The Luke and Pete Show - A Billy wristbreaker

Episode Date: March 3, 2022

Is Luke a Giant Wotsit, a Wheat Crunchie, a Frazzle, or all of the above? The answer lies in today's show...Plus, more hand-hurting emails! We discuss sitting an exam with broken fingers and a drunken accident when someone tried to sneak in without waking up their parents.Any advice for sneaking in after a few drinks? Let us know, email: [e-mail] or you can get in touch on Twitter or Instagram: @lukeandpeteshow. Feel free to give us a follow while you're there. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

It's Thursday the 3rd of March, my name is Pete Donaldson and I am full of giant watsits. When I just ran into the house to go to the loo, I picked up a load of giant watsits and just put them all in my mouth. Luke Moore, how do you like me? How do you like my apples? How do you like my Wotsits? I like to think that I'm your giant Wotsit. If you were to be a snack, I think a Wotsit would be a very, very, or maybe a wheat crunchy.

I think you'd make a good wheat crunchy. What, because I'm quite furry, you mean? Yeah, quite furry and round. You're very curly. I think you'd need to be like a frazzle. Yeah, I can definitely see the logic behind the wheat crunchy, the frazzle and the what's it. And also, because you've also obviously been consistently fond

of referring to me as some kind of honey monster type character. Yeah, that's fair. I think that's fair. Because you've got something of a knight about you. You do your best work after dark you kind of you're wiry you're kind of lithe because i'm a bit more lumbering and a bit more kind of woolly oh no yeah you're like um fozzie bear yeah that's yeah and i'm kermit the frog i used to love when i was when i was a kid um i used to love that fozzie bear had the hat with the little thing on the top.

Little propeller. Oh, wasn't that the Muppet Baby incarnation of Fozzie Bear? Oh, maybe. But I can also remember, so I was obsessed with Calvin and Hobbes when I was a kid. Oh, yeah, right. And I know that's quite a cool thing to say now, so I apologise. I promise you I'm not backfilling the narrative. I genuinely was.

I used to have all the annuals, everything I used to ask for. I was a snoopy guy, but yeah. And to be honest, it's a power, the power of the, Bill Watterson's like,

Calvary and the Hobbes work, is such a kind of cool thing. And I'll tell you why, right? I read those comic strips as a kid, and didn't really have any understanding or depth of knowledge about the wider implications of what it was saying.

Yeah. I just thought it was about a cool, cute kid and his imaginary tiger friend, right? Which would manifest, for those who aren't familiar with the comic strip, it would manifest as if it was a cuddly tiger when anyone else was there, but it was just him.

It would be like a real tiger and he would have conversations with it and they'd go on adventures together and then you read that stuff as an adult now and it is tremendously powerful and tremendously affecting on like an adult level as well and I just had no idea and it's amazing that it can appeal to both children

and adults in that way and it just feels incredible to have been a part of it i love that i love calvin i love the fact that he's never let them turn it into a movie or right sort of what i would consider to be dilute the work in any kind of way i don't even know if he's still alive bill watson but anyway amazing amazing stuff and i think there's a storyline in that where calvin it goes on for several comic strips, where Calvin wants to save up for this hat that you get with cereal.

So you buy a certain amount of cereal, and you eat a certain amount of cereal, and you get a hat with a little propeller on it. And the whole story is like him and Hobbes talking about where they're going to fly to and getting two of them for him and this tiger and where they're going to go. It's going to be amazing.

And then, obviously, Cut Along is very short. He ends up getting the hat with the propeller and it just puts it on his head and the propeller spins around and stuff, but it doesn't go anywhere because obviously that's not how the world works and he learns that lesson. Obviously, as an adult,

I can understand the double meanings in that. But as a kid, I just remember being really excited for him to get it. Do you know what I mean? Yeah. So you were waiting for the adventures to start. Yeah.

