The Lonely Island and Seth Meyers Podcast - Listener Q&A Episode 6

Episode Date: April 22, 2025

It’s a listener episode! This week The Lonely Island (without) Seth Meyers answer listener questions and break out fun photos from the past! Voicemails, emails, burning curiosities — see if yours ...made the cut! Head to The Lonely Island YouTube channel to watch the video so you don’t miss out on the BTS photos! Strange Brew Trailer - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2pacru8ve9k Monty Python's Flying Circus - "Working Class Playwright" - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rQDeU6dHX-c Black Moon - Who Got Da Props? - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KfCaacYKN6s Deltron 3030 - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yCHC_FHtFyM&list=OLAK5uy_novdY7OAt-flzEnq_8ukR2zjNQaAmcuio LL Cool J: Pink Cookies In A Plastic Bag Getting Crushed By Buildings - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ky86VmsMBTI LL Cool J: Milky Cereal - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RUpaweZKCBw Sandra Boynton’s COWS (Moosic Video) The Seldom Herd - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z1f9b7sX_XY Wrath of the Math - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9hffk-AxI-Q Support our sponsors: Maker's Mark This episode of The Lonely Island Podcast is brought to you by our friends at Maker's Mark. You too can celebrate the spirited women in your life with a free personalized label to go with a bottle of Maker’s Mark! Head to makersmarkpersonalize.com and fill in the details in order to create and mail your custom label. MAKER'S MARK MAKES THEIR BOURBON CAREFULLY. PLEASE ENJOY IT THAT WAY. Maker's Mark® Kentucky Straight Bourbon Whisky, 45% Alc./Vol. ©2025 Maker's Mark Distillery, Inc., Loretto, KY. Shopify Sign up for your one-dollar-per-month trial and start selling today at SHOPIFY.COM/LONELYISLAND HomeChef For a limited time, Home Chef is offering our listeners FIFTY PERCENT OFF and free shipping for your first box PLUS free dessert for life! Go to HomeChef.com/ISLAND Cremo Head to Target or Target.com to find Cremo’s new line of antiperspirants and deodorants in the Italian Bergamont and Palo Santo scents

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Starting point is 00:00:00 This episode of the Lonely Island podcast is brought to you by our friends at Makers Mark. We are celebrating Women's History Month by recognizing the spirited women in our lives and remembering Makers Mark co-founder Margie Samuels. You too can celebrate the spirited women in your life with a free personalized label to go with a bottle of Makers Mark. Head to makersmarkpersonalize.com and fill in the details in order to create and mail your custom label. Makers Mark makes their bourbon carefully. Please enjoy it that way. Makers Mark, Kentucky straight bourbon whiskey,
Starting point is 00:00:35 45% alcohol per volume. Copyright 2025, Makers Mark Distillery, Incorporated Loretto, Kentucky. The Lonely Island and Seth Meyers Podcast Show. Guys, before we start this here podcast, I would like to bring up that the Vest Gate has been really hurtful to me personally. There's been a lot of comments that were put up on our Instagram. How many are there, Keith?
Starting point is 00:01:07 Just looking at the Lonely Myers Pod Instagram and it has 949 comments about the vest. To be fair, you asked for it. You wrote way in on the comments. That's true, but I was thinking that everyone's gonna be really nice to me. You wrote way in on the comments. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:01:23 I actually just got an email from everyone involved in Watergate and they said they're offended that you used the gate. Oh, well now I'm offended by that. Phrasing for Vestgate. That they know what they did was bad, but to compare them to this was really hurtful. Which is weird, because this is not live.
Starting point is 00:01:40 How do they know? Because what they did was way worse or because what they did was way better? They just felt like it was minimizing what they did. Oh, okay. All right. Can I just say that I thought I was a more popular character on the show to be so lambasted. These are all sent with love, I think. I'm going to just read some from the very top. I wish I had...
Starting point is 00:02:03 Did you just refer to yourself as a character on the show? Yeah, he's not being himself. You know that. No. Oh, no. No. I mean, but the vest was me. First off, let's just say, what's gonna happen? We don't have Seth. Yeah, it's gonna be a mess. I know. We're into the unknown. But wait, Yoram, what's your real voice then
Starting point is 00:02:20 if you're playing a character most of the time? I'm so glad you asked that, Andy. I knew that was chaos. There's the normal guy. Anyway, but let's go back to the show! Oh my god. Lin-Manuel Miranda wrote, this vest seems destined to conceal a Quado. And then he also said that he's in parentheses laughing so hard at all the comments.
Starting point is 00:02:43 Thank you, Quaid Army. I also want to thank the Quaid army for just snuggling in with that name so hard. Uh, I'm just going to read, I guess these are the top ones. I don't know how it organized it. This person wrote also wish I had Yoram's memory so I could forget I ever saw this vest. Dagwood. Like that's a harsh tone. A lot of people said, I don't know what I expected, but this isn't it.
Starting point is 00:03:06 That seemed like a pretty common one. Yeah, there were a lot of comments that were comparing me to a bag of trash, I noticed. Which is- Oh, normal guy wearing a normal vest. Like Dreamgirl. Yeah. Bag of trash. Like Dreamgirl references, our own work being used against me to compare me to a bag of
Starting point is 00:03:21 trash. I thought you guys were being hard on him, but actually you were being really easy on him. One of the comments that I didn't like, which was from, I believe, Bayes sent this in, said that I looked like a goth crossing guard. That's good. This person says, and this is why Andy said he would go to
Starting point is 00:03:38 Keev first for the fashion advice. It's a good call back to earlier. Shots fired and hit. Quaid army official uniform. That's good. One of them was that I think it was, I'm gonna paraphrase here, but it said that I looked like a lifeguard
Starting point is 00:03:53 at a pool on the Death Star. That's right. Different kind of guard. Andy did say that Yorma takes the most risks in his wardrobe. That's true. That was your quote. Okay. Can I tell you the one comment that I really appreciated?
Starting point is 00:04:09 Yeah. Sure. It was just, this vest fucks. Yeah, there you go. I love that one. This person wrote, they hate to see a sleeveless quaid coming. That's right. They do. Yorm, was the vest expensive?
Starting point is 00:04:25 I want people now to guess what they think the vest cost. Oh, so the vest saga continues. Yes, because Danny, who is Keef's assistant on the old Naked Gun movie, he was rocking that vest every night of your shoots, Keef. Yeah, it was cold nights, and it was... But not that he has the same vest, it was literally Jorama's vest.
Starting point is 00:04:47 And everybody loved it on Danny, which really was a bummer for me. Every time I put it on. Did he have a hooded sweatshirt on under it? Like he had something puffier underneath. No, it's his whole style is better than mine. So it just somehow worked for him. And he had it unzipped as well. It just looked like a crew guy, like a more natural fit.
Starting point is 00:05:04 It just looked right on him, but he kept asking me how much it cost. And then by day four, I told him and he was horrified. Yeah, we don't pay him enough. Yeah. So everybody guess what they think the best cost that can be around to a vest gate. Just throwing gate around willy-nilly. How do we want to set this up guys? Do? You wanna talk about what kind of episode this is? I mean, it's just, uh, because we don't have Seth, we didn't wanna go further into sketches,
Starting point is 00:05:31 so this is like filler and just like trash episode? Like a bag of trash episode. Give him the hard sell. Anyway, be sure to listen to the whole fucking thing. We got a bunch of Q&As. This is what we like to call an idling while Seth attends a bar mititzvah in Texas kind of an episode.
Starting point is 00:05:48 Yeah. I'm only gonna do half of it in my pod voice though. The rest of it's gonna be like this. The thing that takes me off the most fellas is the number of Bar Mitzvah invites I turn down in order to be here. Oh my God. And then Seth just turns right around and just fucks us.
Starting point is 00:06:06 You know what I mean? What a turbo white that guy is. I know. We thought he was the most turbo white. Turns out he's really just... The most turbot. Yeah. He did, so he did one solid before he got on a plane, which was that he texted his drinking buddy, Paul Rudd.
