The Lonely Island and Seth Meyers Podcast - The Date & Megan's Roommate

Episode Date: August 5, 2025

This week The Lonely Island and Seth Meyers are joined by special guests Will Forte and John Solomon! The group chats about opening weekend of The Naked Gun before going into two digital shorts starri...ng Megan Fox: The Date and Megan’s Roommate. Show Notes: The Date | https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4SBo5wzn4MI Megan's Roommate | https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TkiVFQyPqAU Akiva on Jake Tapper | https://www.cnn.com/2025/07/31/entertainment/video/the-lead-akiva-schaffer-the-naked-gun-movie-police-squad-jake-tapper Seth's Late Night Staff Corrects His Pronunciation of ""Croissant"" | https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DTIvM64YFbw Potato Chip - Will Forte | https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4asQ1-vUugA&t=19s Xavier: Renegade Angel | https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLQl8zBB7bPvJh3KIb9uSW4CvIeEkvXRZQ Not all the clips we mention are available online; some never even aired. Photos and anything else mentioned in the episode can be found by following us on Instagram @thelonelyislandpod Support our sponsors: Quince Level up your bedding with Quince — you’ll feel the difference right away. Go to www.Quince.com/island for free shipping on your order and three hundred and sixty-five -day returns Wonderful Pistachios Grab a bag today. www.wonderfulpistachios.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 Hey, hey, it's the Lonely Island and Sam Myers podcast show. Hey, everybody. Welcome to the podcast. We got one person missing, but two filling in. Hi, fellas. OK, we're off to a hot start as far as replying to me. Hi. We're joined by a couple of friends of the pod,
Starting point is 00:00:25 Will Forte and John Solomon, because they worked on a very memorable short that we're gonna get to. But I can also say hello to Andy and Akiva. Hi, guys. Pew pew pew pew pew. So happy to be here. Big fan. Quite army.
Starting point is 00:00:38 Righteous, Carol. I would love to just kick things off by wishing Akiva a happy Naked Gun Day. Today is the official opening of Naked Gun. We're talking to you on August 1st. Thank you. Thank you for wishing that on me. And to you and yours as well.
Starting point is 00:00:53 Oh, thank you. I mean, I am celebrating, maybe not to the same extent as you, but there's certainly jubilation ringing from the many towers of the kingdom. Thank you for putting it exactly that way. You're quite welcome. I have seen many, many acolades.
Starting point is 00:01:09 Yes, acolades. Oh, the acolades are pouring in, my kiba. Yeah. If there's a drink at the Shaffer household today, it's piña acolada, right? Is that what you're drinking? Piña acolada. Oh, Liz is in the kitchen with the blender
Starting point is 00:01:24 just hooking those up for me right now. Do you want a mejor acolada? No, just a piña acolada. Oh, Liz is in the kitchen with the blender just hooking those up for me right now. Do you want a mejor acolada? No, just a piña. I know you only care about the Rotten Tomato number, so I will ask, what are we holding at right now, Keef? Oh, well, I think we're at 90, but... It's 90. I've been vigilant. With how many counted? Uh, let's see.
Starting point is 00:01:40 I'm gonna tell you, it's ever, ever on my phone. Bro, 90 for a studio comedy? Andy, check again, bud. 91, brother! As of this recording, 91% out of 170 reviews. Do you know how many people that is, Seth? That's a lot. 170, dude. That's a lot of reviewers.
Starting point is 00:01:59 That means people are taking this movie seriously, which is the best thing in the world for a dumb movie. Forte, you've never done anything that even came close to that, dude. Right, I know. Yeah, I was gonna say, what's the gap? Keev, what was the previous high? Nebraska probably was pretty high.
Starting point is 00:02:13 Yeah, no, Nebraska. Don't take all my talking points, I was gonna bring it. Hang on, I'm gonna just quickly check Nebraska. 91 on the dot, oh, Keev. Oh, it's a neck and neck. Shit, I'm gonna start a magazine. They do have 253 reviews though, Keith. Oh, 253?
Starting point is 00:02:30 Yeah. Shit, that's a long, another 100 to hold 91 is pretty tough. Yeah, you got a long way to go. Interesting, so I have a question, Forte, you just said you're gonna start a cinema reviewing magazine. My question is, will you write a negative review
Starting point is 00:02:43 about Naked Gun to bring it down a peg or a positive review about Nebraska to bring it up a peg? How are you going to approach this? Because it's a good plan. I mean, do both, right? Because I'm going to write a positive review about Naked Gun because I care about my friend. Oh, wow. That's really something. And I don't care about status and tomato meters. No.
Starting point is 00:03:03 Yeah. Even though we all know that the tomato meter is the definitive way to know if a comedy is good. Yes, that's true. That's true. So Forte, does that mean that Nebraska and MacGruber is a perfect hundred? If you add them up together? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:03:17 Yeah, essentially. MacGruber's got nine to spare, right? We're way above nine, bro. Of course you are. And by the way, if people could re-review McGruber, here's what I'm enjoying about the reviews for the Naked Gun. I feel like critics are understanding a little bit
Starting point is 00:03:34 the moment and like now's not the time to try to seem like a smart person by saying this is a dumb comedy. I think they're embracing, you can be like, I am a smart person and other smart people made a dumb comedy that people enjoy. And therefore it does everything it's set out to do and we should reward that. That's what I kind of like about it.
Starting point is 00:03:52 I agree and that's the rarest thing. It almost never happens. I certainly, I would never would have dared to wish for this score this high, certainly. Maybe you're ushering in a new era. I hope so. As of this recording, the most important part of what I'm looking at on Rotten Tomatoes
Starting point is 00:04:08 is that the naked gun is one percentage point higher than those fucking assholes Dave Franco and Alison Breeze movie together. Oh, wow. Those fucking assholes. Those smug sons of bitches. They think they're so great with their 90% positive. Actually, Dave sent me a really nice email.
Starting point is 00:04:27 Oh, they can, it's not, Ernest. They don't mean it. Oh, it was a trick. But by the way, so like, obviously, I've read great things about their movie, and they are a real life couple on screen playing a real life couple. That is not how Naked Guns started.
Starting point is 00:04:40 No, but also that's a rare- Ooh, the rumor build-up churn. That's really rare too. People famously don't like seeing real life couples on screen. They're happy to have it be that there's a budding romance from it. The start is okay, but a known married couple, it's like watching your parents kiss. So the fact that they're at a 90,
Starting point is 00:04:57 that's such a small bullseye to hit. So kudos. I'm gonna give credit to them as a celebrity couple. I don't feel like they're out there all the time dining out on the fact that they're a couple. Yeah. And Forte, that's why when MacGruber came out, you kept it under the radar that you and Powers Booth were hooking up, right?
Starting point is 00:05:13 That's exactly why. Yeah. RIP. Much love. I wanted to shout it to the world, but it was Powers who's like, hey, bud. Oh, speaking of MacGruber, it was my anniversary last night. We were walking down after dinner. Look what I saw that I saw this this was a
Starting point is 00:05:32 just a on the City streets as Doc Holliday. Yeah. Yeah, my good friend Val is not going let the record show He held up his phone with a photo of Val Kilmer. Oh, I'm sorry. It looks like it was a with a photo of Val Kilmer from Tombstone. It looked like it was a mural. It was a mural. Was it? Yes.
Starting point is 00:05:47 Oh, it's a mural on a wall? Yeah, it looks like a picture. It's a very well done mural. Forte's not a full-time Pcaster, so he is gonna just like kind of hold up his phone every now and then, thinking that's good content, but we're gonna jump in and save him whenever we can. Was that a little emotional for reals though, Forte?
Starting point is 00:06:02 I think I'd feel a little emotional just seeing that. Yeah, oh yeah. When Forte? I think I'd feel a little emotional just seeing that. Yeah. Oh yeah. When Forte did the War of the Worlds radio show, he would go, they're coming, the things. That's right. That's right. You wouldn't describe them?
Starting point is 00:06:15 Don't look at them, everyone look at them. Run for your lives, something is happening. They said the amazing thing about Forte's was a day before the other one, cause nobody killed themselves. Nobody was so worried it was real that they jumped out windows. That's the story about War of the Worlds, right? That people thought it was real.
Starting point is 00:06:30 Did people actually kill themselves? I just heard that they were worried it was real. I mean, that might be apocryphal. I don't think anyone jumped out of windows, but it was widespread worry. Definitely a panic ensued. Yeah, exactly. A panic ensued.