The end was like, Where's he going to go? It's a classic version of us buying something off Instagram and coming back and it's shit. Oh, I managed to make it, I managed to make a real

silk purse out of a sow's ear with an Instagram purchase a while back. Okay. This is making me go, this is making me good this is the moment you sound like an absolute clown so strap yourself in i can't i don't know how good a job i'm going to do of explaining it to you but it's like a handle the metal triangle on the front

and you spoke and it's advertised to be used for the um herringint rolling, alternative to a lint roller. So it's a, so it is a, you see them a lot with tweed, it's a very fine, sometimes razor that kind of takes off, kind of takes off any loose kind of fibres and you end up with a nice smooth thing. It probably damages the court massively, but it's nice, it works. It probably damages the court massively, but it's nice. It works. Spoiler alert. I got one. Used it on my jumper.

Completely fucked the jumper. Pulled about eight threads out of the jumper to the point where it looks ridiculous to even wear it now. On the very first scrape. Yeah. I got fucking pissed off about it. I spoke to the wife I have access to. Cut that story short. She just said, well, you're a complete idiot.

Why'd you do that? It's a stupid a complete idiot. Why'd you do that? It's a stupid thing to do. Why would you do that? Those things are designed for tweed though, aren't they? Yeah, but the Sal's, listen,

the silk purse from the Sal's ear, I coincidentally, um, Shave my cat. Yeah. I coincidentally used it as a comb when all my hair came out. No,

I, I, I used it on the carpet. It's fucking perfect out. No, I used it on the carpet. It's fucking perfect. Absolutely perfect. It cleans the carpet like you would not believe. Right, so I mean, you're effective, but what you're doing there is effectively

just shaving the carpet in many ways. But the carpet looks, you run it over the carpet a few times in that particular portion of carpet, and the carpet is not noticeably damaged in any way and it looks absolutely brand new take fucking tuck mate that's all i'm saying if you keep using that bloody lint roller yeah i can't do that recordings because i've got to replace the carpets but it's so satisfying as well it's so satisfying and it's one of those kind of mindfulness things

you know you know what it reminds me of you You know, you see those Buddhist monks who just, they just, is it Buddhism? Was it Shintoism or whatever, where you just, you're combing the gravel with that rake? Right, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's like that. You see them in executive boardroom tables, don't they? Yeah, it's like that, but in a Victorian maisonette in West Norwood with clutter everywhere. Anyway, I don't know how we started talking about that. Yeah, I am like Fozzie Bear, yeah.

In a similar way, I've got a little machine that lives in the front room because one of the dogs, Buckley, the old one, she's decided to just start pissing on the carpet. Oh, no. Just standing there, eyeballing you, pissing on the carpet. So now I've got one of those watery,

like water vacs things I never really knew I'd need before. But it works really well. You've just got this little kind of secret sauce that you put in the side and some hot water and it just basically sprays water into the carpet and then sucks it back up again. Is it called Rug Doctor?

So the Rug Doctor is like a bigger more professional version. they're the ones that you can rent from Sainsbury's sort of locked up on the I'll do that on a Thursday night

when I'm in there do it I've done it a couple of times it's really really impressive it's got a big old range and you fill it up and it comes with

this stuff you put in it's fantastic stuff love it poor old Buckley though does he just not know what's happening then erm I think he does

just a notcher I think it's a power move nah he's alright usually it's just I just think he gets confused sometimes erm but yeah

he's alright he's in fine 14 and a half year old dog he won't be the first person in that household to get confused and take a slash where he shouldn't have done

will he exactly right in the cupboards right in the drawers I remember, the, the, the clothes drawers,

not my actual drawers, but also clothes drawers, clothes drawers. Both, both. I was in, I was in the street, and this bloke came up and went,

I've got a border terrier, is he getting lumpy? And I was like, yeah, he is, like, mine's really lumpy, and so I was letting this man feel,

the lumps of a dog, like, when, I don't know whether it's specific to borders, but, they get like, cystic, kind of fatty lumps, basically, that kind of just, that you can, you can have them drained,

but you've got to put them under, so there's not really a point in doing it. They're not dangerous, really. No, they're not dangerous. They're not cancerous or anything. It's just, I mean, from one lumpy man to another, I've said it before,

like, I'm constantly, there's always just a fucking cyst forming somewhere that, like, will appear. It doesn't do anything, then it fucks off for a bit. Yeah. Sometimes goes hard. I wouldn't notice cancer if it fucking came up and punched me in the face, because I'm just a lumpy man.