Starting point is 00:06:18 I say drinking buddy because they did the day drinking, which was delightful. Oh, my God. Oh, by the way, I finally saw that, and it is excellent. You guys were not wrong. It's a very good episode. So good. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:06:29 So go check that out on YouTube, everybody. So this was again in regards to everyone's a critic and to we knew we had given him the painting and where is it and that was the question. Hey guys, it's Paul. I have an update for you about the painting. I do have it. Oh, wow. You were kind enough to give it to me, I guess as a remembrance of our time together making the digital short. I loved it. I treasured it. I took it back to my house and realized I don't want this
Starting point is 00:07:00 hanging on any wall. So I have it in a closet. It is a disturbing painting. I Could describe it, but that does take some of the mystery away Because it is an actual painting. Let's just say Andy's nude from the waist down as we know and He has hot dogs for fingers and that's part of it know, and he has hot dogs for fingers. And that's part of it. And I realized, out of context, you hang that on the wall, you have to describe why you have that on your wall. And that's not a good thing. Anyway, there you go. If you want it back, just text me.
Starting point is 00:07:44 I have a couple of comments on that. One, I would like Paul to at least put it up on his wall in the closet that it's in. Yeah, it doesn't have to be on the floor of the closet. Yeah, why not in the back of the closet? Just to preserve it a little better, yeah. You know, it can be a nice surprise when you get to- Just right behind all the jackets.
Starting point is 00:08:00 So when you go for a jacket- So when you get to laundry day, you're like, oh God! He said you had a couple of comments here. Yeah, so when you get to laundry day, you're like, oh, God! He said you had a couple of comments, Jerm. Yeah, what's your second? We're leaving a room. I can't even remember. I can't remember the second one. That's how fast.
Starting point is 00:08:14 I'm goldfish over here. That's how quickly they go, guys. We just saw one. It's rare to see a thought forget in real time. You'd be the worst lawyer. I'm a, I'm a. First of all, my client. Second, secondly.
Starting point is 00:08:25 My client. Oh- My client is- Oh. My client, Jerry? This isn't my real voice. Oh, but seriously, this is a good court case. You're a good judge. In all seriousness, can we let him off the hook? He's a good guy.
Starting point is 00:08:40 I'll remember it. Mid-show, I think. This is it. We are mid-show. We have no Seth. We are floundering. Oh, wow. This is gonna be a 15-minute-er. Just one long ramble.
Starting point is 00:08:49 Wait, without Seth giving us structure... Look, we had been debating doing a podcast for a long time, and we were like, but we can't do it. And then Seth was like, I'll do it with you. And we were like, oh, then that would be something, because then there'd be a person who would make it be a thing. That's right. That is what talked us into a person who would make it be a thing. That's right.
Starting point is 00:09:06 That is what talked us into it. That would keep it on track and moving forward. And now look at him. He's probably dancing the horror right now while we're floundering. Now we're all playing like a game of chicken of who's going to take the lead. Jeff, throw something in there so that when we need something,
Starting point is 00:09:23 it's there. Give us things to comment on, Jeff. Every time we're starting one, have the next one there. So when we're gasping for air, there's a breath, you know what I mean? Hey dudes, it's Seth. I'm currently at the airport and just wanted to, you know, check in, hear how the pod is going without me. and I guess maybe a little curious as to whether it's better without me and if our listeners are gonna sort of say I'm a fourth wheel and I should get out of the way but then you know when you think
Starting point is 00:09:56 about cars fourth wheel is almost essential to the engineering as far as you don't want to be one of those weird ones making it safe on the roads. And I also can tell this is coming off as desperate and needy, and so I just wouldn't even play this. I think it's a huge mistake to play this. But I also think it's a huge mistake to do without me, and I cannot believe you guys did this on the day that I'm at the airport and fucking spinning out right now. I'm so mad.
Starting point is 00:10:25 And I agree with Akiva. Space Olympics is a fucking pile of shit. Aw, man! After all these years? He finally said it. That's just the tag now. Oh. Well, thanks, caller, for weighing in.
Starting point is 00:10:38 One of the Quaid armies. It was wild that he, like, voiced his concern that we were gonna be better without him right as we were spiraling about having no clue how to do it without him. It shows you that we're actually the perfect team. Yeah, what a great metaphor. You know, we are a car, and thanks so much
Starting point is 00:10:58 for keeping us on the tracks, Seth. Let's see what happens next. All right, so Jeff is one of the producers over here, and he's gonna be just feeding us stuff. We are a car? The lonely auto. What is this full on? I just got up from a nap, to be fair.
Starting point is 00:11:12 So, yeah. Ah, this is post-nap yorm. Yeah, this is, yeah. Snuggly sleepy guy. There's so many things about me that you're gonna find out this episode. Okay, so Jeff, one of the producers, is gonna be just feeding us things
Starting point is 00:11:25 and it's gonna be nice and clunky in the chat. Here we go. Questions we got a lot of. Several people have mentioned the similarity to White Lotus opening theme in the Everybody's a Critic that are, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo, whoo. Oh, it's a little bit of the, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. So, did they rip us off?
Starting point is 00:11:41 It is kinda similar. Oh, man, yeah. I bet Mike White ripped us off. Well, I heard, you know, there's a big falling out between Mike White and the guy who does the music. That's probably what it was about. Mike's like, you can't do that. You're just ripping off to everyone with the crick music. You took it a different way.
Starting point is 00:11:56 I was gonna say, Mike, call Keev and Yoram. They're readily available to fill in if you guys are going with that guy next to you. I will definitely do that. Season five, are we on season four or five? If it was season four and like opening credits hit and it was just you guys going, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh. You're like, people didn't even watch like the first episode.
Starting point is 00:12:15 You're like, ah, for some reason this season seems worse. This is the next one, ready? Yes. People have let us know that you can say jizz after 9 p.m. in the UK. Oh, even earlier. Does that mean multiple people said 9 p.m. is the jizz starting cut off? That's the jizz starting cut off. Wow. I told you guys they're not tripping there. I know, but is that official? Why would this is written like multiple people weighed in to be like 9 p.m. I think it's not like at nine, the one word you can now say is jizz.
Starting point is 00:12:45 I think it's like all dirty stuff. Yeah, yeah, like all, it turns into HBO on their broadcast TV. Yeah. You know, the way I think about Britain though, too, like it's very, it's, I like to think that it's actually not about TV, it's about life. And at 9 o'clock, they can all say it. But before that, they would never dare because it would be too impolite. No, because that's too close to tea time
Starting point is 00:13:10 Interesting. It's jizz time at night. Yeah, you know, it's an interesting thing about foggy Lenin town Everyone's like oh spot a tea, you know England. Yeah, they really they really do drink a ton of tea They do it's not like a nasty thing that people say about it, you know, it's like actually very very quaint and nice So both you guys spent extended time there. What is the tea that's in the mid-morning, like the 11 a.m. one called? Do you guys know? There's like a really cute name for the 11 a.m. tea. Is Tetley's one of them? Am I mispronouncing it? Well I get them confused with you know what Hobbits do. Right, but they probably do it too. What do they call it? There's 11sies second breakfast. That's it. I just I literally couldn't remember it. It seems like I should have since I said the word 11, but that's it. too. What do they call it? There's Elevenzy's second breakfast. Elevenzy's, that's it. I just, I literally couldn't remember it.
Starting point is 00:13:45 It seems like I should have since I said the word 11, but that's it. I don't think they have second breakfast. Was that spot on? Support comes from cremo. You know, guys, I've been hitting the gym as some of you may know, because I'm trying to look like Jeremy Allen White
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Starting point is 00:16:14 homechef.com slash island. That's homechef.com slash island for 50% off your first box and free dessert for life. homechef.com slash island must be an active subscriber to receive free dessert. All right. So a couple of people mentioned going to meet us at shows where they went to the place where they could fuck us. And then they sent photos. So we got a photo from Claire that is showing right there. So that's us. Do people know, let's reiterate if people don't know. We went over how, when we were on stage at the concert, I forget why I came up, over and over the refrain
Starting point is 00:16:50 of if anybody wants to fuck me, I'll be chilling at the office depot parking lot on Lamar and Fifth, bad bitches only, thank you, God bless. God bless, I forgot how we did that, God bless. That was in wherever Claire is from. And then we got another person, Melissa sent us a shirt that we talked about how we always had one of our roadies meet whoever was there with a kind of fill in the blank shirt we made that says, I came to party with the lonely Island on and then a Sharpie.
Starting point is 00:17:19 This looks like maybe my handwriting. It really does look like your handwriting. June 21st at the Duane Reade in NYC. So it's like an official Mad Libs shirt that we had that we would fill out every night. That's a fun one. It's very good. And then here is a picture as a bonus of Seth, who I forgot, did he do a set of comedy when we played Pier 17 in New York, or did he just come out and intro us? I don't know. I think he might have just
Starting point is 00:17:45 introduced us and someone else did a set. Yeah. No way. No way. I think that might be true. I think maybe Connor O'Malley did this one. It was Connor. Oh, really?
