. So it wasn't just the voice. You wanted to hang out with that dude because he seemed like he was having so much fun where then he did Arnold Schwarzenegger and there was he did it with no charisma and it was equally funny. Like, he knew exactly how it was, I agree with you.

Great. The best? Yeah, love you. And then in the end, there was heavy flooding in the Northeast and again, sometimes you just

got the right tools in the toolbox, right? Schwarzenegger is in the news so you get Daryl and then there's flooding in the Northeast and Rachel Dratch

happens to be there to be an angry New Englander. Joining us now is Peabody, Massachusetts, resident Pat Danaher. Pat, how bad is the situation? Apparently not bad enough to get you up here, Cooper. If we were in New Orleans, you would have been here

before the first drop hit the ground. What happened? Did you lose your slicker? Thanks, Seth. You did a great job. That's been Seth Conner. See you next time. That was really good.

Do you think this is the final Lobster Claw and Handlebar dress rehearsal death? You know what? I think, yeah, a requiem for Lobster Claw and Handlebar, because I do believe this is the final. For me, it was 50 first dates, that movie 50 First Dates, but it was 50 first funerals. Oh, yeah. Because I just had to keep reliving the Saturday where For me, it was 50 first dates, that movie 50 first dates, but it was 50 first funerals. Oh, yeah. Because I just had to keep reliving the Saturday where I thought, each time. It hurt just as bad each time. Worse. But you learned a lesson.

I will say there's a sketch that got cut called Spirit of the Wolf, written by Fred Armisen, that I'm pretty sure is a store in an airport that sells shirts with wolves on it. There was a Vincent Price that didn't go to air, which is interesting because obviously now everyone knows

Bill Hader's Vincent Price sketch is kind of a smash hit thing that aired a bunch of times. But I do remember this first season that he was on with us, there was a little bit of a struggle to figure out exactly how to format it yes but everyone knew he had an awesome take and it was really funny and he did it in his audition and everything i agree it does sort of start finding its way into having three other really good parts really good impressions yeah it's about funny things that go wrong and he becomes just very put upon that turns into what his vincent price. Yes. But yeah, cut Vincent Price,

which is a remember to the kids out there. Stick it out. Okay, go ahead. What song did Nelly Furtado sing? She sang two, but give me one. I mean, I have already looked, so it won't be a guess. Oh, you already know.

I wouldn't have gotten either. Timbaland was there. That's pretty cool. What's her most famous song? I'm like a bird, I'm on a family. That's what I thought, but that was her previous album. This was her next album, I believe. This is Promiscuous Girl.

I can't sing that one, but that one's famous. Promiscuous Girl's a good track. That was a big hit. That was just playing at a coffee shop today. Me and Keith have been talking about how basically everywhere we go now, there's early 90s hip-hop playing. It's that. It's 90s era hip- hop that makes me feel old.

Yeah. Especially because my son also is like, oh, hip hop. That's something dad likes. I'm like, what? Right. So when you go in and like an early Jay-Z song is playing or Souls of Mischief, is it like when we were kids and like Motown, like Marvin Gaye or even like, wait a minute, Mr. Postman was playing?

No, it's not to that point yet. But I do think, oh, the people who are owning and running this restaurant are my age and they're also old. Yeah. But I don't think of it as like Motown. They're not trying to make us feel comfortable. They just like it. Yeah. My seven-year-old had a school dance and it was all, I feel like, second grade and younger. It was in like the gym, but the DJ was playing Apple Bottom Jeans and I definitely have been in a nightclub where they were playing it. And that made me feel like I was at my own funeral. The song I had heard in a nightclub was now so anodyne to just be like kids dancing around with glow sticks. I felt like I died in a house and my ghost still lived there and nobody could hear or

see me. You were kind of like a Vecna. Yeah. Classic Vecna. Yeah. I didn't like that. I didn't like that at all. And I took the microphone and said as much.