Starting point is 00:06:43 By the way, John, you were supposed to say trigger warning before Seth said that thing about suicide. What I was going to say is that this is crazy we're talking about this because there's a real alien spaceship descending on Earth right now. Is it really? Have you guys seen that? No. Harvard scientists said there's a real alien spaceship on its way right now. And that's like six-page news.
Starting point is 00:07:02 Do you think they have to do stuff like that to get funding back from Trump? Maybe. It's just a lot of like real big wet stories. They'll divert some Space Force when it's that. I wonder if this in the spaceship world, if it's one that's just kind of slowly coming at us, if it's like there are Lamborghinis and then these guys are like in the pinto of spaceships. Right. and then these guys are like in the pinto of spaceships.
Starting point is 00:07:26 Right. They were like, it's moving so slow, we think these maybe aren't aliens with a lot of money. Yeah. Hey, Keev, you were on the lead with Jake Tapper. Yeah. And at the end of the interview, he said, quate army. Yeah. And you responded, righteous kill.
Starting point is 00:07:42 And I was very impressed. Oh, good. You know what? I didn't rewatch it and here was my fear that they didn't include it. Oh, it's in. Well, because here's what happened in the beginning of the whole thing. He said it, but there's a slight delay because I was doing this over, not Zoom, but the equivalent of Zoom, a video chat where you're at home and he's doing it. And if I looked at him, even
Starting point is 00:08:03 his mouth didn't quite match the words because it's going through their whole broadcast equipment. You guys know how it works. And so he railed past the equator, like, hey, my guest here's a Keef, you know, he knows I'm a big fan because I like, you know, lonely island, did her shorts, quake army, blah, blah. And he kept going. And I was like, I am contractually obligated to say, right, just kill here. But I can tell he's going so fast. And there's always that two seconds when you watch the news and it's a remote where the person goes, so what do you think of that? And there's that like one second and then the person goes, well, good question. Thank you. And I knew I was on that delay. And so I still said it, but it got kind of
Starting point is 00:08:35 buried under his next sentence completely. And I'm like sitting there like, oh, I know. And so I just wanted to say, when you say Quaid Army, we've gone a lot about how you can't also say Quaid Army, Righteous Kill, because it leaves us with nothing. But also, don't just start your next sentence. You gotta leave a gap. And if you're on a live broadcast CNN with a delay, you gotta leave an extra long gap.
Starting point is 00:08:58 But there's another option. There's another option, which is just like, if you blow past it, don't expect a Righteous Kill back. Well, he clearly didn't, but I felt like if you blow past it, don't expect a righteous kill back. Yeah. Well, he clearly didn't. But I felt like if you leave it out there hanging, it's, you know, there's an A side to B side. It's weird. Keeva just texted me, I want to say it gave me blue balls,
Starting point is 00:09:12 but I don't know if I should say it on the part. I think we should. Yeah. Well, I think the important thing is like, if you're a CNN anchor, who's gonna interview Keev, Dan Abash, Wolf Blitzer, leave a gap. Yeah. Don't give him the proverbial blue balls
Starting point is 00:09:27 that he don't desperately want to say, but I think is inappropriate. Oh, but I'm so happy that by the end that I got one in. Now, so yesterday, Liam was on your show, on Seth's show, and I knew he was about to go out there. And I knew that if Liam said, like, oh, Seth's so good to be here, quiet army, that Seth would have to go, righteous kill.
Starting point is 00:09:46 And then the whole audience would be silent. Like why did they just do that? There'd probably be like four people that would go, woo! And then Seth would be hot in a moment of having to say, am I about to try to explain this unexplainable thing to this audience or am I going to just blow right past it? And I told Liam, you just blow past, like, just, like, nod at him, like, a knowing nod and just leave it. Just, you just let Seth Blounder out there or handle it gracefully, I don't know.
Starting point is 00:10:11 And then Liam is so apologetic because he even practiced it with his assistant and then got up on there and then you were playing the clip of the movie that plays always. And he was seeing a line that he had always wished he had set a different line for. So this is his text to me, so apologetic and he's like, I saw it and I started thinking about, oh man, I wish I had said it this other way. Then he just wiped his brain clean,
Starting point is 00:10:38 then he sat down and had the interview. Then he got off and was like, god damn it. But he also was so much more apologetic than he even needed to be. He's such a sweet guy. I was trying to be like, oh, this did not matter at all. It was just a prank on Seth. It was fine. It's funny you saying he wanted to do something differently.
Starting point is 00:10:53 I went to the premiere in New York City on Monday. It was a great time. Seeing it live was absolutely fantastic. And the thing that I liked is I talked to Liam and I talked to Pamela and I talked to Danny Houston because all three of them have never been in a movie like this and been asked to do this thing. And all three of them had this loving complaint.
Starting point is 00:11:12 It's like, yeah, and then you have to do the alts. And they just complained. And the alts for people to know is like, when you're doing a comedy movie, you do the scene the way it's been written a few times, and then a bunch of comedy writers are like, now just say this line, and say this line. And it's so funny, way it's been written a few times, and then a bunch of comedy writers are like, now just say this line and say this line. And it's so funny, because it's the most that, like,
Starting point is 00:11:28 you're just treated like a seal at the zoo. Yeah. I don't know how many alts he had to do on Marlowe. I should have asked. Yeah. But to be clear, Seth, when you're a comedian, the alts are like mana from heaven, where you're like, oh, I'm protecting it,
Starting point is 00:11:45 protecting this moment so that we'll for sure. Of course. Have one thing that works hopefully. Yeah. By the way, I explained that to them very early on before we ever started the process and they were troopers. I didn't get pushback on set, but it is funny hearing afterwards how much they bothered them.
Starting point is 00:12:03 Well, it doesn't bother them, but you just realize, for them, they were in a different genre. And anytime I think you do a different genre, you have to put trust into the genre pros who are working on the movie. Yes. And it was very sweet. All of them, like Danny and Liam were saying,
Starting point is 00:12:18 they had worked together before, and that made their scenes, it was just harder to not laugh at each other. And so they would just stare at each other's foreheads in the scenes, which I thought was, oh, that's good. Borte, how many alts would you do on Nebraska? I don't know, you know, 100 a second. 100 a second, Jesus.
Starting point is 00:12:38 100 per second? Just ballpark. They also, every scene they made you also do one where you said Idaho, because they weren't sure which state. They were like every scene they made you also do one where you said Idaho, because they weren't sure which state. They were like, we want to know in post. Yeah, they're holding off. Like protecting for PG-13.
Starting point is 00:12:51 We don't know if we can clear Nebraska. No, I feel like there were, I don't know if there was a single alt. I think it was all like- That was kind of what I was getting at, yeah. I was implying there wouldn't have been one. So good, we're all on the same page. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:13:07 I wouldn't have been sure about that. Alexander Payne is a very, also very funny filmmaker when he wants to be, and I wouldn't be surprised if he kept it loose. You never know. Oh, I don't remember him being, like, particularly like, oh, you gotta say every word like this, but I, you know, I think he, I think he really liked the script going in and...
Starting point is 00:13:24 Well, you're famously loose with your scripts, Will. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Hey, I do want one last thing that I really liked is, I was talking with Liam and Dani, and Liam was like, oh, this is our fourth film together. And I go, can you name them all? And it was really great, because Liam put up a figure,
Starting point is 00:13:42 goes, Clash of the Titans, and then Dani goes, Wrath of the Titans. And I was just like, this is the best. What a perfect duo. That's awesome. Before you move on, I just want to say the relief I felt in my body yesterday when the reviews started coming in good was like the amount of stress I was holding for months, knowing I was holding the stress, but also not knowing, and then just being like, oh my God, people like it. And knowing how it can go the other way, when has for us in certain instances
Starting point is 00:14:14 and how sad it feels. I just want to give a moment of gratefulness of like, because we've talked about how it felt with hot rod. Yeah. And just being like, oh my God, whether or not it even makes real money this weekend or not, just the fact that I did my job. Yes. Where it was like, yep, I made the movie. Because if it doesn't get good reviews and then also doesn't perform, then everything can be blamed on the movie.
Starting point is 00:14:38 Whereas if it gets good reviews, then you're like, oh, well, the movie is good. And then it's just about the world and the weekend and whatever other things you want to talk about. But it was like I felt the relief're like, oh, well, the movie's good. Then it's just about the world and the weekend and whatever other things you want to talk about. But it was like I felt the relief of like, I don't have to think about that. Yeah. Dude, I think we all have been in that situation where you're super proud of something,
Starting point is 00:14:56 and then you feel like reviewers might be watching a different movie. Yes. Very happy for you. Thank you. I And proud of you. Here's some other movies that are out right now that it has a higher score than. This isn't a competition, but go ahead.