Starting point is 00:17:52 I bet it was super right down the middle too. Yeah, that's him. We probably didn't want him to do it because he was so turbid white. We were just like, get out of here. You're ruining the vibe, Seth. Oh, I see. We would always have comedians we like open for us. And then if somebody else was around,
Starting point is 00:18:07 we'd have them come intro us, like, Tim Robinson intro'd us in Detroit, that sort of thing. But Tim Meadows opened. Opened. We had such rad openers. We had the two best Detroit Tims. Yes. And Danny Brown, also the fucking triad of awesome Detroit dudes. Yeah, Danny Brown came out and did Lazy Sunday. That was nuts.
Starting point is 00:18:26 Jeff, Jeff, you gotta have the next one just sitting there. So when we're going, I can just rail right into it. Jeff, you're exposing us and ruining our fucking careers, dude. And if it's gonna be an audio one, just put audio one next, and then I'll throw to that. I have a real, I have an actual question. Sometimes when we're getting these voice notes and sometimes when I went online
Starting point is 00:18:47 and looked at comments, there's people on YouTube going, where do you send a voice note? How do you get a voice note in? And I'm like, I have no clue where these are coming from. Jeff, will you tell us where do the voice notes come from? If somebody wants to send us a voice question. There's a link in the Instagram bio. Ah, there's a link in the Instagram bio for people who want to send it. You can just leave your voice in there, Jeff. We don't have to edit you out. It's fine.
Starting point is 00:19:10 All right, this is from Ali. Hi guys, listening to the newest episode on the classic and certainly criterion collection short Jizz in My Pants and thought the intro for today's episode sounded a lot like Kristen Wigg singing. I guess I have two questions. One, am I right? Did I totally nail that? Two, where did you get those intros from?
Starting point is 00:19:28 Who, what, when, where? Longtime listener, first time emailer. Thanks for making my commute more fun. So I'll answer two first, and then you can talk about the Wiig one. Uh, this guy, Greg Chun, who we've known for years and is a musician and is always our first call when we have something that is actually musical that we need to do real.
Starting point is 00:19:49 He's just very good at picking up the phone, and he's very talented. A little bit of trivia on him, if you watch Squid Game, but you do it dubbed, he's the voice of the main dude in Squid Game for American audiences, because he also does a lot of VO. So when there's little things like this, he's always the first person
Starting point is 00:20:06 I'm, any of us are texting. He did all the music for the Michael Bolton Valentine's Day special. He did when Andy hosted the Emmys, he did the opening, uh, like musical kind of song. He did the song we did for the Oscars that ended up not getting made. Oh yeah. That's on our YouTube channel. Um, I bet you his voice is even on there. And so, yeah, so we love this guy. And so every once a month, he'll just text us like five new ones that are random. And then the wig one, she texted it to your Machapella
Starting point is 00:20:34 and I'm not sure why. I just asked her what her idea for a theme song would be because she was saying that she would want to do one. And then she sent that in. And then we didn't bother to re-record her because we were like, that was great. And honestly, it wasn't even us. She just did it. And then Greg Chun just made it musical and surprised all of us, actually. So that's how great it was.
Starting point is 00:20:54 All right, was there something else? No, that was those... You were succinct and wonderful, and Greg's the homie. We're gonna burn through these. Also something that everyone at home couldn't see while you were doing that, handsome. Oh. Oh, wow.
Starting point is 00:21:08 Not to step on your arms in the monitor. I would confuse your arms. Yeah, that's gonna mess it up. Shots holstered. Which one is Andrew? Shots holstered, compliment deployed. All right, we have an audio message, let's rock it. Hi, my name's Edie, I'm from Baltimore,
Starting point is 00:21:22 and my favorite Lonely Island skit is Ross Trunk because my dad is bald. And my question is, why won't my parents let me say Sushi Glory while at school? Bye! Oh man. I was gonna feel bad for saying that this vest fucks and that jizz should be something that people... But then at the end of that, I was like, I guess it's fine. That kid is up on game. It's up to every parent how they want to raise their child. And, you know, at least they're telling her
Starting point is 00:21:52 that these are jokes for home and don't bring it to the school. We don't know how old that person was. You know what I mean? No, I'm just going off what she said, that she can't say that she's not allowed to talk about sushi goreho at school, so. Oh, you think that that person might be in college?
Starting point is 00:22:04 Like a really uptight medical school. Wait, what was that kid's name? Yeah. Edie. Oh, I thought it was Edie. That was Edie Falco guys. Edie Amin sounded really kind of pleasant. Yep.
Starting point is 00:22:20 It was Forest. It was a Forest Whitaker in character as Edie Amin. Edie, thank you for the wonderful note. Do you remember the scene in the Idi Amin movie that I forget the title of where James McAvoy comes in as his doctor and he's just saying he has such extreme stomach pain and then he takes like a baseball bat and holds it against Idi Amin's stomach from behind like doing the Heimlich maneuver. You know I do because we watched it together.
Starting point is 00:22:41 Until he just farts for like 45 second fart. It might be the longest fart in movie history, right? And it's like a lot. Last King of Scotland, yeah. Last King of Scotland, Kevin reminds me of the title. It's such a serious, like, tense movie, and then there's just a 45 second fart. Can I say the funniest part of it, though,
Starting point is 00:22:59 was after that, because then they both fall out laughing, like, oh, oh, oh, oh. But then you're like, you're in the same room. You're like, you're still smelling the fart. Yeah, he doesn't talk about what it smelled like, but there's so much relief between them both. Do you think it's the longest, like, on-camera fart ever recorded? Like, in something that's narrative?
Starting point is 00:23:18 It might be in, like, a studio movie, like, a real movie. In a movie, yeah. Like, an Oscar-y kind of movie, for sure. Yeah, that might be the longest fart. What about Blazing Saddles? That's the most tonnage, but probably not length. Yeah, I don't know that like Dumb and Dumber
Starting point is 00:23:32 or Blazing Saddles, I don't know that they have a single fart that goes that long. Maybe Swiss Army Man would top it, potentially? Oh yeah. That's interesting. Swiss Army Man's got some really good ones. But that's indie, those are indie farts. A-24, yeah, you start including A-24, you're gonna have... The farts are gonna go crazy.
Starting point is 00:23:50 We have to discern now? Yeah. Your next movie won Best Picture. We're talking majors, just from the studios. Oh my God. They don't have the same checks and balances at A-24. They can just kind of like let it go. Right.
Starting point is 00:24:03 You guys, when the cat's away, the fart mice will play. Am I right? The mice will drive the three-wheeled car. The mice will drive the three-wheeled car right into convos about screen farts. All right. This next one is from Nick and he grew up in foggy London town. I don't have a good British accent. So you know, one of you-
Starting point is 00:24:20 No, we try. We try. One of you Anglophiles have to do it. No, no, you try. Let's do it. Put that top hat on. Hey guys, growing up in foggy London town, we didn't get SNL on TV. But I've been a fan of the Lonely Island ever since I stumbled across the shorts on YouTube as a teenager. I remember listening to the Incredibout album at the original HMV on Oxford Street, like it was Holy scripture. What did HMV stand for again?
Starting point is 00:24:46 I know that's like a- Her majesty's voice, I believe. Really? It's like a best buy kind of thing. I was fucking quick on the draw on that one. Ping pong. I would never even heard of it. So that's Yoram wins.
Starting point is 00:24:55 It's like a Virgin Megastore. Well, I guess they would have Virgin cause that's what your brand's from. That's like their whole thing. Given Yorma and Andy were doing sexy British accents in the Jizz in My Pants, were they imagining pants in the Jizzo My Pants, were they imagining pants in the UK sense, i.e. underwear, or in the US sense, i.e. trousers?
Starting point is 00:25:12 Trousers. That's a really good point. He found a fucking flaw in the ointment. Well, we've also settled that you guys were doing German accents from somebody who learned in Germany from a British teacher. I mean, it makes more sense actually in the Brit way because that's where it would go. That is actually true.
Starting point is 00:25:30 Yeah. I mean, this is the whole Fanny versus Fanny situation. Or was it a beautiful transatlantic double entendre that covered both? If so, righteous kill. I love all four of you so much. It gets a bit lonely working from home every day, but every Tuesday I get to feel like I'm taking the piss with some old mates.