So when I see Buckley's lumps, I'm like, ah, it's a lumpy dog. But this guy was like, is your dog lumpy? I'm like, yeah, he's got a lump there, and he was touching the lumps, and I was like, is this all right? What's he thinking about this? No wonder he's pissing on your carpet. He's absolutely taking the piss out of him

let me do my responsible bit and say to anyone listening if you do find anything like that you should get checked out immediately go to a fucking doctor

Jesus Christ and you know don't do go to the doctor for that don't go for the doctor when your fingers hanging off like we heard on

Monday that's more about going straight to the A& e yeah go straight to a and e for that one when i when i shaved my finger off i uh more on the fingers later but when i shaved my finger off it was straight to the a and e there was no messing around no exactly when my two cats are kind of interesting because they do definitely develop different characters as they get older but one of my cats now is really cantankerous. He's like, if you, so for example, he'll come in the morning and he'll jump up on the bed

and he'll sleep on the bed because he's probably been out all night because they're nocturnal-ish or they're active at dusk. So he goes on the bed and then we go and do our thing and maybe we'll go off to work

or whatever or one of us is working from home and we need to make the bed. But you can't make the bed with him on it, right? Right. But if you take him off the bed, he just jumps straight back on it again.

So you have to make the bed around him. But any time you move him, he starts going, meh, meh, meh. Yeah. And we just will not have it, right? And the worst thing he does, going back to the carpet again,

if you carry him up and take him out the bedroom, shut the bedroom door, he'll just scratch the carpet up until you let him back in again and i don't know how to stop him so it's very much like when sarah goes to work earlier than me that's what she has to deal with stop trying to make the bed up i want to go to sleep yeah i like having a maid bed though don't you i look there's nothing bad um i think it sounds so incredibly middle class but there were um some linen sheet spot it's the best sheets

I've ever and I get in them and I'm like God these linen sheets are great God and I would never have thought of investing in linen sheets

I'm going to send you a link right to the plaid shirt sheets the plaid sheets

that L.L. Bean make right they're expensive but you only use them in the winter right and mate they are absolutely life-changing life-changing stuff right it's very very much worth making the investment if you can yeah um because in the winter your life will never be the same again you might as well put the heating on I'm telling you that now you'll be loving life mate I'm going to send you a link and if anyone else

is interested get in touch I'll link you up I promise you not being paid to say this this is not a commercial message but those L.L. Bean plaid sheets

are just the best one of the best things that my wife who's from New England has brought into my life they're a big thing over that part of the best things that my wife who's from new england has brought into my life they're a big thing over that part of the world yeah i would recommend them a great deal i'm glad that podcasts have moved from mattresses to sheets it's good it's a natural progression right natural progression i'll tell you i don't mind saying it when when um whoever

it was casper sponsored us they sent us they sent me a mattress for free i still use it now it's the best thing that's ever come out i think i think I think I might have sent mine to my sister, and she used it for a long time, but they didn't have much cash, so I thought, well, I've got no use for it. Good for you. I greedily hoarded it. I had a mattress going rotten in the garage in the last house.