Starting point is 00:15:12 Materialists, eat shit. Wow. The Life of Chuck, fucking die slow. Oh my God. Sinners, you didn't beat Sinners. No, I don't. K-pop Demon Hunters, as we've discussed, higher. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:15:24 28 years later later suck a butt What else we got who else wants it Lilo and stitch go fuck yourself Great pull quotes for the poster. Yeah Oh, what's up the bad guys to heard you were gonna try and make some money this weekend too bad Your score is a pathetic 85 It would be funny to do a poster with all these quotes and then people say like, it's weird that they put in that Sinners is higher.
Starting point is 00:15:50 Yeah, Sinners is higher. I like that. You got a shout out Sinners, that shit is so tight. They are just turned up. What else we got? Superman, I don't think so, you piece of fart. It is, I'm glad you said that honestly, Keith, because it is also that thing, and again,
Starting point is 00:16:09 we've talked about movies here that are far more respected now than they were when they came out. Like, as much as people tell you, even your friends, people you respect more than, and trust more than maybe the critics or the audience when they're like, hey, man, it doesn't matter what they say, your movie's great. Like, that is really cold comfort at the time.
Starting point is 00:16:28 So it's nice that, like... Yes, it's like when you've had a terrible breakup and you've been broken up with and your friends are like, ah, she sucked anyways. And you're like crying because you loved her so much. It doesn't help. Yeah. Hey, I wanna say, and we're gonna get to John and Will
Starting point is 00:16:44 and your short, and we really, just mostly, we're just so happy you're here. Thank you, dudes. Thanks for having us. I read the comments on the last episode. I wasn't here for the last episode. I read the comments first. Right. And it was really fun to be like, what the fuck happened?
Starting point is 00:16:57 Like when somebody just wrote like, oh, man, I hope they get Ben Folds to leave a voice note. And I'm like, I don't remember Ben Folds having leave a voice note. And I'm like, no, I don't remember Ben Folds having anything to do with a lowly advent short. That's hearsay, that's Paul Russ's memory of things. I don't know if that's true. Sure, and anybody right now being like, what are they talking about?
Starting point is 00:17:15 Go back and listen to the last episode. I just like that somebody at one point wrote, the theme song for Naked Gun is burlesque for dogs. Yeah, that's just facts. That's just facts. First one's hearsay, second one's facts. It's also a slightly longer app, and I'll tell you why, Seth, and I'll tell everybody,
Starting point is 00:17:32 if we keep this in, this dirt, is that me and Yoram thought we were the only two getting on, so we texted about how, oh, let's just do like a 30-minute Naked Gun kind of general one where I can just kind of give my spiel about like why people should see it and what I was attempting. And Andy Surprise visited his podcast.
Starting point is 00:17:49 We didn't know he was going to do it till his face showed up like 10 seconds before we were hitting record. It's true. It was a great pleasant surprise. But he didn't know that that's what we were doing. So he thought we were coming on to do part two of movie awards, kind of cleaning up the voice notes and doing some Q&A. And then me and Yoram just rattle on for 30 minutes about making a gun while he's kind of sitting up the voice notes and doing some Q&A. And then me and Yorm just
Starting point is 00:18:05 rattle on for 30 minutes about making a gun while he's kind of sitting there like, what the, what is happening? Why are they being so serious? Yes, but we had made a plan. And then he was like, all right, now time for movie awards. And so then it's also kind of two things put together. But there you go. It was a great episode. I really enjoyed it. I have a quick Yorm story before we get into the shorts, which is Tara Donnelly. Everybody on this podcast knows Tara Donnelly,
Starting point is 00:18:27 an incredible graphics person. Tara emailed me, because we work together still, and she's like, another YORM story is he was editing sloths. And we were working on it really late, and then I left to go home, because it was so late on Friday night. And when I got back on Saturday morning, everybody was so mad at me in graphics
Starting point is 00:18:48 because over the course of one evening, YORMA downloaded over 1,000 images from Getty Images, and it locked the SNL account, because I guess there's a limit. Oh, my God, I've never heard that. And so all the graphics people had, like, come in to start working on like weekend update graphics and they were locked out of the account.
Starting point is 00:19:09 God damn. And like, it wasn't as easy as like just buying a new account, cause like Getty images is like, you have to be like, you have to be like kissed in. It's not just for the public. And so she was like, it was like nine AM. It's also a Saturday morning. Yeah, it's six AM on the West coast and they literally can't do, she was like, it was like 9 a.m. It's also a Saturday morning. Yeah, it's 6 a.m. on the West Coast, and they literally can't do...
Starting point is 00:19:27 She was like, oh my god, and then they saw sloths and they were like, for this? Sloths is pretty good. They were like, oh... Sloths is pretty good, but they were like, why'd he download a thousand images? By the way, that should be the slogan for Yoram's entire existence. For this? Also, if he made, if he put a hundred pictures, like a slot is like a fun, cheap throwaway, but if he put like a hundred Getty images for like a thousand dollars each, all of a sudden it'd be a hundred thousand dollars. The price could go up fast.
Starting point is 00:19:54 He does tend to spend more than he's been budgeted for. Bless his heart. I have to go back just for a quick second to the Tara, Donnelly, the MacGruber Photoshop stories. The part that I always remember about that story was for those who don't know, we had this idea to have pictures of MacGruber like he had done modeling, nude modeling,
Starting point is 00:20:16 but it was like, you know, all these sexy, erotic photos, and we were gonna Photoshop a really small penis onto him. Yeah. So we took all these pictures with Mary Ellen Matthews and then sent them to Tara with the instructions like, can you Photoshop a small penis onto this? And she sends us back her first round. And I was looking at this and I'm like, that kind of doesn't look that far off from my own penis. So we're like, Tara, we said to Photoshop a small penis
Starting point is 00:20:48 onto this and she's like, that is a small penis. Oh, oh, I mean like jokingly small, you know, like comedically. She's like, yeah. She's like, yeah, we were laughing our asses off when we made this. We were dying in graphics. That's so good. I just came across some the other day,
Starting point is 00:21:10 like a couple days ago, that we must have asked her to do some with a teeny penis and really big balls. Because I think he's one of the fastest. I found, I'll send them to you guys. That definitely sounds funnier than I'm sure it looks. God damn it. Still the funniest thing in the world. Uh... All right, so we were talking about,
Starting point is 00:21:32 you guys were talking about Megan Fox at Movie Awards, where they cut to her and you had asked her to look mad. And she sort of nailed the assignment. Yes. So well that people thought she was actually mad. And I just think it's a good way into the date sketch because Megan Fox nails the assignment so hard in the sketch. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:21:51 Every time I watch it, Forte is so funny. Megan is so good. It is one of my favorite two-person scenes in, like, SNL history, and I never get bored watching either of you in this sketch. Thank you. Should we do watch-through? I think we gotta do a watch through. I think before we do a watch through, talk a little bit about how you came up with the idea
Starting point is 00:22:11 before we do a watch through on the day. John and I, do you remember what year this was? Did this come out? It's right after MacGruber's summer. Right, okay. Yeah, it's the season premiere after shooting MacGruber, so it's fall of 2009. Okay. So that makes sense when John, and I think Yorma also, but I did it a lot with John,
Starting point is 00:22:30 because John and I would be together all the time. And it was during that period when we were writing MacGruber, we'd take a break and we'd go down for lunch and I'd get into the elevator and I would just start talking. It's always in my memory, it's always in an elevator. You're talking to me like that. And just, you know, all that little stuff. How are you? Is the writing going well? Yeah. You know, stuff like that. But just do that to them all the time.
Starting point is 00:22:55 And then at some point we just got in the room where like, oh, we should, or you might have even said, we've got to write that guy as something. And then when she... Because of McGroover, right? Was that because you had shaved- Yeah, I don't even remember how it came about, but I just remember pestering you with that voice. All of it. It's such a bummer voice.
Starting point is 00:23:14 It's such a bummer voice for a guy to be at an elevator with you. And then you have like a buzzed haircut forte. Yeah, because of McGroober, we had to spend the summer in Albuquerque. If I didn't buzz my hair, I would have had to have not super long hair, but hair and then a wig band and then a wig cap and then the wig. If I do this, they can put the wig just directly on my head and it won't get as hot.