Starting point is 00:25:50 What a fucking dream that people are now sending messages with righteous kill in it. Yeah, so many dreams. Your dream is alive. We brought it back. I guess it never dies with us. So many dreams realized on this pod. The Quaid army is widening out the dream. First of all, thank you for such astute observations, Nick,
Starting point is 00:26:11 and questions. Yeah, let's just assume that we're super smart, I would say. No, it was trousers. It was trousers. It was. We would have said in my underpants. That's also because just you generally
Starting point is 00:26:22 would say like, I pissed my pants. You don't go, oh, I pissed my underpants. Although I guess some people. P would say like, I pissed my pants. You don't go, I pissed my underpants. Although I guess some people. Pants just is the clean single syllable that you need. Everything else is multi-syllabic. Yeah. That would be weird to me. Jizz and my trousers would probably not work as well.
Starting point is 00:26:35 In my underpants. Jizz in my undies. You're actually solid. Jizz in my tighty whiteys. Jizz in my boxers. You could have said jeans, you know. Jizz in, well we have Punch You in the Jeans, that was overlap. We didn't want to cannibalize ourselves on the same album.
Starting point is 00:26:50 Dodge the bullet. Right, that'd be embarrassing. What if it used to be jeans and then we changed it? It was actually originally jeans, but then we wrote Punch You in the Jeans and we were like, we can't cannibalize ourselves. Oh yeah, come on, that'd be embarrassing. We pivoted to pants and there is his story. All right. That was great. All right. We got an audio message next. Roll it. Roll it.
Starting point is 00:27:13 Hi, I'm calling from Canada. First, I have a confession. So I had forgotten the origin of the whole Quaid thing. And when we started referring to ourselves as the Quaid Army, I for some reason thought that it was a reference to like Randy Quaid, Dennis Quaid. We're all a bunch of Quaids. And I'm not not disappointed that's not the reference. Anyway, here's my question. I thoroughly enjoy when everyone does their Lorne Michaels impersonations. And my question is, is there ever a time when he like really slips into his Canadian accent, like when he's mad or when he's drunk
Starting point is 00:27:48 or when he's feeling maybe a bit silly? Thanks so much, love you guys. Thanks for that, love you. I think Seth would know this better than us, but for me, my guess would be when he's around his old buddies from Canada. The same way like anyone, when they go back to their hometown,
Starting point is 00:28:05 that regional thing comes back more. That would be my guess. And I would say the most Canadian thing that was mentioned about him and pointed out was that I believe he has a little lapel pin that he wears occasionally, which is this tiny little flower. And it's like some sort of distinction
Starting point is 00:28:23 from the Canadian government, right? Am I making this up? I feel like this is a thing. And it was when we were traveling to Canada with him that I noticed that he was wearing it and someone pointed out what it was for. In my mind, it was like a diplomatic pin that like allowed him to get into customs without going through customs or something like that.
Starting point is 00:28:41 I don't think that's true. I like him having Canada pride, which he certainly does. Yeah. I haven't the foggiest about that, Jorm, but. Oh, good. I hope I made it up entirely. No, I feel like maybe you're rousing from your nap a little bit here
Starting point is 00:28:54 and things are starting to flood back in. Starting to flood the zone. Yeah. Yeah, he's remembering just a lapel pin. Kevin says, I think it is an order of Canada pin. Ah. Fuck yeah, I was right. Oh man, I can't.
Starting point is 00:29:06 You know what? Let me be the first person to congratulate Lauren. An Order of Canada pin. Oh yeah, look at that. It's got a little maple leaf in the middle. Oh, it does, okay, yeah. Well, there you go. It's a fun little factoid.
Starting point is 00:29:19 Yeah, I love it. Next question. All right, this is from Anna Orana. Hi, Lonely Island's Seth Meyers. I am a third grade teacher and I like to expose my children to cool pop culture things. What sketch or digital short would each of you pick to be in your comedy for kids class?
Starting point is 00:29:38 That's kind of like in quotes and it's with K's comedy for kids class. What are your own kids' favorite songs or sketches? Do they know you had a dope past? Anyways, I hope you read this on air to my fellow Quades. Love you guys. I love having it on the record that we have a dope past. I wonder if they know that their teacher's a Quade.
Starting point is 00:29:58 I'm gonna have to answer to the board. Wait, what are your guys, I actually wanna know. And I think that we should not pick things from SNL potentially on this answer, but that's my own opinion. From my kids, they don't give it up. They're just like classic kids who won't give it up for my stuff in general. Your kids, they won't give it up for how dope you are. But what do they like?
Starting point is 00:30:21 One of my daughters likes Sushi Glorial. I know that. I guess it felt more fresh. When I play the old things, they kind of go, uh-huh. My kids are a little young. There's very few things I've ever played of our stuff because there's so much cursing. So they've listened to YOLO because that has no cursing. And that's not true.
Starting point is 00:30:37 My four-year-old was recently saying lines from something new we were working on and it was filled with cursing. And I realized I was a bad parent. My sketch that I would say, this was just the first thing that popped in my head, was a Monty Python sketch that is the coal miner sketch where a son comes home and says that he wants to be a coal miner to a family of actors. The actors are all playing it as if the life of an actor
Starting point is 00:31:05 is super hard and, like, very, very blue collar and, like, you're really doing the work. He's had a hard day, dear. His new play opens at National Theatre tomorrow. Oh, that's good. Good? Good? What do you know about it? What do you know about getting up at 5 o'clock in the morning
Starting point is 00:31:22 to fly to Paris, back at the old Vic for drinks at 12, sweating the day through press interviews, television interviews, then getting back here at 10 to wrestle the problem of an homosexual nymphomaniac drug addict involved in the ritual murder of a well-known Scottish footballer? That's a full working day, lad. And don't you forget it! And the son is like, but I want to be a coal miner, daddy. And he's like, why? What's wrong?
Starting point is 00:31:44 And he's like, I don't want to go to Galalunchians. What's wrong with Galalunchians? And I fucking always loved it. And I actually ripped it off on a sketch called Math Wizards Versus History Buffs. It was a Matthew Fox episode and wrote a sketch that was just a complete ripoff of that sketch, because I always loved it.
Starting point is 00:32:02 Keev, what's yours? Do you think you wrote it for Matthew Fox because he has the word math in his name? Oh. Oh. That's fascinating, maybe. You're so busted. About that part of it, not the part where he admitted to ripping off. No, not the ripoff part.
Starting point is 00:32:19 It was the math in math. Yeah, you got it. Try living that one down. You took it as which sketch or digital short would you pick just so it could be anything at that point? than Matt Hughes. Yep, you got him. Try living that one down. You took it as which sketch or digital short would you pick just so it could be anything at that point. Yeah, I think it was like required. I was gonna say that in general,
Starting point is 00:32:32 Throw It On The Ground seems to be the one kids like. Yeah, of ours for sure. Oh, we're picking our own shit? I don't know. For like, require the comedy. What else do we have to gauge? I mean, like when we were kids, which ones we liked? When we were doing sound mix and color
Starting point is 00:32:46 for the last season, I think you should leave. Uh, they kept sending it, and then I'd watch it just to kind of double-check that I didn't catch something. And I'd say, I have homework, because I was with the kids, and I'd be like, it's like six o'clock, and they need the notes by nine. And I go, guys, I have homework. I have to watch this. And one time, one of my daughters decided to sit there,
Starting point is 00:33:03 and she sat down and started watching was like, this is your homework. And she's too young for it and loves it and does get it. And now it like kind of talks a little like Tim, which I'm sure has happened to a lot of people around the world who like, I think you should leave where his unique speech patterns kind of infect your brain. And she wanted to watch more and has now watched every sketch, except for there's a few I still skip. Yeah. But she basically can quote a bunch of them and does.
Starting point is 00:33:32 Um, I don't know if we really answered, but here we go. Thanks for calling in, Anna or Anna. Okay, skipping. And when Annie doesn't get to answer, what? Oh, did you have some, Andy? Uh, everything is awesome. No brainer. Great. That sketch from the movie. Redefined comedy.