That was a nightmare. If you're going to put your mattress in storage, for crying out loud, get a mattress protector. Get a big plastic bag you put them in, tape it up nice, and then it won't go rotten. That is remarkably specific advice. Pete, let's take a break, because I'm just conscious that we've got

hand-hurt emails to fit in. We've also got to do batteries this week. Should we take a bit of an early break today? Yeah. And then we'll squeeze more in on the second half. Should we do that? Okey-dokey.kie all right we'll see you in a minute have you ever wondered what happened to all those space age promises that previous generations thought we'd have by now you know heading out for the day on your own personal flying cars

or working on a space hotel somewhere in the far reaches of our solar system where are all those amazing inventions? Well, we're here to find out more on my new podcast, Where's My Jetpack? I'm Sarah Kredis, space expert, TV host, and author. Join me and Luke Moore every week as we look into retrofuturistic tech that never was to decide whether it's still just science fiction, or if some of these discoveries are actually a lot closer than you think. I think we're very close to that happening on an even more regular basis. And what I think is interesting about that too

is that's going to make the accessibility of getting to space available for more and more people. So if you've ever wondered whether we'll one day speak to aliens light years away or you'll be flying to work on a jetpack, this is the podcast for you. Think of the car parking spaces, they need to be massive, really wide. No, the wings can fold up. Well, they don't exist. No, some of the cars which were designed had wings which folded up.

Are you happy getting in a plane knowing the wings fold up? Yeah. I trust engineering. Trust the science. Search Where's My Jetpack on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts. Where's My Jetpack is a Stack production and part of the Acast Creator Network.

We're back with the Luke and Pete show, and as we always do at around about this time in your working week, we are talking battery brands. Have you got a new battery brand for the boys? Let us know. Show at nohello at lukenpeetshow.com if you've found a battery in a toy or a boy. Or a toy boy.

What does the second one mean, though? What does it mean? A little Calvin and Hobbes dancing figurine okay yeah fair one yeah I don't really think

I don't really think he does merch but I get what you're saying he does merch he must do he's on every t-shirt he's loads of Calvin and Hobbes t-shirts

surely could be unlicensed I'm very much Calvin and you're Hobbes is Hobbes the dog tiger the dog I'm a Snoopy guy

what the fuck are you talking about you maniac I'm a Snoopy guy you're talking about the textures of Calvin and Hobbes and I'm basically talking about how'm a Snoopy guy. What the fuck are you talking about, you maniac? I'm a Snoopy guy. You're talking about the textures of Calvin and Hobbes, and I'm basically talking about how, you know, Snoopy. I mean, for crying out loud, Charlie Brown had a therapist. Like, how fucking annoying is that? Yeah, I did like Snoopy, but I didn't get into it as much.

I'm sure there's a lot of depth to that as well. I'm just not an expert in it. Here are your batteries, mate. You read them out. I'll search for them, brother. Beautiful. Sean from Whitley Bay has got in touch. It's me again! Tried to find an elusive new player after multiple failed attempts. I'm pretty

sure I've not heard this on the show, so I'm holding on to hope that this lighthouse alkaline battery that is one of a trio I found in a head torch will come through for me. Sean from Whitley Bay, I'm enjoying your chutzpah. I'm enjoying your moxie. And I'm enjoying the fact that you've once again got into

trying to get that battery brand in there. I've got bad news for Sean, I'm afraid. Oh, Seanie! But it's a little bit more interesting than just the straight bad news. Okay. Because Lighthouse Alkaline were sent in on October 27th of last year by our friend Johnny Dawes. Okay. Who includes in the email the fact that he also found them in a head torch.

Oh, so the head torch battery of choice. They must be. They must be. But look, the reason you won't have heard it on the show is because we can't get through all of them. We can only do some of them. But what we can do is search for the ones that have been sent in and give you a comprehensive database of whether they're new or not. And I'm afraid to say, Sean,

Johnny's beat you to the punch there by a few months, but at least he's your brother in head torches, if that's any consolation. I think it is, to be honest. I really do think it is. We've got a message from Sam. Hello, fellas. Have Rapid Batteries made it to Battery Brands list yet? Cheers, Sam. Hello, fellas. Have rapid batteries made it to battery brands list yet?

Cheers, Sam. Short, sweet, and rapid. Well, I think this is a fundamental problem with our system here. Because if you just type the word rapid into our email address, you get quite a lot of different results, right? Yeah. So I'm going to say that, Sam, you are a new player because I don't have any reasonable way of checking comprehensively.