Starting point is 00:23:40 But it is a season premiere and it's the first time anyone who's ever watched the show has seen you looking like this. So it's really funny. Like, it's sort of a jarring visual, and then you talk in a way we've never heard you talk. Visuals feast, I guess you would say, right? It's a visual feast. Not to get into what's about to come,
Starting point is 00:23:55 but this guy's a SWAT team member, so it's within the character really. Yeah. Yeah, that's true. And it's shot on a I Ran So Far garden with a piano. Yeah. Seth, you were just on that garden. What floor is it? I was just on it. We were supposed to have our late night summer party out
Starting point is 00:24:10 in the Iran So Far garden. And then it was like a torrential rainstorm. The rain. So instead, we did it in like a conference room. But you went up there in the afternoon. It looked very pleasant. Was that a photo you had taken that you shared? Yeah, I did.
Starting point is 00:24:21 And did you have to get up there by going over a guy's desk through a window? No, there's a proper door now. There shared? Yeah, I did. And did you have to get up there by going over a guy's desk through a window? No, there's a proper door now. There is. Yeah. I thought that they maybe did that. Yeah, but you need a step up from the idea that I have. You have to have somebody who's got extra access to let you out.
Starting point is 00:24:36 People have more access in that building than you? You're the host of late night. Yeah. You're the king of the building, besides Fallon. They take something away from me every year now. Just a little bit. All of a sudden, I'm like, oh. So they took away the key. I'm like, the gym. And they're like, you have to king of the building besides Fallon they take something away from me every year now Just a little bit all of a sudden like oh, so they took away the key I'm like the gym and they're like you have to go through the back door. I'm like Seth tiny quick sidebar I want to compliment the the croissant sketch. Thanks buddy that you guys did on your show. It was so fucking funny
Starting point is 00:24:58 I loved it. Thank you I'll shout out the late night croissant sketch might be one of my favorite pieces of, like, old-school sketch comedy that we've ever done. -"I miss this." -"It's really fun." And Bayes has the... Bayes closes it out. It's a lot of our crew doing lines. -"Everybody was so good." -"Obviously, the link will be in the show notes."
Starting point is 00:25:15 Link in the show notes. -"Well, yeah, we'll probably play a clip from it, like, right now." -"Wait, none of this answers our croissant thing! Maybe our head writer can help. Hey, Baze. -"It's croissant. That's it. Croissant. You just say it, and then ideally, you shut the f*** up and eat it,
Starting point is 00:25:31 which none of you, none of you will ever do." -"Yeah, but in France..." -"Nope." -"Yeah, but, you know, my mom says that..." -"It doesn't matter. It's croissant. That's the word." -"And so now you guys have heard a little piece of it. You get the gist." -"Ha-ha-ha-ha! I love it." And may I just... I'll turn the compliment around while also complimenting heard a little piece of it. You get the gist. I love it. And may I just, I'll turn the compliment around while also complimenting myself a little bit, Andy.
Starting point is 00:25:50 I did an episode of Digman, you guys. Ooh, my main man. And first of all, I was very happy to be in an episode of Digman. But Digman is, I do play a guy named Chortles. Digman is so funny. I will write down like five or six things that make me laugh out loud every episode of Digman. And it's so, I mean, just the best.
Starting point is 00:26:09 It means a lot that you liked it and it means a lot that you did it. And don't worry, because it'll be streaming on Paramount Plus. You could buy it right now on iTunes and just pay money. You can. And YouTube TV, if people got YouTube TV. Yeah, I actually have had a lot of people asking me
Starting point is 00:26:24 about it because it's on Comedy Central and many people have cut their cords and don't have cable no more. Yeah. And they don't have the Comedy Central app. Yeah. And they maybe do have Paramount Plus, but there's a syndication deal on it that makes it, honestly, a long time till you can stream it
Starting point is 00:26:40 through your normal thing. You have to buy it. Well, wait, I watched it on Hulu, I think. But you probably have live TV. You have live TV it. Well, wait, I watched it on Hulu, I think. But you probably have live TV. You have live TV on Hulu? That's right. That's right. Yes. If you have live TV on Hulu, you can get it that way. I'm sure it's on... Anybody who pays for live TV has Comedy Central and Kintivo. Oh, okay.
Starting point is 00:26:55 Yeah. Got it. And any place that you can rent or buy a show, I think it's available. But anyone out there who wants to see it and is having trouble, I apologize. That's just the deal we made. And I am still grateful that the show gets produced and made. And I hope that anyone that wants to see it can find it somehow, because I do really love it. And again, Digman is an archie.
Starting point is 00:27:16 He's a disgraced archie. An archie is short for archaeologist. And it's certainly got a patina of Nick Cage on it. Is that fair to say? I think that's more than fair. So I'll... Oh, my God. But the hardest I laughed in the last episode,
Starting point is 00:27:27 I am gonna make you do it, Andy, is their underwater going through the wreckage of the Titanic, and Dickman's partner says, come over here quick, and can you make the noise you made while you doggy paddle over? Oh. Oh, no, no, no, no, no. No, no, no, no.
Starting point is 00:27:43 No, no, no, no. No, no, no, no. By the way, you won't be surprised to know I wanted the doggy paddling to go ten times longer. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. By the way, you won't be surprised to know I wanted the doggy paddling to go ten times longer. I was talking with Neil, who we, you know, make the show together, and he was like, I agree it would be funny, but we would end up having to cut like six other jokes. Yeah, because the jokes come fast and furious. I can't believe.
Starting point is 00:28:01 Like, just the number of like, I know it's animated, so this is different, but just the number of locations is crazy. Oh my god, it's't believe. Just the number of, I know it's animated, so this is different, but just the number of locations is crazy. Oh my God, it's so fun. Just action adventure. Support, as I've said, also comes from Quince. You know, I'd been hearing people rave about linen sheets forever, and now I finally get it. I made the switch to Quince, and now, now I'm obsessed.
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Starting point is 00:28:48 It's the perfect mix of relaxed and refined, and it just gets softer with every wash, which is, you know, like a lot of products get worse with time, not quince. So be like me, snuggle in to European 100% flax. Get cozy, get your room pulled together. It's a great product. You're gonna love it. Level up your bedding with Quince. You'll feel the difference right away. Go to quince.com slash island for free shipping on your order and 365 day returns. That's almost a year, you guys,
Starting point is 00:29:26 except for that we have to adjust for leap years, okay? That's q-u-i-n-c-e.com slash island to get free shipping and 365 day returns. Quince.com slash island. You must adjust for leap years. Support comes from Wonderful Pistachios. Wonderful Pistachios is the don't hold back snack. They're healthy and they're tasty,
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Starting point is 00:30:09 If you don't believe me ask Akiva you didn't send anything in great no shells no limits Don't hold back on flavors or convenience I'll tell you what I like is just eating a ton of pistachios And I'll tell you what I don't like when I forget to hide the shells and then my wife comes home and says did you eat? All of the wonderful pistachios? And I say, no, I didn't. And then she'll say, well, where are all these shells from? And I'll say, your guess is as good as mine.
Starting point is 00:30:35 Visit wonderfulpistachios.com to learn more. All right, so we're gonna do a re-watch of, and let me just say, I know we talk about Criterion Collection, and for me, this is Cr collection, but this is also a perfect example of Kim's video in that this is one that I feel like not even people watch SNL, maybe this slipped under their radar. And if there was a young kid who said, I want to get into comedy, this would be the thing I would sort of slide across the table and be like, this is for the cool kids. Because,
Starting point is 00:31:03 obviously, based on the podcast I do, I talk a great deal about SNL at work. And sometimes when writers say they haven't seen this, one of my favorite things to do is force them to sit in my office and watch it. All right, get us kicked off here, Keef. All right, I'm about to push play. But is there anything else? So you guys wrote it, you described how you wrote it, and then Solomon were up on that deck, and then me and you are kind of co-directing, I would say. Would you agree with that?
Starting point is 00:31:27 I would agree with that, yeah. Because you weren't quite, you weren't a director on the show yet, really. I had never directed a digital short. No, and I was so grateful, like we talk about on this pod all the time, have something early in the week that we thought was funny that we could go shoot,
Starting point is 00:31:42 that would get us out of, you out of the pressure of the week. We were going to have this under our belt. I feel like we shot it on Wednesday even maybe, or we shot it early, right? That sounds right. I think you're right. Earlier than usual. Even before table read. Well, it would have been after table read because it was nighttime.
Starting point is 00:31:58 But it would have been more else it was- Not from the table read. Maybe it was Thursday night, but maybe it was from the table read or, well, that's a good question. Did this go to the table? It didn't, right? I don't remember. I think it did. I think it did. I think it was pulled from the table. I think it was at the table. I don't know.