Starting point is 00:33:50 Support for the Lonely Island and Seth Meyers podcast comes from Airbnb. Recently, I took a trip to Los Angeles, California. And I stayed at Airbnb for five days. It was in the valley. I'm not going to tell you where, because then you might track my movements. It was great. It was right across the street from a park. It was a really beautiful unit and you know what it made me think? It made me think, man,
Starting point is 00:34:11 I'm blowing it. I have a lovely place that I could be doing the same thing with. I would love to share it with the world. It's a great way for people to have lovely experiences in and what am I doing? I'm just blowing it. Because it feels like it's more of a vacation in an Airbnb. It's not a hotel. You don't have to feel like you're just visiting a city. You're living in a city. And anyway, I felt like I was really throwing money
Starting point is 00:34:38 in the garbage and I was a fool. Your home could be worth more than you think. And you can find out how much at Airbnb.com Slash host that's Airbnb.com slash host tell them the lonely island saying Support comes from Shopify Starting a business can be hard. I got another great billion dollar idea guys This one is stress balls that would have pictures of your enemies'
Starting point is 00:35:06 faces on them so that you could relieve stress and it's kind of like a voodoo thing where you could you know smash people. I don't know don't take these ideas you guys I'll probably do them. And with Shopify starting that great business idea of mine can be so easy. There are so many things to do and check off your list and Shopify makes all of those super simple. It simplifies everything from making your website to building out your online store. Shopify even makes it easy to set up that online store. Shopify is the commerce platform behind millions of businesses around the world like Aviator Nation, Allbirds, and brands that are just getting started like mine. There's hundreds of easy to use templates that Shopify uses to help build your beautiful
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Starting point is 00:36:44 Shopify.com slash Lonely island for a third time. Peace out. Okay. Next up, we have an audio one. Go ahead. Hey guys, my name's Brandon and I'm from British Columbia, Canada. I live about 40 minutes away from where you guys shot Hot Rod. And I was in high school when you guys were on the show. So I can definitely confirm that it was an golden era. Our family builds and collects movie cars and we actually own the original screen used mirth mobile from the first Wayne's World and I'm right in the middle of building a replica of Rod's
Starting point is 00:37:18 bike from Hot Rod, the Tomos A35. My question is, do you have anything from Hot Rod or from the digital shorts, any props or costumes that you just hold on to or something that was important that you just felt like you needed to take home and maybe display? I love props. One of my favorite things. Love the podcast. I'm a card carrying Quaid Army member and your sense of humor really shaped my sense of humor. So thank you for that. Love you podcast. I'm a card carrying quaid army member and your sense of humor really shaped my sense of humor So thank you for that. Love you guys Wow, that got super real and awesome like that's fucking cool as shit the original waynesville cars, right? I know I was immediately very jealous. That's so flattering that you would recreate rods a
Starting point is 00:38:02 Sweet scooter. It's a fun thing to ride, too. I know that you're not talking about a real one, but I really... No, he is. He's gonna... No, he is. He's rebuilding fucking real. He's just rebuilding one. He's just having to find the parts. Yeah, he's making a little, like, miniature Lego-sized one, right? I don't think so. I think he's making a real one. I'm not backing off this.
Starting point is 00:38:18 He's just... Okay, got it. Copy. What was the... Wait, what did he just ask at the end? Do we have any movie props? I have one of the full rod jumpsuit and cape outfits in my closet. Oh, I didn't know that. Why don't you wear it to brunch and stuff? That's a good question, you remember.
Starting point is 00:38:35 He's put on a couple pounds. I mean, that was the most comfortable thing I've ever worn in anything. So I think I could probably still... That's the reason he doesn't wear it to brunch is because he's put on a couple pounds? Yeah, not because I don't want to dress up as a character in a movie I played.
Starting point is 00:38:51 I also have a... This is not our proper comedy stuff, but I do have one of the outfits from Palm Springs too, which is another movie where I wear the exact same thing the whole time. Right, the same outfit every day. I have one of the Rod capes just folded, like, in a container somewhere in my closet. Oh, that's killer. I have one of the other Rod capes just folded in a container somewhere in my closet. That's killer.
Starting point is 00:39:07 I have Tim Meadows gave me, because he knew I was such a huge fan of the Ladies Man, I have one of the candles that was on the Ladies Man's desk. That's fun. Yeah. But for the amount of things we did, I pretty much have nothing. Yeah, no, correct. Same here. Well, it's weird, because when a movie wraps, it all belongs to the studio, and if they need it for additional photography, it all gets packed away very meticulously. It's not a free-for-all.
Starting point is 00:39:31 Same with the costumes. And then at some point, you talk to people who are like, oh yeah, I bought that at an auction, or it got thrown away in a dumpster. And you're like, oh, I wish somebody would call me a year later when they're like, hey, we're getting rid of all this stuff. Yeah, like I definitely wished we owned the head, the DJ head for Owen's character in Popstar. Oh yeah, that was crazy expensive too. I wish that was in our office and it's not. But now it's at the Smithsonian. What are you gonna do? For future generations to enjoy.
Starting point is 00:40:00 Yeah. You guys, that segment was brought to you by Black Moon. Who got the probs? Thanks so much. Who got the props? Well, we know it's Buckshot and... Five-foot Evil Dee and Buckshot. Oh, yeah, three guys got the props.
Starting point is 00:40:12 Got the props. That's who got the props. Just like us three guys. Those guys were a real three-wheeled car, too. Amazing that they kept it on the tracks. Yeah. For those who don't know, it was a song from 1993. I guess you can just Google it.
Starting point is 00:40:23 Yeah, Black Moon was a band, guys. Oh, yeah. All right, I guess we have another audio one. Kick it was a song from 1993. I guess you can just Google it. Yeah. Black Moon was a band, guys. Oh, yeah. All right. I guess we have another audio one. Kick it. Hey there, guys. I'm Bentley. First time listener, long time caller. And I had a quick question for you. Has there ever been a time where, quote unquote,
Starting point is 00:40:39 real rappers have reached out to y'all to help polish up a verse or add a couple extra lines or y'all just straight up helped ghost write a song by a real rapper. There's been several times throughout your musical career that you have absolutely dope lines that if put in a more serious context would be phenomenal. know, phenomenal, just be amazing lines. And I think it would be really interesting if other legitimate rappers had reached out to y'all and incorporated your talents and your skills. So thank you for your time. Love the podcast. And hope you all have a great day.
Starting point is 00:41:20 Very, very flattering. Very nice. The answer is a resounding no. Yeah, like a 1000% no. No, no real rapper. I think that's in the title though. Like if you're a real rapper, I don't think you're going to us to punch up you. I mean, we're open to it, obviously, if somebody wants to have their stuff be worse. But the closest we ever got was while we were making our third album. Who reached? It was Dan the Automator reached out, right? They were making the new Deltron. Oh, yeah. Yeah, the Deltron 3030. But we did like a... It was still a very goofy, stupid thing. It was a comedy sketch. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:41:54 Like a skit. But that's the most like legitimate thing we've ever been on, right? But we were pretty fucking psyched to be on it, because that was, you know, Deltron was like a big thing for us in high school. And Dan the Automator, because that was, you know, Deltron was like a big thing for us in high school. And Dan the Automator, everything that those guys, him and Prince Paul did, and just Dan in general, was like stuff that we were very psyched on, so.
Starting point is 00:42:12 Were we disappointed not to be included on Handsome Boy Modeling School's white people? Sure, but we hadn't made a name for ourselves yet, so it was out of the question. If there's a white people too, would we like the call? Yeah, man, we'd like the call. Big time. Dan, this is going out to you.
Starting point is 00:42:28 I will say this, there have been real rappers that I have heard that I thought were doing a joke and then realized they were real rappers after the fact. I was like, oh, okay. Like for a second I was like, that was pretty funny. Like that's a good comedy rap person that came out. I'm not gonna name names, but yeah. And then found out that they were taking it real serious. Kendrick.
Starting point is 00:42:50 Kendrick, yep. Yeah, it was Kendrick. I thought the damn album was just full of great jokes and I was laughing all the time. And I thought, oh my God, we've got a competition. And then someone said, no. People are taking this real legit. It's a hot X.
Starting point is 00:43:05 Yoram just found that funny. We were like, I don't know, man. Seems like he's pretty bad at it. Yoram, kick your most serious rhyme. Okay, ready? Yeah, obviously. Hey, yo, you like burritos? Yo, we all like burritos,
Starting point is 00:43:21 but here's a little something that you might not know about burritos. About burritos. She can get expensive when you buy him in bulk, so grab a pen and a pad so you don't go broke. Hit a Baja fresh up with your bros. Should be showing us to put vegetarian dos manos. Them shits are super large for only $6.25, so you can have one half now and then reheat the other half later. Later!
Starting point is 00:43:43 Later! Yeah! Wow. I later. Later, yeah. I still remember it, guys. That's a good verse. That's just lessons for the kids. It was from a song called For the Children. It was an advice song that was unhelpful. I always loved that verse.