So what I would say is this. We'll put you in for now. Good for you. If anyone can show us evidentiary evidence or evidentiary proof that they've sent them in earlier than this week, then please do so and we'll update accordingly. So, Sam, you're in, but you're in on licence, mate. You're on probation for now.

Okey-dokey, cool. Look, in between this... Actually, no, I'll do it at the end of this one. Friends, I have a sneaking suspicion I've heard of white elephants on the pod before, but I couldn't pass up the opportunity after I discovered these in a friend's hotel DVD player remote player remote hugs and kisses white elephants white elephants have we had these before i don't think we have had white elephants before i think you are a new player kia so

congratulations to you yeah smashing smashing um so we'll be back next thursday with more battery brands if you've got a battery that you found in a a bit of nonsense uh that you've been bought or Smashing, smashing. So we'll be back next Thursday with more battery brands. If you've got a battery that you found in a bit of nonsense that you've been bought or maybe you bought it off Amazon and it came with three AA's or AAA's or D cells or whatever, get in touch. Hello at LukeandPeteShort.com and do provide a picture if it's particularly interesting and esoteric and strange.

You have to provide a picture. You have to, Pete. Otherwise what we're going to do here is people just say any word, couldn't they? Bimbles. I've got a set of bimbles in my head torch.

It's a bimble battery. It doesn't make any sense. I can send a picture and it's not being considered. Luke, I must apologise. We are doing this show remotely for various studio and logistical calendar situations.

If my video has been grainy for the past few minutes, I have to admit, I was downloading the 46 gigabyte patch for the Cyberpunk 2077 game. Oh my goodness me. So apologies if I was a little... What a great connection you must have. I was in the middle of that, and it's done. It's finished.

Look, I spent a lot of money for bloody broadband as we well know and as I've mentioned before. So apologies if I was a little bit grainy. I've turned it off now. You know that if anyone wasn't going to notice that kind of thing, it's going to be me because I am a tech idiot. Speaking of downloading stuff for video games though,

my pals asked me if you would join our PUBG team, by the way. Yeah, well, I thought... Didn't you ask me this on the last show as well? What I said to them was, do you definitely want him? Oh, right. So you're mainly asking me again just because you're asking yourself, really, aren't you? He's more of a driver, is what I said, really.

I'm a baby driver. I can be a baby driver. I just wait with the van running. I just sort of toot around the map. I'd love that. I love games that are so open-ended that people have jobs inside them. There was that big space one.

I can't remember the bloody name of it, but it's been running for like 15 years or something. It's called Everspace or something like that. But it's like people have jobs like collecting tax or making little parts of ships to sell to other people and these are real world jobs. Collecting tax?

It's the original kind of metaverse to a certain extent, like people making jobs, making money and making jobs and making money in the real world because people spend a lot of time on this platform and they're willing to pay a bit of money for some quality stuff.

Weren't people saying Second Life was the first original iteration of that? Well, I think with everyone getting excited about the metaverse, and the metaverse is basically Second Life, but it's supposed to be away from any central, a decentralised kind of Second Life kind of game really but everyone's kind of implementation of the metaverse like facebook's meta etc etc or meta's metaverse um that's centralized so it's owned by someone so it can be shut down it can be changed so it in the very decentralized you doing the decentralizing it's very it's very it's very

sense of the word it's not decentralized it's not really on the blockchain It's very sense of the word. It's not decentralized. It's not really on the blockchain. It's just people in the fucking... The metaverse means something different to what they're actually producing. But yeah, people are getting excited about the metaverse. You can do this, you can do that. You could do that in fucking Second Life 20 years ago.