Starting point is 00:32:14 Kevin Miller will know. But he just did it in the chat. Did anybody see that? He said he couldn't find the script, which means maybe it didn't go to the table. But regardless, we identified that we were going to shoot this, and I remember feeling all the pressure was off. Now we could just go film the scene. And little did I know, of course, we'll get to the fact that then Lauren said, well, great, it's early in the week, do another, which was wonderful. Anyways, so- And boy did it pay off.
Starting point is 00:32:37 So I remember, so I did kind of then fully direct this short on terms of cameras and making sure it was shot right. And then I remember that was one of the only ones of any that I did not edit that then you guys went off and edited While I went and made a whole other one. Okay, I'm hidden play Mm-hmm. Oh, it's bright. We made it it It's a nice restaurant. So you're having a good time? Yeah. Wow. You have a really nice smile. Your teeth are like...
Starting point is 00:33:13 perfect. I'm gonna tell my dentist that you said that. He's really self-conscious and it's gonna make him feel really good. And it made me feel really good. Well, the feeling's mutual because you are making me feel really good right now too. I'm so glad. So, um, how long have you been... Pause it, pause it. Oh, my God. She comes, before Alina said just the body language on the two shot
Starting point is 00:33:49 is Forte being this weirdo and her, like, getting up the courage to, like, breach another topic on this date. Like, she's so into you just from her body language at the very first second. Also incredible, the environment of, like, a wind blowing her, you know, jet black hair. Couldn't have asked for a better situation. I know, just to be clear, we did not have a fan on her. It was super cold and windy fall night up on that thing.
Starting point is 00:34:17 Yes, that's right. And I was worried we actually weren't going to have usable sound, because it was even hard to hear what she was saying, I remember, in my headphones. And it was almost impossible to hear what Will was saying, I remember, in my headphones. And it's almost impossible to hear what Will was saying because he's being so quiet and it's so much wind. But it's also funny because you only know it's windy on her close-up because Will's hair is so short. It seems like we have a fan on her to make her like Beyonce the entire time, which we
Starting point is 00:34:40 do not. I also do remember that I was slightly bummed because this is my version of doing this loud. Like it was like I had to push the volume. You wanted to be quieter, yeah. Yeah. Yes, on a soundstage we could have made this more nuanced. Yeah. What was her, I mean, it seemed like
Starting point is 00:34:58 based on the performance you got, she understood exactly right away what you guys needed from her. Was that the case? She basically didn't need any performance directing. Just all I remember is how good she was and how pleasant she was. And I definitely don't remember how good looking she was. That's only coming back now. Is that what you're saying, Keith?
Starting point is 00:35:22 Yeah, I'm like, whoa! Yeah, that's a, I'm like, whoa. Yeah, that's a great combination of smart, knew how to do everything, got it perfect, and is the most gorgeous person you've ever looked at straight in the face. All right, so I like that what we know so far about Brock is that he cares about his dentist
Starting point is 00:35:41 and his dentist's self-esteem. That's an amazing second line. It's so funny. I was thinking of, like, in, you know, in screenplays where they're always like, early on, try to, like, tell a story where you know what to think about a person. And it's literally, like, it's such a textured detail, and yet I don't have any idea
Starting point is 00:35:58 how it's supposed to make me feel. I'm so glad. So, um, how long have you been a SWAT team commander? A long time. So how did you get out of work tonight? I didn't. I was supposed to be at a drug bust and I bailed on it. Oh my god, are you gonna get in trouble? I don't care.
Starting point is 00:36:30 Because I like you. I like you too. Who is this guy? So when you're not doing SWAT things, what other kind of things do you like to do? I raise lambs. You raise lambs? Do you have anything else we need to say? I'm just enjoying it so much.
Starting point is 00:36:51 I mean, the way he says, I don't care, is one of my favorite line dreams of all time. It's, who is that? What is it reminding me of? I mean, this guy is an enigma. He changes every line. Yeah. I like that this also implies that they've been taught. It already came up that he commanded SWAT. And now she's asking him how long he's done it. Yeah, and he's playing hooky.
Starting point is 00:37:12 There's a lot of Patty Forte in this. You're like guilty in a way of like, I had a second bite of brownie. Oh, are you playing Patty Forte? There's... I mean, I think there are a lot of Patty Forte mannerisms in here. It's also very funny, and again. Patty's my mom. Yeah, oh sorry, Patty Forte as well as Will Forte's mom.
Starting point is 00:37:32 My mom is also Patty. Probably with a Y though, right? No, with an I. Oh! Have we never talked about it? And my mom is Patty Constantine. The actor. Yep, yeah.
Starting point is 00:37:43 He's excellent. But that's with Ds, Patty. Oh yeah, he's with two D's. And a Y. And a Y. The thing I realize is novel about her performance, and again, these are Keeves' words that she's the hottest person you could ever see up close. You know, I don't feel that way. Obviously, that's my wife, but Keeves' words.
Starting point is 00:37:59 But she's like doing so much of the work. It's very funny to watch like a scene in a rom-com, like the hot woman's not doing this much of the work. It's very funny to watch like a scene in a rom-com like the hot woman's not doing this much of the work. Because she's literally like leaning in and down to like get at your like dropped eyeline. Yeah, she has to draw him out. He's so shy, she needs to draw him out. She's trying to make it work so hard. But it's working because he obviously shared with her
Starting point is 00:38:23 this thing about how he bailed on the bus. And you know, the lambs thing, you know, he's a little excited to start telling her about the lambs, but obviously this takes a turn and, you know, comes from a vulnerable place. Spoiler. You raise the lambs? I do, I raise lambs.
Starting point is 00:38:37 I have it a little faster and I bottle feed them. And once they get to a certain age, I, for lack of a better term, slaughter them. And then I sell their meats to restaurants and, you know, jerky distributors. That must be really hard for you. It's really hard. I love my lambs. I love them so much. And it's hard.
Starting point is 00:39:10 Sorry. I have these nightmares. And then I'm like I'm drenched in sweat. And then I gotta go to work. Command SWAT. You are so brave, and I am so grateful that I know you, and you are never ever gonna be alone again. Are you asking me to marry you?
Starting point is 00:39:41 I think that I am. Yeah. Weirdest hand. He's not touching her. She's desperate for it to touch her face. No f***ing way. He gets up. Really gently puts the napkin down.
Starting point is 00:39:51 Oh my god. So the line between the two of them is a little bit different. I think that I am. Yeah. Weirdest hand. He's not touching her. She's desperate for it to touch her face. No f***ing way.
Starting point is 00:39:59 He gets up. Really gently puts the napkin down. Oh my god. So the line between the two of them is a little bit different. I think that I am. Yeah. Weirdest hand. He's not touching her. She's desperate for it to touch her face. No f***ing way. It gets up. Really gently puts the napkin down. Oh my God. So the line, it's really hard is something I think we
Starting point is 00:40:13 quote the most from that in our personal life. It's really hard. That must be really hard for you. It's really hard. I don't think I've seen that in 15 years. And Command Swat. Command Swat, it's really hard and Jerky Distributors are things that- Yeah, Jerky Distributors is wonderful.
Starting point is 00:40:36 But yeah, that turn of it's really hard. I forgot about the whole turn. It's a really good performance, Will. Totally forgot that I slaughtered them. It's really, really, really wonderful. God damn it. From what I remember, the first cut was like seven minutes long, like double it.
Starting point is 00:40:52 Is that right, John? Yeah, it was really long. Yeah, there was more turns. Well, here's the thing. In the chat right now, Kevin just found the script. It did go to the table and he didn't find it because it's called Ferris Wheel and it took place on a Ferris Wheel.
Starting point is 00:41:05 I was at the table. I knew it. Wait, can I read a line? Well, no, I mean, why am I reading a line? I feel like Will's here. Okay, just open it up. Go to page five, Will. I'll be Megan and you be Will.
Starting point is 00:41:18 Okay. All right, ready? I'm gonna ask about your parents. So tell me about your parents. My mother, God rest her soul, worked at a convalescent home. My father, God rest his soul, had a teddy bear factory. Both retired now.
Starting point is 00:41:36 They're retired, but you just said God rest their souls. I misused it. That's okay. I misused it. That's okay. I misuse words all the time. You do? Like what? Like, oh my God, I can't think of a single example. It's like when you go into a record store and you can't remember any of the stuff you wanted to buy.