Starting point is 00:43:57 Later. That was a real answer. By the way, that was back in the day, because Ados Manos was only $6.25. Who knows what they called it? They were huge, two hands! Weighing on the comments! Weighing on the comments how much a Dos Monos cost? If Baja Fresh is even still in business, tell us what a Dos Monos cost!
Starting point is 00:44:14 Hey, Quaid Army, let's hear from you. We got a caller on the line, go ahead. No, we don't have that capability, Q. Caller, go ahead. Hey guys, hope you're good. I love the pods. My question is obviously we have loads of great SNL movies over the years. What are the sketches, like they don't have to be your own, that you would love to make into a movie? PS, I'm in London at the minute and I'm also unemployed. So I was looking at jobs today and I saw that there's actually a Cold Stone Creamery
Starting point is 00:44:45 in London, which I didn't know. And I thought like, oh, I'll make the joke. I'm toiling part-time at Cold Stone Creamery. And I applied, it's actually a full-time position. So I'd be toiling full-time at the Cold Stone Creamery. All right. Thanks guys. Have a good one. Yeah. You cannot toil full-time. That guy had a real train spotting vibe going on. Before we respond to that at all, I looked it up and Yoram, guess how much a Dos Manos Burrito cost at Baja Fresh now? According to the Google thing.
Starting point is 00:45:13 I'm going to say 950. You buffoon. Keev, what's your guess? I saw it already. He held it up to his camera. Oh shit. It's over $21. No, no it isn guess? I saw it already. He held it up to his camera. Oh, shit. It's over $21. No, no, no.
Starting point is 00:45:28 Hold on. Yes. That's what you. No way. What? That's what Google AI said. Do they even still do it, though? Because I just want to.
Starting point is 00:45:36 Was it guessing what it would be with inflation? On their website. Oh, like what it would be, 6.25 in today's currency. Wow. Inflation's a fucking. I don't see it on here, though. I don't even know if they make it anymore. I'm on their official website. Right. Weighing on the comments, what do you think of those Monashute personalities?
Starting point is 00:45:51 Guys, without Seth here, we can talk about things like there used to be Baja Freshes all over Los Angeles, and now I don't know where even any of them are. Oh, we got to answer the question though, guys. Mine would be, I would love to see a Falconer movie, but I'm obviously a big Will Forte head. I mean, the one we've always talked about was Laser Cats. Yes. You do like the high end meets low end, whatever it is. Would love to do a Laser Cats movie, yeah.
Starting point is 00:46:14 Andy, do you have one that you'd like to see turned into a film? Or you only like original stuff, so you refuse to answer the question. I'm anti-IP. You don't like just general intellectual property. Do sketches count as IP? I think so. Yeah, they do.
Starting point is 00:46:32 You know what? I guess a recurring sketch could be considered IP. Yeah. Like it sure as hell was IP when Wayne's World movie was coming out. I was like, oh fuck. I always enjoyed every one of them. Oh my God, so much.
Starting point is 00:46:43 Because they're at least silly and fun, and they are a genuine effort, even if they don't quite... Some of them don't hold up as well as others. No, they're really funny people and making things full of jokes. I wish we still lived in a world where, again, major studios, no offense to the longer farting ones
Starting point is 00:47:01 that can, because they don't have any... They can do anything they want. But like, the ones where there are rules, putting real money, how fun would it be, you know, this summer, be seeing some SNL, I don't even want to guess what they would be, but just those kind of movies that are now extinct. I would love to see them.
Starting point is 00:47:17 Right, like almost like a big swing, like really going for a joke movie. Like, I don't know what exists like that. Or that could be coming out maybe even in August. good it's oh god if someone could bring those back I'd pat that guy on the back you know who I love is that Liam Neeson guy I'd buy that guy a beer I'd say hey thanks for bringing back comedy you know what I mean that guy I'd buy that guy a beer yeah but it won't happen yeah if you just saw that like at a hotel bar. Right, like movies like Airplane, Naked Gun, like why aren't people making those anymore?
Starting point is 00:47:48 I keep in mind that maybe, maybe he's semi gluten intolerant and actually can't drink very many beers without starting to feel a little sick. So maybe I'd give him a voucher for one later or something rather than like trying to have it right there. Or like what kind of thing could he drink do you think? Like if he was over his, like he couldn't do his glu thing. It's more important that he gets credits for room service later or something.
Starting point is 00:48:09 So it's more like putting... Just putting in cash towards the overall bill. If someone were to do that to bring back laugh-a-minute comedy with a studio picture this summer, I would maybe bring that guy a burrito. I'd Venmo 15 bucks to whatever hotel he was staying at to go against the overall charges at the end of the stay. Right, so you get, like, some chicken fingers at, like, 2 a.m.
Starting point is 00:48:29 Yeah. Again, gluten-free. So, put that in the mix when you get it right. Shit, so, like, a green salad? This is the worst, Keev. Listen, listen. Hey to all our younger listeners, it'll come for you, don't you worry. Enjoy it now.
Starting point is 00:48:42 Enjoy it while it lasts. Enjoy it. All right, this one comes from Ash. Since you funny fellas covered the IncrediBad album, I've always been curious as to whose hand is whose on the album cover. I have my guess and I am afraid that if I never get the answer, I might have to live slightly uncomfortable
Starting point is 00:49:01 for the rest of my life. Love you guys. Let's look it up. Mm, I'll say this. I was always embarrassed about my hand in that because I feel like I have sort of gross hands. So I'm the gross one. Interesting. Okay, I'm pulling it up.
Starting point is 00:49:15 I think I'm left, Andy's middle, and Keev is right, but I don't know if that's true. That's just a guess. Why did I base that on? I think you're correct. I think you're right though. I think your left, I'm middle, Keev's right. Yeah. Yeah,'re correct. I think you're right though. I think your left eye middle key's right. Yeah, for sure.
Starting point is 00:49:27 Wow, that was from memory. And this is where my memory goes guys, to that question. It's all been airbrushed though. I mean, just cleaned up. Is it all of our right hands? Yeah, it's all of our right hands. We are all right-handed. And look, we apologize to all the hand models out there
Starting point is 00:49:41 for not going natural. No makeup, hashtag no makeup. That's true, but I do have a little bit of tiny bit of scarring on my right hand. I was still straight edge so they had to clean up my axes. So because you wouldn't stop putting pen, like permanent pen on your hand. I just had those things from, again, don't try to buy me beers. Come on. Oh no, wait. no, it's wrong. Keef's left, I'm right.
Starting point is 00:50:07 That's what we said. Oh, we did. I'm on the far left, you're on the far right, and he's in the middle. Wait, really? I think. I think I'm the one having to really twist my hand on the left there. Well, no, yours is good. I'm having to really reach for it.
Starting point is 00:50:18 I thought that was Yorm. Look how much more hair Akiva has than either me or Andy. Is that real? That was fake. That was put on. Let me see your arm, Keef. Do you have more hair on your arm than either me or Andy? Is that real? That was fake, that was put on. Let me see your arm, Keef. Do you have more hair on your arm than Yoram? He does, he's a real man. Yeah, yeah, that's definitely me on the other day.
Starting point is 00:50:31 And obviously, yes, they photoshopped out all of our needle prick tattoos that we had been doing the whole summer. Yeah, oh yeah. Our henna. Yeah, Yoram's henna. All right, we got an audio one coming up next. Let's hit it.
Starting point is 00:50:42 Fuck yeah! Hey, Quades, long time Quadeade first time, I guess, caller. This question is for Andy and Seth specifically. And it has to do with the spelling bee. I'll field it, which is a pretty big part of the show. I'll feel this. And maybe the New York times should be a sponsor or something. We would accept that.
Starting point is 00:51:01 When you say you were using hints, are you looking at just the official hints, the one in the post, where it tells you how many words start with certain letters, or are you reading the comments for more specific hints? I was just curious since you seem really good at the spelling bee. Thanks for this great show. Quaid army forever. I mean, first off, you don't use hints very often. I try not to use any hints.
Starting point is 00:51:24 Yeah. I'm so not use any hints. Yeah. I'm so not a Spelling Bee guy that I just assumed he was talking about the Will Forte, Jack Black sketch. I did actually think that was what he was talking about for us, too. I also thought that at first. We have two really important meanings for Spelling Bee on this podcast.
Starting point is 00:51:37 One is one of our favorite sketches ever written, Spelling Bee. And one is just like a lifestyle. And one is, yeah, like a really important thing that proves that you're smart or not. All right, answer it, Andy, I'm curious. Uh, I never look at comments. No kind of comment hints.