Okay, good. I made a bit of a scene about it. It's also not an appropriate song. Seth, do you want to hear my standup joke about this phenomenon? Yeah. So when I'm at a restaurant now and they start playing Wu-Tang, I go, Ah, shit. And then I go, Ah, shit.

Because it just means I'm old. That's good. Yeah. That's why I quit stand-up. Because of that. Because that's what I would be doing. And then everyone would be like, Fuck you, you piece of shit. And they'd be like, Fucking kill me.

I deserve it. You know what I mean? Mm-hmm. I do. It be like, fucking kill me. I deserve it. You know what I mean? I do. It is interesting, though. Here's the thing that I haven't cracked as a stand-up joke. So I'll just share it with the pod. Our parents, their dangerous music, they could play for us and not have to worry about covering our ears.

Yes. That's right. You know what I mean? Yeah. Like, there was no Ice cube equivalent for our parents. Yes. If we play the songs of our youth. It's a problem.

Most of them are more offensive than even today's offensive music. There are some exceptions. Yes. Don't the Beatles have a song called Horny Little Devil? I remember my parents running in during Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds being like, no, it's about acid. wearing Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds, being like, no, it's about acid.

It does make you feel old when I'm annoyed that there aren't more censored albums on streaming. When I'm like, where are all the censored? Oh, man. You can get a few, but even our albums, one of them you can't get. Yeah, we didn't bother to do it all the time, and now I regret that. Really?

And you can't retroactively? What's a song that is too dirty to play to your kids that you wish you could play to your kids? I mean, every one of our songs is too dirty to play. There's only YOLO, and there's maybe like one or two others, but... I just play them for them now, but my kids are older.

Isn't there a clean version of I'm on a Boat, say? I feel like there is. Yeah, yeah. There is. It's just bleeped to all hell. But we did that whole album. In Credit Bad, we did a clean, quote unquote, censored version. And Turtleneck and Chain.

It's just we don't have the third one. I blew it super hard. So I don't know if you guys remember. Andy, you did a voice. Or I don't know. Maybe you don't remember. You've had a very busy career. Oh, man.

Thanks for saying that. Anyway, Shoemaker and I had a show called The Awesomes, a superhero show. Three seasons on Hulu. Of course I remember, Seth. Thanks, bud. Do you remember your character's name? Nope. And again, we made a superhero show,

and the least interesting part about it is it's dirty. And it's not real dirty, but there's too many beeps. And now I've got a seven-year-old who loves it, and yet I'm like, who? It was trying to be too cool when we didn't need to be. Because again, we're making a cartoon at the time that, it's still the time obviously, but you have South Park and you have things like that.

And you're like, yeah, we should be a little more dangerous with our show. And it's such a drag now because my son really likes watching it. And every now and then there's some, I don't know, sexual innuendo. And you realize, I don't think anybody was watching the superhero show for that. Okay. Well, Keev, now that you have kids that you can play cursing for, do you appreciate that we were so dirty or are

you like what Seth just said? You wish that we had toned it down a little bit. It's less that I guess it's more, I mean, I think we talked about this, but it's for all SNL. What we really didn't care about was being really dirty or really scary with no warning it was going to happen on the show. Like, you know, an update joke could quickly flash Freddy Krueger's face in a way that a kid who had never seen Freddy Krueger would go, oh, what was that? In a way that could give them nightmares. And we would not have thought twice about something like that. Because we'd be like, yeah, it's a Freddy Krueger joke. Here's an image of Freddy Krueger. It's midnight, who cares? And now when I'm watching with my kids,

they like watching SNL, but they're afraid it's going to scare them or show them something that they don't want to see. It's going to haunt their dreams, literally. So I would have been more cognizant of not scaring or putting something dirty in the middle of something that's not dirty for no reason kind of thing so in your verse for i'm on a boat you stand by the fact that you curse 16 times and andy doesn't curse at all yeah that's fine okay yeah that means uncle andy can come over anytime he wants pretty much an open invite axel now every night wants me to tell him a superhero story where he picks like seven superheroes that need to be in the story

Yeah, and then last night said you can pick the bad guy and so I'm just running out It's exhausting coming up with a superhero story Oh, yeah But I said the bad guy is gonna be killer croc and I tell the story and he said what does killer croc look like? And I'm like, I'll just Google and I you know I haven't seen killer croc in a long time and And so I Google image on my phone in his bed. And it's the most terrifying drawing of Killer Croc. And then an hour later, he has a nightmare and Alexi goes.