Starting point is 00:42:01 I like music. All right, then we get back in the lambs. Another thing we have in common. Why she's always looking to connect you guys. Then you're in the lambs. What other great cut scenes are there in here? You also have this line. Oh, I mean, it's a good trim, but I like, go to seven, forte.
Starting point is 00:42:20 There was a little bit longer line of, it's really hard. I love my lambs. I really do. Oh no, I'm so sorry. I have these horrible nightmares. It's like when a chicken gets its head cut off and the body still runs around. But in my dreams, it's little lambs running around
Starting point is 00:42:38 without their heads. Yeah, that's a good cut. And I wake up drenched in sweat. That's a good cut, that's good. What's the last line? Wait, will you keep going, keep going. And. I wake up drenched in sweat. That's a good cut. That's good. What's the last line? Wait, wait, wait, you keep going, keep going. And then I wake up drenched in sweat, and then I have to go to work and command SWAT.
Starting point is 00:42:52 That's horrible. It's all right. I get a good price for them. And I have the Mercedes now. It's a diesel, but it's still a Mercedes. It's a diesel. You were saying still a Mercedes. It's a diesel. You were saying you haven't watched it for a while. Will, do you remember liking how it played and how it turned out?
Starting point is 00:43:10 Yeah, no, I remembered liking it. I mean, certainly the shorter cut is going to be the best. There might have been a couple things I wish were in there. But this, like the main two things I wish I could go back and see from SNL were somehow track down the longer cut of this and track down the longer cut of the potato chip scene. Right. The dress rehearsal was maybe two or three minutes longer of that one. But that, of course, is live.
Starting point is 00:43:40 Right. Oh man. Yeah, I wouldn't mind seeing more potato chip also. Yeah. I think those things, you know, when you love something as much as you love, and I love those two sketches, you can both agree like, yeah, that was the right version and also, yeah, what more do you have? Like I've been watching this version for like 15 years,
Starting point is 00:43:57 oh my God, loved to watch some other stuff. I mean, Seth, that's why we have podcasts. That's why we have podcasts, Andy, right? Yeah. Thank you. I'm glad you're the first one to come to that conclusion. I feel like that's why we have podcasts. That's why we have podcasts, Andy, right? Thank you. I'm glad you're the first one to come to that conclusion. I feel like that shows a lot of growth. Yeah, because podcasts are great,
Starting point is 00:44:10 and we all agree that it's a great medium. You've been out there. Oh, you've been out there doing your little pods. I've been pounding the pavement. You've been pounding the pavement. Well, I want to plant that digman seed for people six months from now, assuming they don't have Comedy Central.
Starting point is 00:44:22 You guys were talking about, what was it? Just like, oh, like, Ackerman basically say that thing about Eminem and how that went viral, like his blog post about Eminem. Eminem. Eminem, right? Eminem. He was getting all the oculods. He was getting the oculods for being an Eminem.
Starting point is 00:44:38 Ooh, Eminem got all the oculods. I went to a high school that's oculonies, so for some reason that's always shaded the way I say Acalods. We know that high school. Acolytes? Acolytes? Yeah. It's a shame Yoram's not here because he loves saying,
Starting point is 00:44:52 I do not do it for the Acolytes, which I think is from Xavier Renegade Angel maybe, or it's maybe just a Yoramism. Oh, man, that show. So good. Guys, it's really good, and like I said, I love watching it, and I think that this will be, I'm hoping this will sort of land in the 10 shorts
Starting point is 00:45:09 that I wanted people to watch more at the time that they will watch more now because of this podcast. Yeah. Well, I know that we were very appreciative of you guys, letting us do it. That's your slot that you guys fricking earned and to let us kind of take over for a little bit was an honor. The first one was lettuce, brother.
Starting point is 00:45:28 I know, brother, but still. And this is a classic Forte Solomon two-person scene where there's something weird. I do think whatever that Kim's video list, it's definitely on there, if not criterion, but the Kim's video, it's really at the high level of that list. It's definitely on there, if not criterion, but the Kim's video, it's really at the high level of that list, you know? Like, I'm trying to think of other examples we've had. I don't know. I guess Taper and Sherwell have to remind us, but it's definitely way up there. I actually will even say this for myself. I remember liking this at the table, and then when I saw it, the edit of it, being like, oh, God, it's so good. Like, it ended up better
Starting point is 00:46:04 than I was even expecting. Yeah. Just something about it really works. Well, again, it has that benefit because it's a short instead of a sketch. Like the quietness of Forte really plays in singles. Controlling the audio is a huge deal. Yeah. And it plays though. I mean, people were laughing all the way through.
Starting point is 00:46:21 So we probably shot this Thursday, we think, and now it's Friday, and I'm like, you guys are editing, I'm looking forward to this amazing time of just sitting in the edit with you guys and goofing around. You know you got a good one. You know it's going to work. You're very happy. It's already happened. Everyone's relaxing. And then I forget what time Lorne said, oh, you have time to do another one. But let's say it was early in the day, and we had all day to think of one and we didn't. We didn't have a good one.
Starting point is 00:46:44 And at around nine o'clock, maybe 9 p.m., I don't remember if this is the first time he said you can do it or not, but I basically had 9 p.m. was talking to Lauren and he went, well, the show's not on for another 26 hours. You're fine. Like, get started. Oh my God. It was like a comedy scene where there's a long pause and we're like, what? And then I was like, but she's, you know, still blocking till like nine or 10 or 11. Like by the time we figured this out and shoot, she'll be up all night. She has a live show.
Starting point is 00:47:14 She's not, he's like, go ask her. And then I went into her and this worked most of the time with other actors. Like I think I told the Ben Affleck story of like going in and being like, it's going to be a lot of work. And he's like, yeah, I don't want to do that. And I was like, okay. And then I left like, yes. And I remember so clearly going into her dressing room and her boyfriend at the time, Brian Austin Green is there and he's a lovely fella and he's super nice. And then I'm talking to her and I'm kind of laying out like, hey, it's 10 o'clock. We haven't written it yet.
Starting point is 00:47:42 If we do it, that means it'll shoot it like three or four in the morning What do you think and I'm trying not to like I'm playing I'm pretty thick but not so much that I could get in Trouble for tanking it and she's just like okay. Yeah, and I'm like you have the live show tomorrow You know and they'll get you in here around noon, and I said yeah, it's cool. I'm down like that's how cool she was And I was like, okay great and Oh shit Like that's how cool she was. And I was like, okay, great. All right. Then, uh, Oh shit. Truly.
Starting point is 00:48:08 I remember how to go back to you and be like, Nope, we're still doing one. It's like 10 30 PM. And then, uh, so I think have you through some script, there was some script that has some semblance of the beginning of this thing. No, do you know what it is? It's our thing we kept trying to do at the Movie Awards. My Optimist Prime thing that I've been trying to do forever. And I still kind of want to do somehow.
Starting point is 00:48:30 We did write it in, and I believe Shia was down, and Michael Bay killed it. Is that true? Or is that too spicy a take? Uh, no, that sounds right. At the Movie Awards. By the way, anybody who watches this short will be like, could call Michael Bay. Well, no, the short actually be like, could call Michael Bay.
Starting point is 00:48:45 Well, no, the short actually isn't anything like the original idea. What was the original idea for the movie awards? The original idea that we tried at the movie awards and then wrote as a backstage thing was Megan or in the movie awards, Shia talking to Optimus Prime. There's a moment in the first Transformers where Optimus Prime keeps talking about
Starting point is 00:49:03 how if he should fall, that they need to push the cube into his chest. The AllSpark. The AllSpark into his chest to destroy. Sam Witwicky. He's like, Sam, if I should fall, push the cube in my chest. And after the movie, I couldn't let it go. I was like, why did he phrase it that way?
Starting point is 00:49:24 I'm sure he phrased it other ways too, but at least once he says, push it into my chest. And it just seemed so specific and kind of sexual to me. So then we kept doing this, I kept doing this bit where I was like, Akiva, push things in my chest, push this pencil in my chest. Push it, wait, push it in halfway and then pull it back out. Now push this cucumber in my chest." And it was making us giggle because we're children. And then... But it also goes, Optimus is impossibly serious. He's impossibly serious. He's so serious as Optimus Prime. And so we wrote one where it was clearly me dressed it's Optimus Prime. So we wrote one where it was clearly me dressed up as Optimus Prime.
Starting point is 00:50:07 Yeah, take the AllSpark cube and shove it in my chest. I'm looking at one of your- Shove the AllSpark in my chest. But Andy, just for clarity, on the movie awards, it was just going to be, I remember it was just presenter pattern. It was just for him to come out on stage and then Optimus would be up on a screen.