Starting point is 00:51:53 On a day when I use hints, I always disclose to whomever I'm sharing my score with how many hints I used. Uh, many days, it's none. Often, though, and I don't consider this a proper hint, but feel free to disagree with me out there. I will look at total number of words, total score. Because you want to know where the goalposts are just at the end.
Starting point is 00:52:14 As my guide rails. I'll take it as far as I can. I'm almost always well past, this is their word, not mine, the genius distinction before I look at that. And then sometimes if I'm really hung up, I will then go into the actual proper hints, which is how many words that start with each letter. And if you're really fucked, you look at how many of the like first letter and second letter underneath that. And is it a button you hit saying, do you want a hint?
Starting point is 00:52:42 And if you hit it, you know the first hint's just gonna be like, there are 62 words today. No, no, it's in the upper right. There's a more pull down screen and then you hit hints. And then I often will scroll down real slow so I don't see the big grid. So I just see number of words, points, number of pangrams. Well, that's what I, that's what I was wondering is how do you avoid getting a spoiler you didn't want?
Starting point is 00:53:03 Yes. I, I'm very strict about it with myself because I like to know that I'm doing it as clean as possible. And what's the diagnosis on this? I think it's probably some sort of like OCD, ADHD, something like that. Yeah, but you haven't been properly assessed. No, no, no, I wouldn't dare. It might derail the whole enterprise.
Starting point is 00:53:21 Yeah. Okay, can I just, as contrast, Andy, you didn't respond to me the other day when I said I used 30 hints when I got Queen Bee, um, but the way I did it, it was literally looking at the entire list and then just sitting there plugging in the words. Huh. So I would say your version of hints doesn't, in my mind, doesn't even...
Starting point is 00:53:40 One, I didn't know you could do that. I only used cheat, like, 30 times. Andy, ha ha, I did respond, you fucking C word. Oh jeez. You know what I wanna apologize to you. So vindicated that it was worth calling you the C word, but not saying it, but saying C word. But if I was British, I would have said it, but I'm not.
Starting point is 00:54:01 Oh, if only it were nine o'clock. Too harsh. But I just want you to know, you were wrong. FYI, this is from Jeff, FYI, we also got an email from the New York Times Games saying they're fans of the pod. Well, that's wonderful. How nice. Fuck yeah. Obviously the feeling is mutual from Andy and Seth, me and Yormir.
Starting point is 00:54:21 We just watch TV and cartoons and stuff. Have I talked about how I've expanded the games I do? My friend Dan Gore, apparently he does this with his brother, try to get letterboxed in two words. That's my new thing I've added. Oh my God. That's so hard and so frustrating. I can't even imagine.
Starting point is 00:54:35 I get it, at least half the time, maybe most days at this point. As puzzlers, there's a little trivia for you. I directed a Brooklyn Nine-Nine episode and Will Shortz, the, you know, Yeah, the cameo! famous crosswords creator from New York Times was in it. Yeah. Oh my god. That's very exciting. It was a treat. It was very fun.
Starting point is 00:54:52 He kept just bragging about like books that he had read. I read the whole thing. We were like, all right, cool. I would assume you'd finish it if you started. He's like, yeah, you know my pages. He kept asking if I knew how many pages books were. And I'm like, that's not really even a thing anymore, because it's like, you can read on an iPad, and you can make the font bigger, and the page number will get longer. And he's like, yeah, but this was like the original print,
Starting point is 00:55:11 like a hardcover. And I go, yeah, but then later, it's a paperback. The page numbers changed. Like, you don't want to brag about page numbers. And he just wasn't hearing it. Right. He's old school. But then do you remember, he was to you,
Starting point is 00:55:21 he was like, what do you read? And you were like, mother fucker, I don't read books, I read scripts. Right, that's right. And I was like, whoa, first off, the voice was inappropriate. Yeah, it was weird. I put on an affectation, let's just call it, to be generous. Yeah, I was just like, Keev, you're well out of school, obviously. Yeah, it was weird. It was not okay.
Starting point is 00:55:41 And then secondly, he just was like, OK, and like walked off. Yeah, I just wanted to big time him. Yeah. Anyway, big shout out to Schwartz. This episode of the Lonely Island podcast is brought to you by our friends at Makers Mark. And I'm with some of my friends right now. Hi, guys.
Starting point is 00:55:56 Hello. Hi. You know, Margie Samuels was a spirited woman. She was also the co-founder of Makers Mark. I don't have to tell you guys this stuff. No. No, we know it. But our listeners might not, so continue.
Starting point is 00:56:06 All right, well, in honor of Women's History Month, we wanted to toast some of the spirited women in our lives. That was my idea, actually. These guys were thinking about not doing it. I was like, we should. Yeah. You are, in many ways, as trailblazing as Margie Samuel Zjorm, and I've often said that.
Starting point is 00:56:21 Well, I kept saying, I want to mark this day with Maker's Mark. And you guys kept saying, what does that mean? I kept saying I want to mark this day with Makers Mark and you guys kept saying what does that mean? I was like it means a toast guys. Way to land the plane buddy. Thank you. I want to tell a story about a spirit of woman I saw during the 50th and I was a little bit lucky because I was there on Friday for some rehearsal action and I got to watch the Close Encounters rehearsal with Kate McKinnon.
Starting point is 00:56:47 And I feel it's the most I've ever watched an actor's process. Guys, I'm gonna wrap this up. You too can celebrate the spirit of women in your life with a free personalized label to go with the bottle of Maker's Mark. Head to makersmarkpersonalized.com and fill in the details in order to create
Starting point is 00:56:59 and mail your custom label. Don't forget to grab a bottle of Maker's Mark to go with it. Maker's Mark makes their bourbon carefully. Please enjoy it that way. Maker's Mark Kentucky straight bourbon whiskey 45% alcohol per volume. Copyright 2025 Maker's Mark Distillery, Incorporated Loretto, Kentucky. All right, do we have another caller here? What's up? Conscript in the Quaid army here. My partner Hannah made me a Lonely Island fan and is now really happy that they can wear their favorite Lonely Island t-shirt again. I just wanted to ask a question about the Sky in England by which I specifically mean
Starting point is 00:57:40 Lorne Michaels and Sky are doing a British version of Saturday Night Live. I heard that. And I know that Andy spent some time in foggy London town, I know that you almost spent some time in Lancaster. Just wondering what those guys think. Is it gonna work? Oh, is it gonna work? Yes, absolutely.
Starting point is 00:57:55 Everything that Lorne does is great. I think he's an amazing producer and so scared. So yeah, absolutely. Next question. I think it easily could. It just depends who they cast, as always, right? If you get rad comics that have cool ideas and fresh voices and good writers,
Starting point is 00:58:10 no reason why not. The format is proven. Certainly the UK has a large amount of the best sketch shows of all time, at least English sketch shows. English language sketch shows. Yeah, I'd be very excited to see the difference, honestly, just because, you know, I personally put British comedy often on a pedestal. Not all of it guys, come on.
Starting point is 00:58:30 But you know, I would love to see the differences. I do know that that was kind of a thing, however many years ago, like they were doing an Italian version. Well, that's what I was going to say. This is not the first time it's done. If there's a Korean one, like if you type in, I'm just doing it right now to see if I can find a good one. Yeah, Saturday Night Live Korea
Starting point is 00:58:46 has been going for 12 seasons. Wow. Oh, wow. So since we were at SNL, I remember when they started it. And I do know that they own sketches from the show, so they can also pull from SNL America. No, I remember seeing like the Jonah Hill dad short we did. I remember seeing a shot for shot remake in Italian. Whoa! Yeah, I forgot about that. Yeah, there's one that they shoot in Milan. Wait, how long has the Italian one been going then?
Starting point is 00:59:13 It was from 2006 to 2011 and then it was shortly revived again in 2018. So four seasons. Okay. I mean, it's a cool format to like see music and comedy. It makes sense to me that there hasn't been a UK one because for a British performer who needs to promoting a movie, they can go on the American version. We all speak the same language. Yeah. But there's also never a shortage of people willing to host SNL, so I don't think they're gonna be like competing for the hosts. Right. No, that's true. And everything that Lorne Michaels does is just fantastic.
Starting point is 00:59:44 Oh, wow. He's thought this through. Yeah, that's true. And everything that Lorne Michaels does is just fantastic. Oh, wow. He thought this through. Yeah, just wonderful producer. I wouldn't mind going and living in London. Maybe I throw my hat in the ring. I don't know. Host update much? I would love to see that.