And I'm like, what was it about? She was like, I don't like half man, half crocodile. And I'm like, oh, where did they come up with this stuff? Oh, kids today. Well, anyways, good night. Try not to wake me up next time. You know, William Goldman,

who wrote Princess Bride, was just telling those stories, making them up to his daughters at bedtime, and then wove it into the book, and then that became the screenplay, and there you go.

Yeah, so start making stuff up. The problem is my kids only like stories about IP. Right. It's hard to secure that. Is that a problem or is that a blessing? That's true. Also, we have The Awesomes. I'm going to keep that. But is that a problem or is that a blessing? You know?

That's true. Also, we have the awesomes. I'm going to keep pitching the awesomes available to stream on Hulu. But we made for one of the season premieres at Comic-Con,

it was packs of awesome cards. And it was the same eight cards. It was the eight characters and we were just handing them out. And so Shoemaker had a bunch of them in his office and he said, oh, if your kids like them,

give them these packs of cards. So I gave Ash and Axel a pack of these cards and they loved them. And then Ash put them in his little binder where he has baseball cards and Pokemon cards and he brought it to school. And the next day he's like, I'm going to say something that's going to hurt your feelings. And I said, what is it? He goes, nobody wanted the awesomes cards. And he said, one of my friends said the fact that your dad has a show called The Awesomes and he's in it is very selfish. I'm like, I don't think he's using selfish right now.

Wait, hold on. Was he trying to trade the cards, though? Yes. He was like, who wants an Awesomes card? And I guess kids responded the way you guys did when Lauren said, do you want Seth on Hot Rod? It was like, no. Is that our next episode? Is that what we're talking about?

We are going to do an Awesomes recap until we get to Andy's episode, which I remember. No, I was talking about Hot Rod. Episode one, season three. He played a seaman. Which is a pun. Yeah, it was.

There were a lot of seaman jokes. Okay, I was talking about our work on the movie Hot Rod. Oh, yeah, we are going to do Hot Rod. We are going to do a Hot Rod episode. There's going to be a lot to talk about with Hot Rod. We should do an Awesomes one, too. We should.

We should. Or I guess this kind of counts as it. Yeah, I think we've covered it. So this is episode 10. I feel like if we think about this podcast in

seasons, this is sort of the end of season one. But we're going to do an episode about Hot Rod. And I feel like we should also do a bonus episode about Noodles in the Pot. Yeah.

I mean, how long are we going to run from it? I'm so down. Great. Yes, please. You know, assuming I'm healthy. No, obviously. It's a dice roll. Keep me away from Seth because that guy is my downfall. You have long Sandberg. Don't go to any eight o'clock dinners. I feel like we didn't talk enough about how, first of all, no one went longer without getting COVID than you, Andy. It's true. Congrats. Thank you. And that was shocking because you were incredibly sickly in your years at SNL. That's right.

And I feel like that has not been the case. You've been leading a very robust, healthy life in Los Angeles. You could almost say I suffered for my art. God, would you say that? Almost. I'm not going to say it. I could almost. Yeah, I wouldn't expect you to.

I said almost. It would be crazy for you to fully do it. All right, you guys, that wraps up the first season of Lonely Islands. Time at SNL. Our next episode is going to be very exciting. One of the biggest ones yet. We are going to talk about the film Hot Rod. Hear us then.

The Lonely Island and Seth Meyers podcast is supported by Airbnb.