It's insane. I saw a... But isn't the way that people experience it going to be obviously vastly improved because of the tech compared to 20 years ago, though? I mean, marginally. The shots of the metaverse to 20 years ago though i mean marginally the shots of the metaverse as we know it in 2022 it wasn't vr was it wasn't vr in 20 years ago was it it looked it honestly looks like um i remember when playstation 3 came out they had a thing

called playstation home where you can make your own little kind of cool architecturally impressive house and you could have your friends around you could play pool and billiards and bowling and all that stuff and um it's just like that for me no one's got any fucking legs i saw a really good meme where um it was a picture of mark zuckerberg looking quite sinister and the quote underneath just said in speech marks and don't forget if you die in the metaverse you die in real life too oh lordy so funny um we're gonna do hand hurt emails right yes yes we are we did we did a couple last time and uh we're doing some more this time this has been a a rich vein of bloody stumps coming down the pipe producer rory said you've got to get two episodes out of these hand hurting

emails and we have done to be fair at least two well done us at least two we listen here's the next here's the next dodgy hand cab off the block yeah which is off the rank which is from Luke Viles a fellow Luke

he says hi guys another Luke here answering your call for stories on hand hurting you asked for the other day now this story is weird and I'm going to tell you

why afterwards but I'm going to read it first he says my hand injury unfortunately occurred on the same day as my A-level sociology exam. Playing football on the playground a few hours before the exam, I was throwing a ball back to my friends,

when another ball from a match going on alongside ours happened to land on the tip of my pinky finger on my left hand. The weird coincidence led to immediate agony, nausea, and my finger looking extremely out of place. A mad dash with my mum to the nearest walk-in centre showed that I had dislocated and fractured the little guy in two places, but I had to go to A&E and wait several hours to get it popped back into place. So, I decided to do the exam first,

and with the help of many painkillers managed to get an A star, well done, before heading back to the hospital later that night to get it sorted it was a surprising amount of pain for such a small part of the body and it still looks a bit bent to this day, funnily enough this injury occurred on the same day that ex Norwich keeper John Ruddy broke his finger

which ruled him out of England's Euro 2012 squad cheers and thanks for all the pods Luke, now that's kind of an interesting story right I applaud him and commend him for still Luke now that's kind of an interesting story right I applaud him and commend him for still getting

an A star in his A level despite going through that now when I was 16 I was working at a sports shop with a pal

Mark Dunford who you've also met Pete do you remember Mark yes I think I do he's a journalist guy he came and did a lot of our press

for our most recent tour. Oh yes, I remember, he was lovely. Yeah, lovely fella. Good lad. We were both

Saturday boys at this sports shop and I was doing my GCSEs at the time as well, I was 16 and at one point we were just mucking about

and we ran from the shop floor up the back stairs to the warehouse bit. I was chasing him for some reason and he was in front of me and I put my hand around the corner not knowing i was putting my finger in the hinge of the door and he slammed the door

behind him right right on the nail of this finger here right and uh it was terrible it was awful it's horrific right um i had to go straight home i fucking went home I think on my moped right right I guess one handed it was about a 20 minute journey yeah got back and this is

following up to what our mate who emailed me on Monday said about the going to the doctor I was saying that's quite like an old fashioned thing to do

I checked this out my finger the nail was hanging off it was like three times the size it should have been I had an exam the next day GCSE right because I off it was like three times the size it should have been I had an exam the next day GCSE right because I think it was

like a Sunday shift and then Monday I had the exam yeah my mum she goes oh that doesn't look good does it

fucking hell she goes oh yeah I'll call the doctor she just fucking rang him and he was like probably half asleep having a glass of wine

or something it was like oh what's happened oh he's done this. Can you describe it to me? I remember vividly us describing it to him and him going, yeah, it'll probably be all right. Just go and keep an eye on it. The next morning, it was about four times the size it was before.

I had to go to the exam. I could hardly move my left hand. I can't remember what the exam was. I can't remember what grade I got. Probably shit. Anyway, after a while I had to go back I had to go to A&E

I had to remove the nail it was awful yeah so I feel the pain quite literally of having a terribly damaged finger on the same at the same time

as doing the exam and I applaud you for getting an A star Luke because I've never got an A star on anything in my life so I definitely didn't get an A star with that one

no I did once and it was RE. That did. To me, that's baffling, because you got an A-star on GCSE RE. I've been on this show where you literally forgot how Jesus died. Yeah, but I remember the sermon on the mount, mate.