Starting point is 00:59:53 I would as well. I mean, immediately it made me think maybe that's our chance to be musical guest on SNL, quote unquote. Oh, yeah. They might actually let it happen. Especially in the early times. Just put it out there to the producers of SNL London that we would like to be the first musical guest and then failure right at the top.
Starting point is 01:00:14 All right, Sarah says, hey, besties, please read it out like that. I think I did. I've been a fan since 2006, and I'm a fellow Bay Area and Jewish, well, that's only fellow to some of us. And my dad and I watch day drinking with Seth every time I'm home. Love your work, hope it takes off one day.
Starting point is 01:00:34 I saw Lonely Island in concert in Anaheim in June 2019 and it was the best day of my life. No one loves pop star like me and when you performed Finest Girl, I was the only one in the front section that knew the words and was hype. Andy missed the dance cue because we were yelling at each other. What? She snuck a lot of nice little burns in there. Yeah, yeah. This is a backhanded compliment. When you threw XXL shirts, I tried to jump up and catch one and missed because I'm 5'4 and consumed by anger.
Starting point is 01:01:05 The guy behind me caught it and handed it to me like a gentleman. He and I got to talking, exchanged numbers, and long story short, we're getting married. Wow. A lot of turns in this here, female. The wedding's in May in Long Beach. I just wanted you to know that even on my wedding day to this magnificent man, that day seeing you in concert will still be the best day in my life.
Starting point is 01:01:27 I'm still waiting in the TJ Maxx parking lot. That's where we booked the reception. So rad. That's amazing. Well, joke's on you. I could not have missed a dance move because there were none planned. Every night he did it 100% perfect.
Starting point is 01:01:45 Random flailing. I was gonna say it was all just sort of freeform, yeah. That's what I mean. It can't be wrong. Oh, it can't be. Yeah, yeah, you're right. That's a wonderful story, and congratulations on your engagement, and I hope it's a wonderful wedding. And I'm assuming your first dance is gonna be the finest girl?
Starting point is 01:02:02 I feel like it has to be. Oh, man, you better make sure that the guest list is gonna be all right with that. Yeah, that's gonna be bad news. That's not a clean one. That Anaheim show was a lot of fun, and it was the most intimate show we did, because technically it was before the tour.
Starting point is 01:02:16 It was not an announced one, so to speak. It was a practice show that we did a week before going on tour, or a few days, but it was teeny, compared to every other venue, because we just wanted to see what worked. a practice show that we did a week before going on tour or a few days. But it was teeny compared to every other venue because we were just wanted to see what worked. And at the end of it, after I'm on a Boat, we were having so much fun. And it was so intimate with just like maybe 500 people or something that we were like, should we just try some other things? So then we tried to do IncrediBad Live. Even though we had not really rehearsed it. And we were kind of a mess because
Starting point is 01:02:43 it's so much back and forth. It's when we don't remember whose line is whose. It was okay. But then as soon as we got off stage, we were like, end it, I'm gonna vote. Yep, yep, end it, I'm gonna vote. And we never did it again. It was a lot of handshakes. Okay, okay, got it. That's why you experiment.
Starting point is 01:02:56 That's why you do practice shows. But that was the first and only time we ever quote unquote performed the song Incredibad. That's right. First and last. Okay, so we'll end on a vest comment, which I assume is gonna be positive, Jeff. and only time we ever quote unquote performed the song you cried about. That's right. First and last. Okay, so we'll end on a vest comment, which I assume is gonna be positive, Jeff.
Starting point is 01:03:10 Okay, so Ryan J. Hurdle said that, "'It looks like Yoram's picking up trash on the side of the highway, but they gave him a vest that would make sure he'd get run over.'" I wasn't on board until the last part. That's a last vest comment, just to kind of bookend the episode. Well thanks Ryan.
Starting point is 01:03:28 Thanks for weighing in on the comments. Ryan, this is Andy, me and Akiva like you and we have your back. We thought that your joke about Yoram getting hit by a car was funny because his vest was ugly. His vest was so ugly he deserves to be hit by a car. Do we want to put in something at the end of this that's a secret message for Seth to test whether or not he listened?
Starting point is 01:03:50 Oh, that's a great idea. If he actually listens back to the episode. What should we say? It could just be as simple as a color. Like the color is periwinkle. And we go, Seth, how'd you like the pod? And he's like, I loved it. What was the color?
Starting point is 01:04:01 And I'll go, huh? Yeah, yeah, periwinkle's the right color also. Great, that's great. What color is periwinkle though? It's like a, yeah. Periwinkle's the right color also. Great. That's great. What color is Periwinkle though? It's like a light blue. It's kind of like the lavender, blueish lavender. Oh, shit. We're weighing on the comments. What color is Periwinkle?
Starting point is 01:04:15 All right, that was the lonely island in Seth Meyers' pot. Quaid army officially the Periwinkle players. So to recap, next week we're gonna get people weighing in on what color Periwinkle is and how much a dos modos burrito which has been discontinued at Baja Fresh Costs. And what you think my best cost. Oh yes, don't forget the most important one. I don't know if anybody's ready for that answer.
Starting point is 01:04:35 I'm scared of it, to be honest. Yeah, that's probably right. Oh, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, what the? This motherfucker. How'd it go? We're still doing it. Oh God, is it bad? Has it been bad?
Starting point is 01:04:47 He FaceTimed in so we could see him. Are you at the Bar Mitzvah? Yeah, see look, about to have some backyard Bar Mitzvah. You're there before it starts? Well, yeah, we had to fly here and then we just got here early. Wait, wait, Seth, is this your Bar Mitzvah? Oh, he's like Drake in that music video.
Starting point is 01:05:04 He's doing a late in life Bar Mitzvah? Oh, he's like Drake in that music video. He's doing a late in life Bar Mitzvah. I am. This is, let me stress, the one way I'm like Drake. I did have a late Bar Mitzvah. Now you moisturize too. Yeah, that's it. I guess there's... Well, you know what? It's probably 50-50 ways I'm like Drake. But it's been bad, right? The pod? The pod?
Starting point is 01:05:23 Yeah. People feel bad. Oh, we realized that a car needs four wheels, Seth. It's off the rails, yeah. We're bad. Yeah. Seth, I was so excited for a second because from the look of your little tiny image here,
Starting point is 01:05:38 I really thought you were wearing a vest for a second. Oh, that would have been so sweet. Now I can tell you're not, so. I think there wasn't enough tie. Did you guys go over some of the vest burns, do we have to do that when I get back? No, we did them. Yeah, no we did. There might be some we missed.
Starting point is 01:05:50 We just did a cursory. I mean, there's almost a thousand comments. Ro on the vest alone? Also Seth, if on the flight back you wanna just write some new ones, that would be nice too. Okay, yeah, that's true. You don't have to, you don't have to.
Starting point is 01:06:02 I think we covered it. If Seth has an active imagination, I just feel like we should put him to good use. Thank you. You know, it's true. You don't have to. You don't have to. I think we covered it. If Seth has an active imagination, I just feel like we should put him to good use. Thank you. You know, it's really special to hear that on the day I become a man. I should have invited you to make some speech about my special imagination. Seth, you're doing circumcision right after in front of everybody? Are you gonna do that like...
Starting point is 01:06:20 Yeah. Well, it wasn't ideally supposed to be that way, but then the guy was only available at the same time, so yeah. Right on, Righteous Kill, I should say. Sorry, Quaid Army. Oh, Righteous Kill. Apologies, Squid Army, for not saying Righteous Kill the first time.
Starting point is 01:06:31 Squid Army? It's hard to say it's Squid Army, that's cool. You don't even know the name of our army. I missed one podcast and now it's Squid Army? Oh yeah. We could change it to Squid Army. By the way, Seth, we changed it again, so you have to listen to the whole pod to find out the new name of the Squid Army. All right change it to Squid Army. By the way, Seth, we changed it again. So you have to listen to the whole pod
Starting point is 01:06:45 to find out the new name of the Squid Army. All right, I love you guys. I'm sorry to invite you to my bar, Pets. That's okay. We were just wrapping up, so this can be the wrap up. Oh, yeah, this is good. This way, well, if this is the end then, we can just do a nice sign off, right?
Starting point is 01:06:59 Yeah, perfect. Absolutely. That's right, we can certainly say we love each other. Well, I love you guys. Love you guys. Love you. And we love you, Seth. See you next week. See you each other. Well, I love you guys. Love you guys. Love you. And we love you, Seth. See you next week. See you next week.
Starting point is 01:07:08 Alright, bye. Bye. Bye guys.

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