Starting point is 00:50:21 Yeah, he's like there to present an award or something. Exactly. So in our backstage one, it was me dressed as Optimus would be up on a screen. Yeah, he's like there to present an award or something. Exactly. And so in our backstage one, it was me dressed as Optimus going, we're all in grave danger. Take the AllSpark cube and shove it in my chest. Yeah, yeah. It's the only way to save us. Shove it in my chest.
Starting point is 00:50:36 And then she says she doesn't have the AllSpark. Then what about that broom handle? Shove that in my chest. She's likeove that. Shove that in my chest. She's like, no. Shove it in. I don't see how that would help. Now, quickly, that bottle of malt liquor. Grab it and shove it all the way in my chest.
Starting point is 00:50:57 Was this line, had this line been memorable enough to the rest of the viewing public that it would have played as? Well, clearly not at the table read. Right. I don't know. That's a hit us in the tit us kind of a situation. I don't know if people remembered that much.
Starting point is 00:51:11 All right, so what we end up with is, like, this is the perfect example of you guys under the gun. Lauren won't take his foot. Well, we know we can only shoot in a hotel room or backstage at SNL. Those are the two options. We're back to the flat hotel. Yeah, so they were like, just book us two options. We're back to the flat hotel.
Starting point is 00:51:25 Yeah. So they were like, just book us a room. We're like, let's not use any crew. So it might've been four people just to have lights on in some way. Yeah. We knew Bobby would be OK to come hang out for the night. Like the people that are willing and are going to be giving you side eye for staying up till 6 AM on a show night.
Starting point is 00:51:41 Right. And then Brian Austin Green was going to be there anyways. Yeah. Because he was hanging out and we were like, oh, you want to do something? He's like, sure. We're like, great. And I guess we should watch it.
Starting point is 00:51:51 Bobby both down for anything and extra down for anything where he gets to wear a mask. Any kind of cosplay action. Yeah. Like anything that's like also a little comic Connie. Yeah. Right up Bobby's alley. Definitely. I have not seen this in a long time, so here we go.
Starting point is 00:52:06 Neither. Oh wait, whose office had the Optimus Prime mask? That's the main thing. That actually made the whole thing happen. I think I had it in my office. I think it was yours, and I don't know why. Do you? I think somebody, it was just a free Optimus Prime mask.
Starting point is 00:52:19 And they were pretty funny, because if you talked, it modulated your voice. And so that's also what was happening, Andy, is that we stole it from his office. You guys did for the Optimus Prime mask what Norm MacDonald did for Hulk hands. I think that's generous. And this is just like, it's not like we even have props.
Starting point is 00:52:36 This is just the one from your office. This is a free, like probably promo. It was like a toy at the time, a good Optimus Prime mask that you'd wear. And if you talked, it would modulate your voice a little bit. Yeah, right out the gate, walking in, it's mask that you'd wear, and if you talked, it would modulate your voice a little bit. Yeah. Right out the gate walking in, it's clearly a hotel room, nothing on the walls. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:52:50 Just no pictures, no post. You're even clearly your clothes, you've got an Oakland Athletics shirt on. A little foreshadowing to Bash Brothers. Right. Yeah, that was back when they were in Oakland. I'm really excited for movie night. Yeah, me too. I'm glad we're finally doing it.
Starting point is 00:53:03 I hope you don't mind. I asked my roommate if he wanted to wash with us. Is that okay? Oh, yeah, sure. Okay, cool. Hi, Optimus. Megan, I am pleased you have returned. Who is your friend? Just for people at home, it's Bobby in a bathrobe and thin pajama pants.
Starting point is 00:53:21 No shirt, clearly, wearing an Optimus Prime hat. I mean, the thing we just talked about. Full mask, yeah. A full helmet, essentially. Just pretty stiffly sitting on a couch. Where's your friend? Oh, Optimus, this is Andy. Andy, this is Optimus.
Starting point is 00:53:34 Hi. Hello, Andy. I'm going to put the groceries in my set. Barely doing an impression of Optimus. Godspeed on your journey to the kitchen. So, dude, I'm going to go to the bathroom. I'm going to go to the bathroom. I'm going to go to the bathroom.
Starting point is 00:53:42 I'm going to go to the bathroom. I'm going to go to the bathroom. I'm going to go to the bathroom. I'm going to go to the bathroom. I'm going to go to the bathroom. I'm going to go to the bathroom. I. On your journey to the kitchen. So, dude, you need to get the f*** out of here. What? You gotta go, bro. You gotta get out of here, man. Sorry? Hope juice is okay for everybody, cause I think we have. The music comes back in on the juice coming in.
Starting point is 00:54:03 You'd think it would start on him talking as Optimus again. Also kind of weird that we chose, I guess because she's in Transformers the cell, but Megan and I playing ourselves. Yeah, well she clearly met Optimus on set and was like... Yeah, we definitely get there. And was like, hey, he's like, I need a roommate. Well, I can come live with you. Oh, I love this guy. It's Optimus on set. Okay. Why did it come back in on the juice though? I hope juice is okay for everybody.
Starting point is 00:54:31 Try out the music. Megan, juice sounds like a wise choice, for no one will be thirsty tonight. Thanks. I'm so excited to see this movie. Such a small cast. Hey, Megan, can I talk to you for a second? Yeah, let me get the popcorn first.
Starting point is 00:54:46 Megan, the fate of the plan. Dude, I will fuck you up, man. You need to bounce now. Are you serious? Popcorn. Oh, Megan, can I actually ask you something in the kitchen? Yeah. What is the deal with your roommate?
Starting point is 00:55:01 What, you mean Optimus? Yeah, does he wear the mask all the time? He's Optimus Prime. You does he wear the mask all the time? He's Optimus Prime. We met on the Transformers set. He's eating popcorn. Andy, he's my roommate. Don't be jealous, okay?
Starting point is 00:55:15 Okay. Whoa! Oh, Optimus, it happened again. You transformed! He's full robe open, just blurred private. I didn't remember. He's just lying very limply on the couch. Just cut to him eating popcorn fully clothed. Just like a cow.
Starting point is 00:55:37 He transformed. He transformed. Optimus, it happened again. You transformed. It happened again. Oh, no. How embarrassing. I transformed without even realizing it. I guess I'll transform back. Wait, what? Wait, what? Wait, what? Hands in the air! This is a robbery!
Starting point is 00:55:57 Bumblebee! What are you doing? Sorry, old friend. Now hand over your energon cubes. Don't do it, Optimus! She's in the movie stuff. Step aside, Megan. I'll take care of this. Close-ups. Transform!
Starting point is 00:56:20 They're just moving their bodies. I like the physicality both naked oh wow a credit sequence Oh, it's a reveal that it was Brian Austin Green. Nice reveal at the end that it's Brian Austin Green as Bumblebee. Blip blurp, blip blurp, blip! Better than I remembered, honestly. It's fine for a scramble. I'd challenge you to do better, you know?
Starting point is 00:57:01 It's fine for a scramble. Again, in a very different way from Brock's date. She's great, playing a different energy. Mm-hmm. You know what she'd be good in? A naked gun style movie. For reals. Definitely would.
Starting point is 00:57:13 For reals. If only we knew someone that made that style of movie. I know. It's bygone. It's a bygone style. You can't make them anymore. You know why? Woke.
Starting point is 00:57:21 Woke. Too woke. But again, I liked watching it. It it, second time I've watched it today. It is a weird like second one to have when you have Brock's date first. Yeah. Well, I think it wasn't until, I bet you at dress it was reversed. Where did ours play? Oh, second to last.
Starting point is 00:57:38 Yeah. Yeah. That's about right. Yeah. It's also the, you just mean because they're both kind of dates, but it is what happens when a male host or female host that is an object of hotness comes on the show where all of a sudden, there's always a lot of date like when Jacob,
Starting point is 00:57:52 Lordy, when he came on every- The Bar Mitzvah boy. Okay. I thought I was thinking of a different Jacob. There's only one Bar Mitzvah boy in my world and that's Vanessa Bay. That is exactly. But yeah, it's what always happens a little bit. Yeah. So our short was Trash. So it was good to rehash that.
Starting point is 00:58:09 Rock state good. The fact that it had some good laughs in it was better than I thought. I agree. It had a couple of laughs and it was a big ol' sink of pile of trash. I thought it was funny. It is throwaway, Andy. That one's called Trash. We weren't able to try the proper amount. I think it's totally insane. It's written in an hour and then produced two hours
Starting point is 00:58:29 later. I tell you what, it's better than is whatever fucking don't say, like, hey, here's a couple cameras and Megan Fox do whatever you can come up with losers. Have fun getting 90 percent on Rotten Tomatoes with it, you fucking shitheads. You know what?