That was the important stuff, because it was all stories, wasn't it? Like, you don't learn anything about anyone. Nothing useful, like, really. It's all just about, you know, camels going through the eye of the needle and what that means and all that bollocks. Yeah, but you can't get an A-star

without knowing about the crucifixion, surely. Yeah, but it's like Game of Thrones. I can't remember what happened at the end of that. Don't bring up Game of Thrones, because you know remember what happened at the end of that. Similar. Don't bring up Game of Thrones because you know your behaviour around

that's been unacceptable in the past. Oi, oi, oi. Shall we get a hand injury from Gavin Cook? Why not? Cool. Hi guys.

In response to your call to action for hurt hands, I've had my fair few. I was a goalkeeper for most of my youth and at a conservative guess,

have broken my wrist at least 15 times. I can't believe that. I don't think you can do that, can you? Jesus. Yeah, I don't think you can do that. We take the point though. Just having footballs blasted at me. However, my worst broken wrist was due to a kitchen

renovation. My mum was having a new posh kitchen installed. While the old kitchen was being removed, roughly four large and heavy marble or similar worktops were placed in the hallway, lying horizontally across the door to my living room. Now, if you're unfamiliar with marble, you know, I don't run into a lot of it in my day-to-day. I don't have any marble work surfaces. Fuck me, they are also, they're quite delicate, aren't they? Or is it stone that's really delicate? Yeah, and they're really heavy. Either way, they're quite delicate, but they are? Or is it stone that's really delicate? Yeah, and they're really heavy.

Either way, they're quite delicate, but they are the heaviest thing in the world. Like, they're so heavy. They're ridiculous. I came home after a rather messy night out and ready for bed, attempted to step over the worktops as I left the room. I failed miserably. I fell flat on my back, looking up at what seemed to be falling in slow motion, a pile of worktops heading towards me. I just about managed to move my head, motion, a pile of worktops heading towards me. I just about managed

to move my head, which is a smart move, but the full weight of the worktops landed on my wrist, just underneath my thumb. My mother had to rescue me from underneath the pile as I tried to claim that I was fine and definitely not drunk. I think I was about 16. I don't think she believed me. The good thing was that it didn't hurt until the morning, but a hospital visit the next morning when I sobered up and it really did begin to fucking hurt confirmed i'd fractured the bones in and around my thumb and wrist i'm just glad it wasn't my head gavin cook your hands ruinous absolute wasteland i'm so sorry gavin i thought he was gonna say because he because he claimed at the start he broke his wrist 15 times yeah he sounded like he might be a bit of a billy bullshitter i thought he's gonna say that the

marble put his wrist right back into place and everything was fine. Or his hand smashed all the marble and he became a hard hand man. Clearly that's not what happened. That's dangerous. I'm not sure any kind of respectable builder should be leaving that kind of weight of things unsecured. No, not near a 16 year old

drunkard exactly. Yeah, true. Good point. Off his head on stubbies. Goodness. I remember coming home once to my parents' house and dropping a curry everywhere. And then trying to pick it up and putting my hands in it and then putting my hands all over the wall, trying to find a light switch and all this terrible. All right, let's get out of here.

Let's go. We'll be back on Monday for more of this stuff. We might even squeeze a couple more hand-hurt emails in because we've got loads to get through. You guys have really done an amazing job in keeping your hands unsafe over the years and we applaud you for that. If you've enjoyed the show,

do leave us a review wherever you listen. Get in touch, hello at lukeandpete.com for the email and we are at lukeandpeteshow.com on the socials.

Thank you very much indeed. Thanks to you, Pete. Have a great rest of the week and the weekend and we shall see you next time. And yes, listeners, I did clock that he said applaud. Farewell. Thank you. The Luke and Pete Show is a Stack Production

and part of the ACAST Creator Network.