Starting point is 00:58:47 I'm gonna reply to Dave's very kind email and ask him for a voice note about this. Yeah, good. You guys, little peek behind the curtain. I love those guys. Andy, will you sing me a real quick song before we wrap it up? It's sorta Seth's Corner, but it's for a sketch
Starting point is 00:59:00 that ate so much shit it didn't even go to dress. Yeah. Hey, Seth's Corner, for a piece that ate so much shit it didn't even go to dress. Yeah. Hey, Seth's Corner for a piece that pretty much ate so much shit that you should never talk about it, but here we go. It's a Transformers restaurant. Transformers. Can I interrupt? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:59:15 I kinda wanna hear Forte's take on it. Oh, the singing the song? Yeah, Forte, you sing that song now. Oh man. Forte, can you sing Seth's Corner is like, you get it. Seth's Corner is like, you get it. Seth's Corner. Just what meets the eye. Not much more than what meets the eye.
Starting point is 00:59:32 Just what meets the eye and less than, more than what meets the eye. Ooh. Yeah. Perfect. Lateral move. No, I liked it. It got kind of jazzy, bluesy at the end. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:59:47 I'm not gonna ask Solomon and Keeb to do it because I know that they don't want to. Won't be as good. John, at least try John. No, no, would not be as good. John, John, John, John, John, John, John, John, John, John. Sam corner. John.
Starting point is 01:00:00 John. Really good to be here. Good. Yeah. I guess that's Keeb. Keeb, Keeb, Keeb, Keeb, Keeb, Keeb, Keeb. Seth, Seth, he's so cool. Really good to be here. Good. Yeah. I guess it's Keem. Keem, Keem, Keem, Keem, Keem, Keem. Seth, Seth, he's so cool. Here's his corner.
Starting point is 01:00:11 It's going to rule. Really good tip. Oh, nice. See, we don't need YORM. The Diminishing Returns, I think, is moving towards the theme of this sketch because I realized one of the problems with this sketch is it's a little bit Michael McDonald's McDonald's without the incredible impression and songs of Justin Timberlake, but it is Transformers restaurant. The Transformers is spelled with a U instead of an E for legal reasons. So obviously we're seeing the bump right away.
Starting point is 01:00:33 But it's a bunch of kids at a restaurant and they hate the menu because all the food is just one thing. And then Megan Fox comes out and says, tired of food that doesn't turn into something else, why not come down to Transformers? All the food here turns into different stuff. So it's like a hamburger turns into a taco. But then it would just be that the, we would do a stop motion of just the hamburgers kind of folding into weird taco shapes.
Starting point is 01:00:58 So it just ended up being like the worst versions of things. And... I like that as a jumping off point versions of things. And jumping off points. It's not bad if they had figured out the look, I think it would have worked. And I think I probably there were probably too many. In the same way, Keith, they were saying like we probably fell into the trap of like date sketches. I bet there were like 50 to 60 transform things to the table.
Starting point is 01:01:20 Here's what I'll say though. I think if it had been a pre-tape commercial parody, you could have controlled it more and it would have worked. Yeah, I think it would have worked. But I do like I'm going to the table. Here's what I'll say though, I think if it had been a pre-taped commercial parody you could have controlled it more and it would have worked. Yeah, I think it would have worked. But I do like, I'm gonna read one section. Wait, can I do a, uh, Andy's take on Saskiner? That's good. Um, well there we go. Look at this. I mean, we missed Yorma, but it was really delicious having you two join us. Thank you. Thank you for having us. Now, Yoram's not here, Keev. Should we do the thing we do every week, which is asking everyone what they have on their gindle?
Starting point is 01:01:52 Oh yeah, let's do a gindle. What's on your gindle? Do you know what gindle is, guys? It's a kindle. It's the gist of your kindle. So like, we don't want to hear all about the books, we just want, you know. I'll kick things off. Garfield, choose the fat.
Starting point is 01:02:09 We don't really end with a letterboxed thing. I guess you could say we're spoofing podcasts with that. That's fun. Like a hilarious spoof. So yeah, up next is Ryan Reynolds and third on the ground. A goodie. Oh, yeah. Plenty to talk about.
Starting point is 01:02:26 What do you think? What was Ryan Reynolds promoting in the fall of 2009? Green Lantern? I was going to say maybe Green Lantern. Could be. Could be the rom-com Just Friends? Could be. Could be. Are you just spitballing or are you looking at the Internet? I don't know the answer and I'm not looking.
Starting point is 01:02:41 Well, look, that's next week. We don't have to worry about that now. That is next week. Be free. Be easy of that. Be free. We don't have to worry about that now. Be free, be easy of that. Be free. I'm very excited to talk about that one. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Guys, Axel. Who am I looking at there, Seth?
Starting point is 01:02:50 Who is that? Who are you? Axel. Someone got a summer haircut. That's a broad cut. It's kind of a broad cut. Yeah, someone got a buzzy. Hey, Andy, I don't want to hear it.
Starting point is 01:03:00 Andy, I'm gonna put you on the spot. I'm not wearing the headphones, so I won't hear it. Tell Axel what you think about Frisbee. Tell it to a child's face. The best dog. The best sweetie little dog. Don't you think? Uh, no.
Starting point is 01:03:13 You don't like Frisbee? She's dying, so I don't. Yeah, same here. Same page, brother. Why not? Damn. Burn in hell by a frizz. Shit. This is getting too a frizz. Shit.
Starting point is 01:03:25 This is getting too dark for me. I can't take it. But you saw, everyone saw, I was trying to be a good person, you know? You definitely were. I was proud of you, Andy. Thank you, Will. It means a lot to me because I know you're a very moral and good guy. Throw on the original Naked Gun theme song, you know, the jazzy Big Bang thing.
Starting point is 01:03:44 Oh, yeah, yeah. And see if it makes. And see if it's a... See if it brings her back to life. That burlesque will come fast. Yeah, burlesque. See if she starts humping. Is Frisbee really dying? She's just really old.
Starting point is 01:03:54 She's not actively dying. But I would say that even a seven-year-old who's not a vet is like, last days? Um, all right. Special thanks to our guests, Will Forte and John Solomon. Thanks guys. Thank you to the hosts. We love you guys and we miss you.
Starting point is 01:04:10 Yeah, love you. I have a... Love you guys. Love you guys. Very excited for Naked Gun. Congrats. Thank you. I have something to play.
Starting point is 01:04:18 This came in while we were recording. Laterquades. Oh, that's good. That's a Liam Laterquades? Yeah, that's a Liam Laterquades. Oh my gosh. So I think we have to go, our new out, Arnold Liam. And then, remember I said I'd get Love You Quades
Starting point is 01:04:30 from the next guest I had on my show. Oh shit, our Monday guest. All right, you guys ready? You can tell me who you think it is once I play it. Love you, Quades. It almost sounded like Efron or somebody in that world, but I don't know why, what he'd be promoting. Bradley Cooper.
Starting point is 01:04:44 Sandman, it Cooper. Sandman. It's the Sandman. What? That's Sandler? That's Sandler, and I also got Bad Bunny saying it in Spanish. Hey, I'm a quake. I love you, quake.
Starting point is 01:04:54 Oh man, doesn't get any better than that. I have been watching Happy Gilmore, too. I've been watching it while I work out, so I got one more workout to watch the end, but God, I'm loving it. It's so funny. So freaking good. So many laughs.
Starting point is 01:05:07 It is so funny. It's so funny. By the way, Bad Bunny, really funny in it. Really funny. Yeah, he's really funny on SNL too. Also his album is so good. I also love when an international superstar is like, I'm gonna play a low status person.
Starting point is 01:05:21 I think that's the best. I was late to his most recent album and it fucking goes as they say. Really like it. I didn't like it. Say hi. Hello. Hi. Hi.
Starting point is 01:05:35 Ask her about Frisbee. Do you like Frisbee? No. No? No. No. You don't like Frisbee either? Yeah, no one does.
Starting point is 01:05:45 Okay, great talking to you. She said, no. She shook her head. Poor dog. All right. All right, love you guys. I feel like the fact that all my kids are coming out of the shower is gonna go.
Starting point is 01:05:56 Bye dudes. All right. Love you guys. All right, later quakes. Love you quakes. Love you guys. Love you. Bye.
Starting point is 01:06:03 Later Arnold. Later quakes